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the city magazine for brighton & hove www.thelatest.co.uk
★ jobs ★ cars ★ news ★ listings ★ tv guide ★ 16 – 22 September 2008
FREE WEEKLY
ar t for all
get ready to be delighted and dazzled at the brighton art fair page19
rocking out gerard butler on counting time with guy ritchie all about eva how to get desperate housewife style
fashion in the frame make sure you stand out from the crowd with the best face furniture
The event not to be missed for anyone thinking of starting a business or in a growing business
20 September 10am – 4pm Hove Town Hall Hove Business Association 2008
BUSINESS START UP AND NEW BUSINESS EXHIBITION
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Contents
Welcome
★ latest jobs 4-6
★ latest listings 29–49
4 Time to move on? Start looking here
29 Reviews and listings index
Here it is, another Latest 7 with everything you need to know about going out and staying in this week in Brighton and Hove. This weekend it’s time for Brighton Art Fair, with work by 120 artists at the Corn Exchange (p19). If you want to start or improve your business, you can seek advice at Saturday's Business Start Up and New Business Exhibition in Hove (p7). Saturday is also International Peace Day, which will be celebrated with free yoga at Hove's Old Market – see letters (p18). Perhaps the Labour Party might want to mark the day with an in-fighting ceasefire. Phil Mills reports on what local MP Des Turner makes of the squabbles on page 17. Speaking of fighting, Guy Ritchie’s new film probably won't be sweetness and light. Latest 7 spoke to star Gerard Butler (p33). In news, I meet a restaurateur hoping to set up a world class catering college in Brighton (p15) and sport writer Joe Curtin looks back on an eventual week and the World Beach Volleyball Championships (p18). Sandra is annoyed at people who think models spend all their time at parties – after all, for a model, posing at a party is a bit of a busman's holiday (p12). On the same page, Dani is fed up of being told she has to eat macrobiotic this and organic that and run a marathon every day just to stay healthy. Alison has been exploring her forgotten past - no, not that lost weekend but the family tree which led to her being where she is today (p11) At school, the kids who wore glasses were often the ones who got teased. They're having the last laugh now as they have grown up to a world where glasses are uber stylish. Even those with 20/20 vision might be tempted after flicking through our fashion feature (p20). You can also pick up tips on how to look more like Eva Longoria Parker – yes, it does involve fake tan (p23). Britain's Got Talent might think it has invented the wheel, but variety performers have been entertaining the south coast for generations. Some of the best loved stars have come to Worthing – find out about the Best of British Variety Show 2008 on page 31. You might have heard that an up-coming, little known DJ by the name of FatBoy Slim is playing on Brighton Beach next weekend. Old stick in the mud Ron Outhouse isn't happy, read his poem in Bare Cheek (p14). Lucky Andrew Kay has spent a night at the chic and fabulous myhotel (p25) and music editor Jeff Hemmings is looking forward to Brighton Live (p35). In Celeb City, Jo Brooks celebrates Churchill Square's tenth birthday with a look at its celebrity visitors – did you spot Macca and Mucca in Debenhams? (p13) If you see a famous face around town, let us know by emailing letters@thelatest.co.uk or write to us at the address at the bottom of the page.
★ latest upfront 7–14
The lowdown on Miranda Sawyer, Camille O’Sullivan and Bestival
30 Comedy 7 Business: Start or grow your business with Hove Business Assocation’s Expo
10 Social diary and competitions 11 Alison delves deep into her past, plus the crossword
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How to start up in stand-up
30 Art A cure for nostalgia
31 Stage The Best of British Variety Tour 2008
12 Why Sandra hates parties and Dani hates diets
13 Famous bods in Churchill Square 14 Bare Cheek: Seven Dials remembered
★ latest news 15–18 15 The Big Story: how is Brighton going to produce the world’s best chefs?
17 Phil Mills quashes trouble in the Labour Party, and Christmas comes early
18 Letters and sport
★ latest lifestyle 19–28 19 Cover feature: Brighton Art Fair 20 Fashion: Trendy specs, style tips and how to look like Eva Longoria Parker
25 Andrew lives in luxury at myhotel
32 Film Gerard Butler on Guy Ritchie and all the listings around town
34 Kids and events The best family outings in Sussex
34 Books What makes a good children’s book?
35 Music Brighton Live, Early Music Festival, and Tricky in Bexhill Brighton Latest Download Chart
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36 Clubs and music listings Supercharged and all the best gigs
40 Gay Gay singing, win a Banksy and Will on posh men
36 Television Dani dissects Strictly Come Dancing; 7 days of listings
26 Hot List: Where to get the best grub
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30 01273
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Editorial: editorial@thelatest.co.uk Advertising: lynne@thelatest.co.uk Managing Editor Bill Smith
Editor Rachel Pegg
Business Director Angi Mariani
Assistant Editor Zara Baker
Creative Director Andrew Kay
Website Manager Paul Burgess
Production Director Fiona McTernan
Music Editor Jeff Hemmings
Finance Manager Sharon Caple
Chief Sub Editor Alison Swann
Art Director Stephen King
Listings Editor Nick Aldwinckle
Production Manager Neil Ive
Photography Tim Richardson Diana Frangi
Production Editor Victoria Nangle
Staff Writers Craig Driver Dani Winch Designers Rob Burdick Anand Day Peter Knight Steve Sawyer Sub Editors Joe Curtin Melina Greenfield
Advertising Director Lynne Edwards
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Advertising Sales Lucy Kamper Sophie Longhurst Marie Viviani Administration Claire Peerless Sara Henfridsson
Latest Homes Unit 1, Level 5 North New England House New England Street Brighton BN1 4GH
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Rachel Pegg Latest 7 Editor latest 7 3
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jobs
Call Marie on 01273 818150 ext 102
Call Centre Agents
Production Engineer
Technical Support Engineer
Brighton – £7.00–£11.00ph
Newhaven – £27k
East Sussex – £26k–£29k
Are you target driven and motivated by money? If you have a confident telephone manner and enjoy earning lots of money, we are looking for full time call centre agents to join an established lively team. The company is based in the heart of Brighton and offers a fun and lively environment.
Working as a member of the manufacturing team to monitor, develop, evaluate and continuously improve manufacturing processes through the application of Lean Manufacturing principles, thereby achieving the company’s performance targets in terms of quality, delivery, cost and safety. Manufacturing areas covered are assembly, powder paint plant, wet paint and internal machining processes.
Successful applicant will be based in the Oil & Gas Contract Sales Team and will work closely supporting the sales of the Oil & Gas products in the UK & Global markets. Sufficient engineering exposure to understand basic engineering processes, materials and typical manufacturing processes. This role has a wide scope of operation and requires a sound working knowledge of the Company's ERP system (EFACS) and the engineering knowledge required for BOM construction and its associated disciplines.
Conference/Congress Event Planner Brighton – £20–£25k Our client specialises in event planning and management & is seeking a skilled candidate with a background in organising congress and pharmaceutical events. If you feel you have the right attributes we would like to hear from you.
Credit Control Team Leader Brighton – £30k–£35k An exciting career opportunity has arisen to join a European Shared Service Centre in Brighton as a Credit Control Supervisor. Reporting to the Credit Control Manager, your main responsibilities will be to manage, support and develop a current team of seven Credit Controllers, all of whom are accountable for Credit Control activities in Germany, Austria, Switzerland, Belgium and Holland. Candidate must be fluent in English, German or Dutch.
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Customer Service Team Leader Brighton – £17k As a Customer Service team member you will be the main point of contact for external and internal customers within Belgium. You will be responsible for the processing of orders from your own customer portfolio as well as for all other ordering activities which will involve responding to enquiries and dealing with queries across the entire ordering process. You will be expected to provide holiday and sickness cover for other team members within your own team but you also might be expected to assist other teams in order to achieve KC key performance indicators. Candidate must be fluent in English, Dutch and French.
Production Planner Near Haywards Heath – £25k–£28k You will have previous production planning/scheduling experience ideally gained within a manufacturing environment and an in depth knowledge of working with MRP and/or MPS systems. You should have a good understanding of lean manufacturing techniques with a demonstrable track record of continuous improvement.
Outbound Sales Advisors Worthing – £16,368 + commission This is a large international company that offers excellent training. The role will involve warm calling existing customers with a view to cross-selling other products. Fantastic scope for progression for someone with good customer service and sales skills. .
hundreds of jobs every week
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Call Marie on 01273 818150 ext 102
Top Media Jobs Account Managers – iCrossing iCrossing is a global digital marketing company. We require Account Managers for both our London and Brighton offices to proactively retain and develop the client relationship and income to iCrossing. You will be responsible for a wide portfolio of Blue Chip clients and manage your portfolio as though you are managing your own business.
Web Editor – West Sussex County Council We need someone with solid news sense who knows how to grab the attention of young people and is prepared to work closely with them. You'll have your finger on the pulse of the latest Web 2.0 developments. Ideally you'll already have experience as a web editor and be full of good ideas for ways to boost visitor numbers. You'll join a small friendly team and be expected to show initiative and the ability to work well in a busy news environment.
Account Manager – Leapfrogg Ltd With a fast growing portfolio of clients, Leapfrogg have an exciting opportunity for an Account Manager. You will be responsible for managing clients ranging in size and across many different industries. Your role will include project managing the implementation of Paid and ‘Natural’ Search Marketing campaigns.
ASP Web Developer – Warren Barrett Design Ltd Warren Barrett Design are looking for an ASP programmer to join our team. You will need at least one year's experience as a programmer. The successful applicant will work on a variety of projects alongside other developers and the design team.
Systems Administrator – Brandwatch (formerly Magpie) Brandwatch is a cutting edge software company, whose business sits at the crossroads of 3 very exciting and very new technologies: the web, search and natural language analysis. The role demands a mixture of technical and interpersonal skills providing desktop support for all employees.
Design Assistant – University Of Sussex Students Union We are looking for an enthusiastic, well-organised and self-motivated individual who demonstrates creative flair to promote the USSU and its activities and services through the design and production of promotional materials and media, including web materials.
Design & Production Assistant – The Old Market Gain experience of working in a busy venue. Assist with the successful operations of the Marketing Team through production and organisation of all aspects of venue publicity, including Print, Website and Related Publicity Information.
.NET Software Graduate – Advent IT We are looking for a gifted, flexible and self-motivated software professional to join and contribute to the success of our business. The successful applicant will have proven experience of programming from specification to implementation and will be adept at developing new projects in a Microsoft environment.
Are you looking to recruit? Are you looking to expand your digital media business and recruit new staff? Wired Sussex can help. Our jobs board is viewed by over 10,000 digital media hopefuls every month, plus all job posters get to search through our CV database. Interested? Call Luke at Wired Sussex today to find out more: 01273 692 888
www.thelatest.co.uk/7/jobs
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Call Marie on 01273 818150 ext 102
✆ 01273 323344
LETTING AGENTS
51 Queen’s Road, Brighton brightonoffice@homeleasing.co.uk
✆ 01273 746600
72 Western Road, Hove hoveoffice@homeleasing.co.uk
Home Leasing, one of Brighton’s largest letting agents, have vacancies for the following positions: An Experienced Fulltime Administrator is required for the Brighton office. Applicants will need to demonstrate a working knowledge of computers, Microsoft Word and have good interpersonal skills. Duties to include answering telephone enquiries and dealing with tenant and landlord queries. Lettings experience is not essential as in-house training will be given.
Fulltime Lettings Negotiator/Property Manager is required for the Hove office; applicant will be required to meet with landlords and prospective tenants. They will carry out valuations on properties, compile inventories and check tenants in and out. Will require a clean driving licence. Lettings experience not essential as in-house training can be given.
Applicants need to be flexible, reliable and able to work as part of a team, a keen sense of humour is a necessity. Positions available mid October. Competitive salary depending on experience. Applicants should forward their CV to I.G. Pinder at Home Leasing, 51 Queens Road Brighton BN1 3XB by 24th September 2008.
w w w. h o m e l e a s i n g . c o . u k
latest
jobs Do you have Job Vacancies you need to fill? Why not advertise your vacancies within Latest 7 and reach over 100,000 readers? Latest 7 produces a successful job section every week, covering positions from admin roles to senior managers and account directors. From only £100 throughout September.
Call Marie for details on 01273 818150 ext 102 or email marie@thelatest.co.uk www.thelatest.co.uk/7/jobs 6 latest jobs
PROPERTY SALES & LETTINGS Dedicated to Brighton Marina
“The Service You’d Recommend”
The Role: Property Manager / Administrator required for a small but busy estate agent. The role requires the person to interact with tenants, landlords and contractors and deal with property related problems. To carry out mid-term inspections and be able to work on ones own initiative and also as part of a team. The position is a five day week and will include Saturdays by rota. Salary A.A.E.
The Person: You should have a positive attitude and happy to deal with problems in a methodical manner. You will be prepared to inspect properties and also have strong admin skills. Knowledge of Key Data or similar. You will be expected to have a hands on approach and to go the extra mile. Email CV to leigh@palmsagency.co.uk NO AGENCIES PLEASE.
25 Waterfront, Brighton Marina, East Sussex BN2 5WA
Tel: 01273 626000 enquiries@palmsagency.co.uk www.palmsagency.co.uk
hundreds of jobs every week
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BUSINESSEVENT
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OCEANSWELLBEING
Forever young Oceans Wellbeing is a new centre that offers solutions and techniques to help you to feel and look younger. What more could you want? Which is more important, your chronological age (the amount of candles on your birthday cake) or your biological age which is the way you look, feel and perform? Natural health breakthroughs during the past ten–15 years have shown it is possible to turn back our biological clocks and become functionally younger. Over thousands of years the human body and brain have developed a system of messages that signal the body to grow or decay. Thanks to the latest developments in fields like physiology, evolutionary biology, anthropology and ecology we now understand these messages and how to control them. The right kinds of exercise signals the body to grow, while sitting for too long signals the body to decay. Eating the right types of food, signals the body to grow. Eating a normal modern-day diet signals the body to decay. Connecting with family or a supportive peer group tells the body to grow. If the way you look, feel and perform is more important to you than the candles on your cake, you might agree it’s possible to stay younger longer. It’s hard to avoid media reports about degenerative diseases exceeding epidemic proportions and yet 70 per cent of the decay and illnesses and injuries associated with the normal model of ageing are avoidable. Oceans Wellbeing is the first centre of its kind in the UK offering unique solutions to those interested in becoming functionally
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younger (the way you look, feel and perform). Let’s face it we all know we need to exercise and the older we get the more we need it. How often? Experts now tell us that to send the right signals of renewal and repair to our body and brain we should be exercising six times a week. So we’d better find something we really enjoy doing or better still are obsessed with. Oceans Wellbeing Centre are currently inundated with enquiries from adults between 25 and 85 to sign up for the wellbeing programme. After three years of development the centre is finally up and running and you only need to read a handful of testimonials from some of their new members to see the results they are getting. They also offer an instructor’s programme for people passionate about health and interested in learning something new and exciting. The way things are going at the moment they need to train a lot of new instructors quite quickly to help cope with the response. Oceans Wellbeing Centre, 10–14 High Street, Rottingdean Seafront, Brighton, BN2 7HR. Call: 01273 307 500. Visit: www.oceanswellbeing.com
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BUSINESS
Easy-peasy Company Billing is trouble-free billing! Brighton-based director Lloyd Holman explains “As a freelance consultant, billing was always time consuming. There was no easy-touse, well priced, complete solution that handled time capture, quote/invoice management and bill delivery. Researching this further it became apparent that many tradespeople felt the same; less time billing equals more time earning, particularly in the credit crunch climate.� Company Billing offers an online quoting/invoicing system that provides the unique ability to instantly upload hours worked from a mobile phone, generate branded quotes and invoices online and with one click, post or email the bills directly to customers. Company Billing launches on 20 September at the Hove Business Association Startup and New Business Exhibition at Hove Town Hall, offering free trials of the system and a discounted six monthly subscription. For more information visit www.companybilling.com
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LATESTDIARY
COMPETITIONS
latestdiary
IN IT TO WIN IT
With Tim Richardson
Fantastic new prizes to win!
Outer Space
Massive Weekend
On Tuesday 2 September 2008, at Latest MusicBar, The Space (Southern Performance and Creative Energies) Brighton’s unique media and arts event brought together the creative community with special guest interviews. Guests for the evening were Mark Borkowski and Miranda Sawyer. Mark is Britain’s leading PR figure, who has a stellar list of Mark Borkowski (PR guru), Miranda celebrity and corporate clients that Sawyer (Award winning journalist) has included Michael Jackson, Damien Hirst, Mikhael Gorbachev, and The English National Ballet. What distinguishes Mark from other publicists is the pure showmanship of some of his PR, which has resulted in spectacular and memorable stunts for client campaigns. Miranda’s specialities are in music and popular culture. Miranda began her career at Smash Hits, before moving on to Select Magazine. She went on to write for Time Out, The Mirror and The Observer, which she still contributes to. Miranda broadcasts on BBC Radio, including the Radcliffe and Maconie Show, and TV, such as The Culture Show and Channel 4.
If you’re counting down to the weekend and plan on making it a big one – then don’t miss out on a to hear chance to win the ultimate soundtrack to suit your party mood! A definitive compilation, Massive Weekend is three fantastic CDs: CD1 featuring hip hop and R’n’B tracks, garage and bassline on CD2 and funky house to wrap things up. Featuring 2008 hits from Rhianna, Sam Sparro and Taio Cruz, this is one Massive Weekend you’ve been waiting for! The CD is out this week and we have three copies to give away! For a chance to win, tell us: Which successful group did Taio Cruz support on their tour in Brighton in March 2008? A Westlife B Backstreet Boys C Boys II Men
Three and Out A new DVD release this week is a hilarious road trip/buddy-movie with a heart. A get-out clause is the premise of the film, seen before in the likes of MTV’s Dead man on Campus. In Three and Out train driver Paul is fed up of city life when two people fall under his train in as many weeks, he just about has enough. Then he hears the ‘three and out’ rule. Three fatal accidents in a month qualify for early retirement with ten years’ salary! Plus, Paul’s just found the perfect third candidate... To win one of three copies of this new black comedy, entrants must be aged 15 and over, and tell us: The ‘three strikes and out’ stems from which sport? A Bowling, B Baseball, C Golf
to watch
Elvis vs Spankox Re:Versions The King is most definitely still in the building. Well, still being heard, as a new CD of one of the most iconic figures in music is released 30 years after his death. Released by Sony BMG Music Entertainment, this is a remix album with the original Elvis feel. DJ/producer Spankox has reworked and rearranged Elvis’ tracks using the latest technology. This special limited edition album features 11 to tracks, a bonus video of the single ‘Baby Let’s Play House,’ (Spankox version) and a 24-page booklet. This CD album is a must have for fans who want more of the King and a great way to introduce a new generation to his music. To win, tell us: Who remixed Elvis’ ‘A Little Less Conversation’ for chart-topping success? A JXL, B JML, C Boys Jazzy Jeff
Low Tide Ride On Monday 1 September 2008, to celebrate the equinox and one of the lowest tides of the year, cyclists gathered at Brighton Pier for a fun cycle dash over the exposed sand flats, heading west past, or under the West Pier, the King Alfred Leisure Centre and beyond until running out of sand. The furthest point reached was about halfway between Western Esplanade by Hove Lagoon and Shoreham Power Station. The next Low Tide Ride is still to be confirmed but is scheduled to be leaving from Brighton Pier on Wednesday 11 February 2009 from 6.00pm to 8.00pm. Time and tide wait for no-one, so if you can't make it to the start, join them on route.
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2 Point 4 Children See the classic show 2 Point 4 Children. Series 1–3 get a special DVD release next week. The first three series are here – meaning you can once again follow the lives of Ben and Bill Porter, their teenage children and family friend and neighbour – nutty Rona. Gary Olsen put in a top performance with perfect comic timing as a dad who’s not quite grown up himself. Mishaps and adventure follow their family, whether at home or away. Relive every moment and discover that your own family may be more normal than you first thought! To win one of three copies, tell us: What was Olsen’s occupation as dad Ben in the series? A Postman, B Heating engineer, C Policeman
to watch
To be in with a chance of winning, email: competitions@thelatest.co.uk with the name of the prize you wish to win in the subject box. Leave your answer to the question in the body of the email, along with your name, address and telephone number. Alternatively, write to us at the address at the front of the magazine. Closing date for entries: Tuesday 30 September.
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ALISON’SCOLUMN
See more at thelatest.co.uk
Swanning around Alison Swann considers if your family’s past affects your present
Who are you? Wandering home up Lewes Road I started to notice the gradual trickle and then tsunami-like flood of fresh faces. They’re back. Well, not exactly back, as for many this is their first time but it’s started again. The new kids are in town and as the new intake of students lands in the city, Bambi-eyed and still working out how much pasta can feed eight people sharing a house designed for two, I got to thinking about where they all come from? And how their arrival in town will influence future generations. Some will stay for three years, leave and never come back; some will drag it on a bit longer, or bounce backwards and forwards – like I have. And for others, this will be their life, the place they call home, where they will settle down, have children and build a life. We accept these changes with the passing of the seasons, but only a few generations ago this wasn’t the case. Most of our grandparents or great grandparents would have lived for generations within the same village or town. Never experiencing the shake-it-up-and-make-it-up life that we live today, where living in a place like Brighton we get to meet people from all over the world, as well as all over the country. It’s timely then that the new series of Who Do You Think You Are? has been on the goggle box in recent weeks. I love it, and judging by the huge success of the programme over the past few years, I’m not alone. In the first few episodes we’ve seen Patsy Kensit’s immense relief when she discovered that her great-great-grandfather was a hugely influential priest who looked after thousands of paupers in the East End. The relief came because she thought the Kensit family was full of thugs and hardcore criminals (her dad was best mates with the Krays). Then there was Esther Rantzen looking aghast, and to be honest quite excited, as she found out her great-grandfather was a master fraudster, Boris Johnson finding out he was descended from the illegitimate offspring of King George II (that explains a lot…) and Jerry Springer overcome by the emotion of following the path his Jewish grandmothers took to the Nazi death camps.
Patsy Kensit and her mother Margaret Doohan
Does it matter to know your past? As we all move about so much maybe the past becomes more important to give us a sense of self. The past can’t tell us who we are, it is more there to tell us who we came from and how we got to where we are now, and the journeys our ancestors made to bring us here. I have a friend who is very proud of his Spanish heritage (you’d never spot it as he is cunningly disguised under an Oxford accent and the Celtic physical characteristics of northern Spain). Another friend says he doesn’t want to know his family in Ireland because he is gay and all he knows of his Irish family is that two relatives who were gay men killed themselves. So he doesn’t feel the reception would be that warm. He may have a point. Anyway, I thought I’d have a look – you never know, maybe there was some uninherited family home waiting for me to rock up and claim. Yeah right. So I logged onto www.genesreunited.co.uk and within hours I was tumbling back through time, thorough my grandfather’s mother’s family in the hosiery mills of Leicester where it was all looking a bit Angela’s Ashes as child after child failed to make it to their fifth birthday. Through the military records of World War I where my great grandmother’s brother Alfred died aged 25, and then to a farm in deepest Wales where my great grandfather Joe was recorded in the 1901 census as being a ‘cow hauler’. His dad was the head cow man. There was a lot of cow action going on in that family. Ten years later he’d made it to Leicester and met my great-granny Annie. So we’re Welsh! Well kinda. I knew there was a reason I loved watching Gavin and Stacey so much. Tidy.
“As we move about so much maybe the past becomes more important to give us a sense of self”
Comments? Get in touch: alison@thelatest.co.uk
latestcrossword Cryptic 161
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Quick 161
ACROSS
DOWN
ACROSS
7 Hard substance derived from man and insect (7) 8 Article on foot complaint found in the woods (5) 9 A prickly subject for the botanist (5) 10 He’s simply amused by soldier taking baby horse to the French river (7) 11 Disguise made with square pieces (10) 14 Destroy strange alien in hat (10) 17 Walk a short way, then duck (7) 19 Estate founded on fidelity (5) 20 Ingenuous one in holy place (5) 21 Complaint disguised by frail mentality (7)
1 Body of vehicle with box attachment (7) 2 Unspeaking cat lost in the ruins of Turin (8) 3 Old hand, the animal queen (6) 4 Prohibit the force of noise (4) 5 Female parrot with yellow head (5) 6 Waxing in the street (10) 9 Pledge to express opinion with German introduction (10) 12 Char swallows bits of metal with delicacy (8) 13 Showed respect for instrument with sorrowful embrace (7) 15 Dark man may be red (6) 16 Vice surrounding Los Angeles being killed off (5) 18 Cut down by a cross king leaving hospital room (4)
7 Longing (7) 8 Fish (5) 9 Spike (5) 10 National figurehead (7) 11 Bizarre (10) 14 Dining establishment (10) 17 Walker (7) 19 Flyer (5) 20 Spring flower (5) 21 Move abruptly (7)
DOWN 1 Skull-cap (7) 2 Shamefulness (8) 3 Of like mind (6) 4 Snare (4) 5 Linger (5) 6 Temperature regulator (10) 9 Success (10) 12 Carver (8) 13 Vocation (7) 15 List of charges (6) 16 Little (5) 18 Run with long stride (4)
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EMOTIONS
STYLE
Model city
Dani’s diary
Sandra Omo exposes the truth behind the modelling party scene
Dani is fed up with over-the-top food fads and expendable exercise regimes An apple a day used to keep the doctor away. Now you need an apple, an orange, a banana, a handful of strawberries and a pineapple to meet your five-a-day quote. You should also consume a fish, eight pints of water, as many nuts and seeds as you can take, equal portions of carbohydrates and proteins on your dinner plate, a brisk walk, homegrown veg, Dr Gillian McKeith, four sessions of yoga along with two spinning classes, a jog and an expensive pomegranate juice. All that just to keep yourself from the doctor’s office, (and obviously to keep in with the ‘in-crowd’ because anyone who is anyone carries a bottle of POM around with them!) How do we ever find any time to actually live our lives? We spend all our extra cash on trying to prolong it so we can spend more cash attempting to look younger.
There is this common misconception, or should I call it propaganda; that models do party a lot. In fact, this seems to be all models do: partying, looking pretty, strutting their stuff and posing for pictures. My reply to this propaganda is a simple, “I wish”, or let me speak on behalf of all models, “We wish.” If modelling was all about the above, or as simple as the above, then we would have absolutely no reason to complain of stress, or of sleepless nights as a result of being over worked. I mean competitions would be so easy, and castings will be an ease for judges as they can just pick the winners from glancing at the models, after all, is it not all about looking pretty? I am not offended about this propaganda at all; the truth is I really wish modelling was as easy as just looking pretty. I am baffled at the number of people who think, and sincerely believe the above. Please note that it’s not what they believe or think that baffles me, rather it is the number of people that gets my attention, and I begin to wonder where they got this impression from in the first place. Could it be a rumour that was started ages ago, or is it just a perceived thing among non-models – especially those who want to become models because they think it’s all about enjoyment and fun?
“Models would hold on to a glass of champagne the whole night; wouldn’t even finish it” Whichever one it may be, the truth is that the fashion industry itself has played a huge role in building up such a wrong notion of what modelling is really about. Have you ever watched entertainment and fashion TV shows? Boy, it is all about how models have fun and party all day and night. And that is not all, as organisers have the habit of luring people to their shows by enticing them with luxurious after-parties, and speaking of after parties, it’s Fashion Week again – the parties never end. For every catwalk show, there are at least two after parties to follow, and these parties, at times, make more headlines than the catwalk itself. So since there are so many parties going on, can we blame people for thinking this is all we do? The answer is clear, no. However, the truth is models hardly party and do not actually have the time for a good party. Although there are many parties in the fashion industry, they are not usually fun parties for models. The people you see letting their hair down during these parties, 99 per cent of the time, are the organisers and their guests, not the models. When models attend after-parties, it is mainly to network, and although you may be dying to party hard, you cannot as you are either under the watchful eyes of your agency, too tired from the previous show or job, or just dying to catch a good night’s sleep so you can be up to the next day’s task. I, for one, have not attended any party for ages. I deliberately avoid after parties if I do not really have to stay. The last time I attended a party was during the last competition I participated in. There was literally a party every day for two weeks, and these were the kind of party where the models would hold on to a glass of champagne the whole night; would not even finish it, while being worried about the fact that they have wake up at 5am the next day for a shoot. So you see, it’s not us models that party, it’s the organisers and the industry, but then rumours always have a way of putting us in the spotlight. 12 latest 7
“Many of us don’t have the time and money to buy into everything that is supposed to give us super powers and super poos” Granted there are benefits to putting good things into your body, the main one being that you feel better. But when each month a new fad arises that promises to keep you fit and healthy and looking and feeling great you tend to lose heart, many of us don’t have the time and money to buy into everything that is supposed to give us super powers and super poos. The best advice I was given was to eat a rainbow. (Which is great because most of my favourite sweets come in all the colours of the rainbow). But it works that way and it’s a lot easier than measuring things out, adding strange herbs or turning it all bright green. Why can’t anything be kept simple anymore? I want to be healthy but I also want to be able to buy myself items of clothing or the more than occasional pair of shoes. I have never hidden that fact that I don’t really like Gillian McKeith but I would much rather her most of the time because you can switch her off along with your television but the real life people who spend their free time preaching to you about how to eat are unavoidable, especially when you live somewhere like Brighton. The strange thing is that the people who push their slightly strange overly healthy diets at you always do it with while whimsically looking lustfully at your chips. There is nothing wrong with straying from a rigid diet of fresh things (excluding cream cakes) and occasionally dipping your toe into the pond of forbidden sweets. Just as long as you do it that way round. Living on a diet of pure fat and grease and occasionally dipping your toe in the fresh fruit aisle won’t get you anywhere other than obese.
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9/12/08
12:20 PM
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AROUNDTOWN
Celebcity with Jo Brooks
Cheers! Celebrations for Churchill Square, Heather Mills causes ripples stateside and Steve Coogan is back Churchill Square celebrated its tenth birthday last week, many celebrities have graced the glass doors over the decade, here are my top six! 1 JK Rowling who opened the then Virgin Megastore (now Zavvi) – the author also signed some Harry Potter books to boot! 2 Russell Brand signing his Booky Wook in Borders. 3 Justin and Colin brought their makeover show and did some interior shopping.
sponsored by Heather was on the US equivalent of Strictly Come Dancing, Dancing with the Stars. But she was booted out after six weeks.
Suits you Sir Spotted actor Mark Williams walking up Queen’s Road past the new Dental Health Spa.
Coogan’s return Steve Coogan returns as Tommy Saxondale, the ex-roadie turned pest controller, aided by his often confused assistant Raymond. Tom Saxondale has been through the rock and roll mill and lived to tell the tale. He plays fast and loose, shoots from the hip and tells no lies… he’s a true maverick. Saxondale Series 2 is available to buy on DVD from 22 September 2008. In this latest series, Steve Coogan is joined by a host of great comedy talent including Ruth Jones (Gavin and Stacey, Little Britain), Morwenna Banks (Alien Autopsy, Ruddy Hell: It’s Harry and Paul), Rasmus Hardiker (Lead Balloon, The Rotters Club) and Darren Boyd (Green Wing, Smack the Pony). There are also special guest appearances from Chris Ryan (The Young Ones) Rosie Cavaliero (Jam and Jerusalem) and Kevin Eldon (Hyperdrive, Nighty Night). Saxondale Series 2 was written by Steve Coogan and Neil MacLennan and directed by John Henderson (Hyperdrive).
4 Heather Mills and Paul McCartney while still married visited on a regular basis. 5 Katie Price with all kids in tow, doing what she does best – shop! 6 Mark Hayes from GMTV did a talk about fashion trends to shoppers. Happy birthday from everyone here at the Latest!
You’re fired! Hove resident Heather Mills has yet again hit the headlines, this time she has lost a role in the US version of Celebrity Apprentice — after demanding a clause in her contract guaranteeing a place in the final. US billionaire Donald Trump fronts the US show, but producers at US network NBC got cold feet when she insisted she appear in the final regardless of her success in the show’s tasks. Producers refused, even though she headed the list of celebrities they wanted for the programme. They told 41-year-old Mucca, ex-wife of Beatles legend Sir Paul McCartney, that her services were not required. An NBC source said: “The network were originally very keen on getting her involved. They thought it would be a clever move, attracting lots of publicity for the show. But her demands were ludicrous and it soon became clear that getting her involved would be a headache. “It was the final straw when she said she wouldn’t take part unless she was a dead cert for the final – even after it was explained that wasn’t how the show worked. She was politely informed that NBC wouldn’t be following up their interest in her appearing.” The show mirrors The Apprentice in the UK and features billionaire tycoon Donald Trump in Sir Alan’s starring role. The new series starts filming in a fortnight and will be broadcast next January. Ex-newspaper editor Piers Morgan won last year’s show and went on to bag a judging slot on America’s Got Talent and Britain’s Got Talent.
Jo Brooks is director of Brighton-based PR company JBPR Ltd, 01273 622555, www.jb-pr.com
To comment on any of these stories or send in any news stories email editorial@thelatest.co.uk
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014_LS390_cheeky/stars
9/10/08
11:33 AM
Page 2
ONLY JOKING!
See more at thelatest.co.uk
Bare cheek Brian Mitchell and Joseph Nixon’s thoroughly scurrilous Brighton column A local poet writes
“Cool for cats” – so sang dirty, filthy, cockney-costermonger new-wavers Squeeze, in their 1979 anthem of the same name. Conversely “How much is that doggie in the window?” sang Mel Smith in the ill-fated, yet strangely long-running, Delta Card campaign of the mid ‘90s. But which is the better domestic mammal – canine or feline? We asked the same old bunch of local celebrities their opinions on the matter. Like anybody cares…
Retired gasfitter and local bard Ron Outhouse, 69, presents another poem written especially for Bare Cheek. Ron’s self-published poetry collections, Forgotten Snowdrops, Eaten Out Of Outhouse And Home!!, and It’s Not Natural, Is It? They Should Shoot ‘Em All In My Opinion are all available from Brighton bookshops. He is a regular (and lively!) contributor to many local newspaper letters pages and radio phone-in programmes.
A plea to Mr Norman ‘Fatboy Slim’ Cook Dear Mr Cook, I do believe This month is bringing down Your ‘beach party’ once again Upon our humble town. Now people like to dance and sing There’s nothing wrong with that! Only a churl would fain deny Their right to quaff and chat. But Mr Fatboy, hear my plea! Pay heed to my distress! Please tell these folks how to behave, Don’t let them make a mess!
We don’t want vomit on our streets, Or beer cans on our beach, Or mucky talk, or use of drugs. This lesson you must preach. And as to who will come along, To hear you play your tunes, I sincerely hope there won’t be – (The rest of this verse has been censored. A copy of this poem in its entirety has been handed to the Metropolitan Police due to its use of inflammatory and racist language, death threats, and gross personal libel upon the person of Gary Wilmot.)
In & Out IN
Cats or dogs?
OUT
• Charcoal tablets
• The Cones Hotline
• Michael Ignatieff
• The Munsters Today
• How To Be A Complete Bitch
• How To Be A Complete Bastard
• That cartoon in which a hen is seen gazing, shocked, at a cornerstone that reads “This stone was laid by the mayor and mayoress”
• The phrase ‘Period features’ used as an insult • Ectoplasm
• Rapido
Astral Angi ★Finding truth in the stars★
Leo Sayer “Cats.” Cate Blanchett “Dogs.” Nick Cave “Ah – now the word is that you poms seem to think that old Nick here is a tad vacillating when it comes to reaching a decision. Well, fair dinkum. With that in mind I’ve given this matter a lot of thought, and can state categorically that my preference is absolutely, and 150 per cent, dogs. Or cats. Oh, it’s no good – I can’t decide. It’s like trying to choose between my children or something.” Luke Pritchard “Budgies.” Patsy Palmer “Great big Alsatians” Norman cook “Zoë and I have a pair of slugs each, actually. They’re the trendy new thing. They’re quite capable of answering to their names, and even showing affection. Although they don’t.”
Buy the CD Bardsley’s, country music with c-hip s-hop beats at Bardsley’s and Borders NOW!
Kevin Rowland “A dog hollowed out and filled with cats.” Chris Ellison “Police dogs.” Steven Berkoff “Ah, an age old question – and the one by which humanity is most commonly divided. I myself have been torn apart by the conflicting claims on my loyalty of these two extraordinary beasts. As a toddler our family’s basset hound Bobo was my constant and only companion. When he died I was inconsolable and wept for weeks. As a young man, in a bid to appear sophisticated, I purchased a Burmese, purebred, which I would take everywhere, upon a leash. When restaurants refused us entry, little Astrophel, or so I named him, would wee upon their doorstep in protest at such small-mindedness. When he died, I was inconsolable, and wept for weeks. I swore that from that day I would never again allow my heart to be broken in such a way. Since then my constant companion has been my goldfish, Little Tommy Timkins, who accompanies me to all my auditions. He is everything a cat or a dog fails to be: witty, wise and, most of all, a good listener!” David Van Day “I’s tried to get a cat and a dog to fall in love once so I’s could make a new kind of creature called a Cog or a Dat, right, but it didn’t work. Next I’s gonna try to make a horsey and a sheep fall in love. If they do it’ll make me hundreds of pounds, and I’ll be able to afford to buy a pair of trousers – the first pair I’ve ever ‘ad! And then my mum can be proud of me.” Next week: Would you rather see the devil at a crossroads at midnight, or have the runs at a nudist colony at tea time?
BARDSLEY’S
WINNING FISH AND CHIPS 22/23/23A BAKER ST, BRIGHTON BN1 4JN
01273 681256
ARIES (MAR 21–APR 20)
CANCER (JUNE 22–JULY 22)
LIBRA (SEP 23–OCT 22)
CAPRICORN (DEC 21–JAN 19).
My mate Dennis is an Aries and he reckons all this is a load of hooey. Well Dennis, be afraid, be very afraid, as this week your stars are looking very gloomy.
David is Cancer and about the crabbiest person I know. Try to relax and open your hearts this week, Cancerians and especially you David, this tantrum is getting a bit boring.
Poor, poor Connie my little Libran pal with the dented libido. Well, chin up girl! Now is the time for Libra to let rip and go wild. Put away your inhibitions and search for your inner animal.
Lovely Len is a bit of an old goat in more ways than one, but I have come to expect that. Capricorn man may be easier to deal with than goaty woman, facial hair or none.
TAURUS (APR 21–MAY 21)
LEO (JULY 23–AUG 22)
SCORPIO (OCT 23–NOV 21)
AQUARIUS (JAN 20–FEB 19)
Veronica however is totally trusting in my readings and lives her life by what I say. This week Veronica can expect to be treated very well by a close friend. Half six in The Bugle then Ronnie.
Catherine is my closest Leo friend and not exactly typical as she has Taurus rising. In fact Cath has most people rising, if you follow my drift. Pull in your claws and enjoy the moment.
Despite trying to avoid Scorpios all my adult life I seem to have too many Scorpio acquaintances to list here. It either says something good about Scorpios or that I am Ms Tolerant.
Oh dear, how does one categorise one’s Aquarian amis? Let’s start with dippy, daft, deluded, delusional, dumb, dodgy, drama queens, dangerous and dear – dear in both senses.
GEMINI (MAY 22–JUNE 21)
VIRGO (AUG 23–SEP 22)
SAGITTARIUS (NOV 22–DEC 20)
PISCES (FEB 20–MAR 20)
Simon and Andrew are the only Gemini twins that I know but a very well balanced pair they are. This week sees Geminis in a sharing mood: share, share, share.
Strangely I seem to have no friends who are Virgo, it must be an age thing. Virgos should open up to new ideas. I have a long list of friends who will be willing to help you with this.
All my Sagi friends are over 75 or if younger behave as if they are over 75. Take comfort in your pension and apply for everything you might be entitled to. Cardigans are appropriate at any age.
My two best fishy friends are Roy and Muriel, fishy but never dodgy. You all need to get a Roy and a Muriel in your life – mine come with lashings of chips and mushy peas, yum.
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To talk to Astral Angi please email angi@thelatest.co.uk
015_LS390_newsbigstory
9/12/08
12:15 PM
Page 1
latest news No nonsense, just news. Send your stories to: news@thelatest.co.uk
Rachel Pegg reports on how Brighton could become a world class training centre for chefs
Cook school Forget Jamie Oliver’s Fifteen – a Hove chef is close to setting up a catering training college that will rival the world’s best cookery schools. Rosario Guarneri, owner of the Arrogant Frog in Church Road, has been raving for years about his plans for TEACH: The European Academy for Catering and Hospitality. Some people thought it was just a dream. But now Rosario has the backing of City College Brighton and Hove and the scheme is moving forward impressively. Rosario wants The European Academy for Catering and Hospitality (TEACH) to become even more famous than Oliver's London restaurant. Fifteen takes young people from disadvantaged backgrounds and teaches them to cook to an enviable standard. Rosario hopes that he and his partners at the academy will also be able to give young people – from any background – a chance to learn a trade that will put them at the top of their game and stand them in good stead for life. He said: “I want to show them: you could be like me. I came to this country with £10 in my pocket. I would like to give back what the Great British gave to me.” A well known figure on the Brighton and Hove restaurant scene, Rosario is the former owner of Victor’s French gastronomic restaurant in The Lanes and of Le Petit Pain, a boulangerie and patisserie, which he ran in his current premises before opening The Arrogant Frog in 2003. At Victor’s he cooked for national and international figures such as former Florida secretary of state Katherine Harris, John Prescott, Ken Livingstone and many others. He is passionate about food and ensuring that young people have a good future. He hopes that trainees will come from all over Europe and the world to study at TEACH. He is meeting with the Learning and Skills Council to discuss the project in early October. He said: “We need to look after our children’s futures; to train a new generation of business people.” Rosario has spent years campaigning for the support of local and national politicians and has received messages of support from UK higher education minister Bill Rammall, Hove MP Celia Barlow and Conservative Party leader David Cameron wishing him luck. It is hoped the Learning and Skills Council will put forward some of the funding. Rosario said: “We want the government to invest in the future.” The details of the proposals for the academy are still in negotiation but Rosario has big plans, such as having compulsory Spanish, German, French and English lessons for all students initially and later introducing lessons in Chinese Mandarin. He also wants students to get a taste of the demanding regime they will have to work under as professional cooks. Rosario said: “It will be
“A chef doesn’t cook any more. He does paperwork. Before you are a chef you have to become a cook”
intensive but we will bring back a sense of discipline. It is going to be tough. There will be no swearing like Gordon Ramsay.” In addition to learning in a classroom, students will spend time working with different employers in each of the course’s four disciplines: food preparation and cookery; food service; front of house and reception; and accommodation services and housekeeping. Trainees will receive an educational maintenance allowance. Their progress will be monitored by a mentor. Students will be able to specialise in the latter part of the three-year course. Rosario has previously trained young restaurant staff from the UK, Germany, Holland, France, and further afield. He is the former manager and training officer of the Thistle Hotel, Brighton and has a number of young chefs working for him at his Hove premises. He claims to have invented a new style of training which takes things back to the basics. “To become a chef, you need to go back to the beginning,” he explained. “I don’t like to use the word ‘chef’. It is a cook. There is a big difference. A chef doesn’t cook any more. He does paperwork. It is wrong. Before you become a chef you have to become a cook. “People come here and say, I am a chef. No, you are 24 years old. You are not a chef. I don’t believe you can be a chef before the age of 27” In fact Rosario does believe in the capabilities of younger chefs – his current head chef, who has prior training in France, is just 23. Rosario says he is developing his kitchen management skills and professional attitude, not teaching him how to cook, so the sentiment remains true. Rosario’s method of teaching is patient, methodical, passionate and the breadth of his knowledge will take a long time to learn. “It is like running a marathon every day. It is a challenge. You can’t rush life. Every contract has been settled round a table, because when you eat, you are happy.” If TEACH is a success, Rosario wants to open in other locations. Please visit www.thearrogantfrog.com for more information.
Rosario
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9/12/08
2:33 PM
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LATESTNEWS
news summary
7 days of headlines
Free bicycle repairs, community cycle rides and picnics are taking place this week as part of European mobility week. Brighton and Hove City Council has given grants of up to £500 to 25 community groups to encourage others to ditch the car. Car free day takes place on Sunday, 21 September, with free rickshaw rides between the piers and a music stage in Little East Street, Brighton. A report revealed Sussex Police are more likely to hold people with mental health problems in cells than any other force. The Independent Police Complaints Commission found that over a year, 277 per 10,000 people in custody in Sussex were detained under the Mental Health Act. Cheshire and Merseyside Police each held just one per 10,000. Sussex Police said they were working closely with Sussex NHS Partnership Trust to reduce the numbers and in the last 12 months the force has opened two place of safety suites in Worthing and Eastbourne.
Prostate publicity An artist raised £500 for a cancer charity by selling a cast of his dead father's face. After, a sculpture by Brighton artist Jamie McCartney, was sold at an auction at the Liberty store, London last week. The Men Only exhibition and auction in aid of the Everyman Campaign contained works by contemporary male artists including Damien Hirst, Sir Peter Blake, Rankin and Martin Parr. It was held in memory of sculptor Allister Bowtell, who died of prostate cancer in 2006. Jamie McCartney's father James Spoddart McCartney, 85, died of metastatic prostate cancer on 22 August this year. The artist said making a cast of his father's face was his most emotionally challenging project to date and he went through much soul searching before deciding to proceed. He said his father allowed him to cast his face nine months before his death, which he felt gave him permission to do it again. It was the first time he has taken a cast from a dead body. He said: “It is quite an unusual thing to touch your father’s face in that way. I think
he would have been very pleased to promote Everyman. “I am glad I did it. It was part of the healing process for me.“ The jet-black bitumen cast was sold to a private collector. One man dies of prostate cancer every hour in the UK. The Everyman Campaign raises awareness of and funds research into prostate and testicular cancer. For more information, visit www.everymancancer.com
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NEWS
Art for Seven Dials There are just a few days left to pick a piece of artwork to be installed on the Seven Dials roundabout. Three artists have produced prototypes inspired by architects Amon and Amon Henry Wilds who created many of Brighton's famous buildings. The statue, which will be paid for by private donation, is part of measures proposed by Brighton and Hove City Council to improve the accident hotspot. See the artwork at Mishon Mackay, 99-101 Dyke Road, Brighton, daily until Saturday 20 September, from 10am to 5pm. A panel of residents, retailers, councillors and council officers will choose the winner at the end of September, taking public opinion into consideration. To comment, contact Siobhan Osgood on 01273 293907 or email siobhan.osgood@brighton-hove.gov.uk
City space Brighton and Hove City Council leader Mary Mears makes the best use of space The city council is thinking hard about space this week. Not the sort of space that has planets and stars in it – but the urban space right here in Brighton and Hove. Being located between the sea and a beautiful, protected countryside setting is a blessing for any coastal town. But because of the comparatively small area of our city, it presents a particularly challenging problem – the problem of space. This means that, as this city continues to develop, we will have to ask ourselves where we can put the new schools, shops, housing and other infrastructure? A healthy, growing city also requires more jobs and more office space, which brings me back to this week. We have just unveiled seven disused bin stores that have been converted into artists’ studios on the Bristol Estate, in Whitehawk. Together with local people, we have helped convert this space because it is will help accommodate members of a growing employment sector – the creative industries, which include everything from digital media to film, video and TV to fashion, art and advertising. The sector is growing by five per cent a year, creating nearly 800 new jobs – fantastic news for the city at a time of national economic gloom. The city council must do all it can encourage growth to continue to help accommodate new enterprise with its own creative thought. Part of the council’s thinking is to use the space we do have to promote and showcase our city. That is why I was delighted to see Madeira Drive used as the venue for the World Under-21 Beach Volleyball Championships. The organisers, with the blessing of the council, brought in 120 tonnes of
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sand and constructed a temporary 2,000 seat stand to create the Nivea Yellowave Beach Volleyball Arena. Congratulations to Italy, who were victorious in the men’s final, and to Holland, whose ladies took the gold and silver medals. The competition was hugely exciting for the players and supporters and for the city. Just one week after the handover of the Olympic torch, it was a real privilege for Brighton & Hove to host this country’s first World Championship Event as part of the build-up to the 2012 Olympics. Hosting an international tournament that includes 85 teams from 26 countries is fantastic for enhancing the city’s international reputation as a venue for business, cultural and sporting events. Players and officials were said to be very impressed with city, so there’s a good chance that at least one country will chose to base their training camp here before the Olympics. If the council can continue to use Brighton and Hove’s spaces to attract international events and to help business grow and develop, the long-term future of the city will look very bright indeed. So all you need to do now is – watch this space.
If you would like to comment on these stories please email news@thelatest.co.uk
019_LS3890_newsphil
9/10/08
4:15 PM
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LATESTNEWS Phil Mills looks at what Brighton MP Des Turner makes of the trouble at the top of the Labour party
Labour Pains Calls for Gordon Brown to resign to avoid Labour’s “utter destruction” at the next General Election have won little support from Brighton MP Des Turner. The 69-year-old Labour member for Kemptown, with little to lose since announcing he would not seek re-election, hit back at former Home Secretary Charles Clarke who claims Labour is “destined for disaster”. Dr Turner, Brighton MP since 1997 when Labour swept to power, said: “If Labour does meet disaster at the next election then Charles Clarke will have made his contribution to that. “Charles Clarke is a man who speaks for virtually no-one I know – apart from Charles Clarke. “He is embittered because he is no longer in a position of power and speaks out and does things just to remind people he exists. “I can’t see any functional reason for him, I never thought he was any good as a minister and I don’t think anyone, except Charles Clarke, shares a high opinion of him.” Political pundits are predicting Dr Turner’s and the city’s two other constituencies could all be won by the Conservatives at the next election. Kemptown ward is considered marginal while Celia Barlow’s Hove and David Lepper’s Brighton Pavilion traditionally have been politically blue. Dr Turner is not ruling out a disaster for Labour but added: “If there is going to be one then it will only happen if Labour lets it happen.” He conceded there “clearly are problems” but Labour would win back support if it dealt with them in a “sensible and adult” fashion. Dr Turner, although not standing again, said he would
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NEWS
help his replacement candidate by pounding the pavements, door knocking and canvassing. He slipped quickly into election mode: “The real disaster would be if the Tories won and they cut Charles Clarke taxes. That would lead to a serious recession and cuts in education and health.” Dr Turner said he had some sympathy with those who wanted Gordon Brown to step aside for a new leader but added: “I don’t think there is anyone better than Gordon at present and the process of a challenge could be very damaging and push Labour even further behind. “My opinion is that we (Labour) have just got to make it work under Gordon – he has made mistakes and shown imperfections and he has to address those problems – but the party should support him.”
“Dr Turner said he had some sympathy with those who wanted Gordon Brown to step aside“
Des Turner
O Come All Ye Shoppers Christmas decorations, cards and Advent calendars have gone on sale in shops – more than three months before the annual holiday. A spokesman for the Wyevale garden centre at Brighton racecourse defended the early start: “It might be a bit of a surprise to some people to find Christmas in our stores at the beginning of September but our customers tell us that is what they want. “Lots of people like to plan ahead and spread the cost of Christmas while others like to have a good look round at what is on offer.
“A lot just enjoy the anticipation of Christmas and if you are sending cards and presents to friends and family abroad – you can’t start too early.” Christmas puddings are being sold in supermarkets but the displays are being shunned by at least one shopper interviewed outside the Wyevale branch. Linda Vaughan, 39, said: “Christmas seems to get earlier and earlier and, frankly, it turns my stomach thinking about all the expense to come. “I’ll be avoiding all the displays for as long as possible.” latest 7 17
018_LS390_letters/sport
9/12/08
8:09 AM
Page 2
LATESTLETTERS&SPORT
Letters
Send your comments to letters@thelatest.co.uk
Latest Sport Round ups and rumblings from the Latest Sports Bunker
Ready to fly? Latest Sport’s Joe Curtin is delighted and excited at the prospect of more British sporting success
Meditate for peace I am writing with an open invitation to all peaceful warriors who wish to join us and celebrate this year’s International Peace Day on Sunday 21 September at 7pm at the Old Market, Hove. The Yoga Club presents ‘Are You Awake’, a mass guided meditation, an annual gathering of people who wish to make and nurture peace within. I am a Brighton-based yoga teacher and artist, and I’ll lead a mass Yoga Nidra, a yogic form of sleep where the body relaxes fully but the mind remains awake. This ancient practice lasts 45 minutes and will be followed by soul-nourishing music from the angelic voice and sound of Madrum – for 108 minutes of peace, as part of the global peace effort. I will present and narrate the teaching live. Madrum will perform too; their music blends Indian harmonium, guitar, keyboards and intricate, textural percussion. They are a delight and this is a rare opportunity to experience their music in the South East. For free tickets call the box office on 01273 736222. Donations are invited. This event is part of UN Peace Day, Globalmala and Peace One Day. Please join us. Namaste, Amanda Evans, www.theyogaclub.co.uk
What a strange couple of weeks for British sport. One of successes and failures, of high excitement and drudging boredom. Of great skill and stunning ineptitude. And that was just the England football team. After the success of the Olympics, our less-abled heroes stood top of the Paralympics medal table. We then saw a British male tennis player in a Grand Slam final. A resurgent Federer ultimately put Andy Murray to the sword but, love him or hate him, Murray’s achievement has to be applauded – having beaten Nadal. Dare one even consider it: could we be seeing the emergence of a British tennis player as the third best in the world? An outrageously optimistic thought, but one that seems less ridiculous of late.
“Have we uncovered ourselves a world-beater?” Who says nothing exciting ever happens in Belgium? The previous Sunday saw one of the great Grand Prix. It was thrilling to watch Hamilton and Raikkonen go wheel to wheel. It was a race that had you on the edge of your seat and punching the air. Only for the stewards to give Lewis a 25-second penalty, demoting to third. Does the FIA want to see people race or do dull Ferrari-led processions? Further incompetence as England laboured to an unconvincing win over Andorra, however in the 4-1 drubbing of Croatia they passed crisply and looked like a confident unit who knew what they were doing. And in Walcott, have we uncovered ourselves a world-beater? Time will tell. In these days of awful weather and an air of gloom, perhaps our sports people can finally give us something to cheer about.
International Peace Day
SWATCH FIVB Junior World Championships 3–7 Sept
As I write newspapers are full of stories of new wars, of people’s basic humanity and needs being overlooked, of terrorism and indoctrination. 2008 sees a world that is full of fear and hate. John Lennon asked us to imagine a world where love and peace truly reigns – but what would that world be really like? Picture the following scenarios of a future where peace ruled on the Earth… A world where followers of different religions, instead of fighting each other, joined in special inter-faith celebrations recognising that human beings are really not all that different. A world with no boundaries, where leaders, as passionate about peace as they are now about war, decree ‘peace days’ throughout the year as special holidays, where people pledge their commitment to one humanity and the ending of suffering. A world defined, not by greed, by fear, by hate, but by a common understanding and appreciation of the gift of human life, no matter from what country, race, religion, or belief. International Peace Day is a start. Established by a United Nations resolution in 1981, the International Day of Peace was first celebrated in September 1982. Jeremy Gilley took the gauntlet of this day and ran with it, founding ‘Peace One Day’ in 1999, an annual day of global ceasefire and non-violence. On 21 September 2008, as has happened since that date, many individuals and groups will be demonstrating their commitment to peace. Through vigils and ceremonies – even comedy nights – people across the globe will focus on bringing peace into a world which has seen far too much destructive conflict. In order to celebrate, extended coverage of the award-winning daily TV series Words of Peace, will be broadcast from 6-8pm on Sky Open Access 2, channel 200. You can also watch it on Sky Open Access 2, channel 200, every week day at 10am and Saturdays and Sundays at 10am and 6pm. Please visit www.wordsofpeace.net. Gretta Helps
A total of 38 men’s and 33 women’s teams from 26 countries competed. In the men’s, Italy’s Francesco Giontella and Paolo Nicolai successfully defended their gold medal at the SWATCH-FIVB Junior World Championships presented by NIVEA SUN here in Brighton by beating teams from Germany and the Netherlands to claim the 2008 title at the NIVEA SUN Yellowave Beach Sports Venue. “Although our first title was very special, this year’s gold medal is very important as we validated our previous success,” says Giontella. “I think we put more pressure on ourselves this week and everyone targeted us as the favourites. We did not lose a set this week, so we are very pleased with our play.” In the women’s Marleen Van Iersel realised her gold medal aspirations as she teamed with Daniëlle Remmers to capture the title for women under the age of 21 in the all-Netherlands finale. Van Iersel and Remmers scored a 21-14 and 21-14 win in 32 minutes over 23rd-seeded compatriots Sophie Van Gestel and Michelle Stiekema in the finals after winning semi-final matches earlier on Sunday.
You can also write to: Letters, Latest Homes Ltd, Unit 1, Level 5 North, New England House, New England Street, Brighton BN1 4GH 18 latest 7
“I will always remember Brighton since I finally claimed gold at my last junior’s event,” said the 20-year old Van Iersel, who was named the SWATCH most outstanding player this week. The NIVEA SUN Yellowave staged another cracking highoctane volleyball event and is furthering Brighton’s name as the British home of beach volleyball.
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COVERSTORY Claire Fearon ‘Brighter Than Bright’
Angela Charles ‘It Isn’t Always Like This’
Patrick O’Donnell ‘Ascension’
Art for all Brighton Art Fair is back for another stunning show Brighton Art Fair is held every autumn in the beautiful Corn Exchange in the heart of the city. Showcasing over 120 contemporary artists and attracting a capacity audience of over 5000 visitors, the fair has built a strong reputation for exhibiting exceptional quality artwork in a welcoming, friendly environment. Brighton Art Fair is the largest single visual art exhibition on the South Coast. Year on year sales growth have exceeded expectations with over half a million pounds worth of art being sold in 2007, not including the commissioning work, which inevitably arises from such events. Painters, printmakers, Ruth Allen ‘Green Kitsch’ photographers and sculptors are chosen in a rigorous – and competitive – selection process to represent the highest standard and most exciting work across a wide variety of techniques and subject matter. This art fair is unusual in that the artists themselves sell their work, direct to the public, bringing a personal feel to the viewing and buying process. Visitors get to enjoy meeting the artists to learn about their creative inspirations, techniques and future projects. Organised by Jon Tutton and Charlotte Hardy ‘Coffee Pot’ local artist Sarah Young the Brighton Art Fair is set once again to be a roaring success. Jon said: “Each year we are amazed and delighted by the quality of the art work coming in. We have to make difficult decisions as to what we can and can’t accept not only in terms of quality, but also to ensure that we present to the public an exciting range of work across all media and styles. The difficulty is choosing the right amount of the right kind of
work. Visitor feedback is always very positive – we need to continue to meet our visitors’ high expectations!” Brighton Art Fair provides a relaxed and informal way to buy art and has introduced many people to purchasing original art for the first time, with many coming back every year to add to their collections. Many of the exhibitors are local to the Brighton area, but the fair also attracts artists from all over the UK and this year exhibitors from France and America are also being welcomed. Along with exceptional work by these artists, Chris Knight who graduated just last year, will be bringing his acclaimed installation of carved birds to the fair’s cafe and adjoining areas. The centrepiece will be a Dovecote with sculptures and soundscape. Sussex-based sculptor Christian Funnell will be exhibiting three of his large metal sculptures in the lobby area. Christian's work is widely seen in the area as he has worked on various architectural projects, such as the large 'Avalon Gate' in West Street and Newhaven's Cormorant as well as having work commissioned for the Sussex County Hospital and for the shop Appendage in the North Laine. Brighton Art Fair is delighted to welcome back the ARTHOUSE – a social enterprise based in Godalming offering adults with epilepsy, learning and physical disabilities the chance to work closely with professional artists to create artworks in printmaking and painting. The quality and honesty of this work is wonderful to see and is well reflected in the sales each year. A café run by Food Solutions Partnership offers a place to relax, take refreshment and contemplate potential purchases. The fair will be opened at the private view on the evening of Thursday, 18 September by Michelle Ogundehin the editor-in-chief of Elle Decoration magazine, who are supporting the event. The private view is the best opportunity to get first pick of the art on offer and is also a fantastic social event with music this year by Vive La Fip and an abundance of cupcakes and wine being served by the Burlesque Theatre Group. Admittance is by invitation only but a limited number of tickets are available to purchase at £10 each. Brighton Art Fair is offering Latest 7 readers the chance to win two for the price of one tickets to the fair. Please email 241@brightonartfair.co.uk with your name and address and the first 50 received will be sent a ticket. Brighton Art Fair, 19–21 September, 2008 Corn Exchange, Church Street, Brighton. latest 7 19
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HEALTH
See more health tips at wavemagazine.co.uk
Spectacular There’s a sight for sore eyes at Specs Opticians that will make all things clear, Zara Baker discovers When was your last eye check-up? One year? Two? Lost track? The optician may not be ‘feared’ like a visit to the dentist’s chair but it’s still avoided with simply not finding the time a common reason. At Specs Opticians in the heart of the funky North Laine at Kensington Gardens, a visit could be made in your lunch break if you work nearby. Easy: That’s your eyes sorted for another year. The focus at Specs is on fashionable and quirky eyewear. Specs offer a digital photo service, where you can see how different frames will suit the face. Friends can help in the decision-making process by viewing the pictures online. It beats making a snap decision in store. There are many styles of frames available. The decision is harder but it means there are plenty of fashionable choices to suit. Gone are the days when specs were associated with ‘the brains’ at school. Children put off wearing glasses, struggling to read off the board, in effect putting further strain on their eyes. Having the correct lenses will mean you’re not missing out on seeing the world, and health problems such as migraines can also be avoided as the strain put on the eyes is reduced.
“Health problems such as migraines can be avoided as the strain put on the eyes is reduced”
latest
It’s important not to wait for eye problems to arise. A check-up every two years will help keep track of changing prescriptions, and, if you don’t wear glasses, if you may need to. The importance of eye health is second to none. At Specs, a sight test begins with a health Q and A, based around you and close relatives. Diabetes can affect the vision and be hereditary. Asking if it runs in the family is a common question posed by the optometrist, while a pressure test can help detect the disease glaucoma. This is a painless test, with a short puff of air to each eye. Regular eye exams can help identify future problems and keep your eyes in optimum health. “We’re not the old, conservative, run-of-themill opticians,” says William of Specs. “Specs is about something very unique.” Brands include Alain Mikli, Tag Heuer, Frédéric Beausoleil, Booth and Bruce (pictured) and more. Specs offer an on-site glazing service with glasses ready the same day. If you have a prescription from another optician, pop along to Specs for a pair of fashionable frames to go with your new lenses. A visit to Specs will keep your prescription up to date and keep your eyes in optimum health. Choose stylish new frames from designers including Vivienne Westwood and Diesel. Care for your eyes and discover that it doesn’t hurt to be on trend too. Specs Opticians, 22 Kensington Gardens, Brighton, 01273 676796, www.specsopticians.com
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01273 818160 If you would like to comment on this story please email editorial@thelatest.co.uk
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FASHION&BEAUTY
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Zara Baker finds added style with accessories for men and women
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Keep the rest of the outfit simple – a LBD will be fine – and let the accessories do the talking. Lime green clutch, £25, J by Jasper Conran at Debenhams.
Diamonds really are a girl’s best friend. Keep them close at hand with this gorgeous Oris Artelier Date Diamond watch (£800). It’s time to start asking for that early Christmas present. Stockists: 0800 214 582, www.oris.ch
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Guys: Embrace Autumn with a new pair of boots. These are made to last the long haul. By Timberland Boot Company, counterpane/tan, £180, available from Badger Clothing, Bond Street, Brighton.
Accentuate your features with the very best “eye jewellery.” These Chrome Heart glasses are exclusive in Brighton to Frames In The Lanes, Meeting House Lane, and cost £699.
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If you plan to splash the cash, or just want to keep it safe, make sure it’s done in style. Black FCUK wallet, £20 from French Connection Treat your feet to these patent blue shoes by Camper – Twins, Helena Alto, £100 from Badger clothing, Bond Street, Brighton. Match the colours of autumn with effortless style. Miso Croc Waist Belt, £14.99 from Republic.
Funky and quirky, make a statement in Australian brand Jono Hennessey. Exclusive in Brighton to Frames In The Lanes, Meeting House Lane, £155
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“What’s new this season” Celebrating 20 years G-star Ugg Belstaff Luke Fred Perry Gio Goi Ben Sherman Badger Clothing Ltd. 25-26 Bond Street, Brighton BN1 1RD. Telephone: Men – 01273 722245, Women – 01273 325421. 22 latest 7
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STARSTYLE Eva’s a fan of celebrity hairdresser Richard Ward and his products are now available on the high street. Create voluminous waves and definition à la Eva with Richard Ward Volume Boost and Hold, £4.99 from Superdrug and Tesco stores.
Get Hi-Shine lips for extra ‘wow’ factor. We’re loving this gloss in gorgeous pink cream, £8.50 from The Body Shop
For Eva’s prom-style outfit, head to Debenhams for a glam alternative within a budget and look every bit a princess. Debut sequin party dress, £80 from Debenhams
Cheat your way to a Hollywoodstar tan all year round with bronzing products. Try Pixi Triple Bronze Lustre for a sun-kissed glow, £24 from Asos.com
TÄÄ tuÉâà Xät As Desperate Housewives returns to our screens, Zara Baker discovers how to get Eva Longoria Parker’s star style without a star budget
Image: Copyright 2006 ABC inc. Andrew Eccles
Keep your feet neat and well looked after with Peppermint Cooling Foot Lotion, £7 from The Body Shop. Refreshing, moisturising and cooling, this is a rescue remedy for tired, aching soles.
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FASHION
Spex appeal Find unique styles at new optical boutique Frames In The Lanes Stroll through the Lanes and you can’t miss Frames in the Lanes in place of a former deli in Meeting House Lane. An eye-catching window display of unique frames makes it appear more boutique-chic than your standard optician. Spectacles have, in recent years, become more of a fashion accessory designed to make a statement. All glasses and sunglasses individually selected for Frames in the Lanes do just that. Bernadette Fitzsimons and Freya Huntley joined forces to open the
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Bernadette Fitzsimons and Freya Huntley
Alexander McQueen £229 shop over August bank (inc single vision lens) holiday; Freya’s previous optical knowledge and experience and Bernadette’s corporate background make for a strong successful partnership. When you enter Frames in the Lanes you immediately feel as if you’re somewhere a bit special. The stunning array of frames are backlit and stylish chandeliers hang from the ceiling, creating a boutique feel, a far cry from the normal endless rows of plastic shelving found elsewhere. “We planned the design and refit from scratch and wanted to create something very different in Brighton, wherever possible we used local craftsmen for the bespoke shelving and sourced most of our interior from local independent businesses,“ says Bernadette. It’s not only the décor that is different, but also the spectacles, in many cases the brands are not available outside of London. “We handselected individual pieces to get a very eclectic mix of styles, some from new designers like the Australian Jono Hennessy with his bright choice of colours and inlaid fabrics and other more established designers such as Alexander McQueen and Derek Lam, both available exclusively from us,” says Freya. The range also includes your favourite tried and tested brands such as Versace,Ray-Ban and Armani. At the top of the market is Chrome Hearts “eye jewellery,” all handmade pieces which include Sterling Silver fleur de lys, crosses, Hermes hand stitched leather and carved wood such as ebony and mahogany – “well worth coming in to see!” There are two recycled brands, for vintage style try Dead Men’s Spex made from remodelled dead men’s specs! And Linkskin, the world’s first Eco-Friendly frame – with shatterproof lenses and flexible frames. There really is something for everyone, prices start at £99 including single vision lenses (opening offer). What’s next for Frames in the Lanes? “To keep finding new and innovative brands starting in Paris in October,” says Freya. “Our aim is to keep the business new and dynamic and continue to offer fantastic customer service,” concludes Bernadette. Sight tests and repairs available on site. To book call 01273 747769 Frames in the Lanes, 12c Meeting House Lane, South lanes, Brighton, BN1 1HB. www.framesinthelanes.com
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ANDREW KAY’S FOOD&DRINK
My, my, my Andrew Kay kicks back at the stunning new myhotel
For a lover of camping holidays I have taken to smart hotels rather easily and my introduction to myhotel started at the very lovely Chelsea branch where the look is soft and genteel. Standards there were so high, that I did wonder if their new branch here in Brighton could even match it, let alone top it. Serious research needed to be done so along with a friend we checked in to check it out. I had already fully acquainted myself with both Zilli Café and Zilli restaurant. I am a regular at the café, love the salads, love the specials and would almost kill for the banana ice cream. Top dish there so far was a special, a salad of new potatoes and mussels. Sensational and with more mussel than potato.
A few hilarious hours of Eurovision madness later we returned in the hope that the restaurant would have time and a table for us. Not a problem. GG, a masterful maitre d’ found us an excellent spot, an excellent bottle of crisp white, and before long Mr H was eating black cod and I was tucking into a massive platter of griddled squid dressed with fresh mint and red chilli. Simple fare but done with great style and perfect ingredients. After a busy day it was time to retire but, heh, this was a holiday, so we slipped back into Meerkabar for a couple of cocktails before heading to the huge and very comfortable bed where we watched Jaws, for no better reason than that it was on. Exhausted by our day of fun we drifted to sleep extremely satisfied. The next morning we took things at a leisurely pace, shaving, showering and then slowly drifting down to the restaurant for breakfast. Mr H went all out with a full English, I was rather more restrained with eggs benedict, both were excellent as was the coffee. Back upstairs I reluctantly packed my toothbrush. I can see the appeal of hotel living, if only I had the budget for it. Price-wise myhotel is certainly value for money. The sense of luxury and style is everywhere except in the bill and for standards this high you would be hard to beat it on price. Being brand new the place is pretty immaculate, but that standard can only be maintained by the highest level of housekeeping and clearly that is in place. The tone of myhotel Brighton, is cool, chic, a little bit rock’n’roll, very cosmopolitan and a touch Graham Greene. In other words pure essence of Brighton. The architect’s love of curved lines and use of Eastern styling marries well with the city’s anarchic architectural style. The staff are totally accommodating but totally discreet. You certainly get the impression that what happens at myhotel stays at myhotel. I like that, I love the fact that they have embraced the fact that Brighton is Britain’s sexiest city and created a sexy hotel to match. I spend a lot of time there now and I am treated in the same way as if I were a guest with a room. They take care to remember customers’ names, their favourite drinks and foibles, and service that is worth its weight in gold. Nothing was too much trouble, they even valet parked my Noddy car for the night, although I think the poor man that drove it wore a hat and dark glasses. Recommend it to a visiting guest or treat yourself and have a night of fun there, why should the tourists get all the treats? myhotel Brighton, 17 Jubilee Street, Brighton, East Sussex, BN1 1GE. Call 01273 900 300. www.myhotels.com
China Inn is probably the first specialist MSG-free Chinese restaurant in the city. In order to ensure this all food is freshly prepared on-site with no prepackaged food bought in typically used in other establishments.There is much more to MSG-free cooking than just leaving out the ingredient! Separate Lunch, Evening and Takeaway menus. Special opening offer (Monday – Thursday only) Free bottle of house wine OR 2 bottle-beers for every eat-in set menu for 2 ordered. (please mention this advert)
“myhotel Brighton is cool, chic, a bit rock ’n’ roll, very cosmopolitan and a touch Graham Greene” In the restaurant I have eaten stunning steak, delicious scallops and amazing antipasti. We checked in mid-afternoon, found a platter of chocolate brownies, strawberries and a chocolate dip waiting for us. Mr H could not resist, I waited till later. We drifted down to have a very late lunch in the café. In holiday mood we ordered a couple of large salads and a bottle of rosé. Once again I was not disappointed, the salad selection is heavy on prime proteins and luxury ingredients and light on green padding, the wine was crisp and summery and we sat outside as the weather was good, for once. After a spot of light retail therapy we returned to the hotel and relaxed in the room. I love the décor, bright and modernistic. I think it has a touch of Barbarella, sci-fi-deluxe. In our superior room the bed sits right in the middle of the room with views over the Jubilee Library. A large crystal slowly changed colour as we sipped champagne and relaxed. The en-suite shower was big and ferocious enough to wake us before we left for cocktails and the theatre.
If you would like to comment on this story please email andrew@thelatest.co.uk
Please ring 01273 227701 for table reservations, takeaway or deliveries 7 days a week. China Inn, 68 Portland Road, Hove latest 7 25
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LATESTHOTLIST
latest hot
LIST RESTAURANTS & BARS
RESTAURANTS BRITISH AND MODERN EUROPEAN Bardsley’s Probably Brighton’s most popular fish and chip shop and restaurant with a large loyal clientele. Totally traditional and family-run with all your favourites, but also an excellent blackboard of daily fish specials. They’re open for lunch and dinner Tuesday to Saturday and it’s also a great party venue. There are massive fish platters and good seasonal seafood. Fish can be fried, grilled or poached, plus there are vegetarian choices. 22–23a Baker Street, Brighton, 01273 681256
The Coach House Friendly restaurant bar in the city centre serving an excellent range of hearty homecooked food, separate evening and lunch menus and always a selection of roasts on Sunday. Great mussels, steaks, soups and a good wine list. In the winter, a central open fire roars. In summer, people soak up the late sun on the pretty terrace. The warm atmosphere and good value pricing make this a popular local haunt. 59 Middle Street, Brighton, 01273 719000 www.coachhousebrighton.com
The Gallery Restaurant Why not appreciate for yourself the brand new restaurant in the heart of Brighton’s lanes specialising in modern British food all within in a relaxed fine dining environment. All the food is sourced locally, (where possible) homemade and designed for the seasons by our a la carte head chef who has lead at the Dorchester in London, amongst other leading London restaurants. The restaurant boasts a friendly yet casual environment that offers that little bit more all at very reasonable prices. 28 East Street, Brighton. 01273 773327 www.thegallerybrighton.co.uk
Sevendials Restaurant A smart restaurant in so many ways, excellent food and a sensible variety of menus in chic surroundings. Chef Sam runs a team of food-lovers who deliver time after time, from a simple lunch to a full à la carte dinner. Cooking reflects the seasons rather than fashion and quality is paramount, with
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See more at thelatest.co.uk Sevendials restaurant
great locally caught fish, game in season and desserts that are a delight, plus a wine list full of treats without being expensive. Make the most of the terrace when the weather is warm or the private dining room for a treat. 1 Buckingham Place, Brighton, 01273 885555, www.sevendialsrestaurant.co.uk
Sam’s of Brighton A brand new restaurant on the Kemp Town restaurant scene. Situated in the famous One Paston Place site, Sam’s offers a more relaxed dining experience. The dishes served are classic yet creative, with a focus on seasonal ingredients. Examples are natural smoked haddock and salmon fish pie with a free-range poached egg or chargrilled Scotch rib-eye steak with proper chips, plum tomato and house butter. 1 Paston Place, Brighton, 01273 676222 www.samsofbrighton.co.uk
Santiago Restaurant
Cocoa
Nestled between the two piers, Santiago Restaurant offers quality food and friendly service in this fantastic location on Brighton beach. Occupying former fisherman’s arches and boasting three of the historic, original arched windows, the first floor indoor restaurant gives a cosy and intimate dining experience. Now serving an exciting new menu of modern European dishes with a Hispanic influence and delicious homemade desserts. On sunny days, enjoy watching the world go by while dining on their sun terrace overlooking the beach, or in the evening come and relax in the indoor restaurant where every table has a sea view. 143-144 Kings Road Arches, Brighton Beach 01273 710031 www.santiagorestaurant.biz
Cocoa is the cheeky new French patisserie found just down from Brighton train station on Queen’s Road. “A slice of Paris in the heart of Brighton”. All cakes, pastries, tartines and baguettes are lovingly prepared each morning on the premises by French gourmet pastry chef Julien Plumart. Front of the house is run by Jana Solfronk serving coffee, cinnamon hot chocolate or homemade lime ice tea, amongst other beverages. Intimate seating overlooking a mural of the roofs of Paris sets an atmosphere both relaxing and bohemian. For breakfast, lunch or an afternoon “tete a tete”, Cocoa is the choice for discerning Brightonians. As commented by a recent French visitor: ”Cocoa make the best croissant in Brighton, by far better than any I found in Paris.” 48 Queen’s Road, Brighton. 01273 777412
CHINESE Gars Restaurant Stunningly refurbished, this old Brighton favourite has attained a new lease of life. An exciting menu with some great new ideas and a wholly different experience in terms of style and presentation. Smart service, beautiful interiors and a truly chic atmosphere make this one of the city’s top places to be seen. Start downstairs at the bar before rising to the upper dining room and enjoy the glamour of it all. Eat from £10. 19 Prince Albert Street, Brighton 01273 321321 www.gars.co.uk
FRENCH The Arrogant Frog Not as expensive as you might think! A tempting à la carte and Xpress lunch is available all week. A ‘Plat du Jour’, at £9.45 including a drink, is the perfect way to treat yourself without breaking the bank. Relaxed alfresco dining is available in the garden; a sunny afternoon could not be better spent. Enjoy the ‘Early Frog’ from 6-7pm; a threecourse meal at £13.95 is really the best value for your money! The true character of this delightful restaurant comes hopping to life in the evenings, and the mouthwatering menu is a comprehensive choice of the finest French cuisine. Children and families always welcome. 119 Church Road, Hove, 01273 721488, www.thearrogantfrog.com
New Steine Bistro Cosy French bistro with regular art exhibitions, creating the perfect setting for the appreciation of traditional home-made French cuisine either with friends or for a romantic night out. A hidden gem in the heart of Kemp Town, and very reasonable too! Daily evening menu at two courses £10.50, three courses £12.50 on weekdays; and two courses £14.50, three courses £16.50 on Friday and Saturday (ONLY LIMITED SPACES AVAILABLE DAILY). À la carte menu Tuesday to Saturday 6-10pm for last orders. 10-11 New Steine, Brighton, 01273 681546 or 695415
L’Église L’Église is a traditional French restaurant in Hove offering classic cuisine prepared for contemporary tastes. Offering a fantastic à la carte menu Tuesday to Sunday together with daily specials like coq au vin and côte de bœuf for two. Locally sourced produce includes freshly caught fish of the day and an extensive Anglo-French farmhouse cheeseboard. There is also a selection of superb French desserts on offer such as tarte aux pommes and crème brulée. Enjoy the south-facing sun terrace with the brasserie lunch menu, Tuesday-Sunday 12-6pm, including croque madame, tarte a l’ognion, moules marinières and more.
And with a delicious French Sunday roast, this is true entente cordiale. 196 Church Road, Hove, 01273 220868, www.legliserestaurant.co.uk, info@legliserestaurant.co.uk
INDIAN Chaula’s “The food of India, not just Indian food.” New on the scene in Lewes and unlike other Indian restaurants, Chaula’s is renowned for its signature dishes: bhindi kadhi, pista chicken, lamb rajasthani, and many more, and for its distinctive décor and friendly staff. All meals are made fresh to order and every curry has its own distinctively flavoured sauce. There is also a wide variety of vegetarian, vegan and gluten and wheat-free dishes. They have a buffet available 11am-3pm Mon-Sat, alongside a ‘light bites’ menu. It’s definitely a hot favourite with the people of Lewes! Eastgate House, 6 Eastgate street, Lewes, BN7 2LP, 01273 476707, www.chaulas.co.uk
ITALIAN Donatello The flagship venue of this local family-run business serving excellent value Italian food in stylish and spotless surroundings. It is popular with locals in the week but at the weekend it draws an audience from London. There are brilliant-value meal deals on blackboards outside – two courses £6.95, three £8.95 – as well as à la carte. The haunt of celebs in season from soap stars to politicos. Fun, friendly and fabulous value. Brighton Place, Brighton, 01273 775477, www.donatello.co.uk
Fat Leo Supposedly the budget branch of the Donatello stable but you’d be hard-pressed to see why. Once again, quality family dining in the Italian mould but a little less expensive. Popular with students and young families, Fat Leo has trendy interiors, including the toilets, and a menu which is utterly affordable with the signature setprice boards proclaiming any two courses £5.95, any three courses £7.95. 16-17 Market Street, Brighton, 01273 325135
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See more at thelatest.co.uk THAI Chokdee A premium takeaway and informal eaterie next to Hove Station where you can enjoy real Thai cooking. Chokdee serves a variety of popular Thai dishes, including tom yum soup, pad thai (stir-fried noodles) favourite red and green curries and a range of freshly stir-fried dishes, with vegetarian options. There’s a selection of home-made starters priced from £3.95. A plate of mixed starters is good value at £8.95 and includes chicken satay, Thai fishcakes, mini spring rolls and mee krob noodles. Main courses include a good selection of vegetarian, duck and seafood dishes, and are made to each individual order using authentic Thai ingredients such as holy basil, kaffir lime leaves and galangal, coconut milk and chillis. Chokdee is licensed, with wines, saké and Thai beers. Open Monday to Saturday, for lunch and in the evening. 98 Goldstone Villas, Hove 01273 720370 www.chokdeethai.co.uk
Sabai The Thai word ‘sabai’ means comfortable, relaxed and chilled – precisely the way you’ll feel when you dine or have a drink with us. Filled with stylish, genuine Thai furnishings, Sabai transports you to the beach bars of Samui or the contemporary restaurants of Bangkok. Browse our extensive menu of unique Sabai dishes, while sampling a cocktail or a bottle of wine from our comprehensive wine list. Try our gastronomic Thai food made with fresh, authentic ingredients – many of which are grown by the family of the restaurant’s owners back in Thailand. Come and enjoy – or as they say in Thailand: “Sanuk”! 165-169 Princes House, Princes Place North St, Brighton, 01273 773030 www.sabai.uk.com, bookings@sabai.uk.com
Sawadee The Thai restaurant that people love for parties and celebrations because they always give the best of times. And why not, as this well-priced restaurant pleases repeatedly with dishes we have all grown to love, and new ones too. We were impressed by the use of authentic ingredients, such as pea aubergines where others use peas. Lots of fish dishes too with bass and pomfret and a great sliced beef salad. 87 St James’s Street, Brighton, 01273 624233, www.sawadeethai.co.uk
COFFEE SHOPS Spinelli Coffee Spinelli Coffee combines the best of modern Italian café culture with great-tasting, highquality specialty coffee and mouth-watering pastries and savouries. A place where customers are attended to by a dedicated team of the very best baristas, whose driving motivation is to provide the ultimate ‘coffee experience’. Beautiful oak sliding doors look onto a heated outdoor seating area with sea views. Everyone can find a place to sit and sip, get wrapped up in a good book, take advantage of the free Wi-Fi or just relax. Spinelli Coffee is located in the heart of Kemp Town Village, just off the corner of St George’s Road and College Road. Mon-Fri 8am-6pm, Sat 8:30am-6pm, Sun 9am-5pm. Spinelli Coffee, 24 Garnet House, College Road, Brighton, 01273 818819
Moksha Caffe Brighton Moksha is Brighton’s ultimate independent café, with their own blend of locally roasted coffee made by highly trained baristas. They have an excellent range of homemade cakes and sandwiches all made on site with favourites like battenburg, quiches and gluten-free options like pistachio and orange biscotti. Moksha is not your usual high street coffee shop with its spacious interior and the works of local artists. They are child friendly, have disabled access and free WIFI. Now open late Thur/Fri/Sat offering free aperitivos with any bottle of wine and 2-4-1 cocktails from 5–7pm. Located opposite St Peters Church and only a stones’ throw away from Brighton Station. Moksha Caffe, 4-5 York Place, Brighton, 01273 248890, www.mokshacaffe.com
BRUNCH Home café Home by the arch at Queens Park, serves long, lazy brunches, delicious lunches and homemade cakes and treats. From pancake stacks dripping in maple syrup to eggs Benedict and locally roasted espresso coffee. If you've missed lunch or are in need of a late breakfast, we always have something to tempt you at Home. It's all in our name. At Home you will receive a warm welcome and quality homemade food sourced locally. We have a fully licensed bar, and make a killer bloody Mary, the perfect accompaniment to any brunch. Private parties catered for daytime and evening. Open seven days a week 10am– 5pm 32 Egremont Place, Brighton, BN2 OGA, 01273 674456 www.homebrighton.co.uk
BARS Koba Bar and Club Koba hosts a happy hour in the front bar between 5-7pm all week. With three bars over three floors and a dedicated team of mixologists, this venue stands as a flagship of quality and has been nominated in the top ten bars/clubs in the UK by The Independent. Good beers, a sensible wine list, and of course, champagne for special occasions (or just for the love of it). The perfect venue for a private party or an atmospheric night out. To book your private party, reserve your guestlist or to run through some ideas please contact: Koba, 135 Western Road, Brighton, 01273 720059, www.kobauk.com
To have an entry in the latest hot list call Marie on 01273 818150 Koba
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latest listings Your weekly guide to what’s on
16 – 22 September
Under review Here’s our round up of recent local shows, plus there’s oodles of reviews online at www.thelatest.co.uk The Space with Miranda Sawyer and Mark Borkowski This was a great Space event – controversial, varied and full of the kinds of audience members you'd like to talk to. Sawyer came across better then Borkowski, who seemed surprisingly lacking in the charisma you’d expect of a PR of his status. His anecdotes about a dog being punched, a woman being called a bull dyke and releasing live (harmless) scorpions in a TV green room were received with puzzled silences and he seemed rambling, tactless and ill-judged. By contrast, Sawyer was energetic and entertaining, telling vivacious stories about her time on Smash Hits and beyond, including meetings with Madonna and Cate Blanchett. Unlike Borkowski, she was selfdeprecating, funny and knew how to charm an audience. Latest MusicBar, 2 September ✌✌✌✌
Tricky p35
Victoria Nangle
Hannah Davis Camille
Meshuggah Swedish metal veterans Meshuggah have been around for about two decades now, but you wouldn’t guess it from tonight's impressive performance. Mixing grinding death metal with proggier numbers from new album Obzen, no other band sounds quite like them. If Obzen’s intricately woven, constantly rhythmically evolving barrage is barbed wire jabbing throughout the senses, then
Camille O’Sullivan Bringing theatricality, cabaret and a mucho cracking voice to the coving and artistry of the Dome’s concert hall was the delectable and provocative Miss Camille O’Sullivan. Covering songs from modern-day storytelling minstrels such as Nick Cave, Tom Waits and Brel, delivering them with a music hall theatricality and yet a beautiful subtlety of movement when the piece demanded it, this was a show in the true sense. Not always even as it segued from genre to genre, this was attributed to Camille’s emotional state at returning to Brighton, where her international career began and the chrysalis of her current show had been created. A wonderful night. The Dome Concert Hall, 6 September ✌✌✌✌
tonight’s high point, a brace of anthems from 1995’s seminal Destroy Erase Improve is the air raid siren followed inevitably by the bomb. Meshuggah are as potent today as they ever were – a fact proven by the swathe of Kerrang! kids looking on in awe at these masters of their craft. Concorde 2, 4 September ✌✌✌✌
My Bloody Valentine @ Bestival With an audience drenched, caked in mud and valiantly struggling to have a good time, Bestival’s Friday night line-up needs something special to save the day. Nineties shoegaze-veterans My Bloody Valentine are a somewhat acquired taste and could have been disastrous. Within seconds, any fears are dismissed as Kevin Shields and co launch into a perfect MBV set incorporating Loveless and Isn’t Anything’s sometimes ethereal, sometimes bombastic highpoints and even early EP classic ‘Slow’. An indulgent late squall of guitar feedback nearly loses the crowd, but by its screeching, howling, earbleeding conclusion everything makes beautiful sense. Full Bestival review: thelatest.co.uk/7 Isle of Wight, 5 September ✌✌✌✌✌
Nick Aldwinckle
Nick Aldwinckle
30 Comedy It’s about finding the funny side of life
30 Art A cure for nostalgia at the Brighton Media Centre
31 Stage The Best of British Variety Tour comes to Worthing
32 Film Gerard Butler talks about his role in RocknRolla
34 Events The Spirit of the Millennium Festival at Hove Town Hall
34 Books Kids’ author Rachel Wright
HOT REVIEW OF THE WEEK
35 Music Stephen Grant
Tag Comedy One of the most original concepts in comedy shows ever has returned to the Komedia after a two-year hiatus. And by golly it’s on top form. With a simple concept of four comics delivering a single impromptu set, tagging each other out when a topic an off-stage comic would like to tackle is brought up on-stage, swapping ad infinitum, this was brilliant. With the cockney attitude of Mickey
Flannigan seguing into the frenetic energy of Stephen Grant and the boisterous daring of Nick Doody swapping with the affable charm of Ian Stone, the audience is left with the best of all worlds as the comics up the ante on each other. It results in one of the best comedy shows I have ever seen. Blimming fantastic and utterly unmissable. Komedia, 4 September ✌✌✌✌✌ Victoria Nangle
For complete and comprehensive listings go to thelatest.co.uk
We look at this year’s Brighton Live
39 Music & Clubs Dates for the diary
40 Gay Will’s dreams of the tropics are dashed. Plus news and listings
42 Television Dani gears herself up for the new series of Strictly Come Dancing, plus what’s on this week
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A laughing matter Victoria Nangle looks back at the very beginning and tries to remember where to start A friend of mine is trying to put together her first-ever stand-up set. She’s not taking a comedy course or putting together a hypothetical set for fun, she just put her name down for an open spot at a local new-act night and went away for a month, hoping to discover inspiration. Nice. As the end of the month drew closer what she’d actually committed herself to started to hit her. Her mind was drawing a blank. We had a chat, although the number of beers involved in this chat probably made it counterproductive. Suffice to say, the only advice I could really give her came from the title of Stephen K Amos’ Edinburgh show: ‘Find The Funny’. When I first started trying to get together my own set, and then gather more material beyond that, the advice I was repeatedly given was: “Write it down”. Every time I said something that made someone else laugh, even if I didn’t do it on purpose, I was told to write it down. Once it’s noted, the sentence structure and the format can be played around with at leisure. The main attraction, however, will have already been caught. I will have found the funny.
“It seemed to me the offhand comments, the ones I didn’t try hard at but surprisingly provoked laughter with, were the best” The best laughs from these, according to trial audiences I tried them out on, were actually the ones I’d discovered accidentally. When I’d grumpily muttered, while having a pub heart-to-heart, that I was at my most dangerous when drunk and articulate. When I’d got cross with a man in a club for persistently and inarticulately hitting on me and enquired whether he was having fun or simply an alcoholic. Could’ve been the same night. Regardless, it seemed to me the offhand comments, the ones I didn’t try hard at but surprisingly provoked laughter with, were the best. The least laboured. Well, they worked for me. Finding the funny is one of the easiest and hardest things to do. It turns up when you least expect it (write it down!), and is whittled out of nothing through the most arduous of efforts. Watching Stephen K Amos’s show of that infamous title it was clear that he’d been finding the funny and storing it up for years. His time as a compere was clear as he bantered with the audience and picked on the front row. And he was discovering new funny all the time, interrupting himself with giggles concerning an audience suggestion he’d not heard before. My friend still has to get her set together. It’s hard putting the time to one side for it. My suggestion? Get a notebook. Find the funny. And write it down!
☺
Stand-up wisdom: “You don’t get any self-help books in Britain. You get pubs.” Rich Hall
COMEDYLISTINGS
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Brighton Coalition Comedy Hosted by Rufus Hound comes mid-week comedy fun from Mandy Knight, Benny Boot, and local favourites Paul McCaffrey and Lee Hume. The Brighton Coalition, 8pm, £4
Kronenbourg Krater Club Top-notch comedy from Mandy Knight, Dave Fulton and Andy Zaltzman, compered by Stephen Grant. Komedia, 6pm & 10pm, £16.50
Wish You Were Here Curated by Laura Krikke, ‘Wish You Were Here’ features performances by Birdengine, Benny, Diamond Family Archive and Henderson-Hyde, as well as illustrations by Man Cheung, the work of photographer Claire Griffiths and the artwork of film-maker Sally Golding. Designed to help you forget about time, Laura Krikke has curated a mix of creativity to cure any form of yearning. Having suffered from nostalgia sporadically for two and half years she selected a range of artists, film-makers and musicians whose work puts to rest the ghosts from a happy past. Wish You Were Here, Brighton Media Centre, until 1 October
BRIGHTON MEDIA CENTRE
DUKE OF YORK’S
Middle Street, Brighton Wish You Were Here A compilation of artforms designed to help you forget about time, and curated by Laura Krikke. Until 1 October, Mon–Sat 10am–5pm.
Preston Circus, Brighton Sarah Pain An exhibition of paper collage. Until 30 September, Mon-Sun, 11am–late.
BRIGHTON MUSEUM AND ART GALLERY Royal Pavilion Gardens, 01273 292882 Chinese Whispers: Chinoiserie in Britain 1650–1930 With loans from HM The Queen, national museums and private collections, ‘Chinese Whispers’ tells three centuries of stories through rare and iconic objects. Until 2 November.
BOXBIRD 14 St John’s Road, Hove, 01273 734295 New gallery space in Hove that specialises in limited-edition and original art works from illustrators, painters and printmakers. Boxbird is open sporadically throughout the year so if you wish to arrange a private viewing please contact the gallery direct on 01273 734295 or email hello@boxbird.co.uk.
Sunday 21 Friday 19 Rabbit in the Headlights See tomorrow's comedy heroes on their debut performance! Join regular compere Katy Schutte (Funny Woman finalist) each month for a great night of stand-up comedy. Upstairs at Three and Ten, 8pm, £6/5
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Terry Saunders: Sitting On A Rug Gather round, get comfortable and prepare to be amused. Terry Saunders invites fellow comics to join him for a night of anti-comedy, lo-fi and fireside chat. Upstairs at Three and Ten, 8pm, £7/5
ART LISTINGS
DE LA WARR PAVILION Bexhill-on-Sea 01424 229111 Nathan Coley Solo show from this Turner Prize-shortlisted artist, exploring our relationship to political borders and limitations, religious frontiers and ideals, and investigating how these ideas change over time. Until 21 September, Mon–Sun 10am–6pm.
HQ GALLERY 15 St John Street, Brighton, 01273 487849 Tom Benjamin: The Service of Clouds Modern landscape art. Until 5 October, Tues-Sat 10am-5pm, Sundays 1-5pm.
INK_D GALLERY 96 North Road, Brighton, 01273 645299 Stencil History X American and French stencil artists get together including C215, Sadhu, Adam5100, Kolezar and Broken Crow. Until 28 September, Mon–Sat 10am–6pm.
NAKED EYE 32 Western Road, Hove, 01273 204800 Tony Murray: Mad Day Out An exhibition of rare limited-edition Tom Murray photographs of The Beatles. Featuring a talk about The Beatles by Tom Murray, personal dedication signing, and a special prize draw. Until 30 September, 10am-6pm (except closed Tuesday, 12-4pm Sundays).
PELHAM HOUSE St Andrews Lane, Lewes Maria Kuipers Conjuring feelings of mystery and transition, Kuipers uses metaphors and symbols throughout her paintings. Until 15 October.
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Good, clean, fun The Best of British Variety Tour in Worthing for one night only A show that celebrates old fashioned British cabaret has come to Worthing. The Best of British Variety Tour 2008 has been entertaining audiences at seaside resorts up and down the country during what has been a very British summer – with perfect weather for spending the evenings inside a theatre. Among those appearing in Worthing is Jimmy Cricket, the much-loved comedian. Jimmy told Latest 7 it would be like a pantomime with something for all ages – and definitely suitable for children. He said: “I think it is going to be an eclectic mix. It is a family show. It is like a panto. All the humour’s basically clean. All the youngsters will be there, right through to granny and grandad.” Jimmy said he was put off by modern comedians who don’t keep their acts clean. “I go to comedy clubs. They swear a little bit. I feel a lot of the younger people remember me in the 80s so I am in their DNA. They can still allow me to be myself. I see the guys swearing and effing and blinding.” Instead he prefers acts such as Tim Vine and Harry Hill. Jimmy said: “He’s brilliant, Harry Hill. They’re not smutty, they’re clean as a whistle.” Today’s comedians, he said, are also likely to talk more about their personal lives – something unheard of in the past. “What I am amazed about comedy clubs is they bare their souls when they come along. One guy talks about losing his father to cancer. I think it may be a therapeutic thing.” Jimmy prefers more traditional visual comedy, such as Monty Python’s Ministry of Silly Walks and Laurel and Hardy. Asked to tell a joke, he replied: “I’m a bit worried about this global warming, I think it’s worse than we thought. I bought a packet of Fox’s Glacier Mints the other day, when I got them home, they were melted.”
STAGELISTINGS
Tuesday 16 Sept to Monday 13 October BRIGHTON DOME 01273 709709 www.brightondome.org Don’t Let the Pigeon Stay Up Late Sequel to Don’t Let the Pigeon Drive the Bus! For ages 3+ • 19–20 Sept, 4.30pm Fri, 11am, 1pm and 3pm Sat, £5 Circus Oz – 30th Birthday Bash Australia’s premiere circus ensemble get set to thrill. • 24–26 Sept, 7.30pm, £12–£24 Angika Dance Company • 26 Sept, 8pm, £10/8. Corn Exchange Two Lovers Together Clinging • 26 Sept, 7.30pm, £3 Bye George! • 3–4 Oct, 7pm, £7/5 Brighton Philharmonic Orchestra • 5 Oct, 2.45pm, £8–£30, Concert Hall Dear Body – Protein Dance Over 16s only. • 7–8 Oct, 8pm, £10–£15
CHICHESTER FESTIVAL THEATRE 01243 781312 www.cft.org.uk Calendar Girls An uplifting story with a very English heart. Based on the motion picture. • 16–20, 22–27 Sept, £11–£33, 7.30pm, (7pm
16 Sept) 2pm mat 13, 18, 20, 25, 27 Sept Aristo • 16–20, 22–27, 29 Sept–4 Oct, 4, 6–11 Oct, please call for times, SOLD OUT Funny Girl/Funny Boy Minerva Theatre • 4 Oct, 11am, £5/£3
EASTBOURNE: CONGRESS THEATRE 01323 412000 www.eastbournetheatres.co.uk Russian Classical Ballet • 30 September, 7.30pm, £20–£25 The Syd Lawrence Orchestra – Simply Big Band • 1 October, 7.30pm, £16.50/15.50 Eastbourne Symphony Orchestra’s Music from the Movies Concert + Tchaikovsky Piano Concert • 5 October, 7.30pm, £12/10 Our House • 7–11 Oct, 7.30pm, 2.30pm mat Thu and Sat, £12.50–£26.50 London Philharmonic Orchestra • 12 Oct, 3pm, £12–£28
If you would like to comment on these stories please email andrew@thelatest.co.uk
Jimmy Cricket began his career by reaching the finals of TV’s Search for a Star competition in 1981. He was known for his catchphrases; ‘c’mere’ and ‘...and there's more’ and his distinctive outfit: cut-off trousers; tuxedo; hat and wellies marked ‘L’ and ‘R’ – always on the wrong feet. In 1986, he landed his own TV series on Central Television called And There’s More, which ran for three years. He also had his own radio series for Radio 2, Jimmy’s Cricket Team, from 1991 to 1995. He is a stalwart on the pantomime circuit, performing in over 17 so far. Jimmy has recently written a musical about the woes of a struggling lower division football team called Give Me One Good Season. Also appearing in the Best of British Variety Tour 2008, hosted by Frank Carson, are: Paul Daniels; The Krankies; Cannon and Ball and 70s chart sensations Brotherhood of Man. Best of British Variety Tour 2008, Worthing Pavilion Theatre, Tuesday 16 September, 7.30pm. Tickets £22.50 or £25 with £1 fee per ticket for all card bookings. Tickets from www.worthingtheatres.co.uk, in person at the Pavilion or Connaught box offices by phoning 01903 206206.
EASTBOURNE: DEVONSHIRE PARK THEATRE 01323 412000 www.eastbournetheatres.co.uk Anything Goes Eastbourne Stagers’ musical • 16–20 September, 7.30pm, plus Thu and Sat mat 2.30pm, £8.50–£11.50 Gotta Sing, Gotta Dance • 23–25 and 27 September, 7.45pm, plus 2.30pm matinee Wed and Sat, £13.50–£18 The Glass Menagerie • 29 Sept–4 Oct, 7.45pm, plus 2.30pm matinee Wed and Sat, £10–£21 One for the Pot • 7–11 Oct, 7.45pm plus 2.30pm Wed and Sat, £13.50–£19.50 Murder with Love • 13–18 Oct, 7.45pm plus 2.30pm Wed and Sat, £13.50–£19.50
THE MARLBOROUGH THEATRE 07782 278 521 www.marlboroughtheatre.co.uk The Miss Hope Springs Show • 21 and 28 Sept, 9pm, £3
• 22–27 Sept, 7.45pm, 2.30pm Thu and Sat, £17–£27 My Brilliant Divorce • 28 Sept, 7.30pm, £16–£18 All the Fun of the Fair • 6–11 Oct, 7.45pm plus 2.30pm Wed and Sat. £17.50–£29.50
WORTHING: ASSEMBLY HALL 01903 206206 www.worthingtheatres.co.uk Last Night of the Proms • 27 Sept, 7.30pm, £8–£15 The Mighty Wurlitzer Theatre Organ • 28 Sept, 7.30pm, £8–£12
WORTHING: CONNAUGHT THEATRE 01903 206206 www.worthingtheatres.co.uk Murder with Love Thriller with plenty of red herrings, starring Leslie ‘Dirty Den’ Grantham. • 16–20 Sept, 7.30pm, plus 2pm Wed, 2.30pm Sat, £13–£22 We’re Going on a Bear Hunt • 26–28 Sept, 2pm and 4.30pm Fri, 10.30am and 2pm Sat, 2pm and 4.30pm Sun, £10
WORTHING: PAVILION THEATRE THEATRE ROYAL 08700 606650 www.theambassadors.com/theatreroyal Le Grand Cirque Award-winning acrobatics. • 16–20 Sept, 7.45pm, 2.30pm Thu and Sat, £14–£24 Enjoy
01903 206206 www.worthingtheatres.co.uk The Best of British Variety Show 2008 • 16 Sept, 7.30pm, £22.50/25 Puppetry of the Penis Adult comedy. • 17 Sept, 8pm, £12.50–£15.50 Mikado • 24–27 Sept, 7.30pm,2.30pm Wed/Sat, £12/10
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FILM 1himself. Following the recent death of his own daughter www.odeon.co.uk
0871 224 4007 Tuesday 16
Thursday 18
THE DARK KNIGHT (12A) 8.45 CARAMEL (PG) 9.00 DISASTER MOVIE (12A) 2.00, 4.15, 6.30 THE DUCHESS (12A) 2.30, 5.30, 8.00 HELLBOY II: THE GOLDEN ARMY (12A) 2.00, 6.30 MAMMA MIA! (PG) 3.30, 5.45, 8.15 PINEAPPLE EXPRESS(15) 2.45, 5.45, 8.30 ROCKNROLLA (15) 3.30, 6.10, 8.50 SOMERS TOWN (15) 2.00 STEP BROTHERS (15) 4.25 THE STRANGERS (15) 6.45, 9.00 THE WOMEN (12A) 2.10, 5.45, 8.30 WALL-E (U) 2.15, 4.30
THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA: PRINCE CASPIAN (PG) 10.30 THE DARK KNIGHT (12A) 8.45 DISASTER MOVIE (12A) 2.00, 4.15, 6.30 THE DUCHESS (12A) 2.30, 5.30, 8.00 MAMMA MIA! (PG) 3.30, 5.45 MAMMA MIA! SINGALONG (PG) 8.15 PINEAPPLE EXPRESS(15) 2.45, 5.45, 8.30 ROCKNROLLA (15) 3.30, 6.10, 8.50 SOMERS TOWN (15) 2.00 THE STRANGERS (15) 6.45, 9.00 TROPIC THUNDER (15) 2.00, 4.15, 6.30, 9.00 THE WOMEN (12A) 2.10, 5.45, 8.30 WALL-E (U) 2.15, 4.30
Wednesday 17
L7 lowdown New releases reviewed
Films showing Friday 19-Monday 22
DISASTER MOVIE (12A) 2.00, 4.15, 6.30 THE DUCHESS (12A) 2.30, 5.30, 8.00 MAMMA MIA! (PG) 3.00, 5.45, 8.15 PINEAPPLE EXPRESS(15) 2.45, 5.45, 8.30 ROCKNROLLA (15) 3.30, 6.10, 8.50 SOMERS TOWN (15) 2.00 STEP BROTHERS (15) 9.00 THE STRANGERS (15) 6.45, 9.00 TROPIC THUNDER (15) 2.00, 4.15, 6.30, 9.00 THE WOMEN (12A) 2.10, 5.45, 8.30 WALL-E (U) 2.15, 4.30
DEATH RACE (15) DISASTER MOVIE (12A) THE DUCHESS (12A) PINEAPPLE EXPRESS(15) ROCKNROLLA (15) STEP BROTHERS (15) TROPIC THUNDER (15) THE WOMEN (12A) CHECK WITH CINEMA TO CONFIRM FILMS/TIMES
www.picturehouses.co.uk
01273 626261 Tuesday 16
Saturday 20
THE BOY IN THE STRIPED PYJAMAS (12A) 2.00, 4.00, 6.00, 8.30
GREYFRIARS BOBBY(PG) 11.00 LGFF: BREAKFAST WITH SCOT (18) 1.30 THE BOY IN THE STRIPED PYJAMAS (12A) 4.00, 6.00, 8.30
Wednesday 17 THE BOY IN THE STRIPED PYJAMAS (12A) 11.00, 2.00, 4.00, 6.00, 8.30
Sunday 21
Thursday 18
7 Selects
Tropic Thunder (15) Dir: Ben Stiller Stiller and his thrifty comic cohorts take the archetypal American war film and rip it to glorious shreds. With Stiller taking the lead the story follows a film crew making a war movie who get dropped into a real-life war zone. Joining Stiller, aka Hollywood action star Tug Speedman, are Jack Black as perennial funny
man Jeff ‘Fatty’ Portnoy and Robert Downey Jr in a scene-stealing turn as Oscar superstar Kirk Lazarus. Chuck in granite-faced Nick Nolte, Steve Coogan as an English director, and a host of fake trailers and you have a film that is explosive from start to finish. Showing Cineworld, Odeon, Worthing Craig Driver
THE BOY IN THE STRIPED PYJAMAS (12A) 2.00, 4.00, 6.00, 8.30
THE BOY IN THE STRIPED PYJAMAS (12A) 2.00, 4.00, 6.00, 8.30
Monday 22
Friday 19
THE BOY IN THE STRIPED PYJAMAS (12A) 2.00, 4.00, 6.00, 8.30
THE BOY IN THE STRIPED PYJAMAS (12A) 2.00, 4.00, 6.00, 8.30 LGFF: OTTO (18) 11.00pm
CHECK WITH CINEMA TO CONFIRM FILM TIMES
www.cineworld.co.uk
0871 200 2000 Tuesday 16
Thursday 18
THE BOY IN THE STRIPED PYJAMAS (12A) 12.30, 3.10, 5.50, 8.20 THE DARK KNIGHT (12A) 8.50 THE DUCHESS (12A) 12.20, 3.00, 5.40, 8.30 DISASTER MOVIE (12A) 12.10, 2.20, 4.30, 6.40 HELLBOY II: THE GOLDEN ARMY (12A) 1.20 MADE OF HONOR (12A) 11.00 MAMMA MIA!(PG) 12.40, 3.20, 6.00, 8.40 PINEAPPLE EXPRESS(15) 1.00, 3.40, 6.20, 9.10 ROCKNROLLA (15) 1.30, 4.10, 6.50, 9.30 STEP BROTHERS (15) 4.00, 9.20 THE WOMEN (12A) 12.50, 3.30, 6.10, 9.00
THE BOY IN THE STRIPED PYJAMAS (12A) 12.30, 3.10, 5.50, 8.20 THE DARK KNIGHT (12A) 8.50 THE DUCHESS (12A) 12.20, 3.00, 5.40, 8.30 DISASTER MOVIE (12A) 12.10, 2.20, 4.30, 6.40 HELLBOY II: THE GOLDEN ARMY (12A) 1.20 MAMMA MIA!(PG) 12.40, 3.20, 6.00, 8.40 PINEAPPLE EXPRESS(15) 1.00, 3.40, 6.20, 9.10 ROCKNROLLA (15) 1.30, 4.10, 6.50, 9.30 STEP BROTHERS (15) 9.20 THE WOMEN (12A) 12.50, 3.30, 6.10, 9.00 TROPIC THUNDER (15) 11.30, 1.45, 4.05, 6.30, 8.50
Wednesday 17
Films showing Friday 19–Monday 22
THE BOY IN THE STRIPED PYJAMAS (12A) 12.30, 3.10, 5.50, 8.20 THE DARK KNIGHT (12A) 8.50 THE DUCHESS (12A) 12.20, 3.00, 5.40, 8.30 DISASTER MOVIE (12A) 12.10, 2.20, 4.30, 6.40 HELLBOY II: THE GOLDEN ARMY (12A) 1.20 MAMMA MIA!(PG) 12.40, 3.20, 6.00, 8.40 PINEAPPLE EXPRESS(15) 1.00, 3.40, 6.20, 9.10 ROCKNROLLA (15) 1.30, 4.10, 6.50, 9.30 STEP BROTHERS (15) 9.20 THE WOMEN (12A) 12.50, 3.30, 6.10, 9.00 TROPIC THUNDER (15) 11.30, 1.45, 4.05, 6.30, 8.50
THE BOY IN THE STRIPED PYJAMAS (12A) DEATH RACE (15) DISASTER MOVIE (12A) THE DUCHESS (12A) MAMMA MIA!(PG) PINEAPPLE EXPRESS(15) ROCKNROLLA (15) TROPIC THUNDER (15) CHECK WITH CINEMA TO CONFIRM FILM TIMES
Breakfast With Scot (18)
Dir: Laurie Lynd This Canadian effort is a further addition to the 22nd London Lesbian and Gay Film Festival. The film focuses on a young gay boy, Scot, who moves in with his gay uncle and partner after the death of his mother. Equal parts comedy and tragedy this is a refreshing take on the family comedy. When 11-year-old Scot arrives he comes armed with a duffel bag containing one pink musical hairbrush, two plastic containers of beads, a pink poodle belt, and four pairs of white sock-ettes. Camp doesn’t cover it. Showing at Duke of York’s
Otto (18)
Dir: Bruce La Bruce This German/Canadian film is showing as part of the 22nd London Lesbian and Gay Film Festival on tour. LaBruce – responsible for such gay porn shorts as Give Piece of Ass a Chance and the somewhat lopsided broadside at terrorist chic that was
The Raspberry Reich – this time round opts for a gay zombie pornodocumentary. The film follows Otto, a gay zombie, as he struggles to adapt to his newly found hunger for human flesh. An oddity that just never stops giving this is wildly irreverent stuff. Showing at Duke of York’s
The Women (12A)
Dir: Diane English This frothy excuse of a film follows a group of middle-aged women headed by a trout-pouted Meg Ryan. Joining the onset of nausea are the usually excellent Annette Bening, Will and Grace nitwit Debra Messing, Eva Mendes, Jada Pinkett Smith, Bette Midler and Carrie Fisher. The story itself revolves around Meg Ryan as she leaves her cheating husband and as a result bonds with other middle class socialites. This is a stink of a film that barely stops to gaze beyond its own botoxed navel. Showing at Cineworld and Odeon Craig Driver
WORTHING CINEMA 01903 206206 www.worthingtheatres.co.uk Tues 16-Thurs 18 September
Sat 20 September
THE DUCHESS (12A) 2.30 (Weds), 8.00
JOURNEY TO THE CENTRE OF EARTH (PG)10.15
Fri 19-Mon 22 September
Mon 22 September
TROPIC THUNDER (15) 2.15 (Sat,Sun), 5.00, 8.00
THE EDGE OF LOVE (15) 2.00 CHECK WITH CINEMA TO CONFIRM FILM TIMES
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to rely on my personality, that’s not something I'm very good at.
Meet the Spartan Then, you can trust that you have a director who knows exactly what he wants, but he’s going to let you do what you want. There was a natural flow that we all got into, as we hung out and spent time together. The script had a rhythm, and he really understands that, but at the same time, he just lets it happen and interjects when it’s necessary. That’s what’s great about the movie. It has this flow and rhythm that’s in the script, and you just have to learn to trust that. He’s the master director.
Working with Guy Ritchie, who has such a specific sensibility, what it like? You know it’s full of boys quipping jokes, you know like ripping the piss out of each other. And then you’ve got Guy Ritchie with a script that’s hilarious. I mean, you can’t wait for these scenes to start because you know you’re going to have a blast together. So it was kind of like that. It’s kind of different for me. You do movies that are so intense and then you do a… Now this was intense because of the kind of stuff that you're pulling off. It’s a blast, you know? It’s a lot of action but it’s a comedy. It’s a lot of dialogue. It’s a lot of personality and character. It’s Guy Ritchie. It’s not all action. It’s kind of got a mix of all of those things and that’s why it’s great because you know people are climbing into you and the boys and relationships and fun, and the trouble you get yourself into. That’s what he does best. Genius.
This is a bit of a change for you. In 300 you had a beard but no clothes – how was it working in your own skin? I know, it’s weird, huh? I feel a little bit naked, even though in 300 I was actually naked – and my face, I had my beard: my shield. In this I don’t have any of that. I have
And does Guy really count down each scene for you… 5, 4, 3, 2, 1? Oh, you heard about that? I’d never… I tell other directors now, “You want to get a move on? Just start shouting out ‘5, 4, 3, 2, 1’, because I’ll tell you what, no matter what, they'll be ready.” It’s kind of insane.
Latest 7 talks to Gerard Butler about his role in new Guy Ritchie film RocknRolla So tell us about your new role in RocknRolla. My name is One Two and I’m part of the gang. Myself, Idris and Tom Hardy are small-town crooks who, at the start of the movie, are actually trying to do something that is almost legitimate, and get screwed over by the more native boss, who sees us as immigrants, which I suppose we are, in a way. We spend the rest of the movie trying to make that up, and trying to cover our asses, and messing with the Russians, who then start blaming other people, so then it quickly becomes that irresistible Guy Ritchie movie. What, for you, is so special about Guy Ritchie’s style? What I love about Guy is that name. It’s in your soul. He’s an institution. And, suddenly, you’re there and working with him. What surprised me was how easygoing he was.
Also showing… A quick look at what’s on this week The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian (PG) Dir: Andrew Adamson The Pevensie children return to Narnia one Earth year and hundreds of Narnian years later to join the deposed Prince Caspian’s fight to regain his country’s throne. Eddie Izzard voices valiant mouseketeer Reepicheep, The Station Agent‘s Peter Dinklage and everyone’s favourite ewok Warwick Davis turn up as dwarves Trumpkin and Nikabrik and, of course, honeyvoiced Liam Neeson returns as good old Aslan. Showing at Odeon The Dark Knight (12A) Dir: Christopher Nolan Christopher Nolan returns to helm the sequel to his stunning super-hero reboot Batman Begins with Heath Ledger creeping out Christian Bale, in the role he’ll be remembered for as none other than Batman’s arch-nemesis The Joker. A stellar cast bolsters proceedings with Michael Caine as butler Alfred, Aaron Eckhart as conflicted DA Harvey Dent, Gary Oldman as Chief Gordon and Maggie Gyllenhaal as love interest Rachel Dawes. Showing at Odeon and Cineworld
Hellboy II: The Golden Army (12A) Dir: Guillermo Del Toro Mike Mignola’s cult comic book anti-hero makes a welcome return to the big screen. Looking to continue the trend of big-budget super-folk blockbusters getting better by the second film, The Golden Army pits Big Red (Ron Perlman), Liz (Selma Blair) and Abe Sapien (Pan’s Labyrinth’s Doug Jones) against a whole horde of mythical beasties. With the huge success of Mexican director Del Toro’s fantasy horror Pan’s Labyrinth, he’s been given free reign for his impressively out-there imagination to run wild. Del Toro’s set to direct the eagerly anticipated film versions of The Hobbit, so catch an early glimpse here of his take on mythology. Showing at Odeon and Cineworld Mamma Mia! (PG) Dir: Phyllida Lloyd A young woman searches for her real father while singing along to ‘Dancing Queen’, ‘Mamma Mia’ and other hits by Swedish super-troopers Abba. Meryl Streep plays the kookie mum with Colin Firth, Stellan
Skarsgård and Pierce Brosnan as the potential dads. The long-running and everpopular stage musical finally makes its way onto the big screen. Showing at Cineworld and Odeon Pineapple Express (15) Dir: David Gordon Green Knocked Up and Superbad star Seth Rogen continues his ascent to the big-screen geek hero above all others in this stoner-actionbuddy-comedy. Rogen plays waster Dale with Spiderman brooder James Franco as his dealer Saul, admirably playing against type in madcap fashion. When Dale witnesses a murder, he and Saul go on the run, providing an interesting spin on the action genre all the way. Showing at Odeon and Cineworld RocknRolla (12A) Dir: Guy Ritchie The one time hot young property of Brit cinema has weathered a tide of criticism following his marriage to Madge and the massive flops Swept Away and Revolver, so Guy Ritchie’s got a lot to prove with this return. Back on familiar Lock, Stock cockney underworld territory, Ritchie once again gathers a decent ensemble cast including Scots beefcake Gerard Butler, an almost unrecognisable Tom Wilkinson and The Wire’s Idris Elba in this Nuts-friendly crime caper. Showing at Odeon and Cineworld
Wall*E (U) Dir: Andrew Stanton Pixar hit paydirt again with this lovingly rendered cross between 70s eco-sci-fi Silent Running and ET: The Extra-Terrestrial. The CGIanimation giants could have easily opted for another rerun of the cutesy Toy Story formula, but instead go for this admittedly still cutesy, but ultimately meditative love story. Ben Burtt voices the titular cleaning robot (though there’s barely a word) charged with sorting out a polluted Earth after humanity’s jumped ship. Showing at Odeon The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas (12A) Dir: Mark Herman Based on John Boyne’s novel this wartime effort is an original but occasionally sentimental effort. Set during World War II, this is a film shown through the eyes of Bruno, the eight-year-old son of the commandant at a concentration camp, whose friendship with a Jewish boy reveals a startling but desperate message. Asa Butterfield is superb as young Bruno and the film as a whole is a deft British dissection of the more tender issues of war. Showing at Duke of York’s and Cineworld
Nick Aldwinckle
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latest music ★ artists ★ interviews ★ gigs ★ new releases ★ clubs ★ djs ★ chart ★
NEWS
Brighton Live
Skandalous Circus2Iraq was founded by Jo Wilding with a view to raising money and funding projects in war-torn and poverty stricken areas around the globe. For instance, they’ve helped Happy Family, an exiled Iraqi refugee clown group based in Cairo, and the Children of Bethany in East Jerusalem. They’ve also tried to spread a little happiness in Palestine and Jordan and are hoping to go to Kurdistan soon. This week they are holding a spectacular fundraiser featuring the Dreadzone Soundsystem, Bad Science, Slacker Convention DJs, Subgiant, Top Banana, Roadkill Cabaret, badger racing and tonnes of other entertainment. Run away to the circus and make a difference! Skandalous: A Circus2Iraq benefit, Friday 19 September, Coalition. www.circus2ira1.org
Early Music The forthcoming Brighton Early Music Festival have organised a free folk and family day in Adelaide Crescent Gardens (Brunswick pub if weather decrees!) on Sunday 21 September, 2–6pm. Featuring live music and dancing, and open air ceilidh with live band and caller, tea and cakes and a beer tent, this is a taster for the festival which will be blurring the boundaries between folk and classical music. www.bremf.org.uk
XYZ Local magazine XYZ are organising a monthly music industry night and all DJs, labels, bands, artists, promoters, managers, and anyone connected with music are invited. Check www.xyzmagazine.co.uk for more details. Wednesday 17 September, Coalition.
Brighton Live returns for its fifth year, showcasing Brighton musical talent for free Recent Emergenza winners Gloria Cycles, festival flirts Floors and Walls, the hotly tipped Transformer, minimalist punk-folk trio Drookit Dogs and bluesy post-punkers Sweet Sweet Lies are just a few of the artists topping the bill at this year’s event. which takes place at a number of venues between 23–27 September, and all events are free. This year Brighton Live will take in three key areas of the city, with colour coded ‘festival zone’ maps to make it easier for you to find your way around the city. Last year’s event saw over 20,000 music fans flock to the sell-out concerts, jam packed free shows and a host of panels, seminars and workshops. Over 250 bands (with around 1000 artists) performed at nearly 100 free gigs in over 30 venues across the city. Brighton Live sees many of the key Brighton bands, promoters, labels and music industry professionals working together to put on Brighton’s most established annual music festival and firm champion of the city’s burgeoning music scene. Local schools, Blatchington Mill, Worthing High, Chichester College and Central Sussex College, Haywards Heath, have been taking part in a Battle of the Bands competition to win a place on the bill for this year’s hotly anticipated Brighton Live. Saturday will also see an afternoon showcase of the Best of Brighton Live at Audio. Each year Brighton Live introduces a new genre; this year focusing on African and world music. Confirmed so far for the Unitarian Church include jazz-funk flautist Lawrence Jones and Arabic Soul Hip-Hop performer Rahma Ali, there will also be music from African Night Fever! The Festival Club will be venue hopping this year with Club NMW, Artrocker magazine and The Fly hosting one-off events. The club offers an informal meeting place where the festival’s
performing artists, their guests and invited members of the music industry and media can relax over a drink after the night’s performances have finished. This venue will not be open to the public. Brighton Live, 23–27 September. www.brightonlive.net
Brighton Live competition Courtesy of Brighton Live and Asahi Beer, Latest 7 has a pair of VIP passes to the Brighton Live launch party (23 September) and festival clubs which are hosted by Club NME (Wed), Artrocker (Thurs) and The Fly (Fri). The winner will also receive an Asahi iPod with Bose headphones, packed with tracks from top Brighton bands who are of course playing at this year’s Brighton Live, plus other Asahi merchandise and a case of 24 Asahi beers. To enter all you need to do is write to Brighton Live competition, c/o Latest 7, Unit 1, Level 5, New England House, New England Street, Brighton BN1 4GH enclosing a daytime telephone number. Entries must be received by Monday 21 September and the winner will be notified the same day.
UPCOMING GIGS
Tricky Former Massive Attack and Martina Topley-Bird collaborator is back at his spliffed-up paranoid best. Friday 3 October, De La Warr Pavilion, Bexhill-on-Sea, 01424 229111
If you would like your event listed please email listings@thelatest.co.uk
British Sea Power 2 October, Corn Exchange Tricky 3 October, De La Warr Pavilion Sam Sparro 3 October, Corn Exchange Art Garfunkel 6 October, Dome Seasick Steve 7 October, Dome Stephen Stills 10 October, Brighton Centre Moody Blues 11 October, Brighton Centre Cajun Dance Party 13 October, Concorde 2 Does It Offend You 20 October, Concorde 2 Dr John 21 October, Dome Martha Wainwright 25 Oct, St Georges Ch. The Hoosiers 25 October, Brighton Centre Lambchop 29 October, St Georges Church Level 42 30 October, Dome Hot Chip 5 November, Dome Motorhead 6 November, Dome Scouting For Girls 3 Nov, Brighton Centre
Steve Winwood 10 November, Dome Mercury Rev 11 Nov, Corn Exchange Feeder 11 November, Dome Katie Melua 11 November, Brighton Centre Cardiacs 17 November, Komedia Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds 23 November, Brighton Centre Nouvelle Vague 24 November, Corn Exchange Leonard Cohen 28 November,Brighton Centre Primal Scream 2 December, Dome Will Young 4 December, Dome Human League 5 December, Brighton Centre Jools Holland 6 December, Brighton Centre Neville Staple 6 December, Concorde 2 Joan As Policewoman 7 Dec, Concorde 2 Status Quo 12 December, Brighton Centre Maddy Prior 15 December, Hove Centre
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CLUBS
MUSIC
Jaime ‘til dawn
Los Albertos
Jaime Pettit experiences stripped-back clubbing at Supercharged’s ninth birthday at Concorde 2
Bob Log III + King Size Slim and D-66 This resident of Tucson, Arizona is perhaps the maddest bluesman around. Mixing Mississippi Delta blues with the odd dance or hip-hop beat and bursts of punk energy, even one Tom Waits seems mildly confused. One of a kind and unmissable. Wednesday 17 September, Engine Room Platforms Magazine: Peter and the Wolf + Alessi + The Bobby McGee’s + Planet Earth Peter and the Wolf borrow a little of Beirut’s haunting folk/soul sound and mix it with a bit of gospel harmonising, plus there’s great support from talented local mentalists The Bobby McGee’s. Wednesday 17 September, The Hope Eileen Rose & The Holy Wreck Marvellous American country blues rocker with four albums under her belt, a bit like a more earthy Sheryl Crow. Expect a talented band in tow – all fine musicians. Wednesday 17 September, Komedia
The Trachtenburg Family Slideshow Players The crazies are certainly hitting town this week. Cue this New York City family trio (mom, pop and 12-year-old girl in tow) who have worked with the likes of Daniel Johnston
Simon Finn with Joolie Wood and Karl Blake + Elizabeth Walling + Birdengine This semi-legendary psyche-folk veteran has had a bit of a resurgence in interest lately, with a legion of famous fans including Thurston Moore singing his praises. This nicely intimate gig for the Canadian Finn should sell out rapidly. Friday 19 September, Red Roaster Van Morrison Making his yearly pilgrimage to Brighton is the increasingly evangelical Morrison who has decide to ban the sale of the devil’s brew for this show. Unnecessary, don’t you think? As are the staggering prices: £40 for a restricted view up to £105. Friday 19 September, Dome Los Albertos + Big Red Ass Upbeat ska and party-flavoured grooves from one of the most original bands around. After a relentless series of festivals this summer, the band are close to releasing their third album. Support comes form their Hampshire buddies Big Red Ass. Saturday 20 September, Brunswick
Photos by: Ben Griffiths@Supercharged, Concorde 2
Hey Negrita Described as a twisted cross between Johnny Cash and The Rolling Stones, this lot blend raw Americana with old school British rock’n’roll. The band will also be showing their film We Dreamed America, a documentary that offers an insight into the inspirations behind a new breed of British musicians fascinated by American music. Wednesday 17 September, Komedia
and play mad, apparently un-ironic, Brady Bunch-esque pop. Has to be seen, really. Thursday 18 September, The Hope
I’m limping round work like a penguin with a sore foot and I see it in their faces, a lack of need to ask. Only a mammoth night of debauchery would leave Jaime so wounded. First rule of clubbing: the best nights hurt. Us who face the vertical challenge rarely battle through thighs and hips for the danger of taking out a nose, but in a diva flash greater than Lily Allen, I had to be at the front. Supercharged had laid on their thickest rug of people and weaving wasn’t easy. However it was worth every physical pain. I could even excuse the loss of my shoe’s sole to the bouncing size nines. Each time Krafty Kuts dropped a tune I was like an eight-year-old at Typhoon Lagoon, taking every brutal bash of the six-foot wave of bass. Nuzzling in the bare sweaty crevices of strangers, hailing the brave few who charged for 15 seconds of stage glory and unmoved by the fact that not even GHDs could save my hair now. The only pain I lived to regret was the overenthusiastic bashing of my knee when thrusting my body about. Freestylers were up next… Moving on. Deekline muscled in on the decks as I made my way back through the rug. Momentarily stopping for a brief encounter with Aussie Jess as we talked Round the Twist over the odd limb jutting. I had planned to pen a ranting paragraph at least on the lack of toilets, but it appears a great secret lurks behind the third room – oodles of cubicles and little wait time! A cave of treasures, so I retract my original pensioner grumblings. Concorde 2 is like the leftovers of a Viking feast. With the meat torn away, like fancy décor and other such shiny distractions, it concentrates on exposing the bare bones of clubbing: space, people, music and sound quality. Tonight was nothing but a no-frills breaks-and-bass sweatfest. Simple. Sweet.
Paul Curreri Other half of Devon Sproule, Curreri doesn’t go on about his other half quite as much (stop it already, Devon), but then again he doesn’t quite have her way with a melody. Then again, when he’s on form, he’s one hell of a songwriter – intuitive and subtle. Sunday 21 September, Pavilion Theatre
THE CHILLI FESTIVAL 2 COURSES AND A GLASS OF WINE
THE BRASSERIE FISH & GRILL 3A The Waterfront, Brighton Marina Village, Brighton BN2 5WA 01273 698989 Bookings must be made in advance. Please mention this advert when booking. Terms and conditions: Must bring the coupon to claim – one coupon up to six people. Excludes Bank Holidays and Saturday evenings.
36 latest 7
Sat 20th & Sun 21st September, 11am–5pm Old Steine, Brighton, inc Saturday evening National Chilli Awards
Spicy Foods from around the World Chilli Market Hot Live Bands Live Chilli Food Stage National Chilli Awards
(Sat eve only) tickets on sale on the day Adults £2.50 Children/Concessions £1
2 COURSES AND A GLASS OF WINE
LATIN IN THE LANE 10–11 Kings Road, Brighton East Sussex BN1 1NE 01273 328672 Bookings must be made in advance. Please mention this advert when booking. Terms and conditions: Must bring the coupon to claim – one coupon up to six people. Excludes Bank Holidays and Saturday evenings.
If you would like your event listed please email listings@thelatest.co.uk
037_LS390 music_reviews jeff
9/11/08
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MUSIC REVIEWS A weekly review of local and national releases Wall of noise vets Mogwai aren’t exactly progressing beyond their template of densely layered, epic, slow moving and extremely loud instrumental music. But that’s what Mogwai are, and some people love ‘em for it. They come pretty darn close to replicating their thrilling live sound here with The Hawk Is Howling, another loud and occasionally bombastic offering built around repetitive motifs. Sometimes these precious Mogwai column inches are devoted to reviews of at least ‘good’ material. But every now and then there’s this itch, this desire to lash out for no good reason bar one’s pertaining to ego. And so, sorry guys, Euros Child is getting it this time around… This former lead singer of an unpronounceable Welsh language band continues to unleash dire, inadequate and wholly unfit music for general consumption. Cheer Gone is the latest collection of childlike strummings. There, it’s done. Actually, I haven’t finished yet… trip hopping ambient freak Howie B has deconstructed and remixed Italian faves Casino Royale on Not in the Face. The results are utterly devoid of anything meaningful beyond the stupefied dope smoking brigade in awe of a few echoes, heavy dub and glitchy electronics. Ridiculous. Folk poet Nick Burbridge has been making music and writing poetry for many years, often in conjunction with his old mates The Levellers. His latest project involves some of his poems taken from his published All Kinds of Disorder book, with music and effects by Jon Sevink of The Levellers and Robert Kennedy. Sometimes disarmingly personal, at others witty and dry, Burbridge name checks many Brighton people and places, obliquely and otherwise; from Stanmer Park to Laurie Booth. Seventies Americana seems to be undergoing something of a revival lately, with loads of new singer-songwriters plundering that classic, polished sound. Chicago man David Vandervelde is one such performer, and debut album Waiting For The Sunrise instantly sounds like nothing from the last few decades. While there’s nothing incredibly original about paying tribute to the likes of Neil Young or Gram Parsons, Vandervelde’s strength as a memorable songwriter shines through on this record, which gets better with every listen. Toronto doomy electro duo Nadja, on latest album Skin Turns To Glass sound like they’re not of this world. Hazy squalls of feedback and thunderous drums sound like the mothership touching down as cold electronic stabs burst out of the landscape and this sounds truly incredible. Touching on the brilliance of Jesu or Sunn 0))). A little space now for some singles, starting with San Francisco’s The Dodos’ latest release, ‘Fools’. Nicely produced and energetic, the lead banjo strum and polished, layered Arcade Fire-esque feeling makes this an entertaining, if unoriginal effort. BIMM students and alumni The Disciples of Shred’s ‘In The Search For The Unknowable Scale Of Truth’ is an insane debut confidently embracing every power metal cliché with a tongue-in-cheek, slightly Tenacious D smile. Technically highly accomplished, this may not be the most fashionable surround at the moment, but full credit for originality and pure rocking out value. Manowar would be proud.
If you would like your event listed please email listings@thelatest.co.uk
To listen to the chart and submit your track, go to www.latest7.co.uk/chart Or hear the full chart with Jeff and Nick on Radio Reverb, 97.2fm every Tuesday 4-6pm/12-2am Brighton Latest Download Chart Top 10
★ 1 sMs – I’m Sorry Dave ★ 2 Caramel Jack – Curtain 3 ThePrjctMyhm – FreeForAll 4 sMs – Airport Dreaming 5 The Woo!worths – Konichiwa 6 Transformer – Cinema Car 7 Tractor Countdown – Control 8 Portslade – Girls and Boys 9 Cath O'Drae – Mugged by the system 10 Dannydangerously – Haribo Quirky electro oddball sMs is rapidly becoming a chart mainstay, with not one but two songs in the top five: ‘I’m Sorry Dave’ at number one and ‘Airport Dreaming’ at three. Speaking of chart mainstays, Caramel Jack hit the second spot. Moody hip-hop outfit ThePrjcMhym and indie popsters The Woo!Worths are at three and five respectively. 11 Tenek State Of Mind 12 Jay Pulman Last Orders 13 Jonny Loves House Not Just In My Head 14 Caramel Jack We Could Build Skyscrapers 15 Kings Of The Wild Front Ear The Healer 16 Scribe-Tribe Freedom 17 Leo Altarelli See It Now 18 The Mighty Rivals Something In My Way 19 Django Spears No Limit 20 Largo Silversp**n 21 Abstrakt Matchstick Mayhem 22 Guerrilla Audio Another Life 23 Automatic Shoes Your Father 24 Reckless Sons Animal 25 Thankyou Anyway Nowhere Else To Go
26 The Vainglories Neisseria 27 Abstrakt & Buzz Devil To Pay 28 Digitalis No Control 29 Heavyman Tomb Kreator Vs. Heavyman 30 Sherlock Bones The Ugly Bugs Balls 31 Without Warrant Superego 32 Jaybee Sweet Savage 33 My Last Victory Facing the Winds of Adversity 34 Cath O’Drae Sofageddon 35 Greenkeepers Caught Up 36 Dubdog KimBlee – Fade 37 Cakeboy Damage featuring Frances Law 38 Millsy Slug Music My Giddy Aunt 39 The Pulse Used In Part 40 Chris T-T A-Z
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01273 687171 formerly joogleberry
musicbar tuesday sept 16th
mike shannon blues band +tom cat blake
£5 or £10 inc dinner 7.30pm
hot jump-up blues & spanish rhythms direct from florida!
PARTIES now booking
xdm a s inners
wednesday world music wednesdays juerga flamenca: sept 17th with dunia live flamenco £6/£5 8pm
thursday sept 18th
dance & music
rich somers funny ha ha +support
cathy p, marie vagan, julie jepson, claire parker, andy bryant
£5 8pm
inspired, soulful folk/blues
friday sept 19th
ska toons + ska DJs
mile high party night
a rockin collision of ska, funk & jazz
calling all cabin crew, pilots and airport workers!
£8 8pm BOOM BOOM SALOON
8pm £7/5
£7
7.30pm
FREE 10.30pm - 2.30am
saturday sept 20th BOOM BOOM SALOON FREE 10.30pm - 2.30am
sunday sept 21st
trudi styles bares all! new show, new band, new frocks, new jokes £5 7.30pm
OTB soul think Stevie Wonder & the Supremes! £10 9pm
30’s/40’s swing band – party like it’s 1939! £5 8pm
roast ‘n’ jazz the big girls
stacey dawson alto sax terry £10 incl lunch seabrook piano 12.30pm – 3.30pm
monday sept 22nd
gay tango workshop
£10
tango lessons for all
8pm
rockin & rhythm
blues band one of the funkiest & soul-full bands around £6 7pm
dear jon+los bonobos +le band extraordinaire + the beautiful word wonderful quirky pop music £4/3 8pm
& parties + weddings, civil partnerships, birthdays… …for the funkiest parties call us and book the venue for FREE• •subject to conditions
have a soul xmas with us!
thelatest.co.uk/musicbar 14 - 17 Manchester Street joogleberry.com
check our website for full programme
039_LS390_music_listings
9/11/08
2:46 PM
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For complete listings go to thelatest.co.uk/7
MUSIC& CLUBLISTINGS 16 – 22 Sep Tuesday 16 Live Music Essie Jain Folksy New York singer-songwriter compared to Vashti Bunyan. Hope, 8pm, £6/4 Mike Shannon Blues Band Premier American jump blues band featuring Tom Cat Blake. Latest Music Bar (formerly Joogleberry), 8pm, £10 Wildbird and Peacedrums + Peter Broderick Swedish experimentalists. Prince Albert, 8pm, £6–7 Bars and clubs Audio Snide. Indie disco. 10pm–2am, £3/2 Brighton Coalition Latin Fever. Latin music to get your juices flowing. 10pm–2am, free Digital Glitterati. A classy night for student types. 11pm–3am, £4/3 Pavilion Tavern Guerrilla Rocks. Indie, rock, metal and emo. 10:30pm–2am, £2/1 Water Margin International Student Party. Drinks promos all night. 10pm–5am, £5/3
Wednesday 17 Live Music Bob Log III + King Size Slim and D-66 Mississippi Delta Blues with hip hop and punk. Arizona's maddest man. Engine Rooms, 8pm, £8 Club NME: The Perils Jingly-jangy locals. Followed by indie club night. Brighton Coalition, 10:30pm, free. Eileen Rose + The Holy Wreck Americana with soft edges. Komedia, 7:30pm, £10 Iglu and Hartley Californian rap-rockers. Komedia, 7:30pm, £6 Platforms Magazine Night: Peter and the Wolf + Alessi + The Bobby McGee’s + Planet Earth Haunting nu-folk slightly like Beirut. The Hope, 8pm, £6 Suzy Bradley Acoustic. Juggler, 8:30pm, free. We Dreamed America: Hey Negrita + The Travelling Band A cross between Johnny Cash and Rolling Stones. Komedia, 7:30pm, £10/8 World Music Wednesday: Jeurga Flamenco Dunia Flamenco dance with live band. Latest Music Bar (formerly Joogleberry), 8pm, £6/5
covers and new songs. Komedia, 7pm, £20 Hour Hands + St Deluxe + Dog End Disco Prince Albert, 8pm, £tbc. The Jamm + The Lanes Veteran Weller etc tribute’s farewell tour. Concorde 2, 7:30pm, £10 Rich Somers Singer-songwriter drawing influence from rural England to the Caribbean. Latest Music Bar (ex Joogleberry), 8pm, £5 Sofa Sessions Open mic. Juggler, 8:30pm, free. Sound Factory Stripped: Just Ask Johnny Unplugged action. The Providence, 8pm, £1 The Trachtenburg Family Slideshow Players If Holy Fuck hadn’t already taken that name, it would have been ideal for this insane NYC pop three-piece. The Hope, 7:30pm, £10/9 Venetia and the Voltage Electro-pop rockers. Om Bar and Club, 8:30pm, free Bars and clubs Arc Dynamite Boogaloo. Cabaret capers and outrageous stage games pop ‘n’ krunk, indiefunk and electro junk! 10pm–3am, £2/1 Audio Mad for It. Brighton’s legendary indie night. 10:30pm- 3am, £3/1.50 Honey Club Contagious. Southern FM’s Paul Hilyer spins dance tunes. 10:30pm–3am, £3/1 Po Na Na Off the Wall. Funk, soul and Motown from the 50s to now. 10pm–3am, £2 The Hope Brap FM. Various Artists. Moif, Pav, 1UP, Pook and The Recess with everything from Downtempo to Techno. 8pm–2am, free
Friday 19
Thursday 18
Live Music Bucket-Joy + Dirty Wonderland + The Deadlines Grunge. Prince Albert, 8pm, £4 Chiddingly Festival: International Event Featuring Siyaya Arts of Bulawayo, Zimbabwe, performing traditional and modern African song and dance. Chiddingly Village Hall, 7:30pm, £10 Club Chat Noir: Rockin ‘n’ Rhythm + The Hot Club De Belleville Gypsy and 20s/30s swing club night with bands and DJs. Hanbury Club, 7pm, £4–£9 The Prince Regent Quartet Beethoven and Mozart. St Lukes Church, 7:30pm, £6/4 Return of the Bumpsquad Popular Brightonbased funksters. The Brunswick, 8pm, £5 Simon Finn with Joolie Wood and Karl Blake + Elizabeth Walling + Birdengine Semi-legendary psyche-folk veteran. Thurston Moore’s a fan! Redroaster Café, 8pm, £5 Sound Factory: Swervin’ Merv + Seeker + Godspots Unsigned bands. Providence, 8pm, £1 Spear of Destiny Post-punk from ex-Theatre of Hate men. Concorde 2, 7pm, £12.50 Van Morrison The legendary soul veteran. Brighton Dome, 8pm, £40–£105
Live Music The Big Ballroom Bash Charity meal with magic and live performances from The Jamestown Union, Joe and Jamie, Travelo and Reaction. Hanbury Club, 7pm, £35 inc dinner. Brian Kennedy One of Ireland’s most successful singers. Komedia, 7:30pm, £17.50 Clare Teal Jazz singer-songwriter blending
Bars and clubs Arc Sweet and Dandy. Sixties . 11pm–3am, £3 Brighton Coalition Skandalous!. Live benefit gig for Circus2Iraq. Bonkers mix of cabaret, circus, beats, banging breaks, bass and badgers. With Dread Zone Sound System, Bad Science and Slackers Convention. 8pm–4am, £9/7.50
Bars and clubs Brighton Coalition Club NME. A beerfest for All Stars wearing rock/indie fans with live NME bands and Brighton DJs. 10:30pm–3:30am, free. Funky Buddha Lounge We Luv 90s. Classic 90s anthems from Spice Girls to Soul2Soul. 90p. Contact venue for details. Water Margin Genetics. Liquid, neuro and darkside D’n’B. 10pm–6am, free–£2
➧ Please check with venue before travelling. See our venue directory for details
Digital Stone Love. 101% maximum indie rock’n’roll with DJ and bands. 11pm–3am, £6/5 Engine Rooms Deviant. Hard moshin’ rock alternative. 11pm–3am, £5/3 Funky Fish The Funkyfish Club. Soul, funk, old skool, 60s and 70s. 10pm–3am, £5/3.50 Komedia Born Bad. Delinquent rhythms, red hot rockabilly, 50s rock’n’roll, 60s garage and girl groups. 11pm–3am, £6/5 Latest Music Bar The Boom Boom Saloon. New late night liquor lounge spinning rock’n’roll, rhythm ‘n’ blues, country funk, soul and swing! 10:30pm–2:30am, free. Ocean Rooms Somewhere in the Universe. Henron mixes up his usual frenzy.10pm–4am, £3–£5 Pavilion Tavern Kick Out the Jams. Rock’n’Roll mayhem sploshed together with beer, indie anthems and punk. 10:30pm–3am, £4/3 Po Na Na Ice Box. Funky house night for a dressed up crowd. 10pm–3am, £5/4 Sidewinder DJ Drkhrse. House, breaks, disco and more! 8pm–2am, free. Tru Club Generation. Three rooms with commercial dance, R’n’B and dollops of cheesy 70s and 80s hits. 10pm–3am, £10/8 Volks Dubpressure. Serious dubpressure spun out through a 16k funktion one soundsystem for unadulterated ear-bleedin’ rhythms. Special guests TBA. 11pm–4am, £5 Water Margin B-Side. Tech and filthy electro with Tiger Lily and Paul My Fingah. 2am, £5
Saturday 20 Live Music Cry Tuff Roots reggae. Hare & Hounds, 9pm, free The Dissociates + The Clarks + Meow Meows Prince Albert, 8pm, £tbc. Los Albertos + Big Red Ass Genre-mashing ska-infused locals start the Saturday night party. The Brunswick, 8pm, £5 Nigel Kennedy Quintet Popular spikey-haired classical star. Brighton Dome, 8pm, £24.50–£28 Ritary Gaguenetti Quartet Dutch gypsy music incorporating funk . Hanbury Club, 7pm, £7–£10 Rockin’ and Rhythm 30s & 40s swing band. Latest Music Bar (ex Joogleberry ), 8pm, £5 Saturday Soul Trudi Styles is your host for this night of music and cabaret with the OTB Soul band. Latest Music Bar, 7:30pm, £12.50 Bars and clubs Arc Hold Up. Indie night. 10:30pm–4am, £5 Brighton Coalition Pop Musik. Fiesta with pop pleasures, wonky one hit wonders & classics from the 60s to now. 10pm–3am, £6–£10 Concorde 2 Devotion. High Contrast. High Contrast is no sidewalk stranger to Drum’n’Bass. With Subfocus also spinning massive tracks, it’s a drum’n’bass showcase. 11pm–4am, £10 adv. Digital Junkbox. presents. Guests TBA! 11pm–4am, £TBC. Engine Rooms Classic Rock. Classic rock and metal from AC/DC to Zeppelin. 11pm–3am, £5 Esca Saturdays@Esca. Deep, sexy, funky grooves with DJ Andy G. 9pm–2am, free. Funky Buddha Lounge Buddha Soul. Disco, funk, house and rare groove from Juice Fm’s Mike Panteli. 10pm–3am, £10 Funky Fish The Funkyfish Club. Soul, funk, old skool, 60s and 70s tunes. 10pm–3am, £6/3.50
Honey Club Sevensins. Big room electro, trance and house with guests. 10:30pm–5am, £12/5 Ocean Rooms Torture Garden. The World’s largest & most famous Fetish / Body Art/ Twisted Burlesque Club returns£16 non mem/14 mem. Contact venue. Blow the Electro Afterparty. 3:30am–8am, £6/5 Tru Glitterbaby. Chart tunes. 10pm–3am, £10/7 Volks Psytrance. 11pm–4am, £TBC Water Margin Logo. Future heroes to world famous DJs spin house tunes. 3am–8am, £7/5
Sunday 21 Live Music The Big Girls Blues Band Seven piece soul and funk band. Latest Music Bar, 7pm, £7 Brighton Early Music Festival: Irish Music Sessions All singers/players welcome to join in. The Brunswick, 8pm, free Brighton Early Music Festival: Trad Folk Day Free family folk fun! Open air ceilidh and bands, food/beer. Adelaide Cres, 2pm–6pm, free Car Free Day: 12 Stone Toddler + Drookit Dogs + Melodica, Melody and Me + Hot Club De Belleville + Los Piratas + Silver Sounds A Free gig to celebrate European Mobility Week. Brighton Town Hall, 2–5pm, free Forever Young A tribute to Neil Young and Bob Dylan. The Neptune, 8:30pm, free Hot Club of Cowtown Western swing from this trio who have toured with Dylan, Willie Nelson & The Mavericks. Komedia, 8pm, £12.50 Paul Curreri Charlottesville, Virginia singersongwriter who has collaborated with the great Devon Sproule. Pavilion Theatre, 7:30pm, £10 Roast ‘n’ Jazz: Stacey Dawson Alto sax and some Sunday lunch. What’s not to like? Latest Music Bar 12:30pm, £10 inc full roast dinner Sussex Jazz Orchestra Classical and modern jazz. Hangleton Manor, 4pm, free Bars and clubs Honey Club Sundelicious. Knockin’ siesta sundays into the past, Lee Garrett and Salerno play house and soulful beats. 10pm–3am, £2/1 The Open House We Change The Frequency. Stephen Jarvis boshes out all things diverse from Radiohead, Madlib & Playgroup. 8pm, free
Monday 22 Live Music Dear Jon + Los Bonobos + Le Band Extraordinaire + The Beautiful Word A night of quirky pop music. Latest Music Bar, 8pm,£4/3 Martin Carthy and Dave Swarbrick + Lisa Knapp British folk veterans and former members of Fairport Convention and Steeleye Span. Ravenswood, Sharpthorne, 8pm, £15/13 Subhumans Old-school punk a little like Crass. Engine Rooms, 7:30pm, £7.50 Bars and clubs Funky Buddha Lounge Urban Lounge. DJs Outbreak, Rudeben and Dubl break out the best in Old skool garage, R’n’B, Hip Hop, Bashment and swing. 10:30pm–3am, £3/2 Volks Strictly Reggae. Dancehall, bashment, roots and revival. 10pm, £4.50/3.50 Music by Nick Aldwinckle Clubs and Bars by Jaime Pettit
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040_LS390 gay news/will
9/10/08
3:30 PM
Page 2
LATESTGAY
See more at thelatest.co.uk
Brighton’s only weekly gay guide
William Tells
NEWS
Will Harris dreams of a life in the tropics, then wakes up to reality
Singing in the rain Brighton and Hove (Actually) Gay Men’s Chorus went ahead with their performance at Cardiff Pride, even though many events were cancelled because of rain. The choir joined with The South Wales Gay Men’s Chorus to sing in the city on Friday 5 September. Luckily the concert was programmed to be held in City Church so choristers and their audience could shelter from the downpour. A second concert, due to be held the following day in the cabaret tent at the main Pride festival, had to be cancelled. Gerry McCrudden, spokesman for Brighton and Hove (Actually) Gay Men’s Chorus, said the choir got soaked just moving around the city. He said: “It was terrible. It was a real shame because they must have spent a year planning it.“ The chorus is due to perfom at the Old Market, Hove on Sunday 16 November. The Roses of Success, will be a gala performance of all their best numbers from the past three years. Chairman John Hamilton said: “We are developing a firm reputation. As someone aptly put it to me the other day ‘your singing actually gladdens the heart’’. I was delighted that the chorus raised £1,000 for local charities at its sell-out August concert. Our diary is rapidly filling up and many performances are slated over the coming year. It was an honour recently for us to sing at the 75th birthday for our beloved patron and Brighton institution David Raven.’’ The choir is looking for more singers, musicians and associated members, who might not want to sing and perform, but might be interested in helping to organise and stage productions. Email publicity@bhagmc.org, visit www.bhagmc.org or call Gerry McCrudden on 0791 2873235. The Chorus rehearses every Thursday at St Andrews.
In the grand, gay, social order, I’ve always fancied myself a place at the posher end of the spectrum. I was privately educated, I majored in classical languages, and – most importantly of all – I know which wine to choose to complement each course at a dinner party (very, very important aristo skill). Every once in a while, though, I’ll find myself in the company of a gay man so unbelievably well-bred his very presence will instantly downgrade me from Rupert Everett to Kenny Everett. Case in point: I recently found myself on a date with William, a young artist with a specialism in contemporary sculpture and a family with a specialism in old money. And when I say old money, I do in fact mean gold doubloons, tarnished with the blood of seven generations of slaves. You see, quite accidentally, I’d walked into a date with the heir to a Bermudan rum plantation. Of course this instantly made him a pretty attractive proposition, particularly to me, the heir to a sliding-mirror wardrobe business in Coventry. I’d always had a dream of retiring to the tropics, where I could spend my golden years soaking up the sun on a yacht and drinking something mildly toxic from a coconut, while a couple of cabin boys stand by to periodically hoist the mainsail. But that’s all it ever was for me: a dream. For him, it could be a reality.
“A gay man so unbelievably well-bred his very presence will instantly downgrade me from Rupert to Kenny Everett“ As the date wore on, and William ordered bottle after bottle of unnervingly expensive wine (with the solemn assurance that I wouldn‘t have to pay a penny), I found myself increasingly enchanted by the images he was conjuring up: lunches at the yacht club, champagne socials at the governor’s mansion, all the profligate trappings that we all secretly dream of while lying through our teeth that, ‘money doesn‘t buy happiness’. (NB I’ve never heard the expression ‘crying all the way to the bank‘.) In fact, I was all but ready to start picking out the wedding china, when something he said jarred me out of my rum-soaked dream world. He didn’t know how to cook. Seriously, the man had never cooked a meal in his life. Never. Not even an egg (believe me, I checked). Nor did he have any inclination to learn. You see, he’d always had someone to cook his meals for him, from his first childhood servant to all the top chefs of Europe, and that was enough for him. Suddenly my imaginary sojourn on the dream boat wasn’t looking so rosy after all. We may have shared a Christian name, but William and I came from different worlds. I knew we’d never really have anything in common. And I was damned if I was going to end up in leg irons, slaving in the galley for some colonial throwback, coconut or no coconut. I’ve never really liked rum anyway. Like my proletariat brothers and sisters, who may drink red wine with chicken, but for whom a boiled egg holds no fear, I’m definitely more a vodka kind of guy.
Crossword solutions Win a Banksy People taking afternoon tea will have the chance to win a Banksy image to take home. No Name Restaurant Bar in Kemp Town, Brighton will give five raffle tickets to each customer buying tea and cakes during September and October.The winner, drawn in the first week of November by a local personality, will receive a Banksy print worth £60. The print is one of a collection on show at the restaurant at 81-82 St James’s Street. The collection has been produced by Cardome the popular cards and gifts shop at 47a St James's Street. Smaller canvases are on show at Cardome together with a range of Banksy image cards. For further information contact Mike Dalley on Cardome@gmail.com
40 latest 7
Solution to Cryptic 161 ACROSS: 7 Adamant 8 Acorn 9 Cacti 10 Giggler 11 Masquerade 14 Annihilate 17 Mallard 19 Trust 20 Naive 21 Ailment DOWN: 1 Carcase 2 Taciturn 3 Stager 4 Bang 5 Polly 6 Increscent 9 Commitment 12 Daintily 13 Saluted 15 Indian 16 Slain 18 Axed Solution to Quick 161 ACROSS: 7 Craving 8 Roach 9 Prong 10 Emperor 11 Outlandish 14 Restaurant 17 Rambler 19 Pilot 20 Tulip 21 Flounce DOWN: 1 Calotte 2 Disgrace 3 Agreed 4 Trap 5 Tarry 6 Thermostat 9 Prosperity 12 Sculptor 13 Calling 15 Tariff 16 Small 18 Lope © Crossword Shop
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000_LS390_gay listings
9/12/08
9:42 AM
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GAY
For full listings & venues go to thelatest.co.uk
GAYLISTINGS 16 – 22 September Tuesday 16 Amsterdam Amsterdam Spice. Enjoy a curry, rice, poppadom and Cobra beer from £6.99 then a Bollywood movie! Bar open 11am–11pm, free. Brighton Tavern City of Brighton Gay Men’s Chorus. Bar open 12pm, free. Ghetto (Formerly Candy Bar) Twisted Karaoke. Twisted Karaoke is your golden opportunity to get vocal with over 3,000 tracks to choose from. 10pm, free. Legends Relax – It’s Tuesday! Relaxed, friendly bar with smoking/sun terrace. Bar open 11am–5am, free. Queen’s Arms Karaoke with Betty Swollocks. 9pm, free. R-Bar Shoot Me Baby! Get a FREE shot of Corky’s or Sourz with every alcoholic bevvy! 12:pm–2am, free. Revenge Flashback. The best 80s nostalgic tunes from Lady P and Two-Foot. 10:30pm–3am, £2/NUS go free.
Vocalists, comedians and drag (3.30–5.30pm). Then party with Kamp Kevin til midnite! Bar open 12pm–12:30am, free. R-Bar Kinky – The Early Session. A pre-clubbing crowd get ready for Kinky Dangerous with new boy on the block, Jozzie O. 9pm–7am, free. Revenge Kinky Dangerous. Gay Brighton’s Kings of the Saturday night! 4 top DJs, 2 floors, and 6.5 hours of fun. 10:30pm–5am, £3/7. Star Inn Bear Essentials. DJ Charlie. Bar open 12pm–1am, free. The Aquarium Theatre Bar Cabaret Night. 9pm, free. The Basement Ignition. with the dance sounds of DJ Peter Castle. 11pm–4am, free for first 100 b4 12/£5 after. The PV at The Jury’s Out Saturday Madness. The best in Brighton duets from 4.30pm, then from 8.30pm PV’s house DJs take to the decks! Bar open 12pm, free.
Sunday 21 Wednesday 17 Ghetto (Formerly Candy Bar) Miss-Shapes. A cool mix of indie and pop for a crowd of cool gay kidz. 10pm, £tbc. Legends Relax – It’s Wednesday! Bar open 11am–5am, free. Prince Regent Swimming Pool Out to Swim South. 8:30pm, £4 per session. R-Bar Cocktail Club. Enjoy the champagne lifestyle on lemonade money. 12pm–2am. Revenge Pop! SEXY. Expect live on stage entertainment and chart pop and R’n’B. 10:30pm–3am, £3/2 NUS. Star Inn Charity Jukebox. Bar open 12pm–11pm. The Basement Play. with DJ Alex Baker spinning all things house. 11pm–4am, free.
Thursday 18 Arc Dynamite Boogaloo. Cabaret capers and outrageous stage games moulded with a little pop, funk, krunk ‘n’ electro junk. 10:30pm–3am, £3/1. Charles Street Club Religion. Two floors of funky house. Hosted by Mother Superior Joan Bond with Tony B and Mikalis. 10pm, £4/3. Ghetto (Formerly Candy Bar) Tits Up. One of many monthly themed Kitsch Parties. Check out the venue for theme info. 10pm, £tbc. Queen’s Arms Lucky Dip Karaoke. hosted by Betty Swollocks. 12pm–11:30pm, free. R-Bar I can’t wait for the weekend to begin! 12pm–2am, free. Revenge Girls On Top. Fabulously trashy weekly lesbian night with DJ Smiffy. 10:30pm–4am, free b4 11:30 with passes, £4/5 after. The Basement Eddie K’s Jukebox. 11pm–4am.
Amsterdam Sunday lunch. Traditional roasts (12–5.30pm) and relaxing Sunday vibes with a cabaret twisted. Hosted by Connie Conway from 8pm, free. Audio Sunday Sundae. Delve into a unique blend of old skool house and pop classics served up by DJs Richard Jones, Diablo and Kate Wildblood. 6pm, £3/4/5. Ghetto (Formerly Candy Bar) Sirens. A burlesque night with pole dancing and raunchy numbers! 10pm, £tbc. Legends Sunday Cabaret with Kandi Kane. 3.15pm, free. Po Na Na Cash Queen. DJs Mick Fuller, Freddie Thomas and Sarah Favouritism on rotation serving up large helpings of sexy, soulful and funky house! £4/5/7. Contact venue for details. The Basement Embrace. Remixed Pop tracks with G-A-Y DJ, Nick Shepherdson. 11pm–4am.
Monday 22 Amsterdam The Monday Musical. Gimmie gimmie gimmie a musical, some fresh popcorn and a drink from the bar! Bar open 11am, free. Charles Street Club Studio 150. DJs Luke and Ali spin the best party tracks spanning the last 4 decades with drinks promos. 10pm–2am, £1.50. Ghetto (Formerly Candy Bar) Shibby Shabblers. DJs Pookie and Crackwhore. £1.50 pints and vodka mix. 10pm–2am, £3/2. Legends Dave Lynn and Friends. A hysterical night of cabaret, 9:30pm. Bar open 11pm–5am. Queen’s Arms Cherry Poppins Karaoke Show. plus drinks promos, 9pm. Bar open 12pm, free. The Basement Back to the 80s and 90s. Let DJ Steve Lush whisk you back with his classic floorfillers. 11pm–4am, free.
Friday 19 Amsterdam The Jazz Lounge with Wesley Sebastian. Swing and jazz. 9pm, free. Ghetto (Formerly Candy Bar) Popstarz. Indie anthems, alternative classics and current underground hits. 10pm, £tbc. Legends Pre Celebration. Pure pop sounds. 7pm, free. Queen’s Arms Andy B’s Camp Attack. Cabaret and games. Bar open 12pm–1am, free. R-Bar Lollipop Warm Up. Flex the drinking arm at this weekend warm up. 12pm–5am, free. Revenge Lollipop vs Housexual. Top pop tunes from Stewart T. Upstairs find funky vocal house with DJ Hollie and guests. 10:30pm–5am, free b4 11/£5 b4 12/£7 after. Star Inn The Return of the Friday Bears Inc. with guest DJs playing uplifting funky house and pop remixes. 8pm–1am, free. The Basement Celebration with Dolly Rocket. Double the DJ power with Alex Baker playing girly pop & handbag tracks all night long. 11pm–4am, free for first 150 b4 12/£4 after.
Cabaret with Kandi Kane, Legends, Sunday 21
Saturday 20 Amsterdam Sun Downers. Enjoy the best beach house music in Brighton. 8pm–2am, free. Ghetto (Formerly Candy Bar) Wigout. Soho’s long running pop party. A kitschy, cool night for the seriously unserious. £tbc. Legends Pre Ignition. 7pm, free. Queen’s Arms Karaoke Party with Kamp Kevin.
➧ Please check with venue before travelling. See our venue directory online for details
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042_LS390_TVIntro
9/12/08
11:48 AM
Page 2
latestTV Dani on TV
She says it how she sees it
Films on TV
16 – 22 September
Movies on the box this week and generally living by their wits. Great fun in the afternoon.
FRIDAY 19 Ong-Bak ★★★★★ (2003, Sky Movies Indie, 11.45pm. Dir Prachya Pinkaew) When the head of the village holy statue in Thailand is stolen the local martial arts talent is sent to the city to reclaim it. Starring Tony Jaa, this is an incredible martial arts film with a sturdy plot and great acting support.
SATURDAY 20
Strictly Come Dancing BBC 1, Saturday 20 September Bruce and Tess are back (groan), hosting the next in a long line of Strictly Come Dancing. I know lots of people seem to like Bruce but I can’t stand the man. I find him slimy and sickly. And coupled with the ever-so terribly dressed – I know she doesn’t pick her outfits for the show but whoever does should be shot as nine times out of ten they look awful. Anyway enough of a moan about the dresses pushing her boobs either flat to nothing or up to her chin. And If I hear Bruce say “It’s nice to see you…” I will scream. And to top it all off, possibly the most arrogant and sleazy TV presenter is one of the contestants – it’s Andrew Castle, the guy who once played a bit of tennis and now spends his days saying derogatory things and making people feel small on the GMTV couch. Also to add to the bunch of oddballs this year we have Gary Rhodes tapping his toes on the dancefloor. I think Gary Rhodes is really strange. I cannot tell you a specific reason why but he kind of freaks me out a bit and I don’t enjoy the idea of seeing him attempt a tango! We do also have our fair share of females to add to the list, Lisa Snowdon will be prancing around showing us all that she can do it better. If you look on the Strictly Come Dancing website at the pictures of the forthcoming celebrity contestants she is the only one posing her butt off! Along with her is Heather Small (from M People), I wonder if she is attempting a comeback and using this a way to get her foot back in the limelight side of the door. Accompanying these are a host of soap stars and ex-sportsmen. None of whom I recognise so I am afraid I will not be able to make a comment on any of them other than the fact that the girls from the soaps always look the same: blonde hair, small features, squeaky voices. Oh what fun it will be! I like watching to see if anyone falls over or if any of the unlikely couples ‘get it on’. This is something my nan watches. Not that there is a problem with that. It just isn’t something I worry about. I wouldn’t set my watch by it, nor would I give up plans to do anything else to watch it. But it is light-hearted fun, which is something of a rarity nowadays. To me it’s a bit like a live pantomime, booing at the judges, cheering at the celebs while Bruce and Tess play the ugly sisters! 42 latest 7
TUESDAY 16
The Shootist ★★★★★ (1976, Five, 6pm. Dir Don Siegel) Starring John Wayne and Lauren Bacall. The Duke excels in his final screen role as J B Books, one of the West’s greatest gunslingers. Books is diagnosed as having terminal cancer. Hoping to spend his last days in peace, but unable to escape his reputation, he prepares himself for one last showdown.
Bedazzled ★★★★✩ (1967, BBC1, 12.05am. Dir Stanley Donen) Starring Pete Cook and Dudley Moore in their heyday, this is a contemporary exploration of a Faustian pact without the Hollywood glitz of the Liz Hurley/Brendan Fraser remake. Can Dud make a deal with the devil and still come out on top? Were the Sixties really this cool? Can you stay up late enough to catch the end?
(2002, ITV1, 7.30pm. Dir Peter Jackson) Seen by fans as the best film of the lot. Lavish adaptation of the second book in JRR Tolkien’s epic fantasy trilogy about a hobbit who inherits a ring with dark powers and embarks upon a dangerous quest to destroy it.
WEDNESDAY 17
SUNDAY 21
Resident Evil: Apocalypse
The Notebook ★★★★✩ (2004, Channel 4, 9pm. Dir Nick Cassavetes) During regular visits to an old lady in a nursing home, an old man reads from a faded notebook containing the sweeping account of a young couple whose love affair was put to a halt after their separation during World War II. Classy love story that even the boys will like.
★★✩✩✩ (2004, Five, 9pm. Dir Alexander Witt) Picking up where parts one left off in both the preceding film and the video game, Milla Jovovich wakes up in a desolate Raccoon City confused but determined to kick ass. Zombies a-plenty and fidelity to a bestselling game result in this being a living dead movie that can hold its own in the genre.
THURSDAY 18 How To Marry A Millionaire
★★★✩✩ (1953, Film4, 2.40pm. Dir Jean Negulesco) Marilyn Monroe and Lauren Bacall team up in this musical comedy of two show girls in search of rich pickings. With Bacall playing the street smarts and Monroe the girl smarts they embark upon a caper that finds them drugging their copassengers, being accused of theft
The Lord Of The Rings: The Two Towers★★★★✩
MONDAY 22 Ae Fond Kiss★★★★✩ (2004, Channel 4, 10pm. Dir Ken Loach) A gritty account of two blue-collar workers in love, one a Scottish girl and the other a product of an immigrant Pakistani family, all taking place in the not so glamorous city of Glasgow during the late 20th century. They meet during a racial incident. The romance takes off, they find they are getting along swell, and then the price comes due. Loach at his finest.
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tuesday 16 Horizon BBC2, 9pm The most powerful job on the planet is about to open its White House doors to applicants and Horizon is asking for a quiet word in the next incumbent’s shell-like regarding science. Collecting some of the world’s leading scientists, Horizon puts together information and advice the brains think the next Pres should know.
Bodyshock: The Girl with Two Faces Channel 4, 10pm Why is it that those with the least available to them are thrown the greatest adversity? So might be considered by the parents of baby Lali, born in early March 2008 in remote rural India with two faces. Getting past a distrust of modern medicine and getting to Bangalore prove hard feats.
Flight of the Conchords BBC4, 9.30pm With a chart-topping album of songs and more than simply the cult following they collected from YouTube the first time this was shown, it’s another chance to catch the Kiwi boys’ sitcom. Bret’s sign-holding career gets in the way of the band so Murray fires him, leaving Jermaine with just a tape machine on stage.
terrestrial
sport
BBC1
BBC2
ITV1
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Five
Sky Sports 1
6.00am Breakfast 9.15 Helicopter Heroes 10.00 Homes Under the Hammer 11.00 Open House 11.30 Car Booty 12.15pm Bargain Hunt 1.00 BBC News 1.30 South East Today 1.45 Doctors 2.15 Diagnosis Murder 3.00 BBC News 3.05 Lazytown 3.30 Bear Behaving Badly 3.50 Eliot Kid 4.03 The Owl 4.05 Young Dracula 4.35 Do Something Different 5.00 Newsround 5.15 The Weakest Link
6.00 – 9.00am Children’s television 9.00 Mister Maker 9.20 Something Special: Out and About 9.40 Little Red Tractor 9.55 Pingu 10.00 In the Night Garden 10.30 Big Barn Farm 10.45 Get Squiggling 11.00 KS1 Science Clips 11.10 Ancient Greece 11.30 The Chronicles of Narnia 11.45 Let’s Write a Story 12.00pm The Daily Politics 1.00 Out of the Blue 1.25 Coast: Scotland 1.30 Working Lunch 2.00 Sun, Sea and Bargain Spotting 3.00 Murder, She Wrote 3.45 Flog It! 4.30 Step Up to the Plate 5.15 Wanted Down Under 6.00 Eggheads Quizilicious. 6.30 MasterChef the Professionals It’s finals’ week. The second two winners of the quarter finals go head to head for a place in the final three. 7.00 Paralympics 2008: Games Today Clare Balding and Steve Cram present action from the Paralympic competition in Beijing. On the final day of action in the athletics stadium, both the men’s and women’s 1500m take place. 8.00 Tiger Spy in the Jungle David Attenborough narrates the lives of four growing tiger cubs using footage collected by hidden-cameracarrying elephants. 9.00 Horizon See highlights. 9.50 Strictly Black Grouse Wildlife documentary. 10.00 Later Live...with Jools Holland Godfathers of rock Metallica visit the studio, making her UK TV debut, Italian born First Lady of France, Carla Bruni performs a song or two and Kings of Leon showcase tracks from their upcoming album 10.30 Newsnight 11.20 Today at Conference Andrew Neil presents highlights from the day’s speeches and events at the Liberal Democrat Party Conference. 11.50 Three Men in a Boat 12.50am Joins BBC News 4.00 Britain 1750-1900 5.00 20th Century Wrap
6.00am GMTV 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 10.30 This Morning 11.15 ITV News 11.20 Meridian News and Weather 11.25 This Morning 12.30pm Loose Women 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News and Weather 2.00 60 Minute Makeover 3.00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 4.00 A Touch of Frost 5.00 Britain’s Best Dish
6.05am Making It 6.10 The Hoobs (x2) 7.00 Freshly Squeezed 7.25 Everybody Loves Raymond 7.55 Just Shoot Me 8.25 Will and Grace 8.55 Frasier (x2) 9.55 ER 10.55 Without a Trace 11.55 3 Minute Wonder 12.00pm News at Noon 12.30 Property Ladder 1.35 3 Minute Wonder: Living with Surveillance 1.40 FILM: The Long Memory (1953) 3.25 Countdown 4.15 Deal or No Deal 5.00 Wogan’s Perfect Recall 5.30 Come Dine with Me
6.00 – 9.00am Children’s television 9.00 The Wright Stuff 10.30 Trisha Goddard 11.30 Law and Order: Criminal Intent 12.30pm Five News 12.45 House 1.45 Neighbours 2.15 Home and Away 2.50 Animal Rescue Squad 3.05 The Family Recipe 3.10 FILM: Walter And Henry (2001) 5.00 Five News 5.30 Neighbours
6.00 Meridian Tonight 6.30 ITV Evening News; Weather 7.00 Emmerdale Donald collapses following a row with Anna. Rodney is saddened to see Nicola continue with the book scam. Carl regrets betraying Donald. Yeah, feel bad. 7.30 UEFA Champions League: Marseille V Liverpool Steve Rider introduces live coverage from the Stade Velodrome of Liverpool’s opening UEFA Champions League group stage game against Marseille. Commentary by Clive Tyldesley and David Pleat, studio analysis from Andy Townsend, and pitchside reports from Gabriel Clarke. 10.00 News at Ten;Weather 10.40 UEFA Champions League Highlights Craig Doyle looks back at tonight’s Champions League group stage games. Liverpool take on Marseille in the south of France, and Chelsea host Bordeaux at Stamford Bridge in Luiz Felipe Scolari’s first Champions League game at the helm. Didn’t we just watch this and shout and the screen and everything? Too much beer obviously. 12.00am Guinness Premiership Rugby 1.15 Nightwatch with Steve Scott 2.05 L.A Dragnet 2.55 Loose Women 3.40 The Jeremy Kyle Show 4.35 ITV Nightscreen 5.30 ITV Early Morning News
6.00 The Simpsons 6.30 Hollyoaks As Carmel waits at the altar, seemingly jilted, tempers escalate between the Valentines and the McQueens. Soap weddings, eh? 7.00 Channel 4 News 7.55 3 Minute Wonder: 4Mations 8.00 The Sex Education Show Anna Richardson puts herself through a full sexual MOT, and goes back to school to show teenagers the symptoms of the most common STIs. 9.00 The Secret Millionaire Gavin Wheedon runs a successful translation business, but leaves his millionaire’s lifestyle behind to return to the faded North Wales resort he spent his childhood holidays in. 10.00 Bodyshock: The Girl with Two Faces See highlights. 11.05 Leona Lewis: Video Exclusive 11.10 Reaper The gang encounters a demon support group. 12.10am 4Music Presents: Kings of Leon: Exclusive 12.15 Bennetts British Superbike Championship 1.15 Party Poker Nations Cup 2008 2.05 U21 FIVB Beach Volleyball 3.00 KOTV 3.30 Water Stories 3.40 The Highlander Challenge World Championship 4.35 Grudge Match 4.45 Freesports on 4 5.15 FIVB Beach Volleyball
6.00 Home and Away Jai thinks he is invincible. Never had a superhero in the Bay before. No tall buildings. 6.30 Animal Rescue Squad Florida’s Animal Control Officers rescue more than 30 cats and kittens from an owner who has lost control of them. No one can control cats. 7.00 Five News 7.30 Highland Emergency 8.00 Mary Magdalene – Saint or Sinner? Religious doc focusing on the legend of Mary Magdalene. 9.00 CSI: Miami Horatio learns that the victim of a murder he’s investigating was married to a prisoner who recently threatened Horatio’s son. Convoluted much? 10.00 CSI: NY The CSIs struggle to solve the seemingly random shooting of a woman in the street. The investigation leads to the discovery of a second body – a family-court judge who has been beaten to death in his home. Not a good family place. 11.00 Law and Order: SVU The investigation into the death of a pregnant teenager exposes a long-held family secret. 12.00am FILM: Mean Streets (1973) 2.05 NASCAR: The Sprint Cup 3.00 Seniors Golf 3.50 ITU Triathlon 4.45 ETU Triathlon 5.10 Neighbours 5.35 Home and Away
6.00am Good Morning Sports Fans (x4) 9.00 Ryder Cup Countdown 2008 9.30 Golf: How the Ryder Cup Was Won 12.00pm Champions League Special 1.30 Golf: How the Ryder Cup Was Won 4.30 Champions League Special 6.00 Revista De La Liga 7.00 Ryder Cup Countdown 2008 7.30 Gillette Soccer Special 10.00 Ryder Cup Countdown 2008 10.30 Revista De La Liga 11.30 Golf: How the 2004 Ryder Cup Was Won 1.30am Ryder Cup Countdown 2008 2.00 World Motor Sport 4.30 Ryder Cup Countdown 2008 5.00 Hyundai A League
6.00 BBC News 6.30 South East Today 7.00 The One Show 7.30 EastEnders Max makes a shocking revelation about Jack to Tanya. Now boys, play nice. 7.57 BBC News; Regional News 8.00 Holby City Ric is confronted with some tough choices of his own – can he make a close friend and colleague redundant? Well he’s already been stabbed by one. Maybe toughening up’s the best thing. 9.00 Mutual Friends Jen and Martin start trying for a baby, but Martin struggles to deliver the goods. To make matters worse, his pregnant boss Sarah threatens to fire him unless he brings in more business. Ladies, one at a time to make this fella feel inadequate. 10.00 BBC News 10.25 South East Today 10.33 BBC Weather 10.35 Cheap Homes for Sale? Doc in which newly-married presenter Alex Riley finds out what it takes to climb on to the property ladder. 11.35 Film 2008 with Jonathan Ross Trop Thunder gets Wossed. 12.05am FILM: Bedazzled (1967) 1.45 Weatherview 1.50 Sign Zone: See Hear 2.20 Trawlermen 2.50 The Hairy Bakers 3.20 Chinese Food Made Easy 3.50 Cash in the Celebrity Attic 4.35 Joins BBC News
Sky Sports 2 6.00am Aerobics: Oz Style 6.30 X-Adventures 7.00 WWE Afterburn 8.00 Showjumping 9.00 Powerboating 9.30 Big League Weekend 11.00 Boxing 12.30pm Ryder Cup Countdown 2008 1.00 Speedway 3.00 Boxing 4.30 Carp Academy 2008 5.00 NFL: Total Access 6.00 European Seniors Tour Golf 7.00 LIVE Football: UEFA Champions League 10.30 Poker Million 12.30am NFL: Total Access 1.30 Revista De La Liga 2.30 European Seniors Tour Golf 3.30 Golf 4.30 Revista De La Liga
Sky Sports 3 11.00am Aerobics: Oz Style 11.30 Racing News 12.00pm Showjumping 1.00 Athletics: Great Yorkshire Run 1.30 Football: UEFA Champions League (x6) 4.30 Athletics: Great Yorkshire Run 5.00 WWE Smackdown 7.00 NFL 9.00 NFL: Total Access 10.00 Pool: World Pool Masters 11.00 X-Adventures 11.30 Hyundai A League 12.00am Football Asia 12.30 Pool: World Pool Masters 1.30 Sports Unlimited 2.30 Football Asia
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4.00pm Stargate Atlantis 5.00 American Gladiators 6.00 Malcolm in the Middle 6.30 Futurama 7.00 The Simpsons (x2) 8.00 Stargate Atlantis 9.00 UK Border Force 10.00 Prison Break 11.00 Inside: Predator Task Force 12.00am Road Wars (x2) 1.50 Miami Uncovered 2.40 Stargate SG-1
7.00pm The Real Hustle (x2) 8.00 Dog Borstal 9.00 Don’t Tell the Bride 10.00 EastEnders 10.30 How Not to Live Your Life 11.00 Family Guy (x2) 11.45 Don’t Tell the Bride 12.45am Dog Borstal 1.45 How Not to Live Your Life 2.15 The Real Hustle (x2) 3.15 Your Identity for Sale
7.00pm World News Today 7.30 Pop Go the Sixties 7.35 Batman 8.00 Wild China 9.00 That Mitchell and Webb Look 9.30 Flight of the Conchords. See highlights. 10.00 Only Connect 10.30 Saki: Who Killed Mrs De Ropp? 11.30 Mr Loveday’s Little Outing 12.00am The Edwardians in Colour1.00 Only Connect
4.30pm Sally Jessy Raphael 5.20 The Montel Williams Show 6.05 Judge Judy (x2) 7.00 Smallville 8.00 Katie & Peter: The Next Chapter 9.00 CelebAir 10.00 Katy Brand’s Big Ass Show 10.30 FILM: Mission: Impossible II (2000) 12.55am Entourage 1.25 Secret Diary of a Call Girl (x2) 2.20 Teleshopping
2.55pm Maigret 4.00 Daily Cooks Challenge 5.00 Goodnight Sweetheart 5.40 Film File 5.50 Heartbeat 6.55 The Wonder Years (x2) 8.00 Pie in the Sky 9.00 George Baker: Wexford and Me 9.05 Inspector Wexford: from Doon with Death 11.10 Profiling Ruth Rendell 12.10am Dempsey and Makepeace
4.25pm Hollyoaks 5.00 Friends (x2) 6.00 Scrubs (x2) 7.00 Hollyoaks 7.30 My Name is Earl 8.00 Friends (x2) 9.00 Smallville: Superman the Early Years (x2) 11.00 Skins 12.00am Scrubs (x2) 1.00 Gilmore Girls 1.45 Skins 2.45 Smallville: Superman the Early Years 3.25 My Name is Earl 3.50 Switched
6.05pm Deal or No Deal 7.00 Property Ladder 8.00 More4 News 8.30 The Daily Show with Jon Stewart 9.00 Embarrassing Illnesses (x2) 10.00 True Stories: Her Name is Sabine 11.50 Embarrassing Illnesses (x2) 12.55am True Stories: Her Name is Sabine 2.45 Countdown
1.45pm The Fix 2.00 Criminal Minds 3.00 Blood Ties 4.00 Charmed (x2) 6.00 Canada’s Next Top Model 7.00 Will and Grace (x2) 7.55 The Fix 8.00 America’s Next Top Model 9.00 Ghost Whisperer 10.00 Ghost Hunters International 11.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 12.00am Criminal Minds
UK TV Gold
Paramount
Discovery
Sci Fi
Sky Movies
Sky Movies
Film4
TCM
5.00pm As Time Goes By 5.40 My Family 6.20 The Good Life 7.00 Last of the Summer Wine 7.40 Keeping Up Appearances 8.20 Some Mothers Do ‘Ave ‘Em 9.00 Open All Hours 9.40 Porridge 10.20 The Good Life 11.00 Men Behaving Badly 11.40 I’m Alan Partridge 12.20am Open All Hours
3.00pm Two and a Half Men (x2) 4.00 The King of Queens (x2) 5.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (x2) 6.00 Frasier (x2) 7.00 Everybody Hates Chris (x2) 8.00 Two and a Half Men (x2) 10.00 Sex and the City (x2) 11.10 The King of Queens 11.40 Two and a Half Men (x2) 12.40am Celebrity Death Match (x2)
3.00pm Deadliest Catch 4.00 Time Team 5.00 Mythbusters 6.00 American Chopper 7.00 How Do They Do It? 7.30 How Stuff’s Made 8.00 Deadliest Catch (x2) 10.00 Killer Jellyfish 11.00 Couples Who Kill 12.00am Unsolved Murders 12.30 Crime Scene USA: Body of Evidence
12.05pm The Lost World 1.00 Quantum Leap 2.00 The Invisible Man 3.00 FILM: Locusts (2005) 5.00 Thunderbirds 6.05 Angel 7.00 The Invisible Man 8.00 Medium (x2) 10.00 FILM: Barb Wire (1996) 12.00am FILM: UKM: The Ultimate Killing Machine (2006) 1.50 Medium 3.00 Angel
2.40pm The Top 10 Show 3.00 Barefoot In The Park (1967) 5.00 The Great Moment (1944) 6.35 Modern Greats and Classics Close Up 7.05 Island In The Sky (1953) 9.00 In Cold Blood (1967) 11.15 Support Your Local Sheriff! (1969) 1.00am Safety Last (1923)
10.40am Fire (1996) 12.40pm Shakes The Clown (1992) 2.10 The Last Mogul: Life And Times Of Lew Wasserman (2005) 3.50 Fire (1996) 5.55 Best (1999) 7.45 Tell No One (2006) 10.00 Sex, Lies And Videotape (1989) 11.45 Body Count (1997) 1.15am 35mm
1.00pm Madeleine (1949) 3.20 The Return Of The Musketeers (1989) 5.20 Belles On Their Toes (1952) 7.10 Pineapple Express Special 7.15 Napoleon Dynamite (2004) 9.00 Witness (1985) Harrison Ford protects an Amish boy. 11.20 Being John Malkovich (1999) 1.35am Timecode (2000)
11.00am The Hard Way (1943) 1.00pm Young Bess (1953) 3.00 Little Women (1949) 5.10 The Last Time I Saw Paris (1954) 7.15 Marlowe (1969) 9.00 Coma (1978) 11.05 Savage Messiah (1972) 12.55am Hysteria (1965) 2.20 The Haunting (1963) 4.10 Clark Gable – Tall, Dark and Handsome
Classics
Indie
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wednesday 17 Celebrity Come Dine With Me Channel 4, 8pm How do you get Peter Stringfellow, Blue’s Lee Ryan, decorator Linda Barker and Liberty X-er Michelle Heaton in a room together – and cooking. Yes, they think they’re domesticated. Here’s a chance to find out who’s burnt the spag bol and who’s bashed out a soufflé.
The Family Channel 4, 9pm The original reality show returns, without the Hello deals and dressing up as your favourite pet tasks. This is a British family opening its doors to viewers documenting contemporary family life. So, kicking off we have mum Jane’s 40th birthday and teenager Emily’s party lifestyle heading to clash. Typical.
Blood and Guts: A History of Surgery BBC4, 9pm Michael Mosley takes on the grisley task of documenting the progression of surgery into the modern world. From the medieval torture chambers or barbarism, letting your blood drain the evil from your body, to the science of today creating beautiful monsters for Frankenstein.
terrestrial
sport
BBC1
BBC2
ITV1
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Five
Sky Sports 1
6.00am Breakfast 9.15 Helicopter Heroes 10.00 Homes Under the Hammer 11.00 Open House 11.30 Car Booty 12.15pm Bargain Hunt 1.00 BBC News 1.30 South East Today 1.45 Doctors 2.15 Diagnosis Murder 3.00 BBC News 3.05 Lazytown 3.30 Bear Behaving Badly 3.50 Eliot Kid 4.03 The Owl 4.05 Get 100 4.35 Do Something Different 5.00 Newsround 5.15 The Weakest Link 6.00 BBC News 6.30 South East Today 7.00 The One Show 7.30 Inside Out Surprising real-life stories from familiar places. Features the definitive map of the South East to show how rising sea levels mean you don’t need to live near the coast to end up underwater. Glug. 8.00 Sky Cops Series that follows the work of Britain’s helicopter police. 8.30 Trawlermen Documentary series about a group of trawler fishermen in Peterhead, Scotland. 9.00 Who Do You Think You Are? David Suchet embarks on a journey to find his family history. Some relations think his father’s father was German, others Russian, others Estonian. And when and why was their name changed from Suchedowitz to Suchet? Spies, the lot of ‘em! 10.00 BBC News 10.25 South East Today 10.33 BBC Weather 10.35 The National Lottery Draws 10.45 Medium Allison has a dream about the disappearance of Joe’s prospective employer’s daughter. 11.30 The Tudors Anne revives Henry’s passion for her. 12.20am Weatherview 12.25 Sign Zone: Alexei Sayle’s Liverpool 1.25 Tess of the D’Urbervilles 2.25 DIY SOS 2.55 Cash in the Celebrity Attic 3.40 Joins BBC News
6.00am Tikkabilla 6.30 Teletubbies 6.55 Tweenies Songtime 7.00 Dogstar 7.25 Newsround 7.30 Batfink 7.35 Trapped 8.05 Mortified 8.30 Bob the Builder: Project Build It 8.45 Boogie Beebies 9.00 Mister Maker 9.20 Something Special – Out and About 9.40 Little Red Tractor 9.55 Pingu 10.00 In the Night Garden 10.30 See Hear 11.00 The Daily Politics 12.50pm Paralympics 2008 4.00 Flog It! 4.30 Step Up to the Plate 5.15 Wanted Down Under 5.55 Party Conference Broadcast
6.00am GMTV 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 10.30 This Morning 11.15 ITV News and Weather 11.20 Meridian News and Weather 11.25 This Morning 12.30pm Loose Women 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News and Weather 2.00 60 Minute Makeover 3.00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 4.00 A Touch of Frost 5.00 Britain’s Best Dish
6.10am The Hoobs (x2) 7.00 Freshly Squeezed 7.30 Everybody Loves Raymond 8.00 Just Shoot Me 8.30 Will and Grace 8.55 Frasier (x2) 9.55 Without a Trace (x2) 11.55 3 Minute Wonder 12.00pm News at Noon 12.30 Property Ladder 1.35 FILM: Above Us The Waves (1956) 3.25 Countdown 4.15 Deal or No Deal 5.00 Wogan’s Perfect Recall 5.30 Come Dine with Me
6.00 – 9.00am Children’s television 9.00 The Wright Stuff 10.30 Trisha Goddard 11.30 Law and Order: Criminal Intent 12.30pm Five News 12.45 House 1.45 Neighbours 2.15 Home and Away 2.50 Picture Perfect Homes 3.00 FILM: Storm Chasers (1998) 5.00 Five News 5.30 Neighbours
6.00 Eggheads It’s quiz-time! 6.30 MasterChef the Professionals It’s finals week. The last two winners of the quarter finals go head to head for a place in the final three. Made to make your mouth water. 7.00 Paralympics 2008: Games Today Clare Balding and Steve Cram present action from the Paralympic competition in Beijing. Featuring highlights of the closing ceremony. 8.00 The Restaurant All eight restaurants open, but this time their customers will pay only what they think their meals and service are worth. It’s Raymond’s way of bringing the couples’ dreams down to earth. 9.00 Dawn Gets Naked Dawn Porter bares all in order to reveal how our idea of perfection has been perverted to fit the demands of the beauty industry. 10.00 Room 101 The show in which guests are given the opportunity to get rid of the things they hate. Bruce Forsyth suggests female television presenters who shout. 10.30 Newsnight 11.20 Today at Conference Andrew Neil presents highlights from the Liberal Democrat Party Conference. 11.50 Charley Boorman: Ireland to Sydney by Any Means 12.50am Joins BBC News 4.00 Black Peoples of the Americas 5.00 The World Since 1945
6.00 Meridian Tonight 6.30 ITV Evening News; Weather 6.55 Liberal Democrat Broadcast 7.00 Emmerdale Nicola gets her comeuppance at the book reading. The amount of comeuppances that girl’s had she could open a comeuppance shop. 7.30 Coronation Street Fiz starts to buckle under the pressure, as John plans their future. Bull. China shop. 8.00 The Bill After Norris’s trial for attempted rape and murder falls apart, a woman is attacked, but she didn’t see the rapist’s face. 9.00 Lost in Austen While visiting Jane and Mr Collins at Rosings, Amanda is unexpectedly invited to stay at Pemberley with Mr Darcy, causing her to wonder if he might be falling for her. But will she allow herself to fall in love with him, when he is destined to be with Elizabeth Bennet? Fate? Nookie? Tough choice. 10.00 News at Ten; Weather 10.35 Numb3rs A card-counting scam comes to the attention of Don and his team after a murder at a card club. Clubbed to death? Boom! Boom! 11.35 New Homes from Hell 12.30am Nightwatch with Steve Scott: Emergency 1.20 L.A Dragnet 2.10 Loose Women 3.00 The Jeremy Kyle Show 3.55 ITV Nightscreen 5.30 ITV Early Morning News
6.00 The Simpsons 6.30 Hollyoaks Lauren and Sasha are coming to terms with the fact that it is just them and Leo, following the recent departures. Uh oh. Not big on responsibility, any of them. 7.00 Channel 4 News 7.55 3 Minute Wonder 8.00 Celebrity Come Dine with Me See highlights. 9.00 The Family See highlights. 10.00 Desperate Housewives Drama series. Katherine and Bree decide to start a catering business. Lynette is in denial over her feelings for Rick. Mike finds out the truth about his accident. 11.00 The Family Another chance to see the opening episode of a major new eight-part observational series documenting family life, as a British family opens its doors to viewers. The Hughes family consists of mum Jane, dad Simon and their four teenage children, and were filmed around the clock. 12.05am 4Music Presents: Kings of Leon: Exclusive 12.10 4 Music: Ibiza Rocks with Sony Ericsson 12.40 4 Music: Bestival 2008 1.40 FILM: She’s So Lovely (1997) 3.20 Veronique 3.25 St Elsewhere 4.15 Tony Robinson’s Crime and Punishment 5.15 Countdown
6.00 Home and Away Ross and Morag tie the knot in style. More soap wedding action? 6.30 Animal Rescue Squad Susie the parrot is rescued from a life behind bars. She has hit adolescence and is behaving like a teenage tearaway. Sick parrot. 7.00 Five News 7.30 It Pays to Watch Magazine series in which consumer affairs expert Martin Lewis offers helpful advice on saving money. 8.00 Axe Men Series following the work of North American lumberjacks as they risk their lives to cut timber whilst battling mechanical failures, unpredictable terrain and falling trees. Not mega guitarists. 9.00 FILM: Resident Evil: Apocalypse (2004) Starring Milla Jovovich. Science-fiction sequel based on the successful video game series. The Hive has been re-opened leading to the contamination of Raccoon City by another plague of zombies. Not another one! 10.55 Police Interceptors Documentary series profiling the work of a high-speed police interception unit in Essex. 11.55 PartyPoker.com World Open IV 1.25am Major League Baseball 4.20 FIM Motocross 5.10 Neighbours 5.35 Home and Away
6.00am Good Morning Sports Fans (x4) 9.00 Ryder Cup Countdown 2008 9.30 Golf: How the 2004 Ryder Cup Was Won 11.30 Ryder Cup Countdown 2008 12.30pm Revista De La Liga 1.00 Ryder Cup Countdown 2008 1.30 NFL: Total Access 2.30 European Seniors Tour Golf: Weston Homes PGA International 3.30 Ryder Cup Countdown 2008 4.00 Golf: How The 2004 Ryder Cup Was Won 6.00 Total Rugby 6.30 Ryder Cup Countdown 2008 7.30 Gillette Soccer Special 10.00 Ryder Cup Countdown 2008 11.00 Total Rugby 11.30 Ryder Cup Special: Three in a Row 1.30am Ryder Cup Countdown 2008 2.30 Golf: Ryder Cup Special – Three in a Row 4.30 Boots ‘n’ All 5.30 Total Rugby
Sky Sports 2 6.00am Aerobics: Oz Style 6.30 X-Adventures 7.00 WWE Vintage Collection 8.00 European Seniors Tour Golf 9.00 Hyundai A League 9.30 Football Asia 10.00 Pool: World Pool Masters 11.00 Poker Million 1.00pm Pool: World Pool Masters 2.00 Sports Unlimited 3.00 Motor Racing: Caterham Eurocup 3.30 X-Adventures 4.00 Powerboating 4.30 NFL: Total Access 5.30 FIFA Futbol Mundial 6.00 LIVE Football: UEFA Champions League 11.00 NFL: Total Access 12.00am Boots ‘n’ All 1.00 Showjumping 2.00 Boots ‘n’ All 3.00 Watersports World
Sky Sports 3 11.00am Hyundai A League 11.30 Racing News 12.00pm Sports Unlimited 1.00 Football: UEFA Champions League (x8) 5.00 WWE The Bottom Line 6.00 WWE Afterburn 7.00 X-Adventures 7.30 Football: UEFA Champions League 10.00 Boots ‘n’ All 11.00 FIFA Futbol Mundial 11.30 Showjumping 12.30am Kartmasters Grand Prix 1.30 Everyday Is Raceday: Touring Car Diaries 2.00 Trans World Sport 3.00 Poker Million Victoria Nangle
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1.00pm Project Catwalk 2.00 Bones 3.00 Cold Case 4.00 Stargate Atlantis 5.00 Soccer AM: The Best Bits 6.00 Malcolm in the Middle 6.30 Futurama 7.00 The Simpsons (x2) 8.00 Don’t Forget the Lyrics 9.00 Wives 10.00 FILM: Rocky III (1982) 11.55 Road Wars (x2) 1.50am Miami Uncovered
7.00pm The Real Hustle (x2) 8.00 Dog Borstal 9.00 FILM: National Treasure (2004) 11.00 Family Guy (x2) 11.45 Dog Borstal 12.45am How Not to Live Your Life 1.15 Don’t Tell the Bride 2.15 The Real Hustle (x2) 3.15 Dawn Gets a Baby
7.00pm World News Today 7.30 Pop Go the Sixties 7.35 Batman 8.00 Life in Cold Blood 9.00 Blood and Guts: A History of Surgery. See highlights. 10.00 FILM: L’enfant (2005) 11.30 Blood And Guts: A History of Surgery 12.30am Medical Mavericks 1.30 Doctors to Be: 20 Years On (x2) 2.30 Medical Mavericks
1.00pm Airline USA 1.30 The Jeremy Kyle Show (x2) 3.45 The Ricki Lake Show 4.30 Sally Jessy Raphael 5.20 The Montel Williams Show 6.05 Judge Judy (x2) 7.00 Hell’s Kitchen USA (x2) 9.00 FILM: Mission: Impossible II (2000) 11.25 Coronation Street 11.55 CelebAir 12.55am Katy Brand’s Big Ass Show
8.00pm Agatha Christie’s Poirot 9.00 Celebrating... The South Bank Show 9.35 Celebrating... The South Bank Show 10.00 George Baker: Wexford and Me 10.05 Inspector Wexford: The Mouse in the Corner 12.10am Agatha Christie’s Poirot 1.15 Maigret 2.10 Dempsey and Makepeace 3.00 Cagney and Lacey
3.30pm Gilmore Girls 4.25 Hollyoaks 5.00 Friends (x2) 6.00 Scrubs (x2) 7.00 Hollyoaks 7.30 My Name is Earl 8.00 Friends (x2) 9.00 The Big Bang Theory (x2) 10.00 Fonejacker 10.30 Rick & Steve: The Happiest Gay Couple in all the World 11.00 When Women Rule The World 12.05am Scrubs (x2)
4.00pm A Place in the Sun 4.30 Location, Location, Location 5.35 Kirstie and Phil’s Property Guide 6.05 Deal or No Deal 7.00 Property Ladder 8.00 More4 News 8.30 The Daily Show 9.00 Father Ted (x2) 10.00 The IT Crowd (x2) 11.10 Dispatches: What’s in Your Wine? 12.10am Father Ted
1.45pm The Fix 2.00 Criminal Minds 3.00 Blood Ties 4.00 Charmed (x2) 6.00 Canada’s Next Top Model 7.00 Will and Grace (x2) 7.55 The Fix 8.00 Grey’s Anatomy 9.00 Dirty Dancing: The Time of Your Life 10.30 CSI: Miami 11.30 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 12.30am Paranormal State
UK TV Gold
Paramount
Discovery
Sci Fi
Sky Movies
Sky Movies
Film4
TCM
5.00pm As Time Goes By 5.40 My Family 6.20 Keeping Up Appearances 7.00 Last of the Summer Wine 7.40 Dinnerladies 8.20 Some Mothers Do ‘Ave ‘Em 9.00 Open All Hours 9.40 Porridge 10.20 The Royle Family 11.00 Men Behaving Badly 11.40 I’m Alan Partridge 12.20am The Royle Family
3.00pm Two and a Half Men (x2) 4.00 The King of Queens (x2) 5.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (x2) 6.00 Frasier (x2) 7.00 Everybody Hates Chris (x2) 8.00 Two and a Half Men (x2) 9.00 Scrubs (x2) 10.00 Sex and the City (x2) 11.15 The King of Queens 11.45 Scrubs 12.15am Stacked 12.45 Celebrity Death Match
4.00pm Time Team 5.00 Mythbusters 6.00 American Chopper 7.00 How Do They Do It? 7.30 New Series Preview: Autumn Line-Up 8.00 Deadliest Catch 9.00 Chasing Churchill 10.00 Egypt’s Top Ten Mysteries 11.00 Couples Who Kill 12.00am Unsolved Murders 12.30 Crime Scene USA
12.05pm The Lost World 1.00 Quantum Leap 2.00 The Invisible Man 3.00 FILM: Big (1988) 5.00 Thunderbirds 6.05 Angel 7.00 The Invisible Man 8.00 FILM: Cocoon (1985) 10.20 FILM: Session 9 (2001) 12.20am FILM: Dracula II: Ascension (2003) 2.00 Angel 3.00 The Stand
2.30pm King Kong Vs Godzilla (1962) 4.10 King Kong Escapes (1968) 6.00 White Savage (1943) 7.30 The Palm Beach Story (1942) 9.00 The Bridges At Toko-Ri (1954) 10.50 It Came From Outer Space (1953) 12.20am Modern Greats and Classics Close Up
12.45pm Volver (2006) 2.45 Nina’s Heavenly Delights (2006) 4.25 The Page Turner (2006) 5.55 Tube Tales (1999) 7.35 The Top 10 Show 7.50 Pangea Day Highlights 8.20 The Escapist (2001) 10.00 The Good German (2005) 11.50 Volver (2006) 1.55am Nina’s Heavenly Delights (2006)
1.00pm The Return Of The Musketeers (1989) 3.00 The Left Hand Of God (1955) 4.45 Geronimo (1962) 6.50 The Perfect Catch (2005) 6.55 Pineapple Express Special 9.00 Mr & Mrs Smith (2005) Brangelina’s marriage conselling. 11.15 Personal Services (1987) 1.20am Election (2005)
8.55am Little Women (1949) 11.05 Rose Marie (1954) 1.00pm It Started With A Kiss (1959) 3.00 The Time Machine (1960) 4.55 2010 (1984) 7.05 Butterfield 8 (1960) 9.00 Catholic Boys (1985) 10.50 Pennies From Heaven (1981) 12.45am Lolita (1962) 3.25 The Sea Wolf (1941) 5.00 Silver River (1948)
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045_LS390_TV_Thur
9/11/08
3:15 PM
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thursday 18 Mock The Week BBC2, 9pm Don’t want to get left behind in booking your tickets to the Paramount Comedy Festival this year? Then use tonight’s satirical swipe at the news as an audition to help you decide who to see in October. Choose from host Dara O’Briain, or panelists Frankie Boyle, Russell Howard, Andy Parsons and Michael McIntyre.
Ann Widdecombe Versus Girl Gangs ITV1, 9pm Remember when being beaten up by a girl was a rarity? Alright, so there was always one in the playground but now there’s been a recent jump in female crime and Ms Widdecombe is on the case to find out why. Hitting the streets of and talking to gang members, will she find an answer?
Samantha Who? E4, 10pm Remember a sweet film in the 90s called Regarding Henry? It starred Harrison Ford as a ruthless businessman who experiences amnesia and takes another look at his life from a new perspective. Now imagine it’s a comedy. And Christina Applegate has taken over the main role. No need – here it is.
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6.00am Breakfast 9.15 Helicopter Heroes 10.00 Homes Under The Hammer 11.00 Open House 11.30 Car Booty 12.15pm Bargain Hunt 1.00 BBC News 1.30 South East Today 1.45 Doctors 2.15 Diagnosis Murder 3.00 BBC News 3.05 Lazytown 3.30 Bear Behaving Badly 3.50 Eliot Kid 4.03 The Owl 4.05 Young Dracula 4.35 Beat The Boss 5.00 Newsround 5.15 The Weakest Link
6.00 – 10.00am Children’s television 10.00 In The Night Garden 10.30 Big Barn Farm 10.45 Get Squiggling 11.00 The Maths Channel 11.10 Let’s Write A Story 11.30 Something Special 11.45 What? Where? When? Why? 12.00pm The Daily Politics 12.30 Working Lunch 1.00 Out Of The Blue 1.25 Coast: Strangford Lough And Torr Head 1.30 Open Gardens 2.00 Sun, Sea And Bargain Spotting 3.00 Murder, She Wrote 3.45 Flog It! 4.30 Step Up To The Plate 5.15 Wanted Down Under
6.00am GMTV 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 10.30 This Morning 11.15 ITV News And Weather 11.20 Meridian News And Weather 11.25 This Morning 12.30pm Loose Women 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News And Weather 2.00 60 Minute Makeover 3.00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 4.00 A Touch Of Frost 5.00 Britain’s Best Dish
6.00am The Treacle People 6.10 The Hoobs (x2) 7.00 Freshly Squeezed 7.30 Everybody Loves Raymond 8.00 Just Shoot Me 8.30 Will And Grace 8.55 Frasier (x2) 9.55 Without A Trace 10.55 Without A Trace 11.55 3 Minute Wonder 12.00pm News At Noon 12.30 Property Ladder 1.30 Will And Grace 1.55 FILM: Out Of The Clouds (1955) 3.25 Countdown 4.15 Deal Or No Deal 5.00 Wogan’s Perfect Recall 5.30 Come Dine With Me
6.00 – 9.00am Children’s television 9.00 The Wright Stuff 10.30 Trisha Goddard 11.30 Law And Order: Criminal Intent 12.30pm Five News 12.45 House 1.45 Neighbours 2.15 Home And Away 2.50 Picture Perfect Homes 3.05 Five News Update 3.10 UEFA Cup Football 5.25 Neighbours 5.55 UEFA Cup Football
6.00 BBC News 6.30 South East Today 7.00 The One Show 7.30 EastEnders Tanya tries to get to the root of what is bothering Abi and Stacey is left holding the baby. Stacey’s forgiven for being a scarlet woman and on babysitting duties then? Only in the Square. 7.57 BBC News; Regional News 8.00 The Planners Are Coming Charles believed that a house built on his parents’ land within the greenbelt would never be allowed, so he turned a wood cabin into his home without planning permission. 8.30 Accidental Heroes Series documenting real-life stories of bravery and courage. 9.00 Motorway Cops – A Traffic Cops Special The Motorway Cops come face-to-face with their worst – pedestrians and a 44 tonne lorry. 10.00 BBC News 10.25 South East Today 10.33 BBC Weather 10.35 Question Time David Dimbleby chairs the weekly political debate from London. 11.35 This Week 12.20am Holiday Weatherview 12.25 Sign Zone: Panorama 12.55 Would Like To Meet Again 1.25 Countryfile 2.25 Cash In The Celebrity Attic 3.10 Joins BBC News
6.00 Eggheads Can your brain still function after a day at work? Find out with a quiz. 6.30 Masterchef The Professionals It’s the penultimate show and only three chefs are left. They face two challenges: first they must create an amuse bouche and petit fours and then they have to cook for five top restaurateurs. 7.00 Who Do You Think You Are? Ainsley Harriott heads to the West Indies to uncover his roots and discovers that Caribbean history isn’t quite as clear as he’d imagined. 8.00 The Restaurant After opening night three couples find themselves in Raymond’s challenge. But they have no idea what it will be. 9.00 Mock The Week See highlights. 9.30 The Cup Comedy series. The Under 11s Cup in Birmingham brings out the best in the team and the worst in their parents. 10.00 Never Mind The Buzzcocks Comedy pop quiz hosted by Simon Amstell with team captains Bill Bailey and Phill Jupitus. May involve comments you don’t want your kids to hear but thoroughly enjoy yourself. 10.30 Newsnight 11.20 Bruce Parry’s Amazon 12.20am How I Met Your Mother 12.45 How I Met Your Mother 1.05 Joins BBC News 4.00 Class Clips
6.00 Meridian Tonight 6.30 ITV Evening News; Weather 7.00 Emmerdale Jo is forced to lie to protect herself from Andy. Does anyone remember when he was the good, reasonable brother? 8.00 The Bill A young suspected shoplifter, Charlie, is brought in for questioning. Forged banknotes are found in his pockets and Gina is alarmed to see bruising all over him. Charlie eventually opens up and admits that he took the forged notes from his violent aunt Elaine Marshall. 9.00 Ann Widdecombe Versus Girl Gangs See highlights. 10.00 News At Ten; Weather 10.40 Customs UK In Bristol, customs officer Ann catches three passengers with 87 kilos of tobacco worth thousands of pounds, but will the smuggler be able to control his temper? Will it be a zen smuggler? Plenty of zen needed around here. 11.10 Focus Is it right for the public to give money to beggars – or are we actually doing more harm than good? Debbie Thrower investigates. 11.40 Love And War More wartime stories of love with Peter Williams. 12.10am Bingo Night Live 1.15 Motorsport UK 1.40 Nightwatch With Steve Scott 2.35 Loose Women 3.20 The Jeremy Kyle Show 4.15 ITV Nightscreen 5.30 ITV Early Morning News
6.00 The Simpsons 6.30 Hollyoaks When John Paul tells Niall he may move home to be with Craig, Niall laces his beer with a lethal amount of drugs. He’s Mickey Finn car-azzy that Niall. 7.00 Channel 4 News 7.55 3 Minute Wonder 8.00 Chateau Monty After a big falling out with Monty, his assistant Linzie returns to France, only to be left home alone. 8.30 The Great Italian Escape Sarah’s mother arrives, with plans to stay through the summer, and possibly longer. But it is no holiday. 9.00 The Ambulance: 8 Minutes To Disaster Doc following the staff of the Reading Ambulance Service, as they attempt to meet Government targets to reach 75 per cent of lifethreatening calls within eight minutes. 10.00 8 Out Of 10 Cats Jimmy Carr presents the topical panel show. 10.35 When Women Rule The World Reality series. 11.40 Alan Carr’s Celebrity Ding Dong Comedian Alan Carr hosts an entertainment show. 12.30am 4 Music: Bestival 2008 1.40 4 Music: JD Set Presents The Courteeners 1.55 Vincent Vincent And The Villains 2.10 FILM: Khosla Ka Ghosla (2006) 4.25 St Elsewhere 5.15 Countdown
8.00 UEFA Cup Football Live UEFA Cup football action from the first round of the group stage as Everton play host to Belgian club Standard Liege. Colin Murray presents, while Dave Woods commentates. Kick-off is at 20.05. Drink-off likely to start at 18.05. Up to you really. Don’t forget your curry afterwards. 10.10 FILM: Revolver (2005) Starring Jason Statham, Ray Liotta, Vincent Pastore, Andre Benjamin and Francesca Annis. Complex crime thriller. A conman is released from prison after seven years inside for a crime he did not commit. Intent on revenge before a terminal disease kills him, he plays poker with the gangster responsible and beats him comprehensively. Having humiliated his antagonist and won his money, the remaining question is what will kill him first – the disease or the gangster’s heavies? Maybe he should’ve got a second opinion before embarking upon this terribly risky series of events. Could’ve been a swatted mosquito on the x-ray is all we’re saying. 12.25am Quiz Call 4.00 Major League Soccer 4.45 Wildlife SOS 5.10 Neighbours 5.35 Home And Away
6.00am Good Morning Sports Fans (x4) 9.00 Ryder Cup Countdown 2008 10.00 Ryder Cup Special: Three In A Row 12.00pm Ryder Cup Countdown 2008 1.00 Total Rugby 1.30 Ryder Cup Special 3.30 History Of The Ryder Cup 5.00 Ryder Cup Official Film - 2006 6.30 European Tour Weekly 7.00 History Of The Ryder Cup 8.30 LIVE Golf: Ryder Cup 10.30 Ryder Cup Official Film - 2006 12.00am History Of The Ryder Cup 1.30 European Tour Weekly 2.00 Ryder Cup Official Film – 2006 3.30 European Tour Weekly 4.00 History Of The Ryder Cup 5.30 European Tour Weekly
Sky Sports 2 6.00am Aerobics: Oz Style 6.30 XAdventures 7.00 WWE Experience 8.00 Kartmasters Grand Prix 9.00 Showjumping 10.00 Boots ‘n’ All 11.00 Trans World Sport 12.00pm Showjumping 1.00 Kartmasters Grand Prix 2.00 Trans World Sport 3.00 FIFA Futbol Mundial 3.30 Total Rugby 4.00 Motor Racing: Caterham Eurocup 4.30 NFL: Total Access 5.30 The Rugby Club 7.00 Barclays Premier League World 7.30 LIVE Premier League Snooker 11.00 NFL: Total Access 12.00am Barclays Premier League World 12.30 The Rugby Club 2.00 ATP Tennis Magazine 2.30 Poker 4.30 The Dogs 5.00 British BMX Championships 2008
Sky Sports 3 9.00am Watersports 10.00 FIFA Futbol Mundial 10.30 X-Adventures 11.00 Aerobics: Oz Style 11.30 Racing News 12.00pm Boots ‘n’ All 1.00 NFL: Total Access 2.00 FIFA Futbol Mundial 2.30 Total Rugby 3.00 Showjumping 4.00 Trans World Sport 5.00 WWE Vintage Collection 6.00 Irish Showjumping Premier Series 6.30 ATP Tennis Magazine 7.00 IAAF Athletix Weekly 7.30 LIVE Rugby League 9.30 WWE Late Night Raw 11.30 Extreme Championship Wrestling 12.30am Motor Sport Victoria Nangle
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12.00pm Stargate Atlantis 1.00 Project Catwalk 2.00 Bones 3.00 Cold Case 4.00 Stargate Atlantis 5.00 Don’t Forget The Lyrics 6.00 Malcolm In The Middle 6.30 Futurama 7.00 The Simpsons (x4) 9.00 Bones 10.00 Road Wars 11.00 Wives 12.00am Road Wars (x2) 1.50 Inside: America’s Toughest Jail
7.00pm The Real Hustle (x2) 8.00 Don’t Tell The Bride 9.00 The World’s Strictest Parents 10.00 EastEnders 10.30 The Wrong Door 11.00 Family Guy (x2) 11.45 The World’s Strictest Parents 12.45am Don’t Tell The Bride 1.45 The Wrong Door 2.15 The Real Hustle (x2)
7.00pm World News Today 7.30 Fossil Detectives 8.00 Archaelogy - Digging The Past: Timeshift 9.00 Casualty 1907 10.00 Blood And Guts: A History Of Surgery 11.00 BBC Four Sessions (x2) 1.00am Fossil Detectives 1.30 Journeys From The Centre Of The Earth 2.30 Fossil Detectives
5.20pm The Montel Williams Show 6.05 Judge Judy (x2) 7.00 CelebAir 8.00 The Fashion Show 9.00 Katie & Peter: The Next Chapter 10.00 Secret Diary Of A Call Girl 10.30 No Heroics 11.00 Entourage 11.30 FILM: Terminator 2: Judgment Day (1991) 2.10am Katie & Peter: The Next Chapter
5.00pm Goodnight Sweetheart 5.40 Film File 5.50 Heartbeat 6.55 The Wonder Years (x2) 8.00 The Adventures Of Sherlock Holmes 9.00 George Baker - Wexford And Me 9.05 Ruth Rendell’s Inspector Wexford 11.20 Profiling Ruth Rendell 12.20am The Adventures Of Sherlock Holmes 1.20 Maigret
1.45pm One Tree Hill 2.35 The OC 3.30 Gilmore Girls 4.25 Hollyoaks 5.00 Friends (x2) 6.00 Scrubs (x2) 7.00 Hollyoaks 7.30 My Name Is Earl 8.00 Friends (x2) 9.00 Ugly Betty 10.00 Samantha Who?. See highlights. 10.30 Crowned 11.30 Sunset Tan 12.00am Scrubs (x2) 1.00 Gilmore Girls 1.50 Sunset Tan
6.05pm Deal Or No Deal 7.00 Property Ladder 8.00 More4 News 8.30 The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 9.00 Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA 10.00 Without A Trace (x2) 12.00am Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA 1.00 Without A Trace (x2) 2.45 Countdown 3.50 Close
1.45pm The Fix 2.00 Criminal Minds 3.00 Blood Ties 4.00 Charmed (x2) 6.00 Canada’s Next Top Model 7.00 Will And Grace (x2) 7.55 The Fix 8.00 Criminal Minds 9.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 10.00 Grey’s Anatomy 11.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 12.00am Criminal Minds 1.00 Will And Grace
UK TV Gold
Paramount
Discovery
Sci Fi
Sky Movies
Sky Movies
Film4
TCM
4.00pm The Two Ronnies 5.00 As Time Goes By 5.40 My Family 6.20 Keeping Up Appearances 7.00 Last Of The Summer Wine 7.40 Dinnerladies 8.20 Some Mothers Do ‘Ave ‘Em 9.00 When Were We Funniest? 11.00 Men Behaving Badly 11.40 I’m Alan Partridge 12.20am The Royle Family 1.00 Columbo
4.00am The King Of Queens (x2) 5.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (x2) 6.00 Frasier (x2) 7.00 Everybody Hates Chris (x2) 8.00 Two And A Half Men (x2) 9.00 Everybody Hates Chris (x2) 10.00 Sex And The City (x2) 11.15 The King Of Queens 11.45 Everybody Hates Chris (x2) 12.45 Celebrity Death Match (x2)
2.00pm Crime Scene USA (x2) 3.00 Deadliest Catch 4.00 Time Team 5.00 Mythbusters 6.00 American Chopper 7.00 How Do They Do It? 7.30 How Stuff’s Made 8.00 My Shocking Story (x2) 10.00 Deranged Killers 11.00 Couples Who Kill 12.00am Unsolved Murders 12.30 Crime Scene USA
12.05pm The Lost World 1.00 Quantum Leap 2.00 The Invisible Man 3.00 FILM: Termination Point (2007) 5.00 Thunderbirds 6.05 Angel 7.00 The Invisible Man 8.00 Medium 9.00 Tin Man 10.50 FILM: Highlander (1986) 1.00am FILM: Frozen Impact (2002) 3.00 Angel 4.00 The Lost World 5.00 Angel
8.30am The Man Who Knew Too Much (1956) 10.35 Topaz (1969) 1.00pm Samson And Delilah (1949) 3.10 Holiday Inn (1942) 4.55 Julius Caesar (1970) 6.55 The Man Who Knew Too Much (1956) 9.00 Barbarella (1968) 10.40 The Innocents (1961) 12.25am The Top 10 Show
11.05am Warrior King (2005) 1.00pm Stranger Than Fiction (2006) 2.55 Remnants Of Everest: The 1996 Tragedy (2007) 4.45 Ten Canoes (2006) 6.25 Still Crazy (1998) 8.05 Stranger Than Fiction (2006) 10.00 La Vie En Rose (2006) 12.25am Infamous (2006)
1.00pm A Kid For Two Farthings (1955) 2.50 How To Marry A Millionaire (1953) Marilyn stars. 4.45 Revenge Of The Pink Panther (1978) 6.45 Pineapple Express Special 6.50 Mighty Joe Young (1998) 9.00 Brokeback Mountain (2004) 11.35 Sleepy Hollow (1999) 1.40am Final Cut (2004)
9.00am The Time Machine (1960) 10.50 Song Of Love (1947) 1.00pm Ada (1961) 3.00 An American In Paris (1951) 5.00 The Swan (1956) 6.55 Meet Me In Las Vegas (1956) 9.00 Batman (1989) 11.15 The Fearless Vampire Killers (1967) 1.15am Children Of The Damned (1964) 2.55 Trial (1955)
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9/10/08
11:13 AM
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friday 19 Beating Backache: Tonight ITV1, 8pm Doesn’t necessarily sound scintillating but with up to 80 per cent of the population suffering at some point with their backs it’s probably the reason you fancied staying in on a Friday night anyway. Chronic sufferer Jonathan Maitland looks at why more of us are doubling over and how lifestyles could be the clue.
Ricky Gervais: Fame Channel 4, 10pm The man himself brought this show to the Brighton Centre twice, and now’s everyone else’s chance to catch up with the Hollywood darling’s ponderings on the trappings of fame. This was the fastest-selling live comedy tour in UK history and stays true to Gervais’ cutting, and very funny, humour.
The X Factor ITV2, 7pm Catch up on last Saturday’s hopefuls in readiness for tomorrow’s new batch. This lot were testing the natural Welsh valleys’ vocal gifts by trawling through the hopefuls of Cardiff. See Simon wince, Cheryl smile sweetly, Dannii tell it like it is and Louis develop even more eccentricities. Dig in.
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6.00am Breakfast 9.15 Helicopter Heroes 10.00 Homes Under The Hammer 11.00 Open House 11.30 Car Booty 12.15pm Bargain Hunt 1.00 BBC News 1.30 South East Today 1.45 Doctors 2.15 Diagnosis Murder 3.00 BBC News 3.05 Lazytown 3.30 Bear Behaving Badly 3.50 Uncle Max 4.03 The Owl 4.05 The Revenge Files Of Alistair Fury 4.35 Sorry, I’ve Got No Head 5.00 Newsround 5.15 The Weakest Link
6.00am Tikkabilla 6.30 Teletubbies 6.55 Tweenies Songtime 7.00 Dogstar 7.25 Newsround 7.30 Batfink 7.35 Best Of Friends 8.05 Mortified 8.30 Bob The Builder: Project Build It 8.45 Boogie Beebies 9.00 Mister Maker 9.20 Something Special – Out And About 9.40 Little Red Tractor 9.55 Pingu 10.00 In The Night Garden 10.30 Big Barn Farm 10.45 Get Squiggling 11.00 Tennis: Davis Cup 2.30pm Sun, Sea And Bargain Spotting 3.00 Murder, She Wrote 3.45 Flog It! 4.30 Step Up To The Plate 5.15 Wanted Down Under 6.00 Eggheads It’s the weekend! Do you know the answers to this quiz? Do you care? Welcome weekend. 6.30 Masterchef: The Professionals It’s the final show. First the three finalists have to cook for 30 of the best chefs in Europe and three former Michelin inspectors. Then they have to cook their best three-course meal in the Masterchef kitchen and the champion is crowned. Plan your dinner well. 7.30 An Island Parish Chronicle of life in the parish of the Isles of Scilly. 8.00 Mastermind Tonight’s subjects are: The Life of Noor-Inayet Khan; Ferdinand Magellan; Edith Wharton and the Mod Movement in Britain. 8.30 Gardeners’ World Autumnal preparations from Toby Buckland. 9.00 The Tudors While Henry’s foreign foes conspire, his own acts at court, and on the jousting field, endanger his family’s future far more. 9.50 Coast Stornoway. 10.00 QI Stephen Fry chairs the almost impossible quiz. 10.30 Newsnight 11.00 Newsnight Review 11.35 Later...with Jools Holland Metallica, Carla Bruni, Kings of Leon and Nicole Atkins. 12.35am Metallica: A Culture Show Special 1.10 Star Trek: The Next Generation 2.40 FILM: Horror Hospital (1973) 4.05 How I Met Your Mother US (x2)
6.00am GMTV 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 10.30 This Morning 11.15 ITV News And Weather 11.20 Meridian News And Weather 11.25 This Morning 12.30pm Loose Women 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News And Weather 2.00 60 Minute Makeover 3.00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 4.00 A Touch Of Frost 5.00 Britain’s Best Dish
6.00am The Treacle People 6.10 The Hoobs (x2) 7.00 Freshly Squeezed 7.30 Everybody Loves Raymond 8.00 Just Shoot Me 8.25 Will And Grace 8.55 Frasier (x2) 9.55 Without A Trace (x2) 11.55 3 Minute Wonder 12.00pm News At Noon 12.30 Property Ladder 1.35 FILM: The Good Die Young (1954) 3.25 Countdown 4.15 Deal Or No Deal 5.00 Wogan’s Perfect Recall 5.30 Come Dine With Me
6.00 – 9.00am Children’s television 9.00 The Wright Stuff 10.30 Trisha Goddard 11.30 Law And Order: Criminal Intent 12.30pm Five News 12.45 House 1.45 Neighbours 2.15 Home And Away 2.50 Picture Perfect Homes 3.05 Five News Update 3.10 FILM: Forget Me Never (1999) 5.00 Five News 5.30 Neighbours
6.00am Good Morning Sports Fans (x3) 9.00 Ryder Cup Official Film – 2006 10.30 History Of The Ryder Cup 12.00pm LIVE Golf: Ryder Cup 6.00 LIVE Golf: Ryder Cup 12.00am Super League 2.00 Big League Weekend 3.00 Off The Bar 3.30 Barclays Premier League Preview 4.00 Super League
6.00 The Simpsons 6.30 Hollyoaks Michaela takes drastic action against Zoe but is shocked when Mike ignores her in favour of his injured girlfriend. Well, dur. Stop being an extreme McQueen. 7.00 Channel 4 News 7.35 My Boyfriend, The Suffolk Strangler Tanya Freedman’s film about the life of Pam Wright, whose partner was sentenced to life imprisonment for the murders of five women from the Ipswich area. 8.00 A Place In The Sun: Home Or Away John and Gill Farquas Blake – real name, not kidding – decide whether to upgrade to a large family house, or live in the moment and purchase a holiday home. 9.00 Ugly Betty Amanda and Marc try to make contact with Amanda’s biological father. 10.00 Ricky Gervais: Fame See highlights. 11.05 Derren Brown: Messiah 12.10am T-Mobile Transmission 1.10 4 Music: Orange Rockcorps 1.20 4Play: Ladyhawke 1.35 Orange Rockcorps 1.50 JD Set Presents Make Model 2.00 Dangerous Jobs For Girls 3.00 3 Minute Wonder 3.05 Goalissimo! 4.00 Trans World Sport 4.50 Southampton Boat Show 5.15 Countdown
6.00 Home And Away Roman worries about Nicole’s future. Short pop career and then panto? 6.30 Home And Away Belle’s attempts to seduce Aden fall flat. He’s got experience at rejecting seduction. 7.00 Five News 7.30 The What In The World? Quiz Marcus Brigstocke presents the comedy panel show with team captains Lee Hurst and Dominic Holland. Two teams go head to head over four rounds of scientific questions and challenges. Silly scientific but definitely based in fact somewhere. 8.00 Axe Men Series following the work of North American lumberjacks who risk their lives to cut timber. 9.00 NCIS A female petty officer is found dead at a local bikini contest, prompting the team to investigate. 10.00 Law and Order: Special Victims Unit A career con artist, forger and thief turns to murder and paedophilia to populate the cult he created and gain access to a multimillion dollar trust fund. As you do. 11.00 Law and Order Briscoe and Green think they have found the killer of a salesman who was bludgeoned to death, but there’s more to it. 12.00am Quiz Call 4.25 Game Ranger Diaries 5.10 Neighbours 5.35 Home And Away
6.00 BBC News 6.30 South East Today 7.00 The One Show 7.30 A Question Of Sport Fastpaced entertaining sports quiz. 7.57 BBC News; Regional News 8.00 EastEnders Tanya takes a big risk in trying to discover the truth about Jack’s past. Will she find the pictures of when he was in The Bill? 8.30 DIY SOS Nick Knowles and the DIY SOS team are in Gosport to help Cathy Walton, whose partner died in a freak accident having just started work on their new home. It’s enough to make Simon Bates weep. 9.00 Harry And Paul Harry Enfield and Paul Whitehouse are back with a whole new range of characters. 9.30 The Best Of Would I Lie To You? Highlights and unseen footage from the comedy panel show. 10.00 BBC News 10.25 South East Today 10.33 BBC Weather 10.35 Friday Night With Jonathan Ross Celebrity chat show hosted by Jonathan Ross. Guests are Ben Stiller, Girls Aloud star and X Factor lady Cheryl Cole and Paul O’Grady. 11.35 National Lottery EuroMillions Draw 11.40 Golf: Ryder Cup Highlights 1.10am Weatherview 1.15 Sign Zone: SuperDoctors 2.15 Street Doctor 2.45 Joins BBC News
6.00 Meridian Tonight 6.30 ITV Evening News; Weather 7.00 Emmerdale Jo is wracked with guilt as Andy spreads the news of her pregnancy. Was she watching Hollyoaks when she came up with this particular cunning scam? 7.30 Coronation Street Carla tempts smitten Liam further into her web. She’s got drag queen spite that one. 8.00 Beating Backache: Tonight See highlights. 8.30 Coronation Street John sees red and draws Rosie to the edge. She a big U2 fan? Sorry, that’s The Edge. 9.00 Wire In The Blood When new team member DC Collins receives a shocking token from the killer, Tony forces him to confess that he had a relationship with the killer’s latest victim, making him a potential target. The investigation moves into the shady sado-masochistic underbelly of Bradfield. Nasty. 10.00 Al Murray’s Happy Hour Tonight the pub landlord is joined for a pint by award-winning actor Ted Danson, Ross Kemp; and R’n’B sensation Estelle. 11.00 The Late News; Weather 11.45 Bingo Night Live 12.50am Nightwatch With Steve Scott: Mystery 1.45 FILM: The Hand That Rocks The Cradle (1992) 3.35 ITV Nightscreen 5.30 ITV Early Morning News
Sky Sports 2 6.00am Ryder Cup Official Film – 2006 7.30 History Of The Ryder Cup 9.00 Rugby League 11.00 Live Tennis: Davis Cup 4.00pm X-Adventures 4.30 Gillette World Sport 5.00 Barclays Premier League World 5.30 Big League Weekend 6.30 Off The Bar 7.00 Barclays Premier League Preview 7.30 LIVE Super League 10.00 Big League Weekend 11.00 Off The Bar 11.30 Barclays Premier League Preview 12.00am Tennis: Davis Cup 2.00 NFL: Total Access 3.00 X-Adventures 3.30 Gillette World Sport 4.00 Tennis: Davis Cup
Sky Sports 3 6.00am Motor Sport 7.00 WWE Raw 9.00 Football: UEFA Champions League (x16) 5.00 WWE Raw 7.00 Tight Lines 8.00 Off The Bar 8.30 Big League Weekend 9.30 Barclays Premier League Preview 10.00 WWE Late Night Smackdown 12.00am WWE Late Night Bottom Line 1.00 Sportnation 2008 2.00 Tight Lines 3.00 Rugby Union: Currie Cup 5.00 Sportnation 2008
Victoria Nangle
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Living
12.00pm Stargate Atlantis 1.00 Project Catwalk 2.00 Bones 3.00 Cold Case 4.00 Stargate Atlantis 5.00 Malcolm In The Middle (x3) 6.30 Futurama 7.00 The Simpsons (x2) 8.00 Noel’s HQ 9.30 Hairspray: The School Musical 10.30 Don’t Forget The Lyrics 11.30 UK Border Force 12.30am Road Wars (x2)
8.00pm Spendaholics 9.00 Dawn Gets Her Man 10.00 EastEnders 10.30 Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps (x2) 11.30 Family Guy (x2) 12.15am Massive (x2) 1.15 The Wrong Door 1.45 How Not To Live Your Life 2.15 Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps (x2) 3.15 Massive (x2) 4.15 The Real Hustle
7.00pm World News Today 7.30 The Harp 8.30 Cambridge Folk Festival 2008: Martha Wainwright Featuring Devon Sproule 9.00 The Roxy Music Story 9.55 Roxy Music: Frejus 10.45 Life On Mars 11.45 The Avengers 12.35am The Roxy Music Story 1.25 Bryan Ferry And Roxy Music 2.00 The Harp
4.30 Sally Jessy Raphael 5.20 The Montel Williams Show 6.05 Judge Judy (x2) 7.00 The X Factor. See highlights. 8.00. Xtra Factor 9.00 FILM: Terminator 2: Judgment Day (1991) 11.45 Katy Brand’s Big Ass Show 12.15am Katie & Peter: The Next Chapter 1.15 Coronation Street
5.40pm Film File 5.50 Heartbeat 6.55 The Wonder Years (x2) 8.00 Agatha Christie’s Poirot 9.00 Numb3rs 10.00 George Baker - Wexford And Me 10.05 Ruth Rendell’s Inspector Wexford: A Sleeping Life 12.10am Ruth Rendell’s Inspector Wexford: The Veiled One
12.45pm Scrubs (x2) 1.40 One Tree Hill 2.35 The OC 3.30 Gilmore Girls 4.25 Hollyoaks 5.00 Friends (x2) 6.00 Scrubs (x2) 7.00 Hollyoaks 7.30 My Name Is Earl 8.00 Friends (x2) 9.00 Wife Swap 10.00 Wife Swap: The Aftermath 10.35 FILM: Shaft (2000) 12.35am Scrubs (x2) 1.40 Gilmore Girls
2.00pm ER 3.00 Hill Street Blues 4.00 A Place In The Sun 4.30 Grand Designs 6.05 Deal Or No Deal 7.00 Property Ladder Revisited 8.00 More4 News 8.30 The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 9.00 FILM: Heartbreak Ridge (1986) 11.35 Death Of A Porn Star 12.35am All You Need Is Love 1.45 Property Ladder
11.55am Maury (x2) 1.45pm The Fix 2.00 Criminal Minds 3.00 Blood Ties 4.00 Charmed (x2) 6.00 Canada’s Next Top Model 7.00 Will And Grace (x2) 7.55 The Fix 8.00 Nothing To Declare (x2) 9.00 Criminal Minds 10.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation (x2) 12.00am Criminal Minds 1.00 Will And Grace
UK TV Gold
Paramount
Discovery
Sci Fi
Sky Movies
Sky Movies
Film4
TCM
5.00pm As Time Goes By 5.40 My Family 6.20 Keeping Up Appearances 7.00 Last Of The Summer Wine 7.40 Dinnerladies 8.20 Some Mothers Do ‘Ave ‘Em 9.00 Open All Hours 9.40 Porridge 10.20 The Royle Family 11.00 Men Behaving Badly 11.40 I’m Alan Partridge 12.20am Open All Hours
5.00pm Everybody Loves Raymond (x2) 6.00 Frasier (x2) 7.00 Everybody Hates Chris (x2) 8.00 Two And A Half Men (x2) 9.00 Scrubs 9.30 The Sarah Silverman Programme 10.00 Sex And The City 10.35 Sex And The City 11.10 The King Of Queens 11.40 Kitchen Confidential 12.10am Kitchen Confidential
2.30pm New Series Preview: Autumn Line-Up 3.00 Deadliest Catch 4.00 Time Team 5.00 Mythbusters 6.00 American Chopper 7.00 How Do They Do It? 7.30 How Stuff’s Made 8.00 My Shocking Story 9.00 Deranged Killers 10.00 A Haunting 11.00 Couples Who Kill 12.00am Unsolved Murders
11.00am Thunderbirds 12.05pm The Lost World 1.00 Firefly (x2) 3.00 FILM: The Sword Of Xanten (2004) 5.00 Thunderbirds 6.05 Firefly (x2) 8.00 Medium 9.00 Heroes 10.00 FILM: Highlander (1986) 12.10am FILM: Spirit Trap (2005) 2.00 Angel 3.00 Tin Man 4.00 Firefly (x2)
1.10pm The Devil And Miss Jones (1941) 2.55 A Touch Of Larceny (1959) 4.40 A Place In The Sun (1951) 6.45 The Top 10 Show 7.00 The Nutty Professor (1963) 9.00 The Enemy Below (1957) 10.45 The Killers (1964) 12.25am Underworld USA (1961) 2.05 The Big Clock (1948)
11.00am Brotherhood (2004) 1.30pm Adrift (2006) 3.15 Tell No One (2006) 5.30 Modern Greats Close Up 6.00 The Proposition (1998) 8.00 Shooting Fish (1997) 10.00 Hard Eight (1997) 11.45 Ong-Bak (2004) 1.45am Adrift (2006) 3.30 Hollywood Bombs & Blockbusters
1.00pm Sailor Beware! (1956) 2.40 Belles On Their Toes (1952) 4.30 Bugsy Malone (1976) Back when Scott Baio was cute and wasn’t trying to televise his womanising. And Jodie Foster was always cool. 6.25 The Battle Of Britain (1969) 9.00 Forrest Gump (1994) 11.40 Twisted (2004) 1.35am The King (2005)
9.00am An American In Paris (1951) 11.00 Goodbye Mr Chips (1939) 1.00pm Les Girls (1957) 3.00 The Champ (1979) 5.15 The Last Voyage (1960) 6.55 Moonfleet (1955) 8.30 The Screening Room 9.00 Poltergeist (1982) 11.05 Brewster McCloud (1970) 1.00am Eye Of The Devil (1967)
Classics
Indie
047_LS390_TV_sat
9/12/08
10:16 AM
Page 1
saturday 20 Strictly Come Dancing BBC1 6.10pm New series of the slebs’ thighslapping and tapping show. Phil Daniels, Jodie Kidd, John Sergeant, Cherie Lunghi, Heather Small, Gary Rhodes and Jessie Wallace face the judges and the voting public for the first time. It’s worth tuning in during the first rounds to see some right-royal left-footed behaviour.
Clarissa And The King’s Cookbook BBC2 7pm Clarissa Dickson Wright tracks down Britain’s oldest known cookbook The Forme of Cury, a 700-year-old scroll written during the reign of King Richard II from recipes created by the king’s master chefs – and wonders if this ancient manuscript may have influenced the way we eat now.
The Most Annoying Pop Songs… We Hate To Love BBC3, 9.30pm Countdown of 100 classic pop hits. It’s a mixture of those catchy songs you relish in private but wouldn’t dare to be caught dancing to in public, or tunes that are so catchy you can’t get them out of your head. Includes: Bryan Adams, Billy Joel, TaTu, Whitney Houston and Wings.
terrestrial
sport
BBC1
BBC2
ITV1
Channel 4
Five
Sky Sports 1
6.00am Breakfast 9.30 Saturday Kitchen 11.00 Golf: Ryder Cup Highlights 12.00pm BBC News 12.10 Football Focus 1.00 Tennis: Davis Cup 4.30 Final Score 5.20 BBC News 5.30 Regional News And Weather 5.40 Hole In The Wall
6.00am Tikkabilla 6.30 Teletubbies 6.55 Tweenies Songtime 7.00 Roar 8.00 Secret Show 8.15 Secret Show 8.30 Gimme A Break 9.00 Hider In The House 10.00 Hot Rods 10.25 Prank Patrol Pocketsize 10.30 The Slammer 10.55 The Owl 11.00 The Story Of Tracy Beaker 11.30 Eliot Kid 11.45 Sportsround 12.00pm Sound 12.30 Scene Stealers 1.00 Greek 1.45 Revealed 2.00 FILM: The Blue Max (1966) 4.30 Masterchef The Professionals 5.30 Dad’s Army
6.00am GMTV 9.25 Captain Mack 9.40 Horrid Henry 9.55 Emu 10.10 My Parents Are Aliens 10.40 Drake And Josh 11.10 Bernard’s Watch 11.25 Planet Sketch 11.35 Coronation Street Omnibus 1.45pm ITV News And Weather 1.50 Meridian News And Weather 2.00 FILM: The Three Musketeers (1973) 4.00 Inspector Morse
6.00am The Treacle People 6.10 The Hoobs 6.35 The Hoobs 7.00 Goalissimo! 8.00 The Morning Line 8.55 T-Mobile Transmission 9.25 Friends 9.55 Vodafone Live Music Awards 2008 11.00 4Music Presents... Kings Of Leon 11.30 The Hills 12.00pm Reaper 1.00 Scrubs 1.30 Scrubs 2.00 Channel 4 Racing 4.05 Supernanny US 5.00 A Million Pound Place In The Sun
6.00am FIFA Futbol Mundial 6.30 Big League Weekend 7.30 Off The Bar 8.00 UEFA Champions League Weekly 8.30 Barclays Premier League Preview 9.00 Soccer AM 12.00pm LIVE Golf: Ryder Cup 6.00 LIVE Golf: Ryder Cup 12.00am Super League 2.00 Spanish Football 3.00 UEFA Champions League Weekly 4.00 Rugby Union: ‘Help For Heroes’ Charity Match 5.30 UEFA Champions League Weekly
6.00 Inside The Medieval Mind Leading authority on the Middle Ages, Professor Robert Bartlett, presents a series which examines the way we thought during Medieval times. 7.00 Clarissa And The King’s Cookbook See highlights. 7.30 Stephen Fry And The Gutenberg Press Stephen Fry examines the story behind the first media entrepreneur. 8.30 Christina: A Medieval Life Historian Michael Wood presents a portrait of ordinary people, tracing the story of a real-life peasant of the 14th century. 9.30 Have I Got News For You Comedy quiz show with guest host Omid Djalili, team captains Paul Merton and Ian Hislop and panellists Julian Fellowes and Danny Baker. 10.00 Mock The Week Dara O’Briain is joined by regulars Frankie Boyle, Hugh Dennis, Russell Howard and Andy Parsons and guests Adam Bloom and Gina Yashere. 10.30 Arena: The Hunt For MobyDick Acclaimed writer Philip Hoare confronts our fascination with one of the most mysterious animals in the ocean, the whale. 11.30 Golf: Ryder Cup Highlights Gary Lineker presents coverage of the second day of The Ryder Cup. 1.00am FILM: Countess Dracula
6.00 Meridian News And Weather Local news and weather. 6.15 ITV News And Weather News headlines, national weather forecast. 6.30 You’ve Been Framed! Funniest 100 Harry Hill present the funniest 100 home videos. 7.30 The X Factor The final auditions roll around and some of the best contenders from the 182,000 hopefuls who applied, show off their talent in front of judges 8.30 All Star Family Fortunes Vernon Kay presents a new series of the game show. 9.15 It’ll Be Alright On The Night The original bloopers show returns, hosted by Griff Rhys Jones. 10.15 FILM: The Guru (2001) Starring Jimi Mistry. Comedy about a young Indian dance instructor who heads for New York and accidently ends up starring in a porn movie. On set, an actress gives him some advice on porn acting, but when he shares this philosophy at a party, he unexpectedly finds himself being promoted as a sex guru. 11.15 ITV News and Weather News headlines, weather forecast. 11.30 FILM: The Guru (2001) 12.20am Bingo Night Live Free bingo. 1.25 Nightwatch With Steve Scott: 2.20 FILM: After Hours 3.55 ITV Nightscreen 5.30 ITV Early Morning News
6.00 Channel 4 News Including sport and weather. 6.30 The Secret Millionaire Series in which a millionaire goes undercover in a deprived area in the hope of changing someone’s life. 7.30 FILM: The Lord Of The Rings: The Two Towers See film highlights. 10.55 8 Out Of 10 Cats Jimmy Carr presents the topical comedy panel show with team captains Sean Lock and Jason Manford. 11.25 Vodafone Live Music Awards 2008 The 2008 Vodafone Live Music Awards, presented by Steve Jones and Juliette Lewis from Brixton Academy in London. The awards celebrate the lifeblood of the music industry – live music. Featuring performances from Estelle and The Ting Tings. 12.05am 4 Music: Orange Rockcorps Young people volunteer in their community in exchange for a ticket to one of the year’s hottest gigs at the Royal Albert Hall. 1.20 FILM: In The Mix (2005) 2.55 3 Minute Wonder: Street Art 3.00 Short documentary about graffiti artist Blek Le Rat. 3.05 Short film about the underground street art scene in Madrid. 3.10 The impact of auctioning street art. 3.15 FILM: Rebound (2005) 4.40 St Elsewhere 5.25 Countdown
6.00am Sunrise 7.00 Harry And His Bucket Full Of Dinosaurs 7.15 The Save-Ums! 7.35 Franny’s Feet 7.50 The Adventures Of Bottle Top Bill And His Best Friend Corky 8.10 Little Princess 8.20 Miss Spider’s Sunny Patch Friends 8.40 The Beeps 8.55 Fireman Sam 9.10 Rupert Bear 9.20 Animal Families 9.35 The Secret Of Eel Island 9.50 Look! 10.00 Fifth Gear 11.00 Axe Men 12.00pm Axe Men 1.00 Extreme Fishing With Robson Green 2.00 Animal Rescue Squad 2.20 FILM: A Guy Thing (2002) 4.10 FILM: The Naked Spur (1953) 6.00 FILM: The Shootist (1976) See film highlights. 7.45 Five News And Sport National and international headlines. 8.00 NCIS Drama series following a team of special agents who investigate crimes connected to Navy and Marine Corps personnel. The team is called to a small town where a marine intelligence officer has been shot dead. The local police have already investigated the crime and suspect that an Iraqi resident is responsible. 8.55 NCIS The team learns that ten kilos of highly toxic chemical weapons have fallen into the hands of a dangerous terrorist and race against time to stop him using them. 9.55 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation Wendy and her fellow ‘lab rats’ join Hodges as he presents them with a series of hypothetical murders in order to give them a chance to play CSI. Meanwhile, Catherine and the rest of the team attempt to reach out to Grissom in the wake of Sara’s departure. 10.55 Law And Order: Criminal Intent Crime drama series that looks inside the minds of criminals as well as following the Major Case Squad’s investigations. 11.55 Quiz Call Interactive quiz show 4.25am Game Ranger Diaries 5.10 House Doctor x2
6.10 Strictly Come Dancing See highlights. 7.30 Merlin New fantasy-drama series based on Arthurian legend. Merlin, a wizard on the cusp of adulthood, is told by the Great Dragon that his destiny is to use his skills to keep the young Prince Arthur safe. 8.15 The National Lottery: Who Dares Wins Nick Knowles hosts the Saturday night National Lottery quiz. 9.00 Casualty Abs is quick to blame himself when Stacey is accused of injuring a young girl. Dixie and Jeff struggle with their feelings in the wake of the accident. In the midst of chaos, a familiar face arrives to take control. Charlie!? 9.50 BBC News National and international news, weather. 10.10 Match Of The Day Highlights of the day’s five matches in the Barclays Premier League. Arsenal face Bolton. Elsewhere, Sunderland host Middlesbrough, West Ham take on Newcastle and Fulham visit Blackburn. 11.10 FILM: Annapolis (2006) Starring James Franco. A young man from a poor, working-class family dreams of attending the prestigious United States Naval Academy. 12.45am Friday Night With Jonathan Ross Celebrity chat show. 1.50 Joins BBC News
Sky Sports 2 6.00am Tight Lines 7.00 Golf: Ryder Cup 11.30 Racing News 12.00pm Gillette Soccer Saturday 6.00 LIVE Super League 7.55 UEFA Champions League Weekly 8.25 Football First: Game Of The Day 10.15 Football First: Match Choice (x4) 4.15 Spanish Football 5.45 Sky Sports Classics
Sky Sports 3 6.00am Aerobics: Oz Style 6.30 LIVE Rugby Union 8.30 LIVE Rugby Union 10.30 Gillette World Sport 11.00 WWE Smackdown 1.00pm Gillette World Sport 1.30 LIVE Rugby Union: Help For Heroes Charity Match 4.30 Gillette World Sport 5.00 WWE Smackdown 7.00 WWE The Bottom Line 8.00 Rugby Union: ‘Help For Heroes’ Charity Match 9.30 Gillette World Sport 10.00 Extreme Championship Wrestling 11.00 WWE Smackdown 1.00am WWE Late Night Bottom Line 2.00 Tennis: Davis Cup 4.00 Super League
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extraterrestrial Sky One
BBC3
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Living
3.00pm Malcolm In The Middle (x2) 4.00 Hairspray: The School Musical 5.00 Malcolm In The Middle 5.30 Futurama 6.00 American Gladiators 7.00 The Simpsons 7.30 UK Border Force 8.30 The Simpsons 9.00 Ross Kemp On Gangs 10.00 Road Wars (x2) 12.00am Prison Break 1.00 Street Wars
7.00pm Snog Marry Avoid? 7.30 The Real Hustle (x2) 8.30 When Beauty Goes Wrong 9.30 The Most Annoying Pop Songs...We Hate To Love 12.00am Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps (x2) 1.00 Massive (x2) 2.00 Snog Marry Avoid? 2.30 When Beauty Goes Wrong 3.25 The Wrong Door
7.00pm Alistair Cooke: Postcards From America 8.00 The Unseen Alistair Cooke 9.00 The Day After Peace: Storyville 10.20 FILM: The Name Of The Rose (1986) 12.25am The Roxy Music Story 1.15 The Day After Peace: Storyville 2.35 The Unseen Alistair Cooke 3.35 Alistair Cooke: Postcards From America
2.50pm ITV At The Movies 3.20 All Star Family Fortunes 4.05 Xtra Factor 5.05 The Fashion Show 6.05 Planet’s Funniest Animals 6.30 CelebAir 7.30 Homes From Hell 2008 8.30 Xtra Factor 9.30 Katy Brand’s Big Ass Show 10.00 FILM: Dead Calm (1989) 12.00am The X Factor 1.00 Xtra Factor
12.25pm Agatha Christie’s Poirot 1.30 Inspector Wexford: Put On By Cunning 3.40 Cadfael 5.20 FILM: Holiday On The Buses (1974) 7.00 Inspector Morse 9.00 Taggart 10.35 FILM: Shadowlands (1993) 1.10am The Casebook Of Sherlock Holmes 2.10 PD James 3.00 Cagney And Lacey 3.50 Film File
12.45pm Gilmore Girls (x2) 2.30 Hollyoaks Omnibus 5.00 Friends (x2) 6.00 Wife Swap 7.00 Supernanny US 8.00 Friends (x2) 9.00 The 100 Greatest Kids’ TV Shows 10.40 FILM: The Fifth Element (1997) 1.05am Hollyoaks Omnibus 3.35 Switched (x4) 5.00 Anything Goes
2.15pm FILM: The Thief Of Bagdad (1940) 4.25 Property Ladder (x4) 8.40 Property Ladder Revisited 9.45 FILM: Master And Commander: The Far Side Of The World (2003) 12.25am The West Wing 1.25 Property Ladder (x2) 3.30 Close
2.30pm Will And Grace (x2) 3.30 FILM: The Karate Kid III (1989) 5.50 The Fix 6.00 America’s Next Top Model 7.00 Make Me A Supermodel US 8.00 Criminal Minds (x2) 10.00 Most Haunted 11.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 12.00am Ghost Whisperer 1.00 Kath And Kim (x2) 2.00 Home Video Heroes
UK TV Gold
Paramount
Discovery
Sci Fi
Sky Movies
Sky Movies
Film4
TCM
12.05pm Pride And Prejudice 1.10 As Time Goes By 2.30 My Hero 3.10 FILM: Doctor In Trouble (1970) 4.55 What A Carry On! 5.30 FILM: Doctor At Sea (1955) 7.20 What A Carry On! 7.50 The Vicar Of Dibley 9.00 FILM: Thirteen Days (2000) 11.40 The Vicar Of Dibley 12.50am What A Carry On!
4.00pm The King Of Queens (x2) 5.00 Everybody Hates Chris (x2) 6.00 The King Of Queens (x6) 9.00 Everybody Hates Chris (x2) 10.00 Sex And The City (x2) 11.10 Sex And The City (x2) 12.25am Sex And The City (x2) 1.35 Sex And The City (x2) 2.50 Linc’s 3.20 Sexy Cam 3.35 The King Of Queens (x2)
4.30pm Crime Scene USA: North Mission Road 5.00 Deadliest Catch 6.00 Killer Jellyfish 7.00 Building The Ultimate (x2) 8.00 Born Survivor: Bear Grylls 9.00 FILM: Greystoke: The Legend Of Tarzan, Lord Of The Apes (1984) 11.30 Born Survivor: Bear Grylls 12.30am Crime Scene USA: Body Of Evidence
6.00am FILM: Frozen Impact (2002) 8.00 Teleshopping 11.00 Star Trek 12.00pm Thunderbirds (x2) 2.10 Quantum Leap (x2) 4.10 Firefly 5.10 Firefly 6.10 FILM: Big (1988) 8.10 Tin Man 10.00 FILM: The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975) 12.00am FILM: Cocoon (1985) 2.20 FILM: Dracula II: Ascension (2003)
8.35am Patton (1970) 11.25 Pimpernel Smith (1941) 1.25pm The Miracle Of Morgan’s Creek (1944) 3.05 The Greatest Show On Earth (1952) 5.40 Charade (1963) 7.35 It Came From Outer Space (1953) 9.00 Patton (1970) 11.50 The Pawnbroker (1965) 1.50am Charade (1963)
9.00am Tube Tales (1999) 10.35 Babel (2006) 1.00pm New Police Story (2004) 3.05 Letters From Iwo Jima (2006) 5.25 Hollywoodland (2006) 7.35 Babel (2006) 10.00 Wild At Heart (1990) 12.10am I Want You (1998) 1.45 New Police Story (2004) 3.50 China’s Hollywood
1.00pm Napoleon Dynamite (2004) 2.45 The Battle Of Britain (1969) 5.20 Big Top Pee-wee (1988) 7.00 Ladies In Lavender (2004) 9.00 Alien (1979) 11.20 Alien Resurrection (1997) 1.25am Election (2005) 3.25 Close
9.00am The Champ (1979) 11.15 The Shop Around The Corner (1940) 1.00pm Sunday In New York (1963) 3.00 Doctor Zhivago (1965) 6.25 Kelly’s Heroes (1970) 9.00 The Bounty (1984) 11.30 The Screening Room 12.00am Sweet Bird Of Youth (1962) 2.05 Arturo’s Island (1962) 3.40 Kind Lady (1951)
Classics
Indie
048_LS390_TV_sun
9/12/08
2:21 PM
Page 1
sunday 21 Charley Boorman: Ireland to Sydney by Any Means BBC2, 8pm On reaching India the team head for Delhi. Disaster strikes as one of the team gets seriously injured and has to drop out with an emotional goodbye to return to London for medical attention. One man down, the team travel on through India. Got to admire their staying power.
Massive BBC3 9pm Sitcom about two friends who pack in their jobs and set up their own record label. They can’t believe their luck when the ‘HearKittyKitty’ single is played on Radio 1. The girls demand a music video. But while the lads argue about a concept, A&R scout Ricky Lisberg starts sniffing round. Class comedy.
The Streets: The South Bank Show
ITV1, 11.15pm A film following Mike Skinner, the man behind The Streets, as he records his fourth album in Prague. Skinner’s one man band has successfully portrayed urban life for today’s youth in the UK. Even if he did nearly ruin his street cred with ‘Dry your Eyes’.
terrestrial
sport
BBC1
BBC2
ITV1
Channel 4
Five
Sky Sports 1
6.00am Breakfast 7.55 Match of the Day 9.00 The Andrew Marr Show 10.00 Sunday Life 11.00 Countryfile 12.00pm The Politics Show 1.00 Diagnosis Murder 1.45 EastEnders 3.45 Merlin 4.30 Final Score 5.00 Lifeline 5.10 BBC News 5.20 BBC News 5.30 Tess of the D’Urbervilles 6.30 After You’ve Gone Sitcom about a jack-of-all-trades. When Kev gets engaged, Jimmy starts panicking that Siobhan will want a similar commitment from him.
6.00am Tikkabilla 6.30 Teletubbies 6.55 Tweenies Songtime 7.00 Roar 8.00 Mona the Vampire 8.13 The Owl 8.15 What’s New Scooby Doo? 8.35 Stupid 9.00 SMart 10.00 Something for the Weekend 11.30 Film 2008 with Jonathan Ross 12.00pm Tennis: Davis Cup 3.00 Golf: Ryder Cup 4.30 Rugby League World 5.25 Songs of Praise
6.00am GMTV 9.25 Horrid Henry 9.40 Art Attack 10.05 Finger Tips 10.25 Finger Tips 10.45 Tricky Quickies 10.50 The Championship 11.50 ITV News and Weather 11.55 Meridian News and Weather 12.00pm The X Factor 1.00 FILM: Free Willy (1993) 3.05 FILM: Police Academy 4: Citizens On Patrol (1987) 4.45 All Star Family Fortunes 5.30 Meridian News and Weather 5.45 ITV News and Weather
6.10am The Hoobs 6.35 Trans World Sport 7.30 UK School Games 8.20 British Triathlon Grand Prix 8.50 Friends 9.20 Orange Rockcorps 9.35 Hollyoaks Omnibus 12.05pm Friends 12.35 4Music Presents... James Morrison 1.05 Friends 1.35 Ugly Betty 2.25 When Women Rule the World 3.30 The Simpsons 4.00 The Simpsons 4.30 Deal or No Deal 5.15 Deadliest Catch
6.00am Football First: Match Choice (x2) 9.00 Sunday Supplement 10.00 Goals on Sunday 11.30 LIVE Ford Super Sunday (x2) 4.30 LIVE Golf: Ryder Cup 8.00 LIVE Golf: Ryder Cup 12.00am Spanish Football 2.00 Football First: Match Choice (x2) 5.00 UEFA Champions League Weekly 5.30 Gillette World Sport
7.00 Antiques Roadshow 8.00 Strictly Come Dancing Bruce Forsyth and Tess Daly host the celebrity ballroom dancing competition. 9.00 Tess of the D’Urbervilles Second in the four-part drama series based on the novel by Thomas Hardy. Tess returns home in confusion and shame after being seduced by her manipulative ‘cousin’ Alec D’Urberville. Her baby, whom she christens Sorrow, is a sickly child, but Tess finds work on a dairy farm where she meets the handsome Angel Clare again. Can he offer her the love and deliverance she craves? 10.00 BBC News News, Weather. 10.20 FILM: Captain Corelli’s Mandolin (2001) Starring Nicolas Cage, Penelope Cruz, John Hurt, Christian Bale and Irene Papas. Wartime drama about the romance that develops between a gregarious Italian captain and a strong-willed Greek woman during the Italian occupation of Cephalonia. 12.20am Weatherview Detailed weather forecast. 12.25 Sign Zone: Amazon with Bruce Parry. 1.25 Holby City. 2.25 The Dark Side of Fame. 3.10 The Planners Are Coming. 3.40 Joins BBC News.
6.00 Dragons’ Den Ideas up for consideration include a while-u-wait gold plating service, a Cornish music festival, dried fruit and meat snacks and a celebrity look-a-like business for hen parties. 7.00 Top Gear Motoring magazine with Jeremy Clarkson, James May and Richard Hammond. 8.00 Charley Boorman: Ireland to Sydney by Any Means See highlights 9.00 Earth: The Climate Wars Having explained the science behind global warming, and addressed the arguments of the climate change sceptics earlier in the series, in this third and final part Dr Iain Stewart looks at the biggest challenge now facing climate scientists. Just how can they predict exactly what changes global warming will bring? 10.00 Match of the Day 2 Highlights of the five Barclays Premier League matches including Chelsea’s clash with Manchester United. Chelsea pushed Manchester United all the way last season but finished second in both the Premier League and Champions League. 11.10 Golf: Ryder Cup Gary Lineker presents highlights.. 12.40am FILM: Ooh... You Are Awful! 2.15 Joins BBC News 3.40 The Super League Show
6.00 Country Lives Chris Beardshaw meets a river keeper in Hampshire for his first fly-fishing lesson. 6.30 You’ve Been Framed! The show where people pretend to have accidents on camera for money. Only funny if you are severely hungover and can’t move from the sofa. 7.00 For One Night Only Today, hosts Michael Buble and Denise Van Outen introduce Rihanna, who performs her current hit single, ‘Disturbia’. Plus, comedy from Mark Watson and Stephen K Amos, and Michael himself performs his worldwide hit, ‘Everything’. 8.00 Heartbeat A pensioner who Carol has been visiting, dies unexpectedly. 9.00 Agatha Christie’s Poirot After revolution overthrows Prince Ali Yusuf, his friend hides priceless jewels in the tennis racquet belonging to English schoolgirl Jennifer Sutcliffe. Makes perfect sense to me. 11.00 ITV News and Weather News and weather. 11.15 The Streets: The South Bank Show See highlights. 12.10am It’s My Life Debate about young people and politics. 1.05 Faith in the Frame 1.30 60 Minute Makeover 2.20 Moving Dayx2 3.10 ITV Nightscreen 5.30 ITV Early Morning News
6.15 Channel 4 News Including sport and weather. 6.30 Mona Lisa Curse Renowned art critic Robert Hughes examines how the world’s most famous painting came to be so influential amid the birth of contemporary art. He looks at changes to the production and exhibition of art over the last 50 years, from the counter-cultural scene in the 1960s to the investor-led art market of the 80s. He examines the power of museums forced to compete for major art works with billionaire private collectors. 8.00 Wife Swap A traditional country mum from Gloucestershire trades lives with a fashionista mother living in Brighton who doesn’t believe in rules or discipline. 9.00 FILM: The Notebook (2004) See film highlights. 11.25 Back to You Sitcom starring sitcom veterans Kelsey Grammer and Patricia Heaton. 11.55 Animate TV Seven new experimental animations. 1.00am FILM: Maine Gandhi Ko Nahin Mara Bollywood drama 3.00 Swimming Short film. 3.15 Dispatches: What’s in Your Wine? 4.10 3 Minute Wonder: Britain Recut 4.15 St Elsewhere 5.10 Countdown 5.55 Inuk Children’s animated series
7.40 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 7.50 Little Princess 8.05 Miss Spider’s Sunny Patch Friends 8.25 The Beeps 8.40 Fireman Sam 8.55 Rupert Bear 9.10 Animal Families 9.25 George Shrinks 10.00 Top Trumps: Extreme Planes 10.30 Highland Emergency 11.00 Mary Magdalene – Saint or Sinner? 12.00pm The Family Recipe 12.10 FILM: Murder Among Friends (2001) 1.55 FILM: Simon Sez (1999) 3.30 FILM: Rough Air: Danger On Flight 534 (2001) 5.20 Five News 5.35 FILM: Bicentennial Man (1999) 8.00 Austin Stevens’ Adventures Wildlife documentary. 9.00 FILM: Black Hawk Down (2001) Starring Josh Hartnett, Ewan McGregor, Tom Sizemore, Jason Isaacs and Eric Bana. Gritty war drama based on the true story of a botched US Army mission in Somalia during the early 1990s. US Army Rangers parachute into Mogadishu in an attempt to capture a warlord’s two top lieutenants, but the operation goes disastrously wrong when a pair of helicopters are shot down. 11.45 America’s Toughest Prisons Documentary series unlocking the truth about some of America’s most notorious prisons. In Utah State Prison, many criminals have to make the tough choice between supporting their families and running with a gang. Female gang member Natalie Terrazas faces an even tougher choice – her entire family belongs to a violent street gang, meaning that she will have to turn her back on them if she is to avoid a life behind bars. 12.50am Major League Baseball Jonny Gould and Josh Chetwynd present the top game from the States, plus a comprehensive roundup of highlights and results. 4.20 IndyCar 5.10 House Doctorx2
Sky Sports 2 6.00am Gillette World Sport 6.30 UEFA Champions League Weekly 7.00 Spanish Football 8.30 Golf: Ryder Cup 12.30pm LIVE Pro40 League 6.00 Sky Sports Classics 6.30 Gillette World Sport 7.00 LIVE Spanish Football 10.00 Football First: Match Choice (x2) 1.00am Gillette World Sport 1.30 Seamaster Sailing 2.00 Close
Sky Sports 3 6.00am X-Adventures 6.30 Wild Spirits 7.00 Tennis: Davis Cup 9.00 Super League 11.00 LIVE Tennis: Davis Cup 3.00pm Gillette World Sport 3.30 Watersports World 4.30 NFL: Total Access 5.30 NFL: Who Is? 6.00 LIVE NFL 9.00 LIVE NFL 12.30am NFL: Top Ten 1.30 LIVE NFL 4.30 Sportnation 5.30 Close
Alison Swann
extraterrestrial Sky One
BBC3
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ITV2
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2.00pm Bones 3.00 Don’t Forget the Lyrics 4.00 Futurama (x2) 5.00 The Simpsons (x2) 6.00 Hairspray: The School Musical 7.00 Celebrity Are You Smarter than a TenYear-Old? 8.00 FILM: Wild Wild West (1999) 10.05 Ross Kemp on Gangs 11.05 Bones 12.05am Road Wars 1.05 Street Wars
7.00pm The Real Hustle (x2) 8.00 The World’s Strictest Parents 9.00 Massive 9.30 Gavin and Stacey 10.00 Family Guy (x2) 10.45 Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps (x2) 11.45 Massive 12.15am Gavin and Stacey 12.45 How Not to Live Your Life 1.15 The Wrong Door
7.30pm The Whale in the Museum 7.50 Philip Hoare’s Guide to Whales 8.00 Natural World 8.50 Philip Hoare’s Guide to Whales 9.00 Wildlife Special 9.50 Philip Hoare’s Guide to Whales 10.00 Incredible Animal Journeys 11.00 President Hollywood 12.00am How to Be a Good President
12.30pm Emmerdale 3.25 Coronation Street 6.00 The X Factor 7.00 The Fashion Show 8.00 Xtra Factor 9.00 Katie & Peter: The Next Chapter 10.00 Secret Diary of a Call Girl 10.30 No Heroics 11.00 CelebAir 12.00am Entourage 12.30 Xtra Factor 1.30 Teleshopping 5.00 ITV2 Nightscreen
6.55pm Dempsey and Makepeace 8.00 Celebrating... The South Bank Show 8.30 Celebrating... The South Bank Show 9.00 FILM: Shadowlands (1993) 11.30 Profiling Ruth Rendell 12.30am Hammer House of Horror 1.40 FILM: Nora Roberts Collection: Carolina Moon (2007)
12.25pm Roswell (x2) 2.15 Smallville: Superman The Early Years (x2) 4.00 Friends (x2) 5.05 Ghost Whisperer 6.00 Crowned 7.00 Friends (x2) 8.00 Ugly Betty 9.00 Desperate Housewives 10.00 Desperate Housewives 11.00 Samantha Who? 11.25 Shameless 12.30am Roy Chubby Brown
1.10pm A Place in the Sun 1.45 The Coach Trip (x5) 4.30 Come Dine with Me (x5) 7.25 Jamie at Home 7.55 River Cottage Road Trip 9.00 Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares 10.00 Gordon Ramsay’s F Word 11.05 Father Ted (x2) 12.10am Trigger Happy TV 12.40 Deal or No Deal 1.25 Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares
3.20pm Will and Grace 3.50 The Fix 4.00 America’s Next Top Model 5.00 Exposed: Madonna 6.00 Home Video Heroes (x2) 7.00 Dirty Dancing: The Time of Your Life 8.00 Ghost Whisperer 9.00 The Underdog Show 11.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 12.00am Ghost Whisperer 1.00 Kath and Kim
UK TV Gold
Paramount
Discovery
Sci Fi
Sky Movies
Sky Movies
Film4
TCM
3.05pm FILM: Doctor In The House (1954) 4.50 What a Carry On! 5.25 FILM: Doctor In Love (1960) 7.15 What a Carry On! 7.50 The Vicar of Dibley 9.00 Jonathan Creek 10.20 Little Britain 10.55 What a Carry On! 11.30 The Vicar of Dibley 12.45am What a Carry On! 1.20 Close Up 1.30 Columbo
9.00am The King of Queens (x15) 4.30 The King of Queens (x9) 9.00 Scrubs 9.30 The Sarah Silverman Programme 10.00 Sex and the City (x8) 2.50 Sexy Cam 3.00 The King of Queens (x4) 5.00 Sir Leslie Quint: A Life in Film (x2) 5.10 The King of Queens (x2)
2.00pm FILM: Greystoke: The Legend Of Tarzan, Lord Of The Apes (1984) 4.30 New Series Preview: Autumn Line-Up 5.00 Chasing Churchill 6.00 Deadliest Catch 7.00 Killer Jellyfish 8.00 My Shocking Story 9.00 Deranged Killers 10.00 A Haunting 11.00 Couples Who Kill 12.00am Unsolved Murders
12.05pm FILM: Termination Point (2007) 1.55 FILM: The Phantom (1996) 4.00 The Making Of Tin Man 4.35 FILM: Cocoon (1985) 6.55 Thunderbirds 8.00 FILM: Poseidon Adventure (2005) 9.40 Heroes 10.40 FILM: Spirit Trap (2005) 12.30am FILM: Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein (1994) 3.00 Tin Man
12.50pm Rooster Cogburn (1975) 2.40 The Top 10 Show 3.00 Gunfight At The OK Corral (1957) 5.05 Dead Heat On A Merry-Go-Round (1966) 6.55 Operation Petticoat (1959) 9.00 Coogan’s Bluff (1968) 10.40 Barefoot In The Park (1967) 12.35am Support Your Local Sheriff! (1969)
11.50am The Duellists (1977) 1.40pm The Escapist (2001) 3.15 The Page Turner (2006) 4.45 The Curse Of The Golden Flower (2006) 6.45 Friends With Money (2006) 8.15 The Duellists (1977) 10.00 Nil By Mouth (1997) 12.10am The Big Lebowski (1998)
1.00pm The Perfect Catch (2005) 3.05 Hoppity Goes To Town (1941) 4.40 The Quiet Man (1952) 7.10 The Honeymooners (2005) 9.00 Along Came A Spider (2001) 11.00 The New World (2005) 1.40am Prick Up Your Ears (1987)
10.30am The Screening Room 10.55 Romeo And Juliet (1936) 1.00pm Yolanda And The Thief (1945) 3.00 Whistle Down The Wind (1961) 4.50 Designing Woman (1957) 6.55 Rhapsody (1954) 9.00 North By Northwest (1959) 11.30 The Fixer (1968) 1.55am Wild Rovers (1971) 4.10 The Divine Garbo
Classics
Indie
049_LS390_TV_mon
9/12/08
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monday 22 What to Eat Now BBC2, 8.30pm Valentine Warner unearths the very best ingredients, as he travels the length of Britain on a journey through the very best autumn food. This week, Valentine takes on the Women’s Institute by entering his sloe gin and blackberry jelly in a competition to find the tastiest dessert. Brave boy.
Dispatches: Let Down by Labour Channel 4, 8pm A report on the families who were won over by Tony Blair, but are now disillusioned. The film features families who can’t afford their mortgages, working families who haven’t been able to lift their children out of poverty, and pensioners who will be unable to pay their winter heating bills.
Prime Suspect ITV3, 10pm Prime Suspect Helen Mirren stars as DSI Jane Tennison, plunged into the alien world of teenage girls when 14-year-old Sallie Sturdy goes missing. Tennison is forced to confront her own demons, as she struggles to investigate what could be her last high-profile case. First of two parts. Classic detective drama
terrestrial
sport
BBC1
BBC2
ITV1
Channel 4
Five
Sky Sports 1
6.00am Breakfast 9.15 Dom’s on the Case 10.00 Homes Under the Hammer 11.00 Open House 11.30 Cash in the Attic 12.15pm Bargain Hunt 1.00 BBC News 1.30 South East Today 1.45 Doctors 2.15 Diagnosis Murder 3.00 BBC News 3.05 Lazytown 3.30 Bear Behaving Badly 3.50 Eliot Kid 4.03 The Owl 4.05 Get 100 4.35 Bernard 4.40 Even Stevens 5.00 Newsround 5.15 The Weakest Link
7.25 Newsround 7.30 Batfink 7.35 Best of Friends 8.05 Mortified 8.30 Bob the Builder: Project Build It 8.45 Boogie Beebies 9.00 Mister Maker 9.20 Balamory 9.40 Little Red Tractor 9.55 Pingu 10.00 In the Night Garden 10.30 Big Barn Farm 10.45 Get Squiggling 11.00 Fun with Phonics 11.10 China Stories 11.30 The Daily Politics – Conference Special 1.00pm Out of the Blue 1.25 Coast 1.30 Working Lunch 2.00 Sun, Sea and Bargain Spotting 3.00 Murder, She Wrote 3.45 Flog It! 4.30 Step Up to the Plate 5.15 Wanted Down Under 6.00 Eggheads Dermot Murnaghan hosts a general knowledge quiz. 6.30 Strictly Come Dancing 7.00 Golf: Ryder Cup A final chance to re-live the dramatic conclusion of the 37th Ryder Cup from Kentucky. 7.30 Mastermind Four contestants are interrogated on a chosen subject. 8.00 University Challenge King’s College Cambridge fight it out with the University of Edinburgh. 8.30 What to Eat Now See highlights. 9.00 Amazon with Bruce Parry Bruce Parry embarks on an epic adventure in the Amazon, following the river from source to sea. 10.00 Harry and Paul Harry Enfield and Paul Whitehouse are back with a whole new range of characters. 10.30 Newsnight In-depth investigation and analysis of the stories behind the day’s headlines. 11.20 Today at Conference Andrew Neil looks back at the day’s events at the Labour conference in Manchester. 11.50 Three Men in Another Boat First of a two part follow-up to the 2006 remake of the Jerome K. Jerome classic. 12.50am Ellery Queen Author and amateur detective Ellery Queen attempts to solve another murder. 1.40 Joins BBC News 4.00 Belief File – Hinduism and Judaism
6.00am GMTV 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 10.30 This Morning 11.15 ITV News and Weather 11.20 Meridian News and Weather 11.25 This Morning 12.30pm Loose Women 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News and Weather 2.00 60 Minute Makeover 3.00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 4.00 A Touch of Frost 5.00 Britain’s Best Dish
6.10am The Hoobs (x2) 7.00 Freshly Squeezed 7.30 Everybody Loves Raymond 8.00 Just Shoot Me 8.30 Will and Grace 9.00 Frasier 9.30 Britain AD: King Arthur’s Britain 10.30 Osama Bin Everywhere: The Many Faces of the Islamic World 11.20 Year Dot 11.50 Designers Under Pressure 12.00pm News at Noon 12.30 Property Ladder 1.35 Grudge Match 1.45 FILM: Boomerang (1947) 3.25 Countdown 4.15 Deal or No Deal 5.00 The Paul O’Grady Show
6.00am Good Morning Sports Fans (x4) 9.00 Football First: Match Choice 10.30 UEFA Champions League Weekly 11.00 Spanish Football 1.00pm Football First: Match Choice 2.30 UEFA Champions League Weekly 3.00 Spanish Football 5.00 Soccer AM: The Best Bits 6.00 Big League Weekend 7.30 LIVE Speedway 9.30 You’re on Sky Sports! 11.00 Big League Weekend 12.30am Soccer AM: the Best Bits 1.30 NFL 5.00 UEFA Champions League Weekly 5.30 Wild Spirits
6.00 Meridian Tonight Local news and weather. 6.30 ITV Evening News and Weather 7.00 Emmerdale Nicola and Katie come to blows. Jamie’s suspicious when Louise avoids him. Eli thinks he’s blown his proposal to Debbie. 7.30 Coronation Street Will Harry take Liz or Clarissa to the ball? Kevin contemplates the garage’s future. Fiz defends John against Sally. 8.00 The Tax Factor: Tonight Jonathan Maitland looks at which of today’s so called stealth taxes are the most hated. 8.30 Coronation Street Vernon asks Liz to choose between him and Harry. Duh. Carla blows Tony out for Liam. 9.00 Place of Execution A journalist making a documentary about a schoolgirl who vanished from a remote village. 10.00 News at Ten and Weather 10.35 Real Crime: Serial Killer on Camera The story of Colin Ireland, who resolved to become famous, and embarked on a killing spree that within three months, had resulted in the brutal murders of five gay men. 11.35 Police, Camera, Action Investigation into our most dangerous roads. 12.30am British Touring Car Championship Highlights 1.25 UEFA Champions League 1.55 Moving Day x2
6.00 The Simpsons Homer is roasted at the Springfield Friars’ Club. Earth’s fate hangs in the balance when aliens Kang and Kodos turn up. 6.30 Hollyoaks Tina is excited to be starting college, but Dominic feels sidelined. An accident prone Leila finds herself in hot water with Justin. 7.00 Channel 4 News Including sport and weather. 7.55 3 Minute Wonder: The Place Prize 2008 Short film inspired by Aletta Collins, one of the entrants in the 2008 Place Prize for contemporary dance. 8.00 Dispatches: Let Down by Labour See highlights. 9.00 The Price of Property A four-part series in which journalist Jon Henley discovers how the pursuit of property ownership has changed the country. 10.00 FILM: From Dusk Till Dawn (1996) Starring Harvey Keitel. Road movie cum horror film in which two criminal brothers on the run kidnap a family and hide out in a Mexican nightclub, only to discover that the bar’s clientele are vampires. 12.05am Party Poker Nations Cup 2008 Late-night poker action. 1.05 FIVB Beach Volleyball 2.00 KOTV Top international boxing 2.25 FIA GT Championship 2.50 Dodge Urban Beach Tour 2008 3.40 Supporting Acts 4.00 The Writing House
6.55 Mio Mao 7.00 Funky Valley 7.05 Roary The Racing Car 7.25 The Mr. Men Show 7.40 Make Way for Noddy 7.55 Fifi and the Flowertots 8.10 Peppa Pig 8.20 Thomas & Friends 8.35 Bert and Ernie’s Great Adventures 8.40 Roobarb and Custard Too 8.50 Pocoyo 9.00 The Wright Stuff 10.30 Trisha Goddard 11.30 How Not to Decorate 12.30pm Five News 12.45 House 1.45 Neighbours 2.15 Home and Away 2.50 Picture Perfect Homes 3.00 FILM: To Love, Honor And Deceive (1996) 5.00 Five News 5.30 Neighbours 6.00 Home and Away Is it all over between Aden and Belle? Roman is suspicious of Elliot. Martha has a paternity test on her unborn baby. 6.30 Animal Rescue Squad Ralph the Jack Russell is homeless because his owner is too ill to look after him. Can the North Devon Ambulance Service find him a new family? In South Africa, snake expert Shaun Boddington investigates reports of a large black snake in a back garden. 7.00 Five News National and international news. 7.30 Top Trumps: Super Ships Robert Llewellyn and Ashley Hames test their knowledge of extreme machines. 8.00 Fifth Gear Motoring magazine show. 9.00 Extreme Fishing with Robson Green Documentary profiling the hottest fishing destinations 10.00 America’s Toughest Prisons Documentary series unlocking the truth about some of America’s most notorious prisons. 11.05 FILM: Suspect A public defence lawyer jeopardises her career by collaborating with one of the jurors in the trial of a deaf-mute Vietnam War veteran accused of murder. 1.20am NFL American football action 4.50 Motorsport Mundial 5.10 Neighbours 5.35 Home and Away
6.00 BBC News News and weather. 6.30 South East Today Local news and weather. 7.00 The One Show Stories from around the country. 7.30 My Family Domestic sitcom. 7.57 BBC News and Regional News News bulletin from the BBC. 8.00 EastEnders Suzy makes a shocking discovery about Max and Whitney issues Tony with an ultimatum. 8.30 Panorama But can you hide? Simon Boazman investigates how much information is held on him, whether it’s secure and if he can reduce his data trail. 9.00 New Tricks Drama series featuring an eccentric bunch of ex-policemen. 10.00 BBC News 10.25 South East Today News, sport, weather from the South. 10.33 BBC Weather The latest weather forecast. 10.35 The Dark Side of Fame with Piers Morgan Series exploring the downside of fame. This week: Jason Donovan. 11.20 FILM: Ae Fond Kiss (2004) See film highlights. 1.00am Autumnwatch Weatherview 1.05 Sign Zone: Who Do You Think You Are? 2.05 Sign Zone: Antiques Roadshow 3.05 The Cup Comedy series. 3.35 Joins BBC News
Sky Sports 2 6.00am Aerobics: Oz Style 6.30 X-Adventures 7.00 WWE The Bottom Line 8.00 NASCAR 10.30 Tennis: Davis Cup 12.30pm NASCAR 3.00 Tennis: Davis Cup 5.00 NFL GameDay 6.30 NFL: Top Ten 7.30 Golf: How the 2008 Ryder Cup Was Won 10.00 NFL GameDay 11.00 X-Adventures 11.30 Wild Spirits 12.00am Golf: How the 2008 Ryder Cup Was Won 2.30 Big League Weekend 4.00 You’re on Sky Sports 5.30 Close
Sky Sports 3 10.30am Seamaster Sailing 11.00 Aerobics: Oz Style 11.30 Racing News 12.00pm NFL GameDay 1.30 NFL: Top Ten 2.30 Seamaster Sailing 3.00 Sportnation 4.00 Max Power 5.00 WWE Raw 7.00 NFL – Top Ten 8.00 NFL GameDay 9.30 Wild Spirits 10.00 WWE Late Night Bottom Line 11.00 WWE Late Night Afterburn 12.00am Extreme Championship Wrestling 1.00 WWE Vintage Collection 2.00 LIVE WWE Late Night Raw 4.15 Close
Alison Swann
extraterrestrial Sky One
BBC3
BBC4
ITV2
ITV3
E4
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Living
12.00pm Stargate Atlantis 1.00 Project Catwalk 2.00 Bones 3.00 Cold Case 4.00 Stargate Atlantis 5.00 Hairspray: The School Musical 6.00 Malcolm in the Middle 6.30 Futurama 7.00 The Simpsons (x4) 9.00 Ross Kemp: A Kenya Special 10.30 FILM: Rocky IV (1985) 12.15am Road Wars
7.00pm The Real Hustle (x2) 8.00 Freaky Eaters 9.00 Little Britain 9.30 The Wrong Door 10.00 EastEnders 10.30 Massive 11.00 Family Guy (x2) 11.45 Hoodies Can be Goodies 12.45am The Wrong Door 1.15 Massive 1.45 The Real Hustle 2.15 The Real Hustle 2.40 Hoodies Can be Goodies
7.00pm World News Today 7.30 Dinner with Portillo 8.00 The Rock ‘n’ Roll Years 8.30 Only Connect 9.00 1968: Storyville 10.30 RFK: Storyville 12.20am Citizen King: Storyville 2.15 Black Power Salute 3.15 Only Connect 3.45 Dinner With Portillo 4.15 Close
4.30pm Sally Jessy Raphael 5.20 The Montel Williams Show 6.05 Judge Judy (x2) 7.00 Smallville 8.00 Airline 8.30 Planet’s Funniest Animals 9.00 Hell’s Kitchen USA 10.00 Coronation Street (x2) 11.00 FILM: The Silence Of The Lambs (1991) 1.20am Haunted Homes 2.00 Teleshopping
2.50pm PD James: Shroud for a Nightingale 4.00 Daily Cooks Challenge 5.00 Film File 5.15 Goodnight Sweetheart 5.55 Heartbeat 7.00 The Wonder Years (x2) 8.00 Wycliffe 9.00 Profiling Lynda La Plante 10.00 Prime Suspect 12.10am Profiling Lynda La Plante 1.05 PD James: Shroud for a Nightingale
12.45pm Scrubs (x2) 1.45 OneTree Hill 2.40 The OC 3.35 Gilmore Girls 4.25 Hollyoaks 5.00 Friends (x2) 6.00 Scrubs (x2) 7.00 Hollyoaks 7.30 My Name is Earl 8.00 Friends (x2) 9.00 One Tree Hill 10.00 Alan Carr: Tooth Fairy Live 11.00 FILM: Planes, Trains And Automobiles (1987) 12.50am Scrubs
4.00pm A Place in the Sun (x2) 5.05 Grand Designs 6.05 Deal or No Deal 7.00 Property Ladder 8.00 More4 News 8.30 The Daily Show with Jon Stewart: Global Edition 9.00 Britain’s Worst Weather 10.00 Grand Designs 11.05 Without a Trace 12.05am Britain’s Worst Weather
12.50pm Maury 1.45 The Fix 2.00 Criminal Minds 3.00 Blood Ties 4.00 Charmed (x2) 6.00 Canada’s Next Top Model 7.00 Will and Grace (x2) 8.00 Make Me a Supermodel US 9.00 America’s Next Top Model 10.00 Lipstick Jungle 11.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 12.00am Criminal Minds
UK TV Gold
Paramount
Discovery
Sci Fi
Sky Movies
Sky Movies
Film4
TCM
5.00pm As Time Goes By 5.40 My Family 6.20 Keeping Up Appearances 7.00 Last of the Summer Wine 7.40 Dinnerladies 8.20 Some Mothers Do ‘Ave ‘Em 9.00 Open All Hours 9.40 Porridge 10.20 The Royle Family 11.00 Men Behaving Badly 11.40 I’m Alan Partridge 12.20am Open All Hours
3.00pm Two and a Half Men (x2) 4.00 The King of Queens (x2) 5.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (x2) 6.00 Frasier (x2) 7.00 Scrubs (x2) 8.00 Two and a Half Men (x3) 9.30 Rules of Engagement 10.00 Sex and the City (x2) 11.10 The King of Queens 11.40 Two and a Half Men 12.10am Rules of Engagement
4.00pm Time Team 5.00 Mythbusters 6.00 American Chopper 7.00 How Do They Do It? 7.30 How Stuff’s Made 8.00 American Chopper (x3) 11.00 Couples Who Kill 12.00am Unsolved Murders 12.30 Crime Scene USA: Body of Evidence 1.00 Crime Scene Australia 2.00 Forensic Detectives
12.05pm The Lost World 1.00 Quantum Leap 2.00 The Invisible Man 3.00 FILM: The Dead Will Tell (2004) 5.00 Thunderbirds 6.05 Angel 7.00 The Invisible Man 8.00 Medium (x2) 10.00 FILM: The Faculty (1998) 12.10am FILM: Tales From The Crypt: Demon Knight (1995) 2.00 Medium
12.40pm A Place In The Sun (1951) 2.45 The Old Dark House (1963) 4.15 Duck Soup (1933) 5.30 Julius Caesar (1970) 7.30 Road To Morocco (1942) 9.00 Funeral In Berlin (1966) 10.45 Billion Dollar Brain (1967) 12.40am Julius Caesar (1970) 2.45 A Place In The Sun (1951)
12.50pm Them (2005) 2.10 The Last Mogul: Life And Times Of Lew Wasserman (2005) 3.50 Nelly And Monsieur Arnaud (1995) 5.50 Days Of Glory (2005) 8.00 The Good German (2005) 10.00 London To Brighton (2006) 11.30 Them (2005) 12.55am This Year’s Love (1998)
1.00pm Sailor Beware! (1956) 2.40 A Kid For Two Farthings (1955) 4.30 Pineapple Express Special 4.35 Three Came Home (1950) 6.40 Unconditional Love (2002) 9.00 Mr & Mrs Smith (2005) 11.20 Witness (1985) 1.35am Personal Services (1987) 3.45 Close
8.50am Jezebel (1938) 10.40 David Copperfield (1935) 1.00pm Brigadoon (1954) 3.00 Girl Happy (1965) 4.45 Meet Me In St Louis (1944) 6.50 The 25th Hour (1967) 9.00 Fame (1980) 11.25 Demon Seed (1977) 1.10am The Night Of The Iguana (1964) 3.10 East Side, West Side (1949)
Classics
Indie