JUST DREAM Copyright © 2022 by Marquita Antoineá All rights reserved. This magazine or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a review.
In This Issue... Permanent Fixtures A Letter From the Editor - Tony Henderson 7 A Little Extra Motivation - Marquita Antoineá 8 A Blast from the Past - Marquita Antoineá 14 Talecia Izlar's Therapy Tips - Talecia Izlar 17 Spirituality Corner w/ Miss Benita - Benita Henderson 22 Meet the Authors - Author Biographies 34 Support Black Business - Black-Owned Business Ads 38
Extras Breaking the Curse - Marquita Antoineá 27 2022 in Four Simple Words - Marquita Antoineá 31
A Letter from the Editor ello fellow Dreamers! Welcome Back! In this issue, we are Breaking H Generational Curses in black history. I am so excited to celebrate another Black History month. And during this month of celebrating, we are often reminded about our enslaved ancestors who were forced onto ships and brought across the ocean from Africa. The last “slave ship” that came to America was the Clotilda, which arrived in July 1860. Congress had banned the importation of slaves in 1807, so this last trip was an illegal one. So, the ship was burned and buried in the sea, to hide the evidence of its existence. e chose not to honor our generational curses, and we educated W ourselves and each other. We became doctors, surgeons, educators, psychologists, engineers, pilots, and more. Some of our first Black Americans who earned these advanced skills were Hiram Revels, the first Black U. S. Senator, Lucy Stanton, was the first Black graduate from an Ivy League College (1850), Rebecca Lee Crumpler was the first Black woman to receive an M. D. degree (1864). The first Black combat pilot was Eugene Bullard (1917), and the first Black generals in the military were Benjamin O. Davis (1940) and Hazel W. Johnson (1979). here are many other “firsts” in Black/African American history, but these T are examples of people who chose not to be deterred by the cultural restrictions of their times. As you read this “first issue” of this year, imagine yourself as being possibly the first in your generation to reach an amazing goal you have dreamed or thought about. This world is in your hands. Take full advantage of it. Happy Dreaming!
Tony Henderson
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Just because everybody needs
A Little Extra MOTIVATION Marquita Antoineá
The Eradication of H.A.T.E. If I had to identify the one thing I’d like to see eradicated most in this crazy world, it would undoubtedly be H.A.T.E. (Hurt, Anger, Threat, Exclusion). For real change to occur, we all must consciously choose L.O.V.E. (Laughter, Oneness, Value, Excellence) instead of H.A.T.E. Every. Single. Time. The mere concept of hatred is simply disgusting, if I may say so. Hatred does absolutely nothing but bring extremely negative energy into a world already in chaos and turmoil. Those who choose H.A.T.E., both knowingly and unknowingly, typically hurt people that make them angry or people they see as a threat, hoping to exclude them from success or true happiness. Those people will subsequently place limits upon their own success spending unnecessary energy on the wrong things. But by choosing L.O.V.E., we help to bridge the gap making our differences seem much smaller. Love is so rewarding. Love breeds peace, forgiveness, and unity. Love unconsciously rights many wrongs. Love is the greatest value. Love is excellence. Be excellent. Choose L.O.V.E. Every. Single. Time. 8
L O V E I S
G R E A T E R
T H A N
hate. Merchandise coming soon.
The
Dream Light shines on
Crystal Brooks
Founder/CEO of Love You More, Inc. Crystal Brooks is a woman committed to helping other women. She has embraced her journey to self0love and wants to guide other women along the way. While she is a survivor sexual, physical, and mental abuse, she didn't let that define her life. Crystal persevered and found a life of peace and abundance with her husband and three children. The mission of Love You More, Inc. is to promote women's empowerment within the community with a focus on Self Development, overcoming adversity, and identifying areas of motivation. With this, they are able to Evolve.Empower.Love.
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Dream Light Continued...
I started Love You More, Inc.® to help nurture women as they become resilient, empowered, and loving individuals. I wanted to show women how to choose themselves when no one else does and provide a network of support. Most importantly, I wanted women to learn that no matter the battle, choosing to love yourself is always a step in the right direction. Your past does not define you, but it does propel you into all that God has for you. I honestly wish I had something like Love You More when I was going through. It would have helped me so much during my hardest times. March 16 will make 6 years since I founded Love You More, Inc.®. Funny thing is that I was told we wouldn’t make it past 6 months to a year. And look at us! Here we are 6 years later.
It feels amazing honestly. I’m doing something that God ordained. That makes all the difference in the world. Is it easy? No, but it’s all worth it to help others.
Interview Conducted by Marquita Antoinea
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Dream Light Continued...
Crystal Brooks
Love You More, Inc.® CEO/Founder www.loveyoumoreinc.com crystal@loveyoumoreinc.com 240-460-1087 @loveyoumoreinc
Crystal, on behalf of JUST DREAM, never stop DREAMING! Spread your wings and fly!
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JUST DREAM P R E S E N T S
A Blast From the Past This section will highlight popular pieces of literature from previous issues of JUST DREAM. It is our hope that the pieces chosen will provide even greater knowledge and insight the second time around.
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A Blast From the Past
My Letter to America Written by Marquita Antoineá
First published in JUST DREAM February 2021
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Dear America, I love the skin I’m in. Your hatred will never deter me from making it to my destination. In fact, your hatred will propel me further and faster along my path to greatness. Your hatred will serve as pure motivation. You may think that the fact that I was born with melanin AND two X-chromosomes, that I already have “two strikes” against me. But those “two strikes” are nothing but ammunition for my journey. It may take me twice as long to get half as far as my white counterparts, but trust and believe when I get to where I’m going, America better watch out. You may see my skin color as a weakness, when in reality my skin color represents strength. You may see my skin color as a threat, but that sounds like a personal problem to me. My skin represents my ability to overcome, my ability to persevere, my ability to succeed in spite of it all. My skin color represents beauty and power. My skin color represents everything you aspire to be, America. Stop being jealous and fearful of my skin color. You may as well embrace all that comes with this skin color because my silence is over. OUR SILENCE IS OVER! America, you have officially screwed yourselves this time. Just look at the unity during the protests in all 50 states. Look at the people in power of all different races who are screaming BLACK LIVES MATTER. Look at the children speaking up to their parents about how wrong it is to hate. Listen to the power of the voices joined in unity. It’s one enormous choir all singing the same song - BLACK LIVES MATTER!!! America, get out of your own way. We want peace, unity, and EQUALITY, and the only thing standing between US and the U.S. is you, America. MOVE! CHANGE! GET YOUR CRAP TOGETHER! Let me raise my children in peace, love, and unity instead of chaos, hatred, and separation. Let my children have a chance to succeed at the same rate as their white counterparts. Let my family and friends be proud to be BLACK, instead of being afraid of their BLACKNESS. Our blackness is what makes us amazing. America, you should know this by now! We are literally the backbone of this country. So, again I say, GET YOUR CRAP TOGETHER, AMERICA! I love the skin I’m in, and it’s time you do too! Signed, Marquita Antoineá A tired, angry, black mother.
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Talecia Izlar's Therapy Tips
Tools for everyday Mental Wellness 17
& The Impact of Mental Health in Minorities As a therapist of color who primarily serves the minority population, racism and discrimination are frequently discussed during sessions and are identified and processed as trauma experiences. Oftentimes, it may be experiences at work or even in social settings, where they report feelings of frustration, disappointment and sometimes, downright, anger. The question that arises is how the culmination of microaggressions, macroaggressions, and perceived racist and discriminatory experiences can impact individuals of color long-term. Individuals may have identified feelings of anxiety due to fears of re-experiencing the trauma. When individuals are in environments they perceive as potentially threatening, they may feel tense, on edge, and worried. They also can feel physical symptoms when they are in social or professional environments in fear of experiencing racism or discrimination. An individual can even feel anxiety when a situation is safe due to past experiences personally and professionally. The long-term impact can involve an anxious 18
& The Impact of Mental Health in Minorities trigger response in personal and professional situations. “Why is my stomach hurting at this job interview? “ “Why do I feel on edge whenever I go to this particular restaurant?” “When I am in environments where I am the only person of color, why do I worry about how I am perceived?” Individuals can become increasingly guarded, wanting to avoid individuals and situationswhere the trauma could occur. Individuals can even restrict their socialization due to fear of re-experiencing trauma. Due to being guarded, individuals can miss opportunities for connection or personal and professional growth. “I don’t want to apply for that job because I know who they will end up picking”. “I will pass on going to that function because I don’t want to be the only person of color.” “I already know that someone here is going to say something offensive so let me stay in my corner”. Individuals may also feel hopeless, feeling a loss of control in the way they are perceived and treated. Individuals could feel that no matter how they conduct themselves, they will still be mistreated or overlooked. “Why apply for a job where I
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& The Impact of Mental Health in Minorities believe they may show favor to the majority culture?” “Why should I even try to present in a certain way when I will be perceived in a negative way?” Anger, which is a secondary emotion to hurt and pain, also has been a predominating feeling that results from racism. Individuals may build anger and resentment from not being able to fight their aggressor or the system. It can feel like being bullied over time, overlooked, and taken advantage of. The long-term effects can affect your mood and ability to move through life peacefully and with a healthy view and behaviors. In order to combat the long-term effects, it is recommended that minorities identify and normalize these feelings. Also, it is critical to process these emotions and feelings with natural supports and professionals in order to heal. If you have questions about this article or want to reach the author, please contact guidedjourneysllc@gmail.com 20
Remember, no matter how beautiful something is on the outside, it can be poisonous on the inside - just like this oleander plant. 21
Spirituality Corner
Benita Henderson Spiritual Enlightenment for the Everyday Human 22
Break the Curse Find FREEDOM! The Bible includes evidence of curses and proof that generational curses are in effect today. Although the curses in the Bible are different from the mainstream understanding of curses today. “The Lord passed in front of him and proclaimed: “ And he passed in front of Moses, proclaiming, “The Lord, the Lord, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness, maintaining love to thousands, and forgiving wickedness, rebellion, and sin. Yet he does not leave the guilty unpunished; he punishes the children and their children for the sin of the parents to the third and fourth generation.” (Exodus 34:6-7 NIV) This verse shows that the actions of someone did affect their offspring. God delivered the curse, not the person. The curse was punishment for sin. Thus, a generational curse is a punishment for sin that continues through the generations. However, God’s treatment of sin in the Old Testament is not identical to His treatment of sin in the New Testament. Before the arrival of Jesus, God treated people as a community rather than just as an individual. With the love and forgiveness that Jesus brought, punishment occurred on a more individual basis (John 9:1-3).
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Adam and Eve committed the “original sin” when they ate the fruit from the tree of knowledge of good and evil. Their first sin created “conditions” that all men would have to live by for all generations. The conditions included: humanity is now forced to labor, women encounter labor pains from pregnancy, and all humankind will return to dust (Genesis 3:14-19). Despite the unfortunate separation from God leading to a permanent life outside of the garden, there is a redemption that God offers through Jesus. Thus, while there is a generational curse, there is also a generational blessing. “So then, as through one trespass there is condemnation for everyone, so also through one righteous act there is justification leading to life for everyone.” (Romans 5:18 NIV) Understanding generational curses from this biblical perspective will help us to understand how our sin creates conditions for people in our lives, and how their sin creates conditions for us. Naturally, children inherit qualities from their parents, whether spiritual, emotional, or physical. This is natural human biology by God’s design. While sin is also passed down, the effects do not have to be permanent. Christ makes change possible. “Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is very powerful in its effect.” (James 5:16 NIV) God seeks to hear from us and heal us from all the troubles we encounter in life. Though He allows suffering for our transgressions, God is always willing and present to help us through our afflictions, including our generational problems. The Bible shows that prayer works and is vital for the Christian lifestyle. 24
Individual Change “No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation,he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.” (1 Corinthians 10:13) The Bible offers direction for self-improvement. When we change ourselves to reflect Christ, we can begin to model Christ-like behavior for strangers, but also those closest to us. Generational curses are not erased by continuing the same problems, but rather by doing something different, that causes positive change. “Do not be conformed to this age, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may discern what is the good, pleasing, and perfect will of God.” (Romans 12:2 NIV) Once you begin to recognize the grasp of sin in your life or that of multiple loved ones, change becomes possible. However, change begins on an individual level before affecting others. God is after our hearts and seeks to renew our minds. By making ourselves better people, we help God expand His influence over not just our lives but also the lives of all those around us. “What began as a generational sin can be converted into a generational blessing.” (Proverbs 27:17). That change begins with us, the individual.
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I , like many others in my generation, come from a long line of young and/or single (unwed) mothers. My maternal grandmother had my mom unmarried at 20 years old. My mother had my older sister unmarried at 16. Then, as if I hadn’t heard and seen the struggles brought on by the decision to become a mother, I had my first child unmarried at 19. I heard about struggles related to trying to develop a career along with all the responsibilities that come with raising children alone. Mostly, I heard of the struggles surrounding being a baby having a baby. Yet and still, I made a choice to bring a life into this world. All the struggles I had heard about quickly became my reality. Really quickly.
But there is one main reason why I feel like this generational curse still stands. The struggle in the stories did not match the triumph that I saw daily. I saw hard work and endless amounts of love. So, why would I believe the struggle that I had only heard about instead of the mastery, the ease that I saw in real life? I’m glad you asked. Unfortunately, the strength and independence of women today (more specifically, single moms) has created a false perception of ease of parenthood. The will, the determination, and the drive to get shit done (by any means necessary) somehow masks the 28
difficulty of parenting. As a result of this misconception, single motherhood is being glorified. Well, this is not the way it was intended. From the beginning, it was meant for children to come into this world with two PRESENT and ACTIVE parents who loved them equally and dedicated equal time and energy to that child.
weakness. Well, I beg to differ. My children see me cry often. It is sure as hell not to show them my weakness. Rather, it is to show that I am human and that I don't have it all figured out. So when something unfavorable happens, they won't be so shocked.
Superwomen do exist but in my experience the real I would bet my last dollar that superwomen are old. LOL. The real superwomen are if more women would show experienced. The real their children their superwomen have had time weaknesses and to get their shit together. shortcomings, young ladies Don't get me wrong. I'm on would think twice about my way to being super. But bringing children into this I'm woman enough to admit world without first building a that I'm not there yet. solid foundation. I often hear women say that they don't let To all teens/young adults out their children see them cry there, stop rushing to because it's a sign of become mothers. Stop 29
rushing to be "super." Instead, take time to plant a seed in fertilized soil. Then build a solid foundation around the seed. Then join forces with the man that was intended for you. Then and only then should you decide to bring a child into this world. We have to break the generational curse and bring greatness back. Babies raising babies alone sure as hell ain't the way to get there. Don't know who this was for but it was on my heart so I thought I would share. Feel free to pass along and excuse the language. It's just the passion in me.
I choose blessing!
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C B RE A K T H O U G H E P A U T R I P C O N N E C T I ON S N E in four simple words
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Recently, I came across this picture on social media with the instructions to select the first four words you see. So, I decided to give it a try. The first four words I saw were CONNECTION, CREATION, BREAKTHROUGH, and PURPOSE. Unsurprisingly, I could instantly see the pattern. I knew exactly what it meant for my life this year. So here it goes:
“In 2022, I will make more meaningful connections and new innovative creations, so I can be ready for my breakthrough and live in my purpose.”
A e u h t t h t ors e e M
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Talecia Izlar is a Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor who is trauma informed, and is experienced working with clients to process and heal from trauma. She also has experience working with clients that present with anxiety, depression, ADHD, behavioral issues, relationship conflict, stress and anger management, self-esteem issues, mood stability, and psychotic disorders. Talecia's goal for her clients is to guide them towards Hope, Happiness, and Healing through self-exploration, analyzing thoughts and beliefs, and making positive behavioral changes. Talecia is a Rehabilitation Specialist for a Psychiatric Rehabilitation Program, supervising Direct Care Staff. She is also a therapist at both a mental health clinic and for her very own private practice - Guided Journeys, LLC, in Lanham, MD.
Benita Henderson, a “closet writer" for years, has devoted her life to her family. She is a proud wife, mother of four, and grandmother of ten. She has always believed that following your dreams is of the utmost importance, and she proved this when she received her Bachelor's Degree in Business Administration at the age of 50. Her newest feat - becoming a published author - has given her a newfound hope that she will be able to continue her mission of expressing her love for God through her writing. She considers herself to be an encourager to all. There is a silver lining behind every cloud. Aside from the importance of family and education, Benita also values honesty, love, peace, spirituality, and friendship. To know her is to love her. In her book "From the Depths of My Soul," Benita allows readers to take a glimpse into her life by sharing some of her innermost thoughts in journal-style snippets each complete with vulnerability and humility. Benita is sure to be a promising author as she succeeds at whatever she puts her mind to.
Marquita Antoineá was born and raised in Prince George’s County, MD. She is a single mother of three beautiful children and a two-time published author. For the majority of her life, Marquita has enjoyed helping other people in whatever way she can. Alongside her brother, in 2012, she co-founded The Just Dream Foundation, Ltd., a non-profit organization dedicated to empowering children, teens, and young adults through mentoring and tutoring. Marquita has big dreams of owning her own literary agency one day where individuals will be able to learn creative writing skills and enhance story-telling capabilities. She has hopes of creating a platform for people everywhere to share their stories of strength and perseverance. Writing has always been a hobby for Marquita, but now she realizes that her writing is therapeutic and healing for both her and those around her. With this in mind, Marquita plans to continue writing for as long as she can.
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