Coping with Grief

Coping with Grief

Every person feels differently when a loved one dies. There is no right or wrong way to feel after the death of a loved one. Some will prefer to deal with their feelings on their own, whilst others seek support from friends, a person or a group of people who have had similar experiences of grief. They may prefer to contact a person with professional training such as a counsellor or a psychologist. What is important is that there is support available and it is normal to need support in coming to terms with your loss.

Emotional feelings following bereavement

• Guilt and regret – regret that you may not have said or done everything you wanted to say or do, especially if the death was sudden and unexpected • Injustice – Why did they have to die? Why did this have to happen to me? • Envy – others may have what you no longer have since losing your loved one • Anger – that they couldn’t be cured, that others survived, angry with your loved one that they died and now you are suffering • Loneliness – you may feel no-one understands • Depression – a natural part of the mourning process.

The feeling that there is no point in going on: losing interest in life • Relief – that your loved one is no longer suffering

Physical effects of bereavement

• Sleep disruption – can’t get to sleep or can’t stay asleep, waking early • Loss of appetite – you may not feel like eating, or feel sick when you do • Exhaustion – if you aren’t sleeping or eating well you will feel tired and worn out • Restlessness – you may find it hard to concentrate or relax • Anxiety and panic – with these unfamiliar feelings you may become anxious and panicky • Inability to cope – everyday things such as cooking, shopping or work may be difficult to cope with • Loss of interest – things that were once pleasurable may now feel meaningless • Irritability – you may find yourself ‘snapping’ with others • Tearfulness – you may cry a lot, but crying can help

Who can help

The Bereavement Service at North Cumbria Integrated Care NHS Foundation Trust is available to give support and guidance.

• Cumberland Infirmary Carlisle, 01228 616878 • West Cumberland Hospital, 01946 523309

Here are some more organisations that may be able to help.

Age UK: Carlisle and Eden 01228 536673

admin@ageukcarlisleandeden.org.uk www.ageuk.org.uk

Child bereavement UK 0800 028 8840

support@childbereavementuk.org www.childbereavementuk.org

CRUSE Bereavement Care Cumbria 0300 600 3434

cumbria@cruse.org.uk www.crusecumbria.org.uk

Eden Valley Hospice 01228 810801

www.edenvalleyhospice.org

Hospice at Home West Cumbria 01900 705200

www.hospiceathomewestcumbria.org.uk

Samaritans 116 123

www.samaritans.org

SANDS Support for anyone affected by the death of a baby 0808 164 3332

www.sands.org.uk

Reference: North Cumbria Integrated Care Bereavement Booklet Review Date: March 2023 Publication Date: March 2021

The Hospital would like to thank RNS Publications for publishing this information and the following pages contain some features from local services o ering their help at this time.

Whilst the Hospital is grateful of their support it does not endorse or recommend any of the services that they provide.

Here for you

A bereavement is never easy to bear. Our caring and professional teams are here to help guide and advise you in your time of need. From Carlisle to Kendal, Brampton to Workington, we’ll be right by you. Just as we have been for generations.

Barrow Funeralcare Cumbria House, 103-105 Roose Road, LA13 9RJ 01229 820 517 Etterby Street Funeralcare 8 Etterby Street, Stanwix, CA3 9JB 01228 521 307 Haltwhistle Funeralcare Park View, West Gate, NE49 9AQ 01434 321 755 Brampton Funeralcare Craw Hall, Murray Croft, CA8 1TR 016977 3082 Kendal Funeralcare Aynam Lodge, Bridge Street, LA9 7DD 01539 739 099

Whitehaven Funeralcare 2 Lowther Street, CA28 7AL 01946 592 268 Spencer Street Funeralcare 32 Spencer Street, Carlisle, CA1 1BA 01228 523 467 Maryport Funeralcare 91a Crosby Street, CA15 6BP 01900 818 100 Ulverston Funeralcare Higgin House, Cavendish Street, LA12 7AD 01229 582 167 Workington Funeralcare 49 Oxford Street, CA14 2AL 01900 603 873

www.coop.co.uk/funeralcare

Co-op Funeralcare is a trading name of Funeral Services Limited, a registered society registered in England DQG:DOHVZLWKUHJLVWUDWLRQQXPEHU5DQGUHJLVWHUHGRIƓFHDW$QJHO6TXDUH0DQFKHVWHU0$* 9$7UHJLVWHUHG3DUWRI&RRSHUDWLYH*URXS/LPLWHG