Sep-Oct 2013 Hi Class Living Magazine by Hi Class Living Magazine

BERGEN COUNTY

SEPTEMBEr - October 2013

Serving Bergen County for over 29 Years

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Gracious FORT LEE Colonial

Timeless, North Cliffs Ctr Hall colonial with 6 Brms, 7.5 Bths, 2 story foyer, great room w/granite fpl, oversized eat in kitchen, butler’s pantry, Master suite w/fpl, designer bath w/Jacuzzi, stone, walk in closets, custom vanities. Lower level w/wet bar, Bdrm, Bth, wine cellar, entertainment area.

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Riverfront, luxurious 2 and 3 bedroom townhouses in Edgewater, 1,680 to 2,700 SF. Access to major arteries, minutes to Manhattan via bridge, ferry or tunnel. Hardwood floors, cove lighting, custom kitchens and baths. From $715,000.

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September - October 2013

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One of the Most Respected Names in Northern New Jersey Haworth Elegant and grand custom built Center Hall Colonial set high on a 150 X 150 corner lot. The understated exterior is finished with cedar and hand cut stone, a four car garage and a circular driveway. The interior boasts a front to back entrance foyer with architectural details and a sweeping stairway, large rooms with high quality finishes, a Salerno gourmet kitchen, four masonry fireplaces, 10’ ceilings throughout the first level, 9’ ceilings on the second level and many additional amenities. The second floor consists of six bedrooms and four bathrooms, including a magnificent master bedroom suite. The basement is finished with a summer kitchen, recreation room with a fireplace, two bedrooms, a full bathroom, and an outside exit. Excellent school system!

Englewood Cliffs – North Under Construction and almost complete. Brick Center Hall Colonial home on a quiet street in the sought after Roberts Road area of Englewood Cliffs. This 8,000+ SF home offers high quality finishes and meticulous attention to detail including extensive woodwork, radiant heat, custom cabinetry, high end appliances, lavish use of marble and onyx plus a backup generator. Large rooms throughout with five bedrooms on the second level and a bedroom suite on the main floor. The finished basement can still be customized to meet all of your needs. An elegant residence in the finest location!

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40 Years of Real Estate Excellence

Hi Class Living

Contents Features 12 Bad Habits That Hurt Client Relationships And How To Fix Them 16 Recognize And Prevent Cyberbullying Lifestyles 20 Lifestyle Buzz

22 Happily Unmarried. What Are The Financial Issues? 26 Teaching Kids To Be Organized Fashion 28 Fall Fashion Musts 30 Jazz Up Your Wardrobe 32 Packing It In

36 Fall Fashion

On the cover Candy Girl Acrylic on Panel 42” X 32” by Anja Van Herle Available at JoAnne Artman Gallery 326 N. Coast Highway Laguna Beach, Ca. 92651 949.510.5481 www.joanneartmangallery.com September - October 2013

NJ T: 201.266.8555 NY T: 212.888.6250

M: 201.906.6024 M: 917.576.0776

Jeffrey Schleider

Ruth Miron-Schleider

Broker/Owner Miron Properties NY

Broker/Owner Miron Properties NJ

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Diane Von Furstenberg • Stella McCartney • M Missoni • Red Valentino • Minnie Rose • Flavio Castellani • A.L.C. • Kimberly Ovitz • Haute Hippe •

Feel The Piece • Jimmy Choo • Christian Louboutin • Charlotte Olympia • Saint Laurent • Giuse

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• Halston Heritage • Torn by Ronny Kobo • Autumn Cashmere • Alice & Olivia • J Brand • Brian At

September - October 2013

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No wonder many call Red Bank “Soho by the shore.” A shopping and dining destination with a blend of diverse retailers – including chain-style businesses – and independent boutiques and restaurants not found anywhere else. From casual burger joints to excellent dining in places like Blue Water Seafood, and Red Bank’s newset hotspot, Char Steakhouse. Valet parking is availble evry night on Broad Street from 5pm to 12 am. It’s worth driving hours to visit and experience an authentic downtown, make Red Bank your destination any time of the year.

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Hi Class Living

Decor 44 Before You Say â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;I Doâ&#x20AC;? To Furniture 48 New Tile Trends 52 Integrating TVs Into Your Decor 56 Home Makeovers

59 Home Decor HEalth & Fitness 60 Animal Contact Yields Better Health, Less Stress

64 Causes And Cures Of Skin Cancer Travel 66 The Lodge At Woodloch A Destination Spa Resort 70 Ocean Place Resort And Spa Departments 73 News And Openings 74 NYC ... Plus 76 Dining At Its Best

September - October 2013

utting a face to a name is important to Bank of New Jersey. Every client should know who they can reach out to for assistance with their financial needs. New Jersey businesses will find a family of local bankers at Bank of New Jersey who understand local business, economies and trends. Business Development Officers like Alejandra Pazmino, have the full authority and lending strength of the bank behind them - never having to go far to make a decision.

Alejandra Pazmino, VP APazmino@BONJ.net

Expertise and professionalism delivered with a smile. That’s what you can expect from BONJ!

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Bank of New Jersey It’s all about relationships.

Member FDIC • www.bonj.net • NYSE: Amex Stock Symbol: BKJ • Equal Housing Lender

Equal Opportunity Lender

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Hi Class Living

Shopping for a Jumbo Mortgage? Now is the time!

Hi Class Living is published six times a year and is mailed exclusively to affluent residents in select Bergen County neighborhoods.

• Purchase and refinance transactions • Primary and secondary homes • A banking team that understands your marketplace

Publishers Nava and Michael Raviv

Contact Tom Cosentino at 201-816-8900 to learn about our competitive rates and flexible terms. All loans subject to credit approval and programs may change at any time.

Editor in Chief Nava Raviv

Connect with us ConnectOneBank.com or give us a call at 201-816-8900

Intern Marie Angelique Dimacali Contributors: Dottie DeHart, Carrie Schwab-Pomerantz, Sarah Welch, Alicia Rockmore, Sharon Mosley, Mary Carol Garrity, Paatricia Sheridan, Michelle Jennings Wiebe, Candice Olsen, Dr. David Lipschitz, Chuck Norris, Jane Rubin, Marius Rubin, Guy Raviv, Scripps Howard News.

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or e-mail: info@hiclass.com MNR Promotions, Inc. Hi Class Living Magazine 120 Sylvan Avenue, Suite 209 Englewood Cliffs, NJ 07632

Matthew B. Libien CFP®

Financial Advisor – Certified Financial Planner® 461 From Road – Mack VI Paramus, NJ 07652

No information in Hi Class Living is to be taken or construed as legal, medical, health or any other kind of advice. Information is published only for general reading pleasure. We are not responsible for typographical or artist’s errors. ©2013.

201–225–6047 • 800-922-0501 Matthew.b.libien@wfadvisors.com

September - October 2013

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Hi Class Living

Bad Habits That Hurt Client Relationships And How To Fix Them

Dottie DeHart

f you’re like most business owners, you probably assume your client relationships are pretty good. After all, you have enough clients to still be in business. But it’s possible you’re merely surviving instead of thriving.

“Most business owners are so concerned with paying the bills that they instinctively put themselves first. It’s a behavior fueled by fear. But when they really put the customer first, and put their own needs second, a whole lot of other things naturally fall into place. Decisions will become easier, and the business will flourish,”says Joseph Callaway, the author of the new book Clients First: The Two Word Miracle. Callaway shares ten bad habits that might be keeping you from putting clients first — and tactics to help you start sweeping these habits out: Making client interactions about you Having a healthy ego can be a blessing and a curse. Yes, you need a strong sense of self in order to avoid being taken advantage of and marginalized by September - October 2013

Hi Class Living

competitors and by clients. But when you start to believe that winning, recognition, and accolades are “the point” of what you do, you’ve veered off onto a destructive path. You become less likely to put the client’s best interests first if they interfere with reaching your own goals or with how others might see you. And while you may believe it’ll never happen to you, this is also the path that leads to moral ambiguity, cheating, and trampling others in the name of success. “Plus, no client likes working with someone who has a patronizing attitude or constantly sings his own praises,” points out Callaway. “That’s why it’s crucial for you to redirect your ego and get out of your own way. Remember, your job is to be a champion for your clients, to solve their problems and find them satisfying solutions. Your job is not to be the most important person in the room or to put others down. When you take care of your clients first, they will take care of you through their loyalty and appreciation.” TACTIC: Notice how often you bring the story around to yourself. Stop doing that. Many people think building rapport is a matter of finding a common interest. They then dominate the common interest discussion by talking about themselves. Don’t. This is a form of arrogance and it takes your focus off the client. Worrying too much If you’re like most people, you probably feel burdened with a myriad of worries, fears, and obligations. You assume that “it’s all up to me,” and you might even lie awake at night fretting over what isn’t right and what could go wrong. However, if you want to successfully care for your clients, you can’t expend the majority of your mental energy on worries and whatifs. This puts you in the wrong frame of mind to think innovatively about how to meet customers’ needs. And when taken to extremes, worries can effectively paralyze you and prevent you from moving forward at all. “It’s challenging to break what’s often September - October 2013

a lifetime’s worth of mental habits,” Callaway clarifies. “But here’s the beauty of Clients First: Success is no longer about you; it’s about your customers. Your challenge is only to do the best for your clients. It’s a win-win situation, because the clients put their faith in you and you put your faith in doing your best for them. In our experience, everything else usually works out for the best.” TACTIC: Every time you find yourself fretting, do something for a client. Spend an hour solving a client problem you’ve been avoiding. Connect one client to another who might be able to help him. Email him a link to an article you know would interest him. Worry thrives when you procrastinate and hand-wring. Action is the antidote…so do something (anything) to back up your commitment to your clients. Letting apathy creep in In the real world, and especially in a tough economy, you can’t always “do what you love.” Unfortunately, that reality often leads to apathy, disengagement, and an “I just have to make it till five o’clock” mentality. If that describes you, it’s time for a wake-up call: You can’t coast through each workday and give 100 percent in service to your clients at the same time. That’s why, regardless of how you spend your nine-tofive hours, it’s imperative that you choose to take pride in your work. “When you consciously decide to put forth your best efforts, you’ll experience greater rewards, you’ll get better at what you do, and apathy will disappear as you begin to genuinely care about doing the job right for your clients,” Callaway promises. “Whether you are a CEO or installing brake pads, you can learn to love what you do in that you feel pride in your work and strive to be better. Having any other attitude will only make you miserable and drive clients away.” TACTIC: Make plans to do something this year that will help you get better at your job. Maybe it’s going to a seminar. Maybe it’s asking the client how you 35

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Hi Class Living

Recognize Cyber

he rapidly expanding digital landscape has allowed bullying to spread beyond playgrounds and school hallways to computer screens, smartphones, and more.

“Since this is a pressing issue that can affect any family, it’s crucial for parents to be able to recognize the signs that their children may be cyberbullies, and to know how to handle and prevent this behavior,” says Amy Lupold Bair, author of Raising Digital Families For Dummies. Tweens and teens (and in some instances, even younger kids) who are engaged in cyberbullying often exhibit behavior changes, just as victims do. Watch for the following signs: • Your child may stop using the computer when you come into the room or quickly change screens or tabs. • Your child may sharply increase time spent on the computer or on a smartphone. • Your child may appear stressed or secretive when using these devices, and September - October 2013

And Prevent bullying

Dottie DeHart

Hi Class Living

may become anxious, upset, or excessively angry when you limit or take away access. • Your child may be spending more time with a new group of friends, or might no longer interact publicly with a long-time friend. “Regardless of whether your child’s behavior fits into any of these categories, it’s a good idea to proactively bring up the topic of cyberbullying,” Lupold Bair says. “Make sure your kids know what cyberbullying is, why it’s harmful, and what your expectations are for their online conduct. By keeping an ongoing dialog going, you’ll not only gain insight into the digital world in which your kids live, but you may also discover warning signs that your child’s online group is participating in these types of activities.” Specifically, Lupold Bair recommends discussing the following topics with your children: Joking vs. harassment The line between harmless joking and mean, harassing behaviors can often be a fine one, and younger children especially may have trouble recognizing when they’ve crossed it. Explain to your kids that any online behavior that makes another person feel upset, threatened, hurt, mocked, etc. can be considered bullying. If your child knows that one of his peers is uncomfortable with a specific online interaction—or if a particular online behavior would make your child feel upset if the shoe were on the other foot—it’s best not to participate. Appropriate online communication While it may seem obvious to many adults, kids frequently don’t understand that what they write or share in a digital format can often be forwarded, saved, or accessed by others. On a continuous basis, talk to your kids about what is appropriate to share online and what is not. Put a special emphasis on why it’s important to keep friends’ secrets and personal comSeptember - October 2013

munications private and where it is and isn’t safe to discuss these things. Standing up to bullies Teach your children how to stand up to their friends to discourage bullying behaviors online, if they’re comfortable doing so. Make sure they understand the importance of not standing by while others are being bullied and help them find the words to tell their friends that they refuse to participate in these bullying actions. Limiting contact with bullies Cyberbullying is often a group occurrence with more than one child playing a role and different participants contributing varying levels of bullying behaviors. Make sure your children know that they can often use blocking features on social media and chat sites to avoid online contact with bullies. Explain why being associated with a cyberbullying incident can have serious consequences, even if your child wasn’t the ringleader or even an active participant. Informing adults Encourage your kids to talk to teachers, coaches, and friends’ parents if they don’t feel comfortable coming to you with concerns about their own online behavior, which may have potentially crossed the line into cyberbullying. Also, encourage them to inform authority figures if they know another child is the victim of cyberbullying. Tell your kids that if they’re uncomfortable coming forward because they don’t want to attract the bully’s attention themselves, an anonymous note left on a coach’s or teacher’s desk, for example, can still be a tremendous help. “Don’t just assume that your child’s online activities are harmless, even if she’s generally a ‘good kid,’” Lupold Bair concludes. “Be proactive about discussing why cyberbullying is a major issue and how you expect your child to behave on all digital platforms. “In fact, I recommend creating and having your kids sign a document 34

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Hi Class Living

Lifestyle Buzz GustBuster Umbrellas GustBuster umbrellas are certified by the College of Aeronautics to withstand winds of 55+ mph and above. The patented umbrellas are available in several sizes and colors. www.gustbuster.com.

Munitio Re-engineers Nines Earphone Nines earphones by Munitio fuse sleek design with studio grade acoustics. They feature a three-button control, in line microphone, and silicone hollow points in three sizes. It is available in silver, gold, and black. www.munitio.com.

Brush Set from Ecotools Ecotools offers the Day-to-Night Set, a compact clutch with five soft makeup brushes. At www.ecotools.com and retailers.

Insulated Food Jars from Thermos Thermos insulated food jars provide a convenient way to pack fresh, healthy meals. Its double wall vacuum insulation is designed for hot or cold temperature retention. At www.thermos.com and select retailers September - October 2013

Lifestyle Buzz Sheer Coating Ampoule from Rene’s 31° Diamond Skincare Collection The 31° Sheer Coating Ampoule, is formulated with fine diamond powder, hyaluronic acid, collagen, and peptides to create a moisture barrier and keep the skin soft and supple. www.reneskin.com.

New AirEssence Diffusers from Agraria Agraria has introduced a new line of diffusers featuring sola flowers that absorb fragrant oils and slowly diffuse them into the air. The scents are presented in decorative perfume bottles with crystal trays. At Bergdorf Goodman, Saks Fifth Ave. and www.agrariahome.com

New Utility Knife from Irwin The new Irwin FK250 folding utility knife features a securely locked-in blade, a fold-out screwdriver, bit storage, and a wire stripper. It includes 3 blades, #2 Phillips, and #2 square insert bits. www.irwin.com.

Wallets and Passport Wallets by Würkin Stiffs Fight Identity Theft The Wurkin Stiffs wallets are designed to protect credit cards from identity thieves who use wireless scanners. The wallets block the RFID signal with a thin alloy matrix fused between the Italian calfskin leather. At www. wurkinstiffs.com and at fine retailers.

Hi Class Living

Happily What Are The

ou are moving in together. You are committed to each other but don’t plan to get married. Here’s what you need to know from a financial point of view. A committed emotional relationship evolves into a financial relationship as you start to share the costs and concerns of everyday life. However, handling day-to-day living expenses is the simple part. It’s when you get into things like large purchases, buying a home, insurance, retirement and estate planning that it gets more complicated. And many of the financial concerns have to do with what happens if you break up. There’s no clearly defined legal structure for the division of property for unmarried couples. So it’s up to you to figure out what’s fair to you both and create some guidelines, realizing that as your relationship grows, your decisions may evolve. It’s best to start with some honest discussion, a commitment to complete disclosure and a look to the future. Consider a domestic partnership agreement To help keep money misunderstandings to a minimum, put things in writing. A domestic partnership or cohabitation agreement is like a prenuptial agreement. It specifies roles and responsibilities, what you’ll share, what you’ll keep separate and how assets will be distributed should your relationship end. You don’t need a lawyer to do this. The important thing is that you agree on what’s fair now — and write down your agreements — to hopefully avoid problems later. Decide what you’ll share-and what you won’t Moving in together doesn’t necessitate complete financial togetherness. A “yours, mine and ours” approach is often the best and fairest. September - October 2013

Unmarried. Financial Issues?

Carrie Schwab-Pomerantz

Hi Class Living

Start by deciding which expenses you’ll share (for example, rent, groceries, utilities, joint entertainment and travel), and which you’ll pay for separately (such as clothes, individual car expenses, haircuts and solo entertainment). If one of you makes more money than the other, the higher earner would contribute more to the communal pot. That way, you can each have a fair amount of money for discretionary spending. To keep things simple, maintain your own checking and savings accounts, as well as credit cards. Open a joint account for shared expenses and possibly a joint savings account for mutual goals. Agree on big-ticket purchases Give some extra thought to big purchases like a car, computer or flat-screen TV. If you pay for expensive items like these together, you’ll want to make sure your agreement mentions dividing things equitably in a break up. Or you could agree to buy these things separately — and still enjoy them together. Be careful when titling property Property that involves a title, such as a car or a house, can get a bit trickier. Titling a car is pretty straightforward, but there’s more to consider with a home. If only one of you buys the house and has sole title, the other could be left with nothing. If you both contribute to the purchase, both your names should be on the title. You can purchase a house either as joint tenants with the right of survivorship or tenants in common. As joint tenants, you each own half the property and inherit the other half if one of you dies. As tenants in common, you can each own any percentage of the property and sell or pass it on to whomever you wish. If you contribute unequally, and decide to take title as tenants in common, be sure to keep careful track of each person’s contributions to ongoing improvements and maintenance. I highly recommend consulting an attorney to make sure you both understand September - October 2013

the implications of your decisions. Think about taxes As an unmarried couple, you can’t file a joint tax return. But if you have children, one of you could file as “head of household.” This would allow that person to have a higher standard deduction, an extra personal exemption and potentially lower tax rates. It generally makes the most sense for the higher earner to do this. Safeguard your present, and your future From health insurance, to saving, to retirement planning, there’s a lot you can do to protect yourselves and each other. Here’s where to get started: • Health insurance: First, if either of you lacks health insurance, check with your employers to see if domestic partner coverage is available. • Savings: Then you should each focus on saving, both in short-term emergency funds and in long-term retirement accounts. • Beneficiaries: As your commitment grows and strengthens, you can consider making each other the beneficiary on your retirement and other investment accounts. Other safeguards to put in place as time goes on, especially if you have children, are: • Will: Specify the distribution of financial assets and personal possessions and the guardianship of young children. • Durable power of attorney: This is so you can make financial decisions on each other’s behalf should either of you become disabled. • Medical powers of attorney: This is so you can make medical decisions for one another. Be flexible At this point, you can keep things simple. As your finances — and your family — grow, you can always make modifications. In the meantime, coming to some initial financial agreements, and putting them in writing, will provide a solid financial foundation on which to build your life together. ∆

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Hi Class Living

Teaching Kids To Be

arents are often flummoxed when it comes to teaching their own children how to become more organized.

September - October 2013

Organized Sarah Welch And Alicia Rockmore

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Fall Fashion

s the weather changes, we’re ready warm up to cozy sweaters and boots. He favorite must-haves to put on your

A knee-length coat The newest silhouettes are roomy, menswear-inspired, knee-length designs that will wrap you up in style. And if you really want to get in on the latest coat trend, go pastel and think blush pink. The chunky sweater The knits this season are bigger and bolder — perfect to wear with skinny jeans or leggings. Think thick fisherman cables or Fair Isle patterns in pullovers and even vests. The fuller skirt Time to twirl. While the classic pencil skirt is always a style basic, the flirty “tulip” skirts are flipping out this fall. They’re the swingy counterpoint to the belted ‘40sstyle suit jackets and coats that plays off the Dior fit-and-flare silhouette. The moto jackeT It’s leather weather, and the motorcycle jacket outfitted with a military vibe and lots of hardware is one of fall’s most revved up looks. Pair it with distressed jeans for a

September - October 2013

casual look or a tweed skirt for a creative work style. The plaid prints The popular tartans have way outgrown their Ivy League past and now have more of a tough-girl edge showing up in designer collections in everything from short cropped jackets to babydoll dresses to skinny jeans. Pair your plaids with leather or black and you’ve really got the new pep in prep. The wide leg pant Move over skinny jeans, here comes the swagger. Wider leg pants are sailing into fall with great style riding the wave of the pajama party. Easy and breezy, these pants are best teamed with the cropped jackets and fitted sweaters. The fluffy fur Get ready to go wild and wooly with plush new furs. Whether you like the real thing or prefer to do faux, you’ll find plenty of the fluff stuff from boleros to vests. Even shoes and sunglasses get the furry treat-

Musts

Sharon Mosley

to chill out and re are 10 of fall’s shopping list:

ment this fall. A colorful tweed suit Suits are back in classic nubby tweed. The newest tweeds brighten up any wardrobe with vivid youthful colors like cobalt blue or emerald green or hot pink. The pointy toe pump or boot Pointed toes are the newest way to go whether it’s a pump with a metallic toe or a lace-up granny bootie. Tip: Don’t get cramped with these new styles. Experiment with one size larger and use gel inserts for cushioning. The foldover clutch These envelope-style handbags can hold it all — from iPads to iPhones, files and more. They can go from day to evening and back again and easily slip inside a bigger tote. The latest updates include lots of embossed snakeskin details, metal studs and zippers. A little punky purse can go a long way on style this fall. ∆ Foldover leather clutch from RK New York’s latest collection.

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Jazz Your W

et the fringe and the feathers fly. Put some swing into your wardrobe by jazzing it up and channeling the styles of the Roaring Twenties.

From Prada to H&M, there’s some Jazz Age glamour for everyone. Here’s how to kick up a little art deco flair of your own: Start with the drop-waist flapper dress There’s no better way to jazz up your wardrobe this season than to don one of these slinky sheath-style dresses embellished with beading, metallic threading or embroidery. Go with the high-low hems From the knee to the ankle, this is a great way to highlight your best features by choosing a dress or skirt with a pointed hemline that dips and rises in all the right places. Choose chiffon Free and flowing is the name of the dress game when it comes to kicking up your heels in the deco designs this year. The fabrics are soft and supple, providing Glamorous silhouette of the Jazz Age by Thea. September - October 2013

Up ardrobe Sharon Mosley

nonrestrictive flattering silhouettes — perfect for doing the Charleston.

Bridal and Evening Shoes Custom Shoe Dying Designer Clothing Personal Attention

Add some fringe and feathers Whether on that flapper-inspired dress or a hip-length jacket or swingy skinny skirt, fringe and feathers are a jazzy way to dress up anything you put on. And it’s really easy to throw on a feather boa to give your cocktail dress instant drama.

Add jewelry Accessorize with long ropes of cultured pearls, arm bracelets and chandelier earrings. Top it off with a decorative “pouch” purse trimmed with tassels. And complete your jazzy look with T-strap pumps. Now you’re ready to dance the night away! ∆

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Add accessories The fashion extras that complement all the Jazz Age designs are legendary, especially the millinery -- from tightfitting cloche hats to elaborate jeweled and feathered headpieces to Oriental toques and turbans.

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Get exotic Patterns and prints are another way to jazz up your wardrobe. Think geometric art nouveau or East Asian designs in particular. These artistically inspired motifs are easily incorporated into your everyday wardrobe with kimono-style jackets, shawls or scarves. Look for the unstructured evening coat trimmed with fur. And harem pants, anyone?

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Packin

raveling in style

does not have to be an oxymoron. There are lots of ways to look great while seeing the sights, but it takes a little bit of planning before you hit the tarmac.

Whether youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re flying off to an adventure in Italy or rolling down the road to rendezvous with friends, here are some tips to packing it in style: Choose your luggage carefully With new airline regulations about carry-on luggage, having lightweight but heavy duty portable roller cases and totes September - October 2013

are critical. Black does go with everything, but hot pink is easy to spot at the airport carousel. Pack makeup in a small zippered bag that can double as a clutch for evenings out. Make a list Yes, it may take a little more time than just throwing in what you wore last week into a suitcase, but thinking through what

g It In

By Sharon Mosley

Photo courtesy of H&M.

you will be doing on your trip will pay off. Start at least a few weeks ahead if possible, so you can fill in the blanks if you need to. Think double duty You donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have to wear something different everyday, complete with matching accessories. Instead, think about ways the same item can be worn different ways: a slinky tunic dress can be worn over a

swimsuit and dressed up for cocktails, or a cardigan sweater can be worn buttoned up for a daytrip exploring ancient ruins and left open over a camisole for dinner at night. Mix and match Choose two colors and plan your travel wardrobe around them â&#x20AC;&#x201D; then add accent color with accessories. Black and white is

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usually a perfect travel combo accessorized with red or turquoise shoes and jewelry. A bold-colored handbag or tote is also another great way to add some style factor to your wardrobe. Go for wrinkle-free fabrics Pack cotton-nylon blends of T-shirts and pants and tissue-weight cotton skirts that are easy to roll up and wear right out of the duffel bag. Soft knits are perfect for a long plane or car ride. Loose-fitting cotton or jersey tank dresses and tunics also make great travel companions. Add accessories Freshen up those mix and match pieces that you double up on wearing during your vacation with extra accessories that Cyber Bullying — From Pg. 18 called a Digital Family Policy,” she adds. “It should include rules and expectations for all technology use. Be sure to include information regarding how you define cyberbullying and what the consequences will be if your child crosses that line.”

Defining Cyberbullying: A Parent’s Guide When most of today’s parents were growing up, bullying was largely limited to in-person interactions. For that reason, it can be difficult to intuitively and fully understand what our children are facing as they navigate the digital landscape. In essence, cyberbullying comprises any digital communication, typically from one minor to another minor, with the purpose of frightening, threatening, embarrassing, or harassing a person. The most common form of cyberbullying is sharing a private text message, e-mail, or instant message (IM) with someone else or through a public posting. Cyberbullies’ tools are computers and smartphones and they plague victims via text, e-mail, IM, chat rooms, social media, and blogs. September - October 2013

will transform your outfits. Try an oversized scarf that you can use as a shawl at night and perhaps a swimsuit coverup during the day. One statement necklace or cuff bracelet will also give your travel wardrobe a style boost as will a head wrap scarf. An oversized tote can double as a beach bag. And packable hats are a musthave for sun protection. Travel in flats Flip flops may be your go-to shoes for travel, but standing in the security lines at the airport barefooted is not fun. Instead, wear sheer socks and tuxedo-style flats that are easy to slip on and off. Canvas slip-on espadrilles are another favorite. And always pack your Nikes for hikes and long walks. ∆

Examples of cyberbullying behaviors

• Using websites to rank or rate peers according to criteria such as looks and popularity • Publicly blocking someone’s participation in an online group • Tricking someone into sharing embarrassing information with the purpose of sharing it digitally with others • Creating a website with the purpose of harassing someone • Creating a fake social media account to pose as another person and post untrue things about that person • Sending threatening or mean e-mails, text messages, and IMs in chat rooms • Posting embarrassing pictures of someone on a social media website The effects of cyberbullying can be far more devastating for victims than traditional bullying because: • Cyberbullies often remain anonymous, making victims unsure of how to protect themselves and whom to trust • Victims often receive bullying messages via their home computer, taking away their feeling of safety within their

Just Arrived own home • Victims may be affected both at school and online, taking away two primary locations where teens socialize and interact • Cyberbullies can reach a large number of people easily and instantly, making it possible for the entire world to see the behaviors and shared information about the victim • Because cyberbullies don’t face their victims, the bullying behaviors are often more extreme than traditional bullying • Cyberbullies can attack their victims frequently on multiple technology platforms. ∆ BAD Habits— From Pg. 14 can serve him better. Maybe it’s shutting down your email so you can better concentrate on the task at hand. The better you get at what you do, the more rewarding it will be. Fudging the truth You may think you’re always honest with your clients, but do a little soulsearching and you might be shocked at the number of little white lies, exaggerations, mis-directions, and lies of omission you’re guilty of. For example, “I’m not going to meet my deadline so I’ll tell him I’m sick to buy myself a couple more days.” Or, “This is probably not the best vendor for this particular client, but since she (the vendor) sends us a lot of business, I’m going to recommend her anyway.” Sound familiar? “When you cultivate a reputation for rock-solid honesty — for laying out all your cards even when it doesn’t benefit you, for telling the whole truth, for never holding back or sugarcoating — you’ll gain customer loyalty that money can’t buy,” asserts Callaway. “Clients will trust, respect, and refer you, and your own life will become easier. When you have only the truth, you wave goodbye to moral dilemmas and sleepless nights. You don’t have to worry about getting the story straight or remembering what you 46

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Before You Say ‘I

efore you give your heart to a piece of uph

What kind of relationship are you looking for? The first step toward a happy match is to set some expectations for your relationship with your new furniture. Realistically, how long are the two of you going to be together? How you answer will determine what kind of frame you pick to go under all that lovely upholstery fabric. A long-term marriage Do you want a sofa or chair that will stand by you in good times and bad, never sagging or swaying, going lumpy or limp? Then pick a high-quality frame. That means one that’s kiln-dried with September - October 2013

eight-way, hand-tied coil springs. If you’re looking at a sofa on a showroom floor, quiz the sales associate about how the piece is made. If they don’t know, that’s a bad sign. Pick up a corner of the sofa and see what the body does. If it stays really stiff and straight, with no twisting or sagging, it’s a quality frame. See if the legs and arms of the sofa are made from the same piece of wood. If the legs screw into the base, that’s a sure sign of a lower-quality sofa or chair. See if the pattern on the upholstery fabric lines up where the cushions rest against the back of the sofa. If it’s a stripe, for example,

Do’ To Furniture

Mary Carol Garrity

olstered furniture, ask yourself these questions: the stripe should run straight from the pillow up the back of the sofa without jogging out of alignment. While top-quality frames aren’t cheap, they are a good investment. You can reupholster them time and again, saving you lots of money in the long run. A seven-year fling Not everyone wants to spend decades with the same sofa. It may be a matter of changing tastes and styles, or of budget. If you decide to go with a less-expensive piece, I’d recommend against having it reupholstered when the fabric starts to wear out. Most likely, the frame will be

falling apart, too. How will the furniture be used in your home? Where your furniture will be placed and how it will be used are huge considerations when deciding what type of piece to get and what kind of fabric you want to cover it with. Is this the place where you will watch TV every night, or will it be more for show in a rarely used room? Are pets, kids or messy husbands going to be sitting in it? Where will the furniture be placed — by a sunny window, for instance? Your answers will determine how du-

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rable a fabric you’ll need. If the piece won’t get a lot of use, the sky is the limit on fabrics. You can pick the weight, pattern and texture you like best. But the more it’s used, the more durable, and camouflaging, the fabric has to be. Unfortunately, your choices begin to narrow a bit as you go up the durability scale. You may choose outdoor fabrics and use them upholstered pieces. You can find them in a wide array of colors and patterns, and the texture doesn’t feel scratchy and stiff like it used to back in the day. It’s an ideal option for seats where people will be eating or pets will be sleeping. I also recommend linen for people who want a fairly durable fabric. Don’t assume that because a fabric you pick is more expensive that it is more durable. Some upholstery fabrics are highercost because they have a bigger pattern with a large repeat. Remember that solids can show spills more than patterns. If you spill a few drops of wine or juice on a solid-color sofa, it can leave a ring. What kind of fabric fans your flame? The color and style of your upholstery fabric is a very personal decision. There are lots of solid fabrics, from trendy brights to timeless classics like cream-and-navy. And there are also lots and lots of geometric BAD HABITS — From Pg. 35 have or haven’t shared. You know you’re doing the right thing.” TACTIC: You know that thing you’ve been wanting to say for a long time? Go ahead and say it. Don’t worry about the fallout. Bravely take the leap. You’ll find that most people want the truth. Give it to them and you’ll be joined together in a bond that never betrays. Being too professional Yes, there is such a thing! Think about it: Do you see your clients as business opportunities and sources of income, or do you see them as actual human beings September - October 2013

prints and stripes. Another fun trend are traditional patterns, like a Williamsburg, reinvented with wild, bright colors, making them fresh and new, not stuck in the past. Floral fabric is back, too, but today’s florals are color-saturated with cleaner graphic elements. If you are upholstering a big piece like a sofa, avoid a pattern you will grow tired of quickly. I recommend a solid or muted pattern in a classic color. Then, bring in color and pattern through accent pillows. Get a bit more daring on occasional chairs, maybe by picking a graphic pattern, floral or plaid. For an upholstered ottoman, indulge in a bold, statement fabric. These pieces are the perfect place to experiment because they are inexpensive to re-cover if you ever grow tired of the look. Do you want to trick up your furniture with trim? People always forget about the role trim can play in taking furniture from ordinary to extraordinary. When you go with custom furniture, the sky is the limit. A classic look is to trim your furniture in the same fabric used on the cushion. It looks clean and simple, and is always a safe choice. Right now, nail-head trim is big. It’s a great way to add some sizzle to a piece of furniture. ∆

with likes, preferences, quirks, and stories? To truly put clients first, your number one goal at each meeting and during each phone call should be to invite them within arm’s length and make them less of a stranger. “People want to do business with individuals they like — and they like people who like them!” Callaway points out. “Sure, it’s important not to cross certain boundaries, but there’s no reason you can’t strive to make a deeper connection with your clients by asking about their kids, their pets, their hobbies, and their jobs or businesses. 58 46

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New Tile Trends Patricia Sheridan

hat could be new about something that has been around for more than 4,000 years? When it comes to tile, a lot.

During Coverings 2013, the largest tile-and-stone trade expo in the country, the buzz was about baking technology, science and great design into modern ceramic tile. Innovations over the past several years have included superthin, extremely light tile that can be applied to cabinets or counters, very thick and anti-slip tile that can be used on uneven outdoor surfaces and tile that can resist wide temperature fluctuations. Antibacterial tile is a smart option for bathrooms, hospitals, schools or any public place. Some tile even cleans the air and itself. American-based Crossville teamed up with Japanese company Toto to create ceramic tile that purifies the air and destroys stains. A special coating that is baked onto the surface of the tile is activated by light. Crossville uses recycled content in its products. Italian company Casagrande Padana is turning out its own self-cleaning ceramic that works like trees, removing nitrogen oxide produced by car exhaust from the atmosphere. This is tile and technology at its best. Digital inkjet printing revolutionized the manufacturing of ceramic and porcelain tile. One of the great things about this process is that it can reproduce the look of stones that are extinct or are not environmentally responsible to harvest. Tile makers in Spain, Italy, Mexico and beyond are embracThe look of marble is done in ceramic tiles by Keraben. September - October 2013

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ing environmentally friendly practices and adopting the Tile Council of North America’s Green Squared certification for porcelain tile as the industry’s watermark for sustainable practices. Since tile is a natural product made of pyrolized red or white clay, it’s the grout, sealants, adhesives, manufacturing and installation processes that are constantly being evaluated in terms of the environment. The biggest style trend now is the look of wood, with reclaimed wood being a favorite for wall and floor tiles. Like pre-washed jeans, it’s not enough to imitate natural materials such as cement, stone and wood. They must also have a time-worn patina. Florida Tiles showed Magnolia, a printed wood look that comes in a variety of colors. Fioranese’s Old Wood series is nearly indistinguishable from the real thing; even wood’s texture is replicated. Aparici, which does great inkjet designs, showed several of its Sonar collection of ceramic wood-flooring options together for an impressive display. Viva Made’s Street collection of ceramic planks was an urbaninspired design. For a very dramatic effect, Over by Cerdomus combines black and white wood-style tile planking. The Maderia Collection by Keraben was another

September - October 2013

example of tile imitating wood that would be perfect for mudrooms and kitchens. Del Conca and Cisa Ceramiche are just two companies that have re-created the look of petrified wood on tile. Del Conca Fast is a high-tech tile installed without joints, adhesives or grout. It’s basically a floating ceramic floor. Fiandre’s large-format, manmade Precious Stone collection uses the best of inkjet printing to create porcelain wall panels that are as artistic as they are architectural. And Emil Ceramica introduced Stone Box. Each box has 36 tiles representing different stones such as marble, granite, onyx, etc., but the color palette is the same. Porcelanosa has created textural tiles that look and feel like fabric, waves or fallen leaves. They are so skilled at imitation that Porcelanosa USA holds a Royal Warrant from the Prince of Wales. As far as color, mid-tones, neutrals, beige and far more than 50 shades of gray were being offered in all tile categories. Red and green remain popular accent colors. Interceramic introduced Moods, a concept that uses specific palettes incorporating glass, ceramic and other tile combinations. Exterior tile on buildings is more popu-

This Aparici distressed-wood-look ceramic floor has an authentic texture.

Marazzi USA 3D (Digital Design Definition) floor tile in "hidro grey" mosaic.

lar in Europe than the United States, but that could be changing with products such as Cooperative of D’Imola Ceramica’s woodlike ceramic siding. The color and texture say wood, but it resists the elements with ease. So why choose a porcelain or ceramic tile over real wood, stone or concrete? Because tile is all about easy maintenance, high per-

formance and durability. Tile’s design possibilities have attracted architect-designer Philippe Starck, who has teamed with Sant’Agostino, and singer/songwriter Lenny Kravitz, who is working with Lea Ceramiche, to add their creative vision to wall tiles. Tile is forever with an almost infinite lifespan. ∆

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Integrating TVs Into Your Decor Michelle Jennings Wiebe

he family room used to be the main television viewing room. Now, more families want their TVs in bedrooms, bathrooms, kitchens and outdoors.

Televisions have become ultra-thin, so the possibilities have skyrocketed in how to creatively integrate, or hide, them in interiors. If done correctly, these â&#x20AC;&#x153;customizedâ&#x20AC;? features can add to the value of your home. Here are some of my favorites:

cavity that was specifically sized to the correct dimensions. When you put a TV over a fireplace, make sure that you properly research the insulation and any other specifications needed to ensure that the television doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t overheat from the fire.

Contemporary seamless design above fireplace It is important to purchase or select your TV before the wall niche size is fabricated. This recessed niche is where your television will be mounted, and the television and side speakers can be recessed into a custom polished concrete

Traditional design above classic mantle and fireplace This style is also designed and planned on paper before any wall framing or drywall installation is done. This ensures that the television size again fits like a glove above the horizontal mantle of the fireplace. Molding and recessed shelves

September - October 2013

TV inside mirror by Seura. can be designed around the fireplace and television, the focal point of this family room. If you are a do-it-yourselfer, make sure that you are measuring everything for the right fit. Automated drop down ceiling lift Typically this kind of system is chosen when the homeowner wants to conceal the television when itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not in use. With a remote control, the television moves quietly and quickly into the ceiling where it does not interfere with the view, or the look of the room when not in use.

Vanishing television mirrors Seura offers a way to perfectly integrate and hide your television. There is no separate frame for the TV; itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s seamlessly installed inside the mirror. Watch your favorite shows while the television is on, but once you turn the TV off by remote, it completely disappears. The televisionâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s viewing sizes from Seura come in 10 inches and 19 inches, measured on a diagonal. Televisions built into furniture It is also possible to buy or design furniture that has the television and other media

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systems built into it. Check out “Hi Can” by Dornob.com for examples, such as a bed that is virtually an “all-in-one-standalone-room” with everything needed to be entertained. Fast facts about today’s TVs • LED televisions are very thin, perfect for wall-mounted applications. • Low-profile mounting brackets are critical when trying to nestle a television TEACHING KIDS— From Pg. 27 they felt their children lacked, what they wished the schools would teach and what they already did in order to help their children. One of the biggest surprises: An overwhelming number of parents (about 80 percent) said they felt that their children’s most serious problem was a total lack of organizational skills -- how to organize a locker, a backpack, a notebook, a schedule. The list went on and on. Neuroscientists have made considerable advances in the past 20 years in their understanding of how the brain develops and functions. Among the discoveries: The prefrontal cortex, the part of our brain that is otherwise known as the executive function, does not develop fully until age 19 or 20. Until then, the limbic system (our instinctive “caveman” brain) is driving the bus. So, like it or not, as parents we are responsible for first serving as, and then coaching into maturity, our children’s executive function. Given the correlation between a welldeveloped executive function and success, here are four tips for helping your child(ren) develop this essential skill. Start early The development of the prefrontal cortex/executive function comes in fits and starts, with radical advances coming between the ages of 3 and 7. So, as a parent, you should start getting kids used to basic organizational tasks by the third birthday. Routines to consider for all 3to 7-year-olds include: toy cleanup, and September - October 2013

tight against the wall. • Purchase a universal RF remote, such as the Logitech-Harmony 900, to avoid having cable boxes and other electronic equipment visible. • The size of your television will dictate how far away your sofa or bed should be for optimal viewing distance. • The size of a television is measured on its diagonal from one top corner to the opposite bottom corner. ∆

morning routines that get them in the habit of getting dressed, brushing their teeth and making their beds. If you’ve missed that window, don’t worry. It is certainly possible to help your child develop and improve her organizational skills as long as she is living with you. Start small If you have a child who is struggling with organization in general, don’t try to fix things all at once. Zero in on one area and focus on getting that under control first. For example, if you have a sixthgrader who is falling behind on homework and has a messy room and a messy locker, ignore the messes for now and concentrate on establishing an organizational framework for homework. Start with a dedicated homework notebook (if he picks it out, he’s more likely to use it), establish a dedicated time and place for completing homework and a system for checking his work before he organizes it in the appropriate folders before bed each evening. If you have a young child, don’t try to establish morning and evening routines at the same time. Pick one (we’d recommend morning) and work on that until it is cemented. Positive reinforcement Such reinforcement, whether it’s adding a sticker to a prominently displayed chart, an enthusiastic “Great job!” or an actual physical reward, links your child’s behavior with a positive outcome, making it much more likely the desired behavior will

be repeated. According to a behavioralguidelines checklist published by Utah State University, positive reinforcement is most effective when it occurs immediately after the behavior. The guidelines also recommend that the reinforcement be presented enthusiastically and frequently. Just be sure the reinforcement you choose is age-appropriate (chore charts tend to be sneered at by teenagers, for example).

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September - October 2013

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BAD HABITS— From Pg. 46 “A client who is thrilled that you remembered her upcoming anniversary or the fact that she recently became a grandmother will be more loyal and more likely to refer you to others,” he adds. TACTIC: Every time you meet with a client, ask at least one question that has nothing to do with business. Ask about their kids. Ask about their pets. Ask about their favorite food, or movie, or vintage car. The conversation will likely develop in a surprising direction. As you hear their stories and get to know their joys and sorrows, you’ll start liking them. And you’ll find it more natural to put them first as clients Thinking that you know best It’s true that you, not the customer, are the expert on your business. You are the one who knows how to sell real estate or market a product or properly install a heat pump. But does that mean that yours is the only opinion that matters? Of course not. No matter what industry you’re in, you need to turn your viewpoint around and make a sincere effort to see yourself and your business as your client does. “Don’t make your business all about you. Think about what your clients want and figure out how to give it to them. When you turn it around and put yourself in the client’s shoes, you put the client first,” he says. TACTIC: Call up an ex-client and ask her how she sees your business. Assure her up-front that your goal is not to win her back. You just want the truth about how she perceives you and the truth about what she as a customer really wanted from you. If you are willing to do this, you’ll learn a lot about what needs to change. Being stingy with time and money We’ve all heard the expression “The more you give, the more you get.” And we understand its meaning when it comes to things like love, smiles, and kindness. But how does it relate to business? Well, you September - October 2013

can give your clients honesty, competence, and care, and hope to get those things back. But if you give away your expertise, time, energy, and (gasp!) money, won’t you just go broke? “Not necessarily,” says Callaway. “Understand that giving to get isn’t like a financial transaction where you give and get right there and then,” Callaway adds. “There is no up-front agreement on what you’ll receive or when you’ll receive it. It may take time. But rest assured, whatever you give will come back to you with interest.” TACTIC: Look for something to give away. (And don’t be cheap about it!) Whether you give free popcorn to moviegoers or a free grooming to pet boarding clients or a gorgeous framed print to your interior design clients, you make them feel special. This will keep them coming back. Not expressing genuine gratitude Sure, you may close each interaction with a “thank you for your business” or some variation thereof. But that doesn’t mean that your clients walk away feeling the warm fuzzies that accompany being truly appreciated. “Strive to make politeness, consideration, and friendliness things your company is known for, and never justify treating customers with rudeness,” he adds. “And, of course, when it’s financially possible, give loyal customers a freebie, discount, or gift to show them you’re thankful for their business.” TACTIC: List the reasons why you’re grateful for your clients. Obviously you’re grateful for the fact that they allow you to make a living. But chances are, they bring more to the table than financial rewards, such as their loyalty, their referrals, the lessons they’ve taught you, and the relationships you’ve built together. With this list fresh on your mind, any expression of thanks — whether overt or implied — will be delivered with a ring of truth that money can’t buy. 62

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Animal Yields Better He

ne of the worst parts of advancing age is the gradual loss of contact with those we love. As baby boomers, many of us first lose our children to college, then to spouses and ultimately to grandchildren. As we age further, some of us will become frail, dependent on others for transportation and might need help with the simple tasks of daily life. One thing leads to another, and it becomes increasingly difficult to avoid loneliness and isolation. It is vitally important to fill the empty nest with the unconditional love of a pet. The link between pets and health promotion is very clear. Many research studies show that contact with animals powerfully

September - October 2013

Contact alth, Less Stress

Dr. David Lipschitz

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assists in improving the health of nursing home patients and hastens the recovery of hospitalized patients. Studies on individuals of all ages clearly show that 15 minutes of direct contact with a pet reduces stress, lowers blood pressure, slows heart rate, improves sleep and reduces the risk of depression. For men and women, interacting with a pet fosters nurturing, rapport, socialization, entertainment and exercise. Recent studies show that people who walk with dogs exercise more consistently and experience bigger fitness results than those who walk with a two-legged friend. Dogs are more reliable, walk faster and can often be more convincing enthusiasts for the regular walk. But the most important health benefit of a pet’s companionship is the physical contact and touch. Contact with a dog or a cat is safe, soothing and nonthreatening. One stroke of a cat’s back or the touch of a cold puppy nose, and out of nowhere, unhappy patients smile, unwind and feel a deep sense of gratitude and contentment. Pets of all kinds are particularly important to older people who live alone or who reside in nursing homes. Published in Occupational Therapy International, recent research showed that contact with pets and the resulting companionship and sensory stimulation improved the ability of nursing home residents to socialize while decreasing stress, anger and disruptive behavior. In addition, pet therapy decreased the need for sedatives or medications to prevent agitation. Self-esteem, patient independence and

increased responsibility were also noted. Occupational and physical therapists found that pet therapy had many physical benefits for patients. Muscle strength and range of movement improved, and pain management was more successful. Pets also reduced blood pressure and slowed heart rate. As the healthful benefits of pets become more clear, many apartments, condominiums and assisted-living facilities are accepting animals. And the demand for “pet-friendly” establishments will only grow as the baby boomer generation marches past 65. Luckily, most long-term care facilities, hospitals and health clinics already have programs in place for animal-assisted therapy. There are training programs available to teach volunteers how to facilitate interactions between patients and a pet. Individuals who are interested can find local community programs, often through animal-training associations, to certify their pets as therapy animals. For adults who volunteer in pet-therapy programs, the health benefits are doubly strong! Not only do you get to care for and interact with your animal, but you also get the fulfillment of seeing others benefit from your pet. If you are older and live alone, consider getting a pet. Whether it’s a dog, cat, bird or even an iguana, a pet can be an amazing addition to your life. The unconditional love we give and receive from a pet doesn’t only improve health, but also fulfills a critical need in our lives. ∆

BAD HABITS— From Pg. 58 Doing it all yourself When you truly care about the success of your business — and about the wellbeing of your clients — it can be hard

to let go of any aspect of your work. The thought of allowing someone else to take over any area of responsibility is extremely worrisome; after all, what

It is vitally important to fill the empty nest with the unconditional love of a pet.

September - October 2013

Writing off difficult clients Sometimes, it seems that your job — and life in general — would be so much easier without that one client. You know the type: Maybe he just can’t be satisfied. Or she asks for way more of your time. “Even when clients make your life a lot more difficult, your job is to serve them. And here’s the payoff: When you make the choice to stand by all of your frazzled, frustrated customers, you will eventually reap financial and personal rewards. You may even become known in your company or industry as the guy or gal who can handle the toughest customers — and receive referrals as a result!” TACTIC: The next time a client makes you want to pull your hair out, get to the bottom of why he’s being so difficult. When you know why a client is throwing a fit you’ll be inspired to go to greater lengths on his behalf! “This list may seem overwhelming at first,” Callaway acknowledges. “But trust me, it isn’t. If you commit yourself to your clients’ best interests, your bad relationship habits will begin to dissipate on their own. And over time, your clients will begin to take care of you just as you have taken care of them.” ∆

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if they mess it up? What if, because of another person’s mistakes, you end up letting a client down or delivering subpar results? What ends up happening in both scenarios is that you become stretched too thin, feel overwhelmed, and (ironically) become less effective. “Giving part of your responsibility to someone else is always a leap of faith at first. But if you refuse to believe that anyone else can do what you do, then your efforts to grow and serve are doomed.”says Callaway. TACTIC: Delegate one responsibility to someone else. The point is to pick something that another person can duplicate and get it off your plate so that you can devote more of your time and energy to the things that no one else can do.

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Causes A Of Skin

kin cancer has become the most com than prostate, breast, lung

The American Cancer Society stated that more than 3.5 million cases of basal and squamous cell skin cancers, also known as non-melanoma cancers, are diagnosed annually in the U.S. Melanoma, the more dangerous type, will account for more than 76,600 cases of skin cancer in 2013. It also accounts for roughly 9,000 of the 12,000-plus deaths caused by skin cancer each year. The ACS says basal and squamous cell skin cancers are very common, very treatable and often found in sun-exposed areas — such as the head, neck and arms. Melanoma is more difficult to treat and is usually brown or black, but it also can be pink, tan or even white. And a fourth type of cancer, skin lymphoma, starts in cells that are part of the body’s immune system. According to the ACS, risk factors for non-melanoma and melanoma skin cancers include: • Being exposed to excessive or unprotected ultraviolet radiation, such as that from sunlight or a tanning booth. (The ACS says: “Tanning beds and sun lamps are dangerous. They also damage your skin.”) • Having suffered severe sunburns in the past. • Having pale skin, being easily sunburned or having natural red or blond hair. • Having many or unusual moles. • Having a family history of skin cancer. However, the sun and tanning booths are not solely responsible for skin cancers. There are other things that might seem to have little to do with skin but have strong correlations or links to skin cancer. People who have organ transplants increase their odds by 200 times of having skin cancer because of medications that have to be taken to suppress the immune system, according to Dr. Sherrif Ibrahim, an assistant pro- 69 September - October 2013

nd Cures Cancer

Chuck Norris

mon global cancer, with more annual cases and colon cancers combined.

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The Lodge

A Destinatio

September - October 2013

At Woodloch

n Spa Resort

Jane And Marius Rubin

he Lodge at Woodloch is a luxurious destination spa resort set on 150 pristine, wooded acres with a private lake in Northeast Pennsylvania. The two and a half hour drive from the George Washington Bridge takes you over the Delaware River along sprawling fields, rolling hills, and lush forests. You enter the resort’s main building through a soaring glass-enclosed atrium with a huge cupola, and a set of three giant chakra bowls. You instantly feel relaxed. The lodge has 57 guestrooms and suites, some overlooking the forest and lake, others facing the resort’s manicured grounds and rock garden waterfall. The spacious rooms offer private verandas, marble bathrooms with glass enclosed rain showers, separate toilets, double vanities, and filtered water faucets. The price of the room includes all meals, use of the spa and fitness facilities and a myriad of classes and activities from dawn to dusk. The heart of the property is the 40,000 square foot state-of-the-art spa, an oasis of indulgence and pampering. It features 27 treatment rooms, and men and women’s sanctuaries with saunas, steam rooms, whirlpools, fireplaces and screened porches. The spa’s main attraction is the co-ed Aqua Garden, a huge glassenclosed space where you can swim in the large pool, soak in the

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Aqua Garden.

Hydromassage waterfalls.

Sesame crusted tuna. The lake.

September - October 2013

therapeutic whirlpools under four and eight-foot hydromassage water falls, dip in the outdoor hot tub, and relax on the sun deck. The spa offers numerous treatments ranging from facials and massages to body wraps and energy work. Don’t miss their signature 100 minute Rosemary Awakening, a stimulating body scrub with rosemary and citrus, followed by a massage with herbal heat packs, and ending with a wrap and scalp massage. Also try the Chakra Balancing massage, a blend of Swedish and Thai massage techniques using aromatherapy oils designed to balance all of your seven chakras (centers of energy). The resort offers a daily program of classes, workshops and programs designed to rejuvenate your body, spirit and mind. Depending on the season, you can try outdoor activities such as walks on the mile-long paved path, guided mountain hikes, biking, canoeing, fly fishing with an Orvis certified instructor, snow shoeing, cross country skiing, and more. Join a yoga class, breathing meditation session, or a high-energy cardio workout. Don’t miss the exciting Drums Alive — a fun class that combines movement and rhythm. You can also partake in drawing or water color sessions, or participate in cooking demonstrations in the specially equipped kitchen. The resort offers three daily meals at Tree, their elegant restaurant that overlooks the wooded grounds. Breakfast and lunch combine buffet offerings and regular entrées, while dinner is entirely a la carte. The delicious and beautifully presented dishes are created with mostly fresh, organic ingredients, many from the resort’s own gardens. The Lodge at Woodloch, a perennial winner of numerous travel awards, is a perfect place to unwind and rejuvenate. For reservations call 866.953.8500 or visit www. thelodgeatwoodloch.com. ∆ 68

CAUSES AND CURES — From Pg. 64 fessor of dermatology at the University of Rochester Medical Center. People with autoimmune diseases, who often take the same medications, can also increase their chances of developing skin cancer because of those drugs, according to Dr. Alan Fleischer, a dermatology professor at Wake Forest Baptist Medical Center. In addition, some of the genes that cause Parkinson’s disease have also been linked to skin cancers. On-the-job exposure to coal tar pitch, creosote, radium, arsenic compounds and some pesticides may also give rise to skin cancer. Fleischer said that even getting a manicure exposes one to UV radiation, which is used to harden polishes. Compact fluorescent light bulbs, the so-called eco-friendly light bulbs, recently were studied by Berlin’s Alab Laboratory and found to release several carcinogenic chemicals and toxins — such as phenol, naphthalene and styrene — when turned on. Another popular trend making it more difficult to recognize potential skin cancers is tattoos. HealthDay noted: “Although tattoos aren’t known to increase the risk for skin cancer, tattoos can make it harder to detect cancer-related changes in moles. If you’re considering a tattoo, make sure there aren’t any moles in the area you’re thinking about inking, according to experts from the American Academy of Dermatology.” CURES Whatever the causes of skin cancers, prevention should be our goal. It all starts with minimizing exposure to all the things mentioned above that can cause or exacerbate skin cancers. Most of all, avoid prolonged exposure to intense sunlight, especially between 10 a.m. and 4 p.m., when it’s at its peak. Don’t use sunscreen as a justification for staying out in the sun for a long time. Even with a sun protection factor of 30, sunscreen, according to the American Cancer Society, “doesn’t protect from all UV rays.” SPF 15 blocks 93 percent. SPF 30 blocks 97 percent. And SPF 50 blocks 98

percent, according to a CNN report. And remember that sunscreens protect only against ultraviolet radiation of relatively short wavelengths (ultraviolet B rays), not ultraviolet radiation of relatively long wavelengths (ultraviolet A rays). Dr. Ariel Ostad, a clinical assistant professor in the department of dermatology at New York University Medical Center, explained, “Evidence has shown the best sunscreens are the ones that block UVB and UVA.” That is why Ostad and other experts recommend using products that are labeled “broad spectrum,” meaning they protect against both UVB rays, which cause sunburns, and UVA radiation, which causes premature skin damage and aging. One last bit of caution about sunscreens: Make sure it is oxybenzone-free. Oxybenzone, which is used in 56 percent of sunscreens — as well as many cosmetics, lip balms and moisturizers — is a chemical linked to hormone disruption and babies having low birth weight. Despite the fact that the Food and Drug Administration has approved oxybenzone in sunscreen for use on children older than 6 months, oxybenzone also can release free radicals to sun-exposed skin, which leads to cell damage and skin cancers, essentially canceling the very purpose of the sunscreen to which it is added, according to the Environmental Working Group and toxicology experts. The Environmental Working Group adds similar warnings for the chemical ingredient retinyl palmitate — a synthetic form of vitamin A found in about 25 percent of sunscreens — and issues a “low hazard” caution for the ingredient octocrylene, too. That is why skin specialists — including Jennalee Dahlen, esthetician at Santa Cruz Skin Solutions — recommend the most natural of sunscreens, such as “good old mineral-based sunscreens containing zinc oxide or titanium dioxide... products such as Badger, BurnOut, Jason and the Hungarian brand Eminence.” For more information on skin cancer go to (www.cancer.org) and (www.aad.org). ∆

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Ocean Place

September - October 2013

Resort And Spa

Jane and Marius Rubin

cean Place Resort & Spa is an elegant beach-side oasis of relaxation and pampering in Long Branch on the Jersey Shore. From the moment you enter the hotel you are surrounded by a luxurious atmosphere and beautiful decor. The spacious lobby is appointed with expansive marble floors, a soaring oversized chandelier, and a murmuring fountain. The resort offers 255 guestrooms and five suites, mostly with ocean views. Rooms on the top floors were recently renovated and decorated with coastal-themed furnishings and artwork.

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Start your day with an invigorating walk or a leisurely stroll along the oceanfront promenade and enjoy fresh sea breezes and panoramic ocean views. Stake your spot under a palm tree on the hotel’s private-access beach. The beach club, complimentary to resort guests, offers all amenities from towels, chairs and umbrellas to beach-side locker rooms. You can also swim in the outdoor and indoor heated pools or just soak in the bubbling whirlpools. Sip a refreshing cocktail or have some light fare at the thatched-roof Tiki Bar and enjoy live music on weekends. Make sure to allocate some pampering time at the resort’s European Spa, a fine facility with 15 treatment rooms and men’s and women’s lockers with steam, saunas, and whirlpools. Treat yourself to a Swedish massage or a rejuvenating facial. If you want to maintain your exercise regimen, work out at the fitness center - a well equipped facility with state-of-the-art PreCor machines, cardiovascular equipment, and weights. The resort offers several dining venues including an elegant dining room that serves buffet breakfasts, casual lunches and dinners. The menu is classic American with an emphasis on fresh local ingredients. In season, you can also enjoy “al fresco” dining on the seaside terrace, or order a light meal poolside. Ocean Place Resort and Spa is a perfect year-round getaway. Call 732-571-4000 or visit www.oceanplace.com.∆

Hotel lobby.

The spa.

Indoor pool.

Renovated guestroom.

September - October 2013

News and Openings Posh Collection in Ridgefield Posh Collection, a new fashion boutique for the trendy woman, has opened at 483 Bergen Blvd. in Ridgefield. The boutique features clothing, shoes, handbags and accessories from hot, emerging designers, as well as established brands, all at unbelievable prices. www.poshcollectionnj.com. 201-313-1200.

Morton’s at Riverside Square Morton’s Steakhouse at Riverside Square Mall in Hackensack has recently emerged from a complete renovation. Everything from carpeting to chandeliers was refurbished and spruced up. Even the menu was tweaked by adding new dishes. www.mortons.com. 201- 487-1303.

Make Up For Ever at the Garden State Plaza The Paris based professional make up brand, Make Up For Ever, has opened a new boutique in Westfield Garden State Plaza in Paramus. The shop carries more than 1,600 products in nearly every color including special FX items used on popular TV shows and films. 201-556-1070.

Michal Negrin Boutique at the Garden State Plaza Michal Negrin, the Israeli jewelry and fashion designer has opened a boutique at the Westfield Garden State Plaza mall in Paramus. The elegant store features Mrs. Negrin’s romantic and fanciful creations. www.michalnegrin.com. 201-843-3544.

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NYC ...plus Photo by Andrew Eccles

Alvin Ailey at City Center Alvin Ailey American Dance Theater returns to City Center from December 4, 2013 - January 5, 2014. The diverse repertory features premieres by choreographers Aszure Barton and Wayne McGregor, new productions of The River and Pas de Duke, as well as other favorite pieces. For tickets call 212-581-1212 or visit www.alvinailey.org.

Antonio Douthit-Boyd

The Parrish Museum in Water Mill The Parrish Museum from Southampton has relocated to a new building at 279 Montauk Hwy. in Water Mill. The long, barn-like structure, surrounded by grass fields, is reminiscent of the many barns that still dot the Long Island countryside. The museum’s light-filled galleries feature art by many celebrated artists who have lived and worked on the Island’s East end. 631-283-2118, www.parrishart.org.

Delmonico’s Restaurant in Southampton Delmonico’s of Southampton is a new restaurant from the celebrated Delmonico’s Restaurant in NYC. They serve an array of daily-caught seafood and farm-to-table specialties along with classic signature dishes such as the Delmonico Steak, Lobster Newburg and Eggs Benedict. Open year round, at 268 Elm St., Southampton. 631.283.0202 www.delmonicosrestaurantgroup.com.

Madison and Main Restaurant in Sag Harbour Madison and Main is a new American seafood restaurant in the heart of Sag Harbor. Veteran chef/co-owner Eric Miller has created a menu based on seasonal, locally sourced ingredients. Don’t miss the lobster roll on a toasted potato bun, and the succulent day boat scallops served with beans, corn and vegetable succotash. The dishes are generous and reasonably priced. 631-725-6246, www. madisonandmainrestaurant.com. September - October 2013

American Ballet Theater’s 2013 Fall Season at Lincoln Center

Les Sylphides - Photo:Rosalie O’Connor.

The American Ballet Theater’s 2013 fall season starts with an opening night gala on October 30 at the David H. Koch Theater. Highlights of the season include the world premiere of The Tempest by Alexei Ratmansky and revivals of Twyla Tharp’s Bach Partita, Michael Fokine’s Les Sylphides, Mark Morris’ Gong and Stanton Welch’s Clear. Showing through November 10. For tickets call 212-496-0600 or visit www.abt.org.

A Christmas Story, The Musical at the Theater at Madison Square Garden A Christmas Story, The Musical will play at the Theater at Madison Square Garden from December 11 to 29. The 2013 Tony Award nominated musical is based on the popular holiday movie A Christmas Story. For tickets call 866-858-0008 or visit www.AChristmasStoryTheMusical.com.

Magritte Exhibition at MOMA The Museum of Modern Art presents Magritte: The Mystery of the Ordinary, 1926–1938, an exhibition focusing on René Magritte’s surrealist years. It showcases around 80 paintings, collages, and objects, along with a selection of photographs, periodicals, and early commercial work. On view from September 28, through January 12, 2014. www.moma.org.

The NY City Opera Opens Season with Anna Nicole The New York City Opera opens its 2013–14 season with the U.S. premiere of Anna Nicole, a colossal co-production with BAM. The opera is based on the flamboyant life and tragic death of Anna Nicole Smith. At the BAM Howard Gilman Opera House. September 17-28. Tickets at 718.636.4100, www.nycopera.org.

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Serving Breakfast, Lunch, Dinner Early Bird Specials $12.95, 4pm - 6pm Daily Champagne Brunch

Sat, Sun, & Holidays 12noon - 4pm

Weekend Entertainment Catering

Rib Eye Steak

Dining at Continental

Green Kitchen — 7000 Blvd. East, Guttenberg (at the Galaxy). A casual restaurant offering continental fare, home made desserts, and friendly service. Serving breakfast, lunch and dinner. Open Mon-Thurs, Sun 7am11:30pm; Fri, Sat 7am-12:30pm. Early bird specials $1295 from 4pm-6pm daily. Weekend Entertainment in the @green bar/ lounge: (Friday) Karaoke, (Saturday) DJ spins from 10pm-2am. Champagne Brunch on Sat, Sun, & Holidays from noon-4pm. Free local delivery. Free 4 hour parking in the Galaxy garage. Catering for private events. Visit www.greenkitchenrestaurant.com. 201-868-4627.

Fresh Salmon

201-868-4627

7000 Blvd East • Guttenberg (at the Galaxy) • Free Parking

www.greenkitchenrestaurant.com

Italian

Café Italiano — 14 Sylvan Ave., Englewood Cliffs. The restaurant occupies the historic home of flamboyant 1920s NYC mayor, Jimmy Walker. The turn of the century

Celebrating our 18 th Year Anniversary!

RISTORANTE of DUMONT

Authentic Italian homestyle cooking with the finest ingredients. “Excellent” HHH — The Record

Turkish - Middle Eastern Restaurant

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Open 201-384-7767 7 days www.njdiningguide.com/ilmulino

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178 Piermont Rd. Cresskill September - October 2013

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Newly Renovated Dining Room and Party Room Bar/Bat Mitzvahs Private Room Full Bar Catering Delivery Take Out

Jim Lulani,

formerly of Cafe Italiano, celebrates 14 years at Il Mulino

Continental Cuisine

Its Best

Europe Cafe & Grill Mediterranean - Turkish Cuisine

architecture, combined with the fine Italian cuisine makes for a memorable dining experience. The menu features great selections, large portions and affordable prices. From the hot and cold appetizers, to the pastas, risottos, chicken, veal, seafood, beef and lamb entrees, you will find every item uniquely prepared and presented. End your meal with a cappuccino or sinful dessert. A wine list at fair prices is also offered. Open 7 days for Lunch and Dinner. Available for private parties of up to 100 people. Ample Parking. Call 201-461-5041. Il Mulino — 132 Veterans Plaza, Dumont. Voted One of the Most Popular Italian Restaurants in All of Bergen County by top vote-getters from various magazines and newspapers. Mondays thru Thursdays from 5 to 6 pm the “Sunset Dinner” includes an appetizer, choice of soup or salad, entrée, fresh fruit and coffee or tea for $1395 - $1995. BYOB. Owner Jimmy, will take care of you. Open 7 days for lunch and dinner. Party room up to 120. Visit www.njdiningguide.com/ilmulino or call 201-384-7767.

Mediterranean

Europe Cafe & Grill — One Highwood Ave., Tenafly. This cozy restaurant serves Mediterranean and Turkish dishes. The menu includes tantalizing appetizers, Pide, (a thin crust pizza with toppings), vegetarian, seafood, grilled meats and chicken, and other specialties. Daily 3 course lunch for $12 from 11am-2:30pm, and Saturday and Sunday 3-course for $21 from 11am-5pm. BYOB, takeout, and local deliveries. 201-569-4444.

Turkish - Middle Eastern

Samdan — 178 Piermont Rd., Cresskill. This casual, elegant restaurant has won the hearts of area residents and food critics alike. Samdan offers mouth-watering appetizers, kebabs, a large selection of Turkish delights along with regional delicacies and daily specials. Lunch Specials Mon-Sat $1195, Early Bird Special Mon-Fri 4-6pm, 4 courses plus coffee $2195. Open 7 days. Sun-Thurs noon-10pm, Fri-Sat noon-10:30pm. Full bar, Catering, Party Room for 80-100 people. www.samdanrestaurant.com. 201-816-7343.

Grill • Seafood • Vegetarian Specialty Foods BYOB • Takeout • Local Delivery

15% Off

Lunch Special 3 Course $12 11am -2 pm 30

Entire Bill

With ad. Exp 10/31/13

201-569-4444 One Highwood Ave. • Tenafly

Enjoy Al Fresco Dining at

Cafe Italiano & ristorante

bar

Uncompromising Quality Generous Portions at Great Prices Private Party Rooms Available to Fit Any Budget — Call Danny TOP 10 Pick

by The Record 2002

“Among the Best in New Jersey” — Zagat Survey Readers’ Choice Award NJ Savvy Living

Daily Sunset Dinner

Four Course Prix Fixe $1395-$1995 Mon-Fri 4pm-6pm • Sun 1pm-3pm

201-461-5041 • Open 7 days 14 Sylvan Ave. • Englewood Cliffs Hi Class Living

Enjoy Summer Fun All Year Round! With New York City Pleasures 15 Minutes From Your Door

AT THE GALAXY

Huge Indoor Pool • Outdoor Pool • Health Club • Tennis • Restaurants • Bank • Market

Studios, 1, 2, 3 Bedrooms and Penthouse Condominiums Available for Sale or Rent. Corporate Leasing and Relocation.

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Helene S. Feldan, Pres.

SALES • LEASING • MANAGEMENT

Hi Rises • Single & Multi-Family Homes • Townhouses •201-861-6777

September - October 2013

Joan and Bob Oppenheimer of

OPERTIES RE/MAX FORTUNE PR Englewood Cliffs

Fort Lee Bluff

on Mediterranean colonial son Personalized & Hud and NY h wit fs clif the e acr f Professional hal rare a River views on t Lee For s Services iou stig pre the in lot m, roo g livin Bluff. Features rmet Licensed in formal dining room, gou h wit hen kitc New Jersey and granite island ms, roo bed 4 m, roo New York ast akf bre levels), (master bedrooms on 2 New York views. Serving terraces with wonderful 2.5 baths, and outdoor ction with full beam top quality constru Bergen County el ste and cco stu te, ed Concre is set back on a seclud nce ide res tely sta and Manhattan s Thi . height basement e. Classic luxury. driv r ula circ ate priv a h lot wit 201-816-8889 , Englewood Cliffs • 474 Sylvan Ave.(9W) www.realty201.com 224-2517(eve.)

201-

friedberg

properties & associates

ENGLEWOOD – CAMELOT

The crown jewel of Englewood’s Great Estates is this gracious chateau set on 3 park-like acres featuring an English garden and outdoor entertaining area. The slate-roofed beauty is flanked by a carriage house on one side and an oversized pool on the other. Living room enjoys a marble fireplace and crown moldings. Banquet size dining room offers a fireplace and French doors to a summer porch. An elevator accesses the upper level and a stunning master suite with fireplace, dressing room and marble Jacuzzi bath. 201-768-6868

Alpine/Closter

201-894-1234

Tenafly

201-871-0800

Cresskill 79

201-666-0777

River Vale

201-568-1818

Englewood Cliffs Hi Class Living

M.N.R. Promotions Inc. 120 Sylvan Avenue, Suite 209 Englewood Cliffs, NJ 07632 201-363-0200

Presorted Standard Mail U.S. Postage PAID Permit #5377 Denver, CO

Michele Kolsky-Assatly and Michael Kolsky Selling One Dream at a Time

DEMAREST

This magnificent 12,000 sq.ft. showhouse, built by Distaulo, is located in a beautiful section of Demarest. It is one of the finest homes ever built in the area. $350,000 was spent on landscaping alone. Highlights of this incredible home include huge rooms, hardwood floors throughout, gorgeous 2 story entry foyer, chef’s kitchen, master suite with fireplace/ sitting room/his and her closets/stunning bath, mahogany library, large upstairs bonus room offering many possibilities. Luxury at its finest - a must see! $3,425,000.

6 Bedrooms, 5 full and 3 half Baths

Currently under construction this exceptional stone and cedar shake Greenwich style luxury home was designed by Robert Zampolin and is being built by Rock Ridge. 10,500 square feet of finished space will feature extensive moldings and trim work, elevator to all levels, great room, gourmet kitchen, library, media room and incredible master suite with balcony overlooking the 1.8 acre manicured property. Additional highlights include covered rear patio, pool with spa and 3 car garage. $5,395,000.

6 bedrooms 7 full and 2 half baths.

201-944-6583 (office) • 201-310-6136 www.michelekolsky.com

Specializing in Luxury Homes, Condos, Co-ops, Townhouses, Land and Estates in Bergen County

Michael Kolsky Realtor

realtor

Michele Kolsky-Assatly Realtor