Defining and Analyzing Self-Control From my experience, self-control in our daily lives is to be able to avoid doing unproductive activities in order to give our time, energy, and other resources to more productive activities. Discipline then could be looked at as being able to do the more productive activities consistently in our lives. Although the definition of these two words could be looked at from many different angles, I see self-control and discipline as two sides of the same coin. Life Management Skills As with discipline, self-control becomes
much easier with good life management skills. When we keep all areas of our lives as productive and balanced as possible, we are less susceptible to temptation and it becomes easier to keep our lives on track. Having vision for our lives, setting goals, meeting goals, and rewarding ourselves when we reach these goals leaves little time and attention to lesser productive activities.
A Plan of Escape If we can anticipate temptations that will arise that would take us off track, we can devise a plan to deal with the situation swiftly and without a second thought. Also,
if we can cultivate a "can do" and "will find a solution" mindset in our lives, we will remember in an unplanned situation that we have the power to discover and choose the best choice and not be a victim. The First Couple Seconds When faced with a temptation the first couple seconds are usually the deciding seconds of any crucial decision. It helps to have a prepared plan in place and take decisive action immediately to do the right thing. Prayer and Meditation
You can help yourself by utilizing sincere prayer in your time of trial if you are a person of faith. This is something that even 12 step programs mention at the first step. Mediation is also helpful in overcoming temptation and making healthy choices in life. One type of meditation frequently used by successful people is visualizing successful accomplishments and actions ahead of time. This type of rehearsal in your mind increases your confidence and prepares you ahead of time for swift and decisive action. People, Places, and Things People, places, and things has become somewhat of a catchphrase for those
overcoming addictive behaviors. This phrase can also apply to any other temptation that would take us from the best choices for our lives. Sometimes the people we associate with can lead us into temptation or old habits. Places we go to can lead us down roads we regret we went down later. Physical items can trigger memories of old habits or decisions.
Boundaries One theme people, places, and things have in common are healthy boundaries. Boundaries keep our personal identity in tact and remind us of the power of individual choice. It's important to set up clear and recognizable boundaries for yourself in regard to who you will spend time with, how long, where, and what physical items you will choose to stay away from.
Historical Strength and Vulnerability It's worth saying for many reasons that the more positive choices you make, the easier it will become to continue to make positive choices. The same principle applies to negative choices. It's also worth saying that you are always just one decision away from
making a negative choice, so please be humble for you are not indestructible. When changing habits, it's important to be patient but persevere. I've seen different statistics on how long it takes to change a habit. Some studies have shown 21 days and others 60 or more days. A Quick Summation Self-control is the ability to choose not to do unproductive activities in order to follow a more productive path. Self-control becomes easier when all areas of your life are managed to be as productive and balanced as possible, when you have plans of action and escape in place when faced with temptation, when you have clear
boundaries in place in regard to people, places, and things, when you have more of a history of making positive decisions, and when you equip yourself ahead of time with prayer and/or meditation. Where are You? So where are you in regard to self-control? How productive and balanced are areas of your life? Do you have a clear plan of escape and action in place when faced with possible temptations so that you can make a quick decision without second thoughts? Do you have good boundaries in place in regard to people, places, and things? Do you cultivate a "I can do" and a "solution is here" attitude instead of a victim mentality?
Do you utilize prayer and/or meditation in your daily life? What tips for improving selfcontrol do you need to work on now?