Inner peace parenting december by Diana Dentinger

December 2013, Issue 15

WITHOUT EXPECTATIONS

Self Giving First GIVING ANSWERS

Kids Ask Why 10 Simple Rules

FOR TOTAL HAPPINESS DEAL WITH MISERABLE

The Cheerless Gratitude Journal

THANKFUL FOR GOOD STUFF C R E A T E W A Y S T O R E J OIC E

Harmony Holidays HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO EVERYONE

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December 2013, Issue 15

CONTENTS

The Cycle of Giving & Receiving The Art of No Expectations page # 5

By Diana Dentinger

Three Ways to Rejoice Creating Harmony Over the Holidays

page # 6

By Lisa Hein

Why Kids Ask “Why” The All Time Question

page # 9

By Dr. Connie Hebert

Being Thankful for the Good Stuff The Gifts of Gratitude Journaling

page # 12

By Tina M. Games

Not Everyone is Full of Cheer How to Deal with the Miserable

page # 16

By Diana Dentinger

What You Teach With A Book Brilliant Books Gift List

page # 19

By Dr. Connie Hebert 3

FROM THE EDITOR

Parenting is very much about giving or your time, your energy and most of all your love! And parenting begins all because you make love to a person you love to conceive another person to love! Sure that could be a bit romanticized since we can find statistics on how many kids were conceived â&#x20AC;&#x153;by mistakeâ&#x20AC;?, how many through artificial insemination, how many against the will of one or both of the parents... and so on. But once you are a parent, no matter how that moment can to be, there is one vital factor in raising happy, confident and loving children. And that is loving yourself first! So many parents are over-givers and create child centered homes. They are so willing to give to their kids they forget their own needs. Sure there are self-centered parents too, but I doubt they read this kind of magazine. How is it that you can create the balance between your needs and the needs of your loved ones? First by understanding your needs and fulfilling them.

December 2013, Issue 15

FEEDBACK Your feedback is welcome. This is your magazine too. Let us know what would help you find inner peace in parenting your children. Contact Inner Peace Parenting Magazine Magazine Privacy Policy Copyright 2012 Diana Dentinger Inner Peace Parenting Magazine Sviluppo CCT sas - Italy All rights reserved under the International and Pan American Copyright Conventions. Reproduction in whole or part is prohibited without written permission from the publisher. The publisher assumes no responsibility for the unsolicited materials.

HAPPIEST HOLIDAYS TO YOU AND YOUR LOVED ONES Diana Dentinger, Editor Inner Peace Parenting Magazine

When you are more happy and satisfied with yourself and your life, then you are a greater example for your kids who can model happiness! For you, a natural giver, remember yourself over the holiday season. Show yourself more self love and spoil yourself to make the holidays even more enjoyable!

Give to Yourself! Self Love Before Other Love. 4

PEACE IN GIVING

The Cycle of Giving & Receiving The Art of No Expectations By Diana Dentinger

http://youtu.be/rQHCfY8c4H0 Remember that it is always important to put “giving” in a cycle. If you think of the phase in this song: “What goes around comes around” then you understand that if you make giving go around it will come back to you as receiving. Often you receive then from a totally different person, as in, a person that you did not give to. You block the cycle if you expect to get from the person you gave to. That is putting things on a scale... not in a cycle! Can you visually see the difference? As moms, especially, give to yourself first!

Diana Dentinger As a neurobiology therapist, Corporate trainer and Personal Development coach Diana Dentinger helps people understand themselves fuller so they love who they are! This is the key to loving others! She works with parents too to help them get into the deeper sense of their children. She offers complimentary consultations: https://dianadentinger.wufoo.com/forms/m1tt6sbm1frxppn/ 5

PEACE IN REJOICING

Three Ways to Rejoice Creating Harmony Over the Holidays By Lisa Hein

The holidays are among us which may mean it’s time to hustle! It’s that time that we now put on our running shoes and begin the holiday juggle while attempting to remain calm and with some sort of sanity. Will we run through the next month wearing everyone out around us or will we find harmony and peace along the way? Here are a few ideas that may provide the calmness required to thrive during this holiday season: 1. Remain Calm! No matter who or what obstacle may come against you, remember that the upcoming celebration is to honor those around us as well as those less-fortunate. It is not a time of ‘seek and hunt’ so that everyone on our shopping list receives their ‘must have’ items. It is a time to sit quietly and reflect on the things we have in our life that have lasting value. When we reflect upon the true meaning of the upcoming holidays, it’s all about being grateful and teaches us how to celebrate life.

2. Share the true meaning of ‘Gratitude’ with your children. There are many children who have been hurt by situations they had nothing to do with. The holidays may be lonely and empty for them. One amazingly beautiful gesture we can take is to share this subject with our children. When we entitle them to everything they want, they don’t know or possibly don’t even want to know that there are children who have nothing and may receive nothing.

Find a local church that may offer names of children whose parent(s) may be incarcerated or perhaps don’t have any parents and are in foster care. Take a few of their cards and take your children shopping for them. When we offer this chance to take our eyes off of self, we inspire them to be more grateful. Anyway, it’s not like they don’t have everything they need already. May this experience allow them to reflect on what this time of the year really means. That their attitude would be filled with gratitude for everything they have.

3. Share peace and joy. This holiday has many meanings spiritually. As we journey through what our definition is, keep in mind that the calendar has indicated it to be the time to celebrate Jesus’ birth and Channukah. They are both holidays that represent being close to our family and friends. Let’s keep our true reason for the season very clear. When we make a small gesture to reach out to others, it may just give that person a reason to go on. There may be neighbors or even friends who feel saddened by these dates, so take time to reach out to those who may not want to face the holidays alone. Be their light in their life when they may feel it’s just so gloomy. Create peace and joy all around you by being conscious of what is really going on. Don’t feel overwhelmed with making sure there is an even number of bulbs on the tree. Don’t put so much pressure on yourself that you feel anxious or bitter. Relax and allow this holiday season to be magnificent and full of joy. There’s so much more to experience when we keep ourselves in a beautiful and peaceful state of mind.

Lisa Hein www.LisaRHein.com International Best Selling Author/Parenting Author/Motivational Speaker whose book, ‘Manifesting God’s Love in Your Family,’ has recently been released. She has been seen and heard on national and local television and radio networks and is beginning her journey sharing this truly inspired book with her audiences. 7 For further information or to order copies of this book, please visit her site.

10 Simple Rules To Make the Holidays Happy

1. Don’t feel sorry for yourself Now is the time to be grateful for all you have and all that you can do! 2. Allow yourself to dream Feed yourself with the enthusiasm of your dreams so you don’t over eat. 3. Follow your bliss If you have a dream, share it with your loved ones so they help it becomes reality. 4. Nothing is impossible When you have the innocence of a child you always believe you can. 5. Observe and be humble Just be curious and open to learn from others. Everyone has something to teach you. 6. Be determined Put effort into things so you find or create the circumstances you need to progress. 7. Use discipline to apply your talents You can want to be great at something but unless you do it then it is just a want! 8. Take care of details and the little things How you do the little things is how you do the big things! 9. Hold your life in your own hands The only limit you have is yourself and your heart. Love and Live who you are. 10. Have a vision There are no limits if you can see what you want! “The only true realist is the visionary” Federico Fellini

PEACE IN ASKING

Why Kids Ask “Why” The All Time Question By Dr. Connie Hebert

h"p://www.youtube.com/watch?v=__cJGXn4dtk

Have you ever been in a car with a 5 year old who can’t stop asking, “Why?” I have...with three kids at once! Parents often ask me why their kids ask “why” all the time. That’s a great question! Let me first say that I would be concerned if they did NOT ask you “why” questions. That’s probably not what you wanted to hear, but it’s true! Pat yourself on the back if they are bombarding you with questions.

When kids are raised in a environments where they are encouraged to express themselves without fear or shame, they let their natural curiosity shine. This manifests in the form of wanting to KNOW everything and anything about the world that comes to mind. So they ask, ”Why?” 9

Here are some examples of typical childhood ‘why questions’ that you may have heard from your kids: Why is that girl crying?

Often times, their ‘why’ questions will be repeated and we will need to repeat the answer, time and time again. Keep at it. They are thinking!

Why do I have to wear a seatbelt? Why do we brush our teeth so much? Why can’t I stay up late? Why does Joey get to go and I don’t? Why do I have to pick up my clothes? Why is he barking? Why can’t I have more? Why do babies cry? Kids want to know WHY things are the way they are! If we view their ‘why’ questions as welcome “teachable minutes,” then we find the patience to stop answer all questions so that kids understand.

Once kids understand the ‘why’ of things, they move on to internalize the way things work, but we never truly want them to stop asking “why” the world operates as it does. Why would we?! What kinds of questions do your kids ask? To bring Dr. Connie to your school for parent literacy events, teacher training, model lessons, and more, please fill out an Inquiry Form at www.conniehebert.com

Dr. Connie Hebert Dr. Connie Hebert is dedicated to catching kids in motivating, engaging, and effective ways. She is the author of Catch a Falling Reader, Catch a Falling Writer, Catch a Falling Teacher, Sight Word Phrases, and a new book for parents: The Teachable Minute: The Secret to Raising Smart & Appreciative Kids. More information at: www.theteachableminute.com 10

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PEACE IN WRITING

Being Thankful for the Good Stuff The Gifts of Gratitude Journaling By Tina M. Games

The holiday season brings an energy of celebration and togetherness. It’s an ideal time to notice the many gifts in your life, both personally and professionally. But what if you’re in a frame of mind that’s not so positive, causing you to get lost in a sea of negativity? If you’re finding yourself challenged by day-to-day issues, it’s helpful to remember what is going right in your life. This is where gratitude journaling comes in. Working with the law of attraction, this journaling technique helps switch the focus from negative to positive. And after a few days of gratitude journaling, the mindset starts to change and world views suddenly switch from glass half empty to glass half full. As inspirational speaker and best-selling author, Wayne Dyer says, “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” Your mindset can make or break your success in every area of your life.

As the Law of Attraction states, you get what you think about, whether wanted or unwanted. The simplest definition of this law is “like attracts like.” So your thoughts become part of an energy field, and you become a magnet attracting anything to you that resembles what you’re thinking about. If you think: “This is going to be a horrible day” then it will be. But if you shift your mindset and start thinking,: “This is going to be a great day” then you will start seeing all the good in your day. 12

If you’d like to bring more abundance into your life, there are four things you can do with your pattern of thought: 1. Know what you want. 2. Ask the universe for it. 3. Feel and behave as if the object you’ve asked for is on its way. 4. Be open to receiving it. All forms of matter and energy are attracted to that which is of a like vibration. So if you are sending out positive energy through your thought patterns, then your perspective of everything will change. You will start seeing the glass half full. If you sense that you could benefit from this change of mindset, I’d like to invite you to make a commitment for three weeks. Most experts agree that it takes 21 days to develop a new habit – and with the help of your journal, you can be well on your way to transforming the way you look at things.

If you’re a list-maker, take your journal and list five things you are grateful for every day for the next three weeks. Morning people will find this easier to do first thing in the morning (writing about the day before) while night people will find this easier in the evening, perhaps before bedtime (about the day that has just ended). For the story-tellers among us, try writing about the best thing that happens to you each day for the next three weeks. Again, morning people will do this in the morning (about the day before) and night people will do this in the evening (about the day that is ending). For those of you who don’t enjoy writing, I’d like to suggest a drawing of some kind that reflects the good in your day (every day for the next three weeks). For those of you who don’t enjoy writing, I’d like to suggest a drawing of some kind that reflects the good in your day (every day for the next three weeks). 13

Choose a journal or a notebook with unlined pages and create a one-sentence or a one-word description for each drawing that you make. Allow the description to reflect the beauty in the drawing. At the end of this process, you’ll have a beautiful collection of grateful illustrations. If you’d prefer to collage instead of draw, that’s fine, too. Once the three weeks have passed, ask yourself how this process went. Take a few minutes to record your thoughts in your journal or notebook – and then read it back to yourself once you’ve finished.

Chances are - you may find yourself viewing life from a totally different lens. And when your view of life has changed, you become more aware of the synchronicities around you - each one carrying their own message that you are indeed on the right path. And it’s here that you’ll see the law of attraction at its best. Good energy attracts good energy. So the thoughts and intentions that you send out into the world are coming right back to you - like a magnet. And the more you journal with gratitude, the more you’ll have to be grateful for.

Tina M. Games Author of of Journaling by the Moonlight: A Mother's Path to SelfDiscovery (an interactive book with an accompanying deck of 54 journaling prompt cards). As a certified creativity coach and life purpose intuitive, she is the "Moonlight Muse" for women who want to tap into the "full moon within" and claim their authentic self, both personally and professionally. 14

Shine now into the New Year

Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s new energy to access

PEACE IN CHEER

Not Everyone is Full of Cheer How to Deal with the Miserable By Diana Dentinger

Some people “like” to be miserable. Who knows why, but we have all met someone who is a party pooper. When everyone else is happy and excited, there can often be that one person who brings drab, burden and “negative energy” to the scene. Unfortunately, for as much as fun, lightness of spirit and positive vibes are contagious, the same is true for “heaviness”. Have you ever been laughing, joking around and having a great time with a group of people and then in walked someone who had the “power” to take away the cheer? Well, for now, we will just call this person “miserable”. And they do have power if you allow it! The miserable person has really worked hard to be this way. He or she has has put time, energy and thought into how to live in constant dissatisfaction. Most people strive to be happy, fulfilled and satisfied with their lives. This person, instead, does the opposite. This person actually finds it beneficial to be miserable!

The miserable feel sorry for themselves. And they want to you to feel sorry for them too. Beneath that “sorry” is even guilt. Either they want you to feel guilty because “you are the cause” of their misery (in their opinion) or they want you to feel guilty because “you are happy” for all the wrong reasons! They might make you feel like your happiness is shallow, whereas they have really experienced life ... and you don’t understand! Just shake it off, it’s not true. They don’t put effort into changing or into expecting good for themselves. That way they aren’t disappointed if nothing great happens to change their misery. It is a loop that is hard to get out of.

For example a miserable person could ask you to be extra quiet on Christmas day because all the noise from the toys is upsetting, or asks you why you are so excited, or questions the whole holiday period since there is so much misery in the world. Rightly so, but often this person is quite far from a war torn country, real poverty or fatal or epidemic disease. In my coaching career I have met hundreds of people. Each one shares very personal life experiences with me. Some of them had gone through things that I wouldn’t wish on my worse enemy. Some of them could be “justified” to stay in an emotion like “miserable” because of the intensity of the difficulties they met. But when clients approach me it is because they have decided that the life they have lived and co-created for themselves is not what they want. The miserable person has not decided to change and you can’t decide for them! Over the holidays these people stick out like a sore thumb. Stop investing your time convincing them to change! Just reply peacefully to their observations and then continue on your way.

Remember that their state of miserable has a stronghold over them. For example, they can’t help it but to start conversations about how much things cost and they want to argue with you about how much you spend. Just tell them: “Yes, you’re right. I will pay attention to the expenses.” And then continue being happy. They can’t help it but to misinterpret your intentions. Whatever you do, they take it personally as if you deliberately set out to ruin them. Be sincere and just tell them: “Yes, you’re right, I sometimes ...” And then continue being happy. They can’t find things to be thankful for or optimistic about. Be sincere and just tell them: “Yes, things are terrible, there are so many horrible accidents, terrorist attacks and natural disasters out there.” And then continue being happy. Don’t fall into the miserable person’s traps. It will make you miserable too. Find a peaceful way of conversing, telling them they are right while finding others to be with who prefer joy and happiness. Help your children notice how a miserable person conducts their life without any judgement! Miserable has a hold on them and often a negative example reinforces the positive you want for your children.

Diana Dentinger For almost 25 years, Diana has been a mom of 4 kids, a Corporate Trainer, a Personal Development Coach and has helped hundreds of people gain more self confidence and fulfillment in their lives. She uses a tool that she created that gets to the heart of every person: their own individual NEEDS. She offers complimentary consultations to help you be a greater example for your kids. 17

Self Love and Self Care

is the best way to care for others

Happy Holidays

PEACE IN READING

What You Teach With a Book Brilliant Books Gift List By Dr. Connie Hebert

Here is a tip for building comprehension and critical thinking skills: Ask kids questions that require MORE than a simple YES or NO answer. Watch what happens! Here are some wonderful books and ways you can use them to catch “the teachable minute” with your kids! 1. Little Critter: The Best Yard Sale by Mercer Mayer: The family cleans out the house and garage. I would teach about team work, counting money and making change, or selling or giving things away to others who may be able to use them or who may have been involved in a natural disaster. 2. Airport by Byron Barton: Use this book to teach children about how passengers arriving at the airport to go through various activities to get their luggage ready before takeoff. 3. Garden Wigglers: Earthworms in Your Backyard by Nancy Lowen: This book would be used to teach vocabulary and processes that would go along with a classroom worm habitat. Part of the science curriculum. 4. Ferryboat Ride by Anne Rockwell: Consider this book as a nonfiction text to teach the concept of the ferry boat and how a man saw a problem and solved it. Begin to instill the process of problem solving.

5. Irma the Flying Bowling Ball by Tom Ross: This book is an excellent choice to begin to teach, through illustration, the difference between fiction and nonfiction. The bowling experience is completely fictional in the beginning of the book and the illustrations are wonderful. The bowling ball “sees” something and she takes on a human persona. 6. Camp Out! The Ultimate Kid’s Guide by Lynn Brunelle: This book has a wonderfully detailed illustrated table of contents. The pictures are then represented on9. the first page of the chapter. It would allow the young student the ability to actually use a table of contents at the age of 4. 7. Hey, Little Ant by Phillip and Hannah Hoose: This book could be used to teach children to see things from someone else’s point of view. 19

8. Olivia and the Rain Dance by Maggie Testa: This silly book could be used to introduce the ways people depend on rain and water.

16. King Bidgood’s in the bathtub by A. Wood: This Caldecott Honor Book has such wonderful illustrations that would be fantastic for teaching about details in stories.

9. I can bowl! by Linda Johns: This book is great for teaching kids to keep trying and believe in themselves when they try new things.

17. Busy boats (Amazing machines) by T. Mitton: This book is useful for teaching during a transportation unit on how things move and ways to get around on land or in water. It highlights many different types of boats.

10. Garfield Goes Camping by Jim Kraft: Garfield is always good for teaching children how silly some behaviors are! This book could be used to teach a child about camping and how you really have to “rough it” by leaving the electronics at home. 11. Adios, Tricycle by Susan Middleton Elva: Suggested for teaching basic Spanish words and that it is okay to grow and try new things. 12. Albert, the Dog Who Liked to Ride in Taxis by Cynthia Zarin – This book could be used as an example for writing about adventures and where they might lead. 13. Our yard is full of birds by A. Rockwell: This book helps to teach kids what kind of animals might be in yards. In addition to birds, the class could discuss what other animals would live in a front or back yard. 14. Gorilla garage by M. Shulman: This wonderful book is excellent for teaching rhyming words, such as ‘ sputtered’ and ‘muttered’ or ‘road’ and ‘towed’. There are many pairs of rhyming words in the story to highlight this concept. 15. S is for s’mores: A camping alphabet by H. F. James: Teachers could use this book to teach about different landforms in different camping areas, such as rivers, beaches, forests, mountains. The illustrations are an opportunity to visit these places.

18. Guinea Pig in the Garage by Ben M. Baglio: When Mandy asks Rachel to look after a neighbor’s guinea pigs, Rachel is so excited. She feels that by showing her parents how responsible she is, they will allow her to have a pet of her own! Things take a turn for the worse when one comes up missing. Great for discussing responsibility for animals. 19. There’s an Alligator Under my Bed by Mercer Mayer: This is a story about a boy who believed there was an alligator under his bed and he locked it in the garage. The story is written in first point and would be a good book to use in identifying point of view and the effect it has on the reader’s understanding of the story. 20. Tubtime by Elvira Woodruff: In this story sisters are taking a bubble bath and get into mischief as they blow all sorts of bubbles of different sizes and shapes. This story can lead to a science experiment and explore the properties of air, water, color and light. 21. Corduroy’s Hike by Don Freeman: This is a story about Corduroy getting lost while on a hike when he was not even supposed to of been on the trip to begin with. This is a good story to use to teach children about what actions need to be taken when someone gets lost.