JUST DREAM A Literary Magazine May 2022 Issue 9
y r a ers v i nn ion A d it 2n Ed
In this issue… ABOUT THE EDITIOR-IN-CHIEF
*May is Mental Health Awareness Month*
The Effects of
A B U S E
Marquita Antoineá Henderson The Vision of the the Visionary
on
MENTAL HEALTH Psychological • Physical • Cultural Financial • Substance • Sexual • Verbal
JUST DREAM Copyright © 2022 by Marquita Antoineá All rights reserved. This magazine or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a review.
In This Issue... Permanent Fixtures A Letter From the Editor - Tony Henderson 7 A Little Extra Motivation - Marquita Antoineá 9 Dream Light - Tiara J 11 A Blast from the Past - Marquita Antoineá 19 Talecia Izlar's Therapy Tips - Talecia Izlar 23 Spirituality Corner w/ Miss Benita - Benita Henderson 31 Talk to Kita Interview Series - Marquita Antoineá 41 Meet the Authors - Author Biographies 45 Support Black Business - Black-Owned Business Ads 49
Extras I Am - Tony Henderson 15 The Vision and the Visionary - Marquita Antoineá 17 Shifting the Broody Moodys - Sharon Purce 29 Sexual Abuse - Brigetta Weatherington 36 Words to Live By - Marquita Antoineá 37 The Aftermath - Marquita Antoineá 38
A Letter from the Editor his edition of JUST DREAM is extra special as it marks the two-year T anniversary since beginning this journey. Thanks to YOU, and all of our loyal readers, JUST DREAM continues to grow, furthering our mission of providing a platform for writers to share insight into some of the most important issues in the world today. This issue will focus on mental health and awareness, a topic that many people are reluctant to discuss, especially in the black community. I prefer to use the term “mental wellness” as opposed to “mental health”. Becoming aware of your mental state is a precursor of being mentally well. As I think about mental wellness it brings to my mind many questions and queries. I will focus on myself if I may. Without going into too much detail, I will say that I am fighting to stabilize my mental wellness, while simultaneously helping my wife of forty years conquer her issues. Two hearts can indeed become one as we battle with each other’s conditions. And with God’s help and our prayers and positive attitudes, we are winning each battle thus far - one day at a time, and periodically minute by minute. It is not always easy to stay positive; when I cannot breathe easily, or eat, or even speak, it can be very discouraging. But I force my thoughts and emotions to stay positive. I was elated when I was able to swallow apple juice! I saw it as progress in the right direction. God is fighting for me and working with me, because He sees that I am fighting for myself. I admit I am not mentally well, but that admission is an enormous first step in the process of getting to wellness. I affirm myself every day with these statements: I AM Amazing; I AM Miraculous; I AM Remarkable; I AM Abundant; I AM Limitless; I AM Powerful; I AM Blessed!
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A Letter from the Editor (cont.) Mental wellness is a state of mind, a conscious practice and process. It can also be a subconscious destroyer of your mind if you don’t acknowledge your mental state. You cannot pretend it doesn’t exist – you must focus on it and work to achieve mental wellness. With that being said, I invite you to turn the pages and keep reading. Thank you to all of our contributors. As always, your articles and commentary are wonderful. Fellow Dreamers, choose happy! Enjoy!
Tony Henderson
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Just because everybody needs
A Little Extra MOTIVATION Marquita Antoineá
Don’t Play the Victim Abuse is defined as any of the following: 1. To use something to bad effect or for a bad purpose; misuse. 2. To treat a person or an animal with cruelty or violence, especially regularly or repeatedly. 3. To speak in an insulting and offensive to or about someone. When it comes to being abused, in whichever manner, society will have you thinking you should victimize yourself. The problem with playing the victim is that you don’t give yourself a chance to truly heal. Playing the victim typically requires a more negative thought process, and dwelling in negativity is certainly not the way to heal. Victims of abuse should remember the following: 1. If you’re here to tell the story, you’re more then a victim; you’re a survivor! 2. It’s not your fault! Give yourself some grace. 3. You’re not alone! Don’t be afraid to tell someone. If you or someone you know has been the victim of abuse, call any of these hotline numbers: Domestic Abuse: 1(800) 799-7233 Sexual Abuse: 1(800) 656-4673 9
L O V E
I S
G R E A T E R
T H A N
hate. Merchandise coming soon.
Dream Light The
shines on
Tiara J
Founder/CEO of The Tiara J Brand Tiara Johnson, affectionately known as Tiara J, is an AwardWinning Best-Selling Author and CEO/Founder of the Tiara J Brand LLC. Her mission in life is to help the next woman win. She curates many events and women led organizes such as Women with Vision, Her Seat at The Table, and her annual women's conference Am I Ready? In 2014, she started a group called Women with Vision where she deducted time and speaking life back into women after she noticed how her generation had given up on love. Since then, she has won awards, spoken at many events, conferences, podcast, co-authored an anthology, and helped women find their purpose, voice, and their vision. In 2020, she won the D.C. Mayor's Arts Award for Visionary Leadership. Audiences, mentees, clients, and peers alike sing Tiara's praises for her capability to deliver her creative way of motivation and inspiration to others. Her speaking style gives the audience exactly the motivation necessary to go from pain to purpose. 11
Dream Light Tiara J Continued...
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Dream Light Continued...
I felt that there was a void that needed to be filled in my area and with women my race and age.
I have been in business since 2014.
It feels amazing and empowering. In the beginning you can’t see the accomplishments, sometimes you can’t see them even when you reach them. For me, the greatest reward is someone coming up to me and saying I’ve helped them get through a tough time or my words inspired them to start a business.
Go for it. What’s stopping you from creating the life you’ve envisioned for yourself? It’s time to start living the life God’s vision has for you! Interview Conducted by Marquita Antoinea
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Dream Light Continued...
Tiara J
The Tiara J Brand LLC CEO/Founder Serial Entrepreneur www.thetiarajbrand.com thetiarajbrandinfo@gmail.com Ig: @iam_tiara j, @thetiarajbrand, @crownedglamourbeauty, @thequeenstableshow
Tiara, on behalf of JUST DREAM, never stop DREAMING! Spread your wings and fly!
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I AM…
Artwork by Tony Henderson
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JUST DREAM TWO YEARS LATER
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JUST DREAM The Visionary and the Vision
Marquita Antoineá Henderson is the President and CoFounder of the Just Dream Foundation which is a nonprofit based in Prince George’s County, MD, with a mission of empowering children, teens, and young adults through the continual reinforcement of positive ideas and behaviors in every aspect of life. It is with the same mission in mind that JUST DREAM: The Literary Magazine was born. The online publication shares stories of encouragement, love, and positivity. And with readers like you, JUST DREAM is all that Marquita dreamed it would be. Marquita is a Prince George’s County raised mother-ofthree whose ultimate goal in life is to help other people find their purpose. And JUST DREAM was created to do just that. Due to some of the free time because of Covid-19, Marquita decided that starting a quarterly publication as a platform for other writers to tell their story was a good idea. Two years later, JUST DREAM has become more than just a platform for other people. It has also proven to Marquita that she can persevere, be consistent, follow through. With a lot of patience and dedication, JUST DREAM will continue to grow. 18
JUST DREAM P R E S E N T S
A Blast From the Past This section will highlight popular pieces of literature from previous issues of JUST DREAM. It is our hope that the pieces chosen will provide even greater knowledge and insight the second time around.
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A Blast From the Past
The Darkness
Written by Marquita Antoineá First published in JUST DREAM August 2020 20
In my book “The New Mind,” winter represents darkness in thought or prolonged sadness, and a time of mental cleansing making space for more positive things to blossom in the springtime. One of the pieces in this section of the book is called “Into the Darkness” and it reads: Into the darkness Because darkness is comfortable Into the darkness Because darkness is the usual Into the darkness Because darkness is real Into the darkness Because it's what I feel Unable to express what's really inside Out of fear of what others may think When what I truly feel Is like a permanent blink Some can't see clearly I choose not to see at all Careless, withdrawn, and detached My world just became so small Don't need to be watched just pray for me please Don't want to talk about it or cause a scene As always, I will be ok eventually But there's no need to come into the darkness with me In the darkness is safe for me The darkness is peace just different than yours No confusion for me in this place Because you can't see the scars and sores I'm fine right here alone in the darkness. 21
I’m at the point in my life where I realize that my “usual” won’t do... My usual negative disposition that always leaves me blue I have come to the realization that the comfort I once found in darkness Was nothing more than a mental block to protect my heart from the pain I would inevitability experience on the way to the light I have learned to openly express myself regardless of what those around me might say, think, or feel. I have allowed myself to heal and no matter what I’m gonna be real, with myself. The choice I made to be blinded by negativity and pain Was exactly what was keeping me stuck out in the rain If I never choose to address the hurt I would never be able to truly enjoy the sunshine Been living in the comfort of my own darkness The tunnel has been dreary and long Time to step out of my comfort zone and into the light It’s time to sing a new song, A song of hope. Of course my days won’t always be perfect But my mood will no longer be dictated by circumstances I will keep my eyes open letting the light inside I will open up my heart and take more chances I will come out of the darkness and enjoy the ride. I’m ready for the light. 22
Talecia Izlar's Therapy Tips
Tools for everyday Mental Wellness 23
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Remember, no matter how beautiful something is on the outside, it can be poisonous on the inside - just like this oleander plant. 28
Shifting the Broody Moodys Written By: Sharon Purce How do I abuse me? Let me count the ways. I hammer me with my senses Leading my sixth sense into a maze. I implore My God to relieve me Of the worries and the craze. Yet, I contradict the pleadings Teaming yesteryears up with todays. I think that I’m remembering, But, really, I’m re-living. I’m reinforcing the pain That I swore someone else was giving. My bruised self-worth scabbed its own self With others’ misguided esteem. I stored up their views like saving-grace wealth Tucked them safely in my “This’ll work” dream. Their perfected modes of discipline Cemented as an in-grained-in-me-norm Tried and true gospel-like doctrines Had me chillin’ in a coffin-like form. The incognito of abuse’s disguises Make it crazy-hard to trace.
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For every day, just like me, Abuse dawns a different face. An off-spirited smile, a veiled third eye A chiding voice, with nagging deceit, Subtly suggesting lie after lie Implying lack from head to feet Eating or drinking my shame, guilt and fear As if medicine for my diseased soul, Broken tools in my fool-box for gear Promising to seal that unfilled hole I harass myself with sadness Instead of accepting what was IS. I try to rewrite reality’s mess With success manifesting in tears. I nag at my peace with varying discord Not knowing misery’s the plan. Premeditated piss-offs climb on board To undo the calm that’s at hand. Revelation: I’ve survived way too many ages To let others still be the blame. When pointing out my abusive stages For healing, I MUST list ME by name. For the abuse is, by far, dead and stinking Those weapons have been dulled by the grave. T’is I who resurrects stinking thinking As if it’s the discord I want to save. Knowing today I have a choice, I choose acceptance and release I daily re-define my harvest And make most everything be about peace! 30
Spirituality Corner
Benita Henderson Spiritual Enlightenment for the Everyday Human 31
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An inaudible plea Don't shrink me To your desires Mentally preparing And daring Not to set him off Silent but interactive Enter Act Like you're not here You're not clear But show no fear Peer Into the future Separated from And within It's overrated And again I am violated
Sexual Abuse A Poem
Written By Brigetta Weatherington
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Words to Live By LOVE is always greater than hate.
Don’t expect yourself from other people.
Slow progress is still progress. PUSH THRU! Happiness is subjective. Find what makes YOU happy.
Never compare yourself to others. They are not on your path.
Positivity is contagious. Spread it!
Words have POWER!
Everything happens for a reason.
Don’t be afraid to ask for help.
BE YOU! …and don’t apologize.
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Sexual Abuse
The Aftermath Written By: Marquita Antoineá 38
Take a moment to imagine yourself as a young, intelligent but beautifully naive female college freshman away from home for the first time. Imagine having that first taste of freedom and wanting nothing more than to fit in. Imagine being invited to a huge party near campus that everyone was talking about. Imagine taking your time to pick the perfect outfit and to fix your hair in the perfect style. Imagine getting to the party and having a great time. Imagine the perfect night. Can you imagine it? Good. Now imagine that perfect night being turned into an ugly nightmare all of a sudden. Imagine saying no and not being taken seriously. Imagine trying to push and fight and kick and scream, but then being overpowered by someone twice your size. Imagine no one coming to your rescue. Imagine being told to walk home in a not-so-nice neighborhood at around 2:30a.m. Imagine the most horrible night. Can you imagine it? Terrible right? Imagine waking up the next morning and being afraid to tell anyone. Imagine feeling so insignificant in comparison to that nogood “big man on campus” that you think no one would even believe you. Imagine dealing with all the shame and then blaming yourself for someone else’s senseless act of abuse. Imagine the most emotionally hurtful thoughts. Can you imagine it? It’s time to heal. 39
It happens all too often. Statistically, one in five women will be sexually abused on some level at some point in their lives. One. In. Five. Let that sink in. The worst part of it all is that there is no blueprint for how to heal from something like this. The aftermath will be different for each individual. Two common, yet not all-inclusive, responses to such a traumatic event are: 1. To become completely withdrawn and afraid to let anyone touch them; or 2. To lose any sense of self-respect and become overly promiscuous. I, unfortunately, had a little of both of these responses. I was afraid to talk to anyone about what had happened out of nothing other than shame and embarrassment, but, at the same time, I lost all respect for myself - physically, mentally, and emotionally. For so long, I felt worthless. For years, I have suffered with depression, even trying at one point to end it all. And for so long, I tried to ignore the real root of my on-again-off-again emotional turmoil. This was nearly 20 years ago, and I have just now begun feeling comfortable enough to tell this part of my story. (Notice I said “this part of my story” because it’s a minuscule piece of my story.) Take note. My story is far from over. And because I have stopped hiding my truth, I am now better equipped to deal with things more openly as they happen rather than holding it in and causing myself so much pain. The moral of the story is that there is healing in revealing your truth. Don’t hold it in! Chances are that telling your story will not only help you, but, help others as well.
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My super power is empathy. Although it causes me pain at times, I wouldn’t have it any other way. -Marquita Antoineá
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What’s Your Other Super Power? li t y i b ya m is n e r e m p o w er w o n y! r e p ti th u s o s e h My ir d us e p h to st d r a to w
My super powers are determination, consistency, and faith in God.
My superpower is kindness and my ability to make others feel comfortable and at ease when in my presence.
My
su p e co m r po w er pas s io s ar e n nu r t u a t e a b e in g r in nd g.
is r e w o p r e p su y. t y i c M a ten
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th g n re t s . is p r u e w ve o a p g r er e p v u e s yn l l My a r l it e
What’s Your Other Super Power??
,
en c M y s ch e o u ra u p er pow g in r is h g er in g , up th e o th l if t is yh in g ave ers my , an fo r wh lan d the il e ea ma p s ste r in p r e c i t a y in g if t s g in gw a ti n h at g g iv G o an d en dh me as .
My super powers are hiding deep within my spirit-ears. They are disguised as regular ears yet the piercings allow the writings on the walls and the words between the lines to seep in and transform into revelations! My spiritears listen quite well. 44
A e u h t t h t ors e e M
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Talecia Izlar is a Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor who is trauma informed, and is experienced working with clients to process and heal from trauma. She also has experience working with clients that present with anxiety, depression, ADHD, behavioral issues, relationship conflict, stress and anger management, self-esteem issues, mood stability, and psychotic disorders. Talecia's goal for her clients is to guide them towards Hope, Happiness, and Healing through self-exploration, analyzing thoughts and beliefs, and making positive behavioral changes. Talecia is a Rehabilitation Specialist for a Psychiatric Rehabilitation Program, supervising Direct Care Staff. She is also a therapist at both a mental health clinic and for her very own private practice - Guided Journeys, LLC, in Lanham, MD.
Benita Henderson, a “closet writer" for years, has devoted her life to her family. She is a proud wife, mother of four, and grandmother of ten. She has always believed that following your dreams is of the utmost importance, and she proved this when she received her Bachelor's Degree in Business Administration at the age of 50. Her newest feat - becoming a published author - has given her a newfound hope that she will be able to continue her mission of expressing her love for God through her writing. She considers herself to be an encourager to all. There is a silver lining behind every cloud. Aside from the importance of family and education, Benita also values honesty, love, peace, spirituality, and friendship. To know her is to love her. In her book "From the Depths of My Soul," Benita allows readers to take a glimpse into her life by sharing some of her innermost thoughts in journal-style snippets each complete with vulnerability and humility. Benita is sure to be a promising author as she succeeds at whatever she puts her mind to.
Marquita Antoineá was born and raised in Prince George’s County, MD. She is a single mother of three beautiful children and a two-time published author. For the majority of her life, Marquita has enjoyed helping other people in whatever way she can. Alongside her brother, in 2012, she co-founded The Just Dream Foundation, Ltd., a non-profit organization dedicated to empowering children, teens, and young adults through mentoring and tutoring. Marquita has big dreams of owning her own literary agency one day where individuals will be able to learn creative writing skills and enhance story-telling capabilities. She has hopes of creating a platform for people everywhere to share their stories of strength and perseverance. Writing has always been a hobby for Marquita, but now she realizes that her writing is therapeutic and healing for both her and those around her. With this in mind, Marquita plans to continue writing for as long as she can.
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