The Gift God Gave Me
Ray “Top” Woods
The ConTextos Authors Circle was developed in collaboration with young people at-risk of, victims of, or perpetrators of violence in El Salvador. In 2017 this innovative program expanded into Chicago to create tangible, high quality opportunities that nourish the minds,,expand the voices and share the personal truths of individuals who have long been underserved and underestimated. Through the process of drafting, revising and publishing memoirs, participants develop self-reflection, critical thinking, camaraderie and positive self-projection to author new life narratives.
Since January 2017 ConTextos has partnered with Cook County Sheriff's Office to implement Authors Circle in Cook County Department of Corrections as part of a vision for reform that recognizes the value of mental health, rehabilitation and reflection. These powerful memoirs complicate the narratives of violence and peace building, and help author a hopeful future for human beings behind walls, their families and our collective communities.
While each author’s text is solely the work of the Author, the image used to create this book’s illustrations have been sourced by various print publications. Authors curate these images and then, using only their hands, manipulate the images through tearing, folding, layering and careful positioning. By applying these collage techniques, Authors transform their written memoirs into illustrated books.
This project is being supported, in whole or in part, by federal award number ALN 21.027 awarded to Cook County by the U.S. Department of the Treasury.
The Gift God Gave Me
Ray “Top” Woods
I was 15 years old in 1990 and I named myself “High-Top”, then I went to “Hy-Top”, then ultimately “Top.” “Top” means: the highest part, point, surface, or end: The crown of the human head: The highest position or rank: The highest degree, pitch or point… Not knowing at that time, words stick, and I had named myself a place that I was going. At that time between the mid 80’s and early 90’s, the latest hairstyles were high-top fades. I had a tall one with peroxide coloring in it. It was like Kid and Play’s but better.
MynicknamewasoriginallyRay-Ray-Gupuntil1990.That
'stheyearIgotblessedintothe growthanddevelopmentorganizationandwhentheyaskedmewhatdoIcallmyself.Isaid RayRayG,andtheysaidwegotoneofthose.Atthatverymoment,almostinstantlyIstroked myhigh-topfadeupwardandsaid“WellthencallmeHigh-TopG” .
I was young, cute and cool, that's what I was always told. I liked to dress fresh, I liked all the pretty girls, and I always wore cologne because your scent was everything. I started off wearing Aspen, then Joop, then Quorum. I smelled good to myself, so I could imagine what I smelled like to the ladies, especially after a shower “Woo.” I know I'm getting me a phone number. It was like I created my own way of doing things like nobody else did them.
I was different in a good way. I got my first job at Kilwin's Chocolate and Ice Cream at North Pier Mall. I was a fudge maker, big job. Plus I did everything else of course but I was the only one who had been trained in making fudge. So I was making money, in school dressing fresh. Everybody was wearing gold and I was like the only one wearing silver.
I was over the top, rings on each finger, bracelets, chains. I thought I was the flyest thing on two feet til one day at lunch while sitting with the popular kids, boys and girls.
A couple of guys started roasting people, you know signifying. One of the dudes said I looked like the tin man off the Wizard of Oz with all that silver on. Laughter erupted, even the nerds were laughing. I was like sick, destroyed. One of my wings had been clipped in mid flight, “Mayday, I'm going down”. There was no rebuttal or retort. I learned right then and there, gold was better than silver.
That started my wheels to turning, thinking how can I get me some gold? I took my medicine like a man, shook off the joke and vowed to get back without using words. So I went home and told my mother what had happened. I asked her where I could get some gold. She said “Go to the pawn shop, pick out what you want and put it on the lay-away.”
So I went to the pawn shop on North Ave, Milwaukee and Damen and picked out 4 gold rings, a six point star, an anchor, an Indian head and then a letter “R,” then picked out a necklace with an anchor medallion, added two bracelets and a set of gold hoops for my ears. Put everything on layaway and started paying on it every other week and in six weeks I was down to two payments, when I saw that I said naw I’m spending my whole check to get my jewelry out because I was ready and couldn't wait no longer, so I spent my check and lunch money.
I was gon have to borrow some from moms and pops, but they knew why I was asking. So the pawn shop extra cleaned and polished my “J,” bagged it up and I took off. I had bought myself a fresh new Guess outfit and some Harachis for my feet. The next morning as I was suiting up for school, I was smiling because I had created for myself an attitude of gold. I felt different.
The gold had some type of energy radiating through it cuz when I made it to school and was at my locker getting ready for 1st period, I heard the whispers. Then some girls approached like “Whats up Ray, you looking good” Talking about some “Don't you work downtown?”
I was like “Thanks and yeah I work downtown.” Then I was asked if I was coming to lunch. I said “fo sho.” Lunch time came and I couldn’t wait but I was keeping it cool.
Once I got in there I stuck to my routine and got in line, got my lunch with my Minute Maid in the can and walked to the table. Everybody was there, same crew. All eyes were on me, smiles and fake smiles. People got to sayin “I see you. ” This was my first time buying gold and hadn’t realized that I had gone over the top because the gold I had on was twice the size as what everybody else was wearing. Dudes were like “Damn, how much you pay for this, for that?” The girls were like “Do you still got my phone number?” It was on from there. Everything I wore the jewelry with made it pop. It was a great school year.
Then in the Summer of 1993 I received my first felony arrest. I got an I-bond and was set free. Soon after that, I caught another felony case while out on Ibond and they put me on electronic monitoring. I bonded off house arrest. School was starting back and I was going back a senior.
I was excited. I had stepped my entire style up. Upgraded “J” and gear and my hair style. School started and everybody was looking fly. I got one month in before I caught another drug case out on two bonds. It was over. No getting out.
Jagged my senior year. No graduation, no prom. Sitting in the county jail, no bond. I had a new girlfriend with an out of state I.D. and she could visit me everyday. Back then your visitors could bring you white shoes, t-shirts, socks, underwear and my books was loaded. I had fresh everything and was admired and envied because I got visits like crazy. She was coming after work before work and phone calls, so the support was great.
After a few months of going back and forth to court I eventually copped out and for three drug cases I was sentenced two years, three years and three years, a total of eight years. But the deal was if I completed the four months boot camp down state in Dixon Springs, I could go home.
Four monthsfor eight years,that’s a nobrainer.I signed on and was shipped out.It was
like9hours
awayfromChicagolikeW.T.F.
The officers were on business. P.T. (Physical Training), jogging, Sir yes sir, Sir inmate Woods request permission to speak sir. In your face all day calling you names like “dingle berry” and “maggot.” 120 days of hardworking days, cutting down trees with chrome axes, getting stung by wasps. Kill an insect, you got to bury it. Spit on the ground you, you got to wipe it up with your bare hands and put it in your pocket.
The bootcampwasco-edandyou betternotgetcaughtstaringatthe female bootcampers becauseyou couldgeta demeritonyour demeritcardthatyou keepinyour s hirtpocket. You cangeta demeritforanything . Gaping, gigline, thatsyourshirt buttonslinedupwithpants button, bootsnotshined,facenotshaved,nailsnotclipped, bedcornersnotat45deg reeangle. Youworkedhardandyou ategood. Ilovedit, others hatedit. Iwouldgo backthereifIhadthechoice.
I got my G.E.D and my body was in order. I went in 5’9”, 145 lbs and came out 6' 2”, 185 lbs. On my outdate, the bus ride was crazy long. I left at 8am and my bus pulled in at the Greyhound station about 7pm. I had on a white button up, some brown dickie pants with no belt and some white cheerleading shoes known as “white girls.” I had no hair on my face, boot camp cut hairstyle. As I was getting off the bus my girlfriend was standing there with her cousin and they had balloons, teddy bears and two blunts.
I had never smoked anything like that because all I was used to was top papers and that was a new thing. I was happy to see them but not those blunts. I wasn't going to smoke because I knew better. I had to report to the work release center because I had 90 days to do there as a part of my release agreement. After the hugs and kisses we rode to the work release center because I had to go straight there.
So I went to Bolingbrook because that's where their offices were located. Once I arrived, I sat down with a representative and we spoke and I signed a couple of confidentiality forms. Then there was a fee because it cost them to run my idea through the database to make sure it has not been created already. That cost almost $1000.
I checked in and did my 90 and once released I moved in with my girlfriend and her 3 roommates. That lasted for a couple of months until we all split up and went our separate ways. Me and my girlfriend moved to Cabrini Green projects where my mother, sisters and step dad were already living. I had my own room there. Then once there after a while, I plugged in with the building we lived in, 1340 known as “The fabulous 40.” It was now 1994 and I had always had little ideas and was very creative, but this time I had come up with an invention that made me say “I’m about to do this,'' and so I got up with a company called “Inventions Submission.”
After that was completed, I came back because they wanted to talk. You see, you could either sell the idea to them or go all the way. Well I was offered a number that I felt was an insult. Because I was young, they thought I was slow. So I turned down the offer and walked out with my idea and my confidentiality forms because with that they could not steal my idea. For some reason I just gave up and moved on to other things.
There was a dude who lived in our building, rather grew up there, and all the guys knew him. To them he was a nerd-like guy. But I met him and started talking to him and found out that he was into music, rapping and making beats. He asked me if I knew how to rap and I said “I mess around a bit.” He said “Let’s write one,” so we did and we recorded it. Then he told me he had a homie that shoots videos and he asked me if he could shoot a video in the projects because he wasn't plugged like I was, so I said “The guys ain’t gon trip” and “I’ma let them know.”
So I’m telling the guys “We ‘bout to shoot a video, bring out cha whips”. I'm telling them to tell the ladies we need them. I'm even telling them too.
So when the day comes, it's nice outside. Once the camera man shows up, I guess people thought I was bull-shittin, because they were surprised. Then they saw how we were dressed and all the equipment. The guys started to get in motion. My rap partner had called one of his home-girls over. She wasn't even from our projects and she came to shake her stuff. The girls from our projects was not ready, they needed to do this and do that. Time was money because the equipment was only available to us for a certain amount of time. We had to get busy, and we did.
One of my guys bust out the drop top Camaro, Money Green. The only girl we had, she was doing her thing in the drop top. Now the guys started coming out once they seen the action. We rapping while in the cars driving through the projects. It actually turned out nice and that led to the guys talking to our life-long neighbor who played with the music. It also led to me saying “Let's put together a group of acts and let's go on a tour. ” He knew a group and I knew a couple of groups including the group I was performing with.
Once I got my close homeboy on board it was “all systems go. ” We had 2 rap groups, 1 male singing group and 1 female singing group. We had promised every group $500 for the first show they performed. We found a promoter. We were giving this guy money for posters, flyers, and our mini tour. I saw the posters and flyers with our pictures and names. I was like “Hell yeah, its about to go down.”
Our first show was in Clarksdale Mississippi at the Clarksdale Auditorium. We done rented a big ass tour bus. This shit feeling real. All of our acts are ready and excited, plus we coming from Chicago. We bout to send Clarksdale auditorium up. Our people were pumped. We were performing in the evening time. The trip was long, so we rested up. Once we pulled up to the auditorium we were amped. The doors were open to the auditorium.
As we got off the bus I saw our posters everywhere, but, it wasn't a soul out nowhere, so we looking like W.T.F. Where is everybody? So we started unloading thinking “Well they're coming.” So as we got finished, I was standing outside talking to my partner, because me and my homeboy had put up all the money to make this happen and all our guys from our building had came out to support us. I immediately said. “This Mutha-Fucka played us. ” My man ’ s was like “Yup.” So now we calling his phone, no answer. 30 calls, no answer. It's official. He got us.
So while we standing outside the auditorium smoking some weed, having a drink to calm down, 6 black pretty country girls came walking up the block and came to us. I was like, “ladies whats up.” They was like “Hey who is y ’all.” I was like “We from Chicago, we came to perform for y 'all. You see us on the posters that's all over the place.” Ole girl and nem was like “We live here and these posters just got put up today because they was not here yesterday” I was like, “These posters were supposed to be up 2 weeks ago”.
Ole girl them was like “Our whole town would have been here if that happened.” She said “Anything that's happening like this for Clarksdale, Clarksdale is coming.” So I said “Our bogus ass promoter played us.” So ole girl was like “We here, yall want to perform for us?” I said “Fuck it, because our groups was ready to get on the stage.” I looked at it like, this is our group's 1st time about to be on stage. We had rented the auditorium, so we gone use it.
So the ladies took to the seats and we put on a show as if the place was packed. I have to admit, we did our thang. The ladies was going crazy, clapping, screaming and having fun. It was fun. At the end the girls was like “Damn yall did real good, our whole town would have loved y ’all, can y 'all come back next week, cuz we gon tell everybody.” Then we was like “Naw we done lost too much money. ” The bus, the equipment, the auditorium, the acts, the outfits.
We were drained mentally because we trusted somebody and got played. So we went to a hotel because we were leaving in the morning.
The dude we did business with lived in Mays, Mississippi, not too far. So the next morning me and my mans got up early and drove to Mays. We pulled up to his mothers house and she answered the door. We came to hurt the guy, plain and simple, but when his mom opened the door she was so sweet, talking about some “Baby, y ’all have some breakfast.” You can smell it coming out the door. Damn it smelled good. The answer was like “Yes ma ’ am we would love some. ” Red hot sausage links, scrambled eggs, biscuits with syrup and white rice. A Bomb!
Her son wasn't home but he gave us his mothers address. Dirty Dog. We had to chalk it up as a loss. We went back home. Me and my mans were salty, but everybody else had fun. They actually wanted to do it again. I was really with it myself but my homeboy was out and I wouldn't have been able to pull the funds needed to do it by myself, so it was over. At the same time I was battling an illness so physically I was exhausted and mentally debilitated. (But that's a whole nother story coming shortly after this one). The projects got closed down shortly after we moved to the South Side of Chicago, the Englewood area.
I started a social club called “The Boopa City Boys (BCB)”. We had the playboy club house and it went down. Then from that, 3 years later I founded a social club called “Chi City Elite Bosses.” At that time social clubs were the thing. Then I got arrested for gun possession, bonded out, then caught another gun case out on bond. I left 2011 of December and was released January of 2020 but during that time I came up with 25 inventions.
I had been writing, designing and dating them. So in 2021 I chose one and said to myself “I’m finna do this.” I got with a company that was based out in Pittsburg and met a cool guy named Carmen. A guy named Carmen, crazy right?
We went through the routine of searching the database for it or anything like it and we found something like it, but my version was much better.
So we got to talking money. I paid the initial fees, then I started working on the money for my prototype. When I got down to $12,000, I got arrested. I was chasing that money. But I was exercising my right to bear arms so here I am in jail. My invention was scheduled to be in every classroom on earth. My invention would have been in that Texas classroom where that gunman killed our 19 children and 2 teachers and it would have saved some if not all. But I got myself arrested. But this is the amazing part.
Getting locked up this time is the best thing that happened to me. Why I say that? Because after doing a rough 18 months, a pastor came to the tier I was on, and was asking if anyone wanted to come to the Christian tier. For some reason I went out and talked to him and I signed up. Everybody that signed up they came and got them a week later. I was like damn what about me and my cellmate because he signed up too. They came and moved us to the old man tier and we sat there for 1 ½ months. Then one day they came and said pack it up, you going to I-J, the Christian tier. I was like okay. Then once I got there I was a little apprehensive because somebody had started working on me with their belief and had almost got me. But I say God saved me because He plucked me up in the nick of time.
Iwas chosen like everyone else on the Christian tier, because learning who Jesus Christ is is the best thing I’ve ever learned. The pastors, the fellowship, you can'tget this in the worldbecause you got to workandschool, or family or all3. This was the best time to get my attention andHe did. Seeking His Kingdom first, I foundout what Godhas blessedme with. That is the gift ofcreating things thatpeople can use. I am an inventor. After He toldme that, I came up with16 more inventions.
Thankyou Jesus my LordandSavior. So be on the lookoutwhenyou see something withthe name Ray Woods on itinyour house, justknow AllGlory Be to God, In Jesus name Amen.
This the Kicker… The times Itriedtogo forthwiththose other inventions andthey didn'tgo through, itwas because Godwantedme to know andlearn where itcame from. I’mgladHe didbecause IthankHim andpraise Him for the blessing He has equippedme with, so now when Igetoutthis time anddo my invention thing, it's allbecause ofHim.
Oh yeah in 2019 I learned to paint using acrylic and oil paint. So creating in many ways is my gift. I included some pictures of my paintings, check me out.
Ray Woods
I Am From
I'm from Logan Square and Cabrini Green
From diverse neighborhoods and tall buildings
I am from playing Ms Pac-Man and Nintendo
Battling mom and stepdad for the high score
I am from when food didn't make it to the end of the month
My mom had credit at the corner store
And my sisters sat on the couch with their pillows rocking back and forth
I am from a black girl from Mississippi and a black boy from the city
From where my Mama gave me my first joint
And from she said if it don't smell like that, or taste like that,
Step away cuz it's a lace joint
I'm from if you ain't got nothing good to say about a person, don't say nothing at all
From treat people how you want to be treated
From Matthew 6:33, seek first His kingdom and His righteousness
And all these things will be given to you
I'm from Chicago, born at Michael Reese Hospital
From turkey dressing, beef neck bones,
White potatoes and green beans, sweet potato pies and iced tea
From my favorite girl in the world
Ms. Vernacie E. Woods aka Ms. Chocolate, rest in peace
I'm from a strong black woman who taught me loyalty
And cook with love
And loved her children unconditionally
Until the lion learns to write their own story, tales of the hunt will always glorify the hunter - African Proverb