Issue 3
covering:
Editorial By M&M
You made it! You made it! As we are writing, your resolutions are being typed. That means, tonight we are not the only ones on the campus erasing, adding and re-erasing commas to the constant ticking of the final countdown. The printing machine below is now cooperating as if it has been reborn, yet we are anxious to get to know how it reacts to new impulses from the chairs. Absolute perfection, as put on the front page, was a sheet we stole, completely ruining their neat, german system of organising resolution typing. “Absolute perfection” is also our motto. This newspaper always aimed at uncovering true stories, providing quality information first – preferably about you. Therefore a team of journalists was running around and after you to find you in the moments you least expect us, hoping we would find you at times you don’t want to be traced. The one or other love story that happened over the last weekend was uncovered. For the reason of fairness, we decided to lift the curtain draped over the night’s activities of the press room a little bit too. Here is the picture story showing what really happened in Cottage 2-2. M&M
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Ukraine, a country on a crossroad By Tarzan
Ukraine regained its independence after the fall of the Soviet Union in 1991. The nation was reborn after centuries of foreign domination and control, and has since tried to find its place in Europe. With over 40 million inhabitants, Ukraine is the largest country in Europe and holds a strategic position between the East and West, making it an important factor in European politics. Today, the country struggles with defining in which direction it should develop; west towards the EU, or towards Russia in the east. Historically and culturally, Ukraine has strong links to both sides. The Ukrainian language is closely related to Czech, Slovak, Polish and Belarus whilst the Russian language is also widely spoken. Orthodox Christianity is the predominant religion, but Catholicism also has many followers, especially in the west of the country. Also the identity of the Ukrainians is finely balanced between west and east. Whilst many see Russia as Ukraine’s natural friend and ally, others believe Europe represents new opportunities and hopes for prosperity. In Ukraine, there are two dominant political parties which struggle for political power. One is Nasha Ukrayina (Our Ukraine), which headed the coalition behind the Orange Revolution. Led by Victor Yushchenko, it hungers for a Ukraine in Europe. On Printed on Konica Minolta
the other side of the political spectrum, the Party of Regions led by Viktor Yanukovych wants Ukraine to move closer towards Russia. After the Orange revolution in December 2004, Victor Yushchenko won the Presidential election together with Our
not be either/or, but rather choosing to work more closely with each others. That might be an option which allows Ukrainians to embrace all aspects of their past and future in order to build a stable, prosperous region where the EU, Russia and Ukraine
Ukraine. The Party of Regions regained parliamentary strength after the presidential elections which gave them a small majority in the Parliament. These two different parties in power created a standstill in Ukrainian foreign policy which underlined the disagreement within the population. This could be an opportunity for Ukraine; Confronted by the impossible decision at a crossroad between East and West, the best route might
are able to work together in a spirit of friendship and mutual understanding.
Sources: The Economist 13/07/06:“Another Orange coalition collapses in Ukraine” and “Living with a strong Russia” The Economist 29/07/06: “Hopes and experiences” Issue 3: page
Teachers at School By The Teachers
We, the teachers, carried our students to the international session of the European Youth Parliament on our backs through sheer hard work (or was it the other way around?) and thought we would have a nice vacation in Kyiv. You might imagine our surprise and chagrin when we were told we actually had to work as well – and be at school. A workshop had been arranged in a local school about the way the Second World War is presented in different history books – and the teachers were supposed to bring a history book from their respective countries. Some had done their homework and others had forgotten it at home (does it sound familiar?). The workshop was quite interesting but the time definitely limited so when the time for the presentation of the groups’ efforts was up, most groups had not discussed all the questions and practically all had discussed different ones. It was perfectly clear that it is not an easy task to conduct lessons with teachers (if anyone had thought so from the beginning). After all, we are used to conducting classes, not sitting in them. Still, it was interesting to see the way the history books differed and how different aspects were stressed in different countries. The most fascinating, however, was the Ukrainian history teacher Svetlana who held a short but passionate lecture on the way history writing has changed after the fall of the Soviet Union: a total rearrangement of what was considered historical facts. From the wealth of source material discovered in Soviet archives, this history teacher had arranged a museum containing several thousand original documents concerning the fates of ordinary Ukrainian citizens during the Second World War. The workshop was followed by tours in different schools and the day ended in host families, where we enjoyed true Ukrainian hospitality. And of course the dinner included mandatory hand washing. They are very hygienic, these Ukrainians.
Civil Liberties By Superman
Say what you think… we’ll ban you for it! Out there, in here and everywhere: the committee on Civil Liberties has covered them all: racial hatred, intimidation and social status and all since leaving teambuilding on Sunday. While most of the discussions have been held with a steady pace, there was some diversification; “the general point you said… oh what did you
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say?” With this par firmly established, this team of civilised beauties proceeded to build on yesterday’s work. The state of national political parties and the differences between the views held by each country opened up the personal barriers. Rosalie Stone (NL) testified, “The parties do have the right to say what they think”. Personal experience of French hospitality was offered by Diane Foures (FR); “we were one of the nicest countries with immigrants.” Jonas Geeraerts’ (BE) inner
child was allowed out to play this morning, after a rather heavy night of ‘social interaction’ at last night’s Kiss party; “true education from your childhood.” All this wonderful unity isn’t easy though; “we have so much history, culture...”, “blah blah blah!” interjected Anna Maria Melachrinos (GR). Hopefully they’ll get all the holes filled in before General Assembly. Printed on Konica Minolta
You say it best when you say nothing at all By Mrs. Smith
What generates a successful discussion during committee work? DROI II puts good communication as its priority. However, it is not just “ordinary” communication. To make the exchange of opinions and ideas efficient, the delegates devised a special system of communication. Interestingly enough, the idea behind it is to stay silent when one has a point to make. Curious how this works? DROI II introduced a gesture language, which allows them to see where the discussion is heading at; “You look disagreeable, Paul”, observed Sara Liev Canebrake (NO). By raising your index finger you indicate that you
oppose the debated idea, while a waving movement of both hands lets everyone know you support the views of others. The delegates, who have a question form the peace sign with their fingers. In case someone appears to be drifting off the subject, others may draw the attention to that fact by shaping the letter T with their palms. This uncomplicated
system facilitated the flow of the discussion and as well kept their hands busy and to themselves. At least for some time.
Kiev by night By Juliett
What could relax you better than a walk through after the exhausting hours of hard work? On Tuesday night, many partisipants had the chance to see a lot of interesting and impressive parts of the city: architectural monuments, native inhabitants and us, the tourists! As it is an old capital, Kiev amazes with great cathedrals and old buildings, alternating with the technology of the 21st century. Despite the presence of the religious dimension represented by churches, all the streets were ready for night-
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ly discoveries in the cold. preparing for the football Regarding people, we could match of the week: Dinamo admire the winter outfit for Kiev vs. Olympique Lyonnais. May the loudest win!
the upcoming ice age from our respective countries. Furthermore, the Subway offered a unique show as it passed through the tunnels: both young and old couples enjoying the darkness. Getting off, all the pubs were
Challenged by the journo team to preform the Zulu dance, the natives could observe groups of crazy people dancing on the central squares and trying to involve passers-by into their innocent game. After some intensive days, the participants finally found a calming “land of freedom” under the shining moon light.
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Ready? Set... Go! by
Cleopatra & Caesar
Tuesday, October 17th 2006 IIn the setting of a living room, the Committee on Environment began a series of long lasting and dreadful discussions. The question of drug abuse is one that has been troubling experts, social investigators and legislators around the world. Despite numerous efforts to deal with the problem, nothing seems to work as it gets worse day by day. “We have to be realistic”, Evita Asimaki (GR) pointed out, and the ENVI members therefore promised not to let their minds be stacked on old ineffective ideas, but rather to work hard and produce innovative solutions by tackling the problem at its source. So just to get their minds
working properly, they started of with a brainstorming game: 100 ways to use a banana. You can buy it, you can peel it, you can fall in love with it and after messing around with it you can even liberate
ing the legalisation of drugs. Their opinions differed but that did not get in the way of producing fruitful discussions. On the front of the two opposing sides were two prominent ENVI members: Anton Lundmark (NO) and Alex Kolev (BG), both with great expertise on the subject. David Janelas (CH) was given the task of directing the flow of the discussion, in order to make sure everyone it! These are just some of the participated. Finally, the two many creative suggestions fronts reached the comprothis team came up with. mising point in Anna Szul’s (PL) statement ‘The most imThen they got down to busi- portant thing is to prevent, ness; the issue of the day be- not to cure’.
Wake Up! By Jane of the Jungle
Now you too may learn the tricks that the CJOs use to stay awake during an EYP session. 1 st 2 nd 3 rd 4 th 5 th 6 th
Utilise the breaks by drinking lots of at GA and committee work. coffee. 7 th Be aware that there are people watch Open the windows and turn on the ing you, and some of them have camfans; the fresh air will keep you alert. eras. 8 th Take cold showers everyday. Eat lots of sugary foods regularly. Participate in committee work: If you 9 th Have parties and sing songs at night are interested, you will stay awake! time. th 10 Don’t sleep! Play energiser games. Never stay still for too long; especially
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The traffic lights are turning red! By Daredevil and Electra
The immense feeling of passion and cooperation empowered the tiny room Nothing but “congratulations!” could better describe the way the team started committee work. They were brilliant in every way. The first brainstorming session had been electric with John Joy
“
lena Bratonozic something (SR) was so exe ve r y b o d y Kaksteist kuud” cited that she should try. accidentally Pleasing a kicked her lovely journalist’s everjourno! Meanwhile, Marcos curious mind, the dinner was Tavares Pinho’ s (PT) large
Love indicator for Human Rights III: IQ Estimated Average: - Age - Height Survival rate Group unity percentage Friendship probability In total, the kiss probability
Seems good 18.3years 1.74m 3% 98% 92% 95%
(IE) furiously taking down the fingers rested on his lap eagroup’s notes. Elisabeth Häg- ger to play the piano again. After lunch, Vlada Soucup (CZ) and Niklas Herpertz (DE) surrendered to their exhaustion and headed for their beds, even if it was only for five minutes. Our committee dinner was exquisite. The cold gquist (SE) and Big Melanie journey brought us to a cosy (CH) sat on the bed, tracking restaurant-library, where Juthe progress. lia (UA) made sure we had Later on our expert arrived to food on the table. Neverthefind a group with countless less, eating the chicken wings questions for him. In fact, Je- for “desert” after your steak is
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served with revelations Apparently Karlis Lapsis (Chair, SE) is not into long-term relationships. [as well a reason to come to EYP – Ed.] Furthermore, Katarina Allev (EE) gave the beautiful Estonian translation of “12 months”. By the end, Ariane Lebot (FR) had increased her ‘knowledge’ in another 10 languages. On the wait for the bus, we used “What did you Say?!” in order to warm up. What a night! Lack of sleep...
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A dish of DROI I … By Elektra and Daredevil
Chair Finnian Hanrahan (IE) fed his delegates with more than just food for thought. On the second day of committee work during an energizing “Honey tell me that you love me” an unfortunate delegate was also fed paper. First Course: Brainstorming day 1 of committee work; Obviously one step ahead of Finn; who was sitting in a
2 of committee work; Cecilie Torjusen (NO) professed this committee’s tolerance for other skin colours; “Vanessa (Jud, CH) my little chocolate… tell me that you love me”. Vera got her ears pierced by a trans“…This is ladies night and the feelings right. Oh yes, it’s ladies sexual, which also proves this crowds’ lack of night, oh what a night...” With so many girls to choose from DROI I discriminates no one, prejudice. Not even deaf Ivan Genov (BG) is still playing but Aoife Hollywood (IE) made people are discriminated hard to get! sure that Enid Blyton was on against here; Ana Saver the committee’s most wanted list for her negative portrayal of dos Santos (PT) waves her Dessert: Committee Dinner Gypsies. Enid watch out! DROI I hands in agreement, which day 2; is out to get you! happened to be a deaf ap- After a big helping of committee work, the gypsies of corner scratching his chin, plause. DROI I were more than ready this committee had to hit the town. Dinalready started sortner was one big outing their work when burst of laughter, it was suggested to with starters arriving do so by their chair. after the actual main Vera Petrovic (SR) meal, but Sandra knows how to light Mylordou (CY) was up a serious session all smiles. Jeanne of brainstorming; by Lanzt (FR) shared an retelling a politically Food and more food: “I’m stealunusual dream inincorrect joke about gypsy ing some chips. You can pay me volving a shopping mall and back later!” (Amy Dobson, UK) procreation. “This wine has gypsy-aroma” a fish tank. This was not the Aife Hollywood (IE). only thing revealed during Main Course: Discussion day the course of the evening…
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IT REads nicely By Lois Lane & Superman
Discovering the connection between Czech cars and Polish babushkas The committee on stimulating conversation and witty repertoire asks the question on: How to combine business and pleasure; is there a correlation between Czech cars and Polish babushkas? The Committee on ITRE, A. Recognising the need for regular toilet and coffee breaks, B. Accepting Eemeli Leppaaho’s (FI) plan; “If we get the gasses from somewhere else…” to be unbeatable, C. Understanding Wojtek Keblowkski’s (chair, PL) clumsiness to be of vital importance in keeping the committee sane, D. Applauding Helen Hayes’ (IE) “Is your grandma still alive?” enquiry to be the most random of the day, E. Concurring with Warren Luk’s (UK) gas release issue to Western Europe from the East;
1. Strongly recommends water and biscuit reserves to be renewed on a regular basis; 2. Acknowledges that Eemeli’s plan, as Frantisek Juzl (CZ) explains, means “more and more cars in the Czech Republic, Latvia and so on”; 3. Demands the use of anti-static pole devices providing greater stability in the workplace; 4. Actively reassures the public of our grandmother’s existence; 5. Urges to impose charges on the traffic of congested areas as the only effective method of gas control.
Girls, these boys are still waiting for visits to their crib in room 406.
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Let’s talk business By Lois Lane
No bar, no work! A typical businessman’s day begins at work, because nothing before the Starbucks’ coffee takeaway can
be deemed worth mentioning. The day then continues and usually concludes with after-work drinks in a local bar with colleagues. Different biological pressures then summon him or her to (different) beds. The Committee on Culture spent their first day of work in a very similar way. They were assigned a conference
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room, worked hard until the afternoon but then thought that a change of atmosphere to somewhere more quiet and relaxed was necessary to continue their fruitful discussions. On their way to the bedroom they decided to drop by the bar and see if it was free to continue their debates in more sociable surroundings. Unfortunately upon arrival the air was filled with cigarette smoke. The committee quickly reached a consensus to return to the bar at another time. Their needs then lead them to room 209 where
they spent another two hours talking and analysing the points. After a good night’s sleep the committee met once again in the early hours of the morning and concluded the previous night’s bar visit merited a return. Thus there they spent the second day of work and transformed the bar into a dynamic workplace for budding leaders of Europe and the world.
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The Offices By Homer
Take a look into the places where all the magic happens. The ‘committee work’ room is essential in the forming of a good resolution. One of your dear journalists decided to take a glimpse into the places where all the ideas are expressed, gathered and processed. Walking around the hotel you can see groups of people gathered in the lobbies on different floors. These are LIBE, AFET II and CONTRO (Controversial Affairs affectionately named by the Committee on Constitutional Affairs). The things that instantly catch your eye are the colourful plants and beautiful paintings to set the mood. According to Gaute Bugge Drangsholt (NO) it is “a great way to meet new people as so many are passing by”. On the sixth floor bares a warm atmosphere and end-
less stacks of paper are there to greet you. This is the working area of ITRE, AFET I and INTRA. As was pointed out by
EMPL and DROI II are another story. These committees are buried somewhere deep within the hotel, locked behind closed doors. EMPL was actually forced to change location after Anton Batchvarov’s (BG) bed was broken. The conditions with which it was broken can only loosely be described as committee work. ECON and ENVI have broken from the pack. the good thing about my committee room They setis that i can hide behind the curtains. It’s like tled in the i’m there, but i’m not there, just like a ghost. chairs’and I think that’s pretty clever” journos’ - Danny Vannucchi (chair, IT) accommodation. the delegates, it is extremely This situation is more than comfortable because of the adequate for Emily Waguertsoft carpet. Wiart (FR) for she may have Human II have quite probably the chance to see Vincent nathe best room of the session ked. – right next to the bar.
“
Thee Box Uncovered part two By M
• • • • •
Florian Schneider (DE) just quit smoking tonight and asks everybody to beat him up if they see him with a cigarette. Franz made out with Lycliblica in a dark corner tonight… Sitoris (Cyprus) has wild fantasies about his ambassador. Michalis (CY) and Peni (GR) got along pretty well! They are both really “warm” lately. Just see the way they look at each other. The member of the Ukraine Parliament, Mr. Vitaliy Shybko, is undoubtedly the most beautiful Ukrainian man you would ever see! He lives in my dreams! I couldn’t work on the committee work because I’ve always been thinking about him!
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Ukraine gets warmer and warmer By Romeo
Explore a cool Ukraine with this week’s hot news in Kyiv! This week means something special for Kyiv. Not only because an EYP International Session is taking place, but also because of the increasing amount of ladies are walking down the streets, not in the same way as in Amsterdam though. Miss Europe 2006 Contest is to be held at Palats Ukrania on October 27th with currently unidentified famous VIPs sitting on the jury. Ukraine’s representative Alena Avramenko, a lovely 18
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year-old girl thinks she is the most beautiful too. Defying the freezing weather, all kind of foreigners are wandering around Kyiv; either on holidays or to have the chance to meet one of the “Misses” [see also the pick-up lines in this issue - Ed.] Thanks to their appearance here, October is not going to be that cold with such an event!
teur cinema scene. It started about 30 years ago when “Kyiv and Odesa” film studios launched a festival for young directors. Nowadays it brings more than 240 Ukrainian films to the big screen. For all those of you who stay longer, it is held in Kyiv from the 21st to the 29th of this not-sofreezing month.
Kyiv is definitely becoming The lesser known Molo- cooler and cooler now that dist Festival is the home to EYP is rocking this city. Ukraine’s long running ama-
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Employment, employment; if only we had more of you By Marge
a n d m o re suitable job, so t h e y agreed to temporarily drop out of school. Naughty, naughty. However, as all of them agreed, the ever-changing job market requests flexibility. Eager minds get hungry sometimes, so Who would want to do Tu e s d a y that? night they took Everyone, if they had Tereza off for CommitFiserova’s (CZ) strict mum. tee Dinner. UnThe other 11 EMPLers prob- fortunately the ably could not find a better reservation at Posted: Tuesday 17th of October 2006 Job requirement: Looking for young, dynamic, creative enthusiasts who feel that they can make a difference. Workplace: Room 411. Stuffy little chamber with four beds. 13 chairs. An empty fridge. Employment description: Try solving the EU’s unemployment problems, issue restructuring proposals for the labor market. Write a resolution. Manager: Chris Tripp (chair, DE)
the restaurant got cancelled due to unexpected delay. An after dinner Kyiv suburb odysee froze Katie Teahan’s (IR) toes, Stephane Renevier’s (CH) nose, Nastiya’s Moskaliuk (UA) nerves, but also produced an inspiring “Employment Medley”from Totzi Batchvarov (BG) and Chris (chair, DE). After a lot of confusion and a walk that ended where it started, the committee was rescued by Natalya D ovhopol (organiser, UA). A walk to remember.
Opinion: Gossip is a fearsome thing! By Marge
Gossip, in whatever form it is written, is one of the most entertaining written diversions. Anything - from very bad to slightly embarrassing to downright stupid - that has happened to somebody else, has the potential to cheer us up and make us feel good about ourselves. Isn`t that a weird effect? In
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my opinion, gossip is intellectually unappealing, but nevertheless it fascinates each and everyone of us in some way. Gossiping has this wonderful power of bonding, with the slightly bitter aftertaste of sometimes hurting other peoples feelings. Person A meets person B and start talking about something re-
lated to person C that they both happen to know. They have a great time. Who actually said or did what and when does not really matter, neither do the reasons and hardly ever the place. That is why gossip is such a good addition to an EYP session. Drama, emotions and bonding, Whoo-hoo!
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“Do you want to check out my stamp collection?” by
Elektra & Cleopatra
“It’s only words - and words are all I have - to take your heart away…” If you believe pick-up lines can’t get any worse than “Hey, I think I have seen you before. Where? It must have been in my dreams” and “Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?”, EYPers will prove you wrong. “KIS & tell” asked EYPers to tell us their worst pick-up lines: “Apparently we both have nothing interesting to tell each other so body language is the best way of communication” - Hadrien Segond (Organiser, DE) “You are far bellow my standards but hey, it’s getting late, so lets go and get physical” Ance Kaleja (Chair, LV). Timing is everything. And when you thought we reached the all-time low, Paul Lavin (IE) takes us further: “You don’t sweat much for a fat bird”. Eyes are typical targets for all flirts: “Your dad must be a thief. He stole all the stars and put them in your eyes” (Karolina) “If you were a playground I’d be 6 years old” - Cecile Torjusen (NO)
For the improbable case that these lines do not work, Jack Lind Holm (IE) has found a way to maintain his dignity: “Would you like to dance?” Then, after a cold rejection, reply “oh, you misunderstood me…you look fat in those pants” Oh no...
And here is a classic one Sonja Weicker (Organiser, DE) uses: “I forgot my phone number, can I have yours?” “Oh what a lovely dog! ... Can I stroke you?” - Filip Ondra (journo, CZ)
Vice-president Chris Tripp (DE) seems to be fairly good at this discipline and has a couple of them: “Take me, you won’t regret it, well, at least not until tomorrow” or “Some do; some don’t; I might…” The British sure know how to fall flat when it comes to pick-up lines. Arian Hassup (UK) tries his luck with “You look like my next girlfriend’, whilst Anna Perrott’s (UK) favourite is “How do you like your eggs in the morning, fertilised or unfertilised?” “Do you have a library card, because I wanna check you out” - Amy Dobson (UK) There’s no further explanation needed for this one: “Mmmm… yes I like…how much?” - Michel Hochstrasser (Editor, CH)
A Ukrainian organiser misinterpreted the phrase “hitting on someone” and revealed the brutal truth of the life of an organiser: “Yes, Shamal tried to hit me last night. I have loads of bruises!” Issue 3: page 14
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Challenge this! By Elektra and Superman
The defenceless delegates were subjected to the atrocious crimes of the calculating journos last night during the committee dinners’ evening. The young and innocent were unaware of the evil powers that be, plotting for
actions were inhibited by lo- of the local inhabitants with cal law enforcement. Special their interpretation of the regards go to the ITRE and Zulu Dance.
NAMED AND SHAMED are AFET1 ECON ENVI HRIII our amusement. A series of CULT committees, which challenges were issued to made the metro rock more you to perform at your peril. than usual. The LIBE committee made a big impression on the hearts
for not performing. This will have consequences of course. Be aware!
Some did we award you. For those who dared to tempt the wrath of Journovia a greater threat now lies in store for you! Commendation goes to the delegates of the Committee on Human Rights I, whose Printed on Konica Minolta
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Session supporters: