Crank Calls

Here are some more crank calls - those funny telephone calls that are designed to wind people up. Have fun listening to these two. (Answers on page 44.)

Call I: The Suspect

For this call, we pretended to be the police, offering a member of the public some useful information. Listen to the conversation and answer this question, why do the police phone?

Victim: Jane Grace speaking, how may I help you? Hot: Hello, this is Chief Inspector Broadstone. Victim: I’m afraid you’re going to have to speak up. I can’t hear you very well. Hot: Please listen carefully. I, Chief Inspector Broadstone, am part of an undercover surveillance operation. Victim: What? Hot: I said. Oh, never mind. I am just calling to inform you that we have the suspect under surveillance. Victim: What suspect? Hot: The suspect. Victim: But what suspect? What are you talking about? Hot: The man who lives in your building. Victim: What? Hot: There’s a middle-aged, balding man who lives in your building. He leaves the house ever y day at 07:00 in the morning and returns at about 18:00. Victim: What? I don’t understand. What’s going on? Hot: We believe that this man is involved in an international narcotics operation. Victim: But that man is my husband. What are you talking about? Hot: We have reason to believe that this man is highly dangerous. Victim: I don’t understand… Hot: Just exercise extreme caution. We’ll be in contact shortly.

Call II: Car for Sale

For this call, we placed a classified ad in a local newspaper offering a car for sale. Listen to the conversation and answer this question, what’s wrong with the car?

Hot: Hello, Nigel speaking. Victim: Oh, hi. I was just calling about the ad you have offering the car for sale. Hot: Oh, yeah, right, yes. Victim: Can you tell me anything about it? Hot: Yes, it’s a 1997 Opel Corsa. It’s got about 30,000 miles on the clock. Victim: Sounds good. Could I come round and see it? Take it for a test drive, maybe? Hot: Yes, of course. I’m just on my way home now. (Car horn sounds.) (Shouting to another driver.) Get out of the way, you idiot! Victim: Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t realise you were driving. I can call back later if you want. Hot: Yes, perhaps you should. It’s just I’m driving up the motorway in first gear. Victim: In first gear? Hot: The gears are jammed. But don’t worry. It doesn’t happen often. Victim: Oh. Hot: (Beeping sound.) (Shouting to a driver.) And the same to you! Victim: Erm, I think I’ll call back later, if that’s OK. Hot: Yeah, no problem. Damn! Victim: What’s wrong? Hot: Nothing. The wing mirror just fell of f. (More beeping sounds.) Victim: Erm, I think you should pull over. Hot: I’m going to turn around and see if I can pick up the mirror. Call me about the car later. Victim: OK! Oh, and be careful.

G L O S S A R Y

to wind someone up exp to really annoy someone to speak up phr vb to speak more loudly an undercover surveillance operation n a secret operation to observe a suspect under surveillance exp if someone is “under surveillance”, the police are watching them secretly a balding man n a man who is losing his hair an international narcotics operation n importing illegal drugs into a country a classified ad n a little piece of publicity in a newspaper offering something or asking for something 30,000 miles on the clock exp if a car has this, it has been driven for 30,000 miles to come round phr vb to go to someone’s house a test drive n a journey in a car to see how it works. This helps you decide whether to buy it or not a car horn n an object in a car that you press and that makes a loud noise get out of the way! exp move away! a motorway n a road with many lanes (lines) of traffic in first gear exp the gears in a car control the energy being used. A car travelling in first gear on the motorway would be making a very strange noise jammed adj if something is “jammed”, you cannot move it a beeping sound n a short loud, sound made by a car horn damn! exp informal an exclamation of anger a wing mirror n a mirror on the side of your car you use to see behind you to pull over phr vb to stop a car