MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
LOCAL BAND FEATURES - REVIEWS - GIGS - EVENTS - INTERVIEWS - GAMING - MOVIES - LIFE(STYLE) - FITNESS - ART - TV - DVD - OUT & ABOUT - MOBILE APPS - QU
LITTLE SONGBIRD / RYAN MORCOMBE / THE EXTRACTS
LIFE(STYLE) / FITNESS / MOVIES / GAMES / TV / DVD / O&A
FITNESS WITH www.goguidemagazine.co.uk
T.O.D COACHING
CONTENT MARCH 2014 - issue (37) Contents
WHAT’S INSIDE THIS MONTHS ISSUE... SECRET LIFE OF WALTER MITTY (pg82)
- - - - - - - MUSIC - - - - - - -
- - - - - - - TV & DVD - - - - - - -
LITTLE SONGBIRD (pg4) THE EXTRACTS (pg10) RTYAN MORCOMBE (pg12) MUSIC QUIZ (pg16)
MOONE BOY (pg90) TRUE DETECTIVE (pg92)
New music quiz - answers on (pg120)
DVD CHART (pg96)
TOP 10 DVD’S THIS MONTH
WHAT’S ON GUIDE (pg18) What’s on in the local area.
DVD WALL - OUT THIS MONTH (pg97) Some DVD’s being released this month
- - - - - - LIFE(STYLE) - - - - - -
DVD REVIEWS (pg100) THE COLONY / R.I.P.D / JOHN DIES AT THE END / SAFETY NOT GUARANTEED / CAPTAIN PHILIPS MOVIE YOU MIGHT HAVE MISSED (pg101) MYMHM - FALLEN
WHO KILLED COMEDY ? (pg26) 5-A-SIDES (pg28) FEEDMENOW (pg32) PHONE APPS (pg34)
- - - - - - - GAMES - - - - - - -
ANDROID/iOS APPS CHARTS (pg36)
Our top 10 FREE and PAID apps charts for Android and iPhones.
GAME CHARTS (pg104)
Top 10 games across PLAYSTATION, XBOX and PC.
- - - FITNESS WITH T.O.D - - -
REVIEWS & FEATURES
CLUB TRAINING (pg40)
KNACK (pg106) THE LAST OF US: LEFT BEHIND (pg110)
WITH T.O.D.
- - - - - - - OUT & ABOUT - - - - - - -
- - - - - - - MOVIES - - - - - - -
O&A (pg118)
FEATURES
All the new releases in cinemas this month.
Out and about with some great indoor and outdoor stuff to get up to in the local area
This month its a new quiz - movie posters - answers on (pg120)
QUIZ ANSWERS (pg120)
MOVIE NEW RELEASES (pg50) MOVIE QUIZ (pg51)
THIS MONTHS BOXOFFICE TOP 10 (pg54)
Music and Video Quiz answers
CLASSIC MOVIE POSTERS (back page 122)
REVIEWS
12 YEARS A SLAVE (pg56) 47 RONIN (pg58) DALLAS BUYERS CLUB (pg64) PARANORMAL ACTIVITY: THE MARKED ONES (pg68) THE WOLF OF WALL STREET (pg74) HER (pg78) THE
We take a look back at some classic movie posters.
FEEDMENOW LITTLE SONGBIRD
Who are GOGUIDE...???
THE EXTRACTS
We try to ensure our information is correct before uploading but some details are subject to change. PLEASE check online or with each location directly for fully up to date information.
GOGUIDE is a local online magazine for the West Lothian area. We try to be less focused on local ‘news’ and more a targetted on, ‘what’s on’ or ‘happening’ in the local area. We do try to have a pretty modern approach to GoGuide content and eventually hope to produce articles on subjects outside our usual stuff such as Clubbing, Theatre, Internet, Sport etc.. With the vast majority of our content sourced from local contributors we are always on the lookout for new people to join us and help provide input to this content hungry mag so if you’re keen on writing stuff and getting it published in the mag feel free to drop us a message at content@goguidemagazine.co.uk
Page 2
RYAN MORCOMBE
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
J M RECORDINGS offers high quality, polished recordings at very reasonable price across ALL genres. Working with full bands, duo’s and solo artists is never a problem and there are special rates for multiple track recordings such as EP’s or Albums. For a quote please email me with your band name as the subject and include how many songs you would like to record, ideal recording dates and any website info. I also offer remixes, mastering and tracking services, please email for a quote. If required, drum tracks are recorded at a location/studio of your choice with bass,guitars and vocals all tracked and mixed at my Edinburgh based home studio.
www.facebook.com/jmrecordings www.soundcloud.com/jm-recordings
www.jmrecordings.co.uk bookings@jmrecordings.co.uk - JM Recordings - Edinburgh - Scotland MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 3
MUSICFEATURE
Little
SONGBIRD
Page 4
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
F
irst off Lynzie Dray’s persona, Little Songbird, is one of those artists who, like Morrissey did in the Smiths and beyond, seems to make every song tug at your self-conscious forcing you to really listen to it rather than having it on as background music. Even the happier stuff still has you just that wee bit on edge, as you’re not quite sure how things are gonna turn out in the end, and I do mean that in a nice way.
The songs currently on offer on LS’s YouTube page, strangely no BandCamp/Soundcloud etc…that I could find anyway, pretty much come at you from the same place, they tend to slowly wind their way around you, brushing your arm sometimes and whispering ‘semi’ sweet nothings in your ear with a dreamy wistful quality that pays a lot of homage to her proverbial mentors Mitchell and Joplin. But… scratch a little deeper though and you find that the songs mean a little more than you might first have thought, with titles like Grim Matters, Small Fears and Lonely Man you just know that there’s a good chunk of heart and soul strewn across those effortless verse chorus verse chorus meanderings. Despite have an awesomely sweet and original voice, that truly does seems to lend itself more to the more sombre side of things, I’m going to court a wee bit of controversy among the Little Songbird’ittes out there and say that things really come to light when Miss Dray starts to pick things up a wee bit and dare I say it, goes a bit more, well… rocky? Lonely Man is probably the most ‘produced’ track I’ve heard and is defo a side of things that shows off the Dray voice to its full potential. Across the board a really interesting collection of songs out at the moment making up the Little Songbird arsenal with my favourite being the haunting Small Fears. Again though, another local artist crying out for a good studio engineer to just add those wee bits of sparkle and magic that people too close to the music sometimes miss. Songs filled with honesty, purity and angst reminiscent of my favourite local genius Boletes. If you haven’t checked out Little Songbird yet then you’re in for a treat, and Miss Dray if you haven’t checked out Boletes you’re in for a treat too. https://www.facebook.com/littlefallensongbird http://www.youtube.com/channel/UCY1h_ MJ9StJMA4y2W6CWigA Mr Suit GoGuide Magazine Contributor
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 5
MUSICFEATURE
Little
GoGuide Magazine gets the lowdown on Lynzie Dray of Little Singbird
SONGBIRD Interview
GG: How long have you been at it?
LS: I have been playing as Little Songbird since I launched in September 2013, however I started playing the guitar in summer 2012
GG: How hard was it to come up with your name?
LS: I never actually came up with the name, I was attending a little guitar session, held in Howden House Hotel. It was one of the first times I’d sung publicly, after I’d done my set, the gentleman that ran the session came to wish me well. After giving me much confidence, he said ‘I’ll see you around Little Songbird’ - The name stuck
GG: What names did you reject?
LS: Lynzie The Mum That Can Strum (lol)
GG: Were you in any bands before you went solo?
LS: I wasn’t doing anything musically before I started playing in 2012 and had never sang in front of crowds before 2013
GG: What or who inspired you to get into music?
LS: My children inspire me in my writing, its often easier to write about those you love - My musical inspirations are; Janis Joplin, Eric Bibb, Joni Mitchel, Ella Fitzgerald, Ray Lamontange, Nancy Wilson
GG: What are your musical influences?
LS: My biggest musically influence for playing the guitar is Joni Mitchel, her style was so simplistic and pure, I liked it and have adapted my own little style, that’s simple and easy to play - Vocally my influence is Janis Joplin, the woman had an outstanding voice, I’m lucky I have a little huskiness to my lull but couldn’t come close to Janis.
GG: Describe your sound in three words?
LS: Soulful, Sweet and Unusual
Page 6
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
GG: What song of yours best sums Little Songbird up
LS: The song that best sums me up, is a song I wrote called Breadline, it pretty much sums my life up - financially am broke, however I’ve got my children and my castle with all its shiny things.
GG: What is your favourite song to play Is it different when you play live?
LS: I really enjoy singing a little song I wrote, called Beautiful Stranger - When I play it live, I feel like am singing to her.
GG: Do you play any covers?
LS: I don’t know how to play covers very well or at all, unfortunately I haven’t learned the guitar yet - although I can play a little version of The Beatles ~ Norwegian Wood - Not at all like the original, it’s been pecked - Little Songbird style
GG: What was the first tune you learned?
LS: Although I don’t play covers, I did learn how to play You Are My Sunshine, to entertain the kids with.
GG: How do you choose your set list?
LS: I try and go with what I feel like playing on the night, as it’s my own material and I’m new to the circuit, no one really has a favourite or a want for me to sing a particular song. So for now, I’m lucky to be able to sing and play what I like.
GG: Is there any songs you find you can’t quite get right?
LS: A song I wrote called Small Fears, I can’t stop my fingers from wanting to completely fall out with me, tricky finger stretching! If there is such a thing.
GG: Everyone hates being pigeon holed... if you had to pick a genre what would it be?
LS: Seventies chilled melodic happiness… perhaps (if that could be a genre)
GG: What do you bring to the table that other bands don’t. What makes you stand out?
LS: I think at the moment what makes me stand out is my guitar; it looks far too big for me to play properly! I play simple music and harmonise with vocals, people like it.
GG: Is there someone you’d like to be compared to?
LS: A few times people have commented on me sounding like my favourite singers (Janis and Joni) to have comparisons like that just
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 7
MUSICFEATURE
fills me with confidence, happiness and the drive to keep going. GG: Where has your best show been?
The best gig I have played has to be; The Bankton House Hotel, a young lad called Zach, invited me along to play one night. Fantastic atmosphere, the audience made you feel really welcome and yeh I thoroughly enjoyed myself, so much so that I used the venue for a charity gig.
GG: Which venue would you LOVE to play next?
I would love to be part of Edinburgh Music and Guitar Festival or King Tuts would be awesome
GG: So what can an audience expect when they bear witness to your live performance?
A musical soul lost in the moment.
GG: You’re just one woman and a guitar. Do you feel vulnerable on stage?
I always get lost in the moment whilst I’m on the stage, beforehand I can get anxious, often resulting in me using the toilet as much as a race horse. I can feel particularly vulnerable when a majority of the audience are younger than me. Most of my anxieties hit me as I’m due to come off stage, that’s the moment when real judgements are passed, that’s daunting
SON
Little Interview Copyright of all images are solely owned by the artists/original photographers Page 8
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
GG: What do you think of the Scottish music scene just now?
LS: Scotland has always had an incredible music scene and it just continues to grow
GG: What’s the best song you’ve heard in the past 12 months
LS: One of the best songs I’ve heard - is actually an old song which has had a little revival, Nancy Wilson with How Glad I am, a beautiful woman, beautiful vocals, I simply adore this song!!
GG: Any local bands that you are into just now
LS: I saw and hear The Barrels few weeks back, pretty good lads to watch, singer has great vocals!
GG: If you could tour with anyone, past or present, who would it be
LS: Got to be Janis Joplin or Paul Weller
GG: What does the next year hold for you
LS: My plans for the next year are to continue plugging away as I have been, get some new material recorded and uploaded, I’d like to venture to some festivals and enjoy the sunshine with my girls.
GG: It’s the year of Scottish independence, Yes or No
LS: Yes. Simple.
GG: Finally is there anyone you’d particularly like to acknowledge for supporting you along the way
LS: My children, Chloe, Cassidy and Tiana, without you three I am nothing. Also to each of my friends and family who have attended my gigs, a big thank you. I want to really thank my surgeon Mr Duncan Campbell, this man changed my world, he gave me the strength and ability to face the world - Broken smile and all :) thank you.
NGBIRD MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
www.facebook.com/littlefallensongbird PAGE 9
MUSICFEATURE
THE EXT
Where We Starte
Words by John Innes for GoGuide Magazine Contributor
www.facebook.com/pages/The-Extracts/146488938749916
Page 10
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
TRACTS
ed c/w Drowning in Space
T
he second recording from The Extracts is a generous double helping of sweet Scottish Indie pop. The band have added Adam Warrington to their line up on lead guitar, and they sound all the better for it, moving up a couple of grades to another level. The songs are strong and the playing fabulous. Where We Started retains the undeniable strains of their contemporary influences but is saved from any possibility of falling into stereotype by the clever lead guitar licks that send you on a refreshing and unexpected detour.
Drowning In Space is a joyous feel-good song, that drags the listener into the Summer from the depths of this Scottish winter. Think Supergrass or Tricky mashed up with The Beat – you can almost see the video! Chuck McAulay’s sublime drumming is deservedly dead centre the mix and is backed by a crackling bass line from Sam Carlyle. Both guitarists bounce jagged riffs off each other in a duel that no one can win.
Copyright of all images are solely owned by the artists/original photographers MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 11
MUSICFEATURE
Mr Suit GoGuide Magazine Contributor
Copyright of all images are solely owned by the artists/original photographers
Page 12
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
Mr Morcombe has been doing the rounds for few years now and he’s definitely been finding his own voice over those years as can be heard in his newer material, that’s not to say that his old stuff is bad, just really nice to see a nice progression. So much so that I think it would be cool to hear some of the older demo stuff revisited at some point in the studio and I for one would say that we would end up with an impressive collection of well crafted, executed and meaningful song for us to enjoy holed up on a cold autumn/winter day or maybe even a cool summers evening with a cold beer and whisky chaser by the fire pit. There is a bucket load of tracks available on Ryan’s sound cloud page and there is well enough good music on there to keep you listening and coming back for a
RYAN MORCOMBE
R
yan Morcombe is a 60 year old acoustic bluesy folk rock singersongwriter, aged and seasoned like a good bottle of bourbon. Well ok, not really but f*ck you’d never tell from the awesome tracks this spritely young lad fires out. One of the miners of the local music scene (he works like f*ck) and now part of the splendid Les Frites Petites stable of DiY artists Ryan has just released a new 5 track EP ‘Propped Up By Bones’… so it’s about time we had a closer look at our local super cool blues maestro. BTW I love 5 track EP’s, wish more people would do 5 track EP’s… ‘HELLO’ you 1-2 track guys… you know who you are ;-)
long time to come. Earlier tracks like ‘Bleeding Dry’, ‘Casanova’s Sweet’ and ‘What’s Her Name’ flirt with rock, folk and a more bluesey genre a tad and you get a feeling that there’s some soul searching going on here as to which path we’re going to end up going down. I’m easy, whichever road we take, I’m sure we will have a damn sweet soundtrack to get us there.
The new EP is probably the biggest indication of how things are going to turn out with a definite leaning towards a sort of indie hybrid folk/blues thing going on and a lot more use is made of Ryan’s voice as the overall flavour for the EP. And happily the old moothie makes an appearance from time to time. Opening track ‘Comin’’ is closer to Ryan’s older stuff, ‘Signed Off With a Kiss’ I just love, a dreamy indie folk tune, ‘Vilify’ is probably my least favourite track on the EP, it’s either under worked or overworked? I’m not sure which? ‘Follow and I Fall’ pulls in a weird dreamy Beach Boys/Simon and Garfunkel sort of vibe while the title track ‘Propped Up By Bones’ brings the EP to a close in a more standard folk fashion. Overall a really impressive effort…. Well done dudes. Without a doubt the LIVE scene is probably where a lot of Ryan’s stuff will shine, which is a good thing, cause the guy simply never stops bloody gigging (not going to use the running gag here ;-) You’ll find an awesome lover of music and a wicked personality shining through if you get the chance to catch the dude live, definitely one not to be missed if you can.
New EP @ http://lesfritespetites.bandcamp.com/album/ propped-up-by-bones Soundcloud @ https://soundcloud.com/ryan-morcombe
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 13
MUSICFEATURE
RYAN MORCOMBE INTERVIEW with
GOGUIDE MAGAZINE
GG: How long have you been a playing solo
RM: I’d class it as 2 3/4 years now. I’ve always said, if I hadn’t got out gigging my life would’ve probably revolved around weed and Football Manager. I know too many folk who’s lives and relationships have been totalled due to their addiction... To Football Manager. GG: Were you in any bands before you went solo RM: I am the better looking, all dancing, all singing half of ‘The Mad Rodents’ alongside my BFF and bestest drummer any wedding band ever seen, Mark Feeney of Major Tom. GG: What or who inspired you to get into music RM: Getting beaten in a Champions League final by Barcelona 8-5 in 90 minutes despite leading 5-0 at half time. But, seriously, I just love music. The attention and the buzz that comes with it, the socialising. It’s just quality. GG: Describe your sound in three words RM: Folk, indie, blues. GG: What was the first tune you learned to play RM: If I stretch my mind back into the noughties... Was probably... Hey Jude, or something else generic. the first songs I was proper proud to play were by The Roses, as a teenager listening to their eponymous album. Just set the standard for everything after The Smiths. Oasis, were thereabouts too. But, Noel Gallagher is a plagiarist ned. GG: What was the first tune you wrote RM: I dunno, something hopeless no doubt. It’s all good now but, I’m all singing, all prancing. GG: What song of yours best sums you up RM: Not a song of mine, I try to distance myself from the story of whichever song. If my songs were autobiographical I’d be some sort of bigamist cocaine dealing murderer with spiralling debts. So, I dunno. Not thought of it much. GG: What do you bring to the table that others don’t, What makes Page 14
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
www.facebook.com/ryan.morcombe
you stand out RM: I feel I stand out because, I stand and jump about. I probably have been the most active solo artist on the scene lately, I sing the blues with a modern twist and I hate everything and everybody. GG: Every one hates being pigeon holed... if you had to pick a genre what would it be RM: Pigeon-tamer GG: Is there someone you’d like to be compared to RM: Houdini GG: What has been the best gig you played and why RM: The next gig, you get some terrible, some great, some are just meh. GG: Which venue would you LOVE to play next RM: Played them all hahaha, a gig in a theatre would be awesome. With a captive audience. But, that’s a while away yet. Need a Grammy first. GG: So what can an audience expect when they bear witness to your live performance RM: Me jumping up and down, playing the moofy and singing songs that make you want to punch your neighbour in the solar plexus. GG: You’re just one man and a guitar. Do you feel vulnerable on stage RM: No, all eyes on me. The limelight. GG: What do you think of the Scottish music scene just now RM: It’s vastly underrated and deserves a bigger platform. We are Les Frites Petites. GG: Any local bands that you are into just now RM: I’d just check out all my bros. Any associate of Les Frites Petites (www.lesfritespetites.co.uk) I have a broad palette. GG: If you could tour with anyone, past or present, who would it be RM: Probably Donovan, but, I dunno, that would be down to similarity. Some of the best gigs I have played have involved a mad road trip with your mates. GG: What’s the best song you’ve heard in the past 12 months RM: Do I wanna know By Arctic Monkeys GG: It’s the year of independence, Yes or No RM: Aye GG: Finally, is there anyone you’d particularly like to acknowledge for supporting you along the way RM: Got to give mentions to: Les Frites Petites for releasing my material. And supporting local music. My close friends, my family, Mark Feeney, Jaffa Miller for his tour manager/roadie/open ear. My parents for birthing me. My girlfriend for tolerating and understanding me. SI Games and Sega for Football Manager. And all the people nationwide and beyond for liking my music, not letting me get too smug, I’m lucky to be as busy as I am.
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 15
MUSICQUIZ
D N I M R E V NE ’S T I S K C O L THE BOL
THE D I U GOG C I S MU QUIZ
1
ON ANSWERS GE CK PA INSIDE BA
2
NAME THE SONG s cloud lyrics the classic song Try to identify have ht ig clouds, we m from our song e or m e th of two removed one or not e ar ey th so st ju ‘obvious’ words too easy...
3
NAME THE ALBUR COVE
really, we’ve Pretty obvious tist names all the telling ar ow album kn l el from some w our younge iTunes pics for
ms m Tell us the ambu easy...!!!!
Page 16
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
4
5
DE C Z 6
8
7
9
E E UM RS
e removed s and titles ms (or CD’s/ er readers)
man...
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 17
WHAT’S ON...
MARCH MARCH
MUSIC
CHECKOUT OUR EVENTS PAGE @ WWW.GOGUIDEMAGAZINE.CO.UK/WORDPRESS/EVENTS-CALENDAR OR THE BANDS & VENUES SITE FOR FULL DETAILS
Page 18
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 19
WHAT’S ON...
MARCH MARCH
MUSIC
CHECKOUT OUR EVENTS PAGE @ WWW.GOGUIDEMAGAZINE.CO.UK/WORDPRESS/EVENTS-CALENDAR OR THE BANDS & VENUES SITE FOR FULL DETAILS
Page 20
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 21
CHECK ONLINE FOR YOUR AREAS NEXT EVENT
www.facebook.com/pages/Rock-a-Buy-Baby-Kids-Market
Page 22
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
CHECK DATES ONLINE
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 23
LIFE(STYLE) FEATURE
Page 24
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 25
LIFE(STYLE)FEATURE
COMEDY?!?
WHO KILLED
Something occurred to me over Christmas this year. Something bad. As a 30-something man with a family and a so-called career, I have become rather podgy and a touch… bland. In my ‘yoof’ I was full of vigour and enthusiasm; I had interests AND I had the time to engage in them and excitedly tell everyone about them. But now…not so much. An unpleasant consequence of this sad state of affairs is the fact that people don’t have a clue what to get me for birthdays or Christmas. So, among the socks and the witty star wars T-shirts (which I really do love), I receive DVDs. ‘Comedy’ DVDs. This year’s crop included Micky Flanagan and Kevin Bridges (both of whom, I’ve seen live… so some thought went into them for sure).
None of the above upset me. The ‘bad thing’ of which I suddenly became aware was this… the most successful comedians are dire. Sure, in a live setting with a belly full of overpriced beer, these mainstream comics can raise a chuckle…but in the comfort of my sofa, clad in my new Xmas onesie, their failings become all too apparent. Flanagan’s act is primarily based around the fact that he has noticed some funny things that happen to your everyday man (or his wife or family or whatever). He then asks the audience if they have ever noticed these things; perhaps upping the comedic nature of his observations with a little Page 26
pantomime or funny dance. Bridges is much the same (although his everyman has a more specifically Scottish leaning). He’s a bit like Frankie Boyle, but without the intellect or art. The thing they lack is any genuine comment on the human condition…particularly in our current situation. The reality of our life is a mix of war, economic crisis, an unelected government, and the very death of our freedom as individual humans. Remember when you could think things? Say things? Go places and talk to people without the NSA/ MI6 recording what the hell you’re up to? Flanagan and Bridges are typical of our modern comic success stories (think Michael Mcintyre or the git who does that ‘Mrs Brown’ nonsense on the BBC)…they are the x-factor winners, the one-directions. They are the distraction from all the horror around us, and they help the audience avoid thinking about the real issues and questions. Questions like “am I free?” “Do I actually love my wife?” “Do I need the latest f@cking iPhone?”. It seems that in times of social breakdown and recession, our population don’t want to think about these things. After all, the TV tells us that we’re free (even though we need ‘permission’ to form a mass protest). It doesn’t matter if we really love our wife/husband (so many people are in negative equity and simply can’t afford to MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
break up anyway). And of course we want the new iPhone (because buying whatever gadget we’re told to buy is what normal people do, and who wouldn’t trust Apple with their fingerprints, bank details, personal emails etc…?). The great comedians like George Carlin, Bill Hicks, or even Dave Allen spoke to us about what was important…but still managed to make us laugh. Their work had heart and they allowed us to look directly at the horrors of the world around us; unafraid of how much it hurt to think about the ‘big issues’. NONE of these comedians managed the kind of huge sales that the likes of the moon-faced Mcintyre can rake in…and it is our sleepy eyed consumers (who can least afford to be spending £15 on a stand up DVD that will be on TV in 3 months) who make this possible. But there is hope. There are comedians who, by choice or by self-imposed withdrawal, are outside the mainstream sausage maker… allowing them to do whatever they want. If you can spare a few minutes, check out the following comics on your favourite brand of streaming video website. Challenging, dark, but undeniably funny. Bob West GoGuide Magazine Contributor
DANIEL KITSON Like a geeky idiot savant. A man who refuses to do TV or release dvds. Until recently he counted Lou Reed among his fans. Imagine Peter Kay, but intelligent, moving, meandering, and considered by comics such as Stewart Lee or Mark Thomas to be the best living comedian. Sometimes it’s a regular stand up show. Sometimes it’s an hour-long, perfectly crafted story about a single subject such as a man stuck up a tree… when he comes to a town anywhere near you, you must see him. But be quick, because every show he does sells out almost immediately. www.youtube.com/watch?v=7itrqtMs1qY
DOUG STANHOPE I’ve loved Stanhope for years. A hard-touring, substance-soaked disaster, who has toured the US and Europe for decades now. A couple of years ago I was idly watching one of Charlie Brooker’s excellent BBC shows and -BOOM- there was Doug. Just a 2 minute bit, but I nearly cried with excitement. Doug touches on subjects such as his mother’s suicide (which he assisted) with openness and a genuine bleak hilarity that means your emotions take days to settle. Paraphrasing Chaplin, he believes that “humour is an act of defiance, we must laugh in the face of our helplessness”…if you can get past his jokes about getting his own poop on hotel bedsheets, you’ll love him forever. 2 words…LANGUAGE WARNING www.youtube.com/watch?v=S0ZKH2PGA8g
MARIA BAMFORD An American 40-something female funnywoman. But good. A history of mental illness has afforded her a body of work that surpasses practically any other female comic. Ignore the few TV spots she has had (they are often edited or the material has been selected for ‘suitability’). Her live work is superb and she bizarrely started her professional career in Edinburgh, where apparently no-one noticed she suffered from numerous mental problems…they just thought she was very, very funny. So they were half right. If Eddie Izzard had the nerve to perform without the word perfect script, with the word perfect ‘improvisation’ we’re all now wise to…he’d maybe produce this. Oh, and she had a bit part in Arrested Development…but that was before the major mental breakdown. www.youtube.com/watch?v=O3AvVXDJSGg All three of the above comedians have had opportunities in the mainstream ‘business’. Stanhope hosted ‘the Man Show’ in the USA, Kitson was in Phoenix Nights with the doughy Peter Kay, and Bamford was on US TV a LOT. All have turned their back on their chance of fame… and managed to hold onto that indescribable thing that makes them special. I think it’s called integrity.
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 27
S E D I S A 5
LIFE(STYLE)5-A-SIDES
you some agazine brings
GoGuide M
useful top 5’s
on some stu
interesting, ff that we find
t too...
that you migh
CRAZY CELEBRITY DIETS TO STAY AWAY FROM
GREEN SOUP
Some starts who want to slim down fast for roles live on daily cups of nutrient-packed watercress soup or cabbage soup. Can you really live on soup; do you really think it’s good for you? If anything else it’s got to be up there as one of the most boring diets out there.
BIOTYPING One 80’s pop start with a hankering for a makeup, a poncho and big hats wrestled with his weight until he apparently tried this diet that apparently targets your various problem areas. Sure, you seriously can eat your fat away? Hmmmm…? Working on the basis that certain foods affect your hormone levels thus determining where the fat is distributed across your body.
As usual though our celeb friends tend to overdo things from time to time and some are said to flood their insides with lemon juice, herbal laxative and saltwater flushes. These unfortunately only target a small group of toxins and a detox should really be about ridding the body of lots of toxins at once.
DUKAN Said to be the choice of the Middleton girls as they embraced this madcap diet to help them drop a few pounds before the royal wedding. Sure it appears on the surface that it achieved its desired results, but is it really a good thing? Is it healthy? Dukan is actually a diet that was criticised by the British Dietetic Association. The BDA has said that completely removing an entire food group for long period’s time isn’t very good for your body in the long run.
BABY FOOD From the extremely brainy mind of Jennifer Anniston? Downing around 14 tins of baby food a day has helped the star lose her excess weight, what excess weight? At least the chances of you picking up any additives are pretty low if all you eat is baby food all day.
iherb.com
MASTER CLEANSE It is a well-known fact that detoxing can definitely be a good thing.
Page 28
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
doyourpart.com
THE MOST DANGEROUS PLACES TO VISIT
SAN PEDRO SULA
excellentworlds.com
ACAPULCO theprisma.co.uk
SAN PEDRO SULA, HONDURAS Ranked as one of the planet’s most violent places for many years now with many sources claiming it has the highest homicide rate in the world @ 169 per 100,000 people. Arms trafficking and illegal firearms are rife in the city and tourists should avoid at all costs.
ACAPULCO, MEXICO Once a safe and luxurious resort area Acapulco is still pretty popular but huge increases in drug violence has now turned the area into an extremely dangerous area. Statistics recently showed that it has one of the world’s highest murder rates @ 142 per 100,000 people. With most crimes occurring in the surrounding areas anyone visiting Acapulco these days are advised to remain
GUATEMALA CITY guatewebtech.com
CAPE TOWN tazoff.com
firmly within the resorts where they are staying.
GUATEMALA CITY, GUATEMALA Despite having loads of tourist attractions Guatemala, a Central American nation on the Caribbean, is a nation plagued with large amounts of drug related violence. A high murder rate and street robberies, bus holdups and carjackings are all up there as reasons to stay well away.
RIO DE JANEIRO, BRAZIL Although loads of areas of Brazil have extremely high crime rates, some even more dangerous than Rio, by far the most popular tourist destination in Brazil is Rio, so it is up there with one of the most dangerous places
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
to visit. Despite being actually safer than it was a while back street crimes is still very high in many of the tourist areas, especially at night. To be safe you can still enjoy a host of the resort and beaches areas, but do use your common sense.
CAPE TOWN, SOUTH AFRICA With so much poverty and social unrest in Cape Town it suffers from an inflated crime rate. With large quantities of tourists drawn to the area because of its natural beauty and closeness to the many nature reserves etc., Cape Town can be a very dangerous place to visit but if you make sure you stay away from the more dangerous sections and never travel alone at night you can enjoy a pretty nice visit to the city.
PAGE 29
S E D I S A 5
LIFE(STYLE)5-A-SIDES
you some agazine brings
GoGuide M
useful top 5’s
interesting, ff that we find
on some stu
t too...
that you migh
S P I T G N I N E D R A G G N I SPR
5 spring gardening tips which you can take care of in preparation for the summer ahead
GUT OUT THE SHED Sometimes it doesn’t matter what you winter prep was like when you put your gardening stuff away, as soon as you open the shed door most of us will end up saying “I wish I’d….” as the sprinf light streams across your rusted and probably smelly garden arsenal. So first of get everything out, give the shed a good sweep out, clean your tools and give the stuff that needs it a wee oil/grease.
A WEE BIT OF COLOUR
Grab yourself some pre-potted bulbs or spring flowers and stick them at the front door for a splash of colour that will help you forget about the miserable weather.
BALD PATCHES
fertilize. Mow when growth is around 3 or 4 inches, and try not to cut off more than a half-inch at a time or it will effect growth.
WAR OF THE ROSES If you haven’t already done so you should give ant roses you have a proper prune as long as the weather is frost free. Prune using the recommended method for your type of plant but in general prune @ a 45 degree
Reseed parts of your lawn that look bare or scraggy, try to think about why it’s like that and if it’s soil related try to address that first. Aerate the ground with a fork to get it a bit more drainage anyway and fill the holes with sharp gritty sand. Break top the top couple of inches of the soil and rake flat, hand sow a recommended seed for your soil and light conditions. Once you’ve planted it water regularly to help keep soil moisture up and treat with a low-nitrogen, slow-release Page 30
angle, downwards and away from a growth bud pointing outwards, cut about ¼ inch above the bud. Clear stems crossing the middle of the plant to open the plant out. Remove any foliage and weak stems thinner than a typical pencil. Never cut below the graft point unless removing rogue sprouts… read some info on roses if you don’t know that that means ;-)
specializedlandscape.com
A WEE TRIM Giving your lawn a wee edge, using your newly cleaned and oiled edge trimmer will go a long way to making thing look that big bit better looks wise until the growth season kicks in. If things are still frosty don’t walk on the grass though or you’ll see your footprints in the damaged grass for months.
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
SPRING AUTO CARE WASH THE UNDERBODY Driving throughout a Scottish winter almost guarantees that the underside of your car gets a good coating of salt, sand and other dirt that can cause excessive and early corrosion. Modern cars are a lot better at combatting this but a wee tip to make sure rust doesn’t get a chance to started is to take your car for a spring jet wash and pay for an extra NON soap wash and target the areas underneath your car and wheel arches etc.
SCRUB INSIDE AND OUT The same salt and sand can also damage your car’s paint if given a chance so after visiting the jet wash don’t head back home and make sure you open all the doors and give them a good scrub with soapy water. Look over any
of the likely areas for chips and scratches and treat them with a touch up pan matching your cars colour. When done apply a good quality wax to protect the paint through the summer. Inside give the carpets a good going over with a hard brush and hoover and if you can hire a steam cleaner if you can if your car has a suitable interior.
WORN WIPER BLADES One of the number one spring jobs is to replace your wiper blades. Ice, snow and all the crap that gets thrown on your car throughout the winter usually render them pretty useless.
CHECK TIRES
in and have your wheel alignment checked but usually checking your tire pressure is enough to ensure safe and secure driving in the summer. In cold weather your tires can end up underinflated, warm weather kicking in can cause them to overinflate. When checking and adjusting your tyre pressure you should also inspect them to make sure they are wearing evenly and have plenty of tread, if not get your local tyre centre to check them. Having well maintained tyres and steering can save you a good amount of money over the year.
CHECK YOUR FLUIDS Fluids levels can deplete rapidly in winter so get prepared and top them up if they are low.
To take things to the extreme you should pop dailyautofix.com
7 DRINKS WORSE THAN A MARS BAR than you might imagine. However this energy boost does come at a price, 27.5g of sugar per 250ml can, which measures 3.5 grams more than a typical bar of chocolate.
SOBE GREEN TEA
We’re not saying any of these are particularly bad for you, just good to know something about what your drinking.
RED BULL One of the most popular energy drinks around somehow comes in with less sugar
Everyone knows that Green tea is good for you, right? Well that is true for the most part but the antioxidants you get in say a bottle of SoBe Green Tea also come hand in hand with 51 grams of sugar. So that’s equal to a couple of candy bars.
STARBUCKS CARAMEL FRAPPUCCINO This Starbuck milkshake’esque drink is so full of sugar its quite baffling – usually in the region of 50-64 grams of sugar per serving. So with a typical snack/chocolate bar around MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
20 odd I’ll let you work it out.
COCA COLA Your standard full fat blended coffee drink is understandably massively high in sugar, it may surprise you however to know that one of the world’s favourite soft drink contains 65 grams of sugar for a typical single-serve bottle.
MOUNTAIN DEW Now re-branded as Mtn Dew and widely known as the sugariest and most highly caffeinated soft drinks on the market, but you might just be blown away to find out that just one 20oz bottle of Mtn Dew has more sugar than three chocolate bars. Mtn Dew contains 77 grams of sugar in each single-serve bottle.
PAGE 31
LIFE(STYLE)FEEDMENOW
FEEDME FEEDMENOW!!!
S R U O C N MAI
STEAK FAJITAS
Page 32
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
SE
Preparation and cooking times
Prep time: 5 mins - Cook time: 10 mins
Ingredients
1 large bag of plain nachos Grated Cheese (your choice) From main course ingredients a generous portion of Salsa mix / 200g Steak / Roughly chopped Chorizo / Chillies & Peppers to taste
STARTE R
SPICY STEAK NACHOS
Now lets get down to the nitty gritty...
Grab a pyrex baking dish and cover the bottom with a layer of nachos. Pour on some of the main course salsa, some of the steak pieces and a good qty of the chorizo and top with grated cheese. Repeat this until you have a nice stack or the meat runs out. Throw in some fresh chillies, peppers to change the flavour profile a tad. For the final layer sprinkle generously with mozzarella and black pepper and bake in the oven @ 200 for about 10 mins or until the cheese has melted. For a crispy topping throw under the grill for min. Serve with a dip if desired.
DESERT
Preparation and cooking times
Prep time: 15 mins - Cook time: 25 mins
Ingredients
800 g beef skirt (600g for main 200g for starter) Olive oil Salt & pepper ½ a white onion, roughly chopped 1 regular size chorizo (75/25 split across main and starter) 2 red tomatoes, chopped 1 bunch of coriander, finely chopped 2 packets of pork scratchings, chopped up 6 tortilla wraps 1 lemon SALSA 1 x 400ml tin of tomatoes 1 bunch of coriander, stalks finely chopped 1 onion, finely chopped 2 cloves of garlic, finely chopped ½ a chorizo, roughly chopped 1 chili Natural yoghurt to serve
APPLE ENCHILADAS Preparation and cooking times
Prep time: 10 mins - Cook time: 30 mins Total time just over an hour
Ingredients
1 regular can/jar apple pie filling 6 (8 inch) flour tortillas 1 teaspoon ground cinnamon 1/2 cup butter 1/2 cup white sugar 1/2 cup brown sugar 1/2 cup water
Now lets get down to the nitty gritty... Stick your oven on @ 200.
Now lets get down to the nitty gritty...
Start with the salsa by dicing your onion and sweating them off in a fairly large pan, add chorizo, garlic, chili and coriander stalks then add tinned tomatoes and cook for 20 minutes. Leave to cool. Get your slice of beef and bash it as thin as possible. Drizzle on some olive oil then season. Put onto a really hot griddle or pan to cook, along with the chorizo. Once it’s cooked to your liking removed from the heat and chop the beef and the chorizo up on a board. Mix together with white onion, red tomatoes, the salsa and coriander. Squeeze some lemon into the mixture, top with coriander and crushed pork scratching’s and serve with your tortilla wraps.
Grease up a large baking dish. Open your pie filling and spread 2-3 large desert spoons down the middle of each tortilla. Sprinkle with cinnamon and then roll them up, tucking in edges as you go. Flip them over and place seam side down in your baking dish. For your sauce stick a regular pan on a medium heat, add the butter, brown and white sugar and the water. Bring to mixture to the boil stirring all the time; lower the heat and simmer for 3 minutes. Pour sauce over enchiladas and let them stand for half an hour to soak the goodness. Finally bake in your preheated oven for 20 minutes, or until they are golden brown.
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 33
LIFE(STYLE)PHONE APPS
M
y City is the new FREE game from LEGO® City where you get to take on the roles of a few carefully chosen LEGO characters, mainly the emergency services. All rolled up in one app you can become the guy who catches the escaped crooks in either action packed car chases, or on foot in the park. Become a firefighter and dowse blazes across the city. Guide your Coast Guard helicopter as you try to rescue shipwrecked sailors from the circling sharks. Be the fastest racer in town by speeding screeching through the streets in your slotracer. Pickup broken down cars on your tow truck or navigate the heliplane and deliver cargo to the airport. There is plenty crammed into this wee game, all looking pretty sweet with graphics that are crisp and colourful. Each game is simple to operate with usually no more than a single finger needed to control the action or a tilt of your device. The coolest aspect for me is the lack of any in game purchases or ads, and nice to see someone actually doing this. Features: • 7 mini games from your favorite LEGO® City themes: - Police - Fire - Coast Guard - Great Vehicles - Cargo Airport • Increased difficulty • Collect studs All games are suitable for children ages 5-12.
MY CITY by LEGO® City £FREE Mr Suit for GoGuide Magazine Contributor
GGGG Page 34
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
M moby’s.
ad Skills Motocross 2 is the follow up to one of my personal fav racing games for
MSM2 is all about being precise and going for the perfect run and thus requires patience and skill but it can be finished without some of the usual ‘fee’ based games. Although if you want to get there quicker and don’t mind splashing a wee bit of cash, you can choose that route.
MAD SKILLS MOTOCROSS 2 £FREE Mr Suit for GoGuide Magazine Contributor
GGG
The Mad Skills Motocross control system gives you buttons for your brakes and an accelerator and you will soon realise, if you haven’t played the original game, that the secret to the game is all in the landing. The main aim is to tilt your rider mid-flight in order to make the best landing possible, landing is the key to completing races as fast as possible or guiding you through the more difficult sections of a race. Leaning back also makes you go that wee bit faster on the surface, doing wheelies is faster still but dangerous if you lean too far, you’ll end up with your face in the dirt. You start the early levels with a good amount of time to make mistakes but as you progress you’ll soon be unable to make any without losing. If you have the patience to keep going after you fail that’s cool, for other like me there is the option of giving in MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
to temptation and splashing the cash to progress quicker. There are three difficulty levels from novice to expert and completing all the novice levels will grant to access to the intermediate tracks, and so on and so forth. Even the novice tracks are tricky and your opponents do have the power to improve their bikes as you get to the higher levels, you’ll need to do the same just to stay in the race so to speak. The freemium process lets you get ahead of the game by purchasing better gear (meaning you win more easily) for example instead of waiting until you rack up a big chunk of wins to unlock a better bike or some power ups, you can purchase the next upgrade for a couple of £ instead. It is probably the best fee based model that I’ve seen as it doesn’t truly kill the game off if you don’t want to pay anything, there is still a reasonable path to finishing the game if you’re willing to put in all the extra time and effort.
PAGE 35
LIFE(STYLE)
CHECKOUT THIS M FREE AND PAID APPS ON BO
TOP 10 PAY APPS
TOP 10 FREE APPS 1
Jumpy Jack redBit games
1
Pointless - Quiz with Friends - £1.49 Endemol Games Ltd
2
Unroll Me - unblock the slots Turbo Chilli Pty Ltd
2
Sleep Cycle alarm clock - £0.69 Northcube AB
3
Flappy Wings Green Chili Games UG
3
The Chase - £1.49 Barnstorm Games
4
WhatsApp Messenger WhatsApp Inc.
4
7 Minute Workout Challenge - £1.49 Fitness Guide Inc Health & Fitnes
5
Mad Skills Motocross 2 Turborilla
5
Minecraft – Pocket Edition - £4.99 Mojang
6
Talking Angela Out Fit 7 Ltd
6
The Room Two - £0.89 Fireproof Games
7
Hoppy Frog Turbo Chilli Pty Ltd
7
Smart Alarm Clock - £1.49 Plus Sports
8
Snapchat Snapchat, Inc.
8
Plague Inc. - £0.99 Ndemic Creations
9
Curling Micro Tribeflame
9
Heads Up! - £0.69 Warner Bros.
10
Disco Zoo NimbleBit LLC
10
The Impossible Game - £0.69 FlukeDude Ltd
Page 36
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PHONE APP CENTRAL
MONTHS TOP 10 OTH ANDROID AND IPHO N
E
TOP 10 FREE APPS 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
TOP 10 PAY APPS
WhatsApp Messenger
1
WhatsApp Inc
2
Facebook Messenge
3
BBC Media Applications Tech
Skype - free IM & video calls
4
Skype
Farm Heroes Saga
5
King.com
Official eBay Android App
6
eBay Mobile
Unroll Me - unblock the slots
7
Turbo Chilli Pty Ltd
BBC Media Player
8
BBC Media Applications Tech
Candy Crush Saga
9
King.com
BBC iPlayer
10
BBC Media Applications Tech
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
Minecraft – Pocket Edition - £4.99 Mojang
SwiftKey 3 Keyboard - £2.99 TouchType Ltd
The Room Two - £1.99 Fireproof Games
The Chase - £1.49 Barnstorm Games
Nova Launcher Prime - £2.60 TeslaCoil Software
Poweramp Full Version Unlocker £2.68 Max MP The Room - £0.69 Fireproof Games
TuneIn Radio Pro - £2.39 TuneIn
Titanium Backup PRO Key - £4.49 Titanium Track
Worms 2: Armageddon - £0.99 Team 17
PAGE 37
HEALTH&FITNESS
T.O.D. COACHING
POWER CLUBS
& Fit inc Studio Gym
Page 38
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 39
FITNESST.O.D.
TCO.AOCH.DING. &
M Y G O I D U T FIT INC. S SECTION GOGUIDE MAGAZINE LY TH ON M ’S M GY IO .D. FIT INC. STUD G AND KEEPING FIT. T.O IN TT GE T T.O.D. COACHING AND OU AB OW P NG YOU NEED TO KN IONING AND BOOTCAM IT ND BRINGS YOU EVERYTHI CO , NG NI AI TR , REGIMES. BEST IN EXERCISE BRING YOU THE VERY LIST EVENT TRAINING IA EC SP D AN TS BI HA D EATING WORKOUTS, DIETS AN
POWER CLUBS
N
o it’s not the holy grail, but as close to it as you will find in any gym.
Club training can be traced back to around 1257AD when this type of training was introduced to the Middle East by the hording Mongols. Most countries have their own form of power club and are known by different names • • • • • •
Mace bell Indian clubs Power clubs Bear clubs War hammers Meels
Clubs come in many forms and weights, traditionally they were made of wood and Page 40
described as a light bat (1kg -10kg) and a heavy bat (12kg plus).
Indian club training came into its own when British forces came aware of this form of training and shipped it back to the UK mainland; club training was highly popular till around the 1930’s. Recent years with the explosion of strength training and MMA power clubs have come back with a vengeance. Benefits of power club training • Increase in cardio output • Improved muscular endurance • Muscle hypertrophy • Body composition improvement • Increase in strength and power • Improved sports enhancement Weight wise clubs go from 1kg to around 10kg, however some can go up to around 20kg. Clubs are basically weighted at one end with a shank (handle) and a ball (stop)
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
at the end. The weight is held within the middle of the club just out with the grip, this places extra pressure on the user creating an increase in leverage resulting in a greater work capacity across joints and musculature movement and lifting.
STARTING POSITIONS FOR TRAINING STEADY POSITION
READY
AND NOW SOME BASIC POWERCLUB EXERCISES BASEBALL SWING
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 41
FITNESST.O.D. BICEP TO TRICEP SWING
SQUAT
Page 42
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
CRUCIFIX
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 43
FITNESST.O.D. TRANSVERSE
Page 44
DRAGIN SLAYER
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
Practice these moves and slowly increase the weight, try the circuit below. Start with a different exercise each time you start this workout to ensure that the body continues to adapt as it fatigues at different points in the programme.
CRUCIFIX BASEBALL SWING (EACH SIDE) SQUAT TRANSVERSE CAST DRAGON SLAYER 2 x 15 reps.
IF YOU REQUIRE MORE INFORMATION OR WANT TO BOOK IN FOR SOME POWER CLUB TRAINING PLEASE CONTACT BRIAN OR DANNY AT FIT INC STUDIO GYM. MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 45
FITNESST.O.D.
Page 46
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAY T.O.D. A VISIT AND SEE WHAT WE CAN DO FOR YOU!
Fit Inc Studio Gym 1 Simpson Parkway Kirkton Campus Livingston EH54 7BH Tel: 01506 413040 www.tod-coaching.co.uk
Team T.O.D/Fit Inc. and one WBO/WBA Champion Mr Nigel Benn
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 47
MOVIES Page 48
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
S MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 49
MOVIENEW RELEASES 300: Rise of an Empire 7th March – 15 Bullet 7th March - 15 Escape from Planet Earth 7th March – U Paranoia 7th March - TBC The Grand Budapest Hotel 7th March - 15 The Stag 7th March - 15 Need for Speed 12th March - 12A Back to the Garden 14th March - 12A Grace of Monaco 14th March - TBC Under the Skin 14th March - 15 Veronica Mars 14th March – TBC A Long Way Down 21st March - 15 Labour Day 21st March - 12A Starred Up 21st March - 18 Svengali 21st March – 15 About Last Night 21st March - 15 Muppets Most Wanted 28th March - U The Borderlands 28th March - 15 The Fold 28th March - 15 The Legend of Hercules 28th March - 12A Captain America: The Winter Soldier 28th March - TBC
MARCH 2014
Please check online or with cinema directly for latest information. Page 50
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
MOVIE QUIZ WE GOT HOLD OF THE SCISSORS AGAIN NAME THE MOVIES PLEASE?
SEE INSIDE
BACK PAGE
FOR ANSW E
RS
1
2
3
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 51
Page 52
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 53
MOVIEBOX OFFICE
THIS MON
Mr. Peabody and Sherman (20th Century Fox)
Mr. Peabody, the most accomplished dog in the world, and his mischievous boy Sherman, use their time machine - The WABAC - to go on the most outrageous adventures known to man or dog. But when Sherman takes The WABAC out for a joyride to impress his friend Penny, they accidentally rip a hole in the universe, wreaking havoc across history.
RoboCop (StudioCanal)
In 2028 multinational conglomerate OmniCorp is at the center of robot tech. Their drones are winning wars around the globe. When Alex Murphy, a loving husband, father and good cop is critically injured in the line of duty, OmniCorp decide to use their science to save his life. He returns as Robocop complete with amazing new abilities.
The Wolf of Wall Street (Universal)
The story of New York stockbroker Jordan Belfort. From the American dream to corporate greed, Belfort goes from penny stocks and righteousness to IPOs and a life of corruption in the 80s. Excess success and affluence in his early twenties as founder of the brokerage firm Stratton Oakmont warranted Belfort the title “The Wolf of Wall Street.”
Dallas Buyers Club (eOne Films)
Ron Woodroof is an electrician and rodeo cowboy with a devil-may-care lifestyle who is blindsided with an H.I.V.positive diagnosis and given 30 days to live. He quickly finds a lack of approved medications in the U.S. and crosses the border into Mexico where he learns about alternative treatments and begins smuggling them into the US.
12 Years a Slave (eOne Films)
Based on an incredible true story of one man’s fight for survival and freedom. In the pre-Civil War United States, Solomon Northup, a free black man from upstate New York, is abducted and sold into slavery. Facing cruelty, as well as unexpected kindnesses, Solomon struggles not only to stay alive, but to retain his dignity throughout.
G G G
G G G
G G G G G G G G G G G G
Information and ratings from combined sources including Page 54
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
NTHS UK BOX OFFICE TOP 10 Frozen (Disney)
A prophecy traps a kingdom in eternal winter, so Anna must team up with Kristoff, a daring mountain man, on a journeys to find the Snow Queen and put an end to the icy spell. Encountering Everest-like extremes, mystical creatures and magic at every turn, Anna and Kristoff battle the elements in a race to save the kingdom from destruction.
That Awkward Moment (eOne Films)
Zac Efron, Miles Teller and Michael B. Jordan star in the R-rated comedy, That Awkward Moment, about three best friends who find themselves where we’ve all been– at that confusing “moment” in every dating relationship when you have to decide “So…where is this going?”
Lone Survivor (Universal)
LONE SURVIVOR, starring Mark Wahlberg, tells the story of four Navy SEALs on an ill-fated covert mission to neutralize a high-level Taliban operative who are ambushed by enemy forces in the Hindu Kush region of Afghanistan. Based on The New York Times bestseller, this story of heroism, courage and survival directed by Peter Berg.
American Hustle (Entertainment)
Con man Irving Rosenfeld and his seductive British partner Sydney Prosser are forced to work for FBI agent Richie DiMaso. DiMaso pushes them into a world of Jersey powerbrokers and mafia that’s as dangerous as it is enchanting. Irving’s unpredictable wife Rosalyn could be the one to pull the thread that brings the entire world crashing down.
Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit (Paramount)
Based on the character created by bestselling author Tom Clancy, “Jack Ryan” is a global action thriller set in the present day. This original story follow a young Jack as he uncovers a financial terrorist plot. The story follows him from 9/11, through his tour of duty in Afghanistan, which scarred him forever, and into his early days in the CIA.
G G G
G G G
G G G
G G G G G G G
g IMDB, Box Office Mojo, BFI, Film Dates, Google+ MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 55
MOVIEREVIEWS
12 YEARS A SLAVE
Page 56
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
Victoria Tickle GoGuide Magazine Contributor
12
Years a Slave is a film that handles the controversial subject matter of slavery in the 1800’s. This rendition is a true story, based on the memoirs of Solomon Northup, a free man who was kidnapped from his town and sold into slavery in the southern states of the United States of America. For some people, the idea and concept of slavery of any human beings will make the film a difficult film to watch, and for some people 12 Years a Slave was exactly that – difficult to watch. But to be honest, in my opinion, if you can make it through Djanjo Unchained then you can make it through this film. That might sound a little insensitive, or that I’m making light of a true depiction of slavery in favour of a fictional one, but all I’m saying is that all of the concepts that make a film about slavery hard to watch (violence, mistreatment, injustice) are all much stronger and more prevalent in Django Unchained compared to 12 Years a Slave despite the latter being based in truth. With that being said, 12 Years a Slave is still a good film, I just don’t understand the hype surrounding it. In fact, I was a little bored I the cinema. I know that’s not how most people felt, but I’m being honest. Although this film is based on the real-life memoirs of the real-life Solomon Northup, I found myself not feeling much for any of the characters in the film. I tried to remind myself that this was all based on truth, but what was going on onscreen was not powerful enough to connote this. Characters that I was supposed to feel for I was mostly just irritated by, especially the character of Patsey, played by Lupita Nyong’o and the character who had her children taken from her. However, some of the characters were great. Michael Fassbender is always great no matter what he is in and 12 Years a Slave is no exception. I hated his character and yet I was fascinated by him whenever he was on the screen. Benedict Cumberbatch was also exceptional onscreen, it’s just a shame that he didn’t have a more prolific role to play. In fact a lot of the actors get very little screen time, but they shine nonetheless. There was a sense of despair and injustice in the film and it does show slavery for what it is; a barbaric and evil part of human history, but the film didn’t do what I expected it to do – it didn’t really drive the message home. However, the cinematography on this film can’t be faulted. The set design, costumes and colour pallets used were fantastic and helped to redeem this film in its tone, message and themes. 12 Years a Slave has very high Oscar hopes, but I don’t think it deserves most, if any, of the awards it might win that it is nominated for. I think that there were much better films that came out at the same time. It’s a shame too, because 12 Years a Slave has all the right ingredients for a great film; a fantastic cast, a compelling plot and beautiful cinematography, yet it is lacking. This is probably due to Steve McQueen’s directorial style. This film should have, and could have, been much more. It’s almost an insult to the memory of the real Solomon Northup and all the men and women who suffered like he did. This is a perfect example of a good story that is poorly handled.
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 57
MOVIEREVIEWS
Page 58
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
47
7 RONIN MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 59
MOVIEREVIEWS
47
Ronin is the 7th cinematic adaptation of the historical legend of the 47 Ronin, but this is the first Hollywood one. It is a fantastical samurai tale with hints of historical legend and is inspired by the 47 Ronin legends and mixes modern day story telling with an ancient story and throws in action scenes and CGI to revamp the story for a whole new audience.
Visually, this is a stunning film. The mix of Japanese culture and monsters all combined with a Hollywood budget makes for a gorgeous film. The costumes, colour scheme, scenery and CG are absolutely breath-taking. Despite this film relying a lot on visuals, it is still a believable fantasy. It’s not so Page 60
overly spectacular that all believability and credibility is lost. The story for this film is passable, and there are historical inaccuracies that concern the legend of the 47 Ronin that people might get irritated by if they have prior knowledge to it. However, this is not a documentary, this is a dramatic reimaging with a big budget, so of course there are going to be discrepancies between this adaptation and others, as well as with the original legend itself. There is plenty of room for artistic licence and audiences should not be angry at the filmmakers for using it. 47 Ronin is a bit slow to start, and I was checking my watch at several points in the film. That’s not to say that I was completely bored, but I wasn’t as gripped as I could have been. I think if the pace had been picked up a little bit, or there were some cuts made to the final edit then perhaps the film would have been a little more consistently exiting. From the trailer I expected a visually stunning, but narratively challenged film and
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
the reality is that expectation I had wasn’t far from the truth. This is definitely a more visually strong film than a narratively strong one. It’s missing a couple of things that if they had just been worked on a little bit more then it would have made all the difference. One of these examples is with character development for the villains. They were just there, and they didn’t really evolve from something to anything. I’d have loved more from the witch, but instead of a fleshed out character I got bare bones at best. The script was a little lacking in places but the action sequences made up for these shortcomings. 47 Ronin is one of those films that will never be experienced better than in the cinema due to just how visually appealing it is. Whilst there is a lot to be desired with this film with regards to the script and the dialogue, it’s a worthwhile watch overall and is worth watching for the visuals alone.
Victoria Tickle GoGuide Magazine Contributor
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 61
Page 62
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 63
MOVIEREVIEWS
DALLASDALLAS BUYERSBUYER CLUB
Page 64
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
BDALLAS RS CLUB BUYERS CLUB
D
allas Buyers Club is an outstanding story that has been handled brilliantly by the director and the actors alike to give audiences a viewing experience that they won’t soon forget.
The story follows Ron Woodruff who is diagnosed with HIV and later AIDS as he attempts to thwart the FDA in order to get drugs that can treat people with HIV and AIDS legalised. He comes across Rayon, a transvestite who suffers the same affliction as Woodruff and together they set up a business in order to help supply the medicine to HIV and AIDS patients that doctors aren’t dolling out yet. Dallas Buyers Club is a very strong film in every sense of the word. Everything on screen was used to its full potential, from set design to the actors themselves, who gave some of the most powerful performances of their lives. Both Matthew McConaughey and Jared Leto gave 100% to their characters and both underwent dramatic transformations in order to play their strung-out and AIDS inflicted characters. Both of them lost a lot of weight which helped them to give
outstanding performances. That’s not to say that their performances rested solely on their appearance, because the raw emotion and flawless delivery of their lines and expressions were what made them stand out in a powerful film in which they could easily be lost.
Matthew McConaughey has really come into his own and evolved into a serious actor that most people wouldn’t have believed he could ever have become. Gone is the heartthrob who was just placed into films in order to put bums on seats in the cinema, and in his place there is a stellar actor who is capable of handling not only a difficult subject matter, but a really complicated character with apparent ease. The character development that Woodruff goes through, from a homophobic aggressive personality to an accepting and understanding vessel of empathy was handled with expert skill by McConaughey and it’s difficult to imagine anyone but him in the role. The only actor who fell below the very high bar that this movie demands was Jennifer Garner, who compared to McConaughey and Leto was a bland and boring character who the audience never really feels anything for. Dallas Buyers Club is a film that handles a very serious and real subject matter
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
with both the delicacy and urgency that it requires, and whilst it isn’t exactly an original theme for movies, it arguably handles the subject matter the best. It poses important questions regarding the disease and how society treated people with it whilst avoiding clichés at all times and it never once fell into a melodrama-style genre. It’s a very real and hard-hitting story that, due to its gritty nature, stays with you long after the credits stop rolling. It’s a great story that will hold your attention all the way through to the end.
The screenplay is magnificent and uses humour in not only the correct places, but also in a manner that relieves a bit of tension and lightens the mood without ever letting the audience lose their grasp or interest in the situation at hand. Dallas Buyers Club is both fascinating and horrifying at the same time and is uncomfortable to watch at times, and audiences can’t help but to feel for the two main characters as they struggle and fight through one of the most difficult times that a human being can. This is a film not to be missed. Victoria Tickle GoGuide Magazine Contributor PAGE 65
Page 66
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 67
MOVIEREVIEWS
THE MARKED ONES
Page 68
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 69
MOVIEREVIEWS
Victoria Tickle GoGuide Magazine Contributor
Page 70
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
P
aranormal Activity films are always going to divide audiences when it comes to any and all aspects of the films. Some people love them, some people hate them and there are inter-fan arguments as to which ones are the best. For me, the first and third films were not only the best, but also the scariest. The second film was a little irrelevant, and seems like an experiment in sequels, and the fourth film…well we can all pretend that that didn’t happen. I think even the filmmakers are trying to forget that one. This fifth instalment, Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones has me somewhat divided within myself the way that most fans are divided. Part of me likes and respects it for what it is trying to do, and part of me sees it as nothing more than yet another money-grab.
Most film franchises that go past a trilogy begin to lose that initial spark that made the first movie so original/great/scary as each new addition is added to the franchise, and the Paranormal Activity franchise is unfortunately no exception. Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones felt a little bit like the filmmakers weren’t really trying anymore. Every film in the franchise before it came out in October, but this one didn’t. In fact it didn’t even come out in early November. It came out in January. I understand that this film had a longer production time, (despite the end product having a short runtime) but this is the fifth film and they should have been more organised. It also had the lowest box office opening weekend of any of the previous four films. Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones isn’t an official sequel in the franchise; instead it’s a spin-off film that is using the name and popularity of Paranormal Activity to sell tickets. In my opinion they should have just called the film The Marked Ones and let audiences have a pleasant surprise towards the end of the film when the Paranormal Activity connections are made (same themes and actors) and let that cement the fact that it’s a spin-off. To the films credit though, the change of scenery was a good move. The first four films were about upper-middle class white people experiencing paranormal problems, but this film took its audience to a Latino neighbourhood that not many people would feel comfortable walking it’s streets in the daytime, never mind at night. That being said, it’s a new neighbourhood but not a new story. It’s still pretty much the same thing as before, and the franchise is starting to seriously lack originality. Its ending tried to be original and complex, but (without giving away any spoilers) it just ended up muddled. However it does answer certain questions that previous films brought up and it also allows for a fifth instalment of the original franchise to be released this October. Overall, it’s a better movie than the fourth one, but that wasn’t exactly hard to do. To its credit, there were a few redeeming features about this instalment, asides from the already mentioned change of scenery and plot explanation. The humour in the film was actually pretty good, and this film actually had audiences laughing at intended funny parts, unlike a lot of the previous films. There was also real character development during the narrative – by the time the possessions were underway the audience was invested in all three of the most prominent characters rather than just waiting for their demise. However, when all is said and done, this is definitely a movie for the hard-core fans of the franchise. It doesn’t seem to have anyone else in mind. It’s almost like the movie makers had the attitude of “if a couple of movie-goers rather than fan-boys liked the movie then that’s a bonus, but this is for the fans”. Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones has an unusually short runtime, but doesn’t feel rushed; in fact to extend the runtime would only be to unnecessarily drag out the film. All in all, this instalment isn’t the worst to have come from the franchise, but it’s not the best either. Victoria Tickle GoGuide Magazine Contributor MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 71
Page 72
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 73
MOVIEREVIEWS
Page 74
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 75
MOVIEREVIEWS
T
he first thing I will say about this film is that it doesn’t feel as long as it actually is. I know that a lot of people have been put off watching this in the cinema because of its runtime, and whilst it is unusually long, it is worth every single minute. If you do see this in the cinema do not get a large drink because you won’t want to miss a minute of this gem of a film whilst you are in the bathroom! Despite the runtime nearly hitting 3 hours I didn’t look at my watch once! A lot of this has to do with a great script, and intriguing story and phenomenal acting and on screen presence by everyone involved.
The story of The Wolf of Wall Street is based on the real life memoir of the same name which has since become a best seller. The story concerns itself with shady and immoral characters who indulge themselves in greed and debauchery to the point of disgusting excess, yet it is utterly compelling to watch. This is mostly down to Scorsese and DiCaprio who make this behaviour entertaining to watch when it really shouldn’t be. The thing that really helps to carry this story along during its 3 hour timeframe is that it is very
Page 76
funny. It’s really hard to have real humour in films that don’t involve or rely on slapstick of adopt a ‘stand up’ style. But The Wolf of Wall Street manages this flawlessly. It nails it. It’s full of genuine humour of the black comedy genre. A lot of this comes from Leonardo DiCaprio’s character breaking the fourth wall, which usually ruins a films atmosphere, yet it enhances the audiences experience in this film.
Hill, who I have to admit I didn’t used to think much of. I always saw him as an actor who was type-cast to films like Superbad and 21 Jump Street and would never amount to much more than that. But this is a role that has proven me wrong. He is so good you forget that this is a film and not real life. He’s so funny in everything he does, and he improvised a lot of his scenes, which just goes to show how good he is.
The humour, along with the rest of the dialogue, whilst being peppered with obscenities is very witty and the script is beyond compare. It manages to be both outrageous yet realistic as it straddles the line between believability and too-far perfectly.
This is definitely one of Scorsese’s best films to date and will probably remain as such. It’s definitely Oscar worthy and an Oscar contender and I have really high hopes for it. The camera shots were great; especially the slow motion moments and the soundtrack fit every scene perfectly.
Everything about The Wolf of Wall Street is brilliantly excessive and even though it glamourizes immoral behaviour, it’s one of the most entertaining films I’ve ever seen. There have been some people who condemn the film for practically promoting this kind of behaviour, but honestly, that’s Hollywood for you. It’s always been Hollywood’s style and it always will be. If that makes you uncomfortable then my advice would to be never to read or watch anything ever again.
There’s no real character development in the film, the characters end up the same way that they started, but the audience expect that. This is entertainment and is based on real events. The flaw of a lack of character development is easily overlooked. The victims in the film are also faceless and aren’t even really explored, but again, this isn’t a film about them. It’s a thrill ride into debauchery and wealth that most of us will never experience. It’s a safe experiment for audiences and it’s a ride I will go on many, many times as well as lots of other people. I have nothing but praise for this film.
The acting is like none I’ve ever seen before. Everyone was bringing their A game on this set. But special notice has to go to DiCaprio. He is an exceptional actor and this is one of his best roles to date. He’s remarkably never won an Oscar before, and if he doesn’t win for this then there is no justice in the world. This is an Oscar worthy performance if I’ve ever seen one. I also have to mention Jonah MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
Victoria Tickle GoGuide Magazine Contributor
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 77
MOVIEREVIEWS
Page 78
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
her
B
efore Her I only knew Spike Jonze from Jackass. I love Jackass, and I loved the stunts involving Spike. He’s been an old man, a fat old lady and a skinny old lady with exposed breasts before. I’ve also watched pretty much every single behind the scenes section I can on Jackass DVD’s and seen Spike throw his shoes into other cast members testicles and other rude and crude things. So when I saw his name on the credits of Her I initially thought to myself “nah, that can’t be the same guy”. I’m so happy that it was! The fact that it is the same guy proves that people who like Jackass aren’t what the stereotypes would have you believe because Spike Jonze is a key member of the Jackass crew (and sometimes the cast), and yet he wrote and directed Her – a beautifully intimate tale of what happens when the boundaries and meaning of what it is to be human becomes blurred. Her is complex and interesting and is so relatable to pretty much everyone who sees it. It explores the emotions that we all know we have but we might not fully understand them yet; love, jealousy, betrayal, sadness
and frustration. It also explores themes which are still being figured out such as the question of where the line between being human and just artificial intelligence is, and when will the boundaries shift or things be pushed too far? In the ever more technologically advanced world, Her depicts a believable and, most likely, realistic story that’s set in the not-too-distant future. The script is beautifully written and is existential without being pretentious, which is a very difficult balance to strike. The film could have easily been clichéd or unintentionally funny, but because it was in the hands of masters, this was not the case. Her also had a huge potential to be creepy rather than beautiful, as the thought of a human/technology hybrid romantic relationship has a high chance of making people uncomfortable. But due to how it was handled, tit came across as anything but creepy. There were even times when human/human interaction was the creepiest moments. The cinematography matches the themes of the film as well as the script and delivery in terms of the level of skill and beauty behind it. There were crisp images and the close-up’s, whilst plentiful, never seemed overused, and the thought of using any other shot seems as though the film would have come off worse. The acting was great across the board. Joaquin Phoenix was exceptional and really captured the feelings of loneliness in his expressions. The many extreme close-ups helped him with this. Scarlett Johansson was enchanting as Samantha and Amy Adams always excels in everything she does, and this is no exception. The acting was made even MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
more impressive by the fact that, in the grand scheme of things, there isn’t physically much going on on-screen. It takes a lot to keep an audience’s focus in films like this, and Her manages this flawlessly. Her explores the current trend of humans increasingly investing more time with and interacting with technology more and more whilst real-life human relationships and interactions suffer. Because of its closeness to reality, Her can also be seen as a documentary that was made before its time, which is a scary and unnerving (but probably true) idea. It’s a very realistic science fiction film. There’s something beautiful and captivating about a film that can display human emotions better than most other films considering one of the main characters in this film isn’t even human. The ending seems very open to interpretation as to what is going to happen to the characters if the credits weren’t rolling. I’m not usually a fan of this sort of storytelling device, but it works in this film as the whole theme is about the future and how uncertain we all are about it. Some scenes in Her did feel a little overly long but all in all, it held my attention throughout. This is the type of film that is going to divide its audience; people will either love it or hate it, some people will say that it is boring; others will say that it’s poignant. Despite audiences’ opinions, it’s nice to see an original film do so well given that the current Hollywood trend is to only put out sequels, reboots and adaptations. Victoria Tickle GoGuide Magazine Contributor PAGE 79
Page 80
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 81
MOVIEREVIEWS
Page 82
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
I
f ever there was a movie that makes you want to be proactive in life, this is it. The Secret Life of Walter Mitty is a beautiful cinematic experience whose message is “do” instead of “just dream”. This film is relatable to almost everyone. How is that possible with the over-active imagination of Walter Mitty? It’s not what he does that’s relatable, it’s how he feels. Ben Stiller is surprisingly good in his role as Walter Mitty. I never once saw any of his other roles from his comedy films creep into this film like I have done with other comedy actors who went serious (like Will Smith or Jim Carey). In fact the whole cast was very believable and a joy to watch for the whole film. This combined with a great script really helped the characters come alive for
audiences. The Secret Life of Walter Mitty is Hollywood with a soul; it’s Hollywood at its best. It’s both heart-warming and entertaining. It’s also funny in the right places – it’s never slapstick or crude just to get laughs. The comedy is carefully constructed and though through, and comes across as poignant and perfect in the final product. The whole film is very elegant in everything that it does and it’s never pretentious, which it was easily in real danger of becoming. The cinematography was absolutely outstanding. The whole film was so beautiful, even the everyday shots that real-life people will see in their real lives. Every shot was handled with excellent lighting and a beautiful grace that really did show the best of everything. Every frame was crisp and clear and just seemed so pure. The CG was also stunning without ever becoming obvious or outshining anything else on screen or any other scene surrounding it. The score also helped dramatically with the overall feel and tone of the film. It
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
really added to the atmosphere of the experience. Nothing ever became clichéd, which in less experienced hands it could have easily become. What was refreshing about this film was that although it had a romantic undertone, it wasn’t the most important element in the film; adventure and embracing life was, and it’s so nice to see for a change. The Secret Life of Walter Mitty is so much more than a movie, it’s an experience. Its visuals and its message stays with you long after you leave the cinema. The corporate plugs referenced in the film are a little frustrating and a few too many, but they are forgivable. This is easily Ben Stiller’s best picture. It not only tops the rest of the films in recent memory, but has also quickly become one of my favourite films of all time. My only regret is that I didn’t see it sooner.
Victoria Tickle GoGuide Magazine Contributor
PAGE 83
Page 84
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 85
Page 86
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 87
TV Page 88
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 89
TVFEATURE
MOONE BOY
Mr Suit GoGuide Magazine Contributor
Page 90
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
B
ased in 1989 Ireland season one of Moone Boy introduced us to Martin Paul Kenny Dalglish Moone and his imaginary friend Seán Murphy. At its heart the show is an eclectic and eccentric looks back to an innocent, prepuberty time in a young boys life where, for the most part, you don’t have a serious care in the world…. Apart from religion, school bullies, various doodle related quandaries, last year at primary school, a bunch of crackpot sisters and a couple of ditsy parents. "Ever wanted to be the imaginary friend of an idiot boy in the West of Ireland? Me neither, but there you go." Chris O'Dowd takes on the imaginary friend Seán role, the show narrator and also he hops on the co-writing role as well. 11-yearold, so-called idiot boy Martin Moone, played by the excellent David Rawle, is the only boy, and youngest member, of the Moone
family of four kids. They all live together with mother Debra (Deirdre O'Kane) and father Liam (Peter McDonald), in the small rural town of Boyle, County Roscommon, which funnily enough is O'Dowd's hometown. Strangely for a quirky light-hearted comedy topics covered include; bullying, church corruption, parents lying to their kids, teenage pregnancy, secret male clubs (it’s not what it seems) ;-), protection rackets, politics, feminism, and a host of others. Over the first season our anti-hero Martin joins the church alter-boy Mafia, has his new birthday bike (bought with Readymix cereal box tokens) pulled apart by twin bullies, sells his sisters ‘assets’ for protection, accidentally goes to school in makeup, brings down his very own Berlin wall, has some life lessons from long lost busking uncle Daniel… but let’s not cover all the big stuff and just let you find out for yourself. Overall Martin Moone is a bit slow, a bit of a dreamer but at the same time has a youthful wisdom about him… although we do first see him trying to resuscitate a dead bird “You'll be back on your feet in no time, Mrs. Magpie" he comforts the lifeless bird, which isn’t anything like a magpie. He draws, I mean he draws… a LOT and throughout the series his drawings spring to life chronicling the various issues occurring around him… like the onset of puberty portrayed as a snowball v hot chick tennis
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
match. The series does have a hankering for me back to an old fav movie of mine ‘Drop Dead Fred’, which also deal with issue of imaginary friends in a weird comic fashion along with some of the elements seen in American shows like ‘Malcolm in the Middle’ although maybe not as ‘shouty’ with its humour, is isn’t polite as such and you might consider thinking twice ion watching it with your grannie but nearly all the funny lines make you laugh so I’m guessing the guys are doing a good job. Co-written by O'Dowd along with fairly newcomer Nick Vincent Murphy it is a well-constructed little jem of a piece which hopefully lasts a few more seasons. The casting of O'Dowd and guest appearances by the likes of Steve Coogan as Francie ‘touchy’ Feeley, the weird local fish factory owner and Johnny Vegas as Crunchie Haystacks, another kids imaginary friend, go a long way to helping the ‘familiarity’ of the show and it soon settles in to a comfortable position in the Sky planner. Season 2 kicked off on Sky at the end of Feb so checkout the first season on DVD or catchup settle down for some more charming evenings with the Moone family. PS – Being set in the 80’s the show features an awesome soundtrack of 80’s classics and the catchiest theme tune since Father Ted thanks to a wee ditty from The Sultans of Ping FC… “Where’s me jumper, where’s me jumper, where’s me jumper...”
PAGE 91
DVDTOP10
Page 92
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
R
ight from the off I’m probably going to buck the trend a wee bit here and say that to be honest I’m not really enjoying this show all that much.
Sometimes when I see these big HBO shows I think to myself that they are fast becoming one of the last sanctuaries for actors. Allowing them to try different things I suppose, to explore opportunities for writing or producing and that maybe helps to explain just why we end up with Matthew McConaughey and Woody Harrelson starring in an 8 part series about a couple of US homicide cops being Directed by Cary Joji Fukunaga, who is someone with a less than spectacular CV for this sort of thing. For me the True Detective doesn’t really bring anything new to the table, unless you count cinematography, a lot of programmed looks to camera and some awesome ‘vocal patterns’ as someone online suggested. To the layman home viewer like me however, it’s definitely something we’ve all seen before from the pair, and on a subject that’s been covered repeatedly in other movies and TV shows. All I can see in this one is the latching on to the recent trend of dragging thing out, or ‘building tension’ as they would probably like it to be called. For me, it’s 6 episodes in and nothing has really happened that hasn’t been telegraphed 2 episodes ahead. So what’s it all about? Well, McConaughey and Harrelson play Louisiana detectives who were tasked with investigating a weird killing. I say ‘were’ because the crime occurred in
the past and the show jumps from various timelines across 1995, 2002 and almost present day 2012. Initially the case seems to be some cult related sacrificial kind of thing but with little or no real evidence it is hard for the team to pin it down to one person or group. In 2012 we have another couple of detectives investigating a similar case who call on our semi fu*ked up dynamic duo to answer some questions about the previous investigation. The series then spends most of its time delving behind the façade of the two detectives, into their personal lives and attempts to paint a complex picture of these guys’ lives and the case that they were investigating. Much of which for me falls in deaf ears as, like I said before, it’s all been said before and in a lot less laboured manner and with more pace and tension than we see here. Even the programmes ‘Likers’ have agreed that it’s a slow starter but that’s just one issue for me. The actual story also seems overly predictable from the cops private life perspective and sometimes I feel like it is never going to unfold for me. It’s too easy for a stressed married cop to seek refuge in a younger woman’s arms, it’s too easy for another to become a pill popping junkie, it’s just too easy… I’m waiting for the surprises guys? There isn’t a puzzle either, no mystery to piece together, no “it was him” moments or “he’s lying” scenes… if there is one it is way above my level of viewing interest. Without a doubt all the glances and phrasing make the characters super believable and the show is an object lesson in character acting no doubt but for me all that sugar coating it is to the detriment of any actual gripping story. Probably, at its heart, this is MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
an 8 part experience that could probably have been told by Mulder and Scully over a couple of 45min X-Files episodes back in the day. As close to a book on screen some have compared it to films like Seven or akin to TV show The Following… both of which have rich storylines unfolding throughout, and at their heart, as opposed to appearing more like a platform for some actors to proverbially ‘masturbate’ their way through. It is like a biblical take on a tried and tested genre and one that I don’t really think needs a biblical take. So, overall, with six episodes done and dusted and only one real ‘episode’ to speak of the final two True Detective episodes have a lot to live up to and a lot to cram in to make it one to remember for me. I do like the proposed format of the show, where the following seasons will have different story, writers, cast and director etc. but for it to be considered a potential great for me it really has to have something resolved or opened every episode, if that happened in Season one I must have dozed off? Gees that came off more negative than I thought it would, maybe just too disappointed as I was really looking forward to this one. I’ve just finished binge watching season one of the awesome The Fallowing, so guess I fancy watching ‘Seven’ tonight…
Mr Suit GoGuide Magazine Contributor
PAGE 93
DVD Page 94
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 95
DVDTOP10
1
GAME OF THRONES - COMPLETE THIRD SEASON (WARNER HOME VIDEO)
2
CLOUDY WITH A CHANCE OF MEATBALLS 2 (SONY PICTURES HE)
3
CAPTAIN PHILLIPS (SONY PICTURES HE)
4
TOY STORY OF TERROR (WALT DISNEY)
5
TURBO (DREAMWORKS ANIMATION)
THIS MONTHS DVD TOP 10
6
BLUE JASMINE (WARNER HOME VIDEO)
7
RUSH (STUDIOCANAL)
8
THE CROODS (DREAMWORKS ANIMATION)
9
BARBIE - THE PEARL PRINCESS (UNIVERSAL PICTURES)
10 Page 96
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
ABOUT TIME (UNIVERSAL PICTURES)
TH...
OUT NOW AND THIS MON
new dvds CAL AT YOUR LO
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
VIDEO SHOP
PAGE 97
DVDREVIEWS
Y
ou know when you see a bag of spiders, and you’re like. That’s pretty messed up and all kinds of freaky. Cause a bag of spiders is pretty bad. Then someone starts pouring the spiders over your face and you’re like. THIS IS THE WORST THING EVER. Then you can’t stop screaming and the spiders are pouring into your mouth and all you can think is why can’t I stop screaming, the spiders are crawling into my mouth but you just can’t stop. That’s this film. It starts off with our protagonists in a really bad situation. Then it gets worse, and even worse. It is pure genius film making that drags you in won’t let you go. Kind of the same feeling you get watching Neil Marshalls ‘The Descent’ which is another horror film I love.
The film follows a colony of survivors headed by Laurence Fishburn (not Samuel L. Jackson crazy American newscaster guy). A new ice age has taken hold of the world after weather stations created to prevent it happening broke down. Then a flu arrived which wiped out most of the survivors. So anytime someone sneezes it suddenly becomes a life or death situation for all the people of the colony. They’re put into quarantine and if they stay ill they are sent out into the wild and either shot by the awesome legend that is Bill Paxton or go for a long walk. So, even worse. They then receive a distress signal from another colony, which as you guessed it, makes everything get even worse. It’s such a great film with an incredible sense of foreboding around every corner. It’s seriously tense with some awesome action sequences for what is ultimately a low budget Canadian film. It shows how much your money can get from you if you wander away from Hollywoodland. You should check it out… And sorry for the spider thing earlier if you’re scared of spiders. Not really. James McCulloch GoGuide Magazine Contributor Page 98
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
DVD/BLU-RAY REVIEWS
T
his is one of those weird films I was expecting to hate. I’d heard so many bad things, so I was all kinds of shocked when I actually enjoyed it. Not just a little bit either; this is a really good fun film. I mean you have one of the most hated people for no reason on the internet Ryan Reynolds being funny and charming but you know, dead. You have Jeff Bridges being a dead cowboy, I mean what’s not to like about that. It’s basically Men in Black but with ghosts.
Okay there are no good roles for women in this film. I mean Mary Louise-Parker is an interesting character until they try to hint at some weird love thing with Jeff Bridges, which doesn’t really work. I mean what’s wrong with having a strong female character who doesn’t turn into a flirty love thing for a male character. I mean its 2014 right? She is completely underused to such a level that it’s actually annoying. But alas, they would probably have just had some more weird love things happening so maybe it’s better she wasn’t. Oh and the special effects are horrendous too. I mean they look like they’re from Men in Black, but like you’re watching Men in Black now. The kind of thing that would have looked great in the 90s but these days doesn’t cut it. Kevin Bacon turns up as a bad guy and we also see the big bully older brother from Home Alone make an appearance. It’s good, it’s fun. It will in no way change your life. It won’t win any awards but if you’re just looking for a laugh then this is the film for you. Apparently there’s a 3D bluray of it too but I’m not sure you’d want the bad effects that much in your face. Erp.
James McCulloch GoGuide Magazine Contributor MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 99
DVDREVIEWS
J
W
So it’s a comedy horror with an added hair ball of crazy thrown into the mix. You run around on a bizarre adventure with John (you know, from the title) and Dave, a couple of college drop outs. A new drug called Soy Sauce has hit the street but it just so happens that this drug actually gives its users the ability to perceive alternate dimensions and a non-linear perception of time. Jings.
This film had me sold from the moment it started. I mean who wouldn’t answer an advert like that. Anyway, for the purposes of this film it’s three journalists who answer it. Including that guy from New Girl that’s doing the on/off again thing with Zooey Descanel and Aubrey Plaza from Parks and Recreation. So they go to the small town where this alleged crazy person lives and try to find a way to worm their way into his experiment. As it turns out, the best way is to send in Aubrey. But as the film progresses she begins to get feelings for him and question how crazy he actually is.
ohn Dies At The End is the new film from one of my favourite directors. The outstanding Don Coscarelli, the man responsible for the Phantasm franchise, Bubba Ho-Tep and the Beastmaster. So you may have to excuse me for a moment while I go crazy about how amazing this film is.
Actually it’s kind of hard to put into words what the films about without writing down the entire plot. Basically it involves a naked cult, giant leeches, a missing dog who’s just bitten a giant Jamaican drug dealer, a sentient organic computer, and a woman who explodes into snakes and reforms as a frozen meat monster. Basically all the crazy you’d expect from the guy behind Phantasm and Bubba Ho-Tep. You also have a fine performance from Paul Giamatti added into the mix along with a cameo from the Tall Man himself Angus Scrimm (Boy!). Basically it’s just a whole lot of fun based on the book by Cracked.com writer David Wong. Definitely worth getting and watching so often that you’re brain actually drips out of your nose. The only thing it’s missing is a cameo from Reggie Bannister but we’ll forgive you this time Don. Just hurry up and make Phantasm V already.
anted: Somebody to go back in time with me. This is not a joke. P.O. Box 91 Ocean View, WA 99393. You’ll get paid after we get back. Must bring your own weapons. Safety NOT Guaranteed. I have only done this once before.
Along the way we have Nick from New Girl looking up his ex from back when he was a lad and some awesome moments of Aubrey in training to go through time. Okay there’s a lot more to the film than that. It’s such a great film. It manages to be genuinely enjoyable whilst being a little weird without ever slipping into Donnie Darko or David Lynch territory. The supposed crazy person in question is played by the amazing Mark Duplass who the acts the hell out of the film. Considering most of the cast come from TV they are all phenomenal and give the film a lot of heart. I highly recommend picking this up, even if you’re one of those people who don’t like Aubrey Plaza. Apparently there are some people out there who feel that way but she’s great, the films great. In fact the only thing that could have made this film any better was Rowdy Roddy Piper walking in and exclaiming “I’m here to chew bubble gum and kick ass… And I’m all out of bubble gum”.
James McCulloch GoGuide Magazine Contributor Page 100
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
James McCulloch GoGuide Magazine Contributor
DVD/BLU-RAY REVIEWS MYMHM ? MOVIE
C
aptain Phillips is the telling of the hijacking of the U.S. container ship Maersk Alabama back in 2009 when they were boarded by a small crew of Somali pirates, a group so small that you wonder just why such a massive amount of money is allowed to sail without at least one ‘hired gun’ on board with a high powered sniper rifle and this move probably wouldn’t have happened, but anyway.
Tom Hanks plays Richard Phillips, the captain of the cargo ship making its way from Oman to Kenya when it’s hijacked just off the coast of Somalia and a multi-million dollar ransom is demanded for the return of the men, the ship and its cargo. There are a few hat tips on the back story of the pirates, mainly playing on the understanding that the bad guys don’t have anything else in their future and no way of making a living and that they are only doing what is expected and ordered by whoever is above them. After a fairly gripping start in which Phillips tries to outrun the pirates and then his attempts to hide his crew, things begin to slow to a much slower pace. Eventually the pirates decide to leave in the emergency lifeboat, taking the captain with them, and head off in the hope of reaching their home and still bagging a big ransom. There is enough to keep you watching until the end and the inevitable hero’s rescue. Interesting to note that the ship’s real-life crew actually blame Phillips for the hijacking claiming he was no hero and an arrogant “vainglorious nincompoop”. Probably the best performance from Hanks in the last 10 years but anything would be better than The Ladykillers or that Cloud Atlas thing.
YOU MIG
HT HAV
E MISSE
D
H
ighly decorated homicide detective John Hobbes, played by Denzel Washington, takes his place at the execution of Edgar Reese (Elias Koteas) a serial killer he caught. Before being executed the murderer hits him with one last riddle and a curse delivered in some obscure tongue. Hobbes soon finds himself with feelings of déjà vu when two new murders are committed using Reese’s modus operandi.
Things hinge around what he found at the cabin of a cop who was found dead years before, on the wall was scrawled Azazel (the Aramaic word for evil). After the new murders the dead officer’s daughter Gretta (Embeth Davidtz), a professor in theology, joins Hobbes to confront what appear to be demonic forces behind the things going on. This edgy and enthralling supernatural thriller written by Nicholas Kazan and directed by Gregory Hoblit hints at the theory of the more good you do the more evil seems to affect your life and those around you with Hobbes strength and willpower tested with his brother Art (Gabriel Casseus), his partner Jonesy (John Goodman) and his superior Lt. Stanton (Donald Sutherland). Like a weird version of tag the spirit of Reese appears to be alive and well and passing between various people, who in turn carry out his grizzly murders in the usual fashion. Fallen is an eerie movie with a unique take on the clash between good and evil in which man eventually has to make a stand. “Time Is on My Side.”
Mr Suit GoGuide Magazine Contributor MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
Mr Suit GoGuide Magazine Contributor PAGE 101
GAMES Page 102
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
S MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 103
GAMING CHARTS
THE TOP 10 BOX-OFFICE GAMES FOR PLAYSTATION, XBOX AND PC
PS3
1 THE LEGO MOVIE VIDEOGAME 2 FIFA 14 3 CALL OF DUTY: GHOSTS 4 GRAND THEFT AUTO V 5 GRAN TURISMO 6
6 LIGHTNING RETURNS: FINAL FANTASY XIII 7 LEGO MARVEL SUPER HEROES 8 BATTLEFIELD 4 9 ASSASSIN’S CREED IV: BLACK FLAG 10 RAMBO: THE VIDEO GAME
CALL OF DUTY: GHOSTS
PS4
1 FIFA 14 2 BATTLEFIELD 4
4 RAYMAN LEGENDS
6 THE LEGO MOVIE VIDEOGAME 7 TOMB RAIDER: DEFINITIVE EDITION 8 ASSASSIN’S CREED IV: BLACK FLAG 9 NEED FOR SPEED: RIVALS
5 CALL OF DUTY: GHOSTS
10 KNACK
3 KILLZONE: SHADOW FALL
CALL OF DUTY: GHOSTS
Page 104
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
X-BOX CALL OF DUTY: GHOSTS
X-BOX
ONE
1 THE LEGO MOVIE VIDEOGAME 2 FIFA 14 3 CALL OF DUTY: GHOSTS
6 BATTLEFIELD 4
4 GRAND THEFT AUTO V
9 WWE 2K14
5 LEGO MARVEL SUPER HEROES
10 LIGHTNING RETURNS: FINAL FANTASY XIII
1 FIFA 14 2 BATTLEFIELD 4
6 RAYMAN LEGENDS
3 THE LEGO MOVIE VIDEOGAME 4 FORZA MOTORSPORT 5 5 CALL OF DUTY: GHOSTS
8 RYSE: SON OF ROME
CALL OF DUTY: GHOSTS
PC
7 ASSASSIN’S CREED IV: BLACK FLAG 8 FABLE: ANNIVERSARY
1 FOOTBALL MANAGER 2014 2 BATTLEFIELD 4 3 ROME: TOTAL WAR II 4 THE ELDER SCROLLS V: SKYRIM – LEGENDARY 5 RAMBO: THE VIDEO GAME
7 DEAD RISING 3
9 TOMB RAIDER: DEFINITIVE EDITION 10 ASSASSIN’S CREED IV: BLACK FLAG
6 THE LEGO MOVIE VIDEOGAME 7 GUILD WARS 2 8 THE SIMS 3: STARTER BUNDLE 9 ARMA III 10 ROCKSMITH 2014 EDITION
FOOTBALL MANAGER 2014
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 105
GAMING REVIEW
Page 106
Sam Sheppard GoGuide Magazine Games Contributor
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
O
ur hero Knack, created by a renowned inventor for the sole purpose of fending off the invading goblin tribes, is a collection of hundreds of tiny relics that take form top become Knack. These relics float independently but close to one another so when Knack gets hit, chunks of him fly off and when Knack dies, he remarkably collapses into countless bits that scatter across the floor. Just as easily as they get knocked out of him, Knack can also absorb additional relics, causing him to grow in strength and durability, although these relics don’t come as much as you would really like them too. You’ll play as Knack in a variety of sizes throughout the game’s 13 chapters and it feels a lot longer than it actually is. With little Knack, you could lose your life with one shot, although to compensate, the game typically only has you fight two or three enemies while you’re so puny. Plus after a short while you’ll begin to see a pattern in the enemy’s movements. After gathering enough relics, Knack becomes a giant and enemies that beforehand took numerous hits fall after a single punch; you will however eventually come face to face with tougher enemies. Surprisingly each blow generally takes a large portion of life even with giant Knack which can make the game a wee bit frustrating even when you’re playing on lower difficulties. For a game that has the appearance of a kid’s game, the game isn’t very sympathetic and you ‘will’ die a lot so get used to repeating sections constantly. Oh and it doesn’t matter if you hit any checkpoints, if you quit the game for any reason before completing a level you will start the mission you were on from the beginning. If your situations get a bit out of your control, you can use a super move, which typically kills every enemy in the area. Other than super moves, Knack has few ways to combat his vulnerability. His dodge move feels sluggish and he/she never seems to move as quickly as you want it to. Jumping seems a more effective way to avoid getting demolished. Knack is equally limited when it comes to attacking. You can throw out a 3-punch combo or perform a Sonic the Hedgehog like air move. The AI as I mentioned before, is so predictable, so it isn’t tough guessing when you need swing. Drop-in, drop-out co-op lets a friend assume the role of Robo Knack. He isn’t part of the story in any way, but he’s useful nonetheless since your decreasing the chance of repetition. But there’s one thing your friends can’t stop, and that’s Knack’s interfering cut scenes, which highlight the most insignificant things, such as Knack jumping off a ledge. Why can’t you just jump off the ledge yourself? These scenes do only last for a few seconds, but they pull you out of the game for apparently no reason at all. There are numerous secrets throughout the game which include pieces for upgrades, health, or energy for super moves, that should make the environments a little more stimulating, but they don’t. If anything they only highlight how artificial the game feels. Just look for a portion of the wall that looks dodgy, and then punch the wall, revealing a room that is used for every secret room that you come across. I will admit though that some walls are hard to find so I doubt you’ll find them all in one play through. Knack looks and feels simple and it’s easy to think that it is a game for kids. Other than it’s amazing graphics and engine, it hasn’t really achieved anything else. If you’re looking for a new game for your PlayStation 4, there are better options than Knack.
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 107
GAMING FEATURE
Page 108
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 109
GAMING REVIEW
Page 110
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
T
he Last of Us, our game of the year for 2013, has released its first storydriven DLC, Left Behind. This short, connected story introduces Ellie's best friend Riley, and has players making their way through a part of Ellie's past giving us a true and deeper sense of what she has gone through, and how vulnerable she really is.
The great thing about Left Behind is that during the three hours or so that you'll spend wandering through the mall with Riley, enemy encounters are pretty scarce. The main focus is placed on characters rather
than combat. But developing its characters’ personalities isn't the only thing Left Behind shines at, their world feels more alive, and there are some great signs to the original game. Left Behind shows us Ellie as a more cheery, playful girl. Her easy back and forth banter with Riley is much different than the faith and respect she has when dealing with the elder and snippier Joel. The affection that Ellie and Riley show towards one another fits perfectly with the world and story that The Last of Us so carefully builds, it’s clear that Ellie feels safer, and she value’s their friendship. The environments are denser than before with more chances for interaction. It's hard to resist checking out every nook and cranny, but at the same time you’ll have an urge
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
to continue along with the story. The way you interact with your environments, such as throwing bricks at car windows, taking pictures, and mucking around in a Halloween store are great ways to get you into the world without relying on cut scenes. When situations turn serious, you’ll use bottles to create loud noises to lure the infected into attacking hostile humans, leaving you to deal with the rest. Left Behind is a fantastic addition to The Last of Us. It doesn't just add a few extra hours to the existing campaign; it adds some actual meaning, giving us a new way to play and a strong look into Ellie's distressing past that is essential to any fan of the series. Sam Sheppard GoGuide Magazine Games Contributor PAGE 111
Page 112
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 113
Page 114
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 115
Page 116
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 117
OUTABOUT &
IN WEST LOTHIAN
The Bennie Museum
The Bennie Museum opened in 1989 as a museum of Bathgate’s history and life. It is run entirely by volunteers under the management of a Charitable Trust. It has been commended by the Association of Scottish Visitor Attractions. www.benniemuseum.org.uk 11am - 4pm (Apr to Sep) & 11am -3.30pm (Oct to Mar) - FREE 9-11 Mansefield Street, Bathgate, EH48 4HU 01506 634944
Almond Valley Heritage Trust,
Almond Valley is operated as a popular leisure destination that appeals to a diverse audience and promotes learning through discovery, family interaction and play. We also operate a formal education programme. www.almondvalley.co.uk Millfield, Livingston, EH54 7AR 01506 414957
The Garage Skatepark
The Garage Skatepark is an indoor skatepark based in Livingston which is being improved on constantly to give skaters the best experience around. The park is open to Skateboards ,Inline Skates and BMX. Kids under 16 wanting to ride at the park will be required to wear a helmet. The park also has its very own shop stocking Boards, Wheels, Trucks, T-shirts and other accessories. www.thegarage.zxq.net Mon - Sat: 10am - 10pm - Sun: 10am - 8pm 5D Grange Road, Houston Industrial Estate, EH54 5DE 01506 530892
Bankhead Mountainball
Like many ‘extreme’ sports, Zorbing, Orbing or Sphereing was created in New Zealand back in 1994. The concept is quite simple, you build a human sphere which can accommodate up to two fully grown adults, secure them inside then let them roll down a hill in it (hamsters have been exercised for many years in a very similar way!) www.bankheadmountainball.co.uk Contact for opening hours Bankhead Farm, Dechmont, Broxburn, EH52 6NB 01506 811209
Delta Force Paintball
Delta Force Paintball provides world class paintballing in Scotland. In addition to the scenery, incredible game zones provide players with an adrenalin-fuelled day of paintball action all year round. www.paintballgames.co.uk Weekends + 1 Weekday - check online for details Off Burnhouse Road, Dechmont, Livingston, EH49 6PL 0844 477 5050
Funtastic Fantasy Golf Limited
Miniature golf arena but it’s one with a difference it’s BLACK-LIGHT UV which means that not only do the 3D prop’s glow in the dark but also the golf balls and art work on the wall do too. This facility is a fantastic family day out for all ages & abilities with a cafe that sell homemade food made onsite at their cafe ‘Dino Bites’
Page 118
Mon - Sun: 10:00 am - 10:00 pm 3 St Andrews Way, Livingston, EH54 8HQ 07935 576943
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
A1 PAINTBALL
A1 Paintball was established in 2002 with one goal in mind, giving their customers an open and honest paintball experience from start to finish and with no hidden extras. They provide only the very best and most comprehensive paintballing equipment and event management. Haggs Road Wood Burnwynd, Nr Edinburgh, Midlothian EH27 8ED 01501 741709
Racing Karts
Racing Karts quickly established itself as a force in Indoor Kart Racing due to its attention to safety, cleanliness and customer satisfaction. They like to call themselves ‘The Friendly Circuit’ www.racingkarts.co.uk Times: Booking required - call to arrange Arrol Square, Deans Industrial Estate, Livingston, EH54 8QZ 01506 410123
Livingston Skate Park
The Livingston Skatepark opened in 1981, at a time when most commercial skateparks were closing and was one of the most important facilities in Britain during a critical period in the development of skateboarding. It is an example of a free, unsupervised facility which achieved international status. Daylight access all year round FREE 16 Northwood Park, Opposite Almondvale Shopping Centre, Livingston, EH54 6HR
Deer Park Ten Pin Bowling
Deer Park Bowling Centre is a 16 Lane Bowling Centre with the capacity to hold 128 bowlers. There is a bar and food served throughout. At ‘Late night Glow Bowling’ the lights are dimmed and the lanes come alive with GLOW IN THE DARK, ULTRA VIOLET lighting effects and music. www.deer-park.co.uk Mon-Thur: 4pm-10pm / Fri: 12pm-midnight / Sat: 10am-midnight / Sun: 10am-10pm Golf Course Road, Livingston, EH54 8AB - 01506 446699
Five Sisters Zoo
The Five Sisters Zoo was established in 2005 and is the only wildlife attraction centre in West Lothian. With over 100 different species of animals, birds and reptiles from all around the world your visit will be a fun, enjoyable and educational one - all ages. www.fivesisterszoo.co.uk Open 7 Days a week - 10am - 6pm (5pm Winter half of year) Gavieside, West Calder, EH55 8PT 01506 871 111
Overboard Soft Play
Overboard Soft Play is an exciting indoor Soft Play and entertainment venue for kids aged 0-11 yrs. They have it all, from chutes to ball pits to go-karts to ball cannons. With an underwater theme and seperate play zones for different age groups and abilities, your children are sure to have a great time from the minute they arrive until it’s time to go home. www.overboardsoftplay.com Wed - Sun: 10:15 am - 6:00 pm 3 St Andrews Way, Livingston, EH54 8HQ - 01506 873888
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 119
QUIZ ANSWERS 1 2 3
THE GOG UIDE MUSI C QUIZ
ANSWE SONG CLOUDS RS CLINT EASTWOOD - GORILLAZ KELLY CLARKSON E N O G N E E B U E C SIN R E G N O R T S , R E T S FA , R E HARDER, BETT DAFT PUNK
4
RITUAL White Lies
7
MECHANICAL ANIMALS Marilyn Manson
Page 120
NEVER THE BO MIND LLOCKS IT’S
5
6
GIVE EM ENOUGH ROPE The Clash
8
THE VELVET UNDERGROUND & NICO The Velvet Underground & Nico
9
MODERN LIFE IS RUBBISH Blur
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
BLACKBIRD Alter Bridge
WE GOT
1
MOVIE Q
UIZ
HOLD OF NAME TH THE SCISSORS A G E MOVIE S PLEASE AIN ?
FILTH
2 THE INCREDIBLE BURT WONDERSTONE
3 OZ THE GREAT AND POWERFUL
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)
PAGE 121
CLASSIC MOVIE POSTERS 101
T
he War of the Worlds (also known promotionally as H. G. Wells’ The War of the Worlds) was a 1953 Paramount Pictures Technicolor science fiction film starring Gene Barry and Ann Robinson. It is a loose adaptation of the H. G. Wells classic novel of the same name, and the first of a number of film adaptations based on Wells’ novel. Produced by George Pal and directed by Byron Haskin from a script by Barré Lyndon, it was the first of two adaptations of Wells’ work to be filmed by Pal, and is considered to be one of the great science fiction films of the 1950s. It won an Oscar for its special effects and was later selected for inclusion in the National Film Registry of the Library of Congress. Widely regarded as one of the greatest sci-fi movies of all time, The War of the Worlds delivers eye-popping thrills, laser-hot action and unrelenting, edge-of-your-seat suspense. No one who has seen the film’s depiction of the swan-shaped Martian machines-ticking and hissing menacingly as they cut their path of destruction-will ever forget their ominous impact!
Page 122
MARCH 2014 - issue (37)