The Quest is a BeCollaboration digital publication
Issue Eight 2018
KAY WESTRAP Spotlight on a key collaborator
GINA GARDINER
The theme of this issue is:
COMMUNITY
PAUL BAKER JEREMY CRISP GILL TINEY GAVIN PERRETT CAROL MAY
Published by BeCollaboration, 21 Victoria Road, Surbiton, Surrey, KT6 4JZ UK Issue 8, first published on 8th November 2018 All rights reserved. Copyright Š BeCollaboration and Contributors, 2018 While aligned to the vision and values of BeCollaboration, the views expressed here are soley those of the contributors and are not expressions of policy on behalf of the BeCollaboration leadership. To experience a BeCollaboration Community, be our guest and come to a meeting. Register at www.becollaboration.com/meetings/
For more details about The Quest and about BeCollaboration, visit our website at www.becollaboration.com. You can contact the team by writing to thequest@becollboaration.com, or to one of the contributors whose contact emails can be found at the end of their articles. The Quest is a publication platform open to members of BeCollaboration to contribute to major debates and issues of concern. Operating within the UK economy, and part of a global economic system, contributors to The Quest hold a big picture. They are personally involved with complex issues that require the skills and intent of many to solve. They are on a passionate, sometimes a life-long search, to secure change in the world and as such hold a great responsibility for benefitting future generations. BeCollaboration believes in working for a world where every individual has the opportunity to be the best they can be: where we are empowered to recognize and honour our ‘innate genius’, exploit our full potential and make our dreams real. We seek a world where business and work are designed to meet a Human need for respect, to be valued, to achieve and to contribute to others. Most of all we seek a world where everyone has the opportunity to have their voice. heard and make a positive difference to the planet and humanity. 2
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About our contributors Gina Gardiner Gina Gardiner is a #1 International Best-Selling Author, Motivational Speaker, Strategic Business and Empowerment Coach, with extensive experience of helping people achieve happiness and success. Supporting individuals to develop a greater sense of self–worth and develop confidence to step into their power, and business to become more profitable whilst caring for their people, is at the heart of her work. Gina is the creator of The Thriving Not Surviving Programme. She is passionate about helping her clients to achieve their full potential, and be genuinely, authentically their best self.
Paul Baker Paul is a consultant, trainer, coach, facilitator and therapist in Systemic Win. He is responsible for creating the name and is currently the main developer of its theory and practice. Paul believes that everyone needs to learn to stop being selfish and instead become increasingly systemically self-interested. He loves to have practical conversations with communities (it does not matter if the community is an individual or a group of individuals) about how we collaborate to make our own and each other’s lives better and better the longer we live and the more we do together (or apart).
Jeremy Crisp (Jez to his friends) grew up and still lives in south west London. A diverse career from Estate Agency to Recruitment with many stops in between he has always been a problem solver and spends his time helping others – including volunteering to support the local homeless community. With a background of research into software solutions he is now a specialist in the plethora of online platforms and SaaS solutions. He is currently developing an all-in-one Online Community and Social Communication and Collaboration Platform and so was a perfect choice to contribute to this issue of The Quest.
Gill Tiney Gill Tiney is the Co-Founder of BeCollaboration and is known for creating networks and communities using her unique style of coaching and communication skills to help people come together to achieve outstanding results. Having been in business for nearly 30 years she has experienced both bust and boom and knows from personal experience that we create our future. Part of her success stems from creating the right team around her, ensuring that anything is possible. As an author and speaker she has travelled the world sharing her philosophies and is passionate about making sure we give our next generation every opportunity to excel and be prepared for the changing world before them.
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Gavin Perrett Gavin is a Property Investment Consultant. He joined the financial services industry in early 1998 qualifying as a financial advisor and mortgage broker. Having developed a keen interest in the property sector Gavin has spent the last decade teaching clients how to develop property portfolios. Gavin’s passion is centred around the ongoing education and empowerment of his clients to identify their most compelling aspirations and then translate that into reality by investing in property. An effective networker, Gavin is also responsible for recruiting industry professionals into the business helping them to successfully diversify their client offering. Behind Gavin’s business lies a bedrock of personal development and education. A licensed Master Practitioner in NLP with applied Neuroscience the journey now continues on the path to International Coaching Federation accreditation.
Carol May Menopause Maven, Transformational Midlife Health Specialist, Coach, Speaker & BeCollaboration Accomplice. I work with women experiencing weight, health, work and relationship challenges as a result of the Menopause. I empower women to Power Through the Menopause with Ease, kick the mood swings, hot flushes & weight gain into touch, and embrace their changing body and lives with zestiness, sexiness and joy! I not only teach women how to support their body as it changes, but I also some essential skills to improve their relationships, to feel calmer, more energised and focused all the time, and help them develop emotional resilience.
Kay Westrap Kay Westrap has spent has spent much of her career in the IT field in Investment Banking. Alongside this, she has developed and built websites for over 10 years supporting and helping SME Businesses to grow. Her passion is also to help those with mental health issues. Multidisciplined, she uses techniques such TFT (Thought Field Therapy), NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) Hypnosis and Empowering Learning to enable her clients to unlock whatever is holding them back from experiencing true happiness. She is uniquely positioned to support collaboration in business from both the personal and professional perspective.
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Editorial Gill Tiney
Welcome to the 8th edition of The Quest the online publication brought to you by the BeCollaboration community. As a collaborative project our Digital Team have worked together to provide a platform for our Collaborators (members of our community) to share their thoughts, beliefs and knowledge with our readership. As our community grows and develops a culture predicated on love connection and abundance we are only too aware the power at our disposal when we share our skills and collaborate. It made perfect sense to base this issue around our concept of community and for our members to delve deeper into the purpose and potential of a fully functioning community. We are now familiar with online communities, with engagement being the symbol of success and the larger the community the more potential to monetise. Obviously, the cynical side of me would say this was predominantly the reason to build an online community, however Jeremy Crisp has a more altruistic view and blows my cynicism out of the water. Carol May illustrates the health benefits of belonging to a community, from supporting your immune system to alleviating stress and anxiety. Indeed, in my article I consider an epidemic of loneliness if we do not, as a society, work out how to come together off-line as well as on. We do not want to become a civilisation who only communicate via iPads or other mobile devices. Who hasn’t seen a family at a restaurant where children are being babysat by a device rather than integrate them into the conversation. Gavin Perrett delves into how communities can enhance business, isn’t it always preferable to buy from a company when you feel that you identify with the brand, maybe even follow them on Twitter or like them on Facebook, connect with others who also like their products. A loose community maybe, but an effective way to learn about the latest product or design. Paul Baker takes a look at the ultimate community in the form of System Win. An incredible concept he has been researching and working on for many years, here he briefly explains the power of working together as one. Pulling for mankind to adopt and utilise his belief system, not in a spiritual sense, but from the perspective of a powerful community pulling together for the good of mankind. The permutations are mind blowing. Finally, our featured Collaborator this month is Kay Westrap, a powerhouse behind the scenes at BeCollaboration, not only as part of The Quest team but one of the lead players of Engage our commercial proposition that utilises our community. (more of that on page 42) Add to that she is also our website wizard for both BeCollaboration and Engage, she is a key Collaborator and an all-round good egg. I’m sure you will agree when you find out what else she does in her spare time – and you thought you were busy!!! We know you will enjoy reading this edition, please share with your online and offline communities and we look forward to bringing you our Next Gen issue in the New Year when we will be looking into the future and identifying what the Millennials will have to look forward to. Best wishes Gill Tiney – Co – Founder of BeCollaboration 6
An anthropologist proposed a game to African tribe kids. He puts a basket full of fruit near a tree and told them that whoever got their first won sweet fruits. When he told them to run they all took each other’s hands and ran together, then sat together enjoying their treats. When he asked them why they had run like that as one could have had all the fruits for himself they said: UBUNTU, how can one of us be happy all the other ones are sad? UBUNTU in the Xhosa culture means: “I am because we are”
About The Quest Team The Quest is produced by the BeCollaboration Digital Team and is made possible by, you.
For her proofreading skills, many thanks to Linda Burns. lifeinsideout8@gmail.com
For marketing and communications, our huge thanks go to Scott Campbell of Affecting Peoples Lives scott@affectingpeopleslives.com
For creating and the maintenance of the website and the proofreading, a huge thanks to Kay Westrap. kay@couragetogrow.me.uk
For concept design, layout and art, our warmest gratitude to Angela Makepeace of Angela Makepeace Motion Graphics Studio info@angelamakepeace.co.uk For being a great technical lead, our huge respect to Simon Thomas of Toucan Internet LLP. simon@toucanweb.co.uk
Our warmest gratitute to Anne Gould, for her proofreading skills. isworkingwordzmedia@gmail.com For her driving force to bring the project to fruition, proofing and liaising with contributors, writing of editorial and case study and being our Team Dynamo we give huge thanks to Gill Tiney gill@becollaboration.com
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Lead article
Gina Gardiner
THE POWER OF COMMUNITY
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We live in an age where the sense of community feels diminished particularly in the Western World. People often live far from where they were born, families are fragmented by geography and their lives are complicated by the breakdown of relationships and the creation of new ones. The sense of community once created through faith and worship has become an irrelevance to many people today.
group. Survival was absolutely dependent on the collective taking responsibility for the whole community, and for the individuals within it. The clan worked together to ensure protection from predators or attack by rival clans. They hunted and gathered food together, child care and all the tasks of daily living were shared. Survival was impossible as an individual, the success of the community was absolutely dependent on group co-operation. Rejection Research has demonstrated that many people from the clan meant almost certain death. who live in urban settings feel isolated and lonely, despite living in close proximity to I believe the need to belong to a group is hotothers. The result? People feel unseen and wired into our very core. In my experience unheard, they believe they don’t belong or people have a huge fear of rejection, of being an matter. outsider. As a result, they will often do anything to fit in and please. Feelings of rejection and It is has a profound impact on their emotional isolation lead to anxiety, depression and wellbeing and mental health and is one of the hopelessness. major contributors to the growing number of people who are depressed. The NHS report For early man, belonging was dependent on that currently over 50% of the prescriptions being the same as the rest of the group. Those filled in the UK are for anti-depressants. who were seen to be different in any significant way, were seen as an outsider. They were Happiness surveys show that a significant seen as a threat to survival. It is this element of percentage of the population in the Western belonging to a community which continues to World report lower levels of happiness than divide many people today. those living in communities in the Developing World. It is only when we can see ourselves as being part of the human community where everyone Why is it that those who have very little in the is valued no matter what their colour, ethnicity, way of material wealth feel happier? What is sexual orientation or disability will there be it that makes the difference? I believe one of peace and harmony. the most pertinent reasons why the difference is so stark, is that the people who express Being part of a community is just as important the highest levels of happiness, live in close as it has ever been, I believe in many ways knit communities where they feel they are it is even more important. Where there is a supported and valued. Where they feel they sense of community people feel that they belong. belong, it engenders a sense of being valued and supported, and this has a hugely positive Humans are in essence, group animals. Much of impact on an individual’s self-worth and the conditioning which kept our ancestors safe, confidence. was based on the need to belong to a cohesive Join the discussion...
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“I believe at its best, a community is group of people who share the same core values. Where the individuals have a sense of self,”
it that many people are drawn into being a So, what does being part of a community community because of tragedy or hardship? mean? How can we create the very best elements of being a community at less troubling times and I believe at its best, a community is group ensure that the people within it feel valued, of people who share the same core values. without creating a sense of separatism and Where the individuals have a sense of self, suspicion of those who are not an active part but also identify with the collective, and are of the community? prepared to contribute time and effort to help each individual and the community thrive. A BeCollaboration offers an excellent example community is stronger than the sum of its parts. of a community which does just that. As a It is a place where people value one another new member, I have been struck by the way for their strengths, contributions and potential in which core values are explored together but where they also appreciate one another’s by the community. Different perspectives are vulnerabilities. encouraged and explored, and as a result there is a clear, explicit understanding of what As a group, they are able to support one the community deems to be important. The another through the ups and downs of life, group I attended embraced diversity and celebrating the highs, and are able to come supported co-operation via the structure of together to minimise the impact of the lows. the meeting. Members were actively invited Sharing is an important factor – that may be to offer expertise and support to those within around material things, but just as importantly the group. There was also a strong sense that sharing the aspirations, laughter, tears, fears, the community wanted to embrace others who memories and celebrations. Planning the wanted to succeed in business, but to do that future, making dreams a reality as a community, with real heart. brings with it the opportunity to tap in to the collective experience, skills, expertise and Care, compassion, positive and constructive enthusiasms. The elders have much to offer challenge, encouragement and support within those who lack experience and expertise, the a group built on mutual trust and respect, are at youngsters contribute their aspirations, energy the heart of a great community. It is important and enthusiasm. that people are able to hold differing views and beliefs without fear, where the difficult What is it that brings a collection of different issues can be explored and solutions found – people into a cohesive community? Why is together. 10
We live at a time when unhappiness and a sense of “Is this it?” appear to be at an alltime high, and many of the Clients I meet are feeling lost. Lack of self-esteem appears to have reached epidemic proportions, which in turn is having a negative effect, not only on the individual’s quality of life, but in their relationships, both personal and professional. I believe our physical and mental health are greatly influenced by our emotional and spiritual wellbeing. I’m passionate about helping people develop self-confidence and a great relationship with themselves and others. Helping people recognise that they ‘are enough’ and that they have the power to make choices, is at the heart of my work. I am passionate about helping people recognise that they have the choice to be happy, to be successful and to live a life full of joy and fulfilment. To help them recognise that they are not broken, that they are enough
and to help them access their inner resources to live life fearlessly. I believe my life’s purpose is to be of service. We live in incredibly troubled times. Difference and a sense of separation are constantly reported in the media. Many people live in a state of constant fear, which leads to a great deal of stress, unhappiness and depression. This in turn leads to an ever-greater sense of isolation. I believe it is incredibly important to recognise that we are all connected, to look at how we can support and help one another, from a place of love, and for people to step into their genuine, authentic power. You can contact Gina at: www.ginagardiner.com
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What are the BeCollaboration meetings all about? We are a community of motivated and passionate people who choose to work closely together so we can make a positive impact on businesses, organisations and the lives of individuals we work with. People get involved with BeCollaboration for the buzz of being part of something larger than themselves. They want to be able to fulfil their dreams and ambitions with a team of collaborators who are as passionate as they are, and share the same goals. Collaboration creates empowerment for personal, professional and philanthropic growth. In short, we are up for changing the world. Fancy a bit of that? You can see a little more about the whole BeCollaboration approach to life and business here: www.becollaboration.com/our-vision
Details of all our meetings are on our website: www.BeCollaboration.com
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Paul Baker
COMMUNITY, SYSTEMIC WIN AND COLLABORATION PRINCIPLES AND PROCEDURES FOR LIVING THE LIFE YOU WANT TO LIVE IN THE WORLD YOU WANT TO LIVE IN
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He looked at me and I could see love shining in they do not have a name for either. Systemic his eyes. He said, “Will you help me make your Win is the general thing that everyone always wants that is behind whatever it is that they world a better place?” specifically want in the moment. It is the best I did not know what to say or do. He continued; thing you could ever get and, unlike ice-cream, “I want your world to become better and better the more you get, the more you want AND the the longer you live. Is that something you better it is for you!” want?” “Systemic Win is the true game of life and the I nodded dumbly, realising that I did not know simple rule for playing Systemic Win is to react how to have this sort of conversation, my social well not badly. I will repeat that, you must react well enough that your following reaction is skills did not cover how to participate. better and the ones after that are even better “Of course,”, said he matter of factly, “if you until you die (and if you can, it is still a good want to live well you also need to be ready to idea to continue reacting well even after you die well because no one knows when they are die). going to die, but it is absolutely certain that your body will die sooner or later. Do you want Something happens in my environment and to be more and more peaceful about dying the the way I react to it makes things better for me, better for you and overall our environment longer you live?” improves. You react well to this happening in What he was saying made sense, but you your environment and it makes things better for just don’t have this sort of conversation with you, better for me and overall our environment improves. The result is that things get better someone you don’t know. and better. It is different from “Win / Win” in that “There is almost no one I know who talks the wellbeing of the context, the community about these issues with the people they know and the environment is as important as your and care deeply about, or with strangers for and my wellbeing.” that matter”, he added. “You have not said anything yet; do you want to collaborate with “Have you got any questions or comments, or me to create a Systemic Win world in your shall I keep talking? I have got plenty to say, so I will continue until you interrupt me, if that is communities?” ok with you?” I nod my head, half smiling half What is Systemic Win, what does he want from frowning, there is a lot to take in and it seems really important. me? What communities is he talking about? “Most people have not heard about Systemic “Systemic Win is what everyone always wants, Win, but when I describe it they discover that but the other side of the coin is what everyone they know all about it and Systemic Lose, but always and, in all circumstances, wants to avoid, Join the discussion...
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“Systemic Win is what everyone always wants, but the other side of the coin is what everyone always and, in all circumstances, wants to avoid, wants not to have..” wants not to have. Can you imagine anything starting here and now, so I ask him to keep worse than what I am about to describe in talking. principle? “Without community, there is no life and Something happens, and I react badly to it without life in its simplest form, the cell, there is and I make things worse for me, it also makes no community. The cell was where community things worse for you. The result is that our began, and it was also where Systemic Win environment and what is in it deteriorate. You had its origins. then react badly making things worse for you, worse for me and our environment deteriorates When the first cell reproduced itself that further, others start (and continue) reacting was the beginning of the game of life and it badly and things individually and systemically is a “positive non-zero-sum game” despite get worse – “Systemic Lose”. science, mathematics and most belief systems and religions being based on everything be a Can you imagine any circumstance in which zero-sum game or moving towards entropy you want to be in, or even near, Systemic Lose? and “steady state Systemic Lose is “Hell on Earth” (or anywhere else) while Systemic Win is “Heaven on Earth” and both are easily available right now starting with your next reaction”
It is important to talk about this because competition is part of life and winning is almost always better than losing (unless I win the battle and lose the war or campaign).”
He cast me a sideways glance
He continued
“I really could do with a reaction from you. Do you want to collaborate with me to make the communities in our worlds better and better the longer we participate in them? Which part of which community should we start with as far as you are concerned? What part of the community of you is not reacting as well as it needs to and is creating Systemic Lose or some other form of “Non-Systemic Win” rather than Systemic Win?” What does he mean by the “community of me”? He seems to know and understand a lot and I want to know how to improve my world
“According to the scientists at one point there was no life and then, in a way that no one has any sort of sensible explanation for, life started, and it has never stopped growing, expanding and becoming more and more complex. By a very large margin, the most complex thing yet found anywhere in the universe is the human brain. For there to be enough life for life to continue to reproduce itself and develop more life has to be created than can reach its full potential. If you are a gardener, you have to plan to grow 16
more than you need because not everything That is my dilemma, a solution to our woes, will grow as you hope. an answer to the self-destruct path we are currently on, and a passion to share and teach The rule is that if you want to have enough in everyone how to implement it into their lives. exceptional and difficult circumstances, you In doing so the Systemic Win propels itself to have to produce what will be too much in those we know and so on, until everyone is ordinary circumstances. What do you do with affected. the too much in the ordinary circumstances? In the living world the solution is; eat it. It is a simple concept, but not so easy to grasp. Here is another explanation. Life works by living things eating other living things or living things that have died. Everything The cell and community. routinely produces more than enough, and something eats the more than enough in order At the top left of the diagram is a very simplified to produce yet more, more than enough. version of the essence of community. There are parts (self, other and another or others) in This is why we are at a time of greater potential a context or an environment with a boundary that at any time in history and the potential is around them that is semi-permeable. Those increasing rapidly. The quantity and complexity parts with a boundary make up a whole. Each of life is increasing and there is no turning whole is also a part of something bigger (a back.� greater whole). Each part is also a whole, a lesser whole. The parts become smaller than But how does this affect us and Systemic Win? can be conceived and the great wholes larger I asked. than could be imagined and in the middle is the whole that we can deal with partly or part “We have never had so great a potential for of. things to go wrong (climate change, nuclear war, plastic pollution, financial meltdown, etc, In the diagram every arrow is an interaction etc). At the same time, we have never had such and a reaction that is better or worse and will an extraordinary potential for things to go well start to create the local conditions that make and for everyone to live good lives and in the either Systemic Win or Systemic Lose more fullness of time die good deaths. likely locally. We are living on an ever-sharper knife edge between Systemic Win and Systemic Lose and choosing Systemic Win becomes ever more important.�
I want to begin to make the diagram three dimensional in a very particular way. Consider a coin. What it is and what it looks like changes depending on where you look at it from.
His passion for the solution to our world self- I have significant expertise in field of conflict combusting was clear, he knew he had the resolution and one of the recurring difficulties solution. Now he had to find a way to share it. that people have is becoming upset and Join the discussion...
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How does looking at one side tell you the truth of the other side?
disturbed by the way that the other side are describing the part of the coin they see because it seems to be a threat to the truth of what they are seeing and experiencing.
A small step for each of us is to spot when we are reacting in a negative way (Systemic Lose) and in the moment change to create a positive reaction (Systemic Win) Try it out for a week – or even a day and let me know how it Being upset by the way someone is describing has impacted your view and experience of the something they can see, and you can’t see, is a world. Every change in our world starts with very significant way of reacting badly to what is YOU and ME. happening in part of your environment. You can contact Paul at: In summary; paul@paulbakerandcompany.co.uk If we collaborate, which is at the heart of our nature, we can together create more and more amazing communities of communities in ever richer environments. We can compete and collaborate to create ever more wonderfulness in the environments, world and worlds in and around us. All we have to do is in the moment help each other react well enough now to react better next, and better still later on. To do this we need each other’s feedback about the environmental and systemic impact of our present and likely behaviour. Join the discussion...
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Jeremy Crisp
COMMUNITIES - SHARING TALENT, TRADING, AND THE KNOWLEDGE TREASURE MAP
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Wow! Where to start? It’s such a big topic that includes all of us, affects and shapes us all; from the world at large, to our friends, families, colleagues, and even strangers. Communities abound in local government, within health care and emergency services, businesses and the employers they serve. But they also exist in the environment we grew up in, the knowledge we pass to the next generation and the world of tomorrow. I am but one of billions of people who co-exist on this planet that we all call home. Everyone is unique in their own experiences, and the environments and communities that we live in, and the people we interact with, yet we are one and the same. We all need food to eat, water to drink, oxygen to breathe, warmth and shelter. The Question is - Do we need really one another? What is community? Is community really that important? And if so, why? The world around Us Look around your office or home and what do you see? A wall, laptop, mobile phone, window, bicycle, bus, plane? What do you do in the morning? Take a shower, put toothpaste on your toothbrush, have cereal, a cup of tea or coffee?
learning, teaching, collaborating, energies, and gifts and knowledge passed down to us by a thousand generations. All this would not have been possible or ever existed had it not been for our ancestors working together for the greater good. Gifts poured out for one another and knowledge shared, one on top of the other, year upon year, an accumulated knowledge honey pot and mountain of sweat, and tears, laughter and love. Being part of a community is a basic human need. It is impossible to violate this need and thrive. As you observe nature in its entirety, you start seeing a very complex interdependence and inter-connectivity. Even plants and animals thrive in communities. Can you imagine living on a farm on your own, planting grain, harvesting it, drying it, grinding it, baking bread and eating it all by yourself? Isolation is destructive, but together we thrive! Today in the 21st century we have online communities. All have been mapped by the experience of building and growing communities from the past. We now have access to more information and knowledge than at any other time in history. With computers now enabled by artificial intelligence teaching themselves how to learn and adapt for our benefit, our knowledge base is now exponential. Personal Spatial Awareness
These things didn’t just appear from nowhere. They all were produced by the earth’s resources. Painstakingly created or cooked, or shipped, then sold. A chain made up of people working together in teams, with machines that were also all created by someone else, and so it goes on, and on. This is the result of the
Spatial Awareness (or Intelligence) helps us to interpret the world around us, enabling us to make qualified wise decisions to be able to navigate our way through life and the world around us.
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“All this would not have been possible or ever existed had it not been for our ancestors working together for the greater good.” Spatial information has always been gathered by our bodies in electronic sensory waves that we receive through our five senses of sight, hearing, touch, taste and smell. This captured sensory information data is then sent directly to our body’s brains for processing. This is what it looks like
Digital Knowledge Maps
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Asset-Based Community Development
Knowledge Management/KM, Knowledge Base, Wiki etc, are best described as your Digital Library. The aim being to gather, categorise, record, store, and then allocate different permission levels to people in your team, group, business to access or they can be Spatial Life Awareness Knowledge Map Input for your customers, partners, affiliates or even Process: general public via your website.
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Analysed - to establish what type of information it is Categorised - by matching it against other pre-existing relevantly named information data Filed – into our brain’s knowledge library Connected – to our brains spatial knowledge map which has been in ongoing development since the day of our conception (and possibly even before if you take into consideration our DNA)
The core idea of Asset-Based Community Development is that rather than begin by defining people and communities by their • deficits and trying to fix them, you find their • assets (experience, knowledge, skills, talents, passions, and relationships) and engage them. It is a place-based strategy that recognizes that people don’t always need programs and institutions to serve them, and often can achieve more working together with neighbours and Spatial Life Awareness Knowledge Map families to solve problems and strengthen Output Process: their communities. Wise decision making is based on our preexisting spatial understanding according to our Life’s Spatial Awareness Knowledge Map. This information has always come to us via the medium of communities, group speak, common sense, word of mouth, handed down from father to son.
Solving community problems takes people not just programs. Professional Communities:
Focus of sharing knowledge and resources, skills and talent, to help build Knowledge Maps, collaborating with others, creating So too is the information being gathered in partnerships, supporting and working together our digital world. We now have the ability for the greater good of all, as together we to replicate and speed up this evolutionary are better and stronger. Technology enables system with technology. us to build knowledge-based communities 22
“When I share this example of collaboration, I seem to gain wholehearted agreement that it clearly demonstrates a better way.”
across the world for the benefit of mankind. Conversely there will always be the dark side and the criminal underworld is not far below the surface.
Perhaps one solution would be an all-in-one Online Community and Social Communication and Collaboration Platform, independently hosted, for niche industry or special interest groups creating harmonious ‘focused space’, where you are guaranteed to meet fellow professionals, organisations, and collaborators. Together you could curate and build and scale up your own knowledge library of relevant, specialist skills and resources, shared for easy visibility and simple information access, that is cost effective and completely connected, for the greater good of all.
The evil that occurs is also down to the seeming invisibility of the users, the trolls who cyber bully and stalk pushing people to suicide in the extreme. Even innocuous Facebook likes, deliver a dopamine boost that creates addiction, which in turn leads to compulsive destructive behaviour. Can the ‘community’ online deliver the same support and comfort than an offline one can. I cannot imagine an online AA (Alcoholics Anonymous) being as Whatever happens going forward in the tech effective as an offline, in person, face to face, world, no matter how valuable an online within hugging support distance one. community will be, it can never take the place of real flesh and blood face to face community. People are losing faith in the social network Whether it be your local church, Women’s giants due to algorithms tracking our every Institute, football club or family. Find your move and selling our personal information, and community, value it, contribute and watch the the constant bombardment people receive rewards flow. from recruiters, sales and marketers and irrelevant or unwanted connection requests. You can contact Jeremy at: So, is the online community a digital phase? Jeremy.crisp@mapcareers.com Do we trust the ‘communities’ we join that are thinly veiled sales vehicles? The concept is still a good one. Offer a place for like-minded people to meet online, share stories, knowledge, support and help each other just like an offline community would. Join the discussion...
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Our main aim in BeCollaboration is to bring people together, face to face, in a community where we share values, grow together and are aligned, to create projects and events that will have a lasting impact to improve our world. Logistically it is not possible for everyone to physically get to a meeting (yet) and so we have developed the next best thing. Being in an online community with all of the same BeCollaboration ethos you can now access the same magic, connect with incredible BeCollaboration members and get the same generous spirit from our online community. Follow the link Join the Platform to become a member. There you will find articles, videos, discussions and information to help you in your business and your life. Learn from the community, share your knowledge, support and help others, near and far. Plus discover those who are aligned and are nearby to you, where there are events close by – or worth travelling to. Invite your friends in, no matter where they are in the world. The common denominator? Being passionate about making a difference to others and working in your genius, your flow, to make it happen. Discover others who share your passion and create something together – Together we are stronger. What could you achieve if you had others to help you? Come and find them on the BeCollaboration platform. If you are a fan of the movie The Matrix you will remember a clip where Morpheus ask Neo if he wants to take the red pill or the blue pill‌. Take the red pill and discover a new world of love, connection and abundance in BeCollaboration. See you on the other side.
The BeCollaboration Platform
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Gill Tiney
COMMUNITY – THE RISE AND FALL AND RISE AGAIN OF THE COMMUNITY
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“Where did the camaraderie go? When did we start to become more independent, less needy of our neighbours and more solitary?.”
When I was a kid, my Nan lived across the road with my Great Aunt. Further up the road was my Uncle and Aunt with my cousins. We would regularly play with .The neighbours either side of us were called Auntie and we would often pop in to play. It was a long road in the East End of London, but we could name practically every one of our 60 or so neighbours. It was a community in good times and bad. Street parties were things of legend, and when someone was in trouble we all rallied round. That is how I thought everyone lived. Times change, and now as an adult I know maybe a handful of people who live down my street, and that is not for want of trying. Granted, it is no longer the East End of London, we have moved to the leafy suburbs of the home counties, where I would have hoped community still thrived, but sadly that is not the case. I don’t have young children which makes it so easy to make friends, if I grow old here, I wonder what help might be forthcoming should I need it.
a state of mind that was to pull together, waste not want not, help those who could not help themselves. Where did the camaraderie go? When did we start to become more independent, less needy of our neighbours and more solitary? Was it the new world that was emerging? Change that we had fought so hard not to have – keeping the home fires burning, so our boys could return and continue where they had left off, and yet inevitably it was happening as sure as time marched on. Or maybe it was later when the Thatcher years took their toll and the Yuppie generation was born – success at any cost, what’s in it for me, look out for number one. Community as we knew it was dying. People were moving further away from their families, some even as far as Australia. Travel was becoming easier, it became the norm not to live in the same street that you grew up in. To move away from family. Communication became easier, I remember the day we had our first telephone INSIDE THE HOUSE!!!! I was nine years old.
What has changed? I was born in 1963, still in the shadow of the 2nd World War less than 20 years since it had finished, but still fresh and in living recent memory. A community mentality still prevailed,
There was community too in the workplace. We stayed employed in the same company for decades, it was like a second family, if you were lucky enough to have a good boss. Now Generation X are looking to move their 28
career on after two or three years, they see themselves as becoming stale if they aren’t seen to progress. Indeed, many do not even have permanent contracts. Is this a direct result of the capitalist mindset that has been so insidious in our societies for so long we take it as the norm – always looking to generate and expand. Totally against the ‘waste not want not’ view of our parent’s generation.
from home as one that inevitably is bad for our health.
Across millennia we have evidence that communities were how civilisations survived. From the ancient Egyptians, Romans to the Vikings they have all offered evidence that the village that worked together thrived together.
An epidemic of loneliness will bring social illness such as anxiety, depression and with a growing sedentary lifestyle, obesity, high blood pressure, heart disease and cancers. Not a pretty picture for the 21st century.
When Lynda Gratton wrote ‘The Shift’ she extrapolated the future of work and what it would look like now we have the internet to allow us freedom from the ubiquitous office. It is not an inviting prospect. In fact, she warns against the isolating experience of working
But we have religion to save us and create communities, don’t we?
Imagine, as she does in her book, that you work from home with no need to connect with another human apart from via your laptop. With groceries delivered, TV as entertainment, exercise via an app and neighbours shut away in similar circumstances behind closed doors, coming home from work is a matter of closing How can community exist let alone survive the lid on your laptop and the realisation that you are lonely. under these circumstances?
Well, if you adhere to the philosophy of Clare Graves and Don Beck they demonstrate through the Spiral Dynamics model that we are
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“We all want to belong. We want the world to shine from the love that can be shared with every human on the planet, we are all capable of more.”
moving away from organised religion. People don’t like being told what to believe. They want to find out for themselves how to behave within their own spirituality and not to follow a doctrine developed hundreds if not thousands of years ago. So, while there are pockets of religion, the communities we are told are ever decreasing and as we know, every religion is currently suffering ridicule from one area or another – again an effect of the internet bringing us instantaneous news. In some cases, it’s a good thing, as for example in the case of uncovering child abuse. However, when you witness the vitriol hurled at innocent victims via social media one cannot help but wonder why these people are so angry and vehement over an innocent comment or remark. Perhaps they have been home alone for too long and need to vent to remind themselves they are alive.
satisfy you, but even those people want to be serving a purpose, knitting squares for blankets to go to refugees. Whatever you find to fill your soul you should embrace it. Whether it is a self-help group, common interest group, sports club, and indeed a church, mosque, synagogue or temple all will embrace the community ethos of acceptance. That is basically all we ever yearn for while on this planet – to be accepted by our peers.
At BeCollaboration we are building a community. We understand its power as Margaret Mead says ‘to change the world’ and our culture is predicated on our ability to move from living in a paradigm based on fear, scarcity and competition to one of love, connection and abundance. As we meet – in the flesh, not online, for a monthly get together (although some people come to as many So, what of the future of the community? meetings as they can cram into a month) we work on ourselves to ‘be the best me’ and As Margaret Mead anthropologist declared we support each other in whatever project or ‘Never doubt that a small group of committed passion we feel drawn to. citizens can change the world, indeed it is the only thing that ever has’. By appreciating that we are all Human BEings and accepting that we are all a work in Our innate being yearns for connection. We are progress our community bonds over shared social beings, for our own sanity and wellness sadness from the past and creates joy for the we need to be part of something bigger than future. There is no religion at play, but faith is us. Being a member of the knitting circle might boundless in whatever deity you choose or 30
chooses you. What it might be – The Shift We all want to belong. We want the world to shine from the love that can be shared with every human on the planet, we are all capable of more. Simply existing from one weekend to the next, stupefied by TV and sugar-laden processed ready-made meals, disagreements with family stretching into years of not communicating and terminal visits to the doctor for what ails you – when all you need is someone to talk to.
How BeColl can make the difference. You can contact Gill at: gill@becollaboration.com
The power of humanity is within our grasp, we can cure depression, we can make joy your default setting, when you are part of a community that is focused on love. What do YOU want to achieve? Everything is possible when you collaborate in a like hearted community. What it is now – Capitalism Join the discussion...
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Gavin Perrett
IS COMMUNITY ESSENTIAL FOR YOUR BUSINESS?
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What does the word community mean to you? the fact that we as humans are social animals. Do you hold it as value or a word lost in a leaflet It is inherent within our nature to operate and in a GP surgery, hospital or library? function within a herding or pack mentality. Perhaps the most helpful place to start is for us to define the word community so that the context of the content to follow is on the right track. The dictionary definition is as follows: community kəˈmjuˈnˈti/ noun 1. a group of people living in the same place or having a particular characteristic in common. “Montreal’s Italian community” synonyms: group, section, body, company, set, circle, clique, coterie, ring, band, faction; More 2. the condition of sharing or having certain attitudes and interests in common. “the sense of community that organized religion can provide” I find these definitions interesting. The first makes me think of a community that has evolved naturally and organically possibly driven by culture, birthplace and geographical location
We need connection and interaction arguably to survive. This all begins in early childhood where we are completely dependent on our parents to survive as they feed and clothe us and protect us from threat. This develops as we get older and go to nursery and school, mixing with our peers and forming our own personalities and degrees of engagement within our early community. Sadly, this is also where prejudices and fears are learned; our communities shape our opinions and our sense of wanting and needing to fit in can sometimes usher us into an opinion base which doesn’t perhaps feel very comfortable. This is called a values conflict and the challenge here is whether the pain of not fitting in is graver than the discomfort of a values conflict. A perfect example here is when a group of children bully a child that doesn’t fit into any particular group or community at school. Every group of bullies has a ring leader and the bigger the group the more chance there is that there will be one or more children on the periphery of that group who is uncomfortable with the behaviour of the group towards the more vulnerable child being bullied. It is at this point that the values conflict is at its strongest and it’s interesting to then monitor the decision-making process and the driver behind those decisions. Essentially it comes down to what is causing more pain.
The second elicits a context of religious, Admittedly we vary as individuals and as business or political alignment. an introverted extrovert, I oscillate between enjoying social interaction and recharging my Now of course there can be overlaps where battery in my own solitude both definitions are comfortably married together and equally the second definition can The need for an introverted extrovert to be hidden deep within the context of the first spend time on their own to recharge honours meaning. and respects the relationships across all our communities as we recognise the need At this stage I think it’s important to acknowledge to recover. We then spend time with our Join the discussion...
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“There is something hugely refreshing about a salesman or business owner acting with sufficient humility to sacrifice profit for the benefit of a client.”
communities refreshed and ready to add highly visible community. Every business to one value, inspire and contribute. degree or another relies heavily on reputation, in order for their business to flourish. In the Is community essential for your business? current age of social media, online reviews and accountability reputation has never been Community forms the lifeblood of my business; more critical. All it takes is one negative Google indeed, my networking style on a Business to review to cast a shadow or question mark on Business basis is to get to know the person an otherwise unblemished record. Arguably before the business. It is also arguably a useful this is an inevitable growing pain of a thriving strategy in the Business to Consumer sector and successful business with increased as well. Get to know your client and them to exposure to a larger part of the general public know you so that you maximise your rapport community. There is also an opportunity in this and glean at an early stage what their likes scenario to demonstrate to your prospective and dislikes are. What are their fears and clients that life isn’t perfect and sometimes anxieties, their hopes and dreams? Are the two mistakes are made, however it is down to how of you a good fit business-wise? Do you both they are handled which determines the grit, share the same values? There’s no point after character and compassion of a business. all, trying to fit a square peg in a round hole. Is there perhaps somebody else within your The main point here though is that when trusted industry community that may suit that your business is immersed into the local prospective client better than you? There is community, there is an expectation that we something hugely refreshing about a salesman all behave with integrity. After all, if we wish to or business owner acting with sufficient humility enjoy the longevity of trust within our business to sacrifice profit for the benefit of a client. communities then integrity is a vital component What comes around goes around though as for success. Many friendships are also born out that client will be grateful for being directed of exposures to business communities so there into a more congruent sales process. If that is even more at stake than business reputation. client was referred by an existing client, then So, on balance we can comfortably assume it’s brownie points even if a slight delay in the that there is a base level of trust and reliability profit cycle. that a prospective client can take solace from. There is also an underlying and often unspoken So, this then begs the question! Do we relevance to businesses operating within a engineer our own communities to satisfy our 34
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“Building a community is a powerful experience, it takes you into areas you never anticipated and it builds you up in a way you weren’t aware you needed building up.”
own needs? Do we create our communities to serve ourselves? After all, Tony Robbins encourages us to surround ourselves with those who add value to our lives. Our peer group sets a standard and it is said that we are the sum of the five people that we spend the most time with. There is nothing contrived about being the architect of your community, as long as the foundations are not being laid upon a sand bed of conflicting values. The Trust Industry – we need to be visible on a constant ongoing basis for our clients to feel reassured that we are going to be around long enough to fulfil our commitments to them. Participating in the local community is an excellent way to achieve this visibility and it works well. Once again, social media has a significant part to play in achieving this.
and my cousins, uncles, aunties etc I am awash with nostalgia, reminiscing about the “good old days”. Likewise, my friends are everything to me. I have many “communities” of friends; some of them are completely separate and some of them overlap. My favourite example is my community of friends who share the common interest of music. We go to concerts and gigs together watching and listening to our favourite artists and bands. Interestingly we all say the same thing about our music community and that is that it’s like an escape from the pressures and stresses of work, business and sometimes family life. Some of us even shield this particular community from infiltration by “other” friends from “outside” because perhaps we are afraid of losing some of what made the group so special in the first place. It’s fascinating…
Is community important for your own fun factor? Building a community is a powerful experience, it takes you into areas you never anticipated Spending time with likeminded people, no and it builds you up in a way you weren’t aware egos to worry about, fun and laughter, love and you needed building up. This is what makes connection. What’s not to like about all of this? BeCollaboration so special because that is exactly what it’s done for me. A group of like My family community is incredibly important to hearted as well as like-minded people, we me. Even now at the age of 44 when I visit my bond over our shared culture to support and parents’ house I feel safe. I feel safe because it’s help each other and make a difference for the “home”; the house that my brother and I were wider community of human kind. brought up in and my parents still live there to this day. No matter what challenges present You can contact Gavin at: themselves to me in adult life, I feel safe and protected in this environment. Whenever we gavin@hawkhurstai.com have get togethers with my immediate family 36
Carol May
CONNECT AND THRIVE SOCIAL CONNECTION IMPROVES HEALTH, WELL-BEING & LONGEVITY.
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We all know the basics of health: eat your veggies, go to the gym and get proper rest. But how many of us know, that social connection is as important for our physical health and psychological wellbeing? A study as far back as 1988 showed that a lack of social connection has a greater impact on our health than obesity, smoking and high blood pressure.
claimed to have in 1985, was only three. In 2004 it had dropped to one, with 25% of Americans saying that they have no one to confide in. This decline in social connectedness may explain reported increases in loneliness, isolation, and alienation and may be why studies are finding that loneliness represents one of the leading reasons people seek psychological support.
Social connection strengthens our immune system (research by Steve Cole, a Professor of Medicine and Psychiatry and Biobehavioral Sciences in the UCLA School of Medicine) shows that genes impacted by social connection also code for immune function and inflammation, helps us recover from disease faster, and may even lengthen our lives significantly.
We all have a basic need for love and emotional connection. When we receive these, we feel worthy and lovable. Many of us grow up without these needs being adequately met. This lack of connection can have far-reaching physical and psychological consequences for us. (For extensive research on these consequences, see Why Love Matters by Sue Gerhardt.)
People who feel more connected to themselves and to others also experience lower rates of anxiety and depression. Moreover, studies show they also have higher self-esteem, are more empathic to others, more trusting and cooperative and, as a consequence, others are more open to trusting and cooperating with them. Social connectedness therefore generates a positive feedback loop of social, emotional and physical well-being. Unfortunately, the opposite is also true for those who lack social connectedness. Low social connection has been generally associated with declines in physical and psychological health as well as a higher propensity to antisocial behavior that leads to further isolation.
Why Do We Need Connections?
Despite its clear importance for health and survival, sociological research suggests that social connectedness is waning at an alarming rate in the West. A revealing social study showed that the modal number of close confidantes (i.e. people with whom one feels comfortable sharing a personal problem) Americans
Not experiencing loving connection as a child can lead to feeling a deep yearning in adulthood. To quote Brene Brown, Professor at the University of Houston Graduate College of Social Work and who specializes in social connection. “A deep sense of love and belonging is an irresistible need of all people. We are biologically, cognitively, physically, and spiritually wired to love, to be loved, and to belong. When those needs are not met, we don’t function as we were meant to. We break. We fall apart. We numb. We ache. We hurt others. We get sick.� We are profoundly social creatures. We may think we want money, power, fame, eternal youth or a new car, but at the root of most of these desires is a need to belong, to be accepted, to connect with others, to be loved. We pride ourselves on our independence, on pulling ourselves up by our own bootstraps, having a successful career and above all not 38
“We can foster, nurture and build our internal sense of connection and taking responsibility for our own feelings. It just takes a little courage and a spirit of adventure. “
depending on anyone. But, as psychologists from Maslow to Baumeister have repeatedly stressed, the truth of the matter is that a sense of social connection is one of our fundamental human needs. For those who doubt, just think of the sting of rejection. A brain imaging study led by Ethan Kross at the University of Michigan suggests that the same parts of the brain are activated during social rejection as during physical pain. Another study lead by Shelley Taylor at the University of California, suggests that stress due to conflict in relationships leads to increased inflammation levels in the body, which is the basis of physical disease. Both physically and psychologically, we experience social connection as positive and rejection or loneliness as negative. While many of us cannot always control the number of friends we have, one thing we can take responsibility for is the state of our mind. Ever felt lonely in a crowd or a group of your own acquaintances? In the same way, it is possible to feel connected in a group of strangers. We can foster, nurture and build our internal sense of connection and taking responsibility for our own feelings. It just takes a little courage and a spirit of adventure. When we are disconnected from ourselves — from who we really are and from our feelings — and when we are not filling ourselves with
love through our spiritual connection, we create a black hole within. The black hole we’ve created through our self-abandonment becomes like a vacuum, trying to pull love from others. This neediness tends to push people away, so we end up feeling even more unloved. When we want responsibility for our own wellbeing and we open to learning about loving ourselves, we open the door to connecting with an infinite source of love. Learning to bring this love within and share it with others creates deep inner fulfillment. What happens when we aren’t connected with ourselves? When we have not learned how to connect with our feelings and with the love and comfort of our spiritual guidance, we often turn to addictions as a way of managing painful feelings. In order to be able to manage and regulate our feelings in healthy ways, we need to connect with them with a desire to take loving responsibility for them. Turning to addictive behavior is a form of self-abandonment — a way of avoiding responsibility for our feelings — and can lead to many negative consequences. Our passion and creativity thrive through our connection with our feelings and with our spiritual guidance. When we disconnect from our feelings to protect against pain, we
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also shut out joy, creativity and passion. Life becomes flat, pointless and boring. Love and joy live in the same place in the heart as loneliness and heartbreak. When we shut down, trying to not feel our loneliness and heartbreak, we also shut down our ability to feel love and joy. What is the solution? You don’t have to live this way. You can learn to connect within. You can learn to move your focus from outer — trying to get love and connection from others — to inner, truly loving yourself and others. You can learn to shift from avoiding feeling your painful feelings to compassionately embracing them with a desire to learn about what they are telling you. You can learn to take loving care of yourself and experience the deep joy of sharing your love with others. Connection is fostered by a community’s social networks that: • Offer social support • Enhance social trust • Support members living harmoniously together • Foster civic engagement
•
Empower members to participate community and democracy
in
To me a community is a group of individuals connected to each other by one or more attribute(s) or united by a common thread (common-unity). The element that links them together is at the core, and is the essence of the group. Community — i.e. “nurturing human connection” — is essential for our survival. We humans wither outside of community. It isn’t a luxury, a nice thing; community is essential to our wellbeing and belonging to a community is one of our basic human needs. Back in tribal times, not belonging meant exclusion, which meant we would die. And so, we fear exclusion and we fear loneliness. Appreciating that community is essential to human wellbeing, calls us to a particular kind of courage: walking with our fear of exclusion in order to stand up for inclusion for all. We must risk exclusion — alienating or at least disturbing others — to become advocates for inclusion in community. 40
I look at my friends and I think to myself, “Where did I meet these crazy people?” But then I think “What would I do without them?”
Inclusion in the social life of society is community’s foundation. By inclusion, I mean universal access to entry. Starting with legal protections against exclusion — racial discrimination, for example — but going far, far beyond. Inclusion means access to jobs with fair pay, decent shelter, effective schools, and reliable health care. If you deprive “a man of a job or an income,” said Martin Luther King, Jr., “you are in substance saying to that man that he has no right to exist…it is murder, psychologically…”
and we are all connected as part of a global community. You can contact Carol at: carolmay54@live.co.uk
Yet today the ethic in ascendance is exclusion…. But there is something potentially dangerous about communities. A community that is safe, comfortable, and trusting can be so enticing that individuals can forget about the world outside of their community, or regard other communities with subtle prejudices. Maybe we need to be reminded that, while we give to our communities, other communities are no less deserving. And when I form a connection with someone based on common experience, it is not because they are from my town; it is because we are both human beings, Join the discussion...
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Profile: Taking a look at a key Collaborator in the community.
Kay Westrap
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Who is Kay Westrap? I am a wife to Lee, Nanny to 2 Grandchildren, ‘Auntie from Hell’ to 9 Nieces and Nephews and 7 Great Nieces and Nephews. Fur Mummy to 4 huge slobbery dogs! This being my second marriage (I call the first my ‘training marriage’) I appreciate the love and connection that I have with Lee. He is my reason for being, my rock, my source of joy and I am most decidedly the source of his entertainment when he is tormenting me! What fills you with joy? Laughter. Being busy. Being loved (took me my whole life to work out that I was!) Showing love and giving love. At the end of every day, falling asleep in the arms of the one I love – only to be woken many times in short succession by puppies in training!
need to help others in mental anguish were all founded in my own personal struggles and the desire that when I had got myself sorted, I would be there for others in their time of need and through their life challenges. This led me to be a Samaritan for over 10 years, to Volunteer with children in under privileged schools, in Foster Care and to work with Children and Adults with Physical and Learning disabilities. This is not me looking for my sainthood – trust me. It is me looking for my sanity and purpose. Giving back makes me feel balanced and congruent. Incidentally I feel the same if I don’t have enough fruit đ&#x;˜Šđ&#x;˜Šđ&#x;˜Š If you could choose one BeCollaboration value that you identify with what might that be?
Ooh Tough one! Problem being it is 2 in equal measure: Fun – The joy of living and laughing. What is your reason for BEing? Or in other Love – Acceptance of our selves and others, words what are you passionate about? it’s all you need. Simply I cannot do one without the other. They Seeing the love in another’s eyes. I had a are my Yin and Yang! timeline therapy some years ago and it took me back to my creation where I was one with You have been a member of BeCollaboration my Creator. At that point the purpose I had in for a while now, can you remember what/ this world was made clear to me. I am here who first attracted you to the organisation? to love other people’s children. This made huge sense. It made my whole life become I met a guy called Mark Constable in a clear. I could not have my own children, and networking meeting and during the breakfast yet I wanted loads. I was never meant to have we talked about what made us tick – which my own as my purpose is to be a servant to in itself was odd in a networking meeting, others. Even before this I had always known where you normally focus on what can I sell that loving children lit me up, but it was at this you! He said that I should get myself along to point all the jigsaw pieces fell into place. I think BeCollaboration as I would love it. I did, and I I have extended that purpose through my own did! life experiences. My need to give back, my Join the discussion...
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I remember at my Induction meeting that I said that I felt “I have come home”. That is how I feel at every meeting. There I do not feel like a square peg in a round hole, but a star shaped peg in a star shaped hole! Or as Angela Makepeace described me as a “Love Sponge” then maybe it should be in a Love Sponge shaped hole?
honourable, trustworthy and kind. I would like to be remembered for my sense of humour and fun. My passion is love and that I share in abundance. Sometimes I put others before my own needs, that is something I am learning to control and to value my own time and energy more. Are you free to operate within your Genius? What does that mean for you?
This issue of The Quest has focused on ‘Community’, how do you see the importance of having community in your business and for I have so many ‘geniuses’ (is that a word, your life? should it be genii? Lol) that I am a busy bunny. I am a true Gemini and love to multi-task and How can anyone exist without Community? have multiple spinning plates. I can’t say I Personally, I love to be in communities, I love am always operating at my genius level, but meetup groups, I love networking meetings, I know I have the freedom to. I am fortunate but more than any I love BeCollaboration that my Husband loves and encourages my because it’s like your ‘bestest’ friend in the many genius states and takes great pleasure world. Even if you can’t be there physically for in my successes, as I do his. We celebrate a while, when you do turn up it is like you have success all the time. Mini successes are just as never been away. Its where you never have to remarkable and praise worthy as major ones. explain yourself, you just BE and that is always If you wait for the big-ticket items, you may enough. never get any! So, celebrate every day every thing and most of all be grateful. I truly am. As part of the team for The Quest you get to be part of the growing voice of BeCollaboration, What vision do you have for your business how do you share YOUR passion with the working with the BeCollaboration world? community? Having the loudest laugh on the planet and not being a shrinking violet, most people that have ever met me will remember me! Not all will like me I am sure but, I hope that for the most part, people see me as truthful,
I want Engage (BeCollaboration’s commercial venture) to be huge, to be working in my flow and helping create wonderful breakthroughs for so many companies and individuals. I want it to pay my bills and make my work life
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“When you work with like-hearted people, it’s not work. I genuinely want to help the vision and mission of BeCollaboration. ”
sing! That would be awesome – working with other Collaborators to create something that would never have existed, were it not for our Collaboration. Can you share how the BeCollaboration community has supported you and given you a vision going forward for your business or indeed your life? Every single meeting, call, encounter and email, supports me. When you work with like-hearted people, it’s not work. I genuinely want to help the vision and mission of BeCollaboration. To make the community stronger and bigger, purely because the more people that join, the more of my family are coming home. How glorious to know that you can literally open your heart to a whole group of people and know the contents are safe in their hands. Some people never experience that with another human being, let alone a whole bunch of them!
Churches or places of worship maybe? But BeColl is definitely not faith based. That is not to say that there are not people of faith and those that are deeply spiritual. BUT it is not religious in any way. In fact, I would suppose that some are very much NOT religious. That is fine by the way. No one expects you to believe what they believe. You are what you are, and you are accepted as such. You have some very opinionated individuals, but they will fight passionately for your right to disagree with them. They should expect a fun atmosphere – almost irreverent. A challenging environment, but in a supportive way. I have seen individuals grow and develop throughout their membership of the community, some are unrecognisable. It can be controversial, it can be emotional, it can be all sorts of things. It’s most definitely not Business Networking, but paradoxically, business is done frequently.
If someone is interested in coming along I view it as an investment in my mental health, to a BeCollaboration meeting, from your spiritual health and my personal development perspective what might they expect when and growth space. they get there? You can contact Kay at: I think some people find it a little daunting. Where else do you go where people speak from kaywestrap@gmail.com the heart, may get emotional, may challenge each other, have controversial discussions? 46
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The Quest Invitation to visit.
BeCollaboration believe that true collaboration – as you have witnessed here in The Quest, occurs when people develop and deepen their relationship, building trust through sharing their authentic self. This doesn’t generally happen as a result of online communication. Meeting face to face is the best way to create amazing possibilities where wonderful projects happen. The Quest is just one such project. We believe that meeting regularly is fundamental to our growth and learning so we have monthly meetings for guests and Collaborators to meet and discuss new ideas, issues and potential solutions. Each meeting delivers knowledge sharing, business insights, personal development opportunities as well as thought leaders in the making presenting their genius to the room. All of this in an atmosphere where fun and laughter are paramount. At the end of the meeting, we find no one wants to leave so we continue the conversations in a social get together for as long as you want to stay. If you would like to visit and meet our community you are very welcome. There is no cost to attend, simply bring an open mind and a listening heart. You can get full meeting information including upcoming dates and venue details here www.becollaboration.com just click on ATTEND A MEETING. We look forward to meeting you soon.
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Dates:
*** No meetings in December***
3rd January 11th January 17th January 22nd January
Essex, Herts, Surrey, London,
Chelmsford Hertford Banstead Shad Thames
7th Feburary 15th Feburary 21st Feburary 26th Feburary
Essex, Herts, Surrey, London,
Chelmsford Hertford Banstead Shad Thames
7th March 15th March 21st March 26th March
Essex, Herts, Surrey, London,
Chelmsford Hertford Banstead Shad Thames
What happens at a BeCollaboration meeting. 2pm – 3pm is the Introduction for guests. Learn more about what inspires us to be part of the community, our journey so far and how to make the most of your visit. 3pm – 6pm The Collaborators will join you to share, create, discuss, inspire and learn – plus have fun! 6pm onwards there is always a social vibe to continue the conversation, you are very welcome to stay and we can get to know you more too. We look forward to welcoming you to a BeCollaboration event soon.
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“I’ve learnt that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made tham feel.” Maya Angelou
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