M A Y
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Vancouver Island’s Parenting Resource for 32 Years
@home edition Lock Down Good Habits
Pregnancy During a Pandemic Combatting Hopelessness in the Age of Bad News
Keep Calm & Carry On @Home
Summer FUN at GNS Glenlyon Norfolk School is offering a variety of fun summer camps for students age 4½ to 17. Arts, soccer, field hockey, day camps, kayaking, magic and more—our summer programs offer something for everyone! Registration now open.
www.mygns.ca/summer-fun IB CONTINUUM CONTINUUM DE L’IB CONTINUO DEL IB
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The Victoria HarbourCats would like to tip our hats to all the doctors, nurses, caregivers, medical professionals and all other essential workers who have gone above and beyond during the COVID-19 crisis. We hope your efforts will get us all back to normal soon and that we can celebrate at the ballpark later this summer. #STAYHOME4BASEBALL
FOR MORE INFORMATION
Visit our website at:
www.harbourcats.com
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May 2020  3
In Every Issue 5
Fast Forward SUE FAST
16
Family Calendar
18
Nature Notes EMMA JANE VIGNOLA
TA B L E O F C O N T E N T S
Features 6
Keep Calm & Carry On @Home
Things to do in the best place to be.
20
Tips from a PE Teacher Dad to Keep Active in Self-isolation A boredom bootcamp. DAVID BENAY
11
Keeping Children Active & Healthy During the COVID-19 Pandemic
21
Outdoor and indoor play.
Dadspeak
ACTIVE HEALTHY KIDS
GREG PRATT
12
24
What’s for Dinner
Combatting Hopelessness in the Age of Bad News
EMILLIE PARRISH
How parents can help kids cope.
26
DR. JILLIAN ROBERTS
Kids’ Reads CHRISTINA VAN STARKENBURG
14
Pregnancy During a Pandemic
22
A Mother’s Growing Pains
A Q&A
The changing role of motherhood.
NATASHA MILLS
KELLY CLEEVE
17
32
10 Tips to Help Kids Learn at Home
Talking to Kids About Sex Increasing your comfort level with ‘The Talk.’
How to make space for learning.
JENNIFER GIBSON
M A Y
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Vancouver Island’s Parenting Resource for 32 Years
@home edition
ONTHECOVER
Lock Down Good Habits
Pavit S. (2 months) Photo by Chris Higginbottom Photography chrishigginbottom.ca Pregnancy During a Pandemic Combatting Hopelessness in the Age of Bad News
4 Island Parent @Home
Keep Calm & Carry On @Home
28
Preschool & Child Care Directory
30
Happy Families, Healthy Families CAITLIN BITTMAN
34
Cut It Out! DR. ALLISON REES
Jim Schneider Publisher publisher@islandparent.ca Sue Fast Editor editor@islandparent.ca Linda Frear Account Manager/Office Manager linda@islandparent.ca Kristine Wickheim Account Manager kristine@islandparent.ca Island Parent Magazine, published by Island Parent Group Enterprises Ltd., is a monthly publication that honours and supports parents by providing information on resources and businesses for Vancouver Island families. Views expressed are not necessarily those of the publisher. No material herein may be reproduced without the permission of the publisher. Annual mail subscriptions (12 issues) are available for $35 (GST included). Canadian Publication Mail Product Sales Agreement 40051398. ISSN 0838-5505.
Island Parent Magazine 250-388-6905 islandparent.ca
IslandParent.ca
FA STF O RWA R D
When ‘Good Enough’ is Enough
“T
oday marks the 10 year anniversary of the 6-week quarantine we’ve been on,” joked actor Ryan Reynolds during the recent “Stronger Together, Tous Ensemble” performance in aid of Food Banks Canada. Some of us might laugh. Some of us might cry. Depending on how you’re doing right now—be it the best of times or the worst—chances are you’re at least occasionally wearing thin and running out of ways to keep yourself and your kids from going crazy. Because these are crazy times. “Stay home, but still work. Lose your job, but stay positive for the kids. Become a teacher, but without a degree,” writes Susie Allison of @busytoddler. “Be every source of entertainment for your child and family, but don’t forget to have time for you.” That’s almost impossible at the best of times. But now? How do we catch our breath in hopes of getting our second wind? There’s no shortage of advice. Take it easy on yourself, let “good enough” be good enough, remind yourself that you’re doing your best, let go of the pressure to do it all. Because you are doing enough. “Put that on repeat,” says Allison. “Write it on your bathroom mirror, take deep breaths and say it again: I am doing enough.” It’s okay if the learning for the day doesn’t work out, if the
TV takes over, and the dinner comes from a box, she adds. It really is okay. “Whatever you are offering your child right now is enough. Whatever the plan is for today, it’s enough. Whatever the plan is for tomorrow, it’s enough. All your child needs is you and trust me, you are doing enough.” So if you have to choose which ball to keep in the air while you let the others fall to the floor, choose connection. Instead of arguing about schoolwork, play a game. Instead of feeling resentful about not getting any help around the house, teach your kids to cook or water the plants. Instead of going stir crazy cooped up inside, get outdoors. As much as possible, look for those easy moments—when, say, bathtime is almost perfect, the story you’re reading aloud catches everyone’s attention and imagination, or when walking the dog is exactly what everyone needs—and let those moments stretch out for as long as they’ll last. Because they, too, shall pass. We need to savour the good moments, even if they’re fleeting, while we wait for that second wind. This month marks our first online-only Island Parent at Home digital edition. In it we will continue to share stories, ideas, news, resources, activities and more. We welcome your stories on ways you are coping during the quarantine, along with any comments to help others in the parenting community. Sue Fast
SUMMER CAMPS Develop skills, meet new friends, explore creativity and experience exciting activities in a fun, safe and positive environment. RECREATION SPORT DEVELOPMENT HIGH PERFORMANCE CLIMBING & OUTDOOR Presented by
Supported by
In the event that our camps program is unable to operate due to concerns related to COVID-19, full refunds will be provided.
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REGISTRATION NOW OPEN See complete camps listings online:
vikescamps.com May 2020 5
@HOME
Keep Calm & Carry On There’s no shortage of resources to help us beat boredom during the COVID crisis. Here to help you keep your kids exploring, creating, reading, calm, connected, entertained is an updated list of—for the most part—free resources for families. The Great Wall of China spans thousands of miles across several provinces of northern China, but now you can take a 6.5-mile virtual hike along the portion of the Wall from Jinshanling to Simatai. thechinaguide.com
Take a 3,000-foot interactive hike of El Capitan in Yosemite National Park via Google Maps and get a glimpse of the views from the top. g.co/treks
Explore Machu Picchu, the 15thcentury Inca citadel and UNESCO World Heritage Site, deemed “one of the New Seven Wonders of the World” and take a 360-degree virtual tour. Watch out for the llamas! youvisit.com/tour/ machupicchu
Spend the day at one of Tofino’s beaches thanks to surf cams at Tofino Harbour, MacKenzie Beach, Chesterman Beach, South Chesterman Beach and Cox Bay. tourismtofino.com Ride a virtual roller coaster at Hagrid’s Magical Creatures Motorbike Adventure, Jurassic World The Ride and Ghost Rider Wooden Roller Coaster. Search YouTube for each ride and hang on tight!
6 Island Parent @Home
The Kiddies Store SINCE
1978
Dedicated to providing Vancouver Island families with high-quality infant and toddler products at affordable prices for over 25 years
Strollers
Safety
Car Seats
Playtime
Furniture
Bath & Health
Baby Carriers
Feeding & Kitchen
Bedding Nursery
Apparel
Now Offering Curb-Side Pickups & Virtual Visits
tjskids.com 250-386-2229
Candlewick Press has just launched a Where’s Waldo-themed web portal with activities for quarantining families. Downloadable activity sheets, book information and videos, and an interactive social media campaign all provide some home-based entertainment. waldo.candlewick.com
Finlayson St.
St.
3045–C Douglas St. Victoria, BC
Current Hours Tuesday – Saturday 10am – 5pm Douglas
The Museum of Art and Photography (MAP) in India wants your help to create the world’s largest digital flower “Bouquet of Hope.” Flowers symbolize hope, love, and courage—something we all need more than ever. Submit your own flower: a photo, a drawing, a painting, or sculpture. It can even be a flower motif made from an object in your home such as food, beads, shoes, pillows. bouquetofhope.in
Larch St.
Entrance off Larch St.
T.J.’s
Fun, Interactive Online Classes and Groups!
Even COVID can’t stop us! Classes Online (live, interactive, local) Childbirth Preparation & Refreshers Baby Care & Infant First Aid Cloth Diapering Workshop Baby-Wearing Workshop Dogs-and-Babies Workshop
Ÿ Ÿ Ÿ Ÿ Ÿ
Groups Online Parents-and-Babies Chat - 1-2pm Mon-Fri Find the link on our website
Retail Store - Online shopping only Support Your Local retailer Ÿ Ÿ Ÿ Ÿ Ÿ
Breastpump sales & rentals Nursing bras and tops Cloth diapers and accessories Baby Carriers Baby Clothes, Books and Toys
975 Fort Street, Victoria motheringtouch.ca - 250-595-4905
May 2020 7
@HOME Wide Open School features a free collection of the best learning experiences and activities for kids, organized by grade band and subject. Curated and coordinated by the experts at Common Sense, Wide Open School is the result of a collaboration among leading publishers, nonprofits, and education and technology companies. wideopenschool.org
Culture Online lets you visit museums, view live music, watch dance, explore science centres, from across British Columbia, all from the comfort of your home. Whether you’re a parent looking for a way to spark home learning, an educator wanting access to new online resources, or someone who just love arts, culture, and heritage, you’ll find a world of culture on CultureOnline.ca.
The Canadian Children’s Book Centre (CCBC) has launched Bibliovideo: a YouTube channel all about Canadian children’s books. Bibliovideo showcases videos and links to resources about Canadian books for children and youth. Enjoy author interviews, read-alongs, how-to demos from illustrators, publishers’ trailers, book reviews, and more. New videos will be added twice weekly. youtube.com/bibliovideo
Learn Big Science for Little Hands at Science World. When you do science with your children, you can share their sense of wonder about the natural world. Science World’s free activities are meant to serve as a starting point for early-childhood scientific exploration. Several are available to download and easy to do at home! scienceworld.ca The Royal BC Museum has launched three new webinar series—RBCM@Home, RBCM@Home (Kids) and RBCM@Outside—so British Columbians can stay connected while staying apart. RBCM@Home (Kids) is much like an online museum playdate. Participants will visit with museum members who are working from home, along with other families from across B.C., to learn and make together. RBCM@Home (Kids) takes place every Wednesday from 11-11:30am. facebook.com/RoyalBCMuseum
West Shore Parks & Recreation staff have deemed May “Physical Literacy Month” and are offering a series of short videos throughout May to showcase what Physical Literacy is, why it is important and how people can become more physically literate. westshorerecreation.ca
Start off your day dancing. Join Laurie Berkner for Live Berkner Breaks on Facebook, most weekdays at 7am. facebook.com/ LaurieBerknerBand
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May 2020 9
@HOME Enter Better Together BC’s first-ever Kitchen Hacks Challenge, a unique and timely video contest open to all BC families. The challenge is simple: share your best kitchen hack with a 60-second video for the chance to win cash prizes from April 22–May 22. The best part of the contest? Families that submit an entry by the deadline will be helping to raise funds for Food Banks BC in support of COVID-19 relief efforts. For every entry received by May 22, BC’s dairy farmers will donate $100 to Food Banks BC. bettertogetherbc.ca/contest/making-a-video
The Kids Write is a place for kids to share their stories about what life is like under lockdown. So that we can learn more about how everyone is doing, and remember that we’re all in this together—no matter where we live. Interested in being part of The Kids Write? To find out the kind of things you can write about and where to send your stories, visit thekidswrite.com.
Cirque du Soleil is offering an escape from everyday life through the delight and whimsy of our shows. CirqueConnect lets fans can watch performance highlights, makeup tutorials, and workout videos; along with stream Cirque music playlists; and download a virtual-reality app. cirquedusoleil.com/cirqueconnect
Mother’s Day is May 10. Team Bright Light Volunteers (BLV) is doing something fun to celebrate all of the mammas in the world. Email a special photo of a mom to celebrate by May 5 to be included in a “Mother’s Day Around the World” tribute on May 10. Email a photo and brief description of what makes the mother figure in your life so special to media@brightlightvolunteers.org.
10 Island Parent @Home
IslandParent.ca
2 0 2 0
Vancouver Island’s Parenting Resource
for 32 Years
Family Resource Guide Family Travel
New Parent Resources
Classes & Programs
Health & Wellness
Family Fun & Entertainment
Check out the 2020 Family Resource Guide Online at IslandParent.ca
Source: Active Healthy Kids, activehealthykids.org
IslandParent.ca
May 2020 11
Combatting Hopelessness in the Age of Bad News W
hether you seek it out or not, bad news is everywhere. We’re constantly bombarded by headlines broadcasting details of the latest catastrophe or impending threat. To make matters worse, social media and the 24-hour news cycle have made it more difficult than ever to come up for air. Be it COVID-19, climate change, or world politics, it’s easy to be overwhelmed by this wave of information on seemingly insurmountable issues. The reality is that this takes a real toll on our mental health. And as hard as it is for adults to cope, it can take an even harder toll on our kids. Instead of focusing on school and friends or what they’ll do this summer, kids are stressing out about intense concerns like social isolation, getting sick, dying, and and uncertain future. How can parents help their kids cope with these stark realities, even if they themselves might feel hopeless and scared too?
Talk about it
While it’s a good idea to regulate your children’s media consumption, this doesn’t mean you should fully sweep these topics under the rug. As a parent, it can be tempting to shield your kids from being hurt, but in this case doing so will not be helpful. The truth is, eventually they will have to face these tough realities. If you have questions about what’s going on in the world, chances are your child does too. It’s okay if you don’t have all the answers—no one does—but it’s crucial to give them a safe space to ask questions and talk through their anxieties. Empathize and validate the emotions they’re experiencing: “I can understand how these times must feel scary and confusing for you. I feel the same way sometimes. You are safe.” Making sure your child knows that they can safely come to you with their concerns ensures that you’re tuned into how they’re coping and whether they’re getting enough support.
Take action
In many cases, the antidote to anxiety is action. Some days it’s hard to convince yourself that there is hope, but this hopelessness is the enemy of change. One of the best ways to combat a loss of hope is to help shift your kids’ focus to the ways they can take action, and lead by example. Find ways for the whole family to get involved, like delivering groceries to an elderly neighbour or filming a short Photos: Unsplash video and emailing it to a friend. Even Too much news is bad news encouraging them to brainstorm some While you may like to stay informed by watching or listening to the news, be caupossible solutions to the issues on their tious of how and when you’re subjecting your teens to it. There’s a difference between mind can help energize them and calm staying informed and being pummeled by negative information on repeat. Small some of their anxiety. amounts of anxiety can encourage kids to take action but when anxiety levels start to creep up, it has an opposite, paralyzing effect. Don’t lose sight of the positives Young people are even less equipped to cope with the grim news cycle than older As Fred Rogers so wisely said, rememgenerations. When good news seems few and far between, be careful not to let them ber to look for the helpers during tough lose hope, especially if your child is sensitive or anxious. Consider choosing a differtimes and tragedies. Humans are biased ent avenue of consuming the news rather than having it on in the house when they’re towards negative information. This isn’t around: read reputable online news sources away from your kids, listen to the radio something to be ashamed of—we all do or podcasts, or record the evening news to watch when they’re not present. These are it subconsciously as a way to try and all effective ways to stay informed while also protecting your teens’ mental wellness. keep ourselves safe—but it is something 12 Island Parent @Home
IslandParent.ca
to be aware of. Break up the bad news by sharing uplifting headlines as often as you can, even if it means taking some time to seek them out. It’s easy to forget the good things when we’re in the middle of difficult times, but it’s key to help your kids understand that this will change. We are working more towards strong communities than ever before, and we’re seeing advances in modern medicine and technology that were inconceivable even a few years ago. This doesn’t mean that our world doesn’t have major problems, but it means that there are a lot of positive changes to be grateful for.
Celebrating 70 years of experiences that last a lifetime!
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Licensed Childcare • Summer Camp • Rentals CampPringle.com • 250-743-2189 • info@camppringle.com
The reality is, we often can’t control these massive, global issues or stop them from happening when they do. As helpless as coming to this realization can make us feel, we do get to choose how we’re going to respond to them, and how we’re going to equip our children to face them. We can empower our kids (and ourselves) to take action on what’s important to us and help them develop into the citizens our future world and community need. Dr. Jillian Roberts is a child psychologist, UVic professor and mother. She is the CEO and Founder of FamilySparks and the author of Kids, Sex and Screens: Raising Strong, Resilient Children in the Sexualized Digital Age. IslandParent.ca
May 2020 13
Pregnancy During a Pandemic Pregnant with twins and now in her second trimester, mom-of-one (soon to be three!) Natasha Mills fills us in on what it’s like to be pregnant during a pandemic.
Q. How are you doing? How has your pregnancy been so far? A. I’m doing as well as I can be expected with twins during a global pandemic! It’s crazy to think that a public health crisis of this magnitude only comes around once in a century, and here I am living that time with two growing babies in my belly. So far the pregnancy has been manageable, although the first trimester had me completely debilitated with morning sickness. Now in the second trimester, I’ve definitely begun eating for three, but am also starting to feel quite uncomfortable. You could say I’m secretly grateful for the ability to stay at home in loungewear as I grow!
Q. Where are you planning to give birth? At home? At the hospital?
A. I’m definitely planning for a hospital birth. The twins will be likely be a C-section as my son was—he turned out to be a very big boy. I have a comforting relationship with my experienced maternity doctors. I know I’ll be in the best hands there.
Q. Who will attend the birth? Partner? Parents? A. With the new hospital rules in place, only one visitor will
be allowed to accompany me and that will be my husband. It’s unfortunate to think our son and both sets of parents will likely be unable to meet the twins until I’m released from hospital 3-4 days later, but I’m hopeful that restriction may change in time for their arrival later this summer.
Q. How do you feel being pregnant right now, amidst everything that’s going on?
A. Bittersweet. It’s almost ideal to be hiding in the home
amidst my growing discomfort, and it takes a bit of the pressure away to be social in setting dates with friends and family. I’ve had the ability to really take in this pregnancy so far on a mental and physical level. Time is flying by, but it has also paradoxically slowed down all the same. On the flip side—as a true introverted extrovert—I miss my fiends and family immensely. I miss hugs and gatherings.
Q. What’s been the biggest challenge of being pregnant during a pandemic?
A. One of the greatest challenges so far is not being able to 14 Island Parent @Home
shop and test out the gear or essentials that I’ll need for twins. I’m someone that likes to touch, see and feel items in person rather than browsing online. There is also, of course, a never ending paranoia of the unknown, and not wanting to get sick with COVID-19 myself. While I know it’s for my protection, it’s been a bit disheartening to take some of my important medical appointments over the phone. With my initial obstetrician check-in, I felt like I was leading the call and it made me nervous that something could get overlooked or left unaddressed. Phone conversations are just not as engaging and reassuring with something as important as pregnancy touch points.
Q. How have you stayed connected to family and friends during distancing? How has this helped you?
A. I’m staying connected to family
and friends mainly through social media, text messages and I’ll do distance walks with my mom to keep my sanity, and to ensure I’m getting fresh air and mobility for the babies. Her presence—even at two meters apart—gets me through any trying time and I’m so grateful that she’ll soon be moving into our tenant suite to support us when the twins are here. My mom is the most compassionate person and I love her so much.
Summer Camps Coed | Ages 6-16
HIGHLAND PACIFIC GOLF VICTORIA, BC
SportsCampsCanada.com
1.844.464.5372
Q. Advice or thoughts to help other expectant parents now?
A. My advice to other expecting
parents at this time would be to find a good routine every day, and to see this unprecedented era as an opportunity to slow down enough for optimal self-care. Try and get yourself organized as best as possible. Utilize free virtual support like prenatal yoga on YouTube, or connect with local mom groups on Facebook. Enjoy the simple things in life again, and be grateful for each day that you are healthy, living quality time with those closest to you. Try and meditate often, and have faith that normalcy will progressively come our way again. Natasha Mills, an Islander of 26 years, enjoys sharing the journey of parenthood and all Vancouver Island has to offer on her lifestyle blog. @mommamillsblog, mommamillsblog.com. IslandParent.ca
May 2020 15
MAYFAMILYCALENDAR For more information and calendar updates throughout the month visit IslandParent.ca
2 SATURDAY & 8 FRIDAY
20 WEDNESDAY
Creative Writing Workshops for Kids
Stay Sane at Home with Kids
National volunteer-led charity, Ripple Foundation, is offering creative writing workshops online with a series of free interactive classes to inspire young Canadians to continue their writing journey at home. Tailored to grades 4-8, the workshops will be taking to Facebook Live on May 2 and May 8 at 1pm. To join the classes, download activity sheets at ripplefoundation.ca.
Join the free online talk Staying Sane at Home with Kids presented by Dr. Deborah MacNamara on May 20, 7-8:15pm on Zoom. Learn how to handle he new realities of caring for our kids and how to help them with their emotions, while trying to preserve ours at the same time. banyen.com/events/macnamara-2020
ing Touch on social media for updates and great ideas for entertaining your kids. motheringtouch.ca
Kids + Parents Cooking Class Delish has put together a livestream on Instagram every weekday at 10am for parents and kids to hop in the kitchen and make a super easy + fun recipe. Recipes and ingredients posted at instagram.com/delish
ONGOING Catch the Kerplunks On Tuesdays at 1pm, Dinah D and Clever Trever of the Kerplunks will host the Fun Farm Family Power Hour. They’ll sing songs, learn how to make super cool juggling cigarboxes, lead a chick parade (or maybe a race!) and have a Tin Toy Rodeo, among other things. You’ll learn how to grow a food plant and lots more surprises. facebook.com/thekerplunks
Maritime Museum of BC
6 WEDNESDAY & 12 TUESDAY Ask the Experts Learn from pediatricians, child psychologists, neuroscientists, educators and parenting experts about the evidence around screen engagement from early childhood through adolescence. Ask questions in this interactive online forum about helping kids develop both on- and off-screen habits. Mid-Childhood (K-Gr8), May 6 at 9-10:30am; Adolescence (13+), May 12 at 9-10:30am. childrenandscreens.com
The Maritime Museum of BC is offering curriculum-based school programs available on rotation Tuesdays and Thursdays, twice each day. $5 per participant; free of charge to any family or individual who is experiencing a financial strain due to the crisis. info@mmbc.bc.ca
Parents-and-Babies Chat Get together with Mothering Touch’s Eva Bild, Monday-Friday, 1-2pm, on Zoom. https://zoom. us/j/157409600. Everyone welcome: babies of all ages, parents and parents-to-be. Follow Mother-
Happy Hour Story Time Josh Gad (aka Olaf) takes to Twitter nightly to read what would be a bedtime story if you lived back east, but out here on the West Coast, it’s a pre-dinner ditty at 4:30pm. twitter.com/joshgad
Code & Create Join the Raspberry Pi Foundation team as they code and create projects at home. Every Monday they share a theme that will inspire kids to have fun, solve problems, and express themselves creatively with technology. Code along with them or create something on your own. raspberrypi.org/at-home/
Join us for Physical Literacy Month! A series of short videos produced by recreation staff will be released throughout the month to showcase what Physical Literacy is, why it is important and how people can become more physically literate. For more information on summer camp registration and stay at home family activities, please visit our website and social media channels:
westshorerecreation.ca Facebook: @westshorerecreation | Instagram: @wsrecreation | Twitter: @wsrecreation 16 Island Parent @Home
IslandParent.ca
10 Tips to Help Kids Learn at Home 1. Digital Quarantine
Consider limiting your children’s cell phones and tablets until their schoolwork is done, so that it can receive their undivided attention. It may not be an option for everybody, but ideally, try to give your kids a dedicated device such as a school laptop for maximum online learning.
2. Make Space for Learning
Your children will achieve their best work in a quiet, comfortable, and dedicated space devoted to learning. Ideally, this will be a different set-up than where they normally play games or watch television.
3. Monitor the Computer Monitor
In this new learning milieu, you can help by monitoring your children’s levels of interest and engagement in adapting to their new schedule and at-home materials. The simplest way to do this? Observation. Look at your child’s eyes to see if they’re following along with the screen. Check if they’re taking notes or zoning out. Ask questions at the end of a lesson. If you find that your child is not engaging with the lessons, don’t be afraid to contact the school district or teachers to better explore the issue. Sometimes, easily remedied technical problems such as bad audio, poor connection, or an unhelpful camera angle can make all the difference.
if they need help. Share your concerns and useful hints. If you need contact information for other parents or resources, reach out to the PAC or your child’s school. It is important that we all work together as a community for the good of our children and families.
8. Plan Your Work & Work Your Plan
Good planning can relieve stress for both children and parents. Check in with your kids about their plans and help them develop a written schedule not only for the day, but for the week as a whole. Help them prioritize and learn to create goals, tasks, and deadlines, just like adults do when they go to work. Tasks that may not have been difficult for them while attending school in person can become more challenging when learning from home, so it’s important to reinforce boundaries and offer incentives for healthy behaviors. To avoid disruption, some after-school activities may be offered via online video apps, Facetime, or Skype.
4. Digital Recess
Make sure that your children take plenty of breaks in order to get physical activity and time away from screens. Set alarms similar to those they would encounter at school and encourage them to get up, get some fresh air, go for a walk or bike ride, or have a snack so that they are not sedentary for the entire day.
5. Facetime
In-person interaction is ideal for kids, but until it’s safe for them to return to school, encourage your children to video chat or text message rather than simply scrolling through social media. Sit your children down for face-to-face conversations about screen time. In order to give them agency, discuss how much time they think is reasonable to spend online and make a “contract,” committing to goals for on-screen vs. off-screen hours.
6. Keep it Old School
Overuse of screen time can have adverse impacts on young brains, so it’s essential in these special circumstances to be extra careful when it comes to the littlest ones. As much as possible, parents should encourage print and book reading. If available, request textbooks from your child’s school along with other print materials in order to offset the amount of online learning they will be doing. Stimulate self-expression by having discussions with your children about what they are doing, and also encourage creative writing and imaginative story telling.
7. We’re All in This Together
Remember that you’re not alone in this journey. Check in with other parents to see what they’ve found effective or to ask IslandParent.ca
9. This Ain’t No Vacation
Even though staying home from school might feel like a holiday, remind your kids that they’re not on vacation. Assignments, grades, requirements, and tests aren’t going away just because classes have moved online.
10. Don’t Forget to Have Fun
Plan off-screen activities for the whole family. Between school and work obligations, it’s rare for parents and children to have this much time together, so turn it into an opportunity for bonding. Write predictions for a TV show that the whole family watches. Organize a tournament, family card games, charades, or chess, or get outside for a hike or walk together after school. Without a doubt, this is a challenging time for parents, teachers, and children alike. Studies show that screen time can have both positive and adverse impacts on kids, and the shift to online education will only increase your child’s time with their devices. Reprinted with permission from the Institute of Digital Media and Child Development’s Children and Screens. childrenandscreens.com. May 2020 17
N ATU R E N OTES
Sense-sational Nature Exploration
O
ur senses are tools we use every day to observe our surroundings. They shape how we experience the world and how we connect with each other. We can intentionally use our senses to get more of the proven benefits of spending time outdoors, including increased focus, boosted mood, reduced stress and greater physical activity. In these uncertain and challenging times, when we have the chance to safely spend time outdoors, focusing on our senses can be a good way to calm a busy mind or explore a familiar place with a new lens. Here are some activities that can help you and your family explore your local park, backyard or greenspace while practicing safe physical distancing.
Sight: Picture Frames
This activity will use a focusing tool— a picture frame—to help you notice composition in nature. You can use an empty picture frame, a piece of construction paper you cut to create a hollow rectangle, or simply make a “frame” with your hands by connecting the tip of your index fingers to the tips of the opposite thumbs. Look through the frame to choose an area that interests you. Experiment with angles and items that are close up or far away. Once you choose your subject blink slowly, scrunching up your 18 Island Parent @Home
eyes, and say “click!” This is your mental photo! Repeat as many times as you like.
Sound: ‘Fist Listen’ and Sound Map
Sounds are useful clues in nature because you’ll often hear something before you see it, if you see it at all! The taptap-tap of a woodpecker, the croak of a pacific tree frog or the nasal peep-peep of a nuthatch are all examples of sounds you might hear in nature. For the “fist listen” simply close your eyes, put your fist in the air and raise a finger to count
every new sound you hear. If you want to add an artistic element to this listening activity try making a sound map. Draw an “X” in the center of a piece of paper to represent where you are. Use symbols, words or drawings to mark where you hear sounds around you. Be creative! How can you show volume and distance of a sound?
Smell: Forest Perfume
The goal of this activity is to highlight the smell of the forest by making a “forest perfume.” Start by smelling the items IslandParent.ca
around you. If you smell something from a living plant, please leave it to grow, but if an item is loose on the ground, pick it up and place it in a small container, empty cup or your cupped hands. Fallen leaves or branches, pieces of bark, bits of soil, fallen moss and lichen are all great items for your perfume (and you’ll be surprised how great they can smell when all mixed together!). When you’re ready, compare your perfume with one another’s or with the smell of the forest. Be sure to find a special spot to empty your perfume before you leave.
Photo: Unsplash
Touch: ‘Tickly Prickly’
This activity is great for experiencing textures and consistencies. Have your child close their eyes while you pick up a few small objects from the ground. Try to get a variety of textures, like a tickly leaf, a smooth stone, a bumpy branch or a squishy piece of lichen. Have your children feel each item with their hands behind their back. When they’re ready, they can open their eyes and try to find the same object they felt behind their back, this time in their surroundings. Once they have a guess, show them the object they felt and see if it matches. You can also do a version of this game by calling out a texture for them to find as you walk along. If you try any of these sensory activities you’re sure to experience nature in a new and special way, and feel inspired to pay close attention to your senses when outside. What do you notice? How does it make you feel? Early summer is the perfect time to explore nature with your senses, but you can also try these activities at any other time of year. Remember that with sensory activities, patience pays off! The longer you pay attention, the more you’ll notice. Looking to get out of the house and try these activities? Please help keep regional parks safe and open by only visiting parks near your home, practicing physical distancing from other visitors, staying home if you’re sick, and only visiting parks with people from your household. For up to date information on CRD Regional Parks, visit crd.bc.ca/covid.
The Freya-Sophia Waldorf
Natural Childhood Store Books, Toys, Clothing ~ Art & Handwork Supplies
250-597-4763 ~ 3, 5380 Hwy. 1 ~ in the Sol-Centre, Duncan
Check facebook for updates and current hours during the COVID crisis. Blessings to every one. Extensive selection of beautiful and inspiring books; Organic wool clothing for babies, children and adults; Wooden toys, puzzles, games, silks, dolls, calendars, cards and prints; Art, painting, knitting, felting and handwork supplies. Committed to providing WaldorfInspired resources to parents, educators, carers, homeschoolers and students of life! We also carry a full line of Uriel Home Remedies & Biodynamic Preparations. Online orders and no-contact pickup: email freyasophiawaldorfstore@gmail.com
Emma Jane Vignola is a CRD Regional Parks naturalist.
IslandParent.ca
May 2020 19
Tips from a PE Teacher Dad to Keep Active in Self-isolation As an elementary school PE teacher—and dad—I know how important it is for kids to get lots of active play, every day. Here’s how I’m keeping my four-year-old active during this unprecedented time: 1. Keep it simple
We walk daily. Rain or shine. They say adults go for walks but children go on adventures. During these adventures, we’ve looked for animals in the forest, picked up natural loose parts to make a magic “potion,” and we’ve done a few window walks, looking for hearts. My toddler has also ridden her bike, and created her own obstacle course.
2. Learn new skills or improve a skill
When we go outside to play, I like to let my daughter lead the activities. This improves her engagement in staying active because the ideas come from her and not her dad. I like to keep the garage door open when we’re outside, and she’ll go in and choose what she wants to play with. Lately, she’s been wanting to learn how to hula hoop or skateboard (we work on her balance while she’s holding my hands).
Suite 228, 102–15910 Fraser Highway, Surrey BC V4N 0X9
20 Island Parent @Home
Here are other ideas that you could try with your children (you’ll get more engagement from them if you also give it a try!): • Learn how to juggle a soccer ball. If that seems too difficult just now, you can start by keeping a balloon up with your feet. • Improve your basketball dribbling skills. Try using both hands. • If your access to sports equipment is limited, take the time to improve your flexibility. • Challenge your family with minuteto-win-it activities (How many jumping jacks can you do in a minute? How many times can you successfully attempt a bottle flip?).
3. Try an online activity video
Sometimes it’s fun to just follow along with a video on YouTube. We’ve noticed that when we ask her if she wants to try a video, she’ll often say no. However, if we just put the video on and start working out she’ll eventually join us.
4. Your physical education teacher can help!
Don’t be shy to send an email to your children’s PE teachers. We love to hear from the kids we teach! Or, if you search for #HPEatHome on Twitter, you’ll find plenty of amazing ideas from PE teachers all over the world. For more ideas, you can join the Active at Home Facebook group. David Benay is a PE teacher and father of one. Reprinted with permission from Active for Life, a national initiative created to help parents raise physically literate children. activeforlife.com. IslandParent.ca
DA D S PE A K
A Simple Reminder
B
ack when our baby boy was a new addition in our house, I was on that horrendous newborn schedule, where some mornings I found myself up and at ’em at 5:45 a.m. or so, wandering around the house, stunned and confused, holding the baby, who was really insistent that we get the day started at this early hour. Why exactly? No idea, but I did know that we were all just tired as hell. I told myself going into this one, though, that I was just going to enjoy those moments. I actually look back on similar moments with the first two kids with an incredible fondness and nostalgia. With my first, it was wandering around Beacon Hill Park and the Fairfield area super early on fall mornings, spotting wildlife and enjoying the scenery. With my second, it was the Hillside area, early summer mornings, watching the elderly go through other peoples’ recycling, just enjoying being out and about in the dead quiet. Even though I felt like I was floating because I was so tired it was pretty amazing. With my third, I’m still in the Hillside area, although I seem to be forced outside less with this one; it’s more waking up and brewing a coffee and playing inside. When he was just months old and napped, I made the decision to either get some shut-eye or get some peaceful work or household-duty catch-up time in.
I’m not a smart man, so I usually chose to stay awake. It was often with him on me, the little bundle of warmth and coziness snuggled up to me as I somehow managed to pull out my laptop and balance the coffee on the side of the couch and start typing away at some work, sometimes even this very column. Thing is, as cozy and coffee-commercial-esque as this sounds, it wasn’t usually exactly as great as that in the heat of the moment. My stomach was often a bit off due to the weird waking time. Occasionally we’d finally get perfectly cozy and I’d have to wake him to go to the bathroom, then we’d start it all over again. Sometimes I was just too tired to really properly appreciate it. But, I told myself I was going to enjoy it, so, man, I tried. And I succeeded sometimes. My older ones are 8 and 11 now. I know you just want to punch a dude in the face when he says this, but it really does go so fast. Mainly because you’re underslept, stressed out, and worrying about finances most of the time, but, it’s true: time really does go fast. My girl is a full-on pre-teen now. The boy is turning into a grown-up before my eyes, too. At the time, it was hard to appreciate being woken up early with them, to be totally honest, because I was new
to all this. I didn’t realize how fleeting it all is. So, a simple reminder: just enjoy it. Forget about the finances for a while. Don’t obsess over how tired you are. There’s no gas left in the tank, I get it, but just power through anyway. Instead of thinking about the bad aspects—and I get it, there are bad aspects—of your early wakings, of any aspects of being a parent through the 18 or so years the little ones are under your roof, just focus on the good stuff. It deserves your attention. My oldest occasionally hurls something a bit hurtful at me when upset these days. Pre-teen stuff. Sometimes it’s charming, but sometimes it can hurt. Recently, she told me in no uncertain terms that I’ve been grumpy and stressed out lately. It was a good wake-up call, because one day she’ll be grown up and out of the house and I’ll look back on every grumpy moment and think about what a waste of this amazing time those grumpy moments were. So, a simple reminder: enjoy every moment. It’s really hard, but enjoy every moment.
Greg Pratt is the father of two children and a local journalist and editor. His writing has appeared in, among other places, Today’s Parent, Wired, Revolver and Douglas.
May 2020 21
A Mother’s Growing Pains
I
raised my boys to be confident. From the moment they were born, I had a vision, one in which my children were able to take risks, find and respect their boundaries. I wanted them to walk into a room and feel comfortable talking to people they had never met and to walk up to a child on the playground to introduce themselves. I wanted them to rise up to a challenge and work hard to overcome it. So, I encouraged them to think for themselves. From early in their toddler years, I asked their opinions about things, let them explore the world through play and held myself back when
they encountered a problem. One might say, at times, I pushed my vision a little too hard. When my children were young and they struggled with something, their shoe was lost, their brother took their toy, their friend hurt their feelings, I would ask them, “What do you think you should do about that?” I didn’t want to be the source of all their solutions. I wanted them to understand that they were capable of solving their own problems. One day, though, when my youngest son was three years old, or so, he climbed too high on the playground apparatus.
It was one of those Spider Man nets that peaks like a mountain and he had maneuvered his way to the very top. I stood by and watched him, but said nothing. Once conquering this mountain, he realized that coming down is often trickier than scaling up. He stood still for a moment. I could see he was afraid, but was considering his options. Then, instead of crying in fear, he yelled, in a trembling voice, “Mommy, I don’t know how to solve this problem!” The other mothers at the park looked at me, strangely, as I laughed and climbed up to guide my son to the bottom of the
web. I recognized it was not a common thing for a toddler to say and wondered if, perhaps, my son would prefer a mother who was somewhat more coddling. In those days, I was the centre of my children’s world. I was their sun, their little orbits always circling me. It was exhausting, but most days, I truly enjoyed it. They were my life’s purpose, my partners in crime and the little monkeys that were constantly under my feet, causing me to trip and swear. We played together, read together and learned together. As they got older, my confident boys began to venture out into the world with more and more independence. They asked to walk to school without me. Suggested that I come on the next field trip, but not this one. Went to birthday parties and play dates where parental attendance was unnecessary. I began to miss them. And, I questioned my purpose. If my boys don’t need me every single moment of every single day, what was I to do with myself? I’m not going to lie, that was a difficult time. I was bored, not used to having alone time, and I became resentful. My boys would play with their friends, watch sports with their stepdad and kick a soccer ball around with each other. But, what about me? Was I only good for cooking and cleaning? I remember yelling on more than one occasion, “I don’t work for you people!” It felt as if I didn’t know how to fit in with my own family. Growing pains suck, especially for moms. Over time, I realized my boys were becoming exactly who I want them to be. The reason they were out, experiencing the world without me, was because they didn’t need me to hold their hands. They were the confident, social, gentlemen I had raised them to be. They knew they could explore, while still respecting boundaries, like when they were little. They knew I would always be just off to the side, watching supportively, there if they needed me. Now, their playground was just a lot larger. What I have learned is this: to enjoy quality time, over quantity time. I am also learning to spend my own time engaging in hobbies and people which fulfill me. At this moment, both of my children are upstairs in their bedrooms, listening to music and texting their friends. Most likely, I won’t see them until it’s bedtime. They are being teenagers, as they should. So, I am sitting in a candle lit room, IslandParent.ca
with a glass of wine on the table beside me, writing. Because, that’s what makes my heart happy. If my one of my children comes downstairs, I will set aside my laptop, turn off my phone and be present with my son, listening to whatever he wants to share with me. I am holding space for my children, ready when they need me. I treasure moments with them, now. Hugs that they give, stories that they tell. I try to find common hobbies that we enjoy together—working out, hiking, wakeboarding. I plan date nights with them, adventures we can experience together. Here’s the thing, though. These moments will also be gone, before I know it, before I am ready. Soon, they will be having more adventures with friends and dating
their peers instead of their mother. They will move out of my house, establishing independence and living life on their own terms. The quantity of moments with my children is dwindling and I feel it. I will need to be increasingly mindful to make the small moments matter. Now, comes the choice every parent faces. I can either be sad, mournful and purposeless, or I can be proud of my sons, who want to live their best lives, as they should. For, they are the embodiment of confidence and independence, just as I taught them to be. Kelly Cleeve is a writer, speaker and educator. She has a Masters Degree in human development. More importantly, she is the proud mother of two beautiful boys.
Closed to the Public But Open for Website Business
Toys, games and puzzles for all ages
koolandchild.com
#102 – 2517 Bowen Rd, Nanaimo 888.390.1775 May 2020 23
Eggs, Crepes & Greens
T
his is the time of year, there’s an abundance of spring greens. Sweet, flavourful and packed full of nutrients, they are farm-fresh and delicious. In the spring, over-wintered kale, cabbage and other greens start to send out flowering shoots. When picked young, these shoots are soft and succulent. You can eat the whole stock, not just the flowering tops. Other fresh greens found this time of year include: leeks, kale, chard, collards and mustard greens. You can find local spring greens at farmers’ market stands or smaller grocery stores that have a focus on local produce. Also, anyone in the Victoria area can sign up for the Good Food Box (thegoodfoodbox.ca), which has a strong partnership with local farmers. They often feature fresh greens in the spring. Here are three quick, easy and delicious recipes that are perfect for celebrating fresh spring greens. My favourite spring greens are cabbage shoots and kale shoots, however, feel free to use leeks or leafy greens in these recipes.
24 Island Parent @Home
IslandParent.ca
Photo: Unsplash
W H AT’ SF O R D I N N E R
Simple Savoury Crepes (Total Prep Time: 30 minutes) Crepes are a lot easier than you might think. They are basically a thin pancake and just as quick and simple to make. The trick is to make small crepes, about the size of a typical pancake, rather than the giant crepes you get in the restaurants. Small crepes are easy to flip, fill and serve. Crepe 1⁄4 cup butter 1 cup flour (white or whole wheat) 11⁄4 cup milk 2 eggs Pinch of salt Filling 2 tbsp olive oil 2 cloves of garlic 3 cups of fresh greens (kale, spinach, chard, leeks) A pinch of salt Freshly ground black pepper Slices of cheese 1. Start by mixing the crepe batter, as the flour needs to soak for at least 15 minutes before cooking. For a particularly quick dinner, mix the crepe batter up to two days in advance and store it in the fridge. 2. Melt the butter. Mix together all the ingredients for the crepe batter. I recommend adding the milk last as cold milk causes the butter to harden before it’s mixed in to the batter. The crepe batter will be very liquidy. 3. Prepare the filling while the crepe batter soaks. 4. Wash and chop up the fresh greens. You want them to be in bite-sized pieces. 5. Finely dice the garlic. 6. Heat the olive oil in a frying pan on medium. Add the garlic and greens and saute for a few minutes until the greens have started to wilt. Lightly season with salt and pepper, and reduce the heat while you prepare the crepes. 7. Stir the crepe batter before cooking. Pour a 1⁄4 cup of batter onto a hot griddle. Flip it over when the edges have started to dry out and the centre of the crepe is bubbling. Cook it for another minute, then move it to a plate. It should take about 3 minutes to cook a crepe. 8. Fill the crepes with a spoonful of cooked greens and top with a slice of cheese. 9. Either serve immediately or place a few filled crepes on a cookie sheet, then warm them up in the oven when you’re ready to serve dinner.
IslandParent.ca
Pasta with Fresh Greens (Prep Time: 20 minutes) Pasta is my go-to for a quick weeknight meal. I particularly love making pasta with fresh greens because it so simple, yet tastes deliciously fancy. Pine nuts are creamy and delicious, however, they are also hard to find and expensive. Walnuts are an earthy substitute, and my children actually prefer sunflower seeds. The goal is to add a nutty crunch along with a bit of protein. 1 box of pasta (454g) cup of pine nuts (or walnuts, sunflower seeds) 2 tbsp olive oil 2 tbsp butter 4 cloves of garlic 3 cups of fresh greens (kale, spinach, cabbage shoots) 1 tsp salt, to taste 1⁄2 tsp ground black pepper 1⁄4 cup of Parmesan cheese 1⁄4
1. Start by bringing a large pot of water to boil. Cook the pasta according to the directions on the package. The greens can be prepared while the water boils and the pasta cooks. 2. If the pine nuts (walnuts or sunflower seeds) aren’t toasted, start by quickly toasting them in a large frying pan. As soon as they start to brown, transfer them to a bowl. 3. Heat the olive oil and butter in the hot frying pan. Reduce to low heat while you prepare the vegetables. 4. Finely dice the garlic. 5. Wash and chop the fresh greens into bite-sized pieces. 6. Add the garlic and the greens to the frying pan. Saute until the garlic is cooked and the greens are wilted. 7. Season with the salt and pepper. It taste extra salty as it is providing all of the seasoning for the pasta. 8. When the pasta is cooked, toss it with the wilted greens. 9. Serve the pasta with a sprinkle of toasted nuts and a bit of freshly grated cheese.
Kid-Simple Omelettes (Total Time: 20 minutes) Omelettes are surprisingly easy to make. In fact, my eleven-year-old decided to make them for dinner one night, and although they weren’t perfectly beautiful they were delicious! For One Omelette 2 eggs 2 tbsp of milk 1⁄4 tsp salt Melted butter Filling 1 batch of cooked greens 1 cup of grated cheese 1. Prepare the greens the same way as in the crepe recipe. The greens should be fully cooked before you start on the omelettes because the eggs cook fairly quickly. 2. Beat 2 eggs in a bowl with 2 tbsp of milk and 1⁄4 tsp of salt. 3. Heat an 8-inch frying pan on medium. When it is hot, add a small amount of butter to coat the bottom of the pan. 4. Pour in the beaten eggs and whisk slightly until it starts to thicken like scrambled eggs. Then stop beating to let the bottom set. At this point add a spoonful of cooked greens and some grated cheese in the middle of the omelette. 5. While the omelette finishes cooking, beat the eggs, milk and salt for the next omelette. 6. When the top of the omelette is fully cooked and the bottom is starting to brown, fold the omelette, either in half or thirds, and serve. 7. Melt a bit of butter in the pan and start cooking the next omelette. 8. Continue cooking until you have an omelette for each person.
Emillie Parrish writes from Victoria and Saturna Island. She is the author of the Pacific Northwest lifestyle blog BerriesAndBarnacles.com. May 2020 25
K I DS ’ R E A DS
Into the Realm of Books
N
eed a little bit of a break from reality? Here is a list of books that will all take you to a different world or on a fantastic adventure. The first book is called Queen of the Sea by Dylan Meconis (Walker Books, 2019). It’s a gorgeous graphic novel about a young girl named Margaret who lives in a convent on an island off the coast Albion. Her idyllic world is turned upsidedown when she learns that she wasn’t just some random child abandoned on the island; she, like most of its inhabitants, is a prisoner by order of the king.
re-telling of Hansel and Gretel, but the two children are not listening to the narrator in the slightest. They point out the ridiculousness of leaving a bread crumb trail during a famine—if they had some, they most certainly would have eaten them--deny the idea that they’re parents
could be trying to abandon them--their father is just bad with directions when he went to get them blankets, and cannot comprehend that the woman who lives in the candy house could be evil. Kids and parents can laugh along with Gretel and Hansel’s antics as they retell their story their own way. For ages 3 to 7.
Inspired by the early years of Queen Elizabeth I, this story will sweep readers along in a tale of political intrigue and secrets as Margaret tries to discover who she really is and what crime a baby could have committed to land her in prison for life. For ages 10 to 14. The next book is for a younger audience. It’s called It’s Not Hansel and Gretel by Josh Funk and illustrated by Edwardian Taylor (Two Lions, 2019). This is a 26 Island Parent @Home
Moving on to Interrupting Chicken and the Elephant of Surprise by David Ezra Stein (Candlewick Press, 2018). This is a book parents can definitely relate to right now as they struggle to help their children with school work. Chicken needs to find the elephant of surprise in three stories for her homework and she enlists her father’s help to find them. However, Papa is pretty certain that the teacher said element of surprise. Chicken doesn’t agree and sets out to find the poor lost and lonely elephant in the pages
of three very well-known folk and fairy tales. Stein’s illustrations are brilliant. He intermixes the old style of illustrations that were common to fairy tales with his bold and brilliant illustrations that really make the surprises pop out of the page. For ages 3 to 7. Next up is Malamander by Thomas Taylor and illustrated by Tom Booth (Walker Books, 2019). In this delightfully dark and creepy tale, Herbie, the young Lost-and-Founder of the Grand Nautilus Hotel ends up with more than he was expecting when a girl dives into his cubbyhole. Her name is Violet Parma and she was lost at the hotel twelve years ago when her parents vanished into the sea. Now she wants Herbie’s help becoming found. However, not only did her parents disappear before Herbie started working at the hotel—and possibly before he was born, he’s a little unsure of his age—there is also a creepy man with a hook for a hand who seems determined to catch Violet, and if that’s not bad enough, the malamander has woken up from its sleep and it slithering through town at night. For ages 8 to 12.
Finally, there is The Button Book by Sally Nicholls and illustrated by Bethan Woollvin (Tundra Books, 2019). On each page of this colourful book there is a button. Each button does something new. Some make music, some make raspberries, and some cause tickle fights. If you’re feeling up to it, you could act out each action with your kids as your press your way through this book. For ages 3 to 7. While this time of quarantine might be wearing you and your children down, I hope you’re able to find some laughter and adventure within the pages of a book. Because while we may not be able to travel, our minds can still run wild and free. Christina Van Starkenburg is a freelance writer and mother of two. Despite all of the books that flow through the house for this column, her boys still have their favourites and she’s read them a million times. Christina finds it very exciting when something new catches their eye, and she loves to share those treasures with you. christinavanstarkenburg.com. IslandParent.ca
May 2020 27
PRESCHOOL&CHILDCAREDIRECTORY ESQUIMALT
SAANICH
Island Kids Academy Esquimalt.....250-381-2929 High quality child care (ages 1-5). Enriched Curriculum. Includes Music Classes and Character Development using the Virtues Project. Wait list being taken. Islandkids.ca.
Camosun College Child Care Services.......................................... 250-370-4880 Quality licensed facilities on both campuses providing children, newborn to 5 years, with rich early learning experiences in a learn through play environment. camosun.ca/childcare.
La Pré-Maternelle Appletree Preschool........................ 250-479-0292 A French Immersion Preschool Program. 30 months to school age. Licensed Christian centre. prematernelleappletree.com.
Carrot Seed Preschool...................250-658-2331 Where children can discover, imagine, construct and learn through play. Wondrous natural playground. carrotseedpreschool.com.
If you’d like to be listed in the Preschool & Child Care Directory, please email linda@islandparent.ca
METCHOSIN Metchosin Cooperative Preschool...................................... 250-478-9241 Play Explore Learn and Grow in beautiful rural Metchosin. Morning programs available for 3 and 4 year olds. Contact our ECEs at metchosinpreschool@gmail.com.
• Licensed programs, for children 3–5 years • Flexible part-time schedules • Supported spaces available • 2, 3 and 4 hour morning or afternoon classes Encouraging your child’s development and learning through play and exploration Fullobeans.ca 250-360-1148 E: fullobeans@snplace.org
OAK BAY
Island Montessori House........... 250-592-4411 Inclusive, integrated and nurturing Preschool and Before/After School Care programs. Lovely rural setting with a focus on nature and outdoor environmental activities. islandmontessori.com.
Oak Bay Preschool........................250-592-1922 Oak Bay Preschool is a co-op preschool, using a playbased curriculum with qualified ECE and ECEA. We use a balance of indoor and outdoor classrooms to enrich your child’s preschool experience. Learn more at oakbaypreschool.com. Recreation Oak Bay.......................250-370-7200 Offers full day Daycare and half day Preschool for children ages 3-5 years old. Before and after school care for Willows Elementary and afterschool care for Campus View Elementary is also offered. Please contact childcare@oakbay.ca or call for more information.
Child Care
Resource & Referral Funded by the Province of BC
Your community’s best source of child care information and resources. 28 Island Parent @Home
Pre-School Junior Kindergarten PacificChristian.ca 250-479-4532 Educational Excellence to the Glory of God
Ready Set Grow Preschool............. 250-472-1530 Join our learning through play preschool located in Hillcrest Elem. Our caring ECEs offer an enriched Program for 3-4 hour, 2-5 days a week and help with kindergarten transition. heoscmanager@gmail.com. St. Joseph’s Early Learning Centre... 250-479-1237 A Christian childcare centre offering daycare and preschool programs for 3-5 year olds. Children learn through play-based and emergent curriculum in a warm and nurturing environment. St. Margaret’s School Jr. Kindergarten................................. 250-479-7171 Apply now for our Early Learning (JK and Kindergarten) Programs. Early learning at SMS is a curriculum-based program for 3 and 4 year olds. admissions@stmarg.ca. Wiseways Child Care Centre.......250-477-1312 Established, quality, licensed, Christian centre for 3-5 year olds. Experienced ECEs, cheerful spacious facilities, large playground. Subsidized fees welcome. Call for a tour. Wisewaysvictoria.com.
Looking for child care? Need help with the Affordable Child Care Benefit? Taking care of children? Need child care training? Call your local Child Care Resource & Referral for free referrals and resources. Victoria & Gulf Islands: 250-382-7000 or 1-800-750-1868 Sooke: 250-642-5152 West Shore: 250-940-4882 Cowichan Valley: 250-746-4135 local 231 PacificCare (Ladysmith north): 250-756-2022 or 1-888-480-2273
gov.bc.ca/ChildCareResourceReferralCentres IslandParent.ca
SIDNEY Sidney Preschool............................. 250-655-3333 We are a licensed co-operative preschool with a philosophy of learning through play! Four and six hour programs available for children ages 2.5-5. Celebrating 48 years! sidneypreschool.com.
VICTORIA
Victoria Montessori...................... 250-380-0534 Unique, innovative learning environment combining the best of Montessori and Learning Through Play. Open year round. 30mths–K. victoriamontessori.com.
VIEW ROYAL Island Kids Academy View Royal...250-727-2929 High quality child care (ages 1-5). Enriched Curriculum. Includes Music Classes and Character Development using the Virtues Project. Wait list being taken. Islandkids.ca.
v Comprehensive programs for Preschool through Grade 10 v Delivering academic excellence through music, dance, drama and visual arts v Outstanding educators, locations and facilities
JLC Victoria Japanese Preschool The only Japanese Immersion Preschool on the Island opens at Craigflower Schoolhouse. Offering the best environment for preschoolers to learn Japanese language and culture as natural as possible. jlcvictoria.com.
www.ArtsCalibre.ca 250.382.3533 Castleview Child Care................... 250-595-5355 Learning Through Play & Discovery. Licensed nonprofit, ECE staff. Since 1958. Morning or full-time care. castleviewchildcarecentre.com. Centennial Day Care..................... 250-386-6832 Exceptional childcare and education 35+ years. Nature inspired, play based program. NEW central, “green” building. centennialdaycare.ca. Christ Church Cathedral Childcare.......................................250-383-5132 ECE and specialist teachers provide an outstanding all day licensed program for 2.5–5 year olds at our Fairfield and NEW Gordon Head (Fall 2019) locations. cathedralschool.ca. The Sir James Douglas Playschool................................250-389-0500 Fun, creative and educational ECE program for 3-5 year olds to grow and develop life long skills. Come play and learn in our bright and modern centre in Fairfield. sjdoutofschoolclub.com.
Queen of Angels Early Learning Centre..................... 250-701-0433 Our Centre is a lively, happy place for 3-5 year olds where children are encouraged to be confident, independent learners in a nurturing and safe environment. Sunrise Waldorf School Preschool....250-743-7253 In a warm environment, this nature and play-based program enlivens and nurtures the growing child. sunrisewaldorfschool.org.
NANAIMO
Junior Kindergarten to Grade 12
Learn more today! 250-390-2201 AspengroveSchool.ca N A N A I M O ’ S J K–1 2 I N T E R N AT I O N A L B ACC A L AU R E AT E WO R L D S C H O O L
DUNCAN Duncan Christian School Early Learning Centre.....................250-746-3654 The first step in providing your child with everything they need to become a confident, capable learner in a Christ-centered, community focussed environment. International Montessori Academy of Canada......................... 250-737-1119 Elementary K–12. Offers an enriching environment for preschool children 2-4.9 years with potty training. Nurturing young minds, keeping the spirit free. intmontessori.ca. Queen Margaret’s School................ 250-746-4185 Early Childhood Education Program. Co-ed nurturing curriculum to develop the whole child. Healthy snacks and lunch provided. qms.bc.ca.
QUALICUM BEACH Little Star Children’s Centre.......... 250-752-4554 Little Gems Infant and Toddler Care..................................250-228-5437 Mother, Daughter owned and operated. Earth friendly preschool education inspired by nature. Infused with fun and creative daily yoga practices! Licensed group care. Enthusiastic ECE instructors. littlestardaycare.ca.
PORT ALBERNI John Paul II Catholic School...........250-723-0637 “Where children grow and learn through play.” We provide a program that will inspire development physically, socially, emotionally, cognitively, creatively and spiritually.
Nestled on 4 acres of lush west coast forest, our Award winning, Nature based program will not disappoint! While firmly embracing the Reggio-Emila (Italy) Philosophy our dedicated team of educators use the environment as the third teacher as we encourage your child throughout their day. Our purpose built facilities have been handmade using the trees from our forest. We have recently expanded to our new Spirit Bear Lodge located right next door! Programs for Infants/Toddlers/Pre-school Age.
lexieslittlebears.ca 250-590-3603
BC Award of Excellence in Childcare & Prime Minister’s Award of Excellence in Early Childhood Education.
IslandParent.ca
May 2020 29
H A PPYFA M I LI ES H E A LTH YFA M I LI ES
Healthy Families, Happy Families
Child, Youth & Family Public Health South Island Health Units
Esquimalt Gulf Islands
250-519-5311 250-539-3099
Peninsula Saanich Saltspring Island Sooke Victoria West Shore
250-544-2400 250-519-5100 250-538-4880 250-519-3487 250-388-2200 250-519-3490
(toll-free number for office in Saanichton)
Central Island Health Units
Duncan Ladysmith Lake Cowichan Nanaimo Nanaimo Princess Royal Parksville/Qualicum Port Alberni Tofino
250-709-3050 250-755-3342 250-749-6878 250-755-3342 250-739-5845 250-947-8242 250-731-1315 250-725-4020
North Island Health Units
Campbell River Courtenay Kyuquot Health Ctr ‘Namgis Health Ctr Port Hardy
250-850-2110 250-331-8520 250-332-5289 250-974-5522 250-902-6071
islandhealth.ca/our-locations/ health-unit-locations Changes with BC Medical Services Plan premiums mean that families eligible for partial payment of some medical services and access to some income-based programs now must apply for Supplementary Benefits through the Government of BC. Applications can be done online and take approximately 15 minutes. Families who previously qualified for MSP Premium Assistance should not need to re-apply if taxes are completed yearly. It is advised to confirm coverage before proceeding with treatment to avoid paying out of pocket.
For more information, visit gov.bc.ca/gov/ content/health/health-drug-coverage/msp/ bc-residents/benefits/services-covered-bymsp/supplementary-benefits
30 Island Parent @Home
The Myths & Facts of Speech & Hearing
M
ay is Better Speech and Hearing month. This presents an opportunity for communication health professionals to increase public awareness about communication health in general, as well as the impact of communication impairments, and the importance of detection and intervention. It is also a perfect opportunity to talk about commonly held misconceptions related to communication development. Have you ever heard someone tell you that teaching a child multiple languages can “confuse” them? Or that using two languages with your child can cause a language delay? Sadly, there are many misunderstandings when it comes to bilingual or multilingual language development in children. Many people think multiple language learning can have a negative impact on a child’s communication development overall. Well, I am here to tell you otherwise! First, I’d like to clarify what I mean when I talk about “multilingual language development.” Well, it’s exactly as it sounds—it refers children learning more than one language. Families may go about this in many different ways. Some families use two languages from birth or the or the very early years and children grow up learning two languages at the same time. We call this simultaneous acquisition. Some families use one language at home, and their child will learn the second language after their first language is well established, often coinciding with the start of daycare/preschool or kindergarten. We call this sequential acquisition, and it is common for families who have immigrated from a country where there is a different dominant language. When a family speaks one language in the home different from the dominant language spoken in the community, we call the home language their heritage language. An increasingly multilingual community gives us an opportunity to talk about myths and misconceptions surrounding multilingual language acquisition.
Myth: Learning two or more languages is too confusing for young children. It is better to speak only English with them even if you are not fluent because that is what they will end up using at school and in the community anyways. Fact: Children all over the world learn multiple languages without getting “confused”. It is best to use the language(s) you are most comfortable speaking and understanding so that you are better able to provide high-quality language input for your child. Speaking the language you are most comfortable using generally means using the language in which you are a fluent speaker. For those fluent in more than one language, this might mean using multiple languages with their children from birth, and their children will grow up as simultaneous language learners. For those fluent in only one language, this may mean speaking a heritage language in the home, and their children can be a sequential language learner. Remember, both learning styles are wonderful and neither is better than the other! Instead, it is better to focus on providing your child with good language input and high quality interactions/conversations, no matter what language you use. This will have the most positive impact on their communication development. I believe this would be very difficult to do using a language in which you are not comfortable speaking or understanding. When we speak in a fluent language, we are more likely to use a larger vocabulary, correct grammar, and more varied sentence structures. We are likely to communicate more in general. All of these things have a positive impact on our children’s communication development. Furthermore, when we engage in conversations using our fluent language, we are better able to provide feedback, build on what our children are saying, and correct our children’s grammar misuses in a natural way.
IslandParent.ca
Myth: Learning two languages will cause a communication delay. Fact: While there are sometimes minor differences in language learning for multilingual children, learning two languages itself does NOT cause a language delay. There are many cognitive benefits to learning multiple languages!
It should be noted, though, that there are some minor but noticeable differences in the patterns of typical language learning for multilingual children. It is common for these children to mix up grammar rules, or to use words from both languages in the same sentence. We call this code switching. It is actu-
ing any delays in their heritage language, children are expected to “catch up” to their peers and become fluent in their second language. If there is a language delay in the heritage language, we expect to see some delays in the second language as well. But, if language skills are within the expected range for their heritage language, children should “catch up” to the language level of their peers after a period of time. One thing that might occur for these language learners is a “silent period” lasting several months when they first start learning their new language. During this period, they may not speak as much as they usually do. While it may feel concerning, it is typical of sequential language learners, and it should resolve. As well, a sequential language learner may use incorrect grammar and short sentences initially. While perhaps not typical for their age if they were monolingual, it is typical for a child who is learning a second language. Some mistakes will be due to the influence of their first language, but many mistakes will follow a similar pattern of development as monolingual children at a similar stage of language learning. As a child has more experience speaking and listening in their second language, they will become more fluent and their errors will decrease. Myth: If your child is learning multiple languages and they have a developmental, cognitive, or communication delay, you should stop using your heritage language and just focus on English. Fact: All children, including those with developmental, cognitive, or communication delays, are capable of learning multiple languages. Many children with delays have learned a second language successfully!
Overall, bilingual children meet their communication milestones within the same expected range as monolingual children. They start using their first words around the same time as monolingual children, and develop their grammar in a similar way and around the same timelines as well. Research has shown that children who know more than one language have an improved ability to learn new words and even more languages. They are shown to be more skilled at problem solving, and have an improved ability to manage their attention. IslandParent.ca
ally a typical part of bilingual language learning and is not a sign of a language delay or “confusion.” Code switching will decrease over time, and children will eventually stop as they become more experienced in both languages. Myth: Children who don’t speak English when they first enter school will struggle in the classroom and won’t be able to “catch up” to their peers. Fact: Sequential language learning is a common way for children to learn multiple languages. If they are not experienc-
So remember, any child can learn multiple languages, and can do so without harming their communication or cognitive development. In fact, it’s quite the opposite! What is most important is ensuring your child receives good language models and high quality interactions in whatever language(s) you choose. Caitlin Bittman is a Speech-Language Pathologist at Esquimalt Health Unit.
CHILD YOUTH & FAM I LY PUBLIC HEALT H
May 2020 31
Talking to Kids About Sex “H
ow can I help my parents become comfortable enough to talk with me about sex?” This was a question I was recently asked by a high school student. Inspired and humbled by the student’s sincere desire to have better communication with their parents, I also felt slightly heavy hearted that this youth felt responsible for growing their parents’ comfort level. It is not uncommon that many parent and adult allies lacked their own opportunities as young people to have these conversations with the adults in their lives. Often if a talk did occur, it centred around what not to do or all of the things that could go wrong. This means many adults are starting these conversations with little or no practice. Talk about the ultimate cold call! Whether you’re beginning with a two–month-old or supporting a worldly 12-year-old through their 32 Island Parent @Home
first crush, here are some ideas for growing your own comfort.
Use Your Words
Begin with your children when they are young by using ALL of the words to describe their bodies and their functions. Diaper changes, bathing, and bedtime routines are ideal opportunities to use the language in low pressure and simple settings on a daily basis. Do the words vulva, scrotum, penis, and labia roll off your tongue easily or do you suddenly feel like you have a mouth full of marbles as you try to use them? If you were only given permission to describe some parts of your body (elbow, knee, eyebrow) but not the most personal parts such as your genitals; it can feel awkward and unfamiliar when you begin to use the words. No wonder, it seems easier to default to play language (front bum, pee pee, etc)
or skip it all together. Practice the words when you’re walking the dog or sitting in traffic. You’ll be surprised by how quickly it feels normal to say vulva, scrotum, and penis.
Use Books
Often a lack of comfort with sexuality conversations stems from a fear of not knowing what to say, how to say it or how much to say. The great news is there are fantastic books which expertly frame the information in accurate and enjoyable ways. There are few books more exciting to a child (as well as many adults!) than body and relationship books. Depending on the learning level, needs and curiosities of your child, you might approach sexuality through a body science lens with a “know your systems” focus; for example, through a more inclusive “what makes a baby?” book, or IslandParent.ca
for older youth with a puberty focused question and answer book. You can read the books together, which builds intimacy and safety and the biggest bonus is that it gives you a natural script to follow.
Due to Covid-19 restrictions, we’re offering virtual classes!
60/40 CHILDBIRTH PREPARATION CLASSES
Use a Sex Positive Lens
Ground your conversations in positivity and possibility. In my parent education sessions, I encourage parents to identify the two positive and integral messages about sexuality that they would like their children to receive at the ages/stages their children are at right now. This practice is helpful for two reasons: first, it frames our conversations in a positive and personal context—it’s not about what could go wrong; it’s about what can go right— and second, it reminds us of where we are at this moment and what we can and are doing to create change while preventing us from becoming overwhelmed and anxious about the many BIG conversations ahead of us. All we need to do is be where our kids are right now, and if we feel overwhelmed; bring it back to these two messages.
We are Lamaze Certified Childbirth Educators and Experienced Doulas.
For Class Registration visit www.vidadoulas.ca
Through these times let’s be careful & kind out there
S TAG E S Summer Programs Running This July & August
Use Your Parenting Village
Check in with your fellow parents. Ask about what their kids are asking, what techniques they’ve found work—maybe it’s a chat while you’re driving in the car, a funny question, or a particular book their kids covet. We often miss out on the wisdom, comfort and humour with our fellow parents when we don’t take the extra few minutes to connect. As with anything valuable in life, it takes practice to become confident, comfortable and competent with sexuality conversations. As someone whose job offers endless opportunities to have sexuality conversations with gender, orientation, ethnic, cultural and age diverse youth, I can assure you growing your own comfort is absolutely possible—it really is a matter of practice! So grab the dog, go out for a walk and repeat after me: vulva, scrotum and penis! Jennifer Gibson, MA, is also known as “The Sex Lady”— officially now for 15 years in Greater Victoria!—to the thousands of amazing youth and adults she is lucky to educate and learn with through her job as the Coordinator of Community Education at Island Sexual Health. She’s passionate about making sexuality education as positive, fun and non-cringe-able as possible. IslandParent.ca
60% labour and birth information to help you prepare for a variety of outcomes. 40% newborn care, new parent adjustment and breastfeeding information.
Programs will be running (hopefully) in person, or online...
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May 2020 33
CUTITOUT!
Lock Down Good Habits
S
choolwork is a kid issue, but how does that look during lockdown? We care about our kids and want to support them, but this is an opportunity to stand back lovingly. While you may not have the square footage to pull back too far, you can practice interior withdrawal. This is the art of minding your own business. In the past, a lack of time with children has been a significant concern and for a good reason. Our kids need our focused time and attention. Children develop self-esteem from the loving gaze of their parents. The message that they matter and that they are accepted and appreciated mirrors their self-worth. Too much closeness happens when we mistakenly believe that we have to take over our child’s responsibility. When we do that, we create resistance in them. They argue with us instead of face the task. So how do we find balance? Announce your desire to support without nagging. Get curious about your children’s goals and what matters to them right now. Ask them, don’t tell them. If you have been taking over your child’s responsibilities, they might think that this is a trick. And actually, if you want your child to give the answer that you want to hear, it is a trick. This is where interior withdrawal comes in. 34 Island Parent @Home
Let go of your agenda. Show a little faith. And if your child doesn’t meet his goals, instead of taking the task over and reprimanding, get curious again. What got in the way? How do you feel about this? What would be doable? What could work? What else? When kids can come up with their own plans, ideas and strategies, they are accountable to themselves. When we set up their agenda for them they are only doing as they are told. If you think that your child will just want to goof off, there could be some truth to that. You might see this at first, especially if they are sure you will swoop in and take over. Keep some structure but give some space and be patient. • Coach your child to come up with a plan by asking questions rather than telling. • Suggest short term so they don’t get overwhelmed. • Use short “what” questions to pull out ideas. • Write down your child’s ideas and post them. This allows your child to face his or her own authority. • If they don’t meet their plans, get curious and—instead of taking over—remain supportive. Dr. Allison Rees has two LIFE Seminars books available: Sidestepping the Power Struggle and The Parent Child Connection. See lifeseminars.com. IslandParent.ca
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s a n c t u a r y
May 2020  35
Life Like No Other
Summer Camps
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