Essays of Africa January 2015

ESSAYS A WOMAN’S JOURNEY

OF AFRICA

www.essaysofafrica.com

WHEN TRADITION and CULTURE CLASH

AFRICA’S RICHEST WOMAN

Meet Nigeria’s Folorunso Alakaji

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CONTENTS EOA

inside ESSAYS A WOMAN’S JOURNEY

OF AFRICA

www.essaysofafrica.com

JANUARY 2015

36 Q&A: EOA chats to Ipeleng Mkhari: mother, wife and businesswoman extraordinaire

features

58 WOMEN’S NETWORK: Owami Women makes a difference in women’s lives

64 MONEY: How to beat your budget in January

72 MY JOURNEY: Christabel Hlatshwayo: meet this powerhouse of a woman

52

HAIR & MAKE-UP: PRUDENCE SEGAMI. FASHION: DONNA CLAIRE. ACCESSORIES: ZURI.

MAIN COVER: PHOTOGRAPHER: GARETH JACOBS. STYLING: TUMI MDLULI.

cover stories 43 FASHION: Shop your wardrobe and look sharp at the office 52 PAMELA NOMVETE: Finally she has become the artist she’s always wanted to be 62 SELF-EMPOWERMENT: Entrepreneurship 101: Do you have what it takes to be your own boss?

82 PROFILE: Africa’s richest black woman is worth billions. Read all about her.

people 34 REAL LIFE: “I survived Ebola”

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94 MAN Q&A: Mister Sales, Thaamir Moerat

66 RELATIONSHIPS: Why do people still get married?

68 SEX & INTIMACY: When you have to condomise with your husband 76 HEALTH: Snore, and you sleep alone!

columns

80 PARENTING: Mapaseka Mokweli’s little one is heading to ‘big school’

18 GUEST BLOG: Do bloggers’ opinions really count?

84 NEWS REPORT: We remember the survivors of the devastating Indonesian tsunami of 2004

32 UNCOVERED: Reclaim your young, innocent and fearless self.

70 READER’S CORNER: An EOA reader laments the clash of culture and modern living

88 MAN FEATURE: Lobola negotiations: beautiful tradition or plain greed?

91 #GAYBESTFRIEND: Ruth misses the clear signs of flirting, and her GBF sets her straight 118 THE FINAL WORD: New Year’s resolustions: Who needs them?

84

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J AN UARY 2015

beauty

regulars

96 BEAUTY MAIN: Four of the best spas in Mzansi

7

EDITOR’S LETTER

104 SEXY 7: Best buys this month

8

ON LOCATION

105 HAIR NOTEBOOK: The best ways to moisturise your tresses

9

ONLINE UPDATE

106 INTERVIEW: Vuyo Varoyi is Revlon SA’s first ever national make-up artist

12 LETTERS PAGE

110 BODY BLITZ: Let your lips do the talking with these amazing products

21 EOA SUBSCRIPTION

112

fashion 16 SEXY 7: Best buys this month 20 FASHION NEWS 22

10 CONTRIBUTORS

141 HOROSCOPES 143 STOCKISTS

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39 REAL WOMAN: Meet curvaceous Jacqui Ramakuela 61 ITEM OR OUTFIT: Choose between the designer bag and the gorgeous outfit 92 MAN FASHION: Is your man boardroom ready?

lifestyle 112 FOOD & ENTERTAINING: Bring it on with a braai 122 DÉCOR STYLE FOCUS: Get the luxe beach house look

21

126 DÉCOR NEWS 128 TRAVEL: EOA’s picks of Africa’s best beaches 132 ENTERTAINMENT: SA Idols runner-up Bongiwe Silinda chats to EOA

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134 MOVIES & THEATRE 136 TECH NEWS & APPS 137 BOOKS 138 MOTORING 140 MUSIC

128

ESSAYS OF AFRICA

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CHOPARD BOUTIQUE. V & A WATERFRONT | 021.421.4296 For further information contact Architects of Time (011) 669 0790

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OF AFRICA

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CEO of Kwenta Media & Founding Editor of Essays of Africa

Consulting Managing Editor Deputy Managing Editor Features Writers Fashion Editor Beauty Writer DĂŠcor Writer Food & Entertaining Writer Columnists Contributor Nigeria Contributor International Contributor Proofreader Art Director Designers Design Intern IT Administrators Production Manager Sales Marketing/PR & Events Coordinator Operations & Finance Coordinator Executive PA & Admin Coordinator Advisory Board

Office Drivers

Publisher Physical Address

Postal Address Websites Subscription Queries Advertising Editorial Information & Enquiries Printers Distribution

Nawaal Nolwazi Mdluli

Nadia Goetham Tracy Maher Zama Nkosi, Caryn Thandi Petersen, Hayden Horner, Thina Mthembu, Hlulani Masingi Tumi Mdluli Vuyiswa Mothlabane Rhoda Davids Cheska Stark Ndoni Khanyile, Tumi Morake, Hayden Horner, Beatrice Banda Phindiwe Nkosi Funke Osae-Brown Matteo Fagotto Nicky de Bene Sihle Madlala Lelethu Tobi, Vuyiswa Mothlabane Karabo Maloisane, Siphokazi Masele, Asanda Mazwi Tatenda Zuva, Shelly Mathole, Mpho Mahlo Tumi Mdluli New Business Development Team Mbalenhle Fakude Nuraan Motlekar Antoinett Botha Fazila Bizor, Lindsay Breytenbach, Lindelwa Isabelle, Ndoni Khanyile, Busisiwe Mahlaba, Sen Mdhluli, Moeketsi Mosola, Dr Salifou Siddo, Nthabe Zondo, Sonto Ndlovu Yusuf Msinyi, Gabriel Mashishi

Kwenta Media (Pty) Ltd. Fourways View Office Park, Block C, First Floor, Cnr Sunset Ave and Sunrise Blvd, Fourways Tel: 011 467 5859, Fax: 011 467 2808 Essays of Africa: P.O. Box 4437, Dainfern, 2055 www.essaysofsafrica.com / www.kwentamedia.com subs@essaysofafrica.com advertising@essaysofafrica.com editorial@essaysofafrica.com info@essaysofafrica.com / info@kwentamedia.com

Formeset Printers Cape (Pty) Ltd RNA (Astrid Anderson) Essays Of Africa Magazine, Website and Webzine are 100% owned and publised by Kwenta Media (Pty) Ltd. The editor and publisher reserve the right to alter copy and visual material as deemed necessary.

Copyright by Kwenta Media (Pty) Ltd. All rights reserved.

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ESSAYS OF AFRICA

PAUSE,

ED’S LETTER EOA

reflect & innovate…

PICTURE: KWENTA MEDIA.

A

s I’m writing my second letter to you, I’m sitting in my garden under a beautiful tree that I planted nine years ago.

While gardening recently, I noticed how it had grown, almost uncontrollably, and I was reminded of how it has thrived even when, at times, it seemed as if it is giving up on life.

Its growth over the years has been marked by many changes. At first it was frail and thin, appearing to wither away and die, only to spring back into life. Soon thereafter, it shot into full bloom and continued to flourish to where it is today and, for the first time, providing the loveliest shade.

As I look up to see its green lushness, I’m in awe of how it has withstood the elements to become tall and strong, and the words “keep growing, keep moving” come to mind. Just like this tree that has grown against all odds, we all have to keep growing and evolving.

Continuing to innovate and renew your lease on life, whether in your career, business or family, is inevitable, so I want to urge you to embrace that challenge and see it as a new opportunity to reinvent that which is comfortable and sometimes even stale.

Recently I was faced with a few business challenges and one in particular gave me the opportunity to pause, reflect and innovate. My first reaction was to complain, but then I decided to choose a path that will connect with my heart, my head and then my hands, so I could do what needed to be done and keep moving forward.

That choice was a hard one at first, but now more than ever, I believe that the name change of this magazine from Essence Of Africa to Essays Of Africa is the right one. I only see great things that can grow from this decision, as we continue to feature the stories from the continent.

This month’s issue celebrates new beginnings, including 2015 and the promise it holds for you and me. Our Main Fashion essay on page 22 is a

E SSAYS OF A F R I C A

celebration of traditional style, with a generous sprinkling of modernity. Not forgetting that we are heading back to work in January, see page 42 for the absolute must-have workwear staples that we have hunted down for you.

But before we forget that we are still enjoying the holidays, there are plenty of fun and exciting features in our Lifestyle section, with the best African beaches in the Travel essay on page 128 and recipes for the braai in Food&Entertaining on page 112.

One last but very important thought – a huge thank you to everyone for your well wishes on the launch of this magazine. Please keep sending us your inspirational stories – let’s learn from each other and keep walking this journey of empowerment together.

Nawaal 7

J AN UARY 2015

EOA ON LOCATION

AN ACT OF ARTISTRY

Pamela sitting tight as her make-up is applied.

The Kwenta team making sure no thread is out of place.

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Pamela focusing intently on telling features writer Zama Nkosi how she got her life back together.

Final touches and our cover girl is ready for her moment in front of the lens.

Final touches being done by the make-up artist and stylist for this cover.

ESSAYS OF AFRICA

WORDS: ZAMA NOKOSI. PICTURES: GARETH JACOBS. STYLIST: TUMI MDLULI. MAKE-UP ARTIST: PRUDENCE SEGAMI.

Cover star PAMELA NOMVETE could appreciate allowing other artists, including a photographer and stylist, to do what they do best – creating the perfect cover!

ONLINE UPDATE EOA

DIGITALLY

savvy

INNOVATIVE Essence Of Africa website has migrated to the new Essays Of Africa. Go to Essaysofafrica.com and tell us what you think. We love hearing from you.

TOP-NOTCH CONTENT We present you with fresh weekly content that will cover everything from thought-provoking essays, cutting-edge fashion and beauty news, to the latest lifestyle trends and tips. Our team is working around the clock to bring you new content.

ALL ACCESS GRANTED Essays Of Africa offers engaging content that is mobifriendly, easy to navigate and available on all gadgets from android and smartphones, to tablets and laptops.

SOCIAL NETWORK You name the platform and Essays Of Africa is live everywhere. Find us on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter now and join the community.

JOIN THE EOA FAMILY Register online to receive our weekly newsletter and help grow this community of women who are passionate about Africa and its stories. Our database is growing steadily with more than 40 000 members. Don’t be left behind; come and join us.

PICTURES: KWENTA MEDIA.

CELEB NEWS Get our behind-the-scenes coverage of the fashion and beauty shoots, and the latest news from Celebville.

SUBSCRIBE Subscribe to our digital and print offerings. Go to Essaysofafrica.com or Mysubs.co.za for more info. E E SSAY S OF A F R I C A

9

J AN UARY 2015

EOA CONTRIBUTORS

the dream team

2015,

lelethu tobi

here

WE COME!

I want to spend more time with my family and friends, and to enjoy life more. Since my life is so hectic and stressful, I want to try and get out more often and try out new things like baking. Yum!

tracy maher

DEPUTY MANAGING EDITOR

”

10

I don’t believe in making sweeping statements where I know I’m just setting myself up for failure. Who needs another reason to feel bad about themselves, right? What I can work on in the New Year, and every other day, are the following: be kind, work hard, stay humble, smile often (this I need to work on, I know), stay loyal, keep honest, travel when possible (this one too), never stop learning, be thankful always, and love.

WRITER

caryn thandi petersen

Forget giving up chocolate and getting super-hot abs, because it’s just never going to happen. 2015 is all about saying “yes!” for me. Yes to Sunday afternoon walks, yes to decadent dinner parties and talking till dawn over endless glasses of red wine, yes to Pilates for building core strength and yes to spending more time with my grandparents.

ESSAYS OF AFRICA

WORDS AND PICTURES: EOA TEAM

“

Is your New Year’s resolution not to make those promises to yourself and then fail halfway through January?

Some of our team members share their resolutions.

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DESIGNER

Gentle hydration with ocean minerals for refreshed and revitalised skin.

ŽTrademark Š Johnson & Johnson (Pty) Ltd 2014. Talk to us on sharecall 0860 410032, email jnjza@its.jnj.com or sms jnj & comment to +27 83 293 3273.

Your letters THE RIGHT THING AT THE RIGHT TIME I thought of how timely and needed this magazine was when I recently received an invitation from a friend to meet for an intimate women’s heart-to-heart. I was immediately suspicious, just as you mentioned in the first paragraph of your editor’s letter of the December 2014 issue. It turned out that I had no reason to be – the night turned out to be an amazing evening of women opening up and expressing their struggles, inspiration, aspirations and triumphs, and making new friends!

Hulisani Thabela

A UNIQUE VOICE It truly is humbling and yet overwhelming to have such a magazine here in South Africa, one that speaks to every woman in such a unique way. I loved the first edition, and as someone who enjoys great reads and a dash of fashion trends, I hope that the next one will be just as good. I wish the team all the best! We appreciate all your hard work!

Bree Simelane

CONGRATULATIONS ALL ROUND! Xoliswa Dungane – Congratulations on a roaring first issue. Looking at the responses, it is everything you dreamt of and then some. I pray for your continued success and good health. With love and admiration!

Phumula Mathebula – A good beginning and greater things will follow. Nawaal, you are one of our own conquering the unconquerable media industry. All the best, sister!

Ayesha Bhabha – Simply awesome and dynamic! Great effort and god bless you always!

Thuli Sithole – Congratulations! Many more amazing profiles and features to come, I’m sure! 2015 is the year for greatness; you and the team deserve it!

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ESSAYS OF AFRICA

LETTERS EOA

SOCIAL MEDIA Would you date a man who wouldn’t spend money on you for the first 90 days of the relationship? Yes, No, Maybe? Why? #90DaysRuleReversed #TalkingRelationships Hlulani Riva Masingi – I would not! He must show from the beginning that he can be a provider, a protector and the epitome of permanence from the beginning, from a mental, social and financial perspective – Gloria Mthethwa – No, it’s an absolute nonnegotiable, and to test him I wouldn’t contribute a dime. LOL Zaziwe Moyo – I’m old school, so NO! Gugulethu Makama – Likening a man’s wallet to a woman’s virtue and right is dangerous. If we agree his money is his strength upfront, then we can both wait for 90 days. Trust me, I won’t be waiting past day two. #JustSaying

LOVE & MARRIAGE?

According to annual The Female Nation Survey conducted by Women.24: 87% of women still believe in marriage.

5% unequivocally do not believe in it. > 50% meet dates through friends and family.

1 out of 7 use dating websites.

Where did you meet your partner? What are your thoughts on dating and marriage?

Share your thoughts with us on @Essence_Africa or letters@essayofsafrica.com.

s t e e w T e

! e v lo w

Magazine @datmagazinelife We’re always on the look out for new African magazines, so check out @Essence_Africa. #newmag Helene Niewenhuis @Helene_Nieuw “We want African women to dictate the content” @Essence_Africa @maggsonmedia #magazines #glossy #PowerWeek POWER987 @Powerfm987 “We’ve realised that there is a huge gap in black African content” @Essence_Africa @maggsonmedia #magazines #POwerWeek #glossy eNCA @eNCAnews“There is a gap for black African content” @Essence_Africa on @ maggsonmedia looks at a brand new magazine – today at 12:30. #DSTV403 Kaya FM 95.9 @kayafm95dot9 @ KwentaMedia has launched a new magazine.

This is how @Essence_Africa represents the modern black woman. Read here bit.ly/ eoalaunch Leboganag Shole @MmeShole Essence of Africa. Let’s Journey Together! Got my copy.

Do you have yours? @n_mot @Essence_ Africa FreebessPR Girl @FreebessPRGirl Loving the launch issue of @Essence_Africa stunning!

Well done!

Lebo Keswa @LeboKeswa Very impressed by @Essence_Africa and proud of #NawaalMotlekar. Get your copy of this new mag. It’s worth it!

CurvaceousLife&Style @CurvaceousSA NEW MAGAZINE: I’m featured in th fab new mag @Essence_Africa. Get it now in stores! #curvy #realwoman #style

We would love to hear your views, news and especially your feedback on the magazine. Email us at letters@essenceafrica.com or post your comments on Facebook.com/essenceafrica

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J AN UARY 2015

Contact us | News | Advertise with us | Subscribe

Women on a Journey

Fashion & Beauty

Relationships & Sex

Buying A New Car?

Visit our NEW website

Lifestyle

Celebrities & News

Uncovered: Chats

SizweNtsalubaGoboda To Celebrate Bubbles In 2015

Bridging the fibre gap

Summer flings! Summer fun!

www.essaysofafrica.com

EOA FASHION

SEXY

3 Seven TUMI MDLULI’s favourite fashion picks for January will have you drooling.

PRINTED DRESS, R3 600, KAREN MILLEN. Cute and flirty, this dress can easily transition from day to night-time in no time.

2

RED AND TURQUOISE SCARF, R1 100, Tomy Hilfiger @ Stuttafords.

Perfect for chilly summer nights.

WHITE AND GOLD WATCH WITH DIAMANTÉ DETAIL, R1 999, JUST CAVALLI AT JP TIME. Ring in the New Year with some serious bling.

whe at w

love!

7

5 6

NUDE PEEP-TOE HEEL, R799, Woolworths. Strut your stuff in a pair of these earthy, yet super-sexy heels.

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MULTI-COLOURED NECKPIECE, R499, ZARA. Nothing says “summer” quite like this vibrant necklace.

RED SLING BAG, R1 600,Pringle @ Stuttafords. This beauty will give any outfit the pop of colour it needs.

4 GOLD AND TURQUOISE EARRINGS, R995, Kaika Jewellery. The perfect pair of earrings to round of your NewYear’s eve outfit.

ESSAYS OF AFRICA

PICTURES: SUPPLIED BY STOCKISTS.

1

CELEBRATE YOUR UNFORGETTABLE MOMENTS

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I write what I like too…

i

BEATRICE BANDA defends her own – and everyone else’s – right to blog.

write what I like.” These words by the legendary Steve Biko is the reason why I write. I have loved words ever since my high school friend Karabo wrote a poem about me that described why I inspire him.

He couldn’t understand why I couldn’t see this characteristic in myself and thought the poem would help enlighten me. Well, that poem was an eye-opener in more ways than one; firstly, I started believing in myself as an inspiration to others and, secondly, I began to understand the power of words.

I write about fashion and lifestyle issues because I love all things fashionable and unique. For many years I yearned for a platform where I could share my opinion and express my passion for these issues, in the hopes of inspiring someone out there with a kind word, a cute outfit and a style tip. And that’s why I blog – to share my thoughts and opinions but also to be that inspiration to others.

The detractors of blogging think it’s all just pretty pictures, great (or not so great) layouts and words thrown together in cyberspace. Often we are not taken seriously, because people believe blogging is an easy job and really just boils down to unwarranted opinions being published without a filter.

But I beg to differ. Bloggers do work hard! Blogging requires money, time, research and dedication – much like any other job. Content driven by pictures needs great photography/ photographers. We have to dig deep to pay photographers for

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good quality images. For me, using a smartphone to snap those sexy heels is not an option, no matter how top of the range it is (#justsaying). Producing a successful blog requires meticulous media planning, attention to detail, hours of editing and proofing, and let’s not forget the all-important curation of the blog to provide the reader with a wonderful, fresh experience.

Yes, people, this is a serious business that needs nurturing and smart management.

Right now my biggest challenge is to reach as many people in Africa as possible via my blog. According to the website Internet World Stats, only 8,6 percent of all internet users are on the African continent. Not only is access in remote areas non-existent, but more often than not, access is expensive with slow connections. This in turn influences how content – whether it’s my fashion and lifestyle blog or the local government website – is being viewed. As Africans we should work together to fast-track internet access, which will go a long way in ensuring that our beautiful continent flourishes.

By increasing the access to information we will be able to share our opinions for others to comment on, debate about and agree to disagree. I believe we should encourage people to speak their minds and to write what they like. So raise your voice.

FIND BEATRICE ON:

Twitter.com/beatricebanda_ Facebook.com/beatricebandablog Instagram.com/beatricebanda_

ESSAYS OF AFRICA

PICTURES: BISOUWNATASHA.COM; SHIRLEYSWARDROBE.COM; TEETEEISWITHME.COM; PHOTOGRAPH SUPPLIED

BLOGGER COLUMM EOA

BEATRICE’S FAVOURITE BLOGS

Shirleyswardrobe.com:

Shirley B. Eniang is Nigerian and based in London, from where she runs her blog and her YouTube channel. I love how she transforms her outfits on video.

Teeteeiswithme.com:

If you’re looking for truly unique fashionforward content, check out Thithi Nteta’s blog. She is a true supporter of girl power!

Bisousnatasha.com:

This South African lives in the United Kingdom – and I just love her style and chic demeanour.

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J AN UARY 2015

EOA FASHION NEWS

HERE COMES THE OAKFIELD BRIDAL EXPO

Featuring more than 150 wedding specialists, a spectacular fashion show and over R175 000 in prizes each day, this event is guaranteed to leave you feeling inspired to plan your perfect wedding. Save the dates for a fantastic day out with your gorgeous bridesmaids and the love of your life (if you can twist his rubber arm), and experience first-hand all the amazing activities on offer. If you’re planning on tying the knot this year, this is the place to be. For more information, go to Bridalexpo.co.za or call 011 933 3464.

Where: Oakfield Farm When: 24 and 25 January 2015 Time: 10am to 5pm Entry: R100 per adult and R50 per child between ages 6 and 14

Click to shop at Anni King WORDS: THINA MTHEMBU. SOURCES: PRWEB.COM. PICTURES: SUPPLIED BY BRIDALEXPO.CO.ZA; ANNIKING.COM; FFFWEEK.COM.

Now you can sit at your desk, without breaking a sweat or a heel, and log on to Anniking.com to get your hands on your favourite luxury handcrafted leather bag from Anni King by Joanna Chen. Founder and lead designer Joanna was raised in South Africa, and her design philosophy is to embrace her feminine power without ever compromising her femininity. For more information or to shop the collection online, go to Anniking. com. Free delivery.

BRIDAL SHOE GLAMOUR

Vuyi Shoes and Sam Star have collaborated and from the union was born Vuyi Bridal Shoes, with the design philosophy of “bridal glamour”. These are bridal shoes with an attitude – think show-stopper embellishments and adornments that allow any bride to put her best foot forward… literally.

All the shoes in the Vuyi Bridal collection were made from the finest leather and are encrusted with delicate crystals. Vuyi Bridal Shoes are affordable, yet they do not compromise on style. It is a limited edition collection of stylish leather ladies footwear. There are only a few pairs of every colour in every style, so they are pretty much exclusive for the bride who’s looking for a unique bridal shoe that's comfortable and that can still be worn long after the wedding. E

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ESSAYS OF AFRICA

Subscribe to 12-MONTHS OF PRINT MAGAZINE FOR only R300!

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12-MONTHS OF DIGITAL MAGAZINE just R210!

Go to www.essaysofafrica.com or www.mysubs.co.za.

GOLD DISK EARRINGS, R120, ZURI; GOLD BANGLE R100, GOLD BEADED NECKPIECE, R150, SPIKED GOLD NECKPIECE, R200, GOLD RING, R65, ALL FROM POSH SA; BLACK AND GREEN LONG DRESS, R2 500, AFRICA FASHION HOUSE; GOLD SANDALS, R1 850, CASTELO; GOLD BELT, MODEL’S OWN.

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ESSAYS OF AFRICA

FASHION EOA

JUXTAPOSE THE URBAN GRIT OF ALEXANDRA FORMS THE PERFECT BACKDROP AS TUMI MDLULI MIXES VIBRANT TRADITIONAL AFRICAN PRINTS WITH CHIC MODERNITY.

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J AN UARY 2015

DIAMANTÉ NECKLACE, R390, GOLD BRACELET, R280, BOTH FROM ZURI; GREEN AND GOLD BOOB TUBE TOP, R450, MAROON BALL SKIRT, R750; BOTH FROM AFRICA FASHION HOUSE; PRINTED CLUTCH WITH MATCHING HEELS, R900, BOTH FROM NEEMA COLLECTION.

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ESSAYS OF AFRICA

FASHION EOA

GOLD HEADPIECE, EDITOR’S OWN; NECKLACE, R150, POSH SA; CUFF, R180 ZURI; BLACK BODY SUIT, R500, SISSY BOY AT STUTTAFORDS; BROWN PEACOCK SKIRT, R600, GELIDELI FASHION; BROWN GLADIATOR HEELS, R2 850, CASTELO.

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J AN UARY 2015

DENIM DRESS WITH PRINTED DETAIL,R600, SET OF EARRINGS, ARMBAND AND PUMPS (NOT IN PICTURE), R600, ALL FROM NEEMA COLLECTION.

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ESSAYS OF AFRICA

FASHION EOA

GOLD HOOP EARRINGS, R65, WHITE NECKPIECE WITH GOLD DETAIL, R150, BOTH FROM POSH SA; LEGEND PRINTED DRESS, R900, DEFINE AT STUTTAFORDS; WHITE SANDALS, R1 850, CASTELO.

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J AN UARY 2015

EARRINGS, R150, ZURI; RED SHIRT WITH FRILLS, R450, PEACOCK PRINTED SKIRT, R600, BOTH FROM LEBOMASH; GOLD HEELS, R1 850, CASTELO; GOLD BELT AND HEADSCARF, BOTH MODEL’S OWN.

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ESSAYS OF AFRICA

FASHION EOA

HEADSCARF, R150, EARRINGS, R180, BOTH FROM ZURI; ORANGE MAXI DRESS, R3 600, TED BAKER AT STUTTAFORDS; GOLD NECKPIECE, R200, POSH; ARMBAND, R100, POSH SA; SHOES, MODEL’S OWN.

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J AN UARY 2015

GOLD HOOP EARRINGS, R65, MULTICOLOURED NECKPIECE, R200, BLACK AND WHITE ARMBAND, R100, ALL FROM POSH SA; LACE BODYSUIT, R500, SISSY BOY AT STUTTAFORDS; ORANGE PENCIL SKIRT, R650, AFRICA FASHION HOUSE.

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ESSAYS OF AFRICA

FASHION EOA

WHITE SHIRT, R699, POLO; HIGH-WAISTED BLUE PANTS, R550, AFRICA FASHION HOUSE; YELLOW HEADSCARF, R299, ZARA.

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J AN UARY 2015

EMBRACE YOUR SELF CONFIDENT

BY NDONI KHANYILE

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ESSAYS OF AFRICA

UNCOVERED EOA

Ndoni Khanyile, on all the photographs, says she was fearless as a child and would boldly take on any challenge.

PICTURES: SUPPLIED BY NDONI KHANYILE.

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or as long as I can remember I’ve always been drawn to water.

Whether it was a swimming pool at a friend’s house, the river running through the town where my grandmother lived, or the mighty ocean, I loved to just sit and watch its movement and varying temperaments. I am named for a stone that is found in rivers (iNdoni yamanzi) so it seems this connection to water has always been a part of me.

I soon realised that I was no longer content to simply look at the water I so loved; I wanted to be in it, submerge myself in it and play. At around the age of five trying to get into water was a slightly complicated undertaking as my parents couldn’t swim, my brother, Phakade, and I had not started lessons at school, and my oldest brother, who could swim, was away at boarding school. I watched other kids swimming at friends’ houses and it seemed easy enough so I formulated a plan. I borrowed a swimming costume from an older friend and some inflatable water wings, waited for a moment when no one was around and just jumped right in.

My mother still tells the story of how her fearless five-year-old taught herself to swim.

For me it was the most natural thing in the world. It hadn’t occurred to me that I couldn’t or shouldn’t do it.

At this time I hadn’t yet learned to be afraid of the unknown. And then it changed around the age of 14 when the opinions and

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'Think back to the time when you looked at yourself in the mirror and noticed everything you liked first.

When life was about learning and fun.

expectations of others gained prominence, and for the first time I started thinking in terms of what I couldn’t do and what I didn’t have.

And at that age th list was all powerful – with long hair, skinny legs and a boy that liked me topping it.

This is a habit that I’ve only recently begun to shake. We spend so much time telling ourselves that we need to lose weight before we can do this, or get more experience before we can accomplish that. We are always on the way to some distant destination where happiness, success and fulfillment lie in wait instead of fully owning where we’ve been and where we now stand.

So before you make your New Year’s resolutions of how to get thin, get ahead or get anything else, how about taking a moment to look back. Back to that time in your life when doubting yourself and your abilities didn’t come so easily. Think back to the time when you looked at yourself in the mirror and noticed everything you liked first. When life was about learning and having fun. I’d love to meet that five-year-old girl again. I’d tell her how much I appreciate her and that everything she was in that moment was everything she needed and more.E

LET’S SHARE

Email letters@essaysofafrica.com and tell us the age you remember being your most fearless and confident, and why you think it changed as you got older.

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“I survived EBOLA”

COMPILED BY FUNKE ADETUTU. PICTURES: DR ADA IGONOH; ©iStock.com

Amid the thousands of people dying from Ebola, there are a few who, despite contracting this disease, still emerge unscathed. Dr Ada Igonoh is one of those lucky few. This is her story.

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REAL LIFE EOA

I

was on duty at First Consultant Medical Centre, in Lagos, Nigeria, when Patrick Sawyer, a local librarian, was wheeled into the emergency room wracked by fever and weakness. His symptoms were typical of malaria, and so we treated him for the disease. Despite having recently returned from a visit to Liberia, the region hardest hit by the Ebola outbreak, he insisted he hadn’t made contact with any Ebola patients. However, by the next day we were convinced he had Ebola. We immediately alerted the Ministry of Health and put in place the necessary quarantine measures. Regardless of our best efforts, Patrick passed on 25 July, making him Nigeria’s first known case.

It was a sobering day for the medical team as we tried to recall how much physical contact we each had had with Patrick. We were also under constant surveillance by the World Health Organization (WHO) and local Centre for Disease Control (CDC).

A week after Patrick died, and to escape the demands of my job, I visited my parents for a short break. Although safe in the knowledge that I’d followed safety protocol, except once when I touched Patrick’s intravenous rehydration bag without gloves, I monitored myself for symptoms. The anxiety was overwhelming as news of the outbreak dominated media channels and everyday conversation.

A Desperate Situation

I did my best to reassure my parents and myself that my contact with Patrick was minimal, even as I developed a sore throat and muscles, which I attributed to stress. Soon my appetite faded, my joint and muscle pain worsened, and my temperature reached 37.8°C. Trying my best to hide my panic, I prepared my parents for the inevitable, and immediately took precautions to avoid infecting them.

By the next day, my temperature was 39°C and I was vomiting and had diarrhoea, enough to alert the WHO team who, after running a series of tests, admitted me to a medical facility in Yaba where they confirmed I had the virus. I called my mother from the hospital and said: ‘Mummy, they say I have Ebola. Don’t worry, I will survive. Now lock my room and don’t let anyone inside.”

The state of the medical facility was appalling. The ward reeked of faeces and vomit. Food was placed at the door by staff too afraid to come into contact with us. The toilet did not work; forcing everyone to use a bucket as our diarrhoea became chronic. Upon entering the women’s ward, I recognised a ward maid from the hospital where I worked. She always had a smile for me, but not this time. She was really ill. Not long

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after, the team brought in another woman called Justina, who was the nurse that assisted Patrick with his intravenous drip when he ripped it out and splattered blood on her hands. She was pregnant and losing her baby due to the Ebola infection.

Despite all of us being on a range of treatment, including paracetamol for the fever and an oral rehydration solution to combat the effects of the diarrhoea, our conditions worsened by the day. The ward maid died a few days later, and Justina soon after.

Love And Support

There are five strains of the virus and the deadliest of them is the Zaire strain, which was the one I had contracted. But that did not matter. I believed I would overcome it. Infected patients usually die six to 16 days after contracting the disease, from multiple organ failure and shock caused by dehydration.

With this knowledge, I forced myself to drink the oral rehydration solution. I simply refused to die alone in that unhygienic ward.

Friends and family would call to check up on me, and my husband, despite only seeing me through a window, would visit and bring me toiletries and little creature comforts to make my stay more tolerable. The days that followed saw an improvement in my condition and as my symptoms started to fade, my hope grew stronger.

On Saturday 16 August 2014, the WHO doctors arrived with some documents and informed me that I had tested negative for the Ebola virus. I was given a chlorine bath to disinfect me, and then led to the lawn outside the centre to be reunited with my family.

I don’t have all the answers to the nagging questions of life. Why do some die and some survive? Why do bad things happen to good people? All I know is that I walked through the valley of the shadow of death and came out unscathed. E

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Courage

IPELENG MKHARI is a shining beacon of what can be achieved if you fuel your passion with hard work. NEO MADITLA finds out more about this powerhouse of a businesswoman.

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PICTURES: MOTSENG INVESTMENT HOLDINGS.

TIME, SACRIFICE &

Q&A EOA

From left, Nkhensani Nkosi, Masechaba Lekalake, Ipeleng and Lynda Marthinus at Motseng Investment Holdings’ Woman’s Day event last August.

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ell our readers, who is Ipeleng Mkhari and how you ended up in business?

I’m a passionate entrepreneur and have been in business for 17 years. I’m also a proud mother of three girls, a wife, and a daughter of Africa. A year after completing my undergraduate degree at the then University of Natal, I moved to Joburg and worked for an electronic security business. I established the BEE entity and became the marketing director for 12 months.

After resigning in December 1997, I noticed a gap in the market for black women-owned electronic security service providers and I established Phosa Iliso CCTV. In September 1998 I was approached by a school mate to partner with him and a few friends to establish Motseng Investment Holdings.

Your Mozambican subsidiary, Comserv, recently won the 2014 Vodacom Business Partner of the Year Award. What does that mean to you?

I’m extremely proud of our team in Mozambique. The leadership and commitment to provide excellent service to our clients is always key in our business. However, being recognised by our client is a massive accolade and great recognition for the hard work.

Who is Ipeleng Mkhari away from the office?

I’m a wife and mom to three wonderful girls, and my family is my world. I’m the eldest of three girls and I’m extremely close to my siblings. I’m very involved with my girls and my time with them is usually at home or supporting their school activities. It’s also important for me to have quality downtime with my siblings and friends.

You started Motseng at 23. How have you found the journey so far?

Yes, I started Motseng at a young age because I had identified a gap in the market whilst working for my previous employer.

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The electronic security industry was, and I suppose still is, white male dominated and I wanted to capture some of that market share for black women. The 17-year journey has been very rewarding, challenging and full of sacrifices along the way. It’s not difficult to start a business, but it’s very hard work to sustain it.

What is it that keeps you going, especially while operating in environments where you know you’re the first black woman at that level?

Being a pioneer comes with its own challenges but also with great opportunities. Some of the key driving factors for me have been the focus and success of exposing and identifying young black talent, especially women, in the industry. Motseng was at the forefront of introducing and training black female super regional centre managers for our clients and we’ve also been involved in the establishment of the Women’s Property Network Education Trust. My goal is to ensure that the industry has visible and credible transformation at all levels of the industry.

How would you describe your management style?

I would describe myself as an inspirational, detail-oriented and involved leader in most respects. I’ve been the COO for over five years and recently was appointed as CEO of Motseng. I have an open-door policy that allows for transparent communication.

What needs to be done to get more black women interested and involved in business?

Starting a business requires courage and sacrifice, and I believe in a solid education foundation for anyone who wants to be an entrepreneur.

What is your advice to all the unemployed 23-year-olds who want to start their own business, but have no capital, or are just fearful?

For an unemployed young person I would strongly suggest

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starting a small business and keeping it simple. The biggest challenge with being an entrepreneur is that it takes time, sacrifice and courage – all the attributes most young people have in abundance.

You are married to Given Mkhari, who is also one of the country’s first black media moguls. How did you two meet and what keeps your relationship strong, especially since you both have demanding careers?

Given and I met at my first radio interview where he was the interviewer. At the time we were both very committed to our entrepreneurial careers. As a couple and parents we have a wonderful relationship and mutual respect for one another. Parenting is a challenge, however, especially with our business commitments.

Where is your favourite travel destination, and what is the first thing you do when you get there?

I love both Mozambique and Paris, and when I go there I spend time outdoors so I can soak up everything.

What lies ahead for you in 2015?

In my business the focus will be on extending our reach in South Africa and other countries in Africa, and on the parenting side, and specifically as a working parent, I will be focusing on supporting and understanding everyone’s needs to ensure that my children flourish. E

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Ipeleng’s company, Motseng Investment Holdings’ Woman’s Day event's theme was ’Lean In: Women, Work and the Will to Lead’.

ESSAYS OF AFRICA

CREDITS: PICTURES: MOTSENG INVESTMENT HOLDINGS

EOA Q&A

REAL WOMAN EOA

ON THE job

JACQUI RAMAKUELA embraces her African roots with enthusiasm and she can usually be seen wearing African-inspired prints and bold colours. She put fashion editor TUMI MDLULI to the test when she asked her to style her in five outfits that reflect a more demure office look.

CLIENT COCKTAIL PARTY Earrings, R120, Zuri; black and gold neckpiece, R180, Zuri; black jumpsuit with belt, R599, Truworths; metallic gold jacket, R1 025; Woolworths; black and gold clutch, Model’s own; shoes, R625, Woolworths.

As the Africa legislation specialist at Sage VIP Payroll & HR, Jacqui Ramakuela is intrigued by what the continent has to offer, especially on the fashion front. She has no problem sharing her opinions on the matter on her fabulous blog, Missjacqs.blogspot.com. Her inspiration, she says, is found in everything from the township streets with no names to those young, ambitious African brothers and sisters from all over the continent who follow their dreams until they become reality.

Her obsession with African fashion is fuelled by bold African prints, beautiful head wraps, and black and white photography that depict the continent in all its glory.

Mother to little Adaobi, she says her favourite things in the world include indulging in Moscato, a sweet Italian dessert wine, and a slab of dark chocolate almost every Sunday – the sweetest taboo ever, she says.

The most important lesson life has taught her is that: “Time is precious, use it wisely and make things happen.”

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CLIENT

Meeting Black neckpiece, R80, Mr Price; black jacket, R420, Truworths; white lace top, R299, xxxxxxxxxx, black and white wrap skirt, R325, black heels, R625, all from Woolworths.

NETWORKING

Dinner

Gold earrings, R180, Zuri; black cocktail dress, R675, Donna Claire; box purse, R350, Forever New; black shoes, R625, Woolworths.

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REAL WOMAN EOA

Staff

Recruitment Earrings and neckpiece set, R280, Zuri; black top, R320, white jacket, R450, both from Truworths; printed white skirt, R260, Donna Claire, purple wedges, R999, Woolworths.

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MONDAY

Management Earrings, R80, Jacqui’s own; neckpiece, R120, Mr Price; black fitted dress, R600, Donna Claire; gold cuff, R120, Zuri; red heels, R425, Woolworths.

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LIVE YOUR

PASSION

LADIES WORLD HEART FEDERATION Support Hearts of Children Charity campaign with Inès Sastre and the World Heart Federation.

We donate US$ 50 for each Double Heart Beat watch sold.

More information call 011.669.0500 or visit www.frederique-constant.co.za

FASHION EOA

WORK YOUR

Wardrobe

You’re talented, ambitious and ready for any work challenge, and now you have to look the part, too. TUMI MDLULI shopped the stores for those classic staples that every career woman should have in her wardrobe.

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Shopping Navy sleeveless shirt with frill detail, R1 299, Polo.

White short sleeve shirt, R2 500, Karen Millen.

Printed blue blouse, R400, Charter Club at Edgars.

Cream V-neck shirt, R2 500 Karen Millen.

SEXY AND STRUCTURED

If you don’t own a crisp white shirt, or at least one in your favourite colour and cut, go get one right now.

Navy and white stripe chiffon blouse, R1 099, Polo.

Cream shirt with pearl embellishment, R2 100, Ted Baker.

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Navy short sleeveless shirt, R750, Diane.

Black and white blouse R2 100, Ted Baker.

ESSAYS OF AFRICA

Pencil skirt with tulip print, R1 940, Jigsaw.

Pink floral suit skirt, R999, Polo.

Black, white and grey printed flare skirt, R4 500, Karen Millen.

Black and white stripe skirt, R300, Kelso at Edgars.

DON’T SKIRT THE ISSUE

From the pencil skirt to the flared variety, skirts form an essential part of any working woman’s wardrobe.

Black and white broad stripe skirt, R999, Witchery @Woolworths.

Lime with black pencil skirt, R2 300, Ted Baker.

ESSAYS OF AFRICA

Black lace skirt, R5 600, Karen Millen.

Black and white short wrap around skirt, R2 200, Karen Millen.

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Shopping

Black pants with trim, R459, Zara.

Army green pants, R559, Zara.

If you love wearing high-waist trousers, make sure to go with the straight or flared cut, and pair it with a broad belt to show off your cinched waist.

Grey pants, R2 900, Karen Millen.

EMPOWERED IN PANTS

Keep it simple and extra chic with well-tailored pants. You have yours, right?

Black trousers, R2 100, Ted Baker.

Black and white pants, R2 000, Karen Millen.

Low-waist trousers look great when they are body hugging and accessorised with a narrow belt.

Orange formal trousers, R2 300, Ted Baker.

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FASHION EOA

Crisp white dress, R2 700, Ted Baker.

Pink shift dress, R2 554, Jigsaw.

Chevron stripe dress, R499, Kelso at Edgars.

Black and white dress, R480, Kelso at Edgars.

DRESS FOR SUCCESS

Go for quiet formality or relaxed chic in one of these stylish numbers.

Black and white stripe dress, R3 600, Karen Millen.

ESSAYS OF AFRICA

Black short sleeve dress, R759, Zara.

White dress with front detail, R999, Witchery @ Woolworths.

Bracelet sleeve dress, R1 399, Polo at Stuttafords.

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Shopping

White blazer, R4 000, Ted Baker.

Black and white suit jacket, R1 399, Zara.

Nude pink jacket, R4 200, Ted Baker.

SLIP IT ON

Boardroom Mondays require a smarter look and what better way to formalise your look than with a jacket?

Dark blue and grey jacket with zip detail, R4 500, Karen Millen.

Pink blazer, R3 200, Ted Baker.

Dark blue blazer, R1 399, Zara.

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ESSAYS OF AFRICA

FASHION EOA Yellow daffodil, R2 400, AnniKing.

Robyn’s floral bomb, R2 950, Missibaba.

White tote bag, R400, Woolworths.

Black and white Delaney bag, R1 499, Guess.

IN THE BAG

Clutches or slings? Whatever your taste in bags, you can round off your office look with one of these choices.

Patent blue sling bag with gold chain, R349, Queue.

Desert satchel bag, R2 299, Guess.

Orange handbag, R499, Studio W at Woolworths.

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Shopping Black suede heel, R499, Call It Spring.

Nude green heel, R2 700, Ted Baker.

Polkadot heel slingback, R399, Woolworths.

Studded black heels, R2 250, Castelo.

SHOES FOR EVERY TASTE

The right shoe can add a finishing touch to any office outfit or work event... Not to mention elicit envious glances from your colleagues.

Bronze heel, R2 800, Karen Millen.

Black heels, R899, Jessica Simpson at Edgars.

Black/white mini stiletto, R350, Bronx.

Venom black pump, R1 200, AnniKing.

Brandy red heel, R350, Bronx.

Nude pink heel, R2 500, Ted Baker.

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ESSAYS OF AFRICA

FASHION EOA

Gold and diamantĂŠ bracelet, R520, Edgars.

Liendo gold earrings, R150, Forever New.

Notepad pouch, R2 600, Missibaba.

Large black frame sunglasses, R600, Woolworths.

Bulova watch, R9 000, JP Time.

Gold earrings, R400, Lucky at Edgars.

THE FINAL TOUCH

Take your pick of these fab accessories to round off your office look.

Cream, white and grey shawl, R5 200, Karen Millen.

Floral scarf, R1 100, Ted Baker.

PICTURES: SUPPLIED BY STOCKISTS AND PHOTOGRAPHER GARETH JACOBS

Gold necklace with green pendant.

R1 450, Kaika Jewellery.

Belt with bow detail, R1 100, Ted Baker.

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COVER STORY EOA

In control of her art IT’S BEEN SEVEN YEARS SINCE THE TALENTED PAMELA NOMVETE LEFT SOUTH AFRICA WITH HER LIFE IN SHAMBLES, BUT NOW SHE’S BACK AND THE SPOTLIGHT IS ON HER IN A WAY IT NEVER WAS BEFORE. ZAMA NKOSI MEETS THIS DYNAMIC ARTIST TO FIND OUT MORE ABOUT HER JOURNEY OF SELF-DISCOVERY.

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ame, success and a regular paying gig are probably the top three things many aspiring artists place on their dream list and for some time, actress Pamela Nomvete had all three. Hers was a name and face that South Africa knew and fell into a love-hate relationship with quickly and passionately. But true to celebrity culture, especially for some actors, her then character Ntsiki Lukhele became bigger than Pamela in the eyes of Generations fans; almost totally eclipsing everything else that Pamela had to offer.

Over the years an intoxicating mixture of fame, powerlessness, loss of control and the ever-looming presence of her character, Ntsiki, led Pamela down a dark path and a breakdown of sorts. Then she disappeared from the South African entertainment landscape and we didn’t know what she was up to. She’s back now with a revealing book in tow and a big dream to affect the local arts space again – this time in a manner that will help mould the country’s talent and artistic landscape.

“To be honest, I still wonder at what point I lost myself, at what point did I lose respect for my life…”

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LESSONS IN THE DARK Pamela is very candid in her book, Dancing To The Beat Of The Drum, about the various ways her life was falling apart.

From her unhealthy marriage, which included many of her in-laws leeching off her, to the shady characters she found peppered across her life. I ask Pamela, what was happening with her that she could allow so many unsavoury characters and such behaviour in her space without stopping it.

“I wasn’t even at the point of examining things, because if I had stopped even for a moment I would have seen it.

Not realising that I personally – who I was and what I knew – was completely shutting down. To be honest, I still wonder at what point I lost myself, at what point did I lose respect for my life and for who I was, because that’s what had happened. And, of course, my environment reflected that. And instead of pausing and looking at what energies I was inviting into my life, I went on. I had lost my reason,” she explains.

ESSAYS OF AFRICA

COVER STORY EOA Pamela says she believes that a lack of self-esteem is what led to her life falling apart. She had gone her whole life with a great support system that had guided her, but even then she believes her self-esteem wasn’t where it was supposed to be and it didn’t have a chance to manifest itself. So without that support structure, her low opinion of herself surfaced.

“That’s how powerful and insidious a loss of your self-esteem can be because it seeps into your very soul, so you are unable to see when you are disrespecting your life. And I was drinking copiously; we were all doing it and that’s what the norm was. I was telling someone the other day that when you look around your life and you see that everyone is self-medicating, you need to ask yourself why. We didn’t stop to ask, we all just lived through our nightmares and wore a mask, pretending things were okay when they clearly weren’t.”

ed it." It was more than being on television; more than about her being a good actress, and that is where my pain came from. I felt this had nothing to do with my craft. There was a lot of confusion.”

THE DESIRE TO GIVE BACK From the ashes of the confusion and chaos of a collapsed life in South Africa, Pamela started getting back into her craft in the UK. She found a good agent, started working again and getting back to who she was before she had lost herself. She was performing with the Royal Shakespeare Company, the Royal National Theatre and the Royal Court and had a role in the very famous Coronation Street on UK television.

RECOVERING FROM THE FALL By the time Pamela left South Africa in 2007, she’d lost everything and even had a stint living in her car at a petrol station in Randburg.

That was just the physical side of her life, though. She had also been through so much emotionally and mentally, and needed the time out. So she headed back to the United Kingdom (UK), a place she knew well and one that allowed her to recuperate.

“There’s an energy about the UK that helped me get better. It’s an established society, I knew what to expect and it works. The basic needs for survival are taken care of so I didn’t have to expend much energy thinking about that. Being there also gave me anonymity – I could look how I want without anyone caring.

I needed a break from the life I’d had in South Africa and it afforded me that,” she says.

The anonymity that Pamela craved so much is something that had ceased to be an option for her in South Africa because no matter where she went, Ntsiki followed her around in the form of recognition in the eyes of complete strangers.

But surely this was supposed to be the success that everyone aims for? Reaching the very top of your field of expertise? “At the very beginning of all that madness, it was intoxicating. I would think that I must have wished for this because I’m right here doing it. So on one level that’s where there was confusion because I was like: 'Okay, this is what success looks like, but why doesn’t it feel like success?' That then breeds guilt because you know that everyone wants this. I don’t think I was emotionally and spiritually prepared for it so I didn’t know what to do with it. And it wasn’t exactly how I want-

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COVER STORY EOA

Her relationship with her family was mended and life was good. It was also during this time that she was introduced to Buddhism and especially the teachings of Daisaku Ikeda, her mentor, which resonated with her in a way that other spiritual paths hadn’t before.

“In Buddhism, there is a teaching that we all have certain negative tendencies and the aim is not to try and get rid of them, because they’re part of what makes you human, but rather knowing what those tendencies are and then making sure that they don’t overwhelm you. You use them rather to serve you to create value but that can only be done if you acknowledge the negative within yourself.

“What I loved about Buddhism is that I realised that I was responsible for my life. I became more empowered and could then take positive action. I learnt that I own my life, and no one can manipulate me on that level.”

With her life and her sense of self back intact, why did Pamela decide to leave all of that behind and come back to the place that hurt her so badly?

“I think when I recognised that I have a relationship with South Africa and that’s kind of forever. If I had to have a mission anywhere in the world it would be here and now that I’m not distracted, I wanted to see how I could give back. With all the training and experience I have I can create some value with it and contribute to the country’s future,” she says.

Pamela’s Buddhist mentor says that everyone has to go through their own personal human revolution and that you do your greatest human revolution in the place you suffered the most and for her that was Johannesburg. Now, back in the city, Pamela says it doesn’t haunt her. “Some of the memories and experiences here were good and even the bad ones led to a major turning point in my life, and that’s a good thing!”

Pamela is using art to give back to her community. The Sibongile Bax Dale Incubation Centre, which is named after her parents, is the reason she is back in Mzansi and planning on being here for a while. “We will be using the arts as a way of encouraging young people and promoting self-reliance so we can build a strong creative community. Instead of moaning about the lack of spaces that nurture creativity, I want to be part of the solution.”

This is a big project for Pamela and she says her journey has led her to this mission. “It’s because I hit rock-bottom that I have the courage to take this mission on. I’m not afraid of anything. We are in the development research stage and testing programmes to see what works best. We are looking for partners and investors. I’m hoping to launch it properly in three years’ time.

While Pamela’s life has changed in many ways, her Generations character still follows her around today, many years and many productions after she tried to rid herself of it. “There is something about fame that I still can’t receive very well. I feel like I was on telly just last night. What’s irritating is that I didn’t leave the country because I left Generations. I left that show in 2000 and had a whole other career in this country before I left. It’s an aspect I’m still going to have to work on and work out. I’m not in the spotlight in the way I was all those years ago. I am here as an artist, not a celebrity. This is about my artistry and not my persona and that is always what I was after.” E

PICTURES: BY GARETH JACOBS; SHOOT LOCATION: LOVE BOOKS, MELVILLE

“If I had to have a mission anywhere in the world, it would be here…”

If you are interested in finding out more about Pamela’s new project based in Braamfontein, Joburg, please email her on pamelanomvete@yahoo.com.

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MY OWN, YOUR OWN‌ OURS!

Launched just over four years ago, Owami Women has grown to become a powerful communications platform.

CARYN THANDI PETERSEN speaks to founder, BRIDGET NKUNA.

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WOMEN’S NETWORK EOA

T PICTURES: ©iSTOCK.COM; BRIDGET NKUNA.

he name Owami came to Bridget Nkuna as a revelation soon after her mother passed away. Heavily pregnant with her first child and feeling adrift without the anchoring support of her mother to guide her through the journey into motherhood, Bridget felt an overwhelming need for connection and guidance in a space she could call her own. It dawned on her then that other women were likely looking for something similar – and the seeds of Owami, meaning “my own”, were planted.

“Women need a platform to share stories, wisdom and advice in order to support each other,” explains Bridget.

“We are thirsty for connection. Yet we often remain isolated, waiting on the rare opportunities to meet for coffee.” It was this realisation that led her to look for other means of support amongst women. Although initially distrustful of social media for authentic communication, Bridget realised this was the best mechanism to start a

conversation amongst women despite their busy lives.

As a result, Owami Women’s Deep and Meaningful Conversations was born.

The organisation encompasses a number of platforms for women to find inspiration, encouragement and support – be it from the comfort of their phone or laptops, or at a special event organised by Bridget. The first series of conversations took shape in the form of Owami Breakfasts For Women.

The bi-monthly breakfasts are open to those looking for an authentic space to connect and share, featuring a variety of speakers who offer their wisdom and stories.

A monthly newsletter was created to capture highlights of the conversations held at these events, and in order to continue the conversation, a Facebook page was launched. Bridget was overwhelmed by the response she received and soon expanded the platform to include a website. Clearly this was something that women across South Africa – and even further afield – were desperately in need of. “It allowed for friendships to be born and sisterhood to be created amongst women, both near and far,” she explains.

GET INVOLVED NOW Join Owami Women’s network by visiting the website, Owamiwomen.co.za, and check out the Facebook page, Owami Women. The first event for 2015 is being held in January and will focus on setting goals to live your best life. Check the website and Facebook page for success. Bridget’s words on the Owami Women website sums up the organisation’s purpose clearly:

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“Women sharing their stories and supporting one another on a public platform will do more than inspire viewership; it will encourage more women to speak up and share their voice. Inspiring the women of South Africa empowers our mothers, our sisters, our friends and ourselves, and as a result, empowers a whole society.”

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Owami Women also holds special events on days such as Women’s Day and Mother’s Day. These are poignant gatherings that feature speakers and performers who share their journeys in the hope of inspiring others and providing comfort to those facing similar challenges. At last year’s Women’s Day event, Bridget invited girls from local schools so they too could join the network and find role models to emulate. “We need to pass on the baton,” she says. “Young girls can glimpse their tomorrow through us.“ When speaking to Bridget, her passion for empowering women is electrifying. It drives her in every facet of her life and has culminated in Owami, a self-proclaimed “ministry of women”. She describes how a young lady, Refilwe Sedumedi, recently reached out to the network about her struggles with breast cancer. So moved by her story, a number of women in the network decided to join together and organise a tea party for her.

They all chipped in and took her for a decadent day at The Palazzo Montecasino hotel, despite never having met her before. Bridget describes what a moving day it was, filled with pampering and unconditional love, where Refilwe could feel less alone in her struggles. “Owami Women has created a sacred space for women, fostering compassion and connectivity across time, race and continents,” she says proudly.

Yet the journey to success has not always been easy for Bridget. Despite receiving heartfelt support from many women, it was difficult to bring corporate partners on board, as they were somewhat skeptical of her vision. Yet she persevered and her efforts have certainly paid off, with the network continuing to grow around the world.

People contribute recipes, health and beauty tips, poetry and many other life-affirming skills to the network. According to Bridget, the social media platforms have proven to be an overwhelming success: “ Women utilise the pages daily to share their joys and challenges, seek information and support each other in the process.”

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One of the components of Owami Women of which Bridget is most proud is Adopt A Sister, a programme that mentors women seeking guidance and support. Women can volunteer to make a difference in someone’s life by being a compassionate friend and ally, or if they are in need, can write in to gain a “sister” from the network. It provides help for women in any stage of their life, whether struggling with professional or personal challenges.

Bridget herself has mentored quite a few women in this regard, recalling a young woman who couldn’t contain her emotions when Bridget agreed to meet her for coffee and bring her into the network. She expressed such surprise and joy at finally finding someone who was willing to help her, as she had reached out to numerous people previously but with no success.

Bridget’s words on the Owami Women website sums up the organisation’s purpose clearly: “Women sharing their stories and supporting one another on a public platform will do more than inspire viewership; it will encourage more women to speak up and share their voice. Inspiring the women of South Africa empowers our mothers, our sisters, our friends and ourselves, and as a result, empowers a whole society.” E

2015: WATCH OUT FOR OWAMI!

Bridget is re-launching a re-branded newsletter this year, with much of the content provided by women in the network. She is also planning on taking her YouTube channel to new heights by launching a digital TV network, with the content a continuation of the conversations started on other Owami Women platforms.

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FASHION EOA

stylish and oh-so chic designer bag, R5 000, TOMMY HILFIGER.

Choice, choices choices

A designer handbag is a staple for any woman who takes her fashion seriously. But will you choose the bag or this fab outfit below?

ROCKING A FULL OUTFIT WITH GREAT ACCESSORIES FOR ONLY R5 000!

Black shirt, R459, Zara.

White handbag, R1 300, Mango.

WORDS: TUMI MDLULI. PICTURES: SUPPLIED BY STOCKISTS.

Colourful neckpiece, R559, Zara.

Black heel, R899, Woolworths.

Red pencil skirt, R1 199, Polo.

Sleek hoop gold earrings, R129, Forever New.

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BREAK THE MOULD

Traditional perceptions of the roles of women continue to hold aspiring entrepreneurs back. In her first article of a three-part series, MORONGWA MAKAKANE urges you to break the shackles that are holding you back from being your own boss.

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SELF-EMPOWERMENT EOA

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or centuries women have been denied access to education while being expected to fulfil the roles of nurturers and caregivers. However, with the economic landscape rapidly changing in the 21st century, and the cost of living requiring double household incomes, women also have to bring home the bacon. As a result, there has been an upsurge of female white collar workers. Using the lessons they’ve learnt in their homes and life in general, women are now stepping into boardrooms and showing that their intuition is also an important aspect of making big business decisions. It is this determination and raw talent that often leaves their male counterparts feeling threatened and then blocking women’s progress in business.

With their slow advancement, or recognition in the workplace, women are increasingly venturing out of traditional employment and exploring the option of becoming entrepreneurs. As they try to change the business-owner playing field, women are running into brick walls in what is still a male-dominated game. This being the case, there is a need for greater focus on the empowerment the aspiring females entrepreneur and ensuring their success.

PICTURES: ©ISTOCK.COM

WHY FOCUS ON WOMEN?

The majority of businesses are still owned by men. However, in reality, women have helped these men operate their businesses but, because they were always working alongside their husbands and male business partners, they weren’t always given credit for their efforts and were only able to take up the leadership position when the man passed away. Moreover, the majority of female-owned small businesses were and continue to be in the service industry. In recent years, though, there’s been a spike in the number of women who are moving into traditionally male-dominated sectors such as manufacturing, construction and finance.

Often women have to work twice as hard as men to prove themselves in business, and opportunities for further education or on-the-job training are limited too. For these reasons, women entrepreneurs need a special focus in order for them to be successful.

But times are changing with the younger generation of women who have better access to education that is needed to lay the foundation for successful entrepreneurship. However, despite some strides being made, upcoming and established businesswomen continue to face challenges. Not only do they encounter hurdles at financial institutions, but gender discrimination is still rife.

As a woman in business you need to realise that the business world is a cut-throat environment, and for you to be as successful as your toughest competitor there are certain attributes you need to understand and learn.

Let’s look at the five key attributes you need to be a successful female entrepreneur.

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FIVE MUST-HAVE ATTRIBUTES Courage and Resilience Having courage and conviction to make your dream a reality can be valuable whenever challenges arise. Possessing inner strength to work through difficult situations, and having the ability to bounce back will ensure your success in the end.

Assertiveness and Confidence Being strong-minded, prepared to voice your opinions and able to stand up for what you believe in, means that you will be taken seriously. But don’t confuse these attributes with aggression, rudeness or arrogance.

Challenge the stereotypes, speak your mind and, when you’re being overlooked or being looked down upon, use these attributes to address the issue.

Compassion and Caring Having these two attributes means having the ability to make a difference, giving unconditionally and effecting social change.

But don’t allow people to walk all over you and make decisions for you. Remember, a woman with compassion has the ability to influence others and situations.

Integrity and Trustworthiness Having integrity means that you’ll always be fair, honest, respectful and trustworthy in your business dealings. This means you will put honour before profits and always live by your convictions and values.

Vision and Balance A visionary woman understands her goals and how she’s going to achieve them. She maintains balance in her work and home life, which allows her to live authentically.

Maintaining a balanced lifestyle will ensure success, both in business and at home.

The next article in this series will focus on what you need to consider before you quit your job to start your OWN business. E

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Has festive season shopping depleted your bank balance, or have you managed to keep your spending in check? Here are some smart money choices for those who are broke and others who have been good this Christmas. By ZAMA NKOSI.

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PICTURE: ŠiSTOCK.COM.

8 WAYS TO BEAT JANUARY

MONEY EOA

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he holiday season is something we all look forward to. It means some down time to spend with family and friends without the stresses of work. The upside is that you get to reset the clock and enjoy the people and things that really matter in life.

The downside is that you have more time to spend your well-earned money, and with gifts, countless brunches, travelling and a host of other miscellaneous bills, it’s no wonder that most people find themselves in a financially tricky place once the Christmas lights and braais have left a dent on your waistline and wallets.

We have a few ideas to help you navigate January, whether you’re in the financial doldrums or managed to save despite the festivities.

CASHLESS SOCIETY

If you’re finding yourself in the team that is broke in January, saving and budgeting had better be on your resolutions list. There is no reason to be strapped for cash if you plan adequately and spend responsibly. But now that you are here, here’s how to survive the month until payday.

1. MAKE A PLAN: It might seem like it’s too late to be making any kind of plan but it isn’t. You need to find a way to work around your limited funds, so start by deciding what you’ll be cutting down on and start immediately.

This might mean missing your manicure appointment or carpooling with a colleague to work. At this point, cutting back means that you limit being broke to only January.

2. DON’T SKIP BILLS: You might be tempted to skip a few bills just to get through what seems like a really long month but, whatever you do, don’t go there. The interest you will pay means you lose more money in the long run.

Pay your bills, rather skimp on things that aren’t essential, such as those trips to Woolies for creamy desserts and convenience foods.

3. CREDIT NO-NO: Those ads for short-term loans can start looking tempting but please don’t give in to temptation. Borrowing money when you’re already in a bind often means that next month will be just as tough, because you’ll have your regular expenses plus the money you’ve borrowed to pay for. Don’t do it! This is a good time

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to use loyalty points like eBucks to spend on small expenses without having to use any of your own actual money.

4. HOME SWEET HOME: You’ve done as many lunches and braais as you need, so staying home is a great way to ensure you don’t spend any more money. Movies can be as good on your TV as they are in the movie theatre, so make fun times for you and your family a cheap affair. By the way, this is worth keeping up throughout the year. It’ll enhance family time and save you a stack.

BLING, BLING, MONEY AIN'T A THING

So you’ve survived December, bought new school uniforms and a snazzy new office outfit, leaving you with a few rands to rub together. Well done! This means that you’re probably money smart and know how to not blow your cash at once.

Here are a few ideas on how to handle your January savings.

1. MORE FOR LESS: The December/January sales are a good way of getting certain items for half the price. Only buy what you can afford though; they idea isn’t to blow it all, it’s to get more stuff for far less. Look out for great sidewalk sales at the major malls because you can often save up to 75 percenr.

2. NO LATE SANTA: Don’t be the guy who offers to pay the bill just because everyone else says they cannot afford to go out. Taking on entertainment bills for others just takes away from your piggy bank. Rather hang out with your broke friends at home than foot the bills for group outings.

3. PAY MORE BILLS: You may think this doesn’t make sense but if you’ve been swiping your credit card over the festive season, try to pay off as much as possible, especially if you have a card that has a few interest-free days.

4. MEET YOUR FINANCIAL ADVISOR: You want to stay in the business of having more money than you need, so scheduling a meeting with your advisor is a good idea. If you have a decent amount of money that you don’t know what to do with, find a good way to invest it so that you don’t spend it without a second thought. Your financial advisor should be able to point you in the right direction, which hopefully means that your pockets won’t be empty any time soon. E

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I do, I do, I do...

Gone are the days of needing someone to pay the bills and make ‘an honest woman out of you’. If the booming wedding industry is anything to go by, women still want to be a Mrs, writes ZAMA NKOSI.

THINK THROUGH THE “I DO”

For 26-year-old Nonkuthalo Xapile, a junior fashion editor from Johannesburg, the decision to get married wasn’t one that was taken lightly. She’s been in a relationship with her fiancé, Rearabetswe Thithi, for five years and although they are getting married sooner than she had anticipated, she always knew that this is the direction their relationship would take one day.

“The decision to marry is mostly faith-based. I’m a Christian and so is my fiancé; we understand marriage to be a gift from God. It was never an option to just be together without marriage and we are now at a point where there is no reason to wait. We are already building towards a future together anyway, so there is no reason to not do it under the covenant of marriage,” she says.

Dlamini says for younger couples, the desire to be together and legitimise the relationship in the eyes of elders is important. “Most young people do marry for love and in a lot of cases, it is very romanticised. That’s not a bad thing but it’s important to remember that it takes more than just love to make a marriage work,” she explains.

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Having great role models for marriage is another reason, Dlamini says, why some women are eager to get married, and in Nonkuthalo’s case, both her and Rearabetswe’s parents are still in committed marriages. Even though they are both in their mid-twenties, this couple did all their homework when it came to the not-so-romantic parts of marriage, like prenuptial agreements. “We do have a prenuptial contract. Even though divorce is not an option for us, there are business ventures that we would like to try in the future and we don’t want those decisions to hurt us as a unit. It’s a way of protecting the future of our family.”

I DO … THE SECOND TIME AROUND

For 37-year old Nkuli*, even though marriage wasn’t exactly a fairytale the first time around, she chose to do it again. “My friends thought I was crazy for getting married again, but it feels different this time. My first marriage was in my early twenties and my expectations of marriage and life today are very different to what they were back then,” explains Nkuli.

Nkuli’s husband is also a divorce, who is in his forties and she says that their expectations of marriage are very different to most people who have very romanticised ideals about the institution. “We love each other madly and that is still the primary reason we are getting married, but it is not the only reason. We lived together for two years to see if we were compatible, and we are best friends – in my opinion that counts a lot more than being passionate lovers. These days I find a cuddle and a chat after a long day far more romantic than champagne and roses,” she says.

Having been on the other side of marriage, what makes Nkuli think things will work out this time? “I have no guarantee that they will,” she states. “And I don’t have the need for that guarantee anymore. I used to believe that I would never get divorced and life proved me wrong – that divorce saved my life and is still the best decision I made for myself. With my second marriage, I’m doing my best with my best friend and hoping for the best.”

Dlamini says Nkuli’s view of marriage is a more realistic one. “Wanting to get married for a solid support structure and friendship without overly romanticised expectations means that your marriage stands more of a chance of survival. People who expect honeymoon sex and round-the-clock happiness inevitably get disappointed and disillusioned in their marriages.Those who know that it’s a partnership that requires more than romance to keep it going are less disappointed.” E *If you’re married or in the process of getting married, tell us why on our website Essaysofafrica.com. E

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PICTURE: SUPPLIED BY NONKUTHALO XAPILE.

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ime changes most things. Just 100 years ago, women weren’t in corporate spaces or leading major organisations. Instead they were likely to be at home, taking care of children and making sure dinner is ready and waiting for their husbands. These days, women have the choice of either doing one or, as in most cases, both career and family as this has become the norm.

Even though many trends have come and gone, the one that remains constant in many women’s lives is marriage.

A century ago marriage was an integral part of survival; you needed that union for security and protection. These days, women mainly rely on themselves for financial security, so why are so many still taking the plunge and saying “I do?”

Marriage is one of those things that remains so socially ingrained in many women’s psyche as an ideal, something to aim for and delight in, explains Thokozile Dlamini, a relationship and marriage counsellor from Durban. “We can’t pretend that we aren’t shaped by the importance society places on marriage and the pressure that goes with it on women to tick it off life’s to-do list. One of the main reasons women still get married is societal pressure, followed closely by financial support and the idea of believing in family within the bounds of marriage,” she says.

RELATIONSHIPS EOA

Rearabetswe Thithi and Nonkhutalo Xapile on their engagement in Cape Town.

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PUT YOUR TRUST IN CONDOMS

He cheated. You forgave him. Now protect yourself and condomise, advises these experts. ZAMA NKOSI reports.

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n an ideal world, marriage means fidelity, honesty and a sexual relationship where you know that your health will not be compromised.

But many people don’t have the security of knowing that their partners are being faithful.

You may be married, have found out that your partner has cheated and then decided to stay and work things out. The reasons for remaining in the relationship can vary, from not believing in divorce, to still caring or being in love with your partner. No matter what the reason, being in the relationship means that there is still a chance of a sexual relationship.

“In this case, why people stay with cheating partners isn’t the focus but the issue is how to navigate your sex life after something so monumental has happened in your marriage,” says Sindi Nhlapho, a relationship counsellor in Johannesburg.

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SEX & INTAMACY EOA “Some people react by withdrawing sexually from their partners, but the reality is if you’re still sharing a bed, there is a chance that there will be some sexual interaction. Most wives don’t want to think about the fact that they are most at risk for sexual infections because condoms have long been discarded in their relationships. The truth is if your husband is a cheater or has cheated, chances are that having unprotected sex with him will not end well for you,” she warns.

BE WISE AND CONDOMISE

emotional and sexual level, and where trust is slowly regained.

Getting back to being intimate can be difficult. “It’s not unusual for some people to not want to have sex with a cheating partner; there are so many emotions at play that sex might be the last thing on their minds. I firmly believe that if you don’t feel ready to have sex, then don’t. And your partner should fully understand and support your decision,” explains Nhlapho.

Most individuals usually have the tendency to want to make some major changes or take action after finding out about the infidelity. Says Revell: “Remember that you’re in a crisis, so you might not be thinking straight. Although hurt and angry emotions are fully understandable, remember that your judgement can be impaired, so it’s wise not to make any big decisions at this point in time. Rather focus on smaller decisions like finding a therapist, reaching out to your support system, and talking to your partner, albeit difficult, to help figure out the next step for the both of you. Remember that you will have to make some decisions regarding the direction your relationship will take, but this will need time and clarity,” she says.

Your sexual relationship cannot be repaired separately to the rest of your relationship. As the other aspects of your relationship get better or worse, so will your sex life if it was affected by infidelity. “If your partner wants you back on all levels, he will have to earn that right. Renegotiate the relationship in a way that works for both of you and keeping yourself healthy is a high priority,” adds Revell. E

Sexologist Arlynn Revell says that as soon as you find out that your partner has cheated and you’ve decided to forgive him, having a sexual transmitted illnesses (STI) screening is paramount. “The best is to go for STI tests to make sure that you are in the clear. It’s best that both you and your partner go together. It’s not always easy in a marriage, but insist on using condoms; through communication, encourage the condom use because it is best to protect yourself for the foreseeable future.”

Elna McIntosh, also a sexologist, says that bringing up the use of condoms can be difficult for some people, but it isn’t an optional conversation. “There is no best way to bring up the topic, but it’s possibly better addressed in a counselling session with a marriage counsellor or a therapist. He needs to go for all the STI tests and I would suggest condom use till he’s out of the three-month window period for HIV. The condom use needs to be 100% of the time,” she warns.

Nhlapho says that some women, even though they are the ones that have been cheated on, will be too shy to bring up reintroducing condoms. “Not all relationship dynamics are the same It’s hard to know how you will react to finding out about your and some women, because of a knock to partner’s infidelity, but there are things you can do to keep their self-esteem caused by the partner’s yourself safe and sane while dealing with the fallout. infidelity, want to try even harder to please their partners sexually. So bringing up condoms isn’t something they want to TAKE TIME OUT think about, even though it should be the The shock and hurt of an affair can leave you reeling. Take time first thing that they insist upon. If you don’t out to be alone with your thoughts and emotions. Having friends feel that you can enforce the condom rule around can be good, but also serves as a crutch instead of you after infidelity, chances are that there are dealing with your issues on your own. If you can, get away bigger problems in your marriage,” she says. from your home and give yourself a chance to process what has And what happens if your partner happened. Focus on you and not your cheating spouse, and try refuses to use condoms? “Ridiculous as it to remember that you’re not responsible for his actions. sounds, I have come across these cases. I suggest the woman leaves the relationship DOCTOR’S VISIT or, at the very least, stops all sexual contact.

If you and your partner don’t use protection, get tested and Someone who will cheat on you and then screened for HIV and STIs immediately after finding out about not care about you wanting to protect your his infidelity. The sooner this is done, the better. health is abusive,” states Nhlapho.

McIntosh agrees. “Stop having sex with him. Leave him. Your health is more GET HELP FROM THE EXPERTS important than saving a relationship that Whether you are staying or leaving, you need someone with has no chance of succeeding anyway,” she the expertise to help you unpack the feelings that you are says firmly. experiencing. Most people claim to “just get on with it”, but

PICTURES: ©iSTOCK.COM.

HE’S CHEATED, NOW WHAT?

BUILDING BLOCKS

Using condoms will just be one dimension of trying to rebuild a relationship on an

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that often means that there will be lingering issues that will affect you in the future.

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CULTURES As we try to create a balance between our rich African heritage and rapid westernisation, reader KHOLIWE NKAMBULE asks if we are losing our sense of self and our traditional teachings in these modern times.

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PICTURES: ŠiSTOCK.COM

Clash of

Clash of

CULTURES

As we try to create a balance between our rich African heritage and rapid westernisation, reader KHOLIWE NKAMBULE asks if we are losing our sense of self and our traditional teachings in these modern times.

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I

t’s my culture!” These words are often used in defence of ’questionable’ actions, according to some, such as when a man doesn’t hold open a door for a woman. Sometimes these words are uttered when an employee wants to take family responsibility leave for the burial of a cousin, thrice removed from their maternal grandmother’s side, and so many other instances that you can’t help but wonder in the end, what is culture?

It’s just assumed that when these words are spoken by a black African, he or she is referring to a collective black culture, and yet there are so many ethnic groups with different customs in South Africa, let alone the rest of the continent. Are we as

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READERS CORNER EOA

JPG; WWW.DENISHLASH.COM

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Kholiwe Nkambule

black Africans using this statement when it suits us? Are we using this statement to justify irrational wants and needs?

Be honest, “it’s my culture” has worked for you in the past, especially when mentioned in a conversation with a person from another ethnic group such as whites, coloureds and Indians. However, more and more I’m seeing us use this statement to justify our actions to other black Africans, and in the process we are actually changing and becoming more like the very people we are trying to justify our actions to.

In a democratic South Africa we have the opportunity to all attend the same schools, play the same sports and buy houses in any neighbourhood, and with these new opportunities I think we have lost the true meaning of our own culture. For example, we now take exception to a man who doesn’t allow a woman to leave an elevator first, whereas in many cultures it is considered brave and a man’s duty to enter a room first so he can protect the women who follow him against any dangers that may lie ahead. Another example is where an employee is considered dishonest for not looking his employer in the eye when addressed, but in fact he is being respectful because the person who is addressing him is an authority figure. Have we turned into hypocrites and only use the culture card to get what we want when we want it?

Let’s talk about so-called white weddings for a bit. It must always be perfectly intimate with only immediate family and VIP guests, and absolutely no children. We so easily trade in the big traditional wedding where the whole community is invited and rather go all out for the western version that says less is more. Then two months later we want leave because our cousin, three times removed from our maternal grandmother’s

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in-laws' side, has passed away. And mind you, because “it’s my culture” I have to not only attend the funeral, but go and assist three days before the event. How confusing, right?

Should it then surprise us when we get baffled stares from our employers when they are sceptical about granting that family responsibility leave?

I believe we have taken modernity too far. Should we establish a middle ground? Should there be a balance between the two worlds? Truth is, we are too far gone to go back and yet the direction we are heading in only calls for more confusion and our children will become the victims of our actions, too.

Do we teach our boys to let their sisters enter or exit a room first, as this is the correct and polite thing to do, or do we teach them to protect their sisters from whatever danger may be lurking on the other side of a door? Do we teach our girls to despise the practice of lobola as it degrades them and is regarded as a trading mechanism, or do we make them understand the significance of such a tradition and how it’s meant to bring two families together? Do we tell them that their husbands will be their equals and instil the 50-50 principle, or do we teach them how they should respect and bow to their husband, no matter what?

The truth is, we have evolved and, whether we think it’s for better or worse, is up for debate. However, we can’t continue to skate between cultures and hope to raise authentic black women and men. At some point we will have to face reality and make that decision. After all, it’s our culture. E Kholiwe Nkambule, co-owner of Posh SA Accessories and Clothing, expresses her womanhood through writing.

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As a successful communications manager for TSB Sugar and single mom of four, CHRISTABEL HLATSHWAYO is a shining light for upcoming professional black women. She chats to PHINDIWE NKOSI about her journey thus far.

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PICTURES: SUPPLIED BY CHRISTABEL HLATSHWAYO.

OUR SWEET INSPIRATION

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MY JOURNEY EOA

leasant. That’s the word Christabel Hlatshwayo, 45, uses to describe her life journey thus far. Had she not picked that word, I would most likely have used it to describe her. Even when things go wrong, she manages to adapt and adjust things with a plan and her good sense of humour intact. She’s a problem-solver who makes challenges disappear. Christabel, a corporate communications manager at TSB Sugar, represents what we as young black professionals aspire to be.

As we chat, I realise she’s always known that she is somebody significant, but her journey hasn’t always been that clear. “I always dreamt of being a powerful and influential woman,” she agrees, “but I never thought I would end up where I am now.” Tongue in cheek, she quotes the fictional character Peter Pan: “Dreams do come true, if we only wish hard enough. You can have anything in life if you will sacrifice everything else for it.”

REVISITING FAILURE

While no one aspires to fail, Christabel doesn’t denounce it when it happens but goes all out to learn from it and turn it around. One of her first lessons was at high school, when she took to the stage for the debating team. “I got stage fright. I stormed out of the hall because my opponents were laughing at me,” she remembers. Once outside, she managed to calm herself down.

“I then requested that I be given a chance to continue with the debate. Luckily, the adjudicators gave me that opportunity. When the debate came to an end, I was the best speaker of the day,” she says.

She’s since often looked back on this day – not without pain – and on the lessons she learnt. “While it hurts to revisit failure, it can open your eyes, encourage you to make better decisions and set you on a path to be more successful.

I have also learnt that no matter what I’m doing, I should strive to do it to the best of my ability. Otherwise it’s not worth doing at all.”

THE LIFE-CHANGING MOMENT Christabel Hlatshwayo is passionate about working with students and giving back to her community.

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Christabel says her first step on her journey to success was taken on the day in 2012 when she decided to leave her hometown of Nelspruit to move to Malelane, in Mpumalanga, to take up a communication management post in a private sector company. Although it was by no means an easy decision, she’s glad that she took that step.

“I took the decision in order to do better in life and become a success,” she says. “And it’s been a decision that changed my life forever. The move from public sector to private sector enabled me to rise above the odds and pursue the career of my dreams.”

Christabel has been working in government ever since she completed her Bachelor’s degree in languages from University of Durban Westville, postgrad diploma in project management through Wits and a public relations certificate with PRISA. “I have been working with powerful men and women in a political environment and have become a hard worker.

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EOA MY JOURNEY

Also, I don’t settle for less than the very best,” she explains. Her mottos all have the same kind of ring to them – dictate to your environment, and don’t be afraid to model and remodel yourself constantly in order to grow.

“My career has kept me on my toes and taught me to be a reader, a great thinker and a toughie. It’s also inspired me to strive for excellence in whatever I put my head and heart to. This helped me to develop my character,” she says. “I have learnt to discipline my mind and focus on the good and the beneficial. I’ve taught myself to think positively.”

With the right attitude and hard work, success is attainable, she says.

Christabel is her own biggest competitor, so she sets really high standards for herself. And she also makes a point of turning to some of the best for advice. “I’ve always consulted with those who were there before me and who have reached major milestones in their careers,” she says.

CELEBRATING SUCCESS

When I ask her about her biggest career success she thinks a bit before suggesting her appointment at the Mpumalanga provincial government as a project manager to drive the communications strategy for the Maputo Development Corridor, a trade route that connects the South African provinces of Gauteng, Limpopo and Mpumalanga with the port city of Maputo, which is the capital of Mozambique.

The corridor comprises roads (including the N4) and railways, ports and border facilities (Komatipoort) connecting the industrial areas around Gauteng, and mines and agricultural districts to the east, with ports on the Mozambican coast.

“This was an opportunity to prove my worth and also to market and bring international awareness to the

Christabel attending a women's event to celebrate their achievements (left); Christabel's four children (right).

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investment opportunities of the corridor,” she says.

One of the largest and most successful corridor initiatives in the Southern African Development Community, the Maputo Development Corridor has made a significant contribution towards regional economic integration and development.

Christabel has found much fulfilment in the knowledge that her contribution has been a positive one. “I’m satisfied that I’ve contributed positively to bring awareness to South African citizens and people in other parts of the world. I am so proud that I was part of the team that made this project a success.”

INSPIRING OTHERS

Christabel has some good advice for other women.

“You need to stop thinking and stressing about your circumstances,” she says. “Nothing is going to change until you do something. Stop waiting for things to happen, and start making them happen.”

She’s adamant that as a woman you need to become a priority in your own life. You need to take care of yourself before you can take care of anyone else. Make you a priority, she insists.

In order to do so, you might need to let go of people who no longer make a positive contribution to your life. “There are people whom you need to let go of,” she explains. “It doesn’t mean that you hate them. You can still relate to them, but their chapter in your life has ended.” Sometimes these might even be lovers, she explains. “If we can fall in love,” she says, “it’s possible to fall out of love.”

Women are true community builders, she believes.

They hold the fort. But many of them remain unsung and the issues they grapple with on a daily basis are obscured. Moreover, there is a long road ahead before women and men will be true equals, she says. “We’re still on the road to economic emancipation. Emancipation has brought women economic equality with men; a woman can now choose her own profession and trade, but she is not yet sufficiently equipped to compete with men,” she explains.

The contribution of women to the informal sector is undeniable, she says, yet it has not been acknowledged enough by government. She feels government needs to get to grips with the important part women play in the informal sector and how it represents a significant part of women’s contribution to the economy. “Governments need to harness the potential of African women and girls, and include them in decision-making in politics, in the public and private sector, in parastatals and on corporate boards,” she says.

KEEPING THE FAMILY TOGETHER

Not only is Christabel a successful career woman, she’s also a single mom of four; her youngest is six, and her oldest is 19. “I have to make sure I manage my job and also nurture my family,” she says. “If I have to take time out from the office to read my child a bedtime story,

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I’m not apologetic about it,” she explains. “I have learnt to balance my career and family life.”

Single parenthood hasn’t been easy, and Christabel says she’s lucky to have a solid network – she calls it her “support team” – that includes her mom, her helper who manages the house, her sister and brother, her prayer group and other parents in the community. “I realised that no matter how strong I felt, I could not do this alone,” she says. “There are days when I don’t really feel that I’m the best mother, but my support team will always remind me to hang in there. That morale boost keeps me going.”

She describes her core essence as courage and strength – the courage to face life as a mother and a career woman, and the strength to nurture other human beings to survive in this world. ”Being a caring mother, a responsible parent and the real you is the essence of being a woman,” she says.

“I believe all of the above can only be achieved if God is the centre of all things in your life. God has been my source of strength and provider in my journey to reveal who I am in my career and in my life.” E

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SNORE AND YOU SLEEP ALONE

Is your partner's excessive snoring keeping you awake at night? CARYN THANDI PETERSEN heads to The Snore Clinic to find out more about this common condition that could break up a happy home.

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HEALTH EOA

U

to the condition, some extreme cases of sleep apnoea have pon entering Dr Dave Koton’s Snore also apparently resulted in divorce. Is there any light at the Clinic, the first thing I see is a sign end of the tunnel? According to Dr Koton, yes and no. reading: “Laugh and the world laughs Whilst there’s no cure, there are solutions that can lessen with you. Snore and you sleep alone!” the effects of sleep disordered breathing, and in many cases Despite the attempt at humour, the problem can almost even be eliminated. it seems a rather bleak greeting to Forget costly and painful surgery, which can sometimes all prospective clients. Sure, I think, exacerbate the problem. Likewise, he says, many of the snoring can be annoying – memories of pillows, sprays and gadgets out there are “absolute rubbish”.

Christmas with my grandparents come to mind, where the Dr Koton explains that snoring is most often caused by a sound of Jingle Bells seemed to merge with the cacophonous constriction in the airways. For this reason he recommends ear-blasts emanating from their bedroom. But it can’t be that a simple device that fits relatively comfortably in the mouth bad, can it? and holds the lower jaw in a forward position to keep the Goodness, am I wrong. One minute with the good doctor, airways open so that air can move smoothly through the and suddenly I become fearful for every new relationship I’ll mouth and into the lungs. Dr Koton says this appliance has ever enter into. “Snoring is the biggest social disease in the reduced snoring in his patients by up to 90 percent.E world,” says Dr Koton. Hmm… Really?

He goes on to explain: “The majority of patients who come in are at their absolute wits’ end. To clarify, it’s usually not the patient but the spouse. Sleep apnoea is a major factor in causing relationships to end, where the snorer doesn’t realise how Sandy and John Fourie from Johannesburg have been married bad it is – until their partner has to sleep for more than 20 years. They arrived at Dr Dave Koton’s Snore in another room. It quickly leads to lack Clinic in a state of desperation. Sandy said she’d “absolutely of intimacy.” had it” with her husband’s snoring. By the time they consulted Dr With almost 40 percent of South Koton, they were already sleeping in separate bedrooms, and Africans suffering from snoring, clearly their marriage was collapsing. Sandy was more of a victim than it’s a big issue and especially for couples.

John. “Snoring never bothered me. It bothered my wife,” John Snoring is more pertinent among men – explains. Once John started using the appliance, sleep returned particularly as they get older – but it does to normal for both partners and they even traded their single beds affect women as well. for a double once again. “It has become the most important and Although the majority of snorers valuable asset in our lives,” Sandy says. “Whenever we go on believe they sleep well, their snoring holiday, the first thing I ask John is whether he has his gadget.” actually causes fragmented sleep resulting John is grateful to have his wife back beside him in bed, but he in them feeling tired in the morning, has also realised how detrimental his snoring had been. “Since suffering from headaches and exhaustion using the apparatus, I’m waking up feeling more refreshed and and just generally being more irritable. energised than I have been in years. I didn’t realise how much I Snoring is part of a spectrum of sleep had been deprived of oxygen because of the snoring.” disordered breathing problems that range from ’simple’ snoring on one end of the spectrum to obstructive sleep apnoea on the other. If you thought dealing with a snoring partner was the worst it could get, think again. It’s estimated that up to 18 percent of snorers are suffering from some form of sleep apnoea, ranging from mild to severe.

A MARRIAGE SAVED

PICTURES: GALLO IMAGES/GETTY IMAGES.

WHAT IS SLEEP APNOEA?

It is a form of respiratory arrest that lasts at least 10 seconds (or more) before your brain automatically wakes you up, usually with a very loud snore, in order to breathe again. For sufferers, this occurs more than ten times every hour – adding up to a lot of wakefulness and disturbed sleep, not to mention a dangerous lack of oxygen.

What’s more terrifying is that the majority of sufferers have no idea about their condition. Indeed, according to Dr Koton, “In the United States it’s estimated that sleep apnoea is a contributing factor in about 20 percent of fatal accidents – higher than even alcohol-related crashes.” This is most often due to the excessive sleepiness and the lack of concentration that comes with it. Not only are there physical risks related

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SLEEP APNOEA: THE WARNING SIGNS •

• • • • • • •

Extremely loud, heavy snoring, often interrupted by pauses and gasps.

Excessive daytime sleepiness.

Irritability and short temperedness.

Morning headaches.

Forgetfulness.

Changes in mood or behaviour.

Anxiety or depression.

Decreased interest in sex.

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EOAJourney

In what can only be described as a true African celebration, the launch of our magazine at the San Deck at the Sandton Sun in Joburg was attended by friends and business associates of our editor, Nawaal Mdluli. The launch saw more than 300 enthusiastic well-wishers make their way through a brewing Joburg afternoon storm to welcome Kwenta Media’s third publication into the industry. It truly was a day to remember with beautiful food, refreshing drinks and a tap on the shoulder to the team that worked so hard to launch our first black women’s lifestyle title.

Tumi Mdluli, Francois Louw, Nawaal Mdluli, and Jarred Doyle

Thina Mthembu, Bree Simelane, Nawaal and RosaMari Erasmus Arusha Paima and Nawaal

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Dott Mhlongo and Dodo Mathebula

Zenandi Mfenyana, Nawaal and Mapaseka Koetle ESSAYS OF AFRICA

PICTURES: TLADI KHULE

Aicha Maka and Sifa Tshiswaka

LAUNCH EOA

Tumi Mdluli and Jacky Mnisi

Taryn Sumpton and Meagan Smith

Nawaal with guests

Lelethu Tobi and Thuli Magubane

Thabo Serame and Mmabatho Mhange

Wandile and Jessica Jane Molebatsi E SSAY S OF A F R I C A

Mahlatse Malibe and Pearl Motsuku

Hlulani Masingi and Bree Simelane

Augustine Masilela Chuene, Tracy van der Berg and Buyi Ramashabo

Nono Mdluli, guest and Nawaal

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GROWING ON UP

MAPASEKA MOKWELE is prepping to send her second youngest to ‘big school’ in 2015.

CARYN THANDI PETERSEN asks her to share her words of wisdom for first-time parents.

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ADDITIONAL INFORMATION: MAMAS & PAPAS MAGAZINE. PICTURE: KAYA FM.

A

mother to five children, three of her own and two from her husband’s former marriage, Mapaseka Mokwele certainly has her work cut out as she navigates a thriving career as a media personality as host of Home on KayaFM, whilst raising her brood, ranging in age from one to 23.

Although her working life is busy, Mapaseka says she always makes time for her kids. “I try to be with them as much as possible during the day.

My mother was always there for me and I realise how instrumental that was in my life.” Having said that, she also believes there are benefits to her being a working mom. “My kids see me go off to work in the morning and come back later. There’s no doubt this helps foster a sense of independence and responsibility, which ultimately helps with them embracing their ‘jobs’ which is going to school each day.”

Having a child entering Grade One can be a daunting experience for any parent. Mapaseka has been through it with her older kids and is currently preparing her four-year-old for the milestone.

Although an emotional experience, she says it’s probably harder for her and her husband than it is for the kids. “I think we underestimate our children sometimes – they’re far more capable than we give them credit for.”

She describes how her husband and her parents accompanied her now 11-year-old to his first day of “big school” a few years ago. As soon as he arrived, he put down his backpack and found some children to play with, happily waving goodbye to the group of anxious adults.

Mapaseka laughs at the memory, saying she had to contain her emotion until she got to her car where she cried freely. “Kids are very clever,” she says. “I knew he would have noticed my panic and picked up on that, so I tried to keep my own anxiety at bay while I was with him. It definitely kept him calm throughout the process.”

MONITOR YOUR LITTLE ONE

Mapaseka’s advice is applicable to all parents with kids starting Grade One. The transition to formalised schooling is a time fraught with much anxiety for both parents and children, yet a parent’s predisposition goes a long way in either fuelling their child’s anxiety or diminishing it to some degree. Although it may be distressing to leave your crying child in an unfamiliar place, most teachers report that little ones regain their composure minutes after the parents leave.

Of course, it’s not only the first day of primary school that can be difficult, but the weeks and

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PARENTING EOA months that follow. Mapaseka believes that, “more than anything, we need to listen to our kids. We’ll soon pick up if there is a problem adjusting to their new environment.”

She remembers how, after a month of easy transitioning, her son started to hate school. She soon found out that his teacher was bullying him.

Mapaseka immediately took action by going to the teacher and the principal, demanding her son be moved to another class: “I even staged a sit-in in the principal’s office! I refused to move until the principal agreed to hear me out.”

Her persistence paid off and her son was moved to a new class, and she immediately saw the improvement in his attitude. “I knew that if I didn’t take action then, it could scar his entire schooling career. Grade one is a crucial year.”

Another important aspect for her is for the younger children to have sibling support. “The older ones help with normalising the experience.

They help with homework, and I believe this creates a sense of responsibility in them.”

As her younger children embark upon the experience of school, Mapaseka is not sad about them growing up. “I’m enjoying watching them grow. It’s a gift and I know I need to enjoy them now, and not worry about what can come later.”

“I’m enjoying watching them grow. It’s a gift and I know I need to enjoy them now…”

TOP TIPS FOR PARENTS

Adjustment time varies from one child to the next. But significant emotional distress can be gauged by marked behaviour changes in and outside the home and school. Feedback from the teacher is also useful, as they can give an objective appraisal of the child's progress.

LISTEN TO YOUR CHILD: Children inadvertently give us hints into their inner world through some of the stories they tell. Although your child may be settled into a routine after a few weeks at school, observe their behaviour closely. After a few weeks of settling time, answer these questions: How does your child seem to you when you drop them off at school? Are they enthusiastic or are they subdued? If they skip onto the playground and are happy to see their friends, this means they are adjusting well, but if you notice a persistent sense of reservation and hesitance, then monitor your little one closely.

ENCOURAGE CONFIDENCE: The skills needed to negotiate the first school days are not something that can be taught in the December holidays just before school starts. The trick is to start them off from a very young age by encouraging them to engage in behaviours that are comfortable for their unique personality and temperament. For example, greeting and introducing themselves to other children under your guidance, will allow them to feel more confident in continuing those sociable behaviours in other contexts.

SCHOOL IS FUN: Encourage your child to think of school as a fun and entertaining activity. Constantly remind them of the fun things they will be doing with their new friends and encourage them to embrace this new stage in their lives. E

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With a self-made fortune of about $7.2 billion, FOLORUNSO ALAKIJA has shattered the proverbial glass ceiling in business. CARYN THANDI PETERSEN gives us a glimpse into this Nigerian businesswoman’s phenomenal rise to success.

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ard work and persistence are the keys to success, if Africa’s richest black woman Folorunso Alakija is to be believed. According to Forbes magazine, she is the 96th most powerful woman in the world – and wealthier than Oprah Winfrey – so it follows that this 63-year-old might know a thing or two about success and how to achieve the highest rung on that ladder.

Born to a well-off family in Ikorodu, Lagos State in Nigeria, Folorunso has taken herself and her family to astral heights of wealth and power, and shows no signs of slowing down her meteoric rise. Although it was in Nigeria that Folorunso

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PICTURES: GOLDMYNE.TV; SHUGAENTERTAINMENT.COM.

Meet the Richest Black Woman

PROFILE EOA

would begin to achieve her success, much of her learning occurred in the United Kingdom, where she spent some of her formative years as a young girl. At age seven she enrolled at Dinorben School for Girls, part of the elite Hafodunos Hall in Wales. Four years at this illustrious school were followed by high school at Muslim High School in Sagamu Ogun State in Nigeria. A passion for learning, one that stuck with her for life, was engendered at a young age, and with it came dreams of studying law at a prestigious university.

Those dreams were to be dashed, however, by her father who found these ambitions unbecoming of a woman. He instructed her to pursue secretarial studies instead, and she found herself at Pitman’s Central College in London. “I felt as if my ability had been undermined. I felt frustrated!” says Folorunso in an interview with Nigerian magazine, Vanguard.

This initial disappointment was not to deter her, however, and with determination she set her mind to making a successful career from these humble beginnings.

She began as an executive secretary at Sijuade Enterprises in Lagos and rose swiftly from there. Stints at Finbank in Chicago in the United States and IBM followed, but despite these successes and her clear talent, she found herself continually overlooked for senior positions. “I decided to move out when I observed that new people were being ranked and promoted above me,” she explains.

Within no time she had a fashion powerhouse on her hands and established The Rose of Sharon Group, a holding company to look after all her business pursuits in the fashion industry. Her interests had expanded, however, and in 1993 she applied for the allocation of an oil prospecting licence in Nigeria. Another of her companies, Famfa Oil Limited, was awarded the rights to prospect a 617 000-acre bloc, situated about 113km off the coast of Nigeria.

It was her dealings in oil that catapulted Folorunso to the status of bona fide tycoon. On this point she often admits in interviews the perhaps “slightly fortuitous nature of the extent of her success”. According to her the bloc she had been awarded was one that no one had wanted, as the oil was located 1 500 metres below surface level, but speculative drilling soon discovered that oil had been collecting in the well for over 17 million years. Indeed a lifetime supply of oil and wealth.

And what of the future? While many at her age are looking forward to retirement, she isn't showing any signs of slowing down. Last year she was appointed as the vice-chairperson of the National Heritage Council and Endowment for the Arts in Nigeria. Her work in philanthropy, fashion, printing and oil continues to flourish.

“I never went to university and I am proud to say so because I don’t think I have done too badly. I’m 63 and I’m not yet done. So what is your excuse?” E

MOVING OUT, MOVING UP This pragmatic approach to adversity is one of Folorunso’s hallmarks. But it wasn’t only the absence of opportunities for upward business mobility that frustrated Folorunso; she also craved the spotlight and longed to make connections with the public.

Then she found the realisation of both her ambition and individualism in the fashion industry, which she entered directly after leaving her job at IBM. Taking her two youngest children with her, she moved back to the UK to study fashion design at the American College in London. Despite her insistence that hard work has been the primary feature of her business triumphs, she admits some place for natural talent.

“I would say my creativity has always been inborn,” she told Vanguard. In fashion, that creative energy was given space to thrive. She found immediate success in this industry, winning the national Fashion Designer of the Year in 1986. Three weeks before winning the award, she launched her fashion label Supreme Stitches, and with the recognition garnered from her prize-winning exploits, the label shot to nationwide prominence and had her designing clothes for many of Nigeria’s most important figures.

“I never went to university and I am proud to say so, because I don’t think I have done too badly. I’m 63 and I’m not yet done.”

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The Celebrant Mrs Alakija enjoying her day with her guests.

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Life After the Mother Wave

On 26 December 2014 it will be a decade since the most devastating tsunami hit countries along the Indian Ocean, killing an estimated 280 000 people.

MATTEO FAGOTTO travelled to Indonesia to meet with survivors of this natural disaster to record their journeys from devastating loss to rebuilding their lives.

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PICTURES: ©MATILDE GATTONI/TANDEM REPORTAGES

’m still traumatised by the experience. Every time I hear a small earthquake I start shaking and I go to the sea to check if everything is okay. I’m old and I can’t run away anymore,” explains 60-year-old Yasmanidar. Sitting under a shelter in the garden of her house in the village of Lampaseh, Yasmanidar considers herself extremely lucky. Out of the 6 000 original inhabitants of this village on the outskirts of Banda Aceh, only 300 survived the most powerful tsunami ever recorded in history.

At 7.59am on 26 December 2004, a 9.1-magnitude earthquake, whose epicentre was located 160km off the west coast of Sumatra, unleashed a series of deadly waves up to 30 metres high, which devastated the shores of 15 countries along the Indian Ocean, killing an estimated 280 000 people and displacing more than 1,6 million people. With 80 percent of the deaths recorded in Aceh, an Indonesian province located on the western tip of Sumatra, was the hardest hit. Here, the waves destroyed 800km of coastline, killing entire families and wiping out thousands of villages.

Today, rows of newly planted mangroves and a wall protect Lampaseh from the open sea. Only the ruined carcasses of three villas stand as a memento of what happened 10 years ago. But for soft-spoken Yasmanidar, whose sad smile betrays the terrible experience she went through, the memories are still very fresh.

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NEWS REPORT EOA

A family walks home after collecting mussels on the beach during low tide. Before the first tsunami wave hit, the water withdrew as far as the eye could see leaving kilometres of dry land covered in fish. Thousands of people made their way to the beach to gather the fish and were surprised by the first wave.

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Sulaiman Amin (above), Yasmanidar (left) and Salmi Hardiyanti (below left) all live to tell the tale of how they survived the 2004 tsunami that hit Indonesia and especially the regions they live in.

“The second wave smashed me on the ground, the third brought me up,” says Yasmanidar, who lost her husband and 30 other family members during the tragedy. Carried away for several kilometres by muddy waters full of sharp debris, she ended up on the second floor of a building, thanks to a hole in the wall. There she managed to climb on the roof, where she spent several hours waiting for help. “I was seeing people carried away by the water; corpses without heads and limbs... A lot of people were crying for help, but I couldn’t do anything,” she recalls.

Rescued by the Indonesian army, Yasmanidar spent the next six months in a hospital, recovering from an injury that had cut the back of her left foot in half, barely avoiding amputation. To this day, she still feels pain in her foot and cannot walk long distances.

STARTING FROM SCRATCH The waves completely flattened the coastal neighbourhoods of Banda Aceh, leaving the city with 90 000 deaths and no electricity, running water, roads or telephone lines. Ten years after the incident, the city is very different from the post-tsunami ghost town. Thanks to massive donations of aid money, which totalled close to R70 billion, the city was rebuilt in less than three years by hundreds of NGOs coordinated by the Indonesian Agency for the Rehabilitation and Reconstruction of Aceh (BRR).

All over the region, BRR reconstructed 140 000 houses, 1 700 schools and almost 4 000km of roads. The affected areas were turned into new residential complexes made of basic, identical matchbox houses, providing decent dwellings for more than 500 000 displaced in a relatively short period of time.

Today, a series of neat, wide boulevards, punctuated with palm trees and flowerbeds, link Banda Aceh’s bustling city

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NEWS REPORT EOA centre with the coastline. What is left of the former main seaport Ulee Lheue is now protected by a seawall, while other neighbourhoods have been shielded from the sea by rows of mangroves.

In case of another tsunami, the wide boulevards and a series of clearly indicated escape routes are supposed to facilitate the evacuation of the coastal areas, together with a brand new early warning system and several escape buildings made of large high-ground terraces that can shelter thousands of people.

IT'S GOD'S WILL Yet the emotional scars of that traumatic event are much more difficult to mend. A deeply religious Muslim society, Acehnese rationalised the event by ascribing it to the will of God and interpreting it as a wake-up call or punishment sent to a supposedly sinful community.

Sitting in the courtyard of the mosque in the village of Lampuuk, the 62-year-old imam Sulaiman Amin looks with admiration at the white-washed columns and giant black dome that withstood the rage of the water. “This mosque was the only building still standing after the tsunami. You can imagine the power of God,” he says solemnly. Amin, his wife and their son were engulfed by the waves. He never saw his family again, losing also a small rice processing factory for which he never received any compensation.

“Before I had money and a good life. Now I have no pension, no income and I have to survive on the alms of the people.”

Three years after the tsunami, Amin was chosen by the community to be the new imam, a job he takes great pride in. “I survived because of God’s will and I have to honour it,” he says convincingly. “Religion became the medicine in order to recover from our traumas.”

With the tenth anniversary approaching, Amin assures he will deliver a special sermon to the people. The message he wants to convey is as simple as it is important. “People lost their children and their families in that tragedy. I will ask them never to forget it.”

WORKING THROUGH THE PAIN Although the tsunami has affected the lives of thousands of people in Aceh, few have to relive the experiences of that terrible day like Salmi Hardiyanti does. A beautiful 23-year-old woman, with her round face elegantly wrapped in a colourful hijab, Hardiyanti works as a tourist guide in Banda Aceh, bringing visitors to see the several “museum boats” which were carried by the tsunami to the city centre and left stranded there as they are too heavy to be removed.

But it’s when visitors ask about her personal experience that Hardiyanti’s job becomes particularly tough. She lost 23 relatives, including

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her grandparents, two younger sisters and mother, who was pregnant at that time.

Living in a dormitory school on a hill close to Banda Aceh at that time, Hardiyanti never experienced the tsunami. After she heard about the tsunami that had destroyed her native village of Lampulo on the outskirts of Banda Aceh, she was prevented from going back by her teacher, who tried to spare her from the inevitable shock.

“I arrived in Lampulo only five days later,” explains Hardiyanti, who says she will never forget how she felt after seeing the destruction the tsunami left behind, with the foundation of her family home the only thing left standing.

“I remember my father telling me they couldn’t locate my mother. I had never cried so hard and so desperately in my life.” It took five years to cope with the sorrow.

To this day, Hardiyanti still has to keep herself busy in order not to think about that day. “I was very attached to my mother,” she says, while her voice trembles with emotion.

“Every time I had a problem, I used to call her for advice. That’s why if something goes wrong, my memories bring me down. I prefer to focus on the future.” Although the irony of her job is not lost on Hardiyanti, she says she is able to make the most of her circumstances. “I am actually happy to talk about my experience with the tourists,” she says with a proud smile. “They say I am a very strong woman.”

With the reconstruction now over, the region has gone back to its quiet, laid-back feel. The trip from Banda Aceh through the most affected areas is now a heavenly meander among lush, tropical hills and pristine beaches, occasionally interrupted by fishermen villages. Although this paradise hardly resembles a place where a tsunami could have wreaked havoc, the constant presence of the new matchbox houses is a reminder of the magnitude of the tragedy.

Here, the government had initially proposed the creation of a two-kilometre buffer zone along low-lying coastal areas, but the plan was abandoned after opposition from several coastal communities resolute to preserve their traditions and ancestral land.

Just like the majority of the people living along the coast of Aceh, Yasmanidar never considered the idea of leaving her home village.

Without children, she now spends time looking after her nephews, praying that the tsunami will not strike Lampaseh again.

As for her husband’s death, she accepted his death and her loss a long time ago. “When I was in the hospital he visited me in a dream. He told me to stop looking for him, because he was already at peace,” she recalls with a big smile lighting up her face. “I was so relieved to know he was okay.” E

“Before I had money and a good life.

Now I have no pension, no income and I have to survive on the alms of the people.”

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LOBOLA

Tradition or GREED Traditions are known to change and, over time, may even vanish from existence. Is the age-old southern African custom of lobola heading down a similar path, asks HAYDEN HORNER.

Left: Nolli Kekana at her traditional wedding.

Bottom: Nolli and Thapelo Kekana.

O

nce revered as a gesture of appreciation and a way of joining families through marriage, lobola is increasingly losing its appeal among the younger generation – some of whom are convinced the custom has become an institutionalised display of sexism and greed.

Sometimes translated as “bride price”, lobola is a customary southern African ritual whereby the man pays the family of his fiancée for her hand in marriage. While, in the past, payment was in cattle – the primary source of wealth in African society back then – times have changed, and so too has the economic landscape. The current tough economy has resulted in even tougher lobola negotiation strategies, often to the detriment of an otherwise strict and proud tradition in various cultures throughout the region.

Thapelo Kekana, a 34-year-old Johannesburg businessman, is of the opinion that the values of the practice are dying, and that people have turned it into a money-making event. “Negotiators are out of touch with the person they’re representing and potential grooms have become skeptical about the practice as they witness so many like themselves being taken for a ride,” says Thapelo. These days, cash and cars have replaced livestock, and when greed becomes a factor, grooms are left with either their hearts or their bank accounts in tatters.

Luckily for Thapelo, his negotiators remained true to the custom and conducted themselves as closely to the old traditions as possible, albeit it as recently as six years ago, when the tradition was already well on its way to changing. “My negotiators, who happened to be my uncles, are familiar with the old customs and knew exactly what I was looking for and how to negotiate accordingly,” he says proudly.

A MARRIAGE OF OLD AND NEW

In rural South Africa, the essence of traditional lobola is still observed and livestock remains the preferred currency, but for urban dwellers such as Thapelo and his wife Nolli, the custom had to be adapted to their modern settings. Traditionally, the man would start the process by sending a letter to his future bride’s parents – either with a representative or the bride-to-be. “Thapelo just popped it in our postbox himself. I guess he didn’t trust anyone to deliver it,” Nolli recalls with a giggle.

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PICTURES: NOLLI AND THAPELO KEKANA. SOURCES: AANNAIM.LAW.EMORY.EDU; IRINNEWS.ORG; GIRLSNOTBRIDES.ORG; SRHRGUIDE.ORG.

MAN FEATURE EOA Once her parents had interrogated her about Thapelo and their intentions, it was agreed that negotiations would begin. Nolli and Thapelo were denied contact during the negotiations and, in the preceding week, Nolli’s recently married cousin was appointed as her guide. “My cousin called a week before to let me know she’d made our beaded maiden outfits and firmly instructed me not to see Thapelo until the negotiations were finalised,” recalls Nolli.

As is customary, the wives of the bride’s uncles (her adoptive mothers) are each given a blanket or shawl, and a headscarf, which they have to wear every time they come into contact with the groom. “These items are worn as a sign of respect to the groom’s family and for the individuals to be easily identified as the family of the bride’s,” explains Nolli.

The biological mother of the bride receives an axe to gather wood for the fire, a pot as a symbol of feeding her new relatives, and a dress, shawl and headscarf. The father, who would normally receive a horse, is presented with a modern-day equivalent, either in the form of a bicycle, car or cash. He is also given a coat and hat, while the paternal grandmother receives a blanket and headscarf. If the grandmother has passed away, someone is nominated to accept this on her behalf.

“My uncles had to announce their arrival at Nolli’s family home by singing folksongs at the gate. In some instances, depending on how good or bad their singing is, they may have to do this for hours before their presence is acknowledged,” says Thapelo.

Nolli says while it’s quite an important step in gaining access to the bridal home, there’s no reason why the bride’s family can’t have some fun judging the vocal skills of the groom’s negotiators and testing their determination. “They [Thapelo’s uncles] are not the best singers around, but they were eventually accepted into the home to barter on my behalf,” says Thapelo.

From thereon out, it’s quite a laborious exercise in negotiation strategy and skill, and everything has its small price. The father, or an uncle of the bride, sits in a tree and must be paid to come down for the meeting to begin. He must then also receive invulamlomo (loosely translated as payment to open his mouth). Before negotiations start, the groom’s men have to identify the correct maiden from a number of women covered with blankets. And then only the bride price and worth is decided.

WHEN GREED MEETS TRADITION

Lobola, like most traditions that are adapted to modern-day living, has fallen victim to distortion.

“The younger generation sometimes forgets the practice is there to create a bond and create trust between two families,” explains Thapelo, himself

E SSAYS OF A F R I C A

“The original purpose of lobola has been misapprehended, distorted and often manipulated in our modern society.”

a man of the times and whom Nolli considered “a bit too modern for my liking” during their courting phase.

In his research paper, Lobola And Misuse Of Culture, Mbuyiselo Botha writes that lobola originally meant ubuhlobo (friendship) between the families, but the tradition has, in recent times, been tarnished by greed and an intention to get rich quickly. He also states, “The original purpose of lobola has been misapprehended, distorted and often manipulated in our modern society.”

As the intention of the practice shifts from being a formality to a financial transaction, it places financial burdens on prospective husbands and recently married couples. But Nolli and Thapelo are not one of those couples. “For us, the cultural aspects of lobola are significant. We upheld the original intention as much as we could during the negotiation process and we are the better for it,” says Nolli.

“We look forward to facilitating such an occasion when our two children reach this milestone. I can’t wait to see Thapelo sit in a tree quietly, especially since he’s such a chatterbox.”

THE PRICE OF RIGHTS ABUSE

At the northern tip of the continent, in Algeria, Morocco and Libya, “bride price”, also forms an integral part of the marital process.

Here, women and young girls often have no say in the choice of groom, whom in many cases is usually their first cousin.

Although laws limit the minimum age of marriage to around 16 for girls, they are married earlier because young virgins fetch a handsome price for the bride’s family. Again, a primary factor in the age of the girl (some as young as nine) is whether she’s urban or rural.

Because these young girls are not mature enough to accommodate their much older grooms sexually, they fall victim to fistula during childbirth. Fistula is when holes form between the vaginal wall and the bladder during complicated childbirth, through which urine or faeces, or both, continuously leak. Because of the stench, the girls are then sent back to their parents, who often insist they return to their husbands so they keep the bride price. These girls are then subjected to physical violence or even murdered – all for the purpose of money. And it’s these abuses that have put practices such as lobola in the international spotlight, with human rights groups calling for the abolishment of these practices.

A study conducted by the Tanzania Media Women Association, in 2006, claimed bride price contributes to women suffering sexual abuse, battery and being denied the right to own property. However – whether for the sake of tradition, instant wealth, or to prevent the progress of young women and girls – practices involving bride price continue to form part of the cultural fibre of many countries in Africa and other parts of the globe, and the efforts to abolish it remain at the centre of human rights discussions. E

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#GAYBESTFRIEND EOA

RUTH'S DEGREE IN SIGNS Ruth needed a friend , but not just any old friend…

She needed a #gaybestfriend.

BY HAYDEN HORNER

PICTURES: HAYDEN HORNER.

Hello again, darlings.

It’s that time of year when everyone is either throwing a fabulous party or being invited to one, and Ruth and I are no strangers to parties, although sometimes, I do have to wonder about Ruthless. I swear, for all her fabulosity, she sometimes doesn’t have a clue – especially when it comes to men and reading flirting signals.

So, there we are at one of our long list of parties, and Ruthless and I are wearing our most come-hither labels: me in Markham and Mr Price (but Zara and Country Road if anyone asks), and Ruth in her little red Valentino cocktail dress. Not Valentino the international designer to the stars, but rather Valentino, the Angolan immigrant from downtown Johannesburg. Good fakes are worth the risk of being mugged in broad daylight, but that’s a story for another time.

At the party, I’m turning green in the face as the hostess apparently has a halitosis problem that no one has pointed out to her. I’m about to recommend a great dentist (also downtown and worth the risk), when I notice a fine brother checking out Miss Ruthless’ form. I leap into rescue mode because, you see, as with most nerdy girls such as my lovely Ruth they often have no clue they’re being hit on. For someone with a Masters Degree in Medical Science, Ruth cannot read flirting signs. I, however, have a Degree in Signs.

So I make my escape from the whiff of the hostess’ breath, which would be a brownish-green if bad breath had colour and I’m next to Ruth, whose eye are glued to a fake Monet painting near the bar. I whisper: “Three o’clock. No looooove, your other three o’clock. Never mind, just look right. Mister Grey Jacket and White T-shirt.

Future baby-daddy.”

Unfortunately, we were a little slow and Mister Grey got snatched up by halitosis hosty’s sister who, despite her loose morals, clearly knows a hot flirty man when she sees one.

E SSAY S OF A F R I C A

The next day, slightly hung over, I broke it down for Ruth: 1. If he smiles at you, he is interested.

2. If he moistens his lips by licking them, he is interested and straight.

3. If he moistens his lips by applying lip gloss, he’s gay.

4. If he comes up to you, he is interested.

5. If he compliments your dress, he wants to get you out of it.

6. If he asks about your designer, he’s gay and wants Valentino’s number.

7. If it’s a fake Monet painting, it’s not interesting or worth your time.

8. If we risk our lives getting a good fake designer dress, you’d better work it!

Needless to say, we are still working towards Ruthless’ Degree in Signs. I’m confident, with my help, she too will graduate with flying colours. E

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EOA MAN SHOPPING

MEN AT WORK TUMI MDLULI helps the man in your life suit up for the workplace – be it for a manic Monday or casual Friday.

White shirt, R499, Soviet at Zando.

Jacket and pants suit, R11 400, Hugo Boss.

Explorer satchel, R4 800, Missibaba.

Black and grey tie, R460, Zara.

FORMAL LOOK Brown leather shoes, R1 399, Zara.

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Brown belt, R480, Polo at Stuttafords.

Glasses, R899, Von Zipper.

ESSAYS OF AFRICA

MAN SHOPPING EOA Glasses, R400, Von Zipper.

Grey blazer, R1 299, Fabiani.

CASUAL LOOK Brown belt, R705, Bloomingdales.

White shirt, R4 200, Hugo Boss.

Socks, R129, Happy Socks at Stuttafords.

Brown leather notebook pouch, R2 600, Missibaba.

Jeans, R500, Zara.

Welder watch, R9 399, JP. Time.

Grey sneakers, R899, Billabong.

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EOA MAN INTERVIEW How did you get the name ‘Mister Sales’?

After a month in my new job I was named sales agent of the month. By my second month I had broken existing records with 300 sales averaging 15 a day at a premium of R55 per sale. I was promoted to team leader, managing 12 agents averaging 1.2 sales per hour, daily. Soon thereafter, an opportunity arose in the company’s international online gaming division.

After two months in this position I started calling clients to get them to spend more. The company had no outbound department and I was the only person doing this, so I sold the call centre head on my idea to create this department. One month later I was heading up this division with 14 agents who were converting players at a rate of 14 per agent, per shift – and so I became known as ‘Mister Sales’.

Was achieving these great results so quickly an easy achievement for you?

It wasn’t easy. It required stamina and a sense of humour to work 18-hour shifts, seven days a week. But sales is my passion and I have always chosen to lead when most would only follow. It took commitment, and the ability to delegate and identify the best team for the job.

At his lowest, THAAMIR MOERAT begged for a job and today his success knows no bounds. HAYDEN HORNER interviews him.

What circumstances led you to work in sales?

Although I grew up in a wealthy family, my dad lost everything when I was 20 years old, and I was forced to look for work. I was penniless when I arrived at the interview for a call centre sales position. I had no experience but I was hungry – literally and figuratively. The was thinking: “I’ve got to get this job!” In the interview I cried when I told the interviewer how much I needed this job and, if he taught me and gave me the opportunity, he would not have to pay me until I’d proven myself.

He said: “Show me you can make a sale today and you can come back tomorrow.” I made a sale at 9pm to a lady called Mama. That’s how I got into sales, and she inspired the title of my first book, Mama, I Sold You.

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What are your thoughts on women in business?

I often hear my female employees say: “We need to work harder than men to prove ourselves and to constantly prove our value to the organisation.”

It is still very much a male-dominated society but we, as business owners, are going to fall short if we don’t start changing that mindset and acknowledging, and put to use, the impressive business and leadership skills of women.

Do you have any advice for young upcoming entrepreneurs?

Stay hungry, stay driven and never give up!

What are your future plans?

In addition to season two of SellHard, the launch of Faselis SA PR and marketing software and my business sales company TalkToSales.biz, I am also busy with my second book, The Next Best, which will be on shelves early in 2015. E

ESSAYS OF AFRICA

PICTURES: SUPPLIED BY THAAMIR MOERAT

MISTER SALES

When did you get the idea to build your own brand?

At the call centre I created the training manual, Tele-marketing: The Entertainer’s Approach, on how to sell in an entertaining manner. Following on its success was my first book, Mama, I Sold You, on how to sell any product. Soon thereafter I came up with the SellHard reality show, which I co-own with model and entrepreneur, Tracy McGregor. The show identifies raw sales talent and presents them with various challenges to see how they think on their feet. Season 1 just ended and audition entries for season two is now open at Sellhard.co.za.

polo.co.za (+27) 011- 258 -7600

POLO SINCE 1976

SANDTON, ROSEBANK, EASTGATE, MENLYN, CAVENDISH, V&A WATERFRONT

PICTURES: SUPPLIED BY SPAS; VUYISWA MOTHLABANE.

A LOVE SO DIVINE

Few pleasures compare to an invigorating spa treatment when you want to unwind or fan the flames of romance. VUYISWA MOTHLABANE entices you and your lover to try these top South African spas.

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Kloofzicht

BEAUTY EOA

Nestled in the foothills of the Zwartkops Mountains in the Cradle of Humankind, Kloofzicht Spa is the essence of tranquility and ultimate luxury. An easy 40-minute drive from Johannesburg or Pretoria, the spa provides a sanctuary for those looking to indulge in a variety of massages, facials, manicures, pedicures and tailor-made spa packages aimed at balancing the body, mind and soul.

The small but magnificent nature reserve upon which Kloofzicht is built is also home to kudu, impala, blue wildebeest, eland, red hartebeest, springbuck, gemsbok and zebra, as well as a fascinating array of bird life, meaning you’ll be at one with nature while you’re being pampered. We suggest…

FOR HER: SUMMER SIREN Just in time for the season of sun, this package has all the ingredients needed for you to show off your radiant skin or flaunt your freshly pampered feet in reveal-all heels or sandals.

This treatment comprises: - 60-minute aroma massage - 30-minute skin treatment - 30-minute mini pedicure or foot grooming - 30-minute paraffin hand treatment - A Spa Café lunch - A spa gift to take home.

FOR HIM: GROOM’S PACKAGE Being a man shouldn’t be a roadblock when it comes to pampering. After all, those demanding manly responsibilities such as a really long round of golf with the guys or lifting a little more weights than usual at the gym, can take their toll. So, why not enjoy a onehour treatment that includes an invigorating massage to loosen knots and tense muscles, hand grooming to soothe golf club-calloused hands, and a sole soother to get your feet ready for another trek around the golfing green.

WHAT WE LOVED The Treat-for-Two package that’s specifically tailored for couples. It’s a romantic pampering session that includes a 90-minute massage with his and hers essential oils, and a cheese and chocolate platter lunch at the Spa Café.

FOR MORE INFORMATION Call: 011 317 0640 Email: spaadmin@kloofzicht.co.za Visit: Kloofzichtspa.co.za

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Askari

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he Big Five, the majestic Magaliesburg mountain range and tales of the area’s rich archeological and cultural history are all part of the attraction that is Askari Spa and Lodge. Located in the heart of the lodge, the spa, in addition to a selection of uniquely themed treatment rooms, opens up to the outdoors offering visitors the chance of being wooed by one or more of the Big Five as you enjoy your session. Between treatments you can take a leisurely stroll along the venue’s numerous pathways, which meander through its beautiful surrounding gardens.

For centuries, African women have utilised natural herbal concoctions, creams and oils to enhance their beauty and to maintain good health. Askari takes its cue from this history and have formulated a range of natural therapies to enhance, invigorate and rejuvenate the senses. The spa combines both ancient and contemporary techniques in a natural way, designed to bring balance and harmony. but if you find it hard to choose, we recommend the following‌ FOR HER: WATER This treatment is perfect you, because, just like water, the modern woman is constantly moving as she faces daily stresses and challenges. It aims to banish fatigue and sluggishness associated with jetlag, water retention and high stress levels and the movements are designed to stimulate and invigorate you through a refreshing application of cypress and menthol

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BEAUTY EOA oil to specific areas. This treatment has a cleansing effect, leaving you refreshed and ready to face those challenges again.

FOR HIM: HOT STONE MASSAGE Perfect for the man whose work and life pressures are as unforgiving as fiery flames. This massage offers unparalleled benefits with continuous heat and pressure, creating the most powerful and long lasting results. Smooth river stones are heated to the perfect body temperature before seamlessly gliding over your body to create a synergy of warmth and deep therapeutic work.

You’ll experience the highest level of relaxation and unsurpassed bliss – just what the doctor ordered for you to bounce back into your daily work deadlines and family responsibilities.

WHAT WE LOVED The Sunday Night Sleepover is perfect for couples and guarantees an energised and refreshed start to the week ahead. It includes one night in an executive room (with the possibility of a deluxe room upgrade), complimentary access to all spa facilities, a one-hour treatment, dinner and breakfast. The perfect way to banish those often blue Mondays.

FOR MORE INFORMATION Call: 014 577 2658/9 Email: spa@askarilodge.co.za Visit: Askarispa.co.za

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EOA BEAUTY

The One & Only SPA

t

he One & Only Spa, situated in the heart of Cape Town, is an oasis of serenity and the perfect escape for a day of rejuvenation.

Rated as the most expansive and comprehensive spa in the Western Cape, it offers a range of tailored holistic experiences, ranging from pure relaxation to unique wellness – all designed for complete sensory indulgence.

Defining personal service and quiet indulgence, the 12 treatment rooms embrace local African influences, combined with contemporary design and are all located on the landscaped Spa Island. And because we know you’ll be hard-pressed to decide between the four signature treatments, we recommend…

FOR HER: THE HOLISTIC BODY RITUAL It’s a fusion of body treatments aimed at providing a personalised experience. Each ritual begins with a full body exfoliation followed by a body wrap with warming oshadi oils, detoxifying algae or nourishing marine mud. A scalp massage and fullbody aromatherapy massage completes this all-encompassing two-hour experience.

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BEAUTY EOA

FOR HIM: THE UNWIND EXPERIENCE This is ideal if you feel jetlagged, dehydrated or stressed. The body is cleansed with a soothing foam exfoliation, followed by a relaxing massage with long strokes and gentle rocking movements. Warm volcanic stones are used to soothe and release tension from tired muscles, followed by a calming scalp massage.

WHAT WE LOVED The option of having your hair styled by one of the Mother City’s most sought-after hair stylists, Wayne Gates – perfect for bridal parties or a special dinner date. A stylist to both sexes, Wayne’s top services include colouring, highlights and up-styles.

FOR MORE INFORMATION Call: 021 431 5810 Email: Spa.Reservations@oneandonly capetown.com Visit: Capetown.oneandonlyresorts.com/ spa.aspx

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BEAUTY EOA

Zebula A mere two hours’ drive north of Johannesburg, in the magnificent Waterberg region of Limpopo, lies The Spa At Zebula. Here, world-class spa therapies meet natural design, textures and ethnic elements to pay homage to Africa. Zebula’s nine private treatment rooms on raised decks overlook the bushveld, and a range of treatments and therapies will leave you spoilt for choice. But whatever treatment you choose, you’re guaranteed a sensory journey of body, mind and soul.

Between sessions, you’re invited to spend time in their private garden, which features two large open-air heated relaxation tubs or to take a refreshing splash in the indoor heated pool. Highly trained and attentive therapists are on hand to ensure your desired treatment is a memorable one. We suggest you try…

FOR HER: AFRICAN INDIGENOUS BALM MASSAGE This 75-minute natural therapy combines a special blend of rooibos, marula, baobab, kigelia and honeybush to give you a true African bushveld experience. It starts with a back exfoliation and ends with a balm massage, suited to your pressure preference. It’s guaranteed to leave your skin soft and nourished, with your muscles totally relaxed.

FOR HIM: SPORTS MASSAGE Carried out by a registered sports massage therapist, this treatment is perfect for the man who suffers the aches and pains of a demanding work or fitness regime. Relax as your therapist zones in on specific problem areas and helps restore them to their full working order.

WHAT WE LOVED The Yummy Mummy package is uniquely designed for the benefit of expectant moms, because no one deserves to be spoilt more than a pregnant woman. It consists of a full-body buff exfoliation and omega massage, a head and face massage, as well as a balm cuticle treatment, tummy rub, and a belly masque and foot treatment. Also included in the package is a goodie bag and lunch or breakfast. Note: Not recommended in first trimester without written authorisation from your doctor. E

FOR MORE INFORMATION Call: 041 734 7700 Email: reception@zebula.co.za Visit: Zebula.co.za

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EOA BEAUTY

1

OPTIPHI HYDRA-DERM HA MASQUE, R650.

Actively targets signs of ageing by tightening and lifting the skin. New year, new face!

SEXY

2

ELIZABETH ARDEN VISIBLE DIFFERENCE HYDRATION BOOST NIGHT MASK, R290.

Lather it onto your face overnight, and wake up with a healthy glow.

Seven

7

PICTURES: SUPPLIED BY STOCKISTS.

TWEEZERMAN SMOOTH FACIAL HAIR REMOVER, R290. Precision brow shaping in the palm of your hand.

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love!

3

SORBET SMOOTHING BODY SCRUB ENERGISING, R40.

Scrub away dull skin and energise your body.

4 5

VUYISWA MOTHLABANE’S top picks to make your skin glow this month.

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EXTRA ORDINARY EYE GEL, R450.

Stop early signs of ageing with this fragrance-free eye gel that’s suitable for all skin types.

We love the spatula that ensures precise application.

NIVEA DAILY ESSENTIALS MOISTURISING DAY CREAM, R60. Say goodbye to unbecoming shine and hello to nourishing moisture. Go on, try it!

REDKEN CERAFILL RETALIATE HAIR RE-DENSIFYING TREATMENT, R530.

Are you struggling with thinning tresses and a receding hairline? Go back to your hair’s glory days with this product.

ESSAYS OF AFRICA

BEAUTY EOA

HAIR TIP

Are you struggling with thinning tresses and a receding hairline? Go back to your hair’s glory days with Redken’s Cerafill product range for thinning hair. R150 Resulte Hair loss Tonic & Growth Booster.

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! e v o l

HAIR Tips VUYISWA MOTHLABANE is all about the shine and shimmer this month.

2

s l i o t s be

We recommend these two oil products to replenish hair moisture and enhance growth, too.

CAIVIL OIL MOISTURISER, AND CAIVIL OIL MOISTURISER SPRAY, R20 EACH.

PICTURES: SUPPLIED BY STOCKISTS.

MOROCCANOIL GLIMMER SHINE FINISH, R290.

E SSAY S OF A F R I C A

PUREOLOGY SUPER SMOOTH SMOOTHING CREAM, R323.

Our absolute favourite this month, it helps to control frizz and unruly volume. This moisturising formula intensifies natural shine, while protecting colour vibrancy with its ThermalAntiFadeComplex for heat-styling protection.

THE BEAUTY INSIDER For thousands of years women have been trying different methods to keeping to keep their hair hydrated, and coconut oil has always been a firm favourite among black women.

Coconut oil is known to improve hair cuticles, feed the scalp and repair damaged hair in no time.

MIZANI ROSEWATER HAIRDRESS CONDITIONER, R182.

This enriched hairdress contains natural origin oils and botanical extracts formulated to replenish moisture and add a soft, silky sheen to dull/dry hair. It also helps to prevent split ends and styling damage, ensuring shiny, healthy looking hair.

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Beyond the Blue C49329

BEAUTY EOA

Make-up

MAESTRO

VUYISWA MOTHLABANE chats to VUYO VAROYI, the first person to hold the prestigious title of national make-up artist for beauty giant Revlon in South Africa.

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‘It’s really amazing and a lot of fun to work with Bonang Matheba. I feel lucky to be working with her because she loves make-up...’

– Vuyo Varoyi

Who was your biggest inspiration when you were younger? I would have to say my mom. As a single parent she did her best to raise six children by herself, and she made sure we had the best education. It if wasn’t for her, I wouldn’t be where I am today. She taught me that with courage, perseverance and self-belief you can conquer anything. I salute you, Mom!

think about life and my career. Thirdly, I would have to say the honour of becoming Revlon SA’s first ever national make-up artist. Not only has my work been recognised by a large global brand, but it has also created so many opportunities for me to build my career. I owe Revlon a huge thank you for that.

What were you like as a teenager? I was very reserved and very shy, and I think I’m still like that [laughs].

Was it always your dream to become a make-up artist? My love of art and creativity initially led me to fashion designing, but when I moved to Joburg I developed a strong passion for make-up artistry. If I think back now I remember how I used to steal my mom’s make-up and practise on my sisters, and guess what, it was make-up from Revlon! Also, I love a good challenge and at the time when I moved to Joburg, being a male make-up artist was taboo and that made me want to do it even more.

Life is a journey. What would you say are your three most significant life-changing moments, and why? Coming to Johannesburg to pursue my dreams is the first one. I was exposed to a whole new world of possibilities.

Secondly, the gift of being able to travel all over the world has opened my mind to new possibilities and especially how I

Did you study to become a make-up artist? What does that process involve? Yes, I studied make-up artistry but, in my opinion, quite a bit of the skill you end up teaching yourself as you gain more experience. Having your unique style is also something that sets you apart from other make-up artists and I think this is important. I also enrolled for

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PICTURES: VUYO VAROYI, REVLON SA.

Where did you grow up and what was your family life like? I was born and bred in Gugulethu in Cape Town. I have five siblings, all girls, and I’m the only boy.

Growing up we were all very close to each other.

BEAUTY EOA a two-year course at a school of professional make-up. In your first year you study theory, including the history of make-up, and then in the second year you learn about the practical side, including how to apply various types of make-up such as stage make-up and broadcast or FX make-up.

Who is your biggest inspiration in the industry and why? I’d say Beyoncé. I grew up watching her career grow from nothing to where she is today. It is evident that her work ethic is incredible, and her ability to build such a huge brand and remain humble is very inspiring. Believing in herself and that nothing is impossible is something that all of us can learn from her… yes, I love her and I can carry on singing her praises forever [laughs]. So, I’m really following her example to build my career and my brand.

Being named the National Make-Up Artist for Revlon is quite the feather in your cap. Did you ever imagine that you could reach these heights in your career? I am truly blessed to have been chosen from so many talented professionals to represent the brand.

Honestly, I’m just doing what I love and to be rewarded for following your passion is truly an honour. I hope to be an inspiration to all young, aspiring make-up artists to encourage them to keep pushing so that they too may get the same opportunity that I have had.

What are your responsibilities as the national make-up artist? I’m very proud to be associated with such an iconic brand. My duties include raising awareness of the brand; working with the local brand ambassador, Bonang Matheba, and to ensure that she always looks flawless when she steps out in public. I’m also part of the creative team who conceptualises the local Revlon billboard, print and television advertising campaigns, as well the head make-up artist at all fashion weeks and product activation events.

What is it like to work with Bonang Matheba?

It’s really amazing and a lot of fun. I feel lucky to be working

with her because she loves make-up and enjoys experimenting with different looks all the time.

What are your top two make-up trends for this summer? Inspired by the 1960s, cat-eye-lined eyes are really hot this summer, and Bonang rocks this look so amazingly well.

I also love dewy skin – this is when the face is not too matte but has a more fresh-for-summer look, as if you’ve just had a refreshing facial.

And what are your fashion hits for girls and guys this summer? Girls should go all out with denim shorts, vests and a splash of tartan. A must-have for guys are a pair of dungarees in any fabric and at least one check shirt.

What are the five must-have beauty items that every woman should carry with her? Mascara, powder, lip gloss, bronzer and liquid liner.

What is the secret to male grooming? It’s really no different to women – cleanse, exfoliate, tone and moisturise your skin. Also, boys, don’t be afraid to wear powder at night, and never leave home without your lip balm. No one wants to kiss dry lips!

Who is your best friend and what makes that person special? My family really fulfills the role of being my best friend. They mean everything to me and I can always count on their love and support. I’m also very spiritual and without God I wouldn’t be where I am today.

Where are you going on holiday in December?

Cape Town – it’s home and I love being with my family. I’ve also started an events company, The Pop-Up Crew, with three friends and we’re planning a Pop-Up Party in the Mother City.

Where do see yourself in five years’ time? My biggest dream is to have my own cosmetics line and to inspire others to follow in my footsteps. E

VUYO’S AB FAB LIST

Song: Don’t Run So Fast by Rahsaan Patterson Movie: Inception starring Leonardo DiCaprio Restaurant: The Smokehouse Grill in Braamfontein, Joburg City: New York City Dessert: Crème brûlée

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Luscious lips

EOA BEAUTY

VUYISWA MOTHLABANE helps your pout look perfect.

ELIZABETH ARDEN, BEAUTIFUL COLOUR MOISTURIZING LIPSTICK IN RED DOOR, R210.

CLARINS ROUGE ECLAT LIPSTICK IN TROPICAL PINK, R270.

LIP SERVICE

PICTURES: SUPPLIED BY STOCKISTS.

REVLON COLORBURST MATTE BALM IN AUDACIOUS AND UNAPOLOGETIC, R130.

YARDLEY SUPERMOIST LIPSTICK IN CARRIAGE BRONZE, R80.

1. Remove flaky, dry skin from your lips by exfoliating with sugar and water.

2. Don’t be afraid to use lip liner, but remember to blend it into the lipstick or lip gloss.

There’s nothing worse than visible lip liner.

3. Ensure your lip product stays put by blotting the lips after each coat and following it up with powder before applying another coat. Long-lasting lips for days!

4. For the ultimate finishing touch, use a lip brush to apply the product. This will ensure even application and long-lasting lipstick.

5. Matte, glossy or creamy finishes are in abundance – but check what works best with the look you’re going for.

YARDLEY LONGWEAR LIPS IN WATERMELON, R100.

L’ORÉAL COLLECTION EXCLUSIVE DOUTZEN,R150.

PHYSICIAN’S FORMULA SEXY BOOSTER SEXY GLOW GLOSSY STAIN IN HOT RED (FAR LEFT) AND HOT PINK (LEFT), R145 EACH.

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BEAUTY & HEALTH NEWS EOA

WATCH WHAT YOU EAT & HOW YOU EAT IT

WORDS: HLULANI MASINGI. SOURCES: MEAGAN SMITH, TWINCARE INTERNATIONAL; BIOSENSE; KARABO MOROKANE. PICTURES: BIOSENSE; SEVEN STAR; ©iSTOCK.COM.

Karabo Morokane, physiotherapist for the Vodacom Blue Bulls rugby team, shares his fitness and healthy eating tips.

• Eat five small portions per day – smaller portions more regularly throughout the day will boost your metabolism.

• Avoid late-night meals – allow your body two to three hours to digest what you’ve eaten before you go to bed.

• Don’t starve yourself – you’ll deprive your body of vital nutrients that are needed to stay healthy.

• Avoid binge-eating – this isn’t healthy for your metabolism and will have a negative effect on your body in the long run.

MINDFUL FITNESS Are you looking for a private gym where you’re known by your first name? The Seven Star Energy Centre in Parkmore, Johannesburg, offers that personal touch while you work out. Founder Peri Zourides says, “Our goals focus on training your mind and then your body.”

The gym also offers custom programmes, such as the high-intensity kettlebell and body-weight training to decrease body fat and build lean muscle mass, while reducing stress. For more information, call 072 961 5583 or visit 7sec.co.za.

BLONDE AMBITION

You’ve gone blonde and now you’re worried that it may fade as you have fun in the sun.

But with Biosense Ultra Violet Spray, a leave-in treatment, you have nothing to worry about. Spray onto wet or dry hair, and then blow-dry your locks.

It’s perfect for everyday maintenance on blonde or highlighted hair. For more information, go to Biosense.com.

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SIMPLE SOPHISTICATION

EOA’s best celeb make-up look at the recently held American Music Awards goes to none other than soul diva, Mary J. Blige. She rocked a chic nude lip and smoky eye, which complemented her blonde hair and caramel skin tone perfectly, proving that simplicity is the foundation to a sophisticated red-carpet look. We love it! E

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Take It Outside

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FOOD & ENTERTAINING EOA

GET THE LOOK: Picnic throw, R650, Woolworths. Striped cushions, R170 each, Mr Price Home. Drinks dispenser, R329 (part of set), @Home. 24-piece plastic cutlery set, R300, Mr Price Home. Melamine Fiesta platter, R229, Country Road.

Cosmo sparkling lemon and cranberry flavoured drinks, R33 (4 x 275ml), Woolworths. Pineapple tealight holders, R120, Woolworths. Wooden platter board, from R649, Yuppiechef.com. Melamine Fiesta Bowl, R79 each, Country Road. Chinese lanterns, from R40 each, In Good Company. Paper straws, R50, Typo. Picnic basket, R599, @Home. Large plastic plate, R20; side plate, R16, bowl, R16, all from Mr Price Home. Melamine salad servers, R129, Country Road.

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DELISH SNACKS… the easy way!

Beautiful weather and lazy lunches make for holiday feasting that’s fun and relaxed. CHESKA STARK features recipes from the cookbook Girls On Fire and helps you set up the perfect outdoors feast.

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RECIPES AND PICTURES: JACANA MEDIA. ADDITIONAL PHOTOGRAPHY: ROXANNE LINDENBENG.

(Girls On Fire, R175, Jacana Media)

The best thing about hosting a summertime picnic is that there are no rules – snacks become starters and the more casually things are presented, the better. Our tricks for already-prepped picnicking snacks include: § Think about what you would like your guests to eat and if in doubt go for fresh foods. § Fruits that are synonomous with summer such as watermelon, grapes and litchis are good choices, and include some baby carrots for easy snacking too. § Head to your local bakery and buy a selection of fresh breads, and no need to pack a bread knife because you’ll be doing it like the French do – tearing and dipping the bread before enjoying every morsel. § What’s a picnic without a dip, right?

Head to your local supermarket and buy a selection that includes hummus and tzatziki. § Don’t forget other deli favourites such as marinated artichokes (Woolies stocks the most delicious ones) and olives are always a hit.

ESSAYS OF AFRICA

FOOD & ENTERTAINING EOA

This recipe also makes a quick and easy weekday meal.

Cook the stuffed chicken breasts at 180oC for 25 minutes and serve with stir-fried vegetables.

STUFFED CHICKEN BREASTS Ingredients

(Serves 8 to 12) § 8 to 12 chicken breast fillets § 4 tsp wholegrain mustard § 250g Emmental cheese § 16 sage leaves § 500g streaky bacon § Salt and pepper

Method

1. On the thick side of each breast, start at the wide end and cut a pocket into it, slicing toward the tapered end. This is done in a series of strokes, deepening the pocket as you go, but not cutting right through to the other side.

2. Smear a little mustard in each pocket, add a slice of cheese and close the pocket.

3. Place 2 sage leaves on each breast and wrap it with 1 or 2 rashers of bacon. This will keep the chicken moist. If you feel the need, secure the bacon with a toothpick.

4. The breasts are best cooked on a gas braai over a medium flame or indirect on a kettle braai for 10 minutes per side.

5. If you are unsure, prick one of them with a skewer or sharp knife and see that the juice runs clear. Let it rest before you serve or slice it, otherwise the cheese will run.

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EOA FOOD

BBQ PORK NECK STEAKS Ingredients

(Serves 8) § 8 to 10 pork neck steaks § 4 tbsp tomato sauce § 2 tbsp Worcestershire sauce § 2 tbsp olive oil § 2 tbsp soya sauce § 1 tbsp English mustard § 2 tsp crushed garlic § 1 tsp ground ginger § 1 tsp ground paprika

Method

1. Place the pork steaks in a bowl and add all the other ingredients and mix together to coat the steak well.

2. Marinate overnight, or for at least 3 hours.

3. Grill over a medium direct fire or grill for 7 to 10 minutes per side.

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TOMATO CHUTNEY MEALIES Ingredients

(Serves 6 to 8) § 500ml fresh tomatoes, peeled and chopped § 250ml brown sugar § 125ml raisins § 1 tsp ground ginger § 1 tsp salt § 1 cup apple cider vinegar § 1 tsp crushed garlic § 8 cobs sweetcorn § 230g tub cream cheese

Method

1. Combine all the chutney ingredients in a saucepan and bring to the boil, stirring until all the sugar has dissolved.

2. Reduce the heat to a gentle simmer and cook for an hour or until it reaches a consistency you are happy with.

3. For the sweetcorn, bring 2 litres of salted water to the boil in a large pot. Parboil the corn before grilling; this will ensure they don’t burn on the fire.

4. Leave the husks on the corn and boil for no more than 5 minutes.

5. Peel back the husks before braaing the mealies on a medium fire.

Turn them regularly to brown them evenly.

6. Top each mealie with a blob of cream cheese and a dollop of the tomato chutney before serving. You can also use store-bought chutney or sweet chilli sauce.

This chutney recipe is enough for mealies and some chops for a small gathering, but it doubles well and stores in the fridge for two weeks.

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EOA FOOD

BEETROOT WITH CUMIN YOGHURT Ingredients

(Serves 8) § 1 kg beetroot (2 bunches) § Salt and pepper § 5 tsp ground cumin § 250ml double cream Greek yoghurt § 2 tbsp honey § Sprouts

Method

1. Remove the greens and boil the beetroot whole for about an hour. Cool down the beetroot and peel the skin.

2. Cut the beetroot into roughly even chunks, place in a shallow bowl and season to taste.

3. Stir the cumin into the yoghurt and dollop it on top of the beetroot, then drizzle the honey over it.

4. Garnish with a pile of sprouts on top.

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FOOD & ENTERTAINING EOA

GRANADILLA LOLLIES Ingredients

(Makes 12 lollies) ยง 1 litre carton custard ยง 4 tins granadilla pulp 400ml granadilla yoghurt ยง 12 wooden teaspoons (available from R40 at In Good Company)

Method

1. Mix all the ingredients together in a jug, making sure they are well combined.

2. Pour the mixture out, dividing it evenly among the containers.

3. Pop a spoon in each, put them on a tray or something that will make it easy to get them in and out of the freezer.

4. Remember, the lollies need to go in the freezer overnight.

5. If you are a stickler for detail, check on them after 3 to 4 hours so you can straighten the spoon and it can freeze upright in the lolly. E

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Minister for Science & Technology, Naledi Pandor

Caitlin De Ville, electric violinist

WOMEN SCIENTISTS OF AFRICA RECOGNISED

Left to Right: Dr Peggy Oti-Boateng, Dr Oluwatoyin Adeleke, Sandeep Rai

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Back Left to Right: Mathapelo Makoba, Ruth Phahla Front Left to Right: Leah Legoai, Prelude Mogane

ESSAYS OF AFRICA

PICTURES: L’ORÉAL SA

Left to Right: Dr Peggy Oti-Boateng, Candice Rassie, Sandeep Rai (MD for L’Oréal SA)

SOCIAL SCENE EOA

Left to Right: Leyya Nihal, Bheki Hadebe, Paul Dimbaza, Jason Eason

African women have once again shown ingenuity and excellence when it comes to the sciences, with L’Oréal and UNESCO proudly announcing the winners of the 2014 L’OréalUNESCO for Women in Science Sub-Saharan Africa Regional Fellowships. The event took place at The Venue in Melrose, Johannesburg in November 2014. Five of the fellows were awarded a grant to further their doctoral studies, while the other five will continue their postdoctoral research with their grant. Essays Of Africa applaud L’Oréal for continuing their work in furthering the development of women scientist on the continent.

Professor Jill Farrant, professor of molecular and cell biology at UCT

PICTURES: L’ORÉAL SA

Left to Right: Dr Peggy Oti-Boateng, Irene Nsiah-Akoto, Sandeep Rai

Left to Right: Dr Peggy Oti-Boateng, Arwa Elaagip, Sandeep Rai

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Nuraan Motlekar (left) and Temitope Sogbanmu (right)

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Coastal TREASURE Understated elegance is at the heart of this luxury coastal home and specifically this living area. RHODA DAVIDS explains why its sumptuous decor works well and how you can recreate this look, whether you’re close to the ocean or not.

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DECOR STYLE FOCUS EOA OPEN AND AIRY

Glass and mirror complement this space and enhances the “inside outside” living space, which is ideal for summer entertaining. A glass stacking or sliding door allows you to open up the space for an uninterrupted view while the cladded mirror wall reflects natural light, which adds to the room’s airy feel. This sun-kissed room with its priceless view makes the most of natural light, giving the minimalistic decorated space some warmth.

MONOCHROME MAGIC

Who said a beach house has to be decorated in blue and white?

Create a luxe feel by going for a monochromatic colour palette.

The high impact of the contrasting black and white is truly timeless and stylish. The trick is to get the foundation of this look right with a white floor and white walls, and then only focus on texture. Here, the smoothness of the glass works well with the cladded mirror and its ripple effect as a focal wall. The plush rug and the smooth surfaced coffee tables increase the visual impact.

ON THE FABRIC FRONT

A spacious living room is something every homeowner covets.

The key to a large space is to create smaller “rooms” or spaces within the larger one. But remember to first identify what you want from the space. For example, in this room the homeowner created a sleek bar area in the one corner and a relaxation zone in the centre of the room. Because the view is the natural focal point, all furniture should be arranged in a way that does not detract from that or interrupt the flow from the inside outwards.

The use of a daybed instead of a sofa creates the perfect “me time” space where catching up on reading or soaking up the sun during an afternoon nap is ideal. The bar area in the corner is ideally placed to service both the indoor and outdoor spaces. The outdoor area forms the main entertaining area with additional sofas and larger coffee tables – perfect for sunset cocktails and canapés.

ACCESSORISE

PICTURES: ©ISTOCK.COM; SUPPLIED BY STOCKISTS.

Coastal accents in the form of décor accessories and soft furnishings are the ideal way to complete the look you want.

In this space accessories are kept to a minimum but still add a striking touch. Try pottery and ceramic pieces in the same colour as the furniture for visual harmony. A rug is a key piece as it not only assists to demarcate the areas in a large room but also anchors the space. Add faux fur throws to mix and match texture as well as an array of scatters for both in- and outdoors.

LIGHT IT UP

Even though this room is flooded with natural light, the right combination of lighting will, without doubt, brighten up any space which will make it more welcoming. By layering functional and decorative lighting to help eliminate any dark areas, it will also set the light and airy mood. Spotlights in the high ceiling connected to dimmer switches are ideal for this, while a larger standing lamp makes a style statement and adds to the overall luxurious feel. A decorative pendant light can be seen reflecting in the mirror wall.

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EOA DECOR STYLE

SILVER BOWL,

R650, Boardmans.

STRIPED RUG,

R2 995, Weylandts.

ROUND MIRROR,

R4 995, Weylandts.

ROUND TABLE, CERAMIC FISH,

R100 (large), R60 (small), both from Mr Price Home.

BAROQUE LAMP,

R1 295, Coricraft.

R6 495, Weylandts.

LUXE LIVING

Get ready for hot summer entertaining by giving your beach house a luxurious boost with a few fab furnishings.

CANDLE LANTERN, R215,

Love Home at Spree.co.za.

BLACK & WHITE CUSHION,

R160, Boardmans.

SANTORINI DAYBED,

R6 495, Coricraft.

FLORA END TABLES IN WHITE AND BLACK,

R1 999 each, Mobelli.

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exclusively available at

S A Y

1907 Dore ad Essense of Africa.indd 1

M O R E

Store U73, Sandton City, Sandton Drive, Tel +27 11 783 7316/7/8

Visit our online store at www.dorefashion.co.za

2014/10/21 6:04 PM

Fabric frontrunner

Hertex is now the exclusive distributor of James Malone textiles based in Malaga, Spain. The latest collection is rustic with a masculine touch that reflects the well-travelled, decisive man himself. There’s a strong English country influence blended with vibrant tones of Moorish Spain making this brand unique. For more info, visit Hertex.co.za.

All Things Pretty

RHODA DAVIDS gives you the 411 on the latest news and products in décor and design.

CLICK AND BUY

Now you can shop at Boardmans online. As one of South Africa’s oldest and trusted homeware brands, Boardmans now brings more choice to online shoppers with global sought-after brands, including Granny Goose, Jenna Clifford, Russell Hobbs and Jamie Oliver. The site is well designed and you can shop by room or brand. Thank U account holders will also be able to conveniently use their store credit facility to make payments. So if you’re looking for an extensive range of kitchen, bedroom and bathroom delights, visit Boardmans.co.za.

SUMMER IS LOOKING SO GOOD Outdoor furniture has gone up a notch in style with Mobelli’s Summer 2015 collection with pieces that will enhance your outdoor entertainment experience, while withstanding the South African climate by being comfortable and durable. From the streamlined fully upholstered Rivoli all-weather suite allowing water to drip through the open weave and dry out, to the standout Sirena sun lounger (left) that is ideal for any contemporary home, garden or pool area. For more info, visit Mobelli.co.za.

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DECOR NEWS EOA

NEW LOOK DESIGNINDABA.COM

Design Indaba is charting a new course as a fully fledged online media platform by recharging its digital presence with creativity, and content that is independent from its annual conference and expo.

Designindaba.com will showcase, analyse and probe developments and creativity from across the globe. Site visitors can look forward to original content, opinion pieces, designer profiles, a special focus on Africa with fortnightly reports on futuristic fashion designers from Dakar, architects from Luanda, film junkies in Rwanda and master carpenters from Sierra Leone. In addition, full talks from DI Conference going back to 2006 will also be available to access. Tweet @designindaba if you have any queries.

PICTURES: JAMES MALONE; JENNA CLIFFORD; ZHOOSH, TIIA ETTALA.

CREATIVES SWAP HOMES If you’re a professional designer or visual artist you could be swopping homes with other creative types from all over the world. Behomm is the first worldwide home exchange website specifically for creatives that was launched by graphic designers Agusti Juste and Eva Calduch, from Barcelona, who thought to create for themselves what they couldn't find online. “We are graphic designers and members of other home exchange sites. We realised that we always ended up exchanging with people working in areas similar to ours,” Juste explains. “That’s why we decided to launch Behomm, a community we built to satisfy what we were looking for.”

Membership is by invitation only and has an annual fee which grants unlimited access to as many home exchanges as members can manage in a year with no additional fees. To date they have signed up almost 1 000 members in over 40 countries. The filter for choosing a home is based on great taste rather than luxury, so you'll find everything from stunning villas with seaviews, to city loft apartments and simple forest cabins to choose from. For more info, visit Behomm.com. E

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BEACH

love

Summertime in Africa means languishing on loungers on beautiful beaches or alongside sultry lagoons and luscious lakes, while sipping on chilled drinks as you wait for the sunset of a day that promises never to end.

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TRAVEL EOA

S

ummer temperatures mean we’re all looking for relief from the heat. From the ice in your drink to the wave that drops you on the beach, water is fun and relaxing and – if you choose right – glamorous. Africa and the adjacent Indian Ocean are rich in beach destinations, so the trick is to find what suits your particular needs and taste.

WORDS: AFRICAN TRAVEL MARKET MAGAZINE. PICTURES: ©iSTOCK.COM ANANTARA BAZARUTO ISLAND RESORT AND SPA; RÉUNION TOURISM; ANDBEYOND;

Réunion

For a holiday with a European touch that’s only a five-hour flight from the coast of East Africa, head for Réunion, a neighbour of Mauritius. An overseas domain of France, it combines Gallic flair with a twist of Indian Ocean island creole culture. The vegetation may say island but the bakeries, bookshops, boutiques and banks are French to the core. A volcanic outcrop with steep cliffs, it offers excursions to majestic and extinct craters, enough adventure sports to tame the restless and the chance to sample French and island dishes.

Ocean-related sports include snorkelling, scuba diving, sea-kayaking and jet-skiing. Inland touring companies will take you to abseil, navigate natural water slides, hike through forests and canyons – and even up in a microlight for a bird’s-eye view of the island, which is highly recommended.

The Seychelles

The Seychelles islands north of Mauritius and Réunion are arrestingly beautiful and good enough for royalty – the fact that Prince William and his new bride Kate Middleton honeymooned there is a ringing endorsement. They offer world-class resorts with infinity pools overlooking neverending ocean vistas with choice sports activities on tap.

Self-catering houses and bungalows about, with beach buggies and bicycles for hire, offering the chance to head out and explore because you basically can’t get lost.

The beaches of the Seychelles islands are memorable and you’ll have to stop every 10 minutes for a swim and a stare – and an island cocktail or two. Popular islands are Mahé (the main island), La Digue and Praslin, but you could also try Alphonse Island or North Island for an adventure that offers the ultimate in pristine landscapes and barefoot luxury.

North Island is one of the Wilderness Safari offerings in the Seychelles, situated within the "inner islands".

There are 11 luxury villas to choose from with a gym, library, dive centre and pool, all built into a gigantic rocky outcrop. North Island is the ultimate Seychelles cliché – all turquoise ocean and powdery-white sand.

Mozambique

Mozambique is a blend of Portuguese and African flavours and is blessed with beaches and reefs that equal the best in the world. Seven hours north of the capital Maputo (by car) sits the town of Inhambane and clustered together along its coast are the beaches that draw most visitors – like the lovely Guinjata Bay, with an equipped PADI-certified diving centre.

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The nearby reefs (Manta reef for spotting rays) offer the most spectacular opportunities for diving and snorkelling.

Beach restaurants serve up platters of seafood complemented by traditional Portuguese bread and local beer; the beaches are sweeping and the water a clear turquoise. Ski-boats (for hire) depart and land with the tides. Tofo Beach is where the young crowd hangs out and Ponta Barra and Paindane are also popular.

Zavora Beach near the village of Inharrime is a great holiday spot for families and deep-sea fisherman. The islands off the coast of Mozambique, such as Bazaruto, offer dreamlike luxury retreats with unspoilt beaches and boats to take you where you please.

The Anantara Bazaruto Island Resort and Spa is a great option if barefoot luxury is your thing. There are 44 villas to choose from and superb facilities and activities on offer. The scuba diving is spectacular, and you might be lucky enough to spot whales, dugongs and turtles. A sundowner cruise on a dhow is the perfect ending to any day.

Comoros

The Comoros is an archipelago of four islands in the Indian Ocean situated halfway between the island of Madagascar and northern Mozambique. Of the four islands, Mayotte still belongs to France, while the others, Anjouan, Grande Comore and Moroni, opted for independence.

French, Arabic and the local dialect Shikomoro are widely spoken and visitors come here for its lost-in-time Arabic culture, beaches, underwater riches, rain forest scenery and hikes. While Anjouan is considered the most stunning visually, most of the hotels are on Grande Comore. For yesteryear charm, Moroni is the island to visit.

Zanzibar

This island is a truly exotic destination thanks to its tropical setting, spices, languid lagoons and engaging locals. Over the years, it has become a popular beach destination and big competition for Mauritius and Seychelles in terms of being family-friendly and offering value for money.

Pemba Island (the Green Island) is part of the Zanzibar Archipelago and lies 50km north of Unguja, the largest island in the group. It is known for its clove production, and together with Mafia Island and Unguja forms the Spice Islands. Pemba’s population is a mix of Arab and Swahili people who display all the beguiling colour, tradition and, customs of their heritage. The Manta Resort is a popular place to stay, where getting close to nature is part of the experience with spectacular diving sites.

Chake Chake is Pemba’s largest town and boasts a modest museum showcasing historic finds and maritime history.

Pemba is all about lazy exploration on a romantic single-sail dhow, beautiful beaches, clear lagoons, and hotels that display local craftsmanship – ornate Zanzibari doors are world famous.

Mnemba Island is a favourite honeymoon location and for good reason. Situated off the northeast coast of Zanzibar, there are just 10 "bandas" on the beach. While the theme is understated beach living, every comfort is on offer in truly magnificent surroundings that leaves travellers wanting more.

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'Zanzibar is a truly exotic destination thanks to its tropical setting, spices, languid lagoons and engaging locals.'

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TRAVEL EOA

Sidi Bou Said, Tunisia

A must-see North African destination that has drawn the creative and intellectual to its shores for decades is the medieval cliff-top town of Sidi Bou Said in Tunisia. Named for a religious figure, the village is famous for its external use of blue and white, which in the bright sunlight offer up a shimmering visual spectacle.

In the Arab tradition, it’s filled with narrow, winding paths leading to hidden courtyards, bougainvillea gardens and soothing water features.

It is a place where busyness fades, the soul can breathe, and artists and orange trees flourish.

To find the magic, explore the back streets where its authentic past still thrives. Be sure to visit the spectacular Dar Ennejma Ezzahra palace, the legacy of a French baron and a centre for Arab and Mediterranean music. Especially recommended is the Café Sidi Chabaane, which tumbles down a terraced cliff overlooking the magnificent bay. Only 20km from the capital, the blue-and-white village can be reached by a TGM train, which runs between Tunis and La Marsa.

In the evening and with the day-trippers gone, the real Sidi Bou Said emerges – so stay overnight to experience the hypnotic appeal of this one-of-a-kind village.

Red Sea, Egypt

Scuba divers the world over are enamoured of Egypt’s Red Sea area – an underwater paradise blessed with an inspiring variety of marine riches and vistas. The most popular destinations include Farun and Giftun Islands, Ras Mohamed National Park, Seven Pillars and the Straits of Tiran. Combining a visit to Egypt’s temples and pyramids with time underwater at the Red Sea would make for a dream holiday and there are large hotels that offer all the luxuries the heart desires.

Kenya

Kenya’s beautiful beaches – Diani, Malindi and Mombasa in the south – are justly famous and each attracts its own set of supporters. The island of Lamu is truly a place where time has stood still. Stay over at the famous Peponi Hotel or Kipungani Explorer, or hire the home of one of the locals with a huge balcony and a view of the entire island.

South Africa

We can’t, of course, write a story on Africa’s best beaches without mentioning those in Cape Town: Clifton (all four beaches), Llandudno, Hout Bay beach, Muizenberg and Boulders Beach. Durban’s lovely beaches deserve a mention as well, including the large family-friendly stretches of sand along the North Coast, which offers the ultimate in bucket-and-spade holidays. Further north, you’ll find wild beaches, such as those along the Elephant Coast, stretching all the way up to the Mozambican border. E

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w

hen Bongi Silinda did her first Idols audition at Carnival City in Johannesburg, the 24-year-old was turned away after performing her version of the Destiny’s Child hit Stand Up For Love. But determined to succeed, Bongi auditioned for a second time in Pretoria, performing Beyonce’s Halo. So moved were the judges that Unathi Msengana said to Bongi: “Beyoncé would bow down to you after this.”

Needless to say, she made it the second time round and didn’t for a second look back. Her grit and determination is astounding. As SA Idols judge Gareth Cliff put it: “There are two types of people who come back for a second time. There are those who are desperate and in denial, and then there are those who are so persistent because they believe they have the talent.” As Bongi proved time and again throughout the show, she is no doubt an embodiment of the latter.

“Growing up in Mpumulanga, I always knew I’d be famous. I would watch YoTV and think that some day it would be me up on the screen, performing in front of a big crowd,” says Bongi. Her passion for music and performing is infectious – spend a few minutes in this talented singer’s presence and you know she was destined for greatness.

Bongi’s talent paid off as she made it all the way to the finale of South African Idols season 10.

At the end it was between her and the equally talented Vincent Bones. Despite her widespread support and having the backing of her entire home province – even the local MEC for Culture, Sports and Recreation Sbongile Manana was in

Bongi Silindila, runner-up of the recent SA Idols music contest, stunned audiences with her great rendition of Brenda Fassie’s hit Too Late For Mama.

Destiny’s CHILD

the audience to support her at the grand finale – she eventually lost the title to Vincent. Yet in customary Bongi style, she accepted the loss with grace: “I don’t even see it as a loss. It was a blessing to be part of Idols and to have made it this far.”

HUMBLE BEGINNINGS

Growing up in the quiet township of Driekoppies, Bongi jokes that she came out of the womb singing. “My favourite toy was a keyboard; I started trying to play it from the age of one.” Born into a musical family, she had strong influences of soul music throughout her childhood. Undoubtedly her favourite musical idol is Anita Baker. “Sweet Love was the first song that I performed for people and it’s still my favourite.” As a youngster she sang at every opportunity she could get, including

Making it to the finals of this season’s Idols, BONGIWE SILINDA captured the hearts of many fans, wowing crowds including CARYN THANDI PETERSEN. JA NUA RY 2 0 1 5

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ENTERTAINMENT EOA IDOLS SONGSTRESS POWER NUMEROUS FAMOUS POP STARS, BOTH HERE AND ABROAD, MADE THEIR NAMES ON THE HIT REALITY MUSIC SHOW, IDOLS. HERE’S WHO WE LOVE...

JENNIFER HUDSON

Although J-Hud placed seventh in her season of American Idol, the 33-yearold artist has gone on to become one of the show’s biggest successes by being the only Idols contestant to win an Oscar for her performance in Dreamgirls – that’s in addition to her Golden Globe, Screen Actors Guild and Grammy awards!

ZAMAJOBE

PICTURES: M-NET; ©iSTOCK.COM.

Although she only made it as far as the Top 10, Zamajobe Sithole went on to have a successful career in the music industry, performing at festivals and concerts, and winning nominations and awards at the SAMAs and MTV Music Awards.

church and community gatherings.

Yet the path to musical stardom wasn’t always clear. Coming from hard-working backgrounds, with her father being a teacher and her mother a chef, Bongi’s parents had major misgivings about a career in music. “Of course they supported me all the way in Idols,” she says, but prior to her current success, they urged her to try teaching or medicine, something that could bring about a steady salary and security. But Bongi had other plans, and soon after graduating from high school she enrolled at the Howard Campus of the University of KwaZulu-Natal where she completed a diploma in jazz and popular music.

Bongi’s professional career was launched when she became a back-up singer for the legendary Vusi Mahlasela, Swazi Dlamini and Tshepo Mngoma.

Although she dreamt of being more than “the girl at the back”, Bongi is hugely appreciative of

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working with these great South African artists.

Bongi says she learnt more about the industry from performing with Vusi than anywhere else: “He taught me to remain humble and believe in myself, no matter what. It was the greatest privilege to sing for Vusi, and that gave me the confidence to keep auditioning for Idols.”

It’s clear that the road to greater success has just begun for Bongi, who mesmerised audiences with her powerful voice, whether channelling the late great Brenda Fassie or Amy Winehouse. Her new single, If I Got You, is already available on iTunes. She describes her musical style as “neosoul with an African twist”, and hopes to emulate the sounds of Afrotraction by introducing vernacular in her songs too: “I aspire to be like Afrotraction, because he sings in Swati.”

Watch this space South Africa. Bongi’s days of charming fans are far from over yet. E

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FUNNY MAN

CARYN THANDI PETERSEN rounds up this month’s hottest releases on the movie and theatre circuits, with Marc Lottering’s new show as the star outing this January.

This Is Captain Lottering Speaking

Fresh from a successful run in Joburg, Marc Lottering brings his witty comedy back to the Mother City in his new one-man show. All the usual suspects are back: Auntie Merle Abrahams, Smiley, Galatia Geduldt, Travis and Colleen, the cashier from hell. This time, everyone’s going to the airport, so fasten your seatbelt for a night of side-splitting adventures.

This Is Captain Lottering Speaking runs at the Baxter Concert Hall until 17 January.

During the winter of 1952, British authorities entered the home of mathematician, cryptanalyst and war hero Alan Turin to investigate a reported burglary. They instead ended up arresting Turin himself on charges of “gross indecency”, an accusation that led to his devastating conviction for the criminal offence of homosexuality. Benedict Cumberbatch gives an intense portrayal of this brilliant and complicated man in a deeply haunting film. The Imitation Game opens on 23 January at Ster Kinekor theatres.

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PICTURES: STER-KINEKOR; MARC LOTTERING.

THE IMITATION GAME

MOVIES & THEATRE EOA

FOXCATCHER

Based on true events, Foxcatcher tells the dark and fascinating story of the unlikely and ultimately tragic relationship between an eccentric multi-millionaire, played by Steve Carell, and two champion wrestlers.

Channing Tatum takes the lead as an Olympic gold medal winning wrestler who is lured into the murky world of his wealthy benefactor, alongside Mark Ruffalo as his revered older brother. This film of brotherly love and the emotional bankruptcy that can accompany great power and wealth is not to be missed. Foxcatcher opens on 1 January at Ster Kinekor cinemas nationwide.

Orpheus in Africa

David Kramer’s brand new musical promises to be a feast for the senses, with the very talented Aubrey Pooe at the helm. It tells the little known story of the McAdoo Virginia Jubilee Singers’ visit to South Africa during the last decade of the 19th century. Many well-known jubilee spirituals, such as Roll Jordan Roll, Swing Low Sweet Chariot and The Gospel Train, will be featured as well as a number of new compositions by Kramer.

Orpheus In Africa premieres on 28 January at The Fugard Theatre in Cape Town.

ANNIE

Academy Award nominee Quvenzhane Wallis stars as Annie, a happy foster child who’s also tough enough to make her way on New York’s streets in 2014. It’s been a hard-knock life with her mean foster mom Miss Hannigan, wickedly played by Cameron Diaz, but everything changes when Jamie Foxx steps into the picture as a hard-nosed tycoon and mayoral candidate who is eager to win support as her guardian angel.

Annie opens 30 January at Ster Kinekor cinemas nationwide. E

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EOA TECH NEWS + APPS Audi has undergone intensive development work with Google and Apple so we’ll soon be able to use all the functions available on smartphones via the operating system in cars too. Google Android Auto and Apple CarPlay software platforms will be integrated into their Multi Media Interface for new models starting in 2015. Given we spend so much time behind the wheel, let’s hope other manufacturers will soon follow suit.

AUDI CONNECT WITH APPLE AND ANDROID

OUT OF MILK

Grocery shopping becomes a breeze with this must-have app, providing you with intuitive shopping and pantry lists that can be as simple or detailed as you like. You can even sync and share the lists with your partner, family or flat mates, ensuring you’ll never be out of milk (or toilet paper) again. Thank goodness!

GPS LOG BOOK

Anyone who needs to be compensated for travel costs knows how arduous the task can be to keep records. Luckily, mileage tracking apps and products are at hand to simplify the process. The small and hasslefree GPS Log Book simply plugs into the cigarette lighter of your car and records every trip you make. With minimal effort or time, you can generate business travel claim reports, keep track of monthly travel expenses and provide an accurate SARS-compliant logbook at the end of each month. Easy as a Sunday morning, or a trip down the road! E

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WORDS: CARYN THANDI PETERSEN. PICTURES: SUPPLIED BY FEATURED APPS.

GREEN FINGERS

Gardening enthusiasts, including novice gardeners, can look forward to a host of new technology to up their gardening game. One such tool is the Parrot Flower Power, designed to measure the parameters that facilitate the growth of plants, such as sunlight, humidity, temperature and fertiliser.

This info is transferred via Bluetooth to the Cloud, analysed by dedicated software and sent back to your smartphone or tablet. Happy gardening!

BE INSPIRED

BOOKS EOA

The simplest of quotes can spur you into action, and this book does just that, writes Robyn Bloch.

Lillian Barnard’s book of inspiring quotes, I Hope You Feel Inspired (Amazon.com, R90), is a true reflection of the rolemodel she is. “The right quote at the right time has the ability to spur you into action, help you change direction, or simply affirm what you already know,” says Lillian, founder and owner of LillianB Consulting Services based in Johannesburg.

For the past 15 years, Lillian has held positions in the IT Industry, and she’s travelled around the world, living in Paris and Switzerland for seven years with her son, Caleb.

But three years ago she decided to start a business based on her major passion: the empowerment and advancement of women. She began to work as an inspirational speaker and is now a sought-after advisor to business leaders and a patron of the DreamGirls International Outreach and Mentoring Programme of South Africa.

PICTURES: LILLIAN BARNARD; UMUZI, CHATTO & WINDUS.

The Reactive

by Masande Ntshanga

(Umuzi, R180) Masande Ntshanga is a fresh voice who recently won the PEN International New Voices award. This is a compelling book that follows Lindanathi, a man stuck between Cape Town, where he sells illegal pharmaceuticals, and his family. He is haunted by his brother’s death and faced with a decision: go home and face the past, or erase the past with more drugs.

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The Narrow Road North by Richard Flanagan (Chatto &Windus, R295) Richard Flanagan won the 2014 Man Booker Prize for Fiction for The Narrow Road To The Deep North – and for good reason. It follows the life of one man, who prospers amid war and death only to find, later, how much he has actually lost. This epic novel about the unravelling of the truth has been hailed as a haunting masterpice of the cost of war.

Tales of the Metric System by Imraan Coovadia (Umuzi, R250) This book is made up of 10 vignettes, which each comprise one day in the life of a character – from Ann, who is trying to protect her family in 1970, and Victor, whose search for a document in 1973 will change his life forever, to guitarist Yash, who takes his boy in 1979 to meet is revolutionary cousin.

A gratifying dip into South Africa’s modern history.

Captivated By You

by Sylvia Day (Penguin, R170) It’s here! The fourth instalment of Sylvia Day’s unstoppable Crossfire series has landed on shelves – and it’s hotter than ever. Expect more twists and turns in the epic journey of love between Gideon Cross and Eva Tramell in which the two will be faced with a terrible choice: the familiar safety of the lives they’d had before each other or the fight for a future that seems impossible and hopeless. E

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During my varsity years in Cape Town, I was lucky to be studying in the trendiest part of town, with the buzzing Kloof and Long Streets just a block away. Bars and restaurants crowded the area, becoming our research spots – not quite the wisest of choice perhaps – but they certainly got the creative juices flowing.

There was one restaurant that was a favourite – not so much for the food but more for its charming owner, who always welcomed us with warmth and a hilarious anecdote of his crazy Italian family. Whenever I passed by, he would shout out, “Ciao Bella!”

Since leaving the city, I have missed this daily greeting and the passion and exuberance that can only come from an Italian. Up until now, that is, for I recently had a taste of it again whilst driving the new Alfa Romeo 4C. Distinguished by unmistakable Italian style, this sophisticated car instantly transports one to a bustling Italian city. The lightweight coupe

has been designed to provide total driving pleasure. Sitting in its sexy racing bucket seats, you’ll wanna experience every thrill this baby has to offer. Its sports-car soul creates unique driving sensations, racing from 0 to 100km/h in just 4.5 seconds flat and reaching a top speed of 258km/h.

Designed with lightness and efficiency, the agile 4C is a blend of technology and beauty.

Sinuous and enveloping, every surface has been treated as sculpture, with classic Italian styling permeating every detail of the design.

The cockpit takes you to the helm of a racing car, yet is abundantly comfortable for everyday driving. What’s more, its 6-speed gearbox with dual dry clutch offers a solution that combines the instant power of a sequential shift with all the convenience of an automatic.

Don’t let its compact size fool you – this is one beast of a car! For those brave enough to enter its realm, you won’t be disappointed.

Italian stallion

PICTURES: QUICKPIC.CO.ZA.

The new Alfa Romeo is a driving machine without compromise that harnesses the passion and style of Italy on four wheels, writes CARYN THANDI PETERSEN.

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MOTORING EOA

A defender for Africa Land Rover’s most iconic model has become even more appropriate for the great outdoors: enter the Defender Africa Edition. Expect to see the distinctive Firenze Red roof of the new Defender in the most inaccessible of places, given its ability to cross the toughest terrain with ease. The Africa Edition builds on the legend that is Land Rover’s Defender, rolling nearly 70 years of hardcore 4x4 driving capability into one unmistakable package. As befits a limited edition of this nature, it only comes in black – Santorini Black that is – to set off the red roof and colour-coded wheel arches. If you’ve got money to spare and a spirit of adventure to go with it, this baby’s got your name on it.

PICTURES: QUICKPIC.CO.ZA.

SUBARU SYNONYMOUS WITH SAFETY

The all-new Subaru Legacy (left) and Subaru Outback are winners of the coveted Top Safety Pick Awards for 2014. Both models achieved the highest possible ratings in the crashworthiness evaluations as well as crash-avoidance testing.

Now the wait begins for the 2015 Subaru Outback to hit our shores. E

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EOA MUSIC

Making Mali Melodies

ASCENSION

BY TOYA DELAZY

TOUGH LOVE

BY JESSIE WARE

JOHNNY APPLE

BY JOHNNY APPLE

A year after walking away with three South African Music Awards for her gold-selling debut Due Drop – not to mention a BET nomination for Best International Act – Toya Delazy is back with a brand new album. Packed with big bass drops and a fresh fusion of sounds that Toya calls J.E.H.P (Jazz Electro Hip Hop), Ascension will keep you grooving all summer long.

Jessie entered the female pop scene in 2012 as a breath of fresh air with her delicately soulful debut Devotion, which became one of the most critically acclaimed albums of the year. The stunning vocals of this Brit sensation are brought to the fore on her new album, with bolder choruses and lush arrangements signifying her growth in confidence as a solo artist.

South Africa’s breakout star of 2014 and SA’s Got Talent 2013 winner, Johnny Apple has released his selftitled debut album that showcases the young singer’s talents in a range of deep and soulful tracks. At just 17, this young muso is going places, so we suggest you keep your eye on him and your collection stocked with his amazing offerings.

(SonyMusic)

(Universal Music)

(SonyMusic)

CELEBRATING 20 YEARS OF KALAWA JAZMEE (Universal Music)

Many agree that without Kalawa Jazmee, there would be no Kwaito.

Instrumental in the development and rise of this musical genre in South Africa, the record label’s first signing was Boom Shaka in the early 1990s. This Kalawa compilation comprises 20 of their biggest hits to date, with iconic tracks from the likes of Mafikizolo, Bongo Maffin, Oskido and more. E

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WORDS: CARYN THANDI PETERSEN. PICTURES: CC BY.SA-3.0; UNIVERSAL MUSIC; SONY MUSIC

South African fans of Vieux Farka Touré, son of the great Grammy Award-winning Ali Farka Touré, were reminded earlier this year why they love the “Hendrix of the Sahara” when he played his headlining set at the Cape Town World Music Festival. Performing to a packed audience in the City Hall, Vieux mesmerised with his blend of Malian music and blues. His music is equally prone to still and silent musings as it is to electrifying solos and cacophonous climaxes, and that’s why it appeals to so many across the continent.

Vieux has released four studio albums to date with the most recent Mon Pays released in May last year. With every passing year he continues to grow his father’s substantial legacy, and in the process builds his own musical reputation as a master of his craft, and product of Mali’s musical history.

Capricorn celeb

HOROSCOPES EOA

JOHN LEGEND BORN: 28 December 1978 AGE: 37

WORDS: STELLA NOVA. PICTURE: BAND SHOWBIZ.

Capricorns build dynasties with accomplishments that live on in people’s memories, so singer/ songwriter John Roger Stephens got it just right when he changed his name to John Legend in the early part of his career. John started producing his own music after university, and it paid off in 2001 when he was hired to work with Kanye West, and soon afterwards signed to a record label.

At age 37, he’s won nine Grammy awards. In his personal astrological chart, John has Saturn in Virgo, making him a musical craftsman. He is currently celebrating his Jupiter return, a once-in-adecade event that hugely magnifies success. Capricorns like to take their time with romance, too.

John and his wife, model Chrissy Teigen, married in 2013 after eight years together and a two-year engagement. The year 2015 sees things getting even better for John and all other Capricorns, whose love, power and money-making mojos are at a ten-year high. From August there’s lots of blue-sky thinking but with feet firmly planted on the ground. For John and Capricorns everywhere, it’s a great year ahead. Bring it on!

CAPRICORN 23 December – 20 January Happy birthday Capricorn! You’re a work in progress as powerful Pluto slowly transforms you from regular person to veritable enigma. More prepared to put faith in risky ideas, you’re quite the passion magnet now too. Set your mind to big achievements, as this year your vision and precision can make things happen.

Love: Someone who shares your values could make your heart leap.

They may need some persuasion, so coax them with spontaneous diversions and soft words.

Career: Everyone knows you’re a safe pair of hands, but quirky ideas could get you noticed at work now.

Money: It’s time to earn and save rather than go lavish. Collaborations with a friend or lover could help boost your income this month.

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ARIES 21 March – 20 April Love: Put the friendship back into long-term love or, if solo, find a friend who could become a lover but keep it under wraps till you’re both sure.

Career: Home life may have to wait as work needs you more now. Take the lead but be prepared to listen to others’ ideas and change tack if necessary.

Money: Plough your dough into making a wish come true. You’re the best investment you’ve got so don’t just dream it, do it.

TAURUS 21 April – 21 May Love: A work connection could become a love connection, but be certain before you head down that route. Becoming BFFs first shows whether this link has staying power.

Career: Prepare for change, but be patient. Something new emerges on the work front now but needs tweaking before things all go to plan.

Money: Spend wisely and check balances and receipts, as there may be some mind-bending money mix-ups around this month.

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EOA HOROSCOPES GEMINI 22 May – 21 June Love: Your love life is like a crazy romcom, with the chance for new love, a romantic trip, or the return of an ex. You’ve got it all going on so keep your wits about you.

Career: You’re immersed in your job again after recent doubts, but remember to come up for air. There is life outside of work.

Money: Recent excesses might have drained your resources. Keep your social scene local to allow your finances to recover.

CANCER 22 June – 23 July Love: Passion rules your world now, but deep down you know you want more than lust.

Rethink your romantic strategy.

Career: Work is a) unpredictable, b) challenging, c) exciting, or d) all of the above.

Option d, is the correct answer. It’s all good if you can learn to love the unexpected.

Money: Tempted to “comfort spend”? If you must indulge, invest in a gym pass to burn energy and raise endorphins rather than burn cash and raise debts.

LEO 24 July – 23 August Love: Crazy in love? You could be now as relationships mess with your mind as well as your heart. Enjoy the romance but think twice before over-committing.

Career: Working well with others is the way ahead for your career. Remember, you don’t always have to be the star of the show.

Money: Be aware of what you’ve got and where it’s going. It’s easy to get lost in a financial fantasy now if you just go with the flow, so keep it real.

VIRGO 24 August – 23 September Love: Loving yourself is important now so get into shape, emotionally and physically.

Then you’ll be right on for romance when it shows up later this month.

Career: With lots going on and revised routines to adjust to, there could be muddles ahead. Allow extra time for everything and you’ll sail through it all.

Money: New ways of organising your money could surface. It may mean a step back to move forward but you’ll be glad you did it.

LIBRA 24 September – 23 October Love: It’s a great month for love. The only glitch could be your indecisiveness. Should you or shouldn’t you? By next month you’ll know.

Career: Your career needs a reboot, a break or a change. Creative thinking helps you out of a rut and into your dream role, which could be working for yourself.

Money: It’s time to transform your relationship with money. Your deep-rooted beliefs are changing to give you more financial independence.

SCORPIO 24 October – 22 November Love: Feel the love at home, or close to home, this month. It’s new, it’s unexpected and you’ll make it jump through hoops until you’re satisfied it’s genuine. (By the way, it is.)

Career: Things may seem more laid back with work now. Use that down-time to revisit past contacts and review future career paths.

Money: If you’re planning a major purchase, do your research now to get the best you can. But, if possible, delay spending big until next month.

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SAGITTARIUS 23 November – 22 December Love: You’re saying all the right things now, and a less full-on approach than usual could bring you amazing romantic results.

Career: Gravitas is a good thing.

It means you can pitch even crazysounding suggestions at work and they’ll be taken as seriously as you intended them to be.

Money: Your new, more grounded take on life extends to your finances too, though avoid equating what you have with being a reflection of who you are.

AQUARIUS 21 January – 19 February Love: You have tremendous scope and hope for love that lasts. So what’s holding you back? Independence versus co-dependence? Think it over.

Career: You’re the ideal team player, but show your leadership skills now and take the lead on a project that suits your unique style.

Money: A perfect balance between earning and spending is achievable this month. Improve your money karma with a charitable gift, as what goes around comes around.

PISCES 20 February – 20 March Love: Bide your time when it comes to romance this month. Sow the seeds of love now and then wait and see, as next month is when things really start to blossom.

Career: Work is full-on and nononsense, but stimulating and rewarding too. The more you put in now, the more you’ll get out.

Money: There’s a chance for unexpected gains if you combine being dynamic, assertive and go-getting with being rational, professional and productive. E

ESSAYS OF AFRICA

STOCKISTS

WORDS AND PICTURES: EOA TEAM

STOCKISTS EOA

AFRICAN FASHION HOUSE 072 027 3607 ALDO 011 884 4141 BOARDMANS Boardmans.co.za BRONX Bronxwoman.com BULOVA Bulova.com CALL IT SPRING 011 784 1597 CANDY & CO. 011 781 3611 CASTELO 011 883 8767 CITY CHIC 011 783 9319 CLICKS 0860 254 257 CORICRAFT 011 611 8700 / Coricraft.co.za DIANE Diana@fashionbydiane.com DIS-CHEM 086 0347 243 DONNA CLAIRE 011 784 2174 DOT DASH 042 200 2600 EDGARS 0800 203 925 FABIANI 011 783 0066 FOREVER NEW 011 883 4585 FOSCHINI 021 938 1911 GELIDELI FASHION 078 762 8209 HUGO BOSS 011 884 1437 KAIKA JEWELLERY Kaikajewellery.com KAREN MILLEN 011 784 2937 LEBOMASH 082 969 5874 / Lebomashile23@gmail.com Mango 011 783 7907 Missibaba 011 880 2099 Mobelli 021 512 2662 / Mobelli.co.za Morule African Spa 081 375 5981 Mr Price Home 0800 212 535 / Mrphome.com Neema Collections 082 771 6922 POLO 011 883 6126 POSH 072 291 6819 SPREE Spree.co.za STUTTAFORDS 011 879 1000 TED BAKER 011 450 1156 TRUWORTHS 021 460 2300 VON ZIPPER 042 200 2600 WEYLANDTS 021 914 1433 / Weylandts.co.za WOOLWORTHS 0860 022 002 ORDINARY SKINCARE Ordinaryskincare.co.za ZANDO Zando.co.za ZARA 011 302 1500 ZURI 011 883 0918

EOA THE LAST WORD

WHO NEEDS THEM?

H

appy New Year! So what’s your resolution for 2015? That’s the inevitable conversation hook and question at any house party on New Year’s eve or that 1 Jan celebratory braai. I have enough pressure in my life, thank you, and I don’t need an unfulfilled resolution giving me the stink eye when the year draws to a close. So no, I have no resolutions and I’m not making any.

In fact, I only encountered this New Year’s resolution “tradition” in university. I wondered if it made people feel like they weren’t worthy of a new year without one. Or whether it made getting what you want easier because you have now thrown it out into the universe as a little emotional blackmail.

To this day I have never realised any of my resolutions, because I always forgot about them or life intervened. One year my resolution was to lose weight, at least two dress sizes, but instead I fell pregnant and gained two dress sizes. I had to park the resolution, and it is still sitting somewhere deep in the archives of postponed resolutions.

Another year I made the resolution to learn to control my temper, yet I got into a physical fight with a guy who touched my bum in a club, and a few weeks later I had a heated exchange with a taxi driver. Let’s face it, new year’s resolutions are the ugly stepchildren of goals that nobody takes seriously.

I tire of people who get so gung-ho about resolutions, yet they fail to plan their lives beyond their resolutions. No mini goals to lead them to their big resolution. Just a resolution, and then the resolution must resolve itself.

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For example, you plan to make three times your salary in the new year, but you are doing exactly the same things that make you earn a third of what you can. Come on, if you’re going to make a resolution then you must commit, especially if you are going to annoy me about it through slurred syllables and shouting a little too loudly in my ear.

If you have to make one, why not pick something you know you are guaranteed to complete. Like say you want to own a house, because your bond just got approved (yeah!). Or you want to propose to your lady, because you have already made the first lobola payment. Or you’re going to lose more weight, because you've been banting and seeing results. Make a resolution a set up for celebration; not something that makes you wish you'd asked the year for an extension.

I have noticed, mind you, that every year is like walking into a new grade with a brand new teacher. You never know how mean or accommodating they will be. For me, 2014 was that mean teacher who, the more you asked her to slow down, the more she hit the accelerator and moved at dizzying speeds – a steep learning curve but one that I'll be forever grateful for. E

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