Weekly Report 2-28

Keeping the Foundation of Fatherhood Strong for Families and the Community

Children’s Center Keeping the Foundation of Fatherhood Strong for Families and the Community

By d-mars.com News Provider

According to the National Fatherhood Initiative (NFI), adolescent boys with absent fathers are more likely to engage in delinquency than those whose fathers are present. NFI also reports that boys have fewer behavior problems and girls have fewer psychological problems when they have involved dads. And NFI information also highlights that fathers are not only beneficial for the child’s life, but for the mom’s as well, reducing moms’ parenting stress and their involvement during pregnancy positively influencing healthy outcomes for mom, the baby, and him.

It is an undeniable fact that active and loving fathers play an essential role in a child’s life, supporting their growth and development into wellrounded adults. With the rising divorce rate and unmarried parents working through the challenges of co-parenting, the family dynamic has changed. However, the need for fathers remains imperative. DePelchin Children’s Center (DePelchin) is helping to keep our families and communities solid through the strong foundation of fatherhood.

DePelchin, a nonprofit organization founded in 1892, has locations

throughout Houston and across Texas with proven programs positively strengthening the lives of children by enhancing their mental health and physical well-being. As an accredited foster care and adoption agency, DePelchin serves the most vulnerable children and families in Texas and remains diligent in breaking the cycles of abuse and neglect. And through DePelchin All Dads Succeed (DADS), the organization is breaking the cycle of absentee fathers. Program Coordinator Ralph DeMar leads and guides DADS . “DePelchin has successfully provided parenting services for more than 25 years. The organization began its first Fatherhood Program in 2019 and DADS is an expansion of the services that are available for fathers in Houston and the surrounding communities. DADS encourages father involvement, also fully supporting, promoting, and engaging fathers in a way that meets them where they are and takes them where they desire to be as fathers,” said DeMar.

The uniqueness of DADS is that it is a program created by fathers, for fathers. There is no guidebook on parenting, so this initiative’s valuable resources and tools available help fathers successfully maneuver parenting and co-parenting. “The curricula used in facilitation of groups speaks to fathers in a way that is open, honest, and empowering to fathers. It addresses very difficult topics in parenting such as understanding a child’s development, communication, discipline, and co-parenting,” DeMar expressed. Fathers working on improving the relationship with their co-parent can invite them to participate as well, cultivating healthy co-parenting. This allows them to grow together, sustaining the changing dynamics of the family and parenting relationship. DADS recognizes that each father may have their own

individual needs. Group support and one-on-one case management aids fathers in their personal growth and goal planning, addressing the common stressors that many fathers and families face.

D-MARS: DePelchin has many programs, but what led you to start the DADS program?

DePelchin: DePelchin Children’s Center has provided general parenting services for over 25 years. Over the last ten years, we have seen outstanding growth in father engagement in our counseling and parenting programs. Historically, these programs have been tailored to work with a primary parent or main parent contact, which is often listed as “the mother.” While the programs encourage father involvement, they have not been set up in a way to fully support, promote, and engage fathers in a way that meets them where they desire to be.

DePelchin began its first Fatherhood Program in 2019 and the new DePelchin All Dads Succeed Program (DADS) is an expansion of the services that are now available to fathers in Houston and the surrounding communities.

D-MARS: What are the top challenges you see fathers face and how does DADS help them overcome these challenges?

DePelchin: As a culture, we often recognize the impact that mothers have on their children, but fathers do not always receive the same recognition. Research shows that fathers are just as important in helping children with emotion regulation, language development, social skills, and making healthy choices. Having an active, loving father can set children up for great success. Fathers want to be present and active in their child’s life, but there are often barriers that make this difficult. This could result from a difficult relationship with the child’s mother, limited access, financial difficulty, limited understanding around positive parenting, etc. DADS seeks to support fathers in these areas so they can focus on what matters most: understanding their child, supporting their development, and creating life-long positive relationships.

D-MARS: Talk about how DADS is for not only biological fathers, but bonus fathers as well, and any man who is in the father role.

DePelchin: Children can greatly benefit from a father-figure. This looks different for every family and DePelchin recognizes the impact that stepfathers, foster fathers, adoptive fathers, and other types of “fathers” can have on a child. The mission of DePelchin is to “strengthen the lives of children by enhancing their mental health and physical well-being.” All children deserve to have a loving and supportive caregiver to strengthen their lives, and this includes anyone who identifies in a father-figure role.

D-MARS: How does DADS support a father coparenting in peace, especially when there is conflict with the mother of the child?

DePelchin: DADS uses an evidence-based curriculum called “Supporting Father

Involvement,” which addresses the importance of both father and co-parent, as each individual role supports one purpose: developing a child to reach their greatest potential. The curriculum provides strategies to help co-parents address communication and conflict, but also supports the individual perspectives and unique styles that both parents contribute to the parenting role.

D-MARS: Do you find fathers are now more open to talking about their challenges being a father?

DePelchin: When fathers join the group, they quickly learn that there are fathers just like them experiencing the same successes and challenges. This opens the group up to a lot of discussions that are sometimes very difficult to understand unless you are a dad. They leave the group with a community of other dads who understand and support them, developing a support team for life.

D-MARS: Does DADS have a mental health component to this program for fathers as well?

DePelchin: All fathers and co-parents who are entering groups complete various assessments to provide information on supportive tools that can help them with a variety of needs. The program’s one-on-one case management services help guide the father in developing a plan for improving his overall potential and well-being not only as a father, but as an individual. If a father expresses concerns regarding his own mental health or his child’s, DePelchin offers counseling services.

D-MARS: Does DADS have a mentorship component to this program?

DePelchin: Some fathers who grew up without a father are doing the best they can to maneuver fatherhood. DADS provides a mentorship component where graduates of the program can engage with other participants to create a supportive, ongoing relationship. Mentors are invited to join the program’s Facebook group to maintain communication and are invited to future orientations to share their experiences and make connections.

D-MARS: What can the community do to uplift, encourage, and celebrate fathers as they do mothers?

DePelchin: The community can play a large role in supporting father involvement

by looking at ways to improve their daily interactions with fathers in the community. This includes areas where fathers may not have reasonable equity such as the workplace, daycares/schools, medical facilities, places of worship, and courts and legal systems. As a community, we can identify ways to ensure that fathers feel welcome, have a voice, and are given the opportunity to provide support to their children and families.

DADS is providing support to the mother, father, and child, making for a more cohesive family unit. DeMar expressed, “After completing the program, many fathers report that they have developed stronger relationships with their children and co-parent. They have learned to communicate and connect with their children and partner in new ways. This benefits mothers as well, because parenting is now a shared role rather than an individual responsibility.”

Short-term goals for DADS include improved quality of father-child engagement and progress toward greater economic stability. Long-term goals include reduced poverty and reduced risk of child maltreatment. Through the project’s continuous efforts and commitment, the positive impact for fathers will heighten the safety and wellbeing of children that will be long-established.

For more information about the DePelchin Children’s Center and DePelchin All Dads Succeed, please visit www.depelchin.org.

Source: National Fatherhood Initiative