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6 Since being ousted in the 2008 playoffs the Mavericks have experienced great success. So how valuable is head coach Rick Carlisle? 8 DISD football has a storied history of producing NFL players, but are those days long gone? You’ll find your answer here. 10 Jerry Jones and the Dallas Cowboys are known for giving questionable players second chances. In the case of Greg Hardy, has the organization made a mistake? 14 Steven Doyle has a list of wonderful Dallas venues that offer chili and what you need to know. 16 Our 2015 Holiday Gift Guide. Enough said.
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18 Biggie Smalls and Tupac Shakur are forever linked for many reasons and now we know the true story. 22 Thinking about driving for Uber? You’ll definitely want to read this article first.
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VOL. 8 - ISSUE 11
DECEMBER 2015
{In-depth}
BY MARK MILLER – @MARKMYWORDSTEX
Hancock Says No Need to Change College Football Playoff
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UFC 194
Preview BY LANCE LEVAN – @LANCELEVAN1 Ultimate Fighting Championship 193 is being held in Las Vegas on Saturday, Dec. 12. I have been waiting for this fight card for a long time. The two top fights are for a championship belt and the title fights are the champions taking on the No. 1 contenders. Those fights are the best. Any of the top three fights could easily win “Fight of the Night” honors. I can’t wait to watch this entire fight card.
As someone who has overseen the National Collegiate Athletic Association Final Four, college football’s Bowl Championship Series and the College Football Playoff, Bill Hancock knows what it takes to make high-profile events successful. So when the CFP executive director says don’t expect much to change in Year 2, it’s because Year 1 went so smoothly. “It couldn’t have gone any better,” the 65-year-old Hobart, Okla., native recently said from his 10thfloor Irving office. “We planned, we role-played but we didn’t know. It’s like a coach going through August practice. He thinks he knows what the players are going to do but he doesn’t really know until the kickoff. So we really didn’t know. “We thought we were ready. During the fall and during December have proven that this would be a tremendous event. It couldn’t have gotten off to a better start. And I think, it’s arguably the first signature sporting event created in this country since the Super Bowl.” Such success means there will not be more than four teams or differences in the way current schools are chosen. “There’s no talk about expanding,” he said. “When people ask me about expanding, I always ask them ‘why do you want to expand’ and there are two common answers. One is ‘I want to watch more football’ and the second one is ‘you would do away with people being upset.’ “To the more football matter, that’s a very good problem to have. I don’t mind that at all. To the second part, it’s just not true. You’re just not going to do away with disappointed people. Team 9, Team, 17, Team 33, Team 65 are going to be disappointed and rightly so.” Perhaps nobody understands that better than Hancock with 16 years overseeing the NCAA Tournament and more than 10 years with managing the BCS/CFP. “You understand what people think but in our business you get in trouble if you try to make everybody happy,” he said. “In sports if you have a popular event like we do, you have to understand
that people who don’t get into it are going to be disappointed. “We’ve only got four spots. We had it in the (NCAA) tournament when I was there. We had 64 teams and teams 65 through 70 were very disappointed and it still happens today. It goes with the territory and I wouldn’t trade it for anything because it shows what a popular event we have.” The CFP’s first year worked so well, no changes were made to the format of the selection committee which still meets weekly from early November until early December at the Gaylord Texan in Grapevine. The 12 members typically arrive Monday morning, then meet into the evening. They resume discussions the following morning before deciding and announcing their weekly rankings in the evening. For selection weekend, they’ll arrive on Dec. 4 and announce the four teams on Dec. 6. Hancock said one of the biggest differences with the CFP and BCS is trying to be as transparent as possible with the selection process. Despite best efforts, he said people still didn’t understand how the BCS system worked. Most people do know the 2016 CFP title game will be in Glendale, Ariz. Ensuing years will have the title game in Tampa, Fla., in 2017, Atlanta in 2018, Santa Clara, Calif., in 2019, and New Orleans in 2020. While Arlington’s AT&T Stadium, site of the first championship in January, didn’t bid for those years, it will host one of this year’s Dec. 31 semifinals and again in 2018. Hancock would love the Metroplex to host again but in the meantime, he’s happy to have one of the world’s best jobs. “I’m so lucky. I’m getting to do things I never imagined when I was growing up in southwest Oklahoma,” he said. “Sometimes I have to pinch myself. “I did the Final Four for 16 years and loved every minute of it. But when I got a chance to go to the BCS, I jumped on it because being an Oklahoman and near Texan, I love college football, always have, always did. So it was not a hard decision to come over to football.”
(C) Jose “Junior” Aldo (25-1-0) vs. (No. 1) Conor “The Notorious” McGregor (18-2-0) This is going to be a five-round men’s featherweight (145 pounds) title fight. This is a fight that a lot of fans have been waiting to see. Aldo is on an 18-fight win streak. He is the champion for a reason. He is a black belt in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu and a Muay Thai fighter. He is dangerous from everywhere. However, McGregor is a force to be reckoned with as well. He is a brown belt in BJJ and well-versed in boxing, kickboxing and Capoeira. I have been an Aldo fan for several years. I think he is an awesome champion and a good role model for kids. But I don’t think he can handle McGregor’s style. McGregor is on a completely different level of MMA than most fighters just like Muhammad Ali, Mike Tyson and, more recently, Ronda Rousey, McGregor is taking the sport to a new level. Like Babe Ruth and Ali, he is predicting what he will do during a fight (and following through with his predictions). My prediction: McGregor wins unanimous decision.
will come down to conditioning and strategy. I think we are going to see a lot of grappling and submission attempts starting in Round 1. Don’t ask me to defend my decision in this match. I am basing this solely on a gut feeling. I think they are both awesome fighters and I think that either of them could win this match on any given day. My prediction: Rockhold wins via submission in Round 3. (No. 2) Ronaldo “Jacare” Souza (23-3-0, 1NC) vs. (No. 3) Yoel “Soldier of God” Romero (10-1-0) This is a three-round middleweight (185 pounds) fight. These two fighters are very different in their styles. Souza is a very technical grappler with more than half of his fights ending in a submission. Romero is a brawler with 90 percent of his fights ending in KO/TKOs. Souza is a black belt in BJJ and in Judo. Romero is a wrestler. Neither of them will quit nor go down easily. I can totally see this fight winning “Fight of the Night” honors. Jacare will be looking for the submission and Romero will be looking to knock someone out. In my opinion, Souza has tons more experience with high-level fighters. I think that this will make the difference in this contest. My prediction: Souza wins via submission in Round 2.
(C) Chris “The All-American” Weidman (13-0-0) vs. (No. 1) Luke Rockhold (14-2-0) This is going to be a five-round men’s middleweight (185 pounds) fight. Both of these guys are black belts in BJJ. Both of them like to throw punches in bunches. Both of these guys are very aggressive fighters. I do not see this fight going all five rounds. Rockhold has a better percentage for submissions but the champ has better KOs. I think that this is an awesome match-up and it could be anybody’s match. It
Disagree with me about the UFC 194 matches? Let me know via Twitter @BlitzWeekly and we’ll see who has better picks the night of the fights.
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THE INVALUABLE RICK CARLISLE BY MATTHEW BEHRNDT – @MATTBEHRNDT15
T
he Dallas Mavericks have been among the most consistentlysuccessful franchises over the past 15 seasons. Since the turn of the current century only two teams have a higher winning percentage than the Mavericks – the Los Angeles Lakers and San Antonio Spurs.
There are many factors that have led Dallas from being a team trapped in the bowels of the Western Conference to one of the better in recent memory. One factor has been great ownership by Mark Cuban, who has given the team all the resources it has needed to compete at a high level. Another is having great players including Michael Finley, Steve Nash, Jason Kidd, and of course the greatest ever to wear a Mavericks uniform, Dirk Nowitzki. However, there is one factor that has to combine both the resources and the talent in a way that will achieve perfect harmony. That position is held by the head coach. The Mavericks, in the past 15 years, have had three really good coaches but only one led them to a championship.
Along Came Carlisle After a first-round loss in the 2008 playoffs, the Mavericks organization decided to move in a different direction at head coach, hiring Rick Carlisle. Carlisle was well known at that time for his ability to lead a team and being able to use players to their full potential. He had a very good coaching record with both the Detroit Pistons and the Indiana Pacers but couldn’t quite reach the ultimate goal of winning a National Basketball Association championship. When Carlisle arrived in Dallas, the Mavs had not been able to get over the hangover of a disappointing 2006 Finals. They had just lost in the first round for the second year in a row and patience was growing thin for both Cuban and their fans. In Carlisle’s first year he helped lead the Mavs to a 50-32 record, good enough for the No. 6 seed in the West. In the first round they met the Spurs. The Mavericks won the series in convincing fashion taking the series 4-1 mainly because of a great defensive game plan to stop Tim Duncan.
Joe Lorenzini SMARTER, SHARPER MEN
Carlisle, in his first year, already had helped lead the team past the first round over a team that was supposed to be in the conference finals
again. In the next round however, a young and talented Denver Nuggets team led by Carmelo Anthony dominated offensively winning the series over the Mavericks 4-1. In Carlisle’s second year, the Mavericks once again made the playoffs. This time however, they were the No. 2 seed. Unfortunately, they had to play a highly-motivated Spurs team that had lost to them the year before. The Mavericks lost the series 4-2 and Mavericks fans were starting to doubt again.
The Run That No One Saw Coming However, Carlisle’s third year will be remembered by Mavericks fans forever. It was an older team that a lot people saw as good, but on the downhill slope. It finished third in the West with a 57-25 record. The playoffs however, is where Carlisle really shined. His game plans were flawless. In the first round he played a better defensive player in Tyson Chandler on Portland’s LaMarcus Aldridge instead of Nowitzki. This kept Nowitzki fresh and overall the Mavericks won the series 4-2. In the next round they played the Lakers. Not only did they beat the defending champions, they swept them. A great plan to keep Nowitzki on Pau Gasol left Chandler in the paint and forced the Lakers to take a lot of jump shots. Also, Carlisle subbed in Shawn Marion every time Kobe Bryant came in as a defensive specialist and basically shut down the entire triangle scheme for the Lakers. In the conference finals they played a young Oklahoma City Thunder team led by Kevin Durant and Russell Westbrook. Basically, Carlisle forced the duo to take jump shots and completely took away James Harden, ultimately resulting a 4-1 series win. In the Finals they faced a Miami Heat team that had the Big 3: Lebron James, Dwyane Wade, and Chris Bosh. Carlisle forced the Heat to play small with Udonis Haslem guarding Nowitzki and Chandler on Bosh. A great defensive effort by Marion on James really helped force Bosh and Wade to take most of the shots. The Mavericks won the series 4-2 and a title with a great game plan by Carlisle, as well as a dominating performance by Nowitzki. Since Carlisle’s hiring in 2008 the Mavericks have only missed the playoffs once. His great coaching ability shows when his resume includes an NBA championship and the fact that the Mavericks have never finished below .500.
On Nov. 2, Carlisle passed Don Nelson (399) as the all-time wins leader in Mavericks franchise history. In a post-game interview with Mavs. com, Carlisle thanked three people after the win against the Lakers. “Well, Nellie is one of the greatest coaches ever. In his honor tonight, I’m going to crack open a beer and drink one to him, ‘cause he’s one of the all-time greats,” he said. “He’s a great friend, and there are many people to thank that put me in this position. But the two main ones I gave big hugs to in the locker room, and that’s Mark Cuban and Dirk Nowitzki. “You know, a guy doesn’t get in this position unless you have a great owner and one of the alltime great franchise players, so I’m very blessed. All the love and respect to Nellie for what he stood for in this game and how he’s mentored so many of us younger guys along the way, and I’m very fortunate.”
The Value Nowitzki also talked to Mavs.com after the game about Carlisle’s value to the team. “He’s been pushing all the right buttons for us,” Nowitzki said. “He’s a great motivator for us when he needs to be, and he backs off when he needs to. He just always finds a middle ground, and he’s a great in-game adjuster. He usually has great game plans, and he’s one of the best in the business, so we’re glad he’s ours. And as it looks, he’s going to be here for a long, long time. We’re happy with that.” On Nov. 5, just three days after passing Nelson as the all-time leader in wins, the Mavericks signed Carlisle to a five-year $35 million extension. The extension will begin during the 2017-18 season and will end after the 2021-22 season. Cuban talked about how it was a no-brainer to re-sign Carlisle. “We are excited to retain Coach Carlisle in the Mavericks family,” he said. “He is a championshipcaliber coach that has made this organization better on and off the court.” With Carlisle at the helm until 2022 at least, Mavericks fans can be reassured that this team will be in contention for years to come.
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Texas Rangers are Making a List and Checking It Twice BY PATRICK R. MALONE – @PATRICK_MALONE JUST AS SOON AS IT HAPPENED, IT WAS ALL OVER. It was the bat-flip heard ‘round the world; a pinnacle, heart-wrenching moment, in what was an otherwise phenomenal season for the Texas Rangers. Although frowned upon and mostly scoffed at amongst peers within Major League Baseball, Jose Bautista’s shenanigans at home plate were all the Blue Jays needed to seal the deal, eventually sending Toronto to the American League Championship Series and the Rangers back to Arlington. Now the baseball season is over, the Kansas City Royals are World Series champs and the offseason has officially begun. For the Rangers, now isn’t the time for reflection or shoulda, coulda, wouldas. They aren’t sending out invites to their pity party, nor are they pointing fingers or placing blame for imploding the way they did to end their season. Nope, it’s business as usual at Globe Life Park for Jon Daniels and Company. “We’re just starting our meetings,” Daniels said, via Jeff Wilson of the Star-Telegram. “Obviously, we have meetings and are constantly analyzing where we’re at.” Step 1: Shoring Up the Coaching Staff
was pitching coach from 2011-2013, a special assistant and pitching advisor in 2014, and pitching coach for Double-A Corpus Christi this past season.
southpaws to the mound and dominate their bats. According to baseball-reference.com, left-handers hit .239/.304/.385 against left-handed pitchers, a slash line that left little to be desired.
Holman, Triple-A Round Rock’s pitching coach for the last three seasons, was promoted to bullpen coach. This is his first time on a major league staff after earning the 2013 Bobby Jones Player Development Man of the Year Award from the Rangers.
“…Just in general we’re very left-handed,” Daniels said on KRLD FM 105.3 The Fan. “If we can balance that, whether it’s a complementary player that fits the roster really well or if it’s a bigger acquisition, a bigger player, maybe swap out left for right, that’s a consideration as well.”
Iapoce will serve as hitting coach, a hiring that surprised many, but looks like a home run. He spent the last three seasons in the Chicago Cubs’ organization as Special Assistant to the General Manager and Player Development. He oversaw the Cubs’ minor league hitting program, which included players like Kris Bryant, Addison Russell, and Javier Baez, all now contributing at the big league level.
So a right-handed bat surely is on the Rangers’ todo-list. With that in mind, let’s take a look at some key positions that the Rangers could be looking to upgrade.
Mashore also was promoted from Triple-A Round Rock, where he served as the hitting instructor, and will assist Iapoce. Mashore was a strong candidate to replace Magadan and viewed by many as the coach who “fixed” Rougned Odor when he was sent down to Triple-A halfway through the season. Step 2: Qualifying Offers
The first order of business was the coaching staff. This is American League Manager of the Year Jeff Banister’s first full offseason leading the Rangers and he and Daniels started things off quickly by changing up parts of their on-field leadership team.
The Rangers had to make a tough decision concerning pitcher Yovani Gallardo to qualify him or not? That was certainly the big question moving forward, but the Rangers did the right thing and extended Gallardo that offer.
Dave Magadan, Andy Hawkins and Mike Maddux are out; Doug Brocail, Brad Holman, Anthony Iapoce and Justin Mashore are in, giving Banister a bigger coaching staff than he could have requested.
The qualifying offer was $15.8 million, a number based on the average of the top 125 salaries in baseball. Gallardo declined the offer making him a free agent and the Rangers will receive a draft pick from the team that signs him.
“They all have specific skill sets and areas of expertise,” Banister told Evan Grant of the Dallas Morning News. “But they are also well-versed in the game of baseball. I want more than just specific expertise; I want guys who have the ability to reach across and help other staffers or other players out. We have a group now I feel that can reach anybody on the team.” Brocail will serve as the Rangers pitching coach following five years with the Houston Astros. He
This is the game the Rangers play. They acquire and develop draft picks, turn their farm system into one of the best in the leagues, and use it to acquire players like Gallardo and Cole Hamels. Rinse and repeat. Step 3: The Hot Stove The 2015 Rangers had one glaring problem – they were so left-handed heavy, it showed in the first half of the season when teams would send their
One is at catcher. Last season, the catching position was one of the worst at hitting, going .225/.307/.403 for the year. Injuries also plagued the position for much of the season. Robinson Chirinos (.232/.325/.438) did most of the catching, appearing in 74 games. When sidelined with injuries to start the last half of the season, he gave way to Chris Gimenez (.255/.330/.490). Rick Weiner, featured columnist for Bleacher Report believes that even though Chirinos is a “horrific pitch-framer,” he knows the pitching staff and offers average offensive production. He says that keeping the 31-year-old around on a oneyear, $1.25 million deal make sense. Trading also could be an avenue to upgrade the catching position. One catcher the Rangers had been linked to in the past was right-handed batter Jonathan Lucroy of the Milwaukee Brewers. Lucroy, another player battling injuries last season, had a big season in 2014 in which he hit .301/.373/.465. Lucroy also has hit .307 for his career vs. LHP.
surprise as a rookie. He stole 25 bases and hit .261 on the season after converting from second base. While DeShields has the speed to cover center field, his defensive play towards the end of the season indicated he’s still got a ways to go. In fact, fangraphs.com shows that his ultimate zone rating (UZR), a statistic that attempts to quantify how many runs a player saves or gives up through their fielding ability or lack thereof, is below average at -5.7. Jackson is a superb center fielder, posting an 11.8 UZR over his five-year career, according to fangraphs.com. Jackson has played for three teams in three years, causing his production to dip. However, this could be a good bargain for the Rangers on a one- or two-year deal since they have Nomar Mazara and Lewis Brinson waiting in the minors. It’s also possible the Rangers could surprise everyone and do nothing during the offseason and go into spring training with the same group that ended 2015. “Probably not going to see us engaged in the topend of free agency,” Daniels said on The Fan. “The reality is we’ve made some big investments and they’re part of the core of this team along with the young guys that are coming up around them. Our payroll can be give or take where it was this year. Relatively flat, but that’s plenty of room for us to operate in.” This could just be a smoke screen from Daniels. The Rangers have the prospects and personnel within the organization to make an impact. They also have Yu Darvish coming back from Tommy John surgery, which gives the team options to round out their pitching staff.
The Rangers have a deep farm system. Even after selling away top prospects for Hamels at the 2015 trade deadline, Texas still boasts the No. 9 best minor league system according to Jim Callis of MLB.com. So Texas can go out and get a player they need if they want, including Lucroy.
Step 4: Sit Back, Relax and Let the Games Begin
Denton’s Austin Jackson (.273/.333/.399) is a righthanded free agent and could offer a boost to the 2016 lineup. The Rangers already have a starting center fielder in Delino DeShields, a tremendous
Now it’s just a waiting game till mid-February when pitchers and catchers report for spring training. Let’s hope they’ve solved a few of the left-handed problems by then.
The Rangers have a short list of to-dos this offseason and a good understanding of what they want to accomplish. They’ve completed two steps already, which means that the fun part of the offseason is finally upon us.
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VOL. 8 - ISSUE 11
The Death of DISD Football and the Black Flight Exodus of Oak Cliff BY DARIUS WILLIAMS – @BLITZWEEKLY
A
As the horn sounded, ending what was scheduled as a game on Sept. 18, 2015 between a small private school located in East Dallas named Bishop Lynch and the once “area-dominant” school, Dallas Roosevelt, the final score wasn’t indicative of the way things used to be. For those not in attendance, which entails everyone except the reported estimate of about 150 who sat in the stands to witness what actually happened, word quickly spread throughout the Metroplex via social media that NINETY, that’s right, ‘90’ points had been put on the scoreboard by one team while the other team failed to change the zero. That’s right, the same ‘0’ points that were on the scoreboard during pregame warm-ups. The Dallas Independent School District began its desegregation process during the turbulent late 1960s. Separated by a radius of only 12 miles, South Oak Cliff, David W. Carter and Justin F. Kimball all were built from the late 1950s into the middle 1960s and predominantly with “all white” enrollments. Franklin D. Roosevelt opened in 1964 to accommodate the overflow of African American, then racially-labeled as Negro, students who lived north of Illinois Avenue and east of Marsalis Avenue in Oak Cliff who were being bused to James Madison and Lincoln Highs in South Dallas. By the 1970s, the landscape began to change. South Oak Cliff, better known by its acronym of SOC, saw its enrollment change quickly from all white to predominantly all black overnight it seemed. Both Carter and Kimball saw their own enrollments begin to change, although not to the extreme as to what had occurred over at SOC. Sitting further south, these two schools were surrounded by finely-manicured SMARTER, SHARPER MEN
lawns leading up to newer brick homes, unlike the less-expensive framed homes that covered the district from which SOC pulled its students. Other DISD high schools are purposely excluded from this topic. Forty years ago, when talk of DISD football was brought up, usually that dialogue was somehow attached to what was known then as ‘The Big Four’... the aforementioned Roosevelt, SOC, Carter and Kimball. Those teams were comprised of the best athletes Dallas had to offer. Each had enrollments teetering around 3,000 and finding quality players walking the hallways was an easy task for the coaches of these schools. Competing in the same District 12-4A, back when 4A was the largest classifaication in the University Interscholastic League, it was arguably the toughest district in the state. In a time unlike today where as many as four teams from a district can advance to the state playoffs, back then only the champion was rewarded with a playoff appearance. Never was that one team a part of any of the others who completed the District 12-4A (Sunset, Adamson, North Dallas and Pinkston). It always was one of ‘The Big Four.’ There was an embarrassment of riches at these schools throughout the 1970s and well into the early 1990s. With names like Harvey Martin, Wayne Morris, Michael Downs, Tim Collier, John Washington (Jefferson), Jeff Fuller, Richmond Webb, Aaron Wallace, Kevin Williams and Jesse Armstead to name a few who went on to play professionally, the competition amongst the teams were of epic proportion. Crowds filled the stands of Sprague Stadium and the Cotton Bowl, usually the designated locations for the battles amongst the four. It was standing-room-only
in most cases. The buzz leading up to these games was magical as the anticipation of high school football at its finest was to be displayed.
upbringing and education than what they had experienced started to become a normal occurrence.
Players took pride in representing these schools. Childhood friends in a lot of cases, the boundary lines which determined where you went to high school was thin. For example, Kiest Boulevard separated kids who attended Oliver Wendell Holmes Middle School together. If you lived south of it, you were to attend SOC. North of Kiest and Roosevelt is where you would have to attend. Former SOC athlete and 1975 graduate Aaron Nealey mentioned the pride that players from his era had for their schools and neighborhoods.
Not only were the southern suburbs the recipients of “black flighters,” communities to the east and west of Dallas like Mesquite, Grand Prairie and Arlington became landing spots as well for these black 20-something professionals looking for a better place to raise a family.
“The term pride each school and community took during that era is an understatement. Talking about wearing it as a badge of honor to represent your school and community in any sport or competitive activity,” said Nealey. Unfortunately the same can’t be said for these schools or the community for that matter with the product we see today and for the past two decades. ‘White Flight’ is a term used for the unplanned and hurried relocation of white people who lived in large metropolis’ like Dallas in the late 1960s. Moving trucks were plentiful in parts of Oak Cliff during this time as some whites didn’t want black families living in their neighborhoods. It was their belief that somehow with a single black family purchasing a home within a ‘rock’s throw’ of their home, the value of their property would plummet well below its actual value. So up went the ‘For Sale’ signs and off to Plano, Lewisville, Duncanville, and Grand Prairie they went.
The 1970s black sitcom The Jeffersons’ introduction theme song was titled “Moving on Up.” It signified the idea of black people doing well for themselves financially and as a result of it, their status symbol to show that success became where you lived and the home they owned. Those framed homes and apartment complexes in which most were raised no longer were good enough in which to reside. If they saw themselves as a success and wanted others to view them that way as well, then purchasing a $35,000 flat on Overton Road wasn’t going to suffice. Now the “cookie cutter” subdivisions of suburbia became the mark of success. The 2,500-square-foot floor plans were three times the size of the 800 square feet of living space they knew as a kid. Never mind the ARM (Adjustable Rate Mortgage) of their new home that could possibly see them paying upwards of $2,000 a month, it was well worth every penny spent for them to “appear” successful. They had “moved on up” just like The Jeffersons did on the television show.
Some 25-plus years later, what is known in some circles within the Oak Cliff community of Dallas as ‘Black Flight’ happened. Now this wasn’t done in the same way ‘White Flight’ was executed. Black home owners in Oak Cliff were not concerned about the resale value of their homes being compromised. ‘Black Flight’ happened as a result of a race of people who began to do better financially and wanting to live that American Dream like any other race of people would want.
With the population increase of the surrounding suburbs of Dallas by those who saw fit to do so, the trickle-down effect of DISD football began to rear its head. If families with kids of age were no longer living in south Dallas, the enrollment of the schools had to take a hit as well. As early as 1990, both Roosevelt and South Oak Cliff saw a steady decline in their enrollments. Long being in the UIL’s highest classification, 5A as of 1980, realignment saw fit to drop both schools down to 4A. Enrollments at Carter and Kimball were high enough to remain in 5A, yet those numbers continued to drop with each passing year, subsequently landing them in a lower classification as well.
College educated with well-paying jobs now, the chance to purchase homes in the southern suburbs of Dallas County like Lancaster, Desoto, Duncanville and Cedar Hill became a reality for those people who were born and raised on or near major Oak Cliff thoroughfares like Kiest, Lancaster, Ledbetter, Westmoreland, Marsalis, Camp Wisdom, Polk and Illinois. These neighborhoods always rated high in crime rate, the chance to live “a better life” and give their own kids a chance at a better
As declining student head counts were taking place at ‘The Big Four,’ Cedar Hill High was experiencing a sharp increase. Forever straddling the 4A/3A line, DISD leadership suddenly saw fit to construct a larger school for the influx of new students of darker hue. For example, in 1986, Cedar Hill graduated 165 students with fewer than 20 being African American. Fast forward to 2005, the graduating class numbered 447 with 274 African American. That’s a little more than a
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1,000 percent increase in African-American students within that time frame. It should also be noted that the 1986 class football team went 4-6. In 2006, Cedar Hill went 16-0 and was crowned 5A Division II State Champions, the first of three titles for the Longhorns. It’s not a coincidence that this former pushover suddenly became a “football factory” as a result of ‘Black Flight’ from Oak Cliff.
DECEMBER 2015
Former & Current NFL Players from “The Big Four”
Subsidized housing had long been something the inner city had for its residents whose income was low enough. Even if they had a viable source of income, many received government assistance for their housing needs. Government projects were where you would usually find those on this program. As families grew, but not their income, freestanding homes were made available to lease on the program. These homes were mostly in close proximity to the projects, never in the well-maintained neighborhoods of Oak Cliff. In the late 1990s, the southern suburb property owners began to offer their homes to those receiving these benefits. These were basically investment properties and they could count on the guaranteed monthly payment from the government. This vessel to suburban life came without the hard work and good jobs that the “moving on up” crowd took to get there. The guaranteed government credit to a landlord’s account was this particular faction of folks’ vehicle to houses with attached garages and island kitchens. Both ways took kids, many very athletically gifted, out to the suburbs and away from ‘The Big Four.’ The combination eventually decimated the athletic programs, football in particular, of ‘The Big Four.’ Kids who would be attending Roosevelt like their parents did are now at Lancaster maybe. The offspring of SOC graduates are probably lining the halls of Cedar Hill. Carter and Kimball’s lineage may be over at Desoto and Duncanville. These schools have become elite programs in the
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state, producing state titles and ‘Ground Zero’ for college coaches looking to add talent to their roster. Even in lowered classifications, the struggle to be competitive on the field is a hurdle for Roosevelt, Carter and Kimball today. SOC has enjoyed some recent success after many years of mediocrity. It seems like those remaining talented middle school players in DISD who don’t end up playing for Skyline High School regardless of where they live, SOC manages to secure them. This past regular season saw Roosevelt, Carter and Kimball combine for a total of eight wins between the three schools. An eight-win season used to be seen as a disappointment for those schools 25 years ago.
MICHAEL CRABTREE CARTER H.S.
TASHAUN GIPSON KIMBALL H.S.
The demographic change in the neighborhood that surrounds Roosevelt, along with the low enrollment, has neutered the once-proud program. If only 400 kids are sitting in the classrooms daily, the odds of filling out a competitive team in Dallas are very slim. What you do wind up with is a team that surrendered 90 points to a small private school all while laying a “goose egg” themselves at game’s end. Times have changed for sure since that would never have happened in the past. ‘Black Flight’ is what led to that 90-point thrashing back on Sept. 18. The kids on the field that day got embarrassed as news of the defeat went viral nationally. It wasn’t their fault. Who is to blame are those who turned their backs on a community which once gave them so much. The pride in the community left as those folks “moved on up.” As a result, DISD football has become an absolute disgrace to those who still support those programs.
RICHMOND WEBB ROOSEVELT H.S.
JACQUIES SMITH SOUTH OAK CLIFF H.S.
Queue up the funeral procession music because the death of ‘The Big Four’ is inevitable.
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JERRY JONES AND THE LAND OF FREE PASSES BY LANCE RINKER – @LANCEMRINKER
NATE NEWTON
Jerry Jones wants us to believe he is a man who values giving second chances to those who have made a mistake or two. Jerry Jones wants us to believe his sole purpose for helping players who are in trouble with the law, have a history of violence and domestic assault, or deal with addiction and mental health issues among other things is because he’s such a great person. What many believe is his ‘good-will,’ if that’s what we’re calling it, has more to do with wanting to win than it does with helping someone become a better person.
It’s possible the truth lies somewhere in the middle. Perhaps Jones gives these free passes to players while making an attempt to provide them the resources needed to better themselves as human beings, only if they perform. According to former Dallas Cowboys quarterback Troy Aikman, as long as guys like Greg Hardy remain productive on the field then Jones will tolerate any ‘distractions’ off of it. Aikman joined The Musers on KTCK-AM 1310 The Ticket in Dallas in November to really talk about the history of the moves Jones has made in direct relation to troubled players. “I guess the line is when he’s no longer productive, you know? I think that’s always been the line for Jerry Jones, is he’s one to pretty much accept everything as long as a guy’s productive. There’s not many owners in this league like that. Obviously, (Carolina owner) Jerry Richardson isn’t like that. They could certainly use Hardy in Carolina even though they’re undefeated. As far as a pass rusher, they don’t have that type of guy, but (Richardson) wasn’t going to keep him. I think over the years, if you just look at the history of the moves that have been made and the players that have come through, the indiscretions that if at some point he’s not productive, then he won’t be on the team any longer regardless of whatever it is that’s going on off the field, and if he is productive, then he’ll be here as long as he is.” The Cowboys, and Jones, have a long history of bringing in troubled men who have either engaged in questionable behavior when it comes to drugs and alcohol, or troubled men who are violent and have a knack for smacking women around. Hardy, whom the Cowboys have been facing media and fan backlash for signing all season, isn’t some great guy who accidentally made one mistake. He has a history of lacking maturity, not being trustworthy, having a sense of entitlement, and of course – violent behavior. When you heard about what he allegedly did to his girlfriend, Nicole Holder, at the time it was bad enough. When pictures were released that showed the damage actually done, it was far worse than what Ray Rice did to his wife, then fiancé, Janay Palmer.
GREG HARDY SMARTER, SHARPER MEN
Just this season, the Cowboys also had to deal with the arrest of former running back Joseph Randle, who no longer is playing football. The history of players given free passes from
Jones and the Cowboys organization as long as they produced on the field is a long one. Michael Irvin was the Cowboys’ resident bad boy with issues during the 90s, mostly focused on drug and alcohol abuse though he did enjoy his prostitutes and was even caught snorting cocaine off the bare chest of one by the police. There were players in between Irvin and now Hardy who could be considered even worse. Nate Newton has been described as a violent man who beat the living shit out of his ex-wife on many occasions. The ex-wife of the former Cowboys offensive lineman says Hardy’s situation isn’t the first time Jones has knowingly supported a man who commits violent crimes against women.
MICHAEL IRVIN
In an interview with SI Now’s Maggie Gray, Dorothy Newton last month claimed the Cowboys not only knew about the “emotional” and “verbal” abuse inflicted on her by Newton while he was a player, but they also supported his behavior by providing him with such a free pass. “It was something that happened quite often,” Dorothy told Gray. “I just became the result of his way of releasing anger and frustration and a lot of things he was dealing with.” There was even a moment where Nate’s outside marketing representative revealed the alleged abuse to someone within the Cowboys organization. Instead of doing an actual investigation or involving law enforcement, the organization instead told Nate, and Dorothy endured one of the worst nights of her entire life as a result. “That’s when he came home and shoved a custom-made kitchen table into my pregnant stomach and scraped it, thank God, and also shot at me,” Dorothy said. Because Nate Newton was such a great performer on the field and helped the Cowboys to three Super Bowl victories, it didn’t seem to matter what he did off it. The Cowboys like to point to how they helped franchise wide receiver Dez Bryant turn his life around and make better life choices through their guidance. If we’re being honest, they stuck with Bryant because of what he is able to do on the football field. Granted, they were successful for how they provided the support system and structure Bryant needed coming out of college. But, we shouldn’t be so quick to dismiss the fact it was Bryant who made the decision to turn his life around. Even still, for every Dez Bryant who makes the decision to become better than he was as a person the day before, the Cowboys still go out of their way to accommodate the Greg Hardy’s, Nate Newton’s, and Josh Brent’s of the world. Not because they truly care who they are as human beings and wanting to help them get their lives back on track. No. The organization, and Jerry Jones, do it because of a certain level of desperation for victories on a football field. Ain’t that some shit. Jerry Jones and the Dallas Cowboys will only help you and dole out that free pass if they think they can get something out of you. Once that stops, so does the free pass. Good luck playing and rooting for ‘America’s Team.’
JOSEPH RANDLE
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ROCKIN’ REBEL BRIAN SETZER AND HIS ORCHESTRA BY ALAN SCULLEY ALANLASTWORD@GMAIL.COM
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Russ Harrington
INTERVIEW
Brian Setzer is a familiar face and name to most. Back in 1979 he fronted the rockabilly band The Tomcats before heading to London and soon the band became known as the Stray Cats. The new name came about as a suggestion from bassist Lee Rocker since at that point they were living as ‘strays.’ By the mid-80s the Stray Cats were a household name in America and found success with their album Built for Speed which yielded two Top 10 hits “Rock This Town” and “Stray Cat Strut.” In the 90s, Setzer formed The Brian Setzer Orchestra and his Christmas albums and tours became immensely popular. Setzer and his orchestra are still rocking it and touring. Be sure to catch their performance at The Allen Event Center on Dec. 11. It’s been 10 years since Brian Setzer released a holiday album, but he’s broken the streak with the October release of Rockin’ Rudolph.
Adding a third album of Christmas songs is making it harder than ever for Setzer to settle on a set list.
Recorded with his 18-piece “orchestra,” the new album features 12 songs consisting mostly of Christmas classics re-imagined in Setzer’s distinctive swinging big-band-with-a-bit-ofrockabilly style.
Sing” with some serious swing, a tastefully rocked up “Carol of the Bells,” a jazzy and brassy “The Most Wonderful Time of the Year” and a version of “Here Comes Santa Claus” that could be called “jazzabilly.” He and the orchestra also turned “Joy To The World” into a vibrant instrumental romp that got renamed “Swingin’ Joy” and crafted a snazzy girl group-styled version of the wintertime standard “Little Jack Frost.”
Despite the long gap between holiday albums, it’s not like Rockin’ Rudolph was part of any predetermined plan or any urgency Setzer felt to resume his series of Christmas albums.
But perhaps the most creative song on the album is a reworking of the theme song from the cartoon series, The Flintstones. It has new holiday season lyrics and new title, “Yabba-Dabba Yuletide.”
“I don’t know, the bug just bit me,” Setzer said in a recent interview, suggesting how spontaneously the idea of making the album germinated. “What happened was I did that version of ‘Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer’ (retitled “Rockabilly Rudolph” on the album). I was fooling around at a sound check and I started playing that E minor riff and I started singing ‘Rudolph the red nosed reindeer’ in that minor key. That’s how all this stuff starts. It always starts with my guitar riff, and rockabilly is my springboard. That’s always where I jump off of. And I thought ‘Oh that’s cool. No one’s ever done that.
Like “Rockabilly Rudolph,” the idea for the song came out of nowhere.
Setzer fans know that whatever songs make the set, they’ll have a rousing good time at his shows. That seems obvious now. But success was hardly a sure thing when the singer/guitarist decided to form the Brian Setzer Orchestra.
“ ‘Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer’ is a nice little kind of country song. I’ll make it rockabilly, you know, Rudolph’s got an attitude now. Those things snowballed and all of a sudden I kept writing and kept writing and going ‘Wow, this is cool.’ Then you’ve got a song.”
“Because The Flintstones theme is a piece of jazz. It’s a beautiful little written thing. And it’s a hit. Everybody knows it. So I said I’ve got to stay up and finish that, and I wrote all those words.”
Setzer, who came to fame when his rockabilly trio, the Stray Cats, scored a major hit with their 1982 album, Built for Speed, soon started thinking about what other holiday songs might be ripe for reinvention. He found there were plenty of classic Christmas songs he had yet to try adapting to the big band format. Before he was done, Setzer’s selections included an instrumental take on “Hark, The Herald Angels
“I was in Paris, jet lagged, laying up in bed at three o’clock in the morning. I was wide awake,” Setzer said. “And I don’t know how these things happen. I call it the little song bird, he came to visit. And I started singing (The Flintstones signature melody) in the middle of summer, laying in bed, ‘Merry, merry Christmas/and a happy holiday to you.’ I don’t know why that came into my head. And I said ‘Oh man, that’s so catchy.’
The songs on Rockin’ Rudolph give Setzer and his full orchestra – expanded to 18 members with the addition of piano – some fresh songs to play on their annual holiday tour. As in past years, this year’s show figures to be pretty evenly split between Christmas songs and material from Setzer’s various non-seasonal catalog, going back to the Stray Cats.
“Yikes, it gets hard because I change it (the set list) every year, but I have to add new songs,” he said. “It’s so hard to drop things out because I can’t drop out ‘Rock This Town’ and ‘Jingle Bells.’ I’ve got to play those and ‘Stray Cat Strut,’ and I’ve got to play ‘Rockin’ Around The Christmas Tree.’ ”
By the early 1990s, Setzer had moved on from the Stray Cats after the trio reunited for the underrated 1992 album, Choo Choo Hot Fish. In between stints with the Stray Cats, Setzer had made a pair of well-received solo albums in the latter half of the 80s. Then he arrived at the idea of putting together his twist on the 1940s/1950s big band sound, forming a horn-accented 17-piece ensemble, with his electric guitar moving from its traditional big band role as a background rhythm instrument into the spotlight as the centerpiece of the Brian Setzer Orchestra sound. A self-titled album was released in 1994, followed by Guitar Slinger in 1996. Then the third album, 1998’s The Dirty Boogie, broke the Brian Setzer Orchestra into the mainstream. The album went top 10 behind the popular cover of the Louis Prima classic, “Jump, Jive and Wail.” Considering the timing and the expense of taking such a large ensemble on the road, Setzer feels he beat the odds with the orchestra.
“What was popular in ’93? Grunge, it was Kurt Cobain. I mean, there’s no way that thing should have gotten off the ground, especially with 17 people.”
“There’s no way it should have worked. There’s no way,” Setzer said. “You gotta think about taking a big band out (on tour), what was popular in ’93? Grunge, it was Kurt Cobain. I mean, there’s no way that thing should have gotten off the ground, especially with 17 people. It’s ridiculous. I just knew it was so good musically. “It was like a toddler wobbling, come on, you can make it,” he said. “And it just kept growing and growing. Slowly, it kept getting bigger and bigger. Every time I brought it out, more people came.” Then a few years later, the Brian Setzer Orchestra started building a lucrative niche with Christmas music. But it’s not like entering the Christmas market was some calculated business plan. It all began with a call from the producers of the Arnold Schwarzenegger movie, Jingle All The Way. “The producers had called me up and said ‘Hey, Brian, would you take a stab at doing ‘Jingle Bells’ with the big band?’ ” Setzer explained. “And I thought ‘Yeah, hell yeah.’ It’s a jump blues song. It’s just a blues song. So I’ll make that my own and I’ll give it back to you. So I did it and they loved it. And just for that movie alone, I think I did four tracks. I did one with Lou Rawls, I did one with Darlene Love. They kept asking me to do another.” Setzer picked up from there with the first holiday album with the orchestra, 2002’s Boogie Woogie Christmas, followed by Dig That Crazy Christmas in 2005. Along the way, the Brian Setzer Orchestra launched its first tour and has been making the tours an annual tradition for a dozen years. Setzer is more than happy to be able to take the orchestra on the road each holiday season. “I love that tour. I hope that never goes away,” he said. “Not only is it profitable and everybody gets a good paycheck, but it’s just a beautiful sound. People light up. When I see people out on my Christmas tour, they’re so happy we’re back. They love it.” WWW.BLITZWEEKLY.COM
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THREE UT O B A S THING TIFUL A BEAU N WOMA
SHELBY What are you doing or wearing that makes you feel the sexiest? I love being outdoors and near water, whether it’s snorkeling in the ocean, skiing on the lake, or fishing in the river. I’d say that’s when I feel the sexiest. If it requires a bikini the answer is “yes.” What are the qualities in a man that intrigue you the most? I am attracted to men who are intelligent, funny, and most of all, a nice smile goes a long way with me. I think humor is non-negotiable too. I love a man who can make me laugh.
OUR PEDIGREE D MAGAZINE READERS CHOICE “BEST HOT DOG” 2014 BLITZ WEEKLY BLITZIE AWARD “BEST HAMBURGER” 2014 URBAN SPOON “MOST POPULAR HOT DOG” 2013 D MAGAZINE READERS CHOICE “BEST HOT DOG” 2013 BLITZ WEEKLY BLITZIE AWARD ‘BEST HOT WINGS” 2013 DALLAS OBSERVER READERS CHOICE “BEST HOT DOG” 2013 DALLAS MORNING NEWS “BEST BURGER IN DFW” 2013 BLITZ WEEKLY “BEST SPOTS TO WATCH THE SUPER BOWL” 2013 HOW ABOUT WE “TOP DALLAS DATE SPOT” 2013 CRAVE DFW “BEST DOGS OF DALLAS” 2012 DALLAS MORNING NEWS “BEST BURGER IN DFW” 2012 DALLAS OBSERVER “BEST BURGER” 2010 DALLAS OBSERVER “BEST GREASY SPOON” 2009 DALLAS OBSERVER “BEST NACHOS” 2009 D MAGAZINE “D-BEST HAMBURGER” 2006 DALLAS OBSERVER “BEST BURGER” 2006 AOL CITY GUIDE “BEST CHEAP EATS” 2006 AOL CITY GUIDE “BEST LATE NIGHT DINING” 2005 AVID GOLFER MAGAZINE “BEST WINGS” 2004 DALLAS OBSERVER “BEST HANGOVR THERAPY” 2003 DALLAS OBSERVER “BEST HOT DOG” 2002 DALLAS OBSERVER “BEST HAMBURGER” 2002 DALLAS OBSERVER “BEST PLACE TO BUY A DOG” 2001 D MAGAZINE “BEST HANGOVER HELPER” 2001 THE MET “BEST BAR FOOD” 2000 D MAGAZINE “BEST WINGS” 2000 DALLAS OBSERVER “BEST WINGS” 1998 DALLAS OBSERVER “BEST HOT DOG” 1994 DALLAS OBSERVER “BEST WNGS” 1992
We want to ask you out on a date, how do we approach you? If a guy wanted to know how to approach me for a date I’d say don’t text and ask me out. Call me or ask me next time you see me. Be confident and make me laugh.
Jarrod Fresquez Model: Shelby Make-Up: J ai Okoli – Makeup Junkies, INC. Hair: George Graham – Makeup Junkies, INC. SMARTER, SHARPER MEN
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THE 10 BEST PLACES IN DALLAS FOR CHILI BY STEVEN DOYLE – CRAVEDFW.COM A true bowl of Texas red is near and dear to me, and I always am willing to order a bowl if found on any menu I stumble across. I am pleased to report that there are more chili offerings this year than last, and many have upped the ante in developing a perfect bowl. With temperatures dipping into freezing ranges in the coming month, what a perfect opportunity to go out and taste a bowl for yourself. We have written about the history of chili, and Dallas definitely is a large part of that. The original Tolbert’s downtown served some of the best chili that could be found on the planet. The original Chili’s, the chain that now can be found just about anywhere, opened 40 years ago this year by Larry Lavine at the now defunct Greenville Avenue and Meadow location. It served fantastic chili back in the day, with a recipe inspired by the first chili cook off in Terlingua, Texas. Dallas chef Graham Dodds makes an excellent bowl of chili, but his new restaurant has not opened yet, and looks like it may be late December before we may taste his chili again. We bring you some of the more interesting bowls of chili, and a few additional chili laden entrees. Enjoy!
Stampede 66
Stephan Pyles makes great chili, and it stands to reason that this West Texas-raised chef knows a thing or two about a perfect bowl of red. You can enjoy the Stampede chili solo, served straight from his can that looks suspiciously like Wolf Brand or as Frito Pie. Actually, it is “Freeto” pie since he makes his own corn chips in house. stampede66.com.
Katy Trail Ice House
With two locations in the Metroplex, one in Dallas and one in Plano, the Katy Trail version definitely is rich and meaty. This chili also makes for a great
SMARTER, SHARPER MEN
side dish on the weekends when the people here serve some pretty terrific barbecue. katyicehouse.com.
CBD Provision
One of our favorite restaurants in Dallas offering such illustrious fare such as a pig face (oh so good,) CBD definitely is one of the top go-to restaurants currently in Dallas. There’s also some awesome bowls of chili very thick with tender meat topped with an egg and a bit on the caustic side of heat. Delicious with a side of Chicharrones. cbdprovisions.com.
Ellen’s Southern Kitchen
Try hunting down chili on the menu at Ellen’s and you might have a difficult time. This item actually is found on the breakfast side and is served with a few eggs for good measure. This chili is a bit on the sweeter side, but packed with meat and a rich chili gravy. While at Ellen’s, try the BLTEA, which is a kicked up BLT with thick cut Texas hickory smoked bacon, crispy lettuce, tomatoes, a fried egg and avocado on multi-grain toast. This pairs very well with chili. ellenssouthernkitchen.com.
AllGood Café
All Good is as the name suggests, all very good. This is home to our favorite chicken fried steak
in Dallas and the folks here also make a fantastic bowl of chili. You can order this as a straight bowl of red, Frito pie, or as a powerful omelet ingredient. allgoodcafe.com.
recommend. The ghost peppers in this chili are tempered down quite a bit, but you still get a little of that “bite of a rattlesnake” numbness on your tongue, but it is not so spicy hot that you cannot enjoy the bowl. holygrailpub.com/fmsmokehouse.com.
Goodfriend Beer Garden Haystack Burger This is a bit of a cheat since Haystack does not and officially have chili on the menu in bowl form, Burger but you may still order the burger topping that is House house made and quite good. We’re told a bowl can Home to some very delicious burgers, beer and, of course, chili. Pull up a bar stool, apply the napkin and dig into this brick red bowl of delicious beefy chili. goodfrienddallas.com.
JaBB
Rodeo Goat
Rodeo Goat prides itself on making outrageous burgers that include the Whiskey Burger topped with Irish Whiskey Cheddar, Bourbon Candied Bacon, and a Blackberry Compote. But the chefs also make this wonderful chili that makes it all worth the drive. We do not need much motivation to enjoy Rodeo Goat. rodeogoat.com.
Holy Grail Pub/FM Smokehouse Both Holy Grail and FM Smokehouse are owned by Brian and Christi Rudolph. Besides having one amazing beer program at both locations, they can cook. The chili they offer is pretty straight forward and very good. But you also may order the ghost pepper version, which is the one we
be ordered, but off menu. haystackburgers.com.
Carnival Barker’s Ice Cream
Carnival Barker’s uses a great hot dog with a bit of snap, a poppy seed bun, and all the added toppings you might want. The best way to enjoy this dog is with chili, cheese and onion. Not sure you would need much more than that as the chili is chunky and can make this a very large bite. The people here also make their own pickled jalapenos, so you can spice it up even more. 5624 Sears Street – Dallas.
Ivy Tavern
This is home to the very best chili cheese fries. Seriously good chili cheese fries. Using a spicy homemade chili (and plenty of it) along with its own stringy pimento cheese, bacon and jalapenos. Enjoy this platter with a cold local beer. theivytavern.net.
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holiday gift guide I’m sure most of us by now already have a Christmas list written up that can cover a roll of toilet paper front and back. But that’s just too much stuff. Where are you gunna put it all? Do you really expect your friends and family to destroy the Rainforest gift wrapping all that crap? Hell no. Plus, if you are like me, you have friends who don’t celebrate Christmas so you can forget getting everything on your list no matter how hard you beg and plead with those heathens.
International Transport Forum
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Lava Comms
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All kidding aside, just because you don’t celebrate the holidays doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy the experience and uplifting feeling that comes with the act of gift giving. I wanted to write this holiday gift guide with the intention of maintaining that sappy sentimentality of the past but still end up leaving you being remembered as the Pauper of the Present during this holiday season. Let’s begin with the one thing we all want, we could all use, and the thing that always sounds so cool when revealed on any game show. A brand new car. Although not exactly in every one’s budget, a car probably is the best gift one could give besides giving a house to a homeless person. But not just any car mind you. After all, driving is work and who wants to do that during the holidays.
$2,700,000
$11,999
From RC toys to a BMW controlled by your cell phone, cars always have been fantasized in a fashion that would remove all the effort of actually driving them. That’s right, I’m talking about driverless cars. The subject of many recent news stories, Google, Ford, and Mercedes all are getting behind this wonderful idea and trying to make what used to be a thing of the future a thing of now. Maybe just slightly unreasonable to offer this up as a gift this holiday season. But if you could get your hands on one of the first ones, it undoubtedly would make for the best gift given in your office secret Santa exchange. You’re probably already labeling me a lunatic and dismissing everything I’ve already said. Fifty years from now when they will be able to print these puppies out for the cost of a dime, you can expect Santa will be outsourcing his deliveries of driverless cars to his elves as they will be at the top of everyone’s fantasy wish list. Put down that iPhone! Now throw it in the trash, and that stupid watch too. Apple users don’t prefer the basic ecosystem iOS employs, if that’s what they are telling you then they are lying or ignorant. The logo makes it clear what you are buying into: a half-eaten piece of fruit. If you are trying to claim superiority over someone, a plain old iPhone isn’t going to cut it.
$2,848 SMARTER, SHARPER MEN
Well, if you are a reasonable person and did not throw your iPhone away like I told you to, good, because there is another way you can disregard all reason and logic but still win an argument over who has the better phone, you or your friend with that Sony or Samsung. Cover that bad boy in diamonds. Yeah, you heard me, diamonds. Buy a plane ticket to the UK
and talk to this man, Alexander Amosu, world renowned luxury designer for men’s fashion and mobile devices. He can customize iPhones, Blackberrys, and even your suit with any array of gold, platinum or diamonds of your choosing. Cause if you are going to give a phone to someone as a gift, you might as well say you care by giving them one worth more than their first born. You just can’t beat a present made out of diamonds. Now, on to something slightly more affordable: 4k TVs. Chances are, whatever you are binging on at the moment whether it be Game of Thrones, Narcos, or even the new-classic Empire series, it’s going to look its best on an organic light-emitting diode screen (OLED) that’s at least 4k resolution and curved. Still considered a luxury item even by the top 1 percent of Americans and still more common in executive boardrooms, mansions, and the store shelves from which they’re sold, these high class televisions slowly are making their way into more and more hands as companies find ways to reduce their costs and increase scale production. But this wish list is only the best of the best, so go ahead and pass right on by those Vizio’s, LG’s, and Samsung’s you saw being sold on Black Friday. Labels might not be everything when it comes to electronics, but rest assured, THX certification is nothing to blink your eyes at and the only maker offering such is Panasonic. The 85-inch AX850 will cost about as much as that driverless car and even though these aren’t exactly items you can gift wrap and hand over to your secret Santa, they sure would look pretty with a big red bow attached to them. Sorry Texas Instruments, but anyone with one of these Panasonics won’t be visiting your DLP projectors at the IMAX any time soon. Short of giving that special someone these super special televisions, you always can remodel an entire section of your living quarters to be made into a personal home theater. OK, maybe you don’t need electronics. You’re probably more of a man’s man who knows your way around building one of those custom home theaters or is perhaps working on your own driverless automobile in your already custom-built garage. Well, if you stocked up on tools on Black Friday like I did, then you probably need a good place to store them all. More likely the kind of tools you employ are a bit fancier than most and you need a fancier place to keep them well protected. Check out the Westward Premium Combination Tool Chest/Cabinet by Grainger. These suckers feature 24 drawers on wheels in your choice of red, black, or for an extra grand, stainless steel. These are the Trump Towers of tool cabinets generally reserved for top-of-the-line industries and Formula-1 auto shops. They also weigh in at 650 pounds when empty, so when you get it delivered, slap one of those big red bows on top and call it a day. This thing not is only a work of art, but it’s built to last a lifetime in your garage or workshop. I don’t swear by brand loyalty except when it comes to Adidas, there are other great tool
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this list might max out your credit cards cabinets out there, just like Sony, Samsung, and LG really do make great electronics. Snap-On makes an incredible tool cabinet as well that I thought worth mentioning. For around the same price range as the Grainger, you will get a more “decked out” tool cabinet than your average one with lights, skin decals, and special editions, or double down your dollars with doublewides for double the storage capacity. Pretty sick stuff for serious professionals only. Maybe the person you are buying the gift for is the active type. Active so much that their insurance company is making a fortune off their premiums because let’s face it, with all that mountain biking and death defying, they are a bigger liability than your pipe-smoking grandpa. So they enjoy a little offroading from time to time, and who can blame them, everyone enjoys a good adventure, we’re just not all willing to risk our lives for it. The less-active may instead chose to live vicariously through another’s recorded exploits. And what better way to record these than with a GoPro, a camera small enough to take with you anywhere but the center of a volcano or the earth’s molten outer core. But why get just the camera when you can get your own photographer, well, more or less. Avoid having to worry about your tech getting as damaged as you might be if something goes wrong and have that nice expensive GoPro floating high above you in the air by a nice expensive UAV (Unmanned Aerial Vehicle), more commonly referred to as a drone. Bundles of cameras and drones are easy to find and readily available, for the right price. And that adrenaline junky is going to need that bundle. Just make sure they share their epic footage with you before they publish it on YouTube, maybe they’ll thank you in the credits. Moving on to the gift for some of the least active people – a slightly more affordable item that still requires some of the deepest of pockets - is one specifically tailored to the gamer. Your typical gamer isn’t going to be impressed by just any game disc, or game system for that matter. If you are going to gift the joy of gaming to someone, it might as well be the complete package, one they will spend more time hypnotized by than the lifetime of road hypnosis saved by owning a driverless car. PlayStation, XBOX, PC, it really don’t matter as long as you are dreading across that post-apocalyptic wasteland only found in the world of Fallout. If one gift on this list isn’t enough to break the bank and you find yourself needing to give two gifts, this would be a perfect pair if played on one of those 4k 3D OLED curved TVs. You might be thinking what’s all this going to run you, besides the $13,000 television. Well, depending on the system, the core thing you need to play on, you’re looking at anywhere between $300 and $3.000. You’re going to need multiple controllers, there’s a couple of bills, a headset – another bill or two, and the game, which of course, if you want the best, go with the collector’s
edition, always. Usually only available for pre-order before its release, any version of the game usually can be found for a price afterwards through your neighborhood auction site: eBay. In this case, try and go for the Fallout 4 Pip-boy Edition and the Mini Nuke Bundle, right now looking at half a grand to get all the good stuff. The recipient of this gift will be grateful for all the additional content. For an even more complete package, check out The Emperor LX, the ultimate gaming chair designed by Modern Work Environment Lab, sure to set you back $21,500. Live in Texas? I’ve got you covered. Last but not least on my holiday wish list is another, but different type of tool cabinet: The Browning Platinum Plus PP66 gun safe. For anyone who thinks nine grand is a drop in the bucket compared to the safety of their precious firearms, the Browning series gun safe is a perfect, decorative accent to any home, mansion, or ranch where the 2nd Amendment reigns supreme over the 1st.
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BY TAYLOR C. BERRIER @THEGALAXY89 Steve Lodefink
$2,114 RK
With the Platinum Plus, no one will claim you ill-equipped for that inevitable zombie apocalypse or that ISIS takeover of our homeland. Yes, owning one of these means bearing the responsibility of saving the world if/when it starts going up in flames, because no one will be more prepared than you. Even if you don’t own guns or maybe just own one little pistol, doesn’t mean you don’t need this safe. It holds the industry’s highest standard of fire resistant materials and can keep your roommates, you know the ones, the ones with a complete lack of restraint, from jacking all your Twinkies or Cheetos. It’s even the perfect gift to store another perfect gift inside of it: guns. So, guns aren’t the greatest invention in the world, but one can’t deny the artistic value many hold to these finely crafted pieces of metal. Just don’t let yourself get locked inside one of these.
$119
I realize this list walks a fine line of insanity when it comes to its price tags, but don’t think for a minute there aren’t more budget-conscious items out there on sale this holiday season that every guy would love to get his hands on regardless of it not being the most expensive version of that item. When it comes right down to it, it really is the thought that counts. But the thing is, most of us capitalists are thinking of the best possible version of what we want and narrow down our options as we compromise from there. We learn how much we are willing to settle as we consider the pros and cons of renting, leasing, and buying new this holiday season.
$21,500
Does it really matter if you snag that discounted, store display model or that re-gifted, open-boxed item you found from a third-party seller? It might just depend on who you are gifting. But a little secret, it’s really about showing them that you cared enough to gift them in the first place. It says, “Hey, someone is thinking about you and you should feel special because of that.” So gift whatever you can afford to gift, if not a TV, then a book perhaps. If not the GoPro Hero4 Black, then maybe a lens kit for smartphones. I think you get the picture…
$8,629 WWW.BLITZWEEKLY.COM
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BIGGIE AND TUPAC The True Story
BY PETER GERSTENZANG – @HAPPYSPAPPY As most people know, there are some truly haunting mysteries in the world of rock music. Things like, how bad was Bob Dylan’s motorcycle accident anyway? Why did Mick Taylor really leave The Stones? And, is it true that Vince Neil of Mötley Crüe actually sang on-key one night? Still, for many, the unsolved murders of Biggie Smalls and Tupac Shakur are at the top of the mystery list. Were cops involved in the killing? Gang members? Were both guys actually okay until they were treated by Ben Carson? As a hard-hitting music journalist, I’ve recently dug up some explosive evidence about this terrible and remarkably unimportant crime. There’s a particularly large amount of speculation about the murder of Tupac. The popular theory is that Biggie put a hit on him after the two men had a falling out. Maybe because Tupac made remarks about Biggie’s wife on a record that were so sexist, they were nearly used as a campaign song by Donald Trump. Others think it’s because Pac kept saying his old friend wasn’t really from the streets. And the closest he came was playing Rerun on the TV show What’s Happening? After much digging, I’ve uncovered the source of the anger here. Pac asked Biggie to have dinner with him. Biggie agreed. Then he insisted on the All You Can Eat Special at Sizzler. Pac had to hit the ATM three times and still couldn’t pay the bill. He finally pretended to go to the men’s room and never came back leaving Biggie to come up with the balance of $3,000. Things were never the same between them again. If you dismiss The Sizzler Theory, many now believe that Tupac was killed not by Biggie, but SMARTER, SHARPER MEN
by rap mogul Suge Knight. The man with the puckish smile and elfin charm of the young Gary Coleman. Originally it was thought that Knight had him whacked because Pac insisted on being paid. Knight may indeed have had Shakur knocked off. But not for the obvious reasons. Knight could live with the claims of millions in unpaid royalties. But when Pac asked Suge for a dollar for a pack of Skittles, he snapped. It’s always the little things. As for Biggie’s murder, it’s more complicated. As you know the plus-sized rapper went out to L.A. not long after Tupac’s killing. Which is like Osama Bin Laden going into a Tel Aviv Taco Bell to celebrate 9/11. Maybe you’re guilty, maybe not. But you’re not going to get a warm reception, regardless. Sure, it’s possible that Suge Knight blew out Biggie’s birthday candles. But this is L.A., Tupac’s home, we’re talking about. Last time I checked with the police, they said they had 300,000 suspects. And were only up to the letter “P.” Finally, there’s the crazy theory that both rappers are still alive and working together. And that they’ve been working on a family-friendly project. One expert suggested they’re redoing classic Gangsta rap songs without the violence and profanity. But with one hitch. They’ve recorded 30 songs so far and their album is still only six minutes long. Some say they’ve launched a line of sneakers. But the most plausible theory is their plan to remake a classic comedy that’s PG13. Yep, watch for Biggie and Tupac, coming soon, in Abbott and Costello Meet the Invisible Man. That’s right. You heard it here first.
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THE BUR DEN OF
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BY CHRIS SICK – @CHRISSICK
free speech
Whatever else may be difficult about writing this column, there is a certain dreadful reliability in knowing that I will never want for material. Month in and month out I can rest easy knowing that my country will never fail to disappoint.
The greatest challenge is in keeping the content relevant, taking from an ongoing controversy, meaningful insights that extend beyond it. Because I know that in the time between meeting deadline and publication, some fresh outrage will have displaced whatever headline to which I’m reacting. As I write this, students at the University of Missouri and Yale University have demanded recognition and administrative response to their claims that there is endemic prejudice on their campuses, occasionally boiling over into overt racial hostility. Students have disrupted the normal business of campus and at the University of Missouri, they’ve achieved one of their goals when UM President Tim Wolfe resigned. The national attention focused on these campus protests largely has failed to engage with, or even recognize, the concerns of these protestors. Instead, grown adults – from across the political spectrum – have decided to engage in hyperbolic handwringing about the imminent threat to free speech embodied in a young undergraduate shouting and cursing at an administrator.
If this is all news to you, you should go and read the stories for yourself, consider the opinions – and the voices offering them – carefully. It would take more columns than I’ve written to detail and adjudicate the complaints of students. And since I’m not a student, faculty, or administrator on either campus, I’m not sure I’ve got the local knowledge and standing to do so. Not that that has stopped commentators on the left and the right from outright ignoring those complaints and concerns. Instead, they have refocused the conversation on the actions of a few and declared the entire affair to be emblematic of the inherently antidemocratic tendencies of campus political correctness.
I’ve written about political correctness before, and won’t pretend I came to any deeply meaningful conclusions. The truth is that the U.S. is struggling with the creation of a truly pluralistic, multicultural society that it’s long paid lip service to. And the road there will be messy and fraught with demands for recognition
of injustices systemic and personal, balanced against the need for free and open discourse.
And this might be a useful time for a helpful caveat – I am an opinion writer literally hoping to eke out a living pedaling unpopular opinion. No one needs to tell me about the value in speech, or that threats to it frequently come not from government, but a chilling effect encouraging self-censoring for fear of informal censure. But such concerns shouldn’t be used to justify ignoring the complaints of the students themselves and dismissing them as spoiled kids demanding protection from offensive ideas. Further right, many conservatives are busy insisting that purported racist incidents are hoaxes, even as more racist incidents and threats pile up and protests spread nationwide. Instead of operating under the assumption that the protestors are actually adults – able to decide for themselves what matters and what doesn’t, to demand institutional recognition of
“MAYBE WE COULD FIND OUR WAY TO REALIZING THAT IT IS OUR WORDS THAT SHAPE OUR WORLD”
It’s an old tactic. The demand that terms of the debate favor the status quo is one way to protect it from challenge. Instead of recognizing students as, fundamentally, engaged in speech demanding institutional change, commentators contort themselves to see the traditional methods and aims of student activism as new threats to an imagined marketplace of ideas where everyone gets a fair hearing. The truth is that public discourse is messy, it is difficult, and it rarely leads to agreement. Instead of articulating abstract principles about the necessity of protecting even offensive speech, critics could do the hard work of actually addressing students’ concerns about prejudice on campus, lack of diversity, and administrative indifference. But cheap laughs and outraged reactions are easier. When a grown adult insists that student activism they disagree with justifies denying students the vote, it’s hard to take it as a spirited defense of discourse. Instead of empty platitudes, maybe we could recognize that free speech is so incredibly important because of exactly how powerful it is. Instead of articulating a defense that rests on the supposed hypersensitivity of students, maybe we could find our way to realizing that it is our words that shape our world. And everyone doesn’t experience this world equally.
As I’m about to accuse virtually an entire class of opinion writers of being intellectually dishonest, I should probably do my level best to avoid the exact same thing. There have been reports and videos of protestors at both campuses crossing the line between militant protest into threats and physical intimidation.
Words have power; it is why they’re worth defending. But an empty appeal to the marketplace of ideas won’t fix deeply systemic failings. Addressing those concerns and the protestors who are pushing those issues could be a start. A demand to respect the principles of speech could stand to be accompanied by actual respect for speech, and a response that extends beyond next month’s media cycle.
It should go without saying that such actions deserve universal condemnation, and they’ve largely received it. But it takes a special sort of view to insist – before the above even occurred – that the aforementioned undergraduate represents a dangerous and imminent threat to free speech. The student, gleefully identified by conservative media, is reportedly receiving death threats. For the record, in the hierarchy of threats to speech, I’d generally rank death threats over protests, boycotts, and loudly shouted cuss words.
their concerns at their schools, and able to face the consequences of their actions – many in the media are insisting the only story here is how awful are today’s kids.
HonestReporting WWW.BLITZWEEKLY.COM
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Sundays in December
THE LEGEND LIVES ON速 SMARTER, SHARPER MEN
Huntington Theatre Company
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Bits of Wisdom…Nick Offerman Figure out what you love to do, then figure out how to get paid to do it. Never half-ass two things, whole-ass one thing. I’m opposed to a lot of the time that we as a civilization have come to spend looking at screens. For my money, life is much delicious damn near everyplace but inside that screen. The world is split into two halves: the bacon, and the bacon eaters. If you want to be happy in life, consider yourself a student. Every day of your life, think: how can I improve?
Sagittarius: November 22-December 21 Season’s greetings! Your new biopic will warm the hearts of many with several laughs, especially the hilarious ending. Capricorn: December 22-January 19 Your performance in the bedroom is comparable to Dragon Ball Z. While that should be an accomplishment for you it means lots of screaming and shouting that ultimately leads to nothing. Aquarius: January 20-February 18 Keep asking yourself why you can’t find a “Nice Girl,” the signs are obvious to everyone else.
Andrew J. Hewett chewednews.blogspot.com SHE SHOULD SUE HERSELF Robin Earnest of Saline County, Ark., was attending Malvern College when she broke two fingers while playing musical chairs. She then demanded the state of Arkansas pay her $75,000, saying she was compelled to participate to earn class credit; and the state should pay her for surgeries, physical therapy, mental and emotional distress. Last heard, no ruling had been reached.
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NO WAY TO DIE TWICE While most dead people are embalmed and buried or cremated, a pregnant 16-year-old, Neysi Perez, of La Entrada, Honduras, was not. Strangely, there was no known cause of death and, soon after burial, mourners heard the girl scream from inside her tomb. This caused family and friends to frantically smash into the concrete container, and the teen was rushed to a hospital. Sadly, they were too late, she was returned to the cemetery and reburied. REALLY DUMB TIMES TWO Vermont police stopped Erik Polite, 35, after clocking him doing 106 miles per hour. And, while he did a breathalyzer test, which he flunked, his passenger, Leeshawn Baker, 34, who also was later determined drunk, hopped into the driver’s seat and took off. Driving in reverse, he crossed two lanes of traffic and slammed into the median. (Found inside their car: 79 oxycodone pills, 50 Percocet pills and marijuana.)
Pisces: February 19-March 20 It’s cool that everyone is nice to you but just remember it’s only because of the strong Columbine vibes you give off daily.
Gemini: May 21-June 21 Don’t worry, your dad making you wear a dress and sit on all your uncles’ laps every poker night as a kid is perfectly normal. Like in Alabama and stuff.
Virgo: August 23-September 22 One of your best skills is dodging, but only when it’s knowledge being dropped.
Aries: March 21-April 19 Your sex tape would look a lot like the movie Castaway, but instead of a volleyball, it would be a cantaloupe you’ve had in a slow cooker.
Cancer: June 22-July 22 Your Facebook posts about how happy you are not having kids aren’t fooling anyone, we all see how salty you are and that no one wants to procreate with you.
Libra: September 23-October 22 Only you can make Atheists and Christians come to an agreement, but it’s on how shitty of a person you truly are.
Taurus: April 20-May 20 People don’t like you and it’s nothing in particular, you just have one of those faces. Not bitch face, just a face that makes people go “Fuck that guy.”
Leo: July 23-August 22 “All life is precious” was said before you were born. Keep telling yourself it’s just a coincidence that it has lost its meaning since you arrived on this planet.
Scorpio: October 23-November 21 Next week’s experiment with autoerotic asphyxiation will teach you a lesson that it is indeed possible to take things too far. WWW.BLITZWEEKLY.COM
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Tales of an Uber Dallas Driver
BY JAMES GRAHOVAC @BLITZWEEKLY
I Brand Development and Creative Marketing 469-877-1533 info@culture-hype.com
remember sitting on the couch on a Friday night back in August scrolling through Facebook on my phone. That’s what you do on a Friday night when you’re married and you’ve put the kids to bed. No more hitting the bar scene, pounding shots and raising hell. That’s all behind me now. So back to the couch, as I scrolled through Facebook, I saw a post from my best friend, he mentioned that he made some beer and pizza money driving for Uber. This piqued my interest. He has a great paying job so why is he driving for Uber? The next day, I texted him and he explained that the ridesharing gig was something he had just started to do to make some extra money. I welcomed the idea to make some extra cash on the side. Supplemental income is the appropriate nomenclature.
Uber 101 To participate and work as an independent contractor for Uber you have to apply. You go online and submit the paperwork. The people there execute a background check to make sure you’re not a serial killer or on the lamb. Uber also wants to make sure you have a reliable vehicle that is a 2006 model or newer with four doors. You then watch some training videos and download the driver Uber app. If you make it through this process within seven business days you’ll be asked for your banking information to compensate you for your services. Oh, and you have to have a smart phone to utilize the app to ferry passengers to and fro. In Dallas and some of the other surrounding cities you should have a permit for your vehicle. Recently DFW Airport and Love Field approved Uber drivers to pick up and drop off passengers. Again you have to have the right permits to make this happen. It’s really simple.
SMARTER, SHARPER MEN
your day going? Followed by my favorite: Do you do this full time? I answer their questions professionally but laugh to myself about the fulltime question. Driving for Uber is an opportunity to make some extra cash but I would not recommend it as a full-time gig since you cannot count on it to earn consistent income. Every now and then, I’ll have a passenger ask me to describe some of my “horror stories” as if they take delight in hearing the worst part of someone’s job. I wonder what would happen if I tried that anywhere else. Say a teller at Bank of America, the cook at Whataburger or a bartender at some bar.
The Pros I can honestly say that there are several perks about being an Uber driver. First off, I am an independent contractor. I work whenever I feel like it. No schedule to follow except my own. No one asking for TPS reports in triplicate. No uniform. No time cards. No boss. I make my own decisions and have to live with them. Between rides, I can run errands, listen to what I like in my ride or take a break. If I don’t feel like working, I log off and I’m free. As mentioned earlier, Uber will direct deposit your earnings and so far it’s always delivered. I am happy with Uber. Every now and then a passenger will give you a cash tip which is nice, but shouldn’t be expected. One thing I should mention here is the doubleedged sword known as “Surge.” This is a basic supply and demand effect that causes fares to increase when there are more passengers requesting rides than there are drivers to accommodate them in a certain area. The positive for the driver is that with the increase in fare, earnings increase. The passenger has to sign off on the “Surge Price” before the driver can begin the trip. Everyone is in the know.
Common Questions
The Cons
Now that I have been driving for a few months, typically the first thing a passenger will ask is: How long have you been driving? Next up: How’s
The negative for the driver regarding “Surge Pricing” can be passenger complaints or a passenger with less than a pleasant demeanor.
Additionally, as an independent contractor there isn’t a guarantee that the hours worked will be compensated. Short rides equal low fares and a lot of wear and tear on your vehicle. Also Uber with its cashless system has everything based on credit cards. The apps do not promote tipping. Uber also takes a 20 percent cut off the top of all fares. So when Uber lowers fares, the company is in fact lowering driver compensation. Don’t have a smart phone? Uber will hook you up for a $10 per week rental. Don’t have a vehicle? If you qualify, Uber will help you lease a ride for $250 a week. Lastly, most passengers are not aware that Uber drivers have to maintain their own vehicle maintenance and pay for their own gas.
The Tales I won’t go into all of them but here are some of the highlights: two gay men making out in the backseat while I drove them home. Two lesbians who didn’t make out and passed out while I drove them home. The heterosexual couple who made out while I drove them home. The douche bag who asked me to take him to Taco Bell and argued with the cashier about not serving breakfast at 1 a.m. The pimp who had me deliver his girl to a private party. The couple who had an argument about leaving the bar too early on a Friday night. The countless times that I showed up to pick up a passenger who canceled due to surge and not being compensated for my time and effort.
Riding Off into the Sunset There are more and more Uber drivers operating in the Dallas market. Unless the number of passenger requests continues to grow, then fares will remain stagnant. Good for the passengers and not so good for the drivers. I do enjoy driving for Uber and will continue to do so, let’s just hope the services continue to be marketed to the public to help grow customer base. If that happens, everyone wins, Uber, drivers and passengers.
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