The Secret How To Let Go Of What Does Not Serve You
MELISSA HULL FOUNDER, TV HOST, PRODUCER, SPEAKER, AUTHOR, CONSULTANT
Copyright by Melissa Hull As we move into a new decade, much of our collective focus is on goals, achievement, and action: What do we want to add to our lives in 2020? But stop and think about that for a second: How busy are you already? How full is your calendar today? How close to overwhelm are you right now? Our energy is balance. Before you expand what, you want to achieve in the next decade, it’s important to first clear out what you want to release from the 2010s. What I know for sure are the things we leave behind to allow us to bring in so much more — more than anything we ever thought was possible. And that’s what I want for you in 2020. Want more from the next decade? Let’s clear some room.
The Secret to Letting Go of What Does Not Serve You If you’ve ever taken a yoga class, listened to a guided meditation, or read a wellness book, you’ve probably heard this phrase before: Let go of what does not serve you.
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But what does that mean, and how do you do it? Well, part of the problem is we were never taught how to let go of something, and it will look different for everyone. But for me, letting go is all about forgiveness. You can’t let go of something until you’ve forgiven it. You can resolve to limit your social media time to 15 minutes daily, or you decide to take a hiatus. Except, whenever you find yourself in a weak moment, you’re back on social media — soaking up the glow from other people’s lives and using it to shadow your own. Maybe you even stick to your social media diet, but you still notice that feeling creeping into your life … when you go to networking events or holiday parties, for example. The root of the problem isn’t social media, though that habit may exacerbate the problem. The real problem is you haven’t forgiven yourself for not being where you want to be. If you’re noticing an emotion, habit, relationship, or thought pattern that doesn’t serve you, don’t just treat the symptoms. Figure out what needs to be forgiven, so you can release that problem from the root.
That’s how you say bye to that which does not serve you — and truly create new space and expansion to call in something greater.
How I Learned to Let Go of What Wasn’t Serving Me There was a time when I was struggling. I was in a constant space of hurt and anger. I was reactive instead of responsive, and I was losing my mind over stupid stuff way too often. I was holding onto so much hurt, and I refused to let myself heal because I didn’t want to give others the satisfaction of my forgiveness. Yet all I was doing was tying myself to the misery that had nothing to do with them and everything to do with me. I was scared of what would happen if I forgave myself. When I finally realized how deeply I needed self-forgiveness, I made a decision and consciously chose it. And I had to keep choosing it with every thought pattern, journal entry, and daily instinct to “just keep pushing.” But you know what? It was so
incredibly powerful. Forgiveness was the most powerful gift I’ve ever given myself. The more I practiced it, the more it unleashed this force of inner creativity, inspiration, and power. By choosing
