Just for Her Issue 16

JustHer

ISSUE 16

for

Directory for the Wives, Girlfriends and Families of Military Personnel

FIFTY SHADES

CALENDAR GIRLS

OF FASTING

International Women’s Day

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Mother’s Day

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F irst the re wa s ca mp ing, the n gla mp ing an d now the re’s cha mp ing!

10 Things We Took For Granted....

NATIONAL

WALES MILITARY CATCHMENT

My mother-in-law gave me a pair of slippers every Christmas, even when she was over 100!! Christmas was no problem for her everyone got the same thing as last year and the year before….easy!! However, for those of us who want to choose a present that is thoughtful and welcome, and which shows you have gone to a little trouble, it gets a bit more tricky around this time of year.

Add to that if you have to give a present to a Baby or Toddler which pleases them, pleases the parents and reflects the fact you have taken trouble to get something which shows you care, it can be a real Christmas-time-challenge.

Here at Curious Fox Company we specialise in Treasure Baskets and Gifts (including stocking fillers) for little ones. We make up the baskets individually and we have a wide range to suit all tastes, including beautifully prepared Christmas themed ones. Based on educational research into early play, they are all collections of natural and everyday items, safe to play with and fascinating for early learners as they find out more about their world ….naturally. For an extra special ‘wow’ factor, a red/ green or cream /gold liner can turn it into a beautiful and unique gift for a First Christmas.

A Treasure Basket ticks all the boxes. Hand made, attractive, seasonal, shows that you have gone the extra mile to find something special for a special baby and above all, the baby will love it. Each basket has some guidance for the adult and has some advice on adding to it as the baby gets older.

So, whether you are a mum or a grannie, whether you have a niece, nephew or simply need a present for a friend’s baby, we think Curious Fox has the answer to your ideal baby gift!

Mary Horn Curious Fox Company www.curiousfoxcompany.co.uk Tel: 01905 756701 Email: info@curiousfoxcompany.co.uk

NORTHERN IRELAND MILITARY CATCHMENT

Gif t time for Babies

JustHer for

Why NOT to Make New Years Resolutions

6

Calendar Girls

8

Walking with the Wounded

14

Alcohol and Me

16

Decluttering

20

Fifty Shades of Fasting

22

Shop The Highstreet

26

Military and Me

36

We hope you all had a wonderful Christmas and wish you a Happy New Year!

The Marine Wife and Mum

38

How many of you have already broken your New Year’s resolutions?! Don’t fret, we discuss Why NOT to make New Year’s resolutions in this issue so you can stop beating yourself up about it! We also talk to some dry January participants in Alcohol and Me and look at how cutting down can make a big difference to your overall wellbeing. It’s at this time of year that we start to consider Decluttering and we have a great article on how to declutter, not just your home, but your mind and body too!

10 Things We Took For Granted

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Just a Thought…

42

Grow Your Own - An Allotment Year

46

Mother’s Day Roasts

50

Decoupage Candles

55

Fashion Lookbook

58

International Women’s Day

68

Paranormal Corner

74

A to Z of The Great British Bucket List

78

Champing

84

Cities A to Z - Madrid

86

Welcome to issue 16 of Just for Her…

If you are planning on getting out in the garden this year, then make sure you read our Grow Your Own feature for a month by month guide on what to do when.

We have some brilliant contributions in this issue and are, as always, extremely grateful that you want to get involved. First we hear from The Marine Wife and Mum whose honest blog is sure to resonate with many military wives and partners. Gemma Richardson is back with Calendar Girls and we look at the issue of loneliness in Just a Thought. This issue sees the launch of a new feature, Paranormal Corner, in which our resident ghostbuster John Colenutt offers advice to anyone experiencing anything a little out of the ordinary!

Thank you again for all of your support during 2017. Here’s to the next year!

For anyone who would like to contribute to the next issue the closing date for contributions is 22nd February.

Until next time...

Many thanks to Kate Saines and Rebecca Smith for their editorial contribution

Enjoy!

Articles and photographs reproduced by kind permission of the contributors © No responsibility for the quality of goods or services advertised in this magazine can be accepted by the publishers or printers. Advertisements are included in good faith. The MOD or any Service Establishment is not responsible for the advertiser or its advertised product or service.

Forces & Corporate Publishing Ltd, Hamblin House, Hamblin Court, Rushden, Northants NN10 0RU. Tel: 01933 419994 www.forcespublishing.co.uk justforher@forcespublishing.co.uk @justforhermag Editorial: Joanna Barnes Design: Amy Leverton

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The light and spacious studio is a place to leave your troubles at the door and have some fun. Offering cra supplies, and both Mixed Media and Papercra workshops and retreats, there is something for everyone here and all abili es are welcome. In addi on to Helen teaching various cra s herself, interna onal and UK based guest ar sts are also invited to teach and inspire.

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Have a look at the website for upcoming events, product for sale, and other exci ng informa on: www.handmadeathelens.co.uk

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09/01/2018 14:07

Why NOT to Make New Year’s Resolutions…

The New Year is upon us, which means it’s time to make a resolution or two, or three, right?! So what will it be this year? Lose weight, again; promise yourself a change of job, again; earn more money, perhaps?

This year, throw the rulebook out the window and let us propose something a little different…

Don’t make any resolutions. Not one. No promises to lose 10lbs or that this year you really are going to get up at 5am every morning for a run. No telling yourself that by autumn you will have saved up £1000 towards an all-inclusive holiday. Ask yourself how many of your previous resolutions you’ve actually ever actually kept. None?

One? Maybe two? Out of how many? How disheartening was it when you didn’t achieve what you’d set out to do?

This year, go into 2018 with no pressure on your back. Just a positive attitude of how great this year is going to be and be completely open to any new possibilities and opportunities that may come your way.

In truth there is no point giving yourself the same old resolutions that you’ve been setting for years, only to feel down on yourself if they don’t come to fruition once again. Instead, heading into the New Year free of pressure and with a positive mental attitude means you will be far more likely to have a successful year and be ready to make changes at some point during it, whereas repeating the same cycles that have failed you before will only perpetuate feelings of inadequacy and failure which won’t be conductive to reaching any goals at all.

A whopping 25% of people who make New Year’s resolutions give up within the first week. We put so much pressure on ourselves in

the New Year to make it a good one, but the truth is that it’s not always a good time to incite change, and New Year’s resolutions are normally quite big changes. The moment you put a year-long stamp on it you’re doomed. If you have goals that you would like to reach, you can set them at any time in the year, for however long you like, at a time that is right for you. We aren’t saying that you shouldn’t strive to better yourself but you shouldn’t force your goals when the time isn’t right.You could be feeling mentally, spiritually and physically committed to achieving them at any point in the next year, and that will be the best time set goals and improve. It doesn’t matter how many goal-setting guides you follow, the moment you stop heaping pressure on yourself to carry out promises that you aren’t 110% committed to, or don’t even really want in the first place, is the moment you give yourself a chance to breath and to really see the wood for the trees.

To succeed in changing your lifestyle, behaviour or habits you need to be motivated. Maybe your past resolutions have been influenced more by people and things around you rather than actually coming from within you and what you really want.

A magazine tells you you need to be fit by summer, your friends have all resolved to join the gym together and go 4 times a week.You think you should join too, but deep down you know you’ll have quit before the month is up. Decision fatigue is a phenomenon that correlates with ego depletion. Basically, as time goes on you start to lose your motivation in a decision. Most people experience this with New Year’s resolutions as they only make them because it’s New Year and they feel they have to, not because they are truly motivated by themselves to change. Our mental energy in sticking to these often rather challenging decisions is finite and sooner or later we will lose steam and start to look for ways around them. Decision fatigue kicks in and before you know it, your brand new running shoes

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have collected an inch of dust sat by the door and you’ve cancelled your direct debit to the gym.

Wouldn’t it be great if this year, you start off with zero pressure.

Zero expectations from yourself, or from others. Some resolutions have a tendency to make us think that we need more than we already have. They create a gap between where we are now and where we think we should be. They make us think that more things, more time, more work-life balance, more money will make us happier... really the very nature of having goals can hurt your self-confidence and self-esteem. Maybe this is the year that you can be happy with your lot. Take stock of what you do have and be content with it. We have had it pushed down our throats for years, throughout our school lives and through adulthood that we must always strive for more. When does it stop? Why is it not acceptable to just sit back and enjoy what we do have for the moment, even if not forever, because maybe we are just happy with where we are right now?

And if you’ve already made your resolutions for the year and are already feeling sad and depleted at the thought of another 5am run, or at another limp salad for lunch, don’t worry. Go buy yourself a sandwich and a hot chocolate (add the whipped cream – you know you want to), reset your alarm for the far more reasonable hour of 7:30 and chuck your running shoes in the bottom of the wardrobe.You’ve got another 364 equally great decision-making days ahead of you this year. Living life to the fullest isn’t about making some half-hearted promises to yourself that don’t really mean anything, it’s about making confident choices about things that really matter to you, and then jumping in with both feet when the time is right.

Although no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.

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CONTRIBUTION

CALENDAR GIRLS

A good beginning makes a good end…

By Gemma Richardson

I

, and a significant number of the species, tend to get angsty around New Year. It is a time of both reflection and looking forward, a time of starting afresh and wondering what the year ahead will bring; another year over, a new one just begun. It is no surprise then that making New Year’s resolutions is commonplace, and surprise, surprise the largest percentage of which is taken up by the desire to lose weight and eat healthier. I, despite my lofty ideals of how women shouldn’t be pressured by the (Photoshopped) images of so-called body perfection plastered across the media, am no different. I have, in the past, seen New Year, after the indulgences of Christmas (which for me normally consist of cheese and wine) as a good starting point to gear up towards the, dun dun dunnnnnn... summer body. The amount of time I have spent worrying about that ‘summer body’ is ridiculous; if thought alone could imbue life, Frankenstein-style, my summer body would be walking around in a bikini of its own accord by now. How ironic then, that stripping off, warts and all (with what I can only describe in oppositional terms as my winter, i.e. normal body) could free me from the shackles of self inflicted insecurity and feelings of body-inadequacy.

I saw the post looking for ‘models’ for the BFG wives calendar at the very beginning of summer, when the days are just starting to lose their crispy air and daylight comes easier. At first I just wanted to write about the women taking part and their journey of doing so. I was, however, convinced to join them and experience the adventure first hand, admittedly it did help that all money raised was going to Combat Stress. Stripping off is not something I am naturally comfortable with, not even with my beloved husband who tells me I am beautiful at least once a day. I do not think of myself as sexy, or particularly calendar worthy, but I soon learned that no-one really does. We’ve all done it – looked at a beautiful woman walking down the street, wishing we had her hair, skin, legs or waistline, thinking how much better our lives would be, how much happier, if we could only drop that stone or two. Meeting the other eleven women taking part, seeing how gorgeous they all were, in their own way, and yet hearing their body worries; of back fat, stretch marked tummies,

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rounded calves, spots, or even (thanks Kim Kardashian) lack of a bum, made me realise how skewed our own perspectives of ourselves can be. These women, all strangers to me and to each other, could see the beauty in each other, admiring and complimenting along the way, even when we couldn’t see it in ourselves, and what could be more beautiful than that?

We live in a world where women can be incredibly critical and judgemental of each other, sometimes especially so in the military sphere; nothing strikes fear quite like trying to find a dress for mess balls that won’t be one of a twin, one that’s below the knee; not ‘too slutty’ yet a little sexy, doesn’t make you look like a cling-filmed sausage or won’t merit the dreaded “what is she wearing?” whispers. My fellow calendar girls were incredibly kind, and all incredibly nervous as we met on a chilly September

morning, slightly shy of each other, slyly slipping off t-shirts and trousers in the NATO Officers mess bathroom, eyes wide with fear, wondering what on earth we’d got ourselves into, garnering opinions on the prescribed black underwear we were required to wear. With some trepidation and a lot of encouragement Cassie and I were the first models being photographed, and so bundled in husband’s army jackets, high heels and way too much makeup for half eight in the morning we headed to the assault course. It would be remiss of me not to say that being a model is not glamorous; trying to seductively hump a brick wall isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. In normal social circles caressing a strangers bum would be considered rude, here however trying to imitate giving Cassie a helping hand (i.e. two - one for each bum cheek) over the wall was certainly an icebreaker.

One by one every one of us ventured out across the army barracks here in Germany, handling shotguns, straddling Commander’s desks and fire hoses, “fixing” tanks with duct tape and WD40 (that’s all it takes right?) and riding bareback Lady Godiva style on one of the regimental horses.

Throughout our many breaks and whilst waiting for the other ladies to return from their shoot location, drinking sugared

coffee and eating Pom Bears, we got to have a sneaky peek at the photos, huddling around the laptop in a campfire like circle, instead of singing Kumbaya, singing each others praises. Cries of “oh my god look how amazing your boobs look”, “wow, it actually looks like you’ve got an arse in that one”, or “you look so sexy girls” rang out through the officers mess. Without question every single woman in that room, women of different shapes and sizes could see the beauty in each other and despite our worries of what babies and pizza had wrought on our bodies, slowly the truth started to dawn. If I, we, could see the winsomeness in each other, despite our own self-doubt, then by-proxy, maybe, just maybe I, we, really were pretty alright looking (and the others definitely were) and even fairly darn sexy. continues over page >> 9

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some expected petty judging of doing an underwear shoot, it is with resolution I will face this New Year and its promises and wellmeaning resolutions.

SCOTLAND MILITARY CATCHMENT

The day culminated in standing outside our sponsor’s Grant and Green’s HQ, seemingly “naked” behind an incredibly large banner (bar straps slipped down).

Daunting though it was posing not two hundred metres from the Naafi Max, with cars and families whipping past, an elderly, cap wearing German gentleman literally doing a comedy-type double take and near enough falling off his bike, certainly eased the intimidation of perhaps seeing the kid’s teacher driving by. I arrived at the calendar shoot feeling nervous, self-conscious of my un-exercised, chicken-drumstick shaped thighs, and left that afternoon feeling empowered and emancipated from my own self-criticisms. And, so, despite

I will not wish or start this new year with thoughts of being slimmer or desirous of a less love- handled body. Instead I will retain the lessons that taking part in the BFG wives calendar taught me to appreciate my body, it is mine after all; it might bear the scars of having born babies, but it gave me babies, that no matter how much more attractive you think somebody else is,

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everybody has their insecurities, if we’re all walking around in our own little polluted cloud of self-doubt, what’s the point?. Isn’t it better to just embrace what you’ve got?

To drop the judgement and jealousy and embrace the fact that everybody is in the same boat, no matter how perfect they might seem? To start afresh, with a new self-forgiving attitude, strip off for your man (because he’s never gonna not love that!) and be just that little bit kinder to each other, but most importantly to yourself.

If you’d like to help us raise more money for combat stress, why not purchase one of our calendars from https://www. flamingoeventplanning.com/armedbuns-calendar/Armed-Buns-Calendar2018-p93718204

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Treat yourself or a loved one to a unique, hand painted lasting reminder of your special pet.

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Finding Your Balance Get back on track with Zero Balancing What is Zero Balancing (ZB)?

ZB is a gentle yet powerful hands-on method of balancing body energy with body structure. Using finger pressure and held stretches, it invites the release of tension accumulated deep within the body. ZB provides a point of stillness around which the body can relax, giving an opportunity to let go of unease and pain and experience a new level of wellbeing.

It promotes a deeper sense of physical and emotional harmony, allowing our own natural healing process to work more effectively. ZB benefits a wide range of people and has extensive applications in health and in personal development.

How did Zero Balancing originate?

Dr. Fritz Smith, an osteopath, physician and acupuncturist, developed the principles of Zero Balancing in 1975. He understood the importance of integrating mainstream Western scientific approaches to body structure with concepts of energy and healing used routinely in the East.

Zero Balancers* are also healthcare professionals in other fields. The ZBAUK organises the thorough training program that leads to accreditation as a Certified Zero Balancer.

The following are some of the areas in which Zero Balancing may be especially useful: Stress Reduction Zero Balancing is an effective and gentle way of dealing with accumulated stress in the body and in the mind. People feel relaxed, refreshed and invigorated after a session, more able to understand and deal with the causes of the stress.

Body Pain Pain usually occurs in those areas where energy flow is blocked or weakened, commonly in areas of tension or overuse and sometimes direct injury. Zero Balancing restores energy flow which can remove the causes of pain and improve body awareness. There is a corresponding increase in flexibility, range and performance.

Flexibility and Posture Zero Balancing evaluates and improves the function of the joints working towards optimum balance and efficiency in their relationship with each other and with the whole body. This encourages natural realignment and improved posture.

Reparative Touch Natural responses to touch can become distorted by events such as trauma, abuse or prolonged physical or emotional pain.

Zero Balancing establishes a clear interface between the therapist and the client in which the boundaries of touch and communication are distinct and non-intrusive. The safety of this respectful connection enables the client to reclaim their body and rediscover the positive aspects of human touch.

Personal Process ZB can facilitate the release of outdated mental habits and patterns of emotional responses. Unresolved issues from our personal history may be held in the body and act as obstacles to personal development.

ZB can help access and clear these obstructions, strengthening our ability to adapt to change and to reconnect with our essential selves- ‘back in balance’ General Wellbeing Zero Balancing generates an active and conscious

state of well-being. Pleasurable in itself, it can provide a foundation for continuing good health. If you feel good, Zero Balancing offers you the opportunity to feel even better.

People who receive Zero Balancing may also move into a new state of awareness from which old patterns and habits in the body and mind may be more readily released. This can manifest as noticeable changes in the way physical structure and movement are experienced or as a shift in inner awareness so that new opportunities and choices become apparent and a general sense of positivity prevails.

What Happens During A Zero Balancing Session?

Zero Balancing is hands-on bodywork where the client lies fully clothed on his or her back on the therapist’s couch. A short health history will be taken before the session starts. A session may take anywhere between 25 and 45 minutes.

It is recommended that a person has three sessions to begin with and then decide with their practitioner what frequency would serve them best.

Some people continue to have ZB regularly, while others find it beneficial at times when they need to be functioning at their best or at times of stress or transitional periods in their lives.

About Me My name is Diana West and I work as a certified Zero Balancer in my Pilates and holistic practice in Kingston upon Thames.

I have almost 25 years experience working in the health and fitness industry and have a particular interest in the mind and body connection and how we function and feel about ourselves in relationship to our personal life events and conditioning factors experienced I practice ZB as a therapy in itself to enable clients to be the best they can be physically, emotionally, mentally etc during particular life events or simply to enhance their experience of everyday life and promote their sense of wellbeing and inner calmness.

I also use ZB tools alongside my teaching of Pilates and movement or massage therapy to facilitate better body awareness or mindfulness during the client’s session.

For further details or to book a session contact: Diana West on Mob: 07973 640 544 email: diana.west@kingstonpilatesstudio.co.uk Website: www.kingstonpilatesstudio.co.uk 12

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The unique touch of Zero Balancing brings a clearer flow through the body, helping release held tension from both body and mind and induces deep relaxation and harmony.

Enhances: Pain reduction Recovery from injury Posture and flexibility Relaxation Emotional harmony Personal progression Wellbeing

DIANA WEST cert. ZB 07973 640544

Website: www.kingstonpilatesstudio.co.uk Email: diana.west@kingstonpilatesstudio.co.uk

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NEW YEAR

NEW YOU!

It’s that time of year once again; eat healthier, drink less, do more exercise… New Year’s resolutions are back and this year they’re healthier than ever! Not only is our physical health important, but we’ve also got to be ever mindful to look after our mental wellbeing, and getting outside is just one way to do that.

T

his is where we come in…

Walking With The Wounded has got an exciting year ahead; not only with our legendary Cumbrian Challenge, but we’re also returning to Balmoral Castle, where the Queen has given her kind permission once again for us to host the second Balmoral Challenge.

Our challenges offer routes for all abilities, as well as the chance to keep healthy, inside and out.

Get outside more ✓ Keep fit ✓ Do something new ✓ These resolutions appear to be looking after themselves…

Walking With The Wounded’s mission is to support all ex-servicemen and women with physical, mental or social injury in order that they get the qualifications necessary to

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develop new careers outside the military. This means that they’re able re-integrate into society and provide long term security for themselves and their families once again.

In order to provide this support, Walking With The Wounded need women like you who are motivated to support the Armed Forces community.

Both the Cumbrian Challenge and the Balmoral Challenge welcome teams of four to join us on the fells, or in the Highlands, in order to raise vital funds for our programmes. Our vision is that each team that takes part, supports one ex-serviceperson back into independence.

Our 2018 resolution? To treble the number of exservicemen and women that we support this year.

Here’s how you can get involved this year: The Cumbrian Challenge:

The Balmoral Challenge:

The Cumbrian Challenge, presented by BAE Systems and FDM Group, is Walking With The Wounded’s fun and testing, flagship, annual fundraising event in the Lake District. Meet, walk with and be inspired by our wounded ex-servicemen and women, including members of our expedition teams surrounded by the stunning Cumbrian fells.

“It was so calm, and so solitary, as one gazed around; the pure mountain air was most refreshing. All seemed to breathe freedom and peace, and to make one forget the world and its sad turmoils.” Queen Victoria, Balmoral, Sept 8, 1848

Location: Grasmere, Cumbria Date: 18-19 May 2018 Teams of 4 - £60 per person until 31 Jan (Serving military teams get a 50% discount if they bring a volunteer) Camping available (+ £25 per person) Age restriction: 18+ Each team is challenged to raise £2,000 Routes: Peak (1 peak, circa 16km) Tough (3 peaks, circa 23km) Tougher (4 peaks, circa 29km) Find our more at wwtw.org.uk/Cumbria

The Balmoral Challenge 2018, presented by Artemis, is a unique event for your team of four to meet, be inspired by and walk with our wounded beneficiaries from across Scotland over one of three beautifully challenging routes, starting and finishing in front of Her Majesty the Queen’s Scottish residence, Balmoral Castle.

Location: Balmoral Castle, Aberdeenshire, Scotland Date: 22-23 June 2018 Teams of 4 - £70 per person until 28 February (Serving military teams get a 50% discount if they bring a volunteer) Unique camping opportunity in front of Balmoral Castle ( +£25 per person) Age restriction: 18+ Each team is challenged to raise £2,000 Routes: Triple Crown – The big one. A 30km race back to Balmoral over three Munros from a secret drop-off location.

Prince’s Stone - The thinking one. 20km - 40km depending on how many checkpoints you can collect within 9 hrs! Test your team’s strategy while exploring the wilder parts of the Balmoral Estate – will you take a gamble, or make it back in good time after finding the historic Prince’s Stone?

The Cairn Chaser – The wee one. A 15km foray exploring the cairns in the forests above the castle.

Find our more at wwtw.org.uk/Balmoral Unable to take part, but would like to donate?

Simply text ‘WWTW01 £10’ to 70070.

For more information, please visit wwtw.org.uk Facebook: @WalkingWithTheWounded Instagram: @SupportTheWalk Twitter: @SupportTheWalk YouTube: WalkingWithTheWounded2010 15

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ALCOHOL

AND ME

If you are wallowing in post-festive hangover, you are not alone.

Giving up alcohol is one of the nation’s top ten New Year’s Resolutions. We speak to some ‘Dry January’ participants to find out the pros and cons of quitting and why cutting down can make a big difference to your wellbeing…

I

t’s New Year’s Day, you’ve just forced yourself from your bed and staggered to the kitchen.You survey the cluttered counters which are full of empty bottles, wine-stained glasses and dirty plates. The remnants of last night’s excess make your stomach turn with guilt and embarrassment, but most of all hangover-induced nausea.Your head is pounding, your eyes are sore and you feel sick. You vouch to never drink again. Until, that is, later that day when you go to the neighbour’s New Year’s Day get-together and a glass of prosecco is ‘forced’ upon you by the exuberant and very persuasive host.

The resolution, you sigh to yourself, may have to wait….

The Festive Period is renowned for its seemingly never-ending opportunities to have a ‘tipple’. From the mulled wine at the garrison Carol Concert to cheeky

Bucks Fizz for breakfast on Christmas day to the celebratory cocktails on New Year’s Eve. It’s enough to make you want to quit.

And, come January, this is apparently what a large proportion of the adult population actually do. According to a ComRes survey conducted in 2015, cutting down on booze is one of the top ten most common New Year’s Resolutions with 18 per cent of people attempting to lower their alcohol intake in January.

But despite all these good intentions, few of us see this newfound abstinence through.

Figures also show that 63 per cent of people fail to keep their New Year’s resolutions.

And of that number nearly half throw in the towel in less than a month. For some, life just gets in the way. Take Rachel*, a secondary school teacher, who signed up to the Dry January initiative, in which people vow to give up booze for the entire month.

“It went well until we got the Year 11 mock

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*names changed only absorbing all those toxin into our fat, we aren’t washing it through as effectively as men. Research also shows that alcohol can increase a woman’s chances of getting Breast Cancer. But, both men and women are enhancing their risks of a number of illnesses such as liver disease, heart disease, osteoporosis and cancer when they drink.

Alcohol – Drinking Safely For those who don’t want to give up entirely, here’s a guide to the current guidance and recommendations, as published

by Alcohol Concern.

• Women should not exceed more than 14 units of alcohol a week. That’s seven glasses of wine or seven pints of beer.

• Chief Medical Officer Professor Dame Sally Davies recommends people have several ‘dry’ or alcohol-free days each week.

• Avoid bingeing – spread the unit allowance over three or more days, this will reduce your risk of serious illness or accidents.

• There is no safe level of alcohol to drink when pregnant.

results back,” she says, “then Messrs Pinot and Grigio came out to play again.”

And others found going cold turkey made them obsess more about having a drink than when they indulged. Lizzie*, a trainee midwife, admitted: “I lasted three days. I found that I drank more when trying to be completely free of alcohol.”

But, for every failure, there is a success. And with more and more evidence emerging about the harmful impact of alcohol, there are greater numbers of people willing to cut out, or at least cut down, on their alcohol intake. One of the main reasons people are choosing to quit is because of the health benefits. According to Alcohol Concern, women’s bodies process booze much slower than men’s. The reason for this is that women’s bodies contain more fat – and fat absorbs alcohol. Men also have more water in their bodies than women. The water dilutes alcohol meaning us women are not

Clare Macnaughton, who writes the Modern Military Mother blog about her experiences of being an armed forces spouse, has undertaken several alcohol detoxes as part of a general health kick.

“I gave up booze, sporadically, for a month at a time along with gluten, dairy and sugar.

I drank loads of water and by week two I was sleeping like a baby,” she said. “My skin was amazing, I looked younger and I had more energy.”

Clare admits it was not an easy ride to begin with. For the first week she felt unwell as the sugar withdrawal took place.

She survived this stage by drinking lots of water. At the time of writing, Clare was undergoing a dry spell, which she jokingly described as a “sort of alcohol-free midlife crisis”. She added: “I started by giving up white wine as it gave me heartburn. I found the red was heavier so I drank less of it.

Then I did a few months of cleansing.

“You find, when you drink again, you notice how rubbish it makes you feel… not better.” So what about difficult times, like deployment? Clare said: “I have a ‘don’t drink alone rule’.” To keep her on the right track she found other things to distract her such as binge watching Game of Thrones.

“It was amazing,” she said.

We also spoke to Paul* who is a regular Dry January participant. Like Clare, he found there was a period of time – two weeks in his case – after the start of the detox when he felt poorly. After this he would start to notice the benefits. He described it as “swings and roundabouts”.

Heather Goodwin, on the other hand, is hugely positive about her annual alcoholfree month. “I have just done Sober October. I don’t do January as it’s my birthday month. I really didn’t miss the booze – I found some good alternatives.

“If you like fizz, Bee’s Knees white or rosé is good. I was also given some Seedlip Gin (spice variety) which, with Lamb and Watts tonics was excellent. I never lose weight but I do feel better and wake up clear-headed.

The downside is weird dreams and difficulty in getting to sleep – but that does wear off.”

The health benefits of giving up alcohol – or just taking a month off for Dry January – are well documented. But what people often forget is that lowering alcohol intake can have a marked effect on mental health too. According to Alcohol Concern, one in four participants to Dry January were likely to report an improvement to their wellbeing. What’s more, research by the Public Health Institute in 2016 found that levels of self-harm went down in areas where Dry January participants were highest.

Stephen Buckley, head of information at mental health charity, Mind, said: “Although alcohol is a depressant, many people who are struggling with mental health problems find themselves turning to drink when they’re going through particularly difficult times as a coping strategy. But it can make things worse.” This may sound familiar to many. The anxiety, worry and boredom caused by deployment, for example, can act as a powerful trigger and have even the most strong willed of us reaching for the bottle. Psychologists say that knowing what prompts you into drinking is the first step in being able to control it. By identifying the reason you drink, you can start preparing distractions or activities to do in place of pouring a glass of wine or opening a beer.

You could try Clare’s technique and binge on a boxset. Perhaps try something else which makes you relax such as calling a friend, indulging in a hobby or having a bath. Something as simple as taking up running or dancing can produce the same euphoric effect in our bodies as a glass of wine – but they don’t give you a hangover afterwards!

What if you are worried about a friend’s drinking? Stephen said, “If you’re worried that someone you care about is drinking too much alcohol, it’s really important to let them know you’re there for them whenever they’re ready to talk about how they feel – even if it’s just a text or an email. Listening non-judgementally will help them open up and could give them a nudge to seek support from their GP or local support groups.”

For more information on Dry January go to www.alcoholconcern.org.uk/dry-january

You can read more about Clare’s experiences of military life at: www.amodernmilitarymother.com

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D E C LU TTE RIN G The start of a new year is the ideal time to declutter. But it’s not just our homes which can benefit from having a clearout – the process of detoxing rooms and organising our belongings can have a profound effect on our minds too…

O

rganisation is one of the cornerstones of military life. And, having a clutter-free home is the key to ensuring the next march-out is less stressful than the last.

So, why then, are our houses full of so much crap?

It doesn’t matter how meticulous we are about mess and how many storage solutions we come up with – there will always be that pile of papers tormenting us in the corner of the kitchen. And it seems impossible to escape that heap of broken toys, which we must throw out but cannot possible part with because of their sentimental value.

But, while these unused belongings serve to make our house incredibly untidy – there is another problem too. They are also clogging up our minds.

According to Helen Sanderson, a professional organiser and founder of the Home Declutter Kit, each of those areas of clutter is equivalent to having a pile of unmade decisions sitting in our heads.

“Putting off making decisions,” she explains, “is one way that people accumulate mental and physical clutter, which can lead to stress, [being] overwhelmed and low self-esteem.”

Fear, apparently, is one of the big reasons people put off making decisions. Helen says people fear they will make the wrong decision. Or they may fear the regret or loss of throwing away an item.

But there are other reasons we hang on to our belongings, even if they serve no purpose. Perfectionism, sentimentality and attachment to items which have strong memories are among them, says Helen. And, we must not forget our old friend, procrastination.

But there are also practical reasons why things might be hanging around our homes. How many of you have a ‘to be repaired’ or a ‘handwash only’ pile that you haven’t got around to? Anyone guilty of a box of borrowed goods which you mean to return to a friend? “Sometimes,” says Helen, “it is things sitting around that are waiting to be mended, cleaned, passed on or given back to someone or sold.”

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Whatever the cause behind your clutter, the good news is that there are lots of ways it can be tackled. Even better, according to Helen, simply getting started with this process can release lots of new energy.

“I see it time and time again with the people I work with,” she says, “they have more energy when they let things go and a palpable sense of relief from dealing with things. It leaves you feeling a sense of achievement which increases self-esteem, refreshed with a new clean slate to start new projects and a more relaxed state of mind to enjoy your new daily life.”

Here are some top tips from our experts…

Start right here, right now!

Yes, that’s right, there’s no time like the present. Look for a corner, a shelf or a cupboard and pick five things you don’t want any more.

Lisa Cole, a mum from Bristol who runs decluttering service, less-stuff.co.uk, reckons diving straight in will ensure you start as you mean to go on: “If you are at home when you are reading this,” says Lisa, “look around. Is there anything that you will never get around to mending, reading or wearing?”

Five minutes, five items From having a quick wardrobe clear out when you are choosing an outfit to binning a few items from your kitchen cupboards while the kettle is boiling – even the time poor can squeeze a five-minute declutter into daily life. Aiming to remove five items in this time will keep you focussed on the task and reap long-term decluttering rewards.

09/01/2018 14:08

“You could do this in the morning while you are getting dressed,” says Helen. “If you grab something that doesn’t make you feel good when you wear it – donate it.

You can find time to do little declutters anywhere. I love queuing, not just because I’m British but because it gives me a chance to clean up my texts and photos on my phone.”

In fact, Lisa is adamant that pruning and editing gently over time is a far more effective way of keeping on top of clutter than one big day-long purge involving “a skip and a bottle of wine”. It gets you into a good habit and will save on the skip hire costs!

Ditch worthless stuff Deciding which items to discard needs a bit of thought. Lisa suggests beginning by getting rid of anything which is worthless - items that are broken, for example, or clothing which doesn’t fit. Books you will never read or cheap tat (Christmas cracker contents, remnants of party bags). Once you have banished these items you will have the space to think clearly about the more valuable belongings. And this is where the decision-making can become a little more emotional.

Lisa’s advice is to then get rid of anything which makes you feel sad or which evokes unhappy memories: “For me, decluttering means curating my belongings so I only have things that I love, that are useful or that remind me of really happy times.” She adds: “No matter who gave it to you, or how much it cost, there is no need to keep anything in your home that makes you feel bad in any way.”

Help is at hand If you still find you are struggling to remove belongings, feel overwhelmed or are simply stuck because of the level of clutter in your home, get support. Helen, whose Home Declutter Kit outlines a simple decisionmaking process to help with your home detox, says tapping into an expert will help you gain clarity about the next steps you need to take. “It will help your mind to relax,” she said, “and it will help it feel calmer because it has been given a simple set of decisions or one problem to solve, rather than trying to solve too many at once.”

There are lots of experts in decluttering and organising and we have included details of our two at the end of this feature. There

are also Facebook groups and communities which offer tips and advice.

Keep up the good work Follow Five-Five technique and you can’t go far wrong. Clear out five things, for five days a week, says Lisa, and you can painlessly declutter 1,300 items a year.

“Make it easy for yourself by having a box ready to declutter into and decide where it is going before it is full,” she adds. “Plan how you are going to get the box out of the house too, so it doesn’t sit around for ages.”

Think before you shop Don’t declutter only to fill the newlyacquired space with sales bargains or BOGOF deals. Only buy things that you really need or really, truly love. If you find yourself buying something purely because it’s reduced in price or looks pretty, visualise what will happen to it in a few months’ time. Lisa explains: “I love window shopping but I am saving a fortune now because I can imagine the beautiful things in my decluttering box in a month or so.

“Bargains are not going to save you money unless you have planned to buy them. If you catch yourself spending £50 on a bag because it was reduced from £250 you have only got a bargain if you needed the bag and were going to spend that much anyway.” Oh, and don’t go online shopping under the influence of alcohol!

Reward yourself for a job well done Treat yourself – preferably to something that will not create more clutter. Lisa says, “Your nice things should be celebrated so make some space for them to breathe and so you can enjoy them more.”

“

Lisa Cole runs www.less-stuff. co.uk which is about decluttering for nonminimalists. She has written two books From Piles to Files and Elephants in the Room, they are both available on Kindle.

Visit her website for more decluttering tips, money saving freebies and links to a supportive Facebook group.

From having a quick wardrobe clear

out when you are choosing an outfit to cupboards while the kettle is boiling –

even the time poor can squeeze a fiveminute declutter into daily life.

“

binning a few items from your kitchen

Helen Sanderson is an interior designer, professional organiser, founder of the Ministry of Calm and creator of The Home Declutter Kit. For more information go to helensanderson.com or www. homedeclutterkit.com 21

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FIFTY SHADES

OF FASTING A phenomenon known as intermittent fasting is currently one of the world’s most popular health trends‌ Simply put, it involves alternating cycles of eating and fasting, and there seems to be a way to do it to suit every lifestyle, work schedule and sleeping pattern going. Many studies have been done on intermittent fasting in the last few years and research has shown it can aid weight loss, have anti-ageing benefits, improve metabolic health and even stave off or improve certain diseases such as diabetes by optimising insulin sensitivity. Some scientists even claim it could help you live longer!

The important thing to remember with

intermittent fasting is that it is not the same as starving yourself, and does not encourage unhealthy eating patterns. We all fast every day, when we sleep, and intermittent fasting can be as simple as extending that fast a little longer into your normal day. The most popular intermittent fast is the 16/8 method. In this fasting cycle you would, for example, eat your first meal at noon and your last meal around 8pm before fasting again until noon the next day, essentially cutting breakfast from your diet. Whilst no food is allowed during the fasting periods, you can still take supplements and drink

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water, tea, coffee and other non-caloric beverages.

Really, humans have been fasting for thousands of years. The idea of 3 meals a day is more a cultural artefact than a biological necessity and eating from dawn to dusk gives our bodies a steady stream of glucose which is damaging in excess. Without a break from the taxing requirements of digestion, most of our population is faced with insulin resistance, weight gain, and disease. Our bodies are very well equipped to be able to go for long periods without food, because back when we would have had to hunt and gather there would have been times when there was very little or no food available. Humans and other animals instinctively fast when sick, too. People often mistake this for a bad thing, when really it’s our natural way of concentrating all our energy into repairing what’s wrong rather than having to spend precious energy resources on digestion.

When we are sick our bodies need to put all their energy into healing and fighting off whatever bug has made us poorly, by us temporarily not eating it means they can do this more efficiently and we will recover quicker.

Despite what you may think, intermittent fasting is surprisingly easy to do. Many people actually report having more energy during a fast, and although you may feel hungry for the first few days when you begin fasting, once your body gets used to your new pattern of eating and begins to burn fat stores for energy during your fasting periods the hunger pangs will disappear.

All sorts of processes in the body change when we don’t eat for a while, in order to allow our bodies to thrive during a period of famine. It has to do with hormones, genes and important cellular repair processes. When fasted, we get significant reductions in blood sugar and insulin levels, as well as a drastic increase in human growth hormone. Bodybuilders have heralded intermittent fasting as the optimal way to reduce body fat but increase or maintain muscle mass, and it is now one of the most popular trends in the weight lifting community. It’s been dubbed the ‘Wolverine’ diet by some after it coming to light that Hugh Jackman’s secret to those huge muscles in the famous movies was partly thanks to intermittent fasting alongside his workout regime.

For some, intermittent fasting is a convenient way to improve health and save time by not having to prepare so many meals. For others, it’s a way to lose weight without having to look too closely at what they are consuming. The idea behind intermittent fasting is not to cram in your entire 2000kcal allowance into your eating period but to only eat the meals you would eat normally within those times thus creating a calorie deficit and aiding weight loss. For the 16/8 method this means skipping breakfast but then having a typical lunch and typical dinner, maybe with a healthy snack thrown in there too. With intermittent fasting you are not only cutting the calories from an entire meal but you are also not consuming food long enough to force your body into burning its fat stores, this begins to happen after around 12 hours of fasting. After around 16 hours of fasting the body releases a surge of growth hormones, this is a good thing for anyone over the age of 30 as this growth hormone has an antiaging effect and can actually help us look younger!

By one definition, fasting means “to abstain from all food.” But it also means “to eat sparingly, or of certain types of foods.”

Another fasting method is the well-known 5/2 diet. In this schedule of intermittent fasting you eat normally for 5 days of the week and fast for 2. On your fasting days you are allowed 500kcal, which can be spread out throughout the day or consumed in one single meal. The fasting days do not have to run consecutively.

The randomness of the 5:2 diet can be challenging for some people, as it can be difficult to limit yourself to so few calories

on fasting days after being able to eat normally for a few days previously.Your body never really gets to adjust to a solid eating pattern and it can be hard to stick to when feeling hungry for so long.

Another more aggressive method is the 5 day fast.You don’t cut out food completely on this, but limit yourself to 1000 calories the first day and then 725 calories per day for the remaining four. This method should only be used once a month, meaning you’re free to eat normally for the rest of the month, however it’s very hard to go with so few calories for 5 days in a row and is considered one of the more challenging ways to fast. The 16/8 method, as mentioned before, is generally thought to be the easiest and possibly most effective method of fasting.

Whilst calorie counting isn’t absolutely necessary on a fasting diet, it’s important to remember that what you do consume during eating periods does still matter. If you fill you 8 hour eating window with donuts and high-fat fried food you are obviously not going to see any benefit.

Sticking to whole, lean and nutritious food, mixing in some healthy fats, will give your body exactly what it needs to thrive and get you through the fasting periods.

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Pauline Havelock-Searle

MBACP (Vol Prac.). FAPHP, MIAEBP, MNRPC (Accrd.), UKRC, FDAP (Accrd.) Advanced BWRT Practitioner, level 1, 2 & 3, EMDR Practitioner, MBBRS (Founder Member)

Telephone no. 020 8723 5840 or 07956154887 http://www.paulinehavelockhypnotherapy.co.uk Email: pauline.havelock@ntlworld.com

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I am a Hypno-Analyst/Hypno-Therapist, Addiction Counsellor, Counsellor and Family Therapist based in London. I am also an EMDR Practitioner and a BWRT Practitioner. I have worked for many years with all stress related problems. I now work via Skype and Facetime, using BWRT, thus enabling me to work worldwide.

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www.sammchugh.magnetix-wellness.com 25

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SHOP THE

Highstreet

‘Cosmo’ Lamp £80 | Alyssa Duvet Set from £35 | Teal Pompom Duvet Set £50 | Cushions from £18

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DEBENHAMS

Towels £24

Cosmopolitan

Tall Pink Metal Candle Holder £14

Cushion £18 Wooden Pendant £70

Cushion £20 Multi Coloured Cushion £20 Bath Mat £20 Table Light £35

Metallic Dot Towels £24

Metal Dust Bin £8

Tea For Two Set £28

FLYING TIGER Bathroom Edit Toilet Brush £8

Mirror with Stand £6

Braided Hanging Basket £4

Soap Dispenser £3

Soap Dish £1

Toothbrush Mug £2

Storage Box 3 Drawers £4

Bath Scales £15

27 Metal Hanging Basket £3

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SAINSBURYS Side Plate £3.25

Hanging Print £4

Tea Towels, 3pk £6

Riviera

Pasta Bowl £3.75

Runner £12 Rope Printed Bed Linen Double £16

Raindrops Mug £4.25

Boat Print Cushion £10

Pot Pourri £5 Navy Stripe Button Cushion £10

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Spot Print Riveria Cushion 50x50 £14

Just for Her issue 16 2017.indd 28

Navy Fleece Throw £10

09/01/2018 14:09

Oil Slick Biscuit Canister

GEORGE HOME Unicorns

Unicorn Shaped Mug

Unicorn Egg Cup Cloud Tea For One,

Unicorn Egg Cups

Unicorn Teapot

Rainbow Butter Dish

Sprayed Stem Wine Glass Pink & Blue 2pk

Prices not released at time of press

16 Piece Iridescent Cutlery Set

Just for Her issue 16 2017.indd 29

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M&S

Bringing The Outside In

Jute & Chenille Woven Rug £109 | Capri Table Lamp £59 | Set Of 2 Raffia And Seagrass Baskets £45 | Medium Wide Neck Vase £19.50 Fern In Grey Pot £25 | Small Cheese Plant In Ceramic Pot £19.50 | Small Hexagonal Lantern £25 | Small Wide Neck Vase £12.50 Linen Cushion £19.50 | Ladybird Embroidered Cushion £15 | Watercolour Stripe Bed Set £49.50

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Bug Print Bed Set £49.50 | Supersoft Throws £29.50

09/01/2018 14:09

Ladybird Embroidered Cushion £15

Hydrangeas In Mercury Vase £29.50

Watercolour Stripe Bed Set £49.50

Bug Print Bed Set £49.50

Ombre Glass Lantern £19.50

Butterfly Enamel Tin Jug £19.50

Set of 2 Tea Towels £12 Set of Six Heart Tealights £16

LAURA ASHLEY Hearts Mug £10

Feel The Love Felt Heart Bunting £16

Single Heart Mug £10

Set of 4 Coasters £8 Set of 4 Placemats £18

Just for Her issue 16 2017.indd 31

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Fusion Home Collection, Prices TBC

WILKO Fusion Home Tile Repeat Throw £15

Shibori Pattern Cushion 43 x 43cm £7

Ombre Blue Tea Light Holder £4 Resin Elephant £7 Red Metal Lantern £6

Tile Photo Frame £4

Blue Tiles Cushion £7

Elephant Plaque £3

Tassel Textured Terracotta Cushion £8

Lotus Flower and Orchid in Tank, Price TBC

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Crushed Velvet Effect Cushion Gold £6

09/01/2018 14:10

Annemarie Hawley MBACP Psychotherapeutic Counsellor 07958568257 allneedsome12listen@gmail.com

MIDLANDS MILITARY CATCHMENT

Because sometimes we all need someone to listen

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MIDLANDS MILITARY CATCHMENT

Not just for Him!

By Blanche Gal www.itsaboutyouphoto.com Doing a boudoir photoshoot is often thought as a present for the other half but most of my clients come to me for a boudoir shoot to celebrate themselves and embrace their own self and beauty. I truly believe that we as women need much more self care as we often get lost and hide behind our everyday duties, work, family, children and we especially like to hide behind the camera.

Boudoir is an amazing experience to get more comfortable with our body, it also gives us a huge confidence boost of accepting ourself and our body in your true beauty.

It is also an unforgettable transformation as having professional hair and makeup done for the shoot as well as a great reason to buy some exciting and new lingerie for our wardrobe. Boudoir can be everything we feel sexy, from being dressed up and just suggesting sensual feelings up to being sexy, seductive, cute, playful or even be nude - and my photography is DESIGNED FOR YOU to meet your needs and dreams of being professionally photographed.

My clients are not models, they are all everyday women just like you - mothers, daughters, sisters, wives, brides, singles, regardless of curves, sizes, shapes or ages. They are all nervous just like you would be, when arriving for their photoshoot after styling consultation. Hair and makeup takes about an hour before the shoot and then I help them through posing and directing as I know what beautiful looks like which they find relaxing.

All of them are leaving with a great experience and fun behind at the end, knowing that the results are going to be stunning.

My mission is to empower women and I believe all women should experience this amazing feeling. My goal is to help you accept your body, your beauty, to show you your amazing femininity, to give you a huge confidence boost and to show how perfect you are. There will never be perfect time, you can keep it up and delay - but better just give it a go and celebrate who you are NOW. Cherish yourself and be proud - and I will show you through my images of you that you are worth it, you are good enough and that you are so beautiful inside and outside.

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MIDLANDS MILITARY CATCHMENT

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Providing a safe and ethical environment and ensuring that you feel supported and calm, our therapists can help you transform your day to day life, help you realise your potential, and get you back on track to being your best. If you have any comments or questions, please look at the Services page on our website for ideas and prices and see our contact page for details.

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PROFILE

Military

& Me

Name - Lisa Age - 30-something Current Location - Near Portsmouth

Worst thing about military life?

When and how did you meet your partner?

We met when he was training up in Scotland, near Glasgow. We went to a local pub, brilliantly called the Rhu Inn (say it out loud), chatted A LOT, he forgot to pay for his drink and we left just before closing time after arranging to take a day trip to Edinburgh the next weekend. Brave, but it worked out well! He pretty much moved in after a few weekends.

Best thing about military life?

My husband in his uniform! Actually, although we all moan a bit about them, where else do you get houses to rent for such an absolute pittance? They are sizable, you’re able to decorate however you like as long as you slap magnolia on the walls on the way out, you are allowed pets... you’d be hard-pushed to find better terms in rented accommodation on civvie street! However, this only applies to married couples and I think it is about time the military recognised that long-term partnerships, without wedding bands, exist!

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The incompatibility with civilian life! We don’t have kids and so I am able work full time, unlike understandably many partners who have children to look after. I was well established in my teaching job but had to make the choice between staying put and only seeing my partner at weekends (BIG respect for the weekend warriors) or relocating my life and career south of the border where he is likely to be based… for how long? It could all change again next month and we will up sticks and start over.

It’s difficult and I think that’s not to be underestimated. It is an unusual job, you end up in unusual circumstances and often that involves huge sacrifices along the way.

Favourite posting?

I think we really enjoyed the first ship he was on based fully down in Pompey. It involved a deployment, but the crew were excellent, the ship came to mean a lot to us and we got engaged/planned the wedding/ married all whilst he was on it.

How do you deal with goodbyes?

I don’t! Not one little bit. I’ve done airport drop offs and flown away from him and each and every time I have cried like a baby.

Apparently I am chatty and facetious until the flight is called and then I just weep. I drive away/sit on a plane/watch him go feeling utterly blue. I’m usually better the next day. I put my big girl pants on, go to work and get on with it. With occasional breakdowns along the way.

Do you have certain coping mechanisms for dealing with the absence of your partner?

Work takes care of that. I’m a teacher

so I have to get up and cope or the kids don’t get taught. Teenagers are a brilliant distraction from your woes as they are utterly and reliably hilarious and wonderful to be around. Also coffee. SO much coffee.

What’s your guilty secret when he’s away? No shaving? Cereal for dinner? Towie re-runs?!

Gossip Girl on repeat and mini-adventures involving coffee and cake - just me and a book.

Do you do anything special when your partner returns?

Usually we do afternoon tea! It’s nice to do something fancy after he’s been living in a tin can for a while.

Homecoming meal?

Take away!

Homecoming outfit?

Jeans and a nice top. And heels if I’m feeling confident I wont have to stand for too long, I know by now that they keep you waiting at Brize, so relaxed smiles trump a twisted look of discomfort as the first thing he sees when he comes through those doors.

What’s your top tip for new military partners?

‘Dislocation of expectation’. I’m a born planner and I’ve learned the hard way - just don’t.

What three words would you use to describe military partners?

‘More than that’.You’re not just defined by the military - that’s what they do. My husband is as much a teacher’s husband as I am a Navy wife.

Would you like to feature in the next issue?

Email us at justforher@forcespublishing.co.uk

09/01/2018 14:10

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CONTRIBUTION

Blog of Royal Marine’s wife attracts thousands thanks to honest birth story…

The M arine Wife and Mum A Royal Marine’s wife is reaching thousands with her honest blog about pregnancy, being a military spouse and the difficulty of the first weeks postpartum.

Faye Copp, from Whitley Bay, Tyne and Wear was encouraged to start the blog, The Marine Wife and Mum, from family members and was also inspired by other mum bloggers.

The 32-year-old uses humour and honesty in her posts and after the birth of her son, Rafe Owen, with husband Chris, on October 6th, almost eight thousand people have read her birth story.

The former journalist had planned a relaxing water birth but after the baby’s

heart rate dropped - she was rushed to hospital.

In her account of her birth story, she describes the pain of childbirth: “I really wanted to be that person you see on One Born Every Minute who makes no sound but that didn’t happen. I wasn’t screaming but I was making a groaning noise loud enough for most of Scotland to hear. If I could describe the pain it would be....you know in Indian Jones Raiders of the Lost Arc and Harrison Ford is getting chased by that giant bolder? Well imagine feeling

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©Nigel John - www.nigeljohn.com

©David McIntosh - www.davidmcintoshstudios.com

like you are trying to push that out of your bum - and then someone is squeezing your stomach together as hard as they can.Yeah - it’s fun.”

the hell you are doing....but then he makes a little gurgling sound when he’s feeding and then all is right in the world. Then the cycle repeats itself...”

The mum-of-one says she is overwhelmed by the response to her blog: “To start with it was more therapeutic to put what I was feeling into words. What it’s like to be a Royal Marine wife - pregnant, and now In a follow up post, Faye talks about the first with a three-month old baby,” she said. “But I have been overwhelmed by the responses few weeks after labour, detailing the fear from people who of the first poo, have shared their the struggle of own experiences breastfeeding and and also thanked her post-labour me for being body, which so honest. I she describes as was particularly looking like a nervous about ‘bag of sand’. posting the photo She also shares of me after labour a photo of but I think it’s herself nine days’ important to be postpartum. as honest and open as you can She writes: as there’s nothing “To say labour worse than was tough is an seeing Instagram understatement “The former journalist had planned a relaxing photos of women but nothing can water birth but after the baby’s heart rate looking amazing quite prepare you who have just for after labour. dropped - she was rushed to hospital…” given birth - it’s The exhaustion, not real. Well for me it isn’t!” the blood, the hormones, the tears at two in the morning when your baby won’t Faye hopes to carry on sharing her latch on, that first poo (yours and baby), the experiences - and wants to put together a aches, the pain in your vagina, exhaustion, collection of birth stories of other women becoming a milking machine, your postto help prepare - not scare, women who are birth body, the overwhelming feeling that about to give birth. you are failing and you have no idea what People from across the world have reached out to share their own experiences and thank Faye, who lives in Arbroath, Scotland, for her honesty.

©Nigel John - www.nigeljohn.com

To read the blog, go to: http://www.themarinewifeandmum.com/blog 39

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10 Things We Took For Granted....

Imagine being able to decorate your home in any way you liked?

Not having to wait three months to find out where your husband put the spare car key? And never having to leave your friends to relocate to the other end of the country? We took so much for granted before we entered into armed forces life.

Here’s our lighthearted look at some other things we miss…

Privacy..

Once upon a time, many years ago in another place, another world, another galaxy people used to completely ignore each other.You could inhabit a home in a street crammed tight with scores of adjoining dwellings and never know a soul.You would be lucky to have even glimpsed the man or woman who lived on the other side of your house’s paper-thin dividing wall. This person, also known as “your neighbour”, could have been a serial killer or a famous actor.You would never have known because, quite frankly, you weren’t interested.

Attempting conversation would have been too much like hard work when you were mega-busy going about your hectic life.

People hark back to the days when we knew all our neighbours, had a detailed insight into their private lives and left our doors open for them to pop into whenever they needed a gossip or a spare cup of sugar.

But, having had just that existence on patch, you are nostalgic for a time when no one knew who you were. When you could put your bin out without someone seizing the opportunity to sign you up for a cake sale.

Oh for those summer afternoons when you could sunbathe in your garden without fear that someone was spying on you over the fence and making judgements about your neglected lawn and grimy windows.

What you would give for just an hour of anonymity!

Tidy calendars..

If you are one of those people who keep their calendars and diaries as a keepsake you may have noticed that before the armed forces was thrust upon you they were very neat. There were very few events which had been scribbled over, Tippexed out or annotated. And it would have been highly irregular to find scraps of paper stuck to them where plans had been altered so many times there was no space left on the calendar to write.

Yes, before you launched yourself into the chaos and disruption that is military life you probably thought having a lovely, tidy calendar with neat handwriting and firm plans was your right. Pencilling-in, you thought in your pre-military days, was for when you lost your biro.You laughed at those ‘wipe clean’ calendars in WH Smith and wondered who would need something like THAT? How things change. Turns out those industrial-looking whiteboard style

calendars are a blessing from God. Well… providing the kids don’t wipe the lot during a game of “School Role Plays”….

Colour..

Yes, believe it not, other palettes do exist in the Dulux range beyond Magnolia. And, once upon a time we were allowed to experiment with these and – yes –actually paint them on our walls! There were reds, blues, greens, purples… pinks. Oh, those glorious pastels, citrus notes and hues of nature! There were tones designed to create comfort and light in north-facing rooms, shades which enhanced drab spaces and bold colours to create depth and warmth.

Before entering this military life we felt overwhelmed by all these shades. We weren’t sure whether the eggshell or the gloss offered the most effective yet aesthetically-pleasing finish. We weighed up the pros and cons of the uber-stylish yet slightly more expensive Farrow and Ball range and we purchased samples with which to test walls.

It was all too much. But now we wish we

“If someone offered you the chance to paint your walls in Putrid Purple you would go for it because it’s just so much more interesting that beige! “

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had even a fraction of that choice back. If someone offered you the chance to paint your walls in Putrid Purple you would go for it because it’s just so much more interesting that beige! Anything is more interesting than beige.

Having one address in seven years..

When we were young, the idea of travelling the world and living in lots of interesting places was beyond exciting. I mean, who on earth would be so boring they would want to live in one house for their entire life…

In fact, for longer than a couple of years?

Well….erm…. anyone who has been a military spouse for longer than about three weeks, actually.

feeling didn’t exist before you became embroiled in military life. But now it does exist. And that is for one reason – the constant, looming threat of The Dreaded Walk Out. Before you entered into patch life, you were blissfully unaware of the torture involved in carrying out a fingertip search of every morsel of your home for stains, cracks, holes, rips and any other evidence of wear and tear caused during your tenure.Yes, there was a time – once – when you didn’t need to lay a sheet of plastic on the carpet when that very clumsy friend who has a penchant for red wine popped around on a Friday night. You allowed your children to use felt tip pens and paint and you were almost blasé about where people placed hot items in the kitchen. But now… now…. these mere trifles will have you teetering on the edge of insanity.You will permanently walk on eggshells when anyone is in the house and you will howl at anyone who threatens to so much as brush an arm against the magnolia wall.

Identity..

These days you can only dream about living in one place for more than 18 months.

And dream you do. Sometimes, you like to imagine all the time freed up by not having to fill out endless change-of-address forms.You fantasise about going longer than a year without trawling through every online account to change your address in case you accidentally book a delivery to your old home. And it would be such a relief not to have to write five different addresses on those forms where they ask for all (yes! ALL) your places of residence for the last five years! Arrrrgh! Because, you rarely remember them all – you can’t even recall the country in which you were based for the first posting! Yes, travel and seeing new and wonderful places is completely overrated.

Sanity..

You know that thing you do when your kids ram their scooter into the front door or tug at the curtains, thus ripping out the pole and a large clump of lintel with it…?

It’s a kind of howl that would put a frenzied warewolf to shame. It’s a pained noise; a high-pitched, hopeless sound, infused with months of stored-up stress and anxiety. It is a sound which says: “that’s another bloody thing on the list of repairs.” This noise/

Wouldn’t it be nice if someone knew you as … well… you? Instead of being called “Dave’s wife” or, even worse, “Nobby’s Missus” you were referred to by your own name. This happened before you entered military life. People used your actual name.

They might associate you with what job you did, what school you went to, the sport you excelled at or the musical instrument you played.

However, now that you are married to the military, you may as well toss that Master’s Degree in the bin because it won’t mean a thing to anyone.You will feel, most of the time, that you are ‘someone’s wife’. No one will employ you, because you move around too much. There’s no room to store your beloved double bass or state-of-theart astronomy kit because your service accommodation has just enough storage space for a foldaway cheese grater. To be honest, you are so busy dealing with minor repairs to your home, hiding from the neighbours and re-organising your calendar for the billionth time that you won’t have time for your interests or a career anyway.

Repairs being completed this century..

This is one for you service accommodation

people out there. We expect you all used to moan when, in your civilian rented home, you called your landlord to report a fault and he or she said “ooh, sorry I can’t fix your boiler until tomorrow… but I’ll send someone around first thing in the morning.”You would have been fuming at the thought of 12 hours without heating. This kind of neglectful, irresponsible, antiquated behaviour was totally unacceptable and you would most likely have been poised to write a very angry letter to Anne Robinson about this injustice… this infringement of your human rights! An entire half day without water!? What was your inconsiderate, flaky, rogue landlord thinking?

However, now that you are in service accommodation having something repaired within 12 hours would be nothing short of a miracle. In fact even 12 weeks would be pretty impressive. To be fair, you would be pretty happy with a 12 month lead time – that would be an improvement, at least.

When your pals from back home complain of a three-week wait for their electrician you are insanely jealous and tell them to think themselves lucky. And as for those entitled people with their mould-free walls and fully-functioning damp-proof courses well… they can just go back into their ivory tower as far as you are concerned.

A reliable internet connection..

Now, let’s get one thing straight: you have always valued the benefits of superfast broadband or, at least, having a decent connection to the web. After all, there was nothing worse than losing the link when you were lurking on a particularly juicy bun fight on Facebook. And that feeling when you’ve done the whole Sainsbury’s shop and the router starts flashing orange…

That is just painful. But, until your beloved is deployed on active duty you will never, ever take having a top notch, reliable broadband provider for granted again. Ever.

The whole ‘losing the Sainsbury’s shop’ debacle pales into insignificance when you have waited an entire month for a chat with your deployed partner, you have only got as far as “where did you put the tin opener?” on the huge list of questions and there’s a communication problem his end and - puff! he’s gone.You know the next call won’t be for another four weeks and you didn’t even tell him you loved him… Still, at least you can open that tin of baked beans at last.

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CONTRIBUTION

Just a Thought...

By Katie V

It is possible to be lonely while surrounded by people.

I speak from experience…

S

o far in my military career I have spent nearly 8 years living in Single Living Accommodation (SLA). And while I now live in married quarters, I haven’t forgotten how being a single person living-in felt. I would work hard all week looking forward to the weekend, only to finish a little early on a Friday, head back to my room and then wonder what to do. There I was sitting in the same four walls; literally a bedsit but without the convenience of a kitchenette or en suite. Dinner would be rigidly available in the Mess between 5-6pm and then I would have the whole evening left to fill. Now, a lot of people down the corridor would go out every week. In fact they would go out practically every night of the week, there really didn’t need to be much excuse! But I have never been one of those people, I don’t really enjoy drinking until I can’t remember or going out to noisy clubs with sticky floors. It’s just not me. I prefer quiet drinks with friends or dinner where I can hear and enjoy a conversation. Better still, a house party where I can relax and be sociable without queuing for ages to be served or spend hours putting on my war paint.

Now that I live-out it is much easier to enjoy my time away from work in the way I like. There is also always housework to keep me busy or simple domestic improvements to pursue. This might not sound exciting, but it is important and it does fill a large part of the time from finishing work on Friday to going back on Monday

morning. And that removes some of the opportunity to feel lonely or wonder how to amuse myself.

When I lived-in I sometimes used to find the time from Friday night to Monday morning vast, a huge crevasse that was hard to cross on my own. And I would feel ridiculous. What did I have to feel sad about? But I did feel sad. I was surrounded by people, but I was lonely.

My mother’s advice was to go out and do something, keep busy.

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“When I lived-in I sometimes used to find the time from Friday night to Monday morning vast, a huge crevasse that was hard to cross on my own.

And I would feel ridiculous. What did I have to feel sad about?

But I did feel sad.”

And, as usual, she was right. Sitting alone and staying indoors was not the answer (unless I was doing something- sewing, playing a musical instrument, reading a book or similar). But what to do and where to go? In some ways it really didn’t matter, I just had to do something.

A membership to the National Trust turned out to be a good investment; safe place for a walk, easy parking and always a cafe to have a coffee and some cake in. The cinema (yes you can go alone, everyone just sits in the dark in silence anyway!), a museum or gallery, an outdoor market... there really are lots of choices! The leaflet stands you see in tourist information offices, train stations or the Hive are all good starting points if you are lacking in ideas.

And of course, you could knock on the doors of those around you - the occupants might not be your best friends but they too might be in need of companionship now and again, and friendships that blossom have to start somewhere.

So, next time you have a long weekend ahead of you and you feel a little blue, try not to dwell, just pick up your bag and coat, put on an optimistic smile (even if you have to pretend a bit!) and head out somewhere, anywhere. It’s ok to admit you feel lonely while surrounded by people but don’t let it spoil your hard earned spare time.

Just a thought…

Just for Her is looking for interesting and relevant articles about the Service community…

If you have something you have written, ideally with pictures too, then please send your articles in to justforher@forcespublishing.co.uk.

JustHer for

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Grow Your Own AN ALLOTMENT YEAR JANUARY One of the coldest winter months, you may not think there is much to be done in the garden during this month but there are many jobs to be getting on with!

Harvest…

Brussel sprouts, cabbages, leeks and parsnips.

Sow… Patience is key in January, with the days being too short and too cold for anything to really benefit from being planted just yet.

Onions, lettuce, peas, broad beans, radish and carrots seeds can possibly be sown towards the end of the month but they will need to be under poly tunnels or in the greenhouse.

Seed potatoes will available from the end of the month. Order your seed potatoes and collect seed trays or wooden tomato trays ready to chit them in. January is a good month to clean the shed, greenhouse, tools and linseed oil any wooden handles in preparation for the coming year. Check that your watering can and buckets don’t leak and that the wheelbarrow doesn’t have a flat wheel!

FEBRUARY We might just see our first glimpses of Spring this month. The soil begins to warm up around mid February and fruit trees and bushes will have their first buds beginning. All of these are signs that it’s safe to start thinking about sowing your first early rows of peas and broad beans.

Harvest…

Winter salad leaves, swedes, kale, chicory, brussels sprouts, parsnips.

Sow… Spring onions, garlic, shallots.

If you have fruit trees, check them over for any signs of disease or damage from winter winds. Late fruiting raspberry bushes need to be pruned down as low as possible and mulch around them to ensure an abundant harvest come autumn.

MARCH By now we should be standing in the threshold of Spring and are finally at the beginning of the new gardening season.

The days are beginning to lengthen and it may not feel like it at times but the temperature is slowly creeping up day by day! The longer days are the real trigger of new growth, although any crops sown now may need a little protection from the cold.

Don’t be disheartened if not everything you plant makes it this early in the year, you

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have plenty of time to re-sow and it’s always worth giving it a try!

Harvest…

Swiss chard, brussels sprouts, rhubarb, lambs lettuce.

Sow… Potatoes, spinach, summer cabbage, early types of beetroot, turnips.

Plant out any early cultivars of potatoes as soon as possible and follow on planting at regular intervals. Transplant any early peas, broad beans, cabbages or lettuce that you may have started off earlier in the year.

Sowing short rows of Brussels sprouts, summer cabbage, broccoli, onions and leeks in nursery beds means they will be ready to be transplanted in April. Clear off any old leaves from old strawberry plants and protect any new flowers from frost when needed.

APRIL Hopefully some warm sunshine is on the horizon this month, but pay attention to the weather and keep an eye out for any signs of night frost! Pests come out of hiding this time of year and you will need to take action against the first broods of aphids.

Protect any early strawberries with netting to keep the birds away.

Harvest…

Asparagus, spinach, salad leaves.

Sow… Potatoes, carrots, parsnips, kohl rabi, turnips.

Sow under glass, in pots and trays filled with fresh seed compost, the seeds of runner beans, sweet corn, courgettes, pumpkins, squashes, ridge cucumber. It is now safe to transplant the cold greenhouse tomatoes in to their final positions but keep some frost protection handy.You could plant up a new asparagus bed but bear in mind it will take two more years to establish before producing succulent shoots. Early sowings of Brussels sprouts will need thinning out this month and the soil for next month’s transplanting of sweet corn, courgettes, marrows, pumpkins and ridge cucumbers will need preparing.

MAY The first month of Summer, at last! The biggest threat to any young plants this month is the ground drying up too quickly, be it through heat from the sun or from the wind. Be sure to keep everything well watered and if any plants look like they are flagging try giving them some shade. However, British summertime is notoriously unreliable and whilst we can hope this month brings warmth and sunny days it could also go entirely the other way and bring frosts, floods and cold winds, so be prepared to take steps to protect your plants from all types of weather if necessary!

Harvest…

Sprouting broccoli, cabbage, spinach, rhubarb, spring onions, early sown lettuce, beetroot, radish and peas.

Sow… Dwarf and climbing French beans, courgettes, pumpkins, squashes.

Leeks, brussels and French beans sown last month can now be planted outdoors. This is your last opportunity to sow peas and parsnips this year so if you haven’t already got them in and want to, now is the time to do it!

Whilst they are still small, thin out the seedlings of beetroot, carrots, lettuce, onions, parsnips, turnips and always water along the row to settle the disturbed seedlings back in once the job is completed. Put up poles for runner and climbing French beans.

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Support peas and broad beans before they become too tall. Keep hoeing between crops to control weeds and you can also create a “dust mulch” to conserve precious soil moisture. Try to water in the cool of the evening if possible using a watering can to direct the water around the root area of the crops. If you can get it, put some straw underneath the developing strawberry fruits to keep them off the soil and try to avoid watering overhead to reduce any problems with mildew.

JUNE Look out for blackfly on broad beans, greenfly on peas, lettuce, cabbage root fly, carrot fly, thrip damage on brassicas especially when the plants are small. Spray the affected plants with soapy water (diluted washing up liquid).

The risk of frost should have passed by now, thank goodness! If the weather is dry then water the ground thoroughly before sowing any seeds, this way the young plants will develop a better root system.

Harvest…

Beetroot, broad beans, cabbage, cauliflower, early peas, early potatoes, lettuce, rhubarb, spring onions, radish and spinach.

Sow… Brussels sprouts, cabbages, cauliflowers, celeriac, courgettes, outdoor cucumbers,

French and runner beans, leeks, pumpkins, squashes, sweet corn, outdoor tomatoes can all be planted out into their final position now. They will need to be watered carefully and protected from birds with netting.

Thinning out seedlings is important to encourage good growth in the plants that are left. Train any climbing plants along canes. Hoeing the earth between crops at regular intervals helps to break down the soil and allows water to soak into the ground better. Deter carrot fly, which is most common this time of year. You can cover plants with horticultural fleece or place two foot high barriers around the plants.

when needed. The end of this month is the time to prune apple and pear trees, this will encourage good growth next summer.

Harvest…

JULY

Tomatoes, beans, potatoes, carrots, garlic, shallots, strawberries.

July can be one of the driest months.

Keep watering and hoeing between crops regularly. It is best to water in the cool of the morning or late evening.Your allotment should now be in full production and you should be reaping the rewards of all your hard work.

Harvest…

Potatoes, garlic, shallots, tomatoes, artichoke, plums, strawberries, early pears and apples.

Sow… Overwintering kale, spring cabbage, chicory, spinach beet, hardy onions.

Now is the best time to sow the main crop of carrots to avoid attack from root flies.

Plant out the last of marrows, pumpkins, squash, overwintering cabbages and leeks.

Water all crops at least once a week.You can draw up the soil around Brussels sprouts and sweet corn to encourage extra roots. If the weather is hot and humid this month, you could be in for a bout of potato blight. Fungicides containing copper can help to prevent this. An infected plant will have watery rot on its leaves and should be binned or burned – don’t add it to your compost as it will only spread the infection to next year’s crop.

AUGUST If you holiday over the summer months make sure you ask a friend or neighbour to keep an eye on your crop and to water them for you

Sow… Radishes and lettuce will still produce a crop, make any last sowings now.

Early grapes if you have a vine could be ready soon, and prepare to lift onions towards the end of the month. Wait until the top of the onion plant begins to fall over as this indicates that the bulb has stopped swelling. Damsons and plums will be in full swing so harvest regularly, now is a great time to make some damson jam or sloe gin ready for Christmas! Soft fruit such as raspberries and strawberries will be cropping well by now.

SEPTEMBER This month is a good time to take stock of the successes and failures of the last year and to plan your allotment for the coming 12 months. Some consider September to be the start of the new gardening year, and if you are starting from scratch you have plenty of time to prepare the ground and plan your perfect allotment.

Harvest…

Onions, potatoes, apples, pears, the last of the strawberries and raspberries.

Sow… Oriental vegetables, hardy lettuce and spinach.

Plant out earlier sown spring cabbage but net it to protect from birds. Shorter cooler days mean oriental vegetable seeds will germinate quickly and they are hardy enough to withstand the cold winter months. Feed all late crops with a good fertiliser and clear away spent crops and give

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and if you can cover them when it frosts.

Now is a great time to plant new fruit trees and bushes and old soft fruit bushes can be moved now if needed. the ground a rough dig over for the winter.

Wasps can be a nuisance this time of year when they are attracted to ripening fruit, hang wasp traps to stop them.

OCTOBER

plants to prevent them being blown over in strong winds.

NOVEMBER

Autumn is well under way, and October brings chilly mornings and spooky evenings.

The clocks go back an hour at the end of this month so make every second of light count when you’re in the garden before the dark winter nights are upon us once again!

No time to rest. There is just enough daylight to clear and tidy up the allotment of any old crops in preparation for next year. Don’t leave the remains of summer crops to rot and harbour overwintering pests and diseases. Wait for a clear, crisp, sunny day and go for it! You can reward yourself with a nice hot chocolate afterwards..!

Harvest…

Harvest…

Pumpkins, squashes, the last of the tomatoes, peas, and runner beans.

Winter cabbage, Brussels sprouts, leeks and parsnips.

Sow…

Sow…

Winter lettuce, winter hardy peas, overwintering onion and garlic.

Hardy peas, winter variety broad beans, fruit trees and bushes.

Although winter seed varieties are tough enough to withstand most British winters it is always best to have some protection on hand ready to protect them if needs be. Wet growing conditions can wreak as much damage as the cold. Try to place them somewhere protected from cold icy blasts,

Early leeks can now be lifted and potatoes need to be out of the ground before the end of the month. Any unripe tomatoes can be placed in a shoebox or drawer and left to ripen there. Rough dig your soil and leave in large clumps for it to be broken down naturally by winter rain and frosts.

If you have a greenhouse, now is a good time to insulate it to keep frosts away from any plants you may have in there. Stake any Brussels sprouts and sprouting broccoli

DECEMBER The year is coming to a close, and December has the shortest day in it which heralds the slow advance towards the next season. Allow yourself some relaxing time over Christmas and the New Year and be ready to get it all going again next year, reflecting on any mistakes you have made with crops this year!

Harvest…

Brussels sprouts, winter cabbage, parsnips, leeks.

Sow… The only real thing worth sowing this month is onion seeds, in trays or pots towards the very end of the month.

If you have stored any produce check on it regularly for rot and pests, especially from mice and rats. Take some time to check over your tools in the shed, add new ones to your Christmas list if you need them!

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Mother’s Day

Oh how we love a

ROASTS

Sunday roast, and what better way to celebrate Mothering Sunday than cooking your mum one!

It’s a great opportunity to get the whole family together, but if traditional roasts have become a little bit too predictable for you we’ve done some research and have found the best twists on this classic British tradition to get your taste buds tingling. Dig in!

Spatchcock chicken with maple syrup, figs and farro Serves 5 1.6kg chicken 2 tbsp Dijon mustard 4 tbsp maple syrup leaves from 6 sprigs of thyme For the figs 8 figs, stalks snipped off and fruit halved lengthwise 2 tbsp maple syrup 1 tbsp balsamic vinegar For the farro 200g (7oz) farro 1 tbsp white balsamic vinegar Half tsp Dijon mustard 4 tbsp fruity extra-virgin olive oil 2 tbsp hazelnut oil ½ tbsp maple syrup 1 small onion, very finely sliced 1 tbsp olive oil 2 garlic cloves, crushed ¼ tsp ground ginger 35g (1½oz) salad leaves 35g (1½oz) toasted pecans, roughly chopped

• Preheat the oven to 200°C/400°F/ gas mark 6.

• To spatchcock the chicken, set the bird on your worktop breast-side down and legs towards you. Using good kitchen scissors, cut through the flesh and bone along both sides of the backbone from the tail to the head. Remove the backbone.

• Ten minutes before the end of the roasting time, put the figs, cut-side up, into a small roasting-tin or ovenproof dish. Mix together the maple syrup and balsamic and spoon over the figs. Season and put into the oven with the chicken.

• Open the chicken, turn it over and flatten it by pressing hard on the breastbone with the heel of your hand. Remove any big globules of fat and neaten any ragged bits of skin. Now you have a spatchcocked bird!

• While the chicken is cooking, cook the farro in simmering water for about 25 minutes. Mix the balsamic and Dijon mustard in a small bowl, then whisk in the extra-virgin olive oil, hazelnut oil and maple syrup. Drain the farro well and toss with the dressing. It can be served warm or at room temperature.

• Mix together the mustard, maple syrup and thyme leaves. Brush this all over the chicken, saving a little to apply before the end of roasting time.

• Sauté the onion in the olive oil over a medium-high heat until golden brown and soft. Add the garlic and ginger and cook for a further minute. Add this to the farro.

• Season and lay the chicken flat in a roasting-tin, breast-side up. Roast for 30 minutes, then spoon the rest of the maple mixture on top and return to the oven for a further 15 minutes.

• When the chicken is ready and the farro has cooled a little add the leaves and pecans to the farro and season well to taste. Cut the chicken into pieces and serve on top of the farro surrounded by the figs.

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Slow roasted fennel pork with confit shallots Serves 8 1kg round shallots 1 tbsp fennel seeds, gently crushed with a pestle and mortar olive oil 2.5kg joint boned and rolled pork shoulder, skin scored 300ml white wine

• Heat the oven to 150˚C / 300˚F / gas mark 2.

• Put the shallots in a large bowl and pour a kettle of boiling water over them. Leave until cooled then peel, leaving them whole.

• Mix the crushed fennel seeds with 1 tsp each of salt and ground black pepper and 3 tbsp olive oil.

Rub all over the meat and skin of the pork.

• Put the shallots in a roasting tin and sit the pork on top. Pour in the wine around the pork. Cover the whole tin with a double sheet of foil and cook for 4 hours.

• Take off the foil and turn the oven up to 200˚C/400˚F / gas mark 6.

• Re-cover the shallots around the pork loosely with the foil but leave the pork itself uncovered. Put back in the oven for another hour or until the crackling is golden and crisp.

You can take the foil off the shallots for the last 20 minutes to get a little colour if needed.

• Serve the pork with the shallots and the pan juices alongside roast potatoes, greens and apple sauce.

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Roast beef with red wine gravy

Serves 6 Rib of beef, chine bone removed olive oil 8 shallots, halved and peeled A few sprigs of thyme

1 tbsp flour 350ml red wine 300ml beef stock 2 tsp redcurrant jam

• Heat the oven to 220˚C/420˚F/ gas mark 7.

• Season the beef thoroughly. Heat a heavy roasting tin on the hob and add a little oil. Sear the beef all over until you have a good colour.

• Add the shallots and thyme to the roasting tin then roast for 30 minutes.

• Turn down the oven to 160˚C/ 320˚F/gas mark 3. Keep cooking the beef for 15 minutes per 450g for medium-rare.

• Take out of the tin and rest for at least 40 minutes under foil.

• Put the roasting tin on the hob, sprinkle in the flour and stir everything well. Add the wine, beef stock and redcurrant jelly and simmer till reduced by half.

• Strain into a jug to serve with roast potatoes,Yorkshire pud and veg.

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Stuffed roasted squash with pesto 1 large butternut squash, about 1.5kg (3lb) 100g (3 ½oz) flat-leaf parsley, 2 tbsp finely chopped, the remainder roughly chopped 2 x 285g (9oz) jars charred roasted peppers in oil, drained well and all oil reserved 1 onion, chopped 200g (8oz) button mushrooms, sliced 180g (6 ½oz) ready-cooked (vacuum-packed) whole chestnuts 2 garlic cloves, chopped ½ tsp paprika 8 thyme sprigs 200g (8oz) spinach leaves

• Use a fork or potato masher to break the chestnuts down a little.

They should be lightly crushed rather than completely broken down. Add the crushed chestnuts, 2 chopped garlic cloves, paprika and the leaves from 2 thyme sprigs to the pan. Cook through for a minute. Stir in the scooped-out squash, stirring to mix and to break it down evenly. Season well, stir in the finely chopped parsley and remove from the heat.

For the pesto 3 garlic bulbs, halved through their middles 1 red chilli, seeded and roughly chopped 100g (4 oz) pecans, lightly toasted

• Use the drained, chargrilled peppers to line the hollowed out squash halves in an even, single layer. Divide the mushroom and chestnut mixture between the halves, pressing it down evenly.

Evenly spoon the spinach over the filling in one half of the squash.

Put the two halves together to make a butternut squash shape and tie together several times along the length of the squash with kitchen string. Return to the roasting tin.

• Preheat the oven to gas 5, 190°C, fan 170°C / 370˚F. Halve the butternut squash vertically and scoop out the seeds with a soup spoon or melon baller. Line a roasting tin large enough to hold both squash halves with nonstick baking paper. Put both halves, cut sides down, in the roasting tin and roast for 50 minutes, or until just tender.

• Leave to cool for 15 minutes, then carefully turn the halves over and scoop out the insides along the length of each squash half, leaving an even, 3cm border of squash all around the edge. Be careful not to pierce the skin. Reserve the scooped-out squash and season the hollowed-out halves with salt and pepper.

• While the squash halves cook, put 2 tablespoons of the oil from the jarred peppers in a large saucepan set over a medium heat. Add the chopped onion and cook gently for 8 minutes or so, stirring often, until soft and just starting to colour. Now add the mushrooms and cook for 5 minutes until browned and soft, stirring often.

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• Separately, wash the spinach and drain well. Transfer to a large saucepan and wilt over a medium heat, stirring often. It should take 2-3 minutes for the leaves to collapse. Wring out in a clean tea towel to remove excess moisture then season well with salt and pepper.

• Bake for 20 minutes, then add the halved garlic heads to the tin with the remaining thyme sprigs, drizzling them with 1 tablespoon oil from the pepper jars. Bake for a further 30-40 minutes, until the squash is completely tender and piping hot.

• To make the pesto, squeeze out the cloves from one halved garlic bulb and add to the small bowl of a food processor with the red chilli, pecans and the roughly chopped parsley. Blitz together, pausing to scrape down the sides. With the motor running, add the remaining oil reserved from the pepper jars in a steady stream. A rough pesto will form. Season with salt and pepper, to taste.

• Slice the squash thickly, discarding the string, and serve with the pesto on the side and the garlic bulbs to decorate.

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Lovingly handmade Jewellery by Lilly Jewellery in Bury St Edmunds, Suffolk

I fix and alter pre existing jewellery as well as making new, beautiful jewellery and can make something unique for your exact requirements. Perfect for special events and gifts for everyday. www.facebook.com/ Jewellerybylilly/ www.consciouscrafties.com/ Crafties/jewellery-by-lilly/ lillyladd@outlook.com 07899 843235

Jacqui Warren C.I.H.P Certs Couns. (UKCHP)

PSYCHOENERGIST

Learning & Development Consultant

“To enable every person and every company to have a strong positive sense of self; ensuring all personal and customer journeys are the most fulfilling experiences possible”

Personal development is a priceless • Change how you think Change your life investment which once made, should go • Integrate Personal Development on rewarding you for the rest of your life. and Growth Reflections unique Mindful Transformation & Self Management approach is organic so • Stop Repetitive Patterns of Negative Behaviour ensures exactly that. By achieving this new • Regain your Self-Confidence perspective and improving your Emotional • Unleash Unused Potential & Intelligence enables you to make better Resources choices and decisions: • Psychic/clairvoyant Readings www.psychoenergy.co.uk | Email: jacquiwarren@psychoenergy.co.uk Telephone: 01255 852646 | Mobile: 07932 984477

Sarah Shackell’s Children’s Parties Sarah will provide a unique, fun and professional party experience for any child’s occasion. From Superhero to Halloween themed parties Sarah can do it all. Sarah can give that extra special experience that your child and their friends will not forget.

childrenspartyshack 07969623416

Join the Acti Buzz with Sian @ All Things Acti!

Weight Loss Inch Loss Skin Care Make Up Hair Care Tooth Whitening Why not turn your passion in to a pay check and join us as an Acti-Labs Ambassador.

Temporary/part time/full time opportunities available all year round, with full training and support from the start!

Contact Sian today for business opportunities or product queries: E: actidermbysian@yahoo.co.uk T: 07720603492 www.joinsiansquires.co.uk

Please visit www.siansquires.co.uk for full product range.

Silver Crescent Hand Made Jewellery • Imported Jewellery • Repairs Alterations • Cleaning • Re-polishing

+44 7951156744 www.facebook.com/silvcres

Fancy a girlie weekend away with no cooking or cleaning?

I arrange group retreats in beautiful houses so you can have the rest and fun you deserve. Contact ‘Life Escapes Norfolk’ for more information https://www.facebook.com/Norfolkcateredbreaks/ Also available- Readings (in person or online), Reiki Treatments, Group Meditations and Psychic Development.

All can be added to retreat packages

Susan Fisher Portraits

I am a Graphite and Pastel Portrait Artist who takes commissions by painting from peoples photos of their beloved pets or a loved one.

I can bring the photos to life with photographic precision.

Susan Fisher Portraits

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your candle. A slight overlap of the napkin around the candle shouldn’t pose too much of a problem but you will want to keep it as minimal as possible for ease.

DECOUPAGE

CANDLES

4. Next, roll the candle with the napkin around it tightly in greaseproof paper and selotape secure.

5. Take your hairdryer and gently heat up the candle – don’t hold it directly on it as it could burn. This will take a little while, the idea is to get the wax to melt just enough to come through the layer of napkin.

It’s important to note before we start that these candles are not made with the intention of actually burning them – they are for decorative purposes only! These pretty candles make lovely gifts and are surprisingly simple to create…!

You will need: Decorative napkins Pillar candles – any size Scissors 6. When the wax has melted enough to shine through the napkin (you will have to check this by opening up the greaseproof paper every couple of minutes) use the dry paintbrush to smooth the napkin over the candle before it sets and remove any creases.

Hairdryer Baking paper Selotape Paintbrush Pencil 1. Separate your napkins so you are only left with the decorated layer. The other two layers can be thrown away.

7. Remove the greaseproof paper and voila!

Perfect pretty candles.

2. Roll your candle in the napkin making sure it is neat along the top, this will be where the pattern ends and you don’t want it to be wonky!

Remember, these candles are not intended for burning and are for decorative purposes only – be sure to pass this on to anyone you may gift them to! Take care when using the hairdryer for it to not overheat.

3. Mark your napkin gently with the pencil where you will need to cut for it to fit around

If you give this a go we’d love to see your pictures on facebook!

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Does this sound like you?

I can help you to look good and feel great.

SOUTH MILITARY CATCHMENT

You have a wardrobe full of clothes but feel like you have nothing to wear?

www.thomasinnewtonimageconsultant.com

A ngelic

Jewellery

A unique mix of fashionable and affordable costume jewellery, including silver plated and silver pieces.

Contact Sarah for more information 07919440065 angelic.jewellery

Angelic Jewellery

nathantodd@btinternet.com | 07916 135291

Add something unique to your event and make it a day to remember!

Billy The Barrel Train

Coral Moore Knitwear

01329 315615 | 07794 822659

FUSION OF ONENESS Direct Voice Medium, Psychic and Healer Awaken and Join in Oneness

My work as a Directvoice Medium & Healer, expresses all that we are. It connects with a physical ailment, bringing relief, a mental block of fear, an incarnation of events taken place previously, a link with a loved one who has passed away, encouraging strength, stability & guidance, healing old wounds.

All of these things create a pattern of thought which merges with love & humility. My team of spirit worker’s act out a part of this in order to connect with you. They will talk to you and establish a link which provides you with the right instruction. Great humor is displayed for your ease, especially from my ‘control’ Nick’. Member of the NFSH. As well as 1-1 appointments I also work wth Skype and telephone readings. If you wish, take a look at my website, details below.

Mobile: 07779478837 | E-mail: linda.silence@googlemail.com Website: fusionofoneness.com | MNFSH

Hot & Tasty Burger Van Based in Southampton but not restricted to, this high quality mobile catering trailer is available to hire for all types of events where hot food is required.

If you are looking for a high quality burger van to hire to attend an event you are organising then please get in contact on 07799 767710 or natasha@burgervan.net www.burgervan.net

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• Mobile discos with award finalist professional DJ’s • All occasions: weddings, anniversaries, birthday parties, company parties etc.

• Awesome lighting, sound and set-up • Unique dance floor camera and personal photo screens • Music request website • Personal contact with DJ throughout • Theming, ideas and related party services and equipment • Range of packages to suit your budget

Contact Andy to chat about your event.

07786 663223 or andy@redawnpromotions.com

www.redawnpromotions.com redawnp

redawnp

“From the moment we first talked, we just clicked and I knew you completely understood what my vision was and you’d do anything and everything to make it a reality. You’re just an absolute star!”

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>> FASHION LOOKBOOK

Simply Be Embroidered Green Parka £75

Marks & Spencer, Price TBC

DRY JANUARY George at ASDA Cream Teddy Bear Coat £35

New season, new coat!

Be ready for anything with biker jackets, trench coats, denim, faux fur, parkas and macs, we’ve got the perfect coat whatever the weather…

Matalan, Price TBC

V by Very Lace Up Biker Jacket £180

Evans Purple High Neck Coat £70

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Primark UK Denim Jacket £15

Debenhams Red Herring £45

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New Look Red Mac £39.99

M&Co Yellow Trespass Waterproof Coat £65

Marks & Spencer Limited Edition Coat £89

New Look Brown Suede Mac £44.99

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BACKPACKS

>> FASHION LOOKBOOK

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Oliver Bonas Imogen Suede Silver Backpack £110

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Primark UK Slanted Zip Blue Backpack £10

Primark UK Kissing Flamingo Backpack £10

Primark UK Embossed Backpack £10

Primark UK Exposed Zip Backpack £10 Cath Kidston Button Spot Patches Buckle Backpack £65

Folli Follie MISS FF £215

Debenhams Nine by Savannah Miller £75

House of Fraser, Price TBC

Primark UK Slanted Zip Black Backpack £10

Liberty London Paul Smith Backpack £360

TK Maxx Multi Leather Backpack £34.99

Primark UK Black Fluffy Backpack £12

Primark UK Grab Handle Backpack £12

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>> FASHION LOOKBOOK

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3

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Main image: Simply Be -Tassel Padded Balcony Bra £20 Tassel Thong £10 1 George at ASDA Grey Lingerie Set, Top £9, Bottoms £4.50 2 Debenhams B by Ted Baker £42 3 Debenhams Nine by Savannah Miller £31 4 Debenhams Reger by Janet Reger £65 5 Lovehoney Unwrap Me Black and Gold Lingerie Gift Set £29.99 6 Debenhams Reger by Janet Reger £28 7 New Look Bralet £12.99 Brief £5.99 8 New Look £16.99 9 Debenhams Reger by Janet Reger £38

Lingerie VALENTINE’S 

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>> FASHION LOOKBOOK

g n i r p

a t u P

S

p e t s our

y n i

Dune London, Osha £115

Miss Selfridge Floral OTK Boots £65

Primark UK Khaki Point Boot £20

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Primark UK PINK BOOT £14

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Simply Be Red Block Heel Ankle Boot £38

New Look White High Heeled Boot £29.99

Dune London, Sloanne Silver £170 V by Very Leather Studded Ankle Boot £55

Primark UK Floral Boot £16

Miss Selfridge Red Vinyl Rouched Boots £65

Miss Selfridge Blue Velvet Ankle Boots £25

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The wonderful world of needle felting It is now quite a few years that bored at a craft show, where there were too many jewellery stands and not enough customers, I bought a needle felt picture kit from the stall next to me. That kit proved to be a disaster and it wasn’t until I saw a brush felting mat that I decided to try again.

This was much easier and with a little perseverance I have developed the style I have today which I know is still evolving as I endeavour to try new ways of creating landscapes out of wool fibre. I frequently tell people it is as simple as applying paint to paper, in fact I think it is easier as long as you allow the picture to flow and the fleece to help create the picture with you.

Since I first started needle felting some four years ago the craft stall has grown and we are now exhibiting at Kirstie Allsopp’s Handmade Fairs at Bowood House (June) and Hampton Court (September). To celebrate this we are offering complimentary tickets to the first twenty people who book classes this year.

We are also pleased to visit groups or take part in craft fairs. I like to demonstrate making the pictures at the table and this proves popular with shoppers who like see how they are made. We also offer workshops and can give talks to craft and women’s groups.

Our kits provide all the necessary materials you need to create two pictures and come in two sizes. The taster kit makes two pictures approximately 6 cm square while the larger kit makes two pictures approximately 12 cm square.

Pictures are also available to purchase and start at £12.

To book classes or make purchases please call Pip on

Salisbury (01722) 710394 or email pipwhite1275@gmail.com we also have a web site www.pippaluk.co.uk

Meet us at Bowood and Hampton Court

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Cosy Corner Crafts Wool • Material • Haberdashery

Prices from £12 to £75 Kits £12 and £20 tools and fleece supplied

Crafts • Outdoor Accessories Knitting & Crochet Classes

Pippaluk Crafts are available for craft fairs, talks and workshops. Call for details or to book classes.

4 Fore Street, South Brent, TQ10 9BQ

01722 710394 / 077 1966 3004 www.pippaluk.co.uk email: pipwhite1275@gmail.com

cosycornercrafts@gmail.com

Josephine Chapman Hypnotherapy Accredited Hypnotherapist and counselling skills and Past Life Regression Therapist CRB checked Addressing your: Psychological, Emotional and Social issues through hypnosis, life coaching and NLP. Trance is a natural state that we enter in and out of throughout the day. It has been around for centuries and goes as far back to the ancient Egyptians, Sumerians, Greeks and Romans. Its use in the medical field throughout the centuries has been for operations, treating mental health and child birth.

Today its use is to treat a wide range of issues from relieving pain, weight loss, confidence issues to addressing deep seated problems that are holding you back.

My role as your therapist is to facilitate this state so you can accept positive suggestions to address your issues.

So let hypnotherapy unlock your subconscious mind to address your issues.

With sessions held in Truro and Exeter, the rooms are private, cosy, well lit and are close to public transport.

With a free thirty minute consultation face to face or over the phone. www.hypnotherapyincornwall.co/ Telephone: 07470978078 E mail: josephinechapmanhypnotherapyuk@gmail.com

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Needle Felt Pictures

07427 964240

I’m Julie and I am a Beauty Coach and Image Consultant at Styling For The New You and I am passionate about inspiring and empowering people to look and feel fabulous. It may be that you are starting or returning to work, working towards a promotion, a busy mum, dating again, planning a wedding or event or even as a present to yourself or a loved one.

Your colour and styling consultations with me will be a relaxed and enjoyable experience.

I also offer personal shopping and wardrobe planning, parties, workshops and Bespoke experiences. w http://www.juliebrooker.co.uk t 07854679999 e julie.brooker@icloud.com

• Aromatherapy • Reiki • Crystal Healing

HOLISTICS 07730 005086 • Trance Healing

www.facebook.com/eightholistics

www.lablingboutique.co.uk We source and import many beautiful and unique pieces from all over the world. We offer great quality for even greater prices always keeping on top of the latest trends and styles!

We are mobile and can be booked for Ladies nights, shopping events, fairs and markets, fashion shows and charity events.

Tel: 07854 195653 or 07854 430167 Email: paulandjo@lablingboutique.co.uk www.facebook.com/lablingboutique

Marilyns Creative Threads

Unique hand made brooches, cards and Textile collage using vintage fabrics and hand embroidery. Commissions undertaken. Workshops available. Please contact:

www.marilynscreativethreads.com Tel: 07758897216 67

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International Women’s Day International Women’s Day is a worldwide event that celebrates women’s achievements – from the political to the social – while calling for gender equality. It’s been observed since the early 1900s when 15,000 women marched through New York City demanding voting rights, better pay and shorter working hours, and it is now recognised each year on March 8th.

F

igures show that globally, women’s education, health and violence towards women is still worse than that of men. Rather than being affiliated with one group, International Women’s Day brings together women’s organisations, governments, corporations and charities from all around the world.

The day is usually marked around the globe by events such as arts performances, film screenings, workshops, talks, articles, rallies, conferences and marches.

With the recent Hollywood film industry scandal and 2017’s global gender gap report, in which the findings show us that gender parity is over 200 years away and won’t close until 2186, this year’s campaign theme is #PressForProgress.

On IWD, women across the world come together to force the world to recognise these inequalities – while also celebrating the achievements of women who have overcome barriers.

In celebration of International Womens Day, we’ve rounded up a list of the most influential books that have become game changers in shedding light on women’s rights, feminism, women’s empowerment and equality…

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The Female Eunnuch - Germaine Greer When Germaine Greer first published this book it created a shockwave of recognition in women, one that was felt around the world. Positing that sexual liberation is the key to women’s liberation, Greer looks at the inherent and unalterable biological differences between men and women as well as at the profound psychological differences that result from social conditioning. Greer’s thesis is that the “traditional” suburban, consumerist, nuclear family represses women sexually, and that this devitalises them, rendering them eunuchs. Published in 1970 it was received with mixed reviews, but by March 1971 it had sold out of its second print run. It went on to become an international best seller, has been translated into more than 12 different languages and is an important text in the feminist movement.

Lean In: Women, Work and the Will to Lead - Sheryl Sandberg Ask most women whether they have the right to equality at work and the answer will be a resounding yes, but ask the same women whether they’d feel confident asking for a raise, a promotion, or equal pay, and some reticence creeps in. Sheryl Sandberg’s Lean In is a massive cultural phenomenon and its title has become an instant catchphrase for empowering women. The book soared to the top of bestseller lists internationally, igniting global conversations about women and ambition. Sandberg packed theatres, dominated opinion pages, appeared on every major television show and on the cover of Time magazine, and sparked ferocious debate about women and leadership.

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My Own Story - Emmeline Pankhurst Emmeline Pankhurst was a British political activist and leader of the British suffragette movement who helped women win the right to vote. In 1999 Time named Pankhurst as one of the 100 Most Important People of the 20th Century, stating: “she shaped an idea of women for our time; she shook society into a new pattern from which there could be no going back.”

I Am Malala Malala Yousafzai and Christine Lamb The Story of the Girl Who Stood Up for Education and Was Shot by the Taliban…

When the Taliban took control of the Swat Valley in Pakistan, one girl spoke out.

Malala Yousafzai refused to be silenced and fought for her right to an education. On Tuesday, October 9, 2012, when she was fifteen, she almost paid the ultimate price.

She was shot in the head at point-blank range while riding the bus home from school, and few expected her to survive. Instead, Malala’s miraculous recovery has taken her on an extraordinary journey from a remote valley in northern Pakistan to the halls of the United Nations in New York. At sixteen, she has become a global symbol of peaceful protest and the youngest-ever Nobel Peace Prize laureate.

I Am Malala is the remarkable tale of a family uprooted by global terrorism, of the fight for girls’ education, of a father who, himself a school owner, championed and encouraged his daughter to write and attend school, and of brave parents who have a fierce love for their daughter in a society that prizes sons.

My Own Story is a classic autobiography of the English suffragette. The closing paragraphs of this book were written in the late summer of 1914, when the armies of every great power in Europe were being mobilised for savage, unsparing, barbarous warfare - against one another, against small and unaggressive nations, against helpless women and children, and against civilisation itself. A corner stone of women’s rights and a mustread for anyone who wants to understand the movement.

We Should All Be Feminists - Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie What does “feminism” mean today? That is the question at the heart of ‘We Should All Be Feminists’, a personal, eloquently-argued essay - adapted from her muchviewed TEDx talk of the same name. With humour and levity, here Adichie offers readers a unique definition of feminism for the twenty-first century - one rooted in inclusion and awareness. She shines a light not only on blatant discrimination, but also the more insidious, institutional behaviours that marginalize women around the world, in order to help readers of all walks of life better understand the often masked realities of sexual politics. Throughout, she draws extensively on her own experiences in the U.S., in her native Nigeria, and abroad, offering an artfully nuanced explanation of why the gender divide is harmful for women and men, alike.

I Know Why The Caged Birds Sing - Maya Angelou Sent by their mother to live with their devout, self-sufficient grandmother in a small Southern town, Maya and her brother, Bailey, endure the ache of abandonment and the prejudice of the local “powhitetrash.” At eight years old and back at her mother’s side in St. Louis, Maya is attacked by a man many times her age— and has to live with the consequences for a lifetime.Years later, in San Francisco, Maya learns that love for herself, the kindness of others, her own strong spirit, and the ideas of great authors will allow her to be free instead of imprisoned. Poetic and powerful, I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings will touch hearts and change minds for as long as people read.

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Not That Kind of Girl: A Young Woman Tells You What She’d “Learned” - Lena Dunham Fearless, smart, and as heartbreakingly honest as ever, Not That Kind of Girl establishes Lena Dunham as more than a hugely talented director, actress and producer - it announces her as a fresh and vibrant new literary voice.

SOUTH MILITARY CATCHMENT

These are stories about getting your butt touched by your boss, about friendship and dieting (kind of) and having two existential crises before the age of 20. Stories about travel, both successful and less so, and about having the kind of sex where you feel like keeping your sneakers on in case you have to run away during the act. Stories about proving yourself to a room of 50-year-old men in Hollywood and showing up to “an outlandishly high-fashion event with the crustiest red nose you ever saw.”

Recruiting Now! http://sheilahowell.myforever.biz/ Working with Forever is a really exciting opportunity as it offers more time and freedom and helps me to achieve my potential. Please feel free to take a look through the website and magazines and get in touch if you need to know more.

How else can you get involved in International Womens Day? 1. Make a pledge for parity To do this you need to go to the International Women’s Day website and pledge to help women and girls achieve their ambitions, call for genderbalanced leadership and create flexible cultures.You could pledge to challenge bias and inequality, to campaign against violence, or to champion women’s education.

2. Join in with an IWD event The IWD website shows where events are happening all over the world.

It could be a march, a run, a conference or even a tea party celebrating women around the world. Simply sharing your experiences online with the hashtag #PressForProgress creates awareness and facilitates change.

3. Host your own event IWD encourages women to host their own event and give a platform to a prominent female speaker if possible. Alternatively, hosting something as simple as a coffee morning or party to celebrate women, or even just creating a display to raise awareness in your school or workplace is enough.

Event packs are available from the IWD website and include banners, wristbands, balloons and bunting to decorate and create an exciting and professional atmosphere for your event or to create a display.

...the ity opportun

http://www.utilitywarehouse.org.uk/ N56504/opportunity

Join now and build your brighter future!

Sheila Howell | T. 07983060084 | E. reikicrystalhealer@yahoo.co.uk

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“Why me?”

“Let’s talk breast cancer” Sharon Curry, coach and META-Health practitioner, explains how the beliefs we hold, which are often outside conscious awareness, can result in stress and ultimately disease.

By understanding what your body is trying to tell you, you can set yourself free, and blossom into the woman you were meant to be.

Sharon Curry was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2010, and this led her on to her own journey of self-discovery.

Sharon left the pharmaceutical industry to train as a coach and is now passionate about empowering women after breast cancer.

“As a woman I’m supposed to put others first...”

As women, we often develop a number of beliefs about ourselves and the world by observing our parents, as children. If you talk to nurses who see breast cancer patients on a daily basis, they will tell you that they often see similar traits in their patients, who have a tendency to: • put others first • have poor personal boundaries • think that they are not “good enough” • have a fear of being abandoned by loved ones Beliefs lead to thoughts, emotions and behaviours.

When these beliefs are supportive, we lead a healthy life, whereas the opposite is true when we have unhelpful beliefs.

META-Health is a diagnostic tool that looks at the mind-body connection, and helps a practitioner identify the specific triggers, emotions and beliefs that have contributed to emotional stress within a person’s body.

As humans, we react to events, based on our perception of those events, and our perception is directly influenced by our beliefs. If an event leads to a high level of emotional stress, our body will eventually adapt to protect us…. The resulting symptoms are what we call illness or dis-ease.

Have you been affected by an emotional life event in the last 12-18 months?

Often our beliefs are outside conscious awareness, so a META-Health practitioner will act as an explorer, working with you, to uncover the beliefs that may have been locked away since childhood.

Unlocking these beliefs can help reduce the risk of an illness returning, give you a better understanding of what may have contributed to your illness, and help you to realise what steps to take towards healing and personal growth.

In 2014, my own META-Health session opened up a can of worms, but it helped me to understand “me”.

Using META-Health, I started to understand the path that my life had taken, why I had never felt truly at ease with myself, and why I had always put others first, at the expense of my own health.

Things really started to change following META-Health. I can truly say that it helped me to overcome my anxiety about the breast cancer and started me on my journey to leading a life that was authentic and unique to me.

So, if you are asking yourself “Why me?”, you might want to also ask what your body is trying to tell you.

6 Step BeYou Programme As a result of the challenges that I faced after my breast cancer diagnosis, I decided to put together the 6 step “BeYou programme”. I understand how you are feeling and the programme provides the reassurance and support that you need right now, when you are feeling isolated, tired and unsure about the future.

The BeYou Programme will empower you to uncover the real you and from this position of power and authenticity, help you to create the life that you really want, whether that involves going back to your current lifestyle or venturing out in a new direction. You will feel more in control, able to make your needs a priority, and be less worried that the cancer might come back.

The Programme will accelerate your personal growth and help you to embrace the woman that you are … Authentic, beautiful and uniquely you.

Although my coaching involves a META view of your health situation, the programme has been created from my personal experience and should not be taken as advice or seen as a substitute for the professional advice of a qualified medical practitioner.

I am not a licensed health care professional and the services that you receive are from a practitioner trained in NLP, Time Line Therapy®, EFT, META-Health and Hypnosis.

When you decide to work with me, I encourage you throughout our time together, to work with your doctor and healthcare provider. If in doubt, always consult a qualified health professional.

If you would like to know more, I offer a free no obligation exploration session at www.sharoncurry. co.uk or you can contact me on 07712 159783/info@ sharoncurry.co.uk.

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Seikhem and Metamorphic Technique.

Reiki Portsmouth My name is Vivienne MacDonald and I have been practicing Reiki for several years now, I run a Reiki club in Portsmouth on most Friday nights at Buckland Community Centre.

I have always been interested and drawn to the unusual, such as ghosts, spiritual things and the unexplained and am an avid lover of nature, animals and people. My background is in Nursing and I have always wanted to help people get better as that is my nature.

I discovered my ability to heal when I was at work and a patient that I was looking after did not seem to respond to the pain control that we were giving him, and at a point of desperation to help him I placed my hands on the site of his pain. In my head I asked the universe that his pain be taken away

and that he could be pain free, and become calm and peaceful. I stayed with him for as long as I felt he needed it and when he did look better and calmer I then went back to go about my work. A few days later the gentleman thanked me and said that after I had put my hands on him he had not felt that pain again and I was gobsmacked and moved all at the same time that I had actually been able to help him.

Another patient that I had been helping to sit up in bed had said that my hands felt really warm and he wanted me to hold my hands on his back for a minute as it was easing his back pain, which I did.

It was after these two events that I started looking into become a healer and I then sought out a teacher and studied to a Reiki 3 Master level. I also studied

I joined the Reiki Portsmouth club and started to help the founder Roger to run the club and treat people who came on a Friday night. I have gradually taken over the running of the club as Roger has retired and although he occasionally gives treatments he predominately undertakes the training of anyone who is wanting to learn Reiki.

The club it self is open from 6pm – 9.30pm and works on a basis where people can come and will receive treatments, so there are no appointments made as those waiting can relax with refreshments in a calm atmosphere and talk to others there whilst waiting or they can sit quietly if they prefer. We also have someone who practices Indian head massage and so there are several types of treatments that can be offered to those who come.

There is more information about Reiki Portsmouth on our Facebook page, prices and contacts are also listed there.

I currently have a website under construction and hope to have this operational by the end of the year.

I realise that I have not really talked about what Reiki is or the other treatments as I have had varying levels of scepticism when I talk to people about it. There are those who think it is a ‘load of rubbish’ and it is true that there is no physical evidence

that you can see, so to some degree it is what an individual person believes.

I often tell people who have never tried it to have it and then decide as at most you will see things in your mind in your own thoughts and you may even hear and feel physical sensations too. As a healer I often get impressions from people too of their current state, and I can let the person know those if they wish.

(I believe this helps with someone’s emotional healing and have even had people cry whilst having a treatment).

For others who do not get things I have described it as at very least you will have a lay down in a calm environment where they can have a bit of ‘Me time’ away from the hamster wheel and just have some time to recharge enough to take it all on again.

I would encourage people to try it and if they do not like it then they need not have it again, although at the club we do have our regular people who come back every week so it definitely works for some.

This is a small insight into myself and the Reiki Portsmouth club and I hope this is caused a spark of interest into coming to find out more about it. I have also done work with two Portsmouth Substance misuse groups and have done home visits as well.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Vivienne MacDonald

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A new regular feature is in the works for our readers! John Colenutt, a psychic medium based in Catterick has kindly agreed to answer any questions and offer his advice to our readers that may have things that go bump in the night!

John explains what he does, and if you have anything you’d like to ask him, read on for details of how to get in touch!

PARANORMAL CORNER 74

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John Colenutt

09/01/2018 14:15

I

’m sure many of you have read my last article about a paranormal investigation we did awhile back.

So now, I hope this will give you all an insight into my work as a rescue medium. When I started out as a professional medium over 25 years ago, people started contacting me, asking for help with the problems they were having related to the paranormal and hauntings, not only in their homes, but also in lots of other places. Over the years, I’ve investigated stately homes, estates and castles, to name just a few.

So, make yourself comfortable as we delve into my world as a rescue medium...

The actual process of rescue mediumship in itself, is really helping trapped spirit people on our side of life, to make the transition to spirit world. People that pass can sometimes remain on the earth plane for many reasons... they are scared, maybe they can’t cross over, or they were taken that quickly from their body and don’t know what has happened. This is where I come in to give a helping hand.

I’ll explain how I deal with spirit people that can be easily helped and those that are a little more difficult to remove, including negative energies, poltergeists and even demons! When I first make contact with a spirit person, I like to try and find out their name, if they wish to give it to me, their age, what they passed of and roughly the year of passing.

Some spirit people are willing to give this information and some find it difficult to do so. I then get more of a feeling about them, such as emotions and whether they need help to cross over. At times a spirit person will give me the feeling of a pain in my body, which helps me to see the cause of passing. At this point it’s not unusual for more emotions to start to flood in.

If I feel they would like to pass, and a spirit person will make this very clear, the rescue can begin. I connect with the higher spirit energies that I work with, also my spirit guides, asking for help to take the person over to the spirit side. I then bring in, what I refer to as ,“the white light.” This is really pure spiritual energy which envelopes the person ready to help them make the final transition.

Usually the spirit person is happy to walk into the light, but occasionally they need

some gentle persuasion. I ask them to do this, as they will find love and comfort in the light and will now be safe. Once the person feels comfortable in the light, I then ask the higher spirit energies to take the person across. When they have crossed, I always have the feeling of relief and inner peace, knowing that person is now on the spirit side of life.

Now we come to dealing with the more “difficult and malevolent” energies that I encounter from time to time…

or not “. It sounds quite extreme, but sometimes it’s the only way to remove a very negative energy.

Basically, I tell it to go, it’s not wanted here, and it has no right to cause problems.

If there is no reaction, then, I will repeat this over and over, raising my voice if necessary. The use of white sage is very good and I always use it when dealing with negative energy removal.

Some energies will become aggressive and react to my voice, to remain strong and not to back down are very important things This side of my rescue mediumship can be because the moment difficult, challenging my guard drops, then and in some cases very it’s game over. With dangerous, as when I “Some energies will being persistent, the enter a property with become aggressive and negative energy will reported poltergeist react to my voice, to go... but it does take activity, I really don’t a fair amount of my know what I’m going remain strong and own energy and every to encounter. I must not to back down are time I deal with these admit, it’s part of my spirits it tends to chip mediumship that I very important things away at me. do enjoy doing and because the moment I always do my best my guard drops, then I’ve never been in a to help the people position where I’ve involved. My belief is, it’s game over.” not been able to if someone contacts remove a negative me about extreme energy and every activity, then once I’m removal has been successful. I never involved, I won’t walk away and leave that underestimate the power of the paranormal, person or even a family in distress. because one day I might encounter When I go to investigate poltergeist activity, something that’s much stronger than me.

I always make sure that I’m fully protected.

John Colenutt is our resident Ghost I do this by asking my spirit guides to keep Buster here at Just For Her! He is based in me safe and provide a barrier of protective Catterick and has worked using his gift as light around me. a psychic medium to help with paranormal investigations in many settings, including Firstly, I try and make contact with the with military families in haunted married negative energy to find out what it is and quarters and at other military locations its reason for being there. A negative energy experiencing paranormal activity. will either make itself known or hide, as they can tell if a medium is present. If they have chosen to hide, then I like to “shake Do you have a question or a spooky things up” to try and get a reaction from it. situation you’d like Johns help with?

I do this by calling out and asking it to give Get in touch by emailing us me a name. A poltergeist will sometimes react by drawing close to me, playing on my rebecca@forcespublishing.co.uk or via our Facebook page: feelings and emotions, or even moving an object. @Justforhermilitarymag Assuming the entity makes itself known, I can approach this in two different angles. I can ask the higher spirit energies to bring the white light in to remove it or I demand that it leaves. In my experience, bringing in the white light is not usually very effective, so then I go with the second angle... “Then you are going to go, whether you like it

with anything you would like to ask and it could be featured in our next issue in our new Paranormal Corner column!

You can also reach John via his own Facebook page John, Psychic Medium or by calling him on 07763169418.

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We’ve come up with the definitive guide of must-do things and places to see in beautiful Britain before you kick the bucket…!

to

of

cd

The Great British

a

BUCKET LIST Admire the art at the Tate Modern, London

Contemplate life at Lyn Y Fan Fach, Wales

be

Famous for its modern and contemporary ar t, The Tate Modern M odern is not to be missed.

Bask on the beach at Botany Bay, Kent

As soon as the temperatures start to rise people flock to Botany Bay, Britains most loved beach.

This enchanting lake in the heart of the Brecon Beakons National Park will leave even the most hardened cynic in awe.

Eat an oyster picnic in Whitstable

Dine in the dark at Dans Le Noir, London

This famous restaurant is hailed as one of the best and most unique dining experiences in the UK. Dine in dark whilst feasting on a surprise menu and being looked after by blind servers, bar staff and chefs.

A thriving trade in oysters is central to Whitstable’s character and history. Grab yourself some from the fresh fish market at the harbour, along with a bottle of bubbly, for a homemade picnic of kings out on the town’s glorious beach with its pretty beach huts.

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fg m l j

Feast on Fish and Chips in Whitby Home to the famous Magpie Cafe, where fish and chip fans don’t mind queuing well out of the door for a seat. Standing on the quayside for 75 years, it serves 20 types of fish that it buys in fresh every day and is reminiscent of a cosy wartime tearoom; the perfect setting to enjoy a plateful of the region’s finest fish and chips.

k

What could be more romantic than a romantic kiss in a train station? One that takes place under the 9m tall bronze statue of The Lovers, London’s most loved train station.

Britains most famous festival, with fields of attractions to suit everyone, a weekend at Glastonbury should definitely be on your British bucket list.

h This beautiful ancient wood has been mentioned in writing for hundreds of years, with many myths and legends relating to hellhounds and hauntings. Locals still won’t go to the wood after sun down, and warn visitors to stay away after then too!

This famous 50ft site is a favourite spot for young and old alike to take the leap into the beautiful blue Cornish sea.

Kiss beneath ‘The Lovers’ statue in St Pancras train station, London

Go wild at Glastonbury

Hunt for the hellhounds at Wistman’s Wood, Dartmoor

Jump off a cliff in Portcothan Bay, Cornwall

Laugh at the Komedia Comedy Club, Brighton Brighton is famous for its comedy clubs, and this one is said to be the best.

n o

Make your own tea blend, Bluebird Tea Co, Nottingham

We brits love our tea! Try your hand at making your own blend with Bluebird Tea Co and sit down with your perfect cuppa.

i

Ice skate in Hyde Park’s Winter Wonderland, London London’s famous Winter Wonderland brings with it a fabulous open ice rink each year in the centre of Hyde Park, definitely one thing to tick off your British bucket list.

Night-hike at Black Down, West Sussex Hikes are a well-loved British past time thanks to our vast and varied countryside, but experience one with a twist when you go on one at night-time.

Observe the seals at Blackney Point, Norfolk

The best place to seal-spot in the UK, watching seals in the wild is a great place to get up close and personal with wildlife.

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q p t Quench your thirst at the oldest pub in Britain, The Royal Standard of England, Beaconsfield

This 900 year old pub is thought to be the oldest in the UK. Serving food and drink daily, sitting in this ancient watering hole is like stepping back in time.

r s Pub walk in the Cotswolds

There are so many pub walks to go on in the Cotswolds it’s hard to know where to start. Alternate between ambling through gorgeous countryside and relaxing in cosy country pubs... What better way to spend a day?!

Roll some cheese at Coopers Hill, Gloucestershire

Coopers Hill is home to the infamous cheese rolling competition, held each year in May. Go to observe or sign up to take part if you think you’ve got what it takes!

Treat yourself to a Cornish pasty and cream tea Probably one of the most loved foods in Britain, a trip to Cornwall isn’t complete without a Cornish pasty and a cream tea.

Stargaze on the Isle of Man The clarity of the sky and the almost total lack of light pollution makes the Isle of Man one of the finest places for stargazing in the British Isles.

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w u Uncover the secrets of Stonehenge

The famous stone circle is still shrouded in mystery, go see it for yourself and see what you think!

Wreck-dive at Scapa flow in the Orkneys

x y The adrenaline junkies among you will delight in Scapa Flow, one of the finest dive sights in Europe. The real adventure lies with a treasure trove of sunken vessels from the First and Second World War. Divers can explore the unsalvaged vessels of the German High Seas Fleet, including a handful of large warships and destroyers.

v z Visit a Vineyard, Earls Barton, Northampton

Vineyards may not be the first thing you think of when thinking of Britain but we actually have quite a few. One of the best is in Northamptonshire, with tours and tastings available at certain times of the year.

X-plore ancient castles

From the ruins of Tintagel Castle, Cornwall to the well preserved Warwick Castle, there are loads of beautiful ancient castles to explore in England.

Yell down the well in Mother Shipton’s Cave, North Yorkshire

Zzz at No Mans Fort, Solent, Portsmouth

A petrifying well, thought to be the only one of its kind in Britain, which is so high in mineral content it turns objects to stone. A favourite place to make a wish and to hear the echo of your voice, this enchanting place is a must see.

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Undoubtedly one of the most unusual places you could ever stay in Britain, with 23 luxury bedroom suits the only way tto o get to and from this 4 star hotel h otel situated on a sea fort is bbyy ferry.

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First there was camping, then glamping and now…

Champing!

Y

ou’ve likely heard of glamping, luxury camping with real beds, warmer tents, sometimes even aga stoves, hot water, tubs and flushing toilets! But new to the scene is Champing, sleepovers in ancient Churches!

So it’s maybe a slightly terrible name but what an excellent idea! There are currently 12 glorious churches across the whole of England and Orkney available to rent from 31st March – 30th September. The larger churches can accommodate up to 16 people, for stays from 1 night to a whole 28 and even come with the option of breakfast being brought to you in the mornings! You can take your pick from a variety of churches, big and small, old and extremely old. There are churches set in beautiful locations along riverbanks and moors and Champing is a great way of

staying somewhere divine with a difference for your holiday, and with great rates (no high and low seasons – just the same rate all season long) what’s not to love? Beds are all provided and the entire church is yours for the duration of your booking – no having to share with others even if you are a party of 2 in a church that could fit 16.

Bedding is available to hire for £25pp, so no worrying about bringing your duvet if you’re travelling from afar. For larger group bookings a discount can be applied for parties of 8 or more, making your stay even more value for money. Pets and children are welcome in all of the churches, and in case you were wondering, you don’t need to be religious to enjoy a stay, the Champing team welcome everyone from all faiths and encourage people to just enjoy the ancient architecture and peacefulness of the buildings.

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A kettle, crockery and cutlery, tea, coffee, hot chocolate, sugar and long life milk are all provided and you are welcome to bring your own food and alcohol, providing the food does not need to be cooked. Some of the churches are not fitted with an electrical supply, in which case battery operated candles (real flames are not permitted) and lanterns are there for you to use but as these buildings can get extremely dark you are encouraged to bring your own torches along too. Unsurprisingly, none of the churches have showers or tubs, and heating is only available in a few and is not usually switched on, but some have toilets and those that don’t have an eco-loo provided outside the building – a solar powered compostable loo which is hygienic and comfortable! Only two of the churches have running water so this is provided in others by means of water coolers. The churches used for Champing are no longer used for services or regular worship – part of the reason Champing was invented was to fund the upkeep of these ancient and historic buildings by the Churches

Conservation Trust and to give them a new purpose and lease of life – so you don’t need to worry about needing to be out early on a Sunday morning. The buildings remain consecrated and will always be a place for contemplation, tranquillity and peace but the space has adapted to the requirements of humanity in the previous centuries and Champing is just the latest chapter in this ongoing tradition of change.

So what can you expect when the large iron key is handed over and the heavy oak doors are closed? Whilst you won’t be raiding a mini bar or ordering room service, you have a whole ancient building to explore at your will. Have a go playing the organ, detox from technology reading a book by candlelight completely undisturbed, explore every nook and cranny, you could climb the bell tower, and marvel at the historic objects you might find. For instance, in St Mary the Virgin in Fordwich, Kent, which dates back to Norman times, you will find a ‘Ducking Stool’ which was used mainly to punish women by humiliation of crimes ranging from gossiping to witchcraft back in the 13th and 14th centuries. Champing is a great gift idea, and is a marvellous place to celebrate a birthday or other event with family and friends. Many of the churches are set in small villages with friendly pubs

and places to eat close by where you can chat with locals about the history of the town and the church you are staying in.

When you head back to your church for the night, you might expect it to feel a bit spooky but reviews from previous guests claim it is anything but, saying when they were tucked up under the duvets on their make shift beds, candle light casting a warming glow around them, that it is simply quiet and peaceful. Guests, in case you’re wondering are allowed to get up to whatever their consciences allow during their visits – and although Champing is not advertised as a romantic or as a couples getaway it’s certainly a very special place to spend the night with someone you love!

In the morning expect to wake up to sunlight filtering through stained-glass windows and the morning calls of the birds from the trees in the graveyard.

Whilst there are currently only 12 churches available to stay in, this has risen from originally being just 2, two years ago and the Churches Conservation Trust are hoping to add more in the future as they are currently in charge of the upkeep and restoration of over 300 unused churches.

If you think Champing could be for you, visit www.champing.co.uk for more information, rates and locations available.

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Madrid CITIES A TO Z

Madrid, Spain’s central capital, is a city of elegant boulevards and expansive, manicured parks such as the Buen Retiro. It’s renowned for its rich repositories of European art, including the Prado Museum’s works by Goya,Velázquez and other Spanish masters.The heart of old Hapsburg Madrid is the portico-lined Plaza Mayor, and nearby is the baroque Royal Palace and Armory, displaying historic weaponry.

I

n the last decade, Madrid has really revamped itself. Many of its museums have gotten bigger and better, and the centre of the city has smartened up with new boutiques, delis, cafes, restaurants and bars opening almost every week. It’s a perfect getaway for a culture rich weekend break, a romantic getaway or a longer, more relaxed holiday.

From hostels, villas and luxury hotels you will not be short of choice when it comes to deciding where to stay.

When it comes to things to do, you could spend weeks just visiting the three bighitter museums, but there are plenty of lesser-known places that are well worth visiting too. That said, even the best-laid plans tend to get forgotten after a couple of days as you slip into the swing of the city.

One place you definitely shouldn’t miss is the Royal Palace. The opulent 18thcentury palace stands on a strategic site with views across the countryside. Often

used for official events, it is cram packed with paintings, sculptures, tapestries and antiques.You can also visit the Puerta del Moro gardens for a leisurely stroll, followed by a visit to the Museum of the Royal Collections which has been built behind the palace and is open to the public year round.

For football fanatics a self-guided tour of the famous Santiago Bernabéu Stadium is a must, you will get to see the dressing rooms and the press room, walk down the players’ tunnel and out on to the pitch, visit the Presidential Box and have a look at all those trophies up close. Madridistas big and small will be in football heaven here!

Join in with the locals on Sunday mornings visiting Retiro Park. Originally the gardens of a royal palace Retiro is now Madrids main park and is home to a boating lake, cafes and various exhibition centres. It’s free to enjoy and is a great way to experience some local culture.

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la Blanca synagogue and San Juan de los Reyes monastery. The Avant high-speed train from Puerta de Atocha station takes 30 minutes, while the bus service takes 90 minutes from Plaza Elíptica station.

There are loads of day trips to choose from when holidaying in Madrid, one of the best is visiting the medieval city of Toledo. When approached from Madrid it is a spectacular sight. Located high on a granite hill and almost completely surrounded by the

Tagus river, it is packed with monuments, museums and churches. To experience Toledo as its most atmospheric, try to spend an evening there. Highlights include the cathedral, which was built between the 13th and late-15th centuries, Santa María

Segovia is another picturesque city, appealing for its medieval charm and a perfect destination for a day excursion out of Madrid. Like Toledo, a wander through its beautiful little alleyways, especially the Jewish Quarter, is an absolute must and so is a visit to the Plaza Mayor, the Alcázar, Segovia Cathedral, and the magnificent Roman Aqueduct dating back to the first century. Don’t miss its fairy-tale castle, rumoured to be the inspiration behind Disney’s Cinderella’s castle. And no visit to

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Segovia would be complete without a taste of its famous roast suckling pig. Segovia is only 30 minutes by the high-speed AVE train from Madrid’s Chamartín station.

Situated between Segovia and Ávila is La Sierra de Guadarrama, its hillsides include the Peñalara National Park, and the rock formations along the Manzanares River known as La Pedriza. The sierra is also a prime location for mountain sports, from skiing or snowshoeing in the winter to mountain biking and rock climbing.

The journey from Madrid to the Peñalara National Park involves two Cercanías trains.

First, take the Cercanías to Cercedilla from Madrid’s Chamartín station (the ride is around an hour and 20 minutes). Then take a 40-minute train from Cercedilla to Cotos, where one of the park’s three offices is located.

Another World Heritage Site is the beautiful town of Aranjuez. Aranjuez served as a summer palace and hunting grounds for Royals of days gone by. Its majestic architecture rivals that of the Royal Palace in Madrid and its magnificent gardens sprawling across 750 acres are worthy of an afternoon of exploration.

Aranjuez is a 45-minute train ride on the

Cercanías via Madrid’s Atocha station but for a truly authentic experience then take the Strawberry Train, made up of restored wooden carriages from the early 20th century. During the hour-long journey, you can sample delicious strawberries grown in Aranjuez itself!

If you fancy a spot of retail therapy during your visit to Madrid, there are lots of fantastic little independent shops to explore as well as larger chain stores. For funky boutiques the best place to head is Calle Fuencarral, just north of the Gran Via. Calle Augusto Figueroa is lined with outlet shoe shops. On Sunday mornings have a mooch

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around the Rastro, the sprawling flea market around Ribera de Curtidores near La Latina metro, but beware as pickpocketing is rife so stay vigilant and don’t take a bag if you can help it. The Mercado de San Miguel is great for tapas and a glass of wine, but also for picking up Spanish gourmet foods – perfect if you are self-catering and want to try your hand at cooking some authentic Spanish dishes.

No trip to the Spanish capital would be complete without tasting some of the fabulous dishes available. With more bars per capita than any other country in the EU, Spain is a treasure trove of possibilities when it comes to eating delicious food.

In Madrid, the sheer number of options can be a little overwhelming so consider joining one of the many food or tapas tours available. Cocido Madrileño is definitely one to get your lips around on a visit during the cooler months as Madrid’s own take on a traditional Spanish stew. It usually consists of a flavourful broth full of vegetables, chickpeas, chorizo sausage and pork, it is stewed for upwards of four hours creating a blend of heavenly, robust flavors that make for the ideal cure to Madrid’s wintry weather. And if seafood is your thing then you can’t go to Madrid without tasting the city’s most famous sandwich: the bocadillo de calamares, or fried squid sandwich. Madrid’s central Plaza Mayor is

“The Mercado de San Miguel is great for tapas and a glass of wine, but also for picking up Spanish gourmet foods – perfect if you are self-catering and want to try your hand at cooking some authentic Spanish dishes.”

the mecca for this simple, yet scrumptious sandwich. The most basic (and most traditional) bocadillo de calamares consists of crusty, fresh bread loaded with flourcoated, deep-fried rings of squid.

Nightlife in Madrid is conditioned by its climate. In the summer months it’s just too hot until the sun goes down to really do anything, and it’s not unusual to see families and locals at the park enjoying the swings long after the sun goes down full of energy from their afternoon siestas. For tourists, you can dance the night away in one of the many highly rated clubs, have an upmarket evening out at the theatre or unwind over a drink in relaxed bar.

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WALES MILITARY CATCHMENT

My mother-in-law gave me a pair of slippers every Christmas, even when she was over 100!! Christmas was no problem for her everyone got the same thing as last year and the year before….easy!! However, for those of us who want to choose a present that is thoughtful and welcome, and which shows you have gone to a little trouble, it gets a bit more tricky around this time of year.

Add to that if you have to give a present to a Baby or Toddler which pleases them, pleases the parents and reflects the fact you have taken trouble to get something which shows you care, it can be a real Christmas-time-challenge.

Here at Curious Fox Company we specialise in Treasure Baskets and Gifts (including stocking fillers) for little ones. We make up the baskets individually and we have a wide range to suit all tastes, including beautifully prepared Christmas themed ones. Based on educational research into early play, they are all collections of natural and everyday items, safe to play with and fascinating for early learners as they find out more about their world ….naturally. For an extra special ‘wow’ factor, a red/ green or cream /gold liner can turn it into a beautiful and unique gift for a First Christmas.

A Treasure Basket ticks all the boxes. Hand made, attractive, seasonal, shows that you have gone the extra mile to find something special for a special baby and above all, the baby will love it. Each basket has some guidance for the adult and has some advice on adding to it as the baby gets older.

So, whether you are a mum or a grannie, whether you have a niece, nephew or simply need a present for a friend’s baby, we think Curious Fox has the answer to your ideal baby gift!

Mary Horn Curious Fox Company www.curiousfoxcompany.co.uk Tel: 01905 756701 Email: info@curiousfoxcompany.co.uk

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