THRIVE: The Pathway to Flexible Thinking

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Table of contents Flexible Thinking 3

What is flexible thinking?

Automatic negative thoughts (ANTs) 4 5 6 7

What are ANTs? Examples of ANTs Squash the ANTs Practice flexible thinking

Happiness 9 10

What is happiness? Cultivate happiness

Authentic self 11 12

Defining your authentic self Discover your authentic self

Gratitude 13

Ways to cultivate gratitude

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What is flexible thinking? Flexible thinking allows you to reframe how you think and feel about adverse situations. This doesn’t mean that negativity is absent from your life or that you are always happy. Rather, flexible thinking mitigates the affects that adverse experiences have on your life. It allows you to reframe negative situations to be something you grow from instead of something that negatively affects you.

Flexible thinking is circular Our thoughts determine what we believe. In turn, our beliefs impact how we feel, which influences our actions. This affects our thoughts, and the cycle repeats.

Thoughts

Beliefs

Actions

Feelings

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Automatic Negative Thoughts (ANTs)

What are ANTs? To break the cycle of rigid or concrete thinking, we must start by exploring our unhelpful thoughts. These unhelpful thoughts are called, “Automatic Negative Thoughts” or “ANTs”. ANTs are cynical, gloomy, and complaining thoughts that reoccur frequently.

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Automatic Negative Thoughts (ANTs) Cynical, gloomy and complaining thoughts that reoccur frequently.

Always/never thinking:

Guilt beating:

Focusing on the negative:

Labeling:

Fortune telling:

Personalizing:

Thinking in words like always, never, no one, everyone, every time, everything. “No one will ever call me,” or “I’ll never get a raise.” Only seeing the bad in a situation. For example, if you receive 100 evaluation forms and two out of 100 are negative, you are only able to focus on the two negative responses rather than the 98 positive responses.

Thinking in words like should, must, ought or have to. “I ought to spend more time at home,” or “I should have figured this out by now.” Attaching a negative label to yourself or to someone else, such as “I’m stupid,” or “He’s a jerk.” This disables you from thinking more clearly about the situation or the person.

Predicting the worst possible outcome, such as assuming your partner won’t be interested in what you have to say in a future discussion.

Taking a non-eventful event and putting personal meaning to it. For example, thinking your boss is mad at you because they did not say good morning.

Mind reading:

Blaming:

Believing you know what others are thinking even though they haven’t told you. “She’s mad at me,” or “They were talking about me.”

Blaming something or someone else for your own problems, making you the passive victim. “How was I supposed to know,” or “It’s your fault that…”

Thinking with your feelings:

Believing negative thoughts without ever questioning them. “I feel like a failure,” or “I feel like nobody will ever trust me.”

Amen, D. Change your Brain, Change your Body. New York, NY. Harmony Books.

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Squash the ANTs

Practice flexible thinking by squashing your ANTs. The more we actively engage our minds to think in this way the more natural it will become. This skill is like building a muscle – the more you practice, the stronger you’ll get and the better you’ll feel. 1. Write down the thought. 2. Identify the species. 3. Talk back to the ANT by reframing your thought. FOR EXAMPLE:

ANT: “I’m stupid.” Species: Labeling Reframe: “I might not get things right all of the time, but I get things right most of the time.”

Other helpful tips: • Surround yourself with supportive people. • Build people skills by investing in your relationships and noticing the good in people. • Seek professional assistance when needed. Think flexibly about what it means to ask for help. Asking for support is a sign of strength. Amen, D. Change your Brain, Change your Body. New York, NY. Harmony Books.

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Practice flexible thinking

Savor the moment

Pause to appreciate your current environment and situation.

Laughter

Practice non-judgmental awareness

Be present in the moment while letting go of judgment and staying free from expectations. Be aware of what is happening around you and how you are experiencing it, while not trying to change it.

Laughter helps you increase positivity. When you laugh, endorphins are released from the brain via opioid receptors to promote euphoria. The more opioid receptors in your brain, the more powerful the effect. 1

Connect with others

Interact with people who make you happy and distance yourself from people in your life who bring more negativity than positivity.

Proactively resolve conflict

As soon as conflict arises, mindfully engage with the situation to positively and peacefully resolve the conflict.

Develop effective self-care

Laughing also helps release serotonin, which is the same chemical affected by most types of anti-depressants. The burst of brain activity triggered from laughing is potent for short periods of time.2

Take care of yourself mentally, physically and emotionally, and remember to set boundaries.

Mindfully use your resources

Be conscientious of how you spend your money, time and energy.

Laughter has also been found to have an anti-inflammatory effect, protecting heart muscles and blood vessels from the damaging effects of cardiovascular disease. 3

Curtail comparisons

Don’t lose yourself in comparing your life to someone else's.

Live an authentic and meaningful life

Be true to yourself and your values.

1 - www.jneurosci.org/content/early/2017/05/23/JNEUROSCI.0688-16.2017 2 - https://synapse.koreamed.org/DOIx.php?id=10.4040/jkan.2015.45.2.221&vmode=PUBREADER 3 - http://www.umm.edu/news-and-events/news-releases/2000/laughter-is-good-for-your-heart-according-to-a-new-ummc-study

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How does flexible thinking relate to happiness? 8


a p h p s i i n t e a ss h ? W Happiness isn’t a “thing,” and it can be very difficult to define. It’s not one emotion or an end state, but a state of being and a life-long pursuit.

Happiness is subjective to the individual. We are each in control of our own happiness; no one can choose happiness for us. Building our own support system and employing healthy coping skills allows us to adjust to a variety of external factors that could impact our happiness. It’s important to remember that happiness is not the absence of pain or displeasure. 9


Cultivate happiness Foster relationships by spending time face-to-face with people you enjoy. Be present by taking technology-free time to appreciate your current environment. Create healthy habits that benefit you and let go of habits that do not. Combat feelings of failure by reframing them as set-backs and learning opportunities. Create positive reinforcements by consciously recognizing your personal strengths and employing healthy rewards. Nurture authenticity by aligning your actions with your values.

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Authentic self Authenticity occurs when what you do aligns with your values and who you are. It may be difficult to always act authentically. Here are some ways to help you discover your authentic self.

Define your values

Spend time reflecting on what is most important to you, such as family, career, community or well-being.

Align your actions with your values

Bypass internal conflict, guilt, shame and disengagement that occurs when values and actions do not align.

Be open

Avoid being trapped by judgment and self-imposed limits.

Practice self-awareness

Be aware of your reactions in situations, and take a moment to breathe, assess and respond.

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Discover your authentic self

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Write down your most important values in order of importance. Keep in mind that these may change over time.

1, Family 2. Career

3. Fitness

4. Faith 5. Leisure

Next, draw a pie chart and list out how much each item takes up of that pie.

Are your actions aligned with your values? In the chart shown, family is the number one value, yet only gets 15% of the effort. Find ways to make adjustments so that your effort and values are in alignment. Set boundaries, say no, or get creative with your schedule. For example, find ways to include your family in your fitness activities.

Aligning actions to values increases happiness.

When these are misaligned it leads to lower happiness.

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Gratitude

When practiced regularly, gratitude can promote feelings of positivity. There is evidence that thoughtful gratitude increases happiness and reduces depressive symptoms, and those who practice gratitude are generally more optimistic and feel better about their lives as a whole.4

Ways to cultivate gratitude Write a thank-you note to a person you enjoy and appreciate.

Practice gratitude meditation, focusing on the present moment without judgment.

Take time to reflect on what you are grateful for.

Send silent thanks by thinking about someone who has done something nice for you and mentally send them gratitude.

Keep a gratitude journal.

4 - https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/pdfs/GratitudePDFs/6Emmons-BlessingsBurdens.pdf

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Pathways to flexible thinking how to practice flexible thinking and cultivate happiness: • Listen to the Healthe at Cerner podcast episode on Automatic Negative Thoughts. • Listen to the Healthe at Cerner podcast episode on Positivity. • Visit Total Brain to check out positivity games, including Expressions of Gratitude. • Take time to discover your authentic self. • Cultivate gratitude by keeping a gratitude journal. • Write a thank you note.

How are you practicing flexible thinking? SHARE YOUR FLEXIBLE THINKING USING

#HOWITHRIVE @healtheatcerner

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