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Education
Spotlight Born with the rare genetic disease tuberous sclerosis, Bowen Brant had benign tumors growing on his heart, brain and other vital organs. Brain tumors took the biggest toll, sparking epilepsy around age 1. The Indianapolis boy underwent five brain surgeries in two years and was eventually diagnosed with autism. “It’s taken a huge toll on his development,” says his mother, Kim. “After we got the seizures under control, we needed to pursue a new way for him to learn.” Kim and her husband, Jay, found Access in Indianapolis thanks to a Facebook group geared toward special needs. In October, they enrolled Bowen in full-time therapy and are thrilled with his remarkable progress. “Access has turned a dark situation into one of promise,” Jay says. Access specializes in Applied Behavior Analysis, a widely recognized and effective treatment for autism and other diagnoses. “We knew ABA therapy was an option, but didn’t know much about it,” Kim says. “We’d toured other facilities, but when we left Access, we were very confident this was the best place for our family. They’d help Bowen meet his potential. Meeting Alysia and touring Access provided us with hope, and we could tell they were passionate.” Access President Alysia Fuhrmann, a board-certified Behavior Analyst, oversees Bowen’s care. “Our goal is to help the family reach their goals, so they can enjoy quality of life,” Fuhrmann says. “We can teach in any environment and cater to each family’s needs.” Jay says they felt a massive sense of relief after visiting Access. “It just felt right. That’s a huge understatement,” he says. “For us, the other places didn’t feel personal or comfortable. We feel really good leaving our son, who’s never been out of our watch, to spend the day with this group of wonderful people. They offer to work with
our extended family, babysitters — they address the whole family.” Bowen, who just turned 3, spends three full and two partial days learning at the clinic. “Before, he wasn’t talking, his motor skills weren’t great — he was behind on just about everything,” Kim says. “Recently, he’s started mimicking sounds, which is a great first step.” Fuhrmann says Bowen’s limited communication skills frustrated the toddler, so his therapists first taught Bowen more sign language. They’re also working on his vocal language, and addressing his repetitive behaviors by teaching Bowen how to properly play. “He’s making progress very quickly,” Fuhrmann says. Jay says it’s important to understand it’s a process that’s not going to happen overnight. “They get so excited at Access about Bowen’s achievements, no matter how small,” Jay says. “That gives us perspective.” Bowen recently made a new sound when Kim asked one morning if he was ready to go to school at Access. “He started making the ‘shh’ sound,” Kim says proudly. “They throw him a party at Access every time he accomplishes something. He truly loves it there.” Now, it’s Kim’s turn to throw a party. While Bowen still attends horseback therapy and his First Step therapy sessions, the Brants say his time at Access has been the most beneficial, despite initial doubts the therapists could achieve the six-month goals they set. “We looked at the timeline and I kind of laughed,” Kim says. “I told them I’d throw a party if they achieved those goals. I guess I better get planning!” by Brittany Paris
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Reading Helps Develop Language Reading grows your child’s brain. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that parents read to their children from birth. Thirty minutes every day is ideal; however, if thirty minutes at one time does not work for your family, try reading ten minutes at a time, three times during the day. Reading to your child can improve language skills and future academic success in reading, math, and science. Here are some useful tips when you are reading with your young child: • Go to your local library and let your child choose books that look interesting to them. • Talk about the pictures. You can talk about what the characters are doing, as well as what colors, shapes, numbers, and objects you see on the pages. • Expand your child’s language. If they 4
point to a picture of a dog and say, “Dog”, talk about what the dog is doing. For example, you could say, “The brown dog is eating.” • Use an animated voice to build suspense and interest while reading. Also, books with flaps or pictures that slide are great for creating anticipation. • Use your finger to track the text while reading. • Connect the story to your child’s own experiences if possible. This will help your child understand the concepts better. • Ask open-ended questions such as, “What do you think will happen next?” • Ask comprehension questions like, “What happened at the beginning of the story?” • To extend learning, act out the story after you read the book. • Most importantly, have fun! Katherine Reid, M.A., CED Early Intervention Therapist St. Joseph Institute for the Deaf
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Why did we choose Jerry Hansman’s Okinawan Karate? Wren needed a new opportunity to express her energy, creativity, and desire to learn. Sensei Jerry Hansman’s dojo greatly exceeded our expectations. Since joining the dojo, Wren has increased her strength, balance, and coordination. Breaking boards is at the top of her “most fun things” to do list and she knows from Sensei what it means to be healthy. We are very impressed watching Wren call out blocks, kicks, and stances in Japanese during her lessons. Her sense of awareness and responsibility have greatly improved along with the pride she feels when she accomplishes her katas. Life
lessons are entwined into each session and include everything from stranger danger to self-discipline. Goal setting becomes natural for karate students. The belt system creates consistent training, a sense of accomplishment when completed, and visually indicates the student’s level of performance to their peers. These are the basics of goal setting and Wren will use the same techniques throughout life. Sensei Jerry is a respected teacher and motivator for Wren and our family and his lessons travel out of the dojo and into our daily lives. Below is a picture after Wren’s first belt ceremony.
Wren
The Upchurch Family!
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Monday Thru Sunday Multiple Days
Jim Dandy Family Restaurant Kids’ 5 and under eat free 2301 Conner St.773-3288 Noblesville PaPa Roux 8950 E. 10th Indy 603-9861 Nightly after 4 Perkins 250 Noble Creek Dr. Noblesville Monday Thru Wednesday 4 to close 776-2800 Barley Island Brewing Co. 630 Conner St.Noblesville 770-5280 Tuesday and Wednesday Quizno’s 14300 Mundy Dr Noblesville 7 days a week 4 to close dine in only 773-7041 The Original Pancake House 3 Free Pancakes for children 7 and under with adult entrée purchase Monday through Sunday at Noblesville, Fishers, and Indianaopolis locations Tucanos Brazilian Grill Noblesville Kids 7 and younger eat free everyday. Chef Mikes Charcoal Grill 102 Woodland Dr Indy Kids 5 and Younger eat for 99 cents Wuzzlers Grill and Spoon Greenwood 884-9468 Kids eat free w. adult meal Monday-Friday
Monday
Chick Fil-A 3360 W. 86th St. The Pyramids, Indy 871-5330 Mexico City Grill Emerson Ave Indy and Fishers In. Free kids meal with adult meal. Roscoe’s Taco’s Greenwood Kids meal free with Minimum $6 adult meal. Mexico City Grill Fishers 11653 Fishers Station Rd 577-1900 Mexican City Grill Indy 8028 S. Emerson Ave 884-4901 Castlers Kitchen and Bar 11501 Geist Pavilion Dr.596-9810 Fishers 5-9 Texas Road House Fishers 12950 Publishers Dr. 585-5020 Family Night 1.99 Kid’s Meal Culvers Kids NightFishers 96th St Every Monday, 5:30-8:30 pm and Indy 71st and Georgetown – Every Monday, 5:30 – 8:30 pm
Face Painting Balloons and Clowns Tuesday
All area Fazoli’s 99cent Kids meals Tuesday evenings 5-8 call for details. MacKenzie River Pizza Carmel and 82nd St Castleton 564-4211 and 288-0609 Scotty’s Brewhouse 3905 E. 96th Street Indianapolis, IN & 1 Virginia Avenue, Indianapolis, IN 46204 CR Heroes 10570 E. 96th St. Fishers 576-1070 5-p Face Painting & Balloon Animals Cancun 6714 E 82nd St, Indianapolis 578-7054 Chick Fil A Avon Rt 36 Tuesday the 8th is Courtesy Night from 5:30-7:30 Chick Fil A Noblesville Family Night First Tuesday of each Month from 5-8pm 773-4100 Chick Fil A Carmel 14647 US 31 North Family Night each Tuesday from 5-8pm 815-9465 Hellas Café 8501 Westfield Blvd 257-6211 Indy Champps Indy Northside 8711 N. River Crossing Blvd. 2 children eat free with 1 adult meal all day Tuesday Bob Evans’ Family Night from DJ 6-8pm One kid eats free with adult meal purchase. Greenwood In Perkin’s Castleton East 82nd St. Indy 842-9447 4-9 Joe’s Shelby St. Diner Indy 783-9590 6
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ily Tuesday Con't. Fam ht Cheese Burger In Paradise South Indy 883-4386 Nig & ree Patriot Grill Restaurant 1265 N. Madison Greenwood 851-8252 Kid’s Eat Free and Magician at F E Teddy’s Burger Joint 222W.Southport Rd Indy 893-2791 s Kid Con’t. Thr3e Wise Men Brewery 1021 Broad Ripple Ave Indy 255-5151 Max and Erma’s Carmel and Greenwood 705-3988 and 882-4477 Max and Erma’s Carmel Free Kids Meal with adult meal. Panda Express 17055 Geist Pavilion Dr. Fishers 5-9, 770-9684 Bob Evans all area locations. Kid’s meal free with adult meal. Teddy’s Burger Joint Southport Rd. Free kids meal w/ adult meal 5 to 9 evening. Chili’s Grill and Bar Greenwood & E 82nd St. Two free kid’s meal with each adult meal. Joe’s Shelby St Diner 783-9590 One kids meal free with adult purchase 5 to close. Thr3e Wise Men Brewery Broad Ripple Kids eat free on Tuesday with VIP Club Membership. Detour American Grill Fishers In. Kids Eat Free with adult Meal Tuesday and Thursday.
Wednesday
Michaelangelo’s 550 Westfield Rd Noblesville Kids Eat Free 773-6066 Johnny Rockets Greenwood Mall and Castleton Mall 881-6240 and 578-8015 5 to 9 Barley Island Brewing Co. Noblesville In Free Kids Meal with Adult meal Wednesday and Thursday Johnny Rockets Castleton Mall Kids meal free with each adult meal 5 to 9 Continued Page 8
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ily Fam ht Thursday g Ni Johnny Carino’s Greenwood 885-5735 & ree Barley Island Brewing Co. Noblesville Free Kids Meal with Adult meal Wednesday & Thursday at F . Detour American Grill Fishers In Kids Eat Free with adult Meal Tuesday & Thursday. E s d i K Con’t Johnny Carinos Greenwood Kids meal free with adult meal. Culvers Kids Night Noblesville – Every Thursday, 5:30 - 8:30 pm
Face Painting Balloons and Clowns Friday
Illinois Street Food Emporium Indy Free kids meal with each adult meal 4 to close Skyline Chili Indy Locations Kids meal 99 cents 5 to close.
Saturday
Steak N Shake all Indianapolis locations Chick Fil A Avon Rt 36 Indianapolis Indianas Victory Field Kids Eat Free with at least an $8 purchase.
Sunday
Scotty’s Brewhouse 3905 E. 96th Street Indianapolis, IN & 1 Virginia Avenue, Indianapolis, IN 46204 Granite City Food and Brewery 150 W. 96th St Carmel 218-7185 5-9 Magician 5-8 Grindstone Charley’s Rockville Rd and Crawfordsville Rd’s Indy 243-8760 and 481-1870 Steak N Shake all Indianapolis locations Rock Star Pizza 922 E. Main St. Brownsburg 858-1188 all day dine in Only Indianapolis Indianas Victory Field Kids Eat Free with at least an $8 purchase. Books and Brew 9402 Upton Dr Suite 1400 Free Kids meal w/ Adult Purchase Grand Junction Brewing Westfield Free kids Meal with Adult Meal (Please call ahead to verify details)
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Our daughter, Taite, was soon to be nine years old. We knew that her little ways about her weren’t going to be so “cute” to classmates and others the older she got. She lacked social adequacies, was a loner, had a poor attention span, low vocabulary, and struggled to comprehend school work. She was immature for her age, failed to participate in activities, and wouldn’t answer questions nor ask many herself. Medication was never an option for us. It was soon revealed to us that the Brain Balance program was the only program that could produce a change in our daughter and not merely cover up symptoms. The Brain Balance program would actually change our daughter’s brain and strengthen the weak areas, using a natural approach that included cognitive, sensory, physical and nutritional work. Once we enrolled in the program, she began to talk more, ask questions, participate, and she seemed more awake to the world around her. Her attention span grew within a short amount of time and physically, we could tell she felt better. Through the course of the program, Taite’s academics continued to improve substantially. She was reading better, holding her attention, understanding and completing math problems, writing clear sentences, and completing her in-class tests and school work without assistance. We are convinced that there is no way our daughter could have made this amount of progress in this short amount of time without the Brain Balance program. To-date, we continue to see improvements in Taite’s socialization, academics, vocabulary and sentences, as well as she seems to be more aware of others and what is going on around her. The Brain Balance program gave us answers, direction, instruction, assistance, and knowledge to help our daughter. It was a privilege to provide the Brain Balance program to her!
Taite’s Story
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Summer Study Fun Yes, I know putting the words – summer, fun & study – together seems like an error, but don’t knock it if you haven’t tried it! We all want our kids to enjoy time off from school; however, this enjoyment can come at a high price. Multiple studies have confirmed that children lose an average of 25% of their skills during the summer. Teachers spend at least the first month of the school year reviewing. Whether your child experienced learning challenges or not, summer loss is a real concern. But fortunately, the summer is a perfect time to reinforce learning skills. There are no grades! There are no tests! There is no competition! One and one half hours per week for eight weeks can give your child an educational boost. This summer, in addition to our regular sessions in math and reading, we will offer special sessions addressing Organizational & Study Skills, Kindergarten Readiness, Cursive Writing, and Cognitive Skills.
• Kindergarten Readiness is (obviously) for children about to enter Kindergarten. • Cursive Writing is offered to any child who has completed first through fifth grades. • Organizational & Study Skills is for children who have completed second through fifth grades. • Cognitive Skills is for those children whom parents suspect might be experiencing some learning disabilities. The special summer sessions begin Monday, June 6 and end Thursday, July 28. Each class will be held twice weekly Visit our Facebook page, www.facebook. com/jnrtutoring, to read a complete description of each of these sessions with pricing, or you may call j&R Tutoring Academy of Indiana at 317-601-4182. Join us this summer for study fun!
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ABC Proudly Offers In-House Training and Certification for All New Staff Do you have a heart for children and teens with special needs? Are you looking for a career that allows you to truly make a difference every day? At The Applied Behavior Center for Autism, we pride ourselves on our extensive in-house training and certification programs that allow our new employees to grow and excel within this exciting and growing field. If you have the heart for this industry, we have the ability to train you and teach you to work in this field. Making a Difference Every Day At ABC, our employees find more than a career; they find a calling. Each day, our staff works hard to make a tangible difference in the lives of children and teens with special needs. Our therapists form a strong bond with our patients and together, we work toward and celebrate milestones in the lives of our patients. “This job is unlike anything else in the world,” said Sara Clark, BCaBA. “You might feel like you have a tough day one day and then the very next day, you meet with parents and they tell you that their child gave them a hug for the very first time or they responded when their sibling said their name for the first time. It’s moments like that that make this job special. When you work here, things are constantly being put into perspective for you. You are constantly reminded why you are here and why what you are doing really and truly matters.” New Training Program ABC is proud to offer our newest program which is an in-house training that prepares our therapy staff to receive the credential of Registered Behavior Technician (RBT). This is the newest credential offered by The Behavior Analyst Certification Board's (BACB). The training for this certification is provided free-of-charge to all incoming employees. RBTs are trained and qualified paraprofessionals that are responsible for the direct implementation of behavior analytic programs and interventions
written by Board Certified Behavior Analysts (BCBAs) and/or Board Certified Assistant Behavior Analysts (BCaBAs). To become an RBT, the individual must complete 40 hours of training in behavior analysis. Then they must pass both a practical Competency Assessment with a BCBA or BCaBA and a written test maintained by the BACB. After obtaining their credential as an RBT, the RBT may only practice under the direct supervision of a BCBA or BCaBA. The BACB outlines several supervision standards and requirements for RBTs to ensure that consumers receive quality services. The Applied Behavior Center for Autism values this newest credential offered by the BACB and recognizes that it provides more credibility and strength to the services that we provide. The RBT credential gives our patients a way of knowing that their direct care staff typically referred to as ABA therapists - have received adequate training in our field and are qualified to deliver our services correctly and effectively. Position Requirements To be considered for the new RBT position, applicants must be at least 18 years of age with a high school diploma. College degrees and previous experience with children are preferred but not required. Applicants must have a positive attitude and strong communication skills. After being hired, employees must be First Aide trained and CPR certified. (We provide these trainings). How to Apply Are you interested in a career that changes lives? To apply today, applicants can email resumes to employment@appliedbehaviorcenter. org or visit our website to fill out our online job application (www. appliedbehaviorcenter.org). The Applied Behavior Center for Autism: Find a Career. Change a Life. Discover Your Purpose.
To inquire about services, call us at 317-849-KIDS or visit our website at www.AppliedBehaviorCenter.org. Please say “I found it in the IndyKids’Directory!” Thanks!
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Proud Sponsors of Resources for Special Needs Children Access Behavioral Solutions Clinic Pg 2 www.accessbehavioralsolutions.com Info@accessbehavioralsolutions.com 317.802.7447 Access Behavioral Solutions is making ABA services available by bringing the therapy to you- in your home, in your community, or in the clinic. Applied Behavior Center for Autism Pgs 14, 15 & 28 www.appliedbehaviorcenter.org ABC for Autism is proud to be Indiana’s largest and longest running ABA therapy provider. With 7 locations statewide (Indy North, Early Childhood Center, Indy West, Greenwood, Richmond, Terre Haute and Carmel), ABC provides one-onone individualized programming in the areas of ABA therapy, behavior consulting, speech therapy, occupational therapy and special needs swim lessons for ages 2 and older.
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Brain Balance Pg 9 www.brainbalanceindy.com 317.843.9200 9510 N. Meridian St., Indianapolis Brain Balance’s Program has changed the lives of kids suffering with ADHD, learning disorders and behavioral issues. We integrate cognitive, sensory-motor and nutritional training into a highly effective, drugfree program that targets your child’s specific challenges. Natural Valley Ranch Pg 17pg. 7 www.NaturalValleyRanch.com www.NaturalValleyTherapeuticRiding.org Marie@NaturalValleyRanch.com 317-509-3577 Birthday Parties, Trail Rides, Lessons, Petting Zoo Hayride/Bonfire, Therapeutic Riding St. Joseph Institute for the Deaf Pg 4 www.sjid.org 317.471.8560 Leaders in Listening and Spoken Language. Supervision Infrared Sauna SupervisionWeightLoss.com 317-849-8446 For treatment of autism.
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See pg 18 See pg 8
See pg 21
See pg 19
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See pg 17
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March 2016 February 19 – March 19 Beef and Boards presents Live Theater for Kids “Junie B. Jones: The Musical” Each musical is one hour long with no intermission and includes a juice and snack. www.beefandboards.com Friday, March 4 – Friday, March 11 Spring Bulb Show at Garfield Park Conservatory and Gardens. It’s springtime at the Garfield Conservatory! Come see our stunning display of tulips and other spring blooms against the backdrop of our permanent tropical collection. Bulbs from the show will be for sale beginning March 14 at 10 am. Saturday, March 5, 8:30am 500 Festival Miler Series – 6 Miler at One NCAA Plaza. The 500 Festival Miler Series, presented by OrthoIndy, consists of three running and walking events offered at three unique distances, a 3-Miler, 6-Miler, and 10-Miler. The series coincides with typical training programs geared toward a spring race. The 500 Festival Miler Series, presented by OrthoIndy is the perfect, low-pressure opportunity for participants to gauge their progression in preparation for the 2016 OneAmerica 500 Festival Mini-Marathon or a spring distance race of their choice. Not training for a race? These events also provide an opportunity to get moving and accomplish your 2016 fitness goals. - See more at: http://www.500festival.com/6Miler#sthash. uTGHSiIS.dpuf Saturday, March 5, 1:00pm Punch and Judy at Peewinkle’s Puppet Studio. A classic hand puppet show presented by punchman Guy Thompson. His shows have been big hits at the Fisher's Renaissance Faire and many other family festivals. It'll have your youngsters laughing throughout! Perfect live entertainment for the whole family. Thursday, March 10 – Sunday, March 13 Big Ten Men’s Basketball Tournament at Bankers Life Fieldhouse. The countdown is underway to another celebration of Big Ten Basketball. The 2016 Big Ten Men's Basketball Tournament returns to the hoops capital of Indianapolis and the world's finest basketball facility at Bankers Life Fieldhouse. Saturday, March 12, 10:00am Disney’s Choo-Choo Soul The Center for the Performing Arts in Carmel. Imagine soulful and current renditions of the ABC’s, 1-2-3’s, and learning how to be polite. Imagine a diverse and incredibly hip duo, teaching children through music on an animated train.... and Choo-Choo Soul is born! This live stage show is created from the Disney Channel’s Choo-Choo
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Soul with Genevieve! program, which has been honored with a Parents Choice Award for Children’s television. The music is contagious and soulful, with a focus on trains and learning. Genevieve stars as the Train Conductor assisted by DC, her beatboxing, breakdancing engineer. Saturday, March 12 – Sunday, March 20 Indiana Flower & Patio Show at Indiana State Fairgrounds. The 57th edition of the Indiana Flower & Patio Show will be having a field of flowers, gardening products & patios. There is truly something for everyone! Indoors and out, construction to design, economical to lavish… you’ll find something that fits you! Saturday, March 12 – Sunday, March 13 at Indiana State Fairgrounds. Brickworld is your original LEGO exposition featuring the local artists and engineers of the Indiana LEGO User Group. They will fill the 45,000 square feet of the Ag/Hort Building with millions of LEGO bricks and incredible creations. Don't miss out on the fun! Wednesday, March 16, 5:00 Greening of the Canal Downtown Indianapolis. Put on your greenest green outfit and join us for live music, dancing, special celebrity appearances and a whole lot of St. Paddy’s Day fun. The highlight of the event is the dying of the canal, but you'll also enjoy prize drawings, authentic Irish entertainment by Eunan McIntyre, free shamrock necklaces and hats, and more! Thursday, March 17, 11:30am St. Patrick’s Day Parade and Street Festival Downtown Indianapolis. The 36th Annual St. Patrick’s Day Parade Presented by Hoosier Lottery starts at 11:30 am. The parade is made up of high school bands, floats, catholic schools, Irish dancers, bag pipe & drum bands, Irish organizations and dignitaries. The parade also hosts a festival from 10 am-3 pm on Vermont Street with live entertainment, food, interactive displays and beer garden located in the middle of the parade route. Come out rain or shine and enjoy one of Indy’s most popular events. Saturday, March 19, 9:15pm Laughing Matters with Seth Meyers at Hilbert Circle Theatre. Cancer Support Community Central Indiana (CSC) will welcome Emmy Award winning writer, comedian and “Late Night” host Seth Meyers as headliner for the 16th annual comedy fundraiser Laughing Matters. Meyers was named one of the 2014 TIME 100, Time magazine’s 100 most influential people. Meyers also hosted the 66th Primetime Emmy Awards.
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Fun Events Saturday, March 19 Elegant Vintages Annual International Wine Auction at Conrad Indianapolis. If you're a cognoscente of fine wines, you won't want to miss the eighteenth annual Elegant Vintages International Wine Auction presented by Fifth Third Private Bank.All of the proceeds from this amazing evening help fund the care and feeding of more than 1,600 animals and 23,000 plants in the collection at the Indianapolis Zoo. Featuring selections of fine and rare wine from around the world, this elegant, black-tie optional event includes both live and silent auctions. Auction lots often include many non-wine items such as unique gift packages, magnificent dinners, luxury get-aways, fine jewelry, original art, sports memorabilia, oneof-a-kind sculptures, behind-the-scenes tours at the Zoo and more! Each year, guests enjoy a multi-course gourmet dinner paired with exquisite wines and live entertainment following the auction. Thursday, March 24, 7:30pm Boyz II Men at The Center for the Performing Arts in Carmel. Boyz II Men remains one of the most truly iconic R&B groups in music history. The group redefined popular R&B and continues to create timeless hits that appeal to fans
across all generations. Recently celebrating their 20th anniversary this year, the band has penned and performed some of the most celebrated classics of the past two decades. Tuesday, March 29 – Sunday, April 3 Pinewood Derby at Indiana State Museum in White River State Park. On your mark, get set… for the second greatest spectacle in racing! The Indiana State Museum and Boy Scouts of America, Crossroads of America Council invite you to race your derby cars and watch as they zip down the two-story, 125-feet of track, across the finish line. The track will be open to the public all week with the official race on Saturday, April 2. All participating cars must be registered by 1 p.m. on race day. Enter a derby car by 2 p.m. for the ‘Best of Show’ competition. Cars will be awarded based on visual design. The track will continue to be open for Fun Runs on Sunday. Visit indianamuseum. org to view the Saturday competition rules and ‘Best of Show’ categories. If you would like your event included in our monthly calendars, submit it by going to wwwIndyKidsDirectory.com.
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Use Compassionate Parenting in Tough Situations Kids are so precious. If you are reading this, it is likely that you want to devour information about your children because you realize that it is all trial and error and that you need as much support as you can to raise them to be strong healthy adults. The truth of the matter is that it takes a keen awareness of what they are doing to provide them with the best supervision imaginable. This can be a daunting task when there are so many tasks in a day and so many things to oversee and attend to as you navigate through your daily routine with your children.
has been exposed to something that is wrong or unhealthy for them. Perhaps you found your middle child looking at images on his computer that were “rated X.” Carol Juergensen Sheets These are the kind of situations that can make you scared and worried because you are not sure how your child has been effected. TThere is no play book as to what to say or how to react.
This column is a reminder to keep it simple and give yourself permission to slow down your life. When you stay in the moment, you will likely stay aware of what your children are being exposed to and how to handle it when you find that they have experimented with things that go against your family mores and values.
Whenever you experience difficult situations, it can be helpful to use compassionate parenting regardless of the situation. If you catch your child viewing adult images, you sit them down and you tell them that it is your job to protect their brain and the things that they were looking at were not safe or healthy for growing brains and so you will need to help with monitoring them to keep them safe. You don’t necessarily want to shame them because it is normal and natural to be curious about seeing things they have never seen before. You tell them that a good rule of thumb for whether they should be doing something is whether they would look at that stuff with Mommy or Daddy in the room. They may not answer you, but they know instinctively that it feels wrong. You have taught them that although you understand their fascination, you want them to be guided by their own internal sense of right or wrong. You then explain that you are going to put controls on the tablet to make sure things are safe and you will be checking in from time to time to “protect their brains.”
Keep it simple Yes, I know there is a lot of pressure to provide your children with the many opportunities to “broaden their horizons” in sports, academics, and social situations, but in the time they spend with you is far more valuable so give yourself permission to say no to many of the outside activities and find ways of cuddling up with them on the couch or laying on their bed when they are working on their tablet and just be with them. They need your presence because ultimately they are going to want to experiment with things that you need to be aware of so that you can help them make the right decisions. Use compassionate parenting in difficult situations It is not uncommon for parents to get really scared when they find out that their child
Sending clear messages without using shame is always the best choice.
Carol Juergensen Sheets LCSW PCC is a psychotherapist and personal life coach. She does motivational speaking and empowerment trainings locally and nationally. To find out more about her services--contact her at www.carolthecoach.com or call her at 317-218-3479. 26
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