7 T HI NGS TO K N O W A primer for considering foster care, adoption and global orphan care
According to the book of James, core to pure religion is “to look after orphans and widows in their distress.� What might that look like for me, today?
Something has sparked in your heart. You wonder what it might look like to open your life to a child that needs the love and protection of family‌or at least to help in some small way. Questions like that are rarely simple. But here are seven key truths for what could become the most remarkable journey of your life.
“See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God!” 1 John 3:1
THE MOTIVATION. We embrace the vulnerable because we have been embraced by God. Throughout Scripture, God calls His people to protect and care for the orphan. But our response isn’t just about obeying a mandate. It’s a mirror, vividly reflecting the character of God and the work of Jesus on our behalf. When God’s people welcome and care for vulnerable children, the Gospel is made visible with purity and clarity. If we’re driven by guilt, duty or idealism alone, we will eventually run dry. But when fed by the gospel of God’s love – for us and others – we are sustained by His power, even when the going is very difficult. “We love because He first loved us” (1 John 4:19).
THE NEED. Children who lack the protection and care of family are the most vulnerable beings on our planet. In the US, more than 400,000 children live in foster care. About a quarter of these children wait for a family to adopt them. The other three quarters require temporary care, with hopes that their biological parents can safely receive them back. Worldwide, an estimated 15 million children have lost both parents. Each situation is unique. But a child outside of family faces harm at dramatically increased rates – from malnutrition to abuse, homelessness to human trafficking. The numbers can be overwhelming: children in orphanages can be 10X more likely to be trafficked than other children and 60-85% of child victims of trafficking in the U.S. come from foster care.
But one statistic matters more than any: it takes just one caring person to change the life of a child forever.
“God sets the lonely in families...� Psalm 68:6
THE FAMILY. Both Scripture and social science strongly affirm that God designed children to grow in families. As study after study reveals, even if a child’s physical needs are met, their body and brain withers without love. But with strong, secure attachment to a caring adult, children thrive. Healthy attachment grows from consistent nurture and a sense of permanency. That is why Scripture describes, “A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in His holy dwelling. God sets the lonely in families.” (Psalms 68:5-6).
THE CHURCH. Government plays a critical role in child protection, but it cannot provide love and belonging. That only happens one caring relationship, one welcoming home at a time. The Church cannot outsource James 1:27. We must fill the central role – both embracing children and supporting the families that embrace children. Foster care and adoption often include great sacrifice and difficulties. It is not a journey to be walked alone. Only together do we have the capacity to sustain this difficult, beautiful calling for the long haul. Certainly, not every believer is called to foster or adopt. But every church is called to embody the pure religion James describes, and each member can play a part. As we do, we grow closer in mutual dependence and show the world God’s heart together!
PRAYER RESPITE FINANCIAL SUPPORT
TRANSPORTATION BABYSITTING CAR MAINTENANCE
HOUSE CLEANING GROCERIES
DONATE SUPPLIES LAWN CARE BRINGING MEALS
ATTEND COURT/APPORTINMENTS WITH THEM
THE OPPORTUNITIES. There are many, many ways we can reflect God’s special love for orphans and vulnerable children. Here are a few: Adoption Adoption makes a child a full, permanent member of your family under the law. This includes public adoption (from the U.S. foster system), private adoption (from biological parents who choose adoption for their child), and international adoption. Foster Care Foster care provides a safe, temporary home for children whose family home is considered unsafe. The first hope is for children to be reunified with their biological family. So foster care often includes praying for and supporting biological parent as well. If the system ultimately finds safe reunification impossible, a child becomes eligible for adoption. Respite Care Respite care means taking a foster family’s child(ren) for a short time to provide time for rest and recovery or other needs. Respite care can span from a single date night to a weekend or longer. Depending on the state and situation, it may require special licensing.
Wrap Around Support Anyone can help adoptive and foster families carry the special physical, emotional and spiritual loads they bear. This can include meals, babysitting, errands…financial support and tangible items like clothing or diapers…and even skilled services like haircuts or orthodontics. Support like this extends much-needed aid and, best of all, tells families you are in it with them. Family Preservation & Reunification When we see children who’ve been hurt by their parents, it’s easy to view those parents as the enemy. But as a people saved by grace, we are called to do all we can to help broken families to heal whenever safely possible. That includes providing aid, encouragement and other support that can enable biological parents to successfully care for their own children. Generosity & Prayer Even when we can do nothing else, we can supporting the work of ministries that serve vulnerable children and families worldwide through prayer and financial gifts. (You can explore trusted CAFO member organizations at cafo.org/members.)
“I want to know Christ, and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings…” Philippians 3:10
THE EXPECTATIONS. Foster youth and orphaned children have experienced the world at its most broken. So if we open our hearts and homes, we will taste some of that pain with them. There may be nothing sweeter on earth than seeing a wounded child slowly restored to health by love and patient nurture. But this road is never easy. The harm caused by abuse, neglect or deprivation can run deep. Healing often comes at much slower speed and greater cost than we’d imagined. That is why we must know from the start: adoption and foster care mirror the gospel story, both in its beauty and its costliness. “For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it.” (Matthew 15:25)
THE NEXT STEPS. Moving from awareness to action can be daunting. Don’t be overwhelmed. Just take one small step. Assess, then take another. Perhaps the first decision is to meet with someone who has fostered or adopted to learn more. It might be signing up for an orientation class or completing that application. Or maybe you know a foster or adoptive family you can start to serve and support today. Share this journey with at least one trusted friend, who can encourage and pray with you – and who’ll support you to follow through. Whatever comes next, root it in prayer. This is not just a physical undertaking; it is spiritual as well. Seek God’s heart most of all. And ask Him to guide each step, ultimately bringing you to the child, family or situation that He’d invite you to embrace. You can be confident that He will.
To dive deeper visit cafo.org/7things
A resource from all the members of:
The Christian Alliance for Orphans equips God’s people for wise, effective adoption, foster care and service to vulnerable children worldwide. cafo.org