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IN THIS ISSUE
DECEMBER 2015/JANUARY 2016 - VOLUME 4, ISSUE 1
1 COVER 3 IN THIS ISSUE IN THE NEWS: 6 NATIONAL 7 INTERNATIONAL OUT ON LI: 8 20TH ANNUAL LONG ISLAND LGBT CONFERENCE RECAP 8 ENDING THE EPIDEMIC REGIONAL MEETING 8 PROJECT HELM: HEALTH INSURANCE OPEN ENROLLMENT CALENDAR OUT FRONT: 12 VERY MERRY (LGBT) HOLIDAYS OUT AND ABOUT: 16 BOOKS: THE GIFTS THAT KEEP ON GIVING 18 Q-MUSIC: ANOTHER BRITISH INVASION 20 TV ON DVD 23 BE SCENE: 20TH ANNUAL LONG ISLAND LGBT CONFERENCE LIVING HEALTHY: 24 WELLNESS: GREEN IS THE NEW SEXY 25 POSITIVE THOUGHTS: Q&A WITH MONDO GUERRA LIVING SMART: 27 HEALTHY HOLIDAY RECIPES 28 A NEW HOME: RENTING VS. BUYING 30 HOLIDAY TECH GUIDE POINTS OF VIEW: 33 TRANS-MISSIONS: THE TIP 35 HOMELESS LGBTQ YOUTH
Living Out is produced by the LGBT Network.
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ELISCIA DISTEFANO, EDITOR JONATHAN CHENKIN, ADVERTISING advertising@livingoutli.org CONTRIBUTORS Anthony DeGuzman, Oriol R. Gutierrez, Jr., Adam Lombardi, Rev. Irene Monroe, Jennifer Nyx, Rachel Roth, Gregg Shapiro, Gwendolyn Ann Smith
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vol 3, issue 5
SPECIAL PRIDE GUIDE EDITION!
PRIDE 25
Long Island Pride Parade and PrideFest Celebrates 25th Anniversary on Saturday, June 13th
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IN THE NEWS
national News
By Rachel Roth
Thousands of Mormons to leave church over new anti-lgbt Policy
Utah judge rescinds order for same-sex couple to give up foster child Juvenile Court Judge Scott Johansen has rescinded his order to take a baby away from her same-sex foster parents, April Hoagland and Beckie Peirce (above), and place her in a home with heterosexual parents. The change comes after his decision received widespread criticism. "The judge is clearly reacting to adverse publicity and critical comments regarding his controversial previous ruling," said Paul Callan, a political analyst for CNN.
about his order "being viewed as an application of religious belief rather than an application of the law." "This is the first time there has been an attempt to deprive gay foster parents of their rights to care for an adoptive child," said Callan. He said he expects to see a second wave of cases related to samesex marriages, such as adoption, employment and other issues that the Supreme Court did not address.
Callan also said that the change suggests the judge was worried
Safe haven for lgbt community finds home in Seattle businesses Starbucks' 97 stores in Seattle have signed up to a new initiative to offer safe haven to LGBT people subjected to hate crimes, reported Seattle Times. The Seattle Police Department’s (SPD) Safe Place program is the brainchild of gay police officer Jim Ritter, who also serves as the department’s full-time liaison to the city’s LGBTQ community. In addition to Starbucks, more than 60 businesses have signed on to be apart of the Safe Place program. According to the Seattle Times, businesses will
place a rainbow-badge window decal that denotes “Safe Places” around Seattle. The sticker designates businesses as places of refuge for victims of assault or harassment, particularly for members of the LGBTQ community. Employees at the businesses are trained to report the crime to police and harbor victims until cops arrive.
A Utah attorney helped thousands of Mormons formally leave the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, after LDS leaders announced a new policy barring children of LGBT people from baptism until they are 18. Attorney Mark Naugle (right) told Salt Lake City TV station KIVI that he has already heard from an estimated 1,400 people who would like his help filing formal letters of resignation, which are required to officially cut ties with the
Mormon Church and remove one's name from the church rolls that list all members worldwide. The church also updated its leadership manual listing same-sex marriage under the definition of apostasy – the rejection of church teachings.
‘HERO’ fails to win approval from voters An ordinance that would have established nondiscrimination protections for gay and transgender people in Houston failed to win approval from voters in November. The Houston Equal Rights Ordinance (HERO) – which would have applied to businesses that serve the public, such as restaurants and hotels, private employers, housing, city employment and city contracting - was rejected by a wide margin of 61% to 39%. It would have also allowed residents to file a complaint if they felt they had
been discriminated against based on the various protected categories. Religious institutions would have been exempt. Violators would have faced fines up to $5,000. While the referendum received support across the nation from White House, high-tech giant Apple and Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton, the state's top two elected leaders – Gov. Greg Abbott and Lt. Gov. Dan Patrick, both Republicans – praised the defeat, with Abbott saying the voters “showed values still matter.”
Obama supports altering civil rights act to ban lgbt discrimination President Barack Obama will go down in history as the most progressive president on LGBT rights issues. Last month he announced that he fully supports the Equality Act, which will amend the 1964 Civil Rights Act to include protections against discrimination based upon sexual orientation and/or gender identity.
The Equality Act still has to pass in the Republican-controlled house and the Senate, but the Human Rights Campaign (HRC) issued a statement saying the President’s support “sends a strong message that it’s time to put the politics of discrimination behind us once and for all.” Additionally, President Obama became the first sitting president to be on the cover of OUT magazine, under the headline “Our President: Ally. Hero. Icon.”
transgender woman jailed for eight days Long time activist & husband victims of sues Iowa hotel for discrimination hate crime in palm springs
In July 2014 a transgender woman was jailed for eight days after staff at the hotel where she was staying with a friend called the police to report that two “men dressed like women” were engaging in prostitution, is now suing. According to a complaint filed by the ACLU, Meagan Taylor and her friend, both black transgender women, spent the night at the Drury Inn in West Des Moines, Iowa, on their way to Kansas City for a funeral. But Taylor ended up spending the next eight days in a county jail for possessing her hormone drugs without a copy of her prescription. The lawsuit alleges that 6
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the Drury Inn discriminated against Taylor based on her gender identity and race, a violation of state law which defines gender identity as “a gender-related identity of a person, regardless of the person’s assigned sex at birth.” Charges were later dropped, but in a post on the ACLU’s website, Taylor said she is moving forward with the suit because “as a black trans woman, I am used to unfair and discriminatory treatment, but this was extra upsetting because we were paying customers at a hotel and on our way to a funeral.”
George Zander (below), a field manager for Equality California, and his husband, Chris, were attacked as they walked down the street holding hands. The 71-yearold long time activist was reportedly leaving Hunters Nightclub, a popular gay bar in the Palm Springs area when a man
bumped into them, shouting a gay slur. Chris says he responded by telling the man, “that's totally uncalled for," just before the man pushed him to the ground and ran away. The man later returned with a friend. Chris said one of the men struck him on the head with something, knocking him unconscious. He suffered a concussion and required staples in the back of his head and stitches in his lip. There have been no arrests made, but Palm Springs Police are investigating the assault as a felony hate crime.
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IN THE NEWS
international News
By Rachel Roth
France ends ban on gay men donating blood France’s health minister has confirmed that the country’s ban on gay blood donations will be lifted beginning in the spring of 2016. A 12-month deferral system will remain in place for some donations, but it will no longer discriminate on the basis of sexual orientation, and will instead judge each case on the basis of individual risk. Health Minister Marisol Touraine (left) said ending the ban – which will be done in stages to allow the government to study whether and how the risks change - signals the end “of a taboo and discrimination.”
Ukraine parliament promises to never support marriage equality Ukrainian Parliament chairman, Volodymyr Groysman (right), has said that the Ukrainian Verkhovna Rada will never support same-sex marriage during a debate on legislation that would outlaw LGBT based discrimination in the workplace. The anti-discrimination bill passed the vote, but Groysman made it clear in a statement on the Parliament’s website that this will not be the start of a move towards legalizing same-sex marriage.
Columbian court grants gay, lesbian couples adoption rights
In a 6-2 ruling, the Colombian Constitutional Court said that adoption agencies could not discriminate against same-sex couples during an adoption process. The decision came less than a year after the court had ruled a person could legally adopt the biological
children of their same-sex partner. In a press release, the magistrate María Victoria Calle Correa stated that; “to prevent a child from having a family only on the basis of a person’s sexual orientation would be an inacceptable restriction.”
transgender woman flees home after receiving death threats
A transgender woman was forced to leave her Northwest England home after receiving death threats. According to the Liverpool ECHO the woman, “Nat,” who asked to remain anonymous, said her life became a "living hell" after revealing to trusted neighbors she was male to female transgender. Her house was allegedly broken into repeatedly and she lost her job
after she disclosed she was taking medication for anxiety and depression. The final straw for the Meyerside resident came when she woke up one morning to find death threats painted on her door*. She reported the incident to the housing association, which then reported the incident as a hate crime to the police and arranged for her to be moved. When Nat returned to her flat to collect her belongings, she found a knife embedded in the door. Nat is speaking out as part of the launch of a program by Riverside Housing Association in Liverpool to help troubled young people avoid losing their homes. *Picture depicts staged re-enactment.
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OUT ON LI
Over 400 Attend
20th Annual LI LGBT Conference Over 400 students, educators, professionals, and community members attended the 20th Annual Long Island LGBT Conference on Tuesday, November 17th at the Stony Brook University Charles B. Wang Center.
Ending the Epidemic
Regional Meeting in Bay Shore Close to 100 health and human service providers attended the Ending the Epidemic Regional Meeting in Bay Shore on Friday, November 13th.
Hosted by the LGBT Network, the annual Long Island LGBT Conference is Long Island's only LGBT-specific conference that seeks to educate and empower students, educators, health and human service providers, and other members of the community to address the needs of LGBT people throughout the lifespan in their schools and communities. This year's conference included over 20 workshops, including "Don't Stand By, Stand Up," a workshop aimed to help stop bystander bullying. Also this year, guest speaker Kevin Schuster attended as part of LIGALY and the Network's International Youth Leader Exchange Program with the US Embassy in New Zealand. For more information on the Long Island LGBT Conference, and to keep an eye out for next year's date, visit lgbtnetwork.org/conference.
The meeting, a part of New York State's Ending the Epidemic initiative series of Statewide Regional discussions, engaged community partners in moving the Ending the Epidemic Blueprint to Action. Those in attendance, received updated information about HIV/ AIDS in the Suffolk County region, provided input on identified service gaps in the region, and participated in discussions about Ending the Epidemic. The meeting ended with a Call to Action for all participants to be part of the plan to End the AIDS Epidemic by the end of 2020.
TO SEE MORE PHOTOS FROM THE CONFERENCE, TURN TO PAGE 23.
FOR MORE INFORMATION ABOUT ENDING THE EPIDEMIC, VISIT WWW.HEALTH.NY.GOV
PROJECT HELM Healthcare Enrollment for the LGBT Market
Project HELM (Health Enrollment for the LGBT Market), is an initiative of the LGBT Network to help LGBT Long Islanders navigate their healthcare options after the passage of the Affordable Care Act. Certified application counselors are on hand to help answer questions about coverage and the enrollment process. Here is some important information to remember as the 2016 Open Enrollment Period begins:
OPEN ENROLLMENT: begins November 1st and runs through January 31, 2016. Enrollment continues throughout the year for those eligible for Medicaid, Child Health Plus, as well as those with qualifying life events.
TAX CREDIT INCOME LEVEL raised to $47,080 for an individual and $97,000 for a family of four
MEDICAID INCOME LEVEL lowered to $15,654 for an individual and $32,252 for a family of four
NYS NOW OFFERS THE NEW ESSENTIAL PLAN with a premium of either $0 or $20 for those who's income falls at or below $23,540 for individuals and $48,500 for a family of four.
EASY RENEWALS New York State has created an easy renewal process for those who enrolled through the NYS marketplace last year
For more information or for specific questions about the Affordable Care Act, please call the Health Insurance Enrollment Coordinator at 631.665.2300 or e-mail enroll@lgbtnetwork.org 8
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ALL PLANS STILL COVER all of the 10 Essential Benefits:
FREE Preventative Wellness and Chronic Disease Management, which includes flu shots, HIV/STD tests, substance use/abuse screenings; Laboratory and Imaging Services; Prescription drug coverage; Mental Health and Substance Abuse services, including counseling and psychotherapy; Ambulatory Care (doctor’s visits); Emergency Care; Hospitalization; Maternity/ New Born Care; Pediatric care, including pediatric vision and dental; Rehabilitation and Habilitative services and devices (to assist someone who is disabled, living with, or recovering from an injury or chronic illness)
DROP-IN ENROLLMENT HOURS: Center at Bay Shore Wednesdays from 5 to 8 pm (Ending January 27th)
Center at Woodbury Thursdays from 5 to 8 pm (Ending January 28th)
Hamptons LGBT Center 1st & 3rd Tuesday from 9 am to 1 pm (Ending January 26th)
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WE KNOW WHAT IT MEANS TO HAVE A FAMILY. WE HELP BUILD THEM EVERY DAY. At Long Island IVF, our team of fertility specialists are proud to help the LGBT community build the family of their dreams. When you are ready to start, Long Island IVF is here to help. Please contact us to learn more.
Melville Phone 631-752-0606
West Islip Phone 631-661-5437
Brooklyn Phone 718-375-6400
Stony Brook Phone 631-331-7575
Lake Success Phone 516-358-6363
East Patchogue Phone 631-687-2229
www.longislandivf.com
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SHOW YOUR PRIDE
CALENDAR OF EVENTS SAGE-LI Holiday Extravaganza Saturday, Dec. 9th, 5:30 p.m. Piccola Bussola 159 Jericho Tpke., Mineola Join us for a catered festive dinner, live music by Lydia Sabosto, dancing, and great company! Piccola Bussola is located at 159 Jericho Turnpike in Mineola. Please feel free to bring family, friends, and loved ones. Valet parking is available. Admission is $37 per person and space is limited. RSVP with payment is required by Wednesday, December 16th. www.lgbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300
SAGE-LI Health Series: Avoiding Scams and Money Traps Monday, Dec. 21st, 1 p.m. Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore Timeshares, vacation packages, telemarketers, and work-at-home schemes. Don't be duped! Join us for this preventative workshop provided by Bethpage Federal Credit Union and stop scammers in their tracks! Lunch is provided for attendees! www.lgbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300
Be Proud, Be Responsible. Saturday, Dec. 19th, 11 am - 5 pm Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore Get the sex ed you won't get in health class! "Be Proud! Be Responsible" is a fun full-day workshop dedicated to providing LGBT youth, their friends, and allies with the power to make proud and responsible choices concerning their sexual health. Upon completion, all participants will receive a $20 gift card for attending. Free pizza! Prizes will be given for active participation. Free van transportation will be available. www.lgbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300
20 Something 2nd & 4th Fridays, 7:30-9 p.m Nassau: Center at Woodbury, 20 Crossways Park Dr. North, Suite 110, Woodbury Discussion and support group for LGBT people in their 20’s. A safe and affirming space to share their experiences. www.lgbtnetwork.org, 516.323.0011
Alcoholics Anonymous Tuesdays, 8-9 p.m. Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore Closed group for all ages. www.lgbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300
Drop-In Health Insurance Enrollment: Wednesdays, 5-8 p.m. Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore Thursdays, 5-8 p.m. Nassau: Center at Woodbury, 20 Crossways Park Dr. North, Suite 110, Woodbury 1st & 3rd Mondays, 9am -1 pm East End: The Hamptons LGBT Center, 44 Union St., Sag Harbor www.lgbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300
Drop-In HIV/STD Testing: Wednesdays, 5-8 p.m. Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore Thursdays, 5-8 p.m. Nassau: Center at Woodbury, 20 Crossways Park Dr. North, Suite 110, Woodbury By Appointment. East End: The Hamptons LGBT Center, 44 Union St., Sag Harbor Free and confidential testing for HIV, Syphilis, Gonorrhea, Chlamydia, and Hepatitis C. www.lgbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300
Hampton Bays Mingle 2nd & 4th Thursdays, 3-5 p.m. Hampton Bays Senior Center, 25 Ponquogue Ave., Hampton Bays SAGE-LI’s bi-monthly social for LGBT seniors 50+ on the East End. www.lgbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300
LIFE in Nassau 2nd Thursday, 7-9 p.m. Nassau: Center at Woodbury, 20 Crossways Park Dr. North, Suite 110, Woodbury LIFE in Nassau meets every second Thursday. Open to adults of all genders and orientations with an interest in BDSM topics.
LIGALY Advisory Board Advisory Board (SAGE-LI) Mondays, 6-8 p.m. Monday, January 4th, 1-2 p.m. Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore Youth help plan new programs and Tuesday, January 5th 1-2 p.m. events at LIGALY. Nassau: Center at Woodbury, www.lgbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300 20 Crossways Park Dr. North, Suite 110, Woodbury LIPSA Tuesday Night Tease We want to hear your voice! This group Bowling League provides feedback on current SAGE-LI Tuesdays, 7:30 p.m. programming, offers ideas for additional Bowl Long Island, programming, and helps plan future 138 West Rd., Patchogue events. All are welcome! www.lgbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300
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Friendliest co-ed/mixed LGBT Bowling League. LIPSAbowling@optonline.net, 516.375.9473
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LITE Social and Discussion Group 1st & 3rd Mondays, 7:30-9 p.m. Nassau: Center at Woodbury, 20 Crossways Park Dr. North, Suite 110, Woodbury Wednesdays, 7:30-9 p.m. Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore 1st, 3rd, 5th Wednesdays are closed. 2nd & 4th Wednesdays are open. 2nd & 4th Thursdays, 6:30-8 p.m.
East End: The Hamptons LGBT Center, 44 Union St., Sag Harbor
PEP Teams – Suffolk Thursdays, 6-8 p.m. Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore
You Gotta Believe Mondays, 6-9 p.m. Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore
Interactive leadership program promoting sexual health for LGBT young people. www.lgbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300
The Long Island LGBT Community Center has partnered with You Gotta Believe, a non-profit organization that places teenagers into permanent adoptive homes, to provide Adoptive Parent Preparation Classes! If you are interested in participating, please call 631.665.2300. www.lgbtnetwork.org
Safe Schools Team Wednesdays, 6-8 p.m. Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore
Youth leadership program for young people committed to creating safer A closed discussion group for transgender schools on Long Island. people and their friends and family. www.lgbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300 www.lgbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300
Living PositHIVly 1st & 3rd Mondays, 12 - 1 p.m. Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore
SAGE-LI Evening Mingle 3rd Wednesday, 7-9 p.m. Nassau: Center at Woodbury, 20 Crossways Park Dr. North, Suite 110, Woodbury
A support group for LGBT and allies living If you workand/or have engagements with HIV/AIDS. during the day that limit you from www.lgbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300 attending the fabulous SAGE-LI daytime programming, this is the program for Monday Mingle you. All are welcome! Mondays, 11 a.m.-1 p.m. www.lgbtnetwork.org, 516.323.0011
Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore
SAGE-LI’s weekly social for LGBT seniors 50+ at The Center at Bay Shore. www.lgbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300
Nassau County Mingle Tuesdays, 11 a.m.-1 p.m. Nassau: Center at Woodbury, 20 Crossways Park Dr. North, Suite 110, Woodbury SAGE-LI’s weekly social for LGBT seniors 50+ at The Center at Woodbury. There is no NC Mingle on Tuesday, December 15th. www.lgbtnetwork.org, 516.323.0011
OUTlet Fridays, 8 p.m.-Midnight Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore Friday night social program for LGBT youth and their friends ages 13-21. $2 admission, transportation available. Themes for December include: Holiday Extravaganza(12/22). www.lgbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300
Parent Support Group 1st & 3rd Thursdays, 6-7 p.m. Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore 1st & 3rd Mondays, 6-7 p.m. Nassau: Center at Woodbury, 20 Crossways Park Dr. North, Suite 110, Woodbury If you workand/or have engag Discussion group for parents of LGBT children. www.lgbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300
Youth Group Tuesdays, 5-7 p.m. East End: The Hamptons LGBT Center, 44 Union St., Sag Harbor All East End youth should come check out this new hot LGBT spot. Every Tuesday is a fun interactive youth group: hang out with others in the lounge. You won’t want to miss it! Themes for December include: Seasonal Sweets Swap (12/22); LGBT Movie Night (12/29). www.lgbtnetwork.org, 631.899.4950
SAGE-LI Women at Nassau Wednesdays, 7:30-8:45 p.m. Nassau: Center at Woodbury, 20 Crossways Park Dr. North, Suite 110, Woodbury
(SWAN) A social and discussion group for lesbian, bisexual, & transgender women as well as women questioning their identity. There is no SWAN Wednesday, December 16th. www.lgbtnetwork.org, 516.323.0011
Senior Focus Discussion Group Last Monday, 1-2 p.m. Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore Last Tuesday, 1-2 p.m. Nassau: Center at Woodbury, 20 Crossways Park Dr. North, Suite 110, Woodbury Part of a monthly series of coed peer-led, issue-focused discussion groups. www.lgbtnetwork.org, 516.323.0011
TRUE Calling Tuesdays, 6-8 p.m. Nassau: Center at Woodbury 20 Crossways Park Dr. North, Suite 110, Woodbury LIGALY is offering a great opportunity for LGBT youth and their friends to show off their skills! Sing, act, dance, or perform. www.lgbtnetwork.org, 516.323.0011
Women 2 Women Tuesdays, 7:15-8:45 p.m. Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore W2W is dedicated to providing a safe and supportive space for lesbians age 40+.
THE COMMUNITY CENTERS OF THE LGBT NETWORK WILL BE CLOSED ON THE FOLLOWING DAYS: THURSDAY, DECEMBER 24TH FRIDAY, DECEMBER 25TH THURSDAY, DECEMBER 31ST FRIDAY, JANUARY 1ST
LIVING OUT AND THE LGBT NETWORK WOULD LIKE TO WISH EVERYONE HAPPY HOLIDAYS AND A HAPPY AND HEALTHY NEW YEAR! LIVING OUT
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OUT FRONT
Merry & Bright LGBT Families talk about holiday traditions, de-gendering toys, and New Year’s Resolutions
As this holiday season approaches, one can’t help but feel the joy and happiness that comes from spending time with family. Two years ago, Living Out published an article about how the holiday season could be a time of stress and anxiety for some in the LGBT community. Since then, society as a whole has seen a shift in how a “traditional” family is viewed. 2015 has been a remarkable year for progress in the LGBT communities fight for equality. In June, the Supreme Court of the United States ruled in favor of marriage equality, making it the “law of the land.” In a 5-4 ruling, Justice Anthony Kennedy wrote for the majority with the four liberal justices. Almost 46 years to the day after the Stonewall Riots ushered in the modern gay rights movement, the decision has settled one of the major civil rights fights of this era. In the landmark opinion, Kennedy wrote, “no union is more profound than marriage, for it embodies the highest ideals of love, fidelity, devotion, sacrifice and family. 12
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In forming a marital union, two people become something greater than they once were.” The moral of the story? Love wins.
Holiday Traditions With the image of “traditional” families fading out of view, many studies show that children raised by LGBT parents are more well adjusted than those raised in “traditional” households. Larry and Matt, fathers to 5-year-old CJ, said they are constantly addressing the importance of family and how they are always there for each other as a unit (I protect you, you protect me, we are one happy family). “I feel that in other households, it’s assumed. But we go out of our way to stress the importance of it. "Also," Larry says, "we have a tremendous support network. Both of our extended families live here and we have surrounded ourselves with friends who support us. CJ, even at the age of 5, sees this. He is extremely confident, personable, and outgoing.
By Alexis Capitini with contributions by Adam Lombardi
Not to mention very smart. He views himself as just like every other kid, yet he knows he is extremely special. We believe that he prides himself with the fact that he has two dads and an Aunt “D”. We believe there is strength in numbers.” Dawn, a mother of two, thinks there are enormous advantages to children being raised in any open-minded family. “Kids want to be loved and cared for, they aren't concerned about what gender their parents are. I believe when they're raised in homes that accept others for who they are, they learn to do the same. My children are more open minded and understanding of those who some may see as, ‘different.’” Love, acceptance and respect are a big part of family values and these values play a special role during the holidays. Mary, mother to transgender son Parker, believes being supportive is the way it should be for every child. “Looking back now, I do see the differences before and after my child came out as a transgender boy. Prior to that
day, and from a very young age, he was always considered a tomboy. He easily played with both the girls and the boys. The “boys” toys and activities did interest him more and as he grew older the girls wanted to play less with him and the boys just didn't want a "girl" hanging around them as much,” she says. “I feel that left my son a little bit in limbo socially. That was difficult for him and he spent a lot of time alone.” In November 2013, as the holidays were approaching, Mary and Parker discussed the holidays and decided together that they would wait to tell the family after the New Year. “I have a big family and everyone is a bit geographically spread out. We choose a day between Christmas and New Year's to get together to celebrate and exchange gifts.” Mary says that “prior to our family get together, my son decided he wanted to cut his hair and have a more masculine appearance. My family thought it looked great and didn't give too much thought to the new, very short haircut.
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OUT FRONT I guess they just thought it went along with the tomboy image.” Since then, “family gatherings are still as they always were, the only things that have changed as a result of my son coming out are his name and his pronouns. My family is very supportive, loving and accepting. The feedback from the family is that they have noticed my son is more engaged and talks more to everyone.” Holidays are a precious time to focus on family and to be grateful for those you have in your life. “When Matt and I came out, we had both given up on the fact that we would have children. When CJ was born, we felt that we were given something back and we were going to take full advantage of it. Our priorities completely changed once he was born,” Larry said. “I left my 50+ hour a week, higher paying job for a position that was 35-40 hours, less paying position. It took us a long time to have CJ and was a very conscious decision on our part to make that commitment, so we strive to spend as much time as possible with him.” From Christmas to Hanukkah to Kwanza, each holiday has its own traditions that families take part in. Dawn, and her partner Annette, celebrate by decorating the house and putting up a tree. Dawn says they also, “make cookies for Santa on Christmas Eve while our kids, Kayla and Ethan, get in their PJ's and open one gift. And of course we eat lots of delicious food!” Larry and Matt have started some of their own traditions by “getting a personalized ornament for the tree. We are now working on number 14. Matt
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and I pick it out, but CJ gets to put it on the tree,” says Larry. “Every year, we see the Rockefeller Tree and drive through the Jones Beach Light Show. Around the holidays means more family time. Period. CJ loves his cousins, grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc. The moment he hears any of their names, he responds
Toys, Toys, Toys with ‘Can we see them now?’” Gift giving is a major part of the modern holiday custom and this year there has been a movement to de-gender toys and dolls among other things. In a move met with both applause and anger, Target announced a cut back on its use of gender-based signage in certain departments. In a statement on their blog, A Bullseye View, Target said that they “know that shopping preferences and needs change and, as guests have pointed out, in some departments like Toys, Home or Entertainment, suggesting products by gender is unnecessary.” The move was met with certain opposition, with one critic saying, “one has to wonder where this will end. The White House announced in April that it was installing a gender-neutral bathroom in the Eisenhower Executive Office Building next to the West Wing.” Others praised the mega-retailer saying that “Target is a trendsetter” and other “retailers have an incredible opportunity here. They’re opening up a whole world of possibility for these kids.” A spokeswoman for Target told the Huffington Post, “we recognize by coming out and making these couple changes that people are going to have
a wide variety of opinions. We expected and respect that. The response from the guests has been overwhelmingly positive.” This idea seems to be widely embraced throughout the LGBT community. “I think the movement to de-gender toys is understandable. It's difficult to understand why people get so bent out of shape over boys playing with dolls. My kids haven't asked for any "surprising" gifts (except for the price!) but if they did, I wouldn't make too much out of it. I would let them know that other people might not understand so if they want it, they need to own it and not let the opinions of others effect them,” says Dawn. It’s not surprising that young children’s interests are wide and expanding. Larry says, “CJ is all over the map this year. Ranging for Legos and trucks to a kitchen set. Even at 5, he has so many diverse interests
and we let him have them without question.” “Our household is just the two of us now,” Mary says. “When my son was younger, his Christmas lists always consisted of toys designed for both genders. Spiderman pajamas, a basketball and an easy bake oven. This type of request didn't surprise us. He was a tomboy and his dad and I both thought it was fine. We never tried to push traditional gender specific or gender appropriate toys. As long as he was happy, we were happy.”
Resolutions As December 31st approaches and we count down the seconds to the New Year, we also take time to reflect back on the things that have happened during the year. We make a New Year’s resolution to remind ourselves about what we want to do during the next year. For some, this LIVING OUT
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may simply be; eat healthy, workout more, or to kick a bad habit, among other things. But for others, a New Years resolution may be more important and special. In 2016, Larry and Matt say they “are going to look into adoption and/or foster care. CJ wants a little brother or sister, or both.” One of the most hopeful resolutions is to “be happy and stay healthy.” This is Dawn’s resolution after a difficult year of losing her father to brain cancer and having other family members effected by cancer and illness.
When asked if there was one message they’d like the Long Island community to know or understand about LGBT families, the message was the same across the board, “we are family, just like every other family.” Larry and Matt also had a special message for the LGBT community specifically: “Don’t be afraid to start a family. We have yet to come across any sort of discrimination as a family. This may not be the normal for all of Long Island, but it definitely was an initial concern for us. In fact, we have had the opposite effect. When we have told people that we are a same sex couple with a child, we have received reactions, like ‘That’s great!’ and ‘Yay, finally!’” For those families who don’t feel they have the support they need, the Center Family Project,
a program of the LGBT Network (the Network), has been working diligently to schedule one event each month for families to come together, make lasting bonds and friendships, and just have a good time together. These events rotate through all of the Network’s centers to best accommodate LGBT families across Long Island. The Network's Center Family Project (CFP) has been growing exponentially. Last month CFP hosted a family potluck close to Thanksgiving for all to share a meal with one another for the holiday. “Families really enjoyed getting together as a group and sharing a beautiful evening of home-cooked treats and family activities,” says Michelle Raider, Center Family Project Coordinator. So as this holiday season approaches, let us remember that everyone just wants to be loved, accepted, and respected. Let us be kind to one another, even if our views
We are family. Just like every other family. are different. Gather around with your family and be thankful and grateful for those you have in your life, and celebrate your uniqueness. While LGBT households do face some unique challenges and responsibilities, at the end of the day, family is family and we are all the same. For more information on the LGBT Network's Center Family Project please visit: lgbtnetwork.org
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OUT AND ABOUT
book gift guide
Books The holidays are approaching. Gift lists are being assembled. Remember that you can’t sign an e-book. So kindly refrain from purchasing any of those as gifts this season. Instead, give someone a nicely bound hardcover or paperback book. According to various media outlets, indie booksellers are on the rise (even with Amazon’s price-fixing afoot) and e-book sales are on the decline. Patronize your neighborhood independent bookseller and feel good about supporting a local business while buying a gift that will give pleasure to the recipient time and again.
Eating and Drinking Gone With The Gin: Cocktails With a Hollywood Twist (Running Press, 2015) by Tim Federle, the followup to the gay writer’s 2013 book Tequila Mockingbird: Cocktails With a Literary Twist, fifty luscious libations including A Clockwork Orange Julius, Indiana Jones and the Shirley Temple of Doom, The Rocky Horror Pisco Show, Bloody Mary Poppins, The Wizard of Shiraz, and Tequila Sunrise Boulevard, all ready for their close-ups. A tasty (and very funny) companion to the popular and multi-award-winning ABC sitcom, The Modern Family Cookbook (Melcher Media/ Oxmoor House, 2015) features 100 “easy-tomake recipes” credited to the show’s wacky and loveable characters (such as Gloria, Mitch, Cam, Phil and Luke), as well as supporting players including Andy and Pepper. Full of color photos, scenes from the series and much more, The Modern Family Cookbook is delish!
Poetic License Caprice (Sibling Rivalry) by Denise Duhamel and Maureen Seaton, subtitled Collaborations: Collected, Uncollected and New, does a brilliant job of compiling the multi-award-winning poets’ collaborative work, including 1997’s Exquisite Politics, chapbooks Oyl (2000) and Little Novels (2002), assorted uncollected poems, interviews and remarkable new collaborations including 2015’s Gender’s Tidy Little Stories about Itself, and more. 16
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by gregg shapiro
giving
are still the gifts that keep on Chosen by Terrance Hayes for the 2014 Cave Canem Poetry Prize, Boy With Thorn (University of Pittsburg Press, 2015) by Ricki Laurentiis, the gay, African-American poet’s debut collection, features ekphrastic poetry, a ghazal, and stunning poems about race and sexuality that stay with the reader long after the book is closed. The 60th Anniversary edition of City Lights Pocket Poets Anthology (City Lights, 2015), edited by Lawrence Ferlinghetti, includes queer poets such as Allen Ginsberg, Frank O’Hara, Robert Duncan, Peter Orlovsky, Antler and Harold Norse, as well as beat poetry legends Jack Kerouac, Gregory Corso, Anne Waldman, Bob Kaufman and others. Featuring illustrations by Ashley Holt, Laura Hallett, Erin Maala, Ben Baldwin, Rob Appleby and others, acclaimed Southern gay poet/writer and educator Jeff Mann’s Rebels (Lethe Press, 2015) is a poetry collection in which the poet “queers” the Civil War.
In Their Own Words She may have once said (and sung) that she wouldn’t do it, but you’ll be glad that she did when you read I’ll Never Write My Memoirs (Gallery, 2015) by Grace Jones, as told to Paul Morley, in which the grand dame of disco, fashion and experimental expression shares her love for the gays, her Jamaican homeland, theater and film, music, art and a great deal more, all told in her open and distinctive style. One of the most wellrespected voices in gay journalism and activism, Philadelphia Gay News’ Mark Segal tells the remarkable story of his journey in his memoir And Then I Danced (Open Lens, 2015), subtitled Traveling the Road to LGBT Equality, complete with several pages of color photos.
A compilation of “performance texts” from renowned and provocative performance artist Karen Finley (one of the notorious NEA Four), the expanded 25th Anniversary edition of Shock Treatment (City Light, 1990/2015), contains her legendary writings on homophobia and AIDS (including “The Black Sheep”), as well as feminism and more. Musician and “comedic artist” Greg Scarnici assembles his humorous writings in the essay collection I Hope My Mother Doesn’t Read This (Thought Catalog, 2015), covering topics such as Liza Minnelli, acting classes, music, oral sex, Madonna, International Male, coffee and travel. In That’s What Fashion Is: Lessons and Stories From My Nonstop, Mostly Glamorous Life in Style (Thomas Dunne/ St. Martin’s, 2015), gay former Elle creative director and current editor in chief and executive creative officer at Yahoo Style Joe Zee tells his tres chic story in words and pictures. Until My Heart Stops: Intimate Writings (Chelsea Station Editions, 2015), an anthology of more than 50 essays and memoirs by prolific gay writer Jameson Currier, several of which debuted during the peak of the AIDS epidemic, spans a 30 period. Gay writer David Plante, author of the queer lit classic The Catholic, follows up his 2013 book Becoming A Londoner: a diary with Worlds Apart: A Memoir (Bloomsbury, 2015), about his life with lover Nikos Stangos during the 1980s, in a variety of locales, including Jerusalem, rural Ireland and Tulsa, Oklahoma. Australian surfer Peter Drouyn made his name through “power surfing,” while also trying his hand at various other occupations. However, the most significant event in his life occurred in 2012 when he underwent gender reassignment surgery and emerged as Westerly Windina, something written about with sensitivity and insight by Jamie Brisick in Becoming Westerly (Outpost19, 2015).
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Good Morning America producer Mary Pflum Peterson’s memoir White Dresses (Morrow, 2015) tells the story of her mother Anne through the titular garments that figured into Anne’s time as a nun and later her failed marriage to Mary’s father, a closeted gay man, as well as others that appeared throughout her life.
Fiction Festival Gay literary agent and author Bill Clegg (the memoir Portrait of an Addict as a Young Man), makes his fiction debut with the novel Did You Ever Have A Family (Scout Press, 2015), about the aftermath of a devastating tragedy. Depraved Heart (Morrow, 2015), lesbian mystery writer Patricia Cornwell’s 22nd novel in the Dr. Kay Scarpetta series, features medical examiner extraordinaire Scarpetta dealing with a horrifying family crisis involving her niece Lucy. Subtitled “An Illuminated Novel,” it’s safe to say that Featherproof Books’ Zachary Thomas Dodson’s expansive dystopian debut novel Bats of the Republic (Doubleday, 2015), complete with the author’s own graphics and an attached ribbon book mark, doesn’t look or read like anything you’ve ever seen before as it traverses a 300 year time period, from 1843 to 2143, and features a gay dad as a major character. Renowned gay voice over actor and playwright James Sie lets the page do the talking in his debut novel Still Life Las Vegas (St. Martin’s Press, 2015). The book, a coming of age story in which Walter discovers the truth about his family history, includes illustrations by Sungyoon Choi. Combining issues of identity – social, queer and immigrant – on a global scale, Ioannis Pappos’ sexy debut novel Hotel Living (Harper Perennial, 2015) succeeds in making the world of the pre-2008 financial crisis an erotically charged place. Award-winning lesbian writer Nina Revoyr returns with her fifth novel Lost Canyon (Akashic, 2015), described as a “wilderness thriller” about four people from Los Angeles – two men and two men – who embark on a backpacking excursion through the Sierra Nevada and encounter more than they had bargained for.
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Colorful and comical, Michael Graves’ new novel Parade (Chelsea Station Editions, 2015) follows teen-aged cousins gay Reggie and straight Elmer on their odyssey from dull suburbia to sunny Florida in a stolen limo in the company of a retired televangelist and an assortment of unusual characters. Tuesdays with Morrie author Mitch Albom has made a career of tugging at our heartstrings and his latest novel, the musically-oriented The Magic Strings of Frankie Presto (Harper, 2015). Playwright/journalist/essayist Sigal Samuel tales us deep into the heart of the Mile End neighborhood in Montreal, “a mash-up of hipsters and Hasidic Jews,” in The Mystics of Mile End (William Morrow, 2015), her debut novel.
The Whole Truth Inspired by the Tumblr of the same name, The Notorious RBG: The Life and Times of Ruth Bader Ginsburg (Dey Street, 2015) by Irin Carmon and Shana Knizhnik celebrates Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg “in all her glory,” through words and pictures.
Words and Music Published in time to honor the centennial of the late, groundbreaking gay jazz legend Billy Strayhorn, Strayhorn: An Illustrated Life (Bolden/Agate, 2015), edited by A. Alyce Claerbaut and David Schlesinger, with a foreword by Ramsey Lewis, does a fantastic job of telling Strayhorn’s melodious story through words and images.
For Younger Readers The trans narrative in George (Scholastic, 2015), a Y/A novel for readers of all ages, by gender-queer writer/activist Alex Gino, tells the story of Melissa, born George, who wants the lead in the school production of Charlotte’s Web and how she and best friend Kelly devise a plan to get the part, while settling the gender identity issue “once and for all.” Ketzel, the Cat who Composed (Candlewick Press, 2015), the latest children’s book by Heather Has Two Mommies author Lesléa Newman, with illustrations by Amy June Bates, is the story of composer/pianist Moshe Cotel, and the kitten with whom he made beautiful music, and is sure to delight readers of all ages. Described as “a music primer for children,” What Is Punk? (Akashic Books), by Eric Morse with illustrations by Anny Yi, is written in rhyme with photos of colorful clay characters and settings, to recreate the history of the “deafening roar/that awakened the people,/ like never before,” and includes figurines representing New York Doll David Johansen (in high heels), icons Debbie Harry, Lou Reed, Henry Rollins, and all-female band The Slits.
Encyclopedia Madonnica 20 (Boy Culture), the updated 20th anniversary edition of the “Madonna bible” by Madonna-obsessed writer Matthew Rettenmund, loaded with previously unseen pix, original illustrations and more, includes celeb interviews, “one-word descriptions” and more between front and back covers by Richard Corman and Kiri Teshigahara, respectively. The “graceful” coffee table book Hippie Chick: A Tale of Love Devotion & Surrender (Rock Out Books, 2015) contains almost 450 images by renowned rock photographer Jay Blakesburg, paying homage to the “earth mamas, fairy princesses, hula hoopers, whirling dervishes, front row regulars and flower-crown makers,” barefoot or booted, in bikini tops & long skirts, on whom Blakesburg has focused his lens at music festivals and concerts for 35 years. LIVING OUT
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OUT AND ABOUT
Q-music
by gregg shapiro
Another British Invasion
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Muse (right), the 21st century progrock adherents, combine the drama of Queen and politics of Pink Floyd on the concept album Drones (WB). Complete with a pair of skits, “[Drill Sergeant]” and “[JFK],” Drones makes a statement, whether or not you’re paying attention. Like Muse’s aforementioned predecessors, the trio isn’t afraid to color outside of the hard rock lines, as they do on the new wave funk of “Dead Inside” and the a cappella title cut. Muse is at its theatrical best on the Queen-like “Mercy” and the mini-epic “The Globalist.”
At 25, Laura Marling is a music industry vet, with five studio albums to her name, the first of which was released when she was just 18. The music on her fifth disc Short Movie (Ribbon) may not be as varied as say, that of her debut Alas I Cannot Swim, but it definitely succeeds on its own merits. Opener “Warrior” is one of a few songs, including “How Can I” that recall vintage acoustic Joni Mitchell. Marling reaffirms her own distinct artistry on the title cut, as well as on “False Hope,” “Don’t Let Me Bring You Down” and “Divine.”
It’s the listeners who benefit from The Vaccines infectious assortment of influences on English Graffiti (Columbia), the Brit quartet’s third album. Snotty as they want to be on irresistible opener “Handsome,” they strut their funky selves on “Minimal Affection” and go for breathless punk on “20/20” and “Radio Bikini.” “(All Afternoon) In Love” is a new kind of hybrid – a break-up song crossed with a love song and “Undercover” is almost too pretty for its own good. Get vaccinated!
As this year’s class of British invaders goes, Glass Animals (left) stands out for its uniqueness on Zaba (Harvest), beginning with the opening track “Flip.” With the less than subtle suggestion of violence set against a hypnotic and raw melody, the song hooks the listener like an illegal narcotic. “Pools” provides the first definitive dance beat on the disc giving you the excuse you need to dive in and shake it. “Gooey” might be the stickiest chill-out number of the year and “WYRD” is as weird as it is wired.
Olivia Chaney (right) may make references to her “Chelsea Mourning” in “Imperfections,” but she owes more to Linda Thompson and Sandy Denny than Joni Mitchell on her neo-traditional folk debut album The Longest River (Nonesuch). Combining potent originals including “Loose Change,” “Too Social,” the gorgeous “Holiday” and the aforementioned “Imperfections,” with a traditional such as “False Bride” and “There’s Not A Swain,” an adaptation of a 1693 text by Henry Purcell and Anthony Henley.
Former X-Factor competitor Ella Henderson’s hopefully titled album Chapter One (SYCO/Columbia) is a pleasing, if undistinguished introduction to the singer/songwriter. Henderson has a powerful set of pipes which she employs to great advantage on the occasionally bombastic tunes, including “Empire” and “Pieces.” When she reins it in, as she does on “Missed,” “Yours,” and “Mirror Man,” she sounds more like herself than someone trying too hard to be the British Kelly Clarkson or Katy Perry.
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OUT AND ABOUT
screen savor
by gregg shapiro
SURFACE GUIDANCE At 22, having grown up in group and foster homes, aimless Evan (Harry Hains) is learning that it can take a lifetime to find yourself in Michael J. Saul’s The Surface (Ariztical/Aimes). Evan (below) is a broke college student, with a passion for swimming, living with his financially stable boyfriend Chris (Nicholas McDonald), who has a habit of being insensitive to him.
Things change when Evan buys an old movie camera at a yard sale. Harry (Robert Weiner), the man who sells Evan the camera, offers to let him use his editing equipment if it doesn’t sell. After getting his developed reels back, Evan decides to take Harry up on his offer only to learn from Harry’s son Peter (Michael Redford), now living in his father’s house, that Harry has died. Peter gives Evan the equipment, including a projector and some old home movies that he was going to get rid of. These artifacts have an
surprising creative effect on Evan and he ends up turning them into a short film to be screened at a student film festival.
The movie is well-received which has unexpected consequences. Chris, who liked having Evan being dependent on him, realizes that Evan was more talented than he had ever acknowledged. It also brings out a streak of jealousy in Chris because Evan has been working for Peter, tending to the garden and cleaning the pool. Meanwhile, Evan’s movie stirred up all sorts of feelings in Peter who had more or less taken his childhood experiences for granted. Seeing them spliced together in Evan’s movie has a profound effect on him. After a disagreement with Chris, Evan finds himself at Peter’s, leading to a romantic encounter. With all of this conflict, The Surface could have easily fallen into the trap of being a soap opera, but Saul’s script is more sophisticated and intelligent than that. Clichés are few and far between. Instead, The Surface goes deep, with thoughtful observations such as the people that you meet along the way to finding yourself are special and important, but they are not the journey. As irreverent and inappropriate as gay comedy can get, Guidance (Strand/Edyson) will have you laughing out loud, while looking around you to make sure you aren’t the only one doing it. Pathologically immature David (Pat Mills, who also wrote and directed) had a modicum of fame as a child actor on a kids’ TV show. Now an irresponsible adult with a serious drinking problem, a cancerous growth on his shoulder and the inability to keep a job, pay bills and make rent,
he stumbles upon an opening as an interim high school guidance counselor, a position for which he is ill equipped. David, the kind of guy who blacks out the faces of his relatives in a family portrait, assumes the identity of Roland, a high school guidance counselor he saw on YouTube. While on campus, he taunts resident discipline problem Desmond (David A. Wontner), insults the staff, including gay gym teacher Scott (David Tompa), makes friendless shy girl Rhonda (Eleanor Zichy) a personal project, does alcohol shots in his office with student Jabrielle (Zahra Bentham), bonds with "goth" girl Alexondria (Emily Piggford) and gets high with the newly expelled pot dealer Brent, aka Ghost (Alex Ozerov). However, it doesn’t take long for everything to unravel, beginning with Scott’s discovery of David/ Roland’s true identity while they are on a date, courtesy of a waitress who was a fan of David’s show. Then Guidance abruptly shifts gears to become a campy Bonnie and Clyde tale. Guidance makes some interesting observations, including that there is “nothing more repulsive to a teenager than taking life advice from someone who went to school to help teenagers.” David, who “exists in the space between caring too much and not giving a f*ck,” must eventually face his problems. His jailhouse finale rocks.
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OUT AND ABOUT
dvd gift guide
by gregg shapiro
Something For (almost) Everyone! TV on DVD The highs and lows (emphasis on highs) of the Emmy-winning Showtime series Nurse Jackie (Lionsgate) came to a devastating conclusion in the seventh and final season. In addition to lead character Jackie (Edie Falco) falling hard off the wagon, we got to attend the gay wedding of nurse Thor (Steve Wallem), as All Saints Hospital was being pulled out from under the staff by greedy condo developers. DVD + Digital special features include deleted scenes, audio commentaries by cast and crew, a gag reel and a trio of featurettes. For a show about two straight women, 2 Broke Girls (WB) is one of the gayest shows on TV. That might have something to do with openly gay creator Michael Patrick King (Sex and the City). Seriously, just listen to some of the things that come out of the mouths of the titular “broke girls” Max (Kat Dennings) and Caroline(Beth Behrs), as well as supporting actress Jennifer Coolidge as the always inappropriate Sophie. DVD special features include unaired scenes and a gag reel.
Truly Trans I Am the Queen (Cinema Libre Studio), a doc produced and directed by Henrique Cirne Lima and Josué Pellot, is the story of Bianca, Julissa and Jolizza, in preparation for the Vida/Sida Cacia Pageant within the Puerto Rican community of Chicago’s Humboldt Park neighborhood, under the direction of trans mentor Ginger Valdez. DVD special features include deleted scenes and a photo gallery. 20
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Winner of the Tribeca Film Festival audience award for documentary, the Puerto Rico-set Mala Mala (Strand), produced and directed by Dan Sickles and Antonio Santini, focuses on trans activist Ivana, sex-change pioneer Soraya, sexworker Sandy, and Samantha and Paxx, both of whom dealing with the necessary medical resources to complete their transition. DVD bonus features include the new short Sandy’s Pets and three photo galleries.
Lesbian Landmarks The digitally restored DVD of the 1987 lesbian classic She Must Be Seeing Things (First Run Features), stars Sheila Dabney as international lawyer Agatha and Lois Weaver as her lover Jo, a filmmaker. Written and directed by Sheila McLaughlin, the movie is about jealousy and sexual obsession and what the combination of those two factors can do to a relationship. Bonus materials include an interview with McLaughlin and the 1978 short film Inside Out. Acclaimed lesbian filmmaker Monika Treut (My Father Is Coming, Virgin Machine and Gendernauts: A Journey Through Shifting) returns with the dramatic coming-of-age story Of Girls and Horses (Wolfe), in which rebellious teen Alex (Ceci Chuh) finds herself attracted to lesbian riding instructor Nina (Vanida Karun).
Keep Calm & Carrying On The triple disc Blu-ray + DVD combo pack 50th anniversary edition of My Fair Lady (CBS/ Paramount), the Oscarwinning movie adaptation of the beloved Lerner and Loewe musical starring Audrey Hepburn and Rex Harrison, and featuring cherished songs such as “I Could Have Danced All Night,” “On The Street Where You Live,” “I’ve Grown Accustomed To Her Face” and “Get Me To The Church On Time,” is every show tune lover’s dream come true. The wealth of special features include three theatrical featurettes, Cecil Beaton costume sketches, “More Loverly Than Ever: The Making of My Fair Lady Then & Now,” and much more. Gemma Bovery (Music Box Films), on Blu-ray, is described as a modern-day take on Gustave Flaubert’s Madame Bovary, with Gemma Arterton as the title character. In the romantic comedy, in French and English with subtitles, Brits Gemma and husband Charlie (Jason Flemyng), take up residence in a Normandy farmhouse, in the same village where the famous novel was written. Bonus features include a pair of featurettes and a master class with director Anne Fontaine.
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Music to Their Ears
Funny Business
The visual companion to the Kristin Chenoweth concert CD of the same name, Coming Home (Concord), the DVD contains all 15 songs on the album, including a pair of tunes from Wicked (“Popular” and “For Good”), as well as the diminutive diva’s renditions of tunes both show (“Bring Him Home,” “Maybe This Time,” “Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again”) and pop (“No More Tears (Enough Is Enough),” “I Will Always Love You,”), and includes bonus material such as a look behind the scenes and Chenoweth’s Father’s Day video.
Ted 2 (Universal) re-teams New England knuckleheads writer/ director Seth MacFarlane and actor Mark Wahlberg in the sequel to the popular and raunchy comedy about John (Wahlberg) and his trash-talking Teddy bear Ted (voiced by MacFarlane). This time out, John and Ted call on stoner lawyer Samantha (Amanda Seyfried) in their court battle against the Commonwealth of Massachusetts. Unrated Bluray+DVD+ Digital bonus features include gag reel, deleted scenes, a “giant opening dance number,” feature commentary and more.
The Mekons, “the most revolutionary group in the history of rock’n’roll” according to Lester Bangs, is the subject of Joe Angio’s documentary Revenge of the Mekons (Music Box Films). Following the band from its 1977 birth in the British punk rock scene to the present day, the doc includes interviews Fred Armisen, Jonathan Franzen and Mary Harron, as well as band members Sally Timms, Jon Langford and others. Bonus features include a live performance at Bell House in Brooklyn, a Mekons symposium at Columbia University, outtakes and additional interviews.
Co-written and co-directed by Lola Bessis and Ruben Amar, Swim Little Fish Swim (Indie Pix)invites us into the crowded Chinatown apartment of nurse Mary (Brooke Bloom), her “overgrown adolescent” husband Leeward (Dustin Guy Defa) and their three year old daughter Rainbow (or Maggie, depending on whose talking to her), as they welcome housemate Lilas (Lola Bessis), and struggle to keep their heads above water in New York.
For more movie reviews and gift ideas, please visit livingoutli.org and click on “Out and About”
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Docs for Days “The Story of How A Kinky Rebellious Street Festival Captured The Heart of San Francisco,” Folsom Forever (Breaking Glass) is director Mike Skiff’s tribute to the “scrappy little” San Francisco neighborhood in the “heart of the gay male leather scene” began its 1984 transformation during the AIDS crisis and encroaching gentrification to become what it is today.
In case you (or anyone on your holiday gift list) didn’t get your Lego fill with the 2014 animated Lego Movie, Daniel Junge and Kief Davidson’s A Lego Brickumentary (Radius/ Anchor Bay) should help with any unanswered questions about the Lego brand. Deleted scenes are the sole bonus feature on the DVD. Released theatrically in 1985 (after being banned by PBS), Joel DeMott and Jeff Kreines’ controversial doc Seventeen (Icarus Films), part of Peter Davis’ Middletown series, may look tame by today’s standards, but at the time, the insight it provided into the lives of high school teens was revelatory and shocking, and is still worth seeing now. Not for the faint of heart, Jimmy Chin and Elizabeth Chai Vasarhelyi’s doc Meru (Music Box Films) takes viewers to new and terrifying heights, as Alpinists Conrad Anker, Renan Ozturk and Chin, attempt to climb Mount Meru’s Himalayan “shark fin,” more than 20,000 feet above the Ganges River. The late Swiss surrealist artist H. R. Giger, who has infiltrated the nightmares of many fans of science fiction (the Alien series) and rock and roll (Emerson, Lake & Palmer’s Brain Salad Surgery album cover) is the subject of Belind Sallin’s thorough and thoroughly fascinating doc Dark Star: H.R. Giger’s World (Icarus Films). DVD extra features include a “making of” doc and Giger photo galleries.
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EAST END
WEDDINGS
W IN E & SPIRITS
Brunch TO U R S
COCKTAILS HAMPTONS
Pt and
FRIEND LY
GETAWAY
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be scene 20TH ANNUAL LGBT CONFERENCE TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 17TH, AT THE STONY BROOK UNIVERSITY CHARLES B. WANG CENTER OVER 400 STUDENTS, EDUCATORS, PROFESSIONALS, AND COMMUNITY MEMBERS CAME OUT TO ATTEND THIS YEAR’S ALL-DAY CONFERENCE. STUDENTS FROM DOZENS OF LONG ISLAND SCHOOL DISTRICTS PARTICIPATED IN MORE THAN 20 WORKSHOPS. SPECIAL TO THIS YEAR WAS GUEST SPEAKER, KEVIN SCHUSTER, AN INTERNATIONAL EXCHANGE STUDENT FROM SAMOA WHO SPOKE ABOUT THE DIFFERENT GENDER IDENTITIES USED IN THE PACIFIC ISLANDS.
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LIVING HEALTHY
Wellness
by jennifer nyx
Green is the New Sexy!
Lose Weight by Eating Your Greens There are tons of books and programs out there that claim to have the answer for helping you to lose weight, reverse disease, and otherwise reclaim your health. But no one book has everyone’s answer. If it did, there would only be one book. However, when it comes to achieving optimal health, there are a few basic principles that apply to almost everyone. The most basic universal principle is that we all need to eat more plants. Dark, nutrient dense leafy greens, vegetables and fruits of all colors, shapes and sizes – these natural foods hold the key to health and longevity for us all. It’s hard, though, to actually consume enough of them in quantities that will make a real and noticeable difference in our lives. That is – unless you throw them all in a blender and drink them! If you’ve not yet been acquainted, let me introduce you to the Green Smoothie! If there were only one thing you could do for your health to make a truly noticeable difference right away, and a lasting difference for the rest of your life, I’d recommend you learn how to make and enjoy a daily green smoothie. It is the quickest, healthiest way to gain more energy! When blended properly, it’s a delightfully refreshing treat that transcends the color in the glass. And when you realize all the health benefits of drinking green smoothies, you won’t want to live without them.
Why Greens?
The most nutrient dense foods on the planet might seem the least likely. They’re leafy green vegetables. Foods like spinach, kale, collards, swiss chard (and more) are the foods with the most nutrients in the most pure form, with the fewest amount of calories per serving. Want to lose weight? Eat your greens! Americans eat fewer leafy green vegetables than any other food. We need them the most, but eat them the least, and our waistlines are proof. Part of the reason is, let’s be honest – greens aren’t the easiest food to eat. Not in salads, not when we cook them. It takes some work to prepare them, to make them taste good, and sometimes, even to chew and swallow.
Why Blend It?
Quantity: To get the most out of eating leafy greens, you need to eat a LOT of them. This is actually a time consuming task, and unless you love greens more than any other food on the planet and plan to eat several large salads a day, you aren’t likely to eat them in the quantities that will deliver serious health benefits. Taste: Let’s face it: with our modern processed diet, many of our taste buds have a hard time appreciating the taste of greens. Some of us love them, but for those who don’t, hiding them in a smoothie is the perfect way to counter that particular objection. Benefits of Raw: There is a lot of evidence pointing to the benefits of eating raw foods. Most plants, when cooked, tend to lose their nutrients to varying degrees, depending on the temperature at which they are cooked, the method, etc. Since the greens in your smoothie are always raw, you get the benefit of all the nutrients in their purest, whole food state.
Digestion: Greens are called roughage for a reason; they can be pretty rough on our intestinal tracts. And when we chew, we don’t always get all the benefits of the food. According to Dr. Joel Fuhrman, longtime advocate of achieving nutritional excellence through the consumption of a plant-based diet, “When we simply chew a salad, about 70 to 90 percent of the [plant] cells are not broken open. As a result, most of the valuable nutrients contained within those cells never enter our bloodstream.” Since the food in a smoothie has already been mostly liquefied from going through the blender, your body will digest the food much more easily, and assimilate the nutrients much faster. When your body gets the nutrients into your system, you will feel it immediately.
The Basic Three Minute Green Smoothie
You’ll need: A blender. The higher powered, the better. But really, any blender that works will do the trick. Don’t delay simply because you don’t have a Vitamix on your kitchen counter! Two cups of loose, leafy green vegetables. The amount is purely based on what you want to achieve. If you want to ease into the smoothies and are a bit apprehensive about the taste of them in a blended drink, a handful of spinach is a great place to start. If you want to be amazed by the jolt of energy and clarity you’ll feel after drinking one, you’ll want to fill your blender (loosely!) to the top with one or more of the variety of greens listed earlier in this chapter. 1 to 2 bananas and a 6 to 8 oz bag of frozen fruit 1 cup of pure cold water (more or less to taste) Start by filling your blender with the greens, then add the water and blend thoroughly. If you’ve filled the blender to the top with the greens, the volume should come down about halfway after blended. Peel and add the bananas. You may want to start with one and see how full your blender becomes, but if the bananas are small, be sure to add the second for the creamy consistency and natural sweetness necessary to counter the taste of any greens. Next, add your fruit. Because the fruit is frozen, the nutrients are just as powerful, if not more so, than in fresh fruit. The convenience of a frozen bag of fruit
can’t be denied – no peeling, no washing, no mess. And the frozen factor means you don’t have to add ice to get the smoothie to be – well, a smoothie! The first few times you do this, you may find you have to experiment a bit with the amounts of water and greens that feel right to you. So give yourself a bit of time.
Adding Other Ingredients
While you don’t need to add other ingredients, you might want to, for the benefit of taste or nutrition. If you’re looking for more flavor, try an all natural fruit juice. Just stay away from anything that contains added sugar, syrup, or preservatives. If you want a more creamy consistency, you might try soy or almond milk, or yogurt. The possibilities and combinations are endless if you really want to be adventurous. There are lots of resources out there to help you sort through the options.
When and How To Enjoy
If you’re one of those people who feels as if you don’t have time for a healthy breakfast, well now you do, and research suggests that eating plants first thing in the morning is an extremely healthy way to start your day. Three minutes is all it takes to whip up this recipe if you want it fresh. You can prepare it the night before and have it ready if you or your family aren’t willing to endure the early morning noise. If you’ve made a whole pitcher, you might also try filling a portable shaker bottle so you can enjoy one before lunch, for lunch, or as a snack. Just store it in a refrigerator, and leave enough room in the bottle to be able to shake the contents, as they will settle and thicken over the course of a few hours. So, get your sexy on and start eating your greens!
ABOUT THE AUTHOR: JENNIFER NYX IS A HOLISTIC HEALTH COACH AND PERSONAL TRAINER DEDICATED TO SUPPORT HER CLIENTS WITH THEIR HEALTH GOALS AND EMPOWER THEM TO MAKE LASTING CHANGES IN THEIR BEHAVIOR AND LIFESTYLE. YOU CAN FIND HER AT NYXWELLNESS.COM 24
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LIVING HEALTHY
by oriol r. gutierrez, Jr.
health
Positive Thoughts: *Q&A with Mondo Guerra Mondo Guerra, pictured below, is a fashion designer who first came to fame in 2010 as a contestant on the eighth season of the reality television show Project Runway. Although he didn’t win, Guerra was a fan favorite, even before he disclosed his HIVpositive status on the show. At that moment he also took on the role of HIV/AIDS activist.
Five years after publicly disclosing he has HIV, Guerra explains how his life has changed and shares his goals for the future.
with pneumonia over Christmas in 2009. With my family and friends visiting me, I asked my doctors not to disclose any information.
What prompted you to get tested for the virus in 2001 at the age of 22?
They were walking into a room with a bed where I was hooked up to this and that, and in my heart and mind I was dying of AIDS. I still didn’t talk about it. I hit rock bottom, and I knew I had to start taking better care of myself.
When I was younger, I believed, like every young person, that I was invincible. I was not making the best decisions. I could feel there was something different about me. So I got tested, and my test came back positive.
Guerra went through a whirlwind of media attention. Since then, his celebrity profile has certainly increased. He won the debut season of Project Runway All Stars and became a mentor on Under the Gunn (a spinoff series named after Project Runway host Tim Gunn). His designs include apparel, accessories and jewelry.
After the diagnosis, I was devastated. I grew up in a Latino household and community, and there was never any discussion about HIV/AIDS, so it was definitely scary to me. I did not know how to deal with it.
Guerra has also found a way to connect his design career with his advocacy. In addition to being a spokesperson for “I Design,” an HIV/ AIDS media campaign sponsored by Merck, Guerra is a spokesperson for “Dining Out for Life,” an annual fundraiser sponsored by Subaru, in which restaurants donate proceeds to local HIV/AIDS groups.
When I was newly diagnosed, I was very ashamed and afraid. I didn’t really seek any support. I hate to say this, but in a lot of ways, looking back now, being raised Roman Catholic, I felt like it was some kind of punishment. I stayed silent about my positive status even up to when I was in the hospital
Know Your Status for you and your partners Free HIV and STD/STI Testing Available during drop-in hours and by appointment at all locations of The Long Island LGBT Community Center.
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The Hamptons LGBT Center 44 Union Street, Sag Harbor By Appointment
Free, quick, and confidential testing for HIV, syphilis, chlamydia, and gonorrhea. For more information or to schedule an appointment, contact the HIV/STD Outreach and Testing Program at testing@lgbtnetwork.org or 631.665.2300 Nassau Center at Woodbury 20 Crossways Park Dr. N., Suite 110 Woodbury, NY 11797 T 516.323.0011 F 516.750.4715
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Suffolk West Center at Bay Shore 34 Park Avenue Bay Shore, NY 11706 T 631.665.2300 F 631.665.7874
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I started taking medical advice and the proper treatments that I needed, and I got better very quickly. I had goals. For such a long time before I was in the hospital, HIV was defining who I was as a person and also as a creative.
We had dinner. I knew in my heart – which was beating a million miles an hour – that I just had to come out with it, so I told my parents. “I know” was the first thing my mom told me, that motherly instinct I have always heard about. We talked some more, then my mom said, “I am proud of you.” That helped me to talk about HIV/AIDS more. I get very emotional about it still because I felt the love that came from the table that night, and it hurts me still because I didn’t trust them and that made me feel bad. Speaking of your family, your mom and aunts inspired some of your eye wear.
The creative part of me was dying, so I had no reason to live. This creativity, the outlets where I was able to express myself, I used them to escape, a way to get through the day. This emotional and spiritual support is an important part of keeping me going.
My eye wear collection is inspired by family and friends. There is a whole set of eye wear that is named after my mom and her sisters. It is my way to give back to them, because they have been so supportive and inspirational. It is the least I can do.
Tell us about your decision to disclose on Project Runway in 2010.
I’ve had the great opportunity to have a reality show competition pivot me into some visibility for my designs. It has been such a blessing to have a crossover between my creative work and my advocacy.
My revelation on Project Runway was life-changing. It came from fear and turned into a huge sense of responsibility. I walked out on that runway in such a mood, but two hours later I was like, “What are people going to say?” I was completely scared, so it wasn’t until four days before the episode aired that I told my parents. My parents still live in the home that I grew up in. At the dinner table, we have assigned seating that has never changed.
Any collaboration that I do at this point must have some kind of way to give back. So I’m glad that part of the See eye wear proceeds goes to amfAR, The Foundation for AIDS Research. It just makes sense to me to be able to do that for others. What’s next for you? Right now, I am focusing on restructuring my business. I would love to focus more on my fashion. Advocacy remains dear to me, so I would like more ways to do this crossover of my interests. I am working on a new show where I am allowed to communicate about HIV and my creative work. I’m not very sure on the direction of it, but it’s important for me to give inspiration and information to young people. *This interview originally appeared on POZ.com. Oriol R. Gutierrez Jr. is the editor-in-chief of POZ magazine. Find him on Twitter @oriolgutierrez. This column is a project of Plus, Positively Aware, POZ, TheBody.com and Q Syndicate, the LGBT wire service. Visit their websites — hivplusmag.com, positivelyaware.com, poz.com and thebody.com – for the latest updates on HIV/AIDS. Editor’s Note: The LGBT Network offers a wide range of programs and services to help prevent HIV, get tested and linakge to care. For more information please visit lgbtnetwork.org. LIVING OUT
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Exciting Career Opportunities! Grow at the LGBT Network and make a difference in the lives of LGBT Long Islanders OPEN POSITIONS PrEP Outreach and Education Specialist (F/T)
Outreach and Early Intervention Specialist (F/T)
Long Island Gay and Lesbian Youth (LIGALY) has an immediate opening for a Pre-exposure Prophylaxis (PrEP) Outreach and Education Specialist. The principal roles of the PrEP Outreach and Education Specialist are: to engage high risk young gay and bi-sexual men and adult transgender women and provide them with information about the medication Truvada (PrEP) with the aim of connecting candidates for this medication to clinicians for PrEP prescription and medication management; and 2) provide informational sessions to clinicians aimed at increasing their knowledge about the utility of PrEP in lowering the risk of HIV infection with the aim to facilitate more clinicians to prescribe the medication to high risk candidates. Qualifications: Bachelors degree required, Masters preferred in public health, social work, education or related field; 3 years of experience providing outreach and HIV/STD prevention education to individuals at high risk; significant demonstrated knowledge about PrEP medication; 3 years of experience conducting individual and group presentations to diverse audiences; commitment to and knowledge of the LGBT community and the HIV epidemic in Queens, Suffolk, & Nassau counties; Ability to multi-task and work both independently and as part of team in a fast-paced environment. Please see website for full description & requirements.
Long Island Gay and Lesbian Youth (LIGALY) has an immediate opening for a Outreach and Early Intervention Specialist (OEIS) aimed at connecting HIV positive individuals to needed treatment services and supporting their medication adherence. Responsibilities: Conduct community based, mobile, and virtual outreach engaging high risk gay and bi-sexual men and transgender women in social and community settings; Conduct on-site screenings to determine HIV risk, status and testing history; Make referrals for follow up appointments for HIV testing and more comprehensive screening/assessments; Provide supervision and coordination to Peer Outreach Consultants. Perform comprehensive assessments of HIV+ individuals to gain an understanding of prevalent issues that may impede entering and maintaining HIV treatment. Qualifications: BA degree in Public Health, Social Services, etc; MSW with counseling experience preferred; 3 years experience in performing HIV outreach to high risk populations in nontraditional settings and using the internet as a means of connecting with and engaging with individuals engaged in high risk sex and drug activity; 3 years experience employing HIV evidence based interventions to help counsel and engage individuals in treatment. Please see website for full description & requirements.
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AXA Equitable Life Insurance Company (NY, NY), an AXA Advisors affiliate, has earned a perfect score of 100 percent on the Human Rights Campaign (HRC) Foundation’s Corporate Equality Index (CEI), recognizing the company as one of the “Best Places to Work for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender (LGBT) Equality” for 2015.
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Opportunity Employer M/F/D/V. AGE-108962 (11/15)(Exp. 11/17)
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LIVING SMART
recipes
Healthy Holiday Recipes Slimmed Down Green Bean Casserole Ingredients: 3-4 medium shallots, in their skins 1 1/2 tsps Kosher salt 1 lb. fresh green beans, stemmed & halved crosswise 1 tbsp extra-virgin olive oil 8 oz. (4 cups) cremini mushrooms, sliced 2 tbsps unsalted butter
3 tbsps all-purpose flour 1 1/2 cups mushroom, vegetable, or chicken broth 3 tsps fresh thyme leaves Ground black pepper Vegetable cooking spray 1 cup fresh bread crumbs
Oven Baked Latkes
Directions:
Ingredients:
1.
Cooking spray 1 lb. Russet potatoes 1 large egg white 1/4 cup scallions. finely chopped 1/2 cup applesauce, no sugar added
Preheat the oven to 400 degrees F. Put the shallots (in their skins) on a small baking dish, roast until soft, about 30 minutes. When cool enough to handle, skin and coarsely chop the shallots. Set aside. 2. Bring a medium-large saucepan of water to a boil over high heat. Add kosher salt, to taste. Add the green beans, and cook, uncovered, until crisp-tender and bright green, about 3 minutes. Drain the beans in a colander and rinse with cold water. Transfer the beans to a large bowl. 3. In the same saucepan, heat the oil over medium heat. Add the mushrooms, season with 1 teaspoon salt, cook, stirring occasionally, until browned, about 7 minutes. Add the mushrooms to the beans. 4. Melt the butter in a small saucepan over medium heat. Add the flour and cook, stirring with a wooden spoon, until golden, about 2 minutes. Slowly whisk in the broth, increase the heat to high, and bring to a boil. Add the shallots, 1 teaspoon of the thyme, and remaining 1/2 teaspoon of salt. Reduce the heat to maintain a simmer and cook until thickened, stirring occasionally, about 5 minutes. Pour the sauce over the vegetables and stir to combine evenly. 5. Spray a 2-quart baking dish with vegetable cooking spray. Transfer the vegetable mixture to the pan. Add the remaining 2 teaspoons of thyme to bread crumbs and scatter over the vegetables. 6. Bake uncovered until the sauce bubbles and the crumbs brown, about 20 minutes. Tips: When sautéing mushrooms, salt them right away – they will release moisture and you can use less oil; 1 cup fresh bread crumbs has less calories than 1 cup dried; Roasting whole shallots is an excellent way to cook them using absolutely no fat.
Winter Fruit Salad Ingredients: 1/2 cup sugar 1 1 -inch piece ginger, peeled and thinly sliced 1 vanilla bean, split lengthwise and seeds scraped out 1 lemon 5 large navel or blood oranges 2 mangoes, peeled and diced 2 firm bananas, peeled and diced 5 kiwis, peeled and diced 12 kumquats, very thinly sliced crosswise, seeds removed 1 cup pomegranate seeds (from 1 pomegranate)
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1/4 cup sour cream, reduced fat Kosher salt Groud black pepper
Directions: 1.
Preheat the oven to 450 degrees F. Mist a baking sheet with the cooking spray. 2. Peel the potatoes and then grate on the large holes of a box grater. Transfer to a fine-mesh sieve and squeeze out as much liquid as possible into a bowl. Let the liquid settle for about 10 minutes, and then pour off the watery liquid, reserving the potato starch. 3. Beat the egg white in a large bowl until it holds a soft peak. Gently fold in the potatoes, scallions, reserved potato starch, 1/2 teaspoon salt and 1/4 teaspoon pepper. 4. Drop the mixture by tablespoons on the prepared baking sheet, spacing the latkes about 2 inches apart. Gently spread and flatten into 2 1/2-inch rounds. Roast until the bottoms are browned, 8 to 10 minutes. 5. Flip and roast until the potatoes are cooked through and the bottoms are spotted brown, 4 to 6 minutes. 6. Serve with the applesauce and sour cream. Tip: Mix reduced-fat shredded cheese (Cheddar, Mozzarella, etc.) into the latke mix to make them a cheesy delight! If applesauce and sour cream don’t whet your appetite, make sure to use low or reduced fat toppings of your choice.
Directions: 1.
2.
3.
Combine the sugar, 2 cups water, the ginger and vanilla seeds and pod in a saucepan. Use a vegetable peeler to remove wide strips of zest from the lemon and 1 orange, add to the saucepan and bring to a boil over mediumhigh heat. Reduce the heat and simmer 5 minutes. Refrigerate until cold. Meanwhile, peel the remaining oranges with a paring knife, cutting along the natural curve of the fruit. Hold an orange over a large bowl and cut along both sides of each membrane to free the segments, letting them fall into the bowl. Squeeze each empty membrane to release the juices. Repeat with the remaining oranges. Add the mangoes, bananas, kiwis, kumquats and pomegranate seeds and gently toss. Pour the syrup over the fruit and chill overnight. Before serving, remove the citrus zest, ginger and vanilla pod. Spoon the fruit and syrup into bowls. LIVING OUT
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LIVING SMART
finance
A NEW HOME:
RENTING VS. BUYING Many of us may be comfortable with our current living arrangements. However, when the time comes, people may want to explore other options. Each individual or family has to weigh their current life situation to determine if it would be better for them to rent a home or if they can settle down and buy a home. Below, we will explore both options:
RENTING Depending on your life situation, you might find renting to be more beneficial. Renting, in general, will offer you more flexibility. If you are unsure about living in a specific neighborhood, renting allows you to explore an area further before committing to living there for a long term and becoming a homeowner. Renting is a good route to take if you are unsure about your current career path or income as well, as you’ll have the ability to re-locate if the right job opportunity or income arises. Renting is nice as there are generally no maintenance expenses. If you have a pipe that leaks, or an issue with the flooring or major appliances such as the refrigerator or stove, call the landlord. It is his/her responsibility to have it fixed or repaired. One other benefit to renting is that you won’t have to worry about owning a depreciating asset in the event your home loses value. Of course, there are disadvantages too to renting a home. Your rental costs may increase, and that could get adjusted as soon as your lease ends. In addition, you will not build equity in your home since you do not own it. Homeowners also have the ability to receive tax benefits through deductions involving their home, but as a tenant in a rental those tax benefits aren’t available. Last but not least, you wouldn’t be able to make any remodeling changes or paint without the approval of the landlord. 28
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BUYING
One major benefit of owning a home is the ability to build equity in it. As you pay off a home mortgage, you slowly begin to increase your degree of ownership in the home. This is a substantial value that helps with either taking out another loan (a home equity loan, for example) on the property. As you build more equity into the home as well, you can always explore re-financing your mortgage for a better rate to further save more money in the long run. As a homeowner, you have the ability to claim certain tax deductions for your home. Owning a home allows you to do what you want with your home in terms of re-modeling or painting, within town/city laws and regulations. Owning a home also allows you to decide how you want to make maintenance decisions. If a pipe breaks, do you want to fix it yourself, or hire a plumber? You get to decide. If you live in a condo or a homeowners’ association though, you might pay a monthly fee to have it covered by the association’s contractors. If the value of your property appreciates in value, you would directly benefit from it if you sell your home. While owning a home gives you these freedoms, there are also a few that it doesn’t give you. Owning a home is a big investment, potentially worth hundreds of thousands of dollars. You also wouldn’t have the ability to relocate as easily if your income or job situation changes. Also, if the value of the property depreciates, it can hurt you in the long run. You would also be responsible for paying the property taxes, and homeowner’s insurance is mandatory if you have a mortgage. Also, you would need to use up your savings as a down payment on the home, which could potentially be a large sum of your savings.
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LIVING SMART
What’s the t?
by Alexis Capitini
the ultimate
HOLIDAY guide TECH cameras they want GoPro HERO4 - SILVER
From gaming consoles to wearable tech and everything inbetween, Living Out has the hottest items this holiday season
1
FUJIFILM XQ2 For those who want better image quality than a phone, but still want a simple pointand-shoot experience.
A speaker with personality, the Echo makes a great way to bring voice control to yout home. $180, amazon.com
2
Excellent photo and video quality, a big set of shooting options and the convenience of a built-in touchscreen. $400, gopro.com
AMAZON ECHO
3
XBOX ONE ELITE
The most interesting, and most expensive, console available with a solid-state hybrid drive. $500, microsoftstore.com
FITBIT CHARGE HR
Track your daily steps, distance, sleep and calories burned. The Charge HR also continuously checks your pulse. $150, fitbit.com
$300, amazon.com
DxO ONE A camera that attaches to any modern iPhone or iPad (the one with the Lightning connector). Take your photos up a notch! $600, dxo.com 30
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SURFACE 3
Tablet-hybrids marry the best parts of having a tablet with the usefulness of a laptop. 64GB - $499.99, bestbuy.com
APPLE TV
Apple TV now acts as a bridge from your HomeKit devices to the cloud; also has glass touch surface & dual microphones for talking to Siri. $150, apple.com
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PIPER nv PRO
Between the app, the custom notifications and the free saved clips triggered by personalized settings, Piper comes prepared to act as a valiant sentry. $390, getpiper.com
don’t forget the games! CALL OF DUTY: BLACK OPS 3 Xbox One, PS4, Xbox 360, PS3, PC $60
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PS4 LIMITED EDITION
This 500GB PlayStation 4 ships with a digital copy of Star Wars: Battlefront and a voucher for four Star Wars Classics. $400, bestbuy.com
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FALLOUT 4 Xbox One, PS4, Xbox 360, PS3, PC $60
TURTLE BEACH ELITE 800 & 800X
HALO 5: GUARDIANS
Surround sound headset for PS4 (800) & Xbox One (800X) with 7.1 virtual sound and satisfying bass. $300, bestbuy.com
Xbox One $60
SUPER MARIO MAKER Nintendo Wii U $60
SAMSUNG GEAR S2
Looks great and uses an innovative spinning bezel for navigation. It can runs apps, display notifications from your Android device, and track your fitness. $300, samsung.com
STAR WARS BATTLEFRONT Xbox One, PS4, Xbox 360, PS3, PC $60
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IPAD MINI 2 While not the newest version, save some dough and stick with the older model as a gift this year. $320, apple.com
RISE OF THE TOMB RAIDER Xbox One, PS4, Xbox 360, PS3, PC $60
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Quality Healthcare Services for Individuals with Special Needs and the Community at Large
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Comprehensive and Caring Medical Services Lunchtime, Evening & Weekend Hours Medicare, Medicaid, and Some Major Health Insurance Plans Accepted Sliding Scale Available for those Eligible Most Credit Cards Accepted
Family Wellness Center
120 Plant Avenue Hauppauge, NY 11788 Appointments: (631) 851-3810 www.familyres.org fwcinfo@familyres.org
You are not alone, you are…FREE To Be FREE To Be is a community of men and women dedicated to socialization, advocacy, and education. We support a network that provides a safe environment to grow together. Socialization/Group Meetings FREE To Be provides an engaging space for GLBTQ individuals and friends, and we encourage all who are interested to come and join us. Meetings Include Inspirational guest speakers, workshops, open discussions, social events, and community involvement. Next Meeting Date: December 29, 2015 and January 26, 2016 Time: 4:30pm to 6:00pm Location: FREE, 191 Bethpage-Sweet Hollow Road Old Bethpage, New York 11804
To learn more about FREE TO BE or to become a member, please contact us at freetobe@familyres.org Family Residences and Essential Enterprises, Inc. 191 Bethpage-Sweet Hollow Road l Old Bethpage, New York 11804 www.familyres.org l 516-870-1637
POINTS OF VIEW
trans-missions
by gwendolyn Ann smith
The Tip
Last year, Time Magazine said we had reached the “Transgender tipping point.” Since then, Olympic hero Caitlyn Jenner has joined other high-profile transgender celebrities such as Janet Mock, Laverne Cox, Laura Jane Grace, and others. The visibility of transgender people in the mainstream media has never been higher. In spite of all the visibility, however, one topic dominates transgender issues more than any celebrity: bathrooms. I’ve talked about bathrooms a lot, so much so that I’m really not sure I have much new to say.
In Houston, Texas the referendum on their equal rights, Houston’s Human Rights Ordinance (HERO for short), failed. The bill covered a total of fifteen protected classes against bias in several categories. It failed by a vote of 61% to 39%. Once again, the adage that you should never allow a vote on minority rights rings true. Such a struggle almost always fails. Everyone is now busy trying to figure out why it lost, and laying blame all over the place. Even unfairly at the feet of the black community, or celebrities such as Beyoncé. I don’t think you can so easily claim that this or that group did not do enough. While I think a lot of LGBT groups could have done more – it failed because the “other side” dominated the discussion. They did so by using the “bathroom meme,” claiming that this bill would somehow allow predators to be allowed to go into changing rooms and restrooms and victimize your wife or children. Televisions and radios played commercials making the above claim, and T-shirts on opponents to HERO declared, “No Men in Women’s Bathrooms. Vote NO on Houston’s Prop #1.” Few seemed to know
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what the bill actually covered; only believing it was only about men in women’s rooms. This is how well the opposition controlled the dialogue. As I’ve already said, I don’t want to talk about bathrooms anymore. I feel like I’ve made it as clear as I can that rights for transgender people do not lead to predators in women’s rooms. The facts back it up: there have been no cases of
Transgender people are being cast as the enemy of decency, as something to fear, something to feel uncomfortable about. assault in any city where these rights have been given. These bills do not repeal any sexual assault laws. It’s ludicrous. You cannot, however, appeal to facts when it comes to arguments claiming people dear to you will be victimized, and you will have no recourse. As ridiculous as the argument is, for many it seems to trip a primal trigger. They go against logic, seeking only to defend what they find precious. What the transgender community needs right now is an emotional argument that helps those so triggered to stand down, to feel they’re loved ones are safe and
protected – and are safer with transgender protections in place. With the loss of HERO we will see more of these fights against transgender rights crop up, especially in a Presidential election year, when Conservatives want to get out the vote. This too is akin to what went down with Proposition 8 and other antimarriage bills. This is exactly why conservative groups seem to be heavily invested in culture wars: it gets people out to vote for their candidates as they pull the lever against us. Speaking of the Presidential race: Presidential candidate Ben Carson also chimed in on HERO, for what it’s worth. “It is not fair for [transgender people] to make everybody else uncomfortable, Carson said. “It’s one of the things that I don’t particularly like about the movement.” This man is one of the top GOP picks at current, which should scare you. I can’t help but ask who else has “made everybody else uncomfortable” in the bathroom. As I’ve said before, every rights battle seems to have its bathroom moment. Heck, the same arguments were used with race segregated bathrooms as well as the Equal Rights Amendment battle of the 1970s. I got talking about bathrooms again, didn’t I? Enough about them: here’s what I really want to talk about. In this country, since November 20th, 2014, Twenty-two transgender people have been reported killed due to anti-transgender violence. They – and the likely hundreds more killed worldwide – were honored on November 20th, the Transgender
Day of Remembrance. This was the seventeenth annual TDOR observance. The number of deaths are higher than years past, though I can’t tell you for sure if they’re higher because we’re paying more attention, or because they are more trans people being killed. My gut tells me that it’s a bit of both. Many have claimed that visibility of Caitlyn Jenner and others that make up “The Transgender Tipping point” are indirectly responsible for the increase in murders. This, to me, feels a bit like claiming Beyoncé not speaking out in support led to the loss of HERO. For me, though, I can’t help but look at the people fighting bills in Houston and elsewhere. How can you expect to tell people about how giving rights to transgender people will allow sexual deviants to harm your family and not expect people to react. As I said above, that was the whole point of the bathroom meme. Some may defend their loved ones by voting, but others do so by grabbing a weapon. Like Ben Carson, some people are uncomfortable – and with their religious and political leaders attacking transgender people, they might feel equally at ease doing so. Transgender people are being cast as the enemy of decency, as something to fear, something to feel uncomfortable about. It’s not that much a step from this sort of vilification to seeking people seeking to kill us. HERO, bathrooms, and these attacks on transgender people are just the tip, and the stakes are higher than ever before.
Gwen Smith is so very much not a predator. You’ll find her on Twitter at @gwenners LIVING OUT
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BE DIFFERENT!
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Upcoming Attractions at The Space at Westbury
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Ticketmaster.com or charge by phone: 800-745-3000. Tickets can be purchased for all shows at the Box Office 2 hours before showtime.
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POINTS OF VIEW
op-ed
by rev. irene monroe
Remember our Homeless LGBTQ Youth This Holiday Season The Christmas season is a difficult time of year for many. Too often we see the glitz and glamour that this holiday brings, totally missing its spiritual message. The underlying message in celebrating the birth of Jesus is the full embrace of human difference and diversity. I truly believe if Americans – Christians and non-Christians, alike – stayed more focused on the message and teachings of Jesus, many lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer (LGBTQ) youth and young adults would not have the annual angst of searching for home for the holidays. Although Christmas is mostly thought of in terms of feasting and celebrating, Jesus, birth – like his death – was born of struggle, and that struggle was to be fully accepted. Similarly, when I think of the birth of Jesus, one of the themes that loom large for me is LGBTQ youth and young adult homelessness. Why homelessness?
care, or come from families torn apart by poverty, AIDS, drug abuse or eviction, these youth sleep in the City’s parks, on the subway, and in public facilities such as Port Authority and Penn Station,” New Alternatives for LGBT Homeless Youth website reminded us. While homelessness of teen and youth populations are often attributed to family neglect, family tragedy, poverty, AIDS, drug abuse, eviction, or being aged out of foster care, our LGBTQ teen and youth populations that are homeless are, first and foremost, if not solely, because of their sexual orientation. And sadly, it sends a message that these homes rather have no child than a queer child. According to a 2011 study from Boston’s Children’s Hospital, published online on the “American Journal of Public Health” website it stated that when it comes to the private institution of the home, our LGBTQ youth are disproportionately thrown out of theirs, more often
Because many of us...do not really have a home to go to where we can sit at the family table and be fully out – or if out, fully accepted. asking us to rescue cannot/will not be able to make the contribution we need, so they are expendable.”
Because many of us, myself included, do not really have a home to go to where we can sit at the family table and be fully out – or if out, fully accepted. As with Mary and Joseph during the time of Jesus’ birth, we travel from inn-to-inn to only find there is no room. “I’m Queer. I’m Homeless. I’m Hungry. I’m Scared. I’m Tired,” was the ad one year by New Alternatives for LGBT Homeless Youth asking the American public to give the gift of $10 during the holiday season to help their homeless. “Every night, thousands of lesbian, gay bisexual and transgender youth and young adults are homeless in New York City. Whether they have been kicked out by homophobic families, forced to flee conservative communities, aged out of foster
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than their heterosexual peers, especially in communities of color like the African Americans one. Some years ago when I wrote about homelessness of African American LGBTQ youth this was a typical type of response I received from an irate blogger who read my piece on “Black Commentator’s” website. “Given that our resources are tight & these youth are not at all psychologically prepared for our liberation struggle, they are expendable. Such are the realities of war. It’s going to take all of our resources to salvage the heterosexual youth, who will hopefully form strong, loving, heterosexual relationships & produce healthy children. This is how we will produce a strong black nation/community. The dysfunctional youth you are
The perception that African American families and communities do not throw away their children because of the much-touted old African adage that espouses black unity, “It takes a village to raise a child,” rings false, it seems, when it comes to our LGBTQ youth. “The high risk of homelessness among sexual minority teens is a serious problem requiring immediate attention,” says Heather Corliss, PhD, MPH, of the Division of Adolescent and Young Adult Medicine at Children’s Hospital.“ Teens with a sexual minority orientation are more likely than heterosexual teens to be unaccompanied and homeless rather than part of a homeless family. These teens face enormous risks and all types of obstacles to succeeding in school and are in need of a great deal of assistance.” In Luke 2:6-7 it states “While they were there the time came for [Mary] to have her baby, and she gave birth
to a son – her firstborn. She wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn.” Our birth, as LGBTQ individuals and as a movement, mirrors that of Jesus. It comes at a time where there is still neither room nor tolerance for us – even in 2015 with U.S. Supreme ruling in favor of marriage equality – in some homes and families. Unfortunately, many of our homeless LGBTQ youth and young adult across this country this holiday season will not have a queer-friendly shelter to go to. And too many will spend the time alone even where homeless LGBTQ shelters across the country will be open because they gravely miss their families and communities. As we gear up for this holiday season let us enjoy the time and let us make home, if not with biological family, then certainly with beloved friends. But let us also not forget the continued struggle of the LGBTQ homeless youth and young adults searching for a home for the holidays.
Long Island Gay and Lesbian Youth (LIGALY) has been helping LGBT youth across Long Island for more than 22 years. Please call 631.665.2300 or 516.323.0011 or visit lgbtnetwork.org for more information regarding programs and services and how they can help you or someone you know. The LGBT Network is an association of 501(c)(3) non-profit organizations with locations in Nassau, Suffolk, the Hamptons and Queens. LIVING OUT
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