CONTENTS
04 | AUSTRALIA DAY HIGHLIGHTS 06 | BEST OF BRITISH 08 | SYDNEY ENTERTAINMENT 12 | UNEARTHING KINGS CROSS 16 | MELBOURNE ENTERTAINMENT 20 | THE ST KILDA SCENE 22 | DIVING AND SNORKELING IN OZ 24 | GREAT BARS OF BRISBANE 26 | PARTY AROUND THE WORLD 28 | DELIGHTS OF KUALA LUMPUR 29 | TRAVEL ESSENTIALS 30 | WHAT’S TRENDING 32 | INTERVIEWS 37 | MUSIC NEWS 39 | FUNNY NEWS & SPORTS 44 | CRYSTAL BALLS & JOKES 46 | ADULT CLASSIFIEDS 48 | ACCOM & TRAVEL LISTINGS 52 | RECRUITMENT NEWS 54 | BBM TRIVIA EDITOR Hannah Shakir hannah.shakir@what-media.com SPORTS & NEWS EDITOR Richard Gadsby CONTRIBUTORS James Stapleton, Amy Baker, Laura Stevens, Jim Palmer, Carol Friel, Alexandra MacLeod, Sophie Brown, Peter Simpson, Alexandra Macleod, Dan Colombini, Siobhan Way, Sarah Wilk Robert Bramhill, Robin Lewis, Oliver Wade WEB DEVELOPMENT Luke Webber & Jess Comber DESIGN Jess Comber | Kane Baker E: design@what-media.com PRINT & WEB ADVERTISING & MARKETING Tom Shakir E: tom.shakir@what-media.com P: +61 2 8005 8162 Frankie Salt E: marketing1@bbmlive.com P: +61 8 9433 6162 CLASSIFIEDS & LISTINGS E: info@what-media.com P: +61 2 8005 8162 PRINTED BY SPOTPRESS COVER IMAGE CREDIT Alabama Shakes At Secret Garden Festival UK Photo By Andrew Whitton NOTE TO ADVERTISERS Gaining the approval for the use of trademarks and images in advertisments is the responsibility of the advertiser and not What Media Pty Ltd. Advertising material is accepted in good faith and What Media Pty Ltd bears no responsibility for any claims or errors. Copyright of original material is held by What Media Pty Ltd. Reproduction in whole or part is forbidden except with written permission of the publishers.
HIGHLIGHTS
Australia Day 2013
Sydney
Australia Day Sunset Boat Party
If you head to Coogee Bowls this Australia Day you’ll find a relaxed festival playing an eclectic mix of Funk, Soul, Hip Hop, Dub, Reggae, Tech House, Disco and plenty more. Green Beats is a festival focused on lawn bowls and quality music, with an impressive lineup teamed with a great atmosphere, beanbags, games of bowls and cheap cider this is a great opportunity to celebrate Australia Day. What: Green Beats Australia Day When: Saturday 26th January – Midday until Sunset Where: Coogee Bowling Club, Dolphin Street Price: $30 Plus booking fee More Info: greenbeats.com.au
Aboard the Constellation Supercat, Summit DJs will present their Australia Day Sunset Boat Party. The boat boasts three floors of DJs as well as 360 degree views of the fireworks over Sydney Harbour. The top floor sundeck is the perfect place to take in great views while you celebrate in style. With three licensed bars and numerous DJs spinning great tracks there won’t be any signs of cabin fever on this boat. What: Summit DJs Present Australia Day Sunset Boat Party When: Saturday 26th January – 6pm until 10pm Where: Constellation Supercat, Sydney Harbour Price: $50 including buffet More Info: summitdjs.com
Dirty Bird Garden Party
Melbourne
Green Beats Festival
Chinese Laundry are hosting a garden party like no other at Ivy. With a Dirty Bird Records showcase featuring Claude Von Stroke, Justin Martin, J. Philip and U-Khan, this Australia Day party will certainly be a great success. As the Dirty Bird label goes from strength to strength on the House music scene, a ticket to this event is sure to be hot property. What: Dirty Bird Garden Party When: Saturday 26th January 12pm-7pm Where: Ivy Courtyard, 330 George Street Price: $35-$50 More Info: chineselaundryclub.com.au
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Big Day Out Festival
This year Big Day Out Festival takes place in Melbourne on Australia Day. Guaranteed to be a phenomenal event, huge names such as Red Hot Chilli Peppers, The Killers, Vampire Weekend, B.O.B and Foals will all be taking to the stage. What better way to celebrate Australia Day as you enjoy live performances from musical legends. What: Big Day Out Festival Melbourne When: Saturday 26th January Where: Flemington Racecourse, Melbourne Price: $165-$265 More Info: www.bigdayout.com
Boogie Nights
For classic hits from the 70s, 80s and 90s head to One Twenty Bar on Australia Day. This is a Melbourne institution that has been hosting great parties for over 20 years. One Twenty Bar will certainly help you celebrate Australia Day in style as well as offering Jeager Bombs and Skittle Bombs for $10. For a retro night to remember, you can’t go wrong here. What: Boogie Nights When: Saturday 26th January – 9pm till late Where: One Twenty Bar, 120 Johnston Street, Melbourne More Info: www.120bar.com
Australia Day Firework Display
Federation Square is the perfect location to enjoy an Australia Day Fireworks Display. Take a walk to the banks of the Yarra River for the best vantage point while you watch the fire crackers unfold across the Melbourne skyline. We all know that Australia knows how to put on a great firework display, so get your oos and ahs at the ready. This is a great way to end the day, which will have definitely been brimming with excitement and fun. What: Australia Day Firework Display When: Saturday 26th January, 9pm onwards Where: Federation Square More Info: www.australiaday.com.au
Fremantle Twelve Foot Ninja
Catch Twelve Foot Ninja at Mojo’s Bar on Saturday 26th January as part of their biggest headline tour to date. This progressive Rock band formed in Melbourne gained recognition following their ground breaking 12-week album release campaign entitled ‘Project Twelve’. Their debut album was heralded as ‘the best heavy music album of the year’, see them perform their mind-boggling new single ‘Coming For You’ this Australia Day. What: Twelve Foot Ninja Plus Special Guests When: Saturday 26th January – 8pm Where: Mojo’s Bar, 237 Queen Victoria Street, North Fremantle Price: $21.45 More Info: www.mojosbar.com.au
Brisbane
Kaliber Boutique Lounge & Bar BBQ
Enjoy a free BBQ on Australia Day at Kaliber in Brisbane. From 2pm onwards the bar will be hosting an Australia Day party in the heart of Brunswick Street Mall. What: Australia Day Free BBQ When: Saturday 26th January – 2pm until 10pm Where: Kaliber Boutique Longue and Bar, Brunswick Street Mall More Info: www.kaliber.com.au
HIGHLIGHTS
The Best of British...
You may be soaking up the sun, but alas you just can’t stop thinking about lashings of Coleman’s mint sauce all over a nice cut of roast lamb, accompanied by some proper crunchy Yorkshire puddings. Nor can you forget the aroma of succulent pork sausages ready to burst out of their skin. We know how close you can come to tears when faced with yet another morning of begrudgedly smeering vegimite on to your toast, so we’ve sussed out the best places in Australia where you can satisfy all the cravings you have for all things British.
Sydney
Palace Hotel Sydney
Formerly known as Paddy Maguires and Yard House, The Palace Hotel Sydney is by far one of Sydney’s best city pubs. With a great selection of draught beers on tap it is a great place to watch the late night live sports such as the English Premier League, Scottish Premier League and the up coming 6 Nations Rugby. You’ll also enjoy the atmosphere without the usual crowd that frequent the other local 24-hour sports bars. Corner of George & Hay Street, Haymarket (02) 9212 2111 www.palacehotelsydney.com.au
Cousin Jacks Pasty Co.
If you’re missing the traditional Cornish pasty, never fear, Cousin Jacks Pasty Co. have the answer to your prayers. Serving up a hand-crimped Cornish steak pasty from an English recipe that has been passed down over generations, you’ll certainly get a taste of home at Cousin Jacks. The team here are dedicated to making authentic pasties which are rich in flavour and history. Shop 5, The Royal Arcade, 175 – 181 Oxford Street, Bondi Junction, Sydney (02) 8096 4304 www.cousinjackspastyco.com
Cock ‘N Bull
For a taste of Ireland, head to the Cock ‘N Bull. This was the first bar in Australia to have Magners on tap, an ideal thirst quencher during the summer months. With a traditional Irish farmhouse menu they serve up delights such as traditional Beef and Guinness Pie and Bangers and Mash. 89 Ebley Street, Bondi Junction, Sydney (02) 9389 3004 www.cocknbull.com.au
Bat and Ball
Bat and Ball is an inviting pub with plenty of charm. With a British inspired menu, you’ll be able to satisfy any homesick pangs you’re having for Blighty. Praised for their superb Bangers and Mash, Bat and Ball also offer a traditional Ploughman’s lunch with all the trimmings, including a good helping of Branston pickle which will fill you right up. It doesn’t get more British than that! 495 Cleveland Street, Surry Hills, Sydney (02) 9699 3782 www.thebatandball.com.au
British Sweets and Treats
If you have a sweet tooth and you are in desperate need of a Jaffa Cake or Jelly Baby fix, you’ll want to pay a visit to British Sweets and Treats. They stock a huge range of British confectionary including Walkers Crisps, Yorkshire Tea and Fruit Pastilles. The store also carries a number of old fashioned sweets in traditional lolly jars, perfect if you are
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feeling a little nostalgic. For chocolate cravings the Cadbury and Galaxy selection will feed your appetite. Shop 6 Bronka Arcade, 157-165 Oxford Street, Bondi Junction (02) 8094 9921 www.britishsweets.com.au
Melbourne
Elephant & Wheelbarrow
The Elephant and Wheelbarrow prides itself on being a Traditional British Pub. They offer a delicious fry up consisting of eggs, bacon, sausage, tomato, Heinz beans, hash browns with toast and butter, perfect for a hangover or if you’re just feeling a little homesick. Their British menu also offers delights such as Shepherd’s Pie, Bangers & Mash and Gammon Steak. 94-96 Bourke Street, Melbourne (03) 9639 8444 www.elephantandwheelbarrow.com.au
Irish Times Pub
With arguably Australia’s best Guinness on tap, this is a great pub to come and chill out with friends. Describing themselves as the best Irish pub in Melbourne, the Irish Times certainly manages to recreate the charm of Ireland, with live music every Friday from 8pm. 427 Little Collins Street, Melbourne (03) 9642 1699 www.theirishtimespub.com.au
The Commoner
This restaurant in Melbourne celebrates British Cuisine. Set up by Jo Corrigan who previously worked as a chef in London, The Commoner serves traditional British dishes, such as black pudding and pheasant terrine. With roast dinner specials on offer any cravings for your mum’s cooking will quickly vanish. 122 Johnston Street, Fitzroy (03) 9415 6876 www.thecommoner.com.au
Perth
Best of British Shop
If you are looking for somewhere to buy all your favourite British groceries, confectionary and memorabilia then head to the Best of British store in Perth. Opened in 2005 by a couple from the North East of England, this shop offers all the things you crave most from back home. From Quality Street to Colmans Mint Sauce, Mustard, Marmite and English footy merchandise, this place stocks all of your heart’s desires. Don’t worry if you can’t get to Perth, you can place an order online. Shop 18, Floreat Forum, Howtree Place, Floreat (08) 9287 1186 www.bestofbritish.com.au
Peninsula Tea Gardens
Indulge in the greatest of British traditions at the Peninsula Tea Gardens. Located on the picturesque Swan River, treat yourself to Afternoon Tea in this stunning setting. For only $12.50 tuck into the Riverside Cream Tea which includes two freshly baked scones with whipped cream, gourmet preserve and a pot of tea. With an extensive menu including cakes, sandwiches and a variety of teas you will be spoilt for choice. Tranby (Peninsula Farm), Johnson Road, Maylands (08) 9272 8894 www.peninsulateagardens.com
Brisbane
Queensland Tennis Centre
The first game of tennis was played in Birmingham, England, in the late 19th century. Although tennis is now played worldwide, lawn tennis still remains a British institution. At Queensland Tennis Centre you can hire a grass court by the hour, so why not challenge friends to a game? With ball and racquet hire as well, this tennis club has everything you need for a traditional game. If you take your tennis seriously they offer adult coaching and competitions too. 190 King Arthur Terrace, Tennyson 1300 292 011 www.queenslandtenniscentre.com.au
Chumley Warner’s Traditional British Fish & Chips
If you’re desperately missing your local British Chippy, you’ll be pleased to know Brisbane holds the answer to your prayers. Chumley Warner’s serves up traditional fish and chips with gravy, curry sauce or mushy peas. They also stock Daddies Brown Sauce, chip shop vinegar and imported British cans. The English frying range ensures that true authentic chippy taste so you won’t be left disappointed. Aquatic Paradise Centre, Shop 8, 109 Birkdale Road, Birkdale (07) 3822 7787 www.chumleywarners.co.au
Pig ‘N’ Whistle
This pub is a popular haunt for expats in Australia. It has a great range of beers and an extensive menu. One of their most popular offerings is the Middlesbrough Parma Chicken Schnitzel, which is named thanks to regular ‘Teeside Trev’ who hounded the staff at the Pig ‘N’ Whistle to add the tasty treat to the menu. This is the closest you’ll get to a traditional British pub in Australia. Riverside Centre, 123 Eagle Street, Brisbane (07) 3832 9099 www.pignwhistle.com.au By Siobhan Way
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SYDNEY
Exotic Watering Holes Tiki cocktail culture is all the rage. While the stress of the daily grind gets you down, daydreams of distant tropical islands become more frequent. These dreams can become a reality in one of the many Tiki inspired bars in Sydney. With Polynesian culture influencing the style of many bars, there are plenty of places where you can step inside and forget your troubles. Imagine you are lying on a beach while sipping a delicious cocktail and for a short while all your worries will be swept away.
Bungalow 8
Sydney’s most renowned Polynesian bar is definitely Bungalow 8. The Tiki inspired cocktails are most definitely the bar’s pride and joy. From jugs of Pukapuka Punch with rum macadamia, apple, vanilla, lemon and ginger ale to jugs of South Pacific Sangria with apple vodka, ginger, pineapple and lemonade, the cocktails all have a Polynesian twist. The outdoor area shrouded in greenery certainly sets the atmospheric tone for this bar.3 Lime Street, Sydney (02) 9299 4660 bungalow8sydney.com
Zeta Bar
With playful drinks and a focus upon extreme cabaret, Zeta Bar offers escapism for all those in Sydney. The outdoor terrace allows you to make the most of the summer weather, truly adding to the tropical vibe. Sip on a Mai Tai while you rub shoulders with the A-listers. Nicole Ritchie, Hugh Jackman and Snoop Dogg have all partied here. Level 4, 488 George Street, Sydney (02) 9265 8374 www.zetabar.com.au
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Tiki Bar Kitchen
This Tiki themed bar serves soul food and an excellent mix of cocktails. The décor is the epitome of Polynesian style, creating a tropical hang out in the heart of Sydney. 110 Spring Street, Bondi Junction (02) 8021 8122 www.facebook.com/TikiBarKitchen
Hinky Dinks
Kitschy and fun, Hinky Drinks even sounds like something you would find in the 1960s. It is here that you can try the ‘Zombie’, the most infamous of Tiki drinks comes with a two drink limit per person due to its dangerous amounts of Rum and Absinth. 185 Darlinghurst Rd, Darlinghurst, 2010 (02) 8084 6379 www.hinkydinks.com.au
Rambutan
Although best known for being a restaurant, Rambutan is hiding a Tiki lounge downstairs. With a freshwater fish tank, bamboo seats and bamboo effect wallpaper, this cocktail bar really is a hidden treasure. The bar staff of Rambutan are cocktail
masterminds, with a signature cocktail list to rival the very best. 96 Oxford Street, Darlinghurst (02) 9360 7772 www.rambutan.com.au
The Rum Diaries
Even though it’s not technically a Tiki Bar, The Rum Diaries deserves a spot on the list. The clue is in the name, this bar places special emphasis on the quality of their rum, thus creating really great cocktails. 288 Bondi Road, Bondi (02) 9300 0440 www.therumdiaries.com.au
Gin Garden
For a bar set in an open-air oasis, head to Gin Garden on George Street. Not only is the cocktail list here extremely impressive, the Gin Garden serves over 25 types of gin. Ground Floor, Establishment, 252 George Street, Sydney (02) 9240 3100 merivale.com.au/gingarden
SYDNEY
BBQ In The City...
From flame grilled burgers to suculent steaks we’ve eaten our way around Sydney to find you the best BBQ’s in town. Plus we’re not going to try and shake the stereotype, the Aussies are good at BBQ-ing, so why not indulge whilst you’re here? Phillip’s Foote
The Blue Gum Hotel
The Oaks Hotel
Sweethearts Rooftop Barbeque
In the heart of The Rocks you’ll find Phillip’s Foote where you can flame grill your own steak on their Aussie BBQ. For $31 you’ll get a choice of steak, fish or chicken as well as a helping of bread, salad and potatoes. This communal BBQ is popular with locals and tourists alike, especially as the building is steeped in history. The former sailors bar now provides an enjoyable setting for a BBQ lunch or dinner. 101 George Street, The Rocks, Sydney (02) 9241 1485 www.phillipsfoote.com.au Enjoy the fantastic atmosphere of the Beer Garden while you take your pick of juicy steaks and chicken kebabs. With an excellent selection of meat and fish you can cook your choice to your own personal taste. All BBQ meals include a jacket potato, fresh salad, a bread roll as well as a selection of condiments from the dijon and chilli to the herb and garlic butter. Located under a magnificent Oak tree, The Oaks Hotel boasts a beautiful setting and a great ambiance. 118 Military Road, Neutral Bay (02) 9953 5515 www.oakshotel.com.au
Tuck into steaks straight off the BBQ at The Blue Gum Hotel. They also host trivia nights and run weekly drinks promotions, allowing you to make the most of your visit. Priding themselves on the quality of their steaks you will not be disappointed by their offerings. Boasting three outdoor areas, you can really make the most of the summer weather at this venue. 55 Pacific Highway, Waitara, Sydney (02) 9489 3220 www.bluegumhotel.com.au
This is a great place to hang out with friends. Order plenty of food for your table and everyone can tuck in to a bit of everything. From glazed pork belly and crispy lamb ribs to salmon skewers and shrimps on the barbie there is something for everyone. Sweethearts BBQ is an interesting cross between a pub, nightclub and rooftop bar, with great food and a vibrant atmosphere this is a venue that is definitely worth checking out. 33-37 Darlinghurst Road, Potts Point (02) 9368 7333 www.sweetheartsbbq.com.au
Verandah Main Bar & BBQ
Throughout the working week Verandah offer great BBQ specials; our favourite is Monday’s $10 Rump Steaks deal. With an extensive BBQ menu you can enjoy great food from Monday to Friday between 12pm and 9pm. The BBQ menu changes seasonally so you can always expect the best produce. 55-65 Elizabeth Street, Sydney (02) 9239 5888 www.verandah.com.au
Paju BBQ
If you are looking for something a little different on your BBQ, pay a visit to Paju BBQ. In the restaurant you’ll sample delicious Korean food, so while you may not be outside soaking up the weather you will be tucking into a BBQ that is excellent value for money. This place is perfect for those on a budget as it has a BYOB policy. Level 1/ 196 King Street, Newtown (02) 9517 2772 www.facebook.com/pajubbq
Pontoon Bar
For a great value barbecue, Pontoon Bar offers everything you could possibly need. With a great menu inspired by the good old Aussie BBQ, you’ll certainly have an enjoyable time. As well as food, there are great tunes on Thursdays, Fridays and Saturdays from great DJs. Enjoy it all while you overlook Cockle Bay Wharf. Promenade North, Cockle Bay Wharf, Sydney (02) 9267 7099 www.facebook.com/pontoonbar
The Beresford Hotel
On a Sunday head to The Beresford Hotel. Out in the beer garden you’ll find a buffet BBQ for $25 a plate. From 12pm to 4pm this BBQ Sunday lunch provides an ideal setting for a catch up with friends. With wood-fired BBQs and a spit roast you can take in the great weather on a Sunday afternoon while you enjoy delicious food. 354 Bourke Street, Surry Hills (02) 8313 5000 www.merivale.com.au/theberesfordhotel By Siobhan Way
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Monday
Tuesday
Jacksons On George 176 George Street $1 Pool Bungalow 8 3 Lime Street King St Wharf Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday $10 The Office Hotel meals Cnr Kent and Erskine Streets The Eastern 2-4-1 Schnitzels & 500 Oxford Street Pasta Bondi Junction $4 Beers & Wine 5-7pm
Cock ‘N’ Bull Bondi Junction Monday $4 Magners, $6 meals
The Orient 89 George Street The Rocks $10 burgers all day
Wednesday
Thursday
Balcone At The Junction Women’s Wednesdays from 7.30 pm
Bat & Ball 495 Cleveland St, Surry Hills Wacky Wednesdays $10 Monteith Pale Ale Jugs, $5 vodka & wine
White Horse Hotel 385 Crown St Surry Hills $10 Cocktails”
The Palace Hotel 730-742 George St $10 Meal Deals Daily
Friday
Saturday
Darlo Bar 306 Liverpool Street Meat Tray Raffle 5-6pm
Propaganda World Bar 24 Bayswater Rd, Kings Cross $5 entry 9pm-5am
Manly Wharf East Esplanade $16 Pizza with free local beer or house wine
$5 U-Call-Its. You seel it, you like it, U-Call-It. Entire back bar $5. 7pm - Midnight
The Porterhouse 233 Riley Street Surry Hills Breakfast 10am-4pm El Loco 64 Foveaux Street, Surry Hills $5 Tacos every day Coach & Horses 147 Avoca Street Randwick Poker from 2pm – $750 prize pool Slip In 111 Sussex Street Friday half price drinks from 5pm-7pm World Bar, MUM 24 Bayswater Road Kings Cross Indie Club Nigh $15/10pm.
Sunday The Beach Palace 169 Dolphin Street Coogee Rooftop Sounds, Live Entertainment from 4pm $15 Meals
Brown Sugar 106 Curlewis Street, Bondi Breakfast all day $15 Moroccan eggs
The Abercrombie 100 Broadway, $10 Deep House Sunday session Paddington Market 395 Oxford Street, Paddington Market from 10am
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SYDNEY
Unearthing Kings Cross
Full of bright lights and dark corners, Kings Cross is intriguing, upcoming and an exciting place to live and party. BBM looks into “The Cross” way of life and all the area has to offer… Once thought of as the sordid and shady quarter of Sydney, Kings Cross is rapidly evolving into one of the most vibrant pockets of the city. Although the area is most known for being Sydney’s red light district, with the arrival of a number of stylish and trendy establishments, from cafes to quirky bookshops, Kings Cross has quickly become a hotspot for people from all walks of life. While you may need to be on your guard, this is a place that is definitely worth a visit. Known locally as ‘The Cross’ it houses a range of great clubs, bars and restaurants. The term “heading to The Cross” is not specifically a description of the geographical area, but more of a way of life for people visiting the area. This area of Sydney expresses a lifetime of colour, variety, diversity and most of all a captivating history of culture and crime. The bohemians and artists, creatives and writers, have mostly resided in the Kings Cross area due to the quirky existence it holds. Whilst in the past, crime levels were sky high, tainted by drugs and corrupt policing throughout the community, Kings Cross is still the darker side of Sydney, yet has a much cleaner approach with an intriguing soul these days. The sinister ‘Underworld’ Queen of Kings Cross; Madam Kate Leigh is the fascinating historical
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character who played a huge part in the state of the Kings Cross culture for many years. Throughout the years of 1919 to 1955, Leigh’s main enterprise was the highly profitable sly-grog trade (alcohol), cocaine distribution and hotels. During her heyday, Kate Leigh owned and operated more than thirty different sly-grog hotels at different locations in inner Sydney that generated thousands of pounds in profit annually. She was also a prominent figure in the Razor Gang war movements of the 1920s. Due to the passage of the Pistol licensing Act (NSW) in 1922, this created a sudden surge of gang members choosing razors as preferred weapons to leave a mark of scarring or worse. English born Prostitute turned Madam herself, Tilly Devine, also a gangleader and dealer in the prime of Sydney’s Kings Cross crime era was the rival of Madam Leigh. Also extremely wealthy due to her involvement with illegal crimes and organisations, Devine would bribe the police out of imprisonment charges for a reign of nearly 50 years from 1920 onwards. Post World War II, Kings Cross filled with cafes and specialized grocery stores for the influx of different communities and soldiers, along came the bars and
the afterhours strip clubs to suit the new clientele. So you can see how the area started shaping up into the dynamic and quirky spot it is today. Interestingly in 1978 a protest march against the police harassment of gay and lesbians resulted in 53 arrests in Kings Cross and turned into a full on riot, which would forever be remembered in the form of the annual world renowned Mardi Gras parade, which people the world over, flock to each year. Since the mid-1990s, Kings Cross has undergone a huge amount of refurbishments of both the historical landmarks and apartment buildings. A severe demographic change occurred as real estate development occurred and a change of clientele to the area appeared. Kings Cross today tells a very different story to its seedy past; however, it still holds a darker undertone to its neighbouring suburbs that often excites its visitors.
SYDNEY
Unearthing Kings Cross... Eating Around Kings Cross
For a great Mexican meal, served up with a side of tequila, head to Barrio Chino on Bayswater Road. With a late night menu offering delights such as Tex Mex nachos and a variety of tacos, they have a variety of dishes for you at any time of the day. For something a little more refined visit Gastro Park on Roslyn Street. Described as ‘the playground of good food’ they focus on delivering quality, freshness and innovation. It has a great location in a spectacular building with great views. Otherwise take a walk down Macleay Street, where you’ll find a number of cafes and restaurants dotted around which suits all budgets. If you’re down on Victoria Street then Miss G’s is an absolute must. As you enter through a door oozing pink neon light you’ll find four floors of unexpected dining; including a graffiti wall, communal tables and even a veggie garden courtyard, whilst you enjoy the amazing Japanese flavoured dishes. There’s also a kooky bar upstairs where you can devour cocktails once you’ve lined your stomach. Watermoon on Victoria Street is also a great place to grab a bite, they also cater for big groups so great if there is a bunch of you. The prices here are modest, and they serve up some good traditional Japanese food. Their set menu will set you back around $35 and with $3 for BYO, it’s a great place to start your evening off before a big night out.
Drink and Play
On Bayswater Road you’ll come across The World Bar. This popular Sydney hang-out is housed within
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a four storey converted Victorian terrace and offers various rooms, booths, stairwells and hidden areas which you can explore. Famous for their extravagant décor and Teapot Cocktails, as soon as you step inside you will understand what all the fuss is about. If you are desperately seeking a pub where you can sit back, watch the football and drink a beer then Crest Sports Bar is the place for you. Situated on Darlinghurst Road, they have a 100-inch monster of a plasma screen as well as an assortment of amusement machines and pool tables.
Harbour and The Opera House. The stylish, selfcontained apartments also include use of an outdoor swimming pool, gym and BBQ area. Prices range from $190 to $650 per room per night and can sleep up to six people.
With several floors, each filled with fantastic bars in their own right, Kings Cross Hotel has everything you could need for a night out. From the rooftop bar’s $10 cocktails between 5pm and 7pm Thursday through to Sunday, to the basement bar with a jukebox that time forgot, you’ll run out of time trying to figure out all the fun that this place provides.
In Elizabeth Bay you can rent a two-bedroom apartment for $460 a week. This is a great option if you’re looking to share with friends. With the CBD within walking distance, this is a lovely and quaint area surrounding Kings Cross.
Living Around Kings Cross
Kings Cross Backpackers offers a bed in a mixed dorm from $30. With free airport pickup, free breakfast, free Wi-Fi, lots of entertainment and plenty of communal areas including a spacious rooftop this hostel has everything you need for a budget stay in Kings Cross. You can also find backpacker accommodation at Funk House Hostel. With dorm rooms from $24 a night and private doubles from $71 this is a great budget option. Located on Darlinghurst Road in Potts Point, it is also in a great position for making the most of a stay in Sydney. For luxury accommodation in Kings Cross the Macleay Apartments are ideally located in Potts Point and showcase stunning views of Sydney
If you’re looking to stay in Kings Cross long term, a one bedroom flat on Darlinghurst Road will cost around $360 per week. This is an ideal location, putting you in the heart of Kings Cross with only a very short walk to Kings Cross Station.
A two-bedroom flat in Potts Point will cost a little more than Elizabeth Bay at $650 per week. With a much more central location, you’ll be a lot closer to the fantastic cafes, restaurants, bars and transport services.
How to Get There
Kings Cross is very accessible due to its excellent transport links. Kings Cross Station is on the Eastern Suburbs and Illawarra line, with connections to Bondi Junction, Hurstville, Mortdale, Sutherland, Cronulla, Waterfall, Thirroul and Port Kembla. It also has great connections to Sydney Airport. If you want to travel from Sydney Circular Quay to Kings Cross jump on the 323 bus via Elizabeth Street, or you can walk. As Kings Cross has a central location it is within walking distance of many areas of Sydney. By Siobhan Way
MELBOURNE
Best BBQ’s in Melbourne Although Australia is famed for BBQ’s on the beach, there is no need to feel left out in Melbourne. Even in the heart of the city there are plenty of places you can go to enjoy barbecued food this summer. From beer gardens to Argentinian Restaurants, we’ve hunted out the best venues offering delicious charcoal grilled treats to give you that real taste of summer. The Brunswick Hotel
Every Sunday you’ll find the Super Summer Sunday Cider Sessions taking place at The Brunswick Hotel. With live acoustic music, cheap cider deals and a BBQ – what more could you want for winding down your weekend? From midday you can sample excellent food and chill out in the beer garden listening to some great live bands. 140 Sydney Road, Brunswick (03) 9387 6637 www.brunswickhotel.net
Riverland Bar and Café
Enjoy a BBQ on the Yarra, with organic sausages, sauerkraut, onions and sweet tomato sauce. This outdoor BBQ is a big hit, especially due to its great location. With historic surroundings, Riverland Bar and Café is an ideal location to relax and take in great views, perfect for the summer season. Vaults 1-9 Federation Wharf, Melbourne (03) 9662 1771 www.riverlandbar.com
Big Boy BBQ
For the ultimate barbecue dinner head to Big Boy BBQ. This BBQ joint offers a selection of mouthwatering smoked BBQ meat platters with a variety of wings, ribs and fillets. This place takes BBQ-ing seriously so you can expect a delicious feast, for a $1 charge per person it is also BYOB so head on down and stuff your faces. 764 Glenhuntly Road, Caulfield South (03) 9523 7410 www.bigboybbq.com.au
Newmarket Hotel
Enjoy wood BBQ’d steaks at the Newmarket Hotel. This is the perfect place if you are looking for that delicious BBQ taste but a fine dining experience. With their dry aged 100% natural pasture fed Victorian black Angus beef and exotic seasonings you will not be disappointed. The pork ribs with Mr Wilson’s BBQ sauce are also really tasty. 34 Inkerman Street, St Kilda (03) 9537 1777 www.newmarketstkilda.com.au
San Telmo
Not really a conventional BBQ San Telmo offers traditional Argentine cooking, but with tasty dishes and a 2.5 metre char-grill we felt it deserved to make the list. The fire and smoke from the char-grill create fantastic flavours that embody any true Argentinian menu. With calamari, spiced sausage and braised Berkshire pork with crackling all on offer, be transported to Argentina this summer with their exotic menu on offer. Make sure you don’t snack beforehand as this is a real feast to gorge yourself on. 14 Meyers Place, Melbourne (03) 9650 5525 www.santelmo.com.au
Palmz at The Carlton
Palmz Rooftop Bar is the perfect location for soaking up the sun and enjoying cocktails whilst surrounded by palm trees. If you’re looking to hold an event then Palmz is a great choice. With a BBQ function menu on offer, you and your friends or colleagues can tuck into a gourmet banquet of Bratwurst sausage, grilled chimichangas, prawns, lamb ribs and corn on the cob. Start planning the greatest BBQ party. 193 Bourke Street, Melbourne (03) 9663 3246 www.thecarlton.com.au
The Commoner
For Sunday lunch head to The Commoner in Fitzroy where you can enjoy a Wood Grill cooked in the fire of their garden. Eat out in the courtyard, which is just the place to sit out in over the summer months. With an emphasis on British food, this place is sure to give you a taste of home. They also boast an extensive selection of cocktails and beers. 122 Johnston Street, Fitzroy (03) 9415 6876 www.thecommoner.com.au
BBQ Nation
With the promise of charcoal grilled perfection, BBQ Nation sets the bar pretty high. With an Indian twist, the restaurant certainly offers delicious BBQ’d food. Their grill your own menu allows diners to baste and grill their meat and veg at their own live table grill. This is an excellent choice for vegetarians who want a part of the BBQ action, but don’t want to be restricted by meat grilling. . 16/111 Cecil Street, South Melbourne (03) 9682 1916 www.bbqnation.com.au
By Siobhan Way
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MELBOURNE
Tiki Bars In Town...
You may be stuck in the city this summer but there are plenty of places in Melbourne that offer a little escapism. Across the city you’ll find a number of Tiki themed bars where you can be transported to a Polynesian Paradise. With palm trees, carved tiki mugs, and fruity cocktails you can leave your stress at the door and for a short while imagine you are somewhere else entirely. This is the perfect getaway but with very little travel involved. Tiki Lounge and Bar
For authentic Tiki cocktails and atmosphere head to Tiki Bar in Richmond. With extravagant Tiki presentation and excellent attention to detail you’ll be transported to an exotic paradise. Sip the fabulous cocktails while you enjoy late night professional cabaret performances. From 5-8.30pm make the most of happy hour, with $12 cocktails. For those who aren’t cocktail enthusiasts, happy hour also offers 2-4-1 on wine and beer. The bar is also home to Sidewalk Tango Dance School. 327 Swan Street, Richmond (03) 9428 4336 www.tikiloungeandbar.com
LuWow
Decked out in true Tiki style, LuWow offers an amazing adventure through the islands of the Pacific. With a selection of exquisite rums on offer the cocktails are simply divine. On Fridays and Saturdays from 8pm, enjoy great music and a bit of dancing in The Forbidden Temple. If you are looking for something more secluded take your drinks to The Island Village where you can sit back in individual huts and take in the exotic atmosphere. 62-70 Johnston Street, Fitzroy (03) 9417 5447 www.theluwow.com
The Order Of Melbourne – Rooftop Terrace
Escape from the rush of the city and venture onto the rooftop terrace of The Order Of Melbourne. This exquisite bar, known for divine cocktails and quirky decor, is hiding a small Tiki bar on the rooftop. Here you can enjoy the summer evenings while you imagine you are lounging in a tropical paradise. Level 2, 401 Swanston Street, Melbourne (03) 9663 6707 www.facebook.com/order.rooftop
Lane’s Edge
While Melbourne enjoys excellent weather this summer, pay a visit to the outdoor eating area at Lane’s Edge on Bourke Street. This place is perfect if you want to chill out and has an understated Tiki theme. With just a few special touches, like a bar that resembles a Tiki hut and lots of greenery you will feel as though you have left Melbourne for a short while.
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This place has a fully stocked bar and a relaxed atmosphere, so you can sit back, slurp, relax and pretend you are somewhere else entirely. 39 Bourke Street, Melbourne (03) 9654 2409 www.lanesedge.com
Golden Monkey
Everything about the Golden Monkey screams exciting, extraordinary and exotic. At heart it is an Asian tapas restaurant but its pride and joy is the innovative cocktail bar. With a dedication to Tiki cocktail culture, this place has done their research and when it comes to cocktails they really know their stuff. The eclectic interior will transport you to the Orient of yesteryear, perfect for those looking for a little escapism after a long hard day at work, or to shake up a weekend with a foreign and exciting twist. 389 Lonsdale Street, Melbourne (03) 9602 2055 www.goldenmonkey.com.au
The Butterfly Club
The Butterfly Club really is a tropical paradise. Decorated with antique furniture, statuesque trees, fairy lights and of course butterflies, this will be unlike any place you have ever been before. But The Butterfly Club isn’t just about appearances; they have a superb cocktail list to back it up. BBM recommend Sparkling Sunset or Urban Legend, although all of their offerings are delicious. 204 Bank Street, South Melbourne (03) 9690 2000 www.thebutterflyclub.com
SweatShop Bar
SweatShop is a hidden den boasting out of this world Mai Tai’s below Seamstress Restaurant. Housed in a 115-year-old former textile factory, this is an unexpected location for one of Melbourne’s best bars. Open Fridays and Saturdays, SweatShop isn’t decked out in extravagant Tiki furnishings like many others in Melbourne, but it has a great vibe. This is a great place to enjoy great drinks over the weekend whilst you take in the unusual decor. 113 Lonsdale Street, Melbourne (03) 9662 9286 www.sweatshopbar.com.au
By Siobhan Way
Monday
Tuesday
Wednesday
29 Sydney Rd, Brunswick $15 Parma and pot or wine
Duke of Kent 293 La Trobe Street Parma and pot $15
Corner Hotel 301 High St Northcote All day $5 glasses of wine
Workshop 1/413 Elizabeth Street Melbourne $8 Lasagne Pugg Mahones
106-112 Hardware Street Melbourne Mad Mondays $5
drink specials + $12 for 2 Jaeger or AGWA bombs
Ruby Tuesdays
$10 Pasta & Wine 217 Chapel St, Prahan
The Carlton 193 Bourke Street, $14 Steak Dinner Porterhouse w crinkle cut chips &
Thursday
Friday
Bimbo Deluxe 376 Brunswick St Fitzroy $4 Pizzas 12-4pm
Bridie O’Reileys
Robert Burns Hotel 376 Smith Street, Collingwood Huevos Rotos $15.90 Baked eggs with green asparagus, confit mushroom and truffle oil
every weekday.
La Di Da Monday-Thursday: lunch & dinner $10.00 all Pizzas $12.50 Chicken Parmas $15.00 250 gram Sirloin Steaks $15.00 Burgers your choice Beef/ Chicken/Vegetable
New Guernica $2 pots Thursday 10pm- 12am, $4 vodka soda 1am 5am, $6 spirits all night
E Fifty Five Basement 55 Elizabeth Street $4 Becks 4-7pm
Turf Bar 131 Queen Street, Melbourne Parmageddon Cafe, Gallery, Wednesdays, taste the Parmas of the world Cinema for $15 361 Lt Lonsdale St
Saturday
PJ O’Briens $7 pints of Guinness, 2 for 1 for cocktails from 5pm until 7pm
The Local Taphouse 184 Carlisle Street St Kilda Live Music
St Kilda Beach
House 109 Barkly Street St Kilda Rooftop Party for guests and locals in our stunning rooftop Bar that overlooks St Kilda – Free entry for in house guests – $5 Draught – $5 Vodkas – $5 Bulmers - Open until 3am
Bar Etiquette 5- 9pm any day of the week - $2.50 for a pot, $5 for a pint and $10 for a jug of Coopers lager, Melbourne ranga red ale (a local brew) or Gypsy Pear Cider.
Sunday
Lucky Coq Free BBQ, koppaberg cider $10 per pint All week $4 hotdogs and $4 pizza
29th Apartment 29 Fitzroy St St Kilda $3 Fish & Chips $5 Beer and Wine 6-10pm
Elephant & Wheelbarrow Bourke St Melbourne’s only Sunday Carvery
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MELBOURNE
The St Kilda Scene
BBM takes a look into what St Kilda has to offer, from great places to grab a drink or chilling at the beach, here’s what we’ve discovered... St Kilda is Melbourne’s seaside playground covering the expansive view of Port Phillip and is a favourite spot of both residents and visitors alike. Palm trees, breath taking sunsets, sandy beaches and attractive architecture all come as standard around St Kilda where you immediately feel at home. With plenty to do, see, eat and drink around the area, this cultural centre is bursting with arts and entertainment hang-outs. Quite a quirky area with a focus on the arts and music scene, there used to be a seedy side to St Kilda but now this has reformed into a bustling area for everyone.
Drink and Play
For delicious Latin Street Food and Mexican lunch specials, Newmarket St Kilda is one of the oldest establishments in the area and has a top reputation for its food and wine list. The Espy is also one of the better known venues in the area with a thriving kitchen, bar and live music room. Renowned all over Australia for its top line ups for events and a great party vibe, The Espy is a venue, which becomes a second home to many of those who decide to reside in St Kilda. The Local Taphouse is European inspired and perfect for those summer afternoons in a beer garden. Trivia and live music is a standard night at the Local Taphouse and drinks are well priced for the entertainment provided. The food menu is varied and covers dishes such as the roast pumpkin risotto. This is a great meeting place with a welcoming atmosphere. Do not forget to hit the St Kilda Markets throughout the year also as something alternative to do. There are many festivals such as Southside Handmade and Vintage market, the Veg Out market and the Esplanade Market. A Highlight throughout January is the St Kilda Twilight market where the O’Donnell Gardens come to life at night creating a nocturnal zone of beautiful and unique things to do, buy, eat and drink.
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Dining
Lentil As Anything is a unique non-profit organisation, which runs three establishments across Melbourne. This is a ‘pay-as-you-feel’ venue, which allows people to eat the food, and only pay what they think it’s the worth. This covers their A La Carte menu, and also their vegan and vegetarian selections. The food is of a respectable quality and very well run by volunteers from the surrounding community. Who said that the weekends couldn’t start on a Thursday? With happy hours 5 till 7 pm on a Thursday and Friday, head down to Captain Baxters and enjoy a drink before a delicious feast of jerk chicken and platters. Their balcony creates magical moments whilst the sun is setting over the horizon and you have a cocktail in hand with cocktail nibbles on the side. Perfection. The Cushion Lounge is a creation for those on more of a budget when it comes to eating out. With nightly deals such as their $5 pizza night or their $10 Parma and pot, their venue is full of young travellers most evenings who are looking for good food and a good time.
Accommodation
St Kilda is not only a holiday destination; it provides a habitable safe haven for people from all walks of life. St Kilda Beach House on Barkly Street in St Kilda Beach is five minutes from the beach itself and right at the heart of the action with fashionable cafes and shops surrounding it. With free entertainment throughout the week and a nightly rate from $29 on certain January dates, this is a feel good hostel with some great offers such as a free hot pancake breakfast, free lockers, free linen and luggage storage as standard. Home to St Kilda’s best rooftop bar and food and drink offers every day to make going out as guilt-free as possible. St Kilda Beach House provides the community with great food and parties most nights of the week. You can also do your RSA here for only $50.
Habitat HQ is known throughout Melbourne for its top location and welcoming feel. If you want to feel like you are part of a fun and vibrant community, Habitat HQ in St Kilda Beach is the perfect place to stay for the beginning of your Melbourne time whilst you find something more long term. From $34 a night in high summer season, each room has clean linen, comfy beds, luggage lock up and free breakfasts. Stay at the Beach House at the Vibe building on Acland Street for a comfortable modern stay in St Kilda. For a week to rent these amazing apartments which sleep five people in a two bedroomed apartment, depending on the season is around $1000 a week which works out great if you are part of a big group. There are smaller places available such as beautiful one-bedroom apartments, which work out at around $600 per week. These are all based on a week minimum stay and no longer than two months. For longer-term rentals, one-bedroom apartments can be rented for around $300 per week; twobedroomed places are great for saving money if there are four of you as you can rent a stylish apartment for around $460 per week. A top of the range three-bedroom apartment in St Kilda averages at $700 per week. Living in St Kilda is very good value for money and has a great community feel to it with people of all ages residing here.
How to get to St Kilda
There are two convenient airport shuttle buses to connect Melbourne Airport and St Kilda. With St Kilda standing only six km southeast from Melbourne’s central business district, it is in the perfect location to easily venture into the bustling city centre, which makes Melbourne life that bit more convenient. Tram routes 96 from Bourke Street, tram 112 from Collins Street and tram 16 from Swanston Street, all service St Kilda and are around 25 minutes from the city. The Bayside Trail off-road bicycle network connects through St Kilda. By Frankie Salt
S T
K I L D A
B E A C H
H O U S E
1 0 9 BA R K LY S T R E E T — S T K I L DA V I C 3 1 8 2 03 9525 3371 info@stkildabeachhouse.com
w w w. s t k i l d a b e a c h h o u s e . c o m . a u
ST KILDA BEACH HOUSE
THE PUBLIC BAR
Amazing St Kilda location
Monday - Friday $5 pizzas!
Featuring St Kilda’s premier rooftop bar Beds 6, 8, 10 share dorms & twins or doubles FREE Airport shuttle if you book 3 consecutive nights or more* *Subject to times www.airportbusdandenong.com.au FREE Internet wi – fi 30 minutes on arrival FREE Breakfast daily, pancakes (Wed) FREE Beach house t – shirt if you stay 7 days FREE Pool from 7am – 3pm Monday – Friday Work available across our three bars! Do your RSA here for $50!
Monday - Friday $10 jugs 3pm – 8pm Main meals from $11 everyday! Monday – trivia and loose games $500 in travel prizes every week! $150 in bar tab prizes Wednesday – poker tournament NEXT LEVEL ROOF TOP BAR facebook.com/hotelbarklyfridaysthepeoplesparty
Friday & Saturday – live entertainment Sunday – karaoke $300 in cash prizes!
TRAVEL AGENCY AND JOB CLUB RIGHT NEXT DOOR!
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TRAVEL AUSTRALIA
Diving & Snorkeling in Australia
Beneath the glassy surface of the ocean lurks a world that is just waiting to be discovered. Australia is a haven of deep ocean experiences, whether you are novice or an expert, seeking an experience or the adventure of a lifetime, Australia offers the perfect playing ground. With nothing but the clear, calm aquatic surroundings around you, bubbles quickly rising to the surface, the bright and thriving coral combined with the array of mesmerizing sea life, as you leave the familiar terra firma surroundings and delve into the deep blue unknown. Image courtesy of www.rodneyfox.com.au Shark diving experts in South Australia The feeling of weightless tranquility, reminiscent of the fish surrounding you, encapsulates the world that we as humans can forget exists. With so many different awe inspiring dive spots surrounding Australia, divers flock from far and wide to take on different opportunities at all levels of cost, experience, recreation and expediency. With only the tank on your back, and breathing apparatus to extend the length of time under water, you may decide to take just a few hours out of everyday life to lose yourself within this dreamlike surrounding. From the coast of New South Wales to the Ningaloo reef, South Australia to the furthest points of the Northern Territory, there is a unique under water experience for you to encounter. There are also plenty of indoor dive centres throughout Australia if you want some convenient fun and practice before letting loose in the great oceanic mass. Here are some of the best and most interesting diving experiences throughout Australia.
Neptune Islands, SA Shark diving
Surprisingly, no diver qualification is needed to go face to face with these amazing predators in their natural environment. South Australia is celebrated as the prime location for shark diving. Companies such as Rodney Fox (the company is owned by
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the dare devil who pioneered shark diving 60 years ago) and another local business, Calypso Star Charters, will tutor you and give extensive knowledge surrounding the biology and research of these fish. Take to the ocean floor with Rodney Fox, the one and only exclusive company in the world to have the ability to take you to the untouched points at the deepest parts of the ocean floor to see the sharks in all their glory. Swim with the spectacular Leafy Sea Dragons (and weedy sea dragons), the incomparable Australian sea lion and other species of fish that you would not know were in existence. Both companies venture towards the beautiful Neptune Islands from Port Lincoln. Calypso Star Charters also have a newly built custom vessel to feel comfortable and at ease when spending the duration upon the live aboard boat.
Darwin, NT Crocodile diving
Swimming with the Northern Territory Saltwater Crocodile may not be everyone’s cup of tea. However, lowered into the water in a large acrylic cube where you are safe from harm and only centimetres from these fascinating reptiles is an experience of a lifetime. Right in the heart of Darwin’s central tourist precinct, you will come across the world’s largest display of Australia’s reptiles. Crocosaurus Cove allows you to dive into the waters with crocodiles in captivity, with the crocs being so close to the cage that the whole experience is extremely exhilarating. The ‘cage of
death’ as it is so reassuringly called allows you to enter with a friend also in the same cage. A crane lowers you into three different croc enclosures, where you spend approximately five minutes each, creating the feeling that you are simply free to swim alongside these 18-foot monsters!
Snorkel Safari run guided tours with this amazing equipment, and no previous experience is needed. They will explain how to use the device, one switch of a button and you will be gliding through the water, allowing you to experience and see more than you ever thought possible. If you’re hiring a sea scooter, or using your own, make sure you check the maximum depth for the device. It’s unlikely that you’d use a sea scooter too far down that it would rupture, but this is a risk and you should always check first before heading out into the water.
South West Rocks, NSW - Fish Rock Cave Diving
MacKay Reef, QLD Turtle Diving
South West Rocks Dive Centre runs daily dive trips to Fish Rock Cave, which is approximately 2km from the South West Rocks. As you enter the tunnel leading to the cave you’ll pass wobbegong sharks and a large bull ray resting on the ocean floor. Soon you’ll discover a world of the unknown with critically endangered Grey Nurse Sharks, and some of the world’s craziest looking and rare fish. As silhouettes of the coral, Trumpet Fish and thousands of other
vibrant species appear as you plunge down into the underwater cave, the surroundings appear almost supernatural - unveiling breathtaking beauty. The centre of Fish Rock is a 125m long cave, which opens into a cave that even the most expert of divers would be astounded by.
Ningaloo Reef, WA Scuba Diving
The Ningaloo Reef Marine Park is the largest fringing coral reef in Australia. The variety of fish here is endless, with common sightings of Green Turtles, Manta Rays, Dolphins, Dugong, and even Reef Sharks. Due to the current here, there is an unusually large amount of Plankton, allowing Whalesharks to breed here profusely, with a lot of Wthe Whalesharks growing up to 18 metres, they are a mammoth sight to behold. The Western Australian coast is a hidden gem with the most colourful of reefs and exciting marine life. The staff at Ningaloo Reef Dive are all PADI trained and so passionate about the surrounding underwater life, which makes each and every trip a unique experience.
Mackay Reef is synonymous with turtle spotting and offers a plethora of exotic coral and a generous selection of fish for you to snap photos of. Mackay Reef is one of the few reefs in Australia that has not been subject to damage by way of human interference. Feel like you are part of ‘Finding Nemo’ as you swim alongside fascinating turtles within a completely natural habitat. Seven species of sea turtle are found throughout the oceans across the world and six of these live and nest in Queensland, Australia making this a dream area to see these fascinating creatures out in the unspoilt wild. Turtles can live to over 150 years out in the wild and come in all shapes and sizes, making them one of the most sought after creatures to see out in the water. All species of sea turtle are considered to be endangered or vulnerable and so Mackay has a great turtle watch protection association to make sure that the reef, turtles and other species of marine life are kept safe from harm.
QLD - Ocean Safari
There are very few experiences to be had where you can take in the vista of two world heritage sights side by side. Head out to the horizon with Ocean Safari where within 25 minutes you will snorkel in two fabulous locations at Mackay and Undine Reefs. Their purpose built Safari boats are comfortable and spacious with only a maximum group of 25 persons going out to sea at one time. Ocean Safari staff will ensure that your trip is full of unbelievable sights, natural beauty and full of marine and bird life. Their trips are just half a day in duration, making it the perfect trip to squeeze in over a weekend break or before you head to your next destination.
Sydney, NSW Snorkel Sarafi
Allow the battery operated underwater scooter do all the hard work as you make your way through the depths. Do it James Bond style with your super slick hand held machine to glide you through the Sydney coastline.
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TRAVEL AUSTRALIA
The Great Bars of Brisbane The bar scene in Brisbane is one of the reasons this city has become such a popular destination. From unusual and exotic bars to traditional English pubs, Brisbane has a bit of everything to suit your mood. In this thriving city you’ll not just be confronted by excellent drinks selections, and weekly special deals, but there’s also some great food available in this cosmopolitan metropolis. Oh and did we mention the weather? That’s great too! Here are some of our favourite haunts to frequent if you need a little inspiration on where to kick back, relax and socialise for a little bit of light escapism...
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BRISBANE Calypso Bar
Calypso Bar is Brisbane’s best tequila joint. With drink and food deals throughout the week, Calypso is ideal for those on a budget. From $2 Taco Tuesday to Margarita Madness Friday, Calypso is a great destination mid week. 26 Caxton Street, Brisbane (07) 3369 7822 www.calypsobar.com.au
Cloudland
Cloudland is a tropical paradise tucked away in Fortitude Valley. Set amongst the leaves of 5000 plants and boasting a retractable glass roof this is a great place to enjoy a drink of two in the sunshine. The décor exudes extravagance and enchantment, thus creating one of Brisbane’s most interesting bars and a great venue for a night out. 641 Ann Street, Fortitude Valley, Brisbane (07) 3872 6600 www.katarzyna.com.au/venues/cloudland
White Lightning
One of the newest bars in town, White Lightning is a Tiki Inspired haven for those wanting to escape to more tropical shores. Recreating paradise in Brisbane, this bar is the latest themed venue to open here, describing itself as ‘the original Brisbane Tiki experience’. With an emphasis on excellent cocktails and South Pacific ideals, White Lightning is sure to be a great success. Corner of Alfred & Constance Streets, Fortitude Valley, Brisbane (07) 3257 7410 www.whitelightning.com.au
Alloneword
If you head to the outdoor area you’ll step into a graffiti covered playground. The perfect spot for the summer weather, Alloneword’s outdoor terrace has an urban vibe with live music and DJs on the decks. With excellent cocktails and elaborate furnishings this is a bar that offers an experience like no other. 188 Brunswick Street, Fortitude Valley, Brisbane (07) 1335 7047 www.alloneword.com.au
Lychee Lounge
For a taste of the exotic head to Lychee Lounge in the heart of Brisbane’s West End. This Eastern inspired bar offers up a variety of impressive cocktails. Taking mixology seriously, the bar staff of Lychee Lounge create extraordinary drinks with delicious flavours that are unlike any you have tried before. 2/94 Boundary Street, West End, Brisbane (07) 3846 0544 www.lycheelounge.com.au
The Bowler Bar
On Saturday nights head underground to The Bowler Bar. With an ‘industrial chic’ theme, this is an atmospheric bar with plenty of personality. Dance the night away while you mix with the stylish and hip crowd who frequent this bar. With dark secluded booths and a furry wall in the toilets, there is plenty to explore in this underground den. 388 Brunswick Street, Brisbane (07) 3666 5000 www.facebook.com/TheBowlerBar
The Pig ‘N’ Whistle
If you’re on the lookout for a traditional English pub you can’t go wrong with The Pig ‘N’ Whistle in Brisbane. Known for its excellent service, quality food, beverages and fun atmosphere, this is a great place to catch up on the football. They’ve also got a vast selection of beers on tap, and a fantastic a la carte menu. You won’t just find steak at The Pig ‘N’ Whistle, the starters include risotto balls and oysters, and if you’re looking for a lovely fresh and light meal, why not opt for the chargrilled lamb salad, or if you’re really hungry then there’s always a good old Cornish pasty to fill you up. At The Pig ‘N’ Whistle you might feel as though you are back in the UK, however the glorious weather will be a bit of a giveaway. Riverside Centre, 123 Eagle Street, Brisbane (07) 3832 9099 www.pignwhistle.com.au
Laruche
Drink in style in the flamboyant surroundings of Laruche. With an outrageous and eclectic mix of furnishings, this bar celebrates all that is peculiar and unusual. Serving up bespoke cocktails, this venue offers great entertainment with a jam-packed calendar of fantastic events. While some may view the décor as garish and over the top, however BBM like to celebrate the weird and wonderful, making this bar a firm favourite! 680 Ann Srreet, Fortitude Valley (07) 3666 0880 www.laruche.com.au By Siobhan Way
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GLOBAL WATCH
PARTY AROUND THE WORLD IN 2013
JUNE
Glastonbury Festival Glastonbury, UK
Stampedes of people young and old, venture down to the festival site to witness the majestic performances by musical legends from every genre, and with its fifteen stages there is heaps of talent flooding the venue’s sound system. When: 26th - 30th June 2013 Price: $323 Per Person More Info: www.glastonburyfestivals.co.uk
JULY
Tomorrow Land- Belgium
The best Techno, Dance and Electro Music Festival brought to you in Germany! If you’re looking for a buzz then jump on the Tomorrowland band wagon and head to Belgium this Summer! When: 27th – 29th July 2013 Price: $243- $799 Per Person More Info: www.tomorrowland.be
MAY
Sonar Festival - Barcelona, Spain
Sonar brings the best elements within the industry and brings them all together for you on one stage, music, playfulness, experimentation and most of all talent. When: 24th - 25th May 2013 Price: $218- $237 Per Person More Info: www.sonar.es
AUGUST
Burning Man San Francisco, USA
The Burning Man Festival is like no other you would have seen or heard about before. With no rules and regulations it’s up to every participant as an individual to decide what they will give to the festival as a community. When in full motion the venue is brimming with art installations, themed camps, gifts and costumes made for everyone and anyone to enjoy, you are the creator. However after the festival finishes in early September, the whole town is taken down, leaving no trace at all. When: 25th August - 2nd September 2013 Price: Still To Be Confirmed More Info: www.burningman.com
DECEMBER
Mysteryland Chile Santiago, Chile
Several stages, fantastic weather, and all manner of music. Enjoy one of the oldest Dutch Dance Festivals in the world in its sister home of Chile. When: 13-15th December 2013 (TBC) Price: $179 Per Person More Info: mysteryland.com
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FEBRUARY
Rio Carnival- Rio De Janeiro, Brazil
Rio Carnival is one of the world’s most famous street parade’s gathering thousands on the cobbles of Brazil to watch the spectacular show unfold each year. It should definitely be on your ‘To Do’ list for 2013! When: 9th - 12th February 2013 Price: $62 right up to $2600 More Info: www.rio-carnival.net
SEPTEMBER
OCTOBER
One of the best festivals in Germany with great headliners, you also gain entry to loads of Berlin clubs with your pass. When: 6-8th September 2013 Price: TBC More Info: Berlin.de
The biggest beer drinking festival on Earth. When: 21th September - 6th October 2013 Price: NA More Info: www.oktoberfest2013.com
Berlin Festival Berlin, Germany
Oktoberfest Munich, Germany
APRIL
Snowbombing- Mayrhofen, Austria Embedded into the village of Mayrhofen, Austria its beautiful grounds dusted in white snow will capture your eye just as much as the beats from the world’s best international DJs. When: 1st April- 6th April 2013 Price $491 Per Person More Info: www.snowbombing.com
MARCH
Future Music Festival Asia, Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia
Future Music Festival is back again with an almighty line-up like no other. DJ’s and international phenomena’s such as the Prodigy & DJ Fresh. When: 15th March - 16th March Price: $29- $37 More Info: www.futuremusicfestival.asia
NOVEMBER
Synergy Live, Villiersdorp South Africa
Hundreds of local and international bands come together between the city and the winelands for an awesome festival under the African skies. When: 30th November - 2nd December 2013 (TBC) Price: TBC More Info: www.facebook.com/Synergylive
JANUARY
Big Day Out - Sydney, Australia
If you’re looking for a day filled with brilliant music it doesn’t get better than this. When: 18th January 2013 Price: General Admission $165 or Like a Boss $265 More Info: www.sydney.bigdayout.com
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GLOBAL TRAVEL
The delights of Kuala Lumpur We know all our readers are globe-trotters, and when we say globe trotters, we don’t always mean that you’re into immersing yourselves in exotic cultures and learning the ways of the Ndebele Tribe, or teaching English to Vietnamese children; we know that you’re actually in fact international party boys and girls. That’s why we’re pleased to announce that Future Music Festival Asia will be taking place in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia on 14th March 2013. With this in mind, we explore all the other things you can do whilst in Kuala Lumpur if you’re thinking about heading out there.
If you are getting in the swing of this for Future Music’s Asia Festival you can expect acts such as Armin Van Buuren, ASOT 600, The Prodigy, Psy, Bloc Party, and Fun who will all heading to the Malaysian capital. There’s no excuse to not take a little break from Australia and hop on an eighthour flight to the wondrous city of Kuala Lumpur. Of course you can party your arses off whilst you’re there, and then you can regain some of that inner culture vulture by exploring the Malaysian terrain. Kuala Lumpur offers a bustling city where monkeys scamper close to sky-scrapers and the occasional deadly snake may well cross your path. Kuala Lumpur is a melting pot of cultures where the Middle East meets the Far East in an Islamic facing culture. Whilst in Kuala Lumpur you’ll find art markets, shopping centres, visit attractions and sample the local cuisine. Another great thing to do whilst in town is the Kuala Lumpur Bird Park, which is the world’s largest free-flight walk-in aviary. Here you can see Horn Bills (you know like Zazu out of The Lion King), Peacocks, Storks and many more avian varieties whilst strolling around the beautiful park. Whilst on the nature flex, why not check out the Batu Caves that reside 13 km north of Kuala Lumpur. Here you’ll find one of the most popular Hindu shrines outside India, dedicated to Lord Murugan. It is the focal point of the Hindu festival of Thaipusam in Malaysia, which will be taking place on 27th January 2013. The Batu Caves are formed from Limestone and are thought to be around 400 million years old. Back to the fun having, Kuala Lumpur is certainly a
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good place to let rip on the nightlife. The city comes alive from around 10pm onward, so don’t head out too early, or you might think it’s a sleepy town with nothing to do. Karaoke bars are popular here amongst the Chinese settlers, but you can also find fun along Changkat Bukit Bintang, which is one of the city’s most lively boulevards. Changkat Bukit Bintang is not only fun to say, but you’ll also find it chock-full of restaurants that transform into cocktail bars, nightclubs and pubs when night falls. If you fancy some English Ale or Mojitos whilst you’re in Kuala Lumpur then head to the Bukit Ceylon area. Here you’ll find plenty of pubs and bars that cater to your tastes. As we mentioned before Kuala Lumpur is a melting pot of cultures, so you can also ponder the wonderment of Little India. Little India is very busy, but if you’re into a bit of a culture shock make sure you visit it for the traditional food and bartering for the fabulous Indian clothes and nick-nacks on sale. If you fancy some quality street food then head to Chinatown. The pavements of Jalan Sultan and Jalan Tun HS Lee are strewn with plastic chairs and tables. The air here is filled with aromas of the Orient, you can pick up a really filling meal with a beer for around RM20. A word of warning when visiting both Little India and Chinatown is go for the stalls with lots of people, as this usually means your stomach will remain in tact. And what would a venture to South East Asia be without a bit of bootleg shopping? If you are partial to a bit of this type of shopping (although we are
not endorsing it!) then Chinatown’s shopping parade is awash with cheap clothes, brand-name copies in the form of handbags and watches, and don’t forget… “CDs, DVDs $1.” Ok well that’s just a common impression, but remember bartering is the name of the game here, so get prepared to haggle. For a bit of city sightseeing, then head to the commercial centre of the Petronas Towers, where you’ll find world class shopping, however if you’re not scared of heights and wanted to gain a different perspective of Kuala Lumpur then visit Menara KL. Standing at 421 metres, the Menara KL building in inspired by a Malaysian spinning top and the viewing deck is a whopping 276 metres up and a mammoth 100 metres above the Petronas Towers’ skybridge. You can head here for some amazing holiday snaps as well as catching some afternoon tea or an evening meal at the revolving restaurant. Like most city breaks, it’s not always the cheapest, and five days away will come in at around $450 for 4* + accommodation. However if you’re really looking to keep things to a bare minimum on the expense level then you can bag a comfortable night’s stay in a hostel such as Reggae Mansions for around $10 a night. There are lots of tours on offer to make sure you get the most out of Kuala Lumpur, so make sure you do your research for prices online before you get there, so you know that you’re getting a good price.
By Fanny Frangipane
Travel Essentials...
Fanny Wang Headphones Available in a range of colours, Fanny Wang headphones are the go to head phone for all your music needs. Not only do they fold away and store in a really nice protective case, the sound quality from them is so amazing, that you can’t hear anything but the beats coming from your mp3 player of choice. We tried and tested the Fanny Wang headphones on a flight, and if you don’t want to chat to your neighbour, hear any screaming babies, or just want to immerse your self in an audiobook then we couldn’t recommend a better choice! Fanny Wang headphones also come with a Duo Jack feature, so you can share your music with your friends, without being a pain to everyone else around you. The only thing we will say is that they don’t come cheap, but they are totally worth it - especially if you are travelling around, and want to soundtrack your journeys. The 1000 On Ear Series (pictured) come in at $249, and if you want some serious ear bling and you’re heavily into your bass, then expect to pay $349 for the 2000 DJ Series. If you’re budget is lower then opt for the ‘Wangbuds’ which will still ensure high definition sound, and the ear tips don’t annoyingly fall out of your ears.
Northface Jester
If you’re looking for a durable back pack then the Northface Jester is great for day trips. With handy side pockets where you can stick a drink or a map, or if you want to shove a towel or two inside and head down to the beach. This is the bag for you. Priced at $68, this bag will pretty much see you through most situations.
All in all, Fanny Wangs are the new must have item for music lovers on the move! Available from www.fannywang.com.au
Z Zone Ear Plugs Swiss Army Knife
The classic Swiss Army Knife is an essentual travel accessory. Equiped with scissors, bottle opener and various other sharp implements, these are the perfect tool to take on road trips, but just make sure you don’t travel on planes with it in your hand luggage. Prices vary depending on how nifty you want your knife. Available from www.kingofknives.com
X-Mini Speakers
The X-Mini speakers are a must have for any music lover who wants to share their music. Perfect for chilling on a balcone or on the beach with friends, the X-Mini speakers plug straight into your phone. With 12 hours playback, and USB charged, you can even piggy back these speakers to achieve massive sound when you want it. Priced at $28 and available from Amazon. com you can’t go wrong.
Priced at just $13.99 the Z Zone ear plugs are excellent for when you need to block out the sounds of others in order to get some shut eye. Each pack comes with adjustable sizes and you can get your mits on them from gotravelproducts.com
Havianas
If you’re heading off for a while there are two things you’ll need, the old faithful and durable flip flop that is the classic Haviana which is priced at around $20 and available from everywhere!
Nike AirMax
By far the most comfortable trainer on the market, Nike AirMax will set you back anywhere between $100-$130, but it’s advisable to purchase these abroad to avoid the huge mark up. These are not only great trainers for exercising in, but they’re ideal if you’re planning on going on any treks or even as a good raving trainer! Scout the Internet for the best price!
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WHAT’S TRENDING
Summer, summer, summer time... The season of sun, sea and shorts is finally here and to get you in the mood, we’ve put together a selection of suitably hot wardrobe staples available for international delivery.
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For guys, it’s all about printed shorts, vintage trainers and the return of the cap. For girls, think a sugary fresh palette of pastels and faded neons that carries all the way through to satchels and beauty, with Louise Gray for Topshop’s saccharine sweet lipstick cases. Whether you’re headed for the beach or the bar, BBM’s scorching picks are bound to get your summer off to a sizzling start…
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1. Levi’s Drill short - $177 from www.present-london.com 2. William Fox And Sons Flower Short - $177 from www.present-london.com 3. William Fox And Sons Triangle Short - $177 from www.present-london.com 4. Alcatraz Standard Vee Tee - $50 from www.levis.com.au 5. Stock Workshirt - $80 from www.levis.com.au 6. Clubmaster Sunglasses - $19 from www.asos.com 7. Adidas Originals Gazelle Indoor Trainers - $103 from www.asos.com 8. Casio MQ-24CC-4B2EF Orange Analogue Watch - $31 from www.asos.com 9. Snap Back Cap with Squares Print - $19 from www.asos.com 10. Classic Puma trainer in Gum Gold - $77 from www.asos.com 11.Label.M daily moisturising shampoo will keep you smelling fresh - $22 from selected hair dressers and www.lable.m.com
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1. Gem Bead Cami Top - $56 from www.topshop.com 2. Neon Floral Jacquard Tee - $70 from www.topshop.com 3. Lips in Mexican Wave by Louise Gray - $16 from www.topshop.com 4. Carla Jumpsuit by Motel - $74 from www.topshop.com 5. Waiting For The Sun 19.6G Naturel Sunglasses - $169 from www.urbanoutfitters.co.uk 6. Cambridge Satchel Company Exclusive to Asos 13� Leather Satchel $169 from www.asos.com 7. ASOS Federico Leather Sandals - $74 from www.asos.com 8. ASOS Dolly Skater Dress With Floral Print And Embroidery - $58 from www.asos.com 9. ASOS Playsuit in Stripe - $44 from www.asos.com 10. House of Holland Tee Dress in PomPom Floral - $183 from www.asos.com 11. Panther print Eastpak bag - $55 from Eastpak.com, Urban Outfitter and Office.com 12. Phone Case Peach & Blue - $10 from shop.sportsgirl.com.au 13. Paddle Fan Necklace - $20 from shop.sportsgirl.com.au 14. Lazy Oaf Spaghetti Hands Double Finger Ring - $33 from www.asos.com.au
By Jodie Kharas
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INTERVIEWS
Django Django Summer air was filled with the sounds of Django Django in 2012. The quartet of David Maclean (drummer and producer), Vincent Neff, (singer and guitarist), Jimmy Dixon, (bassist) and Tommy Grace (synth operator) create Funk and Folk with a Rocky sound which has taken the UK, Europe and Australia by storm. BBM’s caught up with Jimmy about the formation of the band, being nominated for the Mercury Music Prize and nursing that New Years Day hangover. Morning Jimmy how are you? Yeah I’m good; we’re just in Paris as we have a gig tonight, the last show of the European tour, then were heading back to London on Wednesday. But it’s been amazing, this is the first kind of proper European tour we’ve been on, so we’ve been in Germany for the first time and then we went to Milan and then up to Belgium and Holland, so it’s been great. . Where did the name ‘Django Django’ derive from? I think it was Dave that came up with it, to try to put a name to the first few songs that went up on MySpace. I think he had a dance record from the 90s in mind and the spaghetti western movies too and we just liked the word Django. Django Django kind of just sounded nice and was ambiguous, it also sounded quite rhythmic which was what we were aiming for really and it suited what we were about pretty well. It just sounded fun. How do you feel about your music being labelled ‘Folktronica’? I think generally we hear these genres that people make up and then other people latch on to, like ‘Folktronica’, it just sounds horrible! It’s just like bolting two words together to try and describe something. I think that it’s hard anyways to try and describe music, I’ve never really sat down and thought about what kind of sound we create or that we’ll sit down and make an album that sounds like this or like that. It’s kind of weird to be asked what to describe your own music as, but it’s just something that you can’t really get away from. You formed in 2009, what musical background did you have before this and how did you all meet and decide to create the band? I was at University over in Glasgow and was playing in a few bands but not making anything of it, nothing serious. It wasn’t until we moved down to London that Dave approached Vinnie basically asking to produce some of his songs and so I don’t think that
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there was any intention of us becoming a band or anything like that. Then we started to write a couple of songs and out them up online and then it kind of snowballed really, and we got offered gigs.
previous sideshows. So yeah, but it was totally brilliant, totally wowed by the crowds we got in Australia and we’re really looking forward to going back!
You album was nominated for the Mercury Music Prize, what other achievements have been stand out moments? Just getting the album finished was a huge kind of achievement for us. We spent quite a lot of our time recording the songs ourselves so it took up a lot of our time. We had one of our computers crash which had stored on it quite a bit of music as well so that was a big major set back. So, we had to re-record those, which took a fair bit of time. Even when we finished the album we had to sit on it for at least a good six or seven months, because the label wanted to promote the album and what not. Also, going to places like Japan, Australia and America have just been unbelievable!
What’s the best festival you’ve done this year? Any that we should think about venturing to? We had one in Sicily called ‘Ypsigrock’. It’s just like in this little town in Sicily where maybe 2000-3000 tickets are sold; we played with Alt-J and Primal Scream so it was just a nice little festival in a sort of medieval town at the top of this hill. It was totally amazing, you’re kind of used to going to these festivals where there’s hundreds of bands playing so it was just really nice to just have three bands and it was just a different flare, it was just really nice.
Your heading over to Australia to perform at Field Day, Falls and Summer Sundae Festival, are you looking forward to going back over to Australia? Yeah I think we go out on the 27th [December] back to Australia we’ve got a couple of festivals over New Year, and then some side shows over in January, so we totally can’t wait to get back out there. What would you usually be doing on New Years Day? Usually I think Dave and Tommy hire a cottage up in Scotland but I have a feeling they’re not going to be able to do it this year. I don’t know what I usually do, I normally end up just getting pretty drunk and not remembering anything (laughs) and then nursing a hangover the next day. But it will be amazing to be over in Australia, I’ve got a few friends over in Sydney as well so that should be quite fun too as I should be hanging out with them on New Years Day. Have you done many shows in Australia before? We went over for Splendour in the Grass and our
What’s next? We get back from Australia and then I think were going to start recording some new ideas, and then in February we go on the NME tour, for like two or three weeks. Then in March were going back to the U.S. for a few weeks again, then after that we’re going to just put everything aside and start recording. We’ll be back in London after Australia so we’ll be back to start the recordings in our hometown then! By Frankie Salt
Django Django Tour Dates Friday 28th DecemberThe Falls Festival - Lorne VIC Saturday 29th December- 1st JanuaryThe Falls, TAS Friday 4th- Saturday 5th JanuarySouthbound Festival, WA Thursday 10th January- The Zoo, QLD Friday 11th Janurary- The Metro, NSW Saturday 12th January- The Hi-Fi, Melbourne
INTERVIEWS Owner of record labels Dirtybird and Mothership, the legendary Claude VonStroke is no average House and Techno producer. Claude VonStroke A.K.A Barclay Crenshaw, was brought up in downtown Detroit and now based in San Francisco. Although creating House and Techno music, Crenshaw surprisingly admits that he was originally into Rap music before finding his Electronic roots. He has appeared on the Pete Tong Essential Mix Radio Show, has produced a Fabric mix which was critically acclaimed and is now working on his third studio album. BBM magazine delves deeper to find out more about this talented producer… Hello Barclay, how are you today? I’m very well thank you, and you Frankie? I’m really good thanks mate. So, how has this year been, what has been a highlight for you? This year has been amazing, especially for the label. The highlights have been probably the releases. We had some break out people like Eats Everything and Shadow Child. The Justin Martin album did really well too! So on the release side of things, it did very well. You own the Dirtybird and Mothership labels, how did you come to sign amazing artists such as Justin Martin? (We love him down at BBM towers!) Justin Martin was my friend before we did this from all the way back in 2001. The rest of everyone else are just demos which I listen to and then we see how they are and what they’re doing and then it is just a natural progression. Did growing up in Detroit influence you musically as you were growing up? Not as much as everyone would think in the Techno realm. There were a couple of radio shows which were very influential on me where as a kid in America, you would never just hear a lot of Techno or Hip Hop growing up. So this helped me to hear the music which definitely influenced me. So what made you first get into Rap music and then into Techno? I literally only listened to Hip hop for 15 years. It was a natural possession of hearing Hip Hop and then Drum and Bass and then getting into House. Everything happened without an explanation, it just did. I then got really into Drum and Bass but the girls stopped going to those raves and so I got into House (both laughing). So when I look back at your remix of Samim ‘Heater’ from a few years now, this was a huge summer tune in the UK and beyond, why did
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Claude VonStroke
you choose to remix this track? I didn’t decide really. I got asked to do it as I was friends with Samim. No one was wise to the fact that it was going to be a big track; it was just like any other remix I would do for my friend. That tune ended up being a huge track which people either absolutely loved or hated. I just did it for a mate and that was how it went. I didn’t even charge.
Do you very often remix a track as it is a personal favourite tune of yours? How would this come about organically? I usually don’t touch remixes unless I am friends with that person. Perhaps the track may inspire me but this is a rare reason, I used to do a lot of remixes in the beginning but I just found that remixes are interesting as they can only go somewhere for the original artist. So I would rather waste my ideas and effort on my own stuff. I remember hearing your track tune ‘Who’s afraid of Detroit’ for the very first time and wondering; why would you call it this? Well at that point, I had been living downtown in Detroit and Detroit is a very interesting city as there are seven or eight million people living in the outskirts and maybe only 700,000 in the downtown. People are scared for some reason and when I was living there, I had no issues at all and I was having great fun. I didn’t experience any crime or problems and so I wanted to know why people were scared, hence the name of the track. Who did the vocals for the ‘Vocal Chords’ track and what was the inspiration behind the track? He will probably be mad as I can’t remember his name now. But I hired a guy who was a barber shop quartet singer and we literally went through every octave or fifth or whatever in every vowel format [Barclay sings]. He sang five seconds a piece and then by accident I hit the mute buttons and the loop. We started bouncing through it and that is how the song came about. (That is incredible as it doesn’t sound like a human at all). I wanted to make a song
that was the complete opposite to Deep Throat Wsinging vocals from Deep Throat. Do you have an all-time stand out festival moment? I realize this must be a difficult question as you have played a serious amount all over the world. Yeah there is a festival that I had a great time at. It is called WTF (What The Festival) which is in Oregon. The people were just amazing, they took care of me and the crowd was a little bit weirder and camping up in the mountains. It had a great family vibe. You have recently collaborated on ‘Ignorance Is Bliss’ with Eats Everything - how did you two come to collaborate on this? Well he is already on Dirty Bird for a couple of things and we were doing his compilation, so I think he sent in a demo for this and I had an idea how to make it into a different track by using his different sounds. Again, it just happened. What more can we expect from Claude Van Stroke in 2013? What are you most looking forward to in Australia in January? I am trying to finish my next album by Fall 2013. I have a new track on the compilation at the beginning of the year which kicks off our label tour. That is enough work for me! This is my seventh year coming to Australia, I love the people there, I just wish I could spend more time at the beach!
Claude VonStroke Tour Dates Friday 25th January, 2013 Brown Alley, Melbourne Saturday 26th January, 2013 Chinese Laundry at The Ivy, Sydney Sunday 27th January, 2013 (Day) Skyroom, Brisbane
Andrew Clarke, better known as Andy C, is the king of Drum and Bass. DJ, producer and co-founder of the famous RAM records, things for Andy aren’t slowing down any time soon. RAM is now in its 20th year and as he heads over to Australia for his tour, he gets prepared with a bag full of RAM parties in the UK and a touch of early Christmas shopping to get him in the mood.
Andy C
Hi Andy, How are you? Where are you now, at home? Yeah I’m good thank you. I’m just at home, it’s Friday so I’m just getting ready. We have two RAM Records parties tonight, one of them in Nottingham and one in Birmingham. Then I have Leeds and Cambridge tomorrow and over the weekend, and I’ve just woken up and there’s frost all on the ground, winter is finally here!
How has the year been for you, obviously you’ve been a very busy man? The past year so much has happened; I had a live show that went really well. I’ve been back in the studio doing a couple of remixes and also I’ve been doing some solo stuff. The labels gone from strength to strength, it’s been pretty full on! We’re up and down the country every weekend or every other weekend DJ-ing so yeah man, it’s been really good! How has this year been for new releases? Well I’ve been doing remixes, I did about five remixes and now just over the past month I’m just having a little go in the studio doing a few bits and bobs, see what comes out. Some stuff I can test out on the road and can run alongside the label. I love every part of it, I’m really loving the vibe in the parties and the crowds at the moment, they seem to be getting bigger and they seem to be really going crazy for it. You recently headlined at the Warehouse Project, How was it? It was sick! It was unbelievable! I was up there last week and I also went up there in October and both times it was just under 6,000 people. It’s absolutely crazy; just beautiful! The vibe is strong at the minute, I’m going to just work through December and then I just can’t wait to get over to the other side of the world to kick start my year!
Drum & Bass has always been a vinyl lovers genre, do you still use vinyl or are you up to scratch with the present digital era? Well I use Traktor now, and have been since around August time. I absolutely love it, I was meant to do a six-hour set at Fabric but I ended up doing a sevenhour set because I just had all my tunes ready to go. I can go anywhere I want to go musically and that’s really fantastic. But as you say it’s a vinyl lover’s genre, yeah definitely without a doubt! It’s definitely the strongest genre for vinyl and has remained so. But the 6,000 people that were in Manchester last week, they’re not all vinyl lovers they just love the music. When did you really start to think that things were taking off? Obviously you created RAM back in ‘82, so you’re in your 20th year now, when did you realise that it was actually going somewhere pretty fast? Well after the first release that sold out and did really well, it was probably the fourth release that was ‘the one’. Before then you’re just trying to find your feet, you’re trying to figure out what style of music you want to make and I was young, I was 16 at the time, and when ‘Standing in the Shadows’ came out it just went absolutely crazy! I had residency at ‘Telepathy’, a club in London when I was just 16! I wasn’t even old enough to get into the club! Have you got a festival highlight that you’ve had, that sticks in your mind? There are tonnes! I mean just from this year, I played to about 9,000 people at Global Gathering; it’s an insane amount of people. Then coming out to Australia and doing Stereosonic Festival, it was just unbelievable. How do you think the old Drum & Bass compares to the stuff that we hear today? Do you think that it’s changed because of the technology or the crowd? It’s evolved to a point where there is now so many styles and sides to Drum & Bass. Back in the day
it just used to go through phases, where a certain sound would come in and everybody would do that and then another one would come in and everyone would then do the same with that. Whereas now to me, there are all of these sounds just running alongside one another, everyone on the label has their own different and unique sound. There is literally something for everybody! I can guarantee you that if you dug deep enough you would be able to find some of the similar stuff that you fell in love with a few years ago, now, that’s the beauty of Drum & Bass. What do you like to do in your spare time to chill out? I like to chill out with my family and kick back; you know I do what everybody else does. I’m doing some Christmas shopping at the moment, and I like to get in there early! What have you got coming up, tour wise and gig wise overseas and in Australia? Well I’m over in Australia in the New Year doing some Festivals and gigs, I just find there whole attitude is beautiful, it’s an amazing place, everyone’s up for a good time and the sun’s shining, I’m really looking forward to it and that fires me up you know, all of the parties are wicked! I always feel revitalised when I come back home to London. I always need a recalibration and out in Australia I think they have such a positive outlook and energy it’s great!
Andy C Tour Dates Thursday, 24th January, HQ Complex, Adelaide Friday, 25th January Metro City, Perth Saturday, 26th January Hifi, Mebourne Sunday, 27th January Metro Theatre, Sydney
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INTERVIEWS Hey Charlie, where are you right now? I’m just on the freeway, sat in traffic. So your new ‘Against the Current’ EP drops today, how you feeling about it? Well I am very happy to get this out and I hope people enjoy the end result. My aim is to get five of the EPs in the series and then create a book of my visual art at the end of the whole project. I hope this is the beginning to a fabulous end result. Sounds like a great project, we love ‘Against the Current’, it starts off so typically Hip Hop, but throwing Ming-Xia in the mix is a nice surprise. How did you end up teaming up? Well actually, Ming who sings on the EP is a good friend of mine and has been for a very long time. She has spent such a long time with her group The Spooks and then her solo work. She can really write and it’s cool to collaborate with someone of such great talent. I feel like it is perfect to reach out to and work with someone from whom I can learn a lot with and someone I respect as much as I do Ming. You’ve got such a distinctive voice, how do you feel this has helped your music? I do think that this definitely helped to solidify my individuality. I think if you follow this up with skill and content by making it something that the listeners can relate to. I am hoping that it is a combination and mixture of all of those things, which helps to make the music worth listening to. You’ve been an exceptional player in the Hip Hop world; tell us about how you got started? How did you make your mark? Well, I think my first mark was the ‘Unified Rebelution’. It was about being in the right place at the right time. This was the first thing we put out and the small piece of snow which became the snowball. What were the Jurassic 5 Days like? The original days of Jurassic huh? Well, I was a stay at home Mom at one point, we all had day jobs and I was also a security guard at one point. Trying to get gigs, it was again about being in the right place at the right time and doing the right thing and being seen by the right people. What do you think about the state of Hip Hop at the moment? Our movement was Hip Hop. It wasn’t just the music. Now they just look at the Rap aspect of the movement. It is no longer the traditional thing that we used to participate in. If you were into Hip Hop, you used to dress, talk and listen in a certain style of way. It was a lifestyle. Now things are certainly different. It had to change with the time; it has adapted and technology has affected it. We didn’t have computers and iPhones and iPads. Everything is an instagramification, we used to have to work a lot harder for what we had but now technology helps that. People have studios at home and on the road. All of this is affecting what this music is and what the style, genre and trend is of the movement.
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What was the first track you ever bought which really made a difference to your life? Wow, you know, I remember Rappers Delight was my first record. Grandmaster Flash I think solidified what the musical aspect of Hip Hop was.
Chali 2na
Why did you want to dedicate your life to it? Rappers Delight opened up the door for it all and made me go “Damn what is this?” and so it all came together and it speaks to a time in my life. I subconsciously dedicated my life to it without knowing I guess. You’ve even teamed up with Rizzlekicks, what was it like working with people relatively new to the scene? It feels good you know. I respect those guys a lot, you can tell that they believe in what they do with the Hip Hop world. They hold onto traditions. They hold ethics to the scene. Who was the most influential person you have had the pleasure to work alongside and what was it like working with Roc C? I think the most influential person would be someone that I collaborated with would be someone outside of the genre of Hip Hop. Like George Clinton, I wasn’t aware of how talented he was on the mic. I am very fond of people like this. Roc C is one of my favourite dudes, and always will be. I love all of the raw stuff. We’ve heard that you like to paint also, tell us about your art? The art thing comes before the Rap bit actually; it is how I got into Hip Hop. This is how I originally got into the ethics of the genre and the traditions. The love of drawing and how I can apply that to what I like. This was an outlet to explore the genre further. I didn’t know that it would be the music that would open up the biggest doors but I sometimes take the art more seriously than the music. I love photography too. What’s been the craziest moment of your career? My time with George Clinton, he is a genius in the studio! People need to learn what a genius he is and watching him in the studio was one of the craziest things I have ever seen. He would mumble words until they made sense and then they would slap you in the face. You’re heading out to Australia in January, where are you most looking forward to visiting? I love the art out there. On my downtime when I’m not doing the shows, I want to be painting.
Chali 2na Tour Dates Wednesday 9th January Republic Bar, Hobart Friday 11th January The Factory Theatre, Sydney Sun 13th January, Sets On The Beach Festival, Perth
The baritone boom that shaped some of Hip Hop’s finest moments comes from none other than Chali 2na. Born and raised in Chicago, Charles Stewart is renowned for his associations with the late great Jurassic 5 and Ozomatli. Shaping the face of Hip Hop, Chali 2na talks us through the Hip Hop way of life and working with artists such as Roc C and Ming Xia. With his highly anticipated new EP ‘Against the Current’ bursting with Hip Hop pride, BBM catches up with the bassy wordsmith and artist to find out what a little bit more about his wonderful world. Chali 2na will be touching down in Australia in January so expect to see him in Hobart, Sydney and Perth. Interviews By Frankie Salt & Hannah Shakir
Single Reviews Trophy Wife – Microlite
There’s been a large amount of copycat bands since Foals came bursting onto the music scene a few years ago. But it’s only very rarely that a band, especially one so young, is able to take an existing genre of music and truly craft it in to their own sound. ‘Microlite’ is a stunning single that glistens with attraction and provides you with genuine pleasure as you listen. The twists and turns flow brilliantly against a sleek collection of riffs and lyrics that wouldn’t sound out of place on a festival stage this summer. You’ll be so impressed that it wont be long before you’re after a Trophy Wife all of your own.
Best Coast The Only Place
Grizzly Bear – Yet Again
This new single, ‘Yet Again’ taken from ‘Shields’ is a wonderful arrangement of sounds that verges on the edge of epic. The dirty guitar solos and thumping drums towards the end of the track almost feel a million miles away from its gentle introduction. It’s a superb way to spend five minutes of your day.
Divine Fits Flaggin’ A Ride
Bethany Cosentino and Bobb Bruno have been teasing us with their charming surf pop since 2009 and have won over both critics and fans from every corner of the globe. This first single, ‘The Only Place’ taken from their second album of the same name is a flowery, sun-drenched pop song that is crammed full of fun. The lyrics see Beth gloating about living in California, “Why would we live anywhere else?/We’ve got the ocean/ Got the babes/We’ve got the sun/We’ve got the waves” and will surely fill you with purest form of jealousy. Especially when it’s bitterly cold in London and you can’t feel your feet.
This new single, ‘Flaggin’ A Ride’ is a toe tapping introduction to the bands sound that’s slightly reminiscent of Gotye’s mega hit, ‘Somebody That I Used To Know’. The fun beat and catchy chorus will no doubt be stuck in your head for a few hours, but it’s the tracks production that truly stands out. Each listen reveals the minor details of handclaps, guitar licks and subtle synths layered perfectly amongst the pulsing rhythm. It’s a joy to have in your ears.
Villagers Nothing Arrived
Unknown Mortal Orchestra - Swim And Sleep (Like A Shark)
However, following-up such a string of success with something equally as impressive is never easy. Yet somehow, Villagers appear to have done it almost effortlessly. ‘Nothing Arrived’ sounds incredible. It’s refreshing tones tickle the soul and present a beautiful arrangement that’s both tender and touching, almost intimate, yet it’s performed on an epic scale. It’s the second single taken from the new album, ‘{Awayland}’ due out in early 2013, and we can’t wait to hear more.
EP Reviews
Here is a band that has time and time again shown us that they can write fantastic music. The debut was stunning, they provided the brilliant soundtrack to the Ryan Gosling blockbuster, ‘Blue Valentine’, and their latest full-length, ‘Shields’ is perhaps the album of the year.
Divine Fits is a super group made-up of the combined talents of Britt Daniel (Spoon), Dan Boeckner (Wolf Parade), & Sam Brown (New Bomb Turks), which basically means that they are a force to be reckoned with when it comes to Indie music.
Being nominated for a Mercury Prize means you must be doing something right. Add that to a long list of sold out performances, countless festival appearances and an award winning debut album, and you are pretty much sorted.
MUSIC NEWS
Imagine a vast ocean, lonely and unforgiving. You’re resting on the surface of the water, drifting aimlessly through the waves that stir around you. You’ve been swimming all day and fatigue is setting in. You’re now given one song to listen to in order to help you sleep, but which one do you chose? We would recommend this. It’s a stunning, reverb-laden Indie track that delicately flutters around your mind and evokes feelings of swimming and sleeping (like a shark if you wish). They’re not quite an orchestra, as they’re only a three-piece, but they are still just as impressive at writing wonderful songs.
The 1975 – Sex EP
A few months ago they were one of the UK’s most allusive bands. Now, after Radio One approval and support slots for the likes of Little Comets and One Night Only, The 1975 are surely destined for success. This second EP, ‘Sex’ is packed full of surprises and features some of the bands finest song writing to date. There may only be four tracks, but you get a full mix of indie allure, electro beats and stadium-esc anthems. It’s highly likely that The 1975 will soon become a household name, watch this space!
RATKING – Wiki98
XL records latest signing, RATKING is a four-piece rap group from Harlem. Fronted by the quick-lipped nimble 18-year-old Patrick “Wiki” Morales, they came together as punks, but have since developed a unique and exciting sound that reeks of raw energy and intelligence. This first major release, ‘Wiki98’ is an explosive collection of tracks that is packed full of angry spits and digs, blended with intense beats and impressive rhymes. Standout single, ‘Wikispeaks’ is easily one of the finest Hip Hop songs to be released this year, whilst ‘646-704-2610’ shows their astonishing and innovative approach to songwriting. RATKING is a perfect reaction to the times and wouldn’t ever happen anywhere else but in New York City. The group is a perfect snapshot of youth culture on the cities busy, hostile streets, and they are here to stay. That’s a guaranteed.
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MUSIC NEWS
Album Reviews Their debut album, ‘And That’ is very much a different venture from the norm for the duo that will certainly cater for fans of either artist’s. Skinner’s exceptional production on the record is a brilliant example of the guy’s talent and gives, And That a lot of listenable aspects, even if it’s just to admire the quality of the recording.
Peaking Lights – Lucifer In Dub
Having released the stunning album, ‘Lucifer’ earlier in the year, LA duo Aaron Coyes and Indra Dunis aka Peaking Lights are back with this reworked Dub version of the critically acclaim record. Produced entirely by Aaron himself, ‘Lucifer In Dub’ is a special collection of tracks featuring a wide range of sounds from Krautrock, minimal House, analogue Dance and of course, Dub. The fresh approach to the album is a cracking listen that gives fans of the band the opportunity to immerse themselves totally amongst the inner workings of the bands diverse influences. Not only that, but it will also appeal greatly to anyone who is interested in remix culture and on the look out for something interesting. The third track, ‘Beautiful Dub’ is in everyway a beautiful Dub. It’s a spacious blend of echoes and digital blips that wonderfully roll along to a guiding beat. The vocals fuzzy feel reverberate around the speakers and bring the song to life in a loving manner. They’re not to over powering, yet subtle enough to sound like an instrument. ‘Lo Dub Hi Dub’ starts with a doorbell, inviting you into a darker realm of surrealism that when mixed with the sound of a crying baby, and what almost sounds like panning laughter, quickly becomes a haunting version of the original track entitled, ‘Lo Hi’. Lucifer In Dub is an engaging record that sounds innovative and exhilarating, whilst giving you a chance to witness an exciting new side, to an already brilliant band.
Harvey’s vocals are not too dissimilar to that of The Music, but it is refreshing to hear the singer out of the context of his rock group. When layered up with the addition of Skinner’s distinct backing vocals, it’s a surprising mix that happens to work very well. Throw in an unexpected guest appearance from US rapper Danny Brown and singer-songwriter Clare Maguire on the brilliant, ‘You Never’ and the record becomes more of an exciting fusion of concepts. It’s a sort of Indie-House-Dub genre you‘ll soon want to shake your hips to. Think stadium rock vocals in a confined, underground House club. Probably way ahead of it’s time, one can’t help but wonder what it might sound like live..?
Dimitri From Paris – Back In The House
“Do trust that I made this for you as I would have for myself”, explains Dimitri From Paris in the sleeve of his latest album, Back In The House. “May it stay by your side for a long time.” Dimitri has been doing this kind of thing for years. In fact, France in general has been producing great Disco influenced House music since the 90s, and this latest album from the fantastic producer is no exception. It’s a massive collection of 38 tracks taken from two separate mixes. The first is a live set from The Horse & Groom in London largely compiled of super smooth remixes and tracks that both Dimitri and his friends (Tiger & Woods, Kenny Dope, Maceo Plex etc.) have produced.
The D.O.T. – And That
We all know who Mike Skinner is right? The talented chap responsible for the incredible songwriting, as well as the production, behind the revolutionary UK band The Streets. But do we all know who Rob Harvey is? A few of you may remember him. He’s the shaggy haired lead singer from indie outfit The Music. Well, as it turns out the two of them met backstage at Big Bay Out back in 2005. Fastforward seven years later and they have formed The D.O.T.
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The second is a studio session mixed together again with more Disco House remixes, and featuring the likes of Moullinex, Morgan Geist and MAM. Over the expanse of the record you’ll start to find a few areas where the modern production seems to outweigh the original, but it isn’t long before another mix comes along to perk up your thoughts whilst keeping most of the integrity that is abundantly present. For a few fans and new comers out there, this album is likely to stay by them for a very long time. Mission accomplished!
LKFFCT - Lake Effect
There’s not much to say about LKFFCT. Not because their music isn’t good, but because there is very little information about the band around. This certainly isn’t a bad thing though because the duo from NJ seem happy to let their music do the talking. This debut album, ‘Lake Effect’ has been released for free via the band Soundcloud and is filled with tonnes of lo-fi glossiness that captures the charm of the two former underground punk kids perfectly. Mini middle track, ‘Suntan’ is a wonderful little example of how to write a faultless pop song, whilst its bigger, bolder brother, ‘Sheltered’ brings to light a satisfying song that’s both honest and revealing. The brilliant lyrics present a darker meaning that sees the band wearing their hearts on their sleeves, “My hands across my chest/I couldn’t contain this bloody mess/I think I know something’s wrong/ Something’s wrong”. As far as two-piece bands go, they are either really good or really bad. For LKFFCT it’s certainly not the latter. The enticing sounds presented on ‘Lake Effect’ have created a sensational debut that will certainly make welcoming the new year a whole lot easier.
Blue Hawaii – Untogether
From the very beginning there is a clear expression of minimalism surrounding the record. The sparse synth pads that scatter the tracks mix impressively with the breaking beats, whilst the soft, delicate vocals appear to be used more as an instrument than a lead hook. As you progress through the album you get a sense of the environment in which it was conceived. There’s a chilling, disjointed feel throughout that doesn’t sound too dissimilar to The XX, just with more interesting drum patterns and ever-so-slightly harsher rhythms. The beautiful vibrating tones of, ‘Yours To Keep’ provides an evocative listen filled with dark echoing lyrics that resonate with the sounds of a broken heart. “Please don’t, please don’t give up” are the closing lines to one of the finer songs on the album. At a point in time when groups such as AlunaGeorge and 14th are starting to make a climb in music, with an interested variety of underground club sounding pop songs, there isn’t a better opportunity for Blue Hawaii to start making waves. Untogether will certainly not do as it’s title suggests, but will instead bring musician and listener together on this brilliant record. By Robert Bramhill
FUNNY NEWS Takes some balls to accuse the son of God of copying your fashion sense. Maybe he’s not a big jessie after all.
Assume The Position
When BBM was blasted for using the phrase ‘must have big tits’ in an advert for a job as our receptionist, we listened to the many complaints that flooded in, realised we were in the wrong and rectified our error. Now the ad just says ‘big tits preferable’. This proves that anyone who accuses BBM of being sexist is just a dumb, blonde bitch who probably needs a good seeing too (insert Sid James laughter here).
Darts Fan Gets Crucified
What would Jesus do? That’s the message we’re frequently told by God-fearing Bible humpers whenever they bother us in crowded shopping centres. Apparently we’re supposed to apply that simple axiom to everyday situations, like when someone wants to cut in front of you in traffic. Or when your best mate’s younger sister is drunk, takes off her knickers and says she wants to sit on your face. What would Jesus do indeed? Well finally we have the answer to one modern-day WWJD scenario. What would Jesus do if he was kicked out of a darts match?
Well finally there’s a job advert out there that’s even more unappealing than ours. The US publishing group Dalkey Archive Press apparently have a vacancy for an intern. Perks of the job include working weekends and evenings, abandoning your personal life, and doing whatever you’re told – all for no pay. Oh, and you can be sacked on the spot for taking personal phone calls, gossiping or using the internet during office hours – or even for offering some friendly advice. The conditions are so cack it was described as the ‘worst job description ever’ by the New York Observer. The ad goes on to state the only applicants who need apply are those who ‘do not have any other commitments (personal or professional) that will interfere with their work at the Press’. Anyone thinking of applying is not told how long the internships last but if they secure a paid job they should be ‘willing to start off at a low-level salary’.
Well apparently he’d blubber about it to the local press and claim he was bullied by fellow fans like a little girl.
Some light has been shed on the subject thanks to new research on animals in a similar climate and of approximately the same weight. According to Russian rescuers, they managed to save two circus elephants from dying in the Siberian winter by getting them drunk on vodka. Suddenly the Geordie enigma seems a lot clearer.
To warm up the animals, the trainers “mixed two cases of vodka with warm water and gave them to the elephants,” a police official said. “They started roaring like if they were in the jungle! Perhaps, they were happy.”
Organisers began to worry it would disturb the players, so Grindal was taken outside by security. As he left a chant of ‘Stand up if you love Jesus’ broke out with many of the boozed-up crowd getting to their feet.
“I love darts, but I’m worried about ever going to see it live again,” he said. “It was all very weird and distressing. I didn’t break down crying but I did get emotionally distraught. “They were bullying me and picking on me, saying that I was someone else.” He added: “I didn’t go to the darts dressed as Jesus – I went as me.”
We’ve all seen the Geordie slappers up Newcastle wearing nothing but a short skirt and boob tube on a freezing cold January night. How they do it without dying of pneumonia (or an STD) has always remained a mystery. Until now.
Apparently the elephants’ cage burned down after a petrol-powered heater in the van set fire to their straw. Amid temperatures of minus 35 degrees Celsius, the elephants “suffered a light frostbite to the tips of their ears” and, after the vodka, a sudden craving for a kebab and a shag down an alley.
Apparently, when arrows fan Nathan Grindal went to a match involving Phil ‘The Power’ Taylor and Kim Huybrechts in Minehead, his sandals and beard appearance sparked chants of ‘Jesus, Jesus’ from the large and (it’s safe to assume) drunk crowd.
He had to watch the rest of the televised match at Butlins on a screen. The labourer, 33, from Abingdon, near Oxford, said he felt ‘discriminated over something he had no control over’.
Plenty Of Alcohol In The Trunk
The company’s US director John O’Brien told the Irish Times: “I’ve been swamped with emails I wish they’d stop: I’ve work to do - and with job applications.”
And in more news about the rise of anti-social behaviour among elephants, villagers have attacked a police station in Nepal demanding officers shoot a rogue pachyderm that’s apparently killed four people. The elephant killed a couple and at least two other people last month in the villages bordering the Chitwan forest. Seeing as we’ve already proved that elephants share a lot of traits with Geordies, maybe someone should send Gazza in to calm the elephant down with a bag of sandwiches before he turns his tusks on himself.
But do any of the applicants have big tits John? That’s the big question. And while we’re on the subject, the reception position is still open, although we should warn you that we have a very ‘hands on’ policy when it comes to checking if an applicant’s ‘talents’ are real or fake.
For more funny news log on to www.bbmlive.com for all the latest in celeb gossip, funny world news and jokes. www.bbmlive.com 39
FUNNY NEWS Going Up Hugh Jackman
We’re expecting Hugh to be scopping up some Academy awards for Les Mis in 2013
Taylor Swift
We can’t stop listening to ‘Trouble’ and she’s shagging Harry Styles, Taylor you are now the envy of women everywhere.
Give A Dog A Bad Name
A vindictive, but imaginative, Chinese woman has been fined £500 for giving her dog the same name as a feuding neighbour just so she could repeatedly swear at the mutt. Hu Lin fell out with her neighbour, Wang Sun, after they butted heads over a building extension to his home six years ago. So she named her pet pooch Wang and, whenever her neighbour was within earshot, started berating the poor pooch. “To get her own back she named her dog Wang and then whenever she saw me she would start swearing and insulting the dog using my name,” Wang said during the proceedings at the courthouse in Gansu province. “Everyone knew what she was up to.” In her defence, we know plenty of dog walkers who’ve used the name Wang for their pet. Just go down Clapham Common any night of the week and you’ll here dozens of men calling for Wang.
Mistakes Need Ironing Out
We’ve all experienced hilarious mix-ups from time to time. Whether it’s accidentally brushing your teeth with pile ointment instead of toothpaste, or slipping up your girlfriend’s wrong hole, the anecdotes are endless. But while several of BBM’s girlfriends may disagree, one man has come up with the most painful mix-up so far after his phone rang while he had a hot iron in his hand. Half an hour later, he was in hospital being treated for serious burns to the face and ear. “Women are always going on about multi-tasking, so I set up the iron, opened a beer and put the boxing on the telly,” said Tomasz Paczkowski, 32, from Elbag, Poland. “It started out well, but then I got so involved in the boxing that I wasn’t really thinking about what I was doing. So when the phone rang I picked up the iron by mistake and pressed it to my ear.” While most newspapers saw the lighter side of the story, the Daily Mail used it as another example of Poles coming to England to take our classic slapstick comedy routines.
Indiana Jones And The Baffling Journal Prank
In a move so nerdy it’s almost cool, someone has sent a replica Indiana Jones journal to baffled officials at the University of Chicago and addressed it to ‘Henry Walton Jones Jr’, the character’s real name. Representatives from Lucasfilm denied they were involved in sending the journal, and Harrison Ford isn’t senile enough yet to think he actually is Indy. Consequently, no one has a bloody clue who sent it or why, although Grace Chapin, admissions counsellor at the school, suggested the strange piece of mail could be part of an ‘alternate reality’ game, in which participants left clues for other players. Frankly, after coming up with such an oddball solution to the riddle, we think someone should check Grace about her DVD collection, or at least see if she has a restraining order banning her from going within 100 metres of Skywalker Ranch.
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Britney Spears
We couldn’t be happier that Britney has pissed Tulisa off so much after stealing her ‘Scream & Shout’ single, whilst Tulisa’s music is flopping.
The Queen
We’re watching you Queeny, and if you don’t let us have a day off when Kate drops her sprog, we will not be a happy people.
Kim Kardashian
Kim’s been wearing way too many clothes since she’s been banging Kanye West. What’s the point in her if she hasn’t got her lilians out?
Rihanna
We’re a bit fed up of Rihanna posting dodgy titty pics on her Twitter and Instagram and she’s back with woman beater Chris Brown...now she’s just your average attention seeking bint.
Simon Cowell
X-Factor is over, so why the hell are we still being forced to even hear about that shit. Simon Cowell, you are truly evil for concocting such a show that dominates as much as the 2012 Olympics.
Going Down
SPORTS NEWS And those generous Latics fans clearly feel all clubs should have a flame-haired contingent among their number after a baffling outbreak of supporters trying to set alight rival fans’ hair. Apparently a number of Oldham match-goers have been kicked out of Boundary Park for combining their love of pyrotechnics with amateur hairdressing. The results have met with varying success, but so far the only real damage has been some isolated cases of severe singeing. An Oldham statement, released on their official website, urged those planning trouble to watch their hot-headed behaviour, with Greater Manchester Police now involved in identifying culprits.
Forget bunkers and water hazards, golf turned its danger level up from “tweed trousers” to “soiled jeans” at last month’s Australian PGA championship after organisers released an eight-metre tall T-Rex onto the course.
“Latics are warning fans that anti-social behaviour will not be tolerated at Boundary Park,” said the statement. “We have recently had supporters ejected for such offences as bottle throwing and attempting to light people’s hair with cigarette lighters. This is totally unacceptable behaviour and cannot be tolerated.
Golf being a game of tradition, you’d think the sport’s lawmakers would have yelled ‘yabba dabba doo!’ at the prospect of playing on a course identical to that which our caveman ancestors would have competed on way back in 200BC when dinosaurs roamed the land.
“Greater Manchester Police have ‘spotters’ attending all games that are not policed and are aware of these incidents.” The incidents are just the latest in several instances of anti-social behaviour to take place at Oldham this season,
Sadly not though, instead they thought the mechanical T-Rex was a blatant attempt to cash in on advertising and threatened to move next year’s event to a different location. The dinosaur was also criticised by Japanese players, many of whom are still scarred by the Godzilla attacks on Tokyo during the 60s and 70s.
Manchester police say fans have been committing a range of offences, including throwing coins and bottles at players, with the Lactics’ £10 season ticket offer being blamed for attracting a number of troublemakers and twats from the local area. By Manchester police’s logic, therefore, clubs with expensive season tickets shouldn’t have any crowd trouble or instances of items being thrown onto the pitch. And this is the same police force that covered the Manchester derby right?
A Sight For Saur Eyes
But the majority of golfers didn’t seem to mind. In fact, veteran linksman Peter Senior came out with one of the quotes of the year when asked what he thought about the kerfuffle, saying: “It doesn’t worry me as long as it doesn’t crap everywhere.” You stay classy Peter.
Police Put Heat On Oldham Fans
As well as being known as one of the greatest ginger footballers of his generation, Manchester United legend Paul Scholes is also famously an Oldham Athletic fan.
“Like every other cycling fan, I am thrilled the world’s biggest bike race is coming back to this country,” British Cycling president Brian Cookson said. “The huge numbers who turned out to support the 2007 Grand Depart and the London 2012 road races show the passion we have for cycling. I’m sure Yorkshire will give the 2014 Tour de France a welcome which will stand out in the race’s rich history.” Well Brian, considering the average Yorkshireman considers a curt nod of his flat cap to be a warm welcome, we won’t hold our breath.
After years of being associated with Russell Brand, West Ham United fans finally have a link to genuine comedy after the club briefly appeared in an episode of The Simpsons. A flag with the team’s name on it is seen strewn across the bedroom of a “cool” new neighbour. The only problem is the flag is yellow and green instead of claret and blue, so either the show’s animators haven’t got a bloody clue who West Ham are or it’s actually meant to be a tribute to Norwich City. Considering the characters in The Simpsons are yellow though, we’ll let this minor error slide.
The replica T-Rex usually flips his tail and emits a loud roar when he senses someone coming (a bit like Tiger Woods when he’s shagging a hooker). However, the competition’s professionals were spared any frights as the dinosaur – nicknamed ‘Jeff’ – was unplugged for the duration of the event.
Which, funnily, enough is what hookers think when they’re being shagged by Tiger Woods.
Apparently the county that’s famous throughout the world for bringing us Tetleys (the tea), Tetleys (the beer), and the Chuckle Brothers beat off stiff competition from Florence and Edinburgh to host the prestigious event. We’re not entirely sure why the world’s elite cyclists would want to go to Leeds, but if it’s anything like BBM remembers from our university days, the easy access to drugs could have been a factor.
Simpsons Get Hammered
The robotic giant lizard dominated the skyline around the ninth and tenth holes – part of owner Clive Palmer’s plans to eventually turn the Palmer Coolum resort into a theme park.
“It’s different, that’s for sure (to be sure),” said Northern Irish pro Darren Clarke. “But it’s fine, sponsors give us a lot and in this day and age you accept that it is what it is.”
hopping across the channel for the rest of the race. Full details of the route will be announced at a news conference in Leeds and Paris on 17 January.
Yorkshire’s The Wheel Deal
For reasons we’ve never really understood, the Tour de France – despite its name – isn’t always held in France. Instead they usually race a few stages through other beautiful parts of Europe, like the Swiss Alps, Holland’s famous lowlands and the cobbled streets of Belgium. Now Leeds is set to be added to the cavalcade of panoramic vistas that scatter the Tour. No, really. Apparently the 2014 Tour de France will start in Yorkshire before moving south to London and then
“West Ham United were delighted to be featured in The Simpsons episode ‘The Day The Earth Stood Cool’ on Sunday!” the club said in a generic statement that adds absolutely nothing to the story. So far the fat Brazilian Ronaldo is the only footballer to have been given a guest spot as himself on the show when he appeared in the season 18th show ‘Marge Gamer.’
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SPORTS NEWS
Australian Open So, apparently there are tennis tournaments other than Wimbledon… You learn something new every day. Hang on, does that mean that Tim Henman had some success in his career? Let me check. Come on Tim! Oh, never mind. Anyway, from 14th – 27th January this year’s Australian Open will feature the great, the good, and the how the fuck are they professional athletes of the tennis world competing in Melbourne Park for a share of AUD$30m – making it the highest paying tournament of all-time. Apparently there are doubles and mixed doubles titles as well, but as they’re only for broken down former greats and less talented siblings we’ll concentrate on the singles tournaments. Victoria Azarenka will be returning to defend her title from the onslaught of the terrifying, but strangely arousing, Serena Williams fresh off her being named the WTA Tour Player of the Year for the fourth time due to her Wimbledon, U.S. Open, and Olympics wins. And retaining the crown may be one of the finest achievements of a woman on a tennis court since that poster of the girl scratching her arse. (Incidentally, that joke celebrated its 40th birthday this year.) However, despite the presence of Maria Sharapova, it’s the men that will draw the most interest. It’s the same story at every tennis meet, with the usual favourites way ahead of the pack. Will it be Cristiano Ronaldo has also made an appearance, but in an ad for Nike rather than in an episode, while viagra-peddling Pele was lampooned in one show for being partial to the odd endorsement. A character resembling David Beckham helped cause a British invasion in another episode but Golden Balls himself was deemed ‘not famous enough’ for a full guest star spot in 2010. Considering pop turd Ke$ha got a slot on the show we think that’s a bit rich, but who are we to question the show that brought us such great catchphrases as “Doh!”, “Do the Bartman” and “Yabba dabba doo!”
Stars Align For United Down Under
Manchester United fans better pray they win the league this season because their pre-season for next year is already fucked after the club’s marketing men booked them for an energy-sapping trip to Sydney. No doubt the purple-nosed one will try to keep most of his stars at home for a game that makes no sense in terms of pre-season preparation, but seeing as the club are contractually obliged to put out a strong team, we can at least expect Anderson to make an appearance. Jordan-shagging striker Dwight Yorke, who is still celebrated in Sydney for helping the club win the A-League title back when the competition was on a par with Conference-level football , says the game – which will pit United against an A-League All Stars team – will be a one-sided affair. If United bother turning up.
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the resilience of Novak Djokovic? The finesse of Roger Federer? The power of Rafa Nadal? Or the off-putting misery of Andy Murray? The margins between the four best players in the world are so slim right now that it’s difficult to pick a hands-down winner, or even which among that group is a recognised leader. On any given day the qualities of one could trump the qualities of the other – as was shown with Murray’s victory over Djokovic in the U.S. Open when he managed to break, physically and mentally, the durable Serb. But Djokovic is the man in form at the moment, and it would be a brave man to bet against him retaining his Australian Open crown. I am not a brave man. Having beaten Roger Federer at the ATP World Tour Finals in November, he finished the season atop the world rankings for the second consecutive year and marginally stands-out as the guy who’ll most likely win a shit load of cash. Though, we’d be crazy to write off the others, as Federer may be the greatest player of all-time and is yet to show signs of tennis’ version of an alarming Fernando Torres-esque slip into ‘’A full-strength Man United … I’ve got to be honest, it’s not going to be easy for the A-League guys,’’ Yorke said. ‘’They are going to find it extremely difficult, but I’m sure it’s a great experience for some of these guys who may not have the opportunity to play against these world-class players like Wayne Rooney and Van Persie. People like Giggsy and Scholesy are still there.’’ But while naysayers like BBM think United won’t bother bringing a decent team, the club’s director of communications Phil Townsend assured fans it wouldn’t be a reserve XI. ‘’I think the main thing to say about the strength of the squad is that there’s obviously not a major tournament here or in Europe or a World Cup so we’ll bring the strongest squad we possibly can,’’ he said. ‘’Obviously injuries play their part but we’ll be bringing a very, very strong squad.’’ Which sounds kind of similar to the “we’ll put out a very competitive side” line that the big Premier League clubs say just before fielding 11 youth players in the League Cup.
Open Season On Wozniacki
The Australian Open is just around the corner, and with Andy Murray having finally won something, we can’t write our usual xenophobic diatribe about how the shit Scot is going to let us down again. Bah. Luckily, tennis’s other lovable loser Caroline Wozniacki has filled the void. The slightly disturbed golf-star shagging hotty, who still hasn’t won a
oblivion. Too, on their day Nadal and Murray are capable of competing with any player of any era; however, let’s not forget that Nadal is coming back from a knee injury so there’s no guarantee he’ll be at full strength, and that Andy Murray is still a British player. So, as it stands, Djokovic is our pick ahead of Federer to win the 2013 Australian Open. You may say, ‘Oh, sticking your neck out by picking the world’s no.1 player, big deal,’ and you’d be right. What the hell do we know? By Peter Simpson grand slam, sparked a racism storm in an exhibition match after shoving a towel down her top and up her skirt for an impression of Serena Williams. Although everyone at the match laughed and took it in the good humour it was intended, the PC police were out in force online. On Tumblr, one blogger wrote: “This isn’t “harmless fun” as one article described it. its racist. out and outright racism. mocking and making fun of the bodies of black women for a laugh? real funny, stupid white girl. real real funny.’ Another blogger wrote: “It may have been done in “jest,” but I love how people can can turn a black woman’s body and sexuality into a caricature. However, we should not have the autonomy to celebrate any successes of our own.” Of course, all this ignores the fact that women of all races have big/small tits, and big/small asses – and also the fact that she’s done it before, but why let the facts get in the way of a good controversy. Williams also couldn’t give a shit, and frequently takes the piss out of her own body shape. Before the match, she even tweeted: “Hummmmm do they make Brazilian bikinis for ummm well..... Me???”. We certainly hope they do Serena, if only because we’d like to see Wozniacki wear one for her next impression.
By Richard Gadsby
CRYSTAL BALLS
Horoscopes
Sagittarius
This is a test horoscope. Do not reply to this horoscope.
Aries
You donate all your money and worldly possessions to charity, assured in the knowledge that your good deed will be “paid forward”. You keep repeating that mantra to yourself: you have to give money away to get it. Two months of sharing a piss-stained blanket with a crazy homeless man in Hyde Park changes your outlook.
Libra
You spend a week in the pub debating whether doing anal with Anne Hathaway would be any different than bumming your best mate now she’s chopped off all her hair. Unfortunately, you don’t have a best mate, in fact all your friends are imaginary and the ‘great Hathaway bum debate’ is basically just you rocking back and forth in a corner of a bar talking to yourself. Freak.
Capricorn
You decide to play a prank on a work colleague who keeps leaving their food in tupperware boxes in the fridge with ‘Don’t Touch’ stickers plastered all over them. You check patiently every day until, bingo, the unsuspecting fool has brought in a chocolate mousse. After feasting on the creamy delight you take the empty bowl into a toilet cubicle, take your trousers off, squat down and refill it in a way that would make mister whippy proud.
Taurus
Good news! That hairy Dutch lass who cries while she’s giving you blowjobs has decided to get her upper lip waxed. The bad news is all that hair was hiding a honker the size of Ron Jeremy’s cock. Not to worry, you soon find ways to put this latest discovery to good use, with exciting results!
Pisces
God it’s hot today. Sort your own horoscope out Pisces, I’m off to wash my fanny. It smells like a bucket of gutted fish down there.
Gemini
Sound the alarm! You win a competition and are sent Nicki Minaj’s lady lumps in the post.
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Scorpio
As Wet, Wet, Wet once crooned on the soundtrack to Four Weddings and a Funeral: “It’s written on the wind, it’s everywhere I go.” Which is an accurate description of a massive fart you let out on a hot date this month. Love certainly isn’t “all around” for you that night, unless you’re talking about self-love. Shame because you really liked this girl. In fact, you spend the next few weeks hiding in a bush outside her bedroom and when she finally threatens to call the police after spotting you getting soaked during a storm, you say “Is it raining? I hadn’t noticed”. It almost makes her laugh, but then you do another massive fart. Doh!
Leo
You’ve decided to cash in on the 50 Shades of Grey phenomenon by writing a kinky bestseller based on your own memoirs. So instead of an erotic story about a middle-aged woman who gets off on having her ass spanked by a ping-pong paddle, you write about a sad lonely pervert who listens to the couple next door having sex while wanking and crying. On the plus side, the book does get a lot of interest from publishers. On the down side, it’s only after you’re imprisoned for being a peeping tom that they decide to take notice due to all the publicity. Your follow-up novel, Rectal Ruminations, is based on your time in prison.
Virgo
You tell your mates you’re going to see The Hobbit but instead sneak in to see Les Miserables and cry every time Hugh Jackman sings. This isn’t so bad if you’re a woman but, if you’re a man, it means you’re officially a bit ‘that way inclined’ (which is a polite way of saying you like it up the shitter).
Aquarius
Was one of your new years’ resolutions to put on 15 kilograms in January? If so, congratulations.
Cancer
A tall grey-bearded bloke with a pointy hat and staff calls at your door and asks if your flatmate is in. You tell him Bilbo’s out and he leaves, disappointed. After shutting the door, you hear a scraping noise and open it to find the old bloke trying to scratch something into the wood. You tell him to fuck off before you call the police. Thus the Lord of the Rings trilogy is aborted before it even begins.
ASK CRYSTAL & JOKES
Ask Crystal Dear Crystal, I’ve been smoking since I was 16 but I’ve decided to quit as my new years’ resolution. The thing is I’ve tried quitting before and haven’t had much success. From hypnosis to nicotine patches, nothing seems to work for me. Is there any advice you can give that might help me out? I’m really desperate. Yours, Rebecca Dear Rebecca, That’s the thing about addictions Rebecca, if you try to end them, they leave a hole that needs to be filled. And what better way to fill that hole than with another addiction? I’d suggest becoming a borderline alcoholic backed up with a healthy appetite for sex with strangers. The two pretty much go hand in hand anyway, just go out every other night, get pissed, and let random men fuck you in whatever nightclub cubicle/ back alley you happen to find yourself in. When you’re feeling a bit more confident, why not try multiple partners? With a long history of smoking, you should be used to putting disgusting things into your mouth 10 times a day. Good luck. Dear Crystal, I really love my girlfriend but a few weeks ago a new girl started at work and we became good friends. As
Jokes
I saw a piece of chewing gum in the urinal today. I thought, “That must have been really painful.” Dave, Surry Hills I accidentally dialed 999 from my mobile phone last night. So I set my house on fire so I wouldn’t look stupid. Brian, Darlinghurst “Bagsy top bunk!” I screamed as I jumped on the bed. Later, as Big Terry brutally sodomised me I realised that prison was not going to be as easy as I’d first thought. Tim, Bondi To this day, the boy that used to bully me at school still takes my lunch money. On the plus side, he makes great subway sandwiches. Steve, St Kilda One of the toddlers on the Intensive Care Unit is playing with a toy donkey. ICU baby, shaking that ass. Gerard, Richmond Why does everyone keep saying “I need a friend with benefits”? Just go to Liverpool, everyone’s on benefits there. Richard, Kings Cross Lady: Do you smoke? Man: Yes Lady: How many packs a day? Man: 3 packs Lady: How much per pack Man: £10.00 Lady: And how long have you been smoking? Man: 15 years Lady: So 1 pack cost £10.00 and you have 3 packs
the weeks went on my girlfriend started to become more and more jealous of my new friend. In the end, we had a blazing row and I went out for a drink with my mates. While I was out, I bumped into the girl from work and because I was a bit drunk, I told her all my problems. She was so understanding and told me if I needed somewhere to stay for the night, I could always go back to hers. Looking back, maybe I was being naïve, but I went back to hers and we ended up having sex. Now she’s told me she’s going to tell my girlfriend what I did unless I dump her – but I really love my girlfriend and am desperate to patch things up. I know I should come clean, but I’m scared of losing her. What should I do? Yours, Ben Dear Ben, Why be honest when you can have your cake and fuck it by being incredibly dishonest? Just tell your girlfriend that she was right to be jealous about that lass at work because she came on to you at the pub the other night and got all hysterical when you told her to back off. Women love being told their right – especially about other women – so if this girl does tell your missus what happened, she’ll just laugh in her face and call her desperate. Ta dah! Problem sorted.
a day which puts your spending each month at £900. In one year, it would be £10,800 correct? Man: Correct Lady: If in 1 year you spend £10,800 not accounting for inflation, the past 15 years puts your spending at £162,000 correct? Man: Correct Lady: Do you know that if you hadn’t smoked, that money could have been put in a step-up interest savings account and after accounting for compound interest for the past 15 years, you could have now bought a Ferrari? Man: Do you smoke? Lady: No Man: Where’s your fucking Ferrari then? Jim, Fremantle Some men think that using a moisturiser after you’ve had a shave is a bit gay. I don’t, I just think it makes my legs lovely and soft. Derek, Brisbane
Dear Crystal, I hate going to bars and restuarants, as I can’t face using the urinal. Unfortunately, my little fella is a bit littler than the average little fella. It doesn’t affect my bedroom exploits, as my acne and beer gut normally prevent me from meeting girls anyway. I am sick of always usuing cubicles and getting smirks when I come out. What can I do? Yours, Matt Dear Matt, Oh dear, oh dear. Wee Matt, you sound like a real catch. Did you come to oz thinking that you might have more chance with Aussie girls than British ones? Ha. Althought you’re a bit of a lost cause, the only think left for you is to confront your fears. The next time you go to a bar, stand in the middle of the dancefloor with your trousers and pants down and scream ‘THIS IS ME’. People will respect you, and will forget about your size, especially any passing Aussies rules or rugby playyers. I would advise Oxford Street though.
How many Countdown contestants does it take to change a BLIHBULGT? Jack, Perth A policeman pulled me over on the motorway today. “Hang on a minute,” I said to my wife on the phone. “Yes, officer?” He said, “You’re talking on your mobile.” I said, “I know. I’m just telling my wife that I’m stuck in traffic and I may be home a few hours late.” “There is no traffic,” he replied. What a cunt, I was winking at him as well. Phil, Williamstown My son asked me why oysters are Aphrodisiacs. “Not sure son, maybe because they smell like fannies.” “Ugh, is that what mum’s is like?” “You tell me,” I replied, “you were the last one near it.” Oliver, Woolloomooloo
So Tulisa’s new album has flopped... She must have tried to suck it off. Harry, Fitzroy I was shagging my blonde girlfriend when she said, “Cum all over me and I will not leave your bedroom until I’ve licked it all up.” 3 years on she’s still in my bedroom. Fuck knows how my jizz got onto her elbow. Mike, Brunswick My girlfriend finally laid all her cards on the table, and told me she had an abusive father and cancer. She always beats me at ‘X-Factor Top Trumps’. Will, Redfern
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TRAVEL NEW ZEALAND & FIJI
Things to do in New Zealand
SKYDIVING
Skydive Lake Wanaka Ltd 14, Mustang Lane Wanaka Airport State Highway 6 Wanaka, South Island NZ Tel: +64 3 443 7207 or FREEphone 0800 786 877 info@skydivewanaka.com www.skydivewanaka.com Nzone ‘The Ultimate Jump’ Queenstown & Rotorua Tel: 0800 376 796 skydive@nzone.biz www.nzone.biz SkydivingNZ.com New Zealand Skydiving School FREEPHONE: 0800 NZSKYDIVE Email: info@skydivingnz.com
RAFTING
RANGITATA RAFTS Peel Forest RD20 South Canterbury, NZ Tel: + 64 3 696 3534 New Zealand Freephone: 0800 251 251 info@rafts.co.nz www.rafts.co.nz
JET BOATING Shotover Jet
The World’s Most Exciting Jet Boat Ride, and the only company permitted to operate in the spectacular Shotover River Canyons.
Shotover Jet Beach, Gorge Road Arthurs Point, Queenstown, New Zealand Free Phone (NZ only): 0800 SHOTOVER Phone: +64 3 442 8570 Fax: +64 3 442 7467 reservations@shotoverjet.co.nz www.shotoverjet.com
Glacier Guiding Fox Glacier Guiding 44 Main Rd, Po Box 38, Fox Glacier, NZ Ph: +64 3 751 0825 Freephone (NZ only): 0800 111 600 info@foxguides.co.nz www.foxguides.co.nz
Take a breathtaking guided trip on the West Coast’s longest and less crowded glacier amidst fascinating ice formations with NZ’s most experienced glacier guiding company. Offering a full range of trips to suit all fitness levels.
river boarding
Mad Dog RiverBoarding 37 Shotover Street Queenstown New Zealand Ph: +64 3442 7797 www.riverboarding.co.nz
ACCOMMODATION Christchurch
City Oasis 180 Peterborough Street, Christchurch, NZ Ph: + 64 3366 9531 cityoasis@xtra.co.nz www.kiwi-backpackers.co.nz Coker’s Backpackers 52 manchester Street, Christchurch, NZ Ph: + 64 3379 8580 enquiries@cokers.co.nz www.cokers.co.nz
BAY OF ISLANDS
Bay Adventurer Backpackers & Apartments 28, Kings Road, Paihia, Bay of Islands, NZ Ph: +64 9 402 5162 Info@bayadventurer.co.nz www.bayadventurer.co.nz
Kaikoura Adelphi Lodge Main Street, Kaikoura, NZ Ph: + 64 3319 5141 Fax: + 64 3319 6786 adelphilodge@xtra.co.nz www.kiwi-backpackers.co.nz
Queenstown
auckland
Bungi Backpackers 15 Sydney Street, Queenstown, NZ Ph: + 64 3442 8725 Fax: + 64 3442 8729 www.kiwi-backpackers.co.nz
Nomads Auckland 16-20 Fort Street, Auckland, NZ Freecall: 0508 NOMADS Phone: +64 9 300 9999 bookings@nomadsauckland.com nomadshostels.com $5 off first night (min 3 night stay) if you mention this ad
Southern Laughter Lodge 4 Isle Street, Queenstown, NZ Ph: + 64 3441 8828 southernlaughter@xtra.co.nz www.kiwi-backpackers.co.nz Nomads Queenstown 5-11 Church Street, Queenstown, NZ Freecall: 0508 NOMADS Phone: +64 3 441 3922 info@nomadsqueenstown.com nomadshostels.com Queenstown’s brand new flashpackers, now open with rave reviews.
Franz Josef Glacier Chateau Franz 8 Cron Street, Franz Josef Glacier, NZ Ph: + 64 3752 0738 www.kiwi-backpackers.co.nz
Nomads Fat Camel 38 Fort Street, Auckland, NZ Freecall: 0508 NOMADS Phone: +64 9 307 0181 bookings@nomadsfatcamel.com nomadshostels.com $5 off first night if you mention this ad.
wellington
Nomads Capital 118 Wakefield Street, Wellington, NZ Freecall: 0508 NOMADS Phone: +64 4 978 7800 info@nomadscapital.com nomadshostels.com Central city backpackers with FREE MEAL every night.
Glow Worm Cottages 7 Cron Street, Franz Josef Glacier, NZ Ph: + 64 3752 0172 glowwormcottages@xtra.co.nz www.kiwi-backpackers.co.nz
Fiji ACCOMMODATION
THINGS TO DO
BEACHCOMBER ISLAND RESORT Mamanuca Island Group Ph: + 679 6661500 Fax: + 679 6664496 info@beachcomberfiji.com www.beachcomberfiji.com
ROBINSON CRUSOE ISLAND Fiji budget accommodation Ph: (679) – 6281999 (679) – 6282901 robinsoncrusoe@connect.com.fj www.robinsoncrusoeislandfiji.com
THE BEACHOUSE Coral Coast, Fiji Islands Fiji phone: 679 6530500 Free call (within Fiji): 0800 6530530 Australia info line: 07 55320412 info@fijibeachouse.com www.fijibeachouse.com
THE UPRISING BEACH RESORT 679-345-2200 Beach RoadPacific Harbour P.O.Box 416 Pacific Habour Fiji Islands enquiries@uprisingbeachresort.com www.uprisingbeachresort.com
SMUGGLERS COVE BEACH RESORT * HOTEL P.O.Box 10409 Nadi Airport. Ph: (679) 672 6578 or 672 4578 Fax: (679) 672 0662 reservations@smugglerscove.com.fj www.smugglersbeachfiji.com, Skype name: Smugglers Cove HORIZON BEACH RESORT Wailoaloa Beach, Nadi Bay, Fiji Ph: +679 672 2832 or 4578 Fax: +679 672 0662 www.horizonbeachfiji.com
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NADI BAY RESORT HOTEL Wailoaloa Beach Road Private Mail Bag NAP 0359, Nadi Airport Ph: (679) 6723599 Fax: (679) 6720092 nadibay@connect.com.fj www.fijinadibayhotel.com/ NADI BAY DOWNTOWN BACKPACKERS Nadi, Fiji Islands Ph: [679] 670 0600 pacvalley@connect.com.fj
Skydiving
SKYDIVE FIJI 11 Zahoor Road, Nadi, Fiji Isalnds Tel: +679-6728166 Fax: +679-6721415 admin@skydivefiji.com.fj www.skydivefiji.com.fj ‘Incredible views of Fiji’s Islands and Reefs; Beach or Resort landings’
Scuba Diving
SUBSURFACE FIJI ADVENTURE DIVING & WATERSPORTS Subsurface Fiji Adventure Diving and Watersports Beachcomber, Treasure, Malolo, Walu Beach, Funky Fish and Musket Cove Island Resorts, Fiji Tel: +679 6666 738 info@subsurfacefiji.com www.subsurfacefiji.com
Things to do in Australia Skydiving SUNSHINE COAST SKYDIVERS 1 Pathfinder Drive, Caloundra Airport, Sunshine Coast, QLD Ph: 07 5437 0211 Mob: 04 18 776 775 bookings@sunshinecoastskydivers.com.au www.sunshinecoastskydivers.com.au SOUTHERN SKYDIVERS Busselton Regional Airport, Bussleton, WA Free: 1300 449 669 skydive@southernskydivers.com.au www.southernskydivers.com.au SKYDIVE BYRON BAY Hanger 1, Tyagarah Airfield, NSW, 2481 Ph: 1800 800 840 or 02 6684 1323 info@skydivebyronbay.com www.skydivebyronbay.com The ultimate skydive experience Australia has to offer! SUNSHINE COAST SKYDIVERS 1 Pathfinder Drive, Caloundra, QLD, 4551 Ph: +61 7 5437 0211 Mob: +61 0418 776 775 bookings@sunshinecoastskydivers.com.au www.sunshinecoastskydivers.com.au/ SKYDIVE COFFS HARBOUR P.O. Box 351, Coffs Harbour, NSW, 2450 Ph: 0433 254 438 info@skydivecoffs.com.au www.skydivecoffs.com.au Beach landings in the heart of Coffs SKYDIVE THE REEF CAIRNS 51 Sheridan St, Cairns, QLD, 4870 Ph: 1800 800 840 info@skydivethereefcairns.com.au www.skydivethereefcairns.com.au SKYDIVE JURIEN BAY 36B Bashford St, Jurien Bay, WA, 6516 Ph: 0438 441 239 www.skydivejurienbay.com SKYDIVE MISSION BEACH 51 Sheridan St, Cairns, QLD, 4870 Ph: 1800 800 840 info@missionbeachskydive.com.au www.skydivemissionbeach.com.au Free transfers from Mission Beach & Cairns. Australia’s Highest jump and Beach Landings
Scuba Diving Australia
NINGLAOO WHALE SHARK & DIVE CENTRE Located inside reception at the Exmouth Cape Holiday Park: 3 Truscott Street, Exmouth, WA Ph: 1800 224 060 www.ningaloowhalesharkndive.com.au PRODIVE CAIRNS 116 Spence Street, Cairns, QLD, 4870 Ph: 07 4031 5255, www.prodivecairns.com THE SCUBA CENTRE Port Douglas-Cairns-Airlie Beach, 230 Sugarloaf Rd, Whitsunday Ph: 07 4946 1067 whitscub@gmail.com www.scubacentre.com.au
Adventure Tours
GOIN SOUTH Four days, two famous Aussie icons, one awesome tour Ph: 1800 009 858 www.goinsouth.com.au TEMPATION DOLPHIN SWIM Marina Pier, Holdfast Shores Marina Glenelg, SA, 5045 Ph: 0412 811 838 info@dolphinboat.com.au www.dolphinboat.com.au A J HACKET BUNGY JUMPING McGregor Road, Smithfield, QLD, 4878 Tel: 07 4057 7188 Free: 1800 622 888 cairns.reception@ajhackett.com www.cairns.ajhackett.com OCEAN RAFTING WHITSUNDAYS The Jetty, Coral Sea Resort, Airlie Beach, QLD Ph: 07 4946 6848 oceanrafting@airlie.net.au www.oceanrafting.com.au STAND UP PADDLE SURFING 3 Graham Colyer Drive, Agnes Water, QLD Ph: 07 4974 7874 / 07 4962 0210 Mob: 0422 806 235 info@1770sup.com.au www.1770sup.com.au MULGAS ADVENTURE 4 Traeger Avenue Alice Springs, NT, 0871 Ph: 08 9521 545 www.mulgas.com.au SURF & SUN AUSTRALIAN ADVENTURES Ph: 1800 786 386 08 8212 0211 info@surfandsun.com.au www.surfandsun.com.au KANGAROO ISLAND ADVENTURE TOURS Adelaide, SA Ph: 08 8202 8678 bookings@kiadventuretours.com.au www.kiadventuretours.com.au MINISTRY OF PAINTBALLING L4, 362 Kent St, Sydney, NSW, 2000 Ph:1800 646 478 Ph: 02 9262 2362 www.ministryofpaintball.com BRIDGE CLIMB SYDNEY Ph: 02 8274 7777 www.bridgeclimb.com PENRITH WHITE WATER RAFTING Ph: 02 4730 4333 booking@penrithwhitewater.com.au www.penrithwhitewater.com.au BALLOON SUNRISE PO Box 229 , Yarra Glen, VIC, 3775 Ph: 03 9730 2422 Free: 1800 HOTAIR (1800 468 247) info@hotairballooning.com.au www.hotairballooning.com.au
TRAVEL AUSTRALIA
Kite Surfing
KITESURF 1770 IKO Certified Kiteboarding school/Centre 3 Graham Colyer Drive, Agnes Wate, QLD Ph: 07 4974 7874 / 07 4962 0210 Mob: 0422 806 235 info@kitesurf1770.com.au www.kitesurf1770.com.au KITE REPUBLIC 10-18 Jacka Blvd. St.Kilda Sea Baths Complex, St.Kilda, 3182, Melbourne, VIC Ph: 03 95370644 Mob: +61 418583233 info@kiterepublic.com.au www.kiterepublic.com.au
SURF SCHOOLS
GREAT OCEAN ROAD SURFT TOURS 55B Surf Coast Highway, Torquay, Victoria, 3228 +61 3 5261 3730 info@gorsurftours.com.au www.gorsurftours.com.au GET WET SURF SCHOOL Ph: 1800 438 938 www.getwetsurf.com MOJO SURF Ph: 1800 113 044 www.mojosurf.com.au SURF SHACK Ph: 03 5155 4933 www.surfshack.com.au GO SURFING BYRON BAY Ph: 02 6685 7099 gosurfingbyronbay@gmail.com www.gosurfingbyronbay.com LETS GO SURFING Ph: 02 9365 1800 www.letsgosurfing.com.au SURFING AUSTRALIA Ph: 07 5599 3800 www.surfingaustralia.com Marine Charters ADVENTURE BAY CHARTERS 2 Jubilee Drive, Port Lincoln, SA, 5606 Ph: 04 8842 8862 info@adventurebaycharters.com.au www.adventurebaycharters.com.au KANGAROO MARINE CHARTERS 9 Chapman Terrace, Kingscote, Kangaroo Island, SA Ph: 0427 315 286 www.kimarineadventures.com ADVENTURE KAYAKING 7 Hastings Street, Glenelg South, SA Ph: 08 8295 8812 bookings@adventurekayak.com.au www.adventurekayak.com.au JET SKI SAFARIS Birth 56, Jetty Sea, Mariners Cove, Waterways, QLD Ph: 07 5526 3111 Mob: 0409 754 538 info@jetskisafaris.com.au www.jetskisafaris.com.au
PARADISE JET BOATING Jetty ‘C’ Mariners Cove Marina, Seaworld Drive, Main Beach Qld 4217 Ph: 1300 JET BOAT (1300 538 262) thrills@paradisejetboating.com.au www.paradisejetboating.com.au
Bike Riding Tours
ESCAPE GOAT Adelaide, SA Ph: 08 8121 8112 Mob: 0422 916289 info@escapegoat.com.au www.escapegoat.com.au
Zorb Balls
OZ BALL GOLD COAST Go Zorbing with Oz Ball. Ph: 07 5547 6300 info@ozball.com.au www.ozball.com.au
Wine and Beer Tours
PRIME MINI TOURS Melrose Park, SA, 5039 Ph: 1300 667 650 info@primeminitours.com www.primeminitours.com
HIDDEN SECRET TOURS Melbourne CBD Ph: 03 9663 3358 tours@hiddensecrettours.com www.hiddensecretstours.com CARLTON & UNITED BREWERY TOUR Cnr Thompson & Nelson Streets, Abbotsford, VIC Ph:(03) 9420 6800 www.carltonbrewhouse.com.au BIG NIGHT OUT Surfers Paradise Every Wednesday and Saturday Night www.GoldCoastBackpackers.net FROG & TOAD BAR HOP Cairns Every Wednesday and Friday Night Mob: 0418 184 646 partyincairns@bigpond.com www.partyincairns.com
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ACCOMMODATION LISTINGS New South Wales
Sydney
World Square Hostel 2/640 George St, Sydney NSW 2000 (02) 9267 5616 worldsquarehostel.com.au Sydney Backpackers 7 Wilmot St Sydney NSW 2000 Ph: 02 9267 7772 1800 88 77 66 (Free Call) info@sydneybackpackers.com www.sydneybackpackers.com Clovelly Hotel 381 Clovelly Road Clovelly Ph: (02) 9665 1214 office@clovellyhotel.com.au www.clovellyhotel.com.au Criterion Hotel 260 Pitt Street Sydney (crn Pitt & Park Streets) Ph: (02) 9264 3093 patk@criterianhotel.net.au www.criterionhotel.net.au Westend Backpackers 412 Pitt Street Sydney, NSW, 2000 Free: 1800 013 186 Ph: 02 9211 4588 bookings@westendbackpackers.com www.westendbackpackers.com See the CHURCH - Australia’s largest dorm! Jolly Swagman Backpackers Hostel 27 Orwell Street Kings Cross, NSW 2011 Free: 1800 805 870 Ph: 93586400 skype: jolly.swagman.backpackers stay@jollyswagman.com.au www.jollyswagman.com.au Bondi Backpackers 110 Campbell Parade Bondi Beach NSW 2026 Free: 1800 304 660 Ph: (02) 9130 4660 bookings@bondibackpackers.com.au www.bondibackpackers.com.au Oxford Court Accommodation Bondi Junction Mobile 0412547840 Cafesbs@bigpond.net.au Clean, affordable and friendly backpackers. Rooms for 1 to 4 people. Close to bus, train and shops. Rooms have TV, fridge, toaster, microwave, kitchenette, cutlery, crockery, sheets supplied. Laundry, internet and BBQ facilities. Prices range from $190 to $130 depending on the number of guests. The Globe Backpackers 40 Darlingurst Road Kings Cross, Sydney NSW 2011 Free: 1800 806 384 Ph: (02) 9326 9675 info@globebackpackers.com www.globebackpackers.com City Resort Hostel 103-105 Palmer St Woolloomooloo, NSW 2011 Ph: (02) 9357 3333 bookings@cityresort.com.au Skype: City Resort Hostel www.cityresort.com.au Show this ad for $5 off!
(Valid for new guests only. Min. 3 nights stay.)
The George Street Hotel 700A George Street Sydney NSW 2000 Ph: (02) 9211 1800 Fax: 02 9212 2884 Free: 1800 679 606 (Within Australia) booking@thegeorge.com.au www.thegeorge.com.au
Bounce Sydney 28 Chalmers Street, Sydney 2010 Free call 1800890897 Ph (02) 9281 2222 book@bouncehotel.com.au www.bouncehotel.com.au Lord Wolseley Hotel 265 Bulwara Rd Ultimo, Sydney 2007 Ph: (02) 9660 1731 info@lordwolseleyhotel.com.au www.lordwolseleyhotel.com.au Porterhouse Hotel 233 Riley St Surry Hills NSW 2010 Ph: (02) 9211 4454 info@porterhouse.com.au www.Porterhouse.com.au Big Hostel Single and double & Dorm rooms available Max 4 bed dorms. 212 Elizabeth Street, Surry Hills Sydney NSW 2010 Ph: (02) 92816030 Free: 1800 212 244 reception@bighostel.com www.bighostel.com O’Malley’s Hotel 228 William Street, Kings Cross Sydney, NSW 2011 Ph: 02 9357 2211 admin@omalleyshotel.com.au www.omalleyshotel.com.au Sydney Central Hostel 428 Pitt Street Sydney 2000 Ph: (02) 9211 7323 stay@sydneycentralhostel.com.au www.sydneycentralhostel.com.au The Royal Hotel 370 Abercrombie St, Darlington, NSW, 2008 Ph: (02) 9698 8557 info@royal.com.au www.royal.com.au Kanga House backpackers 141 Victoria Street, Kings Cross, Sydney Ph: (02) 9357 7897 www.KangaHouse.com.au
Sydney Northern Beaches
Sydney Beachouse - YHA 4 Collaroy St, Collaroy, 2097 Ph: +61 2 9981 1177 mail@sydneybeachouse.com.au www.sydneybeachouse.com.au Guaranteed jobs/work all year. Cheap weekly rates by the beach with free Surfboard, Bodyboard & Bike hire
Sydneys Southern Beaches
Cronulla Beach YHA Level 1, 40 -42 Kingsway Cronulla Sydney, 2230 Ph: 02 9527 7772 enquiries@cronullabeachyha.com www.cronullabeachyha.com www.yha.com.au
PORT STEPHENS
Melaleuca Surfside Backpackers 2 Koala Place, One Mile Beach, NSW 2316 Ph: (02) 4981 9422 Mobile: 0427 200 950 melaleucabackpacker@bigpond.com www.melaleucabackpackers.com.au Hunter Valley Hunter Valley YHA 100 Wine Country Drive Nulkaba, Hunter Valley, NSW Ph: 02 4991 3278 huntervalley@yhansw.org.au www.yha.com.au
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Katoomba
Katoomba Mountain Backpackers Lodge 31 Lurline st Katoomba, NSW Ph: 04782 3933 stay@katoombabackpackers.com.au www.katoombabackpackers.com.au SPECIAL WINTER DEAL, STAY 2 NIGHTS GET THE 3RD NIGHT FREE!!!!!!
Byron Bay
Aquarius Backpackers 16 Lawson Street Byron Bay NSW 2481 Ph: (02) 6685-7663 Free: 1800 028 909 info@aquarius-backpackers.com.au www.aquarius-backpackers.com.au Nomads Byron Bay 1 Lawson Lane, Byron Bay, NSW 2481 Ph: 02 6680 7966 Free: 1800 766 673 bookings@nomadsbyronbay.com nomadshostels.com Arts Factory Lodge 1 Skinners Shoot Road, Byron Bay, NSW Ph: 02 6685 7709 info@artsfactory.com.au www.artsfactory.com.au An essential part of your journey
Nambucca Heads
Nambucca Backpackers 2 Pacific Highway, Nambucca Heads, NSW 2448 Ph: (02) 6568-6360 info@nambuccabackpackers.com.au www.nambuccabackpackers.com.au
Lake Tabourie
Lake Tabourie Tourist Park Princes Hwy, Lake Tabourie, NSW 2539 Free call: 1300 559 966 tabourie@shoalhaven.nsw.gov.au www.holidayhaven.com.au/tabourie
Queensland Brisbane
Tinbilly Travellers 466 George St, Brisbane City, Qld 4000 Ph: (07) 3238 5888 Free: 1800 44 66 46 reservations@tinbilly.com www.tinbilly.com Free Tinbilly Limited Edition T-shirt With presentation of this BBM Ad The Deck 117 Harcourt St, New Farm Brisbane QLD 4005 Ph: 0433 777 061 the_deck@live.com.au Designed with the working Traveler in Mind. Minimum 2 week stay Base QLD Backpackers 308 Edward st Brisbane QLD 4000 Ph: 07 3211 2433 palace@stayatbase.com www.stayatbase.com BUNK 11-21 Gipps St, Fortitude Valley, Qld, 4006 Ph: +61 7 3257 3644 Free: 1800 682 865 info@bunkbrisbane.com.au www.bunkbrisbane.com.au Brisbane City YHA 392 Upper Roma St, Brisbane QLD 4000 Ph: (07) 3236 1004 brisbanecity@yha.com.au www.yha.com.au
Goldcoast
Trekkers Backpackers 22 White Street, Goldcoast, QLD, 4215 Ph: (07) 55915616 Free : 1800 100 004 info@trekkersbackpackers.com.au www.trekkersbackpackers.com.au
Aquarius Backpackers 44 Queen Street Gold Coast, Queensland Ph: 07 5527 1300 Free:1800 229 955 info@aquariusbackpackers.com.au www.aquariusbackpackers.com.au Surfers Paradise YHA at Main Beach Mariners Cove, 70 Seaworld Drive Main Beach, Surfers Paradise 4217 Ph: (07) 5571 1776 surfersparadise@yha.com.au www.yha.com.au Backpackers in Paradise 40 Peninsular Drive Central Surfers Paradise Queensland, 4217 Ph: (07) 5538 4344 Free: 1800 268 621 info@backpackersinparadise.com www.backpackersinparadise.com Surf N Sun Beachside Backpackers 3323 Surfers Paradise Blvd, Surfers Paradise, Gold Coast, QLD 4217 Ph: (07) 5592 2363 Free: 1800 678 194 info@surfnsun-goldcoast.com www.surfnsun-goldcoast.com Sleeping Inn Surfers 26 Peninsular Drive Surfers Paradise QLD Ph: 07 5592 4455 info@sleepinginn.com.au www.sleepinginn.com.au Coolangatta Sands Hostel Cnr Griffith & McLean Streets Coolangatta 4225 QLD Ph: 07 5536 7472 hostel@taphouse.com.au www.taphouse.com.au
ISLANDER BACKPACKERS RESORT Cnr. Beach Road and Surfers Paradise Blvd Surfers Paradise QLD 4217 Ph: +61 7 5538 8000 Toll free: 1800 074 393
res@islander.com.au
www.islander.com.au/Backpackers Surfers Paradise Backpackers rsrt Backpackers Resort,2837 Gold Coast Highway, Queensland 4217 Ph: 07 5592 4677 Free: 1800 282 800 spbr@bigpond.net.au www.surfersparadisebackpackers.com.au
Noosa
Nomads Noosa 44 Noosa Drive, Noosa Heads, QLD 4567 Phone: 07 5447 3355 bookings@nomadsnoosa.com www.nomadsnoosa.com
Hervey Bay
Nomads Hervey 408 The Esplanade, Torquay, Hervey Bay, QLD 4655 Phone: 07 4125 3601 bookings@nomadshervey.com www.nomadshervey.com
TOWN OF 1770
(Between Bunderberg & Rockhampton) Cool Bananas 2 Spring Road, 1770, Queensland, 4677 Ph: (07) 4974 7660 Free: 1800 227 660 wheeler_danny@hotmail.com www.coolbananas.net.au
1770 Southern Cross (Backpackers) 2694 Round Hill Rd Agnes Water QLD 4677 Ph: 0749747225 info@1770southerncross.com www.1770southerncross.com 1770 Beachside Backpackers 12 Captain Cook Drive PO Box 212, Agnes Water QLD 4677 Ph: 07 4974 7200 enquiries@1770beachsidebackpacker.com.au www.1770beachsidebackpacker.com.au
Cairns
CAirns Share House 17 Scott Street, Cairns, QLD 4870 Ph: (+617) 4041 1875 info@cairns-sharehouse.com www.cairns-sharehouse.com Nomads Cairns 341 Lake Street, Cairns, QLD 4870 Free: 1800 737 736 bookings@nomadscairns.com www.nomadshostels.com Stay 4 nights, pay only 3! Or $5 off 1st night with this ad. Cairns Central YHA 20-26 McLeod Street, Cairns QLD 4870 Ph: (+617) 4051 0772 cairnscentral@yha.com.au www.yha.com.au Gilligans backpackers hotel & resort 57-59 Grafton Street, Cairns, QLD Ph: (07) 4041 6566 Free: 1800 556 995 reservations@gilligans.com.au www.gilligans.com.au Nomads Esplanade 93 The Esplanade, Cairns, QLD 4870 Ph: 07 4031 7477 Free: 1800 175 716 bookings@nomadsesplanade.com www.nomadshostels.com Dreamtime Travellers Rest 4 Terminus Street (corner of Bunda st.& Terminus st.) Cairns 4870 Queensland Ph: (07) 4031 6753 info@dreamtimehostel.com www.dreamtimehostel.com Globetrotters International 154-156 Lake st Cairns City QLD Free: 1800 22 55 87 info@globetrottersinternational.com.au www.globetrottersinternational.com.au Nomads Cairns Beach House 239 Sheridan Street, Cairns, QLD 4870 Tel: 1800 229 228 or (07) 4041 0431 bookings@nomadsbeachhouse.com www.nomadsworldhotels.com Dorm from just $12 The Northern Greenhouse 117 Grafton Street Cairns QLD 4000 Ph: 1800 000 541 northern@friendlygroup.com.au www.northerngreenhouse.com.au JJ’s Backpackers 11-13 Charles Street Cairns QLD 4870 Ph - (07) 4051 7642 Free- 1800 666 336 jjsbackpackers@ledanet.com.au www.jjsbackpackers.com
Mission Beach
Absolute Backpackers 28 Wongaling Beach Road Mission Beach Queensland 4852 Ph: 07 4068 8317 Free: 1800 688 316 info@absolutebackpackers.com.au www.absolutebackpackers.com.au Scotty’s Beach House 167 Reid Road, Mission Beach, QLD, 4852 Ph: 07 4068 8676 info@scottysbeachhouse.com.au www.scottysbeachhouse.com.au
Whitsundays
Barefoot Lodge Whitsunday Passage, Whitsundays, QLD Ph: +61 7 4946 9400 Free: 1800 075 125 longisland@oceanhotels.com.au www.oceanhotels.com.au
Airlie Beach
Airlie Beach YHA 394 Shute Harbour Road Airlie Beach QLD Phone: (07) 4946 6312 Free:1800 247 251 airliebeach@yha.com.au www.yha.com.au MAGNUMS/Whitsunday Village Travel 366 Shute Harbour Rd, Airlie Beach, QLD Ph: (07) 4964 1199 or 07 4964 1188 Free: 1800 624 634 travel@magnums.com.au www.magnums.com.au
cape tribulation
PK’s Jungle Village Cape Tribulation Road (PMB 7) Cape Tribulation QLD 4873 Tel: 07 4098 0040 info@pksjunglevillage.com www.pksjunglevillage.com Ferntree Rainforest Lodge Camelot Close, Cape Tribulation, QLD Australia Freecall:1800 987 077 International Telephone: +61 7 4098 0033 Availability and Rates: www.thebookingbutton.com.au reservationsferntree@oceanhotels.com.au www.oceanhotels.com.au
rainbow beach
Pippies Beach House Cnr of Spectrum Street & Cypress Avenue, Rainbow Beach FREEPHONE: 1800425356 info@pippiesbeachhouse.com.au www.pippiesbeachhouse.com.au 30mins FREE Internet on presentation of this ad PLUS FREE Breakfast & Eco Whale-Watching for all!
Western Australia scarborough
western beach lodge 6 Westborough Street Scarborough, Western Australia, 6019 Ph. (08) 9245 1624 westernbeach@iprimus.com.au www.westernbeach.com
COTTESLOE
ocean beach backpackers Cnr Marine Parade & Eric St Cottesloe Beach Ph: 08 9384 5111 stay@oceanbeachbackpackers.com www.oceanbeachbackpackers.com
Perth
Rainbow Lodge 150 Claisebrook Rd Perth, WA (Have just moved around the corner) Ph: (08) 9227-1818 or 0417 927 529 Ron@rainbowlodge.com.au www.rainbowlodge.com.au One World Backpackers 162 Aberdeen St Northbridge, PERTH WA Ph: (08) 9228 8206 www.oneworldbackpackers.com.au Mountway Holiday Apartments 36 Mount St,West Perth WA 6005 Ph: (08) 9321 8307 info@mountwayapartments.com.au www.mountwayapartments.com.au
WWBritannia on William 253 William Street, Northbridge 6003 Perth WA Ph: 08 9227 6000 Fax: 08 9227 6611 www.perthbritannia.com YMCA Accommodation Jewell House 180 Goderich St. Perth, WA 6000 tel: (08) 9325 8488 fax: (08) 9221 4694 email: jewellhouse@ymca.org.au www.ymcajewellhouse.com.au Underground Backpackers 268 Newcastle Street Northbridge WA 6003 Ph: (08) 9228 3755 www.undergroundbackpackers.com.au EXCLUSIVE BACKPACKERS 158 Adelaide Tce, Perth 6000 Ph: (08) 9221 9991 exclusivebackpackers@hotmail.com www.exclusivebackpackers.com Beatty Lodge 235 Vincent Street West Perth WA 6005 Ph: (08) 9227 1521 www.beattylodge.com.au info@beattylodge.com.au Billabong Resort 381 Beaufort Street, Perth Ph: 08 9328 7720 bookings@billabongresort.com.au www.billabongresort.com.au Globe Backpackers 561 Wellington Street, cnr. Queen St, Perth, WA Ph: 08 9321 4080 globebak@iinet.net.au www.globebackpackers.com.au The Old Swan Barracks 2 - 8 Francis Street Perth (Northbridge)6000 Ph: 08 9428 0000 www.theoldswanbarracks.com
monkey mia
Monkey Mia Dolphin Resort Monkey Mia Road, Shark Bay 3537 Ph: +61 8 9948 1320 monkeymia@aspenresorts.com.au www.monkeymia.com.au
Kununurra
Kununurra Backpackers Adventure Centre 24 Nutwood Crescent, Kununurra WA 6743 Ph: (08) 9169 1998 or 1800 641 998 www.kununurrabackpackers.com.au info@kununurrabackpackers.com.au
broome
Beaches of Broome 4 Sanctuary Road, Cable Beach, Broome, WA, 6725 Ph : 1300 881 031 bookings@beachesofbroome.com.au www.beachesofbroome.com.au
Victoria Mildura
redcliffs hotel 25 Jacaranda St, Red Cliffs VIC 3496 (03) 5024 1704
Halls Gap
Brambuk Backpackers Hostel 330 Grampians Road, Halls Gap, VictoriaPh: 03 5356 4250 bramback@netconnect.com.au www.brambuk.com.au/backpackers.htm Brambuk Backpackers offers travellers an affordable and comfortable range of accommodation, ideally situated within the stunning Grampians National Park.
Melbourne
Easystay Motel and Studio Apartments Great accommodation at fantastic rates Rooms available for up to 4 people Book online and save $$$ www.easystay.com.au Or call 1300 30 17 30 Melbourne Central YHA 562 Flinders Street, Melbourne 3000 Ph: (+613) 9621 2523 melbcentral@yhavic.org.au www.yha.com.au Centrally located, close to public transport and major attractions. Free city circle tram on doorstep,24 hour reception, wifi and Skype available. Rooftop deck. Melbourne Metro YHA 78 Howard Street, North Melbourne 3051 Phone: (03) 9329 8599 melbmetro@yhavic.org.au www.yha.com.au Winner of the Victorian Tourism Award for Best Backpacker Accommodation three years running! 24 hour reception. Exford Hotel 199 Russell Street , Melbourne Vic 3000 Ph: 03 9663 2697 res@exfordhotel.com.au www.exfordhotel.com.au Nomads Melbourne 196-198 A’Beckett Street, Melbourne, VIC 3000 Freecall: 1800 44 77 62 Ph: 03 9328 4383 bookings@nomadsmelbourne.com nomadshostels.com Funkiest backpackers in Melbourne! Back of Chapel 50 Green St, Windsor Prahran, Vic 3181 Ph: 03 9521 5338 www.backofchapel.com Nomads All Nations 2 Spencer Street, Melbourne, VIC 3000 Freecall: 1800 739 989 Phone: 03 9620 1022 info@allnations.com nomadshostels.com $5 off first night (min 3 night stay) if you mention this ad Flinders Station Hotel Backpackers 35 Elizabeth Street, Melbourne Vic 3000 Ph: 03 9620 5100 res@flindersbp.com.au www.flindersbp.com.au The Spencer Backpackers 475 Spencer Street, Melbourne Ph: (03) 9329 7755 1800 638 108 hotelspencer@hotkey.net.au www.spencerbackpackers.com.au Bring this ad for 40 min FREE internet (new guests only). Melbourne International Backpackers 450 Elizabeth Street, Melbourne Vic 3000 Ph: 03 9662 4066 res@mibp.com.au www.mibp.com.au Discovery Melbourne 167 Franklin Street, Melbourne VIC 300 Ph: 03 9329 7525. Freecall 1800 645 200 stay@discoverymelbourne.com www.discoverymelbourne.com Independent & Budget Traveler Accommodation Provider Victoria Hall Accommodation 380 Russell Street, Melbourne 3000 Ph: 03 9662 3888 www.victoriahall.com.au
St. Kilda
alice springs
Jackson Apartments 80 Ikerman St ,St Kilda Beach Ph:0433 118 334 or 0412 525 510 www.jacksonapartments.com.au Jackson.apartments@bigpond.com ST Kilda Beach House 109 Barkly Street,St Kilda,VIC,3182 Ph: 03 9525 3371 www.stkildabeachhouse.com.au Habitat HQ 333 St Kilda Road, St Kilda, VIC, 3182 Freephone 1800 202 500 info@habitathq.com.au www.habitathq.com.au Award winning 4.5 star hostel with a homely & relaxed atmosphere Specials from $20! FREE pick up from Tullamarine (min 3 nt stay) * Conditions apply
Annie’s Place 4 Traeger Avenue, Alice Springs , NT, 0871 Ph: 1800 359 089 www.anniesplace.com.au
South Australia Adelaide
Apollo Bay
Apollo Bay Backpackers Lodge 23 Pascoe Street, Apollo Bay Ph: 1800 157 280 +61 352 377850 Mob: 0413 504 402 ww.apollobaybackpackerslodge.com.au Eco Beach YHA Eco-Hostel 5 Pascoe Street, Apollo Bay 3233 Ph: (+613) 5237 7899 apollobay@yhavic.org.au www.yha.com.au Clean, quiet and relaxing Eco-Hostel. Cosy fire in winter. DVD’s available to borrow from reception.
Adelaide Travellers Inn Backpackers 220 Hutt St Adelaide 5000 Free call 1800633747 Ph: +61 08 82240753 bookings@adelaidebackpackers.com.au www.adelaidebackpackers.com.au Majestic Minima Hotel 146 Melbourne Street, North Adelaide SA 5006 Ph:(08) 8334 7766 minima@majestichotels.com.au www.majestichotels.com.au OUR HOUSE BACKPACKERS 33 Gilbert Place, Adelaide, SA, 5000 Ph: 08 8410 4788 info@ourhousebackpackers.com www.ourhousebackpackers.com Adelaide Shakespeare International 123 Waymouth Street, Adelaide SA, 5000 Ph: +61 (0)8 8231-7655 (Oz Freecall) 1800-556-889 bookings@shakeys.com.au This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it www.shakeys. com.au
Halls Gap
Grampians YHA Eco-Hostel Corner Grampians and Buckler Roads Halls Gap 3381 Ph: (+613) 5356 4544 grampians@yhavic.org.au www.yha.com.au Eco accredited. Solar powered. Herb garden, free range chooks and friendly local kangaroos
Northern Territory Darwin
Ashton lodge & Wisdom Bar 48 Mitchell St, Darwin, NT, 0800 Ph: 08 8941 4866 ashtonlodge@gmail.com www.wisdombar.com.au Melaleuca on Mitchell 52 Mitchell St, Darwin, NT, 0800 Ph: 08 8941 7900 Freecall: 1300 723 437 www.momdarwin.com info@MOMDarwin.com
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RECRUITMENT NEWS
Getting The Right Papers... BBM’s Omar Soliman takes an indepth look at some of the useful certificates and qualifications that will not only help you get a job in Australia, but will also help you stay in Australia. Next month we’ll be covering more info on the certificates and tips you’ll need to help you find work in Australia but if you can’t wait check out www.bbmlive.com. Certificates. Except the one you got for 100m breast stroke back in Year 3 you probably have not cherished one since. Yet if you want to get ahead in Australia, you have to prove your worth with the relevant paperwork. Employers want proof dammit, hard evidence to back up your claims. RSA, RCG, TEFL; note down the acronyms and pack away the right reinforced sheets of A4 paper as they might be the difference in you getting that job or your application ending on the scrap heap.
RSA Certificate Australians love a tinnie (or 15) so barmen are essential yet despite their importance they do require a certificate to serve the plenty. In this case it is known as the RSA, which stands for Responsible Service of Alcohol and is one of the easier ones to get your hands on, even taking as little as three hours. For most states you can even complete the course online from the comfort of your own home then print off the certificate at your leisure, only Victoria and Tasmania enforce face to face training with an accredited trainer. Alas, as with most things in Australia it does not come for free and prices range from $45 to $70.
RCG Certificate Where there is alcohol you will often find pokies (gambling machines) and to prove your trustworthiness around them there is a certificate required, the RCG to be precise. The qualification stands for Responsible Conduct of Gambling, which is to ensure that anyone working in and around pokies, such as hoteliers and security staff, are trained to ensure that customers gamble in a responsible manner. As with the RSA this is usually a half-day course and prices range from $65 to $85. However, deals can be had if you choose to do the RSA and RSG courses simultaneously and having both on your CV may well give you an edge in getting that dream bar / nightclub / hotel / casino job.
TEFL Certificate One favourite job amongst backpackers is, of course, Teaching English as a Foreign Language or TEFL which comes with its own certificate.
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While it is of little use in Australia itself there are locations in South East Asia that would happily take you if you can take a class under your arms and release them speaking the Queen’s best. One such location is Thailand where a high percentage of those who want to stay teach English for a living. Recently the criteria has become a little trickier with most schools now requiring a Bachelor’s degree plus a 120-hour TEFL course. You can also take your pick from countries such as Vietnam, Malaysia, China, Japan and Hong Kong. Locations to take a TEFL course are in the major cities including Sydney, Melbourne, Adelaide, Brisbane and Perth so book a weekend off and get it done. Prices range from $429 for the 20-hour entry level course and $799 for the more comprehensive 140-hours which includes 20-hours of practical training.
TAFE Certificate Hairdressing also requires a certificate, well, you wouldn’t let just anyone loose with a pair of scissors around a paying customer’s head now would you. To train you can undertake Technical and Further Education (or TAFE) in institutions that are basically the Australian equivalent of college. There are foundation courses (Certificate I and II) yet Certificate III in Hairdressing is the basic one year course and with that qualification students blossom into fully qualified hairdressers. TAFE also covers fields such as tourism, engineering and IT; areas which could eventually help you gain sponsorship.
Certificate III There are certain jobs where prior qualifications are expected and electricians must gain a Certificate III in Electrotechnology. The course provides a comprehensive teaching to ensure you do not electrocute yourself or others. By the end you will know how to install and maintain electrical components safely, circuits, transformers, wiring and what equipment to use. With that in the bag you are then eligible to apply for an Electrical License to then work as a trade qualified, licenced Electrician in your state or territory. Plumbers get everywhere; from drains to metal roofs working with heating, cooling, gas and ventilation systems and they also need a certificate to allow them to work.
Again, authorities are state-specific yet a Certificate III is the best course of action. The content is divided between lectures, workshop tutorials, online studies and onsite assessments covering a variety of modules in a chosen area of plumbing. These include water, sanitary (both are compulsory), then two from drainage, mechanical services, roofing and gas services. After successful completion of the course a four year apprenticeship follows, only then can be eligible to register as a plumber. Charpenters also follow a similar certificate laden path to registration in order to work safely. Certificate III covers the basics of wood work from measuring plans, using power tools and equipment to final construction. In this case there are 22 compulsory unit and eight elective ones. The course offers practical experience as a two-year apprenticeship yet that can only take you so far and participants can only work on dwellings up to two stories high.
Recognition Prior Learning Even if you simply want to gain a head start for a job application you can gain a qualification through Recognition Prior Learning. This becomes particularly handy if you lack a diploma in a skill that you want to see recognised. Let’s say your father has trained you how to fix a car, now you can gain a qualification in Automotive Mechanical Technology to show a prospective employer. Or maybe you are an ace at painting nails before a night out, now you could gain a Certificate II in Nail Technology to show it. Applying for jobs in Australia can be a tedious, tiresome ordeal yet if you know what you want to do then the first step to impress is to prove it. Whether it be a barman, hairdresser or Teaching English as a Foreign Language, any prospective employer wants hard evidence of your skills so take the course, highlight it in bold on your CV then slap the certificate on the desk at the interview.
By Omar Solimon
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BBM TRIVIA
Crossword A mix of popular culture, general knowledge and looking at what’s happening this January, use you’re noggin to fill in the blanks!
Across:
1. Which animal has the most teeth? (5) 3. A British yeast based condiment that can’t be replicated (7) 5. The bank Santander shares its name with a town in which country (5) 8. What is Australia’s largest inland city (7) 9. A type of marine reptile found at sea (6)
Free Prize Giveaways *To win free albums, singles, EP’s, gig tickets, travel and accommodation sign up to the BBMLive newsletter, as five lucky winners will be picked every week. To sign up visit www.bbmlive.com
Down:
2. February Festival that happens annually in Brazil (3,8) 4. Kurt Cobain, Krist Novoselic and Dave Grohl are members of which band (7) 6. What are Blue Mountain, Caturra, and Mocca types of (6) 7. A band playing at Big Day Out festival (5) 10. Which is the only US state to begin with the letter ‘P’ (12)
Answers can be found on our competitions page www.bbmlive.com/competitions.html or facebook.com/bbmmagazine
Pub Quiz Knowledge If you’re into pub quizzes then you’ll be pleased with this list of useless facts that you think you don’t need to know, as you’ll never know when that pointless bit of information you’ve retained will come in handy... A lightning bolt is actually five times hotter than the surface of the sun. The word “poecilonym” is actually the synonym to the word “synonym.” People who are sad or depressed are likely to spend more money than those who are happy. Playing video games can sharpen a person’s decision making abilities by 25% as well as improve focus and boost creativity.
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When caterpillars are placed in a circle, they will continuously follow each other around until they die. Steve Jobs’ first business was actually selling blue boxes that would allow users to get free phone service illegally. 50% of human DNA is the same as a banana’s. The word “gorilla” comes from a Greek word “gorillai” meaning “a tribe of hairy women.”
Tittybong, Bacon Bay and Milkshake Hills are all places in Australia. Music literally makes the brain happy and hungry for more music. If all the stars in the universe were divided amongst everyone on Earth, we would each own about 44.2 trillion stars. Alcohol activates and stimulates the same part of the brain associated with honesty.