On the cover, clockwise from top left: Stratford Chocolate Trail vouchers Photo by Jennifer Merrick; Gazebo in Angelica NY’s town park Photo by Nancy J. Parisi; Cartwright’s Maple Tree Inn Photo by Nancy J. Parisi; Swan Photo courtesy of Stratford Tourism; Taxidermy display Photo by Nancy J. Parisi; Tom Patterson Theatre bridge Photo courtesy of Stratford Tourism; Angelica Town Hall Photo by Nancy J. Parisi;
and Peter Pan, Stratford Festival 2024 Photo by David Hou.
Chris Vergara as Jacob with James Daly as Jean-Michel in La Cage aux Folles. Stratford Festival 2024.
Photo by David Hou
OUR 36TH YEAR
1412 Sweet Home Road, Suite 12
Amherst, NY 14228
Phone
716.783.9119
Fax 716.783.9983
www.foreveryoungwny.com
CORPORATE
President Sharon C. Levite
Vice President / Chief Revenue Officer / Publisher Barbara E. Macks
EDITORIAL
Executive Editor Meagan Walker Doxtad
Managing Editor Donna Hoke
Contributing Writers Amy Lynn Hardy, Carol Ann Harlos, Jennifer Merrick, Nancy J. Parisi, Judith A. Rucki, Carol DiPirro-Stipkovits, John Szalasny
Proofreader Sharon C. Levite
ART & PRODUCTION
Creative Director
Jean-Pierre Thimot
Lead Designer Nicholas Vitello
Senior Graphic Designers / Illustrators Joshua Flanigan, Kim Miers
Summer often feels like an hourglass, the time slipping away like sand, faster and faster as we near the end. I take it as a reminder to soak up as much warmth as possible—by hosting parties, picnics, or attending festivities around Western New York. Although local events are fantastic ways to make the most of summer, this issue encourages you to venture outside our region.
This month’s feature highlights getaways north and south of WNY. They’re great destinations, but even the best ones aren’t about the food, events, or atmosphere as much as they are a reason to make plans with the people you love! Pack those snacks, put on a podcast or favorite album, or let conversation with your copilot fill the air.
Never miss a Forever Young ! Subscribe for $12/year! Call 716-972-2238 or fill out and mail in the subscription form on page 24.
Whatever you do, enjoy the ride. We’re so confident you will that in September, Forever Young introduces a regular column that will give you a new day trip every month!
Drive safe,
Meagan Walker Doxtad Executive Editor
Photo by Luke Copping
FOREVER YOUNG *AUGUST RESOURCES
*PLEASE CONTACT EVENT/PROGRAM ORGANIZERS TO CONFIRM INFORMATION PROVIDED Do you have an event or resource to list? Email it to mdoxtad@foreveryoungwny.com.
Buffalo HEADWAY SUPPORT GROUPS For individuals who have sustained brain injuries, their families, and caregivers; exchange information and resources, and find mutual support and encouragement. Info: 408-3100 or headwayofwny.org
Buffalo PARKINSON’S CAREGIVER SUPPORT
GROUP meets on the first Thursday of each month at Elma Town Hall (1600 Bowen Road). Call or text Marcia 553-3030 for more information.
Buffalo ZERO/US TOO! PROSTATE CANCER SUPPORT GROUP meets on the first Tuesday of each month at the Buffalo VA Hospital (3495 Bailey Avenue, Room 301) 7-9 p.m. and at Sisters Hospital, St. Joe’s Campus (2605 Harlem Road in the First Floor Community Room) 7-9 p.m., on the third Tuesday of each month. Free and open to all.
Buffalo LGBTQ MEMORY LOSS CAREGIVERS
PROGRAM: The Pride Center of WNY offers support and education for people providing care for a person with Alzheimer’s Disease and other dementias. For information: 852-7743 or pridecenterwny.org.
Clarence WNY MEDICARE SMART START PROGRAM offers free help applying for Medicare. WNY MEDICARE SMARTSAVER PROGRAM offers free help to review, research, maximize coverage, and minimize out-of-pocket expenses. Services offered through WNY Medicare Resource Center. Info: 833-0252 or wnymedicare.org.
Depew BREAST CANCER NETWORK OF WNY Call 706-0060 or visit bcnwny.org for more information.
Derby GRAYCLIFF DOCENTS
NEEDED Upon completion of the Graycliff Docent Training Program, trainees will have the knowledge and confidence to present the stories of Graycliff to visitors in their own way. Explore opportunities at: experiencegraycliff.org/support/ volunteer.
East Aurora CHRONIC PAIN/ FIBROMYALGIA SUPPORT
GROUP meets at First Baptist Church (591 Porterville Road, East Aurora) from 10-11:30 a.m. on the third Saturday of each month. Facilitators are Sue Allen, retired RN; Rev. Dr. Barbara Hulsing; and Diane Weston, MA. Meetings will also be available via Zoom; contact Barbara at barb.hulsing@gmail. com or 574-0164 for info.
Erie County FOSTER GRANDPARENT PROGRAM
Erie County residents ages 55+: stay active and reap social-emotional health benefits by developing oneon-one relationships with children in a school setting. Stipend included. For info: 896-6388 or ccwny.org/older-adults.
Erie County RECEIVE OR MAKE A FRIENDLY CALL!
Participants and caring volunteers are sought for the free Catholic Charities’ Telephone Assurance Program (TAP) geared to adults 60+ and adults with disabilities who experience loneliness due to isolation. Volunteers must be at least 21 years old; all training is provided. To learn more about receiving calls volunteering, contact Catholic Charities at 262-6164 or TAP@ccwny.org.
Gowanda HEALTHY COMMUNITY ALLIANCE
Activities open to the public age 50+ (no residency requirements), Concord Senior Center, 1 School Street, Gowanda; for schedule, visit communityalliance.org; 532-1010.
Hamburg ALZHEIMER’S CAREGIVER SUPPORT GROUP for males; call 626-0600 or visit alz.org/wny for info.
Niagara Falls SENIOR COMPANION/FOSTER GRANDPARENT PROGRAM
Looking for seniors who enjoy working with their peers or children. Volunteers receive a tax-free stipend, transportation assistance, and supplemental insurance coverage while volunteering. If you are 55+ and want to make a difference, call 285-8224 Jennifer Britton (ext. 217) for Senior Companions and Kelly Carr (ext. 228) for Foster Grandparents.
Niagara Falls SINGLES SOCIAL CLUB: This active 50+ crowd holds Meet & Greets second Fridays at Tim Hortons (8500 Niagara Falls Boulevard) and dances third Friday at Buff Social Club (2565 Young St.). For more info, see Facebook: SINGLES SOCIAL CLUB or call 550-1232.
Northtowns SOARING SPIRITS WNY Widowed people meet for conversation, meals, and support. Ongoing meetings take place at Hillview Restaurant (6135 Transit Road) and Family Tree Restaurant (4336 North Bailey Avenue). Learn more at soaringspirits.org and on Facebook. For information, contact Toni (admucilli@gmail. com) or Debbie (howndeb@ hotmail.com).
Online IMAGINE BUFFALO SPEAKER SERIES Presented by the Buffalo & Erie County Public Library in conjunction with C-SAAHN and ImagineLifelongLearning.com via Zoom every Tuesday at 12:30 p.m. Each week features a local speaker and Q&A. FREE. Visit website for Zoom link: buffalolib. libcal.com.
Online LAUGHTER WELLNESS
Come as you are, just bring your laughter! Tuesdays at 11 a.m. FREE. Visit facebook.com/BuffaloLaughers for information.
Southtowns NEW HORIZONS
MUSIC Calling all musicians 50+. For info, email Janet Stout at 354janet@gmail.com and visit newhorizonsmusic.org.
West Seneca AMANA GARDEN CLUB OF WEST SENECA is welcoming new members interested in gardening, floral arrangement, and more. For more information, contact Marie: 884-8543.
Williamsville MCGUIRE GROUP MEMORY CARE SUPPORT: Coordinated with the Alzheimer’s Association, with caregiving tips and coping mechanisms. Info: 632-3700 or mcguiregroup.com.
West Seneca PARKINSON’S SOCIAL GROUP Make new friends every third Wednesday of the month at 6 p.m. at St. John’s Evangelical Lutheran Church (3512 Clinton Street). Info: 674-3287 or recmab@aol.com.
Multiple Locations TOPS CLUBS Take Off Pounds Sensibly Clubs offer tools, programs, support, and fellowship for healthy living and weight management.
Akron For info, call Diane 542-4980 Niagara Falls For info, call Shelley 550-1232
Farnham For info, call 934-9619
Lancaster For info, call Eva 407-0539
Silver Creek For info, call 680-0313
Tonawanda For info, call 693-5161
West Seneca For info, call 474-9125 www.tops.org
AhRoses, caterpillars, and annuals It must be August!
August, the month of joy and disappointment for the gardener! Where did the time go? How did the purslane take over the bare soil between the plants in your perennial bed? How in the world did the bachelor buttons or raspberries or rose mallow or mints get into other flowerbeds without you noticing? Although this article addresses August’s tasks and reader concerns, it also focuses on the joys.
The roses are still performing beautifully—if you watered, fed, and pruned them earlier. Powdery mildew or blackspot on the leaves? Put on your garden gloves and remove the diseased leaves from both the plants and the ground. This helps remove fungal spores and hopefully lessens next year’s infestation. Don’t feed the roses, trees, or shrubs any more during this growing season; that will encourage new growth that is more easily damaged during winter. Do keep watering these plants deeply to prepare their roots for winter. Are you noticing a silken web on your lilac, crab apples, birch, cherry trees, or other hardwoods? These are “fall webworm,” not tent caterpillars! The adult moths laid eggs on the underside of the leaves during May, June, and July. The larvae form webs around the leaves and feed on them. When they are ready to pupate, they drop to the ground. If it is healthy, the tree or shrub will survive this leaf loss as leaves would soon be shed as the growing season ends. If this encounter with nature disturbs you or you are worried about further damage to an already weakened tree or shrub, I suggest power hosing
the larvae—a simple solution involving no insecticides.
Annuals should be in their glory by now. Keep pinching off dead flowers and leaves so they will perform until the killing frosts take them. You will probably miss some annual flowers that are forming seeds. This is where gardening can be fun; next year, you may find seedlings coming up. It’s a great gardening experience to find out which annuals “breed true,” meaning they produce the same color and form the second year. Some of my personal favorite reseeding annuals are cleome, poppies, hollyhocks, flowering tobacco (Nicotiana), morning glories, and cosmos.
Did you place your Christmas cactus on the porch during this year’s growing season? Bring it back indoors toward the end of August. Give it a hosing first so you don’t bring uninvited guests into the house. You may wish to give it a dose of a fertilizer 0-10-10 (zero percent nitrogen, ten percent phosphorus, ten percent potassium) to nourish the development of flower buds. If you kept your Christmas cactus indoors, you may wish to place
it outside in a protected but well lit area. I like our front porch, which faces south. Keep the Christmas cactus there through September. You will notice that the evenings have begun to cool off toward the end of the month. Bring the plant indoors again. It will begin bud formation!
Keep up that weeding (yes, I hate this part of gardening too)! If weeds flower, they make more seeds and you’ll have to deal with it all next year! Go to your garden with clippers. Prune or collect flowers and foliage to enjoy indoors. One of my favorite activities is collecting plant materials for pressing. You can use these materials to make cards or bookmarks limited only by your imagination. FY
Carol Ann Harlos is an awardwinning retired math and science teacher, Master Gardener, beekeeper, writer, and speaker. She tends extensive gardens, including herbs, and loves learning from others and sharing her knowledge. Send gardening questions and comments to caharlos@verizon.net.
CAROL ANN HARLOS
Interviewing family
Each one has a story to tell
Summer is the perfect time to hit the road and visit out-of-town relatives. Of course, you’ll make time to sit with Aunt Ethel and enjoy a glass of her famous lemonade, but don’t forget to seize the opportunity to learn more about your family’s roots. Knowing who your ancestors were helps you understand who you are.
As a genealogist, you’re a historian, cartographer, researcher, and linguist, but there is an art to interviewing. In standard conversation, both people talk and exchange ideas. Interviews are different in that one person—you—has a goal, which means asking questions that will direct conversation to areas of interest.
Make a list of family members to interview and prioritize them, eldest first. The elders in our family carry a wealth of information in their memories; great-aunts and greatuncles, cousins, and even more distant relatives are helpful.
Preparation is key! Reach out to schedule a date and enough time so
you won’t feel rushed. Let relatives know what you hope to accomplish and ask if they have photos or family records to share. This gives them a chance to gather what may be a gold mine of information.
Have questions ready and, if possible, a voice or video recorder (most cell phones come with a voice recording app already installed). Not only does this free you from notetaking so you can enjoy the visit, but it also provides a recording of Aunt Ethel telling family stories for future generations. (If you get the famous lemonade recipe, all the better!) Start the recording with the date, time, and location; you think
you’ll remember, but you won’t. It’s easy enough to find lists of questions online, but I suggest first looking at how this person’s family is related to you. Are there brick walls you need help with? Holes that need to be filled in with dates or names? Keep in mind, some people (me included) have better visual memory so looking through old photos may help recall details and events.
When compiling questions, mark the most important ones so you’re sure to have them answered. Start with easy questions to put the interviewee at ease; my first is always, “Who were you named after?” which usually opens the floodgates of memories. This will set the pace for the rest of the interview. Ask questions that are non-threatening—or at least ask them in a non-threatening way. For example, don’t ask about dad’s affair with the butcher’s wife that resulted in a child; instead ask, “How many children did your father have altogether?” You may still hear about the whole sordid affair, but you haven’t insulted anyone. Most of all, be flexible. Rephrase questions if they don’t seem to know what information you’re seeking. If an interesting tidbit comes up, follow it with impromptu questions to see where it leads.
My best tip is something I struggle with myself: relax and allow grace. Ask your question and let them have the floor; even if they pause to think, don’t rush to the next question. Quiet moments or reminiscence can elicit new memories. Also, try not to interrupt; rather, be an active listener. Saying “okay” or “hmm” lets them know you are listening but doesn’t stop their thought process.
Charge your phone and/or mobile scanner before you go so it’s ready for any photos and documents that have been collected for you. I always bring a pencil to mark the backs of the photos with names, dates, and any additional information before scanning.
Before wrapping up, ask if they’d like to share anything else that would be interesting for future generations. I also ask for a piece of advice, favorite scripture, or best memory. This is how I learned that my mother and her siblings, growing up in the Adirondacks, looked forward to the first snowfall as it meant a treat of fresh snow with maple syrup—a treasured story I think of every first snowfall. We each see situations differently and, like a game of telephone, stories change as they’re passed around. Memories you gather need to be corroborated with other relatives and/ or documents. But start this summer by reaching out to elder relatives; it’s an excellent way to jump start or add color to your family research. FY
Carol DiPirro-Stipkovits is a member of both the National Genealogical Society and Association of Professional Genealogists. Carol is also Vice-President and Board Chairman of the Niagara County Genealogical Society.
Bingo Calendar
Please call event organizers to confirm information provided. Listings are alphabetical by day.
7 p.m. (first and third Sundays). ........ 434-2798
OUR LADY OF POMPEII
129 Laverack Ave., Lancaster
2 p.m. 683-6522
SENECA GAMING AND ENTERTAINMENT
11099 Route 5, Irving
1 & 7 p.m.
ST. ANDREW’S CHURCH 1525 Sheridan Dr., Kenmore
549-4389
7 p.m. 873-6716
BINGO IN CANADA
GOLDEN NUGGET
655 Garrison Rd., Fort Erie
1 & 7 p.m. daily • 10 p.m. Friday and Saturday
4 p.m. Saturday and Sunday. 905-871-1277
DELTA MONTE CARLO
4735 Drummond, N. Falls 1 & 7 p.m. 905-356-8104
CASINO
SENECA GAMING
Broad St., Salamanca
1 p.m. Sunday • 1 & 7 p.m. Wednesday
7 p.m. Thursday and Friday • 1 & 7 p.m. Saturday
945-4080, 877-860-5130
ONEIDA INDIAN HIGH STAKES
BINGO AT TURNING STONE
5218 Patrick Rd., Verona 12:45 & 7 p.m. daily 800-782-1938
Holy Mother of the Rosary Cathedral
MONDAY BINGO AT 11:30 AM, DOORS OPEN AT 10:00 AM
Weekly Queen of Hearts Game
6298 Broadway
Lancaster, NY 14086 (Between Schwartz and Ransom Roads) Phone (716) 685-5766
No single game under $60 • Air conditioned • Ample, free parking Bingo hall located on first floor with no stairs • Handicap accessible • All paper bingo Bingo camera with 4 monitors • Verification system • 2 progressive jackpots up to $2560 IN PRIZE MONEY + STW, RWB & Bonus Ball. Progressive STW Jackpot Game.
The blame game
Whose fault is it really?
BY JUDITH A. RUCKI
Classic movie buffs may remember the film noir Gilda, which featured the song “Put the Blame on Mame.” It facetiously blames a woman named Mame with causing everything from the Great Chicago Fire of 1871 to the fictional shooting of Dan McGrew during the Yukon Gold Rush. It was all in good humor but, in real life, misplaced blame can be toxic.
Blaming another person for our own mistakes or shortcomings is called deflection. We may use such defensiveness as a coping skill to avoid taking responsibility for our own actions.
The editorial team at BetterHelp, an online therapy service, says denial—or avoiding unacceptable or unpleasant thoughts and feelings—is the first line of deflection. When someone is in denial, they fail to recognize or accept truths or feelings about a situation.
Blame-shifting, or “passing the buck,” means justifying the conclusion that someone other than oneself is responsible for an undesired outcome. We often see this in the workplace. A colleague makes a mistake, but rather than admitting fault, they blame the boss for pressuring them or accuse someone of providing wrong information. Hiding the mistake is a means of saving face or avoiding punishment.
Author Michael Timms, writing in
Harvard Business Review, says, “We may not cause all our own problems, but our past actions or inactions often contribute to the problems of our future, the ones that we are most likely to blame on others. Anytime you encounter a problem—even one you are certain was caused by someone else—ask yourself questions: How may I have contributed to this problem? How can I approach this situation, this person, and myself, with a generous mindset?”
People also blame others in relationships. Mental health blog Harley Therapy examines why and the cost we pay. “Blaming people, especially those close to us, when things don’t go well can have a severely damaging effect on our relationships, families, and career,” says mental health and wellbeing expert Andrea M. Darcy, who points out that blaming can be a form of status seeking by social comparison, i.e. if we blame someone, it puts us in the superior seat, making us feel more important, and “the ‘good’ person as opposed to their ‘bad.’” Some blamers also seek to afford themselves victim status, a “poor me” position that makes them appear as “good” people.
“Whether you use blame to be superior or a victim, both come from a lack of self-esteem,” says Darcy. “The question to ask might even be not so much ‘why am I blaming,’ so much as ‘why do I feel so bad about myself I have to blame others to feel better?’” So if we find ourselves finger pointing, how can we stop? Writer William Cho tells us that we have two ways of looking at things: “We can either look around to see who we can blame or we can look within and see if we had a part to play in bringing about the misfortune.” He reminds us that we are sovereign individuals capable of transcending our weaknesses, traumas, and limitations. We must be conscious of wanting to blame others and replace that urge with the deliberate thought to focus on things we can control.
In an article written for Medium, Cho quotes author Richard Carlson: “When you stop blaming others, you will regain your sense of personal power. You see yourself as a choice maker. You will know that when you are upset, you are playing a key role in the creation of your own feelings. This means that you can also play a key role in creating new, more positive feelings. Life is a great deal more fun and much easier to manage when you stop blaming others.”
FY
Judith A. Rucki is a public relations consultant and freelance writer.
Take a trip to Angelica, New York A Victorian time machine
J. PARISI
Daytripping to a small and picturesque town can be the perfect respite, a day of immersive discovery, shopping, and nature. Angelica is a great getaway with its charming Main Street lined with local businesses, an intact nineteenthcentury town square, and annual festivals and events taking place year-round.
The seventy-three mile, oneand-a-half-hour drive from Buffalo to Angelica is largely filled with glorious views of rolling hills, other small towns, and old-growth forests. Angelica is about thirty minutes from historical Genesee Valley Trail Towns like Cuba, Nunda, and Mount Morris. Letchworth State Park is the same distance from the town and Belfast (celebrating its bicentennial in 2024) is just up Route 16. The town of Swain, famous for the ski resort of the same name, and Allegany State Park are both forty-five minutes from Angelica. Near a tributary of Genesee River, Angelica has a historic wooden bridge at the edge of town that is worth a look/ photo—Wooden Arch Bridge, also known as the Alton A. Sylor Memorial Bridge, near Joncy Gorge Park. Put 505 West Main Street into GPS to locate both. Holding the record for the longest clear-span timber bridge in the United States, the beautiful bridge was opened officially in 2003 and is
sought after by “bridge hunters” who walk amongst us.
Angelica welcomes visitors with its slogan “A Town where History Lives” and is a petite town in the heart of Allegany County, the oldest town in the county with a population of under 1,800. The namesake of Angelica is the very same Angelica immortalized in the musical “Hamilton” by LinManuel Miranda—Angelica Schuyler Church, the socialite sister-in-law of Alexander Hamilton.
Angelica’s son, Philip Schuyler Church, a judge and landowner, settled the area in 1802 and then founded the town in 1805. In his plans for the town, he called for a design incorporating an ample central park surrounded by a circular roadway and ringed with five churches, and the town hall—reminiscent of Paris at that time.
The town park has a prominent gazebo, places to sit, and, in summertime, is Roque-ready with a
library, open Tuesday-Saturday, has quiet spots to sit and read; free lectures are listed on the library calendar.
Along Main Street visitors will find one of the most popular attractions in town, Angelica Country Store & Antiques (angelicacountrystore.com), located at 50 West Main Street in a building from 1830. It has two floors of handmade gift items, antiques, some locally produced food. The store is open Thursday through Sunday from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. Be sure to stop and make an image with Brutus, the cow statue/ mascot and check to see if there is any famed salt rising bread, an Angelica delicacy made with cornmeal instead of yeast–a dense and aromatic loaf, sliced.
Other visit-worthy antique shops also along Main Street include Delectable Collectibles (find the shop on Facebook) at 95 West Main Street, packed with a massive array of vintage goods like toys, housewares, and curiosities. Rokosha, a great place for coffee, baked goods, and light fare, is across Main Street from the country store, open Thursday-Saturday (rokosha.com). Seek out their hearty breakfast sandwiches, pretty macarons, and wee individual pizzas.
court with wickets ready for play. Roque (pronounced roke) is the American/ Angelican version of croquet, played on a hard surface with a short border wall so the balls may rebound on shots. Roque was, according to the town website, popular in the early twentieth century and was an Olympic sport in the 1904 summer games. Today Angelica hosts Roque tournaments the first weekend of August during annual Heritage Days Festival.
The park circle hosts a weekly farmers market (angelicafarmersmarket.com) on Saturdays in summer and through September 28, from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m.
Local farms, bakers, and craftspeople sell their wares under the tall trees.
The regal Angelica Free Library, like other small-town libraries, can be a great place to pop into, as many times the local library also serves as a history museum and consulate of sorts, displaying local artifacts, and staffed by locals who may answer questions about the town (angelicafreelibrary.org). The
Built in 1805 and located at 128 West Main Street, American House and Hotel (find it on Facebook) opens daily except Mondays and is a reliable place for lunch, dinner, or happy hour. The menu is teeming with WNY classic menu items: wings, burgers, and Friday fish fry.
STORY AND PHOTOS BY NANCY
Two Angelica festivals are worth noting and visiting—in springtime and in mid-summer. The 16th Annual Angelica Lavender Festival and “Lavender-inspired market” held the first Saturday of July in the town park features over 70 local vendors (find it on Facebook). As a live band plays in the gazebo, festival attendees meander and
shop for food items, and handmade gifts, learn a craft, and more.
In the early spring Cartwright’s MapleTree Inn (cartwrightsmapletreeinn. com), located at 4321 County Road/15A just outside of Angelica, taps their trees and–since 1963–has served all-you-can-eat buckwheat pancakes (great grandma Cartwright’s
recipe) from roughly mid-February through mid-April, according to Cartwright’s website and the maple production season. People come from all over the country to queue up and get a table or counter spot (the latter is highly recommended to watch the pancake-making happen, as well as the creative ordering system explained
by a server) to eat flapjacks, and other breakfast menu items. The fresh maple syrup from the farm is nectar of the tree gods. FY
J. Parisi is a Buffalo-based photographer and writer.
Nancy
The delights of Stratford
A quaint getaway close to home
BY JENNIFER MERRICK
Spotlight Stage Series
Tonawandas Gateway Park along the Erie Canal 7:00 to 9:00 p.m.
FREE Theater & Variety Entertainment Fridays in the Tonawanda Canal Street Pavilion
8/9 - Friends of Harmony 8/23 - Disney Night – Music & Disney characters
BY: Weekly Drawings for Door Prizes
August 9 - Webster Bistro Dinner Theater Package. Food & beverages from Webster’s menu served at the Gateway Pavilion in Tonawanda Call 716-264-4314 for reservations.
WEDNESDAY CLASSIC ROCK CONCERTS - 6:00 - 10:00 pm
8/7 - Thurman Brothers (Allman Brothers Tribute) & Dave Viterna Band
8/14 - Boys of Summer & Mo Porter 8/21 - Hair Nation & Dave Constantino Band
8/28 - Hit N Run & Boogie Monsters FREE ADMISSION - Donations appreciated
Imagine yourself applauding a production at Stratford Festival, then strolling along the meandering Avon River. A tranquil scene unfolds as paddleboaters feed majestic swans and picknickers enjoy scrumptious nosh. A block away, shoppers pop into specialty stores and cafes while admiring Victorian-style architecture, particularly the monumental Stratford City Hall that presides over the small town. This may sound like you’re across the pond at Shakespeare’s birthplace, but you’re in fact only 135 miles away in Stratford, Ontario. In about two-and-a-half hours, this scene can become your reality.
The play’s the thing
Stratford Festival is the town’s star attraction. Established in 1953, this repertory event attracts 1.7 million visitors each year to enjoy performances of Shakespeare plays, Broadway musicals, and contemporary works. This year’s line-up of twelve productions includes Romeo and Juliet, Twelfth Night, La Cage aux Folles, Hedda Gabler, and the family friendly, Wendy and Peter Pan. Festival season runs April to October and brings with it a vibrant, artistic atmosphere.
“The energy changes during theater season,” says Mandy Sinclair, a Stratford spokesperson. “And you never know who you’re rubbing shoulders with.
But as electric as the theater is, there’s a lot more to do in Stratford.”
The Chocolate Trail
“It’s always time for chocolate,” reads the sign in front of Rheo Thompson Candies, and that’s especially true on the chocolate trail. Purchase a pass at the visitor’s center and get six vouchers for chocolatey goodies at twenty retailers. Rheo’s is a popular stop with handcrafted truffles, bark, and caramels. Its Mint Smoothie chocolates have a cult-like following and inspired the smooth mint liquor concocted at Junction 56 Distillery— one of the options on the trail. Other stellar choices include squares at Black
Jonathan Mason as Romeo and Vanessa Sears as Juliet in Romeo and Juliet. Stratford Festival 2024.
Photo by David Hou
Angus Bakery and retro chocolate bars at Small-Mart General Mercantile.
The world’s smallest theater
With only twelve seats, Little Prince Micro-cinema has been certified by Guinness World Records as the tiniest movie theater. Tickets cost $12.
Local cuisine
Stratford is surrounded by farmland so its chef-centric restaurants pride themselves on serving up fresh, local food. Recommended spots include Revival House, situated in a historic church; the Common for an eclectic international menu; and Revel Café for house-made sweet and savory pastries. If you time your visit right, you can take a cooking class at Stratford Chef School or a chocolate-making workshop at Chok Fine Chocolates in the nearby hamlet of Shakespeare.
Stratford Perth Museum
This historic mansion hosts exhibits on the town’s railway, the Stratford Shakespeare Festival, military history, and a more recent display honoring
Original accommodations
Stratford is known for bespoke stays, especially its B&Bs and inns. Bruce Hotel, Mornington Rose Bed Guest House, and Inn at Rosehurst are just a few. If you prefer a chain, Arden Park Best Western Plus is a good choice. For something unexpected, try Edison Inn; few people know that the prolific inventor lived in Stratford briefly, and you can stay where he did in the beautifully renovated building,
which has only three guest suites. One of them—the Swan Suite—overlooks the Avon River, where perhaps you strolled after applauding a production at Stratford Festival. FY
Jennifer Merrick is an award-winning freelance writer, photographer, and avid traveler based in Toronto.
town celebrity heartthrob Justin Bieber. The displays dedicated to the famous pop singer offer a window into his life from humble beginnings busking on the stairs of City Hall to his catapult to superstardom.
“We’ve had people come from as far away as Brazil just to see this exhibit,” says a museum staffer, who added that many others came for the historic exhibits.
Revival House Photo by Jennifer Merrick
Photo by Jennifer Merrick
Doctors as authors
Two locals publish non-fiction
BY AMY LYNN HARDY
North Tonawanda native Dr. Jeffrey Smalldon, a forensic psychologist, and Amherst psychologist Dr. Frank Alabiso have each recently published non-fiction books that offer enthralling accounts of aberrant human nature that emanated from their fields.
Smalldon’s That Beast Was Not Me: A Forensic Psychologist Looks Back On Five Decades of Murder
releases this month from Black Lyon Publishing. It chronicles Smalldon’s fascination and personal/professional
relationships with serial killers— including some of America’s most notorious like Charles Manson,
Squeaky Fromme, Ted Bundy, John Wayne Gacy, and Donald Harvey— through five decades of memories and letters exchanged between the author and the killers.
“I chose That Beast Was Not Me as my title for two reasons,” Smalldon says. “First, it speaks to the fact that most serial and mass killers are reluctant to submit to other people’s definitions of who they are. Second, the words hint at all the problems and complications that arise whenever people try to precisely locate the boundary that separates the worst of us—the murderers I write about— from everyone else. That theme runs like a leitmotif throughout my entire book. Who are these people? And who are we?”
As a child, Smalldon moved frequently with his family—his
Dr. Jeffrey Smalldon photo courtesy of Dr. Jeffrey Smalldon
Dr. Frank Alabiso photo courtesy of Dr. Frank Alabiso
father was an FBI agent—which led to him becoming an outsider who became interested in other “outsider” personalities. “The nature of my dad’s work meant that all throughout my childhood, I was exposed at
home to a low background hum of talk about crime and criminality,” points out Smalldon, who adds that the goal of his PhD in psychology was to “secure a close vantage point from which to study the minds and motivations of murderers.”
In his senior year of college, Smalldon began corresponding with Manson and some of his followers. As a graduate student, he corresponded with Ted Bundy on death row in Florida, and also spent twenty hours in a death row visiting room with John Wayne Gacy, who, at the end, stated his only regret was getting caught. The book contains these and more riveting exchanges with serial killers.
Alabiso’s book Lillian: A True Story of Multiple Personality Disorder was published in June 2023 by Austin Macauley Publishers and recounts the diagnosis and recovery of Lillian Mason who was living in Niagara Falls, N.Y. at the time of her Multiple Personality Disorder discovery. The book asks, “What happens when
United Church Manor to host annual theme basket auction and luncheon
The United Church Manor, a fiftyunit housing community sponsored by UCHS, Inc., is busy preparing for their annual “Baskets and Brunch” fundraiser on Saturday, November 2, at The Columns Banquets in Elma, NY. We invite the public to join us! The event features a basket and silent auction in addition to a delicious buffet lunch. For more information or tickets please call 716-668-5804.
Proceeds from the event will provide our senior and disabled residents with transportation to shopping, holiday parties, and a variety of resident activities and programs that assist residents with maintaining their independent lifestyles.
United Church Manor provides affordable housing opportunities to those with very-low incomes. Located on beautiful, park-like
the components of memory (facts, feelings, and body states) are split apart and no longer relate to each other?” and includes decades of reflections and notes collected by both Alabiso and Lillian’s aunt, Jean Baker Reynolds.
As a child, Mason suffered severe abuse and trauma, and her mind held each trauma separately in twentytwo disparate personalities. Baker Reynolds, an editor and proofreader for U.S. naval publications, met and explored these multiple personalities and dedicated ten years to Lillian’s recovery; over time, the personalities integrated, effectively allowing Lillian to conquer her disorder.
Alabiso became acquainted with Lillian through private practice. While treating Lillian’s ten-yearold son James, Alabiso encountered many of Lillian’s personalities, both male and female, who attended James’ treatments in Lillian’s stead. Alabiso draws from these sessions, Baker Reynolds’ shared notes, as
well as from journal entries written by Lillian’s personalities. Alabiso was so inspired by Lillian’s triumph over Multiple Personality Disorder that he dedicated an entire book to the experience of overseeing her recovery. It is a beautifully written account of poverty, transgenerational abuse, mental illness, and the healing power of love, science, and spirituality. Alabiso practices in Amherst. Find out more about this incredible story at lillianmemoirs.com.
Smalldon will be hosting two upcoming events—one at 4 p.m. on August 19 at the North Tonawanda Public Library (505 Meadow Drive, North Tonawanda) and one at 6 p.m. on August 22 at the North Tonawanda History Museum (712 Oliver Street, North Tonawanda). Both books are available for purchase on amazon.com as well as jeffreysmalldon.com and austinmccauley.com FY
Amy Lynn Hardy is a former teacher and freelance writer.
grounds on North Avenue in West Seneca, United Church Manor proudly assists residents in remaining independent, while aging in place with grace and dignity. In addition to updated, open-concept one-bedroom and studio apartments, residents can enjoy a reading library with computer and internet access, a lunch program, on-site laundry, beautiful outdoor patios, and a private picnic grove. Small pets are welcome. All residents have access to a Service Coordinator who links them to services available in the community.
Apartment rents are based upon individual incomes and eligibility restrictions apply. Heat and hot water are included in the rent. For more information about United Church Manor visit us online at ucmanor.org or call 716-668-5804.
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Living with
An abbreviated history— and signs of exposure
BY JOHN SZALASNY
Exposure to lead has been in the news periodically since the 2014 Flint Water Crisis, which happened when a change in the city water source quickly contaminated drinking water with lead levels well above “safe” limits determined by the Environmental Protection Agency.
It had been assumed that toxic lead levels were the result of gradual accumulation; the Flint crisis demonstrated how fast lead levels can increase in the body. The news stories focused on the effects of lead on developmental issues in newborns and toddlers; less frequently reported are the effects on adults.
Lead is an easy metal to melt and mold into shape, which is why it was the choice to make pipes to transport water through cities as far back as the Roman Empire. And as far back as that, lead has been linked to negative health impacts.
Today, our exposure is nowhere near the levels experienced by Romans who ate off lead plates and drank from lead-lined cups. It’s not even anywhere near the peak exposure in the seventies, when—starting with paint and gasoline—lead was phased out of consumer products manufactured in the United States. These efforts paid off. In 1965, Americans tested for lead had 100 times the expected norm in their bloodstreams; by the end of the twentieth century, longterm studies showed blood lead levels decreased by eighty percent, and children tested in this study showed increased IQs and fewer behavioral issues.
Even with this phase out, legacy lead issues still abound. Older cities, like Buffalo, have water supply lines that include lead piping. Money to identify and address the hidden infrastructure issues are coming from state and federal sources, but it could take decades to replace all lead water supply lines. Homes built before 1986 are likely
to have lead components, likely in paint and plumbing, even where there is copper piping because copper solder often included lead. Newer homes can also have lead if radon is detected, as radon is a radioactive element that decays into lead. If it’s in the soil surrounding a home, it can also get into the well; if your rural home is using well water, it’s likely to have lead.
If you’ve changed location, i.e. because of downsizing in senior years, and you notice changes in mood or cognition, consider lead as a potential cause. Other symptoms may include abdominal pain, constipation, and tingling in the hands and feet. The first step is to remove the source of contamination. If you have old, flaking paint, have a professional seal the walls to remove the contamination. If it’s in the water, have the water tested; if you find lead, you can filter your water before drinking.
For those with higher levels of exposure, medical treatment is available including chelation therapy, which uses a process that allows lead to be excreted in urine.
Don’t assume that any sudden changes in cognition or moods are a sign of age. Environmental changes may also be affecting your health. Make your health care provider aware of changes, including living arrangements, when you discuss changes in your physical and mental health. FY
John Szalasny writes about the environment in Western New York.
From the desk of WECK Radio owner and local business advocate Buddy Shula
END OF SUMMER?
In Buffalo, there is a conventional wisdom that when the Erie County Fair ends, summer ends. According to the calendar, that is not true, but it’s one of those unique Buffalo ways of thinking.
BIG WECK is just getting started with summer starting August 7th when the BIG WECK presents the incredible Happy Together Oldies Festival at the Erie County Fair Grandstand! We hope to see you there, and we also hope you can stop by and see us all ten days at the fair at our BIG WECK gazebo to win great prizes!
BIG WECK is Buffalo’s Oldies Station, on your radio at 1230am, 100.5fm, 100.1fm, and 102.9fm. Also listen to BIG WECK on your voice-activated devices, or download our free app on your mobile device. Thanks for listening this summer, and always remember to tune into the BIG WECK wherever you go.
Buddy Shula President /CEO
CLASSIFIEDS
All types including Grandfathers. Free In-Home Estimate, Pick Up, Deliver. Call or Text: 716-418-2773.
AD DEADLINE IS NO LATER THAN AUGUST 14TH FOR THE SEPTEMBER ISSUE. To Place your ad Call NOW! 783-9119 X2220
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Forever Young readers: we want to hear from you! Do you know someone who deserves to be recognized? Tell us more. Do you have a story you’d like to share? Drop us a line. We want to devote space in Forever Young to what matters most: you. Send your story ideas to mdoxtad@ foreveryoungwny.com. CLOCK REPAIR
AUGUST 8
Little Journey Speaker Series: Grace Meibohm and Constance Payne
Hosted at the Roycroft Inn by the Roycrofters-at-Large, the Little Journeys Speaker Series connects Roycroft Artisans with the community through artist talks, demonstrations, and lectures. On August 8, Grace Meibohm of Meibohm Fine Arts and Artist Constance Payne will present a Little Journey to the World of Alexis Fournier and celebrate his forty-year career. Space is limited; visit ralaweb.com for reservations and additional details.
6-7 p.m. in the Salon of the Roycroft Inn (5 p.m. happy hour in the Lounge) (40 S. Grove Street, East Aurora; ralaweb.com)
AUGUST 20
Bachelors of Broadway: Gentlemen of the Theatre
This brand-new three-man show includes songs from modern and classic musicals like Wicked, The Phantom of the Opera, Jersey Boys, 42nd Street, Miss Saigon, The Greatest Showman, Dear Evan Hansen, Les Misérables, and more.
Join Gardens Buffalo Niagara for the fourth annual installment of this special event that features a self guided tour of urban farms as well as talks, tours, and markets. Learn more and find the map online.
10 a.m.-3 p.m. (various sites; urbanfarmday.com)
AUGUST 23-24
Northwest Jazz Festival
The Northwest Jazz Festival in historic Lewiston returns to highlight local, international, and North American jazz artists. General admission is free, though $40 tickets are available for preferred seating at the Main Stage.
Friday, 5-10:30 p.m.; Saturday, noon-10:30 p.m.
(895 Center Street, Lewiston; lewistonjazz.com)
AUGUST 24-25 FREE
Elmwood Village ArtFest
See art, do art, be art along Elmwood Avenue between Bird and West Ferry. Saturday, 11 a.m.-6 p.m.; Sunday, 11 a.m.-5 p.m. (Elmwood Avenue; elmwoodvillageartfestival.com)
Alexis Fournier image courtesy of Roycrofters-at-Large Association; Bachelors of Broadway image courtesy of EPIC Arts Management; Urban Farm Day photo by Jay Jinge Hu courtesy of Gardens Buffalo Niagara; Jazz Festival photo courtesy of Northwest Jazz Festival; Elmwood Village ArtFest photo courtesy of Elmwood Village Association.
