ACROSS the Board By Patrick Adams
Lessons from highs and lows
T
he past many weeks have been an emotionally exhausting roller coaster. It’s one of those times where you suffer a couple of hits, take a deep breath, feel thankful that the fight is over, and then get gut punched. After taking numerous hits, I usually begin considering why I’m getting hit, what I could have done to prevent them, and what I’m supposed to learn from it all. What seems like months and months ago (last August), I shared news of our house “demolition” as a result of a $3 leaking supply line. Well, construction is underway and with a family, a business, and travel, combined with delays, cost over-runs and trying to make good decisions that we’ll have to live with, it is taking my family to the breaking point. I am cursed with being a “problem solver” and I’ve learned that there are some problems that I simply can’t solve and taking some punches are unavoidable. However, as they say, the show must go on. As I prepared for a trip I was excited about (part business, but mostly a great opportunity to visit with an industry leader, who’s both a good man and someone I call a friend), I received news that another friend lost his daughter to a long fight with cancer. I unfortunately have seen many fights for life, but none that have been a gut punch like this. She was just 14 and although she passed far too young, she is the one story that I will say “won” her fight. After countless surgeries, treatments, highs and lows, she never gave up and never stopped smiling. This also gave her family the blessing of being able to fight along with her in the most inspiring and graceful way that I know I would never be capable of. Until now, my many fights have only been about winning. She has taught me that there is far more importance in how you fight than whether or not you “win.” This is how legacies are defined and hers will stay with me forever. In the midst of this, I watched (from farther away than my heart would prefer) what is happening in eastern Europe. I watched again as yet another terrorist played out his wishes at the expense of innocent people and their families. This is personal for me and should be for everyone, yet the world responds as if it’s some reality show that they can easily shut off before going to bed in the comfort of their homes. I ask myself how these same people would feel if it was their husband fighting thousands to drop off their family at a foreign border, with only a handful of their life’s possessions, and then turn around to fight for their home and life? It is easy to think that we are “past this” and that things like this only happen with savages in third world countries, but it doesn’t. While these actions are hard for me to watch unfold, the silence by the rest of the world allowing it to
happen is what is most unbelievable and should serve as an eye opener for everyone. But as I returned from one of the first industry events I have attended since the pandemic, I am again conflicted in my emotions. This event was different for me for some reason. For years these industry leaders have been kind to me and welcomed me as I took the helm of these publications. But this time, more than usual, I shared my highs and lows with them as if they were the friends they had promised for years to be. I was unusually vulnerable with things I was struggling with within my business and shared the things I was scared about as a parent of young kids these days. These are things I have never done with anyone other than those whom I have been through countless battles with. I should not have been surprised that baring my soul to these fine people was rewarded a hundredfold. People who have already made their summit in life took time to listen, and give kind, thoughtful advice. Men and women who I’ve known, but have not even shared a meal with, extended offers to visit them, stay in their homes, and have an “escape” from the things that may be stretching my family. It was a lesson to me that I will never forget that sometimes, simply trusting people is rewarded. More than anything, I look at these “lows” and it simply makes me grateful. Thankful my family is healthy and that we are together. Grateful to those who put themselves in harm’s way so we can live our peaceful, safe lives. Humbled that the miracle that brought me to this industry has had the additional gifts of making true friends who help to bring out my better side. While our lives may not be perfect, remember that there are countless millions who pray every night for the life of “problems” that we may have. More than ever, I am humbled and grateful for this industry and its people whom we have the privilege of serving.
Patrick S. Adams Publisher/President padams@526mediagroup.com
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n Building Products Digest n July 2022
Building-Products.com
