Kyiv International Session Newspaper (KIS) Issue 1

Page 1

First Issue read all about teambuilding


Editorial By M&M

The compromise. M: So, this is the first issue. What are we going to write about? M: Well, we need to cover all the Committees, and of course Eurovillage. M: Eurovillage; people running around in silly costumes and eating food with their hands. And what is so special about it? Shall we write an article covering every meal and coffee break as well? M: Mmmh… Eurovillage. M: Get back to work! We have a deadline to reach! M: Ok, good, I know, I saw three couples kissing, already on Saturday night! M: Not in my newspaper. M: Why not? The Newspaper is made to give everyone a moment to lean back and take a break from teambuilding and the nervewrecking discussions. Don`t you know that laughter is the best way to relax? M: Laugh, they can do at home. You see, we have a mission here. We can form the future of Europe through cleverly delivered messages. I want opinions! M: (laughter) M: Like teambuilding: I would like this editorial to be about how many conflicts in the world today could be solved if mediators took advantage of this tool. Parties are often very suspicious of each others, and especially for less educated armed groups, it is hard to make the transition into a political force. This could be easily changed if they knew that it would not be their negotiation skills which would determine the outcome of a peace process, and knew they would be listened to at the negotiating table. M: Boring! Committee Work is serious and exhausting enough, let`s make the newspaper fun and easy. M: But with this newspaper, we can provide more information to the participants from the world. Imagine; 10 days without the BBC, the Economist and the Financial Times! Issue 1: page

M: I think you are the only person here who actually misses that. It is the newspaper of a youth organisation, we should focus on what our young readers want. There is so much that happens during a session that you will forget when you come back home. The boring political stuff, you can read that in the resolutions. M: They would not have been here if they had no interest at all in politics! M: Sure. But they will not stay here for that long unless they have fun. M: Good. Why don`t we combine the two focuses – finding out what Europeans think about Human Rights can be quite fun! M: And the supermarket article is also about economics. M: Cool! M: Brilliant! M: Fantastic! M: Superb! M: Have I ever told you how much I love you? (The following scenes got sensored due to strong content). M&M

NAME Michel Hochstasser (CH) Martin Flatö (NO) Javier Conejos Montenegro (ES) Roxana Bucioaca (RO) Gillian O’Halloran (IE) Ivar Kvam (NO) Karolina Reszec (PO) Filip Ondra (CZ) Valentina Mina (CY) Lorenz Müller (CH) Isabella Hayward (SE) Alex Challiou (CY) Tanja Weissensteiner (AT) Marko Koplinaa (EE) Joe Flannery (UK) Lelde Benke (LT)

NICK’s M M Romeo Juliet Jane of the Jungle Tarzan Mrs. Smith Mr. Smith Cleopatra Caesar Elektra Daredevil Marge Simpson Homer Superman Lois Lane

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New dance craze explodes into civil chaos By Lois Lane and Superman

Civil Liberties’ violations. From cautious beginnings through to a booming presence, these maniacs have travelled a long distance to get here, and just like the “Energizer Bunny” kept going. And to get things started, everyone was asked to pick a word which best describes themselves. “I’m a bodyboard... it’s easier to ride,” Helen Fisher (UK) calmly announced. Thankfully, there are not too many surfing hotspots nearby for everyone to have a go. As Danny Vannucchi (chair, IT) put it, “If you boom, you don’t

really explode, you just have to go back.” With Tapio Hietamäki (FL) and Ladislav Sobotka (CZ) developing such

ing in the sand, the proposal was refined by Viviana Purina (LV). She used a stick. While it’s hard to learn so many names in a short space of time, things can never be too easy when there’s more than one person with the same name. With Anna-Maria (Anamaria) conflict number one; “I’ll be Annie (RO)”, “Ok, then I’ll be Anna-Maria(GR)”, easy. However, from everyone else’s point of view; “who’s revolutionary actions and the spokesperson?” “AnnaAnna-Maria Melachrinos(GR) Maria”. “Which one?” “ME”. and Hanna Falicka (PL), writ-

DROI II THERAPY By Mr. And Mrs. Smith

Date: 15th October 2006, Sunday Place: Sanatorium, 27 km from Kiev Medical case: DROI II / 12 committee delegates Therapist: Sille Jansen (chair, NL) Therapy type: various teambuilding games Medical History: Participating in teambuilding was the first group therapy experience for DROI II delegates. Observed Symptoms: Initially, several patients objected to the therapy. “I have not felt so violated since my childhood”, admitted Eric Kynast (GE), one of the patients. “Someone is touching me!”, panicked Paul Lavin (IE). During the human knot game, the therapist noted an apparent self-denial syndrome. She asked “Who has two hands?” and received the answer “I have none.” As the therapy proceeded, patients began showing clear signs of personal space shrinking. At the same time, their feeling of physical and mental comfort within the group increased. Yet more unexpected facts surfaced with another game, “I feel I am partly a girl”, confessed Fabien Hassan (FR). No medical comment as to that. Diagnosis: DROI II has completed the therapy successfully. The aim of the teambuilding games has been achieved according to the therapeutical agenda. Further treatment: Taking into consideration the current medical state, DROI II may leave the sanatorium within the next 24 hours. The sanatorium staff advises DROI II to change the environment and spend a week in the city centre. Printed on Konica Minolta

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Impossible is nothing By Romeo and Juliett

Your problems have got an easy solution – SEDE committee has arrived! Ailbhe Brazel (IE) wants to study physics, James Millington (UK) wants to get to the moon, Claudiu Popovici (RO) looks like a tough person, Gabriele Calabro is a hot italian, Martins Dambergs (LV) comes from the big city, Yulia Kuznetsova (RU) plays the piano, Karolina Somrova (CZ) is a drama theatre actress, Bram Vogels (BE) likes small motorbikes, Ingrid Fast (DE), Pennie Douligeris (GR) and Bram Kortekaas (NL) are prepared to face the challenges. Talking about Claudiu, James

supposed that it is true that be? he moved out from an apart- When they went for a blindfolded walk around the maple tree forest, they proved that they had chosen the right committee: Security was in the air! Martins ment to Dracula’s castle Bran. (LV) was always shouting out Claudiu’s grandfather – may- what he found on his way, so the people walking behind him got really safely to the destination. On Sunday morning, they all went back to their childhood as their personal “Big By Elektra Mum” taught them how An EYP session is truly an amazing journey for all to make those traditional its participants, but for some of us getting to the Ukrainian dolls. Gabriele (IT) EYP-hotspot Kyiv was one big adventure in itself. handcrafted a wonderful Unexpected destinations seems as if other delegates doll, as well as Kostas (GR) The Cypriot delegation got and chairs decided to be who still carries it around. more than they bargained original, and leave their lug- They also got an insight into for; not one but two trips gage in the most unusual Pussycat Defence Strategy: “Big Mum” told them that back and forth between places (e.g. in elevators). dolls are used to kick cats Warsaw and Kyiv before if they scratch them! Lucky they eventually could touch Sightseeing down. The reason for all this Some random sightseeing them, they had Martins (LV) zigzagging was fog, which done on the way here con- translating Russian… Good prevented them from land- sisted of passengers in pyja- job!

The long and winding road that leads to… Ukraine…

ing.

mas and passengers talking to themselves. The sightseeLost belongings ing continues through the Loosing luggage is usually a incredible EYP-journey, with tradition associated with the a lot of things to see and exSpanish delegations, but it perience along the way. Issue 1: page

So guys, whenever you feel down, and lost… Call for SEDE!

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Committee on Economic Affairs By Tarzan & Jane of the wild Jungle

The delegates from the committee on Economic Affairs could not be pulled apart, and were especially fond of the ever-popular coin game. This giddy committee began their weekend with challenging tasks which included lifting the stick, breaking through the spider’s web and having the cat chase the mouse. While Joosep Lassmann (EE) had problems playing the running game with the unpredictable stops, Sebastian Blümmert (DE) and Kamen Iordanov (CH) had lots of fun with the spider web. During the human knot,

ous journalist stole the delegates from their work in order to extract vital information such as the colour of their underwear, all the latest gossip, and how they are enjoying the session so far. Just for the heck of it, really. Jamie Brown (IE) and André Kotenko (UA) got to know one another very well while humped over each other. Throughout the day, a curi-

Committee on International Trade By Tarzan & Jane of the Jungle

Beginning with ball-throwing name games and followed by true or false story telling, Lot Debruyne’s (chair, BE) committee were well acquainted by dinnertime on Saturday. There were some misadventures while combating the nightline, such as Ollie Hemminki (FI) bumping into trees. Also, everyone had to bypass another committee without speaking or seeing. However, their human knot was a total success, and they managed to successfully arrange themselves on the tree trunk in the

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correct eye colour. Poor Sasha Khabchuk (UA) however, had a long distance to go, and Patrick (CH) and Albert Carrillo Sorolla (IT) had a few close calls with their balance.

By Sunday morning, after playing the Evolution game with the other delegates, they got creative in the craft room by making Ukrainian reed dolls. The boys even learned to braid hair in the

process. After a few chocolates, they went on to accomplish the picture orienteering in good time [hmm…unlike this article –Eds.] Issue 1: page


AFCO - A perfect Square By Marge & Homer

On a beautiful Saturday morning, a group of young people from every corner of Europe came together to get to know each other, to build a team but above all - to enjoy themselves in the wonderful country Ukraine. With youthful exuberance they tackled every obstacle set in their path by our President Jan-Phillipp Beck (DE) and his charming co-chair Klara Sebakova (CZ). The guidance of Adeniran Haastrup (UK) helped them overcome difficulties and land the magic stick, Vassia Anastassio (GR) led the sheep safely home and they managed to scare their chairs with a masterfully summoned monster.

After the straining first day, the AFCO’s felt the need to relax. With an early morning massage session, they embraced the final member of their group - Gaute Bugge Drangholt (NO). Moreover, they put their backs together, and as an expression of true team spirit, stood up as one. Still, the best was yet ahead. The vivid imagi-

nation of Maud Bekedam (NL) and the active Outi Hiirikoski (FI) and Sebastian King (SE) enabled the committee to build a perfect square in spite of being blindfolded. Klara was proudly stunned and admitted that it really WAS a perfect square…

Session Security By Superman

Save yourselves from the sultry scenes of the sanitarium. For some of you this may well be your first time in Kiev, indeed there are even people who have never stayed for this long away from home. So with this in mind a couple of helping phrases are necessary: Beware of the dogs; these little beauties can be lovely to look at, and indeed the lovely Labrador who the Committee on Civil Liberties named “Breakfast” is no exception. But they can get a little too friendly on these cold mornings. Issue 1: page

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Inspired: AFET1 By Mr. & Mrs. Smith

AFET one Started their day with the run Playing tricky games To learn one another’s names. Chaired by the lovely Nas They’re gonna kick some… (ooops, let it pass). That’s a wicked committee Read the poem and you’ll see. Starting with the Tiny Ana Followed smoothly by Joanna. Dream of meeting Will the Fish? My dear ladies, you just wish! Spot the smile of Eloisa Makes you think of Mona Lisa. Take a minute to hang out with Yankee To understand the meaning of the word “funky”. Try to have as much energy as Fez And you’ll easily find your way into the press (or…). Eivind’s gonna be your mate Even though he joined in late. Vienna has that spark in his eye So you never know if he’s telling the truth or a lie. And then we’ve got a guy called Chris; Look at him, check that, check this! Matthias, or if you like, “Hiker” Is he a real “Big Fat Pony” liker? Gherman, real named Matt Isn’t he playing hard to get? Don’t be afraid of the Beast from the East That’s for Roman, last but not least! It’s the Kiev’s AFET 1 Let’s move on and get the work done!

Thee Box Letter Counter: only 5!!! Thee Box is starving.

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LOOK UP!

By Daredevil and Electra, assisted by Olga Stepanchuk (organiser, ua)

Доля зробила це знову! Fate has done it again! Look up at the sky! For tonight, ten stars are missing. They are to be found in the form of Human Rights III! The first contact with the group was out of the ordinary. Upon arrival, I saw a girl introducing herself as Ambiguous

Ariane (FR), followed shortly by Kinky Katarina (EE). One of the games played was the tap game. It took about 2 minutes until the first injury. In a marvellously performed act of adrenaline rush, Energetic Elisabeth (SE) was hit by Victorious Vlada (CZ). Oh, he definitely was victorious here! Needless to say, rugby lad John Joy’s (IE) eyes sparkled at the sight of violence.

Oh, let us not forget Magnificent Marcos (PT), the youngest yet the tallest of the group; a far distance to walk when you have to do “silent lineup” accordingly. There seems to be no scarcity of love in the group. Whereas Vladimir Soukup (CC) revealed his love for his longtime sweetheart (sorry girls). Marcos Tavares (CH) revealed his love for his country, which he had never left until now. Finally, Niklas Herertz (DE) referred to his passion for snowboarding.. The stars shine even brighter with the presence of volleyball star Jelena Bratonozic (SR) and little, Marvellous Melanie (CH). And last but not least Julia Khurchakova (UA), probably one of the only Ukrainians that speak Japanese.

Even the black dog tried to join this dream team. Unfortunately, this was not doggie’s day!

Random BOX

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The fairy tale on Employment By Homer& Marge

They met underneath a wide willow; and formed a sacred circle around an ancient bone that has probably been lying there since the day before yesterday.

Under the fearless leadership of Killer Chris, people from all over Europe – from Amazing Alex (RO) to even more Amazing Adriana (ES) back to Krazzy Katie (IE) – gathered in the Ukrainian morning chill. They did not yet know that the later challenges would ultimately lead Magic Marika (LV) and Marvellous Mari (EE) blind-foldedly into the

bathroom. Following Acting Tony (BG), Sleepy Steffen (CH), Ta l k a t i v e Tereza (CZ) and Big Bart (PL), the committee got lost in the depths of the forest, accompanied by Troublesome Todor’s (FR) dirty jokes. At the end of that very perilous journey, they had to put up with the blabber of a local witch. Fortunately, Nice Nastyia (UA) could understand her and lead them to safety.

The last battle for the morning was fought in the misty forest by the lakeside against the Kingdom of Finn (chair, IE). Giants, wizards, dwarfs and Lazy Lavrentia (GR) all involved, it seemed to evolve into a battle of epic proportions. Luckily, it was resolved in true EYP spirit- with cheating and hugging.

EYP – Expect the unexpected By Caesar & Cleopatra

Ageing walls, bathrooms without curtains, five different flowery furniture patterns. Arriving here some of you might have wondered: Am I in a summer camp? And what exactly did I bring my high heels for? Well, EYP might not be exactly as you had pictured it

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in your minds, but you must know that EYP is not only about good food or five star hotels. EYP is all about the people, the emotions and the experience. Small beds and pasta for breakfast is all part of this adventure. So do not let anything stop you from living this experience to the full. Enjoy every

single minute of it; it might be you are about to have the time of your life. And remember… you are not alone. Who knows, asking the neighbour for toilet paper might be the perfect excuse for you to start a conversation with that hot delegate next door!

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A heart for dogs By Marge

The story of stray dogs around the Team Building area. Dear delegates, you might ian organiser Katya. have noticed the exceptional- Another Ukrainian orga, funly high concentration of stray nily enough, also called Katya, says:” People usually pity the poor, Stray dogs are everywhere helpless dogs and in the Ukraine, we are so feed them. Nobody really wants used to them... ” to take them in, but private households and even officdogs around the cantine and es often provide them with accomodation. In general leftovers. Same goes for the they seem to be healthy and harmless, but still be wary of them. “Stray dogs are everywhere in the Ukraine, we are so used to them that half the time we don’t even realise that they are there. Kyiv has less dogs, but still enough.”, says Ukrain-

cantine here, just look outside, there are enough dogs strolling around.” If you do believe in reincarnation, one day you might be a dog. Would there be a better place to live, than here? The cute black one is called breakfast, and no, this does not imply that we are eating dog meat.

Kiosk Empire By Superman and Mr.Smith

To talk business for a while kiosk chain is on the top of its – let us have an insight into economical growth in these local economics. Ukrainian very days. The kiosk in our complex has never had such high income as now, this miniature empire has never received such demand for confection and nicotine products as is deIssue 1: page 10

manded by an EYP session. A few hours after the delegates had arrived, first problems occurred. Due to record sales and high demand, the kiosk is now left without Snickers, Kit Kat and other goods. Hopefully, the situation will change soon, and its supply of high quality goods will resume. Final recommendation; if you do not have time to wash your teeth, go and get false ones. Printed on Konica Minolta


Go, go Gypsies of DROI I By Elektra and Daredevil

Dear friends, In the words of Martin Luther King: I have a dream that one day…. …people will help each other. Even if that means lending Finnian Hanrahan (chair, IE) a pair of boxers when all hope and baggage is lost. I have a dream; that one day, I live in a society where it is normal to wave your top around in order to express yourself like Ivan Genov (BG) did. In addition, I long for a place where incomprehensible dances are performed on a regular basis. I have a dream; that one day, individuals do not conform but rather are original, creative and follow Anna Heinen’s (DE) example and make faces out if clay instead of bears like everyone else. Moreover, that these individuals work together and accomplish great things such as delivering magic sticks safely to the ground or creating a monster. I have a dream; that one day we will be able to overcome language barriers and find common ground by using sign-language when no one can understand your Norwegian like Cecelia Torjesen (NO) My friends, it is crucial not to let failure get you down, but to keep trying to live the dream and push on through the River of Fire. When a volcano or a spider web stands in your way, ask questions like Amy Dobson (UK): “Can’t we just go around the volcano?”. However, luckily, dear friend, this is not just a dream… This is the reality of the committee on Human Rights 1. Nevertheless, do not stop dreaming!

Beware of the dark; never walk alone, you just never know when a journo may jump out! Printed on Konica Minolta

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Invasion of the Ukraine narrowly prevented By Caesar & Cleopatra

Last Saturday, the Ukranian border police has arrested a group of 13 European invaders. They have been sent to a Sanatorium outside Kiev for reprogramming. The group, calling itself „AFET II“ consists of members from various European coutries. One of them named Stanislav Beletskyi (RU) even travelled here from a Siberian province 5000 km east of Moscow. As to their objectives in the Ukraine no definite conclusion could yet be drawn. However they claim to try finding a resolution for the present conflict in Palestine. Moreover their information on the Ukrainian climate was apparently faulty. Still the Irish prisoner, Ryan O’Hagan

(IE), displayed high spirits spiting his acute lack of clothing. Their personal reprogramming instructor, Eric Kat-

skowski (chair, EE), decided to use a sublte technique of memory alternation: Soon doubts arose: Is Joachims

Lommelen (BE) room tidied up or not? Was Magdalena Biereder (AT) reading Kant or Sartre before she left? Sunday 15th an additional member, Solveig Gronnestad from Norway, was arrested when trying to enter the Ukraine. She and the rest of the group were then scheduled to produce clay figurines for their remaining stay in the Sanatoruim which will hopefully prepare them for reintegration in to society.

Stay alert! By Mrs. Smith

“Toilet. Main building, room 306.” Apparently, many of you have seen the signs which appeared on the trees during the first day of teambuilding and took the risk of visiting 306, the organisers’ room. Yet for your own safety, you would better think twice before you decide to answer the call of nature there again. At first sight, the room looks pretty innocent: piles of boxes, random plastic cups and plate with butter cubes. But serious danger lurks just behind the corner, or to be more specific, under the bed of the organiser, Nina ReIssue 1: page 12

shota (organiser, UA). “Everything disappears in this room”, says Hadrien Segond (organiser, DE) who witnessed the menacing phenomenon while taking a nap on the calm Saturday afternoon. “Apparently, we have a black hole right under the bed”, he added. There are several USB cords, sim cards and mobile phones missing. With deepest sorrow we wish to an-

nounce that the Norwegian delegation got sucked into the hole as well. Funnily enough, the missing

objects reappeared later on in unexpected locations as did the Norwegians.

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Eleven Sober Heads By Cleopatra and Caesar

It was a cold, foggy morning, when eleven delegates from the committee on Environment first came together with one and only goal: Solve once and for all the problem of drug abuse in Europe. Eleven sober heads, anxious and unsure of what may follow, yet thrilled by the suspense and the mystery of the unknown. And it does not take long for them to find their way under the guidance of the lovely Maggie Hunter (chair, IE). They soon found trust in each other, as they take a

dive of trust into the drunken sion, by making funny jokes bottle. After about how the a walk around French considthe forest, er the Swiss to they found speak slow. themselves all And on Suntogether disday, they built cussing about fences of sticks prejudices while one can and ‘leftovers’ clearly see of the Second the fences beWorld War tween them still present in been thorn the Europe of down one after today. They the other, leavwere always ing the space adding a bit open for true of flavour into their discus- emotions to be expressed.

Pretentious, moi? By Lois Lane & Superman

Keeping our busy hands to ourselves In the words of Wojtek Ke- jokes nor quotes blowski (chair, PL): “With me were spared. From t h e never ending adventures of Elina Feldmane (LV) to the cycling conquests of Ruben Corijn (NL), from the star-studded modelling trips of Vera Bachrach as a chair nothing is boring!” (BE) to the oriental travels of This statement is certainly Warren Luk (UK); ITRE’s legtrue as the antics of ITRE will acy is paved with gold. But prove. These 12 budding Eu- it doesn’t stop there. While ropeans lead by their crea- Alex Gikas (GR) states: “We tive chair set out every morn- are pretentious,” this may be ing with a clear, moral view a case where not everyone is to having serious fun. Neither how they seem… Printed on Konica Minolta

There is a certain Irish lassie by the name of Helen Hayes (IE) who has a strong affinity for horses and foxes, not always the best combination but she manages to bring the two together through social interaction. Maybe it is her skill with her hands that has lent so well, but then everyone in ITRE shares this handy skill as was demonstrated in the modelling class. Hopefully this committee will be as ‘hands-on’ with all their further, slightly more serious activities. Issue 1: page 13


The Pobeda Gang By Lois Lane & Superman

Warning: international gangs in Pobeda On October 14th and 15th in (BE), Susanna Takamaa (FI), Pobeda, Ukraine, a young Giuliana Grondowska (SE) and Andrea Sbrana (IT) dragged their blindfolded fellows Maksim Kroukovski (RU), Elodie Tavares de Almeida (PT), Florian Schneider (DE), Michalis Koulloros (GR), Wander Rutgers (NL) and Anna Perrott (UK) into the bushes, only to emerge 20 minutes later having changed position. On Sunday, comrade Erik Auklend (NO) joined in, Wander (NL) goes for a dander! and their mystical activ-

ities culminated in the creation of straw voodoo dolls (code name “ Ukrainian Straw Angels”), the use of which is still to be determined. During their 2 days of excitement, the gang also managed to produce their fair share of quotes, the most memorable being Giuliana’s: “You have to go under me here…” while being entwined in a mass of hands and other body parts. Beware of this gang – they have the power!

group of Europeans led by Yulia Babenko (chair, UA) were seen acting strangely on the grounds of the local sanatorium. The gang, calling themselves “Culture and Education”, spent a considerable amount of time performing various rituals while chanting untranslatable verses such as “boom-chica-boom” and “ooh-aa-aa-aa-ooh”. Later on, Marie Boltenstern (AT), Jack Lidholm (IE), Jeroen Boone

What you say all day long: “Uh, it’s actually nice if you stick them in the radiator.” - Ance Kaleja (chair, LV) “I lost my leg in a tragic Irish dancing competition!” -Paul Lavin (IE) “Are you all right? Have you peed?” -Sille Jansen (chair, NL) “Pull off your pants!”-Anna Feeney (IE) “To be an European is more a state of mind” Emilie Waguet-Wiart (FR) “Ohh, you broke me!” Michaela Hadravová (CZ) Issue 1: page 14

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Welcome to DEVE School of Rock! By Romeo and Juliett

The biggest band ever meets in EYP – autographs and pictures available! Saturday m o r n ing was the day, Pobeda MTV Studios the place, and DEVE the band was the glowing star of the evergreen world of music. Their manager and hot ex-drummer Ance Kaleja (chair, LV) welcomed Juliett and Romeo to the recording room. Pelle Baas (NL) was sitting behind his drums, as Soteris Varnava (CY) and Daniel Duarte (PT) were standing there as the cool and sexy icons of the band. All kinds of music could be heard: Veronika Fafienski’s (DE) salsa style, Allan Rydman’s (SE) metal sound and Anna Feeney’s (IE) soft violin-play-

They soon decided to go out for some games, while their single was being recorded. They had some problems with the Magic Stick (musicians don’t deal with those things – they are just famous). Things got hot during Spider Web, when Anna Feeney (IE) asked Pelle Baas (NL) to pull of his pants. On Sunday, during the working flow… Leena Allik (EE) shop and the CD-equalizing, said she had been to loads of instead of playing instrucountries before getting into ments, all got their hands the band, as well as Cristina into Ukrainian clay aiming to Bernacchi (IT), whose beauty create little mascots of their could have led her to a mod- own. They were called for an advertisement and time ran elling career! out. Tune up 666.6 FM to listen to their single “Get Jamai Down” – upcoming news from MTV really soon!

Thee Box Uncovered By Romeo

Thee Box has been officially presented and there is already some juicy and fresh stuff in it! Glowing in bright orange, a half-paper note from the Norwegians has been today’s Box meal. The note says: • The Amsterdam girls are charming • Sebbe (also known as Sebastian) from Sweden, took fifteen pieces of Norwegian salmon. Printed on Konica Minolta

• Juliana from Sweden has been seen sneaking off with the Latvian butter • The Greek delegation enjoyed eating Norwegian milk chocolate more than their own cheese • Martin busted the secret fabulous four Thee Box is hungry! Thee Box wants your stories! Thee Box wants your KISs! Issue 1: page 15


Eurovillage By Jane of the Jungle & Homer

On a chilly Saturday evening, the delegates of the KIS gatheredin a crowded Ukrainian canteen to satisfy every gastronomic craving known to mankind. Delegations from all over Europe and beyond presented their national cuisine, drinks and sweets to all the other participants…and even some locals. There were French cheeses, Belgian chocolates and Irish beer to fill up everyone’s stomachs. However, every other country present offered some interesting, tasty and sometimes frightful foods. The Dutch pancakes, Greek olives and chocolate cake (Sacher Torte) and “Mozart Chocolate Balls” from Austria put smiles on our faces. However, the Romanian pickled vegetables, Bulgarian Airan and Latvian weed butter made us frown; but I blame our uncultured taste

wegian salmon and the Belarusian sugar-covered cranberries. Some of the foods appealed to certain people but not to others, such as the HOT Serbian paprika, the Swedish pickled herring and the Bulgarian goat’s cheese. However, there were very few complaints and many compliments about the popular Swiss cheese fondue. We have decided to proclaim this the best item of the Eurovi l la ge ; Congratula tions!

As we were all keen on trying the food, many of us made the usual mistake of eating all sorts of food in no particular order, despite the President’s warning. Many people wolfed down handfuls of food from one table to the next and, to put it mildly, soon palette for this! We were very felt a little bit ill. Yet, as one impressed by the Cypriot delegate put it, “I’ve never walnuts and wine, the Nor- seen so many cultures come Issue 1: page 16

together in my whole life. It’s really beautiful.” So overall, the night was a raging success. However, once our stomachs settled and the music began

to boom, we started to work off all that food by dancing the night away. Some lucky pairs even went further than dancing... Given the theme of the session, we fully promote such behaviour. Along the way, the press team picked up a few tricks to survive the ritual of Eurovillage; bring a bag and put some sweeties into it in order to eat them working in the pressroom a day or two later. Bon appetite!

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Catch your rights! By Romeo

Talking about Human Rights is never easy. You suddenly find yourself wondering what you really know about them. What if I dare to ask what is the most important Human Right to you? Which one would you say? Trying to avoid the clichés, I decided to reduce the entire Europe to 20 people, randomly selected people between Barcelona’s and Munich’s airports, who I could ask about their most important human right. I expected nothing but a sincere and direct answer.

air hostesses, a security officer, two tired Ukrainian ladies, a comic-loving Spanish youngster, amongst others; HALF of them would stand up for freedom, three of them would say that the right to live rules over the other ones, two of them would say that the freedom of speech is a comIn this “little Europe” of my pulsory right in nowadays own, from a happy and world , two of them would be wealthy German family, over defending the equality bea Chinese businessman, two tween gender and race, one

of them would be fighting for the right to live in a decent and proper way, one of them would prefer medical assistance, and the last person would NEVER even heard about Human Rights. Going back to Europe, we find a wide range of opinions regarding the Human Rights. Is there a right or wrong answer? And if not, are they all equally important?

Wash Hands, Wash Hands! By Jane of the Jungle and Mr.Smith

Many of you may have no- basins before every meal or ticed how important it is to coffee break you take here. take a trip to the wash-hand Without considering ourselves to be filthy animals, we were quite surprised by this common practice. Being investigative journalists, we decided to go to the root of this phenomenon and discover its cause. As we did not know whether or not this is standard in all dining venues, we went to a restaurant in the rumbling centre town of the local village. And Printed on Konica Minolta

there again, we were asked kindly but firmly to conform and wash our hands. Despite being filled with hungry Ukrainians, everyone in the restaurant took the time to rub their hands with soap and water before eating. Even though it is not compulsory to take part in this routine, in order to avoid small but feisty Ukrainians chasing you, we recommend that you “Wash hands!”

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The Campus

By Marge and Daredevil with assistance from Olga Stepanchuk

If you are wondering where you have been staying and why there were so many kids jumping around, read this article. We have in fact, been living in a sanatorium called “Pobeda”, which literally means Victory in Russian. According to our sources, it was built after the Second World War by the Укрфозздравниця-organisation which specialises in healthcare services. This campus was meant for various purposes. However, following the 1986 tragic events of Chernobyl, it has mainly served as a habitat for people suffering from the consequences. Unfortunately, this includes some of the children you see

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walking around campus. Nevertheless, this area seems spared by the long- term effects of the tragedy, and is thus cherished by many as an escape to nature. The “Podeba” is the cornerstone of the small village, as a lovely Ukrainian lady called Lila who works in a nearby school could confirm; “I work for the organisation, so they give us tickets to come here. My two sons and I use the play-

ground quite often.” According to Raya, the receptionist of the site, the capacity of the site can reach up to 430 people. Visitors stay here for an average of 24 days and engage in activities such as sports, puppet shows, or walks around the campus. The site is financed by the government, yet anybody can come here simply for vacation at his or her own expenses. When questioned on whether or not our presence disturbs them, they replied with an awkward grin: “We have gotten used to it!”

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Thee Box By Superman and Tarzan

This is the true story of thee box. Now picture this, my dears; a long time ago (1987), in a land far, far away (Fontainebleu). Shadowing figures gathered by the murky waters of a lake, with mist billowing over the rolling hills. In the distance a howling can be heard, not of the wind, but a werewolf! In these dark times there were few symbols which acted as a beacon of light for truth, honesty and hope. But there

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was one thing which lit the path for all of those to follow: Thee Box. Thee box is the living soul of the session in Kiev. It is the unique opportunity to reveal your innermost emotions and feelings, or maybe just to gossip. Thee box will only reach its destiny if it is filled with the most dramatic, emotional and heartbreaking intrigues.

Therefore thee box is dependent on the engagement and initiative from YOU, the lovely delegates: Please don’t deny your feelings by keeping them bottled up. Feelings are there to be shared, so make “Thee Box” complete! Either way, Thee Box is hungy. Come to the pressroom and feed it!

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The Heat is on!

Finally October 15th Session supporters:


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