December 2019
DELIGHTED SOUL Family, Forgiveness & Finances
Letter from the Editor Wow! Here we are at the end of 2019. I pray that God has truly touched your heart and changed you as much as He has changed me over the last twelve months. For some, this year was full of joy - new friendships, marriages, children, promotions, and we rejoice with you, sis! For others, the year was full of hurt, loss and confusion, maybe even regret, but you know what? The Word tells us to rejoice in that too because all things are working together for the good of those who love God and are called according to His purpose. Only He can turn our mourning into dancing and our sorrow into joy, and we praise Him for that. Maybe you’re like me, and this year has brought you both good days and bad days - no matter what your year looked like, you’re still here, and I for one am grateful for that. This is the last issue in the first year of this magazine and what a year it has been. Thank you for all of your prayers and kind words. Stay tuned, this is only the beginning.
Jasmine Powell
Table of Contents
3 Favor in Our Finances 4 6 Break It Down Michelle’s Jewels 8 A Skintastic Winter
REGIMEN ADVICE FROM EBONY POWELL
IDEAS BY KRYSTAL HAWKINS
WISDOM FROM MICHELLE POWELL
A magazine for young women in pursuit of deeper relationship with Jesus.
A Skintastic Winter Help your skin combat the cold weather with these tips from Make Up Artist Ebony Powell (@blackglass)
One of the biggest beauty lies I heard growing up was that “black women don’t need sunscreen”. TUH! Black girls definitely got magic, but they ain’t Jesus. The focus and TLC we give our skin is just as important as the TLC we give our crowns. Our skin, no matter what your ethnic background, is a special gift that we, a lot of times, take for granted. Despite allllllll the alterations, quick fixes and changes we have access to, it’s vitally important to nurture your skin to ensure you’re putting your best face forward every day. My love for skin care began in the 7th grade when I woke up one morning to find my once clear face engulfed in zits...on picture day, no less! Literally, from that day on, I started cleansing my face every morning and every night. I remember mentioning astringent to a classmate in the 10th grade, and she was completely lost. But I made a decision early in my life to start paying attention to skincare. As the years have passed, I’ve added, swapped, changed, and tossed things in my regimen as needed. Like millions of women around the world, chances are your skin is about to need some serious attention. The winter is THAT season that takes so much out of our skin and we have to work double time in order to keep it looking luminous. If you fall in the same age bracket as me (25-35…I’m 33), chances are you’ve already established a skin care regimen that you practice daily. If not, you’d better get on it ASAP because life and age have a way of pulling and tugging on your skin, leaving it sometimes questionable to the naked eye...and to an HD camera. And we’re not even going to mention the many times a day we poke, scratch, dig, and rub our beautiful faces. A solid regimen is definitely a must for EVERY woman. It should be noted that if you’re not drinking tons of water this winter (and every season), you’re already doing your body a disservice. Water is the #1 way to keep your skin glowing. I recommend buying a water bottle and keeping it filled CONSTANTLY! If you’re not making a mad dash to the bathroom every 30 minutes, you’re probably not drinking enough water. Below is the routine I’m currently following. Feel free to copy and paste! My skin is a combo of dry and oily (mostly in my T-zone). All of these products can be found at Sephora, Ulta, or Amazon. Enjoy!
FACE SCRUB
SERUM
Used 3-4 times a week to exfoliate the face, creating a fresh canvas. St. Ives Apricot Facial Scrub
Used to maintain youthfulness and fight against wrinkles and fine lines. L’Oreal Paris Revitalift Derm Intensives Hyaluronic Acid
Facial Serum
FACE WASH
MOISTURIZER
Used every morning and every night to maintain a clean face. Ole Henriksen Find Your Balance™ Oil Control Cleanser
Used day and night to help keep skin hydrated and moisturized. First Aid Beauty Ultra Repair Face Moisturizer
TONER
FACE OIL
Used as an extra cleansing product. Helps with getting residue that might be left behind from makeup. Thayers Alcohol-Free Witch Hazel Facial Toner (I use the lavender scent, but they also have scent free)
Used at night for an extra heavy layer of moisture. Sleeping in this allows the oils to penetrate deep into the skin. Palmer’s Skin Therapy Face Oil
DAY EYE CREAM
NECK CREAM
Used day and night to help with dark circles and puffiness. Honest Beauty Depuff Eye Gel
Yep! You need this. A woman’s neck can say a lot about her age and lifestyle. I use this to keep my neck and decollate area tight and firm. TARTE Maracuja Neck Treatment
SUNSCREEN
Used EVERY DAY to protect myself from the sun. Contrary to popular myth, Black women NEED SPF…every single day. Glossier Invisible Shield Daily Sunscreen
EYE DROPS
My eyes tend to get VERY dry, causing them to water excessively. The drops helps to keep them moisturized. Systane Ultra Lubricant Eye Drops
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Favor in Our Finances Ideas from Krystal Hawkins (@kryslejoye)
Ladies, we only have a few weeks left in 2019! I feel myself getting emotional just thinking about all the things we have accomplished so far. We’ve had all sorts of growing pains (for sure) along the way, but we are at the end of another year, and another decade. So let’s appreciate this moment and be grateful. Let’s proclaim God’s favor over our lives (and our pockets) into the new year. Today is all about cultivating a new state of mind with budgeting tips that can propel our financial goals forward. Declaring God's Favor Jeremiah 29:11 reads, “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” We’re always looking for prosperity – especially in our finances. But how often do we align our own priorities with God’s plan? God can put us in a position to take on new challenges – a college degree, a new job, a startup business, first apartment, a house, a baby – all without us knowing how it will affect finances in the long run. Because we are not physically able to see God’s plan, we become impatient. We try to control everything, and end up falling off track because we allowed God’s plan to fall by the wayside (I know I am guilty of this). For this reason, we have to make God the center of our finance track. In order to develop a progressive mindset, we need to ask God to steer our paths forward in financial wellness. Remember no matter what bind we are faced with, God has authority over them all. Though it will take time to improve our finances, we can trust Him to help get us through it. Here’s a helpful prayer to declare more financial wellness: God, please reveal your plan for me. What have you called me to do so that I may prosper in the future? I need your help to maintain financial growth. I need your help to declutter my money management skills. Lord, work through me. I am keeping to your Word by embracing your plans over my life. With your help, I can create a healthy financial lifestyle for myself. In Jesus’ name, Amen. Now, Check those Spending Habits, Sis. We have to get grounded in our financial goals, ladies. After reading through a Refinery29 article, I realized that I needed to resolve my own spending issues and save more coins. I’ll admit, I can be a nervous wreck when it comes to budgeting – it can be a challenge to keep track of monthly expenses, paying off debt, saving money and still fitting in what I call, a self-care purchase. In order to get past this anxiety, I’ve learned how to manage more of my spending by using a budget. To help prioritize your spending habits, check out the budgeting strategies listed below. Keep in mind that one strategy does not work for all, so do your best to identify which method works well for you!
CREATE A VISION BOARD Make a visual board collection of financial goals you want to achieve (i.e. buying a house, traveling abroad, generating family income). Showcase what financial wellness looks like for you in the next few years, and place it somewhere visible to capture your daily attention. You can also use a photo for inspiration, make it your screensaver to stay focused on the goals you’ve set for yourself.
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UTILIZE A BAE (BEFORE ANYTHING ELSE) BUDGET Arrange a money-care date with yourself, once every two weeks. If possible, schedule your date on the exact day you receive your paycheck, so you can set aside important funds sooner than later. During your money-care date, review all your income and open bank accounts, and distribute the money you’ll need for the next two weeks. Set aside your funds into three categories (try adding in subnames):
MANDATORIES: Rent/mortgage, car and gas, insurance, groceries and bills WORTHY INVESTMENTS: Tithes/offering, 20% paycheck contribution into savings PLAY MONEY: Self-care purchases, traveling, dining out, etc. Once the first two categories have been set, utilize the remaining funds (Play Money) to splurge on yourself (Hint: this is where you’ll have to budget the most!)
FAST FROM UNNECESSARY SPENDING Challenge yourself for 21 days and restrain yourself from making purchases that cater to lifestyle needs. Ask yourself: what unnecessary items or experiences can be put on hold for the next 21 days (or longer)? It may be difficult, but budgeting is possible regardless of what our financial situation is telling us. We need to prioritize budgeting by our list of needs, instead of sacrificing funds for our everyday wants. More Budgeting Resources There are so many methods to keeping our coins intact, let’s use them! Essence and Chase Currency Conversation College Budget Saving Tips Black Girls Guide to Financial Literacy Eliza Dumais 5-Day Budget Challenge How to Make Budgeting Fun
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Honoring Our Parents This Issue’s Scripture
“Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land that the Lord your God is giving you.” - Exodus 20:12 -
Break It Down This is a scripture many of us may have grown up thinking was just something grown ups added into our Sunday School lessons to guilt us into listening to them, but we can certainly grasp it much better now that our minds have matured. The Bible tells us that God is not the author of confusion; on the contrary, He is the definition of order. In His immaculate design of our universe and everything within it, God found it necessary enough to create families. As we move to new cities, change jobs and grow in other ways, we often create a sense of family among the people in our lives who are too close to be considered just friends, but this verse is specifically speaking of our biological family - the mother and father whose traits we inherit. When we were born, our parents provided the first opportunity for us to understand obedience, authority, and submission - all things we now practice with our Heavenly Father: obeying His Word, trusting that His plans are higher than ours, and submitting to His will. When we honor our parents by showing them respect, doing what they ask of us, representing them well, and caring for them, not only do we demonstrate gratitude and grow in humility, but God promises a blessing for us on the other side of our actions. Now there are certainly situations when parents make choices that go on to haunt their children, sometimes for the rest of our lives. While children have this task to keep, parents have directions of their own. One example is Ephesians 6:4, which says, “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” We all know parents who have failed to train their children, some people more personally than others. So what does it look like to honor an absent mother or father? Or a mean, abusive or negligent parent? The woman and/or man who put their child up for adoption? Or a parent who passed away at an early age? There is no blanket answer for this, nor should the child bear the shame of their parents or be embarassed by the way that they were raised because of their parents’ actions. Maybe honoring this kind of parent simply looks like forgiveness or working toward understanding. Maybe it looks like committing to pray for them or changing the way you talk about them. In these cases, it is imperative to seek God’s instructions for your specific situation. No matter what we feel, we do not have the authority to discredit the message. Honoring our parents was so important to our all-knowing God that He included it as one of the 10 commandments, and we should see it that way. In reflecting on this scripture, as many of us have started families or are looking forward to that chapter of our lives, let’s think of ways that we can be honorable to our children. What lessons can we teach and examples can we set? Are we disciplined enough to pass that trait on to our children? Are we obeying God’s instructions? Let’s identify the strengths of our childhood, offering grace to our parents for the faults as God grants us His grace every day, and consider how we may be able to one day proclaim, “As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.“
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Michelle's Jewels
Words of Wisdom from Mother-In-Chief Michelle Powell FORGIVENESS IS THE KEY TO SUCCESS Forgive: 1 To grant pardon to a person. 2 To cease to feel resentment against. Forgive and you shall be forgiven.
But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.
Matthew 6:15
Truly I tell you, people can be forgiven all their sins and every slander they utter,
Mark 3:28
And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins. Mark 11:25 Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Ephesians 4:31 Forgiveness is not always easy, but it can be done. Forgive and you shall be forgiven. When someone you have never done anything wrong to hurts you, it does hurt. When someone you love, you value, you have invested time and effort into hurts you, it breaks your heart more than when it is someone you do not know. It really hurts. How do you heal from the pain and bounce back from that deep hurt? The Bible has the answer. Our Lord and Savor, Jesus Christ, says we must forgive sin; forgive other people’s offenses. Jesus does not tell us to take time to process what happened, or who was wrong in the situation. He specifically says forgive. He even asks the question, “How can we expect the Heavenly Father to forgive us our sins, if we will not forgive our brothers and sisters their sins against us.” Sometimes forgiveness does not come quickly to us. We choose to take time to process the hurt, and as time goes by, we end up with severed ties in the relationship. We believe the person that offended us should ask us to forgive them first. We wait for them to say, “I am sorry,” which they never do. Hurt people only move on to hurt other people - until people who are filled with hate come to love through Christ Jesus, they will never understand true forgiveness. True forgiveness frees you from the captivity of sin like anger, bitterness, envy, brawling, slander, and malice. I have been hurt and broken by people who are close to me. Hurt by people to whom I have shown love and kindness. Because of the bountiful blessings that God has bestowed on my life, I did not realize that envy set into those very people that I love and I thought they loved me. I forgave their offense towards me with true forgiveness, and I actually pray for them daily. Their relationship with Jesus Christ was not on my level. I pray to see their relationship with Jesus grow daily. My suggestion to you, dear one, is to forgive others right away. No matter how deep the hurt, you must forgive. Weights come off of us when we forgive and free the offender of the wrong they have done towards us. If we don’t forgive, we are abhorring unforgiveness. Unforgiveness can have a negative effect on our being and cause stress in your body, which can lead to illnesses. True forgiveness is the key to your successful living. Choose to live a spiritually fulfilled, Christian life filled with a heart of love, and a willingness to forgive. May God’s peace and blessings be upon you dear one.
Do you want to share feedback or see a specific topic covered in the future? Let me know! jas@delightedsoulmag.com 7