JUST DREAM A Literary Magazine August 2022 Issue 10
Dear Younger Me
The Importance of Self-Reflection
JUST DREAM Copyright © 2022 by Marquita Antoineá All rights reserved. This magazine or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a review.
In This Issue... Permanent Fixtures A Letter From the Editor - Marquita Antoineá 7 A Little Extra Motivation - Marquita Antoineá 9 A Blast from the Past - Marquita Antoineá 15 Talk to Kita Interview Series - Marquita Antoineá 32 Support Black Business - Black-Owned Business Ads 36
Extras Words to Live By - Marquita Antoineá 28 My Biggest Full Circle Moment - Marquita Antoineá 29
A Letter from the Editor Hello fellow dreamers! Welcome back to the dream. This 10th issue of JUST DREAM will focus on introspection - the thorough observation of one's own mental and emotional processes - and self-reflection - serious thought about one's character, actions, and motives. By examining both the typical mental processes and the character, one can experience exponential growth personally, professionally, and spiritually. As I contemplate my own growth, I can’t help but to feel a sense of pride and admiration. At many earlier points in my life, personal experiences have caused me to question the strength of my character, the unavoidable benevolence in my heart, and the my innate ability to persevere. The things that I have been through personally would likely break countless others. However, you know how the saying goes, “what don’t kill you only makes you stronger,” is an authentic reflection of how I am living and thriving. With all this in mind, I have adopted a new motto: “But did you die?” This means so much more to me than simply the four words. Of course, you didn’t die (or I didn’t die for that matter) because you are reading this note. But today, I challenge you to do more than just live. I challenge you to look deep within and recognize your strength and persevere. Understand that life will inevitably place obstacles in your pathway but it is completely up to you to overcome and LIVE in the understanding and appreciation of who you are in this moment. Thanks again to all my loyal dreamers. I sincerely hope you enjoy this issue. Happy reading!
Marquita Antoineá 7
Just because everybody needs
A Little Extra MOTIVATION Marquita Antoineá
As I Am, But Better Growing up, I always had trouble with acceptance. I had trouble with feeling accepted by others, but more importantly, I had trouble accepting myself. Now that I am older and wiser, I realize that this problem reflects my lack of self-confidence. Self-confidence is so essential to a life free of fear, which is how I am trying to live. Even further, having a lack of selfconfidence demonstrates a lack of faith. Don't see the connection? Let me show you. God has created each one of us perfectly and wonderfully. We are to trust that God does not make mistakes. When you question yourself or second guess yourself (your abilities, your physical appearance, your mental capacity, your physical strength, etc.), you are indirectly questioning God. If we truly have faith in God the Almighty, we will wholeheartedly believe that He has already equipped us with everything that we need to succeed in every aspect of our lives. We will not feel inadequate in any way and will therefore have extreme confidence in ourselves AND in our circumstances. Now, let's not confuse self-confidence with conceit because being conceited or vain is a sin (but that's a topic for another day). We must be confident enough that we completely trust God's plan for our lives, and that includes the positive, the negative and everything in between. So, while I am lacking right now in self-confidence, I know deep down that God has already paved the way and that HE MAKES NO MISTAKES. I will choose to believe that I am perfect in His eyes. I will no longer allow confidence to be a deterrent that hinders me from shooting for the stars in my life. Instead, I will hold my head up high, grab the bull by the horns, and follow the path that God has laid for me without reservation. In other words, I will be the “me” that God has called me to be, but BETTER with respect to the way I choose to live my life. My prayer today is that I will become more confident in myself through strengthening my walk with God. I pray that my faith in Him will be reflected in my thoughts and my actions, and that others will be able to see Him through me. Amen.
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hate. Merchandise coming soon.
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JUST DREAM TWO YEARS LATER
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JUST DREAM The Visionary and the Vision
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Marquita Antoineá Henderson is the President and CoFounder of the Just Dream Foundation which is a nonprofit based in Prince George’s County, MD, with a mission of empowering children, teens, and young adults through the continual reinforcement of positive ideas and behaviors in every aspect of life. It is with the same mission in mind that JUST DREAM: The Literary Magazine was born. The online publication shares stories of encouragement, love, and positivity. And with readers like you, JUST DREAM is all that Marquita dreamed it would be. Marquita is a Prince George’s County raised mother-ofthree whose ultimate goal in life is to help other people find their purpose. And JUST DREAM was created to do just that. Due to some of the free time because of Covid-19, Marquita decided that starting a quarterly publication as a platform for other writers to tell their story was a good idea. Two years later, JUST DREAM has become more than just a platform for other people. It has also proven to Marquita that she can persevere, be consistent, follow through. With a lot of patience and dedication, JUST DREAM will continue to grow. 14
JUST DREAM P R E S E N T S
A Blast From the Past This section will highlight popular pieces of literature from previous issues of JUST DREAM. It is our hope that the pieces chosen will provide even greater knowledge and insight the second time around.
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A Blast From the Past
Bring on the Rain
Written by Marquita Antoineá First published in THE NEW MIND Copyright 2016
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In my book “The New Mind,” spring represents finding inspiration and motivation to move forward. One of the pieces in this section of the book is called “Bring on the Rain” and it reads: In life there are many times when I feel overwhelmed or like I'm drowning in all my responsibilities. But I find peace in the fact that this unrest is simply preparing me for what God has in store for me in the future. In other words, I have to practice patience and wait for the storm to run its course. The rain will end when God says so and the sun will come out shining brighter than ever before. But for now, I'm asking God to bring on the rain! The rain is watering the seed (heart) that has been planted within me. The rain is strengthening me from my roots (soul) so that once the plant grows and the flowers bloom, I will be the sturdiest plant with the most beautiful flowers anyone has ever seen. Without rain there is no growth, and without growth there is complacency. I refuse to become complacent by settling for anything less than what God has promised me. I am not ordinary, so I will not settle for an ordinary life. I'm saying all this to say that the day you became a Christian, a seed was planted inside of Hyou that will help your life to flourish. You must go through many trials and tribulations in order for that seed to grow, blossom, and become strong. Once growth begins, more rain will come to further promote the growth. And the resulting "plant" will be so strong that it will go through the subsequent storms without wavering! Go outside in the rain (weather the storm) with no umbrella (reservations) and let God water the seed inside of you. Ask God to BRING ON THE RAIN!!! Inspired by my aunt Patrice Anderson 17
"Never let life experiences change your smile." -Marquita Antoineá
Remember, no matter how beautiful something is on the outside, it can be poisonous on the inside - just like this oleander plant. 19
The Importance of
Self-Reflection 21
Self-reflection is meditation or serious thought about one's character, actions, and motives. The overall concept of self-reflection is essential to mental and emotional healing. When we go through things in life, we have the opportunity to learn more about ourselves - how we react in certain situations, how we interact with others, etc. It is important to reflect on one’s past so that the future can be filled with more wisdom and light. We must use lessons we have learned before to guide us on a new path to a better “us.” Self-reflection is also important because it helps us to take a deeper look at our role in different situations in our lives. Even when someone else hurts you, chances are you will learn something new about yourself in the midst of the pain. For example, in failed relationships of my past, I have been able to learn the following three things about myself: 1. I am an empathetic nurturer to a fault. I am working on this by setting better boundaries and constantly reminding myself that everyone’s problem is not my problem. 2. I must speak up for myself more and let people know when they did something to hurt me in that moment, instead of holding it in until I explode. I am working on this by writing my thoughts down immediately and then respectfully addressing the person once I calm down. 3. I need to pay closer attention to red flags displayed at the beginning of relationships. It would definitely save me a lot of time and heartbreak. I am working on this issue by letting potential suitors know upfront what I will and won’t stand for. Of course, relationships are just one aspect of life. However, realizing my flaws and taking action to correct them is something that will translate to every area of my life. As always, I’m looking forward to more self-reflection and the personal growth that will inevitably occur. Following are a few letters written by fellow Dreamers emphasizing some of their own moments of self-reflection.
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Dear Benita, There are so many things I wish that you had learned much sooner in life. While I find it impossible to tell you all of them at once, I will do my best to touch on a few things which would have helped you tremendously as you grew. You are going to experience some amazing things. Humble yourself or the universe will do it for you. The world is much bigger than you, and it doesn’t revolve around you. You are uniquely and wonderfully made. Always be yourself. Don’t conform to what others think you should be, embrace yourself. Don’t let other people rent space in your head for free. That’s valuable real estate. What other people think of you is none of your business. Be you and let go. It’s okay to be sensitive. I know mom says that it’s your worst trait, but I think it makes you strong. It can be difficult to be gentle with yourself, especially when no one ever shows you what love is supposed to look like. You’re either too sensitive or too hardened. It can feel like nothing comes easy, but I want to remind you that the world needs you. It takes strength to be soft in a world that seems like it’s out to get you. Things will change. You will change, but never lose your sensitivity. Not everyone in the world can sympathize with others the way you can. I hope that you find comfort in knowing that it’s your softness that makes the world a little better. A little easier. Hold on to your softness but know when to let it go. You can’t save everyone. Trying to be a life jacket for everyone 23
to hold onto can be admirable but know your limits. I know it feels like your responsibility, but there is no need for you to rest the weight of the world your shoulders. Learn to push your own buttons. Inspire yourself. Everyone else is busy. It’s wonderful and convenient when others inspire you but there will be droughts between the supply and demand. Subsidizing with a self-sufficient supply of inspiration serves as your safety net. This is how to make inspiration sustainable and scalable. Your strongest source of inspiration is nature — being outdoors. It is okay to have fun. You have been taught to be independent, and with independence comes maturity. You were never allowed to be a child in all the ways you wanted. You were not allowed to ask questions. You could not use your imagination to take you away. You could not even feel loved and nurtured by your own parents. From a very young age you were more mature than most. Feel proud of yourself for being able to be self-sufficient in ways other people your age are no longer able to be. You are always taking care of something or someone else; you forgot to take care of yourself. Please remember to have fun. Dance in the kitchen while you’re making dinner. Meet your friends outside at odd hours in the night when time seems to halt, and new beginnings seem possible. Pretend the floor is lava and jump around on the furniture until your legs are sore and your stomach hurts from laughing. Just have fun. It is important to remember to live. Don’t think about how terrible life can be sometimes, just remind yourself of what 24
it means to be alive. Pretending that you’re an adult is tiring and boring. There’s no need to grow up so fast. Learn to appreciate the time you have right now. In a lot of ways, you deserve better than you got, but hold on to the good things. Spend unlimited amounts of time outdoors and never getting tired. Hold on to those moments. Soak them up. It will make the hard days easier and the good days last longer. Stop looking toward the next thing and take the time to enjoy the present. We are taught that we are only as good as what we produce. I want something more for you though. I want you to know that your worth is not defined by how much money your parents don’t have or the fact that somedays you simply don’t have it in you to go to school. It’s okay to slow down. One day, you’re going to be older, and you’ll look back and wish that you had taken the time to be that young and invincible. Life never stops moving. As you get older, it even seems to speed up. I hope you take advantage of the time you have now. Breathe in the air a little deeper. Savor warm food a little longer. Write down conversations that make you smile. These are the moments that make everything else worth it. All you must do is slow down and take them in. I hope you hold space for yourself, and you stop apologizing for things that are not your fault. You deserve so much better than you got, but it’s your responsibility to 25
demand more. If you’ve taken anything away from this letter, I hope you’ve learned that. You are worthy. There will be days when you doubt this butkeep reminding yourself. You are in control, and you have the power to be better than you were yesterday. You will make friends that feel like what you’ve always imagined family to be. Life may not ever get easier, but you will learn how to stand up for yourself. There are great things ahead of you. Just know that you will be okay. One day you’re going to be happy. Just wait and see. I love you and hope you learn to love yourself at an earlier stage than I did. Love Always, Benita
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Hello younger self, I have been thinking about you for a long time now! I don’t know exactly when I came up with this biography but I know I have never forgotten it. It is very important to keep in touch with your family. I regret not keeping in touch with certain members of mine. But, we live and learn afterwards and along the way. Take, for example my sister. When I was 17 years old I met my sister! She is 2 years older than me. Sadly I don’t remember her name so I don’t have any way of tracking her down. But I do remember that she had a great sense of humor and she was very personable. We would hang out together sometimes. Back in the day my age was not a big factor in purchasing beer or alcohol, so I would toast with a shot, and she would toast with juice because she didn’t drink. Once we went shopping at a department store. She picked out a pair of plaid shorts. I was not crazy about them but I went with the flow. So I selected a shirt for her to match the pants she chose for me. In the end, I can say I still miss her after all these years. I pray she and her family are well and healthy. Keep in touch with whomever is important to you and enjoy whatever time you all have together. 27
Words to Live By LOVE is always greater than hate.
Don’t expect yourself from other people.
Slow progress is still progress. PUSH THRU! Happiness is subjective. Find what makes YOU happy.
Never compare yourself to others. They are not on your path.
Positivity is contagious. Spread it!
Words have POWER!
Everything happens for a reason.
Don’t be afraid to ask for help.
BE YOU! …and don’t apologize.
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My Biggest Full Circle Moment Written By: Marquita Antoinea
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A couple months ago, a friend of mine posted something on social media that referenced things in life always coming full circle. Immediately I knew what my biggest “full circle moment” to this point in my life was – sending my daughter to Morgan State University this fall. You see, I graduated from Morgan in 2007 after giving birth to my princess in 2004 during the fall semester of my sophomore year. While I was there (on academic scholarship no less), I was told more than once that “It would be too hard” or “You should just give up now” or “You ruined your life.” To make matters worse, I heard these words from the very people I thought would help me navigate this new layer of life as a teen mom and a full-time student. In the end, with a lot of hard work and discipline, sweat and tears, generous help from my mother and father, and irreplaceable time spent away from my daughter, I was able to graduate on time keeping my scholarship the whole time. Sure, I was proud of myself. But, let me tell you something! That little princess of mine gave me the biggest hug when I came off stage and said, “Mommy, you did it!” I will never forget the joy we both felt in that moment. She had basically ‘gone through Morgan’ with me. Now, here we are, and things are coming full circle. This month, I will drop my little Princess off to the place where it all began! I am beyond excited to see her begin the next chapter of her story at Morgan State University. 30
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My super power is empathy. Although it causes me pain at times, I wouldn’t have it any other way. -Marquita Antoineá
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What’s Your Other Super Power? li t y i b ya m is n e r e m p o w er w o n y! r e p ti th u s o s e h My ir d us e p h to st d r a to w
My super powers are determination, consistency, and faith in God.
My superpower is kindness and my ability to make others feel comfortable and at ease when in my presence.
My
su p e co m r po w er pas s io s ar e n nu r t u a t e a b e in g r in nd g.
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th g n re t s . is p r u e w ve o a p g r er e p v u e s yn l l My a r l it e
What’s Your Other Super Power??
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en c M y s ch e o u ra u p er pow g in r is h g er in g , up th e o th l if t is yh in g ave ers my , an fo r wh lan d the il e ea ma p s ste r in p r e c i t a y in g if t s g in gw a ti n h at g g iv G o an d en dh me as .
My super powers are hiding deep within my spirit-ears. They are disguised as regular ears yet the piercings allow the writings on the walls and the words between the lines to seep in and transform into revelations! My spiritears listen quite well. 35
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