Identity Accounts for Catholic Women

Religious Research Association, Inc.

Different Identity Accounts for Catholic Women Author(s): Elaine Howard Ecklund Reviewed work(s): Source: Review of Religious Research, Vol. 47, No. 2 (Dec., 2005), pp. 135-149 Published by: Religious Research Association, Inc. Stable URL: http://www.jstor.org/stable/3512046 .

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DIFFERENT IDENT'ITYACCOUNTS FOR CATHOLIC WOMEN ELAINE HOWARDECKLUND RICE UNIVERSITY REVIEWOF RELIGIOUSRESEARCH2005, VOLUME47:2, PAGES 135-149

Through interviews with thirty-seven individuals, I compare personal "identity accounts"for womenwho agree with Churchdoctrines,those who disagreeand leave the Church,and those who disagree and remainloyal to Catholicism.Surprisingly, womenwho leave and womenwho agree withCatholicdoctrineshavesimilaraccounts for what it means to be a Catholic.Thecentralpart of thispaper is devotedto understandingwomenwho are dissatisfiedand remaincommittedCatholics.Thesewomen view Catholic identityas negotiable,finding meaning and voice in theirparish and in the wider Church.Thisgroup also believes in their own abilities to makechanges in the doctrines of the Church,revealing that individualistreligious identities may actuallyfoster commitment.Findingsexpandresearchon religiousidentitiesand have implicationsfor the relationshipof personal identityaccountsto institutionalchange. omen respond in a variety of ways to religions that place constraintson their leadership.Some see a contradictionand decide to leave mainstreamreligion (Stocks 1997). Othersremainpartof religious organizations,but switch from conservativeto more liberalinstitutions.Womenmay also be fully partof religions where they have a limited role, and find empowermentin conservativeideologies (Griffith1997; Manning 1999). Otherwomen deal with limits to leadershipby forming alternativereligious communities while maintaininga traditionalreligious identity (Dillon 1999; Manning 1999).The CatholicswhomMicheleDillon (1999) studies,for example,remainCatholic but expend their major energies outside of local congregations, throughinvolvement in efforts aimed at reformingthe doctrinesof the Church.Othersdeal with patriarchalhierarchy by separatingreligion from the rest of their lives. For example, Christel Manning (1999) arguesthata womanwho is partof conservativereligionandremainsa feministmay be compartmentalizingwork and religious identities,believing in gender equality at work and genderhierarchyin her religious community.

Yet, none of these ways women respondto patriarchalreligionsadequatelyaddressesthe questionof how women negotiatepersonalreligiousidentitiesas well as whatkindsof identities are more or less likely to foster loyalty to religionsthatlimit the role of women. Here I ask, first,how women understandtheirown religiousidentitiesin light of official Catholic teachings that limit their role. Second, I ask how such identities are reflected in different action strategies.Perhapsmost illuminatingfor theoristswho try to connect identity constructsto changes in institutionsare findingsaboutwomen who have strongdisagreements with Catholicdoctrinesand remaincommittedto Catholicism.For some of these women, being able to negotiatethe contentof theiridentitiesas Catholicsandfind meaningandvoice withinCatholicismfostersloyaltyin the midstof dissatisfactionandoffersa particularaction strategyfor changesto the largerChurch.These findingsbroadenresearchon religiousiden-

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Reviewof Religious Research tities and religious individualism,and have implicationsfor eventualchanges to Catholic institutions.

THE CHANGING PLACE OF WOMEN IN THE CHURCH The place of women in the CatholicChurchhas broadenedconsiderably.Severalstructuraldevelopmentswithinand outsideChurchinstitutionshave madeincreasesin women's leadershippossible.' RichardSchoenherrandLawrenceYoung(1993) were amongthe first to publish systematicdemographicresearchaboutthe U.S. priest shortage,arguingthat a shortagein priestscreatedthe conditionsfor a differentdistributionof power,definitionof goals, and structuralchanges in the Church(SchoenherrandYoung 1993). One directconsequence was that women began to fill many of the vacantpositions left by the shortage (Wallace 1991). Changes to Catholic doctrineresultingfrom the Second VaticanCouncil (1962-1965) increasedthe participationof laity in ministryto the local Church.Centrally importantto this work, the council made theological provision for more female leaders.

Womenbegan to fulfill roles such as diocesanchancellor,altarserver,eucharisticminister, andlector- positionsthey were unableto hold beforethe council (SeidlerandMeyer 1989).

Changesin women's roles and in the economy provideda societal contextfor women to expect greateropportunitiesfor leadershipin all spheres.Beginning in the 1960s and continuingto the present,the numberof women in the paid laborforce consistentlyincreased.

More women had college and graduatedegrees, giving them upwardmobility in the labor force.2In addition,the statisticaldominanceof the "traditionalfamily"beganto decline. In 1990, only twenty-sixpercentof householdswere comprisedof marriedcouples with children.In abouthalf of those, the motherworkedoutside the home.3Propelledby new societal opportunities,women began to re-thinktheirroles in traditionalreligiousorganizations, includingthose in the CatholicChurch.

Changesin Catholicstructuresand institutions,such as those surroundingthe VaticanII council (Wilde 2004) and those outside the Church,such as changes in expectationsabout the roles of women,revealwhy some womenaretakingleadership.Theseexplanations,however,do not sufficientlyexplainhow Catholicwomen constructdifferentpersonalidentities as Catholics in light of official Churchteachingsthat place limits on women's leadership.

Althoughwomen's roles in Catholicparishesarevaried,the official doctrinesof the Church continueto constraintheirrole.Womenarenot able to be ordainedas priestsor serveas deacons, andin manyparishestheyarealso restrictedfromfillingotherministryroles.In essence, Catholicwomen are situatedwithina patriarchalorganization-with an enduringsocio-historicalcontextthathas traditionallymarginalizedwomen theologicallyand sociologically.

Some women deal with these limits by leaving the Church.Otherwomen startorganizationsthatdo notpracticeofficialChurchteachingsandhavea moreopenapproachto women's leadership(Dillon 1999;Farrell1996). Most researchon women's loyaltyor defectionfrom the churchhas not been comparative;it does not explainthe differentkindsof accountsthat women give for theirloyalty to or exit from the Churchand how such identitiesarereflected in the differentstrategiesof defectionfromthe Churchaltogether,doctrinalsteadfastness, or selectiveappropriation of doctrine.This is a significantresearchoversight.Doing grounded studiesthatexaminehow the women who makethese differentchoices explaintheirreligious identitiesis the first crucialstep to understandinghow individualscreateidentitiesat odds with institutionswhile remainingaligned with those institutions.Such researchwill also predictwhat kinds of identityconstructswill potentiallylead to institutionalchange.

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DifferentIdentityAccounts IDENTITY ACCOUNTS Identitycan be best categorized at differentlevels of analysis (Owens 2003). An individual'spersonal identityis often relatedto a particularsocial network,being partof a social networkof otherwomen or a networkof otherCatholics.Scholarsincreasinglyagree that, because people are affiliatedwith more thanone social network,individualshave multiple personalidentities(Owens 2003). Specific social contextsoften help a persondecide which identityis most salientat a given time. At anotherlevel of analysis, identitiesalso have the potentialto be collective, forming the basis for political mobilization. Social movements resultfrom collective identities,where individualssharea common consciousnessoriented towardsaction.

The currentdiscussionis primarilyconcernedwith personalidentityformation:how indiof whatit meansto negovidualsdefinethemselves,in this case, vis-a-vistheirunderstanding I tiate religious identities within the Catholic Church. am particularlyinterestedin what I call "identityaccounts,"the kinds of patterneddiscourse that individualsin certainsocial locations use to describe who they are in relationto the institutionsin which they participate. HereI see religiousidentityaccounts,in particular,as the discourse,motives,or moral boundariesthatan individualdevelops to explainher place in the world and the distinction between otherswho are and who arenot partof her religion.I take aspectsof this definition from other scholars who have studied the moral content of personal identity negotiation (Lamont1992; Wuthnow1991). Here I am most interestedin the process by which identities are developed to legitimate what appearto be the inconsistentframeworksbetween a commitmentto genderegalitarianismand to traditionalCatholicism.4 Scholarswho studyreligion have takendifferentapproachesto religious identities.Survey researchon religiousidentitymightlead us to believe thatsuch identitiesareoften fixed.

An individualis a Protestantor a Muslim and has an identityas partof thatparticularreligious group.However,sociologists of religionareincreasinglystudyingthe extentto which religiousidentitiesarefluid andnegotiated,even identitiesthatareunderthe umbrellaof the same religion.In particular,as relatedto genderand sexuality,therearemultiple-although often patterned-gender negotiationsaboutwomen's roles and activitiesamong those who are part of the same religion (Ammerman2003; Dillon 1999; Gallagher2003; Thumma 1991). Forexample,Dillon (1999) finds thatCatholicswho feel institutionallymarginalized from the structureof the CatholicChurchare still able to constructan identitybased on the communaltraditionsof Catholicism.Read and Bartkowski(2000) arguethat religious and gender identities often vary between Muslim women who choose to wear the veil, even though outsiders might perceive all veiled women to have conservativeIslamic religious identities.The women I studied may also appearconservative,since they adhereto many Catholicdoctrinesand spendtheirprimarytime in local parishactivitiesratherthanin what Michele Dillon has called pro-changeorganizationsaimedat changingcore doctrinesof the Church(Dillon 1999). However,all of these women stressedin theiridentityaccountsthat they have agency in determiningwhat it means to be a Catholic,and many thinkthat their personal appropriationof Catholic identity could actually lead to changes in the broader Church(Mannand Kelley 1997).5 Partof understandinghow Catholic women negotiatereligious and gender identities is found throughattentionto the institutionallevel of the Church:to the particulardoctrines thatinfluencethe roles of women.Anotherpartof understandingthis processis found at the level of organizations,throughanalysis of how Catholicparishesappropriatelargerinstitu137

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Reviewof Religious Research tions and the kinds of specific roles thatwomen fulfill in parishes.Studyingwomen's roles in the CatholicChurchonly from the level of institutionsand organizations,however,does not adequatelyaccountfor differencesin identityconstructionbetween individualwomen who participatein local parishes.Such researchneglects to answerthe centralquestionof how womenpersonallynegotiatethe boundariesbetweenloyaltyto an organizationandloyinstitutions,especially when such loyalties mean thatthey must alty to extra-organizational endurespecific institutionalpracticesthatconstraintheirfull participation.

A broaderconceptionof women's loyalty is found throughmoving the level of analysis frominstitutionsandorganizationsto individuals,and specificallythroughaskingwhatkind of personalidentityaccountswomen with differentrelationshipsto the Churchprovidefor being Catholicor if thereare any patternsin how Catholicwomen constructtheirreligious identities.Throughstudyingwomen's personalidentities,I discovereddistinctivelydifferent understandingsof whatit meantto be a Catholicamongwomen who largelyagree with Catholicdoctrines,those who decide to exit the CatholicChurchbecause of theirdissatisfaction,and those who disagreewith Catholicdoctrinesregardingthe place of women, yet remainloyal to the Church.Thesefindingsarticulatetherelationshipbetweenidentityaccounts and the statusof women as Catholics.They also have implicationsfor social changes in the broaderCatholicChurch.

METHODS Between fall 1999 and summer2000 I interviewedthirty-twowomen who were active membersof a Catholicparish.The parisheswere partof a largerstudyof Religion andFamily in UpstateNew York(Edgell 2005). Specifically,the women I interviewedfor this study were from six differentparishes.6I also interviewedfive women who had been activemembers of a parish,yet decided to leave the Churchbecause of a perceivedlack of opportunities for women in leadership.In totalI completedthirty-seveninterviews.I chose women in these six parishesbecause the churchesin some ways had similarstructurallocations, yet were locatedin threedifferentcommunitycontexts.At the time of this study,in each parish women had recentlybeen or currentlywere pastoralassociatesas well as heads of pastoral, finance,and parishcouncils. Table 1 describesthe parishesin greaterdetail.

In each parish,I interviewedwomen in formalleadershipas well as those who regularly attendedthe parishbut were not leaders.7My respondentswere all white, US citizens, and differedin educationalattainmentfromhigh school degreeto doctorate.I also attendedservices andgatheredwritteninformation,such as thataboutthe orderof worshipin each church.

I received verbalpermissionto study the parishfrom the priest in each churchand found women to interviewthroughlooking in the churchdirectoryand bulletinsfor women listed as formalleaders.8These includedpastoralassociates(in most of the parishespastoralassociateswereresponsiblefor parishmanagementandcounselingparishioners),headsof finance councils, or those in anotherleadershiprole. I was often able to meet these women through the course of attendingservices and then set up meetingswith them.The otherrespondents were eitherreferredto me by women in parishleadershippositions or I met them through attendingservices. My rationalefor selecting respondentswas to interviewequal numbers of women in official leadershippositions, both those who workedfull-time in a paid position for the parishandthose who workedfull time in otherjobs, yet servedthe parishas volunteerleaders.I also wantedto interviewthose who were actively involvedin a parishbut 138

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DifferentIdentityAccounts Table 1: Characteristics of Parishes

Parish/Characteristic

St. Matthew St. Mark St. Luke St. John St. Anne St. Mary

Numberof Full TimeParish priests 1 1 1 1 1 1

MeanNumberof CommunityContext Parishionerswho attendweekly services 500 Urban 500 Urban 1000 Urban 475 Suburban 1000 Suburban 600 Small-TownAcademic

*Informationtakenfrom Religious LeaderInterviews,Religion and Family Project,see (Edgell 2005).

were not in any official leadershipposition.9In additionto interviewingparishleaders, I chose other women to interview througha modified form of the snowball sample, where respondentsrefer the researcherto other respondentswho are in a similar social location.

However,to increase the variety of women in the parish I interviewed,I starteddifferent snowball chains in each of the parishes. I also interviewed five women in the same geographicallocationwho hadpreviouslyattendeda parishbutat the time of ourinterviewwere no longer churchmembersbecause of disagreementswith core Catholicdoctrines.

Forthis paper,I analyzedportionsof the interviewswhereI askedrespondentsabouttheir religious history,experiencewith Catholicparishespriorto the one currentlyattendedand dissatisfactionor affirmationof Churchteachings.AlthoughI did interviewa small group of womenwho left the Church,I didnot selectrespondentswho remainedcommittedCatholics based on theiragreementor disagreementwith specific Catholicdoctrinesaboutthe role of women. However,if a respondentexpresseddissatisfactionwith Catholicdoctrines,I asked why she remaineda Catholic.The interviewswere semi-structuredand lasted from fortyfive minutesto over two hours.I receivedverbal,recordedpermissionto tapethe interviews and I personallyconductedand transcribedeach interview.I then coded the interviewsfor themesrelatedto how each womanunderstoodwhatit meantto be a Catholicor the reasons why she decided to leave Catholicism. I paid particularattentionto how my respondents viewedthe doctrinesof the Church,andhow theynegotiatedtheirdisagreementsin the course of constructingan identityas a Catholic.

While doing interviews,I talked aboutmy own religious backgroundonly when asked by a specific respondent.In most cases respondentsdid ask me if I was a CatholicandI told them thatI hadbeen raiseda Protestant.'?

Upon request,I providedwrittentranscriptsof the interviewsto make surethatthe transcriptswere correct.Further,I mailed all respondentsa writtenreportof the researchfindings afterthe completionof the study.

The particulardatacollectionactivitieswere generatedfroma researchfocus on how individualwomen constructidentities.This type of informationcould only be obtainedthrough listening to respondentdiscourse about what it means to be Catholic, or about how their 139

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Reviewof Religious Research movementfrom being Catholicto leaving Catholicismwas negotiated.In particular,I was interestedin how women understandtheir commitmentto and/ordissatisfactionswith the centraldoctrinesof the Church.To this end, I did not test specific hypotheses, but used a groundedtheory approachto data analysis, allowing multipleidentityaccountsto emerge duringthe analysisprocess(StraussandCorbin1990).The findingsthatresultfromthis data collection arelimitedby the fact thatthe respondentswere not a representativesampleof all US Catholicwomen.However,the goal of this researchwas not to generalizefromthis small groupto the universeof Catholicwomen or even to otherwomen who have dissatisfaction with the doctrinesof the Churchand remainCatholic.Rather,the goal was to show several specific ways women within these local parishesnegotiatedidentityaccountsas Catholics in light of Churchdoctrinesthatofficially limit theirrole.

CATHOLIC IDENTITI'IES The womenI talkedwith createdCatholicidentitiesin distinctyet coherentways.Women with whatI called a "traditionalidentity"gave an accountfor whatit meantto be a Catholic that included submittingto Catholic doctrine.Several told me they generally agreed with currentdoctrinesabout the role of women in the Church.These women respondedto the place of women in the Churchby believingthatChurchteachingand authorityoughtto dictate their beliefs about women's parishroles. Anothergroup of women seemed to have a very differentapproach.This groupof womeneventuallydecidedto leave Catholicismlargely because of disagreementsover the place of women. Surprisingly,however,this second group,too, thoughtthatbeing Catholicmeantfollowing Churchteachings.Fora thirdgroup of women, the groupof women with which this paperis most concerned,being dissatisfied with Catholicteachingactuallyled to more Churchloyalty.However,this groupof women had a personalidentityaccountthat stressed"individuallynegotiatedidentities."For these women,havingmeaningandvoice in the widerChurch,andin particularin theirlocal parish, was a significantpartof remainingloyal.

Traditional Identity Accounts Womenwith traditionalpersonalCatholicidentitiestook theirideas aboutwhatit meant to be Catholicdirectlyfrom Churchteachingsaboutthe place of women. For some of these women, similarto those Griffith(1997) studiedin the evangelicalwomen'sAglow organization,adheringto a traditionalreligiousidentityeven broughta sense of empowermentand protectionfrom what seemed like the rootlessmooringsof the outside world.For example, in her early forties, Joan attendsa parishin a suburbancommunity.She is a stay-at-homemotherand volunteersas the directorof the food pantryfor her parish.When I askedher if women in her parishever give the homily she responded: He [thepriest]did have her [formerdirectorof religiouseducation]do a homily once. I don't know if he had her readthe gospel. Thatwas the only time I ever heardof. Sistermighthave done a homily once. But it goes back to the old school. I like the priestdoing the homily.

Joan is actively involved in her parishand duringour interview seemed satisfied with the presentdoctrinesof the Church.Joannegotiatesher personalidentityas a Catholicthrough accepting a fairly traditionalistposition about the role of women. Even when her parish priest allowed a woman to give the homily, Joan felt discomfort. Overall, Joan had little 140

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DifferentIdentityAccounts tension with the Church'sview of women in ministry and did not believe women should be priests or have a greaterrole in other leadershippositions. Joan put herself in contrast to women who are fighting for more equality in the Churchand when I asked her in what ways, if any, the women's movementhad influencedthe CatholicChurch,she responded: No, I wouldn't say so. See I don't really get involved in that. I think it is ridiculous.... I do what I am going to do. If they don't want me then I won't go there.That is all thereis to it.

Womenlike Joan who have traditionalpersonalidentities are awarethere are women in the Churchwho do not agree with Catholicdoctrinesaboutthe role of women. Because of this awareness,even though traditionalwomen basically agree with Catholicdoctrine they still negotiatewhat it means to be a Catholic I also interviewedJill, a retirednursingassistantin her late sixties. Jill attendeda suburban parishand spent many hours a week volunteeringfor her church.She has been a lifelong Catholic and told me: "I love my parish."Jill said the only tension she has aboutthe place of women in the Churchis that women currentlydo too much work because of the priest shortageand many feel thatthey are "doingthings the parishpriest should probably be doing."Laterin our discussion Jill told me thatthe priest shortageis a serious problem in the Churchand thatmost parisheswill not surviveif they do not find a way to get more young men interestedin the priesthood.The way in whichJill interpretedmy questionabout women's roles in the Churchrevealedaspects of her identityaccount.She views the priest as the centralleaderof the church.AlthoughJill accepts it as a necessity to keep the parish going, women fulfilling positions thatpriestsshouldbe filling is not ideal. Ratherthanseeing the shortageas an opportunityfor morewomen to lead, Jill is botheredthattherearenot more priests. Otherresearchers,too, have shown that women are often viewed as secondbest to men in fulfilling churchleadershippositions, even in those denominationswhere women are allowed more official leadershipthanin the CatholicChurch(Fobes 2004).

These findings aboutidentityaccountsamong traditionalCatholicwomen contributeto moregeneralideas abouthow identitiesareconstructedandthe conditionsunderwhich particularkinds of identityaccountsare developed.I have shown here that,even at the individual level, constructionof religious identities does not happenin a vacuum.In these cases, even those who have little conflict with Churchdoctrinedrawon what is happeningin the largerchurch-movements thatarefightingfor an increasedrole of women (Farrell1996)when they createan accountof what it means to be Catholic.

No Longer a "Real" Catholic Most of the women I interviewed,however,voiced disagreementswith Catholicdoctrines aboutwomen'sroles.I interviewedfive womenwho haddecidedto leavethe CatholicChurch over disagreementsaboutthe place of women. Surprisingly,these women actuallyview their religious identitiesin similarways as those with no disagreements.Both groupsthinkthat being a Catholicmeans largelyobeying all Churchdoctrines.For them, Catholicidentities arefixed. These women view the meaningof being Catholicthroughthe lens of whatPatricia Hill Collinsdescribesin herwork,BlackFeministThought,as "either/or" thinking(Collins 2000). As Collins mightunderstandit, these Catholicwomen have internalizedthe either/or thinkingpromotedby the institutionsof the Churchandbelieve they have no agency in creatingtheirown meaningof being Catholic."For these respondents,eithera woman lives in 141

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Review of Religious Research

a mannerconsistent with the doctrines of the Churchor she is not Catholic. Since these women have disagreements,they view theironly option as exit.

Forexample,Margaretis in her mid-fortiesandlives in a small academictown.Margaret told me that she has had severalfrankdiscussionswith a local priest who told her that she shouldlisten to her own conscience when following Catholicdoctrine.Ratherthanproviding her with moreoptions,however,Margaretcame away fromthese discussionseven more disillusionedwith the presentChurch: I went to talkto the Catholicpriest.I said: 'Whataboutbirthcontrol,abortion,womenbeing priests, all of these things I didn't agree with?' He said thatI could thinkwhat I wantedto in my own conscience and I didn'thave to stop being Catholic... And thatwas it. I could neverbe Catholicagain.

I thoughtthis was the stupidestthing.... It was totally inconsistent.The AmericanChurchwas going to ignore the papacyon birthcontrol ... and the Pope is not really into altargirls and they ignore the papacyon that.I couldn't raise my child in an environmentwhere we were going to set the tone andrules and belong to a Churchwhere we say: Well, this is the Church'sdoctrinebut we don't really have to do that.

As demonstratedby what this priesttold Margaret,the AmericanCatholicChurchhas differentculturaltools - what Swidler (1986) has describedas "habits,skills, and styles from which people constructstrategiesof action"- for negotiatingwhatit meansto be Catholic.

Officialteachingsof the Churchemphasizethatbeing Catholicmeans adheringto all of the doctrinesof the Church.In light of VaticanII changes which give more freedomfor interpretingCatholicdoctrinesto individualparishes,however,there is also a growing stream of Catholicismthatstressesmore selective appropriationof doctrinesand more consequent negotiationof religious identities.The priestMargarettalkedwith was tryingto offer Margaretthe culturaltools to build a more individuallynegotiatedCatholicism.However,Margaretdid not use such tools to negotiateher religious identity.For Margaret,to be Catholic was to fully obey the doctrinesof the Church.

Katherineis also in her mid-fortiesand works as a professorat a Universityin a small town.She hadlittlehope the Churchwouldeverchangeandsaw few possibilitiesfor remaining a Catholic.She also believedthatto be Catholicwas to follow the teachingsof theChurch.

When I asked Katherinewhy she decidedto leave the CatholicChurch,she explained: The doctrinalthings aboutCatholicismthatmade it not worthit for me to strugglein the Catholic Churchwere relatedto a lot of issues surroundingmisogyny. I found theirposition on birthcontrol indefensible.In the way it predictablykept women in a position of hopeless dependency....

I chose a profession that was stronglymale dominated.I didn't need that crap in Churchas well.

I thinkthe structureof the priesthoodis as mucha problemin refusingprieststo marryas not allowing women to be priests.... It seems to be premised on a view that contact with women is distractingand unholy.

Katherineclearly thinks the institutionalChurchis inherentlysexist. When I asked her if she would remaina Catholicif she founda parishwith a moreprogressiveview of women's leadership,she explained: I don't know where you go except out of the Churchin some way.... It would take God striking dead all of the College of Cardinalsbefore we get any structuralchange thatwould be of any significance.

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DifferentIdentityAccounts Although very different from Margaretideologically in stressing that the Churchwould haveto changestructurallyanddoctrinallyfor herto acceptan identityas a Catholic,Katherine was like Margaretin thatshe thinksthereis only one option for being a Catholic.Either an individualparticipatesfully in the doctrinesof the Churchor she is not a Catholic.Since she believes changes to Catholic structuresand institutionsare unlikely,Katherinesees no option except to leave.

Personally Negotiated Identity Accounts There is anothergroup of women for whom disagreementswith centralCatholic doctrinesare also a dominantconcern.Unlike women who choose exit from the Church,however, this group negotiates complete identities as Catholics in the midst of tension with Catholicdoctrine.

Like women who agree with the doctrinesof the Church,dissatisfiedwomen also told me thathaving an identityas a Catholicis centrallyimportantto theirlives. The surprising partis how the contentof personalidentity accountsdifferedfrom those of the traditional women.It is significantthatdissatisfiedwomendo not believeidentitiesareascribedor fixed.

For them, being a Catholic is not primarilyabout upholding the doctrinalaffiliation into whichone is bornor havingallegianceto an institutionalChurch.It is somethingone becomes and negotiatesto fit her life. For example, Rebecca, in her early forties, is a stay-at-home motherand attendsa parishin a small academiccommunity.She told me thatshe disagreed with severalcentraldoctrinesin the Church,buthadfreedomto choose the doctrinesin which she wantedto believe, Because a lot of these doctrinesare man-made.... If I thinkof what the basics are. If I say that I believe in God, what are the basics? God is love. How you treatother people matters.How you live your life matters.Those are the things that I agree with. I think we should treatother people with compassion. I like to treatotherpeople how I want to be treated.The basic things ... I am in agreementwith. The things like, priestscan't be married.Well, they were marriedfor a long time.

And then, somethinghappened....That's a man-madething. I don't really feel dissonanceabout that.

Rebecca believes she has agency in deciding which doctrinesof Catholicismshe will take and which she will leave when forming her idea of what it means to be Catholic. Such accountsconfirmand extend to the areaof religious identityformationthe recentfeminist theories that view gender identity as a negotiatedratherthan a fixed construct(Read and Bartkowski2000).

Meaning Among the women who thinkthatidentitiesas Catholicsareindividuallynegotiated,two distinctaspectsof identityaccountsemergedfromanalysesof these data.Womenmost often mentionedthatfinding"meaning"in Catholicismand in theirlocal parishesis a significant partof being a Catholic.Among boththe women who workedfor theirparishesin paidpositions and those who were volunteers,meaningfulwork was describedas thatwhich "made a difference,""helpedothersunderstandthe Catholicfaithbetter,""realizethereare different approachesto Catholicism,"or "buildcommunitywith those who arepartof a common traditionor sharecommongenderegalitarianvalues."Meaningis particularlyimportantfor this groupof women when it is juxtaposedwith currentor previousemploymentoutsidethe 143

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Reviewof Religious Research church.These women fully acknowledgetheir disagreementswith Catholic doctrinesyet they remainloyal, in partbecausethey areable to do meaningfulservicein the midstof their particularCatholiccommunity,work thatis especially significantin comparisonto secular work.

Beth attendsa congregationin a small academictown and is in her mid-forties.She has seriousdisagreementswith Catholicdoctrinesaboutthe place of womenin the Church.Beth believes the Churchshould allow women in all leadershiproles, includingthe priesthood.

She also worksoverfiftyhoursa week as a pastoralassociatefor herparish,workthatinvolves doing pastoralcounseling, giving occasional homilies during Sunday services, directing parishprogramsanddoing the Mass (Wallace1992).2 I askedher why, when she could find otherjobs that might provide more genderequality than her parishwork, she stays in her role as a pastoralassociate.Beth answeredby talkingaboutthe meaningshe finds: You probablyhave a sense of the role of women in the Churchand I wasn't sure if therewas one.

[Yet] I found that I went from ten to forty or fifty hoursa week and I was exhaustedand I said: "I am in love with this work."

It is clear from this quote thatBeth had initial misgivings aboutworkingfull-time for her parishbecause of limits to women's leadershipin the Church.However,afterworkingfor her parish,Beth said she fell "in love with this work."

Josephinealso finds meaningthroughthe work she does in her local parish.Josephine andBeth arenot in similarstructurallocations.In her mid-forties,Josephinelives in a more impoverishedcommunitythanBeth and worksfor the nationalparkservice in her area.She comparedher experiencein her currentparishto that in previousparishes.Josephinetold me that she finds in her parisha place where "my daughtercan be fully involved and my own work as a lay ministeris valued."

Sarahis the directorof educationat a suburbanparish,a paidpositionthatinvolvesdirecting programsthat teach Churchdoctrineto both childrenand adults. Sarahsays she finds meaningin herworkas a directorparticularlybecauseshe is ableto help girlscome to understandimportantpieces of women's history: Women'srights are really importantto me. And being able to vote is really importantto me and I think it is importantfor girls to know the background.

According to Beth, Josephine,and Sarah,partof the reason that they remain so involved in their specific parishes and in the broaderChurchis because they find meaning. In the case of Sarahand Beth, meaning comes throughpaid work for the parishand in the case of Josephine, throughher volunteerlabor.This finding expands understandingabout the relationshipof meaningto religious loyalty and identity.Even women who are deeply dissatisfied with patriarchalreligious doctrinehave the ability to retainpersonalidentities as religiouspeople if they see the potentialto incorporate"meaning"as a centralpartof these identities.

Voice AlbertHirschman's(1970) organizationaltheoryof exit, voice, andloyalty providestheoreticalinsightto why women who desire core changes in Catholicdoctrinesmightremain committedto the CatholicChurch.He explainsthatmembersoften remainloyal when they 144

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Different Identity Accounts

disagree with the policies of an organizationif that organizationprovides them with the opportunityto bring change. Hirschmancalls this belief in one's ability to make changes possessing "voice"(Hirschman1970). Here I extend this idea to the realmof identityconstruction.

Womenwho were dissatisfiedwith core Catholicdoctrines,and who thoughtthat they could personallynegotiateidentitiesas Catholics,often includedhaving a "voice"in what happenedin theirparishand the potentialto bringchanges to the broaderChurchas partof theiraccountof Catholicidentity.Seeing religious identityas connectedto having voice in the Churchandin a local parishfiguredprominentlyin keepingdissatisfiedwomen loyal to Catholicism,even in an institutionalChurchthey saw as officially limitingtheirrole. Voice for these women referredto believing thatthey had the abilityto make changes at the local and institutionallevels of the Church.For example, Sarahsaid thatshe was troubledby the Church'sstance towardswomen in leadershipand towardsgay and lesbian Catholics.She explainedthatin herparishshe is vocal abouther opinionsandbelieves her voice will eventuallybe partof bringingchanges.

People know thatI am a 'gay-friendly'person.You can just look at my office. And they know that I am very 'warmand welcoming'to that.We also give phonenumbersout to people. Kids ask questions. I have had some parentscome to me abouttheirchildren... There is a need out there and I don't think that people know that the Churchis ready to meet that need. They still think that it is bad to be gay if you are a Catholic. And all those myths behind that. It's going to take an awful long time still for that to go away.

Sarahremainsin the Churchlargelybecause she is actively workingtowardschange in her congregation and she hopes-although it may be slow-in the larger institutions of the Catholic Church.

Debbie is the directorof religiouseducationin a parishlocatedin a small academictown.

She believes thatthereshouldbe women priestsand thatwomen more generallyshouldbe given increasedopportunitiesto lead. Even though she realizes that her opportunitiesfor leadershipwithin the CatholicChurchare limited, she remainsa Catholicto make changes in her own parish.She negotiatesvoice throughthe changes she believes she is making at the local level: And I think if we keep doing what we are doing, with preaching,I think that will influence people. When they enjoy hearing women preach, and they think they are faithfully proclaimingthe Word,then other things will naturallygo from there.

Debbie thinks she is bringingchanges throughthe kind of work she does as the directorof religious education,specifically throughher preaching.

In exercising voice at the local level, women with disagreementsengage in a form of protestinside institutions,whatMaryKatzensteinhas definedas simultaneouslyremaining committedto andparticipatingin an institutionwhile objectingto certaininstitutionalrules (Katzenstein1998). Accordingto Beth, mentionedabove, [Being Catholic] is who I am. I am in love with it. I am here as much as anyone else. I can not imagine being anywhereelse. Thereis faith that you can find here. I came into the Churchknowing aboutthe pain and the prejudice.. .I thinkI can effect change. If I didn't thinkthat,I wouldn't stay.

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Reviewof Religious Research Earlierin our discussion, Beth told me that she thinks the Catholic Churchshould allow women to be priests and shouldbe more acceptingof gays and lesbians in Churchleadership. Beth also believes her opinions are as importantas those of other Churchmembers and leadersand thatshe has the abilityto makechanges.She remarked,"I am here as much as anyoneelse."As evidenceof the significantlink betweenidentityconstructionand"voice" Beth said she would not remaina Catholicif she did not believe she could make changes.

These excerptsshow that,in contrastto otherresearch,dissatisfiedwomen do not always maintainseparateidentitiesbetween churchand other life spheres (Manning 1999). Their ability to retainloyalty can actually be found throughexpressingratherthan suppressing theirdisagreements.These examplesalso broadenunderstandingof the relationshipbetween personal identities and institutionalchange. Because having a "voice" is central to their accountof what it means to be a Catholic,these women may become partof largercollectives with those who share similarpersonalidentities.Throughchanges to local parishes, such collectives may actuallymake a differencein changingthe Church.

CONCLUSION I have shownherethatwomen who exit the Churchandwomenwho remaininvolvedyet are dissatisfiedmay have very differentways of constructingCatholicidentities. It is surprisingthatthe women who had a more traditionalview of Catholicismas well as women who exit Catholicism actually had similar ways of constructingCatholic identities. Both groups essentially believed that to be Catholic meant following all the Churchteachings.

However,it is notjust traditionalwomen who remainactiveCatholics,but also women who areable to negotiatewhatit meansto be Catholicwith genderegalitarianismandmakefinding meaningand having a voice a centralpartof Catholicidentity.

In particular,analyzingpersonalidentity accountsincreases understandingof involvement among Catholic women who are dissatisfied. Finding meaning and voice in a local parishmay not be necessaryfor dissatisfiedwomen to remainaffiliated,but might be necessaryto justify the kindof significantcommitmentto parishactivitiesandleadershipamong the women with whom I spoke. I found here thathow women viewed theirown agency in creatingidentity-whether or not they believe they have the option of choosing the content of Catholicidentity-is an importantpredictorof loyalty.Those who thinkthey have more agency in determiningwhat it means to be Catholicare able to remainloyal in the midst of disagreementwith doctrinesaboutthe place of women in the Church.This agencytranslates into very specific strategiesof action.These same womenaretryingto makechangesin their local parishes.

The findingspresentedhere are limited in theirgeneralizeabilityby severalfactors.My respondentswere not randomlydrawnfrom the populationof all US Catholic women or even the entirepopulationof women within the parishesI studied.In addition,the parishes were all located in Upstate New York.Futurestudies should take the importanceof geographiclocation and diocesan context into considerationwhen studyingthe variousidentities that Catholic women develop. These parishes might have been differentif they were locatedin a differentgeographicregion,one thatwas politicallymore conservativeor more liberal,for example.

However,this interviewdata is valuablein its ability to uncoverthe actual meaning of religious identities for this group of Catholic women. Those who do surveys of religious identityare often constrainedby theirmethodologyinto seeing religiousidentitiesas fixed, 146

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DifferentIdentityAccounts boxed concepts. Othersociologists of religion have interrogatedthis idea, seeing religious identities as more fluid. The findings presentedhere expand both of these approachesby showing the value of bringinginto questionthe idea of religiousidentitiesas either/orcategoriesandidentitiesas completelyfluid.Thesefindingsshowthatsome womenview Catholic identities as fixed constructsand others view such identitiesas more fluid and negotiated.

They indicatemore broadlythatresearchersshould be concernedaboutunderstandingthe particularconditionsunderwhich individualsthinkof identitiesas fixed and the conditions underwhich people give accountsof religious identitiesas negotiated.

These findings aboutidentityconstructspresentedhere also have implicationsfor how scholars should understandthe relationshipbetween identity accounts and social change.

Most researchon change within the CatholicChurchhas focused on the characteristicsof collectivesor the structuralconditionsthatlead to changesin institutions(SeidlerandMeyer 1989; Wilde 2004). Less work focuses on the accountsthat individualsgive for the meaning of being Catholicand how these accountsmight relateto membershipin social change organizations.Futureresearchoughtto link, in particular,the differingaccountsof women who are dissatisfiedto changes in local parishes.For example,does a higherpercentageof women who believe they have "voice"in a parishlead to an actualincreasein the leadership possibilities for women in thatparish?Focusing mainly on organizationsthat are tryingto bring changes to Catholicinstitutions,pro-changeorganizations,as at the locus of institutional change (Dillon 1999; Loseke and Cavendish 2001) may overlook how individual women are alreadybringingchangesto local parishes.I hypothesizethatwomen who think of Catholic identities as negotiatedand believe in their own agency to choose a religious identitywill have morepotentialto bringchangesto the CatholicChurchby effectingchange throughlocal parisheswhen comparedto women who think Catholic identities are fixed, believing the most significantchanges occur only at the institutionallevel of the Catholic Church.

Finally,these findings have implicationsfor connectingthe study of identityconstructs to largerissues of change within traditionalreligion. It is importantthat some dissatisfied women may find ways to maintainloyalty ratherthanexit religiousorganizations.Giventhe right conditions-when there are groupsof women who have meaning and voice in a religious organization-those who have identities that are at odds with the dominantones of their organizationmay use these identities as a resourceto form collectives and coalitions with like-mindedothers.These coalitionsmay eventuallylead to changeswithinthe context of local congregationsratherthanputtingprimarychanges in pro-changeorganizationsor leaving congregationsall together.

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS Direct all correspondenceto: Elaine HowardEcklund,PhD. PostdoctoralFellow, Departmentof Sociology, MS28, Rice University,P.O.Box 1892, Houston,TX 77251-1892, e-mail: ehe@rice.edu.Acknowledgments:Funding for datacollection was supportedby the Lilly Endowment,grant# 1996 1880-000, PennyEdgell, P.I.I would like to thankWendyCadge and Penny Edgell for their commentson an earlierversion of this paper.

NOTES 'WhenI referto the "institutionsof the CatholicChurch,"I mean the Vaticanlevel of the CatholicChurchand doctrinesof Catholicism.This definitionof institutionswould also cover specific policies or legal rules, such as workplacefamily leave laws.

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Review of Religious Research 2ElaineKroe,NationalHigherEducationStatistics:Fall, 1989:Washington,D.C.: U.S. Departmentof Education, 1989, pp.11-13.

3Statisticstakenfrom: U.S. Bureauof the Census, CurrentPopulationReports,Series P-20, No. 106, Household andFamilyCharacteristics: March1960 (Washington,D.C.: US GovernmentPrintingOffice, 1960);andCensus, Householdand FamilyCharacteristics:March1990 and 1989.

4See(Lamont 1992), in particular,pp. 5-8, and (Wuthnow1991), pp. 49-51, who both discuss identityin this way.

'See (Mannand Kelley 1997)for a reviewof approachesto identitynegotiationthatstressthe agencyof women in determiningtheirown identities.

6Thenames of all the parishesand individualsI discuss in this paperhave been changed.

7Threeof the female respondentswere womenreligious(sisters).I interviewedthese womenbecausethey were in key leadershippositionsin theirparish.Duringthe interview,however,I askedthemprimarilyaboutthe lives of women in theirparishwho were not officially partof religiousorders.

8WhileI recognizethatwomen religiousareofficially lay membersof the Church,I use the term"laywomen" to referto those who are not partof religiousorders(Wittberg1994).The women also variedin whetheror not they identifiedas feminists (Winter,Lummis,and Stokes 1994).

9Althoughtechnically all work, paid and un-paid,is consideredservice to the church,in this paperI use the term "work"to referto a full or part-timepaid position in the church.I use the term "service"to describevolunteer,non-paidlaborfor a parishor the broaderChurch.These are not exact categories,as manyof the women who workedpart-timein a paid churchpositionwere also involvedin non-paidserviceto the parishoutsideof theirofficial paid position. I try to denote these inconsistencieswhereverpossible. "'Somesociologists believe researchershave an obligation to be explain their rationalefor revealing or not revealingtheir identities(Kreiger 1991; Pierce 1995). Some choose to emphasizeaspects of theirown historyto create common groundwith those among whom they are conductingresearch(Fobes 2001). Others,for equally good reasons,stress the importanceof withholdingfacets of theiridentity.My choice had advantagesand disadvantages.Because, when asked,I told respondentsthatI was not a memberof any of these parishesand was not a Catholic,respondentsfelt they had to explain the inner-workingsof the parishmore carefully.Further,because I was not an actualmemberof the parish,I perceivedmanyrespondentsto actuallyfeel more comfortablein telling me abouttheirexperiences.

"See (Collins 2000) p. 68-69 for a furtherexplanationof "either/or"dichotomies.

'See (Wallace 1992) for a moreextensivediscussionof the role of pastoralassociateand parishadministrator.

While pastoralassociates can fulfill many differentroles, with the exception of doing the Mass, Beth's role was fairlytypical of the pastoralassociaterole.

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