FLORIDAAGENDA.COM NOVEMBER 13, 2013 H ISSUE 208
Florida Lags Behind Page 8
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ISLAND CITY ARTWALK, MIAMI BEACH JAZZ FESTIVAL & FEMALE TROUBLE page 16
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— Eliza Byard, Ph.D., Executive Director, Gay, Lesbian & Straight Education Network (GLSEN)
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“Nobody talked about bullying of LGBT students. We teamed up to help make schools safer for everyone.”
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For more than 20 years, the Gay, Lesbian & Straight Education Network (GLSEN) has been bringing LGBT bullying issues into the national conversation by making schools safer for all our kids. With help from Wells Fargo, GLSEN has delivered a Safe Space Kit to every middle and high school in America. Wells Fargo is proud to support GLSEN’s work to improve the environment of our schools and teach respect. Because when people talk, great things happen. To find out how Wells Fargo can help in your local community, visit wellsfargo.com/commitment.
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SUNSHINE STATE
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Battle of the Sexes Tennis Set for Charity
Our Fund National LGBT Leadership Forum
BRIAN NEAL FITNESS PROVIDERS DINNER
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ersonal trainers, healthcare providers, and others who volunteer their time and services as part of the Brian Neal Fitness and Health Foundation, met on Thursday at Dapur Asian Tapas and Lounge. Among those present were David Levison and Peter Jackson (in photo above), as well as J. Michael of Mind Body Spirit and Jim O’Hay. Brian Neal seized the opportunity to launch the “All Star Team of 100” campaign, with the goal of gaining 100 supporters, who will receive benefits in return for a contribution of $100 a month. For more information, go to BrianNealFitness.org
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On Monday November 11, the community foundation known as “Our Fund” hosted their third annual National LGBT Leadership Forum in downtown Fort Lauderdale, at the Horvitz Auditorium, adjacent to the Museum of Arts Fort Lauderdale. Moderated by Lee Rubin, a community leader, philanthropist, and member of Our Fund’s board of directors, the
event featured a roundtable discussion on the “future strategy to achieve full equality,” according to the organization’s official site. Featured panelists included
GUYMAG
New York, NY – This weekend, Sir Elton John and Andy Roddick will take on Venus Williams and Marion Bartoli in a doubles match to raise funds for AIDS charities. Though John is a music superstar, he is also an avid tennis fan who plays frequently and wrote the song “Philadelphia Freedom” for Billie Jean King in the 1970s. “For more than 20 years, Mylan WTT Smash hits has been one of the most rewarding and meaningful events in tennis,” said King in a recent press release. “Having both Venus and Andy as part of this year’s event and returning to the Orlando area will help us continue the momentum we set with last year’s record-breaking event.” Over the past two decades, John and King have teamed up for Mylan WTT Smash Hits, which has raised more than $11.5 million for the Elton John AIDS Foundation (EJAF) and various local AIDS charities since 1993. This year’s 21st annual event will benefit EJAF and the Hope and Help Center of Central Florida. A portion of the funds raised will be specifically targeted for local programs. “It is always such a great pleasure to co-host this wonderful event with
my dear friend Billie Jean King,” said Sir Elton John. “I’m so pleased that we will be teaming up wth the Hope and Help Center of Central Florida to raise awareness about the continuing challenges of the HIV/AIDS epidemic both locally and nationally and to raise urgently needed dollars for community-based HIV prevention, education, treatment, and care services. I urge all of the tennis fans and concerned citizens in the Greater Orlando area to support this event and bring their families for a wonderful evening of tennis for a great cause.” The action begins at 6 p.m., with a pre-match VIP reception and auction kicking off at 4:30 p.m. For more information on tickets, visit orlandogaytravel. com/smashhits or call 321-800-3947.
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FRED & SUSAN MULLANE/CAMERAWORK USA
Andy Roddick
Kevin Cathcart (executive director of Lambda Legal), Rea Carey (executive director for the National Gay & Lesbian Task Force), Paul Smith (law partner for Jenner & Block, Washington, D.C.), and Nadine Smith (executive director of Equality Florida). “Since 2008, there’s been a dramatic shift in favor of marriage equality,” Nadine Smith said in a video for Miami Herald’s Steve Rothaus. “More than half of the state supports marriage equality, and even when you talk about likely voters, we have it right around that 50% mark. Telling the true stories of our lives, the love stories, are what people connect with. Gay couples, we marry for the same reasons that anyone has ever been in love understands... That’s what’s changes hearts and minds. That’s what will create the context in which the courts will decide, or if we must, we go back to the polls to secure full marriage equality in Florida.”
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EDITORIAL BY GRANT JAMES NOVEMBER 13, 2013 • ISSUE 208
Will Florida be the Last State to Allow Same-Sex Marriage?
FOUNDER MULTIMEDIA PLATFORMS
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his past week, Illinois and Hawaii both cleared the way to legalize same-sex marriage. Though effective dates have not been announced yet, both states will seemingly see gay marriages in the very near future. If all goes according to plan, this means 16 out of 50 states will allow gay marriage. That’s roughly 1/3 of the country: almost halfway there. Illinois has been the next state up for quite some time now, but Hawaii was sort of a curve ball. No one really knew it was coming until President Obama was pushing for the bill to pass. It is the president’s home state, and we all know that Obama has been an advocate for same-
BOBBY BLAIR – CEO / MANAGING PARTNER
Recent gay rights demonstration in Illinois
sex marriage this term. But what about the Sunshine State? Sure, Equality Florida is fighting the good fight, doing everything that they can to bring same-sex marriage to the sunny shores of our state, but with Marco Rubio hosting an anti-gay fundraiser this week, things don’t seem bright for Florida. The Sun Sentinel posted an article this week titled “Florida: Stop fighting gay rights.” They pointed out that this year, Florida lawmakers rejected a statewide domestic partnership registry that would have granted health care visitation, and other rights, to same-sex couples. They also reported that a Broward County Republican Party leader, Cara Pavalock, almost lost her job for simply voicing support for marriage equality. They state that in order for Florida to compete with other states, “we must embrace our great diversity, in all dimensions.” Why is diversity a crime, and when will it finally be accepted in our beautiful, sunny state? We aren’t sure, but we’re hoping that we won’t be the last state to join the 21st century. In the meantime, all we can do is continue to support organizations that push for marriage equality.
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NATION
Thomas Bach
laws with respect to foreign nationals?” The letter ends with a thank you and is signed by the twelve senators: Chris Murphy, Barbara Boxer, Jeff Merkley, Dick Durbin, Lisa Murkowski, Jeanne Shaheen, Sheldon Whitehouse, Claire McCaskill, Al Franken, Elizabeth Warren, Chris Coons, and Mark Udall.
First Transgender Cochair Appointed by GLAAD
Donald Trump Is ‘Evolving’ On LGBT Rights New York, NY – Just before the Miss Universe pageant went live, Donald Trump talked to MSNBC anchor Thomas Roberts about marriage equality in the U.S. and LGBT rights in Russia. The billionaire went on to say that his views on LGBT rights and marriage equality are “evolving,” with his position on the issues falling somewhere “in the middle.” “I think that it’s an evolving process,
Four Idaho Couples Sue for Marriage Equality Boise, ID – On the heels of marriage equality passing the vote in both Hawaii and Illinois, Idaho may become the next state to welcome the bill. The four couples from Boise are arguing that the state’s ban on same-sex marriage violates the U.S. Constitution’s guarantees of equal protection, according to a press release from the National Center for Lesbian Rights, which is representing the couples (in addition to attourneys Deborah A. Ferguson and Craig Durham). The couples suing the state are Sue Latta and Traci Ehlers, Sheila Robertson and Andrea Altmayer, Amber Beierle and Rachel Robertson, and Lori and Sharene Watsen. “Sharene and I were legally married in New York and had a wedding celebration here in Boise with more than 200 supportive family members and friends,” said Lori Watsen. “But the State of Idaho treats us as if our legal marriage never happened. We are two dedicated, loving parents who have made work and other life changes to be able to provide our son a loving, safe home, but Idaho does not recognize me as his legal parent, so I have no official status in his life. We have been forced to go through special legal steps and incur costs to protect our family as much as possible, but those measures cannot replace all of the protections that are given to married couples.”
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New York, NY – GLAAD has just appointed its first transgender cochair to its National Board of Directors. The LGBT organization announced its choice of Jennifer Finney Boylan, a transgender advocate and author of She’s Not There: A Life in Two Genders, her autobiography. The book was also the first by a transgender American to become a best seller. “GLAAD’s commitment to the trans community is real and unwavering,” said Boylan in a statement. “As transgender people continue to advocate for basic legal protections and recognition, the work that the staff of GLAD is leading to proactively share stories of transgender people through the media is a
game changer.” Leading members of GLAAD – including acting president Dave Montez – say that Boylan will help take the organization to the next level when with LGBT rights, particularly with transgender issues. “The transgender community continues to face alarming rates of violence and inequality while transgender people and issues remain relatively invisible in our national dialogue,” said Montez. “Jenny’s proven leadership will be instrumental as GLAAD continues to grow mainstream media attention and public understanding around transgender issues.”
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COURTESY OF INTERNATIONAL OLYMPIC COMMITTEE
Washington, D.C. – Twelve senators recently came together to send a letter to Thomas Bach, president of the International Olympic Committee, questioning the safety of LGBT individuals and supporters. “We write to express our deep concern about the IOC’s recent declaration that ‘as long as the Olympic Charter is upheld, we are fully satisfied,’” the letter read. “We disagree with this position and strongly urge you to reconsider given that the Russian law banning ‘homosexual propaganda’ is clearly inconsistent with the Olympic Charter. According to the Olympic Charter, ‘any form of discrimination with regard to a country or a person on grounds of race, religion, politics, gender or otherwise is incompatible with belonging to the Olympic Movement.’ Discrimination based on an individual’s sexual orientation is inconsistent with the Charter, and clearly contrary to the spirit of the Olympics.” The letter goes on to ask the IOC to assure that LGBT athletes and spectators will be protected during the Sochi games. “Therefore, we respectfully request more detailed information about the IOC’s preparations for the Winter Olympics and Paralympic Games in Sochi, including how the IOC will work to ensure the Olympic Charter is upheld for athletes and spectators alike.” The group of senators ask the IOC three crucial questions: “Have you received official confirmation from the Russian Federation regarding how the laws will be enforced – if at all – during the Winter Olympic and Paralympic Games? Will spectators and participants enjoy protection from prosecution under the discriminatory laws if they leave the Olympic village host city, including travel to or from the Winter Olympic and Paralympic Games in Sochi? What concrete assurances will visitors and athletes have that local law enforcement outside of Sochi will not be permitted to enforce the anti-LGBT
Thomas,” said Trump. “Now, of course, the United States is ahead of Russia when it comes to this stuff.” Trump said that he was surprised by how much backlash the Miss Universe competition received once it announced that this year’s event would take place in Russia. “We didn’t know this was such a controversy,” said Trump. “Perhaps we should have known, but we didn’t.” Trump said the venue for next year’s Miss Universe pageant will most likely be in China.
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Senators Ask the IOC to Protect LGBTs During Olympics
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Pier Sixty-Six
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Hyatt Regency
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at the
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Equality Florida 11.17.2013 Broward Gala 2301 SE 17th St, Fort Lauderdale Sunday, November 17, 5:30-8pm
Please join us for this wonderful event that includes drinks, delicious hors d’oeuvres, and an exciting program including a State of the State Address by our Chief Executive Officer, Nadine Smith. We will be our 2013 Voice for Equality Award Honorees.
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tickets are $150 and can be purchased at www.eqfl.org/browardgala or (813) 870-3735
Sponsorship opportunities begin at $500. Please contact Row at row@eqfl.org or 305-335-2102 for details. 100% of the proceeds will directly benefit Equality Florida’s important work.
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Law Offices of Gregory W. Kabel
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LIVE AT THE BB&T CENTER JANUARY 17, 2014
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TICKETS AVAILABLE AT ALL TICKETMASTER OUTLETS 800-745-3000 • TICKETMASTER.COM
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COVER STORY
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MARCO RUBIO TO HEADLINE ANTI-GAY FUNDRAISER
THE SENATOR HAS A ROCKY PAST WITH THE GAY COMMUNITY. At the Conservative Political Action Conference in March, Rubio defended his perceived bigotry.
BY GRANT JAMES
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“Just because I believe that states should have the right to define marriage in the traditional way does not make me a bigot,” said Rubio. In June, the senator threatened on the Andrea Tantaros Show to abandon his own bill on comprehensive immigration reform “if this bill has something in it that gives gay couples immigration rights and so fourth.” He went on to say “it kills the bill. At the Values Voter Summit last month, Rubio talked up the American dream: “I’ve also been lectured, as many of you have, that we need to stop talking about social issues if we want to win elections, but if we’re serious about saving the American dream, we can’t stop talking about these issues.”
nonsense,” Stemberger recently said to radio host Janet Mefferd. In the same interview, he said that affirming the identifies of gay youths is “tantamount to abuse” and “absolutely nonsense.” Rubio, a possible GOP presidential candidate for 2016, will deliver the keynote address at the fundraiser.
Rubio also recently blocked Judge William Thomas’ nomination to the Federal District Court for the Southern District of Florida, effectively stopping him from becoming the first openly gay black judge.
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ashington, D.C. – The Florida Family Policy Council announced that it will host Sen. Marco Rubio (R-FL) at its 2013 Annual Dinner benefit, according to Right Wing Watch. The fundraising dinner will honor Liberty Counsel head Mat Staver. Liberty Counsel once claimed that liberals are using LGBT rights to “ultimately implode America,” and that the “agenda of the homosexual movement” is to destroy western civilization and freedom as a whole. Staver has urged schools to stop honoring Day of Silence, an anti-bullying program, as well as to cease teaching LGBT history in schools because it is essentially “sexual assault.” He also claimed that the Employment Non-Discrimination Act could eventually lead to child molestation, sexual assault, and death. Most recently, his group filed a lawsuit against Gov. Chris Christie, alleging that New Jersey’s ban on gay conversion therapy prevented a couple from treating their son properly. John Stemberger, the president of FFPC, is known as an anti-gay activist as well. “We’re not going to tolerate somebody who’s, you know, here and queer, loud and proud, all of that
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The Week 11/14 to 11/20 BY PATRICK ROBERT
THE WEEK
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Island City Artwalk, Miami Beach Jazz Festival and Female Trouble
Art Walk: Male nudes by Maciel Cantelmo and others at Gallery XO November 15th, on Wilton Drive, Wilton Manors
THURSDAY 11/14
FRIDAY 11/15
Nudes on Show
12th Annual Miami Short Film Festival: Between the Lines
Debra Voigt, Soprano
Is there anything more sexually enticing than the idea of art fused with nudity? Nothing triggers an intense guttural feeling of desire than the classic moment in a young painter’s life when the model disrobes. Even Rose in Titanic fell under the spell of the artist’s male gaze, and for this month’s Art Walk on Wilton Drive, nudes will abound. The collection by local artists includes pastels, charcoal drawings, and some quality prints. The art will be in front of the Tracy Carroll Salon on the corner of NE 8th Avenue from 7-11. The pieces promise to be reasonably priced, so if you’re in the mood to have a well-etched dong as your living room centerpiece, bring your checkbook. 7 p.m. Wilton Drive Art Walk. Wilton Dr, Wilton Manors, 33305.
The week-long Miami Short Film Festival spends an evening regarding our wonderful culture. The collection Between the Lines explores the various hurdles facing the LGBTQ community. In “Kissing Drew” a bullied eighth grader tries to regain his dignity from a sex-obsessed “cool kid” who he privately desires. “Natives” finds a lesbian couple traversing the Native American heritage of one of the partners. In “Sabbatical” Phillip and Sam decide to separate and then get back together. Those and three other 20-minute shorts make up this LGBTQ specific night of the festival. 8:30 p.m. Paragon Grove 13. 3015 Grand Ave, Coconut Grove, 33133.
This diva of the operatic world has been impressing audiences for almost two decades as an acclaimed soprano. Unlike most fat operatic singers, Voigt took a risky gamble back in the early 2000s when she decided to lose weight and underwent gastric bypass surgery. The Royal Opera House had fired her for not fitting into the show’s costume—a “little black dress”. After the successful surgery, she was rehired for the role of Ariadne. An outraged public welcomed her back with open arms. Her popular career allows her to currently tour, singing both opera and pop music. The 90-minute show is sure to dazzle any fan of vocal talent. 8 p.m. Adrienne Arsht Center. 300 Biscayne Blvd, Miami, 33132.
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Female Trouble
Miami Beach Jazz Festival
TUESDAY 11/19
Third Eye Blind A long time ago, Third Eye Blind ruled the top 40 radio airplay with songs about how life would suck after a relationship and their “semi-charmed” life. Even if they haven’t had a hit in over a decade, these alt-rockers can still deliver the kind of soft rock vocals that earned them a legion of fans and heavy airplay back in the latter
days of the past millennium. Despite this Bay area band having fell of the charts, they’ve returned with releases like “Out of the Vein” and “Ursa Major.” 7 p.m. Revolution Live. 100 SW 3rd Ave, Fort Lauderdale, 33312.
WEDNESDAY 11/20
Fear Up Harsh “Enhanced interrogation” techniques is one of the great euphemisms for torture. Fear Up Harsh is the phrase the military uses to designate such an activity, and this new drama explores what happens to a Medal of Honor winner when his past, that’s anything but honorable, starts creeping toward the surface. When a former comrade-in-arms shows up, the Iraq War veteran’s perfect life begins to fall apart in this play, which received critical praise during its recent work-inprogress presentation at The Arsht Center’s 2013 Miami Made Festival. 7:30 p.m. Adrienne Arsht Center. 1300 Biscayne Blvd, Miami, 33132.
Stars and Guitars A long time ago, all Sheryl Crow wanted to do was have some fun. And then, she met Lance Armstrong, and basically her life was
Female Trouble (11/16)
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SUNDAY 11/17
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Miami Book Fair: A Night with Erica Jong
troduced as a special edition with a new intro written by self-proclaimed feminist Jennifer Weiner, author of Good in Bed and In Her Shoes (which later became a very good movie starring Cameron Diaz). Tonight Erica Jong talks about gender, sexuality, liberty, and, of course, her book. Jennifer Weiner joins her on this second day of the Miami Book Fair, which will have various events throughout the next two weeks. 8 p.m. Chapman Conference Center. 245 NE 4th St, Miami, 33132.
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ruined. A new book claims she even informed on his drug use, something she openly watched him doing on private jet flights—certainly, hell The month long retrospective of has no fury…Be that as it may, Crow the world’s most beloved b-movie headlines the Stars and Guitars queen, Divine, reaches its pinconcert, having successfully crossed nacle with O Cinema’s showing of over into the country music world her most indelible performance with her new album Feels Like in John Water’s Female Trouble. Home. Fellow country crossover With a new documentary (which Darius Rucker, formerly of Hootie played at the Fort Lauderdale Gay and the Blowfish, performs alongand Lesbian Film Festival) entitled side her for a night of love songs I Am Divine opening on Novemand drunken bar fights. Also apber 29th, O Cinema has decided to pearing are Love & Theft and Craig celebrate the highlights of Divine’s Campbell. 7 p.m. Hard Rock Live. 1 successful and notorious career. Seminole Way, Hollywood, 33314. Female Trouble tells the depraved life story of obese criminal Dawn Davenport, from go-go dancing in Baltimore’s infamous Block to MONDAY 11/18 death by electric chair. Highlights include Dawn mainlining liquid eyeliner and an obsessive neighbor named Ida, grooming her Erica Jong’s groundbreaking first nephew to be gay. The film plays at 11:00 p.m. O Cinema Wynwood. novel Fear of Flying not only became a feminist staple but also 90 NW 29th St, Miami, 33127. introduced the phrase “Zipless F&^$” into the public lexicon. On the 40th anniversary of its pubWorld class jazz musicians take lication, the book has been reincenter stage at the Miami Beach Jazz Festival. Event founder and producer, Carmen J. Cartiligia, envisions the festival to be purely jazz, going back to the basics and focusing on only exceptional true jazz artists. “We’re going ‘old school’ for this event,” she explains, as artists from Brazil face their US counterparts. Featured artists include Michelle Coltrane, Markus Gottschlich, Mads Tolling, and The South Florida Jazz Orchestra. Miami has always been a jazz haven, with this event a highlight of the year. 5 p.m. Fillmore Miami Beach. 1700 Washington Ave, Miami Beach, 33139.
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SATURDAY 11/16
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ASK THE FITNESS MAN WORKOUT TIP
By PETER JACKSON, CPT HOW TO BUILD STRONG SHOULDERS
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Q: I’ve been working out for six months and have seen a big improvement in my chest and arms, but my shoulders are still narrow and puny. What can I do? A: Big, broad shoulders complement your arms, chest and back and punctuate a welldeveloped upper body. Two reasons why strengthening the shoulder muscles is so important: 1) It’s the best defense we have to preventing painful, often debilitating injuries to the shoulder joint including dislocation or, worse, a torn rotator cuff; and 2) The shoulder muscles assist in most exercises for your chest, back and arms; consequently weak shoulders mean those muscle groups won’t reach their full potential. The deltoid (musculus deltoideus) plays a critical role in building strong shoulder muscles. This is the large triangular muscle covering the shoulder joint which allows movement, extension and rotation of the arm. It’s made up of three sections – the front, middle and rear deltoid. Also critical to improving your shoulder strength is working the upper traps (trapezius), located between the neck and shoulders. In my opinion the Shoulder Press is the best exercise to develop the front and middle delts as well as the traps.
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If you turn your palms in (facing each other), rather than out when performing a Seated Dumbbell Shoulder Press, you will increase the demand on your anterior deltoids and triceps and improve your overall pushing strength. Avoid this exercise, however, if you are experiencing any shoulder pain! My recommendation is to restrict overhead pressing exercises such as the Shoulder Press to just one or two per workout and instead utilize Cable or Dumbbell Flyes, Lateral Raises, Shrugs and other exercises to avoid putting too much stress on the shoulder joints. Here are two of my favorite exercises to help build big, strong shoulders. Ask a personal trainer at your gym or training facility to recommend others. SIDE-LYING LATERAL RAISE: Lie on your left side on an incline bench with a dumbbell in your right hand and your palm facing your thigh. Without bending your elbow, raise your arm until it’s in line with your shoulder as your rotate your palm outward. CUBAN PRESS: Hold a pair of dumbbells at right angles above your shoulders, palms facing forward. Rotate your arms down so that your palms face the floor. Return to the starting position and lift your arms above your head. Repeat from the beginning. The owner of Push Fitness and Club One CrossFit in Oakland Park, Peter Jackson is a fitness and nutrition coach known for his cutting-edge fitness and fat-loss programs for individuals, couples and small groups. Peter welcomes your questions at Peter@PushFitnessFTL.com or visit him online at www. PushFitnessFTL.com and www.ClubOneCrossFit.com.
SPOTLIGHT EXERCISE: SWISS-BALL PREACHER CURL Push Fitness client Ray Chenoweth demonstrates the Swiss-Ball Preacher Curl. Photo: TobysPhotos.com
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Kneel over a Swiss ball and rest your upper arms on it, holding the curling bar with an underhand grip. Your elbows should be slightly bent. Without moving your upper arms off the ball, curl the weight toward your shoulders. Return to starting position. Repeat 12 times. Do three sets.
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SHORTBREAD 123
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RECIPE BY CHEF JEAN DOHERTY
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• 1 cup brown sugar • 2 cups salted butter • 3 and more cups all-purpose flour
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hortbread is a classic Scottish dessert that consists of three basic ingredients: flour, sugar, and butter. This dessert resulted from medieval biscuit bread, which was a twice-baked, enriched bread roll dusted with sugar and spices and hardened into a hard, dry, sweetened biscuit called a Rusk. Eventually, yeast from the original Rusk recipe was replaced by butter, which was becoming more of a staple in the British Isles. Despite the fact that shortbread was prepared during much of the 12th century, the refinement of shortbread was actually accredited to Mary, Queen of Scots in the 16th century. The name of one of the most traditional forms of shortbread is “petticoat tails;” this type of shortbread was baked in a round tin and then cut into triangular wedges.
Preheat oven to 325 degrees F. Cream the butter and brown sugar. Add 3 cups of flour. Mix well. You can do this in a mixer if you like. Sprinkle board with more flour. Knead for a few minutes, adding enough flour to make soft dough. Roll to a 1/4 inch thickness. Cut into strips and place on ungreased baking sheets or plop into a pan and press flat, you are the chef. Prick with fork any which way you do it. Bake at 325 degrees for 20 to 25 minutes.
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SEXCAPADES
SEX HAPPENS: AN INTERVIEW WITH DR. LEIGHT
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BY GRANT JAMES
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efore I met with Dr. Arlen Leight, I didn’t know much about sexologists. I’ve read some advice columns from sexologists, but that was as far as I got. The dentistturned-sexologist known as Dr. Leight has just released a book for “any gay men at a crossroads in their relationships,” titled Sex Happens. Dr. Leight sat down with me to discuss his book, sexual roles and why a sexologist can save your relationship. How is it different working with a gay couple as opposed to a straight couple? Not so many years ago, I was in Miami at an art opening and there was a psychologist there who practiced in Miami. We started talking and she said ‘there’s really no difference between a straight couple and a gay couple is there?’ It took everything in me to sort of keep calm and say ‘it’s a completely different animal.’ It’s different because there are very unique challenges in gay coupling that are not present at all in gay coupling. The maturation of two gay people can be very different. Someone who has been out for a long time, could be 25 years old, and someone who has been out a short time could be 55 years old. It’s called ‘age independent maturation,’ and that’s one of the points I touch on in the book.
Arlen Leight
account in the couple’s counseling and by the couple themselves. You don’t really know how it’s going to affect the couple, but you have to look at it. Another big difference between straight and gay couples is sexual compatibility. With man and woman, it’s a given. With gay couples, it’s different. A top isn’t somebody who tops a lot, it’s somebody who is psychologically hardwired to top. The same goes for bottom and versatile. A bottom is someone who naturally desires surrender, and a top is someone who naturally desires to care for their partner.
who bottoms and tops. Someone who is truly versatile is someone who is hardwired to bottom and top, and isn’t satisfied from doing just one.
Open relationships... healthy or unhealthy? Men are naturally going to have sex. We’re very sexual. Sometimes the desire for sex goes outside of the relationship. People say that being open destroys relationships. That’s both true and not true. It only destroys the relationship if you’re not open with each other. During my practice, I’ve found that by the time they’re finished talking to me about what they’ve I’m curious. Do you been hiding, they’re both believe that versatility is sort more interested in each other. of a fake stepping stone, like They’re afraid to talk about it. some people claim bisexualDr. Leight’s book Sex ity to be? Happens is available now. That’s interesting that you Visit marriagecounselingforDo work on getting them make that analogy because I on the same page in terms of actually make that analogy in men.org/sexhappens for more information. maturation? the book [laughs]. Someone It just has to be taken into who is versatile isn’t someone
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For more information, go to stowemountainlodge.com. There’s a 20% discount if you book by Nov. 22. The Inn at The Round Barn in Waitsfield, Vermont offers a Country Christmas Package from December 15 -26, which includes a room for any four nights during that period (including gourmet breakfast daily), afternoon cookies and hors d’oeuvres by the Inn’s fireplace, a gingerbread making class, a sleigh ride for two and $25 shopping coupons each for participating shops of Waitsfield are included. Prices range from $850-1,400. For more information, go to theroundbarn.com. The Essex Resort offers a holiday spa weekend, Dec. 6-8, which includes two night’s accommodations, a welcome reception, $300 credit towards spa services, a “Holiday Hors D’oeuvres & Desserts” class at the Cook Academy, shopping discounts and complimentary shuttle to Burlington’s Church Street Marketplace for holiday shopping. Packages start at $550 per person, double occupancy. For more information call 800-747-4295 or check out essexresortspa.com. While you’re in Vermont, take some time to check out The Ben & Jerry’s Ice Cream factory in Waterbury. A 30-minute guided tour includes a company history movie, explanation/ view of manufacturing area and ice cream sampling. It’s only $4 for the tour, but you must book ahead. Call 866-BJTOURS (love the phone number!) For more information on GLBT tourism in Vermont, go to vermontgaytourism.com.
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end winds up with a farewell brunch at Wally’s Amerihile all the can Grill, on Sunday, March northerners 2. For more information, go are headto killington.com/winter/ ing down groups/ski_groups_planner/ to sunny Florida and cloggroup_events ging our streets with extra While not an official part of traffic, why not take advanthe weekend’s schedule, when tage of some great winter in town, you’ll want to make vacation deals? It’s not too it a point to check out the early to start planning your Ledgewood Yurt. Seating just winter getaway and Vermont, 30 people and only accessible with its progressive attitudes by sleigh, this intimate mountowards equal rights for all tainside dining experience is people, is a great place to visit. incredible. Book early as it’s In 2000, it became the first certain to sell out during the state to provide civil unions, busy Winter Pride weekend. legally recognizing committed Call 1-866-809-9147. same-sex couples. In 2009, it The Snowed Inn, in Killingbecame the first state to pass ton, offers two nights lodga gay marriage law by legisla- ing and two days ski packages tion rather than court order. starting at $248.00 per person It’s a place offering a warm during weekdays, $317.00 per winter welcome. person on weekends. Stay at Killington, Vermont is Snowed Inn, and they’ll book hosting its second GLBT spa treatments for you at the Pride celebration, “KillingSpa at the Woods with a 10% ton Winter Pride”, featurdiscount. Call 800-311-5406 ing on and off snow events or go to snowedinn.com and gatherings. A Winter Stowe, Vermont offers Pride Package is available for the ultimate package for ski Feb. 28-March 3, 2014 and lovers, which includes; luxury includes lodging, lift tickslope side accommodations ets, learn to ski or ride packand one lift ticket per adult ages and access to all the and lodging at Stowe Mounpride events and activities. tain Lodge, which offers runs The celebration begins with a for all skill levels. If skiing isn’t VIP cocktail party, followed your style, you may want to by dinner featuring a variety check out the lodge’s “Stoweof surf and turf specialties, a mance Romance” package. soup and salad bar, and hors Toast to the start of a relaxd’oeuvres. Later that night ing weekend with a bottle of the” White OUT” dance, one bubbly in your room, and of the hottest Pride weekmelt away the stress from your end parties, takes place at The week with a couples massage Killington Resort. The Pride and soak in a duet room and Slide downhill parade and private tub. They even include costume contest on Satura $100 dining credit so you day is followed by an aprèscan indulge in a dinner for ski happy hour at the Long two in Solstice restaurant. Trail Pub in the Snowshed The package includes a room Lodge. Later that night, for two nights for people, a it’s the “Wham Bam Rainbottle of Vermont Ice Wine bow Jam” dance. The weekand two 50-minute massages. BY RICK KARLIN
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EMPLOYMENT GENESIS HEALTH INSTITUTE, the premier Anti-Aging health facility located in Wilton Manors is growing... we are seeking team members for the following positions; Front Desk Receptionist, Acupuncturist, Aesthetician, Nutritionist, Medical Assistant. We are a health and hospitality oriented team of professionals, if you are as well and are interested in any of the positions, please email your resume to dimitrighi1@aol.com for an interview request. THE FLORIDA AGENDA IS LOOKING FOR AN INTERN. Ideal for an aspiring journalist or recent graduate. Join our team and get experience proofreading, editing, doing research on a part-time basis– and, best of all, the opportunity to get your work in print. Contact: grantjames@mmplgbt.com WILTON MANORS FIRM LOOKING FOR AN EXPERIENCED TAX PREPARER. The right person would have several years of business and personal tax preparation experience. Part Time Temporary that may become full time permanent for the right person. $12-$15 an hour based on experience. Send resume with cover letter to info@sterlingaccounting.com JAVA BOYS IS LOOKING FOR A BARISTA. Please apply in person, Shoppes of Wilton Manors. PART TIME BARTENDER AND NIGHT SECURITY POSITION AVAILABLE. Bartender should have a following... Call Jerry (954)786-0287. 5 POINTS MASSAGE, Your Relaxation Oasis in Wilton Manors is looking for 2-3 exceptionally talented Licensed Massage Therapists to work as contract workers, part time on an appointment by appointment basis. Thai massage, Reflexology, and other specialty techniques especially considered. Men and women considered. Must be licensed in the State of Florida and carry state-required personal liability insurance. Studio opens in early June. Call Tom Marten at 954-2957041 or e-mail at tom@5pointsmassage.com for further info. Be part of Wilton Manors premiere massage studio.
FURNISHED HOUSING 4 WEEK+ SPECIAL FROM $325/WEEK THROUGH END OF NOVEMBER Gay Owned & Operated Apartment Hotel. Beautiful Studio,1 & 2 BR Apts. With Full Kitchens. Turn-key, fully furnished &equipped, clothing optional pool, laundry, parking. Central to Wilton Manors & Haulover Beach. Incl. Wi-Fi, utilities, cable, tel. Pets Welcome. Call Joe or Jack at (954) 927-0090 or visit www.LibertySuites.com
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Health Insurance Exchange Now Active With Subsidies Available I will BEAT your current rate with same or better coverage 9 out of 10 times!
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