A HOOK UP INTROSPECTION LOVE Poff JONES Culture
EVA SIMMONS POFF CULTURE
GAY AMSTERDAM Trending
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06 Guys Night Out 14 Bar Guide 19 Betch 24 Le Patio 26 Love Jones 28 Trending
32 Guy Bytes 34 Guy Dining 36 Poff Culture 40 Adam&Ease 50 Guy Travel 54 Guy Fitness
Bobby Blair Publisher Cliff Dunn Editor Jason Otero Creative Director Editorial Contributors Bob Kecskemety, Duncan St. Thibault, Tom Bonanti, Brad “Scoop” Casey, Andy Kress, Adam Strong, Robert Elias Deaton, Dale Madison, DJ Maximus 3000, Kyle Poffenbarger Production Dennis Dean Editorial Photographer Paul Lescault Photographer Angel Torres Production Assistant Administrative Chris Hamel, Silas Thebert Sales & Marketing Keith Chamlee Sales Manager keithchamlee@guymag.net - 954-465-1563 Brad Casey Client Services Executive bradcasey@guymag.net - 954-554-4912 Keith Norris Client Services Executive keithnorris@guymag.net - 404-550-8030 Dale Madison Client Services Executive dalemadison1@aol.com - 954-478-2415 National Sales Rivendell Media National Ad Representatives 212-242-6863 Display Ads Placement Ad Deadline: Thursday, Noon Camera Ready Artwork Deadline: Friday, Noon Display Advertising sales@guymag.net - 954-903-4771 Classifieds Ads Text Ad Deadline: Thursday, 5 p.m. Placement Ad Deadline: Thursday, 5 p.m. Camera Ready Artwork Deadline: Friday, Noon Main Office 2157 Wilton Drive, Wilton Manors, FL 33305 Phone 954-903-4771 Fax 954-607-5712, editor@guymag.net,
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Opinions expressed by advertisers, columnists, feature writers or other contributors are not necessarily the opinions of Multimedia Platforms, LLC or its staff. All advertisements, pictures, text and illustrations are published with the understanding that the advertisers are fully authorized and have secured proper written consent for use thereof. Multimedia Platforms, LLC shall not be held responsible for any errors, loss or expense or liabilities on advertisements accepted after the weekly deadline. Publication of the name, photograph of any person, or advertisement contained in this issue is not to be construed as any indication of the sexual orientation of such person, advertiser, or organization. Partial or complete reproduction of any advertisement, news article, feature, or photograph from Multimedia Platforms is strictly prohibited. Multimedia Platforms, LLC is a registered trademark. A $30 or 1.5% (whichever is greater) fee will be charged for all NSF checks. © 2012, Multimedia Platforms LLC. All rights reserved.
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guys night OUT
BOOM
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guys night OUT
Taps & Tapas
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guys night OUT
Mona’s
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bar guide ALIBI 2266 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors oGayborhood tradition since 1997. Comfortable, inviting atmosphere with indoor video bars, outdoor drinking and dining. Drink specials all week, with mammoth 22-ounce Long Island Iced Teas for $3 on Thursdays. BILL’S FILLING STATION 2209 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors oVideos, pool tables, dart boards, dance floor, happy hour, live shows, Tuesday and Thursday karaoke – and great burgers to boot. Fun and friendly truck-stop-themed bar, great staff. BOARDWALK 1721 N Andrews Ave Fort Lauderdale oOver 100 of the sexiest men from all over the world. Go-go dancers, cages, billiards, 2-4-1 Happy Hours. Drag emcees and did we mention the boys? BOOM 2232 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors oThe bar with two names features a dance club and Gayborhood bar. Drag Bingo on Mondays, karaoke
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Fort Lauderdale / Wilton Manors
Mondays and Tuesdays, dance music Fridays and Saturdays, and (indoor) Sunday T-Dance. CORNER PUB 1915 N Andrews Ave Wilton Manors oFriendly atmosphere, unpretentious clientele and staff. Next to Island City Pizza (so you can get your drink AND your slice on). CUBBY HOLE 823 N Federal Hwy Fort Lauderdale oButch bar and grill with a rockin’ daytime crowd (and a fun nighttime one, too). Fifty-cent pool, 2-for-1 drinks all day every day, video games, hot movies on HDTV and DirecTV. Thursdays it’s Bare Bear Chest Night, and every Friday and Saturday, the fur flies with Hot Bears on Poles (where the Grizzlies Grind)! DEPOT CABANA BAR AND GRILL 2935 N Federal Hwy Fort Lauderdale oAdjacent to the America’s Best Inn and Suites. Pool open daily - No Cover or Day Pass. Great food, daily happy hour, Sunday afternoon T-Dance Poolside. Karaoke and live music. Open daily at 11:30 a.m.
DUDES 3270 NE 33rd St Fort Lauderdale oMen dancing for men. Hot go-go boys in an upscale atmosphere, piano lounge for more quiet interludes. Steamy shower shows. JOHNNY’S 1116 W Broward Blvd Fort Lauderdale oClub, bar, lounge. Male dancers and the men who love (to ogle) them. Sunday amateur strip contest (and karaoke!). LIPS 1421 E Oakland Park Blvd Oakland Park oThe Ultimate in Drag Dining. Dinner and shows six nights a week. Sunday Gospel Brunch with the Sisters of Sequins. THE MANOR 2345 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors oWeHo vibe (think: LA’s The Abbey) in the heart of the Gayborhood. Dine, drink, dance, play, mingle. Theme rooms (salsa and merengue every weekend in the Latin Quarter!). Live dancing and dining.
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bar guide MATTY’S ON THE DRIVE 2426 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors oDrink specials, billiards, and a chill gayborhood vibe. 75 cent drinks on Wednesdays. No Drama, No Smoking. MONKEY BUSINESS 2740 N Andrews Ave Fort Lauderdale oCozy neighborhood bar. Karaoke, drags shows, Patio Bar – and open at 9 a.m. daily. MONA’S 502 E Sunrise Blvd Fort Lauderdale oCocktail Lounge in the heart of Searstown. Fun customers, fun bar- tenders and fun proprietor (the Leg- endary Jerry). Outside patio. Wednesday karaoke, Thursday Speedball Tournament. NAKED GRAPE 2163 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors oRelaxing, friendly, hip, unique-the alternative gathering place on Wilton Dr. Now serving tapas nightly. Social Hour features & In The Biz all the time. RAMROD 1508 NE 4th Ave Fort Lauderdale oVoted World’s Favorite Leather Bar. Pig Dance first Saturday of the month – South Florida’s Busiest, Craziest Monthly Party (with caged
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Fort Lauderdale / Wilton Manors
hunks at midnight on Saturdays – Is there a downside to this?). ROSIE’S BAR & GRILL 2449 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors oNexus of the A-Gay List. Be Seen in the Scene (without making one). Food, folks, libations, and a killer Sunday Funday. SCANDALS SALOON 3073 NE 6th Ave Wilton Manors oA line-dancin’, tight blue jeans-wearin’ good time. Country and western music, two-steppin’, three-steppin’, pool tables, and themed events year ‘round. Cowboys and Indians was never this much fun, Pilgrim. SIDELINES 2031 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors oWhere sports come first. Nationally known destination sports bar with TVs streaming NFL, MLB, NBA and college games. Pool tables, dart boards and large indoor (and now smoke-free) fa- cility. Outdoor patio features area for smokers. Mixed crowd of gay men and women (who would have thought?). Featured in Bloomberg Businessweek and recommended by LOGO. SLAMMER 321 W Sunrise Blvd Fort Lauderdale
oPrivate Men’s Club. Pay cover, then uncover. Monday In the Biz, Thursday Leather Nights. They bring the party (and the mattresses), you bring the booze. SMARTY PANTS 2400 E Oakland Park Blvd Fort Lauderdale oCozy neighborhood bar with daily happy hour, and regular patrons. Show night Thursdays at 9 p.m. Karaoke Friday and Saturday nights, with matinee on Sunday afternoon. THE STABLE 205 E Oakland Park Blvd Fort Lauderdale oLevis-and-leather neighborhood bar, where the bears line dance and the cowboys are VERY friendly. TORPEDO 2829 W Broward Blvd Fort Lauderdale oDance, shoot pool, drink til 4 a.m., 7 nights a week. Doors open at midnight; dance til dawn. WILTON’S BIER GARDEN 2245 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors o German cuisine meets Der Gayborhood, in a fun, relaxed atmosphere. Upstairs dining, downstairs outdoor patio and bar, DJ music, and a fun staff make one of Wilton Manors’ newest venues a good time to be had by all.
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bar guide CLUB SUGAR 2301 SW 32nd Ave Miami oGay Latin scene, with Salsa, Merengue, Reggaeton, Hip Hop and House music always playing.
Miami / Miami Beach
Road, never a cover. Drink specials all week long, live DJs, high energy music and a fun crowd getting their dance on til late.
DISCOTEKKA 950 NE 2nd Ave Miami oHot music, hot scene, hot bartenders, and hot patrons in the hot heart of Downtown Miami.
PALACE BAR 1200 Ocean Drive Miami Beach oThis bar and restaurant in the heart of South Beach’s Art Deco District. Mouthwatering burgers, boys (and girls!). Weekend cabaret shows Thursday through Sunday.
JOHNNY’S MIAMI 63 NE 14th Street Downtown Miami oThe second location of the infamous Club, bar, lounge. Male dancers and the men who love (to ogle) them. Multiple weekly events including Latin Thursdays and Drag Queen Mondays and no cover.
SCORE 727 Lincoln Rd Miami Beach oDance, drink, party all night on Miami Beach’s Lincoln Road. Tons of events throughout the year, including fundraisers for Winter Party, White Party, and Miami Beach Gay Pride.
MOVA LOUNGE 1625 Michigan Ave Miami Beach oOn Miami Beach’s famed Lincoln
SPACE 34 NE 11th St Miami oMingle and mix with gays and str8s in
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the heart of Downtown Miami. Indoor dance floors and outdoor rooftop bar, spectacular light show. SWINGING RICHARDS 17450 Biscayne Blvd N Miami oThe only gay strip club in Southern Florida to offer FULLY NUDE dancers. Smokin’ hot dancers all week long. TWIST 1057 Washington Ave Miami Beach oGreat music, friendly staff, hot tourists and locals. Never a cover, always a groove. Bungalow Bar = Hot Men. In SoBe’s Art Deco District. VLADA LOUNGE 3215 NE 2nd Ave Miami oUrban, sophisticated and chic in Midtown Miami with a bar that ices over. New York pedigree meets Miami attitude. Nightly DJs, never a cover.
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guys night OUT
Le Patio
Monkey Business
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guys night OUT
Rosie’s
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Le Patio: The Perfect Marriage of Tiny, Cute, and Continental By DALE MADISON
D
o the names Jean Doherty and Veronique Leroux sound familiar? These women own one of the hottest little restaurants in South Florida. Le Patio boasts just 282 square feet, making it one of the most intimate dining places around. It has certainly become one of my favorite eateries. On April 1, the duo celebrates three years as proprietors of “the tiniest, cutest restaurant” in town. Sitting at the bar--which serves beer and wine—a sign caught my eye: “This is not Burger King: you don’t get it your way.” I chuckled about it as Veronique (“Vero”) quickly pointed out “that is NOT our philosophy! We will do what we can to make your dining experience just that, an experience.” Friends took me to Le Patio last month for my birthday, and it was one of the best meals I have ever had. That was not the first time that I had been there, and I have always been intrigued by the tiny size of the place. When I finally caught up with these delightful women to get their back story, it turns out that it spans 24 years, and is fascinating. Doherty and Leroux met while both were working as sales reps for a company in Leon, Spain. Jean’s boss told her “you need to take the new rep out for training.” “At 4:00 p.m. we went to the local pub,” Doherty recalls. “Vero thought it was a test for her, but that was 4:00 p.m. and I think at 6:00 p.m. we were at U-Haul. Of course we all laugh about the fact that the girls always do that. We did rent a truck and moved in together. Been together ever since and neither of us can see us being apart,” she adds. Leroux picks up the story: “We bought a house
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together. Our daughter Kathleen was so important in the relationship. She has been so supportive.” She remembers their first restaurant. “It was a little Tex-Mex with a bar,” recalls Leroux. “It worked out well but it wasn’t what we wanted.” It was while they owned the bar and restaurant in Leon, “The West Saloon,” that the couple made their partnership permanent. “The Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence held our commitment ceremony,” says Doherty. “They waived a toilet bowl brush over us and pronounced us ‘wife and wife.’” Three years ago, Leroux and Doherty were scouting locations for their signature Wilton Manors café. “We wanted the space where the tattoo parlor is next to Matty’s,” says Doherty. “We called the owner and were told, ‘Sorry, I just leased it. BUT, I have another space around the corner.’ We met him and fell in love with the space. And we have been so happy that we have it. It’s become our home.” Doherty and Leroux attribute the success of Le Patio to its patrons. “One of the greatest testaments for our little restaurant is 98 percent of our clientele is gay, one percent is lesbian, and one percent is straight,” says Doherty. “We love our gay boys. They come in, have a wonderful time, they bring in their mothers, and all have a great time, and we love them,” she adds. The couple is grateful also for their friends in the community. “If it not been for our general contractor, Jeb Sherer, I don’t know where we would be. He was our saving angel,” notes a thankful Doherty. “You know only one-in-10 restaurants succeed. We are proud to still be here and are energized every day to be here,” she says.
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Love Jones
By JUSTIN JONES
P
ants first. No. Shoes first. Then belt. Then pants. Clothes off. My heart is too loud. Too fast. Shirt next. Kissing. Lots of kissing. Passionate. Intense. Lip biting, face grabbing. Things move too fast around us. Room spins. The television is on. I don’t care. I can’t hear it. I hear and feel only the heartbeats. It beats so hard it hurts. Fall on the bed. Toss and turn. Stomach in knots. The good kind. Sweat beads. Mixes. Stings our vision. Tastes salty. Wine spills from the nightstand. Red on carpet. So? Mouthwash is the taste. Cologne, the smell. Skin, all of the above. It isn’t passion. It’s ferocity. It’s going a million miles an hour in the same place. Standing still in the middle of a hurricane. It’s the whole world crammed into a single moment. Passion climaxes. The story enters resolution. Nighttime and alcohol approve this message. Morning comes and the wine is dried. CNN drones on. The clothes are as disheveled as they were--a floorfashion eruption. The heartbeat has softened. The smells are almost the same. Cologne, yes. Breath, eh. Question 1. Time? Find phone. Ignore those texts. Am I late for anything? Question 2. Regret? Absorb the room in the daytime. Absorb him. Evaluate my judgment. Is it what I remember it being? Do I remember anything at all? Question 3. Stay or go? Always go. If he is your knight, he will rescue you again. Leave politely. Graciously. He has a schedule, too. Question 4. The cliffhanger: But will I see him again? Factors to include: his enthusiasm, my enthusiasm. Consider cuddling, and Question 2. Question 5 (2 parts): What do I tell my friends? And how do I get home? Our questions answer the overarching introspective: did I hookup last night? We write entire romances in one night. One night might encompass: Courtship, Honeymoon, Trial,
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and Heartbreak. It also often includes the optional foreword: alcohol. But that it lasted only one night doesn’t mean it’s a hookup; it also doesn’t necessitate the title “one-night stand” and the baggage (or lack of baggage) that comes with the label. To the status quo, the term “hookup” packs a wallop. It references a dalliance with suggestions of poor judgment, and reflects grander ambitions. A hookup is meaningless. It’s selfish and stereotypical. And it’s fun. Acceptable to some and practiced by many. Contrary to popular belief, though, duration has no relation to the label. A “hookup” may last one night, or it may last many nights (“Friends with Benefits” or “House Account,” anyone?). Likewise, romance--true and impassioned--may last one night only, when the situation is unrequited. When he decides not to call you; when, to him, the episode was one-night only, it becomes a hookup for him. Not for you. For you, a romance has taken place. Complete with your own tragic ending. To your friends, then, you answer honestly: “No, I didn’t hookup.” Smile. Perhaps there is a sixth question we romantics should add. One that we ask ourselves before we decide--in our drunken stupor--that he is the one: Can this wait for another time, maybe after we get to know one another? A million dollars says the answer is no, but it never hurts to ask. I hookup. Rarely. Very rarely. Okay, I hardly have a sex life. By choice, I hope. It’s not my style to have meaningless sex. You can do that with yourself. To me, it’s more about the story. To make love instead of f—. To cuddle rather than feel indifference. To wish for more instead of an end. To close your eyes, cross your fingers, and hope that he feels the same.
Justin Jones is a Minneapolis-based writer. Facebook.com/JustinJonesWriter
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L
ove Automatic: “Organ Donor” I stumbled across this on YouTube while I was researching some different film techniques. The gory Claymation video for the track “Nightmare” hooked me with the organ drive and harmonic vocal takes. It was like “Halloween (The Movie)”-meetsDeadmau5 with a soulful lead vocal. The group’s spring 2011 EP, “Organ Donor” is a non-stop five tracker that features much the same styling as on “Nightmare,” serving as an extended version with slightly different flavors in each track, packaged up in a nice, tight little bundle. I have their EP set on ‘replay,’ and can’t wait to hear more of what this group has to offer.
A
ir : “Le Voyage Dans La Lune (Voyage to the Moon)” Following in the footsteps of Daft Punks’ “Electroma,” the two French electronic ambient producers who comprise Air have been commissioned to provide a modernist
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take on a soundtrack for the fully restored, digitally re-mastered 1902 science fiction film of the same name by early cinema auteur Georges Méliès.
Credited as the very first science fiction movie, the black-and-white silent film includes many iconic images that are still popular over a century later, including the familiar frame of a rocket ship landing in the moon’s “eye.” The Special Edition DVD/CD-combo includes a 30-minute extended version of the original film with Air’s soundtrack styling overlaid. It’s an experience that’s very similar to watching “The Wizard of Oz” with the volume off while listening to Pink Floyd’s “Dark Side of the Moon.” Air seems to have drawn from a number of influences, including psychedelic rock, 70’s funk, Mediterranean and even Asian influences. This is a choice combination of art piece and audio/ visual experience.
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GUY MAGAZINE, THE FLORIDA AGENDA, AND WILTON MANORS MAIN STREET INVITE OUR COMMUNITY BUSINESS LEADERS.
Inaugural Multimedia Platforms Monthly Lunch Mixer • Network with South Florida Business Leaders • Promote Your Business • Make New Friends
Wednesday, April 25 Noon to 1:30pm 2164 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors Main Street Headquarters
COMPLIMENTARY Lunch provided by Storks Cafe
Limited to the first 125 business owners and their staff members RSVP to dalemadison@guymag.net
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Guy Bytes
By DUNCAN ST. THIBAULT
iPad 2: iPad, Too
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he successor to the iPad 2 went on sale this month, but don’t bother asking your Apple Store rep to show you the “iPad 3:” said gadget doesn’t exist. The iPad is the 2012—and third-generation--model of the 2011 device known as the iPad 2, which in turn replaced the iPad (which also had no numeric designation).
I’m engaging in this self-congratulatory display of geek foreplay as a means of comforting those of you who are contemplating chucking your (new) old iPad 2 for a (new) new iPad. While the 2012 iPad is literally the state of the art in terms of its technical enhancements, and therefore at the top of most people’s “conspicuous consumption list,” it doesn’t bring all that much that’s new to the e-table. The most notable new feature of the iPad “Version Whatevs’” is its “Retina” display, with a sharpness that’s four times that of the iPad 2, making it the sharpest built into a mobile device. According to Apple, with 3.1 million pixels, it has 1 million pixels more than an HDTV set. This means that images should come across with spectacular sharpness and clarity. This the case for apps that have been redesigned for the new screen, likes iBooks, Maps, and Photos, as well as enhanced iPad apps like GarageBand and iMovie. The downside is that apps that have not been redesigned don’t experience this jump in quality. And while the (new) new iPad is the world’s first tablet that shows high definition movies in full 1080p, many streaming movies (like those on Netflix, for instance) don’t stream in hi-def to the iPad, at least not yet.
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In addition, storage will be an issue because of the higher resolution graphics. Higher resolution adds up to larger files and less storage space. Macworld.com ran performance tests which found that graphics in Retina-ready apps eat up between two and three times more non-expandable storage on the new iPad than pre-Retina apps. More bad news: apps are normally engineered in one, all-purpose version for all iPad models. The newly-written apps meant to accommodate the new iPad will glom the same amount of storage space on other versions of iPad, and on iPhones, too, since numerous apps are designed to run on both devices. What would Steve Jobs think? The bottom line here is that the new iPad doesn’t bring anything new to the table that hasn’t been seen before, either in Apple’s own iPhone or in tablets made by rival manufacturers. On the plus side, Apple has changed neither prices nor configurations for the 2012 iPad. The cost of the base model—with Wi-Fi capability and 16 gigabytes storage--remains $500. The top-shelf model still costs $830, and includes online connections via cell network and 64 gigs of storage, which also requires that you select the Verizon or AT&T model and pay a monthly no-contract-required fee.
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Guy Dining By RICHARD DAVID CHAMBERLAIN
Market 17
Hidden Oasis of Gastronomic Glee
W
hen Oscar Wilde said, “After a good dinner one can forgive anybody, even one’s own relatives,” he must have been channeling Market 17. This elegant eatery located in the Portside Yachting Center is the brainchild of siblings Kirsta and Aaron Grauberger, who in any other life would have been born in a vineyard, such is their expertise around bottles of wine. While this may help explain the extensive wine menu with a selection numbering in the hundreds, it hardly prepares the hungry patron for the assortment of items on a dinner menu that changes nightly. That’s right— nightly. Never one to rest on her laurels, executive chef Lauren DeShields recreates your assortment of unusual offerings as if playing pick-up-sticks. You just never know exactly how the palate will play. On a recent outing with diet guru and society hostess Nikki Haskell, we took the plunge without checking the evening’s menu—though it is available mid-afternoon online at http://www.market17.net/menus.htm. The concept at Market 17 is farm fresh food…so fresh in fact that what’s plattered tonight was alive and growing this morning. While it may be tempting to skip the appetizer section and save your appetite for the entrees, part of the fun at Market 17 is the adventure of eating new foods. Translation: antelope satay ($15), served on a bed of soba noodles with a peanut dipping sauce. “You had what for dinner last night, dear? Antelope?” The look on your friends’ faces is worth the risk alone. Far less trendy, but just as delicious: Market Vegetable Tempura ($12), featuring baby broccoli, snap peas, avocado and fennel with a spicy kimchi aioli. A winner, no matter how you clean the plate. (We used our index fingers when no one was looking.) Our server Brittany Peterson, otherwise known as the perkiest blonde since Gidget, recommended that I try the Grilled Florida Hereford Boneless Pork Chop ($23 in
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a petit portion; $36 for entrée size)—“you just can’t go wrong with Hereford pork, honestly.” Of course she was right. It was tender and pink and, when combined with my new favorite legume--smoked beluga lentils—may just win the taste prize of the night. Mrs. Haskill disagreed, casting her vote firmly in favor of her perfectly cooked and flakey Pan Seared Wild Florida Red Snapper ($23/$36). She pointed out that if the fish were any fresher, we would have had to scale it ourselves. It wasn’t on the plate that long, of course. Nikki is tiny, but she knows her way around a fish fork. It was served crusted in something created by God herself, and served with herb-roasted sunchokes. On our next visit, if it’s on the menu, I intend to try the Pan Seared Duck Breast And Duck Confit ($23/$39). This particular evening, while it was listed as an entrée, the ducks apparently were smarter than the hunters for none arrived in the kitchen despite it being on the shopping list. Happy Hour runs 5 to 7 p.m. nightly with halfpriced drinks and appetizers at the bar. That includes the housemade sausages, the Market Ceviche, the Florida Middleneck Clams and Pork Belly, the Cornmeal Crusted Pigtails (if you have to ask, you don’t want to know), and yes, Antelope Satay—on any given day. Dining in the Dark is another Market 17 fave. In this test of skill and taste buds, you consume your food in a blacked-out room with your fingers. There are nightvision goggles, but only for the servers. Clever Market 17. Tell them Guy Magazine sent you.
Market 17 1850 SE 17th St. Fort Lauderdale FL 33316 954-835-5507
LOSE FAT BUILD MUSCLE
GET THE BODY YOU WANT IN THE TIME YOU HAVE STRENGTH TRAINING PRIVATE YOGA NUTRITIONAL COUNSELING REHABILITATION THERAPY PRIVATE CHEF IN-HOME TRAINING
$50 HOUR SESSION
954-789-3930
MAJOR CREDIT CARDS ACCEPTED ANDYFITNESSTRAINER@GMAIL.COM guymag.net
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EVA
SIMONS Dutch recording artist EVA SIMONS just released her brand new single, “I DON’T LIKE YOU,” on March 26. The song is produced by DJ Zedd, and is a dirty Electro/House club-banger! Simons initially came to the public’s attention back in 2004, after winning the Dutch version of the reality TV show Popstars as part of the girl-group “Raffish.” The group disbanded in 2006, and Simons went on to pursue a solo career. Three years later, Eva’s song “SILLY BOY” leaked onto YouTube and was rumored to be by LADY GAGA and RIHANNA! The song quickly gained popularity and reached over 10 MILLION views, but later was announced as Simons’ own. She later released the song as her debut single and it reached the Top 20 in Brazil and the Netherlands, but didn’t do as well here in the US. Since then, she has been featured on Afrojack’s song, “TAKE OVER CONTROL,” Chris Brown’s “PASS OUT,” and LMFAO’s “BEST NIGHT.” Eva is getting ready to release her debut album, and has been in the studio recently with Afrojack, LMFAO, Sidney Samson, & Far East Movement: GET READY!
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KERLI Estonian singer / songwriter KERLI comes all the way from a small town in Northern Europe (population: 5,000). The man himself, LA Reid, signed her to Island Def Jam Music Group in 2006. Two years later, she released her debut album, “LOVE IS DEAD.” The LP reached Number Two on the BILLBOARD Heatseekers Chart, and Number 75 on the European Hot 100. In 2010, she appeared on the Alice in Wonderland soundtrack, “Almost Alice,” on the songs “Tea Party,” and “Strange,” with TOKYO HOTEL. For her upcoming album, Kerli says that she’s developing a “new music style called Bubble Goth.” A promotional single from her project, called “ARMY OF LOVE,” was released in April 2011. The song went on to hit Number One on BILLBOARD’s Hot Dance Club Songs, and was an instant Pop success. Now, getting closer to the launch of her new album, Kerli has released another solid cut, titled “ZERO GRAVITY.” The accompanying music video is quite the treat for the eyes, so make sure to check it out on YouTube: TRUST ME, you won’t want to miss this one.
ATM
AT THE MOMENT
TOP SELLING ALBUMS
1. ONE DIRECTION – UP ALL NIGHT 2. ADELE – 21 3. GUNS N’ ROSES – GREATEST HITS 4. BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN – WRECKING BALL 5. PASSION – PASSION: WHITE FLAG 6. WHITNEY HOUSTON – WHITNEY: GREATEST HITS 7. DRAKE – TAKE CARE 8. VARIOUS ARTISTS – NOW 41 9. GOTYE – MAKING MIRRORS 10. FUN. – SOME NIGHTS
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KYLE POFFENBARGER IS A SOUTH FLORIDA-BASED DANCE/POP ARTIST AND WRITER. KPOFF.COM
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Adam&Ease By ADAM STRONG
Holy Hosting, Batman!
How to Throw a HOT
SUPER HERO PARTY T
here are fewer images more appealing to the kid inside all of us—especially if there’s a gay kid inside you--than the sight of a tight-fitting, tights-wearing costumed-andcaped hero arriving to save the day--and did I mention the tightfitting, tights-based costumed?) This idea came to me while I was watching the movie “The Incredibles” with my own caped crusader, Mr. Wonderful, last weekend. There’s something hot, sexy, and fun about throwing a shindig that requires your friends to dress as costumed super heroes: Drag meets the Age of Pixar! Invitations should emphasize the super hero theme, and maybe include an underlying storyline, something like “The Justice League of Extraordinarily Gay Gentlemen requests your presence for a Hero Council to Bring Battle to the Dread Legion of Drab!” Make mention of costumes and super powers being mandatory accoutrements. Create the invitations in comic book form using a “comicky” font and lots of tacky super hero colors (and glitter, gurl!), and add cool touches like a red felt cape and a glitter Milky Way or cosmic pattern.
Costumes are what this is all about, so let your guests know that they should dress as their favorite “existing” or selfinvented hero or villain. In a “perfect” world, your guests will all dress with a general theme but we’re talking queens here, so— much like the Dynamically Gay Duo—be ready for anything. The Hall of Just-Us Girls: Streamers, balloons, and decorations should all reflect the action hero theme of the party. If you or any of your pals are arts-and-crafts-inclined, life-sized cardboard cutouts of “real” or invented heroes make great centerpieces for various parts of your hero hang-out. Games & Giveaways: Giving each of your guests a super hero-related toy or trinket will set the mood and can be as easy as pinning a super hero-themed lollypop onto their capes or handing out faux “X-Ray” specs. Super hero-themed games will get your fellow “Gayp’ed” Crusaders involved: try an old-school variation with Pin the Cape on the Villain, or put together a treasure hunt with different items on a list that relates to the secret lair of a villain, or his World-Atomizing Doomsday Bomb. If you have the space, set up activity stations for your friends to put together “action” missions: projects like decorating Continued on Page 42
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Diner by Day... Checkers by Night
Due to a fire, Checkers Old M端nchen in Pompano Beach has temporarily moved to Diner by the Sea in Lauderdale by the Sea. Enjoy the same quality German food and beer from Checkers Old M端nchen along with the same Diner classics. Checkers Old M端nchen will open 4:00PM daily at the location of Diner by the Sea
215 Commercial Boulevard Lauderdale by the Sea, FL 954-491-0642 guymag.net
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Continued from Page 40
a FABULOUS super hero cape, or fake super hero tattooing everyone. Big backyard (your home, not your bf)? A bounce house or trampoline can be used to simulate super hero “flying.” Junk, I mean Hero Food should be colorful and reflect the super hero theme. Secret Identity Capsules are frozen juice ice cubes, or water-based ones with food coloring added. Do ice cubes in several different colors. When these are added to a clear drink, it will transform into that color, just like a “mild mannered” nobody transforms into a crimefighting action hero! Lemonade containing candy Pop Rocks will snap, crackle, pop, and do all kinds of special effects that simulate the Batman TV series’ “Boom!”and “Pow!” exploding dialogue balloons. Unleash the super baker in you with cookies shaped like bats, diamonds, lightning bolts, and question marks (for the Riddler), and use frosting and icing to color and decorate them in hero colors and emblems. For snacks that are villainous (read: sugary and fattening), fill and label dishes and bowls “Batman Droppings” (chocolate-covered peanuts and raisins), “Kryptonite” (rock candy), “Wonder Woman’s Lassos” (colored licorice whips), “Power Pellets” (M&Ms and Skittles), individual “Mr. Freeze” ice cream servings, “Catwoman Claws” (Bugles), and the “Penguin’s Party Dip” (with the chips served in an upside-down black plastic top hat). Make your own Super Hero Sandwich (or more than one, depending on the number of guests) with six-foot long sourdough bread and fill it with layers of meat, cheese, tomato, lettuce, and anything else the Super Friends care to eat. Serve sliced carrots in a serving dish labeled, “For Superman X-Ray Vision,” and include other healthy side dishes that include a label that touts the super hero-powers gained (such as Super Antioxidant Power from olives), Green Arrow Guacamole (served with red and green tortilla chips), Power Man mini-pizzas, and Aquaman Salad (tuna salad) will also be fun, fast, and filling. Caped Crimefighter Comfort Food You can bake a delicious super hero cake using any of the hundreds of commercially-available cake pans that are shaped like comic book action heroes or one of their emblems, but they are kind of spendy (costing upwards of $25 apiece online— which could be costly for a super hero on a budget). Cupcakes will accomplish the same desired result. Here are some cool color themes for “existing” costumed heroes: Batman: Frost a white or yellow cupcake with black frosting, then use yellow icing to create the “spotlight” effect of the “Bat Signal,” topping the yellow “light” with a black icing “bat” outline. Captain America: Think Fourth of July colors, with white cupcakes and red frosting. To simulate Cap’s uniform, use blue icing to pipe the outline of a star in the middle of the cupcake and fill the star with white icing.
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Maybe the Man of Steel will show up at your Superhero Party...
Hulk: These taste best when made with chocolate cake batter. When you make the cupcakes, add a glob of green icing to the center to give these yummies a delicious explosion of color and taste when bitten. Green icing on top with black icing lines across the top simulate the green brute’s veiny arms. Yummy! Silver Surfer: Coat a white cupcake with white frosting. Take a drop of black food coloring and, with a spoon, swish the coloring across the cupcake: the contrast will highlight the wavy dimensions made by the spoon. Wolverine: Use yellow frosting on a white or yellow cupcake, and add blue icing to pipe three slash marks across the top, creating Wolverine’s claw marks. Grrrrowl you go, Super Gurl!
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Guy Travel By ROBERT ELIAS DEATON
Amsterdam The GayWay City of Europe
W
e love Queen Bea. Ever since she rose to the throne as Queen of the Netherlands, Princess of OrangeNassau, Princess of Lippe-Biesterfeld and a host of other titles officially recognized as “etc. etc. etc.,” the monarch has ruled in a rather laid-back fashion over her country in North-West Europe. While commonly called “Holland” in America, that term is pars pro toto of the entire place, the capital of which is Amsterdam—home to Queen Beatrix
Queen’s Day TORRES MOLINOS
and what, at last count, was a zillion gays or so it seems when they’re all quashed together. The world as a whole, and Amsterdam in particular, celebrates Queen Bea’s birthday on April 30 (even though her actual b’day is in January. Nobody, including Beatrix it seems, wants to party in the cold). And what a party it is! The streets are lined with revelers and buskers of all descriptions, with locals selling wares, food and various items of questionable value. Most of the fun is packed into several compact areas of the city, of which our personal favorite is Reguliersdwarsstraat, a street that contains several rather old gay bars, and many newly closed ones. Regardless, that mouthful of a name is still the center of gay action in the neighborhood. Our favorite nearby fivestar hotel is the D’Europe (Nieuwe Doelenstraat 2-14), built in 1896, in a prime location along the Amstel River. Newer, but no less, posh is Banks Mansion (Herengracht 519 – 525). Housed in a renovated bank building, this boutique hotel was opened in 2004, so the plumbing all works—which in Amsterdam is no small matter. Just down the canal is the Amstel area, a local neighborhood that borders the Rembrandtplein. Just off
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this traffic-free square, you’ll find the modern Hampshire Hotel (Amstelstraat 17), with rooms starting at €90, which translates to $130, and in Amsterdam terms is dirt cheap. During the Queen’s Birthday holiday however, you will likely have to pay quite a bit more wherever you book. In Europe, it’s called marketplace pricing; in America, it’s called price gouging. If you’re feeling a bit naughty (and with all this testosterone pulsing nearby, why wouldn’t you?), look no further than Warmoesstraat. This is one of Amsterdam’s oldest streets, and now the home of an assortment of leather bars, back rooms, and saunas, and next door to the famous Red Light District. Amidst these distractions is the Greenhouse Effect (Warmoesstraat 55), a hotel that sits above its own coffee shop in a simple, eco-friendly and clean environment. That in itself is a pleasant change of pace from a city where locals think nothing about peeing in the street. Much has been written about the legal use of drugs in this city. The fact is that all recreational drugs, including marijuana, are illegal in the Netherlands. The fact that coffee houses around the city sell pot does not mean that the place isn’t strictly breaking the law. In fact, marijuana is tolerated, not legal. Should you care to debate the subtle (or not so subtle) differences between Purple Haze, Black Moroccan, Maui Wowwie, Grasstasy, Swarte Marok, Blond Marok, White Widow, Northern Light or Stonehedge, the place to go is the Grey Area Coffeeshop (Oude Leliestraat 2) near the Anne Frank House. Two Americans, who are extremely knowledgeable about all things cannabis, own the joint and are not the least bit shy about sharing their wealth of info. When it’s time to clear your lungs, head to the Vondelpark, a 120-acre public garden located in the stadsdeel Amsterdam Oud-Zuid, west from the Leidseplein and the Museumplein. And if you look really closely, you might even catch Queen Bea.
Amsterdam Hotel de L’Europe
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Guy Fitness By TOM BONANTI
The Truth Will Set You Free…and Improve Your Workouts! A few popular fitness myths exposed.
I
have been a certified personal trainer for nine years. In that time I have read a lot, heard a lot, and I’ve seen most everything. Everyone has an opinion about how to build the best biceps, how to bulk up, cut up and trim down. Some of this information has proved invaluable and some of it is just plain bull! When I work with clients, I want them to know the truth. Let’s look at some common myths that just may be holding you back, or worse yet, could cause you harm. Myth # 1: If you want to build mass, cut out the cardio. Aerobic fitness is among the most preventative medicines available. What good is having gorgeous muscles if you drop dead of a stroke or heart attack! While building solid lean muscle is important, cardio vascular fitness is essential. And the best way to “pump up” the lungs and heart is by exercising aerobically. According to the International Sports Sciences Association, three to four 30-45 minute sessions of cardio per week will definitely help to build cardiovascular fitness. Tabulate your target heart rate (220 minus your age), then try to get your heart rate to within 65 to 85 per cent of that number and keep it there for 20 minutes or so! Myth #2: I’m hurting, but if I just keep training, I can work through the pain. Only Neanderthal still believes the adage, “No pain, no gain.” This long running myth can potentially have dangerous effects on your body. There is a difference between real pain and the soreness and discomfort you feel after a really “kick-ass” workout. Experiencing pain during any fitness endeavor is a sign that your body is in trouble. Any indications of real pain should signal you to see a doctor. On the other hand, some muscle soreness can be expected a day or two after a really intense workout especially after you’ve experienced a lay off. This is called residual muscle soreness. Stretching, rest, massage and contrasting hot and cold showers can help ease this discomfort.
Myth #3: I can only get “big” if I take the latest most expensive supplements and steroids. Just because a prominent bodybuilder is pitching a particular supplement or pro-hormone in one of the muscle rags does not mean that you need to buy it or use it. You can achieve greatness in “muscledom” only by working hard in the gym, eating healthy and clean, and getting enough quality rest between workouts. Testosterone replacement therapy should be administered and monitored by a physician only, and should not be confused with juicing on anabolic steroids. Myths #4: In order to get “big” I need to workout everyday. Cumulative micro-trauma is the technical term for overtraining and it is nothing you should take lightly. Weight training every muscle group everyday without proper rest will result in muscle tears, joint pain, gross fatigue and eventually some serious injuries. Train each muscle group no more than twice a week for 20 minutes and make sure that muscle group gets 48 to 72 hours rest between training sessions. Take one to two days off from the weights each week, but stay active, do your cardio and eat properly. So there you have it – the bare-naked truth. The best way to get the body you want is through hard work, healthy eating and reading the fitness column in this publication weekly! Contact TrainerTomB@aol.com for the real truth! Tom Bonanti is a certified personal trainer and owner of Pump’n Inc Gym at 1271 NE 9th Ave, Fort Lauderdale. For more tips on how to get bigger beefier arms by summer, give me a shout at TrainerTomB@aol.com
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