December 2012

December 2012

COGNITION MAGAZINE

Iris P. Sultry Songstress Holiday Fashion

By Vernon Clothing

+ +

Tips to Beat the

“HOLIDAY BLUES” NOLA Christmas

Gift Guide Pg.

30

From the Editor

O

k so we got less than a month to get ready for

2013. Are you as excited as I am?

o lm Malc

ro

st Arm

I feel like 2012 has been the

. ng Jr

year of laying foundations and preparation for enhanced

destiny and 2013 will be the year for

living in that destiny.

We at Cognition Magazine™ are doing our best to get you ready to live in your destiny while looking good and being healthy. This issue is dedicated to treating yourself, looking good all while being mindful of our thoughts and feelings. We do understand that the holiday season can be tough for some so we gave you a lil’ somethin sumthin for that too! Read this issue, check out the pictures, check out the featured products and let us know what you #THINK. Think Mind, Think Body...Think YOU!

Yours in #WELLNESS, Malcolm M. Armstrong Jr. Founder & Chief Editor marmstrong@cognitionmagazine.com Follow us on twitter: @cognition_mag Like us on Facebook: Facebook.com/cognitionmagazinellc

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h t i w ISE

T R E ADV

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MASTHEAD Chief Editor & Founder— Malcolm Armstrong Jr. Operations & Outreach— Alvin House Marketing & PR— Ja’Nae Lewis Events & Special Projects Coordinator— Dannie Wallace Leadership Support— Corey Armstrong Contributors— Ada Craig-Roberson, Ed. D., LCSW Alanna McCreary Darrin L. Harris Deanna Theriot Gentelle Pedescleaux Lyiena McMillan Shawniece “QB” McMillan Suzanne Mayo-Theus, Ph. D.

CONTACT US Cognition Magazine, LLC VISIT OUR WEBSITE AT: WWW.COGNITIONMAGAZINE.COM For Advertising information email: advertising@cognitionmagazine.com For General Inquiries email: cognitionmagazinellc@cognitionmagazine.com Phone Contact: (504) 208-0704 Connect with us on social media: Facebook.com/cognitionmagazinellc Twitter.com/Cognition_mag Cognition Magazine ™ is a trademarked product of Cognition Magazine, LLC. Reproduction of any part of this publication without the express written consent of the publisher is strictly prohibited. The information within this publication is believed to be accurate but Cognition Magazine does not guarantee accuracy.

Cognition Magazine, LLC will not be held responsible for the quality or performance of goods and services provided by advertisers or any other portion of this publication. © 2012 Cognition Magazine, LLC 4

CONTENTS 2.

Editors Note

6.

Entertainment & Fashion

22. Real Thoughts 24. Ask Dr. Ada 26. Cover Story...Iris P. 29. Benefits of Smiling 30. Holiday Gift Guide 32. What Blacks Should Know 35. Thoughts After Dark 37. Be Inspired

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ENTERTAINMENT and

fashion JOE JACKSON Has Stroke

Lyiena or La from A Dose of LA gives you the news with a twist for Cognition Mag. Not only does she bring you the news to keep you informed, but she writes pieces to inspire and uplift her readers. She's a Writer, Rapper, Blogger, Public Speaker and Socialite. You can catch her at a hip hop show, promoting events, updating blogs, volunteering in her church and evangelizing in the community. Follow her on Twitter @lanino_brown Intel courtesy of : adoseofla.blogspot.com

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More

Years

Legendary Joe Jackson suffered his 3rd mild stroke on Thursday, November 29th in Las Vegas.

Jackson whom is 83 years old is expected to be released from the hospital soon and is reportedly in good spirits. His past two strokes have been spread throughout the past 5 years.

2nd Lawsuit Filed for Elmo puppeteer A second lawsuit has been filed against Elmo Puppeteer, Kevin Clash. The lawsuit accuses the voice behind the popular Sesame Street figure of engaging in a sexual relationship with a minor. The suit was filed on Tuesday, November 27th in New York at the U.S. District court. The accuser is under John Doe and is a Florida resident. John Doe claims that Clash lured him into sexual relations in 2000 when he was 16 years of age.

Chris Brown...again After much nail-biting media coverage, President Barack Obama has won a second term in office. It seems as though America has now turned into a Democrat vs.

Republican battleground.

Lets stay tuned and we again wish our re-elected President the best.

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Chris Brown hits headlines again. Brown has signed to Wilhelmina Modeling Agency and has deleted his twitter account after argument smh.

Brown and singer Rihanna declare that they're not dating but these social media pics are showing something else.

Rihanna posted this picture (left) on her Instagram account with the caption “F***yopictures I dont wanna leave!!! Killed it tonight baby.” Not dating huh? As long as they are non-violent & staying out of trouble, we’re good!

Ecstasy as Possible Treatment for PTSD? Clinical trials have been going on since 2004 to discover the effects of Ecstasy on those suffering with PTSD and the results look favorable. Participants were given a controlled version of Ecstasy called “MDMA” and 10 of the 12 participants who took the drug showed no symptoms of PTSD after two months of treatment. The drug is being used because it is know to reduce current anxieties and allows for emotional expression. Approximately 8% of Americans suffer from PTSD and its more prevalent in veterans.

HE

RS

2013 WINTER FASHION TRENDS

By: Stylishcube.com

“Relaxed Voyager” is done in soft pastel colors with accents of red, brown and black. Comfortable materials, the combination of volume and fitting forms, soft lines and the actual layering - is a fashionable and comfortable image of the city traveler.

“Soft Gothic” - a series of Reserved evening wear of fall-winter 2012-2013 uses the gothic style, which is trendy this season: fabrics with fine texture, bright tinsels and ornaments, noble shades of wine, forest green, black and gold.

HIS

Men's collection of Reserved fall-winter 2012-2013 begins with a section “Electric Heritage”, representing the clothes in the city everyday style with the relevant notes of the British classics. Individual attention should be given to combined models of jackets and vests, trendy textured materials and rich fall color palette.

“Sporty Chic” – is not only the name of the next series of men's fall-winter Reserved collection, but it is also one of the most fashionable styles of the season. We should also note a soft color palette, and the availability of ultra-fashionable quilted and knitted jackets 7

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o T s k n a h T l a Speci

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Models: Gentelle Pedescleaux & Arthur Arnolie Photography by: Malcolm Armstrong Jr. Venue: Nola’s Finest Bar & Grill Wardrobe: Vernon Clothing Makeup: LaShanda R. Jackson Accessories: Premier Designs Wrapped Gifts by: Box, Paper Scissor

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11

12

13 Red Cocktail Dress by: Mess Dress

Navy Blue Suit by: BCBG Fashion Tie by: John Varvatos White Dress Shirt by: John Varvatos Navy Blue Pocket Square by: Vernon Clothing

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15

16 Black cocktail Dress by: Mess Dress

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Grey Contrast Lapel Blazer by: Luca Falcone Custom Clothiers Red Velvet Bow Tie by: Wildlife Reserve Black Slacks: Vernon Clothing

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REAL Thoughts While engaging in Twitter banter with a homey of superior rhetorical repute, I was introduced to my latest reason to wail mercilessly on yall.

Theriot

BEING

na By: Dean

R-A-T-C-H-E-T

Here are some of the lyrics to LL Cool J’s latest single “Ratchet” VERSE Hunger Games begun Sitting on the side of my bed, count my 1’s Talking bout you and me would make a cute son Convincing me, you ain’t really seeing no one “I love spending time with you, it’s so fun” But thinkin’ to myself, “Bitch please, I’m done” Your shit’s unreal I guess I should blame it on them damn high heels The way your skin look when your silk blose peel That damn D’Angelo and his how does it feel You went from jump off to G4 jets All type of baller saying I got necks I should’ve ignored you when you sent that text No, I couldn’t afford you when we first had sex Had to do it anyway And I would do this shit all over any day Cuz you a nasty thing Drive me up the walls with the skills you bring But I hope you’re okay with a little Burger King Cuz the bills be whoppers when you’re fine dining HOOK She’s so ratchet, she’s so ratchet But she’s so bad make you throw cash at it First I’m gonna smash it, then I’m gonna leave it You ain’t gonna do me like you did him neither I’mma get mine (can I have some cash?)

It’s time to get rid of yo ratchet ass I’mma get mine (can I get a little money for gas?)

I should’ve never been with your ratchet ass VERSE My pockets feel light Woke up this morning and something wasn’t right The numbers are all off You got your hair done and it looks all soft Here if I’m in knot no place You giving me the innocent poke it face I feel weird when we embrace You treat my house like it’s our place And you go hard in the bed Am I doing that much or do you need meds?

I mean I believe what you said But you was screaming and she was giving me head Aggressive shoppin and credit card droppin Relax baby, ain’t none of that poppin Once that starts ain’t no stopping The swap meet got real good cotton…

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It would appear that the Ladies' beloved LL decided to take a step backward into the shadows of popular culture, drop his True Religions and dump out this hot steaming load of misogynist crap. When I heard this last week, I assumed that the entire female population had to already be in an uproar about it and I would be tragically behind the gun on my Wail. After a tireless 30 minute Google quest for outcry, however, I found that NO ONE had ANYTHING to say about the fact that LL has not only degraded himself with these kindergarten ass lyrics and GROSSLY misused the slang term “ratchet” but this song is a perfect example of everything that is wrong with pop (read "rap") music today. Of all the blog posts and commentary I read, the main beef contemporaries have with LL's latest lyrical "effort" (because I can tell he didn't try) is that his sound is "dated" and he made a useless attempt to cling to his bygone youth and musical relevance. I have yet to read a review that mentions the negative and damaging ideals promoted in the LYRICAL CONTENT of the song. This, of course, just further goes to prove that not only do people fail to question the messages they're consuming but music listeners could genuinely care less about what you say as long as you're the right person saying it over the right beat.

In music, film, television and all forms of modern media, young women and girls (especially Black and Latina women) are being reduced to nothing with a perpetual barrage of imagery that would insist their worth is defined by the bulge at the bottom of their backs and the pliability of their legs. Is it true that there are some broads who would rather flat back their way out of economic slavery than go to college, hone a talent or learn a trade? Hell yes.

They are called prostitutes and some of them live quite well. Am I glorifying prostitution? A little… but have I propped up the profession as much as the very SAME people who scorn it MOST? Not by far. The men/boys/fools LL emanates in this song decry women for playing games of material gain using pussy like dice are the EXACT same ones who write elegies praising these "ratchet chicks" for their ability to dance upside down on a stripper pole. So

what you're saying, gentlemen, is that you mean to manipulate images of young women so that they might do your bidding only to be later demonized for fulfilling your every desire of them. Right.

Furthermore... do I detect a hint of jealousy here among the machismo of hip-hop culture? Is this direct contradiction of tastes based on contempt for women because we hold so much power in such a seemingly unimposing weapon as pussy? It must bother you that the market value of dick has been in decline for ages. It IS a man's world after all, so it would only be fair that MALE sexuality get top billing. You don't get pussy whipped, do you, homeboy?

You whips PUSSY. I would be mad too in this topsy-turvy world where the womb trumps the almighty phallus. Having a penis must be so very frustrating with a stigma embedded in every inch (or lack thereof). With great power comes greater scrutiny, huh? No matter how bountiful your bank account you still have to bite your nails in wonder of the favorable size of your member. To combat that lack, the great patriarchal consciousness remains diligent in its efforts to conceptualize as many ways as it can to inflict its own insecurity upon the very reason man has been damned to live in constant fear of his nekkedness--woman. If it wasn't for Eve trolling Adam way back when we'd all be bare-assed and contented in Paradise... hence the praise/shame approach to women who take matters into their own orifices to get ahead in this, our maledominated society. As usual... we woman have brought this villainy upon ourselves. But if I may, gentlemen, I do have a few pieces of advice to impart...

If you don't like these monsters in miniskirts and Louboutins, stop building 'em homey. You want a better brand of woman? Stop rewarding the generic ones so handsomely. You want us to stop making eyes at your wallets? Stop throwing your bank statements in our faces. It's not rocket science, man hoes. You want something better? DISCERN BETTER.

IMAGINE YOUR BUSINEESS HERE ADVERTISE WITH US! GREAT RATES & GREAT CIRCULATION Contact: advertising@cognitionmagazine.com

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P.S: Would you people PLEASE stop comparing LL's cut to Brian McKnight's "Let Me Show You How Your Pussy Work" because quite frankly "Ratchet" is just offensive while Brian McKnight created comedy GOLD. I haven't laughed that hard since I first saw "The Human Tornado"...

ASK Dr. Ada Dr. Ada Craig Roberson is a dedicated wife, mother and advocate for those in need. She is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker within the state of Louisiana and holds a Doctoral degree in Counseling Psychology. Ada has a wealth of experience in working with disadvantaged individuals and has taken the term “Life Enhancement” into a whole new meaning within the social services industry. Her ability to truly understand human behavior has allowed her to transform the lives of many individuals, some of which were hopeless in the eyes of society. She loves a good piece of fine chocolate, a good challenge and stimulating activities. If you have an issue you would like to bring to Dr. Ada’s attention please email askdrada@cognitionmagazine.com or make a post on the Ask Dr. Ada page on www.cognitionmagazine.com

Dr. Ada, How do you deal with infidelity in a monogamous relationship and should it be expected? It happened once in my current relationship and I’m really doubting that fidelity exists anymore especially looking at reality TV. -Inquiring Mind Inquiring Mind, Let me start by saying that Reality TV, while it may not technically be scripted, is certainly not reality, and shouldn’t serve as the basis for any important decisions that you make concerning your life. Secondly, fidelity does indeed exist, yet many of us have been in relationships at some point in our lives that have been plagued by infidelity. How we respond to the betrayal will have implications, not only for that relationship, but also for all of our future relationships. If you are resolved to remaining in your current relationship, you and your partner should explore the reasons behind the infidelity. There is certainly never a good reason, but the communication required to process the feelings and circumstances that may have led to the cheating is important to the relationship.

The primary difficulty that often arises out of infidelity is a lack of trust. The person that you once put your faith and trust in has betrayed that trust leaving you with doubts about the relationship and yourself, and feeling resentful.

Therefore, it is important that if you decide to remain in the relationship, you commit to forgiveness. Without that, there is no way you will be able to open your heart to trusting them again. Mistrust undoubtedly leads to jealousy and suspicion, and will keep you trapped in the cycle of confusion and heartache.

If you decide to move on from the relationship, you must be committed to allowing yourself to trust again. You should communicate your expectations of the relationship, and determine if your potential partner shares your values. Avoid punishing your current partner for the mistakes of your ex. If you can’t do that, then you aren’t ready to move on to a new relationship. When you are, keep your eyes and your heart open!

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Dr. Ada, I have a daughter that has dropped out of college and I am worried that life will be hard for her without a degree. How can I get her to realize that she is wasting time and possibly making a mistake with her future?

-Loving Mother, Loving Mother, As a parent, I certainly understand the desire to try to protect your child from “learning the hard way”, but I find that experience is a very good teacher. In the end, it doesn’t matter what you say nor do, your daughter will not likely decide to go back to school until she is motivated to go on her own. Sometimes the lessons learned through hardship are the most valuable lessons we learn. While I realize that you don’t want to see her struggle, in the end, you have made your choices and lived your life, and now it is time for your daughter to live hers. However, it is important that you don’t enable her. That means that, if you are providing any financial support for her at all, it should stop. This includes paying for her cell phone bill, giving her money to buy clothes or go to the hair salon, paying for bus fare, gas money, car insurance, etc. If she is grown enough to drop out of college, she is certainly grown enough to support herself. Now, I’m not suggesting that you kick her out of the house if she’s living with you, but you should definitely set a timeline for her to move out on her own and begin supporting herself so that she can begin living the life that she has chosen. In the meantime, focus on yourself. Pick up a new hobby, join a club, mentor a child…

Dr. Ada, I'm an over thinker and its starting to affect my moods. Do you have any tips for keeping your thoughts steady and consistent?

-Joe Joe, Sounds like you may be dealing with anxiety. All of us experience anxiety at some point in our lives.

When you feel overwhelmed and distracted, there are several things that you can do to clear your head.

Try deep breathing or meditation, which actually physically effects the mind. Deep breathing helps to relax a major nerve that runs from the diaphragm to the brain, sending a message to the entire body to let go and loosen up. It is also important for you to get enough sleep, nourishment, and exercise. Eating a balanced diet of fruits and vegetables, lean proteins and whole grains helps with long-term energy, while exercise sends oxygen to every cell in your body, which helps your brain and body operate at its best.

Finally, allowing yourself to be distracted can definitely help. Try going to a movie, reading a book, or connecting with family or friends. When you spend time focusing on something outside of yourself, it often leaves you feeling recharged and with new perspective.

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Who’s That Girl …….

Iris P.

Interview By: Malcolm Armstrong Jr. Images Courtesy of : Green Team Agency 26

musicians, but I've noticed the more independent you are, the more you can see your errors because there is no one to blame but you.

CM: Describe the time you first heard your single on the air. What did you feel at the time?

IP: "Wow!" Was my first reaction when Wild Wayne spun "Issues" on the radio. I was tearing up because my vision came true! I felt blessed because I didn't imagine that feeling until it happened lol. I was truly overjoyed! That feeling made me want to embrace composing my music with true feelings, at first I was ashamed of my Issues" but since I've realized it's to show others that they are not alone, especially women!

CM: How did the death of your daughter’s father impact your music career?

CM: Who is the songstress we know as Iris P.?

IP: My daughter's father was my best friend; we IP: Iris p is a songstress that just wants to vent; to were high school and beyond sweethearts! When vent about relationships, being alone and finding he died I felt an empty space in my heart and mind. happiness.

I was very hurt and you could tell from my music at the time. I was recording songs that were CM: We hear the name Iris P. has a special meaning somewhat against the morals I have now. Life was just waking up in the morning trying to help my (speaking of acronym). Can you tell us about it? daughter smile but deep down I was drowning in IP: I.R.I.S. P. is an acronym for "I REACHED I SURVIVED" meaning the goal I'm reaching for will my own tears. I made a lot of sad songs. succeed, as long as I am still reaching.

CM: How did gospel influence your vocal career?

IP: Gospel influenced me heavily. I was born into gospel music, special thanks to my parents Keith Poree and the late Marilyn Etienne aka lady gospel. I sung in my mother's choir for church and I watched my mom rehearse her gospel songs before her shows. I always think about her saying "Jesus will never leave you." To this day I am a firm believer of that!

CM: What were some of your struggles establishing your music career in New Orleans?

IP: My struggle in New Orleans as a musician was very educational; meaning the situations I've experienced taught me a lot. I recorded a complete album and have yet to put it out. Since that struggle, I've learned to do as much as I can by myself. "Nothing in life is free" is what I’ve experienced here! There are many wonderful

CM: What did you do to motivate yourself and your family past the tragedy of his death?

IP: I didn't know what to do to motivate us so I joined Touch of Love ministries because the thought of going to the church where his funeral was and still is too much for me. I started to sing to the Lord more and I started asking for more guidance and It worked! My life feels smoother knowing God doesn't make mistakes. After realizing he was still here in my heart, things got better, way better; but not easier. Every day I still think of his smile. When I sing, I know he would be "buckin" for me lol.

CM: What do you think caused your music career to launch? We see you have been performing live a lot lately.

IP: God has launched my career I'm certain! Along with angels he sent on the way, such as EGMG and many dj’s, friends and supporters of new artist!

Wild27Wayne was the first to air my music and

channel 4 was my first TV interview to get the ball rollin'! Now, my credits are soaring!

From winning the NOLA HIP HOP AWARDS hottest female vocalist of 2012, I won't ever back down. I'm taking off slowly but surely, because I'm still reaching CM: Have you collaborated with other local artists and if so how was the experience(s)?

IP: Yes I have collaborated on over 100 songs since IRIS P. was born in 07. I've worked with many great artist and producers, too many to acknowledge but I love getting together with other artists to show how versatile I really am! I have learned music lasts forever, so some collabs I probably wouldn't be to hip on doing again lol...

I've changed my way of thinking so that has a lot to do with my music. So for the record, I don't do trap music anymore.

CM: What advice would you give to other aspiring music artists coming up in New Orleans?

IP: My advice to all new and upcoming artists would be to "be yourself.” Everybody may not like your music because everyone is not experiencing what you experience, but that doesn’t mean you aren’t great! Find what YOU love and stick with it no matter what!

CM: What are some of the latest projects you are currently working on?

IP: My current project “ISSUES” is going swell! My first video for the single “Issues” has been out for a year. The newly released “THE UNUSUAL” freestyle video with the Johnny Gill cover is blazing through the Internet as I introduce C.A.T. to the world. This month, December 2012, the highly anticipated Cfreedom footage of “FLY DUDE” will be released! “DON'T CARE,” my first official album will be in stores FEBRUARY 2013.

CM: How can we find out more about the lovely Iris P.? (Websites, booking info, social media etc.)

IP: @IRISPNEWORLEANS FACEBOOK-IRIS POREE INSTAGRAM-IRISPNEWORLEANS IRISPONLINE.com Booking: Info@GreenteamAgency.com

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 Smiling is easier than frowning.  Smiling is the universal sign or signal of happiness and it is a non verbal way to communicate with the people we interact with, is conveys feelings of happiness, trust, support, love, forgiveness, admiration, joy, content, and satisfaction.

 Smiling makes you feel better. When you are in a bad mood, going through the trials and tribulations of life or are feeling low smiling is an immediate way to boost your mood.

 Smiling makes people more attractive, so smiling could potentially get you more dates.

 Smiling improves your health, it relaxes your body which aids in healing and boosting of the immune system. Smiling also reduces blood pressure, and works out your facial muscles.

 Smiling helps fight depression. People that smile a lot tend to be happier than people that do not smile.

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Holiday Gift Guide 2013 Bronze Necklace with Swirl Detail Handmade in Mali and casted in beeswax this necklace will surely make her glow. www.greenserene.biz

$49 Putumayo World Music This assortment of cultural music will be good tunes to deck the halls to. www.greenserene.biz

$15.50

Yoga Pants by Alternative Apparel Pants made in this comfortable material will have you doing yoga nonstop. Available in Grey and Burgundy. www.greenserene.biz

Meditation Pillows by Barefoot Yoga Co. Start your new year meditations off with these comfy pillows. www.greenserene.biz

$38 $70 Assorted Handmade Bangles Be stylish with these bangles handmade in Mali. www.greenserene.biz

Putumayo Kids Coloring Books The kids will enjoy coloring in these books while learning about different cultures. www.greenserene.biz

$2 EACH

$9.95 30

Brasa Shadow Lantern This contemporary table top lantern produces heat with real yet safe flames.

Comes with lighter and extinguisher. Scent oils also available for $7.00. www.sprucenola.com

Cardboard Safari Various animal shapes available to put together and show off. Available in different animals and sizes www.sprucenola.com

$275

$30 - $62

$4

Kamal Greeting Cards Use these various greeting cards with a classic look to express your wishes this holiday season. www.sprucenola.com

504 Tees by Caitlyn S. The unique hand design on these shirts show NOLA heritage. Hurry up and rock these tees before everyone else does! www.caitlynstraymond.com Also available at Smoke on 4507 Magazine St.

$30

$90

Sucre Holiday Gift Box Santa won't disappoint with our Holiday Gift Box. Filled with a 15 piece Holiday Chocolate Collection, 15 piece Holiday Macaron Collection, Peppermint Drinking Chocolate, a Sucre 65 Chocolate Bar, and Homemade Vanilla Marshmallows. www.shopsucre.com

$59 Sucre Holiday Chocolate Collection + Holiday Macarons Discover true Holiday bliss with our 15 piece festive Mint Chocolate & Dark Truffle Collection paired with our 15 piece peppermint and chocolate flavored Holiday Macarons. www.shopsucre.com

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WHAT Blacks

Should Know…Battling the KEEPING AND BUILDING STRONG RELATIONSHIPS THROUGHOUT THE HOLIDAY SEASON

By: Suzanne Mayo– Theus, Ph.D.

T

Dr. Mayo-Theus is an Assistant Professor, Department of Child Development and Family Studies, in the College of Education and Human Development at Southern University at New Orleans. Dr. Mayo- is also the CEO of Mynette Management Company, a family consulting firm based in River Ridge, Louisiana and is the Volunteer Coordinator for Louisiana Saves. Suzanne Mayo-Theus is known around the world as a “dot connector” and a strategic planner who teaches and trains organizational leaders how to build coalitions in business, government, non-profit and educational arenas. Formerly, she has served as The National Director of Black America Saves; Executive Director of the Doug Williams Foundation; Assistant to the Director of The Congressional Black Caucus and a former Legislative Congressional Aide to U.S. Congressman Mervyn Dymally and U.S. Senator J. Bennett Johnston in Washington, D.C.

he holiday season can become a stress-filled time for families, work and for those who have to entertain family and friends. None of us can escape the new trends of “Black Friday” or “Cyber Monday” so we all must remind ourselves of the real meaning of Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years. The key to surviving the holiday season blues is to focus on yourself FIRST and plan ahead of the holiday season.

Having been through various holidays with major health problems facing me this article is written to help those of you who are beginning to stress over the mountain of tasks associated with these great and wonderful holidays. In case you have family members who will arrive in just a few days or weeks on your doorsteps, or the busy times associated with cooking and cleaning or the almighty task of purchasing items that we all probably do not need, but want during this holiday spending cycle, JUST HOLD ON. Here are just a few tips that might help each of us DE-STRESS for the upcoming holiday season:

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e ”Holiday Blues” Keeping and Building Strong Relationships During The Holidays:  Maintain your calmness always, do not get overwhelmed with anything.  Pre plan your dinner, cooking, your holiday parties and activities and your            

shopping.

Do not overspend on anything. If you cannot afford it ask others to pitch in.

Ask for help with the chores; Get the kids involved and that will keep them engaged and teach them to be involved in the holiday season activities.

Do not overact to the small things…take deep breaths 3 times a day (morning, noon and evening) and count to 5 before answering or responding to things that annoy you.

Forgive others including family for past problems and remember to forgive yourself throughout the holiday season that have happened. This tip will keep you grounded in the real meaning of the holiday season.

Enjoy the holiday season and write down 3 things you are thankful for.

If you will be alone for the holidays, call a close friend and tell them why you love them and write a letter to them thanking them for being in our life.

Keep yourself busy….do not allow yourself to get the holiday blues.

Watch a comedy or movie each day that you like. Go the library to check out a good movie each day during the holiday season…THEY ARE FREE! Remember, the holiday season is only about 5 weeks long. It will end soon.

SMILE each day and KEEP SMILING AND LAUGHING THROUGOUT THE HOLIDAY SEASON. This will build your immune system and your heart.

ENJOY THE HOLIDAY SEASON. FOCUS ON THE NEW YEAR and All that is ahead.

Trust me if your will practice these few tips throughout the holiday season, the time will pass quickly and peacefully and you will keep, build and maintain those relationships that are important in your life in 2012 and those will renewed in 2013. More especially you will not get the “Holiday Blues” and if you do…it will not stay with you long…I Promise. I want to hear from you on how you enjoyed the HOLIDAYS – BE BLESSED! Email your responses to: suzanne@mynettemanagmement.com 33

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THOUGHTS After

Dark

"Lusting" My mind is Full of lust Longing for the touch Of a man's hand on my back My hands grabbing his sac His hand grabbing my butt As he goes deeper to make me nut Bust all over his body I like to call him my "hot tottie" Because he make me bust all over like a shotty Thoughts race nightly Lust Wondering could I trust The next man I decide to sex Not to send out my nudes pics as a text Or when we make a movie He won't let any other guys view me In action Because I'm a hard worker Like most New Orleans girls, I'm a twerker Lusting For the opportunity to be on top Almost like a rocking chair the way I rock While on top I must Deal with this lust Should I suppress all of these feelings or should I let someone give me some sexual healing> decisions But not really too hard Because it's not like I'm some freak broad Although I'm lusting I'm not just going to go out and smash something There is no current And I'm not sexing exes So looks like I will just stop the fretting Worrying about relations And fellatio and cunnilingus tho It's back to the drawing board Time to think of other things when I get bored No more lusting Because in all actuality, I won't be smashing nothing!

F

or this edition of "Thoughts After Dark," I decided to post one of my poems from the upcoming book that I'm releasing.

The book, "Rejected Desirables" is a collection of poems done by myself and John Lacarbiere III. It deals with "Trying to be intimate with someone who's not intimate or maybe they're not into it... Just one of those friends without the benefits..."

This is just a sample of what's in the new book. "Rejected Desirables" is a collaboration with John Lacarbiere III. It will be released November 30. Order your copy here: http://www.amazon.com/Rejected-Desirables-JohnLacarbiere-III/dp/1479392359/ref=sr_1_1? ie=UTF8&qid=1354325421&sr=81&keywords=rejected+desirables

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BE Inspired

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By: Darrin L. Harris

enry David Thoreau once posed the question, “Why should we live with such hurry and waste of life?” To live mindfully, to appreciate your time, you have to move slowly. There’s nothing more difficult for humans, and we have progressively become worse as it relates to having patience. We have become a society where we must have everything fast, quick and in a hurry. We have been inundated with fast food, high speed internet and a host of get rich quick schemes.

Are we all immersed and engaged in such meaningless work that we can only feel important if we feel pressured? Here is where mindfulness comes in. You must pay attention to your speed and consciously slow down. In rushing, we have no time for reflection, no time to notice what is going on around us. As we approach a new year many of us will be challenged with making some very difficult decisions.

The decisions that we make could very well change the trajectory of our lives. I advise What is the addiction to stimulation? To be that you carefully and thoughtfully listen to truthful, sometimes I feel I am too addicted to that still small Voice. The Voice that is always my own adrenaline. If I’m not rushing, there speaking to us, telling us the right thing feeling pressured, I feel like I’m missing to do. Remember that haste makes waste. something. Is rushing the only way which we Slow down, take your time and do it right the can feel alive? Are we mistaking the rush of first time. espresso for a feeling of vitality? Does rushing make us feel like we are doing something important, that we are important?

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