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Jerilynn feels fortunate because she says Jon is great at talking to the boys and her about racial issues. “I’ve always had the mantra that you can’t fight the whole world, and if you do, you can’t win,” Jon says. “So, I teach our kids that you can’t let racism stop you from achieving. You have to make intelligent decisions and react in a calculated manner. My son’s experience on the basketball court may have changed his demeanor, but he managed to maintain his sense of what is right, maintain a level of decorum and not let it disintegrate and affect what he wanted to accomplish.”

Even though Jerilynn felt helpless, Jackson is extremely proud of his mother. “She’s selfless,” he says. “She never puts herself above anybody else. She makes sure everyone around her is OK.”

When Jerilynn thinks about her white privilege, she says she doesn’t ever have to worry that when people meet her or when she goes out, she’ll be judged on the color of her skin. “Every time my kids go out, they do,” she says, recalling when the boys got their driver’s licenses. “Jon said he needed to talk to them about getting pulled over and I was like, ‘What do you mean you have to talk to them about getting pulled over?’ I take it for granted,” Jerilynn says. “If I get pulled over, I will reach over and pull out my license and I don’t think about those things.”

Jon taught the boys a protocol. If they get pulled over, he explained they need to place their wallet, license and insurance on the dashboard. If stopped at night, they must turn on the dome light. Most importantly, they must always keep their hands visible to the police officer.

“Even if they believe they’ve been pulled over for a bogus reason, Jon taught the boys they still need to follow the directions,” she says. “I’m guessing most white people don’t have to tell their kids that, but we did.”