The ConTextos Authors Circle was developed in collaboration with young people at-risk of, victims of, or perpetrators of violence in El Salvador. In 2017 this innovative program expanded into Chicago to create tangible, high quality opportunities that nourish the minds,,expand the voices and share the personal truths of individuals who have long been underserved and underestimated. Through the process of drafting, revising and publishing memoirs, participants develop self-reflection, critical thinking, camaraderie and positive selfprojection to author new life narratives. Since January 2017 ConTextos has partnered with Cook County Sheriff's Office to implement Authors Circle in Cook County Department of Corrections as part of a vision for reform that recognizes the value of mental health, rehabilitation and reflection. These powerful memoirs complicate the narratives of violence and peace building, and help author a hopeful future for human beings behind walls, their families and our collective communities. While each author’s text is solely the work of the Author, the image used to create this book’s illustrations have been sourced by various print publications. Authors curate these images and then, using only their hands, manipulate the images through tearing, folding, layering and careful positioning. By applying these collage techniques, Authors transform their written memoirs into illustrated books. This project is being supported, in whole or in part, by federal award number ALN 21.027 awarded to Cook County by the U.S. Department of the Treasury.
Luminati Dreams Part 1 Isaiah Jones
“Out of the night that covers me Black as the pit from pole to pole, I thank my God that be for my unconquerable soul. In the firm clutch of circumstance I have not whined or cried aloud; Under the bludgeonings of change My head is bloody but unbowed. It matters not how straight the gate, How charged with punishment the scroll I am the master of my fate I am the captain of my soul.”
Lately I been Luminati dreaming. Seeing things that only the light can reveal. Meeting people that introduced themselves in drea ms. Walking places that I trekked first in visions.
I find that it’s a blessing I’m in jail right now. I know I’ll come out stronger. I count the fact that I’m worthy of being persecuted by the Devi l as a blessing. Like Job, I feel that this is a great test of my faith. Faith is executed best when put in situations where it’s difficult to sustain it.
Do you have faith?
Born February 21st, 2001 at 11:31pm, I was named Isaiah Elijah after the prophets. Growing up I hated my name. My Pops had the name Eric, my brother’s was Erik. I wanted mines to be Erick. My Pops wasn’t in my life consistently, BUT that didn’t stop me from admiring him. Whenever I did get time with him, he’d tell me to be better than him. He would tell me stories about his life that painted a better picture of who he was as a person. That helped me understand him better. I get the fire side of my personality from my Pops. He is a humble man but don’t tolerate disrespect. I love you Pops.
The water side of my personality comes from my Grandfather. He was always cool, calm and collected. He had a silent confidence and never felt the need to boast. His nature was to lead by setting an example. Less talk, more action. I wanted to be an architect because of him. He could take anything apart and put it together again. My Grandfather was a deacon and a father to the fatherless. Losing him devastated me. I shed the most tears when he went to heaven. I’ve had dreams of him coming back to life and hope that is manifested in my lifetime.
Just in case you haven’t realized it yet, I’ll say it plain. Baby I’m a dreamer. I feel that dreams are a way for God to communicate his will to us. A lot of my inspirations come from dreams. I want to manifest whatever God’s will is.
I wasn’t always a spiritual individual. At one point I didn't believe in anything I couldn’t see. The theory of evolution was a reality I acknowledged and accepted. Deep down I knew that wasn’t the truth though.
Growing up in a Christian family and going to church every Sunday didn’t persuade me to believe in God. I was rebellious. I didn’t swallow anything just because someone told me to, no matter what authority that person had. I needed to find the recipe for truth myself. I spent extensive amounts of time studying different religions. Eventually I met a special girl that inspired me to become more spiritual.
We met while we were in high school. I didn’t believe in God and neither did she but one day she got found. She would text and call me to tell me about the Bible. I didn’t want to hear nothing she was talking about. Little did I know, she planted a seed that would begin to grow. I love you Chelsea.
I dropped out of school due to depression. I felt like school was hurting more than helping. I was lost. Once my Mama found out I was ditching she sent me to live with my Pops. I stayed with my Pops for a couple of months until it was time for me to go off to Job Corps. He wasn’t gon allow me to sit around doing nothing. Before I departed to go off to Job Corps, my Pops gave me words that have always stuck with me. He said, “be a leader not a follower. You yo own man, don’t let nobody lead you astray.” Ima heed those words until I die.
I got to Job Corps and started to believe in a higher power that I called “The Universe.” One day me and my brothers went downtown on a weekend pass. That day was like a movie. I ended up getting cross-faded (drunk and high) and found myself trying to cross a street. Somebody from my circle yelled “Run!” so I ran, not being in my right mind. Then WHAM! smacked right into a garbage truck. The truck just kept driving like nothing happened. I kept moving like nothing happened. While the people I called my brothers laughed.
That night left a big s car running God that n across my ight, I than arm and m k e d th Today there y heart. I d e universe . The creati idn’t thank ’s a heart s o h n a ra p ed birthma ther than th Th a n k G o d rk over the ! After tha e creator t I got the scar that is inspired an n ickname W now unnoti OG I met in olverine. T ceable. jail to nick h great at Jo a t s a m n e a c m h b Corps. e me X - M a aracter n, or X for At the top s h o rt . I was doin of my clas s in security g the military , p ro gressing in . One mista high schoo ke disrupte and after l, and prep d everythin hitting tha aring for g. Untame t truck, tru d fire. I had st issues, to anger issu o. es
en etwe b n y’ll nsio r the en te e k h o t p o br uns he s my s an l to t a a e e u w f n eo nly here f som ss was o A ch. T o u k n m An R hi s ne . t a d d I a s e r e s t e c c t ot broth cause on r not. Tha but respe when I g y m e h e t , o uch me nigh to th g wit ned me b m n e n e i i v n o g o d o l o n hea ack, dde sses like t they d ha b o a a t e t r ’ s e p p e t n x h a p m d d t ne ld en he I di kind I sto face e, ho week . So I was er. W omeone y that m h r t m d o p o f n r n sto up im ro ns k yb us a Than be m urst out o ere lined t, to cut h the RA to d the doo . s d y e a r ck e w on it b alw nly fo he slamm . I bla he fr ). We and r t o r o o s t n s i o e a i d v lk er e at ad flam to wa . After th of th broth ntial e y w e m o d m i d r s in in fo rom (Re to go the w ion f ened s e h p s i o g m u r m oo ind hro per he d r beh e at me t T e . h e t c ar bro offi to gl ll the d a n c u aro and rned elf. u t n t mys the h g u I ca God
I sto p p e d
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I slammed the door open and grabbed him by the shirt, forcing him up against the wall. It all happened so fast. It was as if I went ultra instinct. It just happened. The next day I got kicked out. Gam e over, back to level one. After all my hard work, I had nothing to show for it. All I had was the wisdom from the experience at Job Corps. I don’t know about you, but I hate letting my Mama down. She cried because of the fact that I cou ldn't walk across the stage for my high school graduation and I cried when I realized I let her down again by getting kicked out. I was sorry then and I’m sorry now. I love you Ma.
Some t h in g ha d t d ia l o o cha g ue . ng e . S e lf - a th e th I ha d w a re in g s I to n e ss d id e fr o m h e lp e d c h a n ge . I v ery d f a m il sta r te me u a y . Th y a nd you t d by n d er s is h e l s o c ie ha t I b t a p n e t d y d h . I u se the m ecoming a a te d me u d um b d m o nl e a r wa re t iv a t i y to h a , stu p n a lo of my o ns a te m y id , u g s e l f b e c a u was i t n o in n e r s d l se I a elf, b y , e tc f unh n dar e m o t io n u t d id ealth c c ep . bac kn e ss In o r d s in v o te d w y ha b k th e n ’t u n . My s e r to lv e d i n . I’ d it s t h ha t e d e r st e lf e s ha v e n a b v a t h in g t e e t n e I r l d i y a e e g o bsorb v e it . m wa w hy . ood t n e sa s. I sp N s M e h id a b e nt a d in g s a fragil a yb e ha d n out m ow I can t lo t o f e . So no t o n d ke o c lu e e l t n . t l e im e r h a t’s e w ha You t p th e th e su e f le c o ne o e l l me m, I b t I wa rf a c e t in g o f e n te d , I’ m t l h i b e e u v n t in t e e we first t to d o my p a r h m n in g s I w it h ally I ust fe s t m is my lif worke el w o ta k e s e. r d t a nd s on. moke hy of thos e goo d a lo d t of w eed . I
I didn’t know what success was. Everyone has a different picture of success. I didn’t know what mines was. I had no clue what I wanted my success to look like. Wh ich meant I had no idea what I wanted. I spent a lot of time tryi ng to figure that out. I spent a tita nic amount of time studying spirituality. During this time I fell in love with cadence aka music .
e to realize how powerful music is and how Whenever I got low. She kept me high. I’ve com rhythm and consist of frequencies and constant. It is in everything. All things move to a generate. Every thought we think vibrations. Our auras consist of the vibrations we cts our bodies. We are all spiritual generates a certain vibration. Every vibration affe the things that we cannot see, but know is before we are physical. The spiritual consists of know we have them. We don’t see God there through faith. We don’t see souls, yet we d the spiritual without a hint of faith. and yet we know he's there. You won’t understan s that the strongest men in the world Faith as small as a mustard seed can unlock door their lives seeking, and most importantly couldn’t, can bestow wisdom that men dedicate them destroyed. can save your soul from those who seek to have
Back to the story. Cadence became my best friend. She was always there when I needed her. And she was there before I got kicked out of Job Corps. In high school I wouldn’t be able to focus in class unless I had my headphones in. Once it became a problem I would stop going to that class. I needed music. Couldn’t nobody separate us.
After quitting two jobs, one at Walmart pushing carts and the other working the stockroom at Ross, I was desperate when I got my last job at DHL. I worked hard for that job and at it. Yet, I couldn’t keep it due to my love for music. I was bringing my speaker in, blasting music while I worked. If I didn’t bring the speakers, I had my headphones in. I thought that working hard would distract my supervisors from my blatant disruptions of the workplace.
I treated work like a workout. Although I didn’t like working at DHL, I worked hard. I rode my bike seven miles there and back everyday. Once I put on my music on I locked in. At some point I became a problem for my supervisor. I got fired for having a hood on, but truly I think he fired me because I outshined him, which was not my intention. I would wear all black and didn't talk to nobody but this Latina girl named Tamata and an older Latina woman. Some of my peers began to think I was the boss. One time a lady that had just gotten hired asked me if she could use the bathroom. That shocked me.
I couldn’t stop taking loss after loss. It felt like whenever I’d advance five steps, fate would Spartan kick me back ten. I had control over my emotions, but that wasn’t enough. I needed to learn how to get control over my life. I found that I lacked discipline. For a long period of time after getting kicked out of Job Corps I was a big ass game head that smoked weed and blasted music all day. I’ve seen and heard of people wasting their time doing that their whole life. I couldn't allow that to be me too. I needed a purpose, I searched for a dream.
me n so . I o s wa ed eed and She n . a e else g sh .V., , Ch e kin of the T iling? e h f i t l be fa my rid ves d to irl in got o e l , g t l e n o a wh I wa my gam eci , but a sp bitious. d d y l e b o e c Is ed am her. ry to suc ons. tivat nt and g o n i m ss a d e s s to le I wa depend dy, inclu s neces n i n s e sse tm , in re i ybo mos rong ns. Ever ia. Failu all my lo t S . Like it io med up. Turn n sh ract cial o quee all dist e s gam e on off y t m m i u t c y ep ed m ad to st limit h I me. Not
Yet I kept taking los ses. I mad I love em e the dec like a bro ision to lin ther. Still. Whole tim k up with W e were kic a snake. W e he envie king it an d me and e met in h in a secon d tr y in d igh schoo id g to make s what snak d. I ended l. o e m s do best, up getting e money to had no on shed his s arrested fo g e e to blam th e r. kin. Broth r a gun ch e but mys rather wa ers to ene arge due elf. I take lk alone th mies to w h h o im betray I hang aro an with th ing me. B und very s e wrong c ut I eriously n rowd. ow and w ould
Catching a gun charge weighed heavy on my heart. This was my first run-in with the law. So every possible outcome was exaggerated in my mind. I was scared. Along with my fears came my shame. Every sin from my past burdened me all at once. I had just lost my job, got betrayed by someone I loved and was facing jail time. It was too much for me to handle. I didn’t feel worthy of being on earth. I thought that being a failure was my destiny. No matter how hard I tried. No matter how genuine my intentions were. It was written for me to fail.
I to o k B e l l in t h e w oo s d / H ta r s. Th th e y il l s id ew s h e, n t h e y h in e d ig h t o l e s k y b r ig se e s was h te ar m th a t fill w o u e d to b r th a n e u su a l l y s e d w it h th e tr a c e sp ld t a ta r l r e st ks g ea k th e m e ss. .Id in g a z in k e m y l co n . Th I o t i n g f v in c n o ed m at the e. I swe me, b ’t know oticed at was my a th r e u ar I ro sta r e e st n u su a l felt ck aga what it s, b m a d o m I g o to g e t a rs ut i in s t it c w as u t e th in a becau th e abo e d e o n m y p . I r o s t n e v e r o m in g l ik e s l ig n t rack ut t e fr kn e a nd God cam m e n e in c is io h s o e e . m s h e t b e li s n th I wa p ut e .Ip a nd th e ev at I h it e d e s t a r s a n d lann ard th gr o w o u p ra y e e b s t r a e d it a is h a n d fo e und u dw ld ig h t n o a n d d o n w h o r n a s r th e t t a n d d s t il l d n m y s b e c o m it h t e r a a wa l I la i it in g ar h o ea na rr k d o n in G o d s. I r e p e d h o m . Th e s o w . I t r u s t o u ld e r w he a nd en t e tars the h im e. W fea n it s d c r h a i o n f e id , “ gm m or a nIg co m Ev e a n. ll of o t in es t pletely r W y my o tr si n s ia l s w it h m t h in g is h en I g y a nd a o g trib life. No oing to t up I f nd ul a t e lt be io n s m a n o f Go alright . .” I d ’s pat h is
f focus t a lot o u p I d e e time ing sav idn't hav After be d . I d . o e t G a e no h ve n’t chas west is hat I ha ld t lo u e o w h c o t I n , . shit s gain I had n is love solo dolo g I lost a the time vibratio e in t e m h s k t o e a y s t r h n e o ig v as, o t e n. The h ecided ot back I count dream w io d g t y I I a . r m l. e t a ib m v a n h g my and ibratio ulfilled zed w on raisin e I reali as low v king out of that f c r w n o e t o n w a o t , h a t N g h . hing oney knew t d fastin for anyt ase no m ream. I y, starte h d a c d a ’t y r g n e in ld v s ou on cha itating e girls. I c an med to focus g s e s b le I my b . e . being jo . I raised d foods uld com o e o o s t s w e n e c io ls o t ge music ting pr onnec everythin listen to from ea y, soul c t d d o I’ ie b r d , e y v d in Lil ne dm ut my m er. Like nt. Whe b change a w t , r lo e o n a p li r u n/a ame im he y discip y vibratio el that t d to bec m ot only m e e l f n n I e e g e t l. f s in a li p e ld velo .” It’s r s I cou music I I was de my aura hat the k action t r d s. a h e d g ig r n h e a h n so ual selve e ch d ot it n n ir o a p d s g r ’s n t vibratio li u t kil gs tha with o ke abou use f touch ome thin o s t u id o d ty beca that spo u e e a ’r n e e o b d w t d u , “Yo is tha utwar id, TJay say ty today uty for o Jesus sa a ie . e s c s b o e s r n e h k n r wit ed he da ifice in problem t only fe tuck in t We sacr s o . n d h n o s t a le r t f e he ligh memb ith the ious to t essed w at we re v s h li t b b t o n O is a . t s r e impo effect Everyon .” So it’s nt of its u a r o y o n in ig h we are od is wit om of G d g in K lso. “The e spirit a h t t u b , the flesh
A couple of weeks after being saved, I had a dream. I was walking down the middle of the street past my elementary school. What really stood out about the dream was the fact that I had on a Glory Boy chain. For those that don’t know, in order to get a Glory Boy chain you have to be signed to GBE (Glory Boyz Entertainment). GBE is a record label. Getting signed would imply making music, which I had never thought of until I had this dream. This was what I had been waiting for. Making music fit me perfectly considering my love for music. I think my Auntie Sharon influenced my love for music most. I’ll give her credit for my impeccable taste in music, too. When I was younger she was like my Guardian angel. I was scared to sleep by myself, so I’d sleep with her whenever I was at my grandparent’s house. Which was most nights. We would listen to and watch Michael Jackson and Prince DVD’s together. She loved them. Rest in Peace to my Auntie.
“In the midst of chaos, there is also opportunity.” -SUN YZU
Now I got God and a dream. A complete one eighty from damn near committing suicide some weeks before. God is good. Equipped with a purpose, I started writing right away. I would write/type lyrics using the notes app on my IPhone then started rehearsing my songs so I could prepare to record them. I never got to record anything, but since I’ve been in jail I’ve gotten ten times better. I even found out I can sing. I know how influential music can be so I want to use my gifts creating high vibrational music. Music that resonates and uplifts. I’m a romantic individual so I have a lot of love songs I can’t wait to record. God is so good.
“You are in God’s slingshot.” That’s what she said then went on to tell me the story of Joseph and his dreams. Luminati dreams. That’s what I call em. A few weeks before I got arrested I had two dreams. The first one promised a gift. The second one promised a trial. The trial has manifested. The gift is yet to come but I look forward to it. I set my hopes on what God has promised me. MIcah 7:8-9 says, “Rejoice not over me, o my enemy; When I fall, I shall rise; When I sit in darkness the Lord will be a light to me. I will bear the indignation of the Lord because I have sinned against him, until he pleads my cause and executes judgment for me. He will bring me out to the light; I shall look upon his vindication.” Amen, I will.
I trust God’s plan. Throug
h the pain, through the
rain, through the thunde
r.
Luminati dreams I been Luminati dreamin It ain’t what it seems I see things that you ain’t seeing Luminate the night with the essence of my being Luminati dreams I know things you disbelievin’. To be continued. . .
Isaiah Jones I Am From I am from the Belly From Flora and Tellie I am from Dewayne and Adrienne I am from roaches at granny crib I am from family you need to live I’m from Dakeisha and Eric From sternness and merit And from lead don’t follow From losses to lessons and fear no weapons I’m from Yah my salvation From Yah, my God
Until the lion learns to write their own story, tales of the hunt will always glorify the hunter - African Proverb Copyright
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