Blitz Weekly

VOL. 3 - ISSUE 6

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BLITZ News Shorts Hollywood Profile/Movie Review Music: Interview With Dave Ellefson TCU/SMU/UNT Previews Dallas Stars Season Preview Cowboys Previews COVER STORY: Rangers Playoff Preview Ghosts Of Postseasons Past Catching Up With Craig Monroe Rangers Take On The Rays BLITZ BABE: AJ The Online Dating Quagmire Food Review: Thai Soon Blitz Toys Crossword / Jokes / Horrorscopes Last Call: Socking It To The Sox

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PUBLISHER Kelly G. Reed EDITOR Jeff Putnam CREATIVE DIRECTOR / WEBSITE / GRAPHIC DESIGN Damien William Mayfield COVER Cover Photography: Matt Pearce Cover Design: Damien William Mayfield STAFF PHOTOGRAPHERS Darryl Briggs, Gregg Case, Nathaniel Chadwick, Steven Hendrix, Matt Pearce, Jason Ryan, Ed Westerman CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS Stephanie Cabral, Ed Fitzgerald, Manny Flores, Kevin Jacobson, Steven Leija, Joe Lorenzini, Eddie Trevizo, Heng Wang STAFF WRITERS Tony Barone, Geoff Case, Sam Chase, Vivian Fullerlove, Robin George, Eric Kendall, Frank LaCosta, Pat Moran, Richard S. Pollak, Jennifer Wayne and Jesse Whitman CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Joe Avezzano, Jay Betsil, Kris Boudreau, Bronte Erwin, Dennis Hambright, Andrew J. Hewett, Jason Miller, H. Todd J. Moore ADVERTISING SALES MANAGER Kelly G. Reed CONTACT US MAIN NUMBER 214-529-7370 FAX NUMBER 972-960-8618 kreed@blitzweekly.com BLITZ Weekly P.O. Box 295293, Lewisville, TX 75029

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QUOTE OF THE WEEK “It’s special for me, but more special for the players, that fans can see that these guys are champions.”

— Ron Washington

Police: Judge hands out condoms hidden in acorns

Police said a district judge from Intercourse, Pa., hid condoms inside acorns and handed them out to women in the state Capitol complex last week. A summary charge of disorderly conduct was filed Tuesday against Isaac H. Stoltzfus, who presides over low-level cases as a district judge in Lancaster County.

The citation from Capitol Police said the 58-year-old jurist gave the acorns to unsuspecting women, who were offended when they discovered the contents.

Stoltzfus’ office referred questions to defense attorney Heidi Eakin, who didn’t immediately return a phone message Wednesday.

Denver firefighters battle flames, fleeing bedbugs

Denver firefighters ran into more than the normal hazards at a house fire. Crews responding to the blaze Wednesday also had to battle bedbugs, the bloodsucking insects quickly becoming the scourge of households and businesses across the country.

Lt. Phil Champagne of the Denver Fire Department tells The Denver Post that firefighters had to be decontaminated after going into an attic where items were infested with bedbugs.

The bugs scurried away from the flames and latched on to firefighters’ equipment and gear. Some of the gear had to bagged so the bugs wouldn’t get a free ride to the firehouse.

There were no injuries, but the home was declared uninhabitable.

Andrew J. Hewett

www.chewednews.com

MEXICO MADNESS: A PREVIEW OF NORTH AMERICA’S FUTURE?

The Associated Press reported from Ciudad Juarez, Mexico, September 11, 2010, that while drug gangs shot and murdered 25 people in one day in that town, 85 inmates down the road in Reynosa decided to begin life anew by climbing over their prison’s walls, apparently with no problem. (Number of drug-related murders in Mexico since 2007? Estimates well exceed 28,000.)

GOOD THING HE DIDN’T EXPECT A DENVER OMLETTE WITH MUSHROOMS!

Man to spend Christmas in jail for next 5 years

A judge running for the state Supreme Court has given a man accused of assaulting a woman a sentence with an unusual twist.

District Court Judge Nels Swandal gave Daniel Martz a 10-year suspended sentence on Monday for a May 2009 attack in which Martz allegedly choked and hit a woman, and then tried to have her change her story.

Swandal also ordered Martz to report to jail each Dec. 15 through Jan. 1 for the next five years, according to the Livingston Enterprise.

Swandal said incarcerating Martz around the holidays will keep him out of trouble.

Park County Attorney Brett Linneweber said Martz’s arrest record shows he has gotten into trouble before during holidays.

Swandal is running against Helena attorney Beth Baker to fill the seat of retiring Justice William Leaphart.

September 12, 2010, The Associated Press reported from Jackson, Mississippi, 47year-old Stanley Neace may have overreacted when his wife, Sandra Neace, 54, served him cold eggs for breakfast. Instead of heating them in his microwave, Stanley followed his wife next door, where he shared his disgust with Sandra’s daughter, Sandra R. Strong, 28; and neighbors Dennis Turner, 31; Teresa Fugate, 30; and Tammy Kilborn, 40, by shotgun-murdering all five, then taking his own life an hour later, on his own front porch; destroying any hope of him enjoying an early lunch by at least 100%.

COULDN’T “TAKE TWO ASPIRIN AND CALL HERSELF IN THE MORNING”

According to national news services, September 1, 2010, from Bakersfield, Calif., Dr. Jacquelyn Kotarac, 49, was having such a troubled relationship with her boyfriend, she decided to slide down his chimney in order to confront him. Problem was, “to avoid a confrontation” her lover had already left, meaning no one heard her screams, and her decomposing body was not found stuck above his fireplace until three days later.

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HOLLYWOOD PROFILE with Katherine Heigl

by: Vivian Fullerlove “Entertainment’s Real Critic”

And baby makes three…Katherine Heigl and Josh Duhamel become instant parents when they are named the caretakers of their friends’ baby after their unexpected death. This sounds tragic, but Life as We Know It is actually a new dramatic comedy that hits theatres next week.

We caught up with Heigl, who also executiveproduced the movie, to talk about the film and what it was like co-starring with Mr. Fergalicious himself!

What attracted you to this project?

I am a very romantic comedy girl. I go see every one of them that is in the theatre. I have real fondness for them, but I was ready to tell a story that had a little more soul to it, that wasn’t simply about these two lead characters who go through this funny situation and end up together in the end. I don’t want to trivialize that because I love that, but this script came from the story of a real tragedy where two people were just thrown into a situation where they had to rise to the challenge and do the right thing.

TELL US A LITTLE ABOUT THE FILM? Essentially the movie is about two people whose mutual friends die in a car accident.

Their one-year-old daughter, now an orphan, has been left in the care of my character and Josh Duhamel’s character.

But THEY’RE NOT MARRIED or even a couple, right?

They have a history with one another. Years ago their friends had set them up on a blind

date that went bad. Not just uncomfortable or they didn’t connect—they hate one another.

Still, they’ve had to be in each other’s lives for the past three years because their best friends are married. Then they’re thrown into this situation—really difficult for them at first. They’re dealing with the loss of the two most important people in their lives, and they sort of grow to become partners in raising this baby. By the end of the movie, they’ve realized they are perfect for each other and bring out the best in each other.

Why Josh Duhamel for your co-star? What drew you to him for the role?

I’ve always loved his work, and known he was a really good person. I just thought I’d love to work with him on this and that he’d make a great Messer. Originally the character was written as a kind of messy, scruffy, baseball cap, t-shirt and jeans guy. You think of Josh Duhamel, and he’s pretty polished and goodlooking. I just thought “I know he can be that guy.” I knew he could do it, and I was really excited about him getting this part.

Why should people go and see Life as We Know It? I think this movie will move people. I think it has all those beats, and I hope people will come and experience it with us. That was the point: to tell a story that people can relate to.

Life as We Know It opens nationwide this week. The film is rated PG-13 for sexual material, language and some drug content.

by: H. Todd J. Moore “Freelance Hubrist”

DEVIL M. Night Shyamalan keeps making passably good movies. Not spectacular, but certainly good enough to see and not feel like you wasted your time or money. Devil is no exception.

To enjoy Devil, you need to let go and just ride with it. Pay attention, which goes for all of Shyamalan’s films, and for all good films.

While the film contains suspense, passably good acting, and some slightly frightening scenes, we are not subjected to a relentless thrill ride. Suspense builds, the mystery thickens, but we are not mesmerized.

We get to think our way through things.

What got me was the texture. It felt like the Mid-Atlantic. I felt the gray, rainy, thick Philadelphia skies, downtown skyscrapers, city traffic – the presence of life as we know it. This was my city as I experienced the film.

The basic plot is simple: Events leading from a suicide lead to five people entering an elevator, one of which is the Devil, who brings final terror and torture to the souls to be claimed. The protagonist, Police Detective Bowden, is a recovering alcoholic who had lost his family five years before the events in the film.

What is amazing is the lack of truly human horror or anything deeply shocking in the film. Five people in an elevator – one

would think that they might be truly, deeply, amazingly depraved in order to deserve a visit by the Devil. But no, it’s only ordinary evil, such as picking pockets, blackmail, Ponzi schemes, or one really devastatingly bad mistake, that brings out Old Scratch. I suggest you watch your speeding, and maybe let someone merge into your lane on the way home.

Of course, dealing with troubled people in confined quarters is bad enough for anyone – a hell on Earth of sorts. Some French philosopher said “Hell is other people,” and I got a taste of that here.

Shyamalan keeps things from going too far in any one direction – it’s not too scary, not too shocking, and a good film, in the end, to ponder. We’re not taken to any grandiose heights or shocking depths. We could have been – we hear and feel things here and there, but most of the terror occurs off-screen, in the dark, leaving us to wrestle with the aftermath.

Finally, it’s somewhat amazing that a film named Devil can lead one to believe that we are going to walk away with all of our senses and sensibilities shaken or rattled, and then have the final effect of hope, salvation, and the possibility of human redemption. I suspect the individual after whom the film was named may get a little upset about that.

And that’s OK.

FALL INDIE FEST

Fall Indie Fest is a celebration of independent film and music coming to downtown Grand Prairie in October 2010. The event will serve as a competition to both recognize and reward independent filmmakers and musicians from throughout the great state of Texas. The three-day festival will include screenings of full-length short films and concerts by artists from all genres. Screenings and concerts will begin Friday, October 8, 2010. The festival will culminate on October 10, 2010 with a reception and announcement of winners at the city’s historic Uptown Theater. The event will feature a special guest screening of “Swept Away” by filmmaker Mark Finkelpearl, who is currently launching a US business for Eyeworks Cuatro Cabezas. Finkelpearl’s current projects include TLC’s hit “DC Cupcakes,” and the upcoming “AmeriGuns” for National Geographic Channel. Finkelpearl has produced or executive produced 750 + hours of commercial television for networks ranging from A&E to History to Planet Green. He’s been responsible for millions upon millions of dollars worth of TV, including such series as “American Chopper” & “American Hotrod” for Discovery Channel. He was on the team that launched “The World Poker Tour” on Travel Channel, creating a new vanguard in televised poker. Fall Indie Fest will also feature a musical line up of some of Texas’ most exciting new bands, one of which will walk away with a recording contract from Dallas’ Kirtland Records. For tickets log onto www.fallindiefest. com or call 972-237-8111.

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5 by: Jason Miller “Music Enthusiast”

Wed 10/6 Texas Hold ‘Em

Thur 10/7 Sizzle and Chill

Sunset Lounge - Dallas $4 u-call-its and $4 pizzas. Doors open 9 p.m. until 2 a.m. 21 and up welcome.

Fri 10/8 Fall Indie Fest

Uptown Theater - Grand Prairie Fall Indie Fest provides a showcase for independent films and unsigned bands from Texas. Any Texas resident is welcome to enter. Kirtland Records will award the first-place band with a record contract and the winner of the independent films production will see their film on the big screen! For more information, call 972-237-8786.

Sat 10/9 International Bar-B-Que Cookoff

ones that I like. Christmas-time is one of my favorites because that’s when all the really good baking starts to happen. I’ve got a lot of really good recipes that my mom used to make, a lot of cookies and various things like that. So I love when Christmas comes around. I start baking in early December and I bake a lot of things for friends and show up at their houses at Christmas parties bearing gifts of stuff I baked.”

With all that talk about baking I thought it only proper to get back to Megadeth and ask about new music. Ellefson responded enthusiastically: “We’ve actually started writing some new material and cataloging some ideas away and writing lyrics. We are in the process of creation; but the real full-on composing probably won’t happen until we are in the studio. With all this big, monumental touring we’ve done this year, we are really excited to get in. I’m thinking sometime early next year we will get that process rolling.”

Traders Village - Grand Prairie Over 100 cookers will prepare over 600 judging samples in the two days of competition. Thousands of dollars in prize money will attract BBQ cooks from across the state and beyond. The event is free to the public on both days, but you better bring $3 for parking.

Sun 10/10 Santa Fe Days on the Square

bands.” He continues, “After a while you have business to tend to, and things you want to maybe be a bit more cautious about.

Then it becomes a matter of self-preservation, not only for your career, but for your life. You can’t burn the candle at both ends like you did in your early days because that will take you down as well. I think at this point it becomes a balance of both. We are really here to play that 70-minute set. The other 22 hours and 50 minutes of our day are all focused on those 70 minutes that we are on the stage. It’s sort of like a team getting ready to play a game.”

Ellefson recently contributed to the much-anticipated upcoming Heavy Metal cookbook release entitled Mosh Potatoes. I asked him about his recipe. “I learned how to cook growing up on the farm,” Ellefson remembers. “My mother was a stay-athome mom, my dad was working full time with the business of farming, so I learned how to cook. I spent a lot of time hanging with my mom in the kitchen, if for nothing else, as a way to get out of doing brutal farm work.”

Ellefson continues, “I was downstairs in the basement playing my bass and I would come up hungry and help my mom cook. I especially helped my mom bake. For whatever reason, baking seemed to be my forte.

My wife is a really good cook; being from New Jersey, with Italian and Irish heritage, she could open the refrigerator and a huge spread would appear out of nowhere. For whatever reason I am better at following a recipe and baking; I seem to be better equipped for that mindset of being in the kitchen.”

I chimed in to ask if he has metal playing in the background during his baking episodes. He responded amusedly: “A lot of times around the house we have the food network on, which is awesome because my daughter, who is eleven, is learning how to cook and she’s really into it. She can basically make a meal for her and her older brother if she needs to.”

I asked Dave about the recipe that he submitted to be featured in Mosh Potatoes, asking if it is his favorite. “It’s one of the

Old Downtown Carrollton Come experience the sights, sounds and timehonored traditions of the Native American Community as they share their proud heritage and history. This event is free to the public.

Mon 10/11 Can-struction

Megadeth is arguably one of the greatest metal bands of all time with worldwide sales of 25 million and 8 Grammy nods.

Currently the band is on tour celebrating the 20th anniversary of their landmark metal opus Rust In Peace. I had a chance to speak to bass player and founding member Dave Ellefson about all things metal, and baking.

I always like to ask about tribute bands and what they mean to the band to which they so passionately pay homage. “There are a gazillion Megadeth tribute bands which is the ultimate honor,” says Ellefson. “There is one called Hangar 18. T.he bass player is actually a girl and she calls herself Mellefson. It’s a really sweet thing to do. Years ago when we were recording the Youthanasia record in Phoenix—we had just moved out there, me and Dave—one night we noticed there was a cover band playing half Metallica half Megadeth at one of the local clubs in town called the Mason Jar. So me and Nick Menza and Marty Friedman went out to see them and jumped up on stage and played a couple of tunes with them… Blew their mind!”

I asked what they consider to be their absolute masterpiece, their finest moment.

“A lot of the stuff off of the Rust In Peace record is probably some of the most orchestrated, I’ll say. Orchestrated not with outside instruments, but by just the four of us playing it. I think of songs like ‘Holy Wars’ for instance, everything from fast stuff, to half-time breakdowns, nylon string guitars, multiple tempo changes. ‘Holy Wars’ could be one of the quintessential masterpiece arrangements of our career.”

I asked Dave to talk about how his life is different now as opposed to earlier on in his career.

“Years ago, at the very beginning, you are going out and you got nothing to lose,” says Ellefson. “That’s the best way to start a rock band and I think you hear that in the music. You’re not tentative, you’re not timid; you go out there all guns blazing and you put everything in your life on the line.

Those (virtues) make the best rock ‘n’ roll

Silver City - Dallas Registration begins at 6 p.m. Free to play and free to enter. $4 Jack Daniel’s all night. Games run until 10 p.m.

Northpark Center - Dallas Canstruction is the most unique food drive in the world. Dallas architects and engineers fight hunger in a competition that builds 23, 10’x10’x8’ spectacular structures with cans. At the close of the event all the food will be donated to the North Texas Food Bank. It is estimated that over 100,000 pounds of food will be used in the structures.

Tue 10/12 The Toasters

Photo Courtesty: Stephanie Cabral

Megadeth Bass Guitar Man Talks Metal, Touring, and Baking?

Trees - Deep Ellum Special guest is Rude King. Doors open at 7 p.m.

For more information, visit www.treesdallas. com.

If you know of a cool event or concert coming up, send some info our way at editor@blitzweekly.com

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by: Tony Barone – “The Senior Sports Authority”

#5

TCU VS. WYOMING

Sat. Oct. 9 – 2:30PM – Amon Carter Stadium – CBS C-HD This past Saturday, TCU’s swarming defense forced two turnovers and bailed out the fifth-ranked Horned Frogs in a 27-0 win over Colorado State. On their first trip outside Texas this season the Frogs (5-0, 1-0 Mountain West) struggled early, leading just 6-0 at halftime. With two Ed Wesley touchdowns in the third quarter, TCU pulled away from the Rams (at 1-4, 0-1, heavy underdogs). But just winning isn’t enough; these days the Frogs need to win convincingly to show they’re worthy of national championship debate. Gaining a season-high 346 yards on the ground, Matthew Tucker led with 87 yards, while Wesley added 78. TCU limited the Rams to 161 total yards, recording its first road shutout of the Head Coach Gary Patterson era.

Next week, the Frogs entertain Mountain West conference foe Wyoming. The Cowboys are 2-3 with wins over Southern Utah in their opener and Toledo last week.

Last year TCU beat Wyoming 45-10 as the TCU offense gained over 500 total yards, 339 on the ground. QB Andy Dalton will be shooting for a career 35th win, the most in TCU history.

by: Frank LaCosta – “Football Fanatic”

Tulsa vs. SMU

Sat. Oct. 9 – 7PM – Gerald Ford Stadium Last week the Mustangs went down to Houston and defeated the Rice Owls easily. By the middle of the third quarter the game wasn’t in doubt. SMU won 42-31. Kyle Padron was 24 of 32 for 371 yards through the air with three TDs. He connected with senior WR Aldrick Robinson six times with a pair of TDs and 148 yards. RB Zach Line was limited to 11 touches for 45 yards and was able to find the end zone again for his fifth TD this season. This weekend the Mustangs have a home game against the Tulsa Golden Hurricane. Last week Tulsa dominated the Memphis Tigers 48-7.

They are led by junior QB G.J. Kinne, who will run on occasion but likes to spread the ball around to myriad receivers. RB Alex Singleton, though not much of a receiving threat, is a workhorse who will typically rush 12 to 15 plays per game. Look for junior WR Damaris Johnson. He is something special—one of Kinne’s favorite targets and he returns kicks.

Arkansas State vs. UNT

Sat. Oct. 9 – 6PM – Fouts Stadium The Mean Green had their hearts ripped out again this past Saturday as they had an extra point attempt blocked by the Ragin’ Cajuns with 31 seconds left in the game. North Texas was playing a day after freshman receiver Josh Rake died from injuries suffered in an automobile accident. UNT had battled back from a 28-14 deficit. Lance Dunbar rushed for 141 yards and a TD. Riley Dodge completed 22 of 31 passes for 191 yards and a pair of TDs. This is their second loss by one point this season. The Red Wolves defense is quite porous as they have yet to hold an opponent under 20 points in a game. The Arkansas State defense is ranked 107th in the nation. Look for Dunbar to set the tone in this one early while Riley Dodge continues to gain confidence as a quarterback. The Red Wolves are led by sophomore QB Ryan Aplin who has nine TDs on the season and has already amassed over 1,400 yards through the air. He seems to have pretty good rapport with junior WR Dwayne Frampton. Look for RB Derek Lawson to get around 15 touches.

Photos Courtesy: Joe Lorenzini, Steven Leija, Matt Pearce

by: Frank LaCosta – “Football Fanatic”

7 by: Richard S. Pollak

New Faces In All The Right Places

Photo Courtesy: Manny Flores

DALLASSTARS

“THAT HOCKEY GUY”

The staff of the Dallas Stars has spent the off-season adding talent to their 2010-2011 roster. “We’re really excited with the additions we’ve been able to make with our limited budget,” said Stars GM Joe Nieuwendyk. The new faces include Goaltender Kari Lehtonen (12 games, 6 wins, 4 losses, 2.81 GGA last season). Recovering from two serious back injuries, Lehtonen spent the entire off-season in Dallas in an intense training and conditioning program.

Since 1997 only Ed Belfour and newly departed Marty Turco have been the Stars’ netminders. As Lehtonen succeeds, so do the Stars.

The Stars GM added NHL veteran goalie Andrew Raycroft to back up Lehtonen. Minor Leaguer Brent Krahn is also fighting for the backup job at the end of the Stars bench with Raycroft. Lehtonen will have a great challenge ahead of him to win over the Stars fans after the unexpected departure of G Marty Turco. The Stars will have to have a breakout year to make the playoffs, as most hockey experts pick them to finish only ahead of Edmonton.

With the departure of Jere Letinen and Mike Modano, the Stars have added youth, grit and a winning attitude in former Chicago Black Hawks RW Adam Burish.

Burish will play alongside Stars Captain Brenden Morrow (20 goals, 26 assists, 46 points, 69 PIMS) on the LW and Mike Ribeiro (19 goals, 34 assists, 53 points) in old number #26’s spot. Nieuwendyk has left the door open for Letinen to return later on in the season as Jere continues to live in Dallas, where his children go to school.

Meanwhile, rumor has it that Ribeiro’s style of play does not fit into Coach Marc Crawford’s system despite his excellent stats.

The Dallas Stars top line Center Brad Richards (24 goals, 67 assists, 91 points)—5th in scoring in the entire NHL last season—along with leading goal scorer LW Loui Eriksson (29 goals to lead the

team, 42 assists, 71 points) and RW James Neal (27 goals, 28 assists, 55 points and 64 PIMS) are projected to do even better as they continue to adapt to Coach Marc Crawford’s new system.

Look for Dallas’s most exciting agitator, Steve Ott, who had a breakout year in the scoring column (22 goals) to get the most ice time of the remaining eight forwards. Ott has been playing on the RW with rookie scoring sensation Center Jamie Benn and LW Fabian Brunnstrom, who is in the final year of his free agent contract and must prove his place on the roster.

The addition of Europeans Phillip Larsen from Denmark and Severin Blindenbacher from Switzerland add unproven depth. Both Larsen and Blindenbacher need ice time to adapt to the smaller playing surfaces in the NHL. But defense is the Stars’ most urgent problem.

All-Star Stephane Robidas and Nicklas Grossman were Coach Crawford’s top defenders. Robidas scored a career-high 10 goals.

Nicklas Grossman’s strength is in front of the net but he lacks skating speed and offensive prowess. The Stars have missed a real number onetwo punch on the blueline ever since their Stanley Cup days with Derian Hatcher and Richard Matvichuk.

In the home opener the Detroit Red Wings are coming to DFW—the first game with Stars icon Mike Modano skating for an opposing team. Modano, a #1 draft pick of the original Minnesota North Stars before they moved down to Dallas, is the all-time NHL leading U.S-born scoring leader with 1459 games, 557 goals, 802 assists for 1359 points. In an exclusive interview Nieuwendyk said: ”It was the hardest decision I ever made in hockey. Many times during

the regular season Mike and I talked about this exact scenario. I’ve been there as a player not knowing when to retire. I had to make a decision for the organization and the future of the Stars…”

Nieuwendyk also talked about all the new faces in all the right places for the Stars this season.

NHL: Stars vs Devils Fri. October 8 – 6PM – Prudential Center – FSSW The first game of the regular season and it arrived sooner than you thought. No worries.

Catch all the action as the Dallas Stars visit the New Jersey Devils. How will new goalie Kari Lehtonen perform? This is the start of the second year of the Marc Crawford era. Gone are Mike Modano, Marty Turco and Jere Letinen. As they say, there are new faces in all the right places!

MLB: Rays vs. Rangers Sat. October 9 – 4:07PM – Rangers Ballpark – TBS If you can’t scrounge up a ticket on the cheap then you might as well head down to the local sports bar to catch this one. The Rays send out Matt Garza who went 15-10 on the regular season with a 3.91 ERA. The Rangers will have Colby Lewis pitching. He owns a 12-13 record with a 3.72 ERA. The Ballpark will be rocking and Vlad the Impaler knows what he needs to do.

College Football: (23) Florida St. vs (13)Miami Sat. October 9 – 7PM – Sun Life Stadium – ABC A classic matchup between two storied programs that are trying to reclaim national prominence. Each team comes in with a nonconference loss and the winner of this one will be in the driver’s seat for the ACC conference title. The two schools do not have much love for each other so we will be privy to some great hits and crazy taunts.

NFL: Titans vs Cowboys Sun. October 10 – 3:15PM – Cowboys Stadium – CBS The return of VY to the Metroplex might not be as pleasant as his last visit. He’ll probably end up hanging out at the Spearmint Rhino since his Onyx pass has been revoked. The Titans have a strong defense and a great running back in Chris Johnson. Vince Young is quite dangerous when he gets in a groove. The Cowboys will have their hands full trying to defeat the team formerly known as the Houston Oilers. Hopefully the bye week will have the Cowboys offense ready to go and the defense playing lights out.

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by: Joe Avezzano “The Coach”

It certainly was an important, satisfying win against Houston. It momentarily keeps the critics at bay and gives hope for the future. Then the off week. What did that accomplish? Rest is about the only positive of the week. Very little practice and a full weekend off… Was the off week good to have this early?

No! But the Cowboys didn’t have a choice.

The NFC East comprises three teams at 2-2 and the Cowboys at 1-2. So after four weeks not much has changed from the start of the season. The three major concerns before it all began were OT Free, FS Ball and K Buehler. At this point all three are operating well and other concerns have popped up. I believe there is a roster imbalance that can be a problem before it’s all done.

Having only three corners, to me, can be a problem. Going into a game without G Phil Costa being active as a backup center is a disaster waiting to happen. Playing LBs James and Brooking more snaps than desired will catch up to you. LB Lee must develop to help this situation. But his missed practice time has forced the coaches to play the veterans for now. How do the Cowboys work in and utilize Dez Bryant? It is obvious that the young man has special talent. It is a learning curve as he becomes a professional. Progress still needs to be made in route running but it is up to the coaches to place him in positions where he can help the team. Felix Jones is underutilized and becoming one of the least productive members of his draft class, which featured a number of running backs. Can he be more productive? We won’t know until he’s given more chances to play.

As for the Dez Bryant dinner tab of $55,000—first of all there is no tradition in the NFL that a rookie takes 40-plus people to dinner. Sometimes rookies do take other players at their position (say, 10 or fewer) to dinner. Dez had no experience with such situations and in this case some teammates were taking advantage of him. Ordering wine and champagne bottles to take home and chuckling about it is wrong. Dez can spend his money however he wishes but some of his teammates should be ashamed of their lack of class. Tradition has nothing to do with this situation. by: Jay Betsil “Man On the Inside”

The Dallas Cowboys’ bye week came at an opportune time as they dealt with their nagging injuries to Jason Witten, Dez Bryant, Kyle Kosier, Marc Colombo, Sean Lee, Mike Jenkins and Sam Hurd. But even on their bye week, the Dallas Cowboys managed to make national news as word leaked out about the team’s $54,896 dinner tab at Pappas Bros. Steakhouse that was picked up by wide receiver Dez Bryant, apparently as part of his rookie duties.

So fresh off their bye week and a good steak dinner, the Dallas Cowboys (1-2) welcome the Tennessee Titans (2-2) to Cowboys Stadium. The Titans head to Arlington following a tough 26-20 loss at home to the Denver Broncos.The Titans nearly survived against the Broncos, but the defense was unable to bail out the offense. Leading 20-16 in the fourth quarter, the Titans gave the ball back to Denver with 2:42 left. On the critical second-and-25 from midfield, Broncos quarterback Kyle Orton launched the ball to wide receiver Jabar Gaffney, who was interfered with by Titans safety Chris Hope.

On second down, Orton completed a 6-yard touchdown pass to running back Correll Buckhalter to give the Broncos a 23-20 lead. Any chance of a rally ended on the ensuing kickoff, when rookie Marc Mariani was unable to handle a short kickoff. The Broncos recovered his fumble and went on to add a field goal.

The Titans offense sputtered for the entire game. Quarterback Vince Young was 17/28 for 173 yards. Superstar running back Chris Johnson managed only 53 yards on 19 carries. Meanwhile, Kyle Orton dissected the Titans for 341 yards and two touchdowns.

“We’ll put this in perspective,’’ Titans head coach Jeff Fisher said. “The players know we beat ourselves. We’ll identify those areas and move on. We’ll have them ready to practice for a very talented Cowboy team that’s coming off a bye week.’’

On their week off, the Cowboys saw the Giants and Redskins win and the Eagles lose, meaning the other three teams are all tied at 2-2. A victory over the Titans would propel the Cowboys right back into the division mix after their horrific 0-2 start.

9

by: Kris Boudreau //“Voice Out West”

The best Ranger teams in franchise history until this year have had the misfortune of facing the Yankee Dynasty of the 1990s. In 1996, 1998, and 1999, the Yankees defeated the Rangers in the first round of the playoffs with Texas getting their only win in Game 1 in 1996.

The 1996 Rangers were a magical team led by superstars such as Juan Gonzales and Ivan Rodriguez who led the franchise to their first postseason berth ever. Gonzales showed why he was the AL MVP in Game 1 with a three-run homer in the 5th inning followed by a Dean Palmer two-run shot that gave the Rangers a lead they would not relinquish as they took Game 1 in Arlington. However, it would be all downhill from there in this series, as well as in Texas Rangers baseball history, as they would fail to win another postseason game. Game 2, maybe the most excruciating loss in franchise history, saw Gonzales homer twice, giving the Rangers a 4-1 lead going into the 5th. The resilient Yanks would chip away and eventually tie it in the 8th.

With the game moving into extra innings, the Rangers would blow chances in the 10th, 11th, and 12th innings while the game ended in the bottom of the 12th with a Dean Palmer throwing er-

ror, allowing the winning run to score.

The same theme held true for Games 3 and 4 as the Rangers just could not get that big hit late in the game. Texas lost the series in Game 4 after once again blowing an early lead. Juan Gonzales showed why he was the AL MVP, homering in every game and ending the series with a total of five home runs.

The Rangers won the first of their back-to-back division titles in 1998 but again faced a team in the Yankees that had set the American League win total record going 114-48—arguably one of the greatest teams in baseball history. Todd Stottlemyre gave a valiant effort in Game 1, giving up only 2 runs and throwing a complete game but the Texas offense had no answer to David Wells as he threw eight shutout innings before Rivera closed it out in the 9th. Texas’ only run of the series would come off Andy Pettitte in the 5th inning of Game 2, after Pudge singled in Gonzales. But Shane Spencer would hit his second homer along with Paul O’Neil and again the lone run would not be enough as Pettitte, Nelson and Rivera would limit them to only five hits. David Cone shut the door on Rangers playoff hopes in Game 3 as he and the rest of the Yanks shut out the Rangers and completed the sweep.

Paul O’Neil’s homer in the 6th was all they needed; however, Spencer added a three-run shot to put the Yanks up 4-0.

The pain and suffering continued into 1999 as the Yankees, once again, swept the Rangers as Texas failed to make the playoffs for a decade following. Game 1 seemed to set the tone as Bernie Williams’ five RBIs helped lead the Yanks to an 8-0 blowout behind yet another shutout from Orlando (El Duque) Hernandez. The Yankees’ Dynasty of the 1990s included some of the greatest teams in baseball history, with their role players coming up big in big spots. This never held truer than in Game 2 when Gonzalez homered in the 4th to give Texas a 1-0 lead, only to have Scott Brosius, Ricky Ledee, and Chad Curtis lead the comeback to go up three. Another stellar postseason performance by Pettitte closed out Game 2 after Rivera shut it down in the 9th. The Yanks role players won Game 2, but the stars came out in Game 3 to shut the door and complete the sweep.

Roger Clemens went seven scoreless innings after Esteban Loaiza gave up a three-run homer to Daryl Strawberry in the first. The game would finish 3-0 after Rivera once again closed out the game, the series, and for a decade, Texas Rangers postseason baseball.

10

R T T by: Frank LaCosta

Craig Monroe is from Texarkana (the Texas side) and spent nine seasons in the outfield as a Major Leaguer. He was drafted by the Texas Rangers in 1995 and was called up on July 28, 2001. As a Detroit Tiger, he has been forever immortalized in baseball lore for his grand slam in a pivotal game in a tight division race against the White Sox. His success in baseball has translated well with his very own sports bar, Twenty7. Craig was kind enough to take a few minutes for this interview.

Back when the Rangers drafted you in 1995, what did it feel like to know you were selected?

Craig Monroe: You can’t explain it or describe it. You grow up being an athlete and playing football and basketball and then baseball, and I never really thought, ‘How do these guys get on TV, for me to be watching them?’ Then obviously in high school I had the chance to go hit up the Ballpark in Arlington and it started to sink in, like, this is how these guys do it. Scouts come around and they actually find good talented players and they give you a chance. And for me to get that chance was like one of the greatest things I could ever imagine. The chance to live out that childhood dream. Being in the backyard, and you know, it’s the seventh game of the World Series, I’m Ken Griffey, Jr. Now I was getting the chance to actually reach this goal.

You have a World Series appearance under your belt, with the Tigers. Can you describe the feeling as you first stepped out on the diamond that first game?

CM: All the sweat and tears in the offseason, all the headaches that you went through the season before… The guys challenging each other, pushing you to get better during the offseason… You walk out and you realize that this is why we did it. This is why we went through the tough times with each other. Because when you walk out there and see the fans… It’s bigger than anything you ever imagined. Walking out on the field, you know it’s history. It will forever be 2006, the Tigers against the St. Louis Cardinals. This is why you play. Going out there you can find that extra gear or two. Like right now, I’m excited for the Rangers because I know that good feeling: you can definitely go to the next level, where the fans are behind you and people are really pushing. You can feel the city enjoying it and you thrive on it. As an athlete that’s what it feels like. The city of Detroit… We took them on a ride that nobody had been on for a long time. And you were a big part of that. Man, that’s special.

For the postseason, what do you think the Rangers batters need to prepare for?

CM: The big thing is, it’s not a regular season game. Every pitch, every out, every little thing you do, this is the time to think about it. Through a 162-game season you might not think about the little things as much. But this is the time you’re thinking about hitting the inside corner of the base

“Baseball Fanatic”

trying to get to the next base. Little things that we often forget about.

So you feel it all comes down to execution. And everything is magnified, everything is positive or negative.

CM: It’s going to be blown up, but here’s the deal.

When you’re at the plate they’re going to pitch to you like this is the last game they’re going to play. If they know you can’t hit a breaking ball… From my own experience, I remember hitting a couple of home runs off some good fast balls, and all of a sudden they were throwing breaking balls. You know, sliders to keep you off balance. It seemed like they just wouldn’t stop until I’d proved myself. So for me, yes, it was magnified. And those weaknesses you have?

Think about the positive things and think about the good swings. ‘Sliders? I haven’t been sitting on a slider all year...’

And in the World Series you can’t start changing your game plan. You’ve got to look for the fastball and adjust. So I think, when you get to the playoffs, stick to the game plan, stick to what you’ve been doing. And I’m impressed with the Rangers. Their pitching has been amazing, too. If they just continue to do what they’ve always done... They’ve always been good hitters. That team has a bunch of ‘em. I had an awesome time playing with Michael Young, getting to see him develop into one of the best hitters in the major leagues. So I’m excited to see what they can do in the playoffs, right.

As you look back on your career, what are you most proud of?

CM: The first thing was walking into that Texas Rangers clubhouse and seeing number 21, my jersey. To look around and see Rodriguez, Palmeiro…Guys I’d idolized, guys I’d looked up to, wanted to be like. To put that jersey on and be on the same field… I don’t think I have just one moment.

All the moments, just playing. Like getting to meet Ken Griffey, Jr. for the first time, and him being my idol. And getting the chance to play against him. Shake his hand and be friends with him. Like, who gets to do that? Well, I had the chance to do that and I can never forget that day. Or the day we were playing the White Sox in Detroit. They were a good team and had a good chance of beating us and we were battling with them. The bases were loaded and I had a great at-bat against Javier Vasquez. An eleven-pitch at bat, I think. I was fouling off balls and he was throwing me everything. Then, I don’t even remember what the pitch was, I hit a grand slam that put us ahead. And I can’t lie about that, that sticks out. Then there was a home run at Fenway Park

against Bill Pulsipher, my second one in the big leagues.

I’ll never forget that.

I remember playing video games, thinking about hitting a home run at Fenway Park, over the Green Monster—then I got a chance to do that.

Those were the things I enjoyed about the game. I’ve got nothing but great things to say. I was blessed to be able to achieve all the great things that I wanted to do in life.

What are you up to these days? What’s keeping you busy?

CM: Twenty7, the sports bar, is keeping me busy. Everyone is talking about baseball, asking me if I’m missing it.

Look, I’ll forever love baseball and baseball will forever be a big part of my life. The camaraderie, being in the clubhouse with the guys, being in the trenches with them. Those are the things you miss. So this sports bar is what I wanted to create: a place for camaraderie, where if you walk in, we know your name, you can come in and be comfortable—something like a member of the family. That’s what this place has been for me, and it hasn’t really allowed me to feel the reality of not playing. I understand. I know this too shall pass. And the camaraderie here is my scene now. So I love coming here, I love meeting all these new people here in Plano who are becoming friends.

This is something that I love to do. Just to talk to you, to interact and talk about the game. This is where I can do it and have fun with it.

11 by: Frank LaCosta

“Baseball Fanatic”

Rangers Take On The Rays The Rangers on Opening Day revealed a new slogan for the 2010 season on their Jumbotron: “It’s Time.” Throughout the season, anytime a hurdle had to be overcome the phrase “It’s Time” came to mind. After off-the-field distractions, injuries, the acquisition of Cliff Lee, a red hot June and wrapping up the division with a week left in the regular season loyal Ranger fans have been rewarded by the team’s first postseason appearance since 1999. A team that many baseball enthusiasts consider the best of the worst will face off with the Tampa Bay Rays. The team fell short of Nolan Ryan’s prediction of 92 wins by two wins but still the new regime under Chuck Greenberg has to be happy.

Rangers Pitching Staff

Rays Pitching Staff

Cliff Lee is the undisputed ace of the staff and will be the Game 1 starter. His record with the team so far might not reflect it, but Lee was brought in for the postseason. Game 2 starter C.J. Wilson has been a pleasant surprise this season as he left the bullpen for the starting rotation. He leads the teams in wins with 15, has an ERA of 3.35 and pitched 204 innings. Colby Lewis will start Game 3 on Saturday. He pitched last year in Japan before the Rangers wisely signed him; he now leads the staff in strikeouts with 196. If there is a Game 4 then look for Tommy “Big Game” Hunter to take the mound. He is more than comfortable pitching at home, where he earned seven of his thirteen wins this season. His ERA at home is 3.06 and he has a complete game effort under his belt. “The Submariner” Darren O’Day has 22 holds this season and will be brought in as needed.

Neftali Feliz is the closer and has 40 this season, tying the MLB record for rookies.

The pitching staff of the Rays has been the strength of the team throughout the regular season. David Price will take the mound on Wednesday for Game 1 and has emerged as the staff ace. The lefty led the team in wins with 19, 208.2 innings pitched, an ERA of 2.72 and a WHIP of 1.19. These numbers are phenomenal and Cy Youngworthy. The Game 2 starter will be James Shields. This is an odd move since Shields has a 13-15 record, a 5.18 ERA and a 1.46 WHIP, allowing way too many homers.

The Game 3 starter will be Matt Garza.

The RHP has respectable numbers, with 15 wins, 204.2 innings pitched, an ERA of 3.91 and a 1.25 WHIP. RHP Wade Davis would be the Game 4 starter. He has spent time on the DL this season and has 12 wins under his belt. His 4.07 ERA is nice but his 1.35 WHIP detracts from it.

Former Texas Ranger Joaquin Benoit has been a big help, leading the team with 25 holds. Which brings us to closer Rafael Soriano and his 45 saves this season. If the Rays take a lead into the seventh inning they will be difficult to beat.

Photo Courtesy: Matt Pearce

Rangers Hitters If Josh Hamilton is truly back then this group of hitters will be feared. For most of the season prior to his recent stint on the DL, Hamilton was thought of as a Triple Crown candidate. He leads the team with a .359 batting average, 32 home runs and he drove in 100 runs. One can only imagine his stats if he had been healthy all season. It’ll be interesting to see how he fares against his former team in the postseason.

Michael Young has been the team’s most consistent hitter. His 21 HRs is impressive, coupled with 91 RBIs and a .284 batting average. The Rangers struck gold when they signed Vladimir Guerrero. At home he has been incredible and overall he has 115 RBIs, 29 HRs and a .300 batting average. Finally, a healthy Nelson Cruz and Ian Kinsler represent two more reasons for Rays pitchers to lose sleep.

Rays Hitters As a group, Rays hitters maximize their opportunities. Their collective batting average is only .248. When it comes to hitters, former Texas Ranger 1B Carlos Pena packs the most punch. He has 28 jacks this season to lead the team, with only 84 RBIs. That’s a lot of solo shots. LF Carl Crawford is their best all-around threat. This season he is batting .307, has 19 HRs and the most hits on the team with 184. Crawford also excels on the basepaths with 47 stolen bases. 3B Evan Longoria has the best on-base percentage of the Rays hitters with .372 and leads the team with 104 RBIs. He has 22 HRs this season. To round out their top hitters is B.J. Upton, with 18 home runs, 62 RBIs and 42 stolen bases.

13

by: Jesse Whitman //“A Woman’s Perspective”

Photo Courtesy: Creative Commons Attribution ShareAlive 3.0

by: Dennis Hambright

www.dennishambright.com

I admit, I never thought I’d be single again.

But I never thought a bottle of water would cost more than a Coke or Playboy would be considered “soft porn,” either…so go figure.

But here I am, once again fishing for “keepers” in the feminine pond, and brother, let me tell you, there are some dark and scary waters out there these days.

To put it bluntly: What the hell happened? Whatever happened to just walking up to a lady and introducing yourself and asking her out for a cup of coffee or lunch and dazzling her with those unique skills that separate us from the “tree swingers.” You know, opposable thumbs and good conversation. Sure, you can still try that approach, but you’re just as likely to get a snootful of pepper spray—unless you’re in a dark bar, where bad lighting and cheap booze mask the true view, and the direct approach is more tolerated and encouraged.

If you really want to be in the dating game these days, you’re expected to wander around that social maze of misfits known as online dating. That’s right…I said misfits, because like people who think playing a videogame is real exercise, anybody who thinks he’ll meet somebody “real” in an online dating site probably sends his social security number and bank information to that poor Nigerian doctor’s wife who sent him an email asking for help getting her $45 million out of the country.

Okay, I’ll admit it, I checked out a few of those dating sites to see what all the buzz was about, and I’ll give you my unbiased, objective opinion. They suck! And here are a few reasons why: Like Hunting Easter Eggs in a Mine- why they like staying home. Really, how field: Sorry to sound shallow, but let’s face many attractive, intriguing women do you the truth. For every good-looking woman know who just love staying home? That’s who posts a picture on a dating site, you right… none! Unless they’re bloated or have to wade through a dozen barkers. And missed a few workouts or had a big Mexiwho do you think sends you all of those can meal and think that all their clothes “winks” and “look at me” emails? You make their butt look too big, any woman got it… the Deputy Dawg Brigade. I got you want to be seen with, wants to be seen so tired of hitting delete, delete, delete, that with you, and that means out in public… it was more trouble than it was worth. It’s doing something fun. like hunting Easter eggs in a minefield… you might ultimately find one, but you’ll Click-A-Pic-Trick: If a lady only has one probably get blown up a lot along the way. pic posted, that means that out of all the shoeboxes full of pics she dug through, They Lie: Pure and simple, they all lie. If that was the only one that didn’t make the all those women loved to cook and cuddle dog try to drown itself in the toilet. If she and hold hands, and just enjoyed evenings had more good pics, she’d post them. And at home watching a DVD or sports on tele- you know if she’s got a cell phone camera, vision, they wouldn’t be single. Unless, she probably burned up two batteries tryof course, they’re too hideous to be seen ing to get just the right angle and couldn’t. outside the gates of the dungeon, and that’s So beware!

We spend half of our lives asleep and to most of us with busy schedules, jobs to report to, kids to feed, mortgages to pay, sleep is just a functional part of life, something to keep us going along like gerbils running in circles on our daily grind. Most people just wake up like they’re waking up from the dead, not remembering any of their dreams, even though dreams happen to all of us every night whether we are aware of it or not. Our unconscious mind is aware of them but what fun is it if we aren’t conscious of our dreams in our waking life? Dreams are 50 percent of our lives. That’s a lot of time we could be making the most of. Why not enjoy it and experience it to the fullest, as we do the events of our waking lives?

I came out of the movie “Inception” a little bit confused, but mostly wanting to hurry up and go to sleep so I could have some amazing dreams that I would actually remember. Aside from Leonardo DiCaprio’s stiff over-acting, the movie really got me thinking about not just remembering my dreams, which would be a good start, but actually being aware that I was dreaming and taking control of what was happening.

In other words, having what the experts call “lucid dreams.” David Fontana, author of “The Secret Language of Dreams,” explains lucid dreams as dreams that are free of the irrationality and disjointedness that are common in non-lucid dreams. The dreamer also has access to all functions of waking life and feels no difference between sleeping and waking. And when you wake up from a lucid dream it is remembered in precise detail.

What’s happening in your brain is that you are creating a dissociation: part of your brain is in a waking state and the other part is in a dreaming state.

Besides having an amazing time and being able to do whatever your heart desires— flying high above the earth, visiting another planet, fulfilling a sexual fantasy without judgment—with lucid dreams you also have the opportunity to confront your biggest fears head on as well as discover your true desires free of filters.

Just remembering dreams is hard enough, but lucid dreaming? That takes some practice. People who are lucid dreamers often have a high degree of concentration and awareness in their daily lives—emulating them would be a good place to start.

Also, before you go to bed and throughout the day keep telling yourself that you are going to have amazing lucid dreams that night.

This may sound silly but it works. Your unconscious will be listening to your conscious thoughts. Then, when you’re finally in dreamland make note of when something really bizarre happens—which it probably will—and use that as a signal that you must be dreaming since something that weird could never happen in daily life. And once you have a hold of your dream, take charge of it and run wild! Sleeping will take you on an amazing journey and lead you to whatever your heart truly desires. So, good night and sweet dreams!

Crossword Solution

14

by: Sam Chase

“Culture Warrior”

Thai Soon

Photo Courtesy: Steven Hendrix

THAI ME UP, THAI ME DOWN By now many longtime Dallas residents know about Thai Soon. Over the years, since the restaurant left its roomy location on Lower Greenville, bloggers have praised the food for the most part, while the modest quarters on Coit Rd. (at Beltline) have been dissed by types who didn’t like the décor, or smelled something besides Thai food in the air, or resented being so close to fellow diners that they couldn’t tune out their conversation.

Yeah, the place is tiny and there are too many tables. Only the servers can safely fly about the room. And yeah, the walls are plastered with awards and headlines about Thai Soon’s food. But it’s all superfluous—even the white tablecloths and the fresh flowers, usually orchids. From the moment I come in all I can think of is what I’m about to put in my mouth.

Here are all the Thai classics as well as some creations that remind me of the late Annie Wong’s. Annie pioneered dishes like green curry with Japanese eggplant that depart from classical Thai fare. Long before she reached her apogee with Liberty, Annie had protégés all over the country—one up in Northport, Maine, where his way of cooking gave him away.

To my mind the food at Thai Soon is as adventurous as the best of Annie’s, full of contrasting tastes and colors and textures. The yellow curry with spinach and flat rice noodles (#43) surpasses any noodle dish I’ve ever tried. The yellow curry itself is an adventure—quite different from a Madras curry or its equivalents in Chinese or Vietnamese cooking.

The green curry and red (panang) curry also have their own distinctive voices. For those (like my gang) who are trying to eat more vegetables, the

101 S. Coit at Beltline PH: 972-234-6111 Mon.-Fri. 11-3, 3-10; Sat.-Sun. 11:30-10 BYOB Steamed Vegetables Coconut Red Curry (#31) is a marvel, featuring two types of cabbage and green beans and a sauce that has a strong flavor of galangal root (blue ginger rhizome). As with many Thai restaurants these days, only sauces and vegetable ingredients are listed, so that on each menu entrée from #18 to #49 nine variations are possible. (How hot is up to you.)

In the old days the menu was mostly vegetarian but now includes—along with tofu—chicken, shrimp, squid, fish, crab, scallops, salmon, and mussels (still no beef). The shrimp are always plump and tasty, never too dry. The fish is sometimes too dry, its batter jacket built up like a French confit. Not the salmon, however, which marries well with all the sauces and treatments. So tantalizing are these flavors that when I’ve devoured everything on my plate, I attack the remaining liquid with the last of my steamed rice.

The fragrant rice here is in a class by itself and the same goes for the corn fritters (with their hot-sweet cucumber dipping sauce) and all of the soups. The yellow curry and coconut soup is to die for, chock full of al dente vegetables.

With a side of steamed rice the small portion of this soup, with tofu, makes a satisfying light meal. The larb and some of the other salads are excellent light meals also.

Portions are huge and the lunches here are a bargain at $7.95. Service at Thai Soon is always attentive without being obtrusive. The food arrives the moment it’s ready, even if that means a separate trip for each dish. Make sure you’re with friends who will want you to start eating while your food is piping hot.

15

We won’t know until next year whether it’s a legitimate contender to the iPad’s tablet throne, but we know this much: they definitely got the name right. The BlackBerry PlayBook is a new 7-inch touchscreen tablet aimed more at the business crowd, but packing plenty of widely-appreciated features like dual HD cameras, a 1GHz dual-core processor, 1GB of RAM, HDMI output, 802.11n Wi-Fi, Bluetooth 2.1+EDR, 1080p video playback, 1024x600 resolution, Adobe Flash Player 10.1 support, and Blackberry’s new — and yet unproven — Tablet OS. Price - TBA As one Blitz Weekly writer is finding out, wallmounting your TV is easy, but figuring out what to do about a sound system once it’s up there isn’t. Some engineers at Bose obviously had the same problem, and came up with the Bose VideoWave. This ridiculously-priced 46inch screen packs an entire array of speakers directly into its body, and needs only a single connection to its console, which you control with a simplified click pad remote. Just make sure you mount it well — if it falls, both your TV and your home theater system will suffer.

Price - $5,400 Ever wonder how those arcade basketball games could tell the difference between a two and a three? You don’t have to wonder with the Sportcraft Step Back 3. This minibasketball game features a pressure-sensitive mat that knows whether you’re shooting from downtown or have a foot on the line, while offering up LED scoring, a tubular steel frame, eight different games for up to four players, four included 7-inch balls, and an included pump. An eight-foot ceiling height is recommended; no dunking allowed.

Price - $150

New Market Center Hank Haney Golf Center Is A Birdie After years being buried in the rough of Uptown’s development, the Hank Haney City Place Golf Center closed this year only to land safely on the fairway at 2300 N. Stemmons Freeway.

No longer limited by space restraints, the new Market Center location is more voluptuous and more 21th century fox than the old girl.

Hank’s is the only grass driving range inside LBJ freeway. Operating until 10 pm the range offers an intoxicating view of the Dallas skyline as a fairway target. Regular range balls have replaced the distance-retarded balls required at City Place. And the added space has allowed for a short game and putting area as well as enough parking for a hospital…

Not to be confused with the Children’s Hospital parking lot next door. A bucket of 50 balls is $8 and 110 go for $15. Rental clubs are available for little tikes and adults.

Inside is a Full Swing Golf simulator with 67 of the world’s most famous golf courses. The laser tracking system calculates everything from ball speed, launch angle, distance and club speed.

And you know that 8 iron you smashed against the tree? Or the wedge you left on the fringe after your eagle dance on 11? Well, inside Hank’s is ProTech Golf, a full service club fitting and repair shop run by former Nike PGA Tour Club

Technician Steve “Wally” Walakovitz. Specialty clubs can also be built and purchased.

Hank’s is still the best place in town to mash balls, but Haney’s reputation was built on teaching. Long before he walked away from Tiger’s car crash of a career or took on celebrity golf hacks, Haney was recognized for revolutionizing how golf instructors taught golf.

All of the instructors at Hank’s are disciples of Haney’s teaching methods, and either former tour players or Hank Haney Certified Instructors led by Director Brian Mahon, who has taught tour professionals like Duffy Waldorf and Edward Loar.

Using techniques designed by Haney, instructors first observe students on the range, then record their swing on an indoor video monitor. This video is broken down to identify faults, then instructors utilize a teaching method developed by Haney to teach swing mechanics. Mahon describes this method as physically “moving” the student through the swing so the student can “feel” the mechanics of swing.

Lessons are available for golfers of all handicaps and ages ranging in price from $75 to $250 per hour based on instructor, with individual packages available. So whether you want to play an extreme version of Golden Tee, see if those grips are worn, finally take that lesson or just work on your game, Hank Haney’s Golf Center at Market Center is the top in golf.

JOKES

17

HORRORSCOPES

FUNNIES

Q: What do redheads and McDonald’s have in common?

A: You’ve never had it so good and so fast.

Q: What’s the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer?

A: The taste.

Q: What’s the best thing about dating a homeless girl?

A: You can drop her off anywhere.

Q: What’s the difference between a wife and a job?

A: After five years, the job still sucks.

The Pretty Teacher A pretty teacher was concerned with one of her students. Taking him aside after class one day, she asked, “Little Johnny, why has your school work been so poor lately?”

“I’m in love,” the boy replied.

Holding back an urge to smile, she asked, “With whom?”

“With YOU!” he said.

“But Johnny,” she said gently, “don’t you see how silly that is? It’s true that I would like a husband of my own someday.

But I don’t want a child.”

“Oh, don’t worry,” the boy said reassuringly, “I’ll use a rubber!”

ACROSS: 1. Deep sleep 5. Family 8. Creative work 12. Throat-clearing sound 13. Long-necked bird 15. Eat 16. Connects two points 17. Part of a lyric poem 18. Distinctive flair 19. A climber 22. Instinctive 23. Father 24. One who accomplishes 26. Take for granted 29. A composite of mixed origin 31. Any high mountain 32. Forbidden 34. Apostle Peter 36. Enticement 38. Exploded stars 40. Rational 41. Mistake 43. Slow 45. Acquired 46. Silver wattle 48. A gabled extension 50. Nipple

51. Orange pekoe or Earl Grey 52. Each and every one 54. Become worse 61. Honey insects 63. Ways 64. Credit card brand 65. Flick about sharply 66. Water vapor 67. Memorable periods 68. Consequence 69. Not the beginning 70. Stringed instrument DOWN: 1. Serene 2. Cleveland’s state 3. List of choices 4. Recompense 5. Yachting cap 6. Press laundry 7. Connecting point 8. Lyric poem 9. Journey 10. A Central American sloth 11. Dispatched 13. Chieftain 14. Destitute 20. Tight

21. Holds up 25. Goddess of discord (Greek mythology) 26. Warning signal 27. Lacking ardor or vigor or energy 28. Hemorrhagic fever 29. Stockpile 30. One who gives 31. President Lincoln 33. Egg cells 35. Mesh 37. Hefty volume 39. Self-importance 42. Street 44. Chocolate cookie 47. Stalks 49. Wonder 52. Competent 53. Loyal 55. Carry 56. Biblical garden 57. Absorb written material 58. Well-ventilated 59. Russian emperor 60. Lack of difficulty 62. Third person pronoun female

18 by: Pat Moran “Man on His Throne”

Photo Courtesy: Heng Wang

SOCKING IT TO THE SOX Well, it’s October. The leaves are starting to turn, the sunny days are starting to darken and the playoffs are just about to start. All is right in the world.... Well, not everything by a long shot. There’s just something in the air... It’s sweet, it’s beautiful and it’s pretty damn amazing.

It’s October and the Red Sox aren’t in the playoffs.

How great is that? I am ecstatic. Granted,

on ESPN some talking haircut is clamoring on and on about “what happened” with the Red Sox. I’ll tell you what happened – they aren’t very good. They are third. You know who else is in third place in their division?

The Brewers, the Marlins and the Angels (whose fall from grace is almost as sweet as the Sox’s). Get over it. Spending a billion dollars won’t guarantee you a damn thing, but it will make you look like a huge fool

the Yankees are an inch away from being the devil but if the Yankees are 1 then the Red Sox are 1A. Their fans are some of the most annoying, petulant little children who can’t get over the fact that not everyone in this country cares about Boston. I’m an American League West fan.

I could give a crap about the East, but it’s great seeing the mighty fall.

But when the Red Sox fall, they fall without grace or dignity. Every two seconds

when you are sitting in third place and outside of the playoffs.

It’s a good month, and it’s only going to get better. Thank you, Red Sox fans, for all your help in this massive fall. It’s very much appreciated.

Oh, yeah—I almost forgot. Hey Boston A$$holes, Socks is spelled with a “-cks” not with an “x.” It’s like a freaking text message.

Double Your Pleasure

While You Pump !

Monday Nights We’re Giving Away a hot pAir of

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Register during half-time of each game. Winner will be drawn at the start of the third quarter, 9/13-12/27.

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October 14th - 7:30 FREE commemorative Opening Night mug to the first 14,000 fans over 21

Party on AT&T Plaza 6:15- 7:15 FREE live concert by Here In Arms.

Food and drink specials.

For tickets, call 214-GO-STARS or visit DallasStars.com