Clm #2 2017 by CLM Publishing

ometimes, in business or life in general, one will hear the popular maxim, “the show must go on”. Of course, the show must go on, but with direction. For how can it go on without direction? Some of us do have to work harder to get to the next act or scene, and as much as one may want to keep up with the Joneses, life happens. How then do you encourage yourself through troubling times when it seems everything is going against you? When it seems you’re going against the tide or pushing but not making any headway. Christian Lifestyle magazine recently went through what we would call ‘an impasse’. During that period, we thought of ways to revitalize the magazine while working on ideas to continue to make it current and relevant. And of course while doing this, we had to continue to ensure that the bills were being met. Fortunately, we didn’t stay in that stalemate position for long, but it was a time of observation for us, to see what our impact is in this part of the world. It is said there is a something called ‘counterfactual theory’ that asks “what if ” questions. And you could say we at Lifestyle came up with several what ifs. What if we closed our doors? What if we changed the name from Christian Lifestyle; what will our message be? What if this was the year for us to say “that’s it”; after all, we have been going on nearly nine years now. What if? What if we do this or that? And while most of our ‘what ifs’ were based primarily on fear, and to be honest, financial issues, we felt there wasn’t enough evidence to ‘close our doors’ on what ifs. So, we continued our search. In the search, we were led to the first issue of the magazine, published in July, 2008, and saw thereafter how we have evolved over the years. Truly, we recognized that it is nothing we have done, but that the grace of God has been faithful. To stand strong after all the many publications after our beginning is a milestone that crushed several of our ‘what ifs’. We recognized that we have a responsibility, in spite of what’s going on around us, to present encouraging, inspiring articles that will help others make good decisions in their daily walk. And, if nothing else, that our readers find satisfaction in knowing there is a God that loves them, in spite of the obstacles of life. Thus, while some of our ‘what ifs’ still linger, we were able to delete the ones we can work on today. We know who holds the future and we are sure, even in the midst of all setbacks, holdups and turbulences, we can have a secure future. Welcome to a new chapter in Christian Lifestyle magazine. May you be encouraged today to quell all fear knowing that an awesome God is in charge of your life, and continue therefore to take another step in faith. Karen E. Chin

MANAGING EDITOR Karen E. Chin CONTRIBUTING EDITOR Ravella Melville CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Ewart (Junior) Forde Hyacinth Rose (Pastor) Krystyna Chin Ralph F. Wilson (Dr.) Teneisha Johnson Special contribution FOCUS ON THE FAMILY GIS JENNY WHARTON Kelly Carlson LIFEWAY Mark Dance Philip Yancey Shaunti Feldhahn Sean McDowell Sharon Williams Sissy Goff Tara Sing GRAPHIC PRODUCTION IDEAS SALES DEPARTMENT Email: clmsales7@gmail.com Christian Lifestyle Magazine Building D4, Suite 5, Countryside Shopping Village Savannah, Grand Cayman CAYMAN ISLANDS +(345) 926 2507 or +(345) 946 1737 E: karen.chin@cstylemagazine.com www.cstylemagazine.com To contact the editor If you have questions, wish to comment, or participate, or be a contributor; please contact The Editor, c/o Christian Lifestyle Magazine, Box 1217 KY1-1108 Grand Cayman, CAYMAN ISLANDS BWI. Send email to editor@cstylemagazine.com. Website www.cstylemagazine.com

C o n t e n t s For a happy Marriage: speak with kindness

NEW PROVISION FOR THE FUTURE

HOW DO I STOP SINNING?

COVER STORY

6 8 10

Confronting Your Past to

Live an Abundant Life

Keeping Faith in God

Giving Kids a Moral Compass A Church Without Sight

12-17 Teen Vibez • 10 Ways to Encourage Discussion in Your Small Group • Don’t Grow Up Too Much • Doubting Faith • 6 Ways to Help Your Daughter Quiet Her Inner Critic

Living in a Broken World It’s Just a Thought:

32 34

Who’s the Fairest? CI Cadet Corps’ HQ Officially Open For Business

Three Components to Casting Clear Vision

Bethesda Has a New Director

How to Love Your Church

The Quiet Faith

20 26 30

40 42 43 44

PUZZLE Wordsearch Something To Think About Puzzles Answers

Confronting Your Past to Live an Abundant Life Sharon Williams

ave you ever been asked “How are you doing?” and you say “great” or “just fine”, or “fabulous” but these responses could not be further from the truth? Because the reality is that we are angry/sad/bitter/disappointed/ resentful. Day in and day out, week after week, month after month, year after year and even decade after decade, the same recurring issues come to the forefront of our minds. When we least expect it, the pain comes flooding back – just like a Tsunami. We start getting heart palpitations, we get fidgety and we start getting annoyed all over again as if the issue just happened! And the broken record is played once again and we are exactly where we started – full of rage. We are either unable or unwilling to let go of the past in order to live an abundant life. According to Wikipedia, the definition for Abundant Life is a “life in its abounding fullness of joy and strength for mind, body, and soul. Abundant life signifies a contrast to feelings of lack, emptiness, and dissatisfaction, and such feelings may motivate a person to seek for 4

the meaning of life and a change in their life. The Bible says “The thief (devil) does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I (Jesus) came that they may have life, and have it more abundantly”! (John 10:10). Jesus did not die such a painful death for us to live a mediocre life full of regrets. This constant reply happens because of the power of our minds. Our minds take us to past situations so often that we may say to ourselves “seriously-not again?” The Bible states “For as he thinks in his heart so is he” (Proverbs 23:7). Joyce Meyer in her book “Battlefield of the Mind” says “If you struggle with negative thinking it’s important for you to come to grips with the fact that your life won’t change until your thinking does.” So how do you embrace an abundant life? How does this happen? I believe that we need to let go of the past. Let go of the “could have/should have/would have”. Let go of the hurt that people have caused, whether intentional or not. Let go of what is unjust and unfair treatment at the hands of someone you loved, someone

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you thought loved you, someone you trusted. Perhaps someone you wanted to spend the rest of your life with. The Bible says to “press forward” (Philippians 3:14). Physically and mentally, looking forward and looking back at the same time is completely impossible. Perhaps you need to forgive yourself. That broken record that keeps playing in your mind, titled, “How stupid was I?” This record needs to be symbolically broken once and for all. We make choices and the choices make us. They define us and then we label ourselves and accept these issues as our “lot in life”. Even psychologists would say “Forgiveness – we do it for ourselves to get well and move on”. There are so many benefits to forgiveness. It brings peace, hope, gratitude and joy, just to name a few. We will see and embrace life very differently, from a completely different angle. Same life, same issues but different view point. Do you ever say to yourself “why do I continue to make my past define my future?”

Cont’d on P. 11

Keeping Faith in God Pastor Hyacinth Rose

aven’t we changed! Our families are not the same, our community is not the same, nor is our world the same. We have changed and in our evolution, we have left God out of the equation with devastating results to ourselves. It is now old fashioned to talk about God in any kind of public forum. We are supposed to avoid talk of anything that seems religious since we might offend someone. We are even accused of “bringing God into everything” when we attempt to acknowledge our source of life and provision, in certain settings. Like so many other places in our region, we were once thought of as “God-

fearing”. Now that our modern culture dictates that God is not a necessary part of our lives, we are certainly reaping the reward of our folly. We have become so busy, that the entire spiritual component in terms of belief systems, faith, values, and moral training have been ignored, or else relegated to the church and such agencies. As families, education, sports and other extra-curricular activities have superseded our attention to the spiritual welfare of our families. We used to respect certain days, setting them aside for worship and

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spiritual edification. We would use those opportunities to fellowship with others of like mind and to encourage them in their own walk and family life. Instead of capitalizing on these times, we have bowed to pressure, and allowed those special days to be filled with various activities designed to keep folk out of houses of worship and mostly contribute to the financial support of these planned events! The problem is that there is a spiritual dynamic that, though not always obvious, it comes with God’s blessing which in time will be very evident. Because the precepts and principles for daily living which should dictate our everyday activities are found in God’s written word, little can be gleaned from that most important source if we do not spent time to read and study it. As we obey and put these laws into practice, we begin to reap the benefits of obedience. Simple; God has promised to bless us if we obey his word, and do things His way. As long as we keep on ignoring this fact, we are headed for trouble. The truth, is we keep getting further and further away from what we were intended to be and to

do, and we suppose that by just complaining about it we can change the tide. We have to make genuine effort to work for what worked before! Instead of feeling apologetic for going to church, we should make it an integral part of our family life. Instead of criticizing those who do not understand us, we should let them know that this is our way of life and we have no intention of changing it just so that we can “fit in”. We are going to have to find ways of praying together as families, going to church together, and putting God back into lives, homes and nation if we want to get stabilized. We had better not fool ourselves into believing that we are going to manage by ourselves because of all the new technology and increased ability to think critically and that we don’t really need God’s help! Let us not be embarrassed about putting the spiritual component of our family life back into shape. The health of our community depends on it, so we cannot afford to forget it. And we are going to get nowhere without it.

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Giving Kids a Moral Compass Sean McDowell

very day our kids face any number of moral dilemmas. Should I tell the truth? Should I copy from my friend’s homework, or let him copy from mine? Should I watch this racy DVD? Should I treat a classmate with kindness? Young children probably won’t use the words ‘moral dilemma’ to describe these scenarios, but they do understand that some decisions are harder than others, and that some choices are better than others. As kids get older, they understand the pressure to conform to an immoral culture—a culture with challenges not faced by previous generations. As parents, we want to raise our children to make moral choices that will lead them toward honorable, successful lives. Can we help them build a moral compass that gives them a sense of direction when faced with life’s difficult decisions? Fighter pilots sometimes experience a phenomenon known as vertigo. When this happens, a pilot can become disoriented as to how fast and high he is going. If he relies on his sensations or memory, he may lose control of the aircraft. But one thing will not lie to the pilot—his instruments. His instruments help him determine his orientation and speed so he can safely control the plane. I like using this example with young people because it illustrates two key components of truth and morality: First, when we’re confused about what to do, a standard does exist, something that 8

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helps us recognize up from down, right from wrong. Second, that moral standard is necessarily outside our own feelings and intuition. The very concept of morality means that the standard of truth comes from a higher authority—beyond just the rules or habits of our culture. Put another way, trying to live a moral life on our own is . . . well, impossible. But God never intended anyone to be on his or her own. When we trust in Him, He provides the guidance and support to walk in accordance with His plan. Here are five ways we help our kids journey through life with a constant eye on the “instrument panel” that God provides:

Keep the mission in mind When my son, Scottie, was born, I remember looking at him and searching for any resemblance he might have to his parents. Did he have my nose? My wife’s eyes? As Scottie grew, the answer became clear: He was the image of his father. In fact, looking at photographs of me and my dad, we discovered that Scottie resembled two generations of McDowells. There is something about having a child who looks like me that feels very honoring. So it is with God. He is pleased when we begin to look and act like Him, when we exhibit patience, kindness and love. This is a foundational principle that we need to continually model for our kids, and it’s one they can return to when life’s decisions seem complicated: God wants us to reflect His character. Throughout life, how can we best look and act like Jesus?

Read the manual Not too long ago, I purchased a new Dell laptop with all the bells and whistles. To figure out the intricacies of my computer, do you think I pulled out my old Nintendo manual? No, the best way to figure out how to use my laptop was to consult that computer’s instruction manual. In much the same way, God revealed His instructions through the Bible. If we want our kids to make good choices in life, we need to help them regularly consult the “manual” from the Designer of life. If our kids are unfamiliar with God’s principles, they are more likely to make poor choices. Studying God’s Word gives them the wisdom to discern right from wrong when life’s choices seem unclear.

Connect to power Children have an easy time understanding power, especially how things won’t work without a proper supply. Flashlights require batteries, cars are useless without gas, and dark rooms are illuminated by electric lights. And just as these things need power to function, humans also need a power source (beyond food and water, of course). The Bible tells us that when we trust Jesus Christ with our lives, God’s “power” source—His Holy Spirit—comes to live inside us. The Holy Spirit empowers our faith by convicting us of sin and equipping us with the courage and ability to do what is right. Don’t let your kids forget that they have the strength of the Holy Spirit inside them! As a family, seek God’s wisdom and counsel through prayer, which is our “connection” to this power source. And as you journey through life together, help your kids recognize the Spirit’s prompting and guidance, both when they feel regret for poor decisions and when they sense the conviction and courage to stand for what is right.

don’t affect their behavior very much. They believe they have a sort of “immunity” against negative media influences. But research shows that media do influence the way people think about the world. Consider that American businesses spend billions of dollars every year on advertising. Advertisers understand a simple truth: What we watch and listen to really does affect our decisions. If we’re not actively involved in our kids’ media choices, they can become bombarded by lies that will affect their ability to make good decisions. But we must also help them recognize how media can influence their moral choices. I think an important first step is to show our kids how media incompletely or inaccurately portray consequences for poor choices. This lack of connection between behavior and consequences gradually affects the way young people view certain behaviors in real life. It’s no easy task to raise moral kids. But God offers a plan: to help our kids follow the role model of God’s son, be empowered by the Holy Spirit through prayer, study Scripture and apply it to our lives, surround ourselves with other believers and steer clear of harmful media. By utilizing these tools, we help our kids develop the ability to make wise, moral choices in an immoral society. Sean McDowell is the author and co-author of several books on biblical worldview, including The Unshakable Truth, written with Josh McDowell. Sean leads the Bible department at Capistrano Valley Christian Schools and teaches philosophy, theology and apologetics.

Bring help King David is my favorite person in the Bible. But despite his godly, noble qualities, David committed some egregious sins in his adulterous relationship with Bathsheba and the murder of her husband. I have often wondered where David’s friends were when he made these decisions. Didn’t he have a support system that encouraged him to do right? I believe this question is relevant in our kids’ lives: What kind of friends do they have? Also, do those friends encourage our children to follow God’s leading, or do they steer them away from that path? While there may be nothing wrong with hanging out with non-Christians—God calls us to a mission of love for others—our kids do need the regular support of friends who will not lead them astray. We probably can’t actively select every friend our kids have. But we all make choices that help develop our kids’ different friendships. We can also regularly help our kids recognize the power and influence of supportive relationships, and how their ability to make good choices will be at a great disadvantage without friends who can hold them accountable.

Avoid interference If friends can influence our ability to make good decisions, can media do the same? When I raise this topic with students, they usually tell me that television and movies, music and advertising christian lifestyle >> Issue No. 2 - 2017

A Church Without Sight Mike Leake

t’s Sunday morning and I am rushing around to get the kids and myself ready. As I put in my contacts my eyes are confronted with a terrible pain. It feels as if someone has jabbed my eye with a combination of sandpaper and scissors. As a seasoned contact wearer I know what this means—I’ve got a rip in my contact. “No big deal,” I think to myself, “I’ll just put in another pair.” Wrong! I’m all out of backup contacts. No time to get a new pair. I don’t have backup glasses. I’ve got only one solution—put in one of my wife’s lenses, which are not nearly as strong.

a telephone pole because I swerved to miss a parked car—a car that was a good 30 feet away from me. (Children don’t try this at home. It was in college. Don’t judge me). In the same way, without direction our people will easily slide into fear.

You need to know how bad my eyesight is. I cannot see the Big E. Without my contacts I cannot function normally. So with my wife’s spare contact in my eye ball I stand before the church and read from God’s Word. One side of the congregation is a blurry mess. The other side crystal clear. One side has vision the other nothing.

Usually I fall asleep about ten minutes after I take my contacts out. There isn’t much I can do without vision and so I just give up and fall asleep. I’m convinced the same thing happens in churches. They have no vision, no picture of the future, no idea what is going on, and so they just give up and go to sleep. They disengage. Or they stop coming to church altogether.

My mind immediately goes to the KJV translation of Proverbs 29:18. “Where there is no vision, the people perish.” Though, I’m convinced this verse is radically taken out of context in many leadership talks, I’m not convinced it says nothing about leadership. Because I know what it is like to not be able to see.

Earlier I noted how this verse is often misapplied. I say this because the word here for “vision” is better translated “revelation”. This is why the HCSB translates it as, “Without revelation the people run wild”. The type of vision our people need is not some cockamamie scheme dreamed up by the preacher. The sight our people need is the God-given vision of His Word.

When I cannot see, I have to fill in the blanks and make assumptions. At times this is comical. At other times it is dangerous. Likewise when our people lack clear direction they will fill in the blanks with assumptions. When I cannot see, I’m often afraid of things I should not be. Once in college my buddy thought it would be fun to see how well I could drive without contacts. Though I knew he was right there to grab the wheel it was scary. I almost drove into 10

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When I cannot see, the things which ought to be enjoyable are simply frustrating and confusing. I cannot watch television—I can only listen. I refuse to go in public for fear that I’ll miss someone waving at me or greeting me with a smile, or worse yet, I’ll talk to a mannequin. Likewise, when our people lack clear direction, the things which ought to be enjoyable in church are frustrating and confusing.

Without such a vision—without grasping what God’s Word says for our lives—people will run wild. They’ll be like me without contacts just filling in the gaps of sight with their own fallen assumptions. We need to faithfully communicate God’s Word— God’s vision—to our people so they can see the world with God’s 20/20 vision. And our churches must be structured around this same vision, where everything shines forth God’s glory.

Confronting Your Past to Live an Abundant Life Cont’d from P. 4 God’s word says “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” - Jeremiah 29:11. May I be bold here to suggest a few thoughts? 1. We must acknowledge the past to ourselves. Let’s stop burying these situations. Just because we do not deal with them, doesn’t mean they miraculously disappear. 2. Forgive. Someone may have offended/ hurt/violated you. Even if they are no longer living, you can still forgive. Let it go and let God do for us what we cannot do for ourselves. It is only at this time that the abundant life will be realised. 3. Do we live in condemnation for something that happened to us? Satan is a full-time accuser. Morning, noon and night, 24/7 the devil’s job is to make us feel guilty and discouraged. If we allow him to, he will keep reminding us of our past and make us feel that

we are worthless and not worthy of an abundant life. 4. I heard a pastor once say “Our past issues should be reasons for our purest worship and gratitude to Jesus.” Our realisation of our need for God’s grace should propel us to a deeper and passionate love for Him. Unfortunately the opposite happens. We believe the enemy’s definition of us. The devil will make us feel like Jesus does not hear our prayers or worse yet that Jesus does not care about us. John 8:44 says that Satan is the “father of lies”. He is the granddaddy of all “untruth”. Pastor Gil, who, was a visiting pastor to the Cayman Islands Baptist Church, said, “When I had nothing to do with you, you (Jesus) had something to do with me.” Whether you believe it or not, Jesus is ever present, ever seeing. The “Hound of Heaven” will track us down, wherever we are. The Bible states “can anyone hide himself in secret places, so I shall not see him? Do I not fill heaven and earth?” (Jeremiah 23:24) Not an easy road by any stretch of the

imagination, but so worth it. If you have been attempting to live this life on your own terms and it is not working, may I submit to you to try another way? Ask the Lord Jesus Christ to intervene. As the song writer would say “Jesus take the wheel, take it from my hands, ‘cause I can’t do this on my own, I’m letting go”. May we be bold and ask the Lord, simply, to “help me”. “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened” – Matthew 7:78. Ask and He will make all things new. His Word says “Therefore if any man be in Christ he is a new creature; old things are passed away…” -2 Corinthians 5:17. Letting go and asking for forgiveness is a process rather than a one-time act for many people and does not mean that we no longer remember the hurt, but that we have a different emotional and spiritual perspective on the past. Don’t let your past steal your future.

Happy Father’s Day

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10 ways to

encourage discussion in your small group

teen vibez

How to help your small group come alive

re you part of a small group where no one really says anything? Perhaps it’s the sort of group where every answer is a one word sentence - either “God”, “Jesus”, or “Bible”?

Is there adequate and comfortable seating? Is the room warm – but not too warm zzzzzzz! Are there any distractions? Are you building in the right amount of social time and using it effectively to make connections and build relationships?

It’s not always easy to engage with people and encourage discussion. Here are 10 simple points to help your small group discussions, thanks to Graham Knox from http://insight.typepad.co.uk

. BREAK THE ICE 2 One of the best icebreakers I know is food! Providing

. A POSITIVE ENVIRONMENT 1 Try to provide a comfortable and casual atmosphere. 12

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and sharing snacks before your study time is a simple and natural way to break the ice with young people. Or, what about a meal or a barbeque? Simple icebreakers and games can also get things

moving and encourage interaction. They can help provide positive momentum for small group study and discussion by,

. BE AFFIRMING 8 Acknowledge all contributions. Avoid any put-downs.

* Helping new members to integrate into a group. * Helping young people feel comfortable together. * Encouraging cooperation. * Encouraging listening to others. * Creating a good atmosphere for learning and participation.

. THE SOUND OF SILENCE 9 Don’t be afraid of silence. Young people need time to

Use icebreakers which encourage everyone in the group to talk or share non-threatening information about themselves. . IT’S OK TO TALK! 3 Perhaps an obvious point, but clearly explain that

your study time is meant to be a discussion. Some young people need ‘permission’ to talk! Encourage every group member to participate.

. USE OPEN ENDED QUESTIONS

Use open ended questions and non-threatening questions. To find out how to do this check out the Insight article ‘That’s a good question’. Are you designing questions which avoid simple ‘yes’ and ‘no’ answers? The best questions allow young people to express their own ideas, views and opinions. Help them to discover and apply what the Bible says for themselves.

Affirm young people for what they are saying. Allow young people the right to pass and not share.

think about the question and phrase their answer in their own mind first, before expressing their thoughts out loud and in public. . SUMMARIZE 10 From time to time summarize what the group has said about the question or bible passage. Clarify and add any teaching points. This helps to draw various ideas together, gives continuity to the study and keeps the discussion on track.

What would you add to this list? What have you found to be effective in your group to promote discussion and personal involvement? These are some of the ways to encourage discussion in your small group. Sourced from the Internet

. LISTEN 5 Avoid answering your own questions! If necessary,

rephrase them until they are clearly understood. An eager group quickly becomes passive and silent if they think you will do most of the talking. Don’t expect every answer to be addressed to you. As the group becomes more at ease, they will broaden their interaction with each other. This is a sign of a healthy discussion. . BE INCLUSIVE 6 Include everyone in the discussion whenever

possible. Don’t allow one person to monopolize the conversation. Don’t be content with just one answer. Ask what others in the group think, until several people have had an opportunity to give answers to the question. . BE CREATIVE 7 Instead of starting with a question use a role play or case study to bring about a response. Use a group survey to provide a platform for further discussion.

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Don’t grow up too much teen vibez

Why Jesus wants us to remain childlike How would you answer the question, “Who is the greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven?” When you first think about it, you might say someone who is... • Deeply religious • Highly disciplined • A serious Bible scholar • A famous pastor or teacher In other words, we often think the greatest person in the Kingdom of Heaven would probably be a wise old man. But let’s see what Jesus said when he was asked this same question... At that time the disciples came to Jesus and asked, “Who, then, is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?” He called a little child to him, and placed the child among them. And he said: “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever takes the lowly position of this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. (Matthew 18:14 NIV)

Childlike faith What is it about little children that Jesus is trying to say we should be like in this passage of the Bible? I don’t think he was saying we should be immature or silly like kids can be. But here’s a couple of things he might have been suggesting: • Children depend entirely on their parents • Children accept and believe things quickly • Children know they need the help of other people • Children live in the moment and enjoy what they have • Children trust those who care for them So what could that mean for you and me in our relationship with Jesus?

Growing up with God When we grow up, we are often told that the goal is to become independent. We are trained to leave our parents, get a job, make a living and stop depending on other people for what we need. However, our relationship with God is quite different. • Growing up with God means we depend more on him every day • Growing up with God means we learn to accept what

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He says quickly and without questioning • Growing up with God means we admit we can’t do things on our own • Growing up with God means we learn to be thankful for what he has given us, and enjoy each day he provides • Growing up with God means we trust Him, because we know he cares for us. So don’t grow up too quickly. Don’t give in to thinking the goal of life is to become independent. Just like a child depends on their parents for everything they need, we need to remember that we depend on God for everything too.

Doubting Faith

What do I do if my friend is falling away from Christianity?

JENNY WHARTON

he problem at hand is keeping either a fellow brother or sister in Christ from not walking away from a saving faith in Jesus. There are many circumstances that surround this situation and many variables that determine how best to handle it. This article will focus on how to deal with the situation of a friend who has told you that they doubt their Christian faith. Before I get into some helpful insights into how to deal with this, know that this person’s doubt has the potential to knock about your own faith, particularly if they are someone who you respect or who has impacted your own Christian faith.

Don’t panic, thank them for their trust A common gut reaction is to panic, but try your best not to. Instead appreciate the great level of trust they must have for you. Let this appreciation lead you into thanking them for their honesty. Thanking them for sharing their struggles will go a long way and will help you create a safe space where they can explain how they got to this point. Many who struggle

with their faith do not have the courage to confide in others. Too many people slowly disengage from the church family and then disappear without anyone really being aware of their struggles. Keeping a calm state of mind is important because it is likely that they are asking for your help.

It is your job to love, encourage, listen & pray

• Love

After trying your best not to panic, guard yourself by keeping in mind that doubt is a normal part of the Christian life. The Christian life is full of trials and calls for faithful endurance. Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. James 1:2-4 With this in mind, do not condemn them as a non-believer, or judge them for their lack of faith. Get used to the fact that doubt will come either to you or your friends on a regular basis. Be prepared to love them by being by their side for as long

as it takes. Do not be tempted to abandon them.

• Encourage

Many who struggle with doubt can begin thinking that their doubt is just unbelief. Know that their doubt will eventually begin manifesting itself into action, as they slowly transition from living as a Christian to living as an unbeliever. We are to continually encourage them to live their lives as a Christian, even if they don’t feel like one anymore. Remind them that their faith journey is a race of endurance and they are not alone. Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and the sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us. Hebrews 12:1

• Listen

The majority of Christians normally go through times of doubt because they are sincerely thinking about their faith and are carefully examining it. Listening to them can therefore offer you some great insight to what exactly it is that is causing

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Cont’d on P. 19 |

6 Ways

to Help Your Daughter Quiet Her Inner Critic teen vibez

By Sissy Goff

And as they grow older, it often gets worse. They put more and more pressure on themselves—academically, athletically, artistically, even sometimes spiritually.

You guessed it. Herself.

They are highly aware of how others view them and even more aware of how they fail in meeting their own unrealistic expectations.

f there is one thing I’ve learned about girls in the 21 years I’ve been counseling them, it’s how profoundly hard they are on themselves.

An abundance of research basically says the same thing. It’s something you already know. When something goes wrong in a boy’s world, whom does he blame? Someone else (Moms, I’m afraid that someone is you more often than not). When something goes wrong in a girl’s world, whom does she blame? All girls are critical of themselves. Some girls show it. Others become adept at being critical of others or looking like it doesn’t matter. But I can tell you from thousands of conversations with girls of all ages—it matters to them all. The Problem of “Playground Politics” and Perfectionism Many of these self-critical girls become perfectionistic. Some parents notice the trend begin in middle school when girls start to track their own failures. Others begin in elementary school when social hierarchy comes into play—or, as one girl referred to it in my office, “playground politics.” Other parents will tell me that their daughters were grunting to get things right before they even had words and furious with themselves before they understood what anger was. These girls are perfectionistic. 16

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They are obsessively watching the rise and fall of their own particular rating systems, whether it’s grades, stats in sports or likely more often the “likes” (or lack of them) on their Instagram photos.

You may know this girl: • She cries or gets angry anytime you try to correct her. •

She pushes herself entirely too hard.

•

You have to remind her that grades don’t matter to you as much as she seems to think they do.

• She hangs back from trying things she might not do well. •

Her room might be compulsively clean, or it might be a wreck because she’s spending so much energy trying to control all of the other areas of her life.

•

She gets great responses from teachers on her behavior, but is a terror when she comes home from trying to perform all day long.

•

She carries anxiety almost everywhere she goes

•

Basically, she’s exhausted.

She is trying so hard and just cannot keep up with the excessive requirements she is putting on her own life. What can you do when this is your daughter? How do you help her rest? How do you teach her grace? Accept her own failure? Receive your constructive feedback? Perfectionism often gets worse over time. But I believe there is a great deal you can do as a parent to alleviate some of this powerful pressure.

. Check your own perfectionism. What kind of pressure are you putting on yourself? On your performance? On the way you look? What kind of comments is she hearing you make about yourself?

A high school girl recently said to me that her mother talked about her own weight all of the time.

“My mom is skinnier than I am. All I can think when she says that is, if she feels that way about herself, what must she think about me?”

. Emphasize doing your best rather than doing it right. Ask her how she felt about a particular ball game or report card. Does she feel like she did her best? If she is a perfectionist, she’ll likely be much harder on herself than you could ever be on her. This is when you step in with support rather than criticism.

enjoy one another. Make sure to spend time that is not centered around some type of teaching or lesson. Every child needs to be enjoyed just for the sake of enjoyment. When you enjoy your child, she believes she is more enjoyable as a person. At our summer camp several years ago, Melissa Trevathan, our director and my friend, said two sentences I will never forget. She was talking about Jesus and said, “He doesn’t ask us to try harder. He just makes us new.” I’ll never forget those words because I’m a bit of a—actually a huge—perfectionist myself. And I’m desperate to be made new. His mercies are new every morning. Those mercies are around and inside of me because of the Lord’s great love. His compassions never fail. For me. For your perfectionistic daughter. For you. Help your daughter learn what it means to rest in the kind of love that Lamentations 3 is talking about. Learn to rest in yourself. As you do, you will free your child to do the same. And as she does, she will gradually learn to stop basing her worth on her performance or her friends’ ratings and base it on the great love that our gracious Father has for her—and for you. Sissy Goff is the director of child and adolescent counseling at Daystar Counseling Ministries in Nashville, Tennessee, as well as the author of six books, including Raising Girls and Intentional Parenting. For more parenting help, check out RaisingBoysAndGirls.com.

3 4

. Give little ones a reward for trying. Don’t just reward their successes but their attempts as well. Celebrate an attempted goal rather than an accomplished one. . Acknowledge her strengths and her struggles. We often don’t bring those struggles up so they don’t feel bad about themselves. They know where they struggle. To say to her, “I know you’re not the best basketball player on the team, but you sure are amazing with your little brother,” or “I could never draw the way you do” helps her know that you see her realistically and that she is more than just her struggles.

. Fail in front of her often. Drop things in front of her. Mess up a project. Talk about when you fail. Share a story of something foolish you did at work. Tell her when you’ve hurt a friend’s feelings.

You are your daughter’s hero. She needs to know that failure is a part of everyone’s life. It will help her to forgive herself. Emphasize the fact that we only realize we need Jesus to the degree we know what a sinner, mess or failure we are. Help her develop her own awareness of her need for grace.

. Learn to laugh at yourself. Is laughter a regular sound in your home? It is important for everyone to learn to laugh at themselves and simply christian lifestyle >> Issue No. 2 - 2017

Bethesda Has a New Director A

pril Lewis was recently appointed by the Regional Council as the Director of the Bethesda Counselling Centre, following on from Rev. Yvette Noble Bloomfield and, for an interim period, Rev. Dave Hazle. Ms. Lewis is a licensed counselor and has been counselling here in the Cayman Islands for the past 20 years. She has a Bachelor’s degree in Criminal Justice and obtained her Master’s degree in counselling at Oral Roberts University in Tulsa, Oklahoma. She returned to Cayman to work for the government at the Cayman Islands Counselling Center, and then as the Director for the Employee Assistance Program. For the past ten years Ms. Lewis has served as the leader for the Counselling ministry at her church. She says her life’s goal took a turn after a physical accident which became her impetus to counsel. Because of the accident, establishing a therapeutic alliance together with empathizing has become one of her greatest assets in helping people. Ms. Lewis is eclectic and diverse in her counselling having provided counselling to those from various cultural backgrounds and religious beliefs, as well as non-religious. She has provided counselling for all types of issues, such as marital, family, depression, grief, and financial issues. For Ms. Lewis, the only difference really in Christian counselling is the counselor. There is no prejudice, or discrimination. Each client is treated with the utmost care and confidentiality. She says confidentiality and good ethics is one of the most important elements of good counselling and believes in providing complete confidentiality and privacy. “It is my great desire to help hurting people and fulfill my calling - the call of God upon my life. I believe counselling is necessary and is just as important as medical assistance. We all deal with life’s issues that sometimes require help from a professional”, she says. Bethesda provides face to face and online counselling. Counselling is provided for individual and group therapy/counselling for all types of issues such as marital, family, depression, stress and workplacerelated issues that affect work productivity, among many other issues. Bethesda Counselling Center is a mission of the Council to provide professional and preventive counselling/therapeutic intervention. Ms. Lewis says, “I have seen many healed and delivered from life’s hurts and issues through the years

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I have counselled, and am grateful to be a part of this wonderful healing process”. Ms. Lewis has also served as the Cayman representative for international ministries such as the president of Aglow Cayman, coordinator for World Day of Prayer for Jerusalem and director of the Cayman Healing Rooms. She is currently an ordained and licensed minister through the International Association of Healing Rooms. Other than helping people which she loves to do, she enjoys spending time with family and friends. She also loves to swim and play tennis and golf. To contact Bethesda, phone 946-6575 or email bethesda@candw.ky. www.bethesdacounselling.ky.

Doubting Faith... Cont’d from P. 15 their doubt. I know and understand how tempting it is to jump in and interrupt them with great words of wisdom, however let them do most of the talking first and then ask for an invitation to reply.

• Pray

Know that doubt can sometimes not be over quickly. Be patient and be prepared and dedicated to pray for as long as it takes.

authority and has power to save and transform lives. For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek. Romans 1:1 I wish to end with this encouragement and also warning from Hebrews 3:13. But exhort one another every day, as long as it is called “today,” that none of you may

be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin. This is a call to continue to strengthen our relationship with God and to encourage our fellow brothers and sisters to do the same. We are specifically called to not allow the unbelief of a hardened, sinful heart to be the cause of one to fall away from their faith. We are to do our upmost to strengthen each other’s faith through mutual encouragement and we are to be dedicated to this cause until Christ returns.

It is not your job to rescue or convince Doing the above is taking on the responsibility to bear this burden with them. Beware of taking on the responsibility of bearing this burden for them. Do not be fooled into thinking that it is up to you to rescue them and save their faith. If you place this burden completely on your shoulders and your friend does lose their faith, you will naturally feel great loss, but you will also feel unnecessary guilt. You will go back over and over again in your mind, that there might have been something more you could have said or there was something more you could have done. However, unless you deliberately caused them to fall away, you are nowhere near to blame. Being a Christian is first and foremost about having a personal relationship with God. That relationship is then played out in the Christian community. And that’s where you come in. Despite the fact that you must prepare mindfully and carefully for what may arise in conversation from now on, it is not your job to convince them with the perfect answers. Sometimes it is not even your own answer that will convince them. Asking them the simple question: ‘What do you still believe in?’ can uncover such powerful truths and realities for them. Furthermore rely less on your own words and rely primarily on God’s Word. They may not wish to read the Bible, but constantly encourage them to seek out answers from God’s Word. By graciously asking if they would like to read the Bible with you, you are reinforcing where they should be seeking the answers to their doubts. The Bible speaks the truth with christian lifestyle >> Issue No. 2 - 2017

How to love your church (Even when you don’t like it)

Do you love your church? I’m not asking if you love the stained-glass windows, feel fuzzy about the altar or can’t keep your eyes off the new auditorium. I’m not even asking if you feel fondly towards the people you worship with! Loving your church is about so much more than that stated above, or how you feel each Sunday. It’s a conscious decision we make to be present, to encourage those around us and to pray for our ministers, because we are all members of the body of Christ. I’m asking whether you love your church… practically. Love, after all, is not just a feeling.

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Sometimes, going to church can be hard. People let us down, we don’t like the style of worship or we feel like we aren’t being fed by the sermons. In times like this, it can be tempting to feel like we don’t really love church, and maybe we’d be better off going elsewhere, or not going at all. So here are five ways to love you church, even when you aren’t really liking it.

Get there early Getting to church on time is good - you don’t miss any of the singing or teaching, you don’t disrupt anyone when you’re finding your seat and you don’t miss out on any important announcements! But getting to church early is even better. When you arrive early, you’re showing those around you that you care about

them, because you’re there to speak to people before church begins. When you arrive early, you’ll have the opportunity to talk to newcomers, encourage old friends and maybe even make plans to meet up with others after the service or during the week. Arriving early may be a sacrifice but it’s one that will make a big difference.

Leave late At the other end of the service, don’t rush off straight away. Instead, stick around for morning tea or supper or just a chat, and enjoy fellowship with your brothers and sisters in Christ. Ask them how they’re going, what you can pray for, what they found encouraging or challenging about the sermon or what they’ve read in the Bible that week. Invest time in others instead of rushing back to your home.

Get involved Are you serving at church? Once you’re

involved in the way something runs, it’s a lot harder to be critical or judgmental of those who put on the service each week. It’s also just really generous and godly to give up your time and energy to serve. Sign up to a roster, and get involved. Does your church need to be set up before the service? Packed away afterwards? Coffee cups washed up? Cars directed to parking spots? These jobs are not glamorous, but you will show real love to those around you when you do them.

Pay attention Sometimes church might feel boring or the sermon might be hard to follow. But if someone on the pulpit or altar looks out and sees half the congregation playing on their phones, how are they going to feel? Unless you’re using the bible app on your phone, put the phone away and pay attention to what’s going on. Make eye contact with the person/

preacher/speaker; nod and smile if appropriate, to encourage them in their ministry to you. You might even like to take notes to help yourself pay attention.

Pray for those in leadership Even if you’re finding the sermons at your church hard to understand or dull, pray for your minister! Even if the band is consistently out of tune, pray for them! Even if the coffee is always cold, pray for those providing food. Don’t pray that God would fix the problems you perceive, but pray in thanks for providing these people; pray that you would all continue to encourage and strengthen one another, and pray that God would help you to love them the way He loves you. Liking your church can be a challenge, but no matter what’s going on, you can always love your church. Sourced from the Internet

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cover story

New for th

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Provisions he Future Dr. Ralph F. Wilson

(Luke 22:35-38) Pt. 1 Text Luke 22:35-38 [35] Then Jesus asked them, “When I sent you without purse, bag or sandals, did you lack anything?” “Nothing,” they answered. [36] He said to them, “But now if you have a purse, take it, and also a bag; and if you don’t have a sword, sell your cloak and buy one. [37] It is written: ‘And he was numbered with the transgressors’; and I tell you that this must be fulfilled in me. Yes, what is written about me is reaching its fulfillment.” [38] The disciples said, “See, Lord, here are two swords.” “That is enough,” he replied.

Exposition Jesus continues his teaching at the Last Supper. The previous week’s lesson on Jesus’ prediction of Peter’s denial and Jesus’ warning that Satan would shake and buffet them (22:30-34), goes hand in hand with this week’s lesson. Jesus is saying: Up until now, things have gone well, but a dramatic change is coming. Satan will attack you and stir up enemies against you. Whereas

people were hospitable to you on your earlier mission journeys, now they will be hostile and inhospitable. Be ready. Be prepared.

No Lack (22:35) Jesus recalls to their mind easier, happier days. “Then Jesus asked them, ‘When I sent you without purse, bag or sandals, did you lack anything?’ ‘Nothing,’ they answered.” (22:35) His command back then was to travel light and trust God to supply their needs through friends of the Kingdom who would welcome them into their homes. And if some towns rejected them, never mind, they would go onto the next town (Luke 10:1-9). The lesson they needed then was dependence upon the Father to meet their every need. And they had learned that God could and would meet their needs abundantly. “Did you lack anything?” Jesus asks. “Nothing” is their reply.

Why can’t it be like it used to be? We may never know fully in this life. But we can know for sure that the Teacher is teaching us new lessons. Our discipleship training is still underway. The lessons in times of hardship are more difficult than those of easy times, but no less important.

Now Equip Yourselves for Your Mission (22:36) Jesus’ lesson for his disciples now is: Expect hardship and hostility. This time when you embark on your journey, go prepared so that your mission is selfsufficient. “He said to them, ‘But now if you have a purse, take it, and also a bag; and if you don’t have a sword, sell your cloak and buy one.’ “ (22:36) Let’s examine some of the nouns Jesus uses:

But times are changing. Now there is a different lesson. There are new marching orders.

“Purse” is Greek ballantion, “moneybag, purse.”[1] “Bag” (NIV) or “scrip” (KJV) is Greek pera, “a leather pouch used by travelers, ‘knapsack, traveler’s bag.’ “[2] Where once they traveled without luggage and traveler’s checks, now they will need both.

How we hate change. How we long for the good old days. We look back with fond memories and contrast them with the bleak days we are facing now. Why is this? What did I do to deserve this?

There is a time to go with nothing and there is a time to go prepared for all contingencies. Are you ready to go now with no preparation? Good. Are you ready to set aside time and precious

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resources to assemble what you need? Good. Now you are a disciple that is flexible in the Master’s hands. Now you are free to obey rather than tied to your fears.

Buy a Sword (22:36b) The hard part of this passage to understand is Jesus’ directive to purchase a sword. The noun “sword” is Greek machaira, “a relatively short sword or other sharp instrument, ‘sword, dagger.’ “[3] This isn’t a soldier’s long sword, but a small sword, the handgun of the ancient world. The problem we have is that elsewhere Jesus decries violence. Does he mean this literally or figuratively? We’ll examine that in a moment. First, let’s see what he does say: “If you don’t have a sword, sell your cloak and buy one.” (22:36b) “Cloak” (NIV) or “garment” (KJV) translates the Greek noun himation, “outer garment,”[4] a garment of prime importance to travelers to keep them from the chill of the night. Notice how emphatic this clause is. Marshall says: “A garment for wear at night was an utter necessity; to give it up for a sword implies that dire circumstances are at hand... The saying is a call to be ready for hardship and self-sacrifice.”[5]

warfare and violence. Jesus recognizes that he is introducing a faith that will arouse intense antagonism. “Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword” (Matthew 10:34). When Peter draws his sword and cuts of an ear in his zeal to prevent Jesus’ imminent arrest in the Garden of Gethsemane, Jesus responds, “Put your sword back in its place, for all who draw the sword will die by the sword” (Matthew 26:51-52). He may have been trying to protect Peter from immediate death, since Judas was accompanied by the armed temple guard against which one or two swords would have been no match. If Peter hadn’t sheathed his sword immediately, he probably would have been struck down by the soldiers. But Jesus seems to be laying down a general truth -- violent men can expect to die violent deaths. Luke’s account includes the disciples’ question in the Garden: “’Lord, should we strike with our swords?’ And one of them struck the servant of the high priest, cutting off his right ear. But Jesus answered, ‘No more of this!’ And he touched the man’s ear

Why, then, is a sword of more importance than keeping warm at night? We have two choices: 1. Jesus means for his disciples literally to carry a sword on their journeys for protection. 2. Jesus is speaking figuratively and doesn’t really mean for his disciples to be armed on their journeys.

Did Jesus Really Mean for Them to Buy a Sword? Let me argue both sides; then you decide. On the one hand, it wasn’t uncommon for travelers to carry a short sword to protect themselves against bandits and thieves who preyed on them in the lonely stretches of road. Jesus may be anticipating the time when the disciples would travel hundreds of miles beyond Jerusalem, as tradition tells us they did. To carry a small sword doesn’t make them violent or evil men, just men prepared for any contingency. For decades I have enjoyed J.R.R. Tolkein’s Lord of the Rings. Frodo carries the heavy burden of destroying the Ring and keeping it from the enemy in the dark Land of Mordor. So Frodo and his Hobbit companions -- Sam, Pippin, and Meriodoc -- set out on their journey. In the Shire they have no need of weapons, but when they prepare to leave the Shire they equip themselves with swords. They are not warlike. They come on a peaceful mission, but they refuse to be deterred by their enemies. They are equipped to defend themselves if necessary so that they might complete their vital mission. On the other hand, Jesus seems critical of violence and using weapons. The sword is generally used in the Bible to indicate 24

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and healed him” (Luke 22:49-51). Jesus’ whole mission is about healing and giving life, not death. John’s account includes a word to Peter who has been unable to accept Jesus’ suffering and death (Mark 8:33). Peter’s swordplay is having the effect of frustrating Jesus’ mission to redeem mankind by his death: “Put your sword away! Shall I not drink the cup the Father has given me?” (John 18:11). Many commentators see Jesus’ command to obtain a sword as figurative rather than literal. Schlatter says, “Jesus was not speaking of increasing their weapons. But just because He was not thinking of their weapons, the disciples needed the courage which regards a sword as more necessary than a cloak, and which will surrender its last possession but cannot give up the fight.”[6] Marshall sees it as “a call to be ready for hardship and self-

Cont’d on P. 41

Living in a Broken World Pt. 1 of 2 Philip Yancey

As [the year] drew to a close, I accepted perhaps the hardest assignment of all, not in terms of quantity of suffering — can it ever be quantified? — but in the sheer intensity of horror and intimate grief. The weekend after Christmas I addressed the community of Newtown, Connecticut, a town reeling from the senseless slaughter of 20 first-graders and six of their teachers and staff members. That weekend I heard firsthand accounts of the tragedy from affected families and also counselors, first responders and staff from Sandy Hook Elementary School. Among the adults I talked to, I sensed no spirit of revenge, rather bewilderment and deep sadness. No one had a clue to the “why us?” questions. The surviving children were coping in different ways. Anger flared in some. Others showed signs of panic attacks and anxiety, fearful of going back to school. What happened at Sandy Hook was a parent’s darkest nightmare. By God’s grace, most children will never experience that particular kind of tragedy. But everyone, in varying ways and degrees, suffers pain. In two decades of writing, I have interviewed many people in pain. All of them, without exception, experienced deep and nagging doubts about God because of their suffering. Pain calls our most basic beliefs about God into question. Listening to those who have suffered, I hear four basic questions expressed in varying words: · Is God competent? · Is God really so powerful? · Is God fair? · Why doesn’t God seem to care about pain?

Whenever pain touches the lives of our children, they may ask one or more of these questions. Helping them find meaningful answers can deepen their trust in a God who is beyond our understanding. 26

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Is God competent? I confess that I once viewed pain as God’s one great goof in an otherwise impressive world. Why mess up such a world by including pain in it? My doubts about God’s competence were shaken in a most unusual place. To my amazement, I learned that a world without pain actually exists, within the walls of a leprosy hospital. As I walked the corridors of a leprosarium in Louisiana and got to know victims of the disease, my doubts about the value of pain faded away. People with leprosy do not feel physical pain — that, in fact, is the peculiar tragedy of their disease. As the disease spreads, nerve endings that carry pain signals fall silent. I met a leprosy patient who had lost all the toes on his right foot simply because he insisted on wearing tight and narrow shoes. I know another who nearly lost his thumb because of a sore that developed when he gripped a mop handle too firmly. I learned that in a thousand ways large and small, pain serves us each day. If we are healthy, pain cells alert us when to change shoes, when to loosen our grip on a mop handle. I came away with a bedrock conviction that pain is essential to normal life on this planet. It is not an innovation God devised at the last moment of Creation to keep us mortals humble. Nor is it God’s one great goof.

Is God powerful? Of course, physical pain is only the top layer of what we call suffering. Death, disease, earthquakes, tornadoes — all of these summon up harder questions about God’s involvement on earth. Is God powerful enough to rearrange the universe in a way that would relieve our suffering? Job is an Old Testament book about a man who suffered severe and undeserved anguish. In His conversation with Job (chapters 38-41), God had a perfect opportunity to discuss divine lack of power, if that indeed was the problem. Instead, God asserted

His wisdom and power. Other parts of the Bible convince me that perhaps we ought to view the problem of pain as a matter of timing, not of power. We get many clues that God, like us, is unsatisfied with the state of this world, a creation marred by an evil antagonist. God feels grief and anger over the violence, the warfare, the hatred, the suffering; and God plans to do something about it someday. Throughout the writings of the prophets, Jesus’ teachings and the entire New Testament runs a theme of hope, of a great day when a new heaven and new earth will replace the old. “I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us,” said the apostle Paul (Romans 8:18). Like Job, we are called to trust God even when all the evidence seems stacked against trust. God plans a much better world someday, one without pain or evil or tears or death, and asks for our faith in the promise of that new creation.

Is God fair? “Why me?” we ask almost instinctively when we face great tragedy. If, in fact, God is all-competent and all-powerful, doesn’t that imply God controls every detail of life? Few of us can avoid such thoughts when suffering strikes. Immediately we begin to search our conscience for some sin that God must be punishing: What is God trying to tell me through my pain? And if we find nothing definite, we begin to question God’s fairness.

Once again, the only reliable place to test out our doubts about God is the Bible. What do we find there — does God ever use pain as punishment? Yes, as a matter of fact. The Bible records many examples, especially punishment directed against the Old Testament nation of Israel. But in every case, punishment follows repeated warnings against the behavior that merits the punishment. Does that pattern resemble what happens to most of us today? If not, I have to question whether the pains most of us feel are punishments from God. Frankly, I believe that unless God specially reveals otherwise, we would do best to look to other biblical examples of suffering people. Once again, Job provides the best example. Job’s friends insisted the problem was with Job, not God. But God insisted that Job had done nothing at all to deserve his pain, and it was not a punishment for his behavior. At two different places in the New Testament, Jesus made the same point. Once, His disciples pointed to a blind man and asked who had sinned to bring on such suffering — the blind man or his parents. Jesus replied that neither one had sinned (John 9:1-3). Another time, Jesus commented on two current events from His day: the collapse of a tower that killed 18 people and a government massacre of some worshipers in the temple. Those people, said Jesus, were no guiltier than anyone else (Luke 13:1-5). They, too, had done nothing to deserve their suffering. Join us in the next issue for the conclusion.

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christian lifestyle >> Issue No. 2 - 2017

For a Happy Marriage: Speak With Kindness — Especially When You Want to “Tell It Like It Is”

By Shaunti Feldhahn

was standing with my family in a packed line for an amusement park ride when the couple in front of me began looking at their watches and arguing. “Oh, great.” The wife’s voice could be clearly heard above the noisy environment. “It’s almost 2 pm already. At this rate we’re going to miss the show with the kids.” Her husband shook his head. “Well, that sort of thing happens.” “Well, it wouldn’t have happened at all if you’d gotten the show tickets when we first got to the park. But no,

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you had to spend all that extra time looking at the map, even though the kids asked you to hurry. If we miss the show, they’re going to be really upset with you.” Just as I couldn’t help overhearing, I couldn’t help wincing — not just at the woman’s words, but at her piercing and sarcastic tone of voice. I found myself thinking, Would you ever use that tone of voice with a close friend? If not, then why on earth would you ever speak that way to your husband? Years later when I finished a major research study to identify what makes the happiest couples so happy, I learned that my initial concern at the amusement part wasn’t just a rhetorical question. It turns out that how we speak to each other day to day is one of the most

important factors in marriage. The problem is, how we speak is also one of those things we simply don’t think about — or feel we shouldn’t have to think about. We figure that after years of marriage, we should be able to drop our guard and not have to watch every word. That’s a great point in many ways, but all too often we take it too far. Perhaps without realizing it, we take intimacy for license. So what does that look like? Well, for example, “telling it like it is” is highly valued in our culture today. As is “brutal honesty.” As one man earnestly told me, “In marriage, you have to be able to be brutally honest with each other.” I hear that sort of thing a lot. But I have never heard those words from the happiest couples. Instead, for them, speaking kindly has become a way of life. As one husband put it, “Yes, you need to be honest. You need to share the real deal. But those times are also when you need to be the most careful. You’ve got to be sure that you’re speaking in a way that doesn’t hurt the feelings of the person you love most.” The old adage is true: So often what matters most is not what you say, but how you say it. In fact, I’ve discovered that one of the key factors that can change a marriage from tough to terrific is a purposeful effort to speak with kindness in all the day-to-day bustle of marriage. So whether you are sitting down to discuss a life-changing issue or simply trying to hurry your slow-moving spouse out the door, ask yourself: How can I speak with kindness right now?

For a Happy Marriage: Do the “Little Things” That Matter to Your Spouse As I looked at the sea of raised hands in the massive auditorium, I couldn’t help but chuckle. It was a Sunday morning service, and as part of his sermon series on relationships, the pastor of this large church had asked me to do a pastoral interview on my research findings about happy couples. He had just turned to the women in the congregation and asked whether a particular little action would be meaningful to them. A thousand hands went up, and we could clearly hear the accompanying sounds of shock from a thousand men. Then it was the men’s turn, and the women were the ones taken aback when they learned what was important to the men — including, in most cases, the ones sitting right next to them.

So what were the little actions that were so important to these men and women but were so hidden to the opposite sex? Understanding the answer could be one of the most important and simplest keys to having a happy, thriving marriage. It turns out that these actions almost always tell the opposite sex: “I care about you.” And once your spouse truly believes that you care, you’ve created a protective cocoon around your marriage that makes it difficult for other issues to hurt the two of you. Here are a few of the “little things” that matter in marriage:

Ladies: Be sure to notice the little day-to-day things your husband does, and say “thank you.” As the results of my survey began rolling in, I was shocked to see that, for a man, hearing “thank you” has the same emotional impact on him as hearing “I love you” does for a woman. Consider saying “Thank you for changing out those light bulbs, honey,” “Thank you for trimming all the bushes even though it was hot outside,” or “Thank you for taking the kids to the park this morning; you’re such a good dad.” Sincerely say “thank you” several times a day and you’ll be shocked at the difference it makes in your marriage. Even better, say some of those praiseworthy things in front of others — “You know what he did this morning? He took the kids to the park and let me sleep in”.

Gentlemen: Hold your wife’s hand when you are walking across a parking lot, or put your arm around her when you are sitting together at church. Regardless of what her “love language” might be, those gestures speak because they convey an important message: “You’re mine, and I would choose you all over again.” Another key action to practice with your wife: Convey that same message of reassurance when the two of you are at odds. Saying “I’m really angry and I need some space, but I want you to know that we’re OK” is a priceless reassurance that matters to nearly every woman. These little actions may seem trivial, so it would be easy to discount them. Don’t. They are powerful. They can actually begin to transform a relationship even if only one person is doing them. Give them a try in your marriage and you’ll soon find that these actions really weren’t that “little” after all.

christian lifestyle >> Issue No. 2 - 2017

The Quiet Faith T

he way we process things in the Church these days is very disconcerting. I noticed recently that there are serious buzz words that get congregations all over, very excited. Generally, these statements involve familiar exhortations about an impending blessing. What is disconcerting about it is that the normal Christian life is supposed to be lived in the expectation of God’s provision. The assurance of these expectations is encased in His promises. These promises go beyond just meeting our needs, but they are also the vehicles by which we partake of the nature of God. 2 Pet 1:4 - Whereby are given unto us exceeding great and precious promises: that by these ye might be partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust. Being partakers of God’s divine nature is not exciting to us. It is not something for which we are willing to endure hardness, make sacrifices, or give our lives. What excites us is conformity to the world’s standards of blessing, prosperity, and good fortune. So, the periods of our gathering when the church gets noisy are predictable. And for preachers and teachers we now have a ‘go-to’ place when we sense crowd resistance. We do not just get animated by the hearing of only that which soothes our emotions, tickles our ears, speaks to our needs, and gratifies our greed. We are aggressive, passionate, and loud in the way we pursue them. However, this has made making sense of some verses in the scripture almost impossible for some people to grasp. I offer these two as examples: Luke 9:23 - And he said to them all, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me. Or Jas 1:2 - My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations; Jas 1:3 - Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience. Jas 1:4 -But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing; There is nothing wrong with claiming the promises of God, but there is also something to be said for standing on, and walking in, the promises of God. Walking in the quiet confidence of the word allows confidence in God to become our nature, not an event. It is the absolute certainty that God is righteous in His judgments, faithful to His promises, unchanging, and always in control. It is living quietly in the knowledge “that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.

Ewart (Junior) Forde

christian lifestyle >> Issue No. 2 - 2017

It’s Just a Thought

How do I stop sinning? Five steps to help you defeat sin and keep in step with the Spirit

KELLY CARLSON

o one robs a bank because they want to go to prison. Prison is just the consequence pointing to a poor decision. Maybe if law-breakers considered prison first, fewer banks would be robbed. Bank-robbers or not, the same is true for us. You won’t go to prison for lying, cursing, verbal cruelty, premarital sex, or parental disrespect, but the concept is no different. If only we, as God’s law-breakers, considered first the outcome of our poor decisions, we’d make fewer of them. If we considered first the pricey cost of our sin, we’d be more likely to resist temptation. But how about if we don’t? What about those decisions we cannot reverse? How do we stop the sin? Is it too late to keep in step with God’s Spirit? Is there a point when we’ve drifted too far? Never.

With God’s help and direction from His Word, we can always step our way back from sin to surrender.

Step 1: Hate the sin Typically, it’s not until after we experience sin’s consequence that we actually want to stop it. For example: • Our smoking habit leads to cancer • Our dishonesty hurts a friend • Our procrastination leads to a failed exam Sin’s consequences can start out minimal. However, if left unaddressed it will grow to far worse. We have to want to hate the sin, to want to change, before we will ever be utterly freed from that sin.

Cont’d on P. 41 christian lifestyle >> Issue No. 2 - 2017

Who’s the Fairest? (Hon orin g

ou r

Teneisha Johnson

n classic Disney, animated films, a female character receives seven times the praise for her appearance as for her skill and actions. Further research indicates that 60 % of early films focused compliments on the females’ looks and a small percentage towards their actual abilities. Such patterns I strongly believe send children and even adults a message about “what it means to be a girl or boy”.

Wo m e n )

in conjunction with the observance of International Women’s Day where once again women were honoured. According to the accurate records of the Cayman Compass, last year Miriam Foster, director of Cayman’s Family Resource Centre, was recognized for her work in services for youth, women and families, and her leadership of the center. Wow! We will always have an evolving sense of self and I strongly believe we should point towards a world in which a person’s gender is neither an advantage nor an impediment.

Carmen Fought from Pitzer College says she believes it suggests to girls that, “their value is based on their appearance”. Fortunately, in newer films Disney has flipped the script and movies such as Brave, place more emphasis on courage and abilities rather than beauty alone.

No country has achieved full gender equality. In North America and much of Europe, women have made such progress that girls have reasons to believe that anything is possible. However, in too many places, girls and women are still the property of their fathers or husbands. They are sometimes denied food, medicine,

Throughout March, several events were organized

Cont’d on P. 35

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CI Cadet Corps’ HQ Officially Opens For Business

L-r: Deputy Chief Officer in the Ministry of Community Affairs, Youth and Sports Perry Powell; Assistant Chief Officer Joel Francis; Chief Officer Dorine Whittaker; the Minister for Community Affairs, Youth and Sports Hon. Osbourne Bodden, Commandant, Lt. Col. Bobeth O’Garro, Ministerial Councillor Roy McTaggart and Policy Adviser Debbie Ann Whittaker.

he official opening of the Cayman Islands Cadet Corps’ forever home took place at its new headquarters on Middle Road, George Town on Thursday, 6 April 2017.

L-r: Minister for Community Affairs, Youth and Sports, Hon. Osbourne Bodden; Ministerial Counsellor Roy McTaggart and Lieutenant Alphonso Gayle.

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Sited near the CTMH Doctors Hospital, the facility was funded by the Ministry for Community Affairs, Youth and Sports, following extensive renovation work that was project managed by the Public Works Department. The building contains meeting rooms, ample storage for Corps equipment and a kitchen. It will serve as base for volunteers and be used by adult training and volunteer organisations. Before moving into its first permanent HQ since the passing of Hurricane Ivan 12 years ago, the Corps’

Ministry officials and Cayman Islands Cadet Corps officers.

had been using Bodden Town Civic Centre since 2013. The dedication ceremony included speeches, prayers, a ribbon cutting and a tour of the facility by the Minister of Youth, Ministerial Councillor for Health and Culture, Roy McTaggart, ministry staff, parents and cadets. In remarks, the Minister for Community Affairs, Youth and Sports, Hon. Osbourne Bodden, welcomed the Cadet Corps to its new location, mentioning that the headquarters was the largest of the projects that the Corps had recently identified and achieved. In opening the new offices, Minister Bodden said that it was his view that the Cadet Corps was one of the strongest

Pastor Torrance Bobb of the First Assembly of God gave a prayer of dedication.

youth organisations in creating positive, community-minded citizens and he was pleased that he was able to support them in obtaining a permanent home. He was happy to learn that the volunteers had been motivated by having a permanent home for the Corps since they were the backbone of the organisation. He added that he looked forward to the time when the Cadet Corps could have its own parade grounds to further strengthen the programme and its effectiveness. Commandant, Lt. Col. Bobeth O’Garro added that since moving to their new premises, they had had more visits from officers, parents and cadets than they had in the past four years while in

Bodden Town. In thanking the Ministry, she said: “The CICC is grateful for the support of the current Minister and his team who has worked with us since being assigned to his Ministry, and helped us to secure this building as a CICC asset.” The facility will also be used for conducting leadership training, as well as online learning for classes such as First Aid and diving, she concluded. Among the next strategic goals that the Corps is looking to achieve are a training facility with a parade square, training rooms, dorms and a new bus. (GIS) Captions and photos by Elphina Jones

Who’s the Fairest? Cont’d from P.32 and education which are readily available to men. Historian Yuval Noah Harari, in his masterly account of how Homo Sapiens evolved, explains how women can be defined not only in terms of their biological roles but also in terms of their cultural roles. As Harari describes it, females – human beings with two X chromosomes and the bodies and hormones to match – have not changed. But women-human beings who operate in society and exercise rights under law have progressed from being the illiterate

property of their husbands to being equal and educated citizens with the same rights as men under law. Most recently Bill and Melinda Gates stated that poverty was sexist. They believe that the poorer the society, the less power women have. Men decide if a woman is allowed to go outside, talk to other women, and earn an income. The male dominance in poorer societies is mind-blowing. Fortunately research shows that as a society becomes better off, a woman’s position in that society improves. But how do women in poor societies get

more power now? Actually, women get more power from other women. About 75 million women are involved in selfhelp groups in India alone. The groups might form to help women get loans or share health practices, but once things get started, the women take it in the direction they want to go. That is empowerment! So we ask ourselves, who is the fairest? As the King of Pop, Michael Jackson so famously stated in “Man in the Mirror”, or in my case, “Woman in the Mirror” - No message can be any clearer...If you want to make the world a better place, take a look at yourself and make that change!

christian lifestyle >> Issue No. 2 - 2017

Cayman Islands 2017 Literary Awards

social scene

christian lifestyle >> Issue No. 2 - 2017

wards

PSPB Brac Pensionersâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Appreciation Event

social scene

christian lifestyle >> Issue No. 2 - 2017

Three Components to Casting Clear Vision

Mark Dance

hy is a vision so important for a pastor and a church? Vision determines your direction and prioritizes your limited time and resources.

I have learned so much over the years from Thom Rainer, Eric Geiger, and Will Mancini about vision, and much of what I write about in these next two posts I have learned from them and others. I have also picked up a few ideas from almost thirty years of pastoral experience.

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Here are three essential components to casting a clear vision.

Your Vision Must Be Clear Before You Cast It Vision serves as a ministry road map, giving both direction and efficiency. I don’t know how many times I have started driving in the general direction of my destination before consulting a GPS. In ministry, it is best to get good ministry directions before you share them with others. “Where there is no vision, the people perish” (Proverbs 29:18). The Hebrew word “hazon” means “to see.” People can’t follow a vision they can’t clearly see. Vance Havner said, “If there is a mist in the pulpit, there is a fog in the pew.”

Your Vision Must Be Consistent Before They Will Understand It

in a consistent conviction to serve our community, based on the timeless Great Commandment and Great Commission. A conviction is similar to a passion. The difference is found in your tenacity. Passion can be big, but short term. A conviction is long term, and requires determination and resolve. “Once you have clarified your vision, many important decisions will have already been made.” Eric Geiger

Your Vision Must Be Celebrated Before They Will Own It Celebrating even small successes will reinforce members’ confidence as well as clarify the roadmap in their minds. I have found that the influence of a live or video testimony is greatest immediately after a life-changing experience. Social media is also a legitimate way to celebrate a vision win.

Your members are flooded with information, ideas, and advertisements. They need to hear and see your vision many times before it will stick.

Your church vision becomes what you celebrate. Put photos of your members living out your vision on the walls of your church and on your Facebook page. Give consistent shout-outs during your sermons.

A personal vision that captures people’s attention will capture your heart first and will not go away with time. Mere ideas usually fade with time, but authentic vision grows with time if it is cast and implemented consistently.

“The people rejoiced at the willing response of their leaders, for they had given freely and wholeheartedly to the Lord. King David also rejoiced greatly” (1 Chronicles 29:9).

In the last church I pastored, our relocation and ministry center were dual projects which enabled us to serve our city from two different campuses. Over the course of more than a decade, the vision became clearer while the strategy evolved and changed several times along the way. Our vision was rooted

Your church members will be inspired by the vision they see clearly and consistently celebrated by you and other respected leaders in your ministry. Otherwise, they may grow bored, distracted, or even disruptive.

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25 29

40 45 49

37 42

51 54

58 64

38 43

55 59

56 60

Unless otherwise mentioned, scriptures are taken from NIV

ACROSS 1. ____ for that day is great (Jer 30:7) 5. Abb. for the first book of the New Testament 9. Therefore, since these ___ are undeniable, you ought to be quiet (Acts 19:36) 14. he kept back ___ of the money for himself (Acts 5:2) 15. dead man, “by this time there is a bad ___ (John 11:39) 16. the Fish Gate and encircling the hill of ___ (2 Chron 33:14) 17. looked like ___ ___ of glass, clear as crystal (1,3) (Rev 4:6) 18. and drink with him after he ____ from the dead (Acts 10:41) 19. I may tell all my bones: they look and ____ upon me (Ps 22:17) 20. Woe to the women who sew magic ___ on all their wrists (Ezek 13:18) 22. as a follower of the Way, which they call a ___ (Acts 24:14) 24. When they ____ the star, they rejoiced (Matt 2:10) 25. If anyone ___ me with seven fresh thongs (Judg 16:7) 27. spoke to the angel, and he put his sword back into its ___ (1 Chron 21:27) 29. He began to speak ___ in the synagogue (Acts 18:26) 31. the Pharisees began to ____ him vehemently (Luke 11:53) 33. My help ___ from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth (Ps 121:2) 34. turned and saw that they were being attacked at both front and ___ (2 Chr 13:14) 37. The death he died, he died to sin ___ for all (Rom 6:10) 39. God created man in his ____ image (Gen 1:27) 40. we worked night and day, laboring and ___ (2 Thess 3:8) 43. said to me, ___ ___ going to make you fruitful (1,2) (Gen 48:4) 44. The law of his God is in his heart his feet do not ___ (Ps 37:31) 46. He will not ___ you or forsake you (1 Chr 28:20) 47. fighting men who volunteered to serve in the ___ (1 Chron 12:38) 49. Go, ___ a lookout and have him report what he sees (Isa 21:6) 51. represent four kingdoms that will ___ from his nation (Dan 8:22) 53. He ordered the furnace heated seven times ___ than usual (Dan 3:19) 55. being not a forgetful hearer, but a ____ of the work (James 1:25) 57. grandson of Terah (Gen 11:31) 58. for your little ____, and for your wives (Gen 45:19) 60. he who ___ himself with the Lord is one with him in spirit (1 Cor 6:17) 63. Having believed, you were marked in him with ___ ___ (1,4) (Eph 1:13) 65. In ___ ____ it shall be made with oil; and when it is baken (1,3) (Lev 6:21) 67. Samuel took a ___ of oil, and poured it upon (1 Sam 10:1) KJV 68. the ___ forest has been cut down (Zech 11:2) 69. Do not ___ in your heart after her beauty (Prov 6:25) 70. Salvation is found in no one ___, for there is no other name (Acts 4:12) 71. that ancient serpent, who is the devil, or ___ (Rev 20:2) 72. A state of confusion 73. silver in two bags, with two ___ of clothing (2 Kings 5:23)

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DOWN 1. he came____, and drew near. (2 Sam 18:25) 2. The LORD Almighty will ___ them with a whip (Isa 10:26) 3. Which ___ ___ shadow of things to come; but the body is (3,1) (Col 2:17) 4. Terrors ___ him on every side and dog his every step (Job 18:11) 5. I will fetch a ___ of bread, and comfort ye your hearts (Gen 18:5) KJV 6. Why make ye this ___, and weep? (Mark 5:39) KJV 7. He will surely violently turn and ____ thee like a ball (Isaiah 22:18) KJV 8. king of Tyre had furnished Solomon with cedar ____ (1 King 9:11) 9. Kings will be your ___ fathers, and their queens your (Isa 49:23) 10. A man finds joy in giving an ____ reply (Prov 15:23) 11. despise not thou the ____ of the Lord (Heb 12:5) KJV 12. the father of Abram, Nahor and Haran (Gen 11:26) 13. to kill (Ps 78:34) KJV 21. as the colour of amber, out of the ___ of the fire (Ezek 1:4) (KJV) 23. He makes the depths ___ like a boiling caldron (Job 41:31) 26. sailed into ____, and landed at Tyre (Acts 21:3) 28. Four days ____ I was fasting until this hour (Acts 10:30) 29. I see a solid gold lampstand with a ___ at the top (Zech 4:2) 30. saying, Alleluia: for the Lord God ___ reigneth (Rev 19:6) KJV 32. onyx stones and other ___ to be mounted (Ex 25:7) 33. I will give to drink without ___ from the spring of the water of life (Rev 21:6) 35. saying, ___, Eli, lama sabachthani? (Matt 27:46) 36. What ___ thee, O thou sea, that thou fleddest (Ps 114:5) KJV 38. a ___ of bread baked over hot coals (I King 19:6) 41. with every kind of plague as ___ as they want (Rev 11:6) 42. like plants in the field, like tender ___ shoots (Isa 37:27) 45. was the golden ____ that had manna, and Aaron’s rod (Heb 9:4) 48. Samuel said, “Send for him; we will not sit down until he ___ (1 Sam 16:11) 50. Do not trust in extortion or take pride in ___ goods (Ps 62:10) 52. by casting up ____, and building forts (Ezek 17:17) 53. One of the minor prophets 54. why should there be wrath against the ____ of the king (Ezra 7:23) 56. Now shall the ____ tremble in the day of thy fall (Ezek 26:18) KJV 57. The Angel which redeemed me from all evil, bless the ___ (Gen.48:16) KJV 59. neither cold nor hot, I will ___ thee out of my mouth (Rev 3:16) (KJV) 61. son of man, take thee a ____, and lay it before thee (Ezek 4:1) KJV 62. drove the sea back with a strong ___ wind (Exod 14:21) 64. If ye have faith ___ ___ grain of mustard seed (2,1) (Matt 17:20) 66. ancient mode of transportation Answers on Page 44

How do I stop sinning? Cont’d from P. 31 Don’t be fooled. We cannot justify our sin and gratify our desires, while simultaneously walking in the Spirit. And yet, without a despicable consequence, we are privy to hold onto unrighteousness. Sadly for some, it takes tragedy or loss to awaken their souls to seek God for help; to not only listen to our Teacher’s Word, but to live it out.

Step 2: Locate the source of sin

is not really life at all and God is more than fair. We know because He sent Jesus to experience every temptation, and He gave us a Spirit to remind us: God’s Power is unwavering.

The best way to understand this verse is to read what it doesn’t say. Galatians 5:16 doesn’t say, “Do not gratify the desires of the flesh, and then you will walk by the Spirit.”

There must come a point when we are so fed up with sin, not just its external consequence but its deep roots within, before we will authentically seek to be changed. We must admit it, submit it, and receive what God is saying. Hand it over. Be filled with Jesus instead.

Read it again. You might even make a note. Because our power to stop lies in the great difference.

To hate sin only because of its consequence (going to prison, for example) isn’t hating sin at all. It’s like trapping a house mouse but not addressing its nest. More mice will arrive from where the first came just like sin multiplies when we allow its source to remain.

Step 4: Fill the emptiness with good

This is exactly why we must locate sin’s start. It’s not external (as much as we wish to place blame). Sin is innate. It’s something we’re born with. Our heart is the rodent’s nest. From the heart comes the likes of pride, hate, and selfishness. Unless we ask God to come in and take our sin by Christ’s Power, the sin will infest our lives like unwanted mice.

Thankfully, Jesus is well aware of our enemies - Satan, sin, and ourselves (we can be our own enemies). He knew our attempt to overcome sin might feel like we are going backwards - even as we walk with Him. Thankfully, God gives us His Word to combat discouragement in those times we want to give up. Galatians 5:16 tells us how to redeem what sin stole and replace with that which is good.

Step 3: Invite the exterminator Jesus, in His kindness, allows sin’s consequence in order to keep us from greater sin. He teaches us that life in sin

Eliminating any sin from your life leaves a vacancy where it’s been. You can bet the impostor, devious and devouring, would love to fill the space with something equally as evil.

“But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh.” Let’s camp here a minute:

Step 5: Resist like Jesus The power to change doesn’t rest on you or me. Our role is simply to keep close to the Spirit. Seeing as sin cannot exist in the presence of our Holy God, He fights the desires which lead us to poor decisions. The invitation isn’t “try harder.” It’s not, “be tougher,” either. The invitation is “Come.” It’s “stay close.” Our need for a Savior is exactly why Jesus became our sin-replacement. He came before us to overcome sin, and He left the Bible to us, to show us how He did it. Jesus relied on God’s Word, and He didn’t make excuses. Jesus denied every temptation and followed through completely. And guess what? You are the reason He did it. The Spirit of Christ wants to walk with you. Start by memorizing and meditating on God’s word to: Think Rightly: Romans 12:1,2; Be Empowered: Colossians 1:29; and Rely on Christ: Proverbs 3:5,6.

New Provisions for the Future Cont’d from P. 24 sacrifice.”[7] Geldenhuys assumes Jesus meant it spiritually, and sees the disciples who take it literally as “still blind to the spiritual nature of the Lord’s work and kingdom.”[8] Green sees Jesus’ words as “a metaphorical reference to the coming [spiritual] reality,” and his words “It is enough” as an expression of his exasperation with the disciples’ dullness. [9] Calvin declares, “It was truly shameful and stupid ignorance, that the disciples, after having been so often informed about bearing the cross, imagine that they must fight with swords of iron.”[10] And

nowhere in the New Testament, besides the incident with Peter in the Garden, do Christians take up arms as they spread the faith.

Two Swords (22:38) Let’s look at verse 38 next, before we conclude with verse 37. “The disciples said, ‘See, Lord, here are two swords.’ ‘That is enough,’ he replied.” (22:38) What does Jesus’ reply mean? “Enough” is the Greek adjective hikanos, meaning “sufficient, adequate, large enough.”[11]

While it could mean, “Two will be sufficient at this time,” it very probably means “That’s enough of this conversation.”[12] Does Jesus encourage his disciples to equip themselves with a sword in the coming days in order to carry out their mission among a hostile world? Though others might disagree, I think perhaps so. But the main point of this passage is to be prepared and self-sufficient for the next phase of their ministry, determined to serve the Kingdom no matter what.

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What Goes Around One day a man saw an old lady, stranded on the side of the road, but even in the dim light of day, he could see she needed help. So he pulled up in front of her Mercedes and got out. His Pontiac was still sputtering when he approached her. Even with the smile on his face, she was worried. No one had stopped to help for the last hour or so. Was he going to hurt her? He didn’t look safe; he looked poor and hungry. He could see that she was frightened, standing out there in the cold. He knew how she felt. It was those chills which only fear can put in you. He said, “I’m here to help you, ma’am. Why don’t you wait in the car where it’s warm? By the way, my name is Bryan Anderson.” Well, all she had was a flat tire, but for an old lady, that was bad enough. Bryan crawled under the car looking for a place to put the jack, skinning his knuckles a time or two. Soon he was able to change the tire. But he had to get dirty and his hands hurt. As he was tightening up the lug nuts, she rolled down the window and began to talk to him. She told him that she was from St. Louis and was only just passing through. She couldn’t thank him enough for coming to her aid. Bryan just smiled as he closed her trunk. The lady asked how much she owed him. Any amount would have been all right with her. She already imagined all the awful things that could have happened

had he not stopped. Bryan never thought twice about being paid. This was not a job to him. This was helping someone in need, and God knows there were plenty who had given him a hand in the past. He had lived his whole life that way, and it never occurred to him to act any other way. He told her that if she really wanted to pay him back, the next time she saw someone who needed help, she could give that person the assistance they needed, and Bryan added, “And think of me.” He waited until she started her car and drove off. It had been a cold and depressing day, but he felt good as he headed for home, disappearing into the twilight. A few miles down the road the lady saw a small cafe. She went in to grab a bite to eat, and take the chill off before she made the last leg of her trip home. It was a dingy looking restaurant. Outside were two old gas pumps. The whole scene was unfamiliar to her. The waitress came over and brought a clean towel to wipe her wet hair. She had a sweet smile, one that even being on her feet for the whole day couldn’t erase. The lady noticed the waitress was nearly eight months pregnant, but she never let the strain and aches change her attitude. The old lady wondered how someone who had so little could be so giving to a stranger. Then she remembered Bryan.

bill. The waitress quickly went to get change for her hundred dollar bill, but the old lady had slipped right out the door. She was gone by the time the waitress came back. The waitress wondered where the lady could be. Then she noticed something written on the napkin. There were tears in her eyes when she read what the lady wrote: “You don’t owe me anything. I have been there too. Somebody once helped me out, the way I’m helping you. If you really want to pay me back, here is what you do, do not let this chain of love end with you.” Under the napkin were four more $100 bills. Well, there were tables to clear, sugar bowls to fill, and people to serve, but the waitress made it through another day. That night when she got home from work and climbed into bed, she was thinking about the money and what the lady had written. How could the lady have known how much she and her husband needed it? With the baby due next month, it was going to be hard… She knew how worried her husband was, and as he lay sleeping next to her, she gave him a soft kiss and whispered soft and low, “Everything’s going to be all right. I love you, Bryan Anderson.” There is an old saying “What goes around comes around.” Sourced from the Internet

After the lady finished her meal, she paid with a hundred dollar

christian lifestyle >> Issue No. 2 - 2017

sudoku

All Nations United Pentecostal Church (UPC)

Instructions: Solve the 16x16 Sudoku so the numbers 1 to 9 appear once in each row, column and 4x4 box.

23A Woodlake Drive George Town Grand Cayman Tel: (345) 949 9533

Puzzle and wordsearch answers

christian lifestyle >> Issue No. 2 - 2017