November 2016 Island Parent by Island Parent Group

Island Parent Celebrating

29 Years

The Resource Publication for Vancouver Island Parents

November 2016

Mom Bras The lowdown on the uplift Fall Nature Frolics Exploring Regional Parks

Holiday Gift & Book Recommendations

Now With Victoria Locations!

Rainy Day Games

Toys, games and puzzles for all ages

stroLLers • high chairs • car seats • sLeeP aiDs carriers • sWings • cLothing • shoes • toYs • Books PLaYarDs • skincare • DiaPer Bags • Furniture

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Experience the precision of customized vision

Kool Toys & Teaching Tools

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Every parent wants their child to be happy and healthy, and part of that is ensuring their visual system functions properly.

Did You Know? • Eye exams are recommended at 6 months, and again at 3 years of age. Annual eye exams are recommended from kindergarten thereafter, as vision changes can occur rapidly as your child grows.

Dr. Joslin, Dr. Morin & Associates Doctors of Optometry

Langford: #105–814 Goldstream Ave 250-474-4567 www.langfordoptometrists.com Sooke: #5–6726 West Coast Rd 250-642-4311 www.sookeoptometrists.com

New Patients Welcome

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by e Br icus

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• A Doctor of Optometry can assess your child’s health, vision and coordination with specialized testing at a very early age. • Many optometric services are covered as a beneﬁt by the BC Medical Services Plan (MSP), including one full eye examination annually for children age 18 and under.

November 18 - 26, 2016 www.fsmtheatre.ca

Pregnant?

52 Sara Mimick: Fall Nature Frolics

Pregnancy is a state of health. Midwives recognize what an extraordinary time this is in your life and we are available to support you through your childbearing year. Covered by Your BC Health Care BC’s Medical Services Plan pays for midwifery care, including in-home check-ups in labour and after you’ve had your baby. You can self-refer to a midwife.

Quality Care Studies show that midwifery clients have lower rates of episiotomies, infection, Caesarean sections, forceps and vacuum deliveries and newborns that require resuscitation.

Features 12 Jerri Carson:

Songs for Remembering 14 Holiday Gift & Book Recommendations 16 Erin Skillen: Mom Bras 18 Kate Wiley: Bon Voyage 22 Tim Collins: Saying Sorry 26 Debbie Pungente: Growing Young Farmers In Every Issue Island Parent Notes . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 6 Party Directory . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 24, 25 Family Calendar. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 28 Around the Island. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 32 Family Services Directory. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 46, 47 Preschool & Child Care Directory . . . . . . . . . . . 48, 49 Business & Professional Directory. . . . . . . . . . . . . . 51

Columns 5 Sue Fast: Editor’s Note

10 Rachel Dunstan Muller:

A Lighter Footstep 34 Emillie Parrish: Cooking With Kids 36 Ashley Degraaf: Is There an App for This? 38 Greg Pratt: Dadspeak 40 Hayley Bos & Gudrun Aubertin: Healthy Families, Happy Families 42 Diana Hurschler: New Parent Pages 44 Sara Cassidy: Book Nook 50 Laura Trunkey: Maternity & Beyond 52 Sara Mimick: Nature Notes 54 Allison Rees: Cut It Out!

Choice of Hospital or Home Birth Continuity of Care Comprehensive Care Breastfeeding Education & Support

Sue Fast

midwivesinvictoria.ca 4 Island Parent Magazine

RaeLeigh Buchanan

Mark Warner

Office Manager & Sales sales@islandparent.ca

Advertising Consultant raeleigh@islandparent.ca

Publisher/Owner publisher@islandparent.ca

Design & Layout Eacrett Graphic Design

Distribution Ray Cutts & Ted Dawe

Printed by Black Press

ISSN 0838-5505

Next Issue:

Island Parent Magazine

We would be pleased to schedule an appointment to answer your questions about midwifery care.

Linda Frear

Editor editor@islandparent.ca

830–A Pembroke Street Victoria, BC V8T 1H9 250-388-6905 islandparent.ca

December

Advertising Booking Deadline: November 16

Island Parent Magazine, published by Island Parent Group Enterprises Ltd., is a monthly publication that honours and supports parents by providing information on resources and businesses for Vancouver Island families. Views expressed are not necessarily those of the publisher. No material herein may be reproduced without the permission of the publisher. Annual mail subscriptions (12 issues) are available for $35 (GST included). Canadian Publication Mail Product Sales Agreement 40051398.

On the Cover

Emma F. (2). Photo by Ashley Degraaf, Ashley Degraaf Photography, ashleydegraaf.com

IslandParent.ca

If You’re & You Know It Emojis for parents

f you want to announce your pregnancy via text, using, say, an emoji with a slightly swollen belly or even one that’s full-term, chances are you’ll be hard pressed to find a suitable image. Sure there’s an app to help you get pregnant, to monitor that pregnancy, to record your contractions, and even to come up with the baby’s name, but when it comes to emojis, the parenting-related selection is minimal at best. That is, until now. Thanks to EmojiMom, a new iOS keyboard for pregnant women and moms, you can now access 250 parenting-themed emojis. Have an ultrasound scheduled later in the day so can’t meet a friend for coffee? There’s an emoji for that. Two centimetres dilated? There’s an emoji for that, too. Late getting back to a work meeting because you’re in a bathroom stall pumping breastmilk? Yep. That, too. Created by three moms, Sarah Robinson, Hannah Hudson and Natalie Ralston, Emoji-

Mom was, er, born out of some of their “less glamorous” parenting moments. “One day, I was getting ready for work —one of my first days back after maternity leave—and my baby peed all over my work outfit,” Robinson recalled in an interview with Huffington Post writer Caroline Bologna. “It was such a hilarious, frustrating, it-figures, okay-I-might-break-down-and-cry kind of moment. I texted Hannah and Natalie about it (as I did constantly in the early days of motherhood), and we all said, ‘Seriously, there ought to be an emoji for this feeling!’” So the trio created the emojis they were missing—the good, the bad and the ugly. There’s a mom after giving birth looking relaxed and happy with champagne, but there’s also one with the peri bottle and the mesh underwear. “Because that’s what motherhood is,” they say, “it’s all those things.” And then some, I might add.

Two hundred and fifty emojis is a good start, but imagine the possibilities of 250 more. There could be the head-propped-on-a-coffeecup emoji. And who could do without the haven’t-slept/brushed-my-teeth/combed-myhair-in-a-week emoji, not to mention the one with the pants-on-backwards-where-are-mykeys? look. What about the ahhh-I’m-in-the-

Sue Fast Editor’s Note bathroom-alone emoji, the one whose blissful look disappears, like a Snapchat post, in the same amount of time it takes for a new baby to realize you’ve got a second to yourself. A projectile vomit emoji, perhaps? Or what about the stepped-on-a-piece-of-Lego emoji, one of the many that could be custom designed for those perilous night feedings? Like our range of emotions and various parenting scenarios, the possibilities are endless. The trick will be remembering where we put our phones. And if we forget? There’s an emoji for that.

VIU: Your choice for studies in Special Education

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Ana Vieira, Coordinator Ana.Vieira@viu.ca

For more information contact Donna.Nelson@viu.ca Phone: 250.740.6221

viu.ca/education

November 2016 5

Island Parent

Island Parent notes

er Island Parents

Celebrating

29 Years

on for Vancouv The Resource Publicati

November 2016

Mom Bras The Lowdown on the Uplift

Fall Nature Frolics Exploring Regional Parks

Book Holiday Gift &dations en m m Reco

Please visit any of our valued partners to pick up your latest copy of Island Parent. GREATER VICTORIA Greater Victoria Public Libraries Vancouver Island Regional Libraries Greater Victoria Recreation Centres Thrifty Foods All 25 Serious Coffee locations Island-wide Victoria Gymnastics Country Grocer Chapters Vitamin Shop The Bay Centre (info booth) Scallywags Royal BC Museum Buddies Toys Crumsby’s Market on Yates Market on Millstream Victoria Conservatory JamTots Lifestyle Market Shaw Ocean Discovery Centre

DUNCAN Duncan Mall (centre court) Indigo Red Balloon Cowichan Recreation Centre Cowichan Aquatics Centre Kinderbeez Duncan Tourist Information CHEMAINUS Chemainus Theatre SHAWNIGAN LAKE Community Centre LADYSMITH Ladysmith Recreation Centre NANAIMO Nanaimo Aquatic Centre Quality Foods Country Club Mall Regional Library – Boban Fairway Market Island Natural Health Foods Woodgrove Centre

For a complete list of where you can find a copy of Island Parent Magazine, go to

islandparent.ca 250-388-6905 6

Island Parent Magazine

Victoria Teen Fest

The Victoria TeenFest is on Saturday, November 5 at Pearkes Recreation Centre, 3100 Tillicum Road, from 11am-4:30pm. This one-day free exhibition for youth ages 12-18 years and their families, will give teens and ’tweens in the Victoria area the opportunity to connect with each other, their peers, their communities and community leaders. By creating opportunities for interaction, activities, workshops and performances for this age group, TeenFest will engage and connect our youth, their families and the businesses and organizations that support them. Event highlights include: a teen talent contest; skateboarding; a climbing wall; a performance by teen musicians, singers and bands; interactive sports and gaming activities; 60+ booths to see, learn, shop and sample; four different areas to explore (life and education, cool stuff, fashion and beauty, and health and wellness), dance performers on the main stage; special guests; prizes including a $250 Visa gift card, and more. For information, visit teenfest.ca/victoria.

Children’s storytelling afternoon

Read Local BC 2016 presents Children’s Storytelling Afternoon, a free celebration of B.C.-published books, taking place in Victoria at Russell Books (734 Fort St) on Sunday, November 6 at 1pm. The event will feature award-winning children’s authors who live and work in Victoria, many of whom are award-winning, and beloved across the country. These celebrated authors include Robert “Lucky” Budd, Island Parent columnist Sara Cassidy, Alison Gear, and Alex von Tol. Each will read from their latest picture book, while children are encouraged to ask questions, and bring their own ideas to the

discussion. All ages, families, and individuals are welcome to attend this free event, which provides an affordable, fun, and educational afternoon activity for families. Drop by for a cozy, warm afternoon at Russell Books, where you’ll escape any possibility of rain, and hear from some pretty amazing authors. For more information, visit russellbooks.com.

Relationships & Boundaries at 1UP Single Parent Resource Centre

Would you like to develop a greater sense of self and expand your understanding of workable communication strategies? In the Relationships & Boundaries workshop participants develop a greater sense of self and an expanded understanding of workable communication strategies. Participants will: • Learn about different types of personal boundaries • Replace self-limiting beliefs and thinking patterns with positive and self-enhancing beliefs • Recognize boundary violations against self and others • Learn and practice self-talk and open communication • Start establishing healthy personal boundaries and begin to feel more grounded This six-week course, on Thursday mornings from 9:30-11:30am, runs from November 10-December 15 and is led by Hayley Clausing 1UP Single Parent Resource Centre also offers Lighthouse Parent (0-5yrs), Lighthouse Parent (6-12yrs), Navigating the Digital Teen, Dads With Dads Support Groups, How to Talk so Kids Will Listen and Listen so Kids Will Talk, Anatomy of Anger, and Everyday Mindfulness. All classes are at 602 Gorge Rd East. Fees are on a sliding scale. For more information, visit singleparentvictoria.ca.

Pumpkin Smash 2016

The scariest thing about Halloween is the number of jack-o-lanterns that end up in the landfill. Keep your pumpkins out of the trash and drop by the Greater Victoria Compost Education Centre’s largest event of the year—the 13th Annual Pumpkin Smash (by donation). Bring your family and friends, and of course your pumpkins, and try your hand at an assortment of family games to help raise awareness for composting. Since the event started, the Compost Centre has diverted almost 100 tonnes of pumpkins from the landfill. The Greater Victoria Compost Education Centre is located at 1216 North Park Street in Victoria and provides composting and organic gardening education to Capital Region residents. The Centre is also your regional “one-stop compost shop,” selling composting supplies and offering free Composting Basics workshops. For dates and times of the pumpkin smash, phone the compost hotline at 250-386-WORM (9676) or visit compost.bc.ca.

IslandParent.ca

Legion Youth Remembrance Contest

Attention kids and youth in B.C. and Yukon. Are you an artist, wordsmith, or a filmmaker? If so, take those words and pictures in your head and show them to the world. Create a work of art or literature about remembrance and what it means to you and your country and you could win local and national prizes. You can create something that is broadly about remembrance or you can focus on something more specific such as a family member who fought in the war, the poppy, a war memorial in your community, or the sacrifice of veterans. Categories include: poster (Grades 1-12); essay (Grades 4-12); poetry (Grades 4-12); and video (Grades 7-12). Prizes include an iPad and a trip to Ottawa. Deadline November 15. For more information, visit legion bcyukon.ca/content/youth-contests.

Coats for Kids

West 49’s Coats for Kids campaign, fueled by community support, is once again collecting coats for kids who don’t have adequate winter clothing. Since 2002 more than 88,000 kids have received winter coats as a result of this program.

West 49 Coats for Kids campaign runs through to November 20. Coat collection barrels are located in every store. Anyone who brings in a clean, insulated gently used winter coat to any West 49 store will receive $25 off any winter jacket. Donated jackets will then be given to various youth shelters and charities across the country. Each store partners with a local charity in their area—so people in the community benefit. In past campaigns, coats have been provided to organizations such as Big Brothers and Big Sisters, Canadian Diabetes Association, Salvation Army, The United Way and local youth shelters and missions across the country. For more information, visit coatsforkids. west49.com.

Christmas in November (& December)

Feel like getting into the Christmas spirit a little early? If so, there’s no shortage of events this month: 25th Annual Festival of Trees at the Bay Centre and the Fairmont Empress from November 16-January 5. All proceeds support BC Children’s Hospital Foundation. Donate to vote for your favourite Christmas tree. (suggested $2 minimum). The Ladysmith Festival of Lights on

November 24, starting at 3pm, features entertainment, a parade at 6:45, fireworks, and a visit from Santa. Christmas Tree Light Up & Santa Parade. Kick-off the holiday season in Centennial Square with the 8th annual downtown Christmas Tree Light-Up on November 26 from 4-5:30pm. Enjoy musical performances, roving entertainment, ice sculptures, and free treats before the Island Farms Santa Light Parade at 5:45. Rain or shine. Free. Sidney Sparkles Parade & Sailpast on December 4 at 5pm. Watch the parade along Beacon Avenue and Second Street, then wander down to the waterfront to see the sailpast.

GVPL’s Cultural & Recreational Passes

The library works with several local partners to offer library cardholders the opportunity to explore local cultural institutions and recreation centres. If you have a valid adult library card, you can borrow a free art gallery or museum pass from your local library. Place a hold on a pass with your library card at gvpl.ca and pick it up at your local library branch. Art Gallery of Greater Victoria Household Access Pass provides free general admission

be amazed

For babies and parents, and those who love them 975 Fort street, Victoria BC - 250-595-4905 - www.motheringtouch.ca IslandParent.ca

November 2016 7

Ride the Wild Cave Slide!

- fossil hike - self-guided caving - cave tours – mild to wild Ranked #1 Attraction Open Year Round

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Imagination. Creativity. Joy

to the Art Gallery of Greater Victoria for two adults and up to four children. The loan period is seven days, with no renewals, and does not include special events or gift shop discounts. The Royal BC Museum Family Pass provides free general admission to the Royal BC Museum for 2 adults and up to 3 children (youth under 5 are free). The loan period is 7 days, with no renewals, and does not include special events or gift shop discounts. The Saanich Recreation Pass provides free general admission to any Saanich Recreation Centre for two adults and up to four children (5-18 years; children 4 and under are free). The loan period is 7 days, with no renewals permitted, and does not include child minding or registered classes. For more information, please visit gvpl.ca. The Robert Bateman Centre Pass provides free general admission to galleries and exhibitions for two adults and up to four children (6-18 years; under 5 are free). The loan period is 7 days, with no renewals. For information, visit gvpl.ca/using-the-library/ourcollection/cultural-and-recreational-passes.

Learning Portal at Royal BC Museum

For a generation that’s growing up swiping screens, texting and puzzling over parental commands to “dial” phone numbers, the Royal BC Museum’s Learning Portal (learning.royalbcmuseum.bc.ca) is a custom-made digital tool, designed for tech-savvy learners who like choice, connecting online and assembling info as they see fit. The Learning Portal offers tools for teachers and students, including “playlists”—a feature similar to a mixtape (which parents can surely relate to). Anyone can create a playlist by choosing materials offered on

the Learning Portal, mixing and organizing to fit whatever theme or topic they’re most interested in—and then sharing. Some of the most interesting and useful playlists have been created by teachers and education students; these are all public and ready to share as resources. Check out the playlists at learning.royalbcmuseum.bc.ca/ our-playlists/. Since launching in February 2015, the Learning Portal has also added lots of new material, including episodes from the televised series “This Week in History,” featuring the Royal BC Museum’s collections, and “Pathways,” which are entry points into Learning Portal subjects as varied as Emily Carr, BC’s species at risk and BC’s gold rush. Soon to come are pathways about spiders, mammoths and mastodons, the Royal BC Museum’s insect and fish collections, and much more. The Learning Portal is a window into the Royal BC Museum’s collections and BC’s history that kids and adult learners can crack open no matter where they live in the province. The Royal BC Museum will tweet the launch of new playlists, pathways or other new features on Twitter, using the hashtag #RBCMlearningportal.

Victoria READ Society & Literacy Victoria Are One

The Victoria READ Society and Literacy Victoria are forming one organization. Both organizations have been long-standing actors in the Greater Victoria literacy arena— READ formed in 1977 and Literacy Victoria formed in 1986. By working together, the two organizations will have a greater impact on literacy in Victoria. The new organization will continue providing the following programs for children, youth and adults:

Climate Action To-Go Kits

Ongoing registration for the 2016/17 season Ages 3 - Teen 716 Johnson St 250-590-6752

VictoriaAcademyofBallet.ca Bleiddyn del Villar Bellis, Artistic Director Fellow & Examiner CSC-CICB Enrico Cecchetti Final Diploma

8 Island Parent Magazine

The Capital Regional District (CRD) has partnered with BC Hydro and the Greater Victoria Public Library on a new program that takes climate action to-go. The Climate Action To-Go Kit program is an interactive way to educate people on climate change and community sustainability issues. Each kit provides practical tools to measure household energy use and offers a selection of diverse resources for residents across the region. Each Climate Action To-Go Kit allows users to: • Measure household appliance electricity use with the Kill-A-Watt Meter • Discover air leaks in walls and around windows using the Thermal Leak Detector • Test out an ultra-efficient LED light bulb • Learn about local solutions to climate change through films and books for adults and families. Kits are available in all 10 branches of the Greater Victoria Public Library. The Sooke, Sidney/North Saanich branches of the Vancouver Island Regional Library as well as the Salt Spring Island Public Library. To find out more about this program, visit gvpl.ca.

IslandParent.ca

• One-to-one tutoring program for adults in the community and inmates at the Vancouver Island Correctional Centre on Wilkinson Road • An afterschool literacy and numeracy reinforcement program in elementary schools called the Noisy Kids Reading Club • Small group remedial instruction for children and youth • Academic level assessment The two organizations are joining to offer a better continuum of services, joint strategic planning, sharing of resources and other useful synergies. READ and Literacy Victoria gratefully acknowledge the role of the Victoria Literacy Alliance, a collaborative venture spearheaded by The Victoria Foundation and championed by the Greater Victoria Public Library CEO Maureen Sawa, in promoting the spirit of collaboration that encouraged the conversations that led to this merger.

Moscow Ballet in partnership with Swan Lake Christmas Hill Nature Sanctuary present

Bridging the Gap

Every child deserves to have an education. But accessing a university or college education isn’t always easy for all families. A recent survey conducted by the Canadian Scholarship Trust Foundation (CST) shows one in three parents is not setting aside any money for their child’s post-secondary education. Many instead are encouraging their child to stay in province for their education because of costs. Others expect to go into to debt to help their child, while some are planning on dipping into their retirement fund or even delaying retirement because they don’t want their child to go into debt. But despite the fact that so many Island parents aren’t saving, 83 per cent expect their child to attend some type of academic institution after high school and three in four feel they should be paying for some of their child’s degree. There is a gap between parents’ expectations and the financial realities facing students today. With rising tuition fees and up to $8,400 in free money available from the government for starting an RESP, parents can take an active role in planning for their child’s future. That’s why CST, together with the Minister of Education, launched the #BCbridgethegap campaign to raise awareness about the BC Training and Education Savings Grant started by the BC government, as well as other federal grants. Take the pledge and learn more at cst.org/bcbridgethegap. •

Royal Theatre Saturday, November 12th, 2016 ~ 2pm performance Tickets on sale now through the box office of the Royal Theatre

Please use the direct link which will pre-apply a code (rmts.bc.ca/promo/swan) or type ‘SWAN’ in the promo code field manually ensuring a portion of the tickets will support the Bridges to Nature campaign. This code must be mentioned when purchasing over the phone 250.386.6121 or in person as it is only by using the code SWAN that the Sanctuary can be assured they will receive a portion of the proceeds of the ticket sales.

Swan Lake christmas hill n a t u r e

s a n c t u a r y

New Montessori Academy Now Open in Duncan Preschool (2 to 4.9 years old) Kindergarten (4.9 to 6 years old) Elementary (6 to 12 years old) French & English

IMAC Montessori Academy 2375 Koksilah Road, Duncan 250-737-1119 intmontessori.ca

Nurturing young minds. Keeping the spirit free. IslandParent.ca

November 2016 9

AllianceFrançaise de Victoria The Alliance Française is a worldwide organization based in Paris, offering language instruction by certified teachers, adapted to the needs of learners. Classes at various skill levels are offered though community centres. Private instruction is tailored to individuals, business and government agencies. For more information, please see our website:

afvictoria.ca

Considering your first home purchase? Four secrets you need to know! What to do and what not to do.

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250-891-6776 ConnieLebeau.ca ConnieLebeau@RoyalLePage.ca 10 Island Parent Magazine

Encountering Nature

t was a perfect fall afternoon, crisp and bright. Heading straight home to chores and homework seemed wasteful in the circumstances, so my kids and I set out on an adventure instead. As I watched my 10-year-old daughter and 8-year-old son race down the tree-lined path towards a new-to-us estuary, I couldn’t help but silently congratulate myself. With their agreement, I’d deliberately scaled back their extracurricular activities to accommodate more free time outside. According to environmental educator Joy Palmer, “childhood experience in the outdoors is the single most important factor in developing personal concern for the environment.” In other words, if we want to raise future stewards of the Earth, we need to give them frequent opportunities to engage in the natural world. But this mission is time-sensitive: if we don’t provide these opportunities when our children are young, we risk nature becoming simply a backdrop to their urban activities—at best a source of needed resources, at worst something slightly menacing that should be controlled. To be honest, my motivation for taking my kids outside is often selfish. Nature feeds me. It clears my mind and reconnects me to a sense of gratitude and wonder. It reminds me that the world is bigger than my own day-to-day concerns. Happily for those of us who find nourishment outdoors, nature is as healthy for our children as it is for us. Children who spend time playing outside get more exercise. They tend to be less competitive and more creative according to Swedish researchers, and they have an enhanced ability to concentrate in school. Scientists from a number of countries and disciplines have demonstrated that simply spending time in a natural environment can improve our physical and mental wellbeing, no matter what our age. New Society Publishers recently gifted me with a review copy of The Big Book of Nature Activities, by Drew Monkman and Jacob Rodenburg. I borrow most of my books from the library, but this is one

reference I’m glad I can keep. Billing itself as a comprehensive guide to anyone who wishes to help children or adolescents “explore, appreciate, and connect with the natural world,” the book offers a wealth of age-appropriate activities, games, stories,

Rachel Dunstan Muller A Lighter Footstep facts, illustrations and photographs. It also provides a list of worthwhile nature apps and websites, with suggestions for a balanced use of digital technology. The book is well-organized, beginning with a lengthy introduction, followed by helpful chapters on “Basic Skills for Connecting to Nature” and “Key Nature Concepts.” The remainder of the book is divided into four seasons, with further divisions for the six ecological zones of North America. Vancouver Island falls in the Marine West Coast Region, which is characterized by large areas of temperate forest and the wettest climate on the continent. While The Big Book of Nature Activities is an excellent reference for families just beginning to explore the great outdoors, it has plenty to offer more seasoned naturalists as well. I consider myself a veteran outdoor adventurer, and yet I encountered all kinds of useful suggestions and even a few new concepts as I leafed through the opening chapters. For example, do you practice “splatter vision” on the trail? Splatter vision is a term naturalists use to describe “all-around watching.” It means not looking at one point or perspective for too long, but instead scanning in all directions and all distances, from our feet to the crowns of trees and up to the sky, from what’s directly ahead to the far horizon and everything in between. It also means developing our peripheral sight, so we can IslandParent.ca

catch movement at the very edge of our field of vision. Splatter vision is how most animals view the world. “Pishing”—imitating the scolding cry of a chickadee or titmouse to coax forest birds into view—was also new to me. To pish, you first get into position two to three metres from trees or shrubs where the birds you’d like to attract can land. Then you pucker your lips and make a shrill “pshhhhh” sound, with an optional “EEE” at the end. Make the sound in sequences of two or three with pauses in between. Continue for a few minutes to allow birds time to get close. You may want to listen to chickadees or titmice on Youtube to perfect your pishing call. While the seasonal activities in this book will keep my family busy for a long time, I also gleaned some general suggestions that should make any outdoor excursion more successful: Be prepared. In my eagerness to get out the door, I have been known to forget a few essentials. Having a small pack with emergency raingear, adequate water, snacks and a basic first aid kit can spell the difference between an adventure and an ordeal. For maximum enjoyment, make sure your kids are wearing comfortable and sturdy footwear and clothes that you don’t mind sacrificing to rough surfaces and dirt. If you’re venturing somewhere more remote, let someone know where you’re going and when you expect to be back. Slow down. Allow your children time to explore at their own rate. Build in regular rest stops along the trail, and give your kids time to play once you reach your destination. Let them turn over stones and peer under logs, climb trees and wade through streams. To avoid boredom, turn on your own senses as you watch them discover the world. What can you see, smell, hear, feel? Keep it fun. While The Big Book of Nature Activities offers some great educational ideas, your family’s time outdoors shouldn’t feel like a series of imposed lessons. As the authors say, “loving nature should never be forced.” Use the ideas that interest your children: you want to stimulate their curiosity, not overwhelm them. Customize excursions to your children’s ages. Younger children need lots of time and space to engage in free play, while older kids may enjoy more strenuous physical and mental challenges. And, of course, have fun yourself! Rachel Dunstan Muller is the mother of five, and a children’s author. Her previous articles can be found at islandparent.ca. IslandParent.ca

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November 2016 11

Is Your Child’s Face Developing Well? Does your child breathe through his/her mouth? Does your child suffer from allergies? Does your child have any oral habit such as thumb or finger sucking? Does your child have an untreated tongue tie? Does your child have crowded teeth? Does your child have jaws that seem too far forward or back?

Early Intervention can have far reaching benefits.

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12 Island Parent Magazine

program • lovely rural location connecting children to nature

Songs for Remembering

emembrance Day commemorates Canadians who died in the First and Second World Wars and the Korean War. It isn’t the easiest of commemorations to explain to young children. One way to explain this important day to children and to help them understand the history is by reading books, poems and singing songs written for this special day. The following books and songs explain why Remembrance Day is observed and why we honour veterans by flying flags, wearing poppies, and having a minute of silence.

Jerri Carson “Little Poppy Song” is a good song for very young children to sing. The words are easy to understand and the melody is sung to the popular children’s tune Frère Jacques. Little Poppy, Little Poppy Given to me, given to me Help me keep Canada, Help me keep Canada Safe and free, safe and free I’ll wear a poppy; I’ll wear a poppy As red as red can be, as red as red can be To show that I remember, to show that I remember Those who fought for me, those who fought for me In Flanders Field, by Linda Granfield, is the story of the famous war memorial poem “In Flanders Fields” by the Canadian doctor and poet, Lieutenant Colonel John McCrae. It relates details of WWI, such as life in the trenches and experiences in the field hospital, and helps explain the sacrifices the brave soldiers made during the First World War. A Poppy Is to Remember, by Heather Patterson, is a stirring picture book that explains the symbolism behind the poppy. With simple text and dramatic illustrations, it explains the history of the poppy and Remembrance Day in Canada. We Remember, by Craig Cassils, is a great collection of songs and poems for Remembrance Day. The book includes sheet music as well as a CD with beautiful orchestrations for a family sing-a-long. On November 11, at 11 a.m. take a moment of silence with your family to reflect on the men and women who serve Canada in conflict and peace.

Jerri Carson is a retired music teacher. She now spends her time playing the piano and cello. IslandParent.ca

Holiday

Gift & Book

Recommendations The following gift ideas come from some of our local merchants and businesses. To find out more about any of the businesses listed below, please refer to the ads in this issue. From Abra-Kid-Abra

Abra-Kid-Abra, everything for kids (2005 Oak Bay Ave) has Christmas covered this year with a large selection of fun PJ’s, onsies, nighties and robes available to keep your kids cosy this Christmas, sizes 2-12 years, $29.99-$55.00. Keep the kids busy with these fun puzzles from Crocodile Creek, suitable for ages 4 and up, starting at $12.99 and continue the fun in the kitchen this holiday with Mellisa and Doug’s great food and kitchen play products, starting at $12.99.

From Baggins Shoes

Baby/Preschool: Iconic shoes for your growing youngsters. Get a pair of checkerboard Vans or soft sole Converse—so adorable you’ll melt. $30. Children: Classic Chucks. You and your little one can match in a wide variety of classic Chucks—available in highs and lows. $35. Juvenile/Teen: Fun prints. Whether your teen loves cats in inner tubes, or pop art from Andy Warhol, there is a shoe for them. $65. Adult: Custom printed shoes. Design your own one-of-a-kind shoe. You can think it, we can print it! $120.

From Momease

a great gift for any new or expectant parent. $69.99.

From The Mothering Touch Centre

Baby: Indestructibles. It’s the little series that could. Indestructibles are innovative books built for the way babies read. They are rip, chew, drool and gum proof and washable. Ages 6 months up. Baby/Preschool: The Perch. Whether at home or away, the Perch table-chair will give your child a special place at the family table. Made in Vancouver by Guzzie and Gus. Ages 6 months up. Baby/Preschool: Happy Mat. The ezpz Happy Mat is a placemat + plate in one that suctions to the table, which means that it captures kids’ messes. No more flying plates! Children: Cate and Levi. A Canadian company making stuffed animals and puppets from reclaimed or recycled goods. Each item is unique and delightfully playful. Great for kids of all ages.

Baby: Minimoc Baby Moccasins. Handmade in BC from durable, quality leather. Designed with elastic at the opening for an easy slip-on fit. Soft-soled suede bottoms for a non-slip surface to help baby undertake those first few steps safely and comfortably. $47.99. Baby: Skip Hop Camping Cubs Activity Gym. With more than 17 developmental activities, the Camping Cubs Activity Gym helps to stimulate & develop baby’s sensory skills. $109.99. Baby/Toddler: Hazel Village Organic Woodland Doll. Each animal is handmade with care from organic cotton. With many adorable characters, plus beautiful dress-up outfits to share, they’re fun for big kids, From National Geographic too. $64.99. Store—IMAX Theatre Adult: Herschel Supply Strand Duffle Baby/Preschool: Meiya & Alvin ColDiaper Bag. Inspired by classic carryalls, lection: Natural Baby Toys. Easy-to-grip, the fashionable and unisex Strand Duffle machine washable toys, safe for newborns Diaper Bag from Herschel Supply makes and toddlers. Made from natural materials,

November 2016 13

Meiya the Mouse and Alvin the Elephant provide emotional reassurance and are ideal for teething. $24.99 Children: Wikki Stix. These twisty playthings adhere to almost any surface and can be easily lifted off and reshaped again and again. Ideal for forming letters, numbers, shapes. $6.99. Juvenile/Teen: Snap Circuits Electronics Discovery Kits. Snap Circuits make learning electronics easy and fun. Build flying saucers, alarms, radios, and more. All parts mounted on plastic module and snap together with ease. No tools required. $49.99. Adult: Ionizing Himalayan Salt Lamps. Himalayan Salt Lamps emanate a soothing glow, providing beautiful ambient light in any room. USB adaptor allows users to reap ionizing benefits while working at the computer. $25-$35.

non-toxic, soft airdrying clay to capture the precious imprint. Includes plastic shaping ring, air-drying clay, rolling pin, plastic hole punch, and red and green satin ribbons for that finishing touch. $12.95.

From the Royal BC Museum Shop

Children: Aliens Among Us: Invasive Animals and Plants in British Columbia by Alex Van Tol, Illustrated by Mike Deas. Would you know Dalmatian Toadflax if you saw it? This informative book arms young people with the tools to stop invasive species in British Columbia. $19.95. PB. 128 pgs. Adults: The Sustainability Dilemma: Essays on British Columbia Forest and From Oyaco Baby/Preschool: Gro-clock uses images Environmental History by Robert Griffin of the stars and sun to communicate when and Richard A. Rajala. Delve into two of the to go back to sleep and when it’s time to more controversial issues British Columbiget up. Set the clock to display a cheerful ans have faced over the past 60 years—the smiley sun at progressively later times of management of our forest industry and its morning, training the child to get up only impact on our freshwater ecosystems. 448 once they “see the sun.” Comes with an pages. $34.95. illustrated book. $64.95. Bumbo Multi Seat. Can be used as a floor, feeding or booster as soon as your child can sit unassisted up to three years old. Retractable chair straps allow baby to join the family at the table, while the height-adjustable base and removable foam cushioning allows the Multi Seat to grow with your child. $79.95. Trunki Ride-on Suitcase. Family vacations and sleepovers just got even more fun with Trunki. The award-winning British design takes the stress out of traveling. Children can pack Trunki with all their From School House Teaching favourite belongings and ride or tow their Supplies travel companion along. $69.95. Baby/Preschool: Granny’s House. This Pearhead Babyprints Holiday Ornament. co-operative adventure game requires Just press baby’s tiny hand or foot into the everyone’s help to pass obstacles in order to reach Granny’s country home. With

lots of discussion, decision making and brainstorming, everyone can be a winner! Children: Chemistry Plus Science Kit. Learn how to do over 30 different activities from splitting water into rocket fuel to popping hydrogen, hunting for protons, growing huge crystals and much more. Juvenile/Teen: DaVinci Medieval Trebuchet. Trebuchets were the most powerful weapon of the Medieval Times. This working model will throw a soft clay ball (included) well over 6 metres! A great kit for beginner to intermediate model makers. Adult: Hoberman Mini Sphere. Fun for the whole family – composed of six circles, it is fascinating to watch contract and expand to three times its size, to play games, to improve breathing, and as a stress-releaser.

From Victoria Bug Zoo

Baby/Preschool: Finger and hand puppets. From one-finger ladybug puppets to whole-hand hermit crabs, our arthropod puppets will make you wish you had more fingers. $4-$35. Children: Bug Collecting Kits. Inspire a future field biologist. Various collection kits include nets and other collecting devices, binoculars, magnifying glasses and viewing containers. $5-$10. Juvenile/Teen: Starter microscope sets. For the budding young scientist, a first glimpse through a microscope can reveal a world of wonder. $15.99. Adult: Attracting Beneficial Bugs to your Garden by Jessica Walliser. This refreshing

Juvenile/Teen: Wet & Wild Cave advenbook delves into the fascinating relationships between insects and plants and will ture. Great for explorers aged 8 and up, help you make your own insect-friendly this thrilling trip highlights the incredible natural forces that created these marble garden. $31.95. 240pgs. passages and crystal caverns. See an underground river, climb a waterfall, slide down the ramps and ladders and try an optional squeeze through the “worm-hole”, a small taste of “wild” caving! Don’t forget your From the Children’s Treehouse Baby/Preschool: My First Railway Starter camera (waterproof!)! $69 All ages: Gift certificates are available in Pack by Brio. With this playful train, tunnel and clever connection magnets that always any amount you choose and never expire – connect in every direction, there are more so your loved ones can redeem at any time. things to explore than just the tracks ahead. Perfect for the inquisitive toddler. $44.99. From Huckleberry Baby Shop Children: The Darkest Dark by Chris Baby/Preschool: Padraig Slippers. AllHadfield. How can Chris ever be an as- time favourite. Stay on the feet. Pure wool tronaut if he’s scared of the dark? Based with soft sheepskin lining and leather sole. on the childhood of Canadian astronaut, Hand-dyed and crocheted. Made in BC. Chris Hadfield. Ages 4-10. 48 pgs. $22.99. $32-$49. Children: Yoga Planet Activity Cards (Box of 50) by Tara Gruber & Leah Kalish; Illustrated by Sophie Fatus. Yoga poses, breathing exercises, solo or group activities to promote awareness, mindfulness and sensitivity to other people and the planet. $22.99. Juvenile/Teen: Recap Mason Jar Lids. For active teens and kids. Flip-top, leak-proof ease for smoothies and sports drinks. Made in the USA. BPA free. $12.49. Adult: Kogi Naturals Boxed Gift Sets. Natural and organic bath and body products made in Chemainus BC. $14.99$24.99.

Up Island

From Kool & Child (Nanaimo)

Baby/Preschool: Look Who’s Smiling by Manhattan Toys. This terry cloth photo album is the ultimate keepsake toy. Personalize the book with up to five photos. A favourite of babies and toddlers. $22.99. 6pgs. Children: Klutz Activity Books. A great collection of book-based activity kits. From the budding artist to the young scientist, there’s a book for everyone. $11.99-$29.99. Juvenile/Teen: Dixit. A lovingly illustrated game of creative guesswork. Players use the beautiful imagery on their cards to bluff their opponents From Horne Lake Caves Children: Rediscover Main Cave as a new and guess which imsubterranean playground with conservation age matches the story. ramps, ladders and a slide! Enjoy a short $54.99. Adult: Canadian forest walk, climb an underground waterfall and share a fun 60 minute caving experience Artist Series Puzzles. A beautiful new col(May to Oct). $24 Children: The Princess in Black Takes a Vacation by Shannon and Dean Hale. Candlewick. After a long night fighting monsters, Princess Magnolia needs a break at the beach. Just as she is taking a nap on the sunny sand, she hears a roar. Could there be monsters at the beach? 96 pgs. $18.99. Children: KidzLabs Glow Dino & Fossils. Be a curious paleontologist. Excavate and assemble a glow-in-the-dark T-Rex skeleton, set up a model of a T-Rex skull, mold and rebuild fossil replicas of prehistoric animals. Everything you build glows in the dark. $29.99.

IslandParent.ca

lection of 1,000 piece puzzles from Cobble Hill Puzzles featuring artists from the Group of Seven and E.J. Hughes. $19.99.

From Pumpkin Pie Kids

Baby/Preschool: Green Toys Ferry Boat. Eco-Friendly two-story ferry boat with two mini cars. Made in USA with 100 per cent recycled plastic. Makes a Great bath toy! $36.99. Dragon cape with claws by Great Pretenders. This Dragon seems magical indeed—with a textured velour (lined) cape, and stuffed claws and scales, the cape is fully lined for adventure. Ages 3+ $34.99. Plan Toys 11 piece Stacking Rocket wood toy for toddlers. This stacking and sorting rocket teaches about geographic shapes, colours and sequencing. Made of Eco-friendly Planwood rubberwood in their factory in Thailand. Ages 18 months. $29.99. Children: eeBoo Musician and Artist Paper Doll Set. Have fun with Naomi and Elodie in their studio where they sketch and play. 2 sided scene, 2 dolls and 2 sheets of reusable clothes and accessories. $ 21.99.•

’s

A Midsummer Night’s Dream

by Monster Theatre Saturday, January 28 at 1pm VIU’s Malaspina Theatre

Mom Bras The low down on the uplift B

eing knocked up isn’t kind to your boobs. Neither is breastfeeding. Once upon a time, they were more of an accessory than a function, with the benefit of being a stop on the way to sexual pleasure. Then suddenly you’re pregnant and they’re sore, they’re huge and seem almost foreign. Then the baby arrived and—if you’re nursing— they’re at the beck and call of your new little human, who has little to no respect and treats them like a milk-dispensing chew toy.

of motherhood, hustling from one task to the next. Focusing on ourselves becomes almost exclusively last. There is a great scene in the movie Bad Moms where Mila Kunis’ character is shamed by her fellow mom friends for wearing a beige, uniboobproducing monstrosity. Something similar happened with a friend of mine—drop dead gorgeous and always in impeccably-styled clothes. But she was hiding a dark secret and one day bravely revealed the strap

Breasts are somewhat of an enigma even before they’re put through the baby ringer, but especially so when you’re done breastfeeding and done having babies. You wait for what’s next, a nervous bystander with no control over where they’ll settle—in size and in location. Once the verdict is in, chances are they’re bigger or smaller, and a little saggier, than they were before you became a baby B&B. Yes, they may have migrated and evolved—potentially for the worse—but now they’re back to being yours! Do you want to show them off, share them or keep them to yourself? It’s officially back to being your choice, and no longer your maternal obligation. And that is something to celebrate. All too often marking the occasion gets forgotten or goes unnoticed within the haze

of the bra she was wearing beneath one of her wickedly cool outfits. Beige—ugh, beige—and graying with literally one thread holding the strap up. Actually threadbare. She was immediately assured she owed herself much better and threw the sad, decomposing bra out that very night. And then she moved forward. How can you mark and celebrate your own journey back to breast autonomy? What follows is a suggestion based on my own journey. Take it, toss it, make it your own. Step 1. Lose the nursing bras. No matter how comfortable they are, how much they cost, or how much use they still have left in them. If they’re still in good shape that’s great—for another mama in need. Donate them. Your boobs don’t need them anymore

TICKETS: $12 each or 2 for $20

theatreone.org | 250-754-7587 Mid Island

Growing healthy families, together.

Dr. Meghan van Drimmelen ND and Dr. Carla Cashin ND

Naturopathic Medical Clinic 314–1175 Cook Street, Victoria 778-265-8340 www.juniperfamilyhealth.com 16 Island Parent Magazine

IslandParent.ca

and your self-esteem deserves a lot more than a clunky old bra that reminds you of being a feeding station rather than a gorgeous, sexually-attractive woman. Step 2. Get your boobs to a fitting. Yes, the idea of showing a random stranger the state of your chest may be horrifying, but wearing an ill-fitting bra every day is far

Erin Skillen

Erin Skillen is the founder of content4good in Victoria. IslandParent.ca

The Royal City Youth Ballet’s

The Nutcracker Island Exclusive

Friday Dec. 16, 2016 7pm

Photo: Amy Williams

worse in the long run. If you’re feeling confident, hit a trendier store staffed by younger women who will have sexier bras on offer. If you’re feeling gross and not loving your body, hit a department store typically staffed by older women who have seen, and own, every unexpected configuration of aging breasts you could ever imagine. Step 3. Once you know your size, get shopping. How vastly your breasts have changed since your pre-baby life will determine just how far you need to go in your bra expedition. If you’re the same as before, get a couple bras that mark the occasion and make you feel great. If you’re at a new size, it’s time to go a little bit nuts. Try to get some that are functional (like a sports bra), some that are super sexy and some that fall somewhere in the middle. How crazy you can go is partially determined by how much you can afford to spend, but please do remember that these are things you wear all the time and can have an immediate impact on how you feel about yourself. Consider it an exercise in positive mental health and an act of self-compassion, which pretty much every mom needs. Step 4. Wear them. And own it. Who cares if you have a wibbly belly or flattened mom butt. Proudly lift those boobs up and know, that even if no one else is seeing it, you look and feel stunning beneath your clothes. Your body did a really incredible thing and now you are out the other side and the stronger—and more beautiful—for it. We’re all busy. But try to celebrate the milestones. Make yourself feel good. And love the body your life has led you to. You’ve earned it.

Tickets Family

$26 $84

(2 adults and 2 children)

Saturday Dec. 17, 2016 1pm cowichanpac.ca Ticket Centre: 250.748.7529 2687 James St. Duncan, BC

November 2016 17

Bon

Voyage T

omorrow I will turn 40. On the day after tomorrow, my kids and I will board a transAtlantic flight, leaving behind our cherished home in the Alps. Trading in a chalet at the foot of a massif forâ&#x20AC;ŚLangford. Cue the party horns.

While we are returning to the same home in which our children were born and raised, it’ll require a bit of adjusting. Outside my chalet window, the hills here are dotted with gingerbread-like houses, protected from the elements by coat after coat of wood stain. No trace of HardiePlank here. Residents of Thollon-les-Memises covet their neighbours’ old stone farmhouses, not their perfectly manicured lawns. In fact, most people keep their yards in check by inviting the mayor’s cows to graze there. Every Sunday, traffic backs up around the entrance to the cemetery, not Costco.

Join us for a wondrous adventure this holiday season, only at The Port Theatre !

2016-2017 SEASON

Canada’s Royal Winnipeg Ballet

Nutcracker

TUESDAY & WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 5 & 6, 7:30pm

Kate Wiley There are just a handful of surnames in that cemetery of 100 graves or so. Most are familiar to me because the great grandchildren of those buried there were my children’s classmates. “He could never leave Thollon,” an elderly friend whispers to me behind her adult son’s back. As a family multiplies, the older generation is tasked with making room for the new. We’ve got a friend here who is already building future homes for his four- and six-year-old. On the weekends, one can find Julian on the newly acquired property, stripping away the sagging roof of the existing farmhouse. It was built in the mid-nineteenth century and its three floors are riddled with sinkholes. But the supporting beams share the girth of the cows grazing below and will shelter another three generations, God willing. There’s no talk of house flipping here. Since school let out last month, our kids have spent their days playing in the neighbours’ yards. There are no fences separating the properties, so they come and go as they please. During winter months, my husband would pull the boys across the same open properties on a toboggan, arriving at the school just as the church bell tolled 8:30am. Once we’re home, our eldest will take the bus to Esquimalt every day. The little one, who has been attending class daily in France (where public education is offered from age three), will revert to just two afternoons a week of preschool. No more Saturday morning cartoons doubling as foreign language lessons. No more sitting down to lunch as a family— IslandParent.ca

Pre-Show Chats 6:45pm in the Harmac Room

Alanna McAdie & Yosuke Mino | Photo Samanta Katz

TICKETS $25-68 | 250.754.8550 | porttheatre.com/spotlight

Junior School OPEN HOUSE

To learn more about the advantages of a Glenlyon Norfolk School education at our Junior Campus (Junior Kindergarten to Grade 5), please drop by our OPEN HOUSE. RSVP not required. When: Friday, November 18 9 to 11:30 a.m. or 1 to 2 p.m. Where: 1701 Beach Drive, Victoria, BC Email admissions@mygns.ca or call 250.370.6801 for more information. Glenlyon Norfolk School

November 2016 19

Serving the Families of Vancouver Island for Over 23 Years The Kiddies Store

every day! No more regular deliveries of wildflowers from the petite fille next door who assures me she would visit me in Canada if we didn’t all speak gibberish here. No more paper-wrapped parcels of milky goodness in my mini fridge; a gorgeous block of Comté here is equivalent in price to a mouse-worthy morsel of processed cheddar back home.

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Island Parent Magazine

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Upon our return, I will rearrange our belongings in a house that was rented—but not particularly well cared for—in our absence. I will dust and scrub and polish, but mostly my mind will be clouded with images of Thollon and the memories we made there. I will return to one of several jobs I keep, wondering why I don’t have more to show for my career at midlife. And, undoubtedly, I will be questioning my decision to work at all, when I could be snatching precious hugs and kisses from my boys, before they decide open displays of affection are not dignified. I will reflect on something discussed on a podcast I listen to religiously called Question of the Day. The topic was “How do you find what you’re uniquely best at?” The guest countered with this question: “Where am I least replaceable?” For me, the answer is irrefutable: As mother to my children. After a year of managing the mood swings that come with navigating kindergarten in a foreign language, I deserve a raise. If only I could combine my position as CEO of our household with one that flexes my creative muscle and makes us some money. (A fantasy shared by every other mom on the planet.) Isn’t the consolation prize for reaching midlife a better grasp of the big picture? IslandParent.ca

Surely I just need to examine this notion of career from another angle. Rather than trying to be incrementally better than someone else at writing or editing, my friends in podcast land urge me to break away from the pack and explore option C. “Express your unique weirdness!” they beseech me. I’ve never considered myself particularly weird, but I suppose packing your kids off to France for the year is unusual. Here in France, I am weird because I don’t spank my kids or feed them copious amounts of chocolate every afternoon for goûter. Glob-

Having spent a year nestled up against the Alps, I can say one thing with certainty: Ditching the city life is increasingly appealing. Maybe the answer lies in moving my family to the Monashees, feeding the kids from our garden, trading in the cell phone for a satellite phone, and letting our children run wild in the woods. ally, people find it weird that my husband and I share a cell phone. And most people over the age of 60 consider our children’s energy levels freakishly high—but then their parents have an equally hard time sitting still. Having spent a year nestled up against the Alps, I can say one thing with certainty: Ditching the city life is increasingly appealing. Maybe the answer lies in moving my family to the Monashees, feeding the kids from our garden, trading in the cell phone for a satellite phone, and letting our children run wild in the woods. As for the creative and monetary pieces of the puzzle, perhaps I’ll market our mountain retreat to overextended, disillusioned families like ours. Time to reflect—this is priceless. Kate Wiley has recently returned from France, where she had the great fortune to call the Alps home for a year. She and her family are readjusting to life in the West Shore, finding the traﬃc all the more irritating and the wine far less palatable. Though Langford is a far cry from Thollon-les-Memises, Kate is discovering ways infuse her daily routine with some of the tranquility she found in the mountains. IslandParent.ca

FARQUHAR FAMILY SERIES

December 4 at 11am

Will Stroet of Will’s Jams As seen on Kids’ CBC

January 15 at 11am

Hamelin, a New Fable

Axis Theatre’s musical take on the tale of the Pied Piper

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November 2016

Emmanuel Preschool 2121 Cedar Hill Cross Road (by entrance to UVic) Children learn through play in our all inclusive, non-denominational Christian preschool. Great facility; outdoor play area and a gym for rainy day play! Two teachers with ECE certifi cation plus an assistant teacher to help with special needs children. A competent and caring teaching team!

Saying Sorry A

few months back a piece published in the Huffington Post generated a TwitMon/Wed/Fri morning class ter storm of controversy around the pros Tues/Thurs morning class and cons of coaxing a child to apologize 5 mornings a week when they’ve done something wrong. At the risk of oversimplifying the premise Phone 250-598-0573 of the piece, it argued that children should preschool@emmanuelvictoria.ca never be forced to apologize for bad bewww.emmanuelpreschool.ca havior. The central thesis followed a line of reasoning based upon the belief that young children do not have the ability to feel empathy for others (they do, according to leading psychologists) and, because of this, aren’t really sorry for actions they’ve committed that resulted in them hurting another person, either physically or emotionally. Therefore, the article argued, forcing children to apologize when they aren’t really feeling sorry is forcing them to lie. The article went on to advise parents to, instead, first apologize on their child’s behalf and then quietly use the teachable moment to instruct their child on why they shouldn’t be engaging in schaddenfruede while watching their playmate cry over being shoved off a swing and having their toy stolen. Uh huh… Parents and caregivers on both sides ASHLEY DEGRAAF | Specializing in Family Photography in the Cowichan Valley | www.ashleydegraaf.com of the issue weighed in with the typical combination of pop-psychology, new-age parenting advice, and even some true psychological critical comments from people who, academically at least, knew what they START THE SCHOOL YEAR STRONG were talking about. But what seemed to START THE SCHOOL YEAR STRONG be missing from the discussion was some START THE SCHOOL YEAR STRONG common sense. If your child could use a boost in school or struggled The first question we should ask is “Why at all last year, consider getting them support at the does anyone apologize for anything?” could use ayear! boost in school or struggled at help all last If your your child could use a boost inSylvan school struggled startchild of the school Give a or call, and Remember that line about how “love year, consider getting them support at start oforthe school Ifat your child could use agetting boost inthe school struggled all last year, consider them support at the them see success early in the year. Build better means never having to say you’re sorry”? year! Give Sylvan a call, andGive help themthem see success the of the school year! Sylvan a call, andearly help atstart allskills, last year, consider getting support atinthe study habits and increase confidence. It’s from an old movie with Ali McGraw, year. Build better skills, study habits and increase confi dence. them see success early in the year. Build better start of the school year! Give Sylvan a call, and help and I suspect that, (spoiler alert) had she skills, see studysuccess habits and increase confidence. not died before marrying Ryan O’Neal, them early in the year. Build better Sylvan of Vancouver Island he would have found out pretty quickly Sylvan ofincrease Vancouverconfidence. Island skills, studyServing habits and Westshore, Duncan, Nanaimo Serving, Victoria,Victoria, Westshore, Duncan, Nanaimo, BC V8N 1A6 that love, in fact, does mean having to say Sylvan of Vancouver Island sorry—a lot. Serving, Victoria, Westshore, Duncan, Nanaimo, BC V8N 1A6 And there’s a reason for that. When you Don’t wait until it’s too late. Start now. Sylvan Vancouver care about someone, you don’t want to Don't waitof until it's too late.Island Start now. Serving, Victoria, Westshore, Duncan, Nanaimo, BC V8N 1A6 SYLVANLEARNING.CA harm them, although all too oftent, we do. SYLVANLEARNING.CA Don't wait until it's too late. Start now.

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Saying sorry is an acknowledgment that you did something wrong. It’s a way of accepting responsibility and at least implicitly saying you’ll try not to do it again. Apologies also open the door for restitution in some form. And forgiveness. In the end, it can make both the offender and the victim of a wrongdoing feel a little better and repairs what, these days, is at times a pretty fragile social fabric. So here’s the thing—yes, if you as a parent become aware of something your little

Tim Collins

WINTER HOLIDAY PROGRAMS A wide range of full and half-day programs for all kids in Victoria ages 5–15, including:

Passion Sports Winter Elite Camp Five days of intensive basketball skill development

Winter Lights & Sights

Gymnastics, carpet bowling and festive sightseeing are all part of this action-packed camp

Holiday Baking (Beginners & Advanced) Get busy in the kitchen making treats to delight your friends and family Visit our website for information on these and other programs: www.smus.ca/winter, or call the Education Extension office at 250-370-6120

FOR ALL KIDS IN VICTORIA AGES 5-15

bundle of joy has done that warrants them apologizing, it isn’t enough to operate on the premise that they don’t have the emotional maturity to meaningfully apologize. Emotional maturity doesn’t occur in a vacuum and will not develop without being nurtured. No, you take your child by the hand, and you explain to them that what they’ve done is hurtful. You invite them to think about how they’d feel if it were done to them, and then, you ask them to apologize. And if they don’t do it meaningfully, you have them try again. There’s one more part of this equation. You can teach children what empathy is, and you can guide them to take responsibility for their mistakes. But if you really want to teach them what apologies are supposed to look like, try apologizing to them occasionally. Apologize when you’ve been staring at your smart phone for an hour while they’ve been trying to show you their latest trick on the playground. (I did that the other day when I found myself staring at my own smart phone while my granddaughter and I were out for what should have been her time.) Apologize when you snap at them because you’re frustrated about something entirely unrelated to anything they’ve done. Apologize when they deserve an apology—and mean it. And if you don’t get it right, do it again, until you do. It’s the best way of teaching them about other people’s feelings and the power of a sincere apology. Tim Collins is a writer and freelance journalist living and working in Victoria. IslandParent.ca

smus.ca

Family Law

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The place online where parents and grandparents get information about their community for their family: Read current and past issues of Island Parent Magazine. Visit our Marketplace to find businesses, programs and services that cater to the little person in your life.

GYMNASTICS Birthday Parties

Receive Island Parent e-newsletter for updates and exclusive contests. You can also enter our monthly and photo contests.

Come be part of our community at

IslandParent.ca 24 Island Parent Magazine

M N

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Growing Young Farmers

hat could be more fun than being outdoors in the garden with children, growing and eating healthy organic fruit and vegetables? Grower educators of the Growing Young Farmers School Program do just that while they educate, encourage and empower children to become lifelong farmers.

Debbie Pungente

Something for everyone! 5 8 0 J O H N S O N S T. V I C T O R I A , B C . 2 5 0 - 3 8 8 - 7 0 2 2 . B A G G I N S S H O E S . C O M

SMALL CLASSES. BIG POSSIBILITIES.

26 Island Parent Magazine

Visit the garden at one of the local schools and chances are you’ll find a thriving lasagna garden bed or two. Lasagna gardening is an easy, no-till organic gardening method, layering green and brown organic matter to create the perfect soil for growing food. Lasagna gardening is just one of the lessons in the Growing Young Farmers School Program. Other lessons include food security (or insecurity), mulching, composting, good bugs versus bad bugs, seed saving, companion planting, food forest, and hugelkultur, to name a few. The program has been well received, with participants looking forward to coming to the garden for both learning and fun. As Vancouver Island is said to have only three days’ worth of food supply in the event of a disaster, it is important that children know how to grow their own food to sustain themselves and their community. Knowing this is valuable and empowering for children, and it creates healthy minds and bodies. The program helps create future stewards of the earth by teaching these lessons at a young age, so children will continue using sustainable practices into their adulthood. Growing Young Farmers is a Canadian registered charity. Dave Friend created the program to inspire more people in a community to grow IslandParent.ca

food because of the threat to food security that comes from living on an island. Friend, or “Mr. Organic” to many children, makes lessons fun with antics that include shouting “abracadabra” when the hose “accidently” sprays participants when he is watering the garden. Growing Young Farmers started with one class of 27 students at Sidney Elementary School in 2011. Now there are roughly 850 participants and a wait list of teachers wanting to be involved. Grower educators also run the Growing Young Farmer summer camps for children ranging from four to 14 years old. For proof of the program’s success, just look at the children’s faces light up when they see the changes in the garden from week to week and when they get their hands in the dirt. Debbie Pungente is a grower educator working with Growing Young Farmers Society. Debbie was born and raised in Victoria and raised her two lovely adult daughters here too.

How to Create a Lasagna Garden Start by spreading cardboard and/or newspaper over the area you want to create your garden (and to kill the grass and weeds). Starting with a layer of soil you then start building your other layers… Alternate layers of browns such as fall leaves, pine needles, coffee grounds with layers of greens such as compost (vegetable and fruit trimmings – NO meat), garden trimmings, and grass clippings. The brown layers should be about twice as deep as the green layers, but it is not an exact science. Make sure to water between each layer to help with decomposition. The layered bed should be at least one foot tall, however two feet tall would be ideal as the bed will shrink down after watering and as the gardening season progresses. Once your layered bed is completed, go ahead and plant your seeds and seedlings and watch them grow. There are many advantages to a lasagna garden, including being an inexpensive way to grow food. It is good exercise, good for the environment (less watering), you get to enjoy the food you grow and you nourish your body—and community. For more information on Grow Young Farmers, visit gyfs.ca IslandParent.ca

Kids’ Dentist

Dr. Anita Gadzinska-Myers

is a Board Certified Specialist in Pediatric Dentistry and has a Fellowship in Special Needs Dentistry for children • Accepting new patients now (infants to teenagers) • Referral not needed • Member of Cleft Lip and Palate Team

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Victoria Pediatric Dental Centre 206–1830 Oak Bay Ave

www.victoriapediatricdentalcentre.ca

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New satellite location in Sooke 6750 West Coast Road – 3rd floor

Supporting and helping our community to grow by offering: • Computer Literacy

• Clinical Counselling

• Kids Summer Camps • Back to School support • Pro Bono Lawyers

• Community Events

• Customer Service Training • Christmas support through our Kettle campaign

The Salvation Army Stan Hagen Centre for Families 2695 Quadra St, Victoria BC V8T 4E3 (P) 250-386-8521 (F) 250-386-8279 Executive Director: Pat Humble, pat_humble@can.salvationarmy.org For complete list of services: www.sashcf.com Check us out on facebook! www.facebook.com/sashcf

November 2016 27

Family Calendar

For calendar updates throughout the month visit IslandParent.ca

N ovember Our Generous Sponsors

FRIDAY

Lego Stories at Sidney/North Saanich Branch Library. Especially for school-aged kids. Use the library’s Lego to create a masterpiece while you listen to stories. Creations go on display in the library until the next meeting. Ages 5-12. 3:30-4:30pm. Email sidney @virl.bc.ca or phone 250-656-0944 to register. Crafts for Tweens: Creative Collage at Bruce Hutchison Branch Library. Enjoy an afternoon of crafting with friends. The library will provide the art supplies and instructions; you provide the inspiration. For ages 10-12. 3:30-4:30pm. Register at gvpl. ca or call 250-940-GVPL (4875).

SATURDAY

Annual Market Bazaar at St. Aidan’s United Church. 21 stalls including jewellery, books, baking, toys, baking, vintage, Christmas store and much more. Thrift shop open. Drop-in hot dog lunch ($5, 10:30am2:30pm). Coffee shop. Free admission. 10am-3pm. Richmond Rd at Cedar Hill X-Rd. Langford Fire Rescue Pumpkin Smash at Millstream Village Shopping Centre. The Langford Fire Rescue will be offering the public the opportunity to submit their pumpkins following Halloween for a donation to Muscular Dystrophy and the LVFA Benevolent Fund. The pumpkins will be taken up the 105 foot ladder of a fire truck located at the Millstream Village Shopping Centre Parking lot and dropped from the top of the ladder. The West Shore Rotary will be offering a hot dog BBQ with drinks

28 Island Parent Magazine

for the event. Hot Dogs and drinks will be donated Nature Centre off Munn Rd. 2-4pm. 12+ years. 250by the Market on Millstream. All donations from the 478-3344. crd.bc.ca/parks. BBQ will also be donated to Muscular Dystrophy and Movie Night in the Pool: Jungle Book at PanLVFA Benevolent Fund. 11am-2pm. orama Recreation. Come for a movie night swim and watch this animated Disney classic on the big SUNDAY th inflatable screen while enjoying some popcorn. Ocean Aware Challenge at St. Margaret’s School. 7:30-9:30pm. 1885 Forest Park Dr. 250-656-7271. Learn about our ocean, celebrate girls in science, panoramarecreation.ca. find out about Ocean Networks Canada all while having some fun. Students will participate in fa- MONDAY th cilitated activities from the 7 Principles of Ocean Literacy. Register for one of two sessions: 8:30am- Ready, Set, Read at Sangster Elementary. Come for noon for girls aged 5-8 (+ Sparks and Brownies), or some pre-bedtime fun. Play games, enjoy snacks, 1-4:30pm for girls aged 9-17 (+ Guides, Pathfinders and listen to a few delightful stories and songs. and Rangers). Free and open to the public. 1080 This free evening is for children aged 0 to 5 years Lucas Ave. Register online at stmarg.ca. 250-470- and their parents/caregivers. Activities take place 7171. lhudson@stmarg.ca. in the school gym. Running shoes suggested. Wear pajamas if you like. 6-7pm. kkinghunt@sdy62.bc.ca. Drumming Up Your Inner Rhythm and Voice at University of Victoria Phillip T. Young Recital Hall. WEDNESDAY th Join the Victoria Grandmother’s for Africa for a fun-filled, voice raising, hand pulsing event. This is Ready, Set, Read at John Muir Elementary. See an interactive, intergenerational afternoon of song MON 7 for details. 6-7pm. kkinghunt@sdy62.bc.ca. and rhythm that promises to lift your spirits in the darkening days of November. 1:30-3:30pm. $30/ SATURDAY th adults; $15/13-18 years; $10/children 6-12. Children under 5 free. For ticket information, call Nelly at Salmon Sensation at Charters Interpretive Centre. 250-382-8259. Salmon have returned to the rivers. Drop in any time for fishy-fun activities, a craft, and guided walks with Walking the Boundary Layer at Francis/King Re- CRD Naturalists along the Charters River. A closegional Park. Join CRD Regional Parks guest naturalist, up look at these magnificent fish as they return to Kem Luther, on a voyage to the Boundary Layer. spawn and complete their life cycle awaits. Meet Learn about mosses, lichens, mushrooms, and small at Charters Interpretive Centre off Sooke River Rd. vascular plants in the forests of the Pacific Northwest All ages. 11am-2pm. 250-478-3344. crd.bc.ca/parks. and how they shape the ecosystems. Meet at the

IslandParent.ca

Cool It! at City Studio. Take part in a workshop to learn how to reduce your GHG emissions. Engaging for both parents and children with actions for each. After the workshop, parents will take home a 30 day challenge. All children will receive a goody bag for taking part. Free. 12:30-4pm. 742 Johnson St.

WEDNESDAY

Elephant, Piggie and Friends at Juan de Fuca Branch Library. Fans of Mo Willems’ Elephant and Piggie books will enjoy this celebration jam-packed with stories, a craft and a puppet play. For ages 5-8. 3:30-4:30pm. Drop in; space is limited. Register at Music Bingo & Minute to Win It at Greenglade gvpl.ca or call 250-940-GVPL (4875). Teen Lounge. From Ka-Broom to Defying Gravity and Stack Attack, come for your favourite Minute THURSDAY th to Win It challenges in the teen lounge. Have an ear for music & know all the lyrics to today’s Top 40 Elephant, Piggie and Friends at Esquimalt Branch tunes? There will be bingo too! 6-8pm. 1885 Forest Library. See WED 16 for details. For ages 5-8. 3:30Park Dr. 250-656-7271. 4:30pm. Drop in; space is limited. Register at gvpl.ca or call 250-940-GVPL (4875) for more information.

SUNDAY

Going Squirrelly at Francis/King Regional Park. What does it take to survive as a squirrel? With a CRD Regional Parks naturalist discover what keeps these furry creatures busy at this time of year. Meet at the Nature Centre off Munn Rd at 1pm. 5+ years. 250-478-3344. crd.bc.ca/parks.

MONDAY

Lounge. See SAT 12 for details. 6-8pm. 1885 Forest Park Dr. 250-656-7271.

SATURDAY

Oaklands Gift of Good Food Fundraiser at Copper Owl Lounge. Fernwood NRG and nine other Community Centres and Associations across Greater FRIDAY th Victoria are raising money to provide fresh and Open House at St. Margaret’s School. Come see healthy produce for families in need. All contributhe campus in action. Interested families are invited tions raised go directly towards providing a yearly to drop in between 9-11am and 1-3pm to take a supply of fruits and vegetables to families who may student-led tour, meet with faculty and staff, try on not otherwise have access to fresh, local produce. the red blazer, and find out why girls thrive here. Full 9-1am. $10/person (all proceeds to Good Food Box details at stmarg.ca. 250-470-7171. 1080 Lucas Ave. Victoria). 1900 Douglas St. 250-370-9101.

Wonderful Woodpeckers at Francis/King Regional Park. Discover all of the tricks of the woodpecker trade. What makes them so good at what they do? Join a CRD Regional Parks naturalist and learn how to identify different woodpeckers by sight, sound Pro-D Day Swim at Panorama Recreation. Come for Art Meets Science at Esquimalt Branch Library. and habits on this guided walk. Meet at the Nature a fun filled swim. 1-3pm. $2/admission. 1885 Forest Explore your favourite arts and sciences in a whole Centre off Munn Rd at 10:30am. BC Transit #70 or new way with Science Venture. Discover the science #72. 250-478-3344. crd.bc.ca/parks. Park Dr. panoramarecreation.ca. 250-656-7271. of music, investigate the art of biology, and more. For ages 7-12. 2-3pm. Register at gvpl.ca or call SUNDAY TUESDAY th th 250-940-GVPL (4875) for more information. Emergency Preparedness Workshop at Victoria Seasonal Safari at Mill Hill Regional Park. The leaves City Hall. Learn about the hazards that can affect Little Lego at the Library at Bruce Hutchison Branch are turning yellow, and the air feels crisp. Animals Victoria, what to include in your home emergency Library. Listen to stories and have fun with the li- know it is time to prepare for winter. Join a CRD kit, what you can do to minimize injury and protect brary’s Lego. For ages 4-6; parents and caregivers Regional Parks naturalist to play games, look at your home from an earthquake, and how to reunite are encouraged to attend. 3:30-4:30pm. Drop-in; leaves, and explore how raccoons, squirrels, bears with loved ones after a disaster. 1-3pm. 250-920- space is limited. For more information, visit gvpl.ca and more are collecting food in the fall and preparing or call 250-940-GVPL (4875). 3373. PrepareVictoria.ca. a winter spot to rest. Meet at the information kiosk in the parking lot off Atkins Ave at 1pm. All ages. BC Music Bingo & Minute to Win It at Greenglade Teen Transit #53. 250-478-3344. crd.bc.ca/parks. Elephant, Piggie and Friends at Saanich Centennial Pro-D Day Skate at Panorama Recreation. Come for Branch Library. See WED 16 for details. For ages 5-8. a fun filled skate. 1-2:20pm. $2/admission. 1885 For- 10:30-11:30am. Drop in; space is limited. Register at est Park Dr. panoramarecreation.ca. 250-656-7271. gvpl.ca or call 250-940-GVPL (4875).

IslandParent.ca

November 2016 29

Frozen Theme Skate at Panorama Recreation. Back by popular demand. Join Anna, Elsa, Olaf and Kristoff on the ice for another ‘Frozen’ theme skate. Music and costumed characters provided by Victoria Costumes. As a special treat, Victoria Costumes will be giving out ‘Frozen’ magnets and goodies to all the kids. 1-2:20pm. 1885 Forest Park Dr. panoramarecreation.ca. 250-656-7271.

WEDNESDAY

Ready, Set, Read at Sooke Elementary Elementary. See MON 7 for details. 6-7pm. kkinghunt@sdy62. bc.ca.

food, silent auction. Canteen will be open for lunch. 9:30am-3pm. Admission by donation. For more information, visit royaloak.sd63.bc.ca.

Furry Forest Friends at Elk/Beaver Lake Regional Park. Join a CRD Regional Parks naturalist for a Emergency Preparedness Workshop at James fun-filled forest walk with your young ones. Explore Bay New Horizons. See TUES 15 for details. 7-9pm. mammal adaptations, play the “camouflage” game, 234 Menzies St. 250-920-3373. PrepareVictoria.ca. and learn all about our furry forest friends. Meet at the Nature Centre off the main parking lot at 10am. MONDAY st 5 years and under. BC Transit #70 or #72. 250-478FRIDAY th 3344. crd.bc.ca/parks. Elephant, Piggie and Friends at Oak Bay Branch Library. See WED 16 for details. For ages 5-8. 3:30- Lego at the Library at Bruce Hutchison Branch Li4:30pm. Drop in; space is limited. Register at gvpl.ca brary. Listen to stories and have fun with the library’s Island Farms Santa’s Light Parade along Governor call 250-940-GVPL (4875) for more information. Lego. For ages 7-10. 3:30-4:30pm. Drop-in; space ment St (from Belleville to Chatham St). Floats and is limited. For more information visit gvpl.ca or call bands, entertainment and lots of fun for the entire family. Meet afterwards at Captial Iron for refreshStories on Fern: National Storytelling Month. The 250-940-GVPL (4875). ments from Island Farms and witness Santa officially Victoria Storytellers Guild welcomes you to hear and tell stories . Tea and goodies. Doors open at Laser Tag at Greenglade Teen Lounge. Panorama declare Christmas in Victoria open. Make sure to 7:15pm, stories start at 7:30pm. 1831 Fern St (park Recreation and Games2U have teamed up to bring a donation for the Mustard Seed Food Bank. on Begbie). $5; $3/students. victoriastorytellers.org. bring you one truly out of this world game of tag. 5:45pm. 250-382-3111. 6-8pm. 1885 Forest Park Dr. panoramarecreation. Emerging Local Children’s Author Roundtable ca. 250-656-7271. SUNDAY th at Saanich Centennial Branch Library. Four local emerging children’s authors will share their process SATURDAY th Super Slimers at Swan Lake Christmas Hill Nature in writing books and how they were published. Sanctuary. They’re slimy, slippery, and super cool Hosted by the Victoria Children’s Literature Round- Annual Craft Fair and Silent Auction at Royal Oak customers. Discover the mysterious world of slugs table. 7:30pm. Members free; $7/drop-in. Doors Middle School. Over 50 artists. Crafts, specialty and snails with games, slug goggles and slime open at 7pm.

30 Island Parent Magazine

IslandParent.ca

making. All ages welcome. Noon-3pm. Admission by donation. 3873 Swan Lake Rd. 250-479-0211. swanlake.bc.ca.

WEDNESDAY

Giggles & Wiggles at Juan de Fuca Branch Library. Little listeners with extra energy will enjoy action-filled stories, songs and rhymes. For young children and their families; children under 3 must be accompanied by an adult. 10:30-11:15am. Drop in, space is limited. For more information, visit gvpl. ca or call 250-940-GVPL (4875).

English Language Learner Storytime at Saanich Centennial Branch Library. Fun-filled stories, songs, rhymes and puppets for young English language learners and their families. For young children and accompanying adult. Wednesdays November 9-30, 10:30-11am. Drop-in; space is limited. More information at gvpl.ca or call 250-940-GVPL (4875).

community. Socialize with other young parents, enjoy a kids’ craft, let your little one explore the fully-equiped playroom, or have a look in the ‘free store’ for gently used children’s items and household supplies. Information available for local resources, advocacy and counselling support. The Y Young Moms Program also runs groups such as Mother Goose, Nobody’s Perfect, and Food Skills for Families. Thursdays 10am-noon. 250-382-1004.

Good Morning Storytime at Sidney/North Saanich Branch Library. Bring your littlest ones to the library for stories, songs, rhymes and movement. Ages 0-5. The No Ivy League at Uplands Park. Join this weekly Thursdays 10:15-11am, November 24-December 15. restoration group to help restore the endangered Garry Oak Ecosystem by removing invasive English 250-656-0944. Ivy. Tools and gloves will be provided, instruction given, and areas to work in will be determined by FAMILIES Oak Bay Parks Management Plan. Suitable for all Grandparents Raising Grandchildren Support Cir- ages. Sundays 1-3pm until November 27. Meet at the cles in Victoria. Every second Tuesday morning from grassy field on Beach Dr at the entrance to Cattle BABIES, TODDLERS & PRESCHOOL 9:30-11:30am or every second Wednesday evening Point. mlidkea@shaw.ca. from 6:30-8:30pm. A safe supportive place to meet Family Storytimes and Baby Times at the Greater others in a similar situation and to share information Monthly Dyslexia Information Sessions. Ending Victoria Public Library. Parents and caregivers are and resources. Call 250-384-8042 for more informa- dyslexia is now possible. Learn about the latest welcome and encouraged to participate with their tion, or visit parentsupportbc.ca. Province-wide toll developments in neuroscience and programs to children. Drop in; space is limited. Admission is free information and support line at 1-855-474-9777 end dyslexia quickly and with lasting results. Free information sessions held monthly with Marlene on a first-come, first-served basis. For a complete or email grgline@parentsupportbc.ca. Lewis, award-winning registered speech patholoschedule of drop-in programs, visit gvpl.ca or call Young Parent Drop-In at the Downtown Y. Free gist. Please phone 250-474-6368 for details, or visit 250-940-GVPL (4875) for more information. breakfast and drop-in for young parents in the end-dyslexia.com.•

O ngoing

GREA

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IslandParent.ca

THE POLAR EXPRESS

Returns in December The tradition continues

Located inside the Royal BC Museum 250-480-4887 • imaxvictoria.com

November 2016 31

Around

The Island

Get Your

N ovember

Visit IslandParent.ca for these and other events and resources for families from Cowichan Valley north to Campbell River and west to Tofino TUESDAY

Dad’s Night Out: Free Skate Night at Oceanside Place Arena. Dads, bring the kids out and enjoy a free skate together. 6:30-7:30pm. 250-248-3252. rdn.bc.ca/recreation. Glow in the Dark Skate at Frank Crane Arena. Skate in an atmosphere of dimmed lighting and special effects. Regular admission. 6:30-8pm. 250-756-5200.

friday

Nanaimo Community Home Learners Monthly Meet-up at Oliver Woods Community Centre. Resource library, gym time, parent support, special events throughout the year. 1-4pm. $5/drop-in fee per family or $20 year-long membership. nanaimocommunityhomelearners.org.

THURSDAY

Snow Art and Skate Pro D Camp at Oceanside Place Arena. A day off school makes for a great day at camp filled with snow-themed art in the morning and skating in the afternoon. 8:30am-4pm. 250-2483252. rdn.bc.ca/recreation.

SATURDAY

Princess and Pirate Family Swim at Ravensong Aquatic Centre. Wear your princess and pirate outfit for a parade on deck. This family swim will also have activities, prizes and crafts. 10am-noon. Regular admission. 250-752-5104. rdn.bc.ca/recreation.

SATURDAY

2373 R O S S TOW N R D, N A N A I M O

Evenings ~ 7:30 pm Dec 17-19 & 26-30, 2016 Matinees ~ 1:30 pm Dec 17, 18, 26 & 27, 2016 New Year’s Eve ~ 9:00pm

Salmon Tour at Big Qualicum River. Take a walk with a certified park naturalist and learn about the incredible natural world we have around us. There will be plenty of stops along the way that leave you with a greater appreciation for the wonders of the surrounding area. 10am-noon. $15.50/adult; $5/ children 6-15 with a registered adult. 250-248-3252. rdn.bc.ca/recreation.

All Tickets $16, New Year’s Eve $25

Tickets available at 250-758-7224 or nanaimotheatregroup.ca Sponsored by

Directed by Wendy Wearne Produced by Stephanie Symon

32 Island Parent Magazine

BRIAN LUFF

Starlight Skate at Nanaimo Ice Centre. Come out and enjoy the new soft light ‘stars’ and passive LED glow lights. A great night out for families. Regular admission rates. 7-9pm. 250-756-5200. IslandParent.ca

SUNDAY

Wiggling Worms at Bowen Park Lower Picnic Shelter. Are worms really slimy? Ever wondered what they eat or which end is their head? Come out and learn through games, crafts, and stories. This is a parent-participation course and is great for home-schooled children. For 3-6 year olds. 10-11am. $8/person. 250-756-5200.

SATURDAY

Coastal Community Credit Union Sponsored Skate at Oceanside Place Arena. Join your friends for a free everyone welcome skate, courtesy of the Parksville Branch of Coastal Community Credit Union. 2-3:30pm. Free admission and skate rentals. 250-248-3252. rdn.bc.ca/recreation.

SUNDAY

Return of Star Wars & Dive-In Movie at Nanaimo Aquatic Centre. Discover the power of the “Force” by joining us for a Star Wars-themed event and movie. 1-3pm. 250-756-5200.

O ngoing PRESCHOOL

Pfeffernusse Latte Cookie &

Nov 12, 2016 -Jan 1, 2017

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Contest December 12 - 23

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Family Storytime at Cowichan Library, Duncan. Bring the whole family for stories, songs, rhymes and fun. For ages 0-5. Tuesdays 10:30-11:30am. 2687 James St. krumohr@virl.bc.ca.

FAMILY Family Pool Party at Beban Pool. End the hard work week with a party at the pool. Fridays 7-9pm, until December 9. 250-756-5200. Drop-in Science Studio at Departure Bay Eco School. At Nanaimo Science and Sustainability Society’s Science studio, kids are encouraged to explore the many interactive displays and activities. Activities include: 8 foot marble wall, 2,000 KEVA blocks, kid-friendly microscopes, wind tunnels, a high-powered air field, math puzzles, sign-out activities, and more. For safety purposes, children under 16 must be accompanied by an adult. $4/ child; adults free. Tuesday-Thursday 10am-noon; Thursdays 3-5pm; Saturdays 9am-noon. Schedule subject to change, so please check nanaimoscience. org for most current schedule. Lions Free Skate at Frank Crane Arena. Every Sunday noon-1:30pm. 250-756-5200. Parksville Lions and Save-on-Foods Family Skate at Oceanside Place Arena. Pond hockey not available during this session. Children must be accompanied by an adult. Sundays 12:15-1:45pm starting November 6. 250-248-3252. rdn.bc.ca/recreation.• IslandParent.ca

They’ll be at university sooner than you think. Make sure your family knows about the Canada Learning Bond

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If your child was born in 2004 or later and your family income is less than $45,000/year, you are eligible for up to $2,000 of free money for your child’s education after high school. For more information visit viu.ca/clb

November 2016 33

Immune-boosting Foods

I Does your child have difficulty reading? • can’t read words just read earlier • letter reversal • symptoms of dyslexia • “sounds out” words but can not blend them correctly • confuses similar sounding words • avoids reading/poor speller

t’s that time of year again—cold and flu season. If you have kids in childcare or school, then you probably get a visit from every virus that goes around. I know it’s coming, the moment when I have two children lying listlessly on the couch watching endless episodes of some inane television show. And even though I sometimes feel like joining them, I still have deadlines to meet and things to get done. Though I would give anything for a quiet moment to myself, a snuffling child on the couch reminds of the fact that it’s my job

your dose of vitamin C from bell peppers, broccoli, cabbage, cauliflower, kale and many other fruits and vegetables. Vitamin D: We get a good dose of vitamin D when we’re out enjoying the summer sunshine. However, from September to March, when there are fewer daylight hours, we don’t get enough vitamin D that way. I take a supplement throughout the winter months because it is said to be well absorbed by our bodies. Zinc: Red meats and shellfish are great sources of zinc. Some non-meat sources of

to keep moving forward, even if we’re all too sick to go anywhere. Despite the inevitable link between the dark months of winter and seasonal illnesses, there are some ways we can help boost our immune systems. Probiotics: Eating probiotic foods can help prevent bacteria and viruses from getting into your system. They are your immune system’s first level of defence. Good sources of probiotics include yogurt, kefir and other live cultured food like sauerkraut. As Islanders, we’re lucky to have access to good, locally made fermented products. I try to eat something fermented every day. Vitamin C: We’ve all heard that citrus is good for fighting colds. You can also get

zinc are dried beans and pumpkin seeds, which should be eaten with a source of vitamin C to improve absorption. Lifestyle: Chronic stress is said to reduce the immune system’s functioning. To combat stress, I try to take a few minutes of downtime every day (keep in mind that down time doesn’t mean screen time). We also need to get plenty of sleep and exercise every day to keep our system running smoothly. Supplements: Unfortunately there isn’t a lot of research to support supplement use for immunity (beyond vitamin D). However, everyone has their favourite cure, whether it is garlic, ginger, echinacea or elderberry. My rule of thumb: if it can’t harm you and

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Saanichneighbourhoodplace.com 34 Island Parent Magazine

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it’s not too expensive, then why not try it? There is a lot of evidence for the placebo effect, and that’s something I’m always willing to gamble on! These recipes are designed to be easy enough for older children to prepare on their own. I’ve also included suggestions for ways a preschooler can help.

Emillie Parrish Cooking With Kids Hearty Miso Soup

This soup is a full meal, and it is perfect for when you need something quick, healthy and warming. It’s my go-to soup whenever anyone gets sick because it is so nourishing and easy to digest. It is also a good substitute for the classic comfort of chicken soup. You can buy a probiotic miso in the refrigerator section of your grocery store.

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1 Tbsp minced ginger 4 cloves minced garlic 7 cups of broth 4 cups of chopped firm vegetables (carrots, cabbage, cauliflower) 1⁄2 lb of noodles 2 cups of soft vegetables (mushrooms, sweet peas, peppers) 1 block of firm tofu, diced (or cooked chicken) 1⁄4 cup miso paste green onion, diced 1. Sauté ginger and garlic until fragrant. 2. Add the broth and firm vegetables. 3. Bring to a boil and simmer for 20 minutes. 4. Add noodles, tofu and soft vegetables; simmer until the noodles are cooked (about 7 minutes). 5. Remove 1 cup of the broth and stir in miso paste, mixing until it is smooth. 6. Stir the miso mixture into the soup and season to taste (it will depend on the saltiness of your miso and broth, but usually I use 1⁄2 tsp salt). 7. Garnish with diced green onion. Omit the ginger and garlic if the flavours are too strong for your family; the miso will provide plenty of flavour.

Young children can help by chopping mushrooms, tofu and other softer ingredients.

Immune-boosting Smoothie

2 Tbsp pumpkin seeds 1 banana 1⁄2 cup of orange juice 1 tsp vanilla 1 tsp honey Optional immune boosters: 1⁄4 tsp ginger, peeled and finely chopped 1 Tbsp fresh lemon juice 1⁄8 tsp turmeric 1. Soak pumpkin seeds in 1⁄2 cup of water for at least 2 hours (or overnight) 2. Put all the remaining ingredients into a blender and pulse until well combined. Young children can be afraid of noisy blenders. Have them help make this smoothie by putting all the ingredients into the blender and let them push the buttons. The noise won’t be as surprising if they control it themselves. Emillie Parrish loves having adventures with her two busy children. She lives in Victoria and is the author of the fermentation-based blog fermentingforfoodies.com.

November 2016 35

Broken Rules

couldn’t help but recall the time I made a rule, “No eating in the car,” as I discovered yet another fossilized French fry under the passenger seat. Then there were the greasy hand prints, fruit smears, sticky half-eaten candies, cracker crumbs, yogurt stains, and a week’s worth of yuck I cleaned up from my car, not to mention empty water bottles, toys, stickers, dirty soothers, and the entire beach from the local park. As I cleaned, I was frustrated I broke this rule I set when Jack was a baby. Realistically, and fast forward almost five years and another child, Audrey, it’s nearly impossible not to eat on the go. Before I had the kids, I had visions of what parenthood would look like. But did I ever imagine days where instead of rolling on lipstick and baking cookies with the kiddos,

I would be smearing on war paint, launching into battle mode and giving myself pep talks to get through the next hour without completely losing it? Probably not. I shouldn’t be surprised the lipstick-wearing, cookie-making daydreams didn’t come true. So cute and innocent, I was? So naïve, though. The car incident got me thinking, “How many other rules have I broken?” And was I alone? Were other parents just as delusional? Apparently not. Here are some of the responses I received when I asked on a social media post: “What rules as parents have you broken?” “Being a very young and idealistic tree-planting feminist who thought that television/mass media was the source of all

violence and evil and children should never be babysat by a screen, I remember very clearly the morning I staggered out to the living room after being awake all night with my newborn to ask my 26-month-old if he wanted to watch Winnie the Pooh again,” replied Cowichan midwife Selina Boily. Another mom, Masika Allan, added: “I said I would never be that parent whose toddler was running around with snot coming out of their nose. Little did I know you would have to wipe their nose every 30 seconds for them to be snot-free.” Allison Hutchinson vowed she would never use food as an incentive, to avoid “forming a bad relationship with eating.” She quickly discovered “how motivating the odd treat was” and added she probably uses food bribes more than she cares to admit. Apparently TV and screen time is a common broken rule. “When the boys were newborns I was super strict about the TV never being on in the house,” said mom of twin toddler boys, Carli Truant. “I remember thinking my kids wouldn’t watch any TV until they were school-age…I’ve since learned that throwing two toddlers in front of Paw Patrol for 20 minutes is the only way to guarantee

For more information contact the programmer in your area: Campbell River: cmay@strathconard.ca or 250-287-9234 Nanaimo:

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36 Island Parent Magazine

IslandParent.ca

they won’t kill each other if I need to get something done.” Dad Troy Giles raised the soother issue. “As soon as my child is old enough to ask

Ashley Degraaf Is There an App for This? for a do-do (pacifier) that’s when it stops,” he recalled saying early on. “Yeah right!” And even breastfeeding came into question. “Before I had children I swore I would never, ever breastfeed my kids after they were a year old,” said Sarah Byrne, mom of two girls. “Then I had Isla, was not ready to wean her at a year and became educated. I nursed her until she was almost four, tandem fed her and Harlow for two full years, and am still nursing Harlow at three. I have become a nursing advocate and don’t regret my decision for a second.” And then there’s the issue of fast food. Lyndie Kendall vowed never to let her children eat fast food. “Not that it’s a weekly happening but (we’ll eat fast food) in a pinch.” And Kendall’s son has figured out that when his mom orders an Earl Grey tea latte he is guaranteed a treat. What about keeping things clean? “I remember thinking how disgusting it was that (my friend) had a pile of diapers by her fireplace in her living room, which was the diaper changing station,” said mom of two Michaela Peet. “I mean how hard is it to get up and put (the diapers) in the garbage? Fast forward three years and I had a pile to put her’s to shame. Children are humbling.” And lastly a reflection of the bigger picture. “I’m going to work my kids in to my life, not the other way around,” said mom of two girls Scarlett Feltrin. “They now rule me.” No matter how many rules we set and break and remake and re-break, we simply have to remember it often doesn’t really matter one way or the other. We’re the ones setting the rules so who’s going to punish us if we break them?

A visit a day keeps the doctor away Did you know that social connections are as important to your health as exercise or diet? And they’re fun! Find social centres, support groups and opportunities for recreation, learning and volunteering. Then see which public transit routes and regional trails serve these locations. Visit the CRD Community Map: maps.crd.bc.ca/community

Ashley Degraaf is a freelance writer based out of the Cowichan Valley. She enjoys channeling her inner momma while chronicling her daily adventures with her children. IslandParent.ca

November 2016 37

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38 Island Parent Magazine

Second Guessing & Second Thoughts W

e recently had to reverse a pretty big decision we had made regarding our kids: we decided to not homeschool them this year, after homeschooling last year. It was a decision they weren’t happy with, and one we felt bad making. We didn’t see this coming, but that’s precisely the point: you don’t always see life coming. Sometimes things change, and that can be really hard when you’re a parent. We felt like we were backing down when we decided not to continue homeschooling, but we parents need to allow ourselves a bit of flexibility. And maybe we need to learn to never speak in absolutes; when will I learn to never speak in absolutes? Now, I never say wise things. Ever. I say generally horrible things when trying to make a situation better. At best, I say nothing. I’m the worst. Anyway, while talking this over with my wife (who is much, much wiser than me), I did say something wise. We were talking about the positives and negatives of the situation, and I realized we were spinning down a spiral of negativity, talking about the drawbacks to both sides. I said—and you can use this next time you need to say something profound and positive, unless your significant other also reads this column, in which case that’s really not a good idea—“Sure, there are negatives to both, but why don’t we just think of it this way instead: there are positives to both.” Looking back at that now, I think it sounds really clumsy and kinda daft, but, regardless, it’s a good sentiment. Let’s take a step back and realize we’re choosing between two pretty cool things for our kids. That thought helped me out a bit because I was feeling pretty bad about changing our minds.

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We shouldn’t dwell on regret for making decisions as parents, even if sometimes the outcomes of those decisions aren’t what we expect. Even if sometimes those decisions contradict earlier ones. Even if those decisions keep us up at night, we’re making them for the right reasons. I keep waiting for parenting to get easy. I keep telling people with a half-convincing eyebrow raise that things are easier now that my little ones are past the…what’s that called when they’re between, like, zero and four? Those years. And I believe it, half the time, because it’s true at least 75 per cent of the time things are getting easier. Still, although the problems may be fewer, they come with bigger heartbreaks. And from what I understand, that pattern continues as the years go on.

Looking for a way to support Syrian refugees on Vancouver Island? in the As seen lonist Times Co

Greg Pratt Dadspeak Just remember to keep making the decisions that feel right, even if those decisions hurt in the moment. You know what you’re doing. You know what’s best. Sometimes it just hurts a bit, and quite often it hurts more than you ever knew it would. When I was on my way to becoming a father, people liked to tell me things about how being a dad is the “best thing in the world.” I’m now convinced the only people who said this to me were non-humans planted in my life for some nefarious purpose I haven’t figured out yet. But it’s funny, during those pep talks no one told me, “Oh, and parenting will also tear your heart out and crush it.” That’s not to say it isn’t worth it: it is. It—totally, 100 percent—is. But there’s always the potential for those moments to rise, those days filled with crushing doubt brought on by decisions you had to make, and, sometimes, decisions you had to reverse. Just hang in there during the times of doubt. Trust doing what’s right. And keep doing it.

“A n a stonishing book that allows the humanity of refugees to speak louder than politics and introduces readers to one of Syria’s incredible artists.” —K IR K US R EV I EWS , starred review

Inspired by the stone artwork of Syrian artist Nizar Ali Badr, Saltspring Island author Margriet Ruurs has created a story for all ages about the Syrian refugee crisis. Partial proceeds from the sale of the book will be donated to Syrian resettlement.

www.steppingstonesthebook.com Greg Pratt is the father of two children and a local journalist and editor. His writing has appeared in, among other places, Today’s Parent, Wired, Revolver and Douglas. IslandParent.ca

November 2016 39

Prenatal Screening

A Healthy Families, Happy Families

Child, Youth & Family Public Health South Island Health Units Esquimalt Gulf Islands

250-519-5311 250-539-3099

(toll-free number for office in Saanichton)

Peninsula 250-544-2400 Saanich 250-519-5100 Saltspring Island 250-538-4880 Sooke 250-642-5464 Victoria 250-388-2200 West Shore 250-519-3490

Central Island Health Units Duncan Ladysmith Lake Cowichan Nanaimo Nanaimo Princess Royal Parksville/ Qualicum

250-709-3050 250-755-3342 250-749-6878 250-755-3342 250-755-3342

Port Alberni Tofino

250-731-1315 250-725-4020

250-947-8242

North Island Health Units Campbell River 250-850-2110 Courtenay 250-331-8520 Kyuquot Health Ctr 250-332-5289 ‘Namgis Health Ctr 250-974-5522 Port Hardy 250-902-6071

viha.ca/prevention_services/ 40 Island Parent Magazine

new pregnancy can be very exciting. Is it a girl or boy? What colour will their eyes be? Will the baby look more like Mom or Dad? Most new parents look forward to office visits and ultrasound procedures to reassure them their baby is healthy. However, a small number of parents will learn that their baby is different. Two to three per cent of babies are born with some sort of difference, ranging from physical differences like heart defects to genetic differences like Down syndrome. Down syndrome is a condition that results from an extra copy of a chromosome (also called trisomy 21). Chromosomes are the structures that contain our DNA. A balanced set of chromosomes is important for healthy fetal development. Down syndrome, which happens by chance, occurs in around one in 700 pregnancies. While it is more common in older moms, this condition can also be present in pregnancies of young mothers. Pregnant women and their partners can consider options to test for a chromosomal disorder such as Down syndrome with prenatal genetic screening tests. Some prenatal genetic screening tests are available to all pregnant women in B.C. and are covered by MSP. While these tests estimate the possibility that the baby has Down syndrome, they are not able to completely confirm or exclude the chance of a chromosomal condition. If the result indicates an increased risk, there are follow-up tests that can determine more accurately if the baby has a chromosomal condition such as Down syndrome. Results can be determined as early as 10 weeks into the pregnancy. The earlier in the pregnancy a mother sees a health care provider, the more options are available to her. The Serum Integrated Prenatal Screening (SIPS) and Integrated Prenatal Screening (IPS) tests both use blood tests that measure hormones from the placenta circulating in the mother’s blood to assess the genetic risk of the fetus. The IPS includes an early ultrasound for additional information. Panorama™ and Harmony™ testing are two other prenatal blood test options. These are more accurate and non-invasive prenatal screening tests (NIPT). Routine ultrasounds at 18 to 20 weeks gestation can also look for features that increase the chance of a chromosome condition. The B.C. prenatal screening program

with SIPS involves two blood samples. The first blood test is taken within the first 9 to 14 weeks of the pregnancy and the second is taken in the 15 to 21 week period. In addition to estimating the chance of Down syndrome, this test can also screen for trisomy 18 (Edward’s syndrome) and a range of birth defects of the spinal column like spina bifida. Since the chances of having a baby with Down syndrome increases with mother’s age, pregnant women who will be older than 35 years at the time of delivery may be offered a Nuchal Translucency (NT) ultrasound. This is done in the 11 to 14 week period of the pregnancy and measures a fluid space at the back of the neck of the fetus. This provides additional information to assess the risk for the baby. An NT ultrasound is also offered to mothers carrying more than one baby, for example twins or triplets. There are two possible outcomes of genetic screening tests: screen positive or screen negative. Screen negative means that there is an extremely low chance that the baby will be born with any of the previously mentioned conditions. Screen positive means that there is an increased chance that one of the conditions could be affecting the baby. These tests will not provide a specific diagnosis; further testing to confirm results may be required. Most of the time, a baby with a screen positive result will be born healthy and unaffected; these are called “false positive” results. If the test is screen positive for Down syndrome or trisomy 18, an amniocentesis or Non-Invasive Prenatal Testing (NIPT) will be offered. If the tests are screen positive for spina bifida, a detailed ultrasound and referral to a specialist will be arranged. It is important to confirm the diagnosis before considering any interruption of pregnancy because of the chance for false positives. An amniocentesis is a test that takes a fluid sample from the amniotic fluid around the baby. This can be used to get an accurate diagnosis of a chromosome condition in the baby, called a karyotype. The number of chromosomes is counted and each of the chromosomes are examined to ensure they are intact. This test does have a one in two hundred (0.5 per cent) increased chance of a pregnancy loss, a miscarriage. The alternative option is an NIPT blood test. This test is only funded by BC MSP when the pregnancy has already been determined to be at increased chance for a

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chromosome abnormality. NIPT is a more accurate way of determining the chance of Down syndrome, as well as other common chromosome conditions including trisomy

Hayley Bos & Gudrun Aubertin Ch i ld Yo u t h & Fami ly P u b l ic H e a lt h

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18. A negative result from NIPT is very reassuring in providing a low chance of Down syndrome, while a positive result is associated with an extremely high likelihood of Down syndrome. However there is still a small chance of false positives with NIPT and positive NIPT results should be confirmed with amniocentesis before any decisions are made about interrupting the pregnancy. There are two different NIPT tests offered in B.C.: Panorama™ and Harmony™. For women with a positive prenatal screening test, the cost of these tests is covered. Amniocentesis, in these circumstances, is also covered by the B.C. health care plan. Pregnant women are presented with a number of options to learn about the genetics of their baby. There are many factors to consider when deciding whether or not prenatal genetic screening is the right option for you and your partner. First, you both need to decide if you want to know if the baby has Down syndrome or another common chromosome condition, or spina bifida. If the screening test is positive, would you consider having the amniocentesis? What would a diagnosis of a chromosome condition in the baby mean to you and your partner? In this situation, there are choices including the choice to continue or to interrupt the pregnancy. Couples who would never consider interrupting a pregnancy may still want to have this testing in case they need to prepare for the birth of the affected baby, while others may opt against testing out of concern for the increased anxiety that could result. It’s important to remember that having prenatal screening testing is a choice that you and your partner will make, knowing what is right for you. For more information about the B.C. Perinatal Screening Program, visit perinatalservicesbc.ca.

Dr. Hayley Bos, Maternal Fetal Health and Gudrun Aubertin, Medical Geneticist on behalf of Child, Youth & Family Health. IslandParent.ca

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November 2016 41

Brain Fog

ust the other day a new mom asked me, “Will I ever get out of this brain fog? How come I can’t think straight?” Baby brain, momnesia, breastfeeding brain—call it what you want—but every new mother I know has experienced temporary memory loss. Absent-mindedness is one of the many hallmarks of being a new parent. Maybe you have run up the stairs only to wonder why you are there or perhaps you forgot your neighbour’s name. During the exhausting and confusing first months of motherhood, this seemingly cognitive impairment can become a familiar feeling. Researchers began studying the theory of baby brain because women frequently report cognitive changes, particularly forgetfulness, during pregnancy and shortly after becoming mothers. Studies examining the relationship between pregnancy or the early stages of motherhood and changes in a woman’s ability to think, however, have produced conflicting results. Probably the most easy and most obvious link to make is lack of sleep. Missing out on just a little bit of sleep over a long period of time has been shown to cause cognitive difficulties, particularly with complex brain functions like multi-tasking, planning, and taking in and organizing a lot of different pieces of information. Some sleep experts say that sleep is where we assemble the happenings of our days and store them in long-term memory banks. It is sleep fragmentation that affects your memory—you may be accumulating a decent number of hours across the night, but if you are getting interrupted you are probably not getting the deeper, more restorative stages of sleep. Hormones like cortisol have been proven to have the ability to have a negative effect on your brain function.

42 Island Parent Magazine

Cortisol is our major stress hormone, which provides us with the energy to cope with any increase in demand or any threat at hand, which is a good thing. Pregnant and post-partum moms have an excess of cortisol, which is necessary for fetal development and to give them the energy to endure the strains of giving birth. However, these hormones can shut down the areas in your brain that would allow you to think more clearly. Disrupted sleep patterns can cause a rise in cortisol levels. Every time you wake

are required to quickly learn a wide array of new skills and tasks in order to take care of their babies: there are more demands on postpartum brain as one navigates the new role of parenthood. Unfortunately the postpartum brain is usually sleep deprived and dealing with the emotional effects of the transition. Moms may feel more forgetful regarding things which are not baby-related, considering all the changes they experience in their life during the first few months postpartum. As the duties of motherhood become more routine and sleep gets more regular, the demands on your brain are lessened, which should mean you can start thinking more clearly.

up in the middle of the night, your cortisol level can spike. This is a good thing because it gives you the energy to get up and get going in the morning, but of course in the middle of the night, it is not helpful. This might explain why it can be so hard to get back to sleep after settling baby. For some women, disrupted sleep can become a chronic problem, even once children start to sleep better. It is not just frequent wake-ups that take a toll on your brain function. New moms

Despite past research in humans suggesting that up to 80 per cent of new mothers can suffer memory loss for up to 12 months after giving birth; the findings suggest infantrelated memory may improve during these early months of parenthood. There may be scientific truth in this ‘baby brain’ syndrome—and that there is a very good reason why expectant mothers develop short-term memory loss. The suggestion is that women’s brains change during pregnancy so that they

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will be better able to concentrate on their newborn’s needs after the birth, with the result that they become less focused on other things, such as where the car keys might be. Some studies have shown that pregnancy

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Diana Hurschler New Parent Pages

Diana Hurschler, RN BscN, childbirth educator, certified breastfeeding counselor, has been helping families in their childbearing years and beyond since 1998. Diana is the proud mama of four little ones. Email diana@hurschler.com. IslandParent.ca

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impairs a woman’s memory during pregnancy and shortly afterward, possibly due to hormonal changes, sleep deprivation or the stress of coping with a major life change. At least one study has suggested that short-term memory problems during pregnancy might be linked with depressed mood. However, further research is needed. Other studies have shown that pregnancy and motherhood have no negative cognitive impacts. If you are becoming very forgetful, this may be your cue to simplify your life. It is easier said than done, of course. Try to prioritize the important things. I have a to-do list a mile long but I circle only the things that absolutely have to get done in a particular day. This helps to reduce the feelings of being overwhelmed and stressed. You do not have to repaint that room you have been meaning to, right now. Or declutter your entire house. This self-imposed stress can over tax you and lead you to forget things. If you cannot think straight, please take some time out to clear your mind. We think of nutrition and exercise as the key components to health, and sleep is undeniably a necessary piece. To stave off the potentially damaging effects of too much cortisol, make sleep a priority. Try as best you can to get back to a healthy sleep-wake pattern with a sufficient amount of sleep that would allow your system to recover from the stresses that occur during the day. Becoming a mother involves an emotional and physical transition. While you’re adjusting, try to focus on the positive aspects of motherhood and the journey ahead. Take a long bath, go for a walk. Once baby is asleep, have a leisurely dinner with your partner, or put your feet up. And ask for help from family and friends. Take good care of yourself!

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Christmas Goody Contest Send us the recipe for your family’s favourite CHRISTMAS GOODY and we’ll enter your name into the draw for a $50 gift certificate to your favourite bakery. A selection of recipes will be printed in the December issue of Island Parent. Please e-mail recipes (with Christmas Recipe in the subject) to editor@islandparent.ca. Contest deadline: Monday, November 14, 2016. November 2016 43

Fall reads

regon illustrator Carson Ellis’s work is colourful and whimsical, humane and magical. The artist for the indie band The Decemberists, and the illustrator of, among other projects, The Mysterious Benedict Society and the very Portland, somewhat slow middle-grade trilogy The Wildwood Chronicles (written by Ellis’s partner in life, Colin Meloy, the Decemberists’ singer), shines bright in her first solo book efforts, the picture book Home (Storey Publishing, 2015) and the recent Du Iz Tak? (Candlewick Press, 2016) Nest, shell, apartment, boat, wigwam, rock n’ roll tour bus—the many variations of where people live, cozily, busily, together and alone, are richly imagined in Home. Ellis’s pictures are filled with windows and drawers—things you want to peer into, go into—and busy with people and birds and dogs. There is even the home of a “moononian,” with a window looking out on a desolate lunar landscape, and of an Atlantian, blowing a conch shell underwater. “I just like to draw environments,” Ellis said in an interview with Kirkus Review. “I think it’s fun to invent spaces, to fill them with things, and to wonder about their inhabitants. I was pretty sure some kids would think this was fun too.” The pictures will prompt any child to appraise his or her own living space as a home. As with Home, there is a lot to study in Du Iz Tak? This delightful story is imagined from an insect’s point of view. The large pictures show a single plant’s growing and blooming and decaying through the seasons, as insects nearby keep busy—reading, playing the fiddle, cocooning (literally), and building a fort in in the plant’s leaves. A spider arrives to wreak havoc, but a bird

swoops down to nab it. Then a flower blooms, amazing everyone. The book’s charm lies in its spare text, which is of entirely invented words. The young reader must make sense of them, and it is surprisingly easy, with room for comfortable invention. If everyone is yelling “voobeck!” when the spider arrives, you can imagine what it means. And “booby voobeck”? Well, you sort of know. Hairy? Big? The book celebrates language as funny noises and unites meaning with context— reading it, you almost remember what it is like to learn to talk. (Ages 3 – 7) Sara O’Leary’s A Family is A Family is A Family (Groundwood, 2016) is an affirmation of the many forms that a family can take. “We were talking about families at school,” the book begins. “The teacher asked us what we thought made our family special.” The narrator is unsure what to say, feeling that their family “is not like everybody else’s.” But everybody else’s family is not like anybody else’s either. “One of my dads is tall and one is short,” says one child, adding, “They both give good hugs.” Another says, “Because I live with my grandmother, people often think she’s my mother.” She then adds, “She’s not. She’s my everything.” The picture of the girl playing soccer with her grandmother will make you cry—Leng’s vivid yet gentle artwork holds you like testimony. As for the narrator’s family? You’ll have to read the book to find out! (Ages 3 – 7) Warm and personal, The Year of Borrowed Men, (Pajama Press, 2016) by Michelle Spuler and illustrated realistically by Renne Benoit, will get readers immediately interested in history, and asking about World War II. As the publisher notes explain, “When World War II ‘borrows’ the men in seven-year-old Gerda’s family, the German government sends three new men in return…three French prisoners of war who must sleep in the an outbuilding.” The relationship that develops between young

Gerda and the French soldiers, who have children back home, is nuanced, complex, and hopeful. The true story shows that war is filled with acts of peace. (Ages 4 – 9)

Sara Cassidy Book Nook What joy to have a new Kit Pearson book in the world. Set on the edge of Victoria on a day in 1881, A Day of Signs and Wonders (HarperCollins, 2016) is thoroughly engaging. The novel unfolds a single long, full day in the girlhood of Emily Carr. The detail is lush, excitement abounds—as does cake—and each character is beautifully whole, and complicated. The best part is Pearson’s young Emily, barefoot, flouting convention, stuffing her pinafore in a bush, and trying watercolours for the first time – her painting looks like a mess to others, but she is fiercely proud of it. (Ages 8 – 13) BUZZ BOOK: Stepping Stones: A Refugee Family’s Journey (Orca Book Publishers, 2016) is on everyone’s lips. When Salt Spring Island writer Margriet Ruurs stumbled on the artwork of Syrian Nizar Ali Badr online, she knew she had to contact him and make a book about refugees with his richly emotional pictures, which he makes with stones found on the beach. It was not easy to connect with him, but she persevered. Orca Book Publishers, too, met obstacles, getting paycheques and author copies into a country torn by war. The book’s poetic text shares a boy’s journey with his family “away from the bombs.” They walk and walk. “When I grew so tired and cried, Papa told me we were walking toward a bright future.” The book is in both English and Arabic, but is already being translated all over the world, even in Vietnam—a first for Orca. A terrific companion book would be Adrift at Sea: A Vietnamese Boy’s Story of Survival, recently published by Pajama Books. It is the true story of Tuan Ho, one of the “boat people” who arrived in Canada in 1981, as told to Marsha Forchuk Skrypuch. The illustrations, by Brian Deines, are stunning—gripping, harrowing and hopeful.

Attention Non-Profit Organizations Would you like your informational brochures or magazines professionally distributed to 16 high traffic areas in Greater Victoria?

Victoria Community Information Services (VCIS), an Island Parent Group subsidiary, services these locations on a weekly basis to ensure your brochures and magazines are highly visible for pickup by walk-by traffic. Our wall-mounted distribution boards are outside partnering grocery stores and inside many recreation centres. Space is available for either brochures (approx. 4" x 9") or magazines (approx. 8.5" x 11"). For distribution rates or additional information, please contact: Mark Warner publisher@islandparent.ca 250-388-6905

Sara Cassidy’s seventh book for children, A Boy Named Queen, is out now. “A small eloquent book with a powerful message.” IslandParent.ca

November 2016 45

Family Services Directory This directory, sponsored by Thrifty Foods, features not for profit agencies and organizations serving children, youth and families.

1Up, Victoria Single Parent Resource Centre (1-up.ca) provides support, education and resources for parents in the Greater Victoria area through free counselling, volunteer training for peer helper positions, a mentoring program for single moms and a support group for dads. The Centre also offers a variety of integrated life skills and parenting courses which are open to the whole community (fees are on a sliding scale). The Centre provides free toys and books, a clothing room and bread pantry for single parents. Donations of gently-used clothing, small household items, books and toys are welcome. Hours are Mon, Tue, Thu, Fri: 9-4, Wed: 12-7. 602 Gorge Rd. East; call 250-385-1114 or info@1-up.ca Beacon Community Services is a community-based non-profit agency providing social, employment, and health services to Saanich Peninsula, Greater Victoria, and Southern Gulf Islands residents. Beacon offers: child, youth, and family services; a drop-in family resource centre; counselling; employment services for adults, youth, and people with disabilities; home support; volunteer services and opportunities; community events; affordable assisted living for seniors; referrals, information, and resources; thrift shops. For Home Support information call 250-658-6407; for all other inquiries call 250-6560134, or visit beaconcs.ca.

are play and activity based designed to provide opportunity for participants to share in a comfortable and safe environment. For further info call 250-380-6363 or communityoptions.bc.ca. TM

our Parents Together program and parent workshops. For more information on all programs and services visit bgcvic.org or call 250-384-9133. Canucks Autism Network (CAN) provides high-quality, adapted sports, recreational and social programs for kids, teens and young adults living with autism on Vancouver Island. Shawnigan Lake: Multisport day camp, bike clinics and family camp. Victoria: Swim, soccer, skate and physical literacy. Nanaimo: Swim and physical literacy. Family events take place throughout the year! Become a member for only $25/year at canucksautism. ca/join. Call 604-685-4049, email info@canucksautism. ca or visit canucksautism.ca/VancouverIsland for more information. CHOICES Adoption & Counselling is a licensed, professional, non-profit agency that provides services to adoptive parents, birth-parents, and adoptees. CHOICES arranges adoptions domestically and internationally. We are committed to providing a comprehensive, clientcentered adoption service which best meets the needs of everyone in the adoption constellation. Please contact us at choices@choicesadoption.ca, or call 250-479-9811 for further information.

Beacon Community’s Employment Services. Beacon Community Services provides a full menu of employment services to the Saanich Peninsula, Southern Gulf Islands. We have been helping people find work since 1982! Our programs build on a client’s strengths and resolve barriers to securing and maintaining employment. Furthermore, we work in tandem with our employer network to support those residents looking for work. If you need help finding a job or need employees please pay us a visit! It’s FREE. 9860 Third St, Sidney, 250-656-0134, beaconcs.ca.

Community Living Victoria’s Autism Services offers dynamic community-based programs for children and youth (6 – 18 yrs) with Autism. We offer 1:1 Behaviour Intervention, Social Skills Groups and spring, summer and winter Day Camps. Our skilled and caring team draws from various behaviour support models to customize programming for each youth. Fun programming within safe, supportive environments motivate youth to expand their interests, gain confidence, strengthen social and communication skills, and build friendships. 250-477-7231. communitylivingvictoria.ca.

Boys & Girls Club Services offer after-school and evening social, educational and recreational programming for children and youth at 5 locations (Colwood, Langford, VicWest, Central Saanich and Esquimalt) and summer camps both in Esquimalt and at our Outdoor Centre in Metchosin. We also offer support to parents through

Community Options for Children and Families offers recreational support groups for Children and Youth age 6-18 who have a brother or sister with a disability. The Sibshop Program allows children and youth to connect with peers who understand what it is like to be a Sib. Sibkids (age 6-12) and Sibteens (age 13-18)

Family Services of Greater Victoria (formerly BC Families in Transition) is a non profit agency that has been serving families since 1978. We provide a full range of services to the whole family in supporting their relationship and through separation and divorce. Counseling, mediation, legal information and a range of group programs are available for children, youth and adults on a sliding fee scale. Call us at 250-386-4331 or visit fsgv.org. We can help. HappyBaby Sleep Solutions helps families create healthy sleep habits in babies and children so everyone is well rested and happy. Sukkie Sandhu, M.Ed., has worked with hundreds of families locally in Victoria and worldwide. Sukkie is a Registered Clinical Counsellor so the cost of a sleep consultation may be covered under your extended medical plan. For more information visithappybabysleepsolutions.com or call 250-857-1408 for a FREE evaluation. Let’s get started! HeadWay Victoria Epilepsy & Parkinson’s Centre supports families living with seizures by offering parent workshops three times a year, educational presentations in schools and community groups as well as providing tutoring sessions and one-to-one professional consultations to help your child live up to their highest potential. Keep up to date with the latest research about treatments, lifestyle, and safety issues for your child. We can be reached at headwayvictoria.com, or you can reach the Epilepsy Program Coordinator directly at 250-475-6677. Inter-Cultural Association of Greater Victoria (ICA) is a service agency for immigrants and refugees. Programs offered include cross-cultural counseling, parenting programs (child care available), family violence programs, employment services, interpretation and translation, diversity workshops and training, ESL instruction, volunteering, youth programs and tutoring, as well as intercultural arts programming. 930 Balmoral Rd, 250-388-4728, info@icavictoria.org, icavictoria.org. Learning Disabilities Association of BC, SVI Chapter, educates, supports and advocates for children and youth with learning disabilities and related conditions. Services include a public lending library, individual/ group support for parents and children, professional/

Maxine Fisher M.Ed., RCC, MTA

Counselling for Children, Families & Adults Over 20 Years Experience (Music Therapy Also Available)

Stress & Trauma (Acting Out) • Parenting • Family Transitions Physical & Learning Disabilities • Relationships • Individuals Skype & Phone Sessions Available M.Ed. | Registered Clinical Counsellor | Accredited Music Therapist

Call Today for a Complimentary 10 minute phone consultation Call 250-686-7582 maxinefisher@shaw.ca victoriafamilycounselling.com 46 Island Parent Magazine

IslandParent.ca

educational workshops for parents and professionals. Child and youth programs include: reading/ writing, academic skills, social/emotional skill development and Fast ForWord. 1562 Fort St, Victoria, BC V8S 5J2. Ph 250-370-9513. Fax. 250-370-9421. ldasvi.bc.ca. knowyourrights.ca. Military Family Resource Centre (MFRC) provides programs and services to the military family community including: 24-Hour Information Line; Deployment Information and Workshops; Short Term Counselling, Crisis Support or Intervention; Welcome/Relocation Services; Childcare and Family Support Services; Assistance for Families with Special Needs and Responsibilities. Call the MFRC: 250-363-2640 (1-800-353-3329) for information or visit esquimaltmfrc.com. Power To Be provides inclusive nature-based activity programs for youth and families living with a barrier or disability who need support to access recreation and their community. We create year-round programs to fit participant needs through activities such as kayaking, rock climbing, hiking, canoeing and more. Visit powertobe.ca or call 250-385-2363 to get involved. Sooke Family Resource Society (SFRS) provides Family Resource Programs including: Prenatal Education and Outreach, Parent-Tot Drop-In Groups, Parent Discussion Groups, Family Support Groups and Outreach, a Toy and Book Lending Library, and Kingfisher Preschool. Sooke-Westshore Child Care Resource and Referral services, as well as all-ages counselling services are also provided by SFRS. Services are provided from the Child, Youth and Family Centres in both Sooke and the Westshore. Call 250-642-5152 for more information or visit our website at sfrs.ca. SFRS’s Welcome Home Program is looking for homes that can support adults diagnosed with a disability looking to gain further independence. The livingsituations are varied and unique and can include living within a family home or a suite in the family home. The needs of the individuals are varied, dependent on the disability, but can include relationship building, life skills, meal prep, etc. For more information, please call 778-433-2023 or go tosfrs.ca. Sooke-Westshore Early Years Centres provide information to families about children and family services, supports, child development and parenting. The Early Years Navigator will assist families with referral information for local early years programming, child care, public health, special needs intervention services, and social supports. The Sooke-Westshore Early Years Centres are hosted by Sooke Family Resource Society and located at the Child, Youth, and Family Centres in both Sooke and the Westshore and can be reached at 250-217-9243. Additional information can be accessed at sfrs.ca/early-years-centre. Victoria Immigrant and Refugee Centre Society (VIRCS) supports immigrants and refugees living in Greater Victoria. Services are free and include one-onone counselling, parent education workshops, youth life skills classes, a preschool program, art therapy, language classes and academic support, employment help, computer classes and fun community events like free yoga, tai chi, dance and cooking classes. Visit us online at vircs.bc.ca or phone 250-361-9433.

IslandParent.ca

The Victoria School for Ideal Education • Daily meditation • Nature based learning • Small class sizes • BC curriculum K – Gr. 8 2820 Belmont Avenue

250-383-6654 vsie.ca vsie@shaw.ca A few spaces still available

Materials for all educators and families! Monday to Saturday: 9:30am – 5:30pm Sunday: 12:30pm - 4:30pm 2014 Douglas St, Victoria, BC V8T 4L1 schoolhouseteachingsupplies@shaw.ca 250-385-9030 | www.schoolhouseteaching.com

Enter Our Online Contests Every month at IslandParent.ca you can enter to win great prizes! Prizes include:

• Family Getaways • Gift Certificates • IMAX Passes • Books, CDs & More One entry per family per week. Check out the prizes and enter the contests by visiting

IslandParent.ca November 2016 47

Preschool & Child Care Directory CENTRAL SAANICH Chrysalis Child Care................................250-652-0815 A nurturing and stimulating environment for a small group of 21⁄2–5 year old children. Qualified ECE promotes learning through play. chrysalischildcare.ca.

Colwood/LANGFORD Goldstream Co-op Preschool....................250-474-3011 Learning Through Play for 3 and 4yr olds! For registration information go to our website: goldstreampreschool.com.

Island Kids Academy Esquimalt...............250-381-2929 High quality child care (ages 1-5). Preschool curriculum offered within a warm, caring all-day program. Character development using the Virtues Project. Access to community programs including swimming, skating, Victoria Conservatory of Music. Part-time spaces available. islandkids.ca. La Pré-Maternelle Appletree Preschool......250-479-0292 A French Immersion Program. 30 months to school age. Licensed Christian centre. prematernelleappletree.com.

Highlands

RIA Early Learning Centre........................ 250-590-0781 Reggio Program—for Preschool aged children. A unique learning environment—encourages each child’s development. reggiopreschool.ca.

Lexie’s Little Bears Child Care Inc........... 250-590-3603 Only seconds past luxurious Bear Mountain our highly respected outdoor program will not disappoint! Our “Nurture through Nature” facility is rooted from the Reggio-Emilia philosophies, allowing the children to use their environment as the “third teacher.” Located on 2 acres of forest land, your child will learn and grow in a natural surrounding of tress and wildlife! Newly expanded, we NOW have more spaces available for your Infant/Toddlers and Pre-Kindergarten aged children. We use the trees from our own property to build the furniture and some of the toys in all three centres. The children enjoy yoga, music, Spanish, sign-language and an outdoor classroom. In 2016, Lexie Biegun won the BC Provincial Gov’t award of Excellence for Child Care Providers. Please visit our Facebook page for current info. And pics, as well as our website at lexieslittlebears.com. Cub House waitlist: 778-432-3600.

CORDOVA BAY

METCHOSIN

Carrot Seed Preschool.............................250-658-2331 Where children can discover, imagine, construct and learn through play. Wondrous natural playground. carrotseedpreschool.com.

Metchosin Co-op Preschool..................... 250-478-9241 Est. 1960. Our school provides a beautiful natural play space and inclusive child led learning through play emergent curriculum. Two excellent ECEs per class provide loving and enriching family support. Half-day programs for 2.5-5 yrs. metchosinpreschool.com.

Leap Forward Childcare...........................250-818-9225 2758 Peatt RD. Licenced group childcare for children ages 6 months to 5 years old. Offering full-time and parttime care. Open 6:30am-5:30pm. For more information please contact Amber: info@leapforwardlangford.com, leapforwardlangford.com. Miles of Smiles Nature Junior Kindergarten................... 778-265-4374 Come See Why Learning In Nature Rocks! Reggio Influenced Philosophy ages 3-5. Have Your Child Become a Nature Detective Today! Email mosnjk@hotmail.com.

Cordova Bay Preschool........................... 250-658-3441 A bright and cheerful parent participation preschool with a philosophy of learning through play. 4 yr olds - M/W/F 9:151:15; 3 yr olds - T/Th 9:15-12:15. cordovabaypreschool.org. Lakeview Christian Preschool/Daycare..... 250-658-5082 30 mths to Kindergarten entry. Small group. Experienced teacher. Full time and part time spaces. Mornings only or full day. Monthly DROP IN STORY HOUR. For information please email lakeviewschol@shaw.ca.

ESQUIMALT Ciara Early Childhood Centre...................250-386-7369 Education and Fun Hand in Hand! Exceptional care for ages 1-5yrs. Inclusive nature inspired kindergarten readiness program with Christian values. Facebook.com/ CiaraEarlyChildhoodCentre.

West-Mont Montessori School.................250-474-2626 Preschool Montessori instruction in a beautiful natural environment in Metchosin. Ages 30 months and up. Providing a balanced approach to incorporating Nature, French, Music and Art into a complete educational program. Be a part of a community devoted to the development of the whole child. Open House: Thursdays 9-11 am. west-mont.ca.

North SAANICH In The Garden Childcare Centre.............. 250-654-0306 A GREAT PLACE TO GROW. Offering preschool, full day care, before and after school care for children aged 2.5 to 12 years old. Open all year.

OAK BAY

Gonzales Co-op Preschool....................... 250-727-1003 Children explore their imaginations in our learning-throughplay environments and large natural playground. Our Reggio Emilia inspired program focuses on art, nature, music and friendship. Over 50 years serving Victoria’s families. Nuturing and highly qualified ECE and ECE Assistant. Parent participation level options available, nut-free and allergy-aware. Join us! gonzalescooppreschool.com. Recreation Oak Bay.................................250-370-7200 Fully licensed, ECE Daycare, Preschool and Nature Preschool. Play based, child led learning. Afterschool care available.

SAANICH Arbutus Grove Children’s Centre..............250-477-3731 Formerly known as Goosey Gander Kindergarten. Half Day and Full Day Preschool Programs. Children’s learning is supported and nurtured through inquiry, exploration, play and creative expression. arbutusgrove.ca. Camosun College Child Care Services........250-370-4880 Quality licensed facilities on both campuses providing children, newborn to 5 years, with rich early learning experiences in a learn through play environment. camosun.ca/childcare. Carrot Seed Preschool.............................250-658-2331 Where children can discover, imagine, construct and learn through play. Wondrous natural playground. Extended hours starting Sept. carrotseedpreschool.com. Cloverdale Child Care................................. 250-995-1766 Register now for preschool 4 year olds Mon/Wed/Fri 9:00–1:00 & 3 & 4 year olds Tue/Thur 9:00–1:00. Full time Early Learning Centre 7:00am – 6:00 pm 3–5 year olds. Before and after school care. cloverdalechildcare@shawbiz. ca, cloverdalechildcare.com. Full o’ Beans Preschool............................... 250-360-1148 We offer ‘learn through play’ programming designed to foster your child’s natural curiosity and imagination. Flexible scheduling, 2.5 and 4 hour programs, qualified staff. Registration is ongoing! saanichneighbourhoodplace.com. Island Montessori House......................... 250-592-4411 Inclusive, integrated and nurturing Preschool and Kindergarten programs. Located in a lovely rural setting with a focus on nature and outdoor environmental activities such as gardening and composting. islandmontessori.com. Lakehill Co-op Preschool.......................... 250-477-4141 Where children’s development is nurtured through a child centered inclusive, play based program. Come visit our natural outdoor playground and meet our loving qualified ECE team. Multiple Levels of participation available, please enquire. lakehillpreschool.org.

Emmanuel Preschool.............................. 250-598-0573 Children learn through play in our non-denominational Christian preschool near UVic. Bright attractive setting. emmanuelpreschool.ca.

Child Care

Resource & Referral islandfamilyinfo.ca ccrr.bc.ca 48 Island Parent Magazine

Looking for child care? Need help with subsidy forms? Taking care of children? Need child care training? Your community’s best source of child care information and resources. Victoria & Gulf Islands: 250-382-7000 or 1-800-750-1868 Sooke: 250-642-5152 Westshore: 250-391-4324 Cowichan Valley: 250-746-4135 local 231 PacificCare (Ladysmith north): 250-756-2022 or 1-888-480-2273 Funded by the Province of BC

IslandParent.ca

Lambrick Park Preschool & Childcare........ 250-477-8131 Gordon Head’s only parent-participation preschool and childcare centre. Flexible options, play-based learning and outdoor play. Allergy friendly. Celebrating 40+ years. lambrickparkpreschool.ca.

Babies to Big Kids Childcare.......................250-590-2722 949 Fullerton Ave. Licenced group childcare for children ages 6 months to 11 years old. Offering full-time and part-time care. Open 6:30am-5:30pm. info@babies tobigkids.com, babiestobigkids.com.

Neighbourhood Junior Kindergarten....... 250-479-4410 Welcoming, culturally sensitive parent participation program in Lakehill School. Morning and afternoon. For 3s and 4s. See website for details. neighbourhood juniorkindergarten.com

Castleview Child Care............................. 250-595-5355 Learning Through Play & Discovery. Licensed non-profit, qual. ECE staff. Since 1958. Preschool and full-time care. castleviewchildcarecentre.com.

Oakcrest Preschool................................ 250-472-0668 A welcoming, nurturing environment with a large, bright facility. Learn through play with 2 caring ECEs. oakcrestpreschool.org. Pacific Christian School – Pre-School.......250-479-4532 Your child will love the playful, safe environment and caring staff at PCS Pre-School. Come and explore Educational Excellence to the Glory of God. PacificChristian.ca Rainbows & Dreams Preschool................ 250-479-1966 Small classes for 3-5 yr olds in a safe nurturing environment. Children learn through play and fun–developing a sense of confidence, independence and creativity. Highly qualified ECE teacher. Ready Set Grow Preschool....................... 250-472-1530 Inside Hillcrest Elm. in Gordon Head, we help children transition to Kindergarten. Licensed Preschool with highly qualified, warm ECE. heoscmanager@gmail.com. Rogers Child Care Centre........................250-744-2343 Trusted High Quality Non Profit Care since 1991. Year Round Early Learning and Out of School Care. For more info go to rogerschildcare.com. St. Joseph’s Catholic Preschool................... 250-479-1237 • A Christian child centre for 3–5 year olds. • A warm nurturing and challenging program • Offered by St. Joseph’s Catholic School. Wiseways Preschool & Daycare................ 250-477-1312 Quality, fully licensed, Christian preschool/daycare for 3–4 year olds. Experienced team of ECEs. Spacious facilities include large playground and indoor gym. Subsidized fees welcome. Call for a tour. wisewaysvictoria.com.

SIDNEY Acorntree Preschool................................250-686-1408 Balanced indoor/outdoor program, designed to stimulate natural curiosity and foster empathy and compassion towards others. We believe in the importance of both child and teacher directed activities. acorntreepreschool.ca. Positive Path Early Learning....................250-655-7244 Located near the library and Sidney School, our program has earned a stellar reputation for quality child care and is growing as fast as the children we care for. Space is available for your child to embark on a journey of active exploration and discovery, enjoying a natural outdoor playground and an expansive indoor learning space. Experienced educators foster a lifelong quest for knowledge and guide children with Christian values and virtues. positivepath@shaw.ca. Storyoga Preschool................................. 778-679-4004 Embracing and empowering children exactly as they are. Storyoga Preschool is a nature and yoga based program located in Sidney, BC. storyoga.com.

VICTORIA ArtsCalibre Academy.............................. 250-382-3533 Comprehensive programs for Preschool through Grade 6, delivering academic excellence through music, dance, drama and visual arts. Outstanding educators, locations and facilities. ArtsCalibre.ca

IslandParent.ca

Centennial Day Care............................... 250-386-6832 Exceptional childcare and education 35+ years. Nature inspired, play based program. NEW central, “green” building. centennialdaycare.ca. Christ Church Cathedral Childcare and Junior Kindergarten.......................... 250-383-5132 ECE and Specialist teachers provide an outstanding all-day, licensed program for 3–5 year olds. Spacious, renovated facility with a huge backyard in Fairfield. cathedralschool.ca. Nightingale Preschool and Junior Kindergarten Ltd....................250-595-7544 We offer education through creativity and play, providing rich learning experiences through a well sourced and stimulating indoor and outdoor environment. Early years reading programme. nightingalepreschool.com. Arts/Drama programme. kidsworks.ca. Parkdale Early Childhood Centre.............250-382-0512 ECEs offer the highest quality care and positive learning experiences in our daycare and preschool. Full time or part time. Call for a tour or visit us at parkdalechildcare.ca. Rainbow Express Daycare....................... 250-382-2314 A nurturing environment for children to learn through play and discovery in a natural setting. ECEs and specialist teachers. rainbowexpressdaycare.com. Close to city centre. Ross Bay Preschool.................................250-383-7445 Positive/supportive program motivating children to learn, discover and grow through play. Daily outdoor time, special guests and community events! rossbaypreschool @shaw.ca. The Sir James Douglas Playschool.......... 250-389-0500 Fun, creative and educational ECE program for 3-5 year olds to grow and develop life long skills. Come play and learn in our bright and modern centre in Fairfield. Victoria Montessori................................ 250-380-0534 Unique, innovative learning environment combining the best of Montessori and Learning Through Play. Open yr. round. 30mths–K. victoriamontessori.com. YMCA-YWCA Child Care Centres...............250-386-7511 Enriched programs for children 10 months – 5 years. Our programs support healthy child development and future school success. victoriay.com.

VIEW ROYAL Island Kids Academy View Royal.............250-727-2929 High quality child care (ages 1-5). Preschool curriculum offered within a warm, caring child care environment. Character development using the Virtues Project. Access to community programs including swimming, skating, Victoria Conservatory of Music. Part-time spaces available. islandkids.ca. Little Wonders Preschool (View Royal OSC)..................................... 250-744-2718 A creative and supportive program that will prepare your child for a lifetime of learning! Out of School Care is also available for school aged children. viewroyalosc.com. A Secret Garden Preschool..................... 250-380-8293 Program built on Christian values. Monthly themes, weekly topics and daily activities. asecretgardenpreschool@shaw. ca.

View Royal Childcare...............................250-479-8067 Preschool structured, high quality childcare. Victoria Conservatory of Music classes. Part time spaces available. 2.5-5year olds. viewroyalpreschool@live.com. View Royal Preschool..............................250-479-8067 Exciting inclusive program in a safe and exceptional care environment. 3-5 year olds. Outside play and themes enrich this program. Full/part-time spaces available. viewroyalpreschool.com.

Mill Bay / Cobble Hill Cedar Montessori..................................... 250-710-9007 A beautiful rural setting where children are lovingly supported to learn at their own pace within a stimulating Montessori environment.

DUNCAN International Montessori Academy of Canada................................................. 250-737-1119 Offers an enriching environment for preschool children 2-4.9 years with potty training. Nurturing young minds, keeping the spirit free. intmontessori.ca. Parkside Academy..................................... 250-746-1711 Providing high quality early learning and care from infancy to 12 years of age, in a stimulating, respectful, nurturing, nature based environment with fully educated and passionate early childhood educators. Visit parksideacademy.ca or find us on Facebook. Queen Margaret’s School.......................... 250-746-4185 Early Childhood Education Program. Co-ed nurturing curriculum to develop the whole child. Healthy snacks and lunch provided. qms.bc.ca. Queen of Angels Early Learning Centre...... 250-701-0433 We believe that the development of the whole child (physically, socially, emotionally, cognitively, and spiritually) encourages each individual to develop to their full potential. We offer an enriched full day program for 3–5 year olds based on Kindergarten readiness. Sunrise Waldorf School Preschool..............250-743-7253 A warm, nature-based Waldorf rhythm where wonder is nurtured. Led by Waldorf trained ECE teachers. sunrisewaldorfschool.org.

Chemainus St. Joseph’s Preschool..............................250-246-3191 An enriching preschool program allowing children to grow as individuals in a safe and nurturing Christian environment.

Qualicum Beach Children’s Discovery Centre.....................250-752-4343 Our program recognizes the uniqueness of each child and provides a nurturing, safe and creative learning environment. Licensed preschool, group care and out of school care. Early Childhood Educators. childrensdiscovery centre.ca. childrensdiscoverycentre@hotmail.com. Little Star Children’s Centre.....................250-752-4554 Mother, Daughter owned and operated. Earth friendly preschool education inspired by nature. Infused with fun and creative daily yoga practices! Licensed group care. Enthusiastic ECE instructors. littlestardaycare.ca

Port Alberni John Paul II Catholic School.....................250-723-0637 “Where children grow and learn through play.” We provide a program that will inspire development physically, socially, emotionally, cognitively, creatively and spiritually.

November 2016 49

Pretend Roald Dahl L ast Christmas, Angus’s uncle James got him a Roald Dahl box set: 15 classic novels that Angus flipped through, and then quickly abandoned. There were pictures, but they were grossly outnumbered by words. Stuart Little had been unsuccessful, and I figured these would be too. But this past summer, I tried again. I grabbed Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and started to read aloud. Angus has autism, and one manifestation of this are his obsessions. His interests consume him. He spent months being mini-Raffi, unwilling to do much else but clutch his ukulele and serenade anyone he met. Before Raffi it was Dr. Seuss; he can still recite Horton Hears A Who! verbatim. Now, it is officially Roald Dahl. It isn’t just that Angus likes Roald Dahl’s books. They’re his passion. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory was such a revelation that we sped through the rest of the box set this summer and started back again at the beginning. Angus used his birthday book gift certificate from his grandparents to purchase The Roald Dahl Dictionary, a 300-page book of words from Roald Dahl’s stories—real and invented—each used in an official Roald Dahl sentence. I need to use sand timers to put a limit on my reading of this dictionary otherwise we would never leave the couch. I read, and Angus recites the sentences along with me and then tells me what book they are from. Either that, or he acts them out. And this brings me to the main manifestation of Angus’s love for Roald Dahl: his desire to become the characters, to “pretend

50 Island Parent Magazine

Roald Dahl.” I receive constant instructions about who I am: You’re Miss Honey and I’m Matilda, You’re the Queen and I’m Sophie, You’re Grandma Georgina and I’m Charlie. Sometimes I won’t play along, and tell Angus that for now he needs to be Angus, and I need to be his mom. But oftentimes I’ll humour him, at least for a while. It’s fun for him, and it can also be useful. This summer, when he wasn’t keen on learning to ride his bike, the idea of riding it around the Queen’s castle (Vic High) and slipping past the guards (dog walkers) was a thrilling adventure. When I need to fold laundry, he’s incredibly helpful—Charlie helped his mom with the same task. It’s not just me who gets conscripted. When Mike comes home from work and Angus shouts, “Hello Grandpa Joe!,” Mike doesn’t miss a beat. We’ve watched Matilda and The Witches and Fantastic Mr. Fox, and Angus’s first movie theatre experience was The BFG, but it’s Charlie and The Chocolate Factory (both versions) that Angus adores. He’s watched the YouTube special features on the making of the movies. He has the soundtracks: they’re the only CDs that get play in the car. He can discuss the differences between the two versions, and which directorial choices are better. He prefers Tim Burton’s squirrels to Mel Stuart’s Golden Geese—more in line with the book. I agree. Is it wrong to humour him? Sometimes I wonder. If he’s going to be obsessed with anything, being obsessed with a few excellent books is a pretty decent choice. But his love does cloud his judgement. He doesn’t

quite understand why a DVD of The Making of Charlie and The Chocolate Factory isn’t the perfect birthday present for a classmate, and he writes off an adult’s intelligence as if he knows more about Roald Dahl than they do [spoiler alert: he always does]. Should

Laura Trunkey Maternity & Beyond we try to shift his interests? Or should we go even further, only taking the books down for set hours, refusing to play along when he calls me Bruce Bogstrotter and Mike Augustus Gloop? We shouldn’t, I’ve decided. Reading about autism and obsessions I came across a quote from a teenager: “My mind was constantly whirring with thoughts, worries and concerns. The time spent with my obsession was the only time in which I had a clear mind—it gave me that much sought-after relaxation.” It’s true that when Angus is talking about Roald Dahl he’s happy. When we’re acting out stories with him, we’re sharing a connection that is meaningful. He’s expanding his world just enough for us to slip inside with him. If all I have to do is mime some chocolate-cake induced stomach pain to give him a reprieve from the stresses of life, I’m certainly up for the challenge.

Laura Trunkey is the mother of the amazing Angus, and the author of the story collection Double Dutch (House of Anansi, 2016). Find her at lauratrunkey.com.

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November 2016 51

Fall Nature Frolics Exploring Regional Parks

alloween just came and went, you and your family may have already visited the pumpkin patch, and fall television shows are in full swing. We are all settling in for shorter days, but before we are completely immersed with winter, we still have a few more weeks of fall nature frolicking ahead of us. There are plenty of wonderful plants and animals to discover and notice in November, especially in our regional parks. Let me share with you just some of the flora and fauna that we, as parks naturalists, often encounter, and that you may come across, too. One of my favourites to see at this time of year is the Pacific salmon that spawn in freshwater rivers and waterways, such as the Craigflower and Sooke Rivers. A salmon’s beautiful spawning colours—the purple parr marks of the Chum Salmon or the glimmering bright red of a Coho’s belly—always astound me as I see them

splash and thrash to reach their spawning grounds. Some of the ways we know of that salmon use to navigate to their home waterway are a combination of magnetic field, celestial navigation, genetic coding, temperature and smell. When spawning, a female salmon digs one to several redds (shallow “nests”) in the stream’s gravel. The female does this by turning on one side and fanning her tail to remove stones and grit. Once the redd is dug, the female releases her eggs in the nest, while alongside her one or more males fertilize the eggs. Depending on the species, a female salmon lays up to 2,500 eggs at one time. The female protects the eggs by covering them back up with gravel, often guarding the nest until she dies. Most salmon species die two to three weeks after spawning. In late fall, I also love to re-discover our coastal Douglas-fir forests. I put on my raingear and gumboots, and head out on a

trail to romp through muddy puddles and marvel at the different leaves still attached to our evergreen plants. By keeping their leaves year-round, evergreen plants live a slow and steady lifestyle, continuing to photosynthesize at a reduced rate through the winter. Douglas-fir, grand fir, western

Sara Mimick Nature Notes red cedar and other small conifer needles conserve water and nutrients, as well as provide protection to the tree from the wind and sun. Other evergreen leaves, such as those of arbutus, salal and Oregon grape, are thick and waxy to reduce water loss and to help fend off hungry insects. The opposite of evergreen plants are deciduous plants, those trees, bushes and herbs that shed leaves in early to mid-fall. In November, I have fun searching for, and counting, bird nests in deciduous tree branches, many of which were once hidden

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in the spring, but that are now delightfully revealed. Bushtit nests resemble cozy, wooly socks drooping from tree limbs, while American robin nests are easier to spot because of their larger size (six to eight inches across, three to six inches high) and the materials used, like twigs, mud and grass. If I’m lucky, I may also hear the drumming of a non-migratory pileated woodpecker or see a native red squirrel scurrying to cache conifer cones, an essential food source for them in the winter. If a person or predator gets too close to a red squirrel’s nest or stored food supply, they emit a high-pitched and ‘bark-like’ alarm call that often gets mistaken for a bird.

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So go exploring with your family on a fun fall nature frolic in a Regional Park or join a guided walk. Some upcoming CRD Regional Parks nature outings and events include Salmon Sensation at Charters Interpretive Centre in Sooke, Going Squirrelly and Wonderful Woodpeckers in Francis/ King Regional Park. To find out more visit crd.bc.ca/parks.

RBC Financial Planning is a business name used by Royal Mutual Funds Inc. (RMFI). Financial planning services and investment advice RBCprovided Financialby Planning is a business name used by Royal Mutual FundsBank Inc. of (RMFI). Financial planning services of and investment advice are RMFI. RMFI, RBC Global Asset Management Inc., Royal Canada, Royal Trust Corporation Canada and The Royal are by RMFI. RMFI, RBC Global Asset Management Inc., Royal Bank of Canada, Trust Corporation of Canada and The Royal RBCprovided Financial Planning is a business name used by Royal Mutual Funds Inc. (RMFI). Financial planning services and investment Trust Company are separate corporate entities which are affiliated. RMFI is licensed as aRoyal financial services firm in the province ofadvice Quebec. Trust Company are separate corporate entities which are affiliated. RMFI is licensed as a financial services firm in the province of Quebec. are/ provided by RMFI.ofRMFI, RBC Global Asset Management Inc., Royal Canada, Royal Trust Corporation Canada and The Royal ® ™ Trademark(s) Royal Bank of Canada. © Royal Bank of Canada, 2015. 36425 (10/2015) RBC Financial Planning is a business name used by Royal Mutual FundsBank Inc. of (RMFI). Financial planning services of and investment advice ® /™ Trademark(s) of Royal Bank of Canada. © Royal Bank of Canada, 2015. 36425 of (10/2015) Trust Company are separate corporate entities which are affiliated. RMFI is licensed as a financial services firm in the province Quebec. RBC Financial Planning is a business name used by Royal Mutual Funds Inc. (RMFI). Financial planning services and investment advice are provided by RMFI. RMFI, RBC Global Asset Management Inc., Royal Bank of Canada, Royal Trust Corporation of Canada and The Royal ® / ™ Trademark(s) of Royal Bank of Canada. © Royal Bank of Canada, 2015. 36425 (10/2015) are provided by RMFI. RMFI, RBC Global Asset Management Inc., Royal Bank of Canada, Royal Trust Corporation of Canada and The Royal Trust Company are separate corporate entities which are affiliated. RMFI is licensed as a financial services firm in the province of Quebec. Trust are separate entities© which affiliated. RMFI2015. is licensed as a financial services firm in the province Quebec. ® / ™Company Trademark(s) of Royalcorporate Bank of Canada. Royalare Bank of Canada, 36425 of (10/2015) ® / ™ Trademark(s) of Royal Bank of Canada. © Royal Bank of Canada, 2015. 36425 (10/2015)

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2758 Peatt Road, Langford 250-818-9225 or 778-265-5955 www.leapforwardlangford.com info@leapforwardlangford.com November 2016 53

Too Sorry S

ometimes as a parent, you might say or do something to your child that just doesn’t fit within your vision of healthy parenting. You might even end up apologizing to your child and that’s just great. If however, your apology is all about how badly you feel, you might want to CUT IT OUT! Kids can handle hearing this kind of thing for about one minute. Any longer than that and it ends up feeling yucky to your child. Your child shouldn’t be put in a position of forgiving you or understanding you to make you feel better. For the most part, kids are allergic to their parent’s feelings and needs when it comes to parental guilt. Why? Because it is an

54 Island Parent Magazine

adult issue. Adding to this overwhelming experience, parents often go on and on about how they were raised and how badly they want to do things differently. Yes, it makes sense, but does your child need to listen to all of this? What about them? If you apologize, do so with the intention of understanding how your behaviour impacted your child. It might sound like, “I’m feeling upset with myself for calling you a spoiled brat this morning. That was unkind and untrue. I bet you felt pretty hurt by this.” Then get curious about how this experience affected him. Listen to your child, talk about his feelings and remember you don’t have to agree with how he see things in order to do this. He may not see his own behaviour or accurately read the situation, but that’s okay. The issue that led you to lose your temper is a separate issue. If you bring this into the mix during what is meant to be a heartfelt apology, you are kyboshing your efforts. Talk about that later.

If you find yourself apologizing often about the same thing it might be an invitation to look a little deeper at your triggers. What seems to get you off track with your parenting?

Allison Rees Cut It Out! What are you reacting to? What could you do instead? What has worked before? What does your child need? What is triggering him? Parenting is intense and all families have times when they argue or say something they regret. Life is messy, relationships are messy and people are messy. Sometimes a look of apology and a heartfelt hug says it all.

LIFE Seminars has two books available, Sidestepping the Power Struggle and The Parent Child Connection. See lifeseminars.com.

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