DENTISTRY

You might think being a teeth expert is all about polishing and flossing, but in a horror film it's a whole new level of skill. Forget about just doing a filling, you’ll need to have a cunning mind, too. You see a killer on the loose? No need to run for your life! Just call them up and offer them an appointment for those manky-ass teeth. Then, after a few visits, hit them with an exorbitant bill that will bankrupt them to the point where they can't afford a knife. Simple. And if that fails, you have a whole swath of anaesthetics and sharp tools in your back pocket. Plus, they’re probably more scared of you than you are of them. You’re a dentist, after all.

Outcome: Survive

Psychology

Well, this is a bit of a tricky situation. Do you risk trying to convince the axe murderer that they’re just in their bad bitch era through the magic of gaslighting and therapy, or do you succumb to your own inner demons and become the killer yourself? Decisions, decisions…

Outcome: Uncertain, but insufferable either way

Physics

Sure, physics is all about boring maths equations and incomprehensible theories, but don't underestimate the power of you nerds during a serial killer spree. With your expertise in mathematical skills and precise measurements, they might just be your best ally in a crisis. These guys can Home Alone the shit out of Ghostface, setting up an elaborate trap that uses physics principles to maximum effect. But beware! Your skills may attract masses of terrified arts students wanting to team up with you. Fear not, as they make excellent bait.

Outcome: Survive

Health Science

When the new wave of plague hits, there’s no doubt you'll be the busiest. Not only are you experts at patching up injuries and allocating medicine, but you'll also be busy identifying the virus that caused this mess in the first place. So strap on your scrubs and get ready to save the world! You will be protected for your skills, but you're also going to be working harder than you've ever worked before, and that includes the all-nighter you pulled before the CELS191 exam.

Outcome: Survive, but at what cost?

While your expertise in rocks is commendable, I'm afraid it won't be much use against a killer spider. Unless, of course, that spider is a massive fan of geology and can be easily distracted by the mesmerising beauty of your mineral collection. You may be able to navigate the group through the forest, and you may be able to out-drink the rest of the crew, but with your all-too-chill attitude and penchant for wandering off alone there’s no way you’ll survive this one. You’ll go missing right when they need you the most. Did the monster get you? Maybe. Did you accidentally wander off a cliff? Even more likely.

Outcome: Die fifth