April 2019 by injoymagazine

I n J oy Magazine

A Collaboritave platform for art, encouragement and loving life in the bay

Motivation Yourself

Others

InJoy Magazine, April 2019

InJoy Magazine

InJoy Magazine is a local independent publication dedicated to real women We feature articles, short stories, poetry, reviews and all around encouragement from local writers like you.

A new theme featured each month:

May: New Reasons to Celebrate” June: ‘Shit no one talks about’ July ‘Motherhood’

~ We aim to grow into the largest local publication for women in the region ~ InJoy Magazine, April 2019

Credits and Contributors Editor/Creator Crystal Smith

Lead Contributor Chelsea Harrison

Contributing Writer La-Anna Douglas

Contributing Writer Angelique Mosley

Social Media Manager Toby Boas

InJoy Magazine, April 2019

Contents...whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s inside 10.....When you feel alone

A short story by Chloe St Cliffe

14.....My Rightful Place

by La-Anna Douglas

18.....Small Deeds, Great Love

Random Acts of Motivation

by Chelsea Harrison

20.....Mending Fences

an article about reaching out

by Angelique Mosley

24....Low Point Lifestyle

Recipies and tips for healthy lifestyles

Everywhere....Interactive prompts to encourage and inspire

InJoy Magazine, April 2019

Regular Contributors Wanted For these article types Think you have what it takes? Join us and find out...

~ Products that bring out the best

Looking for reviews/suggestions of products that share the

views of InJoyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s encouragement and laughter

~ Real Stories

Our readers love your stories. As a community, we bring

eachother together by sharing our own stories.

~ How to... Are you a Saavy DIYer? If so, share your secrets...and for godâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s sake, someone tell me how to chalk paint that dresser!

Always looking for more of this... Poetry Real-Life Stories Short Stories Recipies

InJoy Magazine, April 2019

To my dear reader friends, Ok ladies, get ready to get motivated here. We have an whole array of topics to prompt you into your next feel-good adventure. If you haven’t noticed already, we are dedicated – no – obsessed with encouraging you to DO something wonderful, and this month it’s all about the behind-the-scenes motivation to do so. First, it’s yourself. Where does your inner motivation come from? Don’t answer me here, ponder this question for a day or two. Then I want you to think about those around you. How can you encourage them knowing what you do about yourself? Keep the deepest message of InJoy Magazine in mind. We are here as a community, to share with eachother. We are not alone, we are a village of mothers, women, workers, wives, concubines, servers, leaders (the point is, endless roles we all play). The young woman next to you in line could be facing the same struggles you have felt before, and you have the incredible INCREDIBLE ability to make a difference in her life with one kind word or gesture. Yes, I am trying to convey a heavy responsibility we have to those who surround us every single day. So as you read our wonderful magazine this month, you’ll see various prompts to encourage and yes! Motivate you to reach out to those around you. But I encourage you to take it a step further this month. Don’t just offer a kind word and check that box of good deeds…encourage someone else to make that choice as well. Talk about the impact they could have telling their story, tell them their struggles are not for naught. Tell them they have purpose, they are worthy, they have the ability to mend fences and they can make an impact in small and subtle ways.

Yours -Crystal

InJoy Magazine, April 2019

My dear self,

Dig deep. What really motivates me?

What can I do to make a difference in this world?

Who is my community? Will they listen?

What is my responsibility? Who is my responsibility?

What could I possibly do?

InJoy Magazine, April 2019

Read something new today

Could be... Book of another genra Pick up a magazine you normally wouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t Read a few nutrition labels of items you regularly buy

InJoy Magazine, April 2019

Social Media Engagement www.injoymagazine.com

https://twitter.com/JoyStCliffe

https://www.facebook.com/injoymagazine/ https://www.facebook.com/groups/smalldeeds,greatlove/

www.instagram.com/injoymag

Discover your Creative Writing potential at AACC. Did you know?

Chelsea Harrison, InJoy lead contributor, is a noncredit writing instructor at AACC. • • • •

WRI-360 Poetry: Discover Poetic Potential WRI-369 Poetry Part 2: Expand your Poetic Portfolio WTI-368 Creative Writing for Military and Veterans WRI-370 Introduction to Personal Branding

InJoy Magazine, April 2019

9 www.aacc.edu/programs-and-courses/personal-enrichment/writing/

When you feel alone

a short story by Chloe St Cliffe

She was independent, Joselin assured herself selecting a yellow dress among the hanging row of dresses stuffed in her closet and draped it across the back of the chair already stacked full of discarded clothes. Next, she pulled a set of white lace cheeky panties and matching padded bra from the drawer and slipped them both on, and then followed with the lightweight material of the dress. The fabric glided over her skin and fit perfectly over her breasts and hips. This one was one of her own designs, submitted to her boss, who had made a few minor changes before sending on to production for the spring line. Even if it wasn’t part of her job to wear and display the latest trends, she would have done so anyway. Shopping was her delight, but properly matching and coordinating with accessories was her gift. As soon as she was finished in the closet, Joselin made her way back into the bedroom to pick up her phone she had discarded earlier. Surely by now Kirk would have seen her message and replied. He was so doting, she thought warmly, and imagined he InJoy Magazine, April 2019

would say something like, ‘I’m sorry sweet baby’ or ‘good morning to my sexy lady’. But when she clicked the phone to life there was still nothing. She scrolled through her messages before double checking the signal. That was truly unusual. Joselin sat down on the edge of her bed and tapped on the facebook icon. She pulled the screen downward to refresh the posts several times, but still there was nothing new she hadn’t read from the night before. Strange. Dismissing the thought, Joselin set the phone back down on the bedspread and stood to finish getting ready for her day. She dried and straightened her hair, applied a conservative amount of makeup and slipped on a pair of white designer heels. She then pulled down an oversized white handbag from the shelf in her closet and transferred the contents of yesterday’s purse into this one. Picking up her phone on her way out of the bedroom, Joselin looked again expecting to see a message from Kirk by now. Still there was nothing. Truly frustrated now, she selected a green apple from the bowl on the table before heading

out the door and down the flight of stairs that led out into the street of downtown. Her mind was focused on Kirk, wondering why she hadn’t heard from him yet this morning when she made her way across the street to the Starbucks on the corner. Her eyes were on her phone, pulling up the list of messages and typing out another one to Kirk. “Where are you?” it read, and she clicked the send button and then lowering her phone and looking ahead of her to the corner. Joselin stopped abruptly in the middle of the normally busy street. Her apartment rested in the middle of downtown, center to the bustle of traffic and community that she loved so much. Trendy bars and shops lined the sidewalk when, even in this early hour of 7:30 in the 10

morning, the street would normally be filled with walking commuters, runners and traffic. Yet this morning the road and sidewalks were quite vacant. No cars, no foot traffic…no people. Had she woken up earlier than normal and hadn’t realized it? She hadn’t put on a watch this morning, so she clicked her phone on again to check the time on the lock screen. 7:36am. Looking skyward she saw the true blue color of a clear sky shining between the brown and gray buildings overhead. It was surely bright enough the be 7:36. Slowly this time she made her way to the corner where the reflective windows of Starbucks imitated the bright yellow of her dress. She pulled on the brushed silver rod of the door and it swung open easily. The InJoy Magazine, April 2019

absence of commuters was surely a little strange, but nothing altogether unheard of. It was still early. Maybe there was even a festival in town, she reasoned to herself. Or a football game. Joselin paused just inside the store as the door closed silently behind her. On any normal morning she would be waiting at least ten minutes in line before even ordering her coffee. This place was usually packed, but on this strange absent morning not a single other person was in sight. Well, at least she wouldn’t have to wait. Joselin stepped up to the counter and leaned over the polished marble countertop. The dim lighting and painted walls of dark purples and greens added to the aura of trend and style and expensive coffee. “Hello,” Joselin called out toward the doorway that led

to the back room. She imagined a pair of long haired kids, the hippie type complete with nose rings and thick eyeliner, huddled in the back room. Doing what though? Watching TV? Suddenly a thought occurred to her. If something catastrophic had happened in the news, she would have no way of knowing. She owned a tv, a small one, but never watched it. She didn’t have cable, didn’t subscribe to any of the movie streaming subscriptions. She was far too busy in her life to waste time watching boring nonsense and bad acting, so she didn’t even bother these days. Images of 9/11 flashed through her mind, a time where the whole world sat dumbstruck staring at their televisions not quite believing something so terrible could happen. But if something bad had happened…someplace, then surely Kirk would have called her. Or her father or her mother. Joselin pulled up her phone again and selected the Internet browser. She then typed in the name of a popular news station and waited as the page loaded onto the tiny screen. Man arrested for killing his wife, Politician accused of having an affair, Civil war in Syria, Best beach hotels for summer… there was nothing. See there, nothing was going on in this world catastrophic enough to make Kirk ignore 11

her all morning and Starbucks to be abandoned by its workers. This was getting ridiculous. Joselin’s hand dropped to the counter a little harder than she’d intended as she called out again. “Hello, is anyone here?” No response. Exacerbated, she finally stalked out of the coffee shop and back onto the sidewalk. Looking around her again, this time in all four directions she still saw no one in sight. What the hell was going on here? Whatever it was, it wasn’t funny. She couldn’t wait to tell her father about the vacant coffee shop and what an ass Kirk was being. It was so unlike him too. Her foot tapped absently on the pavement as she pressed on her phone’s screen again this time pulling up her list of contacts. She tried Kirk first. It rang until voicemail finally picked up. Then she tried her dad. “You’ve reached George Carver of Carver Developments. Please leave your name and contact…” Joselin hung up before the message finished. Maybe they were in a meeting. At least her mother would be awake. No, straight to voicemail, it didn’t even ring that time. Her best friend, Lori. Her boss, Lucy. InJoy Magazine, April 2019

Her office number. Kirk’s office. Parents home line. Mom’s cell. Dad’s cell. Dad’s office. Nothing. Operator 0. Once the line connected it only rang three times before being disconnected. “What?” she shouted glaring down at the screen. A red bar blinked ‘call failed’. Taking a deep breath, Joselin gripped the small device in her fist. She looked around the street again, unseeing of the still vacant sidewalk and roadways. The street-front was eerily and unusually silent. Disgusted, Joselin began to stalk down the sidewalk toward the corner in the direction of her office. Whatever this was, it wasn’t funny. There was no reason in the world that everyone should simply

be gone unless someone made it this way. Someone who set it up…like a set up…like a set. Yes, a practical joke. This was a practical joke, she knew it now. And if Kirk had anything to do with this, she would never forgive him. She would threaten not to marry him. She would bash his head with her yardstick-ruler she used for measuring and cutting fabric. She wondered how far this practical joke stretched. Surely, even the most powerful and well-funded television shows wouldn’t reach far, interfering with daily commuting and business. She kept walking, trying to ignore the sense of unease creeping up her spine. Exactly as it had been on the street, and the coffee shop, her building was completely and entirely empty. 12

Do you feel alone?

Who can you talk to about it?

InJoy Magazine, April 2019

My Rightful Place By the beautiful La-Anna Douglas InJoy Magazine, April 2019

When you are faced with something that has kept you living in silence for so long, how do you find the courage to stand anyhow? Where do you find the strength to see your life beyond those limitations that may have silenced you?

y life has been filled with so much love and happiness from my childhood up to this present moment; people are so surprised to hear what I have overcome. I have faced some faith wavering challenges that almost broke me to my core. Learning to see the beauty in myself and understanding what my purpose is, has been one of my greatest triumphs. For so long, I was torn down by the name calling by my bullies including “Ugly!!” or “You are Too dark to be beautiful!”. I depended on their approval to survive and when rejected, I lost control of who I was. When I look back at the teenage version of myself, at first I feel sorry for her. Then I am reminded of the impact I can have on the teenagers on today! Now as a woman, I have finally taken my rightful place to truly stand in my calling. But how did I get to this new outlook and understanding? By much prayer & encouragement from my family and friends. I started to feel motivated to step outside the box of impossibilities. The bullies of my past, their words no longer had a hold of me. The naysayers could not steal my joy any longer. This new found strength has empowered me in ways I would have never dreamed of before. If I would have allowed the outside negativity to live in my present; I would not be strong enough to share my story, help others find healing, walk the runway in fashion shows or do radio interviews. The possibilities are endless for us all. Each day we are given we must make the InJoy Magazine, April 2019

choice to make an impact on this world. Everyone may not see your purpose or understand the direction you are trying to go in, and that’s okay! What do you feel? What do you see for yourself? What do you want for others? The opportunity is in your hands. Don’t let it pass you by! So as I stand in my rightful place, I reach my hand out to you because there’s enough room up here for us all.

Mrs. La-Anna Douglas, Creator of HopeStillStands LLC based on her Journey From Hatred to Hope! Social Media: @hopestillstands_llc Photo Credit: Mama.photog

You have a purpose

InJoy Magazine, April 2019

You are the only one who knows FEELS the impact they have had on your life. (Remember, this is only for yourself...)

What is it?

Our lives are shaped by experiences, who we are is a result of influences and the impact of others. Take a moment to dwell on those impacts. Write one positive How you can share

One negative How you overcame that stronghold

How could you encourage those younger to do the same?

InJoy Magazine, April 2019

Small Deeds, Great Love Chelsea Harrison

Down the street from my house, there is a small sign that says, “You got this!” It is one of those placards held up by two wire posts. It is on public land at a busy intersection. It was drawn with markers, maybe crayons, and has little hearts and stars in the white space around the words. It had a sign friend with a similar message a few weeks ago, which has since disappeared. I love that sign. I don’t know where it came from or exactly when it appeared, but it makes such a positive little burst in my day, every time I see it. If had to guess, I would say some teenagers made it and perhaps it relates to the mental health issues and tragic suicides that have taken place in our community, recently but also far too often in our community’s history. It reminds me of a recent shopping trip to Aerie, in the Annapolis Mall. The dressing room doors opened to reveal a colorful flurry of sticky notes all around the mirror. I started reading the notes to discover 50 or so supportive, empowering messages. Some of them were funny, some snarky, some emotional, some had a subtle vulnerability that felt strangely humanizing in a mall dressing room. One note said, “Soft

InJoy Magazine, April 2019

“We can do no great things. Only small things with great love.”

bodies give great hugs.” Another said “Stretch marks are beauty marks.” Lots had more generic cheerleading: “You are SEXY!”; “Get it, girl!”; and “You are beautiful.” In an otherwise harsh environment for women, here were these little encouraging messages to brighten the experience. In light of this month’s theme, “Motivating Others,” I am proposing we start a new trend…Random Acts of Motivation. Random Acts of Kindness are nice, but so 90s (Remember that movie, Pay It Forward, and that cute little kid who played the main character? Yea, he’s 30 now.) Let’s try Random Acts of Motivation. Because confidence in ourselves is so important! And sometimes, when we receive a random act of motivation, it’s enough of a catalyst for us set that confidence free.

Let’s try Random Acts of Motivation. 18

ds, e e D l l a Sm ove Great L : tep Action S

What?: Create something that will serve as a random act of motivation for someone. This could be a note, a sign, a text message to a random phone number…get creative! Who?: We just don’t know; that’s the fun part of being random. When?: Anytime this month. Where?: Maybe you leave a note on a park bench. Maybe on a random car. Maybe at the library, you leave a note in a random book. The possibilities are endless. Why?: Because you never know the impact that note could have. And because it’s fun! Don’t forget to join the fun on social media. Join us on the Facebook Injoy page, or Small Deeds, Great Love page and be sure to share pictures/stories etc. of your Random Acts challenge.

https://www.facebook.com/injoymagazine/ https://www.facebook.com/groups/smalldeeds,greatlove/

InJoy Magazine, April 2019

hen I married my ex-husband in 2008, it came out that he had a less than great relationship with his step mother. His parents divorced when he was a young boy and his father remarried not long after. Stepmom came in and raised the children as her own.

ents to my children. I make it a point to keep in touch, so I call every Sunday so the kids can speak to them. After several lengthy conversations with my husband I decided to surprise the great grandparents and bring the kids to New Jersey for Thanksgiving.

Me being his wife, now two are one…and if he had a problem with her that meant I had a problem with her. We were cordial over the years whenever we saw each other or spoke on the phone but that was it. There was no spending time, sitting around, talking, and generally enjoying each other’s company or anything of the sort.

I was both excited and nervous, it was our first family road trip but it was also going to be the first time my former in-laws met my new husband. My husband assured me he would protect us and so off we went. Grandpa Wayne (my former father in law) was in on the surprise as he was super excited to see his grandkids. The surprise was a hit! The great grandparents laughed, cried and were so happy to see the kids; after all it had been 2 years since they’d last seen them.

That all changed here recently. My ex-husband’s grandparents are great grandparInJoy Magazine, April 2019

The moment of truth came later that day when I saw my former mother in law. I was prepared to be civil but not much else. She as it turns out was prepared to ask me to take my family and leave her house if I so much as thought about being disrespectful. My former brother in law and his family came to spend the holiday with the family as well and it was the conversation I had with him that led to the reconciliation between her and me. As it turns out I had her all wrong. She’s tough don’t get me wrong but also one of the sweetest women I know and makes the most awesome lasagna!!! I put aside everything I’d been told by the ex and extended an olive branch. Mom took it. We spent that time getting over past hurt (she wanted to be my friend but I wouldn’t let her, she wanted to be grandmother to my kids but me believing everything told to me by the ex I wouldn’t let her do that either), unraveling what we’d both been told by the ex and doing away with preconceived notions we had about each other. There were tears, hugs, a lot of I love you’s and as I found out they even approved of the husband (we all agree he’s the best thing to happen to the kids.) The original plan was to come up for the day and head back home but things went so well we stayed an extra day. Mom immediately went into full on Grandma mode and took the kids to the movies the next day. It was awesome. I came away from this realizing I spent those years avoiding her like the plague because my ex had issue with her. Unfortunately for me I let it become my issue rather than encouraging

InJoy Magazine, April 2019

Family is everything.

him to work things out. I remain grateful that she was willing to forgive me and move on. I’m glad I listened to my husband when he encouraged me that this was something that needed to happen. Back at the hotel he told me at one point Dad asked him if he was going to join our conversation in the kitchen, my husband simply replied saying “No, they have things they need to work out.” He was right. In the end I was motivated to work this out at first for my children but I gained so much more myself. Motivation is a powerful force. Is there a fence in your life that needs mending? Do the right thing, you just might be surprised. I know I was and I couldn’t be happier. Family is everything.

Is there a fence on your mind that needs mending?

What would be your motivation to do so?

Imagine your best case scenaro...

Imagine the worse case...

Imagine...there is always hope

InJoy Magazine, April 2019

nce e f e g? th n i s i d t n Wha eeds me n that

InJoy Magazine, April 2019

Low Point Life This spring I decided to really make an effort in eating healthy-er. Not another diet, trust me it never lasts. So after some research, I decided to try the new Weight Watchers (renamed simply WW). I love it! The simpler form of counting points instead of calories is just awesome, and it honestly teaches you a better eating lifestyle. Those points count, which means while you are learning the program, you’re learning how to pick and choose healthier options.

The improvement in my energy, mood and waistline has me convinced...this is a good one!

Meal-prep is your friend. Yes, I know we’ve all heard and talked about this. To be honest, I am personally not able to meal-prep every meal for the entire upcoming week. But I have been successful at prepping my future lunches!

Grilled Plantain Bananas!

Get creative with suitable substitutes!

Corn totillas instead of flour (2 vs 3 points per) Ground turkey or chicken instead of beef (0 vs 4 points per) Nonfat greek yogurt instead of sour or cream cheeses(0 vs 2 points per Pork breakfast sasuage instead of turkey sasuage (1 vs 5 points per)

Take advantage of those freebeez! • • • • • •

Chicken Nonfat greek yogurt fruit, raw veggies (except potatos) Beans (all kinds) Eggs Not kidding! These items are point free.

InJoy Magazine, April 2019

No sense in crying over spilled milk! (or eggs) But really friends, if you make a mistake, take that bite (or slice!) of cake, don’t worry or be too hard on yourself. Just pick it back up and resume.

These were farm-fresh organic eggs. Insert crying emoji here

Best advice for staying motivated? Think about it...time rolls along anyway. A month will come and go, next year will be here regardless if you take this step or not.

Will you be ready for it?

Suggestions? Try the diet foods. Yes, I have heard them say the ingredients are worse than the real thing. No, I’m not suggesting for the long run. However, I will say, if you’re trying to reach a goal make those changes until you have reached that goal. Then reintroduce the full-fat and full-sugar foods in moderation. I mean, think about it. It’s a small price to pay to be skinny, right? Yeah, I thought so... PS. I just wanted to point out that I have not been endorsed or supported by WW (or anything else for that matter) for this magazine. My opinions here are strictly organic and not influenced by profit or hope thereof. InJoy Magazine, April 2019

Girl, you got this! Stay motivated InJoy Magazine, April 2019