At Ease

I came to Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA) in 1998 in Washington, D.C. At nine months of abstinence, I took my first trip to Boston with my sponsor. Because our local fellowship was still growing, it was suggested that we make a trip to Boston where recovery was solid. I was petrified to hang out with people I didn't know.

I slept on a pad on the living room floor in a fellow's home with others in the room. That weekend there were three events in the area, and we were to go to all of them. A fellow was getting married so we met at a restaurant for lunch. On the way there I asked if the restaurant had fruit, because I had just gotten a second fruit. I stated fearfully, "No fruit? Please take me back. I'll eat at the house. I don't want to let my fruit go." Everyone was so kind and said I would be okay. Upon arrival, my sponsor took off across the room and I didn't know where to go or who to sit with. I spotted the person whose home I was staying in and sat down at her table. Within minutes, a beautiful lady sat down next to me and started talking about something (probably to do with her recovery). I listened. Her voice was so soothing, and her words matched her ambience. It was the best drug I ever had!

Soon I was calm and felt like everything was fine. And it was. It was such a spiritual experience. She felt like an angel to me. That night, an FA fellow was having a party with a DJ at her house. I had so much fun dancing and meeting new people. Fellows who have been in FA a while are stellar at making new people in recovery feel at ease. It's magic.

The next morning, we went to a barnstorming party in New Hampshire. The house was going to be torn down and rebuilt using the same wood and materials that were used to build it originally. I drove with a fellow I didn't know, and we got to know a lot about each other in the hour that it took to get there. AT that point, I was so comfortable; I knew some people from the earlier parts of the weekend and was at ease approaching others I didn't know.

By Sunday afternoon and two more events, I was in love with this program. Everyone I met was nice and welcoming. FA has continued to demonstrate to me that I dont' have to live in fear, doubt, and insecurity anymore. There are so many people I can reach out to for fellowship. I can freely talk about any situation in my life and get the support I need.

I continued to go to Boston as often as I could to get some good, loving fellowship. I knew I never had to isolate or hide again. I wasn't alone anymore, and I belonged!