Being 5
Vol 5 . No 4
Stuff that just might make your life better
better
Buy a car
without getting ripped off Top
things
Everyone should know Fit & Healthy
Body reno Finding $$ to
Own a home The ONE thing you’re missing that changes
Everything How to go from addict to amazing
After
Before Nate Loehr
You’re a loser. Chelsea Hughes
How to stop that p 12
Take this magazine with you. When you’re done, give it away.
Being
better
Being Better is created to help you achieve the life God wants for you. We hope to inspire you to seek the best life you can have, and that happens when you include God. For those who don’t know how to do that or why, we hope we can help. Ultimately, we want to help you find Jesus in a way that doesn’t freak you out. God just wants to hang out with you...(yes, you) and when you let Him, your life really will be better. “You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you, declares the LORD...” Jeremiah 29:13-14 If you want to find out more about God, you just need to start looking for Him. We’ll help. You can start at our website or one of the others listed in this issue. Also, find a great Bible-believing church in your area and go. Read the Bible.
Being Better is published four times a year. Subscribe for $6.99 per year or to buy in bulk quantities, go to our website. To contact us for any reason: Being Better Magazine 221 31st Street Sioux City, IA 51104 www.BeingBetterMagazine.com
Contents 6
Nuggets of Wisdom: You are Maahvelous .. . . . . . . . . . 4 How To: Buy a car . . . . 5 Home & Family: Finding $$ to own a home .6 The whole story ...........8 Top 5: Things everyone should know. 9 Health & Fitness: . . . . . . . . . . . . . 10 Food focus. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 11 The one thing you’re missing that changes everything. . . . . . . . . . . 12 A Better Way: To start a body reno.18
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©2015 B eing Better Magazine. Please ask publisher’s permission before using content for other public purposes. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture quotations are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2007 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.
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Cover: Nate Loehr photo © Shannon Loehr Photography
www.facebook.com/beingbetterministries
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Being Better Magazine | Vol. 5, No. 4
The Best Cookies image courtesy McDonald’s . Wall mount image courtesy Dockem
Stuff
Best Kid Question
With arms extended toward heaven the minister began, “Dear Lord, without you, we are but dust...” Before he could continue, an intense 4-year-old leaned toward his mother and loudly inquired, “What is butt dust?”
Best Book
If you’ve been wounded, and you just can’t seem to heal, How to Stop the Pain by Dr. James Richards is for you. Maybe you’ve tried to get on with your life, but you just can’t move on. This paradigm–shattering book will free you from the forces that would turn you into a victim. It will lead you step– by–step through a simple process that will free you from the pain of the past and protect you from the pain of the future.
Best Treat
Hands down the best chocolate chip cookie of all time is...drum roll...not one you’d expect because they are probably also the cheapest. Go to McDonald’s and get one─or three for like a buck! They are soft, yet a little crispy, and sometimes they’ll be warm so the chocolate’s all gooey. Yep, they’re the best!
Best Quote “Courage is discovering that you may not win, and trying when you know you can lose.” -Tom Krause
Best Funny My friend called me and asked, “What’re you doing right now?” I said, “Probably failing my driving test.”
Best Random Info
In an experiment, people injected with adrenaline found bad jokes to be much funnier.
Best Thing
Now you don’t have to hold your tablet to watch your shows, movies, and videos. This wall mount dock by Dockem (get it on Amazon) attaches with damage free 3M Command Adhesive Strips. Under $20. www.beingbettermagazine.com | Vol. 5, No. 4
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NUGGETS OF WISDOM
You are
Maahvelous!
In the early days of SNL, Billy Crystal’s Latin character, Fernando Lamas, was hilarious. Fernando told everyone,
“You look maaahvelous!” Do you think you’re marvelous? It just might make a big difference.
A
friend tells how he was doing some electrical work at his home. He knew he had shut off the power, but when he slipped and touched a bare wire he jumped, certain he had felt the twinge of being shocked. He wasn’t. He slipped again and jerked just the same. He was fine. Some psychology students performed an experiment on a friend, Tom. As each one of them ran into him on the way to class they told Tom that he looked sick even though he looked fine. After the third buddy asked him if he was well enough to be up and about, he was convinced and headed back to bed. Allowing expectations to cloud reality has been documented over and over. In a famous experiment done in the 1960s, the Pygmalion Effect was tested on 50 grade school teachers. Half of them were told that their students were underachievers from disinterested families. The other 25 teachers were told their students were high achievers with supportive families. In fact, there was no difference between the two groups. The
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only difference was the teacher’s mind set. The test scores of those labeled “underachievers” dropped 25 points. The touted “overachievers” had test scores increase by 50 points. What we perceive to be the truth can end up being our truth because we don’t live any differently than if it is the truth. But, as our examples show, perception doesn’t equal reality. Even if there are bad or hard things in our lives, it doesn’t mean there’s something irreparably wrong with us. (The stories on pg 12 prove this point.) Setting ourselves up for success means believing the best is possible─despite the critics, circumstances, or feelings. Remember, you can’t harvest what you don’t plant. Start each day striving for the best and you’re more likely to achieve it. Then, one day soon, you’ll look in the mirror and say, “You are maahvelous!” From the Bible: “My experience shows that those who plant trouble and cultivate evil will harvest the same.” Job 4:8
Being Better Magazine | Vol. 5, No. 4
TV set and Guy w/car image © Clipart.com .
How to buy a car without getting ripped off
W
e understand. Getting a new car is exciting. We get emotionally invested with our vehicles. They are an extension of us. That is exactly why we get ourselves into trouble. Our emotions end up making the deal instead of our brain. The result is we put more money than we should in the dealer’s pocket. If you’re in the market for a new ride, follow these tips to get the best deal.
1. Make dollars and sense
If you need to finance your car, start by learning what interest rate you can get on your own. Apply at your bank and get a pre-approval letter. That will give you bargaining power. Dealers do make money on securing loans for customers so they have a stake in it. This isn’t necessarily bad. Since they deal in volume, they may be able to offer a better rate. Checking options allows you to get the best rate for you.
2. Trade wisely
If you have a trade in, know how much it’s worth before you look for a new car. Get more than one opinion. You may want to sell it ahead. CarMax will buy
your car even if you don’t buy from them. You can get a price from them and a letter stating it’s good for seven days. Use that to negotiate with others.
3. Know the numbers
Do your research and determine what a fair price is for the type of vehicle you are looking for. Kelley Blue Book is a good starting point.
4. Set your limits
Figure out how much you can spend and don’t budge no matter how flashy the better model is or what “once-ina-lifetime-deal” is offered. If you can’t afford it, you can’t afford it. Remember there are taxes, licensing, and fees you’ll need to allow for.
5. Take a walk
Go in planning not to buy. Never forget that the car lot needs your business more than you need their car. There are a gazillion places to get a similar car. If it’s not coming together, walk away and give yourself time to think. Before you do anything, remember this is a business deal. Make it a good one.
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H O M E & F A M I LY
Finding $$
TO OWN A HOME Later
Now
“If you live like no one else, later you can live like no one else.” -Dave Ramsey
have to be willing to do challenging things now so you can have what you want later. But, when it’s your choice, and there’s a big reward at the end, it can be very motivating. If you look at this as a burden or too limiting, it will be a nightmare for you or you’ll give up. Attitude is everything.
H
ome ownership has always been the pinnacle of the American dream. It’s a big step but not out of reach. It’s a matter of planning and saving. But where does that savings come from when many of us live paycheck to paycheck. Here are a few ideas on where to find that money. Live like no one else This is everything in a nut shell. You
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Move to the poor house A couple in their 20s was able to save the down-payment on their house in two years by living those two years in what they loving referred to as “the outhouse.” They could have afforded twice as much rent but instead they sucked it up and socked the extra away. The upside: They had lots of interesting stories to tell. They could laugh because they knew it was temporary.
Being Better Magazine | Vol. 5, No. 4
The f ine print
Eat better A couple realized they were spending a huge amount on eating meals out. They started making meals at home and discovered they were also eating much healthier. When they wanted to go to dinner with friends they would eat a little at home, then order a smaller meal or appetizers at the restaurant to share. The upside: They could still go with friends, and on other days they made meal time special by trying new recipes, cooking together, and even playing games during meal time. Outhouse © Clipart.com . Nice house © Doremi l Shutterstock.com
Spend less, then spend less Budgeting is key to finding money to save. When a young gal figured out what she was spending a month on entertainment she challenged herself to have some left at the end of each month. She canceled cable and got on Netflix - saving half of her budget. She made a weekly menu before shopping and only bought what she needed which saved on her grocery budget. The upside: Making it a challenge was rewarding and kept her motivated. Think outside the budget Do you get a tax refund each year? Could you spend a couple of nights a week working part-time somewhere? Maybe it’s just a temporary gig during holiday season or for the summer. The upside: You’ll get to your goal faster and your TV and sofa will get less wear. Clean house Sell everything you aren’t using that’s just taking up space. Someone wants those golf clubs you only use every other year. Don’t have anything? Sell other people’s stuff. When Marla wanted to make some extra money she and her teenage daughter went to
While you’re
waiting
W
hile you’re saving for your home here are a few other things you’ll need to consider.
How much house
Figure out how much of a house payment you can afford. Lenders will often qualify you for much more than you should buy. Make sure you are considering all your expenses that come with home ownership: taxes, insurance, upkeep, appliances, lawn care, etc. Scraping by for a couple of years is one thing. Having to do it for the next 15-30 will not be fun. Goal: Create your future budget.
Give yourself credit
To get the best interest rate on your home loan, you’ll need a good credit score. Look at your credit report and start cleaning it up. Goal: Improve your credit score.
Prepare yourself
Make sure you are really ready to buy a home. You may want to wait if you plan on going back to school or changing jobs, if you’re not sure about the area or if the size of your household may be changing. Owning a home ties you down more so make sure you’re ready. Goal: Make the best decision for your (and your family’s) lifestyle. rummage sales to buy vintage clothes and name brand pieces─for dirt cheap. They resold them online for a nice profit. Tom had a pickup and offered to haul old machinery to the steel yard that paid him by the pound. The upside: You get to make money in your “free time” and with family. You have more room in your closets and you can park in your garage.
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the whole story Make sure you know
P
erception isn’t always reality. A company was experiencing some economic concerns. Employee bonuses were put on hold and other cuts were made to make ends meet. Shortly after, the company bought a corporate jet. Hmmm We can imagine the negative thoughts the employees must have had as the hair rose up on the backs of their blue collars. But wait. Before anyone starts gathering darts and printing pictures of the boss, there’s more to tell. The company did a major amount of traveling because they had plants and customers across the globe. They were spending mega millions on airfare. By buying their own plane, they were able to save millions...which allowed them to reinstate the employee bonuses. Ohhh. Similarly, God gets a lot of bad press. Something happens that we don’t like,
and we point the finger at God. I guess we forgot about the devil...and ourselves. That we’re the ones starting wars, flying off the handle, and making bad decisions─frequently. Do
we ever think that there’s more to the story than we can see? That maybe God’s got something better in the works? The Bible says God is our comforter, our healer, and that He cares for us and loves us. In fact, He loved us so much, He sacrificed His son, Jesus, to pay the price for our sins. If we believe in Jesus, guess what? We get our bonus too! That would be eternal life. Before you write God off as not to be trusted, make sure you know the whole story. You can read it in the Bible. God is for you. Jesus wants to get to know you. Jesus, who is the way to God, said, “Don’t let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God, and trust also in me.” All you need to do is have a little trust and pray. Talk to God and start a relationship so you can hear the whole story. Spoiler alert: it’s a good one.
From the Bible:
“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.” John 3:16-17
To find out more about God’s love and how Jesus saves us, read the Bible, find a local, Bible-believing Christian church, check out pgs 12-17 and our website - click Change your Life.
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Being Better Magazine | Vol. 5, No. 4
TOP
5
things everyone should know larly] [and do regu
Plane over runway © ssuaphotos l Shutterstock.com .
N
o matter who you are or where you live, there are a few things that are just important to getting by in this world. Resource links at beingbettermagazine.com under Issue Extras.
1. Bad day car basics
There will be that Monday when you run over the biggest nail ever (and it will be raining). Later, your car won’t start. Knowing how to handle these common car issues (and actually practicing) will make the inevitable experience far less annoying. Plus, you’ll feel really great when you see your coworker with a flat. Instead of (or after) pointing and laughing you can actually help him. Good resource: Someone who’s done it...or YouTube.
2.
Cash control
This is called a budget. A budget is your friend. Nearly 40% of people don’t have a budget. Number of married couples who will fight over money tonight...probably about 40%. Learn to budget and be happy. Good resource: Financial planning app Mint.com.
3. How to talk to anyone
For many, having to start, let alone, carry on a conversation with someone new is about as fun as whacking your shin on your trailer hitch. That’s why you learn. Be casual, be obser-
vant, ask open ended questions, find common ground, and have a good exit strategy. For all the details, watch a few videos and you’ll be ready to talk turkey. Good resources: YouTube: Charisma Matrix, Confident Conversations with Dr. Aziz, and How to Start a Conversation with Anyone by Peak Your Mind.
4. How to argue kindly
Being a jerk rarely gets you what you really want. Plus, well, it makes you look like a jerk. People will avoid you. Learn how to state your point calmly, clearly, and kindly. Good resource: Crucial Conversations book by Joseph Grenny
5. What the Bible says
Someone once says the Bible is Basic Information Before Leaving Earth. If you don’t think you need to read it, or if you think you know what’s in it, you haven’t really read it. Once you read it you’ll get what you’ve been missing. Good resources: Download a free bible app at www.youversion.com or to get a free bible, write to us at Being Better Ministries, 221 31st St. Sioux City, IA 51104
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H E A LT H & F I T N E S S
Laughter “Laughter is the best medicine.”
Things that are true we wouldn’t eagerly admit to “Do not machine wash or tumble dry” means I will never wash this … ever.
Body of Knowledge I can’t stand it
Standing is far more tiring than walking because the same few muscles have to do all the work.
[
What a feat
Butterflies taste with their feet. Penguins incubate eggs on top of their webbed feet. Elephants use their feet to hear via vibrations felt through their soles.
[
There’s no worse feeling than that millisecond you’re sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.
Brain Bender
Which of these statements are true?
A
Take a walk
Big foot
Feet are at their largest in the evening.
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The only time I look forward to a red light is when I’m trying to finish a text.
Answers below.
Walking is the best exercise for your feet. Walking benefits your general health by contributing to weight loss and aiding circulation.
[
I keep some people’s phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
B C D E
A. Hypothalamus regulates body temperature. B. Thyroid controls your metabolic rate. C. It takes about 24 hrs. for food to pass through your body. D. Small intestine is about 20 ft. long. E. In your life you will pee enough to fill a 12,000 gal. pool. F. The average person walks over 100,000 miles in their life.
F Being Better Magazine | Vol. 5, No. 4
Answers: All are true.
[
I hate leaving my house looking great and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.
Food focus
Our favorite.
Feet © Clipart.com . Human body wordcloud © makeitdouble | Shutterstock.com . Lombardi’s image courtesy Lombardi’s www.firstpizza.com . Argula Pizza © Denizo71 l Shutterstock.com .
Pizza became a phenomenon in the U.S. after World War II. GIs stationed in Italy fell in love with it. Pizza has been a national favorite ever since. What goes on a pizza is completely personal. Standards like cheese and pepperoni are favored by many, but rebels will try anything from jalapeños to squid. Those health minded throw on veggies and hold the cheese. No matter what goes on our crust though, we will still call it pizza.
Pizza facts
• First documented use of the word “pizza” was in AD 997 in Gaeta, Italy. • Pizza slices are a New York invention. Italian pizzas tend to be served whole or served in rectangular pieces. • The first pizza chain, Shakey’s, was founded in 1954.
Bacon, Tomato, & Arugula Pizza Serves: 6 Cal: 314 • Fat: 9 g Carbs: 50 g • Fiber: 2 g Protein: 13 g Sodium 770 mg
Lombardi’s pizzeria in Manhattan, which opened in 1905, was the first pizzeria in the United States. It is still open today. According to Guinness, the largest pizza was made on Dec. 8, 1990, in South Africa. This cheese pizza was 122 feet, 8 inches across. Ingredients:
1 lb refrigerated fresh pizza dough 5 applewood-smoked bacon slices 2 c grape tomatoes cut in half 1/2 t red pepper flakes 1 T cornmeal 1/2 c low-sodium pizza sauce 3 oz shredded partskim mozzarella cheese 1 c baby arugula 1 t extra-virgin olive oil 1/2 t white wine vinegar
Directions: Preheat oven to 450°. Lightly oil the inside of a bowl, add dough and let stand, covered, for 15 min. In a skillet, cook bacon until crisp. Crumble. Add tomatoes and pepper to pan drippings; cook 2 min. Sprinkle cornmeal on a pizza pan; add dough and press into a circle. Spread sauce, tomatoes, and bacon over crust and top with cheese. Bake 15-20 min or until crust is golden. Combine arugula with vinegar and oil and arrange on top. www.beingbettermagazine.com | Vol. 5, No. 4
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E
LIFE CHANGE The ONE thing you’re missing that changes
If your life is a mess
it’s time to clean house.
Meet Nate
Watched his dad drown. God hater. Addict. Horrible friend. Terrible son. Thief. Liar. Loser. Without purpose. Hopeless.... Well, he was. Today Nate Loehr is 20 years clean, purpose driven, happy, married, and the father of three. As the Dean of Men at one of the most successful rehab centers in the country, he can tell you what works and what doesn’t. Why you’re a loser, and how to stop being one. (See the yellow sidebars.)
MEET LEE
M People train wreck lives. They go to rehab, try harder, make promises...and fail. How do you get past addiction? How does anyone deal with the hard things in life? Here are four people who know the answer. One that will work for you too.
W
e went on a journey with four people who have tragic yet incredible stories. They share how they not only survived, but thrived. How they all found the ONE thing that was missing that changed everything. They hope their stories will let you see what the missing thing is in your story.
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y biological mom and step-dad abused me terribly before the age of three. My step-dad tied a rope around my neck and drug me behind a tractor because he got mad at me. They tied me to the bed for days on end and didn’t even feed me or let me go to the bathroom. They tied me to a cinder block out in the yard. I can remember the house we lived in. I would crawl under the porch so they couldn’t get me. Even though I was rescued, and later adopted by a loving family, the memories of this terrible beginning stayed with me even into adulthood. I dealt with the pain of my past by getting high. The higher I was the better because I didn’t think about my past. But, I would dream about someone chasing me and wake up terrified. So I did more and more drugs and tried to kill myself twice by overdosing. When I began a relationship with
Being Better Magazine | Vol. 5, No. 4
Tips from an addict Nate Loehr photo © Shannon Loehr Photography
a woman, at first, things were good. Then her verbal abuse started because she drank. Over the next decade, her drinking led to violent behavior and there were times I was lucky to be alive afterward. I stayed with her because I thought it was what I deserved. When our baby girl was born, I thought I wouldn’t be able to get custody, so I stayed to keep her safe. But things got worse. Eventually, child services came and I told them if I could keep my daughter, I would do wherever they said. I had been taking my daughter to church where my adoptive family went. The pastor told me about Teen Challenge and I said, “Sign me up!” Since I came to Teen Challenge, God just keeps opening doors for me. I was able to restore my relationship with my adoptive family. They love me and back me 100%. I feel my daughter loves me even more now, and God put a Christian man in my life to be my accountability partner. God has blessed me so much. The devil had me for 40 years, but God has the rest of my life. He changed me from head to toe. He healed my body, mind, and spirit. Since I came to Teen Challenge, I have even forgiven my birth mom, step-dad and my daughter’s mom.
MEET Angelo
I
began to do drugs and shoot cocaine in my veins. Money was running out! I had to survive. We knocked at the door. When it opened, I force my way in and my friend followed with his gun. Once a victim sees a gun, they’re not gonna struggle. We duct tape his hands behind him, then ransack the house to see what we can find. My name is Angelo, and I was always on the run, and always got what I wanted… except a real family. Growing
Nate Loehr spent years getting it wrong. Going through the program at Teen Challenge his life totally changed. Today he helps lead and direct those stuck in destructive behaviors. He has some tips for you.
Why you’re depressed.
The problem: Depression is a real thing. It’s a testimony that your heart and your mind are working. When you make bad decisions you will suffer loss. Why would you not be depressed? The fix: Do you just need to deal with something? If we numb problems with meds, drugs, or alcohol (or other bad behavior) you’ll never deal with it. Deal with it.
Why traditional rehab doesn’t work
The problem: I went through a wellknown addiction treatment center. I tried. I embraced the AA pattern. Nine months out I blew it. I became depressed. Suicidal. They medicated me. I was hopeful but it didn’t last. I wasn’t living. I was only surviving. The fix: What was missing was knowing my purpose. You have to figure out what God made you to be.
Why you don’t think rehab will work for you.
The problem: You are a loser. I was too. You’ve tried and failed already. Maybe a lot. You’re afraid you don’t have what it takes. You are 100% right. The fix: Self-help doesn’t work. God made you and he can fix you. Yeah, I know what you’re thinking. I laughed out loud when I first heard that. When I understood it, my whole life changed. Find God. See pg 17
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LIFE CHANGE Fact: Today, Teen Challenge serves men and women of all ages. Fact: Teen Challenges are not limited territorially. You can go to whichever center best fits your needs and budget. To find a center near you call 855-END-ADDICTION or www.teenchallengeusa.com Nate found help at Teen Challenge (TC) in Brookings, SD. There are over 200 TC centers across the country.
up, my mother and father didn’t want nothing to do with me. I got passed around to different family members. At one point, I lived with an alcoholic grandfather, who beat me with his belt every night. I saw people who had good families and I always desired that. I had all this anger being stored up inside of me. I lashed out at other students at school and was sent back to my father, a drug dealer. When I was 13, I started smoking and selling marijuana to get money. By the time I was 18, I was in jail on drug charges. There I met the Latin Kings gang. I’d been rejected all my life but now these guys said they’re going to love me, and I’m going to be a part of a family—the family I never had. I began fighting for this gang and ended up in solitary confinement for a year. They said they’d be there for me and make sure I had what I needed. They forgot all about me. Everything they ever talked about was a lie. It’s the same rejection I felt when I was a kid. I was angry and depressed. Once I was released I needed cash and began robbing homes. I was caught and went back to prison for eight years. My cell mate invited me to go to the prison’s chapel service. I said, “Brother, I don’t go to church. I didn’t come to pris-
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on to go to church. I came to prison to do eight years.” He said some of the Latin Kings might be there and I signed up. I went to the service but didn’t see any gang members, but I heard a message that changed my life. The preacher said that God is willing, God is there, and wants to speak to you today. I found myself in a prayer and I was saying, “God if you’re real, if this is true about you, speak to me.” When it was over, I talked to the pastor. He said, “The Lord wants me to tell you that three years ago you almost died, but he kept you alive because of his grace.” He said, “Stay in the Word [the Bible] and the Word will guide you.” There was no way he could know that I almost overdosed three years ago. I mean, this is not a coincidence. I immediately knew it was God. I knew He spoke to me and I was shaken. I went to my cell and I got on my knees—crying. I was transferred to a new prison and that’s where I discovered Teen Challenge, a Christian drug rehabilitation program. I found out that everybody that goes to Teen Challenge gets released One Teen Challenge facility reported about 70% of men come in with meds to treat mental or emotional disorders. The vast majority graduate needing no medication.
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Getting help Teen Challenge of the Dakotas image © Shannon Loehr Photography . Handcuffs image © Clipart.com .
from prison. I said, “Man, that’s the program for me.” When I got there, I heard the same message I had in the prison service. The guy begins to share how God so loved the world, even though we deserve condemnation, he didn’t come to do that. Jesus came to liberate and set us free. When he said that he didn’t come to condemn the world, right there I knew it. It was love. It was a love that the gang could not offer me. It was something deep, profound, and so I prayed and I meant business with God, “God, I’m so sorry that I rejected Your Word. I’m so sorry that I ran from you when I came into this prison. I’m so sorry! And Lord, I believe that Jesus Christ came and died on the cross. And because of that, Lord God, I accept you today as my personal savior.” I felt a weight, like chains lifting off of me that morning. This scripture became a reality in my life: “Therefore, if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature. All things are passed away, behold all things become new.” I finished the program and my prison sentence. Now, I work full time with Teen Challenge, helping others who share the same struggles I once had. One of the things I love the most of this job is to see when God takes a person that is broken and puts them back together.
Angelo found love─first with God and now with his life partner, his wife Larissa.
If you or someone you know is in trouble with addiction, Nate Loehr offers some suggestions to get help. Avoiding jail For many stuck in addiction, legal problems are inevitable. If you are facing jail time, you may be able to avoid it by opting to go through a Teen Challenge program (remember, Teen Challenge is for men and women of all ages). Just ask your lawyer about that option before you get in front of the judge. Advice for addicts Drug abuse is not an addiction. It’s a bad habit. It’s a crutch. You abuse it in order to escape reality and quit on life. The problem isn’t the drug. The problem is you. You can be fixed. Teen Challenge can show you how.
My grandfather didn’t care. My father, all he cared about was his drug business. My mother tried, but really wasn’t there for me. The gang, they gave me a false philosophy of love. But God— nothing is like God. He definitely knows how to love like a true, true Father.
MEET Chelsea
I should be dead or still in prison. Four years ago, I was so bound up in drug addiction I didn’t think there was any way to get out of it, and I had become somebody I said I would never be. In the Bible it says “The thief’s [devil’s]
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LIFE CHANGE Right: Chelsea’s mug shot after her arrest in 2011 and her today. Below: Chelsea serving at an orphanage in Mexico.
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before. The last part of that bible verse in John 10:10 says, [Jesus speaking] “My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life.” That is what I experience every day now, because of God and TC. I graduated the TC Program in 2012. My six year prison sentence was knocked down to two years of probation and my five felonies where reduced to misdemeanors. God has given me the privilege to serve at the same TC program that reached out to me. I see miracles happen every single day. I could go on and on about all God has done for me and is continuing to do for me.
Being Better Magazine | Vol. 5, No. 4
Chelsea’s “after” photo by Brittney Simpson
purpose is to steal and kill and destroy.” He almost succeeded. I had an amazing family who loved, cared and supported me, taught me right from wrong, and took me to church. I should have been the last person to go down the wrong path. Then my dad died when I was 14. I gave up on God and everyone really. I became very angry and bitter. I began making very poor choices and by my senior year in high school I was a full blown addict, addicted to pain pills and alcohol. I was doing things I never thought possible─selling my body, robbing people, stealing from my family, engaging in abusive and even homosexual relationships. I had an emptiness I couldn’t fill. Somehow I managed to graduate with a softball scholarship. In college, it didn’t take long until the life I was living came to light. One night, I got arrested with several charges against me. I was sentenced to six years in prison. After almost a year in jail, it was time to change my life. God opened doors for me to be released to Teen Challenge (TC) in Gainesboro TN. They took me in and loved me despite the mess I was. I had never experienced a love so great. I was in the right place and I wanted what they had. I began my journey and God got a hold of me and completely transformed my life. I went in bitter, angry, and hopeless but I left with joy, peace, and full of hope. I used to live my life chasing the next high, but now I live my life chasing after the Most High and I am more fulfilled now than I ever have been
Final thoughts from Nate Questions & Answers
Q
How hard was the Teen Challenge program? It was hard but I never wanted to leave. I struggled sometimes but when I started seeing that I had a real purpose in life, I was all in. What’s the best advice somebody’s given you? “Your life is a mess because you make poor decisions.” Or “You know what you’ve done is wrong so man up and repent.” The TC guys were brutally honest, but loving. They showed strength, but without violence. I hadn’t seen that. Everything worked out for you but how many addicts in TC does it really work for? We don’t change lives, Jesus does. I had to face my deepest fears of not being strong enough to create a good life myself. The Bible says, “Apart from Him [Jesus] you can do nothing.” I got to a point where that was appealing. There was freedom from trying harder. People who decide that the endless love, unconditional forgiveness, and hope that Jesus offers is something worth checking out, they will succeed. If you don’t, you won’t. From what I’ve seen, way more people walk out of here completely changed. Way more.
Q
A A
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If God is the thing missing in your life, you can get right with Him now. Here’s how...
Here’s how you can
Get right with God
First, Repent. Own your choices to sin. We
all have a sense of right from wrong, God gave us a conscience and if we are honest we know we carry a load of guilt. Guilt only Jesus can remove. Jesus wants to help you. “Then Jesus said, ‘Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.’” Matthew 11:28
Second, Ask. Ask Jesus to give you the eyes and ears you need to hear His voice. Only by the Holy Spirit can a person come alive to the voice of God. In the Bible, Jesus said that we must be “born again.” It’s a miracle, don’t try to figure it out, just ask for it!. “Jesus replied, “I tell you the truth, unless you are born again, you cannot see the Kingdom of God... For this is how God loved the world: He gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life. God sent his Son into the world not to judge the world, but to save the world through him. There is no judgment against anyone who believes in him.” John 3:3, 16-18 Third, Read the Bible. The Bible is written to believers. Let the Spirit of God speak to you. God has described Himself in the Bible as the “still, small voice.” It’s the most satisfying and peace giving voice you’ll ever hear! “ I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.” John 10:10 Here’s an idea of how to begin to talk to God: Jesus, I am sorry for all the times I’ve rebelled against what I know is right. Please forgive me. I don’t know what I need or how to do it, but I want to trust that you do. Please help me with all my fears, weaknesses, pride, and stubbornness. I want to know your voice. I commit my attention and will to you. Thank you for trying to show me that you’re on my side. Thank you for the opportunity to know your truth. In the name of Jesus. Amen! To find out more about changing your life with God, go to our website www.beingbettermagazine.com and click Change your life.
www.beingbettermagazine.com | Vol. 5, No. 4
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A Better Way
to start
T
rying to get in shape can be challenging, not to mention confusing as heck. Personal trainer and group fitness instructor, Jayson Winquist, has seen lots of mistakes, missteps, and menu massacres on
Lego your Ego Check your ego at the gym door. Too many guys think it’s all about how much you can lift. If you want to be a power-lifter this is true. If you want to be a body-builder this is completely wrong. Most people have no aspirations to do either so focusing on YOUR goals is what’s important.
Vice squad Giving up every bad vice all at once is a bad idea. Excessive changes to your diet and/or exercise habits will sabotage you faster than anything. If you eat ice cream every day and just go cold turkey your odds of failure are huge. If you go from couch potato to two hour workouts you’re body will not be your friend. Start slow and work up.
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the road to body renovation. Here are his tips to achieving the results you want without feeling discouraged, deprived, or doing things you’re going to regret. Use these tips to create a plan that will work for you.
Get personal Why are you doing this? Is it to lose a few pounds or a lot of weight? Maybe you need to be able to lift a certain amount for your job. Do you just want to tone up? Setting goals is key so you know how much time you’ll need to commit, how strict your diet needs to be, and what types of exercises you’ll need to do.
Eat smart Use common sense. Everyone knows junk food and fast foods are bad. You know fruits and vegetables are good. Start eating less of the bad and eat more of the good. Look at the food pyramid and learn what you should be eating and start moving toward a more healthy diet.
Being Better Magazine | Vol. 5, No. 4
in shape arenovated body reno fit Water
All images © Clipart.com .
Drink water. Your muscles are 75% water and need it more than anything else. Water keeps things moving, your skin looking younger, and helps prevent sore muscles.
Structure Plan meals when possible. If most of your days are structured it’s easy to plug in healthy eating into your routine. Eat with your family at night but watch your portions and try new [healthier] recipes. Give yourself a break on the weekends but be mindful of your longterm goals. The more often you eat well, will motivate your “off” days so you don’t completely blow your progress.
Supplements The average person doesn’t get the best nutrition they could so a good multi-vitamin doesn’t hurt. Omega 3s can be another item you might be missing, so fish oil can be good. Other than that, supplements are a good way to waste money. Until you have an established routine and definite goals, you’ll have better results by developing a good diet and exercise program.
Quick tips If someone at the gym has a body like the one you’d like to have, ask about their routine. Bad form will wreck you fast. Make sure you know how to do exercises before you start. Check out workout videos or ask a trainer. To achieve toned, strong muscles your workout should be an equal focus on a strength component (building muscle) and a cardio component (burning calories). Don’t focus on one thing (like building big arms). Everything is connected. Total body fitness is key. Having a work out buddy is huge. Studies show that people will work out longer, harder, and more often when they’re not alone. People do better together. People hold you accountable.
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