Safe to Shed a Tear: Healing Not Healed

L I O N S P E A K S

The ConTextos Authors Circle was developed in collaboration with young people experiencing, navigating and surviving complex traumas in El Salvador. In 2017, this innovative program expanded into Chicago to create tangible, high quality opportunities that nourish the minds, expand the voices and share the personal truths of individuals who have long been underserved and underestimated. Through the process of drafting, revising and publishing memoirs, participants strengthen self-reflection, critical thinking, camaraderie and positive self-projection to author new life narratives.

Safe to Shed a Tear grows out of the micro-community built by the participants of the Spring 2024 cohort of Authors Circle at Giving Others Dreams. The women whose voices rise from this compilation undertook a complex journey of self-reflection and creation. Every story matters. Every human being has stories to tell. The pages that follow highlight some of them.

The beautiful women met weekly to build community through shared experiences. These are existing narratives about their experiences and about them as a whole. This compilation complicates those narratives as only those who are living those lives can. Turn the pages and be open to meeting these Authors exactly as they are.

This project is being supported, in whole or in part, by federal award number ALN 21.027 awarded to Cook County by the U.S. Department of the Treasury.

"Until the lion learns to write their own story, tales of the hunt will always glorify the hunter."

- African Proverb

In collaboration with:

I N T R O D U C T I O N

What happens when a constellation of stars gather to share truths, dreams, pain, healing and triumphs? A group of women across generations, life experiences, cultures and perspectives…mothers and daughters, grandmothers and grandchildren, sisters and best friends, strangers and new acquaintances cocreating a space to be seen, heard and held in the vibrant, raw truths that reflect authentic lives, questions and heart songs?

We behold the transformative glory of the G.O.D. Women’s Authors Circle.

Informed by Authors Circle Values such as Be Brave, Be Candid, Ask for Help, Offer Support, Seek Diverse Perspectives, Embrace Your Growth, and Embrace Your Truth, we have done what humans have done for centuries. We held space with and for each other to be seen and heard, to reflect, connect and renew ourselves and our life trajectories.

Many a tear was shed, many a laugh was had. While connecting, reading, discussing, drafting, sharing feedback and intense moments, we also skipped, broke bread, listened to music traveling the spiral path of healing every time we gathered. As we complete this part of our journey and you, the reader, hold the harvest of our emotional bravery and collective power in your hands, may you give yourself permission to dive deeply into the pages before you.

The G.O.D. Women’s Circle is a force of nature and shows what is possible when we intentionally hold space for each other and our own complex living stories. The process of this journey has been exquisite, powerful beyond measure. Just as we in Authors Circle have shared our hearts, read and discussed a myriad of memoirs and moments, please give yourself permission to be present in this moment, to embrace the robust symphony of experiences that inform your unique view of life, evolving purpose and personal journey here in EarthSchool. May you continue to nourish your purpose, on purpose. May you continue to seek to celebrate the glory in community near and far, across generations. May you be fully you, a verb!

Blessings,

Lisa Kenner ConTextos Facilitator

Aldena D. Brown

“NO LOVE, NONE GIVEN, NONE SHOWN.”

“CAN’T GIVE WHAT YOU NEVER HAD."

“MISS HER, LOVE HER, CAN’T FORGET HER.”

“TWO YEARS, MISS HIM, HEARTBROKEN.”

ALDENA D. BROWN

M F R O M P O E M

I am from Lucille and Mary

From Pain and Love

I am from 4445 South Evans

To 1541 South Komensky

I am from the smell of pinto beans, rice and fried chicken

The sound of birds chirping

I’m from Teresa Davenport and Sr. Dohna Liette

From restorative justice

And families moving forward.

And from respect and courtesy

Do wrong, wrong will follow

And from there is a time

And a place for everything.

Ma, since you asked, I'll tell you why...

I had to learn on my own. S I N C E Y O U A S K E D

You never took the time to get to know me.

You always made me feel insecure and unsure of myself

Because you used me for your drug gain.

You never taught or showed me how to value and love myself,

You never really showed me love and affection.

You put so much responsibility on me as a kid,

You never apologized and now you ’ re gone.

You always chose drugs over your children

You never showed me how to love.

ALDENA D. BROWN

I lost my mom in 2002

I lost my dad in 1998

I lost my son in 2021

I lost myself when he was murdered

I lost my will to live at some point

I lost my dog pegasus when I was 18

I lost my brother in 2011

I found myself again

I found my will to live again

I found peace with all the loved ones I lost

I found what I want to do and be in life

I found my creativity

Dear Dad,

I was your first born child and I loved you dearly. When I was younger I was told you mistreated me even as an infant. Fighting my mom, throwing me on the floor and you never helped take care of me financially. As I got older I began to see things they said were true!! I still would be happy to see you when I came to granny and grand-dad house (his parents) and you still couldn’t show love!! I was like damn, what the hell wrong with you!? So I left and I did not come to see you until your funeral 1 year later. Daddy, all I wanted was for you to show me attention, affection and some praises that only a daddy can give. Dad, all I wanted was for you to love me!

Aniyha Tamia Tyler Rodriguez

“I LOVED, I LOST, I LIVED.”

"I KAN’T, I WON’T, I DO."

“I’M STRONG, I’M HURT, I’M BETTER.”

“THEY STARE, I LOOK. WHAT’S THAT?”

L O S T A N D F O U N D

H O W T O L O V E M E

ANIYHA TAMIA TYLER RODRIGUEZ

I've lost family and found family

I’ve lost love and found love

I've lost time and found peace

I've lost dreams and found new ones

I've lost fears and found more

I've lost myself and found me over and over

Dear Cuz,

I thank you for loving me for who I am.

Just because I'm your cousin

Thank you for loving me unconditionally, Through everything no matter what.

You my heart, shorty. My first love and my only love.

Love, yo lil big cousin

Leach

ayanna

D E A R L A T A S H A

Dear LaTasha,

AYANNA LEACH

I miss you so much, man. Sister, I know I can't live without you, but every day I try to push through, and sometimes I just want to give up. But I know that you ’ re not with that. I know you ’ re up there smiling down on your little sister, but I have accomplished so much this year alone. It's only up from here. I just wish you was here with me to share those moments and stuff with me. It's not one day I don't think about you, even though when I have them moments only you and I know I be so lost without you here. Me and my kids only. You would have told me to deal with them on certain things. That's why we have a special and personal bond that only us have. Because you know I'm not perfect, but you never judge me or my kids. You show them all the love with open arms. I'm going to keep making you proud. I love you so much and miss you.

Dear Grandma,

When you told me that I was powerful, I see what you were talking about. Because I have achieved so much within this year so far, man. I got two jobs and I have been successful in both of them. So by the end of the year I want to be owning a couple of businesses and a home. That’s what I have, a plan in the making. So I'm going to keep moving forward. I love you and miss you so much. I wish heaven had a phone, because I would have called you and told you everything that's going on with me and my kids. D E A R G R A N D M A

“THINNING BLOOD, ABUNDANCE OF FAMILIAL ANIMOSITY.”

I lost my relationship with my mom over her drug problems

I found friendships that taught me you can make your own family, Blood isn't always thicker than water

I lost being a young child, when I had to raise my mother

I found myself again in motherhood, once I welcomed my son into the world I lost respect for my parents because as a parent I could never do to my son what was done to me

I found power in taking back my control

When I put my pencil to the paper, I never imagined it flourishing into something real. I used to sit and create beautiful art pieces all night long. These pieces would sit in a sketchbook that no one could see. It was private and intimate. I wasn't confident in my talent. You took my art and turned it into something I never imagined. As the ink seeped into my skin, the image came to life. The lines danced around as it developed into the image l created. You gave depth to my imagination. Thank you for allowing me to bring my art into a permanent masterpiece. You turned my drawings into walking art. My ivory skin was a blank canvas. The tattoos so bold that I became a walking portfolio. Each new piece brought to life is a map of my passions, my creativity, my life story. Thank you for allowing me to display our artistry.

Celia Colón

“STOP, BREATHE, FEEL, THINK, MOVE, DANCE.”

CELIA COLÓN

Dear Little Me,

Know that you are worthy of love! You deserve to be protected. You're stronger than you think. You were born for a divine purpose. Your cries are heard. Your wounds will heal. Be kind. Be encouraging, Be gentle, Be patient, Be open. Respect my body, respect my peace. Support my heart, support my dreams. Always make room for just me.

*CheryL*

“SHOULDA WOULDA COULDA, FEAR NOT.”

“I SHOULD HAVE TURNED AROUND.”

“I SHOULD HAVE LOVED YOU DIFFERENTLY.”

“I WOULD HAVE DIED FOR YOU.”

“I AM NO LONGER AFRAID TO MOVE ON.”

I A M F R O M P O E M

I am from Ruth and Ruth

From strength and pain

I am from intelligence, grit, recovery

I am from flowers

Good smells, Growth blooming

I’m from my parents and the streets

From church and prayers and common sense

And from laughter and joy

I’m from you can be anything

And from you are beautiful

I'm from God

I’m from Chi

From collard greens, hot water cornbread

From Ruth

I am from recovery. S I N C E Y O U A S K E D

Kyle, since you asked, I’ll tell you why

I'm so hurt, lost, and grateful!

Because I didn't get to say I love you!

Because I didn't get to see you take your last breath!

Because I didn't get to hold your hand!

Because I didn't even pray!

Because I had faith!

Because I didn't pray!

Because You were so special!

Because You loved me!

Because You came in my dream and gave me a hug!

Because I prayed for God to take your soul,

Forgive us all for our sins and have mercy on us all!!

Because I forgave myself, so did God and you!

L O S T A N D F O U N D

I found forgiveness within myself

I found true friends from my pangs in life

I found encouragement

I found God's Grace and Mercy

I found myself

I found it’s better to know God and not need him than to need him and not know him

I found out how to fake it and cope

D E A R . . . Dear You Know Who,

I just wanted assurance. I needed to be held.

I wanted you to wipe away my boo-boos and tears. You should have shown me kindness and that would have meant the world to me. From *CheryL*

C E L E B R A T E W I T H M E

I didn’t know if I could make it, But I did. Through the shame, guilt, Procrastination, fear.

Being brave.

I wasn’t born in Babylon, I put myself there. I made it out.

God heard my silent tears. I got my Joy Back.

To Whom It May Concern:

I have always been proud of you.

I just wish you could see the greatness in you.

I’m so glad you came into my life finally. It's not completely how I want you, but in due season you will be totally there. I need my pictures. I take my pictures to remember the great times, the smiles and the love. You showed up and showed out. Thank You, Father God!

Cora D

“HEALTH IS THE NEW WEALTH.”

A L E T T E R T O T H E F O U N D E R O F G . O . D . Forgive me as I forgot your name

However your image and your center never left my brain.

I’m at the group you formed and founded, with all the support and women you have gained.

It was about 3 months ago when I first came and your words, advice and affirmations you gave withheld in me and maintained.

I just want to say thank you for your goals that you aimed and reached for, that made a change. That brought many diverse women together. That came despite the drizzling rain.

I ’ M T R Y I N G

I'm trying, I am.

I’m trying to heal.

I’m trying to grow. But it seems I’m at a stand still.

I'm trying to glow.

But it seems as if I'm in a big dark hole.

I keep trying.

I keep pushing.

I may not be lucky. But I got a little bit of Hope.

Dyanna T. Winchester

“CREATED BY GOD FOR HIS GLORY.”

“DEEPER PARTS OF ME SOMETIMES HARD-TO-SEE.”

“COUNT MY BLESSING SO WHY STRESSING?”

“BEAUTY FOR ASHES THAT I AM.”

DYANNA T. WINCHESTER

I am from Rudella Dennis and Diane Dennis.

From sensitivity and caregiving.

I am from granny ' s house, cakes, cooking, silence and gossip.

I am from trees, leaves and the sun.

City blocks, fall leaves, looking up to the sky and the sun.

I’m from Michelle Obama and Mary J. Blige.

From read Michelle’s book and watch Mary perform.

And from strength.

I’m from a disobedient child doesn't live out its days.

And from you don’t think fat meat is greasy.

I’m from the church.

I’m from Chicago.

From chicken, spaghetti, mac and cheese.

From Ms. Willette, Celia, Colette.

I am from trauma, resilience, pain and joy.

God, since you asked, I’ll tell you why I am so angry

Because #1 I have a period (menstrual cycle)

Because I don't understand why there is so much death or is there something I’m not grasping here

Because besides that, that's the only gripe I have with you. S I N C E Y O

Because definitely a conversation has to be had on why you let my son be killed by gun violence.

Because sometimes I ask why people of faith die, when I believe that they had faith. Isn't their faith supposed to heal them?

S I N C E Y O U A S K E D

DYANNA T. WINCHESTER

Mom, since you asked, I’ll tell you why I’m so angry

Because you slept with a married man

Because my dad didn't spend enough time with me

Because you chose my molester over me

Because my dad never acknowledged me to his wife

Because not one adult in my life ever held themselves responsible for the harm that was done to me

Because my innocence was taken from me

Because of some of the choices I made in my own life.

I am angry because I went to prison for 20 years, or am I?

Because I left so many beautiful women still inside

Because I came home to life in shambles

Because I lost my son to gun violence

Because of my retainment of information and how I comprehend don’t come easy

Because my little brother had his health condition and it took his life at a very young age

Because all my loved ones lost, the pain is so real.

Because my mom is old and disabled, still have some good laughs

Because I have been held accountable, still no justice for me

Because of the history that I didn't know that now I've been exposed to, it would have been nice to know it sooner

Because at the end of the day it really doesn't matter, this exercise just helps me process the truths of the matter.

L O S T A N D F O U N D

DYANNA T. WINCHESTER

I was lost when I was born into deception

Found love in my grandmother's arms as she cared for me

I lost my innocence to my molester at the age of 9

Found comfort in a blunt, I named him Ale White. Ale was my new best friend and companion

I lost my way, never knew if I ever found it because I was in constant survival mode

I found it at age 17 when I forgave my molester

Only to lose hope when my father passed away

1 week before my 18th birthday

I found myself in prison for so many reasons, I lost 20 years of my life

I found some wonderful women during that time, kinda lost my way a few times

I found my way back after they told me I would lose time, that's when I drew the line

I lost my son after 9 months of being home, still haven't found my peace with that. My heart is kinda cold

I strive every day to find what I’ve lost.

Only to be where I am, a miracle that the devil lost.

C O M E C E L E B R A T E W I

DYANNA T. WINCHESTER

This season that I’m experiencing is so raw and real.

It’s like I have a new life without knowing where to begin.

I went from knowing my every day

To someone else having to wipe my ass for me.

A speedy recovery though it may seem,

I press to surrender to God every day.

Resisting temptation that rises up in me.

Also the potential that awaits me,

What am I waiting for?

I have a book within me!

Who's going to celebrate me?

It lies within me,

So much trauma, truth, pain, resilience and joy.

The miracle God has brought forth,

I can’t remember a thing.

Just know that God did it!

I heard people say that God provides.

I am a witness to what he can do for you.

What is God’s plan for me?

I’m truly waiting to see!

His story revealed for me.

Edie jones

“DETAILS THAT ONLY YOU CAN WRITE.”

EDIE JONES

I am from Elsie Freeman

From love and religion

I am from Bolingbrook,

Where I went with my great-grandma everywhere.

Me and my cousins love to be, to escape gunshots, ambulance or police

Sirens in our community.

I am from woods,

Birds chirping, water dripping, silence.

I’m from Steven Kimble and Andrea Freeman

From credit repair and from determined

I’m from “You ain’t got no friends”

And from “Don’t believe everything you hear”

I’m from God

I'm from Chicago, Illinois

Michael Reese Hospital

From barbecue, dressing, chitlins, greens

From boss lady

I am from blessed

EDIE JONES

L O S T A N D F O U N D

I found love

I found stability

I found humbleness

I found forgiveness

I found what completes me and what it takes

I found out what's real and what's fake

I found patience

I found space

Most of all I'm glad I found this space.

Feeling lost like 2 seeds in the dirt, over-drowned in water, more like the struggle of the world not knowing the outcome of growth or life.

But seasons change then the sun shines and the flowers bloom from the seed. Like when you find your way of life through growth and self care and you shine with success for once. You were the seed with no direction and now you have a beautiful scent, for your seed has blossomed to the beautiful flower that you are.

S I N C E Y O U A S K E D

H O W T O L O V E M E

EDIE JONES

Michael J, since you asked I’ll tell you why I’m so at peace but still hurt.

Because you didn't listen to me, God felt it was better for you to be with him.

Because it hurts to look at your kids, to see your resemblance, but I love to see them for your resemblance.

Because I watched mama and our sister cry for a whole year, but I love how they all bounced back and accomplished their goals.

Because I kept your bloody shirt I wrapped around your head, to keep it, only it wouldn’t let me let you go, but to get rid of it freed my soul.

Because you prayed so much when you came home, only to tell me you were praying for us.

Because you left me to narrate to our sister even though it helps me to understand your daughter.

Because you didn’t give up on me when I gave up on myself!!!

Dear Self,

It’s ok to say no.

It's ok to not explain yourself, include no one else, stop pleasing people, distance yourself.

There's nothing wrong if you want to help, but as long as you don't take it from self.

At this point, I put myself on a shelf. Playing hide and seek to find myself.

Givers have to have a limit because takers will take ‘till there's nothing left. This time they are going to miss me cause I have nothing left.

I have helped and it wasn’t that hard, cause I found the answer, by putting myself on the shelf.

Flecha

S I N C E Y O U A S K E D

MaMa, since you asked, I’ll tell you why I’m so hurt.

Because I can't be around my brothers!

Because they hurt me!

Because they lied!

Because they talk bad about me to strangers!

Because one of them tried to run me over!

Because one of them stole from me!

Because I don’t even miss them!

Because I just want them to die in peace!

Because in my heart they already Died.

L O S T A N D F O U N D

I lost my house

I lost my sanity

I lost my confidence

I lost my happiness

I lost my faith

I lost my trust

I lost my feelings

I found real love late in my life

I found G.O.D.

I’m finding myself again

I’m working to reclaim the old me

H O W T O L O V E M E

Love me, As I am

Love me when I'm sad

Love me when I’m angry

Love me when I’m silenced

Love me when I’m sick

Love me when I’m busy

Just love me 100%

As I love people

D E A R . . .

Dear Soul,

I am sorry for leaving you behind, thinking that I didn’t need you.

I know that I need you back in my life. I look back, I know you never left. You’re just waiting for me to claim you back.

“FOR THE LOVE OF LIFE, FAMILY.”

“SELF-LOVE, SELF-CARE, SUPPORT, HOPE AND PRAYER.”

“PUT GOD FIRST! PUT GOD FIRST!”

LaTanya M. Johnson

LATANYA M. JOHNSON

I am from the southwest side of Chicago (Englewood community)

From poverty, violence, food deserts and lack of resources.

We are living paycheck to paycheck.

I am from family gatherings, loud music, & BBQs.

Now I’m all grown up and I just want to relax in a comfort zone.

I am raised by my mom Barbara and Grandma Arlee

From poverty and a bad school system

I am from the mud to the boots on the ground

I am from sounds of birds chirping and blowing wind

In the morning as the sky lights up

I’m from Barbara and Darrel

From being my riding buddy across the city to praying for you to Rest In Peace

And from minding my business to minding the business that pays you!!

I’m from “My daughter does a great job, I support her!!!”

I’m from Chicago (the Chi)

From chicken noodle, Taco Tuesday, Ladies Night, Church on Sunday

From Kathy D. (Godmother)

I am from trials and tribulations, waiting for the doors to open. The End.

S I N C E Y O U A S K E D

L O S T A N D F O U N D

David aka DayDay, since you asked,

I’ll tell you why I’m so Angry.

Because they were your friend!

LATANYA M. JOHNSON

Because you guys went to the same school!

Because you ' re my little brother, I'm supposed to protect you!

Because MaMa said to stay in front of the house!

Because you were fun-loving!

Because your white teeth! And beautiful smile!

Because your dark skin and fine!

Because the streets don’t like you!

Because Jail is set up for the black man!

Because they shot you! To death!

I’m mad as hell!

Because you ' re dead, he walk free!!!

I was lost on what God put me here to do, I found out it was to work with our children.

I was lost on how to connect with others, I found out by talking, speaking and sharing information, opened up doors.

I really haven't found peace, but I learned to deal with it. Peace be still.

I was lost as a young mom on how to raise 3 children, I found the love and support of caring souls (mom plus others). I learned how to be the best parent to my children that I can be.

I lost and found love on a 2 way street.

H O W T O L O V E M E

LATANYA M. JOHNSON

Won't you come celebrate with me, Putting hard work in to build your community. I didn't have the resources to build me. Born in Englewood, I didn't have much but I worked it out.

It’s a thin line between love and hate.

Left hand is holding fear and the right hand is holding faith.

Never walk with sight, always walk with God!

Dear 5yr to 13yr old me,

Because I lived in an impoverished community. Because the color of skin matters if I have access or not.

Because I always wanted to get the things my friends had. Because my friends travel, they went to family houses for summer vacations, summer trips, family outings, due to my mom having to take care of 7 children, we couldn't afford it.

Because embracing with hugs, kisses, “I love you ” wasn’t pushed upon me, I didn't know how to give it out.

Because school wasn't a big help to me, I passed kindergarten thru 8th grade with bad grades!!!

Because in 11th grade there was a shoot out at school and I never went back.

Because I became a teen mom, one kid walking, one in arms, one in belly.

I had to find my way!

A girl from Englewood!

Lluvia Li

“COFFEE. DOESN’T WORK. STARTS TO CLEAN.”

“TO

LIE IS TO CARE, TO CARE IS TO LIE.” “TOO MANY WORDS, NOT ENOUGH SPACE.”

“HAVE TO BUT I’LL FORGET. AGAIN.”

“PLEASE SHARE. THANK YOU! I FORGET.”

I A M F R O M P O E M

I am from mami & chochi

From community and individuality

I am from the hood

With the skunky smell

With a lullaby of tears, laughter, crude music & “fireworks”

I have brown earth in my skin,

Water in my veins, air in my lungs, and fire in my heart

I’m from mami and papi

From protest in the street to cheetos on the couch

And from structure & chaos

I’m from aye mi burro, aye mi burro

And from sana sana colita de rana

I’m from the universe and the universe is me

I’m from the hood

From beans and rice to burgers and fries

From mami and chochi

I am from love and pain to love and gain

S I N C E Y O U A S K E D

L E T T E R T O U S

LLUVIA LI

Mundo, since you asked, I'll tell you why I'm so unsure of our future.

Because our winters are now summers.

Because the snow is no longer cold.

Because the rain now burns.

Because the air is unbreathable.

Because our food is inedible.

Because the coast is drowning.

Because the stars cannot be seen.

Because the animals are dying.

Because image is more valued than reality.

Because money is worth more than life.

Bitch please, just chill out

Bitch please, just listen

Bitch please, you are hilarious

Bitch please, stop over-thinking, it’s not that serious

Bitch please, you need to relax

Bitch please, I need a break

Bitch please, I know who you are

Bitch please, you know I love you

Bitch please, say it again

Bitch please, I know you are me!

I found my right shoe

I lost my left shoe

I found my wireless headphones

I lost the headphone case

I found that family is chosen

I lost my fear of losing

I found my identity

I lost my insecurity

I found pictures of memories long forgotten

I lost my camera of pictures in Hawaii

I found out the world is evil

I lost my need to contribute to it

I found the strength within myself

I lost my weakness and doubts

I found a group of women that are unfathomably powerful

I found that love is a spectrum of colors and forms

I lost the need to appeal to all

I’m starved. I’m hungry for justice

Hungry for peace and clarity.

For something sweet. The sweetness of freedom.

I can cook. I can bake.

But both make a mess. The mess before organization

Once it's cleaned

I am satisfied.

But there is always a mess

And I am always starved. I’m hungry for justice

Hungry for peace and clarity

Everlasting hunger.

Nakobe Martin

“EVEN WHEN YOU’RE SAVED, SAVE LIFE.”

“FORGIVE, LOVE, TRUST, FORGET, LET GO.”

“PRIORITIZE SELF-CARE, LOVE, HOPE, CHANGE, HELP.”

“LOVE YOURSELF FIRST BY ANY MEANS.”

“TRUST GOD LEADS YOU. RIGHT DIRECTIONS.”

S I N C E Y O U A S K E D

I am from Donna Martin

From a powerful and strong woman

NAKOBE MARTIN

I am from 8805 South Muskegon to 8518 South Exchange

The community of gunshots and violence

I am from the hood, the trenches

I’m from mom.

From the jump rope and singing contests

Strong minded and helpful

I’m from “Believe in yourself”

I’m from Trinity Hospital, Chicago

From pasta, chicken, macaroni

I am from Chicago, The Windy City.

Dad, since you asked, I’ll tell you why I’m so angry.

Because you were never here!

Because we don't have a relationship!

Because I don't know you!

Because I want to know you but I can’t!

Because you let me down!

Because you hurt my feelings!

Because you were never honest, you lied!

Because you betrayed me!

Because you made a promise you couldn't keep!

Because you never apologized for how you made me feel!

D E A R . . .

To Self,

L O S T A N D F O U N D

NAKOBE MARTIN

You are enough, you are amazing, you know your worth. You are a phenomenal woman. You are incredibly talented. You will make it. You are awesome, I love you!

To Mom,

I love you so much. You are the most amazing woman ever.

You have taught me everything I know.

I am appreciative to have a mom like you.

YOU ARE AMAZING!

I lost myself when I dwelled on the past for too long.

I lost myself when I got heartbroken.

I lost myself when I repeatedly lost family members.

I lost myself when friends betrayed me.

I lost myself when I got fired from my previous job.

I lost myself when I was very insecure.

I found myself.

I found a job I actually love.

I found peace and love.

I found out how to love myself more.

I found out how to live life.

I found how to embrace my insecurities.

I found out the person I am.

I found my drive.

I found out how to love again after a heartbreak.

I found out you need to just live in the moment & not the past.

S I N C E Y O U A S K E D

Mom, since you asked, I’ll tell you why I’m so irritated.

Because you won’t stop doing drugs

Because you sheltered me my whole life and it's harder for me to do things on my own, since I'm so used to you holding my hand.

Because you choose to buy drugs with the money I give you, that you say is going to bills or something useful and you lied.

Because you always think you ' re right about everything and never want to listen to what I got to say.

Because you always think that whenever I say I need a break or when something is wrong with me, you think it's about a boy.

Because you won’t stop smoking or check your health like you should.

Because you won't look for a job, but want to be all in my pockets.

Because you make me feel guilty about wanting to take a break from school when I explain to you that I don't have a passion and want to find out what I really like.

Because when I was pregnant you made me feel guilty about wanting to get an abortion.

Because sometimes you made me feel like you were not supporting me.

L O S T A N D F O U N D

Things I lost

Friends because they were too toxic and always had bad energy

My baby because I had a miscarriage

Self respect because I was around a guy who kept putting his hands on me and I would continue to go back

My cat named “Diva” because she ran away and never came back

My great-grandmother due to Covid

My mind when I got my first heartbreak

The passion of going to school to major in criminal justice

Things I found

God

Peace

Amazing and strong women in my women ' s group

Self-validation

Confidence again

H O W T O L O V E M E

Dear Self, Love yourself. It's ok to set boundaries. It's ok to say no.

Start putting yourself first and know that your feelings matter.

Don’t let someone make you feel like you are not worth it.

Remind yourself every day that you are enough, loved, intelligent, beautiful, unique, and the list can go on.

Don’t let people treat you any way or put their hands on you.

You have a big heart and you deserve someone who’s going to treat you the way you deserve to be treated.

Learn to forgive yourself for certain decisions you made in life and just focus on what you can fix now, don’t live in the past.

Respect your body, not everyone deserves it. MONAY W

M F R O M P O E M

De PachaMama, the Earth. The soil, same color of mi peel.

From wounds of flesh torn open, caverns beyond measure.

PERENNE

I am from hidden contamination, waters flowing with fluids of (others’) wrongs.

I am from the Wilds, the Windy, the Windings. The overflow of rivers & Hope.

Hidden paths that lead & are led, by the breaths of Life. Browns, blacks, greys, merging into blues, greens, yellows & the rest of Memory.

I'm of those that slip & stumble, those that dust themselves off. Scraped knees, Dirt covered, scraped knees, with tears in the corner of their eyes. Who, breathe deeply, leap & Persist.

A M F R O M P O E M ( C O N T . )

I have grown: I too have fallen, I too have Risen, tattered, torn, yet Vibrant.

I am from Kiko & Lluvia, Bursting with Love & Wonderment. (Determination & Attainment).

I am from Beauty & Magic.

I am from punishment & Possibility.

From being shut down. And from the Need to Stand.

I'm from the ash of the past, Jeweled with droplets of clouds, Bountiful family & Blessed multi-community.

I'm from extinction of Hope & limitless arenas of color: Dream Culture that stitches the Soul to breathe.

I A M F R O M P O E M ( C O N T . )

I'm from south Zhigaagong, Chicago.

From masa, from beans, mangos & aguacate.

I'm from the double mirror, from mi, & the past I cannot hide.

I am from pain that transforms into Aim.

P R A Y E R T O O P E N E S S

To those that have left mi behind:

I am made of Stars.

I am LOVE.

I am a Movement.

To those that I am invisible to:

I am a Healer.

I am Guided.

I am Full.

To those that see mi weaknesses & prey upon them:

I will Survive.

I will Thrive.

I am Burning.

I am liquid.

I am Water.

P R A Y E R T O O P E N E S S ( C O N T . )

To those that have passed over mi:

Mi HeArt is wounded…

Yet, I rebuild.

I am dust.

Yet, I am clay.

I have Memory & form.

I am small.

I am All that u say that I am; I take that as a Challenge.

I sit at a loss.

I am a mere thing w folds & wrinkles.

Praying to Love miself more.

Praying to be seen by mi.

Praying I am what I Believe.

Though I am Herstory/Theirstory.

I am present.

I am the coming.

I am all I see.

H O W T O L O V E M E

Querida- Yo, Queridx Amor, Amores y Amistades,

I have become mi own note-taker For the forgotten, was once Alive.

These are:

Notations of accolades, Of asks. Of Hopes. Of measures.

I scribble these records to conjure: Actions, Of dues.

Reminders: Of self obligations.

I Love.

A somewhat repetitive summon, like melodious hechizos.

From silent screams of Ancestrial Strength, beholden with epistles, to soft reminders in the wafting air. Catch the breeze, that bellows & blows, Fierce scents that reAwaken.

O W T O

Tattooed in collective Memory.

I am Love.

Heights taller than Mohawk skyscrapers, Antennas of slender blinking brightnessAwareness.

Thickening Clouds of Blessed precipitation, Pouring down a Fury of promises kept & unkept. YetI grow Love.

To paths that wind amongst free hills, Long tall swaying Prairie grasses to, watery moss covered, Stalagmite caverns teaming with life.

Echos of the Might & Mighty, Possibilities never rare.

Memories of ways long begotten, Resurge.

I give Love.

A Devine labyrinth, Laden with spacious echoes of plenty.

H O W T O L O V E M E ( C O N

I know Love.

How do we Love thee?How do I Love mi? Listen. Be attentive. The tones are Rich & Supple. Words given… reactions hidden.

Sentiments, Ups & downs, Of song- less words, the dance:

Perceive the phrases that slip in their entiretylisten to the spoken.

How I say, when I say. What I say.

I ask for Love too...

Not strict plans but emotions set to maneuver... I ask in mere words, I request in movable languages.

H O W T O L O V E M E ( C O N T . )

Love mi

Study mi as if I were a skill,

A gift, A beginning.

A complete Whole.

Movement that consists of fever & flowers & fierce Vigor.

Mi-

A Substance you needed to exist. A Phenomenon.

A drop of water in the desert.

A Blaze in the cold.

A morsel amongst famine.

You-

Lead & yet follow mi, Guide into the space I fear.

Grasp mi hands, Clasp the light that assists in continuing.

H O W T O L O V E M E ( C O N T . )

When I whisper, Hold it. if you do not comprehend, remember the words are not for the weak nor wind but for Sake.

A stake.

When I cry, shout o howl: Please remember those moments are meant for growth. I humble. I am unabridged. Yet, I am a work in process, progress unseen & yet in immense development. Love is an action. Gestation.

L O S T A N D F O U N D

I Lost La Verguenza, (If u run across itdon't Stop to chat, sniff o pick up...)

I Lost The shame of mi being: the same shade of moist wood, of coffee grounds & Xocolatl.

I am losing the lack of love for faults, for the visions, for ideals, They are not less valid Though they have yet to surface, In the eyes of masses.

For this person I can never leave behind, We are binding, We are same.

Staying & swaying, weaving Life in different lights...

I pass the why, & stepped into the do.

L O S T A N D F O U N D ( C O N T . )

The mi that was created amongst lost souls, whose only concern, was the brightening light.

But I build.

The same self, whom I know all her stories first hand. & still wince, I do waver to imagine & understand, Where was I at, when I made those decisions, Remembering it wasn't always a choice.

How I would do life over, if I had the chance.

Still waiting to gain..

I Lost

The Need to be other than mi, This I can not undo, Even though, the path could be simpler.

Shadows of others that covered mi face.

I Found Shamelessness as a force.

L A V I D A , S U P

Pa' Mis Bbs,

Mis AmorXs, Mis Locuras y Mis Ánimos,

A Qué mundo les jaléY ustedes me cargan.

La Luz Brilla Colorida,

Flores crecen del asfalto...

Hasta lxs aves salen por la noche.

Tlazocamati

Chi Miigwetch

¡GRACIAS!

¿Qué hice tan Maravilloso, en Mi Vida pasada...

Para merecerles a ustedes Como Bendiciones y Guía?

Haría de nuevo, días y noches con ustedes Mil veces,

Y lo Mejoraría. Voy adelante, Voy con Propósito.

Natasha Yolanda Cazares (NYC)

“MOM DON’T DIE. DAD IS DEAD.”

O

NATASHA YOLANDA CAZARES (NYC)

Time flies, but so does distance.

Out of sight, Out of mind.

The distance to love from hate.

Time lost soon to be found.

A story not ready to end.

Eternal love that aggravates my life.

Hija no eres pero eres mio.

My daughter not, but still mine.

Live life to the fullest extent.

Life is so precious, life is short.

Finding ourselves through trials and tribulations!

Soft inside, but hard from reality.

Not close, but love runs deep.

One call away from coming here.

Me and titi love and fight.

Time well spent, but never lost.

Love and loss, strengthened by healing.

Communication is key, understanding is realization.

Time is temporary, love is deadly.

I’m he, stop calling me she.

Time is precious, don’t lose it.

I Love You! What! Not Ready!

Honesty is not keeping from me.

This Bitch here too Fucking raw.

Stubborn to live, stubborn to die.

Survival of death multiple times over.

NATASHA YOLANDA CAZARES (NYC)

I am from 3 women who bore 4, and of them bore 1

From waves of emotion and open minded feelings and all intimacy

I am from sounds, smells, & of taste a bunches, I love my Munchies

I am from the beach, the waves of the sea that overlap the sand and the shine the water and sun leaves against your skin

I’m from My 6 children, My grandbaby Alyana and My man J

From the depth of communication and music

And from sensitivity, strength, loyalty and chaos

I’m from “apprende que no voy a durar toda tu vida” (“learn because I won’t last your whole life”)

And from you got to do it on your own or you will never learn

I’m from my faith in God and my belief in energy

I’m from Chicago, Humboldt Park

From Pasteles and pernir to tamales and tacos

From Fefo prima/hermana I love you, My only sistA Erica, and from Celia you already know…

I am from Joy yet I am from Pain.

I AM ME!

S I N C E Y O U A S K E D

NATASHA YOLANDA CAZARES (NYC)

Bobby, since you asked, I’ll tell you why I am so emotional.

Since you asked, I'll tell you why.

I’m angry because you were not supposed to die, When I was the one on my deathbed begging you to take care of our children.

Since you asked, I’ll tell you why.

I’m angry because you tried to get clean for our granddaughter, and you Begged for help when I gave in, but the drugs still took you two weeks prior

Since you asked, I'll tell you why.

I'm sad because our children are reliving the tragedy of losing you every day!

And I have to see them hurt!

Since you asked, I'll tell you why.

I'm sad because our children still can't accept,

Telling me mom, I can't call dad, it gets me upset!

Since you asked, I'll tell you why.

I'm upset because I know you tried!

Since you asked, I’ll tell you why.

I'm upset DAMMIT! You Were Not Supposed To DIE!

Since you asked, I'll tell you why.

I’m FUCKING PISSED! THAT BITCH!, left you there to lie! 4 hours “WHAT THE FUCK” WHY!

Since you asked, I'll tell you why.

I’m FUCKING PISSED! THAT BITCH!, had the audacity to cry, while winding down all high!

Since you asked, I’ll tell you why.

You portrayed this lie image of me, now our kids don’t want shit to do with your family.

Since you asked, I'll tell you why.

Me and your kids can't get past, Why You're Flying high in the sky.

H O W T O L O V E M E

NATASHA YOLANDA CAZARES (NYC)

Dear, Well all my kids for that matter, Do let me tell you how you do love me. I’m saying what I am saying in the beginning. To acknowledge how you have loved me before I tell you. I don’t have instructions or directions, but I will instruct you in the direction on how to love me. My handsome intelligent outspoken son Jose, the one who always seems to amaze me and teach me in ways I don't know and open my eyes to everlasting smarts. I love you. You have helped show me how to be a mom and transform into a woman. Natacia now becoming Nate, my loving caregiving, ever-giving child. I love you dearly no matter what. We all have each other, we adore you. I never want you to feel alone. I want you to know that I will forever be grateful for all that you do and apologize at the same time for having to become Mommy/Daddy #2. Fantasia, my beautiful daughter, I’m cute & I know it! My own forever attitude, the needle in my behind that keeps me on my toes. I know you ' re jolly, witzy, & wild. You can live your life how you want, but remember you ’ re my child. I love you and understand I used to be you! To my boy version of me. My I don’t give a FUCK! yet humble and smart son Robert. My one, only and forever my Papi. I could never underestimate you because you always seem to exceed my expectations. I feel sometimes I don’t have what it is to teach you how to be a man because I am not a male, but mommy can teach you to prevail. I'm sorry dad’s not here to tell you ya can, but know that I am proud to call you my young man. You’re doing great with all you have in your hands. You got this Mi Papasito! MA loves you.

O W T O

NATASHA YOLANDA CAZARES (NYC)

My Amores, my heart, what was once the gum on my shoe Elizabeth, oh you meany, I love you! My young woman and now a mommy too! I have to say though, I didn’t want it to happen and yet so soon and fast, I’m glad you know more at your age than I did in my past. I hope you see now why mom is always on your ass. You have a daughter of your own now, whom I love so much so understand I just want for you to give her the right touch. To my Precious Victoria no matter how old you get you will always be my baby girl. The one that always feels like why me! I love you and I sure do see, yes I know. But I want you to know you are me. Take what you know, your older siblings and cousins and all that you see, put it together, learn from it and as you have been you will naturally come to be. And continue to be the bigger, better person that you are because that's what makes you the brightest star. And to my Alyana Grandma's Little chunky peanut. You truly are my world. You not only gave me my life back, but you put it back on track. Only 7 months and already your smarts amaze me! Let me tell you before you were even born you were my light. The inspiration that gave me back my life. I love you to infinity and that don't describe how much enough. You are the one that took me from dying to living. You are the one who made me go from weak to tough. Because baby, things were really rough. I remember crying and praying to meet you and I can barely move. That's when I gave him my all and knew I had to get in a groove of moving and walking because even talking was hard to do. But I know that I couldn't leave this earth without being there for you and your mom too. Mommy is only 16, what am I going to do! I had to bring myself back from dying because you need me and Grandpa's going, too. And baby girl I just wanted you to get older and read this and know that Grandma thanks you.

O W T O

NATASHA YOLANDA CAZARES (NYC)

“HOW TO LOVE ME”! A step by step guide, so they say. OH! Man if I had one of those things, when that happened that day. I love and loved you all in all the ways I knew and know best. So know that love is hard, no instructions, no directions, no games, no tests. Love comes to those the way they were taught. So just love the way you know best! Love me, respect me, acknowledge me, notice me, nourish me, care for me, understand me, prioritize me, cherish me and Honor me. Because I am your mother & grandmother. Because I am yours irreplaceable and I’m all you get. Because God said so. Because I said so. Love me all the time even when you ’ re mad at me and being disrespectful and don’t see it. Respect me because as you get older you will realize Mom is right. Acknowledge me just because I’m your mother/grandmother and I do and will do it all for y ’all, and yes! Just because. Notice me and all I do and not just when you want to. Nourish me just by loving me and doing as I ask of you. Care for me and not just when I’m sick or when you want something because needing and wanting are 2 different things. Understand me I do all I do because I can, I will, I’m right and I know it and because I do all I do because it’s what’s best for you. Hello you ’ re my children you are me and I am you! Prioritize me as you all are my priorities my number ones. Cherish me I can’t go into detail about this, I don’t want y ’all in your feelings, just cherish me. Honor me dammit, because I’m yours. “Honor thy Mother & Father!” God said so! And I have been both. So Honor me because I am your Mother and I said so!!!

I WILL LOVE ALL OF YOU FOREVER AND ALWAYS!!! NO MATTER WHAT!!!

LOVE MOM (NYC)

L O S T A N D F O U N D

NATASHA YOLANDA CAZARES (NYC)

I lost my innocence at the age of 5, but I found that don't define who I am at 15.

I lost myself trying to grow up and be mom at 12-13, but I found myself through my children.

I lost all the male figures in my life, at one point or another, but I found I had all I needed in my stepfather, no! my pa.

I lost my mind in a state of ptsd, but I found that I am the one who controls my mentals.

I lost my children in the process of fighting for Daddy’s moral support, I found that I didn't lose them as long as I did not give up on us.

I lost my best friend due to disloyalty, but I found in the end she wasn't a friend at all, but just someone trying to get all I had and wanted.

I lost my sister in battles of molestation, the do’s and the don'ts, but I found it in me to love her again for it was not her or in her control.

I lost the father of my kids suddenly! FUCK fentanyl, cocaine, crack, heroin, diesel, DMT, and all drugs and dealers for that matter and that’s just how I feel! But I found life within life when god took him from us and I had to fight for mine, when I went from dying to sailing in life.

I lost my son when he found out I was abused and who his father was, but he found me again when he realized mom ’ s cries and all the whys.

I lost my ways, with all the evil eye in my own family, but I found them again with self care, self love, and cleansing.

I lost every person I was with, but I found someone who‘s been within reach all along and he is my wonderful, my calm.

W O N ’ T Y O U C O M E C

NATASHA YOLANDA CAZARES (NYC)

Won’t you come celebrate the 12yr old me, for what I have become, my life becoming undone, my innocence stolen and woven, having no choice to become MOM! A WOMAN!!

Won’t you come celebrate the growing me, on my own, figuring it out, and learning how to be.

Won’t you come celebrate the women I came to be. Still learning, still fighting.

But I was able to raise mine just by being loyal to me.

Won’t you come celebrate the women in me, who overcomes all obstacles, NOTHING STOPS ME!!!

Staci P. (GiGi)

“SCARED, QUESTIONS, TEARS, QUIET, LISTEN, FAITH.”

“SISTAH!! WONDERING, TALLER, CROWN STRAIGHTEN.”

“MY SUPERPOWER IS ME, WHAT’S YOURS…?”

“KING SEEN, QUEEN FELT, I’M ME.”

“STOLEN, BEATEN, SURVIVED, NOT TRUE!! AMERICA.”

I am from Mary and Flo

From Big Attitude and Big Heart

I am from knowing and feeling loved, but not yet hearing the words

I am from the park

STACI P. (GIGI)

The swings, having picnics in the grass, camping outside And playing with friends

I’m from Freda and Bre

From singing

And from giving

I’m from “You’re spoiled”

And from “You’re the baby“

I’m from the great “I am ”

I’m from Chicago, the wild wild hundreds.

From family gathering, driving down south and 2 day bbq weekends

From Bremonstine

I am from unbreakable.

Dear Self,

To Love me is easy but constant. To Love me is silent but to the outside it speaks volumes. I don’t need flashy things, just to watch the Food Network. To Love me is laying on the couch rubbing my head. To Love me is to be mentally connected, able to talk about everything and nothing at all. To Love me is to be apart but can still feel when I need to hear from you. To Love me is being able to and wanting to help others. To Love me is to never lie, Never lie to me. To Love me is to take time and listen to My body, My mind, and My God. To Love me is to be me. To Love me is to not change who I am to please others. To Love me is to love me and be me.

Part A

When I found out I was pregnant after leaving my ex (we were still tippin around)

STACI P. (GIGI)

Which was stupid on my part because I left him after I caught him cheating on me. Soooooo stress on top of stress and disappointment in myself. All I could do was Pray. That's when I realized Prayer changes everything, Jesus got me through the stress, depression and disappointment. I've been Praying every day since and that was 25 yrs ago.

Thank you Father, Jesus & Holy Spirit.

Part B

I feel the writer's confidence in herself.

I was raised by my Father

Soooooo once I became a Mother, I had to figure out what Motherhood was all about. The writer only had herself as a model, which was the same with me becoming a Mother.

a lot of uncertainty but confidence that it would work out.

I lost my mother and found my confidence I lost my father and found my stride

I lost my ex and found my faith

I lost a so called friend and found my tribe

Tammy Flores

“DON’T LOOK AT YOUR GLASS HALF EMPTY WHEN IT’S ACTUALLY HALF FULL.”

“TO LOVE, TO LAUGH, TO LIVE.”

A M F R O M P O E M

TAMMY FLORES

I am from Reine Flores (my mother) and Aunt Cookie.

From Rosie who taught me to be a giver.

My father named me after a song, “Tammy’s In Love”

I’m from Reine Flores (my mother) and Henry Hank Martinez

From cooking, sewing, family gatherings

Very giving, helping everyone,

My mom and aunt.

And from not giving a man your money, it’s a sin.

I’m from God.

I’m from Bush-Chicago, Illinois.

From brisket, chicken, liver, potatoes, rice and beans.

I am from a beautiful Polish lil lady and a Spanish man

That could fix anything.

I’m lost without my parents.

Zakia Leach (Shorty)

ZAKIA LEACH

I am from Ida Rucker Thomas & Catherine Leach Bolton

From greatness and strength

I'm from 9934 South Throop

I am from light

Light can’t be caught or captured

I’m from Sherita and Sharon

From going to MCI for mentorship classes

And from intelligence

I'm from a strong willed family of women

And from I can do whatever I put my mind to

I’m from Greater Metro Church of Christ

I’m from Chicago

From soul food Sunday

From greedy cut

I am from greatness and strength.

H O W T O L O V E M E

ZAKIA LEACH

There is no magic formula on how to love me. Start with my rise, love me in my rarest form. Acts of service are great first thing in the morning. When I am carrying the weight of the day. Show me how I need you to love me. Love me when I'm weak, Love me when I'm too strong, Love me when I don't love myself.

I'm not perfect but I can say I love me. How to love me is simple, Pay attention and give me my just due. How to love me is simply how I love you.

H O W T O L O V E M E S T E P B Y S T E P

ZAKIA LEACH

I wanna be loved in a way that we don’t understand, but it is necessary.

Love me without the ego.

Love me in a way that time loses itself.

Love me from my nape to my heels.

I need you to love me with trust and understanding.

Love me when I’m wrong.

Love me with respect and adoration. I love slow walks through the park,

Late night dinner dates, Flowers and cards.

You know, go a yard to love me.

Love and lead me in a way that I yearn for the moment to love on you again.

Love me wholeheartedly. Love me pure. Love me just because I exist.

This is how to love me!!!

M Y H I D I N G P L A C E

ZAKIA LEACH

Oh sweet little secret of mine.

I give you myself in hopes of peace. Bent, broken, bruised and burned.

I run to you for healing.

Bathe me in the silk of silence. Elevate my realm with your energy.

Oh my sweet little hiding place.

Soul soothing sanctuary.

My deepest darkest form of self care.

Detached, unavailable, emotionally unavailable.

I know where to find solace.

Engulf me with the coverage to be me.

Ridiculed and often ashamed.

Gotta blast, my peace is calling.

My Hiding space makes me happy, My Hiding space helps me heal, My Hiding space is just that.

Mines.......

ZAKIA LEACH

S I N C E Y O U A S K E D , I ’ L L T E L L Y O U H O W I F E E L ! ! !

I’m angry, sad, happy, confused, and some more shit! Check on me. I’m not as strong as I look, but at the same time, I’m not as fragile as I appear.

I’m fast as lightning. I’m built to burn. Hell is hot ain't it?

Traumatized from the past and the present, so I couldn’t see my future. Weak, dependent, and overpowered! The end was near. I was crashing out real bad! It’s always a crowd of followers to jump on every train that’s available. I’m no longer that train. Being a crutch or toilet stool for people who have no intention of being better is over!

After careful consideration, I decided to choose me! I make myself happy. I don’t have a need to seek any type of validation from anybody.

Dear Phenomenal Woman

Remember you are beautiful

You are enough You are strong

Resilient and an overcomer.

There’s only one you, so continue to be the best you.

You are loved and appreciated.

Love, Aldena

I love your smile

I love your eyes

Love your giving spirit

You are beautiful.

Love, Tammy

There is Beauty in your brokenness.

You have true love instead of pain. You have joy instead of mourning.

Love, Your Friend *CheryL*

You are Loved

You are appreciated & You are loved way

More than U Know

I love your drive

Keep going!

Having life is a blessing.

Love, Shorty

Dealing with life is another story. From tribe to tribulation, the world just seems like it's spinning.

Giving it to God, taking the necessary steps to achieve your goals.

It’s nothing but a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.

I’ll meet you there, Phenomenally!

Love, LaTanya

Phenomenal, Magical. Fierce. Breath of Love…

Continue on your path, We hold you and receive you

And learn together

Do Not Stop

Love, Perenne

Never stop showing your voice!

Never stop loving yourself

Dear phenomenal woman, You are amazing a Unique gift of light!

Your presence changes the world!

Love CC

You are exactly who God made you to be in your life.

You have Survived Everything thrown at you

And you ' re still standing. Smile, someone loves you!

Have a great day on purpose.

Love, Staci (Shalom).

You were created by God fearfully and wonderfully made. It didn't kill you so you better live. Don’t let shame hold you back because you are loved and cared for.

Your story is going to bless so many lives and that will give God the victory.

You are a miracle and walk in that truth because you are.

Love, Dyanna

You are loved You are enough

You are awesome You are brilliant You are brave

I love you.

You are the best, A real fucking rockstar!

Keep it up baby, Oh and I love you Too too too much!

Love, Kobe

Love Aniyha

You are who you are

You are loving, kind and give more of yourself than you have to.

But because you ' re phenomenal, you are who God has chose to assist his people in endeavors.

You are blessed beyond blessed, for you give even when you don’t have to. You are definitely beautiful, kind and the best that life has to offer.

P.S. Continue being there for those who need you and GOD will always bless you.

Love, Edie

When I look in the mirror, I see you and you are An Amazing phenomenal woman.

Love, Edie

You have struggled with things in your life that only you can change. Continue to wait on something and/or someone. You’ll be waiting. Listen to the spirit of God. Think, move, and activate your moves, stay positive. I know this will last you a lifetime. Be Encouraged!

Love, LaTanya

To that Phenomenal Woman, Remember God don’t give you what you can’t push away, Just remember to ask and by your side he’ll stay.

To that Phenomenal Woman, When you feel like you ’ re hanging on the last string of rope, Remember all can be accomplished with a little faith and hope.

To that Phenomenal Woman, Who gives to her community, Remember how much you bring forth unity.

Love, Natasha (NYC)

I lie in the secret of my skin tone, light brown, dark brown.

From getting my eyebrows done, to putting on fake lashes, to putting on tons of makeup, when the beauty lies from within.

From the sizes of my 2 girls, the roundness of my bootie and the swing in my walk.

I know I'm seen, wink wink, I know the woman in me, phenomenally, phenomenal woman, that’s me!

Love, LaTanya

To learn more about our work and read memoirs and other compilations written by our Authors, visit: www.contextos.org

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Author portraits by Dimitri Hepburn Book design by Kayla Harris and Dimitri Hepburn