How Long i s TOO Long t o Wai t Bef or e He/ She Comm i t s?

To walk away or to wait it out? That isthequestion

For many of us who are currently dating or have a history of dating, we know what it?s like to wait for a commitment from the person we?reseeing or are involved with It can grueling not knowing where you stand or if the connection will ever blossom into something bigger Question after question, and date after date, you find yourself wondering if you?ve waited around too long and what the fate will be of your love life Like many who find themselvesin thispredicament, whether you should move on comes to mind more often than not, and to be honest, that is a question only you can answer

Time is one of the only things you can never get back once it?s gone It?s precious, it?s meaningful, and for many, it?s the precursor to determining your next move in life

Because time is so fragile, here are some questions to consider while dating someone of interest and wondering if your time spent with them istoo long:

Did their feelin gs for you in cr ease or decr ease as tim e w en t on ?

This indicator should be an easy one to pick up on We can always tell when a person?s feelings for us intensify or if they go down Knowing this can eliminate spending more time than you should with someone you think may or may not commit to you If their feelings for you are not building, neither should your timewith them

Did you cr eate boun dar ies ear ly-on in to the fr ien dship/ con n ection ?

Through your actions and words, communicate the things that you do and don? t care for in your pursuit of healthy dating (i e, Explaining your non-negotiable on inconsistency with time/dates) When you create boundaries for yourself you don? t run into the rut of having dating him/her for months on-end, just to be left in limbo with your commitment status

H ow m uch tim e did they spen d w ith you?

There?s that word again? time Is the person you want a commitment with spending time with you or is your connection mostly growing through phone conversations or texting? Evaluating how much time you spend with someone you?re longing for a commitment with should determine if you should even pursue one So, if you?ve been spendingquality timeon dateswith someone you like and you?re seeing each other in a flourishing way, revisit their feelings and your boundaries to determine if you?re waitingaround for too long

While these questions shouldn? t be the only determining factors, they are major in deciding whether to walk or away or to keep waiting When you?re dating, and you really like the person you?re seeing, (and they feel the same way), waiting usually isn? t a task Things flow naturally, conversations are brought up authentically, and you typically know where the other person stands as it relatesto acommitted relationship

Ditch the timeline and focus on what matters; how your time is spent, how they feel about you, and most importantly the boundariesthat you laid out from day one

WRITTEN BY Toni Douglas