Forever Young January 2020

JANUARY 2020 |

FREE

Western New York’s FREE Monthly Magazine For Adults 50+, With More Than 85,000 Readers

Rediscover Your Roots Finding ancestors and answers through genealogy Using essential oils | Happy birthday Rick James | Florida Keys getaway

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HBD, Rick James!

10

Find your roots

16

Wastin' away again

24

On the cover: A vintage photo of Walter Stenton Jr. and his wife, Stella, parents of Forever Young writer Kathy Schlaich Photo courtesy of Kyle Schlaich

Home & Garden 6

Features: Genealogy Tools & Resources

Winter Scents............................................ Carol Ann Harlos

18 Polish Society..........................................Christine Smyczynski

Let's Talk About...

7

20 Ancestry and More.......................................Kathy Schlaich

The New Sexual Revolution..............................Judith A. Rucki

Arts 8

16 Buffalo Library .................................................Judith A. Rucki

22 The Buffalo Museum of History................ Rick Falkowski

Getaways

January Theater.................................................Donna Hoke

10 Celebrating Rick James................. Wendy Guild Swearingen

24 Florida Keys "Disease"............................ Jennifer Merrick

Being Well 26 What Are You Eating?................................ Catherine Stack

Ever y Issue: Calendars 3 | Crossword 5 | Bingo Buzz 12 | Classifieds 28 | Noteworthy 29

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EDITOR’S NOTE OUR 32ND YEAR 1738 Elmwood Avenue, Suite 103 Buffalo, NY 14207 Phone 716.783.9119 Fax 716.783.9983 www.foreveryoungwny.com

PUBLISHER

Barbara E. Macks Editor-In-Chief............................................................................Elizabeth Licata

elicata@foreveryoungwny.com

Editor......................................................................... Wendy Guild Swearingen wswearingen@foreveryoungwny.com

Creative Director..................................................................... Jean-Pierre Thimot Production Director........................................................................ Jennifer Tudor

jtudor@foreveryoungwny.com

Production Manager......................................................... Adam Van Schoonhoven Lead Designer............................................................................ Nicholas Vitello Senior Graphic Designers.............................................. Josh Flanigan, Kim Miers,

Andrea Rowley Graphic Designer........................................................................ Kristen Thomas Director of Marketing & Sales........................................................... Brittany Frey

bfrey@foreveryoungwny.com

Intern...........................................................................................Natalie Short

Director of Advertising............................................................. Barbara E. Macks

bmacks@foreveryoungwny.com Director of Audience Development & Sales Coordinator.................... Robin Lenhard Senior Account Executives..................................... Mary Beth Holly, Keren Green, Caroline Kunze, Robin Kurss, Robin Lenhard, Betty Tata, Lori Teibel National Ad Director...................................................................... Terri Downey Administrative & Finance Director.......................................................................Michele Ferguson Classifieds Sales............................................................................... Robin Kurss BUFFALO SPREE PUBLISHING, INC.

President & CEO....................................................................... Sharon C. Levite Publisher/Chief Revenue Officer............................................... Barbara E. Macks Associate Publisher/Editor-In-Chief............................................... Elizabeth Licata Vice President/Production & Advertising.......................................... Jennifer Tudor Vice President/Administrative & Finance.....................................Michele Ferguson Corporate Counsel....................................................... Timothy M. O’Mara, Esq. Forever Young is published monthly, with an annual Senior Directory. Copyright ©2020 by Buffalo Spree Publishing, Inc. 1738 Elmwood Avenue, Suite 103, Buffalo, NY 14207 and is open Mon.–Fri. 8:30 a.m.–5 p.m. The entire contents of Forever Young are copyrighted 2020 by Buffalo Spree Publishing, Inc. and may not be reproduced in any manner, either whole or in part without written permission from the publishers. All rights reserved. Display advertising information and rates may be obtained by calling (716) 783-9119 ext 2250. For home delivery by mail, send check or money order for $12.00 payable to Forever Young. Standard mail postage paid at Buffalo, NY 14207. POSTMASTER send change of address to Forever Young, 1738 Elmwood Avenue, Suite 103, Buffalo, NY 14207. Manuscripts and free calendar listings should be sent to the editor (wswearingen@foreveryoungwny.com) at 1738 Elmwood Avenue, Suite 103, Buffalo, NY 14207. Material cannot be returned unless accompanied by a self addressed, stamped envelope of adequate size and strength. The publisher does not take responsibility for the accuracy or legitimacy of the advertising message or any aspect of the business operation or conduct of the advertisers in the paper.

This publication is a member of the North American Mature Publishers Association.

Membership in NAMPA includes verification of member’s print & circulation totals.

2

www.foreveryoungwny.com | January 2020

From the Editor

We're often encouraged to make resolutions in January. "New year, new you!" we hear on talk shows and read in magazines. But, this January, we decided to take a look back—way back.

There has been an enormous increase in genealogical interest in the last decade or so. Shows like Who Do You Think You Are—which follows the journeys of some of the most well-known names in American popular culture as they discover unknown details about themselves and their families while researching their ancestry with the help of historians and genealogical experts— are popping up with frequency.

Now, folks can even order genetic tests online and learn where their ancestors lived, when they came to the United States (or colonies, if it was a long time ago), and maybe even connect with living relatives they didn't know they had.

We're lucky in Buffalo to have experts who are happy to help guide people in their search for their past.

From the Buffalo & Erie County Public Library to the The Buffalo History Museum to various ethnic clubs, there are myriad resources to get you started and help guide you on your way to finding your own history.

I'd love to hear from you if you've done some genealogical research— and if you've discovered something surprising! Happy New Year!

Never miss an issue of Forever Young!

Call 972-2238 to subscribe today for just $12/year.

Facebook @ForeverYoungWNY

Wendy Guild Swearingen wswearingen@foreveryoungwny.com 783-9119 ext. 2253

FOREVER YOUNG JANUARY CALENDAR Ongoing

Erie County STAY FIT DINING PROGRAM offers a hot noon meal at 45 locations in Erie County. Menus and site list at erie.gov/stayfit or 858-7639.

Gowanda HEALTH COMMUNITY ALLIANCE Activities open to the public age 50+, (no residency requirements), Concord Senior Center, 1 School Street, Gowanda; for schedule visit communityalliance.org; 5321010, or beemana@hcanetwork.org Niagara Falls SENIOR COMPANION/FOSTER GRANDPARENT PROGRAM Looking for seniors who enjoy working with their peers or children. Volunteers receive a tax-free stipend, transportation assistance, and supplemental insurance coverage while volunteering. If you are 55+, have a minimum of 15 hours per week to give, and want to make a difference, contact Nora Aloian (SCP) at 285-8224 ext. 217or Jennifer Britton (FGP) at 285-8224 ext. 228 Williamsville MEDICARE EDUCATION PROGRAM offers complimentary services through the WNY Medicare Resource Center.

Appointments encouraged, 833-0252

1+ Orchard Park TAI CHI

Classes are Wednesdays at 1 pm. 8-week session costs $30. Orchard Park Senior Center, 70 Linwood Ave., Ph: 6626452.

1 Williamsville WOMEN’S

LYMPHEDEMA SUPPORT GROUP 5:45 p.m. the first Wednesday of each month. Sheridan Surgical room, 4510 Bailey Ave., Williamsville. Call 908-4149

1, 15 West Falls MEMORY CAFE

A gathering place for friends with Alzhiemer's and their caretakers. 1011:30 a.m. the 1st and 3rd Wednesday each month, with free refreshment and concerts11:30 a.m.-–1 p.m. West Falls Center for the Arts, Center, 1863 Davis Rd., info: westfallsartcenter.org or 5706520

1

Amherst FREE RESPITE CARE PROGRAM, 10:30 a.m.–2:30 p.m., Trinity Old Lutheran Church 3445 Sheridan Drive. First Wednesday of the month, for those caring for loved ones with Alzheimer’s or any form

of dementia. A morning snack and nutritious lunch are provided. Info: 8364868

1+

Boston HATHA YOGA Wednesdays at 7 pm. Gentle and meditative. Bring your own mat. Faith United Church of Christ, 8651 Boston State Road, Boston, NY. For more info call church office 716-941-3529

1+ Orchard Park

TAI CHI

Advanced Tai Chi in the Park at Brush Mountain, Wednesdays at 1 p.m. Build endurance, increase flexibility and balance. New students are welcome.

Contact the Orchard Park Senior Center at 662-6452 for information.

Cost is $30 for a 8-week session

4+ Lockport T.O.P.S. 9259

Meets every Saturday morning at 8:30 for weigh-in and 9 am.. for weekly meetings, Christ Episcopal church 7145 Fieldcrest Dr., Lockport.

Offers tools, programs, support and friendship for healthy living and weight management. Contact: Wendy, 200-2618 or Mary, 433-1693

4

Niagara Falls NIAGARA FALLS SINGLES SOCIAL CLUB, An active

50+ crowd, Game Night 1st Saturday of each month,Wheatfield; contact for location or for more info 550-1232

5+

Buffalo MEDITATION, 2:30 p.m., El Buen Amigo, 114 Elmwood Ave. Free every Sunday. Meditation unites with creative arts and pain management. Practitioner Sondra Holland welcomes people of all ages. Wear comfortable clothes. For information, Sondra: 947-5092; store: 885-6343

2+, 7+

Tonawanda UKULELE SING ALONG Ukuleles provided during class. All levels welcome beginner–experienced Tuesdays 5:30 p.m. and Thursdays 1:30 p.m.

Brighton Place Library 999 Eggert Rd., Tonawanda. Call to register 3324375 $5 suggested donation

2 Holland FREE RESPITE CARE

First Thursdays, 10:30 a.m.–2:30 p.m. for those caring for loved ones with any form of dementia, lunch included.

Presented by Holland Methodist Church, 11699 Partridge Rd.; 3883150

2+

Akron T.O.P.S. CLUB Every Thursday, 5:30–6:45p.m. at the Akron/Newstead Senior Center, 5691 Cummings Rd. We offer tools, programs, support, fellowship and recognition for healthy living and weight management. For information call Diane 542-4980

2+

Tonawanda LAUGHTER YOGA Come as you are, just bring your laughter! Thursdays 11 a.m.

Brighton Place Library, 999 Eggert Rd., Tonawanda. FREE

2+

Cheektowaga T.O.P.S. MEETING, Thursdays at 9 a.m., St. Luke’s Lutheran Church, 900 Maryvale Dr. (corner of Union Road). Come for the love, support and friendship. For information, call Karen at 247-2334

2+, 7+ Orchard Park ZUMBA

Day and evening classes, Tuesdays at 6 p.m. and Thursdays at 11 a.m. $30 for an 8-week session. Orchard Park Senior Center, 70 Linwood Ave., Ph: 662-6452.

January 2020 | www.foreveryoungwny.com 3

FOREVER YOUNG JANUARY CALENDAR 6+

Tonawanda TONAWANDA TOPS CLUB #50 Weekly meetings on Mondays, weigh-in 6 p.m./meeting starts at 6:25 p.m., Zion United Church Koenig & Parker Tonawanda; 912-6875

6, 13, 20, 27

Hamburg GENTLE CHAIR YOGA Quiet the mind and improve strength, mobility, and balance. No prior yoga experience necessary. Light refreshments. FREE and open to the public. Reservations required, call 649-1205. Mondays, 1–2 p.m. at St. Francis Park, 5229 South Park Ave.

8

Williamsville MCGUIRE GROUP MEMORY CARE SUPPORT GROUPS: General Support Group is second Wednesday, 3 p.m. at Harris Hill Nursing Facility, 2699 Wehrle Dr., Williamsville; Daughters’ Support Group, 5 p.m.

Coordinated with the Alzheimer’s Association, with caregiving tips and coping mechanisms. Info: 632-3700 or mcguiregroup.com

9, 16

7+

Farnham T.O.P.S. CLUB weekly meetings held Tuesdays at Holy Cross Lutheran Church, 10633 Church St., starting at 9 a.m. Call 934-9619.

Orchard Park NEW HORIZONS MUSIC Calling all musicians interested in music. New Horizons Music meets in the daytime and is for people 50 & over. For info, email Janet Stout at 354janet@gmail. com and visit newhorizonsmusic.org.

Next practices 11 a.m. Jan. 9 & 16 at The Guitar Factory, 5455 Webster Rd., Orchard Park

7+

10

Tonawanda T.O.P.S. CLUB, weekly meetings on Tuesdays, 9:30 a.m. at Blessed Sacrament Parish, Claremont Avenue. For information, call 693-5161

7+

Kenmore UKULELE SING ALONG Ukuleles provided during class. All levels welcome beginnerexperienced. Tuesdays 8 p.m. Church of the Advent, 54 Delaware Rd., Kenmore $5 suggested donation. 4815735

7+

Buffalo TAI CHI FOR BETTER BALANCE 10:30 a.m. every Tuesday, Tosh Collins Senior Center, 35 Cazenovia St. $3 For more information, contact monicazucco@ gmail.com.

7+ Buffalo GENTLE YOGA, 11:15

a.m. Tuesdays at Tosh Collins Senior Center, 35 Cazenovia St. $3 Bring a yoga mat. Info: 828-1093

7, 21 Buffalo HEADWAY

SUPPORT GROUPS, 2635 Delaware Ave. For individuals who have sustained brain injuries, their families, and caregivers; exchange information and resources, and find mutual support and encouragement.

Peer Support (Suite B), first and third Tuesday, 6:30–8 p.m.; Caregivers Support (Suite B), first Tuesday, 6:30–8 p.m. Info: 408-3100 or headwayofwny.org 4

17

Niagara Falls NIAGARA FALLS SINGLES SOCIAL CLUB, An active 50+ crowd. Dances are the 3rd Friday of each month, 7 to 11 pm at Buffalo Social Club 2565 Young St., Niagara Falls. Monthly activites include Picnics, restaurants and parties. 50-50 raffles, and door prizes. FaceBook: SINGLES SOCIAL CLUB or call for more info 550-1232

21

Buffalo LGBTQ MEMORY LOSS CAREGIVERS PROGRAM: The Pride Center of WNY offers the LGBTQ Memory Loss Caregivers Program providing support and education for people providing care for a person with Alzheimer’s Disease and other dementias. Third Tuesday each month at 5:30 p.m., Pride Center, 200 South Elmwood Ave., Buffalo, 8527743 or pridecenterwny.org

DANCE CALENDAR MONDAYS

THURSDAYS

Sloan CLOGGING LESSONS

by Kickin’ Rhythm Cloggers, 6:30 p.m. @ St. Andrew’s Parish Hall, 111 Crocker St., Bldg. 1. (585) 457-4455.

Kenmore JACKIE’S THURSDAY NIGHT DANCES @ Brounshidle Post, 3354 Delaware Ave. Lessons: 7 p.m. Open dancing: 8 p.m. 691-8654.

Niagara Falls NIAGARA FALLS SINGLES SOCIAL CLUB, An active 50+ crowd, Meet & Greet, 2nd Friday of each month, 6 to 8 pm at Tim Hortons 8500 Niagara Falls Blvd. NF. Call for more info 5501232.

Buffalo HUSTLE FOR HEALTH URBAN LINE DANCING with Phyllis Caver at Gloria Parks: 3242 Main St, Buffalo. 12pm - 1pm. FREE for ages 55+ Call 832-1010 ext. 4

SATURDAYS

12

Buffalo LINDY FIX 8–10 p.m. @ Polish Cadets Hall, 927 Grant St. lindyfix.com, swingbuffalo.com.

East Aurora BREAD AND TULIPS Silvio Soldino directs this gentle comedy about a housewife who temporarily flees from the grinding tedium of her household duties and drifts into a world of amicable weirdosd. 4 pm. Roycroft Film Society, Roycroft Power House, 39 S. Grove St., East Aurora; roycroftcampuscorp. com. $6 members, $8 non-members

13

Hamburg ALZHEIMER’S CAREGIVER SUPPORT GROUP for males at Wesleyan Church, 4999 McKinley Pkwy. 2nd Tues. 626-0600, alz.org/wnyc

14

Orchard Park ALIENATED G R A N D P A R E N T S ANONYMOUS, INC., meetings 1 p.m. the second Tuesday of month, 4295 S. Buffalo St.

14

Depew BREAST CANCER NETWORK OF WNY Monthly meeting second Tuesday, 6 p.m., Bella Moglie Bldg., 3297 Walden Ave. Call 706-0060 or visit bcnwny.org.

Professional support group will be held at 8 p.m.

www.foreveryoungwny.com | January 2020

TUESDAYS

WEDNESDAYS

N. Ton. DANCING WITH DOTTIE AND FRIENDS country-style line lessons, 7:30 p.m. @ Pendleton Center Meth. Church, 6864 Campbell Blvd. 625-8306.

Buffalo HUSTLE FOR HEALTH URBAN LINE DANCING with Phyllis Caver at Gloria Parks: 3242 Main St, Buffalo. 11am- 12pm. FREE for ages 55+ Call 716 832 1010 Amherst AMHERST VICTORIAN DANCE SOCIETY Authentic music, dress and dance of Queen Victoria's time. New members and guests welcomed! 1st Wednesdays @ Buffalo Niagara Heritage Village in Amherst & 4th Wednesdays @ VFW Post in Village of Williamsville. 7:00 p.m. Info: Geraldine, 877-0222 or amherstvictoriandance.org

Buffalo HUSTLE FOR HEALTH URBAN LINE DANCING at East Community High School 820 Northampton St, Buffalo. 11:30am - 12:30pm. FREE for all ages. Free Lunch. Www.HustleforHealth.com

ONGOING

WNY BELLYDANCE CLASSES 560-1891, nadiaibrahim.com.

Kenmore JACKIE’S DANCE Monthly dance. Call 691-8654 for details.

WNY BALLROOM SOCIAL DANCE, Argentine tango and belly dance instruction with Carol Allen; N. Collins and Amherst. 337-3092 or callen8801@aol.com.

West Seneca BALLROOM DANCE classes @ 1761 Orchard Park Rd., 771-3110, ballroomiliana.com.

WNY DANCE W/ ERIN BAHN 997-7190 ARGENTINE TANGO IN BUFFALO Dancing & Classes. traviswidricktango.com.

Contact Travis @ 517-7047

CROSSWORD 21. Antediluvian

39. CrËme de cassis plus wine

22. Low in La Scala, pl.

40. Like Ferris Bueller

23. Relating to Quechuan people

43. Monet's water flower

24. Unstable mesons

45. Out of focus

25. Four-legged friends

47. Provide with gear

26. ____ Ligation

48. Cover with a story to tell?

27. All worked up

49. Beginner

28. Apple leftovers

50. Charlie Parker's sax

31. Multicolored horse

51. Golden Fleece ship

32. *Acronym that revolutionized TV- watching

52. Season to be jolly

35. But not always

54. *Air____, vehicle restraint

37. Like some suspects?

53. High school club 57. Freddie Krueger's street

THEME: 20TH CENTURY INVENTIONS ACROSS 1. Observation point's attraction

47. *Aspartame-based sweetener

5. Included for large parties?

49. Hard tale to believe

8. 252 gallons of wine

51. *Scuba diver's gear

11. Soprano's song, e.g.

54. "It's still Rock and Roll" to him

12. Pakistani tongue

55. The Colosseum, e.g.

13. Word with foster or health

56. Stage part

14. Lancelot and Mix-a-Lot

58. Bohemian

15. Unstable particle

59. Gold coating

16. Orangutan, biologically speaking

60. Fishing rod attachment

17. *Car safety invention

61. Sticky stuff

19. Caspian Sea, e.g.

62. Make a choice

20. They flock together?

63. Big Bang's original matter

21. "____ the ramparts..."

22. *RisquÈ garb named for atoll 25. *Bakelite was first one made from synthetics 29. RNs' org.

30. Like a pumpkin on Halloween 33. Ä 34. "To Kill a Mockingbird" protagonist 36. Columbus Day mo.

37. Unlock 38. Without, in Paris 39. Limestone landscape forms 41. Broke bread 42. *Synthetic for a diabetic

DOWN 1. Military hospitals 2. Fleur-de-lis 3. Irish word for Ireland 4. Sushi restaurant "burner" 5. Set straight 6. Objects of worship 7. Fourth down option 8. *Little Willie or T-34 9. Egg on 10. Opposite of paleo12. Perugia region

44. Putin's currency

13. Make less refined

46. *Willis Carrier's invention conditioned it

18. Touch of color

16. Court bargain

The solution for this month’s puzzle can be found on page 28.

January 2020 | www.foreveryoungwny.com 5

HOME & GARDEN

Making Scents of Winter Using essential oils

I

think that during the winter months, the scents of cinnamon rolls, homemade bread, a peeled orange, a cup of Earl Grey tea, and many other fragrances become all the more important. This may be because our bodies miss the smells of a garden or of the earth.

This may be a good time to try some essential oils that have been obtained from plants commonly grown in gardens. Usually, these come from commercial sources due to the large quantities of plants needed to make the oils. On average, it takes about a pound of plant material to produce a drop of essential oil! This also explains their expense. Essential oils are usually produced using some form of distillation. Steam carries the volatile chemicals away from the plant material. The steam is then condensed. Usually the essential oil

floats on top of the water produced by the steam condenser. Citrus oils, on the other hand, are produced by pressing.

Plants naturally produce essential oils for many reasons, perhaps the most important ones being for protection from being eaten or to attract pollinators. Some species of insects will avoid highly scented plant leaves like those found in herb plants. Other species of insects will be attracted to the flower nectaries.

Many bacteria and fungi won't grow on highly scented plants.

A COM M U NIT Y OF C A R IN G

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Brand new COMPLETELY renovated apartments!

Beautiful City Gardens Stay fit dining program w/ balanced hot meals 5 days a week!

On Site Parking Secure Building Spectacular Patio

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www.baptist-manor.org • All Faiths Welcomed 6

www.foreveryoungwny.com | January 2020

You’re probably familiar with several essential oils such as peppermint and hot pepper capsaicin, as they are commonly used in liniments. I remember my mom putting Vick's VapoRub on my chest and covering it with flannel when I had a cold as a child. I still remember the smell of eucalyptus, wintergreen, and menthol.

Let's look at essential oils. They are not really oily. Most are rather watery.

Some are thick and some are even solid. They may come from fruit, leaves, bark, seeds, buds, or roots. The neat thing about essential oils is that they are unique to each plant species.

The quantity and quality of essential oils from even the same species can vary depending on the plant's growing conditions.

Many people believe that the use of certain essential oils can affect our state of being. Some teach the medicinal value of essential oils. You probably have heard of aromatherapy.

Many people believe that lavender, sandalwood, and chamomile relieve tension. Others believe that the essential oils of basil, rosemary, and

CAROL ANN HARLOS orange relieve fatigue. Much of the purported medicinal effects of particular oils is anecdotal, but that shouldn't stop you from enjoying them.

You may be thinking, I have never bought a bottle of essential oil; how do I get started? Begin by concentrating on the fragrances that are already a part of your life. Consciously inhale the aroma from that cup of bergamot or peppermint tea (actually not a tea but a “tisane”). Do you have sage from your garden? Smell it. How does it make you feel?

Everyone loves the smell of lavender, so perhaps you would like to begin by purchasing a bottle of lavender oil. Be sure to read the label to make sure you are purchasing an essential oil rather than a synthetic.

The bottle containing the essential oil should be made of colored glass to keep out light. The species name of the plant should be listed on the label.

In the case of lavender, the species name should indicate that the oil came from Lavendula. Sprinkle some oil in a drawer or on a pillowcase. Add some to your bath water. You can add some to a neutral oil such as almond or other unscented oil. Try using some in a body massage. Experiment with new oils, but take care if you have allergies.

I am hoping that the world of aromatherapy will add a new dimension to your life. It may even make you interested in trying some new plants in your garden this year. FY I love hearing from you: caharlos@ herbgardener.net

LET’S TALK ABOUT...

The New Sexual Revolution

BY JUDITH A. RUCKI

T

rends tend to repeat themselves, so, if you missed the sexual revolution back in1960s, you may be in luck.

The original sexual revolution, also known as sexual liberation, was a social movement that challenged traditional codes of behavior. Women started questioning their old-style sexual roles and introduced the then-radical notion that women had sexual needs and enjoyed sex, just like men.

The advent of “The Pill” allowed women to control their fertility and explore their sexuality. Socially conservative agendas began falling to the wayside as the celebration of sexual exploration and the single life replaced virginity and marriage.

In 1962, Helen Gurley Brown wrote Sex and the Single Girl, a book that encouraged women to become financially independent and experience sexual relationships prior to, or without, marriage. Despite the early 1960s being a fairly conservative period, the book sold two million copies in just three weeks.

Jean M. Twenge, a psychology professor at San Diego State University, published a research paper in 2015 that concluded, “Between the 1970s to 2010s, Americans became more accepting of pre-marital sex.”

So, where are we in 2020? Most of us are now familiar with terms like “fluid sexuality,” hardly anyone raises an eyebrow at bisexuality, and samesex marriage is legal in all fifty states.

We also have professionals like Dr. Debra Laino, a sex therapist with a national clientele, who is known as “The Delaware Sex Doc.” If you check out yoursexdoc.com, you will find what she refers to as “really important quotes that I must say 100 times a week.”

For instance, Dr. Laino says, “Women, get in touch with your bodies. Know what feels good for you sexually, then ask it of your partner.”

She believes in keeping an open dialogue around needs and wants as well as likes.

Dr. Laino tells us that there is no “expiration date” to your sex life. “Yes, you can keep it sexy at every age of your life!” she stresses.

Experts note today’s adult women are finding ways to enjoy sex more.

They aren’t held back by what former generations would have considered unimaginable, not to mention illegal or immoral.

Back in the 1970s, there were "key parties." Several married couples would get together and have a party.

The husbands would place their keys into a large box or bowl. The wives would pick a set of keys and go home with the owner of the keys.

Now, tech geniuses have updated the concept. According to an online article by Ben Axelson, “The mobile device is the new key, and tech is connecting modern day high tech swingers … swingers are now using technology and mobile apps to plan, attend, and hook up at these parties.”

There are also "Skirt Club" parties.

Author Angelica Pronto, writing for Entity, says these parties are “an underground community for girls who play with girls.” For the most part, these clubs are a place for intimate and intellectual interactions. She adds, “However, even though Skirt

Club is about exploring sexuality, it’s not just about having sex. Sex comes last at these events … attendees don’t even have to have sex if they’re not comfortable.”

Sex hasn’t been a taboo subject in decades. Women often say they start having the best sex of their lives when they are in their late thirties. If their sex lives are not to their liking, women aren’t embarrassed to talk to their doctors or consult a sex therapist.

They are open about kegel exercises, using hormones that boost libido, lubricants, and vibrators.

In case all this has you wondering what is normal nowadays, a University of Michigan/AARP survey reported that 40 percent of individuals between ages 65 and 80 are sexually active.

Alison Bryant, senior vice president of research for AARP, says the survey confirms that the need for, and interest in, sexual intimacy doesn’t stop at a certain age.

The survey also showed that more than half of those surveyed reported that sex is important to their quality of life. Erica Solway, University of Michigan’s co-associate director of the poll, says, “Sex and sexual health among older adults doesn’t get much attention but is linked closely to quality of life, health, and well-being.”

Welcome to the revolution! FY Judith A. Rucki is a public relations consultant, freelance writer, and regular contributor to Forever Young.

January 2020 | www.foreveryoungwny.com 7

ARTS

January Theater Preview

BY DONNA HOKE

A

lleyway is back with another winner of the Maxim Mazumdar New Play Competition (2018), Factory for Murderers by Scott McCrea. A teacher of dramatic literature, acting, and theater at SUNY Purchase, McCrea is a prolific writer in all genres and has been produced around the country. He was happy to chat with us about his upcoming world premiere.

Forever Young: Describe the play in your own words.

Scott McCrea: The play is about people whose lives are affected by the Jack the Ripper murders in London in 1888—the women living in flophouses, wondering if they’ll be next; the Jewish immigrants, afraid

8

they’ll be blamed for the killings; the frustrated police, the merchants hoping to capitalize by selling souvenirs, etc. It especially focuses on a man whose commonlaw wife was one of the victims and a witness who may have glimpsed the killer minutes before a murder. Despite its

www.foreveryoungwny.com | January 2020

subject matter—or maybe because of its subject matter—there’s a lot of humor in the play. Some of the characters are the poorest people in their society, and they face their lives with courageous dark-comic wit.

Can you talk about the inspiration for the play and the challenges in writing it?

I got the idea for the play in the way I often get ideas for plays—from seeing a book on a shelf in a library or bookstore or someone’s house. In this case, it was a book about Jack

FOOD the Ripper. There are of course many plays and movies about the Ripper— there are twelve plays alone called Whitechapel—so the first challenge, or maybe question I had to ask myself, was do I have a fresh take on the material? Something other people had not done so it would make the project worth doing. What I discovered in reading books about the case was how prominent a role anti-Semitism played in the historical record.

There was a recent influx of Jewish immigrants fleeing the pogroms in Poland, Germany, and Russia, and a lot of suspicion and virulent hatred was directed at the “foreigners.” This struck me as very relevant to today in America, and I’d never seen that aspect of the story explored at all in other plays and movies. They seemed to focus on the police procedures, since that’s the best documented aspect of the case. The heroic lead Inspector Abberline, played by Johnny Depp and Michael Caine in the 2001 film From Hell, follows the clues to the Queen’s physician or a cousin of the royal family. My police detective, by contrast, is an anti-Semite, like some of the real law enforcement officers.

The other challenge was finding my way into the plot. As I said, the police as protagonist had been done.

I asked myself, what moves me about this subject? What really pulls at my heart? And I realized it was the friends and families of the victims. The bereaved. The collateral damage of the murderer. I learned that Catherine Eddowes, one of the victims, had a commonlaw husband named Jack Kelly, who seemed bereft at her inquest. I changed his name to Jack Donovan, to avoid confusion with the Ripper victim Mary Jane Kelly, and made him my main character. Now I had an emotional core at the center of my play.

What do you hope people will take away from this play?

I hope the audience identifies with these characters. One of the things I discovered in my research was that the Ripper’s victims were not Cockney prostitutes born into poverty, but people who had fallen on hard times.

At her inquest, Catherine Eddowes was described as “intelligent and scholarly”; Annie Chapman’s best friend said that Annie “seemed to be an educated person.” I hope they identify with the Ripper too, as a fellow human being. We’re all capable of horrible crimes and we commit little ones on a daily basis. A murderer is us under different circumstances. I hope the play makes the audience think about our own society, as the 1888 murders made the British government reconsider theirs. Is the society we have inevitable or can it be changed?

Does the life of most people have to consist of scrounging for money or is a different world possible?

How did you research? What were you looking for? What surprises did you find?

I read many books about the case and about the time period. I went to London to try to create an authentic sounding idiom for the play. I assumed the play would be produced in England, rather than the US, so I needed to create voices that were convincing to English people. Luckily, I have friends who are English to help me with that.

And the play was developed in New York by Cutting Hedge productions, a British/American theater company, with British ex-pat actors. I wanted the play to be as historically accurate as possible. The facts of the case are simply too well known to be able to cheat. I wanted the unfamiliar details to be factual—there really was “Jack the Ripper toffee”—unless the deviation from history is the point. It’s fiction, after all, not nonfiction. Joseph Lawende, one of my characters, was a German traveling salesman; I make him a British legal accountant because I needed the point of view of a Jewish Englishman.

There were many surprises in my research. For example, I learned the Ripper’s victims for the most part knew each other. They lived in the same two lodging houses. I learned that one in five women in London worked as full- or part-time prostitutes. The income inequality, lack of jobs, and social strictures, forced women to sell their bodies to survive.

Did the play turn out as you originally planned?

I do a lot of outlining when I write a play, so, in a sense, the play turned out as planned. I like to have the structure figured out and know the climax and ending, at least for the first act, before I start writing scenes. Still, things never go exactly as planned. I did not want to have my character Donovan join a vigilante group, because Woody Allen had done that in his one act play, Death, and the movie Shadows and Fog which is based on it. But Donovan joined anyway; it was just something his character would naturally have done, so I had to go with it.

OPENINGS January 10 Bridges of Madison County Based on the best-selling novel, this breathtakingly beautiful musical asks “What if...?” (kavinokytheatre.com, 881-7668)

January 16 The Antipodes Once upon a time, a group of writers gathered around a conference table in pursuit of the perfect untold tale: a story so epic, so truthful that it could change the world. (roadlesstraveledproductions.org, 629-3069)

Factory for Murderers In this world premiere, Jack the Ripper is terrorizing London, and one detective discovers a truth better kept unknown forever. The 2018 Winner of the Maxim Mazumdar New Play Competition. (alleyway.com, 852-2600)

January 17 Jump Jump is about flickering lights, vapes that fall from the sky, old homes, and a young woman who finds solace on a bridge.

Will you be coming to Buffalo for the rehearsal process?

No. I have found that unless I’m directing or producing the show, it’s better for my plays if I stay away.

Directors, actors, and designers need to find their own truths when working on a play. When they try to please me, I find it screws up their own visions and the production isn’t as organic. I’ll be seeing the show in January, like an audience member. And that’s how I hope to experience it. FY Playwright Donna Hoke writes about theater for Buffalo Spree and Forever Young.

January 24 The Mousetrap A group of strangers is stranded in a boarding house during a snowstorm—and one of them is a murderer. (lancopera.org, 683-1776)

Nunsense A-Men It’s the original Nunsense show, only all the characters are played by men! When the Little Sisters of Hoboken discover their cook has accidentally poisoned fiftytwo of the nuns, they are in dire need of funds for their burial.

The sisters decide that the best way to raise the money is to put on a variety show. (oconnellandcompany.com, 848-0800)

January 25 Miss Nelson Is Missing Uncontrollable students send the nice, gentle, long-suffering Miss Nelson over the edge. But the kids are in for a surprise when Miss Nelson goes missing and is replaced by scary Miss Viola Swamp! Based on the popular children’s book. (theatreofyouth.org, 884-4400)

(aaccbuffalo.org, 884-2013)

January 2020 | www.foreveryoungwny.com 9

ARTS

Celebrating a Local Musician’s Life and Work

Carmen Walker Sims holds birthday party for brother Rick James

BY WENDY GUILD SWEARINGEN

J

ames Ambrose Johnson Jr. (better known by his stage name Rick James), was an American singer-songwriter, multi-instrumentalist, and producer born Buffalo, New York, February 1, 1948. Rick James began his musical career in his teen years and enjoyed great success through the 1990s. He is perhaps best known for his seminal song, “Super Freak,” which was sampled by MC Hammer in the Grammy-winning “Can’t Touch This.” James passed away at his home in California August 6, 2004 and is buried in Forest Lawn Cemetery.

We recently spoke with Rick James’s brother, Carmen Walker Sims, who is holding a celebration of his late brother’s life and music on January 25 at 7:30 p.m. at the Millennium Hotel.

Tell us about the origins of the tribute to Rick James that you’ve planned.

It was based on keeping his name alive. I was listening to Prince’s stuff and how they were celebrating him and Michael [Jackson] after they passed. We don’t have the same thing for Rick James. Buffalo is really low key. I thought, let me start celebrating my brother’s birthday. That’d be nice.

Is this a fundraiser?

Yes. I was a counselor for about fifteen years for Alcohol and Drug Dependency Services, which was founded by Dick Gallagher, the same man who founded Kids Escaping Drugs and Renaissance House.

I figured I might as well kill two birds with one stone. I retired, but I want to keep my hand in. I intend to work through Renaissance House and donate whatever profits I get to that.

That’s what I’ve been aiming for. And that’s what I intend to do from here on out.

I ran halfway houses and supportive living—quite a bit of stuff in that area.

I’m certified by New York State. It’s called the CASAC—Certified Alcohol 10

and Substance Abuse Counselor.

I worked with families as well as individual clients. I have expertise and I know that need. That was one of the most needed job, and one of the lowest-paying jobs.

There is a great need. People don’t understand. There’s this vaping going on now. There’s always some gimmick to catch the kids. And it’s intentional.

They go right to our weakest link: the children.

We used to say, “You get tired of jumping in to save them when they’re way down the river. Let’s jump in and catch them before they get in.” I’ll be joining many others that are fighting that. Buffalo has a lot of good people.

We have a lot of bad people, too; all communities do. The work has got to be done from within. Nobody’s going to come from outside to do anything much for us.

Tell me about your family and your relationship with Rick.

There were eight of us, four boys and four girls; I’m the oldest. I worked for him for fifteen years; I did security— I’m a blackbelt—and a bunch of stuff.

My mother was a very strong woman, she raised us, basically, by herself.

My brother was proud of me. Sad to say, he couldn’t remain clean. And that was his choice, because he knew.

www.foreveryoungwny.com | January 2020

Rick James circa 2002 Featureflash Photo Agency / Shutterstock.com

He knew what he could do. That’s one thing I learned by watching him; you cannot mix business and pleasure like that. In that field, you either treat it like a business and go home, or else you get hooked into it and you’re on it all the time and you’re in trouble. And that was him.

Is that what prompted you to go into your line of work?

Yes, it did. When I worked with

him, I’m sad to say, I, too, joined those ranks. In fact, I have twenty-nine years clean. I’m in AA. When I changed up, I’d been fired—he fired me a bunch of timese—he fired me the last time, and I went to work with Teena Marie in California. And then I came back [to Buffalo] in 1989 or ‘90 and I started my recovery.

I used to go back out and talk to him. I’d never work back on the road, but I’d go out. And he was proud of

ARTS me. But he was not going to stop what he was doing, and it kind of hurt.

My mandate from my mother when I first when out to California was, “Don’t let your brother die.” And I went out—I didn’t let him die—but I joined the crew. It was sad; she was really hurt.

I have a lot of stuff that I’m paying back, in my own way. I’m dedicated.

I went back to school. I carry a bachelor’s degree. I did all that in recovery. I didn’t really have a high school diploma. I went to ECC, did a double course there. I went to Buff State.

I’ve lived many lives. I’ve been a busy guy, and not all of it’s been good.

I’m prouder of this last part of my life than I am the first part. Because I was not the best guy.

My brother never had a real-life job. I mean, he worked, but he was always a musician, he always did his thing. He knew that an organization could not function drugged out. He was going to do what he wanted to do, but he didn’t want his organization to be that way.

So, I think when he brought me out, he knew I had this thing—I drank, but I didn’t like drugs. We came from the projects, and I’d seen a lot of it. One place we stayed, we’d come out of our door and it would be on the top floor, and it smelled of blood all the time and you would see people on drugs.

He brought me out primarily to stem that, and I did a good job for a while. I kind of wondered why there wasn’t more resistance, because I was pretty hardnosed about it all. But they knew what I didn’t know: if you go to a barbershop, you’re gonna get a haircut. If you hang around those guys and you work in that atmosphere, it takes a very strong personality to do that. He thought my discipline and my [martial] arts would protect me from that. But I’d never been engaged in it like that. Pretty soon, I started experimenting. It hooked me, too.

My family has an addictive personality. I didn’t know that at the time. I thought I knew a lot, but I really didn’t. I got an education.

He told me that when I first came

out. He said, “You’re going to learn a lot, Carmen. A lot that you think you know.” And I said, “Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know.” The oldest always set the rules.

Oh, man. Did I get blindsided.

In the end, I came back, but I had to re-do my life. He saw me re-do it. He was very proud of me, but I couldn’t get him to stop.

When I’d go out to California and hang with him for a while, I’d try to get him to go to meetings. He was getting sicker. We have very strong gene, but not that strong. He started breaking down. That disease just tears you down. We used to say, it’s the great remover. It starts removing, first, your material self, it starts removing you physically, taking pieces from you and you don’t realize it. He had a couple strokes. I can’t count the times that I came in and sucked mucus out of him and turned him upside down and beat his chest.

It was hard to watch, I’m sure.

It was really hard to watch.

Especially after I was working on his team. I couldn’t stay around him. It wasn’t about me going and getting

Rick James Birthday Celebration Performances by Kenny Hawkins All Star Band, Teena Marie Tribute with Tonya Deion & special guest, Paul Anthony, Full of Force, Mike Porter with the Nickel City Band, and Oscar Rotten and his Blues Band of NoGoods Saturday, January 25 Millennium Hotel, 2040 Walden Avenue, Buffalo Doors open at 6 p.m.; showtime 7:30 p.m.

Tickets available for $25 in advance at Doris Records, Revolver Records, and Cool Beat Records; $35 at the door

back into that field and working with him. I realized I couldn’t do anything.

It was an inside job. All I could do was what I was doing. Talking to him.

And he used to laugh and blow smoke in my face. He was something.

You almost had to go through this in order to help other people.

Yes, I did. It kind of prepared me.

I used to use the tapes we're in from Behind the Music, Unsung, Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous. I used a lot of those, because everybody in the field knew who I was. It wasn’t like I was undercover. I used the tapes for therapeutic tools and show clients: this is what will happen to you. You think that you can do all this stuff and be all this to everybody? This is what will happen to you if you let that one thing enter your life. Anything that’s negative that you allow to take over your life or to become primary— you’re in trouble.

Some got the story, some didn’t.

They used to call me a bully. That was

just my style—it was hard love, really.

I loved them.

Is your whole family musical?

Yes. My mother sang and danced.

I thought I could sing a little bit, and I played saxophone and clarinet—I played the reed family. My brother Roy plays flamenco guitar. All my family was musically inclined. I never loved it like Rick loved it. I had other jobs, I had to work, and I never thought about it for a living. I wanted to, but I wasn’t that good. I was in small bands. I did sing a little bit. I had a pretty good voice. I looked at that business and it was hard. You had to be dedicated, and I was not that dedicated.

Was it surprise to your family when Rick’s career took off?

I was dubious. To my mother, no.

She always had faith. FY Wendy Guild Swearingen is editor of Forever Young

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www.foreveryoungwny.com | January 2020

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FEATURE

Register of the Erie County Alms House Photos courtesy of Rhonda Hoffman

Files of local Western New York/Buffalo history

Get Genealogical Help at the Library

BY JUDITH A. RUCKI

G

enealogy research, or the tracing of one’s ancestral history, can be a daunting task.

“Genealogy research is similar to detective work,” says Rhonda Hoffman, Librarian I and Genealogy Specialist at the Buffalo and Erie County Public Library. “Genealogists examine evidence, find clues, interview witnesses, formulate theories as to who their ancestors are, and then prove or disprove those theories.”

Hoffman’s advice is to start by writing down what is already known about your family. This is not just what you know, but also what you

can ascertain by talking to family members. She says names, locations, and dates are key, even if they are estimates.

Hoffman offers this example: “A family member may tell you, ‘Your great grandfather, John Jones, was born in the 1890s in the Hamburg

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area and died in Buffalo in the 1960s.

John’s wife was Elizabeth; she died in the 1970s. Their children were John, William, Mary, Susan, Julia, and Martha.’ These are the types of clues that you need to get started.”

The next step is to confirm, clarify, or correct the details that you learned from family. She suggests beginning with yourself and working back one generation at a time.

“Also, start with the most recent information about an individual and then work backward. So, start with a person’s death. Whatever detail that you are researching, learn about documents that may tell you the information that you hope to learn.”

You can look for “death

FEATURE information” in records such as death certificates, cemetery records, obituaries, church records, and other sources.

“Something that I always tell genealogists is to keep an open mind when doing your research,” Hoffman says. Remember that your ancestors may have gone by a middle name or nickname instead of their given name. Spelling of surnames may also have changed or been misspelled.”

The Grosvenor Room at the Central Library in Downtown Buffalo (located at 1 Lafayette Square) has professional librarians who are very knowledgeable about genealogy research. The Library also has many genealogy instruction books and offers free classes on how to do genealogy research.

For example, HeritageQuest Helper is a class that Hoffman teaches on the database HeritageQuest Online. “HQ provides access to the US Federal Census 1790-1940, thousands of US city directories, about 28,000 family and local history books, Revolutionary War pension files, Freedman’s Bank Records, an obituary index, and other resources. HQ can be used at every BECPL location and from home with a valid BECPL card.”

Hoffman says Ancestry Library Edition is almost the same as Ancestry.com, a popular commercial database.

“It includes billions of US and foreign historical documents such as census, military, immigration, probate, and vital (birth/marriage/ death) records. ALE is available for use in-library at every BECPL location.”

Genealogy databases provide easy access to records that researchers would otherwise have to travel long distances to view.

“Keep in mind,” Hoffman advises,” that databases do not tell you your family tree. They are tools that help find historical documents through keyword searching. It is up to the researcher to determine his/ her own family lines.

“Some databases include family trees. Individual genealogists of varying experience levels made these trees and they may include errors. Also, the indexing in databases may not be perfect. Handwriting can be difficult to decipher and may cause ‘mis-transcriptions.’ Because of this, it will be necessary to use a variety of search methods when using databases.”

The Grosvenor Room also houses an important collection of microfilmed records. Here you can find Erie County church and cemetery records, some early Buffalo births and Erie County marriages, and numerous Buffalo area newspapers dating back to the early 1800s.

You can also access an extensive collection of published works. Hoffman says, “The collection is rich with family and local histories (mainly East Coast), transcribed records, Erie County high school yearbooks, city directories, and periodicals.”

Digitized Materials Buffalo city directories 18321913, Erie County Poorhouse Records, and local newspapers are some of the materials that are freely accessible online: buffalolib.org/content/digitalcollections The Library has created many detailed guides to its genealogy resources. The topics range from getting started in genealogy to researching a specific ethnic group. Those guides are online on the Library’s website: buffalolib. org/content/grosvenor/guidespublications

She adds, “Two unique resources that you won’t find anywhere but the Grosvenor Room are the Local History File and the Scrapbook Collection.

“The Local History File is the Library’s most comprehensive resource on Buffalo history. It is a card file that indexes select Buffalo newspaper articles as well as other local publications. It covers people, places, and events in Buffalo’s

history. The Scrapbook Collection is a bound set of newspaper clippings organized by subject. They cover the same topics as the Local History File. The most popular topics for genealogy research are local biographies, churches, business, clubs, and homes.” FY Judith A. Rucki is a public relations consultant and freelance writer.

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FEATURE

Find Your Polish Roots STORY AND PHOTO BY CHRISTINE A. SMYCZYNSKI

P

olish Americans are one of the larger ethnic groups in the Buffalo and Western New York region, with approximately 12 percent of the population of Polish descent. The Polish Genealogical Society of New York State was founded here in 1988 to promote the study of Polish genealogy in Western New York, Southern Ontario, and beyond.

Although this group has been around for more than thirty years, I personally learned about it just a few years ago when I decided to get serious about recording my family history.

Since both sets of my grandparents, as well as my husband’s ancestors, were Polish immigrants, I was excited to learn that there was an organization

dedicated to Polish genealogy. The $20 annual membership includes a subscription to its very informative Searchers newsletter, which features articles relating to genealogy and Polish history.

The Polish Genealogical Society of New York State has a number of purposes:

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• to provide a Society for persons interested in Polish genealogy, with a primary focus on families with a New York State connection; • to encourage and promote interest in Polish genealogical research, history, and culture; • to provide educational programs and publications to foster effective genealogical research skills;

• to provide education on Polish history and culture; • to provide assistance to persons researching their family history; • to collect, preserve, and share Polish and related genealogical and historical records and materials; and • to collaborate with other Polish community organizations in

FEATURE projects and activities that promote interest in Polish genealogical research, history, and culture.

The society meets the second Thursday of the month, excluding summer months, at the Museum of Disability History. Some meetings feature a speaker; for example, last year one of the members spoke about her trip to Poland and how she was able to connect with some distant family members. At a recent meeting, Dr. Andrew Wise, a history professor at Daemen College, gave a historical talk about Dr. Francis Fronczak and his public service in the Buffalo in the early 1900s.

Other monthly meetings may feature a research night; if you are at a roadblock in researching your family’s history, other members might be able to assist you. The November meeting usually involves doing a craft; the last couple years, members learned to make Polish Christmas ornaments.

Of course, in December, the group has an annual Christmas party with a dinner featuring Polish dishes like golabki (cabbage rolls) and other ethnic favorites.

If you are unable to join or attend meetings, its newly redesigned website (pgsnys.org) has links to a wealth of information helpful to both novice and experienced genealogists. Beginner researchers should download the twelve-page “Getting Started” guide from the website, which has lots of helpful links and resources.

Another resource available on the website is the Dziennik Death Notice Database, from the Polish language newspaper Dziennik Dla Wszystkich, also known as the Everybody’s Daily, which was published in Buffalo from 1911 to 1957. PGSNYS is in the process of having the over 30,000 death notices in this database digitally preserved and indexed.

Members can obtain copies of obituaries for a nominal charge, or

they can view the microfilm for free at the Buffalo History Museum, the downtown branch of the Buffalo and Erie County public library, the Capen Library on the UB Amherst campus, or the Butler Library at Buffalo State College.

According to Nicole Pohancsek, who recently served as president of the PGSNYS, “The Dziennik can now be searched online from 1911 to 1942. The remainder of the years from 1942 to 1957 will be available online by the end of 2020. This saves people a trip to the library. And, you can search the entire newspaper online, not just the obituaries. Visit nyshistoricnewspapers.org, click on Erie County on the map, then select Dziennik from the list of newspapers.”

This paper had death notices from many Polish immigrants; information in these notices would be helpful to those doing genealogical research, as the obituaries generally have the person’s age, place of birth,

and names of family members.

However, these notices, as well as the rest of the newspaper, are written in Polish. If you can’t read Polish, you can use Google Translate or refer to the Death Notice Translation Guide, which can be found on the Polish Genealogy Society’s website (pgsnys. org/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/ Dziennik_Translation_Guide.pdf) The January meeting of the Polish Genealogy Society of New York State will be on January 9 at 7 p.m. at the Museum of Disability History, 3826 Main Street, Eggertsville. For more information, visit the website pgsnys. org or email information@pgsnys. org. FY Christine A. Smyczynski is a freelance writer and blogger and author of Western New York Explorer’s Guide.

January 2020 | www.foreveryoungwny.com 19

FEATURE

Ancestry through DNA and Research

BY KATHY SCHLAICH

G

enealogy apps are all the rage these days. It seems like everyone is spitting into receptacles and sending them off to have their DNA analyzed to find their roots.

Some do it to find long-lost a personal history to preserve for the relatives. Others are curious about future and to understand himself. a possible relation to an historical My father, Walter Stenton Jr., figure or a famous pop star. Most, came to Niagara Falls from northern I believe, are like my son, Kyle England on a ship with his parents Schlaich, who simply wants to have and three siblings at the age of

HOW DO YOU WISH TO BE REMEMBERED? Walter Stenton Jr. and his wife, Stella Photos courtesy of Kyle Schlaich

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11 in 1924. My mother’s parents were Ukrainian immigrants. My grandfather, Michael Ditkum arrived in 1906. My grandmother, Catherine (Mazkurewitz) Ditkum, arrived in 1912. My husband Greg’s grandmother, Matti Bihlajama, came from Finland in 1896. His greatgrandfather Louis (Ludwig) Schlaich came from Germany in 1882. Both of our mothers spoke their mother’s native languages.

Our families had a basic knowledge of these facts, but Kyle discovered more specific names, dates, and places through painstaking research.

Kyle started his research in 2010 right after graduating college. “I used the internet for my research, which really sped things up. When I took

the Ancestry test about three years ago, I was able to link the tree I had already started with the DNA results.

I also had the DNA results from my parents, fraternal twin brother Evan and my mom’s two sisters which helped expand the tree,” Kyle says.

He developed an interest in ancestry in elementary school studying history and wars. “I interviewed my Grandpa Stenton for a school project in fourth or fifth grade, which furthered my interest,” he says.

Kyle says he was most interested in his family’s history and how certain times in world history relate to his diverse clan. “I’d find a document or a map on Ancestry.com or the internet, and my family’s identity would come alive.”

FEATURE

Kyle Schlaich holds a photo of his ancestors; ancestry.com geneology chart depicting his research results

He was able to trace the origins of his English ancestors back to the 1600s. “The English were great record keepers, most likely because they settled the world and the influence of their royalty,” he says. “The Germans also kept good records, but a lot was lost in World War II. The Finns and Ukrainians were a poorer people, mostly farmers who were just trying to survive and live in their worlds.” As a result, he doesn’t have as much information about this side of the family.

“I had more success researching the history of the country rather than relying on records to find what I needed. Understanding history helps you understand the family connections,” he says.

“Finland was under Swedish rule at one time. I found out that I’m more of a Scandinavian Finn than a Baltic Finn, and, despite my German last name, my DNA is more Scandinavian. I also have more English DNA, while my brother has a little more Ukrainian. “My dad is also more Scandinavian, and my mom is more Eastern European.

“People think they’re a certain nationality and find out something completely different because areas were dissolved and became

something else in modern times.

They might grow up thinking they’re Polish, but today that area is modern-day Ukraine,” he says.

A woman from Niagara Falls contacted Kyle through information posted on Ancestry regarding their great-grandfathers who were both from the same Ukrainian village.

Kyle’s great-grandfather was a furnace operator and hers was an electrician and both died in an industrial accident at the same plant in Niagara Falls in 1944 and 1950 respectively. A family relation wasn’t established. Someone from Sweden also made contact.

Kyle says one frustrating aspect of all this research is that he can’t have a conversation with any of his ancestors, and he’s left with more questions than answers.

“I’d like to know how their political views were formed growing up at a certain place and time. Did they have a favorable opinion of their native countries? Are there certain nuances of speech and mannerisms I’d be able to detect through the generations?”

Kyle plans on continuing his quest and says the experience has made him more culturally aware.

“It helped me understand what it

means to be an American. There’s always something new to find and learn.” FY

Kathy Schlaich is a contributor to Forever Young and has reported for publications across the country.

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FEATURE

Meet a Local Genealogy Research Pioneer

STORY AND PHOTOS

BY RICK FALKOWSKI Cynthia Van Ness helps patrons research records at The Buffalo History Museum

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S

ince 2007, Cynthia Van Ness has been the Director of Library and Archives at The Buffalo History Museum. Prior to that, she was employed at the Buffalo & Erie County Public Library for thirteen years and independently created BuffaloResearch.com, a guide to researching ancestors, buildings, and companies in Buffalo.

Van Ness earned her Master of Library Science degree (MLS) from the University of Buffalo in 1994.

After getting hired at the Buffalo and Erie County Library downtown location, she transitioned into the Grosvenor Room, where she helped establish the special collections, which includes local history and genealogy.

Van Ness’ affinity for researching the past dates back to 1993, when she was still in graduate school. She became involved with a genealogy web page on Buffalo Free-Net called Roots, created by Richard Penn, who later passed it on to Van Ness in 1995.

When researching the history of an old building that she and her husband were considering purchasing for a rehab project, she added information on area properties. As time progressed, she consolidated the genealogy and property information, along with area maps, links to local history publications, and other sources on

her own website BuffaloResearch. com.

According to Van Ness, the nation’s interest in genealogy began when the mini-series Roots aired in 1977. There were not any established training programs for assisting people in genealogy research. The methods progressed and were refined as people began looking into their past. Now, there are many how to books, websites, and classes on genealogy.

When someone comes to The Buffalo History Museum to research their ancestry, the first thing Van Ness does in interview them to ascertain what information they have. She recommends that people create a family tree and compile a family group sheet, which will provide detailed information on the people listed. It is best to start with yourself, complete your family group sheet, and keep

FEATURE expanding from that point. Van Ness emphasizes that she is not a genealogist, she is a genealogical librarian. This means she will not find your relatives, but she will point you to the resources where you can do the research.

Folks must remember that genealogical information is not online unless someone put it there.

You have to go to various sources to obtain the information. A good place to begin is local records section in The Buffalo History Museum Library, Grosvenor Room at the Downtown Library, libraries at area universities, and town historical societies. Review city directories, birth records, death records, marriages, property sales, tax files, church records, census files, legal notices, and military enlistments. Read old newspapers, research Ellis Island files and ship manifests. Look through high school yearbooks and elementary school enrollment files.

BuffaloResearch.com provides a listing of places to obtain information in the “Local Links” section of the website. Research one thing at a time rather than trying to do everything at once.

Van Ness cautions, “if you cast too wide a net, you will get frustrated.”

A lot of work, time, and effort will go into researching your genealogy, but you will enjoy it and the results will be worthwhile.

More research sources Another source of accumulated records is the Western New York Genealogical Society, which was founded by June Partridge Zintz in 1974. The society has information on people from the eight-county Western New York area and is located in the Grosvenor Room at the Downtown Library. Everyone can access their information at the library and if interested, you can become a member of the society. Membership provides

Comfort.

Style.

Beauty.

additional access, their quarterly journal, volunteer opportunities, and meetings and events, which include speakers, workshops, and field trips.

The Church of the LatterDay Saints has created the largest collection of family records in the world and has information on more than three billion deceased people.

This collection includes all people, not just those of the Mormon faith. These records are available free of charge at the familysearch. org website and the Family History Library in Salt Lake City. A network of 4,600 Family History Centers exists in 126 countries, with one of the largest WNY centers being the Family History Center on Maple Road in Williamsville.

Talk to your older relatives before they are gone. They can fill in some of the holes in your research. Ask them about their childhood and general information about when they were growing up.

That may lead you to additional discoveries about your ancestors.

Also, when you find new relatives or relations you have not spoken to for years, contact them and mention that you are researching the family genealogy. They may have done some research that they can share with you and provide additional information.

Begin your personal genealogy research by visiting Cynthia Van Ness at The Buffalo History Museum or one of the other sources that she suggests. You will be rewarded by learning about your roots and, you never know, you may even discover famous ancestors in your family tree. FY Rick Falkowski gives presentations on Buffalo music and history. He is the author of History of Buffalo Music & Entertainment and Profiles Volume 1: Historic & Influential People from Buffalo & WNY – the 1800s.

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GETAWAYS

Coming Down with Keys Disease in Florida STORY AND PHOTOS

BY JENNIFER MERRICK Bahia Honda State Park

K

eys disease is a malady that strikes when one ventures on the Overseas Highway, otherwise known as US Route 1, through the Florida Keys. Symptoms include, but are not limited to, inability to plan, extreme difficulty removing oneself from lounge chairs, and spontaneously humming Jimmy Buffet songs.

I had heard about this affliction but was a blissful 80°F, and our dry, pale Key Largo was our first stop, and never expected I’d be vulnerable. After skin thirstily soaked up the moist, we headed to its most well-known all, I write about my travels, and so I salty air. It felt like we were driving to attraction, John Pennekamp Coral visit destinations armed with research a Caribbean island. One minute we Reef Park. This underwater reserve, materials and a packed itinerary of were on what looked liked an ordinary the first in the US, features 170 must-see attractions. highway, and the next, we were acres of land and 48,000 acres of It turns out, I’m not immune. cruising on a bridge with a front-seat protected ocean. It was here that the We had driven twenty-four hours panoramic view of the most inviting first symptoms of my Keys disease with our family to get to Florida’s turquoise water imaginable. In fact, manifested. southernmost destination and were the Florida Keys archipelago consists I had been very much looking greeted with warm temperatures, a of approximately 1,700 islands forward to snorkelling at the park and tonic for our winter-weary bodies. It connected by forty-two bridges. wanted to see not only the colorful fish but also the eight-foot tall underwater Christ of the Abyss statue. This requires a COME HOME TO boat tour that could be arranged at the 1 & 2 BEDROOM STYLES park. On my list. But, when I got there and saw the palm trees and the white sand, a sense of lethargy came over me, and my muscles relaxed to a puttylike state. Humming Margaritaville, I swapped my flippers for flip-flops and suggested to my family that we just hang out at the beach. Taking our cue from a large iguana, we basked in the 834.3711 sun instead.

410 Hartford Road A similar feeling took hold of me Amherst, NY 14226 during our evening meal at the aptly A quiet senior community nestled in the heart of Amherst. (off Millersport - 1 Block, North of Sheridan)

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named Sundowners restaurant in Key Largo. A family meal that normally would have taken a couple of hours at most stretched into at least four hours, possibly more (hazy memory is another symptom). A huge patio overlooked the water, and we enjoyed the best show in town—a Florida Keys sunset. The brilliant oranges and reds that reflected off the palm trees and sailboats were mesmerizing, and we gazed at the horizon in a near-catatonic state until the sun disappeared completely.

Our next stop was Islamorada. Its name means “purple island,” a moniker given by Spanish explorers when they saw the purple skies at sunset. The island is especially known for sports fishing and catches like marlin, tuna, and swordfish. Personally, what drew me to Islamorada is that the Netflix series Bloodline was filmed there. Its sultry tropical scenes were one of the reasons I first thought about Florida Keys for a holiday, and I was excited to visit some of the filming locations, like the Mooring Village and Spa, which was the shooting location of the Rayburn House, and Robbie’s Marina.

But Keys disease struck again. Our room at the Fisher Inn Resort had a massive patio overlooking sparkling blue water. Its white sand beach was lined with palm trees, perfect for playing games like the Giant Jenga, chess, and bean bag toss. The Atlantic water may have been on the cold side, but the outdoor pool was heated and had a view of the ocean.

Needless to say, we didn’t end up visiting those filming locations or much else in Islamorada.

However, despite the firm hold Keys disease had on us, we did manage to summon the energy to take the ultra-scenic drive to mile marker 0, otherwise known as Key West. In this historic, iconic town, we could have done a lot of things, such as take an Old Town Trolley Tour narrated by a local historian, visit the former residence of Ernest Hemmingway, or check out the Butterfly and Nature Conservatory.

But, once there, we simply strolled down streets lined with candy-colored houses. After the obligatory picture of the Mile Marker 0 landmark, we had

GETAWAYS

lunch at Cuban Coffee Queen, home to a sublime Cuban sandwich.

“What’s next?” asked my family, who rely on my planning for all of our travels.

My hopes of following in the footsteps of Ernest Hemingway disintegrated in the hot sun.

“Let’s just go to a beach.”

We drove to Bahia Honda State

Never miss an issue of

Park, a gorgeous spot to spend a lazy afternoon with long white sand beaches on both the ocean and the Gulf side.

I hope to come back to see and do more than I did on this trip. I wonder if it’s possible to get vaccinated against Keys disease?

If you go: Accommodations: Fisher Inn Resort & Marina, Islamorada. This boutique hotel, rebuilt after Hurricane Irma, features twenty-two stylishly decorated rooms with cool touches, like a robin’s-egg blue microwave and matching metal chairs. But the beach and the views from the large patio are what won me over.

Ocean Pointe Suites, Key Largo.

All of the 170 units at the resort are suites and can accommodate larger families and multi-generational trips. Ours had two bedrooms, two bathrooms, a living room, laundry, and a full kitchen. The resort itself was expansive and secluded with

sixty acres of oceanfront property.

A definite highlight was its newly renovated Junior Olympic-size pool that included a twelve-person Jacuzzi hot tub.

Hawks Cay Resort, Duck Key. A destination itself, this resort reopened in August 2018 after a $50 million renovation. This sixty-acre property has 177 guestrooms and 250 two- and three-bedroom villas, six restaurants, a saltwater lagoon, five swimming pools, kid and teen clubs, and a spa.

Camping. Securing spots in the Florida Keys can be a challenge, especially in peak season. Some spots to try include Curry Hammock State Park, Key Largo Kampground & Marina, and John Pennekamp Coral Reef State Park.

For more information about The Florida Keys, visit fla-keys.com FY Jennifer Merrick is a freelance writer, photographer, and avid traveler based in Toronto.

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Millennium Hotel | 2040 Walden Ave., Buffalo, NY 14225 Doors open 6pm | Showtime 7:30pm Tickets available at Doris Records, Revolver Records and Cool Beat Records

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BEING WELL

What Are YOU Eating?

BY CATHERINE STACK

M

any consumers fall for words like “all natural,” or “heart healthy” and are drawn to labels with pretty pictures of fruits and vegetables when shopping for groceries. These very misleading marketing ploys are partially responsible for the rising number of people diagnosed with heart disease, diabetes, and those suffering from obesity, even though they are eating foods that claim to benefit health. Here are some examples of poor choices when it comes to so called “healthy” foods: High fiber bars: These bars are marketed for a diet high in fiber to help you lose weight and feel full.

Check out the oat and chocolate “naturally flavored” bars, which have more chocolate than oats and have at least six types of sugar in the ingredient list. If you’d like to experience abdominal bloating and gas from the sugar alcohols and fast-track yourself to an adult onset diabetes diagnosis, eat these!

Fruit drinks: When shopping for children, please do not fall for pictures of fruits or added vitamins on the labels. It infuriates me that many of these products are allowed to be sold to growing children and we wonder why we see so many suffer from ADD/ADHD. An example of nutrition gone wrong for toddler age children are those billed as “graduates for preschoolers juice treats.” Absolutely NO healthy fat or protein, just 17 grams of sugar, and corn syrup. There is more sugar than 26

juice. These children are not likely to be able to focus or concentrate due to the severe rise and fall of blood sugar.

Nutri-grain and whole wheat waffles: These waffles actually contain more white flour than whole wheat (not that whole wheat is much better).

Gluten-free trap: With so many individuals sensitive to gluten these days, the gluten-free industry is booming. Buyers need to beware, as many gluten free products are much higher in sugar that the items they replace. I have had many individuals complain of weight gain as they transition to a gluten-free lifestyle.

This tells me that they are eating a processed gluten-free diet, rather than vegetables, meat, poultry, nuts, and fresh fruits.

Low fat. For anyone still convinced that eating less fat will protect their hearts, some fat free dressings have 7 grams of sugar in the form of high fructose corn syrup. High sugar diets pave the way for diabetes first, with

www.foreveryoungwny.com | January 2020

heart disease surely to follow. For those already suffering from diabetes, the old recommendations were to eat sugar free. So, how about a sugar free devil’s food cake mix? You may find yourself running for the bathroom from the laxative effect of maltitol (sugar alcohol), suffering the negative effects from trans fats (partially hydrogenated soybean oil), and let’s not forget brain or neurologic damage from sucralose or acesulfame potassium.

Microwave meals: Now for those who are too busy and must resort to buying frozen meals: consider that an 8.5 ounce meal often contains more than fifty ingredients. I checked out the ingredient list of a frozen cuisine of lean chicken with basil cream sauce, which contained trans fats (partially hydrogenated or hydrogenated anything), chicken parts (you don’t want to know), MSG or monosodium glutamate (disguised as whey protein concentrate), and many other chemicals and sugars.

MSG: MSG affects many individuals with symptoms such as migraine headaches, upset stomach, fuzzy thinking, diarrhea, heart irregularities, asthma and/or mood swings. It is not easily recognized as it is hidden under many names. The following ingredients should always be treated as MSG. Anything with the words “glutamate,” yeast extract, anything “hydrolyzed,” autolyzed yeast, gelatin, textured protein, soy protein isolate, soy protein concentrate, whey protein isolate, vetsin, and ajinomoto. Bouillon and broth often contain MSG and the same goes for soy sauce.

“Organic”: Even foods labeled as organic can contain high amounts of sugar and other ingredients that are not health promoting. So many well-intentioned people are falling for marketing tricks that do not benefit their health.

Healthy eating made easy Eat foods as they come from nature in their purest forms. There is such an amazing selection of fresh food available to you.

Frozen, wild caught fish with asparagus and a salad make a great meal that takes less than twenty minutes to put together. You do not have to be a chef to cook healthy meals that taste amazing.

Avoid long ingredient lists.

Add great flavor to your food by using fresh herbs as not only do they add flavor, but most have health benefits as well.

A little education can go a long way when it comes to what we put in our mouths and our overall health. FY Catherine (Cathi) Stack is owner, facilitator and Doctor of Naturopathy at Journey II Health, LLC in Niagara Falls. She specializes in colon health and bio-identical hormone replacement and is also a practicing staff midwife at Millard Fillmore Suburban Hospital.

Her books, Free Yourself from a CONSTIPATED Life and PUSH, Labor & Delivery from the Inside Out are available on amazon.com Visit cathistack.com for more info.

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Here’s how: wake up to Roger Christian and Danny Neaverth weekday mornings, as they will announce the WECK SONG OF THE DAY at 8:20 a.m. They’ll tell you when to listen that day for that song between 9 a.m. and 6 p.m.

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YOUR PAGE Forever Young readers: we want to hear from you! Do you know someone who deserves to be recognized? Tell us more.

Do you have a story you’d like to share? Drop us a line.

We want to devote space in Forever Young to what matters most: you. Send your story ideas to editor Wendy Guild Swearingen at wswearingen@ foreveryoung.com or 1738 Elmwood Ave., Suite 103, Buffalo, NY 14207.

Happy New Year,

WECK owner and president 28

FOR RENT

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JANUARY SOLUTION

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January 3 Explore Buffalo: Buffalo’s Two Cathedrals

January 6 Peter Asher “Musical Memoir of the ‘60s & Beyond”

Take an in-depth look at St. Paul’s Episcopal Cathedral and St. Joseph’s Roman Catholic Cathedral.

One half of the British pop duo Peter & Gordon and manager and producer to James Taylor, Asher was a giant of the 1960s music industry. This show features intimate tales from his career, as well as a few favorite tunes.

10 a.m., Mon Ami Cafe (298 Main Street; Explorebuffalo.org, 245-3032)

January 10 M&T Second Fridays: Stay Gold: A Celebration of WNY Art Experience the best of Burchfield Penney, including exhibition openings, happy hours, programs, concerts, screenings, or other special events, visitors. This month’s highlights include live music and programming by more than twenty special guest artists and art groups.

4–11 p.m. at Burchfield Penney Art Center (1300 Elmwood Avenue; Burchfieldpenney.org, 878-6011)

7 p.m. at Sportsmen’s Tavern (326 Amherst Street; sportsmensbuffalo.com, 874-7734)

January 11 Science Mike Trinity Episcopal Church’s Fresh Voices series features leading speakers who bring new and provocative perspectives. Mike McHargue is author of Finding God in the Waves.

7:30 p.m. at Trinity Episcopal (371 Delaware Avenue; Trinitybuffalo.org, 852-8314)

January 25 Larkinville Ice Festival This family-themed event includes kids’ games, alpacas, local vendors, food trucks, and more on the heated, covered boardwalk.

11 a.m.–3 p.m., Larkin Square (745 Seneca Street; larkinsquare.com, 362-2665)

January 2020 | www.foreveryoungwny.com 29