THREE TIPS FOR HELPING AN EXCEPTIONAL CHILD COMMUNICATE ABOUT THEIR DAY AT SCHOOL

Three Tips for Helping an Exceptional Child

Communicate About Their Day at School

By Jessica Leichtweisz, MPS

ONE OF THE MOST CHALLENGING THINGS FOR ANY PARENT IS WHEN A CHILD CANNOT COMMUNICATE WHAT HAPPENED DURING THE SCHOOL DAY. THIS MEANS YOU HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO TAKE WHATEVER INFORMATION IS GIVEN AT FACE VALUE, AND ALL TOO OFTEN, SIGNIFICANT DETAILS ARE LEFT OUT. IT’S BECOMING INCREASINGLY COMMON TO HEAR STORIES ON THE EVENING NEWS ABOUT ABUSED CHILDREN OR KIDS WANDERING OFF IN SITUATIONS WHERE THEY LACK COMMUNICATION SKILLS. THIS IS MANY PARENTS’ BIGGEST NIGHTMARE.

However, you can proactively do things to help your child communicate what happened when you are not there, especially if there is an autism diagnosis. By implementing the three strategies we discuss in this article, you can have more peace of mind knowing you are doing all you can to keep your child safe.

STRATEGY ONE Introduce a school story template

A social story is traditionally used to teach a child how to respond in a social situation. However, a modified “social story” can be used as a way for your child to tell you what happened in their day. It can help them identify events they need assistance with, and it can also give you insights as to how things went during the school day.

You can do this by creating a story template that prompts your child to “fill in the blank.” This makes their response easy and may encourage them to share information they might not have been able to otherwise.

An example could be, “Every day, I take the bus to school. Today on the bus, I felt _____” or “During recess today, I played with _____ “ or “During math time today, Mr./Mrs. Teacher’s Name said I did a _____ job. This made them feel _____.” Another useful prompt when using a social story is to include a section that asks a child what the best and worst part of their day was.

At first, this may be challenging for your child to complete and understand, but if you practice it daily, they will learn what is expected of them, and you will gain valuable insight into their day.

STRATEGY TWO Use visuals or a communication device

Sometimes, using visuals will help a child communicate more effectively. Some children, especially those with autism, may not be able to communicate verbally, and this can be very frustrating for

you both. A communication device, such as a picture board or iPad, can help your child express themselves in ways that they cannot do otherwise. This will enable them to share their feelings and thoughts about the day even when they cannot verbally express themselves.

For example, you could say, “Tell me about your day at school,” and show pictures of them or generic visuals depicting feeling happy, sad, angry, etc.

Then they can point to how they felt in school today or respond using an iPad application. You can repeat this exercise by asking, “Who did you play with today?” and showing photos of their friends. Or you can ask, “What did you do today in school?” and show them pictures of activities.

One thing that can be a downside to using an iPad or choice board is the lack of responses. However, while your child will only respond with pre-set answers, it’s better than you asking them vocally and getting nothing in return!

STRATEGY THREE Use an “emotion thermometer”

Many children focus on one small thing during school, which can be very misleading. For example, your child might have had a great day in school, but right before dismissal, the teacher asked them to sit down, and they came home crying, saying that their teacher yelled at them. That is because due to poor executive functioning skills, many children with autism struggle with gradients of emotions.

The emotion thermometer is a simple way to help your child understand how they are feeling and that some things may make them very happy/angry or a little happy/ angry. The best way to teach this is to get an abacus like the one pictured above. For example, if your child said they are angry or that their teacher was mean, you could use the beads to have your child demonstrate whether their teacher was a little bit angry or very angry. This can help you understand the context of what happened and help your child realize and process their emotions. Use this strategy by talking about it beforehand and then demonstrating it together when you are ready, so your child understands why they are using it. This will give you a much better understanding of what took place in school.

Not all special needs children are able to communicate what happened throughout their school day. However, there are things you can do proactively to help your child connect more effectively and help you understand their world better. By implementing the preceding three strategies, you will gain better insight into your child’s school day and will gain more peace of mind.

REFERENCES:

Development and Psychopathology 18 ~2006!, 591–617 Copyright © 2006 Cambridge University Press Printed in the United States of America DOI: 10.10170S0954579406060305

Gray, C. (2000). The new social story book: Illustrated edition. Arlington, TX: Future Horizons.

Marjorie Solomon, Executive Function (EF), Encyclopedia of Autism Spectrum Disorders, 10.1007/978-3-319-91280-6, (1877-1880), (2021).

Jessica Leichtweisz, MPS, is the founder of Hope Education Services and is passionate about helping parents understand their children with autism. She authored the Amazon number one bestselling book This is Autism and has been quoted in several major media outlets including The New York Times, Forbes, and MSN. Jessica completed a master’s degree in Special Education from Manhattanville College and did her post-graduate studies in Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA) at Kaplan University. Jessica has been working with children with autism since 2008. Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/hopeeducationservices Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hopeeducationservices/