400 Life: It's about Family by Forsyth County News

400 LIFE

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s about family

Four share their stories

5 date night ideas close to home Parenting in a digital world One family serving up traditional Thai

DECEMBER 2019

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from the editor Around the 400 LIFE offices, families are getting bigger. In the span of three months, four employees will have welcomed new kids into their respective families, a remarkable coincidence. Mine is one of them. My wife and I have two boys, but our family of four might be a family of five by the time you’re reading this issue, depending on when you find it. Our family is rather traditional — husband, wife, two kids, dog (named Scout), house with a fence (that I had to fix last week). But neither my wife or I come from a traditional family. Ours were the blended variety, the proverbial his-hers-theirs arrangement that became more commonplace as divorce rates grew in the ‘70s. There were challenges, but also perks (extra presents!). In reality, families can work in a variety of forms. We found four families in Forsyth County to prove it. The stories of how they came together are different, but the answer to their success is the same: unconditional love. — Brian Paglia

inside

contributors Publisher Stephanie Woody Editor BRIAN PAGLIA Production Manager TRACIE PIKE Staff Writers KELLY WHITMIRE Staff Writers ALEXANDER Popp Advertising director nathan schutter Advertising deborah darnell STEPHANIE MCCABE STACY CLARK

Families of Forsyth

Four families. Four different stories. One common bond. Page 6 ONLINE Parenting in the world of ever-changing technology. Page 18 DATE NIGHT Try these 5 unique ideas for your next night out. Page 24 400 HOMES Schmidt Patterson Group strives for the best client experience. Page 12 400 EATS One family’s journey serving traditional Thai food to Forsyth residents. Page 20 400 FACES Sarah Pedarré knew she would work to help children. Page 28 400 READS Pick up one of these family-oriented books this month. Page 30

Photographer BEN HENDREN MICAYLA WISE Special contributors JENNIFER COLOSIMO REBECCA CAHILL

This magazine is a product of the www.ForsythNews.com

Advertising rates available upon request. Call (770) 887-3126 or email marketing@forsythnews.com December 2019 | 400 LIFE | 3

Family

fam·i·ly, noun: any of various social units differing from but regarded as equivalent to the traditional family

Here are 4 stories that prove that a family’s love isn’t limited to traditional notions The Keifer family Chris, Ranjani, Devin, Derik and Darin

Coming together: Chris and Ranjani met at a Halloween party in college in Illinois, and for Chris it was love at first sight. “I knew I loved her when I met her,” he said. “I just knew.” The connection was immediate, even though they came from vastly different backgrounds. Ranjani is of Indian descent and was born in Fiji. She lived there until her family moved to St. Louis when she was 8. She learned English by watching television shows with her siblings and cousins. Chris is white and grew up in a military family, but that upbringing — his family lived for periods of time in Guam, Turkey and North Korea — gave him a well-rounded perspective of the world. “That was probably the biggest thing I gravitated to with him, was just his open mind,” Ranjani said. Finding Forsyth: The two got married after college in 2001 and moved to Chicago a year later. While there they had Devin and Derik. The couple was expecting Darin in 2010 when Ranjani received a promotion that meant moving to Georgia. Chris quit his job as an athletic director at a high school, and the family moved to Marietta temporarily. In search of good schools and a safe community to raise their kids, Chris and Ranjani decided to build a new home in Forsyth County. They moved in 2011 and have been here ever since. Ranjani works for the federal government in downtown Atlanta, while Chris is now a teacher and girls lacrosse coach at West Forsyth High School where Devin is a freshman. Derik (fourthgrade) and Darin (third-grade) both attend Sawnee Elementary School. “All the things that we always wanted we got when we moved here,” Chris said. “Forsyth County has been amazing.” Family values: Every night, Ranjani tucks the three boys into bed and says the same thing: “Make smart leadership decisions.” It’s the foundation of their family, Ranjani says, and a quality that Chris finds lacking among today’s youth. “Me being a teacher, I see a lot of kids that are helpless,” Chris said. “They can’t take care of themselves. They can’t problem-solve. They can’t Continued on Page 6

4 | 400 LIFE | December 2019

The MILLER family Amber, Carol and Ava Coming together: When Louisiana-native Amber Miller got divorced in 2012, she had no job with a house to pay for and a 6-month-old baby to support. Luckily, Miller had a helpful neighbor: her mom, Carol. Carol was living just a few doors down the street from Amber and her daughter, Ava, at the time, but seeing their predicament, she bought the home, finished off the basement and moved in. “When you have a 6-month-old baby, you need help,” Carol said. “So, I just said I’m packing my bags, and here I come.” New routine: Over time, the new family unit found their roles in the home. Amber cooks and cleans. Carol gets groceries and tends the backyard. “I’m the messer-upper of the house,” Ava said. Carol is the early-riser, and so every morning she makes coffee for Amber and a glass of milk for Ava. Amber helps Ava get ready for school, and then Carol takes her to the bus stop. She meets Ava there in the afternoon when she gets home from school. The new arrangement had its growing pains, too. “I had to figure out who she was as a full-time adult,” Carol said. “I want [my mom’s] advice, but if I don’t take it that doesn’t mean I don’t love her and don’t respect her,” Amber said. “We had to come to some type of agreement.” They figured it out. Amber now has a thriving mobile tanning bed business. Ava is thriving at Whitlow Elementary School.

Carol enjoys pitching in any way that she can. There’s a lot of dancing in the house, and they take beach vacations together. “We call ourselves the ‘three Gs’ — three generations,” Amber said. Most wonderful time of the year: Amber, Ava and Carol love Christmas, especially the night before the big day. On Christmas Eve, Amber puts together a box of sentimental things: a key for Santa Claus to use to get into the house, food for Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer. They’ve already had pictures taken with Santa. “[Santa] said he wants chocolate chip cookies and milk,” Ava Continued on Page 6 December 2019 | 400 LIFE | 5

Miller family, from page 5 said, “and he wants carrots for the reindeer.” And they always read a special Christmas book that uses recordings of Carol’s voice to tell parts of the story. “That’s my favorite part,” Ava said. Values: In the aftermath of her divorce, Amber found a newfound intensity to her Christian beliefs. The three attend Browns Bridge Church, where Ava participates in UpStreet, the children’s ministry at the church. Carol and Ava say a prayer together on the way to the bus stop in the morning and another at night before bed. Out of their faith has come the family’s core value. “I think the main thing and what I always try to instill in Ava, especially growing up in the South, from Louisiana, is just always respecting everyone — your elders, your friends — and just treat other people the way you want to be treated,” Amber said. “Kindness,” Carol added. — Story by Brian Paglia, photos by Micayla Wise

Kiefer family, from page 4

make decisions. … We want them to be leaders. We want them to help the teacher, help the kid next to you [in class]. Don’t be selfish and only worry about yourself.” The couple have also instilled the importance of family in their three boys. All are involved in myriad activities. Devin plays piano and is on West Forsyth’s marching band and robotics and swim teams. Derik and Darin both wrestle, while Derik also plays lacrosse and Darin participates in theater. Everyone attends each other’s activities to support them. “They’re just all there for me,” Devin said. “I love them all.” Special connection: The Keifer family is really into special occasions. They regularly host parties for New Year’s Eve and the Super Bowl. Every Wednesday they go to Dave & Buster’s. The family loves the holidays, too. They always decorate the house with lights for Christmas. They have an egg hunt during Easter featuring a silver and gold egg that can have up to $50 inside. But the Keifers really shine during Halloween. Almost every year they turn their garage into a haunted house and dream up ways to scare kids. One year, Chris wore a mask and sat with a bowl of candy. When kids grabbed candy, a neighbor ran out with a mask on and a chainsaw (without the chain, of course). “I’ve never seen kids run so fast,” Chris said. It’s memories like those that the Keifer family treasures the most. — Story and photos by Brian Paglia Family, continued on page 8

6 | 400 LIFE | December 2019

The Ayers/Thomas family Pete Ayers, Anna Thomas

Coming together: Pete Ayers and Anna Thomas say that Boys Scouts and God brought their families together. Both have two teenage sons (Thomas also has a daughter who goes to UGA), and three of them had been involved in local Boy Scouts troops for years. Ayers and Thomas had different spouses at the time, but their families had been in the same Scout circle for years and never met. Ayers and Thomas eventually both got divorced, and two years ago their paths finally crossed at a Scout event. A year later, in October of 2018, they got married, and their families of three and four became a #partyofseven. One overwhelming challenge consumed their thoughts early on. “The first thing that came to mind is our food bill is going to be outrageous,” Thomas said. In reality, the couple knew they had a lot to work to bring the families together, and it required constant communication. As they constructed their new family’s ground rules, they based them on what each family had learned through Scouts and church. Oh, yeah, Ayers and Thomas had been attending the same church before they met. “We were just going to be respectful of our fellow Scouters, we were going to be respectful of the people around us, and also what they learned in church about ‘do unto others,’” Ayers said. The name issue: Thomas was cautious about the negative connotation of ‘stepmom,’ as well as crossing any boundaries between Ayers’s sons and their biological mother. “They have a wonderful mom, and I didn’t want them to think I was coming to take her place,” Thomas said. “I just wanted them to know I was partnering with their mom and dad to love them.” So Thomas met with each of Ayers’s kids individually and told

them they could call her whatever they wanted. “As long as it wasn’t derogatory,” Thomas said. Now, Ayers’s oldest calls Thomas by her first name. His youngest calls Thomas ‘Mom 2.’ “Which makes my heart soar,” Thomas said. Thomas’s sons call Ayers by his first name, though her 16-year-old introduces him to friends as “dad.” New traditions: This past fall break, the Ayers/Thomas family went on a cruise, and it unlocked a desire to travel more as a group. “We want to take a family trip out West this summer because our boys will be seniors in high school next year, and after that they’re off to college,” Thomas said. Ayers added, “We’ve made the decision that we want more memories than stuff. They’ve got enough stuff. Everybody’s got enough stuff. We want more memories.” Roasted: With a house full of teenage boys, it’s easy for banter to get a little edgy. And anyone present is fair game. “They all do it to each other,” Ayers said. “That’s really fun, when everybody’s roasting everybody else. Even girlfriends get in on this.” Ayers and Thomas wouldn’t have it any other way. “Days when everybody is helping out [around the house] and everyone is roasting, my heart is full,” Thomas said. She added, “There’s just so much love in this family that I never knew we could have until we got together.” — Story by Brian Paglia Family, continued on page 10

8 | 400 LIFE | December 2019

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The Coffey Family Mike, Sherrie, Zoe and Joelle Getting the family together: It took a lot of moving and circumstance for members of the Coffey family to find each other. Parents Mike, a New Yorker, and Sherrie, from South Carolina, decided after getting married they wanted to adopt children and adopted daughters Zoe, a 15-year-old student at Alliance Academy for Innovation, and Joelle, a 12-year-old attending Vickery Creek Middle School, from China. Though neither family has a history of adoption, Sherrie said she had wanted to adopt long before meeting Mike, a route the couple decided to go down while living in California. As they were planning to adopt a child on the west coast, the couple relocated to the Atlanta area for work, where they “started almost immediately” looking into adoptions and heard from a couple who adopted from China. “Zoe was born slightly thereafter, so we’ve always loved the story. We didn’t know Zoe at the time, but there was never a time that she wasn’t wanted,” Mike said. “We were planning this, all this stuff was coming together, but it took about seven months for that to happen. For Joelle, just a series of events changed and it took about three years.” Zoe, who is from the Jiangxi province, was adopted in December 2004, and Joelle, from the Hunan province, was adopted in April 2010. Keeping the culture: Keeping ties to Chinese culture has always been important for the Coffey family, even down to the girls’ names. Though both have western first names, their middle names are both Chinese. Mike said he and Sherrie wanted the names to have a meaning rather than just sound pretty and said Zoe Jia Li “means a good and beautiful life” and Joelle Mei Li meant “to reflect God’s beauty.” Another way the family keeps those connections is through groups of other families with adopted Chinese children, including a group Zoe has known her whole life. 10 | 400 LIFE | December 2019

“The girls that we try to meet up with every year, they’re actually the same girls that I was in the same orphanage with, so it’s a way to keep connections from China,” Zoe said. In adopted families, Gotcha Day, also known as Adoption Day, is the annual celebration of the day kids are adopted, and each year the Coffey parents have a gift to remind their kids of their heritage. “Sherrie was smart enough that when we were in China, to get something from China for every adoption day that is something from the heritage standpoint or as a reminder,” Mike said. Advice for others: The Coffey family said their path to becoming a family was unique and said anyone who is considering adoption needs to look at a variety of factors. “I think what I would say to somebody … just prepare in advance, and I would say, more than just obviously the paperwork and travel and stuff, prepare and understand how you need to parent them. It was a learning curve for us,” Sherrie said. “We parented them in the way that we were parented, but I think they needed something different. They needed more grace from the beginning. You can’t use the punitive, ‘I’m going to take away this or put you in time out.’” When they were considering adopting, Mike and Sherrie were told at their very first information session that one day their kids would ask why they decided to adopt, and they said others considering adopting should be honest about their motivations. “I thought that was a really great question, and we answered that question a long time ago,” Mike said. “We did it because we wanted someone to share our lives with, and we wanted to share our lives with our kids. “The wrong answer to that is, ‘Well we did it because we wanted to make the world a better place,’ because your family and your kids and your spouse are not ministries, they’re not projects.” — Story and photo by Kelly Whitmire

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he Schmidt Patterson Group at Keller Williams Community Partners was formed in 2015 when Kathy Schmidt and Dana Patterson first met and knew their vision for helping others aligned perfectly. Dana grew up in Alabama where she began her real estate career in 2006. She moved to Oregon before settling in Forsyth County in 2009. Kathy crisscrossed the states as her husband relocated with his employer, living in multiple places before settling in Forsyth County in 2006. Their experience of buying and selling numerous homes themselves provided them with a clear vision of the type of realtor they want to be and the client experience they strive to provide. The duo offers its clients expertise on the local markets and helps them navigate through the buying and selling process. They also offer staging consultation when needed to ensure their seller’s property has the absolute best first impression. 12 | 400 LIFE | December 2019

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“Whether it’s a $100,000 transaction, or $1 million, we want the client experience to feel the same.” — Dana Patterson, real estate agent for The Schmidt Patterson Group The purpose of having a team is so their clients can always get in touch with someone. “We never leave our clients hanging,” Dana said. Earl’s military background also fit well with The Schmidt Patterson Group’s vision to give back to the community. They have a special program designed to help veterans purchase homes. Their newest endeavor is a scholarship fund, which will be made available in 2020. After years of real estate experience, Kathy, Dana, and Earl understand the role of a realtor is more than just the dollars and cents of a deal. “This isn’t about money,” Dana said. “It’s about helping people.” Kathy added, “When you put people first, everything else falls into place.”

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READY PARENT ONE How families navigate a new digital age Story by Jennifer Colosimo

t gets no lack of heated debated in our community — social media: a good thing or a bad thing? What’s not so widely discussed is how parents (and their teens) can take responsibility for their answer. With a little smart family communication (one that doesn’t even have to do with what device you’re using), we can take steps as a community to make digital connectivity something positive, and beneficial. “Being a parent in this new digital world is incredibly overwhelming because things are changing constantly,” said Kristen Deuschle, district media specialist for Forsyth County Schools. “Parents can’t keep up with all of the new apps and websites, and that can be a scary thing for kids, because there’s no real break from that social anxiety.” Social anxiety isn’t on a list by itself, either. Excessive time spent on devices means less time doing schoolwork, staying active or spending face-to-face time with friends and family. It can lead to loss of sleep, depression and slipping grades, not to 18 | 400 LIFE | December 2019

mention the dangers that meeting strangers online brings. But there are ways to combat these social media stressors, and learning to play an active role in your children’s social media habits is the first step, according to Deuschle. Especially when that role isn’t about control and punishment, but about communication, honesty and trust established early on. It can be a game changer in creating a healthy balance from the get go. Deuschle equips parents with the tools to navigate their role through the website she designed as a resource to the school system’s Digital Citizenship Plan standards, a curriculum she also designed. “I talked with parents who were concerned about how they could monitor what their kids were doing online, and my talks at parents’ nights weren’t enough,” she said. “So, I designed a website called Digital Citizenship Tools for Families. It covers everything from cyber bullying and self-image to the healthy balance … basically tools to match each of the standards. Parents will

“I feel like if I wasn’t on social media that I would be doing so much more with my life. I wouldn’t be as distracted as I am right now, or as influenced by others. I feel like I would be my own person and have my own identity and not look to others for the right answers.” — Emma Harding, local teen on how social media affects her find videos, infographics, articles and more to help them navigate through this stage.” The website supports FCS’s philosophy on digital citizenship, which places value on the rich learning experiences that technology brings to the classrooms, but stresses that students must be taught how to use online resources responsibly alongside their parents and guardians. The core standards include the digital footprint and responsibility, online safety and privacy, creative credit and copyright and information literacy in addition to the aforementioned points from Deuschle. “There is so much information at the tip of their fingers,” said one Forsyth County parent, Hilory Harding, of the digital resources kids have today. “I like how we can communicate with our daughters, and vice versa, instantly about school, work, etc., making day-to-day communication easier for our busy schedules, but I dislike how it makes teens feel like they need to put themselves out there, which can cause self-esteem issues and add more stress than they already get at school.” The Hardings take a more hands-off approach now that their daughter, Emma, has had her phone for several years — but it wasn’t always that way. “It was understood from the beginning that we would have complete access to her accounts, but over time, it’s been very rare to find anything of a questionable nature. We reiterate all the time, once you put something online, it’s out there for the world to see and is next to impossible to completely remove.” Emma admittedly spends about six hours a day checking apps like Snapchat, Instagram, GroupMe and connecting with friends or checking in on school work. In fact, she said that if she wasn’t online, she’d be missing out socially and academically. “Social media has just become such a big influence on pop culture amongst teens that if you don’t stay up to date on the coolest TikTok dance or the funniest meme or even the latest influencer drama then you will struggle trying to keep up,” she said. “But I feel like if I wasn’t on social media that I would be doing so much more with my life. I wouldn’t be as distracted as I am right now, or as influenced by others. I feel like I would be my own person and have my own identity and not look to others for the right answers.” Another Forsyth County parent, Elizabeth Humphries, appreciates the way new apps like Life360 can help her keep track of her daughter, Emma Humphries, but reiterates that same sentiment — how easily it can negatively affect a young person’s self esteem. “The speed that information is able to travel and become viral in one click of a button scares me. One click can change anyone’s future for better or worse,” she said. “But, it makes me more aware of my children’s influences and who they are associating with. [We have] constant conversations around etiquette on various social media sites, and discuss how it can positively or negatively impact their future. I spend time monitoring their online interactions, which is something that I did not expect to be a part

of my parenting role.” But it’s an imperative part, according to Deuschle. “It’s about doing two things correctly — reading expert information and making family communication part of your plan,” said Deuschle. “I’ve provided the first part through the [Digital Citizenship] website, but the biggest thing is to communicate as a family. I like to promote family technology contracts, simply for families to talk together about how much time they should be spending online, and set parameters about uploading new apps, etc. Communication is far more effective than just putting controls on everything. An open conversation — where mistakes are OK — starts to establish trust.” She also recommends a few other rules, such as parents having usernames and passwords for all apps their teens are on, and establish rules for screen time as a family. On the website, there are safety tests and tips for parents, inside knowledge on what some of the latest apps are all about and ways to kick start these healthy conversations at home. There are some pros to social media, of course. It allows kids and teens to be creative in new ways outside of school, they can communicate with people their age and ask all kinds of questions they may not be able to ask face to face, and explore their interests on practically any subject. “Social media and digital resources have been able to inspire me and allow me to inspire others,” said Emma Humphries. “By being connected with friends no matter what, I have been able to help my friends get through rough spots, even if I could not be there in person to talk them through. I have also had people reach out to me when they knew I was dealing with a loss or something difficult and be there for me in that time. I have access to people who can build me up no matter what through social media.” Finding the healthy balance between accessing the pros and avoiding the negatives is where we get tripped up, but playing an active role as a parent is where we can start to take strides toward what the Digital Citizenship Plan calls a positive digital footprint. “I talk about social media and the Internet with my mom all of the time,” Humphries added. “She reminds me that if anyone I don’t know personally tries to follow me or reaches out to me online, I should come to her to make sure that person will have no access to any of my accounts or data. She follows me on all social media and if she has any concerns or questions about something I post, we discuss it and remove it if needed. We are always talking about ways to be safe and what is appropriate to post.” Deuschle compares the situation for parents as though we gave our kids a car full of gas but without any driving lessons. They’ve gotten deep into social media, but we haven’t taught them how to use it safely. With a little responsibility, some guidance from the experts and honest communication with our families, we can make the Internet safe “to drive,” and an inspiring place for this generation to leave their mark. To check out the resources from FCS’s Digital Citizenship Plan, visit www.forsyth.k12.ga.us/citizenship.

December 2019 | 400 LIFE | 19

400 eats

thai Basil Kitchen Fresh. Family. Authentic.

Story by Alexander Popp | Photos by Ben Hendren

Thai Basil Kitchen celebrates four years of serving traditional Thai food in Forsyth County

reshness, spice and family, these are the three ingredients that make Thai Basil Kitchen a Forsyth County favorite, year after year. Walk into the restaurant on Peachtree Parkway in south Forsyth and it’s easy to see, smell and taste these three ingredients at work. From the packed tables of friends and neighbors sharing a meal, to the dishes of curry and noodles bursting with flavors, the passion for good food is palpable. And according to Thai Basil Kitchen co-owner Nicha Pramrutairat, all of it started as a dream of continuing a family legacy for cooking authentic Thai food. “It was a no-brainer,” Pramrutairat said with a laugh, as she explained how both she and her husband had worked in Thai restaurants for years, when her father retired from owning businesses in Thailand and suggested that they should open Continued on Page 22 20 | 400 LIFE | December 2019

Everything we serve is prepared fresh to order, allowing you to enjoy the rich, complex flavors of our home at their finest. Sit back, relax, and enjoy the journey -- no matter the occasion, we’re sure to treat you to a cultural and culinary adventure you won’t soon forget. SPECIAL EVENTS AND CATERING Our restaurant caters for private events: weddings, business lunches, dinners, cocktail receptions, and more. We would love to discuss how to be a part of your next event. SEASONAL AND LOCAL We refuse to compromise on quality in our restaurant. That’s why we source our fresh ingredients from local farmers’ markets.

Experience traditional and authentic Thai cuisine made with farm to table local ingredients with spice levels that you can choose from including Mild, Medium, Hot, and Thai hot. Enjoy our outdoor patio or the new feature Chef table (minimum 6 people) special menu our chef creates just for you! Top off the whole experience with one of our famous desserts like the mango with black sweet sticky rice! Enjoy traditional meals like Pad Thai, Pad Kee Mao or Green curry. We also offer chef special’s like Thai basil lamb, beef short rib in Panang sauce and roast duck curry. Plus, try our award winning coconut cake that won 2018 Taste of Forsyth for best dessert.

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an authentic Thai restaurant together. “My husband worked at restaurants, like Thai restaurants, all of his life, almost 20 years and I was in the food service industry, working in the front of the house,” she said. “My dad saw how we were both in the restaurant business and he was like, ‘why are we not opening our own restaurant?’” Initially, the family thought that they would open the restaurant in Alpharetta, where they were located. But they realized that the closer you get to Atlanta the market for Thai cooking is more and more saturated with restaurants, so they decided to pick an area like Forsyth County to open up shop, where there was a real need for authentic Thai food — a need they were more than willing to fill. “We came up here and said, ‘Oh, we don’t really see any Thai places, so let’s go try to do our restaurant there,’” said Pramrutairat’s husband, Juan Carlos Flores Diaz, who also serves as the business’s chef and co-owner. “There are a lot of Thai restaurants in Alpharetta; you can find it anywhere,” Pramrutairat said. “It was fun to bring authentic Thai food to Forsyth County,” Flores Diaz said. Both Pramrutairat and Flores Diaz said that as soon the restaurant began preparing to open, they immediately began to see that their instincts were right, and people desperately wanted a Thai food option. Flores Diaz said that when they put up a sign letting the community know a Thai restaurant was coming to the area, they immediately started getting queries from people wanting to know when they were going to open. “That was a good signal,” he said with a small grin. “From day one, we’ve been lucky that it’s been constantly busy all the time,” Pramrutairat said. “People can taste the freshness 22 | 400 LIFE | December 2019

and how passionate my husband is about that he makes.” Today, Thai Basil Kitchen is much as it was when it started four years ago. Soothing music plays in the background as diners eat surrounded by Thai art, greenery and a large landscape painting. And after four years, Pramrutairat says that customers can expect the same authentic Thai foods, served in a family-friendly environment. “We try to stick to the traditional recipes as much as we can, because we feel like people don’t have to travel to Thailand to get good Thai food,” she said. “They just have to be here in their back yard.”

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December 2019 | 400 LIFE | 23

Date night in Forsyth!

5 ideas for getting closer as a couple, while staying close to home Yes, you’re juggling a lot these days: jobs, bills, kids, Netflix addiction. Today’s pace of life can be frenetic, and one-on-one time between couples can get lost in the chaos. But studies suggest date nights between partners are essential to the success of long-term relationships. For the longest time, Forsyth County residents assumed a nice date night required traveling to Atlanta, or at least Alpharetta or Roswell. But there are plenty of ways to spend some special time with your special someone right here. — compiled by Brian Paglia

All-in-one movie and dinner There’s no more classic date night than going out to have dinner and see a movie. But the new CMX CineBistro at Halcyon lets you do it all in one location! The 38,000-square-foot theater features nine screens and comfortable, reclining love seats. Pick your movie and your seat and then order a meal from the chef-driven American Bistro menu. Get there a little early and enjoy the CMX Stone Sports Bar, which has a wide selection of premium beer and wine as well as signature cocktails surrounded by multiple TV screens to watch various sporting events. More info: visitghalcyon.com/cmx-cinebistro/

We jammin’ You may think you have to go elsewhere to see live music. Well, you’d be wrong! There are plenty of local music venues in Forsyth County, starting with Rosati’s and Wild Wing Cafe. Rosati’s hosts local bands on Fridays and Saturdays, while Wild Wing Cafe offers live music on Wednesdays, Fridays and Saturdays. But they’re not alone. Halcyon has live music every Saturday afternoon. Good ol’ Days Bar and Grill always has a steady stream of live music as well as regular open mics. Ponce de Leon Music Center frequently hosts open mics and the occasional event. More info: myrosatis.com/cumming, wildwingcafe.com 24 | 400 LIFE | December 2019

Chuck an ax Let’s say things are a little tense around the house these days between kids, bills and jobs. Get some of that tension out by throwing axes! Big Bear Axe Throwing, part of the Xtreme Indoors complex at Country Folks Superstore at 2730 Spot Road, is North Georgia’s first ax-throwing facility. There are four throwing lanes, and each is monitored by an “ax master” for your safety. Lanes are $25 per person per hour, or book their “Big Bear Date Night” rate: $49 for two people, which includes $20 towards Dickey’s Barbecue Pit next door. More info: bigbearaxe.com Continued on Page 26

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December 2019 | 400 LIFE | 25

Date night in Forsyth! ... or day in this case Geaux for a bike ride Couples that bike together stay together! Seriously, one of the best ways for couples to improve their relationship is to be active together, and Forsyth County is THE healthiest county in the country with services like Geaux Bikes, a local pay-per-use bikeshare company. Bikes can be rented for $5 an hour, and all arrangements can be made from a smartphone app called BLOOM, which also provides a map, current speed and other information once the ride starts. The bikes even come with mounts for phones on the handlebars. The first location is at Fowler Park by the main trailhead entrance to the Big Creek Greenway. A second location is planned for Halcyon, which will eventually connect with the Greenway. More info: geauxbikeshare.com

Float together If you need to get a new perspective on things, get a look at North Georgia like you’ve never seen before. Balloons Over Georgia is the largest hot air balloon ride company in the state and based in Forsyth County, but there’s no telling exactly what amazing views you’ll get to see: Lake Lanier, Stone Mountain, Kennesaw Mountain, the Atlanta skyline or the foothills of the Blue Ridge and Appalachian mountain ranges. More info: balloonsovergeorgia.com

26 | 400 LIFE | December 2019

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400faces

Sarah Pedarré Executive director of Forsyth County Community Connection

Maybe it was inevitable that Sarah Pedarré would go into a career that helps families and children. The executive director of Forsyth County Community Connection was one of six kids growing up and started babysitting when she was 8 years old. “I’ve always been drawn to kids and family,” Pedarré said. Now, she has five kids of her own, as well as three grandkids, and works to fill in gaps in services for families in the community. Since Pedarré took over two years ago after 12 years with the YMCA, Forsyth County Community Connection has focused on the local foster care system, particularly supporting current foster families and recruiting new ones. Pedarré talked to 400 LIFE about building her own family, getting used to Cajun food and the biggest challenges facing families today.

What are the most important values for your family? “Definitely being there for each other. At the end of the day, we’re going to know each other the longest in our lifetime. Friends are going to come and go. But family is forever. So no matter what being there for each other. “Laughter is also huge. I think it’s valuable to be able to laugh at yourself [and] see the good in everything.”

What’s your favorite family tradition? “Dinner around the table. We all sit around the table and we give our best, worst and learned for the day. I think it’s important to have a pulse on the kids and what’s going on. “I should also mentioned that we have a ‘Pedarré Pig Roast’ every year over Labor Day. We even have T-shirts. I’ve been trying to stop it after the second one, but we had our 10th one this year. My husband, who is from Louisiana, always wanted to cook a pig. “Now we take up two yards in the neighborhood. I think my husband would love it if it turned into a community festival. It’s a lot of work, but it’s fun.”

So how do you like Cajun food now? “My heat index has definitely increased. I did not really have a palate for it before. But it’s a different kind of heat with Cajun food that I really do enjoy. We do a lot of seafood and boils. We definitely eat well. We have neighbors that show up and are like, ‘What’s for dinner?’”

What’s the biggest challenge families face these days? “Screen time and devices. I hate when you go out to dinner and you see a whole family staring at their tablets and phones. Or I’ll run on the Greenway, and there will be a mom pushing a stroller, and there will be a little kid with a tablet. I’m like, ‘You have this great, big world! Put the devices down!’ “And social media. I can’t imagine seeing all these profiles of people, and they have this persona of how great and wonderful their life is. I just can’t imagine what that must be like for the kids growing up. “Hopefully we’ll see a device-free wave coming through. It will be interesting to see this generation that has grown up on screens when they start having kids to see the direction they go.” — Story and photo by Brian Paglia 28 | 400 LIFE | December 2019

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400 reads Family is something we discuss all the time, but it can be hard to define. Do you need blood connection to be a family? What about biological family members you have never met?

with

Becky Cahill

there is no shortage of books that examine the importance of family. these books look at familial connections that define us through different lenses.

arisa de los Santos’ 2018 publication, I’ll Be Your Blue Sky, follows the stories of two women living in different decades. Edith is a newlywed in the 1950s and Clare is a bride-to-be in modern day. Edith and her husband have just started a new family when tragedy strikes. She must figure out how to create a new existence and decide who she will let in. Clare was raised by a single mother, but was sustained by an extended support system; a group of people she would never give up. Edith and Clare meet for the first time as Clare is doubting her plans to marry and as Edith is nearing the end of a long illness. The connection that is formed changes Clare’s life and helps Edith create closure for her own. The connection has far reaching consequences as Clare learns to find herself through the secrets of the past. The novel takes us through the twists and turns of each woman’s life. At its core, the novel is about the choices these two women will make, but it also examines what it means to be family and how the perception of family can change over time.

ani Shapiro is a journalist and author who has explored her heritage and family in a series of memoirs. In her latest effort, Inheritance, the author discovers that the man that raised her was not her biological father. What follows is her journey to locate relatives she never knew and to process through reorganizing her idea of her family tree in her 50s. Shapiro takes us along as she searches for answers about her paternity and uncovers long hidden events of the past. She grapples with retaining her sense of self when so much of her identity is grounded in the family she has always known. There are many contingencies to consider and Shapiro uses her journalistic background to write clearly and honestly as she overcomes internal and external obstacles. The author has taken her own personal experience and created the Family Secrets podcast. Shapiro and a guest discuss hidden events from the past and how uncovering these change the future and the perception of the past. Shapiro’s personal story moves quickly, but it is underwritten by the question of biology versus nurturing as the role of the family.

Becky Cahill is a career educator and an avid reader. She reads extensively in her free time and tracks her favorites (and those that aren’t even close) on her blog at tobereadlist.home.blog. Becky is the host of ‘Read It or Leave It!’ a weekly reading podcast available on Apple Podcasts and Spotify.

30 | 400 LIFE | December 2019

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