Agenda Florida Edition Issue 248 by Multi-Media Platforms

FT LAUDERDALE • JACKSONVILLE • KEY WEST • MIAMI • ORLANDO • TAMPA / ST PETERSBURG

F L O R I D A A G E N D A . C O M

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FT LAUDERDALE • JACKSONVILLE • KEY WEST

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I S S U E

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MIAMI • ORLANDO • TAMPA / ST PETERSBURG

Page 12

$182 MILLION FROM SAME-SEX MARRIAGES Page 8

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2014 US OPEN TENNIS CHAMPIONSHIPS

Meet in person the all star team of Tennis for Equality and Acceptance for All.

“HIDING INSIDE THE BASELINE” Book Signing with author Bobby Blair and co-author Barry Buss

AUGUST 29th

US OPEN Bookstore from 3-4 PM (behind court 10)

MEET and receive an autographed copy of book with

Bobby Blair

Former nationally ranked and world ranked tennis player and accomplished coach.

Barry Buss

Former Nationally ranked and world ranked tennis player and author of “FIRST IN A FIELD OF TWO.”

BILLIE JEAN KING

(2009 Presidential Medal of Freedom recipient & International Tennis Hall of Fame member)

NICK BOLLETTIERI

August 20, 2014

(Legendary coach to 10 #1 players in the world and member of the International Tennis Hall of Fame)

Lz GRANDERSON

(CNN & ESPN commentator and GLAAD journalist of the year)

SVEN GROENEVELD

(Coach of multiple Grand Slam winners and former #1 players in the world. Current coach of Maria Sharapova)

“My goal for writing my life story is to play a small role towards establishing equality and acceptance for all while united we all strive to work together to be on the right side of history” – Bobby Blair Bobby Blair & Barry Buss will also be hosting a book signing at 501 Lexington Ave (corner of Lexington and 47th) Saturday, August 30th from 7-9 PM at the Segal Jensen “Celebrating Tennis in New York” venue.

BLAIR TO SIGN AUTOBIOGRAPHY AT US OPEN TOURNAMENT

The Dayton, Ohio, based Lower Miami Church of the Brethren was flying a rainbow pride flag to show its support of LGBTI people, when someone tore it down last week The church’s flag pole was broken and a rainbow LGBTI pride flag stolen on Saturday in an apparent protest against welcoming parishioners. After Pastor Nan Erbauth discovered the theft and act of vandalism, he called police—a routine with which he was fast becoming familiar. The previous Thursday, someone took the church’s rainbow flag and flew it upside-down on the flagpole, while another rainbow flag and flagpole were damaged and stolen in March of this year. The members of Lower Miami Church of the Brethren voted to become LGBTI affirming and Pastor Erbauth told 2News WDTN she fears this is why the church is being targeted. “We’re just saddened by this completely,” she said, “Because for us, God is love.We’re all about if we disagree, let’s talk. But let’s not do this. This is hateful, this is mean, and this is ugly.” Police are still investigating the latest incident.

Ex-Punter Chris Kluwe Settles with Vikings Over Same-Sex Sacking

Foundation and You Can Play, a charity run by retired NFL player Wade Davis, who is gay. Both focus on lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender issues. He did not disclose the names of the other charities, saying they hadn’t been notified yet. Kluwe averaged 44.4 yards per punt over his eight-season career in Minnesota, including a career-high 39.7 yard net average in 2012. But he ranked just 17th in the NFL in punting that season before he was cut. He hasn’t gotten a kicking job elsewhere since his release. According to Associated Press, Kluwe is considering writing a book and pursuing public speaking opportunities. Kluwe said taking a stand was worth it. “It’s always worth it,” he said. “You have a children’s game, and you have basic human rights. And there’s one of those I’m always going to value more than the other.”

For further information of the Bobby Blair book signing, contact Patricia Jensen at segaljensen@aol.com or 917-468-5777.

KEVIN MILLER

August 20, 2014 7

MINNEAPOLIS—Former pro punter Chris Kluwe and the Minnesota Vikings football team announced that they has reached a settlement and adverted a threatened lawsuit over Kluwe’s claim that he was sacked from the team last year for his outspoken views in support of same-sex marriage. Under the deal, the Vikings will donate an undisclosed sum of money to five gay rights-related charities over the next five years. Kluwe said he won’t receive any money as part of the settlement.

“This will help a lot of people that really do need that help,” Kluwe said. Kluwe reinforced that he felt that Vikings owners He said he was convince that Vikings owners Zygi and Mark Wilf were committed to being leaders on this issue in the NFL. “They want to make this a reality where there is no discrimination in sports, there is no homophobia,” Kluwe said at a news conference. Zygi Wilf said he wished Kluwe the best. “In regards to this matter, our focus remains on maintaining a culture of tolerance, inclusion and respect, and creating the best workplace environment for our players, coaches and staff,” Wilf said in the statement. Under the settlement, the Vikings also agreed to require all team employees to undergo sensitivity training four times a year. The team will also host a national symposium in Minneapolis next spring that will address LGBT issues and professional athletics, said Kluwe’s attorney, Clayton Halunen, according to Associated Press. In addition to his wrongful termination claim, Kluwe alleged that special teams co-ordinator Mike Priefer made anti-gay comments and tried to agitate him with homophobic language. Last month, the team issued a 29-page summary of a report that found no merit to Kluwe’s claim that he was wrongfully dismissed, but it confirmed that Priefer made anti-gay remarks during practice. The Vikings suspended Priefer for three games and ordered him to undergo sensitivity training. Kluwe threatened to sue the team if it didn’t release the full 150-page report, but Halunen said Tuesday that the Vikings had done a thorough investigation into Kluwe’s allegations. Halunen said he and Kluwe had initially pushed for the report’s release out of concern that there may have been a systemic problem within the organization, but they viewed the full report as part of mediation and are satisfied there are no widespread issues. Halunen identified two of the five nonprofits as the Matthew Shepard

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Police Investigate Theft of Ohio Church’s Gay Flag

MP founder and former nationally ranked tennis player Bobby Blair will appear on Friday, August 29 from 3:00 to 4:00 p.m. at the US Open Book Store during the 2014 US Open to sign his autobiography, “Hiding Inside the Baseline.” Colleagues joining Blair and co-author Barry Buss, at the on-site book signing include Billie Jean King, Nick Bollettieri, Lz Granderson of ESPN and CNN, and Sven Groenfeld, (International Coach for Maria Sharapova). The group will discuss equality in sports at the signing. In addition to Blair’s appearance at Flushing Meadow, he and Buss will appear in midtown Manhattan for a second book signing and reception on Saturday, August 30 from 7:00 p.m. to 9:00 p.m. at the Segal Jensen Tennis Market at 501 Lexington Avenue (47th and Lexington).

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NATION

$182 Million from Same-Sex Marriages

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LOCAL LGBT GOLF GROUP BY TIMOTHY HART

LOS ANGELES--The State of Florida is missing out on more than $182 million that could come from allowing same-sex couple to marry, according to a new study released Tuesday from the Williams Institute at the University of California--Los Angeles School of Law. The study suggests that more than 24,000 couples would choose to marry in Florida over the next three years, creating up to 2,626 jobs and bringing $182.2 million to the Sunshine State’s economy. According to a story reported by NBC 6 Miami, the report looked at spending by same-sex couples in other states as well as wedding expenditure and tourism data from Florida. “Our calculations indicate that the total spending on wedding arrange-

ments and tourism by same-sex couples and their guests would be approximately $182.2 million over three years, with a positive impact of $116.6 million in the first year alone,” the report said. “We estimate that total economic boost over three years would generate about $ 12.1 million in tax revenue for state and local governments.” Couples who pick Florida for destination weddings could bring even more money to the state, the report said. Florida currently has a ban on same-sex marriages, though four judges have recently found the ban unconstitutional. Florida Attorney General Pam Bondi has filed notice of appeal in Miami-Dade and Monroe County, and has said judges should stop ruling on same-sex marriage cases until the U.S. Supreme Court rules on the issue.

A local LGBT golf group exists in Broward County informally known as THE GOFFERS (named after their founder, attorney Chad Goff). THE GOFFERS are a group of South Florida gay and lesbian golfers of varying skill levels. They consist of very good, average and beginner players. Golfers from all levels of play are welcome to play with them. THE GOFFERS play regular golf rounds on Wednesdays, Saturdays and Sundays twelve months a year on championship regulation courses. Typically, they put out six (6) to eight (8) foursomes in the winter season from November to April, and two (2) to four (4) foursomes during the slower summer season. All rounds are paid individually by each golfer. Each person is assigned a handicap unless you have an official handicap. After playing in 5 rounds with them, they will assign you a computer-generated handicap and maintain the handicap for you. The maximum handicap assigned is 30. Teams are created by blind draws; however, they can sometimes honor requests for specific pairings. At the completion of the golf round, they meet in the course lounge to tally scores, have drinks or lunch, and socialize. They adhere to the strict rules of play, especially timely play. Large groups cannot afford slow play, and anyone playing golf in the summer in south Florida understands it gets mighty hot and humid. No one wants to be out in that kind of weather for 5 or 6 hours! Information on upcoming golf rounds are posted in the calendar section of their website www.thegoffers.com. Also, regular notices are issued by email message to the general membership. There are no fees related to membership in the group. In addition to the regular local outings, THE GOFFERS participate in a number of regional, national and international golf events. A number of THE GOFFERS recently participated in the International Gay Games held in Cleveland, Ohio, and one member is playing the 10th Annual German Rainbow Tournament in October in Schwerin, Germany. THE GOFFERS also have occasional local scramble tournaments as well! There are number of organizations all across the country that specifically caters to the LGBT community. Information on all of these events and organizations are available on their website www.thegoffers.com. While golf is an incredibly enjoyable sport in its own right, THE GOFFERS make the experience tantamount to a country club experience by booking your tee times, handling your handicap and pairing you with other GOFFERS. If you are in search of an enjoyable golf experience I strongly recommend you give them a try.

August 20, 2014

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SUNSHINE STATE

If you want more information about THE GOFFERS, email J.L. Quebbeman at jquebby@gmail.com. You can also follow him on Twitter under the profile jquebby and LIKE them on Facebook at www.facebook.com/the goffers. J.L. Quebbeman contributed to this article.

PHOTO OF THE WEEK

Photo taken on Wilton Drive by Agenda photographer Big Dewitte.

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Sal DeFalco

“FROM STRAIGHT TO QUEER: THEORETICAL CONCEPTS OVER A BEER” LAUNCHES TAYLOR PUCK AND INFAMOUS SAL DEFALCO ANNOUNCE GROUNDBREAKING NEW BOOK ON SEXUALITY — FROM STRAIGHT TO QUEER: THEORETICAL CONCEPTS OVER A BEER

Author contact: TayloRPuckPhDc@gmail.com.

Louie LaHue Boynton Beach , Florida

Editor’s note: Governor Rick Scott states that he has created 580,000 in private sector jobs since taking office, not 630,000. His July 2010 campaign promise to create 700,000 jobs in seven years came just after non-partisan economists at the state legislature’s Office of Economic and Demographic Research projected that Florida’s longterm job growth for July 2010-June 2018 would be slightly over one million, regardless of government intervention. To allow for this calculation, Scott promised to create 700,000 jobs in addition to those projected by the economists. While Gov. Scott has brought sizeable business growth to the state, his private sector job tally would need to total 850,000 at this point in his term to fulfill his actual campaign promise. Those facts aside, the front page article concerned U.S. Attorney General Eric Holder’s apprehension that Scott’s influence on voting procedures since his election has negatively impacted the ease of voting in Florida. If proven accurate, there is nothing disingenuous about the concern or the article. Agenda stands behind its facts as written.

August 20, 2014

WILTON MANORS--TayloR Puck, M.S., M.Ed., a sexologist known for her pluckly and uncensored sexual education, has teamed up with Studio 54’s Sal DeFalco to create a major breakthrough in American sexuality. “From Straight to Queer: Theoretical Concepts Over a Beer” is a literary project that TayloR and Sal are writing in book and screenplay format. The project will present a comprehensive understanding of sexuality to inspire critical thinking and a stronger force of advocacy and sexual education worldwide. TayloR Puck is currently finishing her doctorate in Human Sexuality Studies from Widener University. Her personal viewpoint on sexuality extends beyond years of research to her lifelong search for “the one,” Sal DeFalco’s perspective is based more on “street smarts” and a sexual history unlike any other. Their collaboration is a hot tub mix of empirical research, personal experiences, and blatent stereotyping. Together, this pair discusses every aspect of sexuality and has an inexplicable way of making the “offensive” innocuous. “From Straight to Queer: Theoretical Concepts Over a Beer” represents a milestone in the growth of sexual education as it communicates and celebrates the sexuality differences in our community.

counterfeit equality and pride. Every Florida Agenda reader in pursuit of true equality and pride, and searching for the truth, has the right to demand that of you since they demand it of themselves. So far, you fail to deliver. Now that your readers have gotten to know you, it is time for them to get to know the 25-35% of their Republican-voting fellow Gays who walk among them. Reach out to us as we reach out to you. Don’t believe the toxic lies many love to hear. Respectfully submitted,

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LISSA MOON

Letter to the Editor Dear Richard Hack, I am not surprised to read your disingenuous contrived article about the “ Federal Investigation” of Governor Rick Scott’s by the dubious Eric Holder Justice Department. Your yellow journalism is a pure partisan stunt by you and the ethically challenged Obama Administration, which poll after poll say the majority of Americans believe is no longer trustworthy on any issue. Major groups that were the backbone of the triumphant 2008 Obama coalition have turned against him on every issue of trust. A majority or strong plurality of Mellennials, Hispanics and Independents disapprove of the President and his corrupt use of IRS targeting, NSA spying, and misleading the public about Obamacare. Governor Rick Scott promised 700,000 new jobs in seven years. In less than fours years he has created 630,000 by recruiting companies to open up factories and offices in Florida. Despite your self-assured masquerade, Richard Hack, as a principled white man fighting racial oppression of minorities, we will not be bamboozled by unethical rhetoric. It is well-known that Silicon Valley sees Florida as the national epicenter for Hispanicowned high-tech firms. Moreover, most of Governor Scott’s regional and county field directors in South Florida are Black or Brown Hispanic or Caribbean-American women. One can only assume you want your defrauded readership to believe they are racists, sexists, bigots, and homophobes. By the way, why is the Florida Agenda staff conspicuously all-white males, if your are so concerned about racism and sexism? Is that your type? Thousands of respectable Democrat, Independent, and Republican Gay voters deserve better. They know what you choose to abandon in your hit piece on Governor Scott -- Character is King. Wise up, Richard Hack, and stop writing like a third class political hack. That is

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SUNSHINE LETTERS

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AS I SEE IT August 20, 2014 • ISSUE 248

BY RICHARD HACK

Gay Nuptials—Sorta

BOBBY BLAIR – CEO / MANAGING PARTNER

PUBLISHER/EDITOR-IN-CHIEF RICHARD HACK - 954-380-8563 X3101

ASSOCIATE PUBLISHER KEVIN HOPPER

EDITORIAL CONTRIBUTORS

obby Kyser, Panache Style’s owner, proved he knows how to toss a great party over last weekend with his inaugural Gay Nuptials event at the Hagen Park Community Center. But wait. I’m getting ahead of myself. First, I must admit that I had no idea that Hagen Park even had a Community Center, so out of touch am I apparently. Well, it does. It’s right back there next to the basketball courts and adjacent to the jungle gyms and plastic swing sets. It’s not a big place, as these things go—a 48-foot by 67-foot great room that passed as a convention hall of sorts for some thirty exhibitors who wanted to get their toes wet in the same-sex wedding game in Fort Lauderdale/ Wilton Manors. Yes, we know that no one can actually get married in Florida,—yet (don’t get me started). But Kyser, event planner and floral designer extraordinaire, was never one to let a

August 20, 2014

FOUNDER MULTIMEDIA PLATFORMS

Peter Jackson, Tom Bonanti, Jean Doherty, Patrick Robert, Rick Karlin, Gregg Shapiro, Collin Meyers, Grant James

little detail like that stop his plans. Lest you get confused, Michael and I are not officially wed. We’re planning on taking that leap in Maui sometime this winter when time allows, but in anticipation of that big day, we thought we would get in the mood by seeing what the locals had in store when the Sunshine State starts getting serious about attracting some of the $800 billion in discretionary income which the LGBT community has saved up for special moments like these. Nope. You didn’t read that incorrectly. We may be able to negotiate the price of an iced tea down from $2.50 to $2.00 at the flea market on any given Tuesday, but when push comes to shove, we still manage to have some bucks (as in big buck$$) put aside for events that require rings and tuxedos. Carl Vasile from Daoud’s Fine Jewelry (2473 E Sunrise Blvd) was there to cover the diamond front, while Gerry Sherman of Southern

Formals (in their new digs at 2520 N Federal Highway) handled the black tie and tails. The girls from the Westin Diplomat Resort & Spa (3555 S Ocean Drive, Hollywood) were there full of info about the robot golf instructor currently on loan to the hotel’s golf pro. The hotel is about to undercover a top to toe remodeling just in time to throw rice and catch bouquets, if you’re in the neighborhood. Closer to home, the Sonesta Fort Lauderdale (999 N Fort Lauderdale Beach Blvd) blanketed the Community Center with brochures, in case you still think that it’s still called the B Hotel. And the girls from the W Fort Lauderdale (401 N Fort Lauderdale Beach Blvd) were pitching a makeover at Bliss Spa. Something about Wedded Bliss caught Michael’s attention. Jared Pond of Stork’s (2505 NE 15th Ave) was full of info on the TWO new locations about to open for our favorite wrap and salad café (more on that in a coming issue), while Edi Mulyanto from Dapur Asian Tapas and Lounge (1620 N Federal Hwy) was serving his spring rolls and dumplings. Somehow we visited Edi’s exhibit multiple times to keep our mouths full of goodness. I wanted to eat the entire display of JP’s Chocolate Shoppe (2219 Wilton Drive), but my husband-to-be (and my GERD) kept me in check. (Okay, one little truffle, but that was my limit). Saving the best for last, we had our pic taken at the Shutter Box stand (shutterboxphotobooth.com), which is a new take on the old Arcade Photo Booth. It must be experienced to discover the fun. (Check out the pic. That’s me behind the handlebar moustache.) Oh that Bobby Kyser. He thinks of everything! . . . Until next week. . .

Photography • Dennis Dean, Big Dewitte, Tony Fowler, Dexter Pope, Yuri Rodriguez

CREATIVE DIRECTOR GEORGE DAUPHIN

ADMINISTRATIVE Jamie Forsythe

SALES & MARKETING Account Executive JOYCE BLUESTEIN joycebluestein@mmplgbt.com - 954-380-8563 x2113

NATIONAL AD REPRESENTATIVE RIVENDELL MEDIA: 212-242-6863

DISPLAY AD DEADLINES:

Camera Ready Artwork by Mondays, Noon Placement by Mondays, 5 p.m.

ALL MATERIAL in the Agenda is protected by federal copyright law and may not be reproduced without the written consent of the Agenda. The sexual orientation of advertisers, photographers, writers and cartoonists published herein is neither inferred or implied. The appearance of names or pictorial representation does not necessarily indicate the sexual orientation of that person or persons. Although this paper is supported by many fine advertisers, the Agenda cannot accept responsibility for claims made by advertisers. EDITORIAL POSITIONS of the Agenda are expressed in editorials and in editors’ notes as determined by the paper’s editors. Other opinions are those of the writers and do not necessarily represent the opinion of the Agenda or its staff. TO SUBMIT A LETTER OR COMMENTARY: Letters should be fewer than 400 words; commentaries should be fewer than 750 words. Submissions may be edited for content and length, and must include a name, address and phone number for verification. Send submissions by e-mail to Editor@floridaagenda. com by fax to 954-566-7900 or by regular mail to the Agenda office, attn: Letters/Commentary. MAIN OFFICE / SALES: 2929 E Commercial Blvd, PhD, Fort Lauderdale, FL 33308 Phone 954-380-8563 FAX 954-380-8567 A bureau of LGBTQNation.com www.floridaagenda.com Printed by Forum Publishing Group (954) 574-5321 MEDIA ADVISORY BOARD Alan Beck, Keith Blackburn, Robert Boo, Reece Darham, Richard Hack, Kevin Hopper, Paul Hugo, Peter Jackson, Krishan Manners, Terry DeCarlo, Mark Negrete, Jackson Padgett, Gary Santis, Jason Tamanini, Brett Tannenbaum, Dean Trantalis, Victor Zepka © 2014, Mutimedia Platforms LLC. All rights reserved.

FORT LAUDERDALE/ WILTON MANORS/ OAKLAND PARK The Athletic Man Castrataro Law Firm Dunkin Donuts Starbuck’s Rosie’s Bar & Grill 21st Century Dental Galanga’s Manor Village Pub Trantalis Law Firm Manor Inn Wilton Manors Library Courtyard Café Bill’s To The Moon Rock Hard Nuts About Yogurt Karl Grace Insurance Naked Grape 78 Degree Spa Out of the Closet Mark’s Haircuts Pink Submarine Atlantic Realty Sidelines Outlet Wilton Tower Tropic’s Restaurant The Gables Frank Realty Infinity Lounge Chic Optique Java Boys

Hidden Treasure Monkey Business Broward House SoBe Tanning Buddha Happy Body Tech Scissorium GLCC Pride Factory Pump N Inc Holiday Park Library Pineapple Point Joe’s Barber Shop Cubby Hole Just For Men Barber Shop Mona’s Ron’s Barber Shop 4 Men Clothing Broward House (M Project) Leatherwerks Wing & Things Ramrod Tropixxx Video Smarty Pants Clubhuose II Secret Moments Dude’s MoJo Restaurant Dennis J’s Barber Shop North Point Medical Dr. Milne Toni’s Cleaners Intense Fitness Mattress Expert Lemon Grass Clippers Too Sunrise Pawn Barnes & Noble World Gym Dapur

Out of the Closet Gateway Cinema Schubert Resort Coral Reef Guest House Royal Palms Worthington Guesthouse Grand Resort & Spa Cheston House Elysium Resort Windamar Beach Resort Plush Royale Resort Flamingo Resort Palm Plaza Coconut Cove Inn Leather Broward House Sunshine Cathedral Johnny’s The Club FTL Slammer South Boardwalk Corner Pub

JACKSONVILLE

Discotekka Gay and Lesbian Visitor Center Lambda Passages Out of the Closest Palace Food Bar Score Twist Wet Bar

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Hamburger Mary’s

Gay Mart City County Cr. Union Humpys Pizza Juice Blendz Tee Jay Mix Clothing Alibi’s Fusion J. Miles The Drive Rumors Bona Pizza Le Patio Restaurant Office CVS Stork’s Rowan Tree Medical Walgreen’s Specialty Jenkins Law Genesis Decades Furniture Bo’s Barber The Cabanas Bio Care Pharmacy BioScript Pharmacy Florida Bank Barton Miller Cleaners Almost New Boca Tanning Rendez-vous Bakery Fort Lauderdale Pizza Lips Pride Pharmacy Fredrick Fine Art Ponciana Car Wash Lace to Lust Scandals The Stable Grüm Care Resource

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CLEARWATER AREA

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Distribution Locations

ORLANDO

Barcodes Club Orlando Gay and Lesbian Center Hamburger Mary’s Hank’s Parliament House Pulse RBARR Savoy St Dorothy’s Catholic Community St. Matthew’s Tavern

In Cahoots ST. PETE Flamingo The Metro The New Boot Rack Saloon Georgie’s Alibi Metro Wellness Center Park Place Oar House

KEY WEST

Bourbon Street Pub Equator Resort Island House New Orleans’s House The 801

MIAMI

Care Resource Center Club Aqua Club Sugar

TAMPA AREA

Baxter’s Bradley’s on 7th City Side Bar City Solutions GBar Hamburger Mary’s Liquid Lounge MC Film Ybor Resort Spa

August 20, 2014

FloridaAgenda.com For advertising or sponsorship opportunities, contact Kevin Hopper at 954-380-8563 x2101 or kevinhopper@mmplgbt.com.

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COVER STORY BY RICHARD HACK

WHAT’S MISSING IN THIS YEAR’S PRIMARY? (The Answer Will Surprise You)

August 20, 2014

o next Tuesday is the Florida primary. Let me repeat that. Primary. Next Tuesday. August 26th. Depending on the part of the state in which you live, there are many, many candidates on the ballot. Mayors, city commissioners, state senators and congressmen, school board members, and judges. Lots and lots of judges. And then there’s the biggest prize of all--the various parties’ candidates for governor of the state. We’ve all heard a lot about the race to select the gubernatorial nominee of the Democratic party— Charlie Crist or Nan Rich. (Nan you’ll remember as the former Florida state senator; Charlie as the former Republican governor.) While incumbent governor Rick Scott is running for reelection, it may surprise you to know that he’s not the only Republican candidate on the ballot. Elizabeth Cuevas-Neunder, founder of the Puerto Rican Chamber of Commerce of Florida, is running against Scott, as is Yinka Adeshina, whose creditials are unknown. Third party candidates include Adrian Wyllie (Libertarian) and unaffiliated candidates Joe Allen, Glenn Burkett and Farid Khavari. Florida is one of the few remaining states (there’s 12 in all) that utilize a closed primary process. That means you must be a registered party member to vote in your party’s primary. So, the candidates are poised for victory or defeat, their campaign signs sprouting around town like weeds, and the polling sites are ready to accept ballots. The only thing missing is YOU. That is correct. In a non-Presidential campaign year, primary elections are slow draws. In some counties across the state, a good turn-out is ten percent. Split among party lines, Republicans are more likely to vote in primaries than Democrats because of the essential make-up of the party themselves. Republicans are more-often older, wealthier, whiter, more likely to be homeowners, more educated ... and more ideological. Democrats are younger, more likely to need government assistance, ethnically mixed, home renters, with a strong loyalty to causes. Independents are an assorted lot. Determined not to be pigeon-holed, they gravitate between candidates, investigating the options and deciding items on an issue-by-issue

basis. Because of the closed primary process, they often feel disenfranchised by the candidate selection process. Getting ANY of you to vote in primaries, however, has been increasing difficult, which is especially frustrating for the candidates who devote so much energy and cash to their campaigns. Local primaries are particularly important in that their outcomes determine available services, taxes, operating hours, and contracts. Additionally, citizen-initiated statewide ballot measures are not included in primary elections, and are always a major driving factor in traditional November elections, leaving voting in August a little like having dinner but skipping dessert. The primary election. It’s all about involvement in your community and your representatives. As an LGBT community, how can we ever expect to be taken seriously by politicians if we approach elections

with blasé disinterest? Curtis Gans, director of the Center for the Study of the American Electorate, wrote a study that found much of the failure to vote has less to do with convenience than with increasingly negative campaigns. Gans believes attack ads that lead voters to believe they have a choice between “bad and awful” has contributed to low voter turnout, as has a decline in faith in government, new voters who grew up in households where their parents didn’t vote, and technology that has, “made grazing the Internet a substitute for reading the news.” As we said, Tuesday is the Florida primary, Let me repeat that. Primary. Next Tuesday. August 26th. Vote. Please.

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15) MONA’S 502 E Sunrise Blvd Fort Lauderdale

14) THE MANOR 2345 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors

13) LIPS 1421 E Oakland Park Blvd Oakland Park

12) LE PATIO 2401 NE 11th Ave Wilton Manors

30) VILLAGE PUB 2283 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors

29) TROPICS 2000 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors

28) 13 I EVEN 2037 Wilton Dr Wilton Manors

27) THE STABLE 205 E Oakland Park Blvd Fort Lauderdale

25) SMARTY PANTS 2400 E Oakland Park Blvd Fort Lauderdale 26) THE DRIVE 2390 Wilton Dr Wilton Manors

24) SIDELINES 2031 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors

23) SCARFONE’S 2150 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors

22) SCANDALS SALOON 3073 NE 6th Ave Wilton Manors

21) RUMORS BAR & GRILL 2426 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors

20) ROSIE’S BAR & GRILL 2449 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors

19) RAMROD 1508 NE 4th Ave Fort Lauderdale

18) NEW YORK GRILLED CHEESE 2207 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors

17) NAKED GRAPE 2163 Wilton Drive Wilton manors

16) MONKEY BUSINESS 2740 N Andrews Ave Fort Lauderdale

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11) JOHNNY’S 1116 W Broward Blvd Fort Lauderdale

10) JMARK’S 1245 N Federal Hwy Fort Lauderdale

9) INFINITY LOUNGE 2184 WIlton Drive Wilton Manors

8) HUNTERS NIGHTCLUIB 2232 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors

7) GREGARIOUS 2033 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors

6) DAPUR 1620 N Federal Hwy Fort Lauderdale

5) CUBBY HOLE 823 N Federal Hwy Fort Lauderdale

4) CORNER PUB 1915 N Andrews Ave Wilton Manors

3) BOARDWALK 1721 N Andrews Ave Fort Lauderdale

2) BILL’S FILLING STATION 2209 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors

1) ALIBI 2266 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors

BAR MAP

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August 20, 2014

BY RICK KARLIN

The Grand Resort and Spa

STAYCATIONS

here are times when you just want to get away from it all, but don’t have the time to plan a vacation. That’s when it’s time for a “stayacation,” acting like a tourist in your own city. Luckily you live in a city where there are tons of resorts, making it easy to get away from it all without ever leaving town. Book a room (hell go for a suite, you don’t have any travel expenses) and enjoy your hometown like a tourist. Take in a show at the Broward Center for Performing Arts, Living Arts Theater or the “Summer Shorts” short play festival from Island City Stage. Wander down Las Olas, eat at restaurants you’ve never tried and generally just act like a tourist (hopefully you’ll drive better than they do). The Grand Resort and Spa (539 N. Birch Rd., Fort Lauderdale, 954-6303000) is the area’s largest gay owned and operated men’s resort hotel. Located just steps from the beach, it rivals the luxury and style found in most popular boutique hotels. If you’re looking for a staycation where you can be pampered, the staff at The Grand pays close personal attention to guests’ desires and is available 24/7. Many guests liken the attention to that one might expect at small guesthouses. The personal service has been noted by GayTravel.net, “The genuine hospitality of their staff sets them apart from the other boutique hotels.” It is a gay resort with its’ own full-service day spa and hair studio and can provide an experience that is unique and indulgent from a relaxing massage to facial or manipedi. Out Traveler Magazine declared, “One of the 10 best luxe gay spas in the U.S.” It was also named a “Top 10” for 2014 by the Travel Channel. The only gay property on this year’s list! Among the spa/ resort packages available are “Romance by the Sea,” which includes two nights in a junior suite, one bedroom suite, or one bedroom penthouse, champagne or wine upon arrival, gourmet chocolates, two souvenir Grand Resort logo robes and a choice of a 50-minute couples’ massage or a

COURTESY OF HE GARND RESORT

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18 August 20, 2014

TRAVEL

50 minute couples’ facial. The package, for couples only, ranges in price from $545$645 depending upon room selection. The “Quick Chill” package features three nights in a room or suite, choice of either a 50 minute Swedish or 50 minute deep tissue massage, a facial and a bottle of champagne on arrival. Prices quoted are for single occupancy and double occupancy; $533-$723 for a courtyard room, $625-$815 pool view room category, $655-$845 junior suite and $791-$981 for a one bedroom. For a longer stay, the “Get Pampered Getaway” includes five nights in a choice of room or suite, choice of either a 50 minute Swedish or 50 minute deep tissue massage, a facial, a choice of either a glacier salt body scrub or a “Jack Black” signature body scrub, a choice of either an exfoliating manicure or standard pedicure and a bottle of champagne on arrival. Priced from $891-$1,209 for a courtyard room, $1042-$1,359 for pool view room and $1092-$1,409 for a junior suite. Note: there are no substitutions on spa services quoted in packages. Prices quoted are in effect through Sept. 30 and include taxes, but not gratuities. The Cabanas Guesthouse & Spa (2209 N.E. 26th St., Wilton Manors, 954-5647764) is the only all-male, clothing

optional, waterfront gay resort located in Wilton Manors. The entire resort is meticulously landscaped with royal palms, gorgeous flowers, and lush foliage. Summer rates, good through Oct. 15 range from $99 a night to $179 a night, with discounts for longer stays. Room choices include queen standard or waterfront rooms, double standard or premium, king standard or premium waterfront rooms and one or two-bedroom suites. Each room is equipped with entertainment systems and a vast DVD library is available. The Cabanas offers kayak and bike rentals, high-speed DSL and free Wi-Fi throughout the grounds. A variety of spa packages are available at Cabanas. The “Honeymoon Package” includes a three-night stay in a onebedroom waterfront suite and treatments for two including one hour massages, facials, body scrubs/wraps or manicures/ pedicures, lunch, a dozen roses, a fruit tray, a crudite tray, as well as a Babor men’s cosmetics gift. The summer rate is $1255. For singles, the “Gentlemen’s Retreat” includes a two night stay, a one hour massage, a body wrap and an exfoliation for $370. The “Lover’s Relaxation” package includes a two-night stay, and pair of one hour massages and exfoliations/wraps. This

package is available for couples only and is $490 during the summer season (a savings of more than $140 over high season). The “Celebration” package features a two-night stay, a one-hour aromatherapy massage and an anti-aging facial treatment. The $370 package is based upon single accommodation. www.thecabanasguesthouse.com. Of course, if you’re looking for a bit more of a getaway, Key West is not that long of a drive. The Equator Resort (818 Fleming St., Key West, 305-294-7775) is in the heart of Key West’s old town district on historic Fleming Street and just a short walk to Duval Street, home of fabulous restaurants and night life. Enjoy the clothing optional pool deck sipping cocktails and listening to the tropical birds and the trickling of a fountain and let the rest of the world slip away. Room rates are the cheapest they get at this time of year, only $200 for a tworoom king bed poolside suite, complete with a wet bar, or $187 for a king room with private two-man whirlpool. If you’re on a budget, a regular queen room is only $140 a night. Summer rates are in effect until Oct. 15. A quick check on Yelp featured overwhelmingly positive reviews and even mentioned that the place was dog friendly.

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A whole new kind of cruising.

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No matter which way you go, you’re always headed in the right direction in Key West. fla-keys.com/gaykeywest 305.294.4603 A ISL KEY W EST

New Orleans House The only all male guesthouse on Duval Street. Part of the Bourbon Street Pub Complex. Stay where you play! 888-293-9893 or 305-293-9800 neworleanshousekw.com

MARA

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The Reach, A Waldorf Astoria Resort Escape to a refined haven, and experience gentle breezes of the Atlantic Ocean, gracefully silhouetted by breathtaking Key West sunsets. 888-318-4316 or 305-296-5000 reachresort.com

August 20, 2014

Island House Award-winning clothing-optional resort for men. Luxurious rooms. Poolside café and bar. Gym, sauna, steamroom, Jacuzzis. Poolside massage pavilion. 800-890-6284 or 305-294-6284 islandhousekeywest.com

BIG PINE KEY & THE LOWER KEYS

August 20, 2014

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August 20, 2014

BY TOM BONANTI

SUPER FIT OR SUPER TOXIC??

August 20, 2014

ongratulations! You work out five times a week, stay away from junk food, and take your vitamins every day. On the surface you are doing everything correctly. You should be full of vim and vigor, ready to greet life with a smile and a song, right?! But the truth is, you often feel tired, listless, crappy, and you just can’t figure out why. Think a little harder. There are those Thursday nights when you down a few too many Long Island Iced Teas. The next morning you crawl out of bed hung over so you medicate yourself with pain killers to get through the day. Often you get up too late and skip breakfast, and instead of a nutritious lunch, you opt for a junk food fix. Then there are those Sunday afternoon Tea Dances where you dance your ass off till the wee hours of the morning instead of getting the rest you need for the week ahead. Combine all of these factors with daily stress, eating processed foods, not drinking enough filtered H2O and

breathing in “God knows what” from the atmosphere and it’s no wonder you don’t always feel like Superman. In fact, you may be more toxic than you realize. Any or all of the above factors can cause a build up in your system of evil villains called free radicals. These bitches are highly toxic oxygen molecules that can be found in the atmosphere, in foods, and in you. Free radicals cause chemical imbalances in the body referred to as “oxidative stress.” This condition has been linked to heart disease, cancer, hypertension, diabetes, Alzheimer’s disease, tissue inflammation, musculo-skeletal problems and a host of other illnesses. And if all of this isn’t horrible enough, free radicals speed up the aging process by causing wrinkles, muscle atrophy and impotence! The best way to counteract the ravages of free radicals comes from conscious lifestyle changes. Start with simple things. Quit smoking. Drink less. Eat smaller meals more frequently

Green tea is one of the most powerful antioxidants known to man…

PHOTO BY KULECZKA

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HEALTH

throughout the day. Cut saturated fats and other junk from your diet. Supplementation with antioxidants is also vital to your battle with free radicals. Antioxidants are natural foods or carefully compounded supplements that “kick ass” on free radicals and help restore normal function to your body and its tissues. The antioxidants vitamins C and E help reverse oxidative stress by ridding the body of free radicals thereby returning it to optimal homeostasis. This is crucial for athletes who want to be in tip top shape by maintaining

muscle metabolism and pulmonary stability. Never underestimate the power of a fruit! Wild blueberries, raspberries, strawberries, cranberries, bilberries and pomegranates are all potent antioxidants. Green tea is one of the most powerful antioxidants known to man in its ability to prevent 1) viral and bacterial activity, 2) lung cancer due to smoking, 3) skin damage and skin cancer due to radiation (sun damage) and a host of other age related maladies. Native to China and Japan, the ginko tree lives over 1000 years. Ginko Biloba has been

shown to 1) reduce blood clots, 2) regulate blood pressure, 3) prevent the formation of free radicals, 4) increase the flow of blood to the brain, and 5) improve alertness and short-term memory. As with any supplement, always check with your doctor first before taking them. The aim here is to reduce toxicity, not induce it! For more information on good nutrition and exercise, contact trainertomb@ aol.com. Check out www. pumpnincgym.com and call Tom (954) 557-1119 today to schedule a free intake.

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August 20, 2014

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BY CHEF JEAN DOHERTY

• 13 ¼ lbs. lobster heads • 2 tbsp olive oil • 1 small onion, chopped • 1 carrot, chopped • 2 shallots, chopped • 1 sprig thyme • 1 bay leaf • 1 large tomato • 1 tbsp tomato puree •1 tsp cayenne pepper, plus extra to serve • 1 tbsp brandy • A pint of dry white wine • A pint of heavy cream •8 tsp Armagnac brandy (I used paddy whiskey)

browned, add the thyme and bay leaf and the lobster heads, stirring so that they don’t stick or burn. Add the tomatoes, tomato purée, cayenne pepper and the brandy. Stir well, then add the wine. Bring to a boil and cook for at least 3 minutes. Add the fish stock and bring back to a boil. Season lightly with sea salt. Simmer for 30 minutes, stirring occasionally and skimming off any scum that appears on the surface. Drain through a colander set over a clean saucepan pressing the lobster bones well to extract all the juices and flavor. It’s a lot of work to pick all the meat outta them heads… but it’s well worth it… the results will astound you. Bring the soup back to a boil and allow it to reduce. Pass it through your electric blender, adding up to a pint of heavy cream, and season again, according to your taste. Garnish with cayenne pepper and parsley or chives to taste. You are the chef!

• Sea salt

smooth, creamy, highly seasoned soup of French origin. It’s rich and decadent. It’s classically based on a strained broth or “coulis” of crustaceans. It can be made from lobster, crab, shrimp or crayfish.

August 20, 2014

• 2 pints of fish stock

SUBMITTED PHOTO

Heat the olive oil in a thick-assed saucepan and cook the onion, carrot and celery over a low heat. When the vegetables are lightly

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ero and I were at the beach this morning, and we met a snorkeler in the car park after our swim. He was taking the tails off lobsters and throwing the heads on the ground. I asked him what he was going to do with the heads, and he offered them to me. Needless to say, I ran to the car and whipped out the cooler bag, and we bagged ‘em....so, FRESH lobster bisque was in the making! A bisque is a

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LOBSTER BISQUE

RECIPE

BY PATRICK ROBERT

THE WEEK

August 20, 2014

So Rad Polylust, So Edgy Tori & So Gay Poetry

PHOTO BY TOM HURST

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The Week 8/21-8/27

The History Boys August 21st, at the Mad Cow Theatre in Orlando

8/21

8/22

The History Boys Orlando

Tom Arnold Florida Keys and Key West Museums & Attractions Weekend Jacksonville

British playwright Alan Bennett’s Tony award-winning 2004 play makes its way to the Mad Cow Theatre for a month of performances. The play focuses on the British education system’s problematic standards, emphasized by the contrasting styles of two English teachers: Hector—an eccentric veteran teacher interested in knowledge for knowledge’s sake—and Irwin—a newer teacher with a more cynical and ruthless style of teaching. Both teachers are gay and possibly pedophilic, an issue the play handles with a strange acceptance. Hector’s “touching” of the boys is seen as cute rather than dark. Still, this is one of the most acclaimed plays of the past decade. 7:30 p.m. Mad Cow Theatre. 54 West Church Street. Orlando. 32801.

Key West and the Florida Keys are known for their rich history and refined museums. Whether it’s the Harry S. Truman Little White House, Pigeon Key, Crane Point Museum & Nature Center, or the Key West Aquarium, visitors are never at a loss for attractions to explore. This weekend during the “Florida Keys and Key West Museums and Attractions Weekend,” South Florida residents and visitors can experience these places through a weekend full of free or reduced admission to more than twenty participating museums. Attendees must log onto www.wirn.org and click on the banner to print out the free weekend pass. Various times and locations. Key West. 33040.

Roseanne Barr’s controversial ex, Tom Arnold, will be performing his stand-up routine tonight at The Comedy Zone. Arnold began his career in stand-up, where he met the legendary sitcom star, Roseanne. From there, he guest-starred on her classic series before briefly landing his own. Since then, he has had a successful career in both films and television. His stand-up comedy is never scripted, though usually consists of him poking fun at his Midwest past, listing off his marital follies, or recalling absurd Hollywood stories. 8:00 p.m. The Comedy Zone. 3130 Hartley Rd. Jacksonville. 32257.

To have your event listed, please email editor@floridaagenda.com

8/25

Tailgate Taste Fest Tampa Bay

Polylust Burlesque Show Orlando

Sandra Simonds: Creative Writing Workshop

“The Personal is Political” Miami

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Tori Amos Miami Beach

cides” revolves around the Lisbon sisters—a group of young girls in affluent Grosse Pointe, Michigan, who are controlled by their overprotective, authoritarian parents. Polylust is a radical, body-positive The atmospheric movie includes a burlesque and drag troupe based hypnotic score by Air and features in Orlando. Combining high-gloss songs by Heart, The Hollies, ELO, Dollar Store mystique with androg- and Todd Rundgren. 9:30 p.m. Enynous make-up and stylings, Polyl- zian Theater. 1300 South Orlando ust hopes to promote radical selfAve. Maitland. 32751. love with “queerlesque fanfare.” Tonight they will perform their high-kicking, evocative burlesque show at Will’s Pub. The featured 8/27 performers include Joanie Waters, Havana Gold, Chesty McArthur, J. Bird, Lolita Catua, and Bessie Mae Asian tapas lounge Dapur hosts this Mucho. 9:00 p.m. Will’s Pub. 1042 month’s premiere LGBT networking N. Mills Avenue. Orlando. 32803. event, The Mix. Each month, Guy Magazine and the Wilton Manors Development Alliance present two hours of cocktails and hors 8/26 d‘oeuvres for Wilton Manors’ business professionals. Rub shoulders with lawyers, advertising agents, writers from this magazine, and many other successful professionEnzian theater doesn’t just offer als from our glittering community. films, it also offers a dinner during The Mix allows for new business the screening, much like Williamsopportunities and chances to grow burg’s famed Nitehawk Theater. start-ups. This week’s Mix also ofAnd like that theater, Enzian Thefers a chance to win a $500 adverater holds special screenings of tising certificate with Guy Magazine classic cult films as well. Tonight they show Sophia Coppola’s break- and Agenda. Come enjoy a few through film, “The Virgin Suicides.” drinks and strong connections. 6:30 p.m. Dapur. 1620 N. Federal HighBased on the acclaimed novel by Jeffrey Eugenides, “The Virgin Sui- way. Fort Lauderdale. 33305.

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will explore the themes of how to destroy systems of oppression through the reading of poetry by Amy King, Stephen Mills, Eileen The football season brings with it Myles, and others. In the second many things: lazy Sundays by the hour, each participant will generTV, fantasy football, and one of ate one poem through an experiAmerica’s greatest traditions—tail- mental writing exercise that blends gating. Curtis Hixon Park will be the personal and the political. unveiling the inaugural Tamp Bay’s More events throughout the week Tailgate Taste Fest. Here, top rescan be found on Reading Queer’s taurants from around Tampa Bay website www.readingqueer.org. will showcase their best tailgate 2:!5 p.m. The offices of O, Miami. dishes. Serving as the unofficial 2138 Biscayne Blvd. Miami. 33137. kickoff to the 2014 football season, this event includes food ranging from chicken, ribs sliders, Cuban sandwiches, and unique side 8/24 dishes. The Fest will also include family-friendly games and live entertainment throughout the day. Tori Amos came to prominence 11:00 a.m. Curtis Hixon Park. 600 in the mid-1990s with her lyrically N. Ashley Dr. Tampa Bay. 33602. provocative, sensitively written music. Songs questioning God’s motives or an acapella description of rape made Tori Amos one of the voices of angsty generation X. Classic albums like “Under the Reading Queer promotes queer Pink,” “Little Earthquakes,” and literary culture in South Florida “Boys for Pele” established her as through creative writing worka commercial and critical success. shops, a literary salon series, a She is also a classically trained piliterary archive, and this annual anist with a mezzo-soprano vocal literary festival, which continues range. Tonight her piano playing throughout the week. Tonight, and vocal chops will be on full dispoet Sandra Simonds leads a play in Miami Beach. 8:00 p.m. The workshop that focuses on the poli- Fillmore Miami Beach. 1700 Washtics of queer poetry. The first hour ington Ave. Miami Beach. 33139.

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8/23

The Mix Fort Lauderdale

Cult Classic: The Virgin Suicides at Enzian Theater Maitland

The Virgin Suicides (8/26)

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August 20, 2014

BY GREGG SHAPIRO

GIVE AND TAKE

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SCREEN SAVOR

“The Giver”

August 20, 2014

PROMOTIONAL STILL

he film version of “The Giver” (TWC), based on the cherished dystopian Y/A novel by Lois Lowry that predates “The Hunger Games” and “Divergent” by nearly 20 years, does a first-rate job of including Oscar-winning actors, such as Meryl Streep and Jeff Bridges, alongside promising younger talent to bring this tale of memory and manipulation to the big screen. A pet project of Bridges’, who plays the titular character, a role he originally wanted for his late father Lloyd, “The Giver” has plenty to offer. Following The Ruin of the future, communities were constructed in which people minded the border, obeyed the curfew, followed every rule and did the job they were assigned. All of this and more was done in an effort to eliminate the conflicts, wars and annihilation of the past. In a (literally) black & white world where being different was frowned upon, Jonas (Brenton Thwaites) saw things differently. It was something he couldn’t share with his mother (Katie Holmes in all her “Stepford” glory), father (Alexander Skarsgård), sister Lilly (Emma Tremblay) or best friends Asher (Cameron Monaghan) and Fiona (Odeya Rush). Jonas isn’t the only one aware of his difference and at the Ceremony of Advancement, held for teens his age to get their work assignments, Jonas is singled out by the ominous Chief Elder (Streep), and her equally menacing hair, to be The Receiver to Bridges’ Giver, and have all the past wisdom and memories of the world and society transmitted to him. It’s both an awesome responsibility and a luxury, as all restrictions are lifted

from Jonas, as he witnesses scenes involving love (they couldn’t include a single same-gender couple?), war, religion, nature, man’s inhumanity to man, and so on. However, Jonas and the Giver must proceed cautiously considering the terrible fate met by Rosemary (Taylor Swift), the previous Receiver. As the past is revealed to Jonas, and begins to color his world, so to speak, he finds himself in an unexpected position of power. It’s a given, if you will, that “Hunger Games” and “Divergent” fans will receive “The Giver” with open arms. Also, having a hot guy such as Thwaites as the lead character gives teen girls and gay guys something to look at while taking in the story, and all of its political and social implications, and the action.

The late Robin Williams was a gifted comedic and dramatic actor. Sadly, you’d never know that by watching “The Angriest Man in Brooklyn” (Lionsgate), now on DVD + Digital, one of Williams’ final films before his untimely passing. Told via dismal voiceovers by the titular character Henry (Williams) and a doctor named Sharon (Mila Kunis), as well as inferior flashback sequences, “The Angriest Man in Brooklyn” is essentially about what one man thinks are his final 90 minutes alive before a brain aneurysm kills him. This movie is so awful that you might envy Henry’s plight. The supporting cast, including Melissa Leo as Henry’s estranged wife Bette, Hamish Linklater as his estranged son Tommy,

Peter Dinklage as his brother Aaron, Louis C.K. as his M.I.A. doctor, James Earl Jones as an electronics store clerk (in a shockingly offensive scene involving stuttering) and Richard Kind as estranged classmate Bix is utterly wasted. Director Phil Alden Robinson (“Field of Dreams”) ought to be ashamed. Not only is “The Angriest Man in Brooklyn” not in the least bit entertaining or amusing, it’s also shockingly prescient. Henry’s tombstone reads 1951-2014, the same lifespan as Williams. Following his prognosis, Henry is suicidal and even attempts to take his own life by jumping off of a bridge. The equation for comedy is supposed to be tragedy + time. There will never be enough time passing to make this bomb palatable.

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Copyright © 2014 The Werks Company, LLC. All Rights Reserved. Werks, LeatherWerks, PaddleWerks, Lifestyle Club, BootWerks and “Where Leather is a Lifestyle” are Registered Trademarks of The Werks Company, LLC

The Parish of Sts Francis & Clare Staffed by Franciscan Friars

Rediscover Catholicism

August 20, 2014

Mass Times:

Saturday 5 PM, Sunday 10:30 AM & Wednesday 7 PM

Baptisms, Weddings, Holy Unions

954-731-8173

101 NE 3rd STREET FORT LAUDERDALE www.stsfrancisandclare.org Ecumenical Catholic Church

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August 20, 2014

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