NY man looking for drugs calls “Crime Stoppers” BLITZ News Shorts Hollywood Profile/Movie Review Music: Suicidal Tendencies Stars News SMU / UNT Preview Cowboys Preview COVER STORY: Good Spirits! The Perfect Cocktail Party The Spirit World No More Hangovers BLITZ BABE: Heather Blitz Toys Mavs News How A Vacation Can Change Your Life Blitz Food: Afrah Crossword / Jokes / Horrorscopes Last Call: Mustache Peteys
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PUBLISHER Kelly G. Reed EDITOR Jeff Putnam
A New York man looking to buy drugs misdialed and got the sheriff’s “Crime Stoppers” line instead. Erie County Sheriff’s Detective Alan Rozansky said he got a call around noon on Monday and answered with his usual “Crime Stoppers.” The caller apparently didn’t hear that and told Rozansky he was looking “to score” drugs. Rozansky told WIVB-TV that he was surprised, but played along and arranged a meeting with undercover officers. The officers didn’t arrest the caller but used him as an informant to lead them to another transaction taking place down the road. There police arrested a 35-year-old woman trying to sell her prescription painkillers to a Buffalo man. The careless caller is off the hook for now.
CREATIVE DIRECTOR / WEBSITE / GRAPHIC DESIGN Damien William Mayfield COVER Cover Photography: Darryl Briggs Model: Tawnya Noel Cover Design: Damien William Mayfield STAFF PHOTOGRAPHERS Darryl Briggs, Gregg Case, Nathaniel Chadwick, Steven Hendrix, Matt Pearce, Jason Ryan, Ed Westerman CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS Keith Allison, Ayad El-Horr, Manny Flores, Ingemar Hudspeth, Steven G. Johnson, Joe Lorenzini, Chuck Majors, Tyler Roberts, CJ Stumpf, Rick A., Beeflower STAFF WRITERS Tony Barone, Geoff Case, Sam Chase, Vivian Fullerlove, Robin George, Frank LaCosta, Pat Moran, Richard S. Pollak and Jesse Whitman CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Joe Avezzano, Brian Beard, Jay Betsill, A. Faulkner, Dennis Hambright, Andrew J. Hewett, Jack L. Pier, H. Todd J. Moore, Jeremy Shorr CONTACT US MAIN NUMBER 214-529-7370 FAX NUMBER 972-960-8618 kreed@blitzweekly.com BLITZ Weekly P.O. Box 295293, Lewisville, TX 75029
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Photos Courtesy: Cato Institute
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VOL. 3 - ISSUE 12
November 17 - 23, 2010 3
QUOTE OF THE WEEK “Even a band of angels can turn ugly and start looting if enough angels are unemployed and hanging around the Pearly Gates convinced that all the succubi own all the liquor stores in Heaven.” – P.J. O’Rourke
Woman harassed drivers by repeatedly braking
Authorities accused a New Jersey woman of harassing drivers on the Garden State Parkway by braking repeatedly, causing other motorists to tailgate. Karen Born, 52, was free on $27,500 bail, charged with harassment, falsely incriminating others and filing false reports to law enforcement. State Police Sgt. Brian Polite told the Asbury Park Press that state troopers issued a warrant for Born’s arrest after 22 incidents of alleged harassment over the summer. Polite said Born would call police after the other driver pulled over and claim the other driver was harassing and stalking her. It was not clear whether Born had retained an attorney.
Andrew J. Hewett
www.chewednews.com
ALCOHOL: COWARDS’ ADRENALINE
The Associated Press, Nov. 9, 2010, told of a party gone bad in Douglasville, Ga., when a female guest hit a male guest, who refused to hit her back...because he refused to hit a woman. Instead, to maintain his masculinity, this Sir Lancelot swore to hit the next male who entered the party. And he did! Unfortunately, three other male guests joined him. When the dust cleared Quantez Devonta Mallory, 18; Horace Damon Coleman, 19; Emanuel Benjamin Boykins, 18; and Tracen Lamar Franklin, 19, were all charged with the murder of Bobby Tillman, 18.
Oregon couple awaken, find naked man in closet
A Corvallis couple woke Monday to find a naked stranger in their closet. Police said 21-year-old Nicholas Buekea snuck out of a friend’s basement apartment, climbed around a locked door to access a staircase and made his way to a third-floor apartment. The Gazette Times reported the apartment’s residents – who were not identified – found items out of place on Monday morning and Buekea, naked, inside their closet. Buekea struggled with one of the apartment’s residents and fled. Police said a group of people found Buekea on Monday and gave him a pair of shorts. When Buekea was found by police he was taken to a local hospital, where he is being evaluated. The Benton County District Attorney’s Office is reviewing potential charges against him.
BY COURT DATE HE’LL AFFORD A SMARTER/ BETTER/RICHER LAWYER
On Nov. 11, 2010, The Dallas Morning News reported police had arrested a violent felon, Moses Emmanuel Coppin, age 29, who had been convicted of indecency with a child and sexual assault of a child back in 2003. In 2008 he was arrested on a felony weapons charge, and in 2009 he was charged with felony aggravated assault with a deadly weapon. Before his next arrest, however, Coppin “insured” his freedom by forcing his way into the home of Alicia Madrigal, 42, and stealing her safe… Which according to police records contained “thousands of dollars in jewelry, a platinum Rolex watch, a silver Cartier, a pearl necklace and diamond rings.” Therefore, felon Moses Emmanuel Coppin had no problem posting his bond, set at $300,000.
blitzweekly.com
4 November 17 - 23, 2010
HOLLYWOOD PROFILE with Russell Crowe
by Vivian Fullerlove “Entertainment’s Real Critic”
Russell Crowe is one of the most versatile actors in Hollywood today. I love watching him make these huge character transitions between films. From a master and commander to an insanely brilliant college professor, the range of his portrayals on the big screen would seem to be unlimited. Last summer, he thrilled us as Robin Hood in Tony Scott’s epic action-adventure movie, and this week he returns to theaters as a husband and father willing to do anything to save the woman he loves in the Paul Haggis drama The Next Three Days. I sat down with the Academy Award-winner, who talked about the film and working with an amazing ensemble cast.
Tell us about the movie.
It’s the story of a young lady who gets accused of something she hasn’t done. She’s tried and convicted for that crime. The crime is murder, and the sentence is life, and throughout her husband doesn’t believe that she is capable of that. He really has to face the reality of what they’re going to go through from then on. They’ve reached the end of the appeals process, so either he accepts that this is his life and her life for now, or he tries to do something about it. He has exhausted all legal possibilities, and the illegal ones are the only ones left to him.
And you play the husband. What’s he like?
A very simple bloke. He’s an English teacher at a community college and this situation has come crashing into the relatively placid life that the two of them were living togeth-
er with their young child. He doesn’t have the resources to be in this sort of situation, and doesn’t have the financial resources to pursue a case for over three years, so this is a large turn of events. It really is the measure of their love that fuels the story from there on.
What attracted you to this project?
It’s an extraordinary situation – a marriage under a great deal of pressure. The main thing for me, though, when I read the script – the main thing I responded to – was the simple adventure of it. You know, there was undying love and a man who would do anything for his wife, and this conundrum: to achieve what he achieves he has to turn into someone that his wife can love. So that to me was an interesting journey to be on.
You have some really terrific costars in this movie. Who were some of your favorites to work with?
Brian Dennehy plays my father, and we’ve got a number of cool little turns from various people. Liam Neeson plays a man who has escaped prison a lot, and Daniel Stern plays my attorney; so that was a fun thing for me. Every week or so someone new came along, and I got to do a scene with someone I respected and whose work I enjoyed. You can check out Crowe and company this week when The Next Three Days opens in theaters nationwide. The film is rated PG13 for violence, drug material, language and some sexuality.
by A. Faulkner
The Girl Who Kicked The Hornet’s Nest
Final installments of great trilogies tend to disappoint (Godfather III, anyone?). This is not the case with The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet’s Nest, the third and final film of the Millennium Trilogy by the late Stieg Larsson dealing with the brutal victimization of his great female protagonist, Lisbeth Salander. Moving seamlessly between flashbacks of the first two films (The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, The Girl Who Played with Fire), director Daniel Alfredson’s visualization of Larsson’s passion play portrays seasoned deceivers and their numerous unnerving acts of evil with precision and clarity while never losing sight of the one person set to bring down this evil empire—Lisbeth. After being institutionalized in her youth for setting her abusive father on fire, Lisbeth spends the rest of her life paying for this retaliation against the man who abused her family and left her mother with severe brain damage. The father, Alexander Zalachenko (a scarily good Georgi Staykov), turns out to be a Soviet spy and sex-trafficker turned Nordic-Nazi with bigger ties to true monsters responsible for incredible acts of violence, terror and government control. While the stories may seem to reach too far, Larsson knows what he is talking about. Taking cues from his own world of left-wing, anti-Nazi journalism, the Millennium Trilogy uncovers the same conspiracy theories and deep-cover governmental evil related to journalistic realities in a seemingly neutral Sweden. Beginning where The Girl Who Played with Fire left off, Lisbeth has literally come back from her grave to put an end to her father by trial after the ax to his head failed to accomplish that result. Played by Noomi Rapace, Lisbeth is a heroically damaged yet resilient hacker turned heroine. Despite her tiny frame, she is nearly a superhero— surviving torture by government-appointed
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doctors, rape by appointed guardians, brutality, a shot in the head by her father! Quite literally she is the life of a movie convoluted with conspiracy theories so deep it’s easy to question how much more the audience can take before Lisbeth finds justice. Lisbeth works much like the brilliantly dark, resourceful and intriguing powerhouse leads who fit the female molds in a Quentin Tarantino film (easily making the girls from Death Proof look like sissies). Lisbeth gets far less action in the finale than fans will want, though she does make quite an appearance in her courtroom getups, letting her bisexual-Goth-punk-freak flag fly in the form of a very Edward Scissorhands aesthetic. Back to save the day is Mikael Blomkvist, a believable Michael Nyqvist, the Millennium journalist whom Lisbeth saved in the first installment, seduced and in whom she at last has found a true friend. Supplementing the strong female presence in the series is the return of Mikael’s editor and sometime lover, Erika Berger (the wonderful Lena Endre). It is she who must make the tough decisions when faced with terror spilling from the courtroom to the Millennium offices as Mikael works desperately to uncover the many lies that have victimized Lisbeth for so long in order to give her freedom. While all the loose ends are tied up nicely in The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet’s Nest, it’s a must to watch the first two films; the plot may seem slow and thick unless you’ve waited as long as Lisbeth has for justice. America is finally getting in on the action, with David Fincher (The Social Network) slated to direct the first film in the series with Daniel Craig as Mikael and Rooney Mara as Lisbeth, but don’t wait for the translation. This is a series worth your time now.
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November 17 - 23, 2010 5 “An Ear for Music”
5. Suicide’s an Alternative/ You’ll be Sorry
Thur 11/18
keep bugging” him. Then one day his mom comes into his room and calls his name, but he’s so deep in thought he doesn’t hear her. When she finally gets his attention, she accuses him of being on drugs because “Normal people don’t act that way!” He tells her he’s not on drugs and asks her to get him a Pepsi. But she won’t give it to him. Just one Pepsi, but she won’t give it to him. Later, both parents come in, pull up a chair and sit down. They say they’ve been thinking and they’re afraid he’s going to hurt somebody, and they’re afraid he’s going to hurt himself. They conclude that it would be in his best interest to put him somewhere where he can get the help he needs. He reacts by saying, “Wait, what are you talking about, we decided? My best interest? How do you know what my best interest is? What are you trying to say? I’m crazy? When I went to your schools, I went to your churches, I went to your institutional learning facilities?” You can’t help but feel for the poor kid. He just needed some time to figure things out for himself. In 1983 I was only three years out of high school, so I could really relate. Now, as a parent myself, I get a different perspective on the song and I’ve tried to learn from it. I try not to jump to conclusions when my teenagers are moody. Instead, I let them know I love them, give them some room to breathe… and I get ’em a Pepsi.
The Art of Rebellion, 1993
Free Your Soul and Save My Mind, 2000
Suicidal Tendencies, 1983
6. I Shot the Devil
Suicidal Tendencies, 1983
7. Memories of Tomorrow
Suicidal Tendencies, 1983
8. I Want More
Suicidal Tendencies, 1983
9. Possessed
Suicidal Tendencies, 1983
Diamonds Are Forever Silver City Club – Dallas The club is celebrating their 10th Anniversary in grand style. They’re pulling out all the stops by bringing in special guest Frank Cullotta, crooner Ricki Derek, a Vegas-style buffet and casino games. Oh, and they will have entertainment that guys will enjoy!
Fri 11/19
Chris Hardwick Improv – Addison Back in the 90s he was the co-host of the MTV show Singled Out. Since then he has been in a few films and has a popular podcast, The Nerdist. He’s bringing his humor and wit to the Metroplex. Get hammered before going!
Sat 11/20
Suicidal Tendencies, 1983
3. Asleep at the Wheel
Hayes Carll Billy Bob’s Texas – Ft. Worth The singer-songwriter from The Woodlands is in town. You’ll enjoy “She Left Me for Jesus” and his other songs while he strums his guitar. Check out his album Trouble in Mind to get a feel for his music.
Sun 11/21
Sarah Jaffe, New Roman Times Dan’s Silver Leaf – Denton You’ve read about her in the Blitz Weekly and now you can see her perform. The Dallas native has a nice blend of indie rock, folk and pop. She’s making a name for herself and is well worth your time.
Mon 11/22
2. Subliminal
California Dreamin’ Samuel Lynne Galleries – Dallas Take in some art by viewing JD Miller’s latest exhibition. His 3-D work is becoming increasingly popular and Miller often works out of his studio in Dallas. His paintings and photos are inspired by his travels to California.
Tue 11/23
Suicidal Tendencies, 1983
4. Pop Songs
The Dog Problem Undermain Theatre – Dallas A funny new play by David Rabe that focuses on the friendship of Ronnie and Ray. All is well until a woman, a dog and a pair of mobsters come between them. Directed by Katherine Owens.
Some songs can easily cross from one genre to another, or somehow fall in between. Some songs, like Patsy Cline’s “Crazy,” transcend into something unique. I don’t consider it country. I don’t consider it pop. I just consider it special. I was reminded of another such song when I heard that the legendary thrash metal band Suicidal Tendencies was playing at the Palladium Ballroom on November 6th. I bought their eponymous debut album – yes, a 12” vinyl LP – in 1983 because of a song I heard on the radio: “Institutionalized.” What stood out was the autobiographical aspect of the song: the story sounding like it could have happened to any teenager. The fact that I wasn’t a real head-banger, and the chorus had the fastest tempo I’d ever heard, didn’t seem to matter. There was real drama there, not to mention some talented musicianship to pull it off. I must admit, I prefer the studio version over the live version… maybe because it’s hard to picture this 200 pound, 40something, biker-looking guy as a kid having problems. The song starts out with “Sometimes I try to do things but it just doesn’t work out the way I want it to, and I get real frustrated…” It then describes conversations he’s had with his parents, as he spends a lot of time trying to figure things out. They just want to help, and encourage him to open up and talk about it, but he can’t. He’s got to figure things out for himself, but they “just
Wed 11/17
MUSIC: Suicidal Tendencies 1. Institutionalized
Nitzer Ebb Granada Theater – Dallas So what if the band’s name doesn’t mean anything in English or German. Get back to your 80s days with another “reunion” show. They had several hits back in the day. Their EBM influence and 14 albums will make you move your hips. If you know of a cool event or concert coming up, send some info our way at editor@blitzweekly.com
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by Jack L. Pier
blitzweekly.com
6 November 17 - 23, 2010
STARS News
by Tony Barone
“The Senior Sports Authority”
Reeling Against Division Foes The Dallas Stars are struggling against Pacific Division teams this season. Last week they were defeated on the road by the L.A. Kings and then lost to the Anaheim Ducks the following night. That leaves them in last place in the division with an 87 record after starting the season 4-0. Justin Williams scored the tiebreaking power-play goal with 13:09 to play, Jonathan Quick made 27 saves and the L.A. Kings matched the best home start in franchise history with a 3-1 victory over the Dallas Stars on Thursday night. Jack Johnson had a goal and an assist, and Captain Dustin Brown also scored for the Kings, who improved to 7-0-0 at Staples Center after this fight-filled win over the Stars. Dallas’s Adam Burish sent Kings Defenseman Drew Doughty face-first into the boards with four minutes left in the game, earning a game misconduct and a major penalty for boarding that led to Johnson’s first goal of the season during the power play with 2:48 to play. “It’s crushing. I feel terrible about that,” Burish said. “I wasn’t trying to hurt the guy. I was just trying to get body position on him. It was one of those in-between plays where he was trying to turn away from the puck in the corner, and I was just trying to get some body position, and he fell. Obviously he came back and was OK. What hurts me is the spot I put our guys in.” On Friday night, Ryan Getzlaf got the go-ahead goal early in the third period, Saku Koivu scored his fifth in five games, and the resurgent Anaheim Ducks extended their winning streak to six with a 4-2 victory over the Stars. “We gutted it out and we got better as the game went along,” Dallas coach Marc Crawford said. “Unfortunately, we made a couple of miscues. But I don’t even want to call them miscues. One guy lost his stick on a penalty kill, and that’s what gave (Ryan) that great scoring chance.” The Stars are 1-4 against division opponents so far this season, losing twice to L.A. and Anaheim. Stars coach Marc Crawford was asked about the importance of division play with a reduced head-tohead schedule this season. “I think it’s still very important,” Crawford said. “The best way to get into the playoffs is to win your division, and I do believe the rivalries create competition. When you play these teams six times a year, there is going to be a little extra on the line in these games.”
“It’s an interesting mix, because it’s not like it was when you played eight times, but it’s still important,” Stars captain Brenden Morrow said. “You want to make the playoffs any way you can, and that means that every game is important. But if you can win the division, that’s a pretty big deal, too.” Last season, Dallas went 4-1-1 against the Ducks, 4-2-0 against San Jose, 2-3-1 against Phoenix and 1-2-3 against LA. That meant it had a very solid 11-8-5 record against division rivals. Its biggest problem was a 7-9-2 record against Eastern teams, and that was probably the reason for falling
seven points shy of a playoff spot. So far this season the Stars have played well against Eastern Conference teams but have fallen well short against Western Conference teams. The Stars get a chance to improve their Western Conference record at home this week when they entertain division foes the Anaheim Ducks and San Jose Sharks, followed by the Colorado Avalanche. It will be interesting to see which Stars team shows up for these games, the team that went 5-1 and scored 26 goals against teams in the Eastern Conference, or the team that is 3-6 with only 20 goals against Western Conference foes.
Upcoming Schedule: 11/18 vs San Jose Sharks – 7:30 11/20 vs Colorado Avalanche – 7:00 11/22 @ Toronto Maple Leafs – 6:00 11/24 @ Ottawa Senators – 6:30
November 17 - 23, 2010 7 blitzweekly.com
Crossword Solution by Frank LaCosta - “College Football Fanatic”
Marshall vs. SMU Sat. Nov. 20 – 2PM – Gerald Ford Stadium The Mustangs are coming off a bye week as they prepare to host the Thundering Herd. SMU controls its own destiny for the remainder of the season. By winning out, they will top the West Division in Conference USA and play in the conference title game. If the Mustangs win on Saturday they will become bowl-eligible. This will be the first time for them to go bowling in back-to-back seasons since the early 80s. The Mustangs (5-5, 4-2 C-USA) will have to push themselves in order to succeed. The Thundering Herd have had a tumultuous season. They opened the season with three losses before eking out a one-point victory over the Ohio Bobcats. Marshall lost another three in a row before creating their own current three-game winning streak. Marshall (4-6, 3-3 C-USA) has to win out in order to play in the postseason. The Thundering Herd are led by senior QB Brian Anderson. He has a strong arm and is an accurate passer. With each win his QB rating has also gone up and he’s coming in quite confident. The running game is weak, as neither Martin Ward nor Andre Booker have more than a rushing TD on the ground this season. To top it off, they aren’t reliable out of the backfield on passing downs. WR Aaron Dobson is a beast and can go the distance. by Frank LaCosta - “College Football Fanatic”
NBA: Bulls vs Mavericks
Fri. Nov. 19 – 8:30PM – American Airlines Center – ESPN The revamped Bulls come to Dallas in the middle of their brutal seven-game road trip. See how Carlos Boozer, Derrick Rose and Joakim Noah fare against Dirk and Company. The Bulls have been on a bit of a winning streak. So have the Mavs!
College Football: (9) Nebraska vs. (18)Texas A&M
Sat. Nov. 20 – 7PM – Kyle Field – ABC Nebraska owns the series record (10-3) however A&M won the last time they met. That was back in 2007. A&M needs to win this game to keep their dream of winning the Big 12 South alive this season. Nebraska has pretty much wrapped up the North. The Cornhuskers will have their hands full as the Aggies can put up lots of points in a hurry.
NFL: Raiders vs. Steelers
Photos Courtesy: Darryl Briggs, Joe Lorenzini
UNT vs. LA-Monroe
Sat. Nov. 20 – 2:30PM – Malone Stadium UNT won this past Saturday in a game in which they never trailed. QB Riley Dodge got things rolling with a 30-yard TD pass to Jamaal Jackson. Lance Dunbar scored on a 3-yard run and from there everything hinged on the kicking game. K Zach Olen hit 53, 24 and 38 yard field goals to seal the 23-17 victory over the Middle Tennessee Blue Raiders. Riley Dodge threw for 167 yards and a TD. Lance Dunbar was a machine toting the rock 36 times for 226 yards and a TD. He had a 65-yard dash in the game. He once again led the team in receiving yards with 46. This week the Mean Green (3-7, 3-4 Sun Belt) are on the road as they take on the Louisiana-Monroe Warhawks. The Warhawks (4-6, 3-3 Sun Belt) are still striving for a bowl game despite losing last Saturday 51-0 to LSU and losing in overtime to Florida International the week prior. Senior QB Kolton Browning is a bit of a dual threat and will give the Mean Green some fits. He leads the team in rushing, however their main back is Frank Goodin. His long for the year is a 15-yard burst. Goodin will catch two or three passes each game. WR Luther Ambrose is a favorite of Browning and leads the team in all receiving categories.
Sun. Nov. 21 – Noon – Heinz Field – CBS It’s the battle of the NFL’s “Bad Boys.” The Raiders come in on a three-game win streak and new life. Campbell is the journeyman who guides the offense while McFadden and Jacoby Ford provide the spark. Big Ben still has Mike Wallace, Hines Ward and Heath Miller. The Steel Curtain will be in effect. Wearing black never felt so good!
NASCAR: Ford 400
Sun. Nov. 21 – Noon – Homestead-Miami Speedway – ESPN The last NASCAR race of the year is upon us. The Sprint Cup series culminates with the Ford 400. The 1.5-mile oval track will be the center of attention. The track itself has two long straightaways with palm trees lining the backstretch. There are two lakes and a winding road-course in the middle. Will Jimmie Johnson be dethroned? Will Denny Hamlin hold on for the championship?
6-
blitzweekly.com
8 November 17 - 23, 2010
BACK TO BASICS
by Joe Avezzano
GIANTS LOSE POWER, COWBOYS COME ON
by Jay Betsill
“The Coach”
Jason Garrett became the seventh head coach of the Dallas Cowboys last week and promptly put his stamp on the team. As a change the Cowboys were asked to get to work early, work (not goof off) while they are there, wear pads for practice, hustle from spot to spot on the practice field, appear professional when representing the team and play hard during 60 minutes of football. What an amazing concept! I’m being sarcastic because it’s unreal to think a team should get credit for doing these things. And it comes as no surprise that Jason, who understands football culture as well as anyone, saw that the way to success for this organization was to go back to the basics. The 33-20 victory over the Giants was a role reversal as the Giants found ways to lose the game and the Cowboys did what they had to do to win it. The Giants turned the ball over three times, the Cowboys once – erasing the advantage the Giants had in most statistics. Big plays on offense by Kitna, Austin, Bryant, Jones and big plays on defense by McCann (a record setting 101-yard interception return) when the Giants looked like they were going to take the lead – and by Ball to seal the game – rendered meaningless the chunks of yardage the Giants were gaining before they self-destructed with a penalty that erased a TD. (Sound familiar?) The kicking game again was leaking oil. Buehler has lost his punch on kickoffs and even kicked one out of bounds. He missed again on a game-sealing field goal and had an extra point blocked. Now the challenge is for the team to get ready for Detroit – not a good team but one that has improved and is competitive. An NFL team can be different one week to the next. The Cowboys can’t afford to slip up against the Lions at home or they risk negating the lift they got from beating the Giants. It’s time to show the home folks that their efforts can be consistent and the basics pay off. Jason has made some changes that are fundamental to success and winning, and maybe now the players believe that too.
“Man On the Inside”
The Dallas Cowboys (2-7) came out on fire and overshadowed a crazy game that featured two power outages in the new $1.6 billion New Meadowlands Stadium, one that left some 81,000 New York Giants (6-3) fans in total darkness. But when all was said and done and the power came back on, the scoreboard had the Cowboys winning 33-20. “I thought the intensity was there in all three areas,” Cowboys interim coach Jason Garrett said, following the game. Garrett was the fourth Cowboys coach to win his debut, joining the likes of Barry Switzer, Chan Gailey and Wade Phillips. Jon Kitna passed for 327 yards and three touchdowns as Dallas gained 427 yards against the NFL’s top-ranked defense. Dez Bryant had five catches for 104 yards for the first 100-yard game in his young career. The Cowboys defense also stepped up, forcing three turnovers, including rookie cornerback Bryan McCann’s team-record 101-yard interception return for a touchdown, to avoid its first six-game losing streak in close to a decade. “The timing is more important than what it means specifically to the future,” Cowboys owner Jerry Jones said. “It’s a good time to have a good feeling, we needed it. The players needed it and our fans needed it most of all.” Next up the Cowboys will host the Detroit Lions (2-7) at Cowboys Stadium. Detroit is coming off an embarrassing 14-12 loss to the Buffalo Bills. While it was the Bills first victory of the season, Detroit lost its 25th straight road game to break the record the Lions set from 2001-03. The Lions were penalized 11 times for 60 yards and punted eight times. When kicker Dave Rayner (filling in for the injured Jason Hanson) missed a 49-yard field goal at the beginning of the fourth quarter, it would prove to be a fatal blow. “All this killing ourselves and making mistakes, it’s almost juvenile,” receiver Nate Burleson said. “The mistakes are killing us!” In what will be a battle of 2-7 teams, Dallas will have to maintain the intensity they showed against the Giants. Jason Garrett has worked hard to change the culture around Valley Ranch in a matter of days. A win over the lowly Detroit Lions is vital for this transforming edition of the Dallas Cowboys.
November 17 - 23, 2010 9 blitzweekly.com
by H. Todd J. Moore
A cocktail party is a leisure gathering at which food and mixed alcoholic beverages are served. If you are going to host one, there are some things you need to do in preparation. You’ll need to do some research, but rest assured, I will get you pointed in the right direction. Why are you having the party? Is it a celebration? Is it seasonal? This will determine everything else. If it’s a holiday party, you will have some definite direction on what sort of décor, hors d’oeuvres, and cocktails you will want to prepare. Remember to strive for guest enjoyment. The décor should clearly communicate the party’s purpose, but it should never be obtrusive or garish. For a holiday party, perhaps you’ll choose small wreaths, dreidels, or Kwanzaa colors and a Unity Cup. Let this attention to detail be discovered gradually as the evening unfolds. Is the party at mealtime, or after? If it’s a meal-party, you will want to prepare hearty, elegant dishes. If it’s after dinner, prepare hors d’oeuvres. Small tables or stands will be needed for plates and drinks. The occasion and the guest list will determine whether you use disposable plates and cups or finer ware. Cocktails? You should have all of the drinks prepared ahead of time (traditional mint-juleps, or a punch drink), have a bartender, or have a combination of prepared drinks and a bartender. The combination is best. You should also have a selection of good beer, chilled, in the refrigerator. If you’re preparing drinks ahead of time, I recommend punch. An American favorite is Fish House Punch. You’ll need a punch bowl and a large (2 gallon) pitcher or other container. Here’s the recipe: 1 1/2 cups superfine granulated sugar, 2 quarts water, 1 quart lemon juice, 2 quarts dark
“Freelance Hubrist”
rum, 1 quart cognac, 4 ounces peach brandy, and a large piece of ice that will fit in the punch bowl. In the mixing container, mix the sugar and water first. Make sure the sugar dissolves, then add the lemon juice. Finally, add the spirits and stir. Place the ice in the punch bowl, then add the punch. Use a punch ladle to serve into cups or tumblers. On the invitations, specify dress. It’s OK to ask for formal dress. If someone says they don’t have a tuxedo or evening gown, of course a suit, sports coat, dress, or even pant-suit will suffice. Don’t say “optional” – it’s implied. Depending on the occasion (Halloween? Mardi Gras?) you may wish to ask for costume or masquerade dress. You’ll be surprised how much fun your guests will have rising to the occasion. Prior to the event, make sure you clean and air out the place. Don’t overdo it – some gentle aromatic candles or potpourri ahead of time will suffice. Make sure the location is well ventilated and spacious. During your cocktail party, as host or hostess, make sure you are free to interact. Limit your drinking – you will be glad you did. Make sure your guests are comfortable and their needs are met. Keep the music light and in the background. Enlist friends or family to mix drinks and keep the place clean. As things wind down, make sure you have transportation ready. Have the number for a local taxi limo service on hand. Prepare bedding for the couch or guest room. Be prepared for one or two guests to spend the night. You’ll know which ones. All this may seem like a lot, but partygiving is a multi-faceted art form, and it really is well worth it.
blitzweekly.com
10 November 17 - 23, 2010
THE SPIRIT WORLD
MANHATTAN yield: 1 serving
• •
2 oz whiskey (rye or bourbon) 1/2 oz sweet vermouth (or more if desired sweeter) 2 or 3 dashes of angostura bitters
•
Directions: Stir with ice in a mixing glass and strain into a cocktail glass. Garnish with a maraschino cherry. (Some like a bit of orange zest as well.)
MOJITO
yield: 1 serving
• • • • •
2-3 oz of premium light rum Juice of one lime (1 oz) 2 tsp of sugar 3-4 sprigs of mint soda water
Directions: Use enough soda to dissolve sugar in the bottom of a rickey glass and then muddle most of the mint (using a wooden muddler) enough to bring out the mint color and aroma. Squeeze the lime into the mixture, add rum and ice, fill with soda and stir. Garnish with a sprig of mint.
SCREAMING ORGASM yield: 1 serving
• • •
1 oz Bailey’s Irish cream 1 oz orange liqueur (your choice) 1/2 oz cognac
Directions: Mix, add ice. (Note: there are lots of Orgasms out there. One of the most common calls for equal parts of vodka, coffee liqueur and Irish cream. Others add amaretto. Screaming is optional.)
O
ne of the easiest ways to appreciate other cultures is by drinking. From the beginning of time alcohol has made it easier for people to talk to each other. Abroad, when the native language is not spoken, alcohol helps the foreigner to take a chance on his vocabulary and more often than not, the native speaker will stammer out a few words in the foreigner’s language. Of course in business, where each side benefits by knowing the mind of the other, alcohol is indispensable. Even if alcohol is consumed for the same reasons, if it is consumed at all, from country to country there are vast differences in drinking style and in the substances consumed. Along with rum, whiskey was important to Americans from the beginning, and its origins in Scotland and Ireland made it part of our cultural heritage. Great whiskeys are drunk neat, and the greatest old-world whiskeys are the single-malt scotches and the whiskeys of Ireland. Glenlivet is a good place to begin. Balanced and smooth, it leaves warmth in the mouth and a glow of wellbeing begins to invade the imbiber’s entire body. This afterglow is common to all the great single malts. They do not inflame the senses, but seem to induce contemplation. Such whiskeys are a perfect adjunct to reminiscence or storytelling. To share a bottle of single malt is to share one of the best things in life. Glenlivet is the beginning of a journey for most people because there are scores of great single malts available to Americans now thanks to the internet. One of the most acclaimed is Livulan 16-year-old from the Islay region (by the sea). Along with its cousin Laphroaig some note a slightly medicinal, iodine taste, but the positives far outweigh the negatives. Irish whiskey, straight or blended, is lighter than the single malt scotches and lacks the smoky flavor from burning peat. It is the only whiskey in the world that is triple-distilled. Canadian whiskey can be many things, and “rye” in Canada has nothing in common with the rye of the ould sod. Crown Royal is justly famed for its smoothness and American visitors may be surprised to find that demure Canadian women will drink it neat right along with the men. The American product known as bourbon has Scot-Irish ancestry but is American to the core in the way it is made and the way it is drunk. Tennessee produces the best bourbon. Hard to say how the appellation “sippin’ whiskey” came into being because Tennessee people in the mountainous eastern part of the state will offer you a “sup.” A sup is a very small sip from an open bottle that is passed between whiskey-loving men. This is a custom of men outdoors and you’ll never see the communal practice in bars, but it’s a good way to appreciate the taste of a great whiskey—and to get to know real Tennesseans. Jack Daniels, a sour-mash product, is well-known to Texans. Blitz readers might like to try a few sups of Buffalo Trace—an award-winning bourbon that is known for its complexity and smoothness. Other liquors that are best drunk neat include the famous sorghum liquor of China: kaoliang, or gaoliang. As with great bourbons, repeated small sips create a sense of wellbeing. Alcohol content varies, but since you can’t be sure, it’s best to start slowly and avoid a fiery surprise. In Scandinavia akvavit, with its caraway taste, is tossed back with regularity, especially in the colder months. In general, perhaps because of the strong flavorings, the effect and aftertaste seem to be the qualities most esteemed. In the south of France, and really all around the Mediterranean, the flavoring of choice is aniseed. Pastis, ouzo, arak—all these have a strong licorice taste which makes them unsuitable for mixed drinks. All become cloudy when mixed with water, and are drunk diluted, often with ice. All
are renowned for digestive qualities and are sipped, though great quantities are sometimes consumed over the course of an evening. Brandies of all kinds are a European specialty. From the raw grappa of Italy, eau-de-vie of France and orujo of Spain, there are all grades and flavors up to the very best brandies such as cognac and armagnac in France and numerous well-aged varieties in other countries. Spanish brandies are a little sweeter than French, being distilled from sherry instead of white whine. Still, the gran reserva brandy of Spain, aged ten years, holds its own. Brandies distilled from various whole fruits have their loyal admirers in different countries, where they are drunk regularly before or after meals. The kirschwasser of Germany (from cherries) is of special note, along with Greek metaxa, with its resin taste; and slivovitz, from plums— common in all Slavic countries. The calvados of Normandy—made from apples but definitely not “apple-jack”—is graded like cognac and highly esteemed by lovers of strong drink. Others are made from apricots, pears, raspberries and blueberries. (Be careful not to confuse these reputable tipples with sweet, flavored brandies—cheap brandy laced with fruit syrups.) The pear brandy of France, made from Bartlett pears, is especially good, but all are enjoyable as a special treat by themselves or regularly after dinner. Most Texans know quite a bit about tequila by the time they come of age, if only as the main alcoholic ingredient in the margarita, which is the drink of choice with Mexican food. In recent years aficionados have created a huge market for aged tequilas—the reposados and añejos. These products of the agave cactus are now described in the same soaring language used to describe single-malt scotch or fine French wine. Those who have thought of tequila primarily as a mixer are in for a surprise. Try El Viejo Luis silver neat, with salt and a lime, to experience a light tequila with a bold agave taste. Then try a Don Abraham reposado. The rum that was once so important to commerce in colonial days and the early years of the American republic is making a comeback. Our American forbears drank a lot of it, often in mixed drinks. A favorite of Ethan Allen and the Green Mountain Boys was the Stonewall, rum mixed with cider. Later sources give it as bourbon and cider, but it was almost certainly rum. Of course another rugged American, Ernest Hemingway, preferred daquiris and mojitos, and the mojito is enjoying a huge revival in popularity. Another rum drink well worth a try is made with Malibu rum from Barbados, distilled from coconut extract. See the recipes that accompany this article. Gin has lost favor somewhat as a mixer, but it is especially good in drinks like the Salty Dog, where the juniper taste makes an interesting foil for the grapefruit. Of course the classic Martini is still in vogue and irreplaceable, though chocolate martinis and martinis made with flavored gin are gaining in popularity. Vodka is being drunk now the way it is drunk in Russia and everyone knows the upscale brands and has given them nicknames like old friends (Stoli). By the way, it is no sacrilege to use fine, triple-distilled vodka in mixed drinks, as it would be with great whiskey. Vodka is by far the best way to induce hesitant drinkers to give spirits a chance because it mixes with all flavors and seems to enhance the taste of fruits. Originally distilled from potatoes—a Polish vodka on the market now is still made that way—the difference in taste between the best vodkas is subtle except to connoisseurs. Even so, the best vodkas should be used in mixed drinks. You will taste the difference.
November 17 - 23, 2010 11
NO MORE HANGOVERS
I
Editor
t’s hard to keep it simple in writing about alcohol. Some people think that any alcohol consumption is bad for you. Avoid these people! If it turns out your wife is one of them, divorce her! Health gurus recommend one or two 3-oz. glasses of wine each day. Avoid these people also! Sorry, but no average-sized man is even going to feel three ounces of wine. After crawling in the desert, maybe. Which brings us to dehydration, the cause of most hangovers. Most of us know that hangovers can be prevented by flushing with water after a night of steady tippling. Even so, it’s annoying to be getting up in the night and swilling water with the full realization that the more you swill, the better the chance you’ll have to get up again. Does this mean you should only have one beer and put the brakes on? No. People who really like beer tend to like having a good soak. Yet large amounts of alcoholic drinks of any kind—particularly beer, because people drink so much of it—increase dehydration. Drinking light beer is little help. Anyway, if you like light beer for any reason but trying to trim your waistline, you don’t really like the taste of beer and should stop drinking it. My remedy will work for anyone but it’s of special value to people who really like to drink. All of us know the sort of drinker whose answer to the question, “Do you think you drink too much?” is “No, I never get enough!” These are the so-called problem drinkers or substance-abusers who help pay the rent for all the experts who know what’s best for you. Besides mine, the only advice you need to heed is: 1) don’t drink and drive; 2) eat foods high in protein when you drink to spare your liver. Tune out the rest. I don’t know why—there’s some very kinky psychology at work here—but when the hangover is taken out of the equation, and there is absolutely no price to pay for overindulgence, the human being stops overindulging. You don’t have to believe me, but try the remedy first and see if you don’t find that satiation is easier to reach and you’ve stopped chasing it. My surefire hangover remedy is built around a disgusting liquid form of soya lecithin marketed by the Fearn company of Mequon, Wisconsin. Lecithin in softgels will work just as well but you have to swallow a large handful and the process gets expensive. Certain sybarites of my acquaintance find lecithin from the bottle too nasty in taste and consistency to be drunk straight down the way I take it—usually two glugs right before bedtime. If you’ve got one of those rarefied palates, go for the softgels. It’s going to cost you, but you’re used to it. If you’re a person who likes to drink who also happens to be worried about cancer, you might try taking the lecithin with two or three capsules of grapeseed extract (200-300 mg of 95% OPCs or oligomeric proanthocyanidins). Cutting edge cancer research has found that lecithin potentiates the already important antioxidant properties of OPCs. Lecithin is good for all the organs, not just the liver. (The science is there if you look for it.) Alcohol is good for you, too. Besides the obvious boost to wellbeing that all of us could use in these troubled times, it promotes cardiovascular health by preventing arterial plaque buildup. True, some horrible diseases lie in store for those who can’t or won’t put the brakes on—all the way to Korsakoff’s syndrome, which used to be called “wet brain.” Moderation is no doubt the best policy, and always has been, but there is no reason we should have to suffer when we want to make a night of it with someone interesting. A pint of liquid lecithin should last you about a month and can be had for $4.69 at the Vitamin Cottage-Natural Grocers chain, which seems to have lower prices than other health food stores (Preston/Forest SW or Campbell/Coit NW). I’ve never refrigerated the lecithin and it will keep at room temperature, like honey. Types who are more germ-conscious might want to keep it refrigerated, but will have to warm the bottle before they can drink from it.
blitzweekly.com
by Jeff Putnam
November 17 - 23, 2010 13
In case you haven’t seen the awesome commercials, Call of Duty: Black Ops is out, and if you’re an FPS fan, you’re going to want to pick it up. Set during the Cold War, Black Ops skips the typical mindless shooting of the series’ WWII-era efforts and places you in the shoes of a special forces operative who roams as far as Cuba, Vietnam, and Russia to get the job done — a job that includes shooting, running, and even torture, and not the kind that comes from trying to beat a game like Abadox. (Price – $60)
iPod Watch Band
Thanks to its diminutive size and builtin clip, the new iPod nano isn’t just a music player — it’s a fashion accessory. Make it even more of one with an iPod Watch Band. Made from silicone, these bands come in a variety of colors to coordinate with whatever color nano you prefer, and offer full coverage for the nano, with push-through button covers and an integrated headphone port cover. If only it did FaceTime. (Price – $25)
Sony XNV 770BT Multimedia Navigation Player
If your current ride didn’t come with a factory navigation system, you might think you’re stuck without a clean, integrated in-dash solution. You’d be wrong. The Sony XNV 770BT Multimedia Navigation Player is a one-stop car entertainment powerhouse, sporting a 7-inch WVGA touchscreen display, GPS with integrated TomTom navigation and pre-loaded maps of North America — with a year of free map updates — a one-wire USB hookup for the iPod, iPhone, and other MP3 players, Bluetooth hands-free and audio streaming capabilities, a CD/DVD player with support for a wide range of audio and video file formats, an AM/FM radio, support for satellite radio, 52W x 4 Watts Max Power, and an included remote to keep the backseat drivers happy. (Price – $1,300)
by Jeremy Shorr
Hollywood has a long and checkered record of mining various genres for ideas. In recent years, comic books have become a major source of stories for new Hollywood movies. More exposure for comic books is a good thing – but how has all of this national exposure affected the actual business of selling comics? Speaking as a comic book store owner with 25 years of experience, I can safely say that the answer is mixed – kind of like the response to the movies themselves. When the first Batman and Superman movies were released in the late 1970s and the mid 1980s, there was a huge upswing in revenue for comic book stores as customers who had read the comic books as children were reminded of the excitement and fun of reading comics – and came trooping into the stores with money in hand to purchase those comics again. As the years rolled on and the sequels poured in, excitement was substantially reduced – like the revenue the sequels produced (Batman Forever, anyone?). Then, in 2000, X-Men was finally produced as a movie after entirely too many years of contract wrangling and director changes. And it was an enormous hit, setting records right and left. Comic book stores saw another huge upswing in people being interested in
the comics again, but sales were noticeably less impressive than those generated earlier by Batman and Superman. Customers were definitely looking for X-Men as characters, but they were less interested in the comic books as items to purchase. Marvel Comics saw the success of X-Men, quickly followed by the huge blockbuster status of Spiderman, as an opportunity to springboard their lagging company finances using movies as sales vehicles. Consequently, the last 10 years have seen quite a proliferation of movies using Marvel characters as their basis – Daredevil, Elektra, Wolverine, Ghost Rider, Iron Man, Hulk, Punisher, Blade, and Fantastic Four – some with multiple movies. There are also at least 10 more comic book character movies currently in production from Marvel Comics alone. DC Comics and Warner Brothers are also ramping up movie productions to keep up with the competition. The movie-watching public is clearly intrigued by all of these characters on the silver screen. Speaking as someone who relies on sales of comic books for his livelihood, it is very gratifying to be noticed by casual passers-by as a purveyor of the kind of material their favorite movie is based on. However, sales of comic books are not being swept up in the excitement and enthusiasm.
www.titancomics.com
Overall comic book sales have been steady across the board even in these uncertain economic times. Perhaps these steady sales are a reflection of the increased success of the characters and their franchises. Comic books have been steadily increasing their exposure in the national spotlight. Major market retailers like Borders and Barnes & Noble have started to carry large selections of graphic novels, albeit limited in scope. Rural areas have recently seen an influx in comic books through Hastings stores, which just started stocking an even more selective and narrow range of comic book titles. As more comic-book-based movies are released and the general reading public gains an affinity for the genre, increased sales will surely follow. My name is Jeremy Shorr and I own and operate Titan Comics in Dallas Texas. We’ve been in business for almost 20 years in Dallas and I’ve been selling comics for 25 years. Titan Comics has been named “Best of Dallas” 10 times over the years and carries a full line of comic books, graphic novels, comic book-related statues, posters, and t-shirts. We are located at 3701 W Northwest Hwy Suite 125 in Dallas and our telephone number is 214-350-4420. Our website is www. titancomics.com. Please feel free to come by and say, “Hi!” Mention this article and I will cheerfully extend a 10% discount to you as well.
blitzweekly.com
Call of Duty: Black Ops
blitzweekly.com
14 November 17 - 23, 2010
MAVS News
by Geoff Case “NBA Analyst”
Releasing the Kraken There is something different about this year’s edition of the Dallas Mavericks that we’ve never seen before. There is a toughness, an edge, a swagger or whatever you want to call it, that hasn’t been present in previous teams. The Mavericks have been labeled “soft” by many critics due to their unwillingness to play tough defense and tendency to shoot jumpers when the going gets tough. While the label may have been unfair (the Mavs best player is a jump shooter after all) there was some truth to what these people were saying. Not anymore. The Mavericks didn’t change the roster too significantly this summer, but one addition is reversing the aforementioned perception. The Mavs made a move this summer to send Erick Dampier and his luxury, tax-friendly contract to the Charlotte Bobcats for Tyson Chandler. Not exactly the showstopping trade that everyone was hoping for, but it was viewed as a solid addition at the time. The rap on Chandler was that he had been injured for much of the previous two seasons and because of his knees had lost the explosiveness that was absolutely key to his style of play. Honestly, the Mavericks probably weren’t exactly sure which “TC” they were going to get. Tyson Chandler proclaimed that the extra time he took off last season allowed his nagging knee injury to fully heal and the Mavs took a chance. The thought of a 100% healthy Chandler running the floor with Jason Kidd was just too tempting – they couldn’t pass on the deal. The deal was viewed as low risk and high reward since Chandler had only one year left on his contract. After watching a handful of games it has become clearly evident that he is a big reason for accountability among teammates at both ends of the court. Tyson Chandler has got his teammates talking to each other on defense and his emotion and high-flying ability is sparking the entire squad.
Devean George once commented on how strange it was that the Mavericks never talked to each other while on defense, a staple of those great Lakers teams he was on. Chandler has somehow transformed this team into a very impressive defensive squad. There were already a few players here known for their defense but now they all seem to be buying into the system knowing that Chandler will be waiting to send the ball into the crowd if they should falter. The dribblepenetrators who used to roam freely in the Mavs paint now fear they will make the wrong end of a SportsCenter highlight. Offensively he brings another aspect to the Mavs that they sorely need from the center position. Erick Dampier was a solid player here but emotionally he was always stuck in line at the DPS. Chandler’s earth-shaking ally-oop dunks from Kidd are deflating to the opposing teams and knock them out of rhythm. The edge Tyson brings emotionally trickles down through the entire roster to include Brendan Haywood, the center who assumed he would be starting. “He’s done a great job on the floor. He’s done a great job with his enthusiasm,” said Mavs Coach Rick Carlisle. “He’s an upbeat guy who’s always encouraging everybody, always into the game whether he’s in the game or not in the game. Those things all bring energy. That’s always a great thing.” The Mavericks are nowhere near a finished product but they finally have an edge and attitude that gives the team a real personality. Intimidation, toughness, emotion. Those intangibles can pay dividends in a long playoff series and can help a good team become a great team.
Upcoming Schedule: 11/17 @ New Orleans Hornets – 7PM 11/19 vs Chicago Bulls – 8:30PM 11/20 @ Atlanta Hawks – 7PM 11/23 vs Detroit Pistons – 7:30PM
November 17 - 23, 2010 15
Photos Courtesy: Beeflower
Pictured is the West Virginia birthplace of Pearl Buck, whose most famous books were about China, where she lived for decades. She was the first American woman to win the Nobel Prize.
Photos Courtesy: Steven G. Johnson, CJ Stumpf, Keith Allison
by Dennis Hambright
www.dennishambright.com
Change. It’s being urged upon us everywhere, from campaign slogans, self-help books sermons and Tarot cards. It is an exciting proposition, but do we actually practice it? Sometimes we are so consumed by our routine that we forget to embrace the beauty of the world, and by the time we realize it, we’re already zombies missing all the amazing details that are nothing more to us than fuzzy background noise. Just like frogs in boiling water, the routine numbs our senses so subtly over time that we don’t even realize what’s happening to us until it’s too late. So what is the result of the frog experiment besides a bunch of dead frogs? Not accepting and, most importantly, not implementing change can keep us from realizing our true desires. It keeps us in toxic relationships, soul-draining jobs, and eventually wears down our spirit. Change, then, seems pretty logical, so we must be crazy not to change our lives – right? – especially when we realize the path we’re on is a dead end. But people aren’t crazy for not changing their lives, they’re just scared. Change can be a very daunting prospect. You may think, “What if I can’t find someone else? I don’t want to be alone, and breaking up is depressing,” or “I hate my job and the stress is killing me, but what if I can’t succeed in a new career?” Those are valid fears, but do you really want to keep going down a bunch of wrong paths just because you are afraid of not finding the right one? One of the best ways to get out of that boiling water before you’re a dead frog is to travel somewhere where the way of life is different. Your senses will
I had a monkey when I lived in South America, named Martin (pronounced Marteen, because he was Latin, of course). He was a great monkey, and I got a helluva bargain when I bought him in a two-for deal from a native kid on the supply boat that ran between Guanay and Mapira down in Bolivia. For ten bucks, I got Martin and an emerald green parrot that I later found out was severely demented from being hauled around in a rubber bag for too long. He constantly squawked obscene Spanish words, viciously bit anybody who came near him, and gnawed paint chips off the wall. Martin-the-monkey was cute, but he was dumb as a sack of rocks. His sole pursuit in life was doing nothing more than constantly playing with his “monkey-hood” and stealing fried eggs off breakfast plates. Day in and day out, all he did was eat fried eggs and whip his little “business” around like a length of errant rope. In hindsight, since Martin was only about 18” tall, and his “rope” was at least 6” long, I suppose he had the right to be proud. Anyway… I’ve thought about Martin-themonkey a lot lately, because dumb as he was, I’m certain his behavior would be more logical and reasonable if he were in charge – instead of
be renewed and recharged and you will have a rejuvenated and fresh take on the world. Routine can easily alter our ability to make improvements on our ordinary way of doing things, but once we are removed from our comfortable bubble, we can see the world with fresh eyes and discover, perhaps, that our way of life can be improved with change, however small. I found this new perspective on a farm in West Virginia, surrounded by rolling hills covered in trees and far removed from strip malls, rumbling highways, and subdivisions. I ended up there on my quest to visit my birthplace, which was not a nearby hospital but an old barn. My parents were back-to-the-land hippies, so they did everything themselves, including childbirth. Looking at the dilapidated one-room barn, which was somewhere between The Grapes of Wrath and Little House on the Prairie, I was secretly glad I had no memory of it. But the new owners of the farm made the trip worthwhile. Bethlehem Farm, a Catholic charity, were hosting college volunteers who went out into the community to help repair homes for low-income people in the area. Along the way they also learned the most important aspects of environmentalism: growing your own food, being mindful of the amount of energy and resources you use on a daily basis – treading more gently on the Earth. For me, this way of life was a refreshing change from the mass consumerism and consumption that Americans are addicted to. Thinking how I could take less and give more gave my life a whole new meaning.
the knuckleheads we’ve saddled ourselves with these days, who run rampant across America, changing the rule book to fit their own demented ideas of what should be acceptable to the rest of us. (Note to self: Find out if any of our leaders were ever detained in a rubber sack for extended periods of time, or ate large quantities of paint chips.) When political correctness becomes the baseline for acceptable behavior, then the ship of state is doomed and we should all swim for shore! A couple of recent indicators that we might be taking on water: The NFL is threatening overaggressive players with being ejected from games, six figure fines, and even suspension if they hit too hard. What? Sure, “spearing” a player when he’s down, or grabbing a facemask and doing one of those “exorcist head twists” is wrong, but do you really want to tell a 250pound linebacker who runs a sub-five forty not to play too rough? This is football, people! These guys make millions of dollars for making themselves into the strongest, meanest, baddest modern-day gladiators in sports, and we want to tell them to play
nice? Really? If we’re going to do that, why don’t we just give them peppermintstriped knee-socks and send them on over to the soccer field. Next…NPR analyst Juan Williams got fired when he told Bill O’Reilly that he gets nervous when he sees Muslims on an airplane. Well, duh! They make me nervous too. Remember 9/11? And no, I’m not a bigot. All the same, if I see a guy wearing a Baptist summer camp T-shirt, and he starts trying to light his sneakers on fire, I’m going to jump on him like a rabid wolverine and slap a choke hold on him too. It’s not bigotry or racism or religions persecution. If a dog bites you on the face when you’re a kid, you’ll probably always be wary of dogs. That doesn’t mean you hate dogs, or think all dogs are bad… you’re just being cautious. No matter what Whoopi-andcompany think when they stomp off-stage like spoiled brats, we still have a little thing called freedom of speech…or is that only for the politically correct?
blitzweekly.com
How a Vacation Can Change Your Life
by Sam Chase
by Brian Beard
“Ultimate Fighter”
Gerald Harris (16-2-0) vs. Maiquel Jose Falcao Goncalves (25-3-0):
Do you enjoy watching Wanderlei Silva fight? If so, keep your eye on UFC newcomer Goncalves. He is from the same camp and has a very similar style. I like to call it technical brawling. Harris on the other hand is a very strong wrestler who loves to slam his opponents. Falcao will be the more well-rounded fighter and will carry the advantage in the striking department. Harris will have a definitive advantage in the wrestling but will it be enough? I think so. His freak athleticism and explosiveness will be the difference here, but we will be introduced to a future star in Goncalves. Harris by TKO, second round.
Matt Hughes
(45-7-0) vs. BJ Penn (15-6-1): Man, this is a tough one to call. These two have fought before and Hughes won by basically wearing Penn out and finishing him via TKO in the third. Although Penn is a wizard on the ground I feel like his advantage in this fight is in his boxing. He should be able to pick Hughes apart on his feet rather easily. It all depends on which Penn shows up. He is coming off two losses and has never lost three in a row. Hughes is coming off three wins and could be due for a loss. I think Penn will win via decision and the fight will never hit the ground. Hughes’ face will end up looking like the Toxic Avenger’s.
Rampage Jackson
(30-8-0) vs. Lyoto Machida (16-1-0): There will be two very different fighting styles in the cage for the main event. Machida is a very patient and technical fighter who has even been called boring. Rampage is very explosive and somewhat reckless at times and is always exciting. I think Machida has a big advantage in this fight. Rampage has been acting and doing things other than fighting the last couple of years and has not been all that active. Machida has been active and maintained fighting as his main focus. He is coming off his only loss against Shogun and will be looking for a big win. He will be methodical and patient and will wear Rampage smooth out. There is no quit in Rampage, but he will be KO’d in the third. Machida will clip him, he will do the Stanky Legg, and Rashad Evans will make fun of him.
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“Culture Warrior”
SIMPLY THE BEST Going east past the old storefronts on Main Street that remind us of the whistle stop that Richardson once was, just past Greenville, we find Afrah. Past the parking lot and some outdoor seating we enter a cafeteria-style room with pictures of old Beirut crowding the back wall. Gelato is sold beside the checkout counter along with elaborate pastries. I first visited Afrah at night and the first dish to get our attention was the fattoush, a Lebanese tossed salad, fresh as if it had just come from the garden, though restaurants that do lunch buffets frequently have tired produce by supper-time. Then came the hummus… something special also. Here I want to correct an error in an earlier report and urge you to visit this restaurant at lunchtime for the buffet. For about ten dollars, here are some of the offerings: The usual tabbouli, Greek salad, hummus, baba ghannouj, cold sliced eggplant, cold Italian-cut beans, cucumber/yoghurt dip, dolmades. The tabbouli is Lebanese-style, mostly parsley and sure to disappoint those who want to find it populated with kernels of bulgur wheat. The falafel will be as good as any you’ve tasted. All of the mezze are fresh as can be but please don’t stuff yourself with them. Save room for a hefty bowl of lentil soup—green, thick, heavily spiced, aromatic. No, forget the heft. Half-fill the bowl so there is sure to be room for what follows. What follows may be some of the best food you have ever tasted—that’s right, ever. First, the cooked okra, which leaves us wondering why we’ve paid so little attention to okra before now. Next there are the sautéed potatoes. The smaller slices might be almost chewy, but the large are crisp and salty on the outside but like custard inside. Next is the crowning miracle—an eggplant casserole that ranks as one of my bestever experiences of food, right up there
AFRAH 314 E Main St. (Beltline Rd.) Richardson Mon-Thu 10am-Midnight; Fri-Sat 10 to 1am; Sun 9am-Midnight; Lunch buffet Mon-Fri from 11-2:30; no alcohol, hookahs on patio with mouthwatering discoveries in the French and Spanish countryside during the years I lived there. The “bass fish,” infused with lemon, is interesting—especially good if you’ve saved some tabbouli and yoghurt for a foil. The meats aren’t up to the kebabs at dinner, but not to be outdone by other lunch buffets. The desserts are fine— custard slathered with pureed orange and a dark chocolate mousse studded with bittersweet tollhouse morsels. Afrah is the kind of spot to take a client when you’re not in a hurry—this is food to linger over. Other reasons include: a room that is spacious and cool; tables and chairs that are big and sturdy; and servers, mostly young women of college age, who are quick, helpful, but unobtrusive. Patronage by the MiddleEastern community of Dallas helps to secure the old-world feeling and during one visit an old-timer was directing the attention of his friends at table to one of the panoramic views of old Beirut on the back wall. Looking small beneath the huge enlarged photo he was pointing to a few small windows in one of the buildings. One wonders if the building still exists. Maybe not, and there are plenty of reasons for sadness when contemplating the good old days, but surely this old man and his friends have taken heart in the way, right here in the Metroplex, the culinary traditions of Lebanon have survived. On the way back into the world of get-it-while-you-can driving strategies, the memory of what I’d just tasted was already busy trying to convince me that I was the luckiest man alive.
Photos Courtesy: Ayad El-Horr
blitzweekly.com
16 November 17 - 23, 2010
HORRORSCOPES Scorpio (Oct. 23 – Nov. 21)
A hexapod robot will run away from its laboratory this week, change its name to “Bob,” and take up residence with you. Eventually, you’ll become best friends.
Sagittarius (Nov. 22 – Dec. 21) Try not to be too impulsive this week. Ask yourself if you really need that howitzer or if you just think it’d be fun to have.
FUNNIES
Capricorn (Dec. 22 – Jan. 19) Good week to curl up with a good book. Later, you will build a fort out of your furniture and some sheets, and shoot rubber bands at people.
Q: How do you get a redhead to argue with you? A: Say something!
Aquarius (Jan. 20 – Feb. 18) Saturday is an excellent day to fill some pantyhose with popcorn and do the reindeer dance.
Q: What do you throw to a drowning lawyer? A: His partners. Q: Why do bulimics love KFC? A: Because it comes with a bucket. Q: Hear about the flasher who was thinking about retiring? A: Ah, yes—until he decided to stick it out a little longer. One Helluva Dog! Two old men were sitting on a front porch just watching life pass by. Suddenly, a Great Dane walks across their front lawn. The dog stops, lies down, and begins licking itself. The first old man says, “Boy, I sure wish I could do that.” The other old man says, “I don’t know. If I were you, I might try petting him first.”
blitzweekly.com
JOKES
November 17 - 23, 2010 17
Pisces (Feb. 19 – Mar. 20) Good week to invent an anti-gravity device. Or at least, to tell everyone that’s what you’re doing. ACROSS: 1. Supplication 5. Pierce 9. Express 14. God Almighty 15. Unadulterated 16. Neuron 17. Keen 18. Winged 19. Electronic messages 20. Essential 22. Enforce 23. Exchange 24. Warning 26. Resinlike substance 29. A narrow channel of the sea 33. Nonintersecting 38. Therefrom 39. Goddess of discord (Greek mythology) 40. Not tight 42. Not long now 43. Tenant 45. Peafowl 47. Getting 48. Relative of an ostrich 49. A strong metal alloy
52. Kind of spray 57. Formerly, a writing tablet 60. Bad dream 63. Heathen 64. Expunge 65. Seaweed 66. Catkin 67. Arch type 68. Aspersion 69. Flavor 70. Noxious plant 71. Espied DOWN: 1. Flora 2. Paramour 3. Heath 4. Supplemented 5. Resorts 6. An ancient Toltec city in central Mexico 7. Palm cockatoo 8. Aquamarine 9. Excavate 10. Enchantress 11. Snare 12. Wickedness 13. Count upon
21. Peddle 25. High regard 27. Assert without proof 28. Chief executive officer 30. Dwarf buffalo 31. Religious figure 32. Canvas dwelling 33. Animal skin 34. District 35. Hazard 36. Helper 37. Chop off 41. Third person pronoun female 44. Accord 46. Parental sister 50. Fund 51. Feudal lord 53. Accumulate 54. French for “Room” 55. Quarrel 56. Acquire knowledge 57. Expectorated 58. Tibetan monk 59. Matures 61. Joy 62. Attention
Aries (Mar. 21 – Apr. 19) If you love someone, let them go. If you hate someone, grab ’em and hang on like a dog with a stick. Snarl a bit, too – that’s always fairly effective.
Taurus (Apr. 20 – May 20) Friday is a bad day to call someone a “whiney genx cyber-cowboy.” Saturday’s better for that one.
Gemini (May 21 – Jun. 21) Try to avoid nibbling on things this week. Despite recent developments, you don’t actually know your friends that well yet.
Cancer (Jun. 22 – Jul. 22) As a joke, you will put a remote controlled monster under someone’s bed. That will be really funny, although perhaps not quite as funny as when they put a real monster under yours.
Leo (Jul. 23 – Aug. 22) This week you will irritate people. In fact, you’ll irritate yourself.
Virgo (Aug. 23 – Sept. 22) On Sunday you will begin a bitter and drawn-out battle with a gopher. You don’t stand a chance.
Libra (Sept. 23 – Oct. 22) You’ve about had it with one particular fool in your life. Have you considered investing in a tranquilizer gun? Ours comes in very handy, especially at work.
blitzweekly.com
18 November 17 - 23, 2010 by Pat Moran
The era of the Ironic Mustache has to end. Sprung from the murky hipster depths of Portland and the articulate hell-hole of Brooklyn, the Ironic Mustache has somehow invaded every nook and cranny of our culture and it seems destined to overtake us all. I, for one, am making a stand. I, for one, cry foul. Hipsters and yuppies exist and will never be defeated. They tried with the hippies, but you just can’t win. Same thing with the crazies on either side of the political spectrum: you can’t fight it and you won’t win. But all of these smelly, annoying, mustachioed kids are too much. The mustache used to mean something. It used to be a status mark for those who could grow it. You were either a badass or a creepy nut job, but not some post-pubescent art college dropout with a penchant for PBR’s and elitism. So I say we put an end to this facial hair failure. Friends don’t let friends have Ironic Mustaches. They aren’t ironic and they hardly deserve even to be called mustaches. Do the world a favor and shave ’em off, kids. Now, that would be ironic.
“Man on his Throne”
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