FA Stories of Recovery from Food Addiction
March 2022 $2.50
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March 2022
Columns Qualification: Family Matters . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1 First 90 Days: A Rocky Road. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .4 COVID: Pandemic Pressure. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 6 No Matter What: Abstinent in a Hurricane. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .15 Lighten Up: Food Addict Ears. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 17
Features Restaurant Reunion. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .9 Abstinent Healing. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 11 Wedded Bliss. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 13
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Qualification
Family Matters
I
woke up this morning with a heart filled with gratitude. My family has just completed the holiday of Passover, celebrating our heritage’s ancient redemption from slavery. I celebrated my own personal redemption this year as well. The program of Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA) has freed me from my slavery to food and an uncontrollable appetite. With the help of my Higher Power and this fellowship, I’m in a right-sized body today, and have released over 60 pounds (about 27 kilos). I currently have close to seven months of continuous abstinence, after a long journey both in and out of these rooms. Reflecting on previous Passover holidays, the differences are striking. I used to wake up the morning after our Seder (a traditional, festive meal) too stuffed and bloated to move after overeating the whole night long. I would isolate over the holiday because I was too ashamed to be seen by neighbors and friends. My weight fluctuated and I had no self-confidence due to my secret eating and bingeing. I also had trouble finding nice clothes that fit because I had outgrown everything in my closet. connection
This Passover, I woke up with plenty of energy and had the patience and serenity to give of myself to my husband and children. The combination of abstinence, plus recovery and Twelve-Step work, has really helped me to work on myself and become a more patient, calm, and serene woman. I was able to host my parents in my home and be present for them as well. My mother commented that she sensed that the vibes in my home were more positive and loving than ever before. She noticed that my children seemed happier and there was much less arguing and fighting between them. She’s not the only one to witness a change. My husband frequently expresses his appreciation for the new and improved version of me. We have been married for 20 years, and he has witnessed the many ups and downs of this disease. He is my biggest cheerleader and a huge supporter of this program. My four children, ages 21, 16, 13, and 9, have come to accept and support my recovery as well. Having seen me both in and out of the food during their childhood, they prefer the abstinent version of their mom. While actively in my disease, I 1
would often sneak food from the kitchen and hide out in the bathroom with the door locked so that I could gorge myself in peace. My kids used to knock on the door and ask if I was eating again. Of course, I lied and said “No!” They always knew when I had been bingeing though, because it caused me to be extremely lethargic and often physically ill. I simply was not able to be present for them in the way that is possible now. It got to the point where my 9year-old daughter used to check my purse to see if I had been hiding any goodies in there, and she would be terribly upset if she found food wrappers. There was a lack of trust between us that somehow went beyond the food. Consumption of sugar, flour, and quantities affected my moods. I lost my cool a lot with my children, venting my frustrations onto them. I had an especially volatile relationship with my 16-year-old daughter. We just could not see eye-to-eye on anything. One of the miracles of recovery is that we are particularly close now, and not a day goes by that we do not share a hearty belly laugh together. She even said to me the other day, “Mommy, I can’t believe how much you have changed this past year.” As a teenager, I restricted my food and was very thin throughout high school. In my 20s, I began bingeing with alarming frequency, starting gradually with weekend in2
dulgences and then progressing to daily and nightly bouts of bingeing. I haven’t had peace with food since about age 13, until I got abstinent. My addiction to food took me to embarrassing lows. I have eaten food that did not belong to me, food from the garbage, and food that was frozen or burnt. I have missed important social functions due to food hangovers. I had to leave two different jobs due to my active food addiction. Besides weight gain, another result of my out-of-control eating was that I suffered from depression, anxiety, and mood swings. Amazingly, those issues have almost completely cleared up with abstinence from flour, sugar, and quantities. I came into a different Twelve-Step program for food in 2006 at the age of 25. Unfamiliar with the concept of food addiction or compulsive overeating, it was a huge relief to realize that I was not alone in my struggles with food, and that I was not a crazy or terrible person but was simply ill with the disease of addiction. I was relieved to learn that there was a solution to my problem if I was willing to do the work involved. I attained a year of abstinence in that program and learned a lot about recovery, in addition to losing excess weight. However, I eventually relapsed and experimented with various versions of that program, plus many other diets and nutritionists, for the next decade. There March 2022
were many short periods of abstinence, but I would always end up going back to the food. A friend introduced me to FA in 2016, and although initially abstinent for seven months, I began to struggle in these rooms as well. I think one of the reasons that I had trouble staying abstinent was my lack of complete and total acceptance of my condition. I was therefore unwilling at times to take the necessary actions to safeguard my abstinence. I would also struggle to stay away from the food during especially stressful periods in my life or in uncomfortable social situations. Recently, my teenage daughter was diagnosed with anorexia nervosa, and it was then that I was forced to acknowledge the impact that my untreated disease of food addiction and recurring relapses were having on my family members. I got abstinent in late October 2020, after a conversation with our new family therapist that shook me to the core and broke through some of the denial that I had been unwittingly holding onto. My daughter had openly shared my food and emotional history with the therapist and described how angry and sad it all made her feel. The therapist was very honest with me during our subsequent individual session. She explained that unless I managed to get my food in order, it would be exceedingly difficult, if not impossible, connection
for my daughter to get healthy again. She needed me to be a strong role model and example of recovery. Now both my daughter and I are walking the road of recovery together. She is in treatment with a local eating disorders program and is, thankfully, making progress. I pray for her all the time and turn her care and recovery over to my Higher Power. I know that, ultimately, I am powerless over her recovery, but that God has the power to heal her. I do not know how I would be able to cope with the stress of an illness of this magnitude in my family without the spiritual principles of this program and the incredible support of my fellows. Our relationship has strengthened immeasurably over these past seven months, as it is based on integrity and unconditional love. I credit FA for not only saving my life, but for helping to save my daughter’s life as well. I am now 40 years old, and looking back, I can see that God was with me every step of the way. He never gave up on me, helping me to attain abstinence again after many painful relapses. Thank you, FA, for offering me hope during my darkest days, and allowing me to once again experience the miracles of recovery. When I’m willing to put my food on the scale three times a day and work the program in its entirety, then I’m truly free. Anonymous 3
First 90 Days
A Rocky Road
W
hen I first arrived in Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA) in 2005, I weighed 211 pounds (about 105 kilos) at 5-feet, 5-inches tall. I immediately embraced the program and lost 88 pounds (about 40 kilos) in the first year. Early on, I broke my abstinence when I went home to Australia after travelling from Boston, and then I struggled for five years, treating FA like a diet. I continued to struggle and go through a lot of sponsors, until I decided to leave the program in 2010. I didn't gain weight for over a year, but then suddenly, I started putting on weight and couldn't stop eating. I became convinced that I really was a food addict and powerless over food. I came back to FA in 2012, determined to surrender to the program. I didn't eat sugar and flour, but my program still wasn't working. I gained weight, struggled to keep sponsors, and I wasn't weighing and measuring my food accurately or eating what I had committed. I moved to the beach, did a lot of art, lost all the weight again, and decided to have an art exhibition. After the exhibition, I 4
ate sugar and flour and drank caffeine again. It shocked me. It seemed to come out of nowhere. I cried when I told my sponsor about the circumstances. She had a suggestion about an issue I was having with an old friend. She said I should set some boundaries in this relationship, which made me realize I was still hanging on to codependence, caffeine, and food. I struggled with food for two more months, putting on 22 pounds (about 10 kilos), and my sponsor dropped me. I got a new sponsor who was at all my meetings, and I started an AWOL (A Way of Life, a study of the Twelve Steps). She suggested that I attend 90 FA meetings in 90 days, which is possible here in Sydney, and it helped a lot. I realized I needed to let go absolutely. I felt like I wouldn't be able to get abstinent again, that I was too far gone. In desperation, I started doing every single tool every single day. I weighed and measured my food exactly and ate what I committed. I went to business meetings, listened to FA CDs, and read connection magazines. I made sure I arrived at meetings ten minutes March 2022
SUSAN F., NY
early. I've been in Twelve-Step programs for 20 years and I have had 90 days many times, but this was the first opportunity I had to go through the Twelve Steps with all my addictions down. I've waited so long to be able to do this. I just wanted to follow all the FA suggestions. I reached my 90 days of abstinence in the FA program. Today connection
my weight is 132 pounds (about 60 kilos). I don't know where this program is going to take me, but I know that if I maintain this lifestyle of discipline and obedience, I have faith that I will be able to stay abstinent and recover from this disease. I am so lucky and grateful to be in FA. Cynthia P. G., Australia 5
COVID
Pandemic Pressure
A
fter 16 years of recovery in Food a little chaotic. Addicts in Recovery Anonymous Because our department is well versed in (FA), it’s tempting for me to think technologies that support remote learning, that I am “fixed,” but I’ve discovered that I am my team was called in to provide emergency not. training sessions. We were also asked to serve I work at a public, four-year university in as backup for the technology help desk staff, online learning. My primary responsibilities who were flooded with inquiries, all while involve collaborating getting our regular with professors and workload completed It’s never acceptable for me to faculty to design and in time for the start of structure online the new term. It was behave unprofessionally, no learning materials. stressful, to say the Building trust and matter the circumstances. least. rapport and mainFortunately, the taining a positive structure and tools of working partnership are vital to the creation the FA program served as a solid foundation of a well-structured online course that serves for my new day-to-day routine, and I was the students. managing fairly well. I was feeling a little When the governor issued stay-at-home overwhelmed from time to time, but I was and physical-distancing orders, due to the holding it together overall. Or so I thought. COVID-19 pandemic, I was fortunate to The weekend before spring term was suphave a job that could be done remotely. The posed to start, some old behavior that had initial shutdown occurred in the middle of been dormant for a long time cropped up. finals week, so hundreds of professors were To meet the deadline, I had to work an extra frantically trying to deliver and monitor four hours and I wasn’t happy about it. I exexams. When on-campus faculty also real- changed emails and phone calls with the ized that they would be required to teach course instructor, and his cavalier attitude their spring-term classes remotely, things got about my weekend overtime efforts hit me 6
March 2022
the wrong way. Before I could stop myself, my righteous anger took hold, and I communicated in an unprofessional and inappropriate way. Though I finished the class so it could open, I knew in my heart that my behavior had been out of line. This type of angry reaction was a long-forgotten night-
ally, no matter the circumstances. At first, I wanted to bristle, but I knew she was right. And I was feeling a way that I thought was gone since coming to FA. I was having an emotional “hangover,” feeling shame, regret, and anger at myself. How could I have behaved so rudely?
MEREDITH M., PA
As I processed this incident over the next mare from the past, and I felt sick. On Monday, I spoke at length with my several days with fellows, my sponsor, and my manager about what had happened. She un- manager, I gradually was able to shift from derstood and acknowledged why I’d gotten deep shame, blame, and regret to acceptance upset, but the bottom line was that it’s never of my responsibility and humanity. I had asacceptable for me to behave unprofession- sumed I was fine, despite the extra workload connection
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Twelve Steps and stress of the COVID-19 disruption. I thought I was above succumbing to old character defects. I forgot to stop in that moment of upset, take a deep breath, and ask for help from my Higher Power. I tried to muscle through it on my own. And in that momentary abandonment of my FA tools and connection to my Higher Power, I got a full dose of my destructive behavior and all its consequences. This was a big lesson in humility and recognition that I am not “fixed” and never will be, no matter how long I am in FA. I forgot that I’m “in recovery” but not “recovered.” I am grateful for the blessings of this program, knowing that I don’t have to act out of anger and resentment. However, I do have to be responsible for using my Higher Power and other tools to navigate through those challenging moments. My failure to recognize that I was vulnerable to negative behaviors was my undoing. Since that incident and the insights gained from it, I’ve been more vigilant about selfcare, setting boundaries, and doubling down on my tools. Living in the constant uncertainty, upheaval, and information overload of this pandemic is not easy, but I’m grateful for my fellows, my sponsor, and our FA tools to help me get through it abstinently, not just with my food but also my actions. Susan F., Oregon, US 8
1. We admitted we were powerless over food – that our lives had become unmanageable. 2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. 3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him. 4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. 5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs. 6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character. 7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings. 8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all. 9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others. 10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it. 11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out. 12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to food addicts and to practice these principles in all our affairs. 2022 Adapted with permission from AlcoholicsMarch Anonymous
Restaurant Reunion
A
s a person who is prone to addiction, it’s easy for me to pour myself into different activities. That’s been the temptation with my graduate-school practicum, which has been joyful, frustrating, anxiety-producing, thrilling, fulfilling, and almost all-encompassing. When I started school, having been abstinent for a fair amount of time and getting the self-awareness that inevitably accompanies such a blessed state, I mentioned to my sponsor my proclivity for over-involvement. She lovingly and calmly shared her faith in a Higher Power and the Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA) program and reassured me that if I kept doing all my tools and talking about whatever I noticed, my recovery would be okay. Thank God this has been the case. I believe that my Higher Power steps in graciously when I flounder in a sea of distraction and misguided ambition. For example, I was busy seeing a significant number of clients, which at times meant working more than 50 hours a week for my practicum. Thank God I was still attending all my committed FA meetings and doing all my other tools. However, I was stretched pretty thin and had to work hard not to view anything that proposed to take up additional time as a personal affront. During a phone connection
call from my brother, whom I have seen approximately three times in the last 20 years, I was presented with a dilemma. He was going to be in town with his family briefly while vacationing and wondered if I would like to meet up with them so that we could see each other in person and catch up. Recovery had thankfully been influencing my perspective for years, so I said the right thing, “That sounds great.” I then qualified by explaining that I had a demanding work schedule and asked if he could give me advanced notice prior to his arrival. (FA has also taught me that it can be beneficial to share my thought processes and to ask for what I need while being flexible.) I had a sense of foreboding, which I worked through on my FA calls, because my brother was not contacting me about his travel plans so that I could request time off in advance. One of my most robust coping strategies is to turn to the Twelve Steps, which give me permission to admit that I am powerless and then encourage me to let go and trust that my Higher Power will step in and provide a good solution for all. As the time of his arrival neared and I still had not heard anything from him, I prepared myself to accept the possibility that I would miss his visit. FA had introduced me to the 9
power of gratitude. So I reminded myself that before FA recovery, I had been estranged from my brother and that FA has given me the ability to take steps that have resulted in a stronger relationship than we have ever had before. As I went about my day, a sudden shift in plans occurred. Someone once said that God is an eleventh-hour God, and that was certainly true in this case. Almost simultaneously, my brother contacted me and my work schedule opened up. I was awed. My brother asked if I could meet him and his family at a local restaurant for dinner. It felt like a red carpet had been rolled out in front of me. What could I do but agree? Our pre-COVID-19 reunion took place in a restaurant. I was not thrilled about the idea of meeting at a restaurant, because I was concerned that the sights and smells would be uncomfortable for me. However, I knew that I was spiritually fit and that my purpose was pure. I had already eaten my dinner, and I told myself that we would probably just talk for an hour and then disperse. My prediction was wrong. I arrived at the restaurant, they ordered, and we stayed until almost midnight, talking and laughing and catching up. I was amazed at the neutrality that I had. I had no interest in the items that they or other people were eating. I was entranced by the beautiful opportunity to talk with my brother, his charming wife, and their teenage son, with whom I would love to have a closer relation10
ship. My brother is generally rather reserved and yet, in this instance, he was positively loquacious. I am so glad that FA has taught me that it is more important to “be interested, not interesting.” Listening and validating were skills that I barely understood and generally thought were signs of weakness prior to FA. My brother’s eyes shone as he talked about his garden, his church, and his car, among other things. I was so glad that I could give my brother the gift of being genuinely interested in him. Prior to FA, I had virtually no checks on my frequent and extremely debilitating self-centeredness. Today, because of my FA tools, my needs feel met, and as a result, it is much easier to give myself to others. We left the restaurant and I walked them out to the car. Standing in the dark parking lot watching their vehicle pull away as they continued on their journey was difficult. Even though the tears welled up in my eyes as I thought of my brother and how we used to spend so much time together as children, I was grateful for the nostalgia and sadness mixed with joy, contentment, thankfulness, amusement, and wonderment for God. I turned away, grateful that I didn’t have to go back into the restaurant to numb my feelings. I have a good life today and am thankful that God speaks to me through my FA tools so that I can show up for all of the magical, special moments that my Higher Power designs. Susan D., California, US March 2022
Abstinent Healing
T
he accident happened when I was 30 years old and weighed 265 pounds (about 120 kilos). I needed multiple surgeries on my ankle and foot. The doctors almost had to amputate my foot, but were able to save it. I was in a wheelchair for six months and on crutches for another six months. It was so incredibly difficult for someone who weighed as much as I did. I sat in a chair all day long, eating. What else was there to do? For 30 years I walked crookedly and was in constant pain. The pain has been especially bad for the past three years. The strange rotation of my ankle messed up my hip and it needed to be replaced. Last June, I had my left knee replaced because years of yo-yo dieting had destroyed that knee. Four and half weeks ago, I finally had my right ankle fused. This year has been quite a journey. Three major orthopedic surgeries in one year, and I am still abstinent. Thank you, God! So here I am again. But this time I weigh 140 pounds (about 64 kilos) and I listen to the doctor and follow his instructions. I am sitting in a chair with my leg elevated, allowing my ankle bones the time they need to fuse correctly and solidly. Four and half weeks down and four and a half more to go. Instead of eating, I've found lots of other things to do. I read, connection
play games on my tablet, and watch TV. I make lots of phone calls and do service wherever I can. I work hard to stay grateful. I know how quickly I can slip into self-pity. Self-pity will lead me directly to the food. A few weeks ago, I felt the self-pity surrounding me like an ugly, heavy, gooey, yellow-brown ooze. I was quickly spinning into myself. Thank God I saw it and knew that gratitude was the answer. I made the decision to be grateful that I had a medical issue that could be helped. I looked around my home and realized how many people in this world don't have a home. I have indoor plumbing, hot water, and I live in a safe neighborhood. I saw the luxury I live in. I have air conditioning, a phone, a cell phone, a computer, and a microwave. I became grateful. So what was it like having surgery as a food addict? There were a few things I had to do that non-food addicts might not have to think about. For instance, I had to tell my doctor about my dietary needs. My doctor told me to tell the nurse at my pre-admission testing about the food I needed. When I met with the nurse, I gave her a copy of my food plan and a sample menu for the day. When I went in for surgery, I had a cooler packed with lunch and dinner, since I knew I would not be able to order my food for that day and wasn't sure they would provide what 11
I needed. I am grateful I did this because by the time I got out of recovery and into a room, the kitchen was closed. The first surgery went well. The doctor ordered a gluten-free (I am also gluten intolerant) and sugar-free menu for me. I was able to order what I needed. Portion sizes of the veggies were small, but I stayed abstinent. My second surgery was in the same hospital. The doctor ordered the same menu. I brought my food for the first day and ordered off the menu for the second day, but this time I had problems. My breakfast came and it was missing an item. They said I had too many carbs. I told them I was not on a controlled carb diet. I had to call the doctor and have him redo the order. Somehow, they had me on reduced calories and carbs. Then my lunch came. Everything was covered in a gelatinous glop of something. I returned it, then had to return it a second time. It took several days for me to get a “clean” meal. I asked my daughter to bring me food for a few days. Finally, the kitchen started following what I asked for and I started getting what I needed. I stayed abstinent. The third time, I was in a different hospital. I came prepared, but there were no issues. It was lovely. Again, I stayed abstinent. What about pain? As an addict, I am concerned about using narcotics for pain. The doctor and anesthesiologist highly recommended I take the pain medication they prescribed. I talked with them about my 12
concerns. They told me they would help me get off of them as quickly as possible. They gave me a TENS machine that uses tiny electrical pulses on the painful area to help alleviate the pain. I was off the narcotics in a few short weeks for each surgery. For this last surgery, I used them for only one week. The narcotics had side effects and the doctor prescribed medicine, which I took faithfully. At one point, the home health-care nurse told me I had an impacted bowel—an emergency situation. She said that if it got any worse, I would require a surgical solution. She made a recommendation of a liquid to drink. I immediately got my phone out. How could I do that on this program? Before I had a chance to dial, by God's grace, I received a call from someone who had been in Program many years and had been in the same situation. She told me to listen to the nurse. I called my sponsor and reviewed it all with her. It was all good! The situation was resolved. Today, I'm sitting here writing about my experience to share that it is possible to stay abstinent. Only four and a half more weeks to go and I hope to be in a walking boot. And if the X-rays show I need a little more time, then I need a little more time. I'll say the serenity prayer to remind me to accept the things I cannot change. Eventually, I will be able to walk around the block without pain—something I have not been able to do for years. I am grateful. Norma Jean P., Ohio, US March 2022
Wedded Bliss
T
he first thing I said to my mother when I joined Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA) in 2010 at the age of 22 was, “But what about the dessert on my wedding day?” She gently asked me if I was getting married that day. I was not. She suggested I cross that bridge when I get to it. Well, I just got to it and the amazing thing is we didn’t have the traditional dessert at our wedding! I got married on September 23, 2017 in Boston, where I live. I fit perfectly into the dress I bought six months earlier, because I was abstinent and in a healthy-sized body, thanks to FA. When we were planning our wedding, one of the first things I said to my now-husband was, “I don’t want the dessert or the slicing ceremony.” Fortunately, he was on the same page. Our wedding was about us, our family and friends, and our commitment to each connection
other, not about the food. In my disease of food addiction, I could only focus on the food aspects of my wedding, no matter how far in the future it was. In my recovery, I got to spend my time and energy planning everything else for the big day. I made my invitations by hand, painted signs for decorations, and made the DJ’s playlist. I had so much fun planning that eating food barely crossed my mind. I started my wedding day with an abstinent breakfast, 30 minutes of quiet time in my apartment, some yoga, and extra time to reSUSAN D., CA flect before joining the wedding party. I had my lunch packed and ready to bring to the hair salon. I sat there with my closest friends and family, laughing and talking about the big day without worrying about what to eat, what not to eat, or wondering if my dress would fit. 13
During the reception, I filled my plate with abstinent food, sat down with my husband, and took a deep breath. I wasn’t even hungry. I was so filled up with joy, love, and happiness that the idea of eating barely crossed my mind. Gratefully, being in recovery, I knew that I still needed to sit down and eat my meal, regardless of how I felt in the moment. So that’s what I did. I took bite after bite of the right amount of abstinent food. When I was done, I got up and danced the night away. It was my favorite day so far in my life. I was standing under the chuppah (wedding canopy), staring at the person I love the most in this world, sharing our love and commitment to each other in front of our families and friends, wearing a size 4 wedding dress, and not thinking about food, my body, my weight or anything outside of what was happening in that moment. It was perfect. I thank my higher power and this program for giving me the opportunity to be abstinent, healthy and fully present. Today, I am grateful to still be abstinent, calm, and sane when it comes to my food, my weight, and my life. When I look back on my wedding day, I am filled with so much joy that my smile is from ear to ear. I look at photographs and watch the videos and remember how special that day was. How beautiful that day was. How calm that day was. And how abstinent I was. Thank you, God. Jamie S., Massachusetts, US 14
Twelve Traditions 1. Our common welfare should come first; personal recovery depends on FA unity. 2. For our group purpose there is but one ultimate authority – a loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience. Our leaders are but trusted servants; they do not govern. 3. The only requirement for FA membership is a desire to stop eating addictively. 4. Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or FA as a whole. 5. Each group has but one primary purpose – to carry its message to the food addict who still suffers. 6. An FA group ought never endorse, finance or lend the FA name to any related facility or outside enterprise, lest problems of money, property and prestige divert us from our primary purpose. 7. Every FA group ought to be fully self-supporting, declining outside contributions. 8. Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous should remain forever nonprofessional, but our service centers may employ special workers. 9. FA, as such, ought never be organized; but we may create service boards or committees directly responsible to those they serve. 10. Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous has no opinion on outside issues, hence the FA name ought never be drawn into public controversy. 11. Our public relations policy is based on attraction rather than promotion; we need always maintain personal anonymity at the level of press, radio and films. 12. Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our Traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities. Adapted with permission from Alcoholics Anonymous March 2022
No Matter What
Abstinent in a Hurricane
I
live in South Texas, considered as the frontier in Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA), a little over 100 miles from San Antonio. I began FA six months ago at 212 pounds (about 96 kilos), my highest weight having been 275 pounds (about 125 kilos). At 73 years old, connection
ROBIN M., NY
I had been on the diet roller coaster for over 50 years, but am now 132 pounds (about 60 kilos) and wear a size 4. No wonder I guard my abstinence so closely. Recently, I became aware that there was a hurricane brewing in the Gulf and was likely heading our way. I live with my son 15
and his family in a lovely rural and his- miles per hour. We had no water for toric area, and our family discussed what flushing and no power, but a cool front we should do: leave or stay. Because our came with the storm, and by the next day property is in a low-lying area, we de- we could open windows. I was able to get cided we would go into town in case ice from a nearby town and my food there was flooding. We made our plans, stayed preserved. I ate cold meals for and I began cooking and preparing my three days, but I ate abstinently. We had food, all the time talking to my sponsor plenty of bottled drinking water. On about “what ifs.” Sunday evening we Two days later, I got power and by No matter what is going on, then had gotten the was ready to head to our planned locatool needed to get I must plan, prepare, tion in town. I the doors on the repacked my food in frigerator. I transand carry out plastic bags and ferred my food into made sure it was the refrigerator and my plan each day. very cold before I was able to use a miput it in ice chests. I crowave to heat it had two foam coolers available to me, up. We were not able to return home but no ice. When I arrived at the house, until a week later. the refrigerator was only a small dorm- Our community had a lot of damage to room type. There was a larger refrigera- property, but no loss of life. There was a tor there, but the doors were not on it lot of inconvenience and stress, but we and we didn’t have the tool we needed to and our property are fine. attach the doors. Landfall was expected For me, abstinence is a way of life, and around 10-12 p.m., and at midnight we no matter what is going on, I must plan, lost power. There was no air moving in prepare, and carry out my plan each day. the house and I lay there thinking, I can’t As I write this, another storm is forming breathe. I don’t think I can do this. I started in the Atlantic; Irma, they are calling her. meditating and realized that God could I pray that she will not bring further dedo for me what I could not do for myself. struction to the area, but God willing, I I got through the night. will stay abstinent. We had lots of high winds up to 120 Conny M., Texas, US 16
March 2022
Lighten Up!
Food Addict Ears
W
hen going to qualify at a meeting I'd never attended, I got confused when entering the facility. I asked the person at the desk where the dining room was located. She responded that the dining room was closed at that time. Seeing my dismay, she suggested that I may have been told the meeting was in the “Diamond" room, which it was! Leave it to a food addict to hear “dining” instead of “Diamond!” Shirley M., California, US connection
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God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.