In Fashion February 2011

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Spring 2011

New Arrivals Daily


[How to Get the Most Out of Your Trainer: A Trainee’s Bill of Rights] By: Tanya Rosen

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will probably get killed by other trainers for this article but I am writing this to educate the consumers, the clients. I’ll also admit that some clients DO get more out of their time with me than others. Here is how to get the most out of your trainer and sessions: 1. Don’t be afraid to ask your trainer if he/she is certified, and from where! I personally always get very surprised that no one asks me about my certifications. At this point, I am working in the field for a long time so that could be why. However, even in the very beginning, hardly anyone asked. Another question along these lines is HOW the certification was obtained. Nowadays, there are so many certifications that are so easy that even a kid can take the test. A good and thorough certification will require months of studying, as well as hands-on practice, and tests. 2. Hold your trainer to the agreed upon time! If you are supposed to have a 45-minute session and your trainer shows up 7 minutes late, hold her to it. As long as you say it nicely, your trainer will have no problem making up the time whether at that session or owing it to you for next time.

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3. Ask about packages, referral programs, and discounts. Many trainers offer prepaid packages where you purchase a certain amount of sessions at a time at a rate that is prepaid, but ends up being lower than paying per session. Although you have to come up with the money, it is still cheaper in the long run. Some trainers may offer you something for referring a friend, such as a free session, or a discount. Your trainer may not tell you about these options, but ask, and take advantage of what’s available. 3. Talk or work. If you want to get the most out of your session, minimize your chatter. I do have a few clients that can get a perfect workout in and talk through the whole thing, but like I said, a few, not many. Most people get distracted and end up missing out. I am all for having a fun and social session, but try to minimize as much as possible to get the most of your workout. 4. Change is good! If you notice that your trainer is always using the same CD, or the same equipment, or the same moves, speak up. Tell her you love working out with her, but how about spicing it up a bit? When your body F a s h i o n

gets used to something, it does not react anymore. A good trainer will constantly change things up to keep you excited and motivated, and to keep your body reacting! 5. You deserve your trainer’s undivided attention. This means that the trainer should be focusing only on you. It is inappropriate for your trainer to be taking calls or texting while training you (unless it is an emergency). If you are training in a gym setting and other people are around, the trainer should only focus on you, and avoid socializing with other members in the gym. This also means that your trainer should not be using this time to get in his/ her own workout. This is YOUR workout, and he/she should be watching you and making sure you are doing it right. Good luck![IF] Tanya Rosen is the co-owner of Shape Fitness in Flatbush. As a certified and experienced Personal Trainer, Aerobics Instructor, and nutritionist, Tanya offers these three services to the community. Tanya specializes in prenatal and postnatal fitness, and is best known for her personal and caring approach towards every member of the Shape Fitness family. Tanya can be reached at (917)9131523, or (718) 338-8700.

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[ Six Basic Tips For Keeping Healthy This Winter—And Year Round] By: Shimon J. Metz, DC

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s the cold winter settles in—and this year promises to be a long, cold winter indeed—most people tend to hunker down and ride out the storms until spring finally arrives. It’s also a time when people tend to get sick with colds or flu, gain a few pounds, and feel like they have less energy. So, this issue, I thought it would be useful to impart a few basic health tips that will help make the ride through winter more healthful, as well as being useful the rest of the year. Exercise. During the winter, it’s cold, and our bodies want to conserve heat, so we tend to put on a few pounds. And since we loath to be outdoors more than necessary, we’re less active. It’s really essential to keep active to keep our bodies and minds in shape. Join a gym, buy a treadmill or indoor bike, or bundle up and get out there. Three to four times a week, 30-40 minutes each session of sustained cardio is, I believe, ideal, but anything is better than doing nothing. You can even work out 15-20 minutes twice a day for the same benefits. Hydrate. Since we’re less active, we tend to drink less, and the cold, dry outdoor air and the dry heated indoor air robs our bodies and skin of moisture. Drink lots of water and use natural moisturizers on dry, itchy skin. Sleep with a humidifier to make breathing at night more comfortable. Also, dry mucous membranes, such as 12

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on the lips or in the nose, can crack and allow viruses easier access. Use a natural lip balm or mineral oil, or Aquaphor on the lips and inside the nose. Eat Smart. We tend to like “comfort food” when it’s cold—heavy starches, fatty, fried foods, etc. An alternative that is also hearty and satisfying is soups— they’re warming to the body and full of healthy vegetables and proteins. Try and minimize simple sugar and starches like breads and cake. Also try to avoid all sodas and most juices—eat your calories, don’t drink them. Take a multivitamin that includes vitamin D, since we don’t get as much sunlight during the winter months. It’s also a good idea to take a good omega-3 supplement with DHA and EPA, in a quality fish-oil supplement. Wash Your Hands. Since we’re indoors more of the time, we tend to be around other people more and be in more contact with them; breathing air that they breathe, touching them or things that they touch. This can cause colds and flu to easily get transmitted. It’s a good idea to wash your hands frequently. You don’t need fancy antibacterial soaps—there’s evidence that they actually breed resistance and more infections, and they won’t work on cold viruses anyway. A good twenty-second scrubbing with regular soap and water is fine. Then moisturize! F a s h i o n

Sleep. This is usually not a problem for some people, especially when it gets dark early, but it is important to get at minimum 7 hours of sleep a night for adults. Make sure your sleeping room is quiet, dark, and at a comfortable temperature. Use adequate neck support, like a contoured neck pillow. Take Care of Your Other Health Needs. Don’t neglect your other health needs—see your dentist for a checkup and cleaning if you haven’t gone for a while, see your chiropractor regularly for spinal checkups and other routine care, and see your primary physician for a checkup if you haven’t in a while. Those are some basic good practices to make sure you are in good shape when spring finally arrives! Hang in there! [IF] Dr. Shimon Metz is a chiropractor with offices in Cedarhurst, NY, and has over fifteen years of experience with back and neck pain, headaches, accidents, and other painful problems. He can be reached at doctormetz@gmail.com or (516) 509-0126. Disclaimer: The above is not intended as specific medical or health advice or to replace or constitute the care of a physician. For any specific problem, you should contact your own doctor or health practitioner.

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[ Living Foods ] By: Orit Alexander Fried NC, PHD

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he human body was created with all the organs and blood vessels working in harmony and unison. It was designed to perfection, unlike manmade materials. For example, if we look at the most expensive luxurious cars that have every feature we can imagine, the manufacturers will still come up with a new feature every year because there is always room for improvement, unlike the human body. We are all born with a great gift—our bodies—and it is up to us to nurture and protect them. We have to constantly watch over and feed our bodies with the nutrients they crave because without proper nutrition, we will break down. Just like a vehicle needs to get an oil change every 3,000 miles or so to keep it from breaking down, we must constantly provide what the body needs so that it can burn its fuel correctly. 14

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How do we know what foods are good? What to eat and what not to eat? Simply put, living foods are filled with all of life’s essentials. Living foods contain live enzymes and are rich in nutrients, thus causing our blood to dance happily. Living foods are rich in energy and give oxygen to our cells. Our bodies are designed to eat living foods and all the nutrients and enzymes in the living foods nourish the human body. The old adage “you are what you eat” is very pertinent here.

of uric acid wherever lodged within the muscles.

Canned or processed food is dead food. Fried foods suffer from cell permutation and chemical modification. Boiled foods have been depleted of nutrients. These foods lower our immune system making it harder to fight off bacterial imbalances, thus making us more susceptible to disease. In fact, when we consume fried and processed junk foods, we are inviting disease to enter our life—we are welcoming Hyperbaric oxygen chambers were it in with an open door. [IF] designed to oxygenate the infirm and promote healing. The daily Orit Fried NC, PHD, is the Director dose of physical activity does quite of World of Wellness, which offers adequately in this regard. Leg an organic gourmet food delivery cramps affecting some people are program. She can be reached at known to be caused by the lack of 1845-323-1956 or via email at orit@ oxygen; the flow of which is slowed wowellness.info. at night, thus leaving the deposits

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[ The Jewish Twitterverse as a Global Community] By:Leah Helfgott

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he more I use Twitter, the more I realize its incredible power to transform the human experience, and the Jewish experience in particular. Twitter represents the democratization of the online world, where personal blogs are just as important as news sites, and where the playing field is level. Anyone who has something intelligent to say can contribute to the ongoing global conversation. It is a communication tool like no other. And it is proof that when someone is truly influential, people will listen. Twitter is quietly gaining followers across the Jewish landscape, and its impact has already been felt. For example, •Within hours of the Carmel fire breakout on December 2, Jews were tweeting links to the JNF’s Forest Fire Emergency Campaign (www.jnf. org). Within a week, JNF raised $1.5 million dollars, $700,000 of which was through online donations (www. jpost.com). •On December 30, the JTA published their second annual list of the “100 Most Influential Jewish Twitter Users.” Last year, the list was JTA’s fifth most-read article of the entire year (www.jta.org). The Jewish Twitterverse is making news! I use the term “the Jewish Twitterverse” to refer to a group of roughly 2000+

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active Jewish twitter users who regularly talk about Jewish topics. They include activists, rabbis, non-profit professionals, journalists, bloggers, artists, and moms. And they hail from all over the world and from all walks of Jewish life. What are they all talking about? Naturally, these tweeters are discussing everything important to Jews: communities, Israel, kosher food, holidays, Torah, Jewish history, news, and politics. Information is instant and flashes through Twitter like lightening. And if you follow the right people, you’ll immediately hear when something is happening in the Jewish world—whether it’s about the Maccabeats, Benyamin Netanyahu, the snow in Brooklyn, Tu B’Shvat, or that crazy wig case on People’s Court. And of course, there are personal conversations happening as well. Active users are building real relationships with each other, exchanging comments about each other’s tweets, tweeting words of encouragement, inquiring after each other’s health, and sending sincere condolences when someone announces a funeral. There are also “tweet-ups” in New York and Jerusalem—casual get-togethers so Twitter friends can meet in person. Slowly but surely, these Jews on Twitter are gelling into a world-wide Jewish community, the likes of which has never existed in our history.

media sites. Facebook is mostly about your immediate friends: people you know from high school, camp, shul, or school. But for members of the Jewish “Tweeple,” Twitter is about meeting other Jews you don’t know who share your religion, culture, and Jewish heritage. The Jewish Twitterverse is about the exchange of ideas, the issues facing Jews today, and the collective feelings of a nation. As you read the tweets of members of the “Twibe,” you’ll feel anger, pain, and resignation surrounding issues like anti-Semitism, Holocaust denial, Hamas, and Iran. But you’ll also feel the joy, the triumph, and the hopes of the Jewish People. There will be stories of Sifrei Torah returned to Jewish communities, rebbes returned from the hospital, sons returned from the IDF, and words of inspiration from Pirkei Avot. For the first time ever, Jews the world over have a chance to participate in this truly amazing experience. Registering at Twitter takes two minutes, and is surely worthwhile. Join the conversation at www. twitter.com. [IF] Leah Helfgott is the designer behind i-Point Web Design (www.i-pointwebdesign. com). She tweets as @ipointwebdesign (her business), @anshechesed (her shul in Linden, NJ), and @NewsyJewsy (her blog).

It should be noted here that, in this regard, Twitter is unique among the social F a s h i o n

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[The Truth About Wigs and Nits] By: Eve Stern

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y cell phone rings. It is 6:30 Saturday night and we’ve just finished havdalah. I quickly pick up—I can tell from the shrill ring that the call is urgent. And it is. It always is. “Can I come over right away??? My shaitel has head lice!!!” As much as I assure Elisheva that she will NOT catch lice from her shaitel and that it is probably nits and not lice, she insists that she is about to have a nervous breakdown and that she must come over. I acquiesce. Twelve minutes later there’s a knock on my door. Elisheva whizzes in, shaitel double bagged and looking ready to be thrown in the furnace. I take the shaitel, flip it upside down, and start parting the hair. I am met by dozens of tiny nits shining their insolence at Elisheva’s apparent horror. For all of you ladies starting to scratch your heads, let’s get a few facts clear! Can shaitels catch lice? Yes. Lice can crawl onto shaitels just as they can crawl onto anything else. However, a louse (that’s the

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bug) cannot survive in a shaitel for more than 48 hours. It is much more common for shaitels to have nits, which are the eggs that lice lay. The reason for this is that the women selling their hair for shaitels have long—and often lice infested—hair. Do ALL shaitels have nits? Nits in shaitels are very common. Part of the preparations of a shaitel is manually removing nits from the hair—suffice it to say that some are more scrupulous than others in their removal. Will I CATCH lice from the nits on my shaitel? No. The nits that came as a free gift with your shaitel are not viable and will not hatch. This is because the life cycle of a nit is 7-10 days before it hatches, and eggs left over longer than that are not a problem. Just so I know, what do nits look like? Nits look like tiny off white to brown sesame seeds. They are found close to the root of the hair and do not blow or flick off. F a s h i o n

So why all the buzz about nits in shaitels? Nits in shaitels are usually not contagious and the only concern with them is aesthetic. If it grosses you out to have eggs in your wig, you can section it by layer and manually remove them by hand. Or you can give me a call! Lice and nits are going around. Be aware that coats hung next to or on top of each other are a lice magnet. Keep an eye out around the nape of the neck and above the ears for small unmoving particles. This way, if there are nits in your home, you’ll nip it in the bud—or, nit it in the bug. [IF] Eve Stern is a mom who understands that women don’t want to use harmful pesticides on their kids. That’s why she started Lice Nurse—an all natural, 100% effective method of hair lice removal. Her clinicians perform school screenings and at-home lice removal. Major credit cards are welcome. Call day or night—we are here when you need us! 917-4454164; www.thelicenurse.com.

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[ How to Shape and Define Your Eyebrows ] By: Sylvia Hamowy

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akeup artists consider eyebrows and eyebrow shaping the most important facial feature. Welldefined eyebrows frame your eyes and make them appear larger. Your face will have a finished look. Brow shaping should be done before makeup is applied so that you can have a clear view of what has to be done. Using a magnifying mirror, preferably near a window, will give you a clear view of what hairs have to be removed, and more importantly, what hairs will not be touched. Working in daylight will produce a cleaner eyebrow. Keep your brows as long as possible. If you are tweezing them yourself, do not tweeze a few strays daily. One stray hair may be connected to another that hasn’t grown in yet. You won’t notice it until it is too late. If you tweeze weekly, pick a day and tweeze once a week on that day. If you have a facialist waxing your brows, be sure she is professional and that her station is immaculate. Make sure she knows which shape you want. Communication is everything. I see too many brows misshapen. The main reason for shaping is to remove unwanted hairs from your brow to create a flattering arch that enhances the eyes. Make sure that you have a clear idea of the shape you wish to achieve before picking up a pair of tweezers. Many times the hair tweezed does not grow back right or not at all. Few makeup tricks can be as good as beautifully groomed brows. Most of us have eyebrows that require some type of definition, especially as we age, to look complete.

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Applying makeup to your brows gives your eyes definition. There are many products available for darkening your brows. The first time you apply a little color you may have to get used to it. Many women use an eyebrow pencil to start and then grow into using powder or eyebrow mascara. It takes much more finesse to use a pencil and make it look like hair. I recommend a powder created especially for the eyebrows, as it looks more natural and it is easier to match than a pencil. Eyebrow stencils are available in a variety of shapes and can do wonders if you are not adept at it. I find that most pencils show up more than the powder and can become harsh. EYEBROW SHAPING TO PERFECTION Begin the eyebrow shaping process by balancing your eyebrow so it is proportionate with the rest of your face. Look in the mirror and place imaginary lines (or a pencil) from the bottom of your nose to brow. Do this on both sides of the nose. Now you know where to tweeze without making a mistake. Get as close to the root of the hair as possible. Brushing your brows before plucking will give you a better line to work with. Tweeze one hair at a time, always tweezing from underneath the brow and pull hairs in their growth direction using short quick strokes. Check your eyebrow shaping in the mirror often as you progress. There are many different types of tweezers. Trial and error will achieve the best results. When you find a tweezer you love, I F a s h i o n

suggest keeping a spare. My tweezer is very valuable to me and I guard it in the same place after each use. USING COLOR TO DEFINE BROWS Now that your eyebrows are neat and well groomed, you can lightly fill them in with color, if necessary. If you wear glasses, your brows get lost and most often need darkening. If your brow is too short, now is the time to fill it in. You can judge if your eyebrow is too short or needs more hair at the beginning (bridge) of your nose. Use light delicate strokes. If it looks too heavy, use a Q-tip to soften. YOUR ARCH SHOULD BE 2/3 OF THE WAY FROM YOUR INNER BROW! No two eyebrows are alike, just as both sides of your cheeks are different. During this eyebrow shaping phase, you can achieve as symmetrical a look as possible. Brush them into shape using an eyebrow brush. Work upward and outward to give the brow more definition. Finish your brows by using an EYEBROW SEALER to keep every hair in place. When you apply your makeup, you will reap the reward of a clean, fresh, well-defined eyebrow!! [IF]

Sylvia Hamowy is the owner of Reflections Cosmetics. She is a professional makeup artist, beauty editor, and former radio show host. She is featured in the International Who’s Who of Entrepreneurs. For more information, check out: www.reflectionscosmetics.com?

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[ The Best Colors for You ] By: Meira E. Schneider-Atik

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olor is what makes fashion into an art form for me. I cannot draw at all, but I love colors. What most of us want to know is how to find the colors that make us look our best. I have read the books that ask you about your skin tone, hair color, and eye color, and then group you into categories and give you a palette of colors. And I do not like them. First of all, I never fit neatly into any of the color categories. Second, why should I limit myself to any one palette when there are so many tints, tones, shades, saturations, values, and temperatures of color out there? Of course, with so many choices out there, it’s enough to make your head spin. Well, here is my way. Start by narrowing things down. Put a silver 30

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bracelet on one wrist and a gold one on the other wrist. If the silver bracelet looks more natural, that means that cooler-toned colors are a good place to start. If the gold one looks more natural, then warmertoned colors are better. There are some who say that fair-skinned women should go cooler and darker-skinned women should go warmer, but that is not necessarily true. Start with the bracelet trick. Next, choose a color “family” that you love and just try different shades of it near your face. Then, try other color “families.” If a color is right for you, it will give you an amazing glow and make you look awake and healthy. If a color is wrong, it will either wash you out and make you look tired, or it will be too strong and “wear you” (which means you basically notice the makeup more F a s h i o n

than the face!). Once you have the right colors, here are my rules: 1) If a color flatters you, wear it, love it, and enjoy it. 2) If a color does not flatter you, either do not wear it, or keep it away from your face and wear a more flattering color near your face. 3) Stop being afraid of color. Try on new and different colors by themselves and in combination. You will be surprised at how many great colors there are for you, and you will be surprised at how well they can work alone and with other colors. [IF]

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[Why Department Store Photography Studios Should Be Avoided:] A Fictional Interview with a Chain Store “Photographer” By: Rina Schiffman

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s a custom fine art photographer with a private studio, I wanted to share with you my thoughts on why the chain store or department store photo studios should be avoided when it’s time to take portraits of your family. I figured the best way to make my points clear would be to interrogate—I mean interview—someone who works for one of those studios. However, because I really did not think the people working there would be very willing to answer my questions, I decided the best route to take would be to conduct a fictional interview, with me asking the questions and supplying the answers. Keep in mind that while I did try to keep this fictional interview somewhat humorous, I did my best to answer the questions as truthfully as possible, with accurate information to the best of my knowledge. Steve is a 23 year old working for a popular department store photography studio chain. I caught up with him as he was leaving on his lunch break and asked if he’ d be willing to answer some questions for me. With a shrug, he agreed and we sat down on a small bench between Women’s Shoes and Outerwear.

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Me: I see. But didn’t you have to learn a lot about photography before being accepted for this job? Steve (chuckles): No way. I hate school. That’s why I dropped out in my Junior year! Actually, my boss told me during my interview that he prefers people behind the camera who don’t know much about photography. My studio manager does all the technical stuff like setting the lights and all those weird camera settings. My job is just to keep the camera and lights the way he sets them and just click the shutter button on the camera. Me: Aha. But what do you do if, say, you want a shot to have more dramatic lighting to create a certain mood? Or what if you want to use short lighting on your subject to minimize her chubby face? Steve (looking confused): We just keep the lighting the same for every person and every picture. My boss says the lighting always has to be the same. Why would we change it? And what is short lighting?? Me (groaning inwardly): Never mind. Let’s move on. So, does it cost a lot to have portraits done at the studio you work in?

Me: Thanks so much for your time, Steve. I have lots of questions but I’ll try to make it quick. First of all, do you enjoy working as a photographer here?

Steve (proudly): Not at all! In fact, with combined coupons from the local circulars, you can get forty-eight sheets of one pose for $6 .99!

Steve: Uh, not especially, but it was either this or flipping burgers at Burger King. And I’m a vegetarian, so this seemed like the better choice.

Me: Wow, that is cheap! How can you afford to be priced so low?

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Steve: Well, we can afford to be cheap because studios like ours operate on pure F a s h i o n

volume. We take tons of clients per day. (He grimaces slightly, thinking, then adds): and on really slow days, my boss makes me stand outside the store wearing a sandwich board, handing out fliers to everyone who passes. Some moms just can’t resist a great bargain and so we get some clients that way, even if they weren’t planning on taking portraits that day. Me (in shock): You mean people just come in with their kids for portraits on the spur of the moment? But what about a clothing consultation, to make sure everyone is dressed in clothes and colors that will create the most flattering family portrait? I mean, what if two kids are wearing green and red striped shirts and three other siblings are wearing polka dots? Steve (scratching his head): What’s wrong with stripes or polka dots? And what’s a clothing confrontation? Me (biting my lip to keep from laughing out loud): Um, nothing, never mind. So I’m guessing you don’t really have lots of different backgrounds to complement what your subjects are wearing… Steve: Nah, plain white or black is fine for our clients. Sometimes we use our fancy blue background with clouds on it. And sometimes we get a request for our green garden background. That one is a big hit around Easter time, when we get all the little girls in big fluffy dresses… Me: I see. So do you enjoy working with babies and small children?

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Steve (rolls his eyes): Are you kidding me? That’s the worst part of my job, dealing with all those cranky kids and crying babies. I absolutely hate it when they cry. When I get too sick of hearing them, I usually just tell the parents to try again another day—and then I give them the day I’m off next! Hey, you’re not gonna tell my boss I said that, are you? Me: No, no, don’t worry. But don’t you think the kids just need to be given some time to adjust to their surroundings? Maybe playing with them before you actually start shooting will give them a chance to warm up and be their natural selves… Steve: Like I said before, we operate on volume. There’s just no time for that sort of stuff. “Get them in, shoot them, and get them out,” my boss always tells us. (He starts to get restless, checking his cell phone.) Are we almost done? Me: Sorry, just a few more questions and then I’ll let you go. What do you do to the photos after the session is over? Do you enhance them in any way before you show

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them to the client? Remove blemishes, soften skin, and make the eyes really sparkle? Steve: Nah, we show the clients their untouched photos. We do offer some simple enhancements but they cost extra. And it’s extra for black and white or sepia too. Me: But wouldn’t you want to present your clients with family portraits that are beautifully enhanced works of art? Steve (shrugging): Nah, that’s not what we do. If people want that, they don’t come to a studio like us. I may not know much about photography but I do know this much: you get what you pay for. If you want portraits of your kids or family that are more than just a “professional snapshot,” you go to one of those private photographers. You know, they do charge a lot more, but when you compare them to our photos, you see why in a second. Hey, you’re not gonna tell my boss I said that, are you? (He looks around worriedly.) Me (snapping the cover of my laptop

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down with a grin): Nope, don’t worry, Steve. Your secrets are safe with me. Thanks so much for your time; I’ll let you go now. Steve (looking relieved and standing up to leave): Oh, you’re welcome. I’m gonna go grab some lunch. It was nice meeting you. By the way, what do you do? Me (clearing my throat): Oh, ah…um… actually…I…Oh would you look at the time, I gotta go! [IF] Rina Schiffman is a professional photographer specializing in creating beautiful, natural, and emotive portraits of babies, children, and families. For a portrait experience that is quite the opposite of what Steve provides, contact her at 917-750-3424 or RinaSchiffman@yahoo.com. See her work at www.RinaSPhotography.com and follow her blog at www.throughrinaslens. wordpress.com to see her most recent sessions. Her home studio is located in Brooklyn NY, and she will never, ever be seen standing outside wearing a sandwich board.

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[ Should You Leverage Your Home or Pay It Down Rapidly? ] By: Yael Ishakis, First Meridian Mortgage LLC

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here is a great debate within the inner-mortgage circles these days. Should we, as loan professionals, encourage clients to borrow as much money as possible? Or would consumers benefit more if we helped them to understand the advantages of 15-year amortization schedules and pre-paying principal? Let’s examine the pros and cons of both strategies. Leveraging Your Property. In order to understand why you’d want to borrow as much as possible for your home purchase, you must first grasp the concept that equity has a zero rate of return. Here’s an example: If Consumer “A” buys a home for $300,000, and puts 20% down, then they have $60,000 in equity. Over the next 5 years, the property appreciates $100,000 in value. Consumer “A” now has $160,000 in equity. Consumer “B” buys a home for $300,000, and puts no money down. At the end of 5 years, that same home is now worth $400,000. Consumer “B” has $100,000 in equity, which is the same appreciation as Consumer “A,” a net $100,000. As you can see, your down payment has nothing to do with your rate of return. What becomes important is how you choose to manage the $60,000 you didn’t use as a down payment. If you use it for frivolous activities, such as buying toys or going to Las Vegas, it would be more prudent for you to use that money as a down payment. Especially since this will enable you to obtain a lower interest rate. However, if you were to invest the $60,000

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in a vehicle that can out-earn the cost of that debt, then this could be a formula for success. This is why some lending professionals suggest putting as little down as you possibly can, maximizing your tax write-off, and investing the rest. This principle has been applied for many years in the life insurance game. The old saying goes, “Buy term and invest the rest.” The key component is taking the money you would have used as a down payment and creating an asset accumulation account. This account should earn a significant enough rate of return to enable you to pay your mortgage off entirely and achieve the ultimate goal of being debt-free. Paying Your Home Down Rapidly. There are very few times over the course of my career that I have seen a client with zero debt and no financial difficulties. Choosing to pay off all of your debt can reduce stress and help you to gain freedom of cash flow for investment opportunities. A 15-year mortgage or a bi-weekly payment strategy provides structure. It can also put you on track to have your mortgage paid off within a set timeframe. Simply put, it contains built-in discipline. It’s important, however, to understand that regardless of how rapidly you pay your home off, you’re not getting any greater rate of return on your investment than if you paid it off slowly. Conclusion. So how does one determine which scenario is best? The choice depends entirely upon the individual. Savvy consumers who are disciplined, and are comfortable taking chances from an investment perspective, would do well with the first scenario. Over the F a s h i o n

course of time, it’s been proven that your rate of return over the long-haul will be far greater than the rate you’d pay for a mortgage in today’s rate environment. It’s important to seek the advice of a skilled investment advisor to ensure success with this strategy. The second scenario is best for those who have a difficult time managing their money or who’ll sleep easier at night knowing they have a plan in place to pay their loan off more rapidly. Be sure that your budget can handle accelerated payments. When consumers “bite off more than they can chew” with a 15-year mortgage, they frequently end up having to refinance back into a 30-year schedule. If you find this subject intriguing and would like to know more, I recommend that you read a book titled, Missed Fortune 101, by Douglas Andrew. It’s an outstanding read that is very simplistic and goes into far greater detail than I can cover in this column. Douglas is a financial planner who advises safe-structured investments such as whole life policies and tax-free fixed income instruments.[IF]

Yael Ishakis is affiliated with First Meridian Mortgage LLC, a Licensed Banker, NY Department of Real Estate. Yael Ishakis hosts Home Buyer’s Seminars which are open to the public on the first Tuesday of each month at 2607 Nostrand Avenue, Brooklyn, NY, from 7:30 p.m. to 8:30 p.m. Seating is limited. To reserve your seat at the next event, call 718-732-0309 to RSVP and obtain a free copy of Ishakis’s Home Buyer Handbook.

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[ Ohr Meir Foundation: A Trip of a Lifetime ] By: Shloime Dachs

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hirteen years ago I received a phone call from Yanky Edelstein asking me to sing on Chanukah in Orlando, Florida. He went on to introduce me to “Ohr Meir,” an organization established by Ari and Idy Friedman in memory of their beloved son, Meir A”h. Chanukah and my appreciation for life will never be the same. It’s a four-day trip of a lifetime for close to 50 special children who are very ill. To date, Ohr Meir has taken over 700 children from across the United States and Canada (many of which are from Brooklyn) to Disney World and its surrounding theme parks. 52

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Sea World, Islands Of Adventure, Universal Studios, and of course Disney’s Magic Kingdom are just some of the highlights the kids experience each and every year. VIP passes are distributed to the Several days before the trip, each campers and counselors so there are child receives a full UPS package no lines to wait on. Special private of Disney goodies and games, dining rooms on Disney/Universal along with an Ohr Meir T-Shirt grounds for eating gourmet Glatt and sweatshirt to get them excited Kosher meals are also arranged and pumped for a magical trip they to maximize every minute in the will never forget. In addition, every parks. Face painters are hired every camper is given their own personal morning to paint the kids’ faces to digital video camera to record their start their day and each camper has own magical adventure, endless gifts their own Menorah to light. and surprises, and $25 Chanukah Gelt to spend in the parks. A beautiful concert after supper on day 2 is the highlight of the trip All the flights, transportation, medical staff, lodging, and food are coordinated by the most dedicated volunteers of family and friends, known as the “Ohr Meir Crew.”

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to many campers who get to sing and dance and let loose, leaving their pain and sorrow behind. It’s a singing experience that words cannot describe. Emotions run high as sad faces turn into happy smiles. I’m so humbled and thankful to have this unique opportunity. Thanks to a great idea of Jay Tepper, a surprise stopover at Toys R Us allows the children to run through the aisles and fill their wagons up to the top with anything and everything they want up to $100! Their ear-to-ear smiles are priceless!

sure the meals are all freshly cooked, prepared, and transported to the parks. It’s a huge and very organized operation.

others in some old antique; But everybody’s candle lighting is special and unique. Right here in Florida, candles have been lit too, A state of the art Website was Candles not of beeswax, not with constructed for the parents back oil, but with something new. home to follow along every step Candles which will remain burning of their child’s adventure, live!! for each of us through the year; Each day hundreds of photos are Candles which give strength to forge uploaded on the site allowing and not despair. them to login and see the nachas Candles lit to stay ablaze, for they of so many happy faces. Ohr Meir ignited a spark, coordinates every detail of the Illuminating the world for many trip, and pays for it in its entirety groping in the dark. with absolutely no overhead costs Its warmth, its radiance will leave an In Magic Kingdom, a private or administrative costs, and 100% eternal effect exclusive photo shoot with Mickey of every dollar donated goes On all of us its glow and brilliance and Minnie Mouse is arranged for directly to benefit the children. permanently will reflect. each child to take a picture, get an We were each gifted with this autograph, and of course get a big Below is a touching note composed opportunity hug—a true tear jerker. by one of the Ohr Meir children: To enjoy a phenomenal getaway so immensely, in unity. On the third night a beautiful Dear Mr. and Mrs. Friedman, A breath of fresh air, a change in banquet meal is prepared by the atmosphere. one and only Reuven Millet, and I would like to take this opportunity The benefits and dividends are everyone is given awards and a to express my appreciation for all that positively clear: life-size plush Mickey Mouse doll you have done for me. You enabled each of us to ascend to to take home. The kids then sit greater heights. together and watch a fully edited The memories of Orlando 2007 will But you can never fathom the video of their first three days in the forever remain with me. It was a renewed energy we gained from parks. Remarkable. time that gave me the opportunity these sights. to start to heal, with the help of the The mileage of this trip will certainly On the final day at breakfast, each care, support, and friendship that I take us a long way. camper is given a beautiful album received there. Ohr Meir, Dr. Steinherz, and dear full of pictures of them on this counselors, in our hearts you’ll once-in-a-lifetime memorable trip. Enclosed is a poem that was read at always stay. the trip. There are three Minyanim each day —In the name of all participants [IF] with a Sefer Torah, where many of May HKB”H repay you and your the children actually receive their family for your kindness and bentch first Aliya at the Torah. Many you with kol tuv, gezunt, nachas, and Ohr Meir is located at 3023 Avenue J, Brooklyn, NY 11210. For donations months of preparation go into true happiness always. and more information, please call this amazing four-day dream trip. Truckloads and shipments of food, It’s Chanukah and all across the 718-252-5900 or email us at info@ ohrmeir.org. You can also find us on snacks, milk, etc. are sent from New world today York. Ohr Meir rents a refrigerated People are lighting candles in their the web at www.ohrmeir.org. truck and has a complete kitchen own humble way. staff of seven volunteers to make Some on huge silver menorahs, 54

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saving them to pack your dishes soon because you are downsizing now that your kids are married and you’re moving to smaller quarters… eventually. Liberate yourself from the prison of clutter. Declare yourself emancipated from its shackles and you will soon be able to walk a straight line in your home instead of dodging piles and tripping over assorted thingamajigs on the floor.

[ Organize It! ]

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By: Baila Feig

f you are like many people, you probably have too many possessions—what some people commonly call “too much stuff.” Um, did I just hear you scream “YES! That’s me!”? I thought so. I also think I heard you scream it with an overwhelming feeling of dismay, not with an exclamation of pride. I know—because I work with people all the time. The amassing of possessions reminds me of the “water displacement theory.” Putting objects in a container of water will displace the water. Adding more objects will continue to displace the water until there is no more room in the container and the water will spill out. Think of your house or office as the water container. If you keep adding new things and don’t eliminate other things, eventually your stuff will start spilling out of your windows! How’s that for a visual? After all your closets, drawers, shelves, bookcases, bureaus, entertainment centers, under the bed containers, basements, attics, and garages have reached their

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maximum capacity, you will begin to start sharing a bed with your latest acquisitions. And soon, it will be more of them than you! Do you really want to be displaced by your stuff and wind up on the floor? I thought not, and so therefore, there is hope.

So if you are ready to put on your new “glasses,” we will begin with the process of living a clutter-free existence.

Determine which area of your space or bad habit is giving you the most grief. Most of the time, it’s the incessant influx of papers that gets to people’s sanity. They don’t stop If you really do want to see what coming. They pile up (without your the inside of your closets look like, noticing). More piles appear. They or to remind yourself of what the multiply like jackrabbits. Then the pattern of your carpet is, then you piles start to fall over. Now you are must put on your “I want to see the starting to get into trouble. You inside of my house again” glasses. “say” (euphemistically speaking), You will have to be committed to “Which papers were in which pile? the cause, a soldier in the army I sorted them! Someone will pay for engaged in ruthless warfare, a brave this!” One of these is the “I need to warrior in the mission of complete read this” pile; another is the “Oh annihilation of clutter! You will shrek, I must do this TODAY!” forge forward in the purging of pile. Another is the UFP pile— broken toys, games without pieces, unidentified flying papers pile. obsolete electronics, cookbooks that Sitting down and crying is not an recommend you deep-fry chicken option. You must take action. Try cutlets in shmaltz, Crisco, or Nyfat, your best to figure out what goes in yellowed newspapers, magazines which pile and pay someone, call that show the latest style—big hair someone, return something, sign and shoulder pads! Yes, you are still something, mail something, answer waiting to read them. You haven’t your machitenester’s son’s chasunah gotten to them yet because you had invitation already! After all, he’s five babies in eight years, and that getting married in two days! was twenty years ago and you’ve Once you see you’ve done something, been busy. Don’t tell yourself you’re anything, you’ll feel better. You’ll

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feel accomplished. It will encourage you to do more. Start with today’s mail. Pick it up from the hall floor or mailbox, stand over the recycling garbage, and just toss what you don’t want in your life. Mailings to have your windows replaced, John’s Pizza Grand Opening Party, or a chance to win a free trip to Hawaii should go. (Hmmmm, on second thought, warm Hawaii does sound enticing. Did they say it feels like six degrees today, or was that minus six degrees? I’ll sit on this offer for now.)

advocate extracting vital information from pieces of paper and keeping a running list of this information in a notebook instead of keeping all these papers, I will tell you a story I heard as a thirdperson four times removed:

A family from Boston was invited to a chasunah in Brooklyn. The wife, wanting to be rid of clutter asap, decided she would transfer the stats from the invitation, mark them on the family calendar, and chuck the invitation. Her husband was opposed to this idea. “What if, Now what do you do with the mail theoretically speaking, you neglect you decided to keep? You leave it to write critical information, or we now for your spouse to handle, need to double check the accuracy of right? Not if you want anything the notes you put on the calendar?” productive to happen to it!! Take he asked. “Ohhh nooooo. I would the bull by the horns and find never do thaaat. That wouldn’t be some file folders, which I know very organized of me, now would it? you have, somewhere. One should We wouldn’t need to double check. be labeled “UNPAID BILLS.” Put Do you think I am some kind all the known unpaid bills, current of nincompoop?!” she retorted, and ancient, in this folder. This is insulted. one of the most important files you will use. Another is “ACTION So the couple made arrangements FILE.” In this file you can put kids to rent a car, rent a hotel room in trip forms to sign and send back, a Brooklyn for after the chasunah, recipe you just found and want to take the next day off from work, and buy the ingredients for this week, then head home. They and their kids response cards to every dinner, bar got all packed up, dressed up, and mitzvah, melave malkah, mother- worked up for their exciting trip to daughter tea, father and sons Brooklyn. They found parking and learning program, chasunah, baby entered the chasunah hall. Lo and shower, golden anniversary, and behold, no one was there. The wife birthday party you are currently thought, “Wwwhhhhat happened? lucky enough to be invited to—and Where’s everyone? Did they, chas that’s just this month’s worth! No v’shalom, cancel the chasunah?” wonder you can’t find the time to They found one of the owners get organized. You’re constantly walking around and asked him about the Rivkie Schvartzkleider partying!! to Shmerel Schlafrig chasunah. He said, “Yeah, it was a great While we are on the topic of chasunah—very leiberdig.” Mrs. invitations, I would offer this “Boston” asked, “Did you say ‘it advice—as much as I ordinarily was a great chasunah’?!” “Yes, it 60

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was exactly a week ago tonight, as a matter of fact.” “Oh,” said the very withered-looking, soon-to-possiblybe ex-Mrs. “Boston,” as she glanced at the very red and steaming Mr. “Boston.” In our fervor to be the most clutterfree of all our friends and neighbors, we may be inclined to throw out the not-yet-happened event invitation. But after reading about our friends from Boston, we will have to buck up, hold on to it until it is over, and then throw it out with great glee. Well, I see you are all now almost completely organized, and it’s all for the better, to be sure. Keep up the good work and you’ll be ready for Purim, Pesach, camp, the bungalow, and Rosh Hashana in a snap! [IF] Baila Feig, Founder and President of Why Organizing Works, is a Professional Organizer who organizes any and all rooms and office space for Professionals, Working Families, Seniors, and Singles. She declutters, does space optimization, creates filing systems, packs and unpacks your move, and more. Accounting, Bookkeeping and Computer Services are also available. If you are in need of a speaker to conduct a fun and informative Organizing Workshop at luncheons, PTA, or informal get-togethers, Call Baila at 347-598-9608 or email her at info@whyorganizingworks.com. join baila on twitter (http://bit.ly/ wowtwitter) and facebook (http:// on.fb.me/woworganizing) for a 10% discount on your first 3-hour session.

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[Live a Life of Design, Not Default ] By: Esther Mishkowitz

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s we discussed in the previous coaching article, Life Coaching is for people whose lives are generally going well. Yet, they feel there is something they would like to improve, change, and/or make happen to enhance their lives. Would you like to… Lose the weight you’ve always wanted to lose? Start and stick to an exercise program? Follow through on an idea you’ve been wanting to try your hand at, but aren’t sure how? Are you an empty nester seeking fulfillment? When you partner with a life coach, you’ve taken the first step in making your goal a reality. At your first coaching session, your Life Coach will ask what you want to accomplish. Once your goal has been clarified, you may want to explore any fears or obstacles that are in your way. These dialogues will empower you to manage or overcome the challenge(s) you are facing, allowing you to move forward. With your input and ideas, your 62

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coach will help you realize what small steps you might take to begin the process of reaching your goal. It is important that the steps chosen by you are realistic so that you feel confident and motivated to begin your journey. The coaching process is a partnership between client and coach. Therefore, clients are encouraged to check in between sessions with the coach for extra support, or to share a win.

Esther Mishkowitz is certified as a professional coach by Darco Coaching School, Coaching for Excellence program. As a coach, Esther specializes in helping people overcome obstacles and realize their full potential. Her areas of specialty are empty nest syndrome, weight loss, and fitness. Acquaint yourself with Life Coaching by signing up for a free introductory session. Contact Esther at 917407-6539 or eglm78@gmail.com. Sessions are available in person or by phone.

What steps might you take to… [IF]

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[ Ask the Shadchan ] By: Yisrael Friedman

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n shidduchim, what is the balance who takes every worry and between positive encouragement anxiety into account and gets and undue pressure? nervous himself/herself to act as the shadchan lest they be held The final stages of a shidduch is like responsible down the road, i.e., a fragile mining rig: If you push Boy: I like everything about her; I through too strong, the whole mine am just really nervous that she won’t would collapse; but if you do not want to have over my Bochurim push with sufficient force, you will friends for shabbos! Shadchan: never break through. Let’s discuss Ummm, I hear, this is a real problem; the approaches of two different friends are really important and if she types of shadchanim: can’t have them over for a seudah on Shabbos, you have a big problem on A. The aggressive, pushy shadchan your hands. Let me speak to my rosh who tries to discount all of both yeshiva and see what his take is.— parties’ concerns and responds with Click. sometimes outrageous reassurances to real legitimate concerns, i.e., Obviously both these examples are Girl: I am totally not attracted to exaggerated versions and I don’t him and we are holding by the eighth believe a professional shadchan date! Shadchan: Attraction will would respond in either one of these come with time. I know someone who extreme ways. wasn’t even attracted to her husband until her third anniversary! Or even As a shadchan or a parent, it is more ridiculous, Who says you need your job to be your child’s voice to be physically attracted to your of reason. Weed out the invalid spouse? As long as there is emotional from the legitimate. I can tell you attraction, you’ ll be happy. Needless dozens of stories of shidduchim to say these preposterous assurances that fell apart for reasons that are not genuine or hold truth, and stemmed from “cold feet,” while they can cause serious consequences months later, looking back even the down the road. young people involved themselves B. The overly concerned shadchan couldn’t understand why they said 64

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no. One girl I was dealing with was so uncomfortable with the idea of switching over to Nusach Sefard after marriage, and somehow the shidduch dissipated. I was involved with another boy who didn’t like the girl’s vocal pitch when she laughed, and he felt “forced” to call it off. These may sound like extreme examples, but you’d be surprised how relevant these situations can become. Obviously many of these botherations are irrational and emotional, and it is the satan’s way of shterring by convincing you that you can always do better. Bottom line, a reliable shadchan finds a healthy balance where he/ she can push a shidduch through without being overly aggressive, and really listens and tries to work out each party’s concerns. [IF] To submit questions for an upcoming article, please email yfriedman@ gatewaysonline.com. For all shidduchim inquiries, please contact Gateways Shidduch Office at connections@gatewaysonline.com.

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